#no bc this makes me a little mad bc i chose every option to respect ava and mason's relationship and yet ?? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

hanbff · 5 years ago

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stray kids reaction: you being vegan

requested: yes “Hiiiii, skz reacting to vegan s/o pleaseee! Ty❣”

genre: fluff ?

a/n: i’ve never written something like this, this was an interesting request! thank you for requesting and i hope you like it! also some of these got a lil short bc i really couldn’t think of any ideas, i’m sorryyy

note: apologies for how long it is😭 i’m on mobile and i don’t know how to add “read more” so if anyone could tell me that would be great!

Chan:

chan wouldn’t really have a reaction? like nothing would change due to you being a vegan. but it did become a problem when you went out to eat or went to parties because most places around weren’t vegan. chan decided to take matters into his own hands and make sure, in advance, the place you were going to was vegan.

“hey felix, do you know if the restaurant we’re going to is vegan? i just want to make sure because...” his voice trailed off as he got up to do a few things in his room. you smiled at what you had heard, he cared enough to make sure you could have a good time at the party too.

he obviously couldn’t always do that and you knew that but seeing him so focused on finding a vegan place nearby made your heart burst. you heard him say his goodbyes and let out a loud sigh. you thought “maybe he didn’t find one”, so you walked into his room and waddled up to give him a back hug. he let out a yelp before turning to see you.

“god, you scared me!” he chuckled before placing a kiss on your forehead. you smiled before saying,

“you’re the best, i love you.” he was a little shocked at the sudden confession but happy nonetheless.

“well i love you more, angel”

Minho:

min would probably think nothing of it but if it was okay with you of course, he would sometimes tease you with things you used to love but now didn’t eat. like one morning, the boy was up making pancakes for himself as you both usually had separate breakfasts. you walked into the kitchen to see him eating some of the slightly messed up pancakes and he caught you looking.

he smirked before asking, “do you want some?” you let out a small chuckle before waving your hand in dismissal.

“no thanks, love” you replied. he hummed before drizzling maple syrup on his alright looking pancakes. you then whined as you thought about how much you missed pancakes. then you realised... you could make them yourself!

you decided to find a vegan recipe and get on with it. minho looked at you in confusion before following you to the fridge.

“what are you doing?” he asked, maple syrup still in his hand.

“making my own, much better, pancakes” you replied back, giving him a small smile. he smiled back before whispering in your ear,

“can i help you?”

Changbin:

bin would be slightly confused as to why you would voluntarily stop eating meat and whatnot but still would be supportive. he would pout slightly and feel a little bad when you said you couldn’t join the boys since they were going to a meat place that had absolutely no vegan options.

“it’s fine love, go and eat” you reassured him. he still seemed unconvinced but nodded before kissing you goodbye.

“please make sure you eat something before i come back!” he shouted before the door shut.

you smiled to yourself, getting up to make yourself a meal.

Hyunjin:

after walking around, you both decided it was time to eat. walking into a nearby restaurant, you both sat down and began looking at the menu. you scanned through the menu and were delighted to find a few vegan options. you went with (insert vegan options bc i’m clueless) and hyunjin went with a classic burger and fries.

hyunjin’s food arrived first and you couldn’t help but stare at it when the waiter placed it on the table. hyunjin looked at his food with joy before digging in. you had a small pout on your face while you scrolled through your phone. you then felt a finger poking you and when you looked up hyun was holding half of his burger, pushing it towards you. you looked at him with confusion, was he expecting you to eat that??

he looked back, with the same confusion, until it hit him. he nearly dropped his burger on the table before he covered his mouth in shock.

“babe, i went blank and completely forgot you can’t eat that, i’m so sorry!” he was rambling, apologising after every sentence or so. you had to stop him before you went mad, so you kissed his cheek.

“hyun, it’s alright you forgot, now carry on eating dumbass,” you giggled at his now red cheeks as he continued to eat again.

“did i say i’m sorry?”

“hyunjin!”

Jisung:

jisung would be really interested? like he’d ask you loads of questions like why’d you become one or what food do you miss eating the most, innocent questions like that. he would also try his best to find vegan recipes he could make since he did eat a lot of animal products. jisung sometimes felt a little bad for eating it in front of you, but you reassured him that it was fine.

“babe, should i make burgers?” he asked you. you shook your head, “nah it’s fine, i’ll order something”

“but i have a vegan substitute?” he walked over to you, showing you the packaging.

“see i made sure, i wanna have a meal with you again... like we usually do.” he whispered and you saw the sincerity on his face. he really wanted to have a meal with you, it had been a while and you can’t say you didn’t miss it too.

“alright show me what you got, chef jisung” you said as you jokingly bowed in front of him.

“babe, i don’t remember anyone having to bow down to a chef-”

“oh whatever, let’s make food!” you said happily running back to the kitchen. he smiled as he watched you, before following after.

Felix:

lix is very sweet and supportive about it, he would be very interested so he decided to try veganism for a week.

it went well... partly. he got through half of the week fine, the both of you finding vegan substitutes for nearly all of your favorite snacks. but felix completely forgot when the boys bought food after practice. he was starving so he dug in straight away, basically finishing his bowl in 5 minutes.

“lix, are you on some diet with y/n?” minho asked, stuffing his face with food.

felix’s eyes widen as he placed his bowl on the practice floor.

“no! i completely forgot!” he said, covering his face as the other boys laughed.

“it’ll be fine, i’m sure y/n won’t kill you,” jisung giggled as the other boys agreed. this slightly put felix at ease although he still felt a little bad for it. he decided to stop eating as he was full anyways and get back home after waving goodbye to the boys.

“bye felix, pray y/n doesn’t kill you!” says changbin as the other boys continue laughing at his worried but smiling expression.

as he got home and opened the door, he instantly smelt food. he walked to the kitchen where you were, stirring a pot while cutting up some vegetables.

“hey lix,” you said not turning around. he walked towards you before wrapping his arms around your waist.

“hey, what are you making?” he questioned, trying his hardest not to make it obvious. you smiled, feeling his breath against your neck and felix instantly knew you realised.

“well, since you’ve already eaten, this is for me.” you said, finishing your cutting.

felix pouted, “i didn’t mean to eat the meat! i was really hungry and decided to eat and completely forgot that- hey!” he was rambling o you decided to shove a few pieces of carrot in his mouth to shut him up.

“lix, it’s completely fine it’s not like you’re actually a vegan.” you giggled at his shocked expression before he tried to speak forgetting there were still carrots wedged in his mouth. he nearly chocked, quickly chewing and swallowing before trying to speak again.

“so... you’re not mad?” he questioned as you shook your head and he let out a deep breath he was holding for God knows how long. you turned to him, kissing his pink lips.

“i could never be mad at you, angel”

Seungmin:

seungmin knew you were vegan long before you told him as he just shrugged when you decided to finally tell him.

“i already knew y/n. it was a bit obvious, i haven’t see you stuff your face with all the junk in weeks!”

“hey, i do not stuff my face with junk!” you pouted as he just laughed. okay, maybe you did but thay was besides the point. you chose to tell him today because his family invited you both for a dinner later that day.

after you both arrived you sat opposite his sister, seungmin sitting right next to you. once everyone was there, people began looking through the menus and ordering. you found what you wanted and so did seungmin.

a while had passed and your food was finally being sent out. the waitress placed your food and you thanked her before she left. you looked into the silver tin that came with it and there was meat? you looked at seungmin who saw the tin and took it.

“let me eat that for you,” he began, eating half of it in one go. you smiled at him but smacked him on the thigh. he looked at you in confusion.

“you told me i stuff my face with junk but look at you! you look like a squirrel!” you laughed as he blushed before he nudged you.

“hey, if you must know this meat is not junk.” he said, trying to be serious but began laughing once he saw your smiling face.

“thanks for this, i love you.” he quickly said, stuffing the rest of the meat in his soft looking cheeks. you giggled before kissing his full cheeks.

“i love you too, kim seungmin.”

Jeongin:

jeongin would try his best to be respectful so sometimes he wouldn’t eat meat or anything animal related (?) in front of you, just incase you were uncomfortable. you found out at a regular café you two always went to when you saw him looking through the menu.

“yennie, when did you need to look through the menu? you always get the cake and coffee?” you questioned looking up from your phone.

“i decided i’m not going to eat anything that’s not vegan in front of you.” he said with a smile on his face.

you quirked a brow, before speaking again. “when was it a problem, love? you can eat whatever you want in front of me, you know that.”

“i just... thought it would maybe make you uncomfortable... i don’t know,” he trailed off, looking back at his menu in embarrassment.

“baby, it’s okay i promise i don’t feel uncomfortable when you eat all that in front of me, okay?” you said, placing your hand on his.

he looked up from his menu and gave you his signature smile. you smiled back before you both decided to finally order.

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thedeviljudges · 7 years ago

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bc i’m an indecisive asshole, here’s what would be the first chapter to this fic.

tattoos on the ether

Steve looks up at a brightly lit pink neon sign and thinks what the fuck have I gotten myself into.

He knows, of course, exactly what the fuck he’s gotten himself into and wonders when he traded any form of rational he’d managed to maintain in that stupid brain of his for ideas of grandeur and open roads. Steve’s travelled a few times in his life, mainly vising what little family he has out of state, but diving head first into the unknown was a plan he sure as shit hadn’t thought through.

Excluding the Upside Down, of course.

Not like he has time to ponder the possibility of that mistake when his next thought bubbles up without warning, toeing the line of desperate and annoyance when Steve feels the growl of his stomach. He doesn’t think he craves the salty bite of another greasy burger; in actuality, the notion makes him want to throw up, but it’s all he’s got, and his body needs sustenance, and diner number seven doesn’t look as bad as it sounds.

That’s what he tries to tell himself ever since he left Hawkins, passing through the Midwest on a one-way ticket to hell because he realized, quite quickly, just how similar these parts of the country are akin to the standard textbook definition: boring with a side of corn fields and cows. Steve could complain, knows that every bone in his body is screaming that if he doesn’t move, they’ll twitch until numbness takes over. It’s the last stop for miles if the crumbled-up map near his feet is worth its salt, and Steve doesn’t think he can go another few hours without anything solid in his stomach. The junk food he’d purchased over the course of the journey has accumulated as a stock-pile of goodies in the backseat of the car. There’s still plenty of it for consumption, but Steve’s sweet tooth isn’t opulent and very much like a diner burger, the thought of eating another Twinkie makes his tongue dry, throat constricting.

The fact that his blood is not a solid stream of white sugar is a miracle in and of itself, really.

“So, are you paying, moneybags?”

Steve breathes deeply and refuses to look at the driver of the car – the car he chose to sit his ass in and leave his home for because he really is a fucking moron who thought that maybe an adventure had its merits. Turns out, all it’s left him with is sore muscles and little patience because sometimes Billy doesn’t know when to keep his fucking mouth shut.

Rolling his eyes, Steve slides his fingers over the latch on the door, waiting. “How long are you going to be mad at me for?”

In a quick reply, Billy shrugs. Steve sees it out of the corner of his eye, still refuses to look at Billy and his temper he’s settled in for over a day. “Dunno,” he finishes, leather jacket creeping past his neck as he stares Steve down with a petulant expression behind the reflection of his glasses. Steve doesn’t need to see Billy’s eyes to know that he’s unhappy with their affair, and Steve isn’t entirely happy to say that it’s all his fault.

But it sort of is.

“You didn’t plan on telling me about the couple grand you stashed away,” he says, refuses to watch Billy pull his shades down the bridge of his nose, far enough to look over the lining while blinking directly at Steve like he’s boring into his soul. He’s settled deep into his seat, knees stretched wide as if there’s any room in the car for such a position, but he waits, expectantly, for Steve to make amends with a particularly good explanation, one he’s definitely not going to get right now when he’s being stubborn, “so, I’m thinkin’ I’ve got a little while longer to keep you on your toes.”

Sometimes, sometimes Steve wonders why the fuck he bothered, why the absolute fuck he went along with Billy’s plan to get the fuck out of Hawkins, why he chose Billy to spend his time with – to sleep with, for god’s sake – because this is an unruly amount of absurdity. Steve knows Billy’s tendency to stew on his emotions until he no longer finds them valuable, and this, Steve thinks, needs to be nipped in the bud before they end up hurtling towards no return. “You’re so fucking ornery,” he says, the crook of his brow a statement of clarity - Billy’s not the only one unimpressed.

Their emotions, rising high like the tide, are mainly due to circumstances and cramped spaces, the car occupied by two persons for an extended period of time without reprieve from each other. It’s been a good lesson for Steve, if anything, that as much as he loves Billy, he definitely needs his space, space in which he hasn’t had for about a solid week since they started their journey with nothing but a few duffle bags and the clothes on their back.

Also, the stash of money Steve had hidden in his, but that’s beside the point.

“I really can’t believe I put up with you.”

Billy snorts, but a wolfish grin splits his face into childish pride. He slides the glasses right back onto his nose before straightening in his seat, and just like Steve, he curls his fingers around the door handle, not waiting for a prompt to crack it wide open so the heat of summer quickly fills the car. “Looks like someone’s picked up a dictionary lately.”

Steve feels it, the way his nostrils flare, the turn of his lips as they settle into a deep frown. He’s an idiot; he knows this, but the matter isn’t meant to be brought in between an argument. As best as he can, Steve ignores the comment and the curl of hurt in his chest, lips thinning as he shakes off the bullshit with a simple, “Go fuck yourself,” as he opens the car door. Long-limbed and lanky, Steve doesn’t exert himself as he peels himself out of the car, turning quickly to duck down and smile sarcastically at Billy who looks more than a little annoyed. “You can starve.”

The slam the door makes is satisfying, only an added bonus to his pent-up frustrations. Steve knows they won’t stay mad at each other for long, and he also knows that really, he’s in the wrong for what he’d done – mainly for what he didn’t do, but he thought it the best decision at the time, made it last minute and stressed himself out to the point of no return.

Lying to his partner had never been his modus operandi, but some decisions needed figuring out before they were exposed to the light, and unfortunately for Steve’s, his timing had run out long before he’d been ready. As much as he’s at fault, however, he also knows that Billy is, too. For not letting him explain, for shutting off his emotions until the only thing he could say were one word replies that left Steve drained, completely ready for sleep to take him. He’s glad, if anything, that they’re speaking to one another, although it’s with passive aggressive intensity. But somewhere deep inside, Steve also feels Billy’s lack of presence, that solid weight he’s grown accustomed to now hollow from the distance between them.

Steve is utterly fucked.

The gravel under his feet gives off a satisfying crunch every time he steps across the rocks. Steve approaches the diner, already smelling grease and salt and hopes that maybe a salad might be an option on the menu, if only because his organs are begging. Behind him, Steve hears Billy fumbling behind him, curses spilling from his lips as he grabs his keys and slams the door shut. He catches up to Steve easily without losing breath, and the sunglasses are gone, eyes narrowed in the light of the setting sun. “I didn’t mean that,” he says lowly, but Steve pays him no mind as he opens the diner’s door and walks inside.

As expected, Billy follows him to a booth like they’ve done since the start of their journey. If it weren’t for the deep shades of red all along the walls and booths, Steve might’ve guessed they’d been here before, same diner, same small town in the middle of nowhere. But this isn’t full of pastel colors, and the building is practically empty save for a booth in the very back filled with older women; the shuffling of bodies behind the counter feel like busy little ants, hoping for the day to be over.

“Yes, you did,” Steve says a few minutes later, refuses to let Billy off the hook for his insult, and fortunately, he has the decency to look embarrassed for the comment. Not that Steve even minds much anymore, accepted the fact that maybe there were some things that weren’t his forte and that yes, Billy was definitely much better at stuff than him, but it didn’t stop the pang of regret for not being what he should’ve been from the beginning.

Just like Billy has his own regrets for not being what he should’ve been either.

Steve really hates that they’re two peas in a pod, doesn’t understand why they lucked out with underhanded disciplinary figures rather than parents who should’ve-

“I didn’t,” Billy insists, cuts Steve away from the trill of thoughts he doesn’t need right now, hates that Billy’s words even affected him like they did. He sits directly across from Steve, but he doesn’t miss that look in Billy’s eye, the one that showcases his true intentions if he were only allowed that in public.

Steve bristles and tells himself that as soon as he eats and they leave, Billy will be his again.

Still, Steve’s slightly apathetic, but it’s at a lot of things and not just towards Billy. He thought- well, he didn’t exactly know what he thought, but he hadn’t expected their road trip to last this long, and he sure as hell hadn’t expected to get into any arguments with Billy either. In fact, he hadn’t planned on them playing forerunner to the second half of summer, but to be fair, Steve hadn’t planned on doing anything with his time to begin with, not with the looming notion that he’d have to make a choice about his future and soon because his father wasn’t the kind to give him an extension between choosing a college that would take him or finding a position within his father’s company. A simple nine-to-five job wasn’t so bad, Steve knew; it was respectable, and the benefits were good as got, but neither option appealed to the likes of Steve who didn’t know enough about the world or himself to make that kind of permanent decision.

At least, not as appealing nor as permanent as Billy’s offer had been when he’d asked Steve if he’d join him.

“You say what you mean,” he says, and it’s a quality that Steve, in any other circumstance, respects because Billy’s brash, and sometimes he doesn’t think before speaking, but at least he has the room to speak from his heart while learning to tame the bite of anger that’d held him hostage for so long. “And I appreciate that,” and he flicks his gaze to the other side of the building, over Billy’s shoulder where he spots a waitress on shift smacking gum, pulling out two menus that will surely end up at their table, “but you know why I did it, and more importantly, why I was waiting to tell you.”

Billy doesn’t look hurt, not anymore, but he does look a cross between wanting to be pissed and calm understanding. “So, you were going to tell me, then?” he asks resolutely, the vulnerability creeping into the tone of his voice.

It makes Steve’s gaze flicker back to Billy’s, the boy slouched in his seat very much like he was in the car, with one arm across the back of the booth, brow pinched like he’s gauging whether Steve’s fucking with him or not. The confusion itself is adorable, but Steve keeps that to himself, resolves that if he hadn’t known who Billy was, this would certainly be a sight to behold and how it’s about to become one as soon as he hears the clacking of shoes approaching.

Steve knows the setting is a disaster in the making, bites his tongue at the notion of jealously playing into the fine strings they’ve already pulled. Billy’s never been one to hide his shame, least of all when he gets what he wants with a thinly-veiled smirk, leaving Steve’s jaw clenched and mildly resentful in which Billy’s motions roll over from vulnerable to smooth.

Steve’s never held an ounce of it in his life, Kings Steve moniker be damned.

“Anything to drink?” the waitress asks as she finally appears. She looks bored, absolutely dull until she eyes Billy, and Steve rolls his eyes the moment the tension dissipates into something too charged for his liking.

“I’ll ha-”

Steve kicks Billy’s ankle, effectively shutting him up as he politely addresses the woman. “We’ll have water. Thanks.��

She looks between them, probably feels the awkward subtlety that makes itself known as neither Steve nor Billy add another word to the request. Luckily, and as Steve keeps smiling, she leaves the menus and trails off behind the counter to grab their drinks.

“Listen, I don’t know what the fuck crawled up your-”

“We’ve lived on caffeinated beverages for nearly a week now,” Steve insists, voice harsh against the backdrop of relative quiet. He’s not angry, per se, just annoyed about a lot of things, and one of them is the lack of sleep that pulls shades of purple and blue and heavy under his eyes. He’s sure if he found a mirrored surface, he’d notice the discoloration tethering him to the discontent that suddenly hits him twice fold. He doesn’t want to be here, and he doesn’t feel like arguing anymore. What he wants is food and a place of rest that isn’t a lowered seat in the car. “Do me a favor; humor me.”

Billy breathes deeply, agitation painted clearly across his brow, so different from the smile he’d given the woman who took only half their order. The cocky demeanor loses itself the longer they sit in silence, the longer the subject of their animosity remains unresolved. Billy turns his attention to the menu like he hasn’t seen the exact same offerings everywhere else, and suddenly, Steve feels bad, the curve of Billy’s shoulders falling as he keeps to himself. It’s so unlike him that Steve reaches out, hesitantly scanning their surroundings before brushing his pinky across the back of Billy’s hand. “I’m sorry.”

It’s weighted, that word. Not just for his behavior but for the incident at large. It makes Billy sigh, finger twitching underneath Steve’s touch. He doesn’t pull away nor swat at Steve like he’d once done back in Hawkins when Steve attempted affection under the harsh lights and scrutinizing townsfolk that would’ve surely called their bluff.

“For treating me like a child?” Billy proposes, but just like Steve, his tone is cracked with unrest.

With his free hand, Steve runs his fingers through his hair, attempting to pull the longer pieces away from his face. It hardly works, and he needs a trim, but that won’t happen ‘til they get where they’re going. So, the best thing he can do is let his hair do what it wants while he attempts to fix what he’s broken. The thought of them snipping at one another for another few days leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. “For that and the other thing.”

Billy finally looks up at Steve through his lashes, fanned out and dark across the skin below his eyebrows. It startles Steve sometimes just how breathtakingly beautiful Billy is when he’s free of annoyance, of any lingering emotions that hardens his gaze, his body, and more importantly, his heart. Steve may not always recognize the plethora of emotions that crosses Billy’s eyes while they stare at one another, but he does identify that susceptibility in them and thinks how lucky, how lucky he is that Billy trusts him that deeply.

It’s not as if he doesn’t know he’s fucked up because Steve does, but it hits him again like freight train, and if he wants this fixed between them, it has to happen now. Not later, not tomorrow. Now. So, Steve pulls himself together, and he says, “I wasn’t trying to lie to you.” They may be on the cusp of adulthood, but neither of them are children, and if they’re going to make this work, then Steve has to get used to open and honesty as he’d begged Billy to be with him once before. “I knew you wouldn’t react,” he pauses, unsure of admitting what he really thinks; it’s not unlike Steve to have his own faults – he really is missing a screw or two – but under the concern of money, Billy’s never accepted the kindness when offered, “favorably.”

After the waver of confusion, Steve expects Billy to say something rigorous, always a smart mouth when he’s keyed up over whatever’s pissed him off. Instead, Steve glances down at their hands as Billy flips the script, releasing the menu and shifting so that Steve feels the brush of fingers against one of his knuckles. “You’re sure that’s it?”

A constricting chest is not what Steve had in mind in lieu of his many other emotions, but it seizes him anyway, that choked off feeling he gets when he wants to cry. Sometimes simple reassurances aren’t enough, but Steve hopes that maybe one day they’ll get there. “I didn’t take the money because I can’t live without it, Billy,” he says because that’s the truth. Sure, part of him knows he’ll feel stifled stress in a few months’ time when the money he’d procured from his father’s office, the green that’d ultimately landed in his duffle, runs dry. By then, it’ll be meager earnings from whatever source of income they procure as survival, but the notion hadn’t stopped Steve from saying yes to Billy. It still doesn’t make him backpedal, eager to return to Hawkins as soon as the Camaro rolls towards the nearest bus stop.

Steve’s lived with money all his life, never had to want for naught, and the differences between him and Billy are as wide as the Grand Canyon, but Steve also knew just how easily he could, and did, give it up for something he knew was so much better. Billy hadn’t made him any promises, and Steve didn’t expect them. The road ahead had always been bumpy, but Steve knew he had the ability to make it a little less so. “I took it because I knew you didn’t have a plan. Not a full one anyway.”

Which is the truth of the matter. The thick bruises around Billy’s collar bones are proof enough of that; same as the deep cut across his shoulder, the desperation in his eyes when he’d knocked on Steve’s door at eleven in the morning with nothing more than his car and a packed bag. “My parents won’t miss it,” he continues, and that may or may not be the truth either. Steve’s sure they’ll notice, hopes they’ll find the note he left because at least he had the decency not to let them believe he’d disappeared without a trace.

But aside from that, they’ll think him ungrateful, at the very least, where he’ll call back home and talk to his mother, set the record straight that he’s doing what he should’ve done ages ago. His father will be angry; he’s sure of it, but his mother will forgive him and ask him to visit when he can. “I’d rather be prepared so we’re not sleeping in another shitty motel, or god forbid, your cramped car,” he says, and he swears he sees a grimace on Billy’s face, though brisk as it may be. “We’ll have enough for a place, a roof over our head until we can figure out what to do.”

The clacking of heels follows Steve’s admission, giving him enough time to retract his hand, sitting back in his seat while Billy bites his lower lip in contemplation. Two glasses of water, filled to the brim with ice, are placed before them, and when the waitress asks if they’re ready to order, Steve gives her a gentle smile this time, lacking force and hostility he hadn’t really meant before. She seems to take it in kind, smiling back as she stuffs her hands into the pockets of her apron.

“Eggs and bacon,” Steve says, going on to add, “for the both of us. Thank you.”

And when she leaves, Steve trails his finger through the condensation melting off his glass, giving Billy time to rove through Steve’s words like he might find fault with them. Before, when he’d found the money, he’d hardly given Steve the chance to explain, nostrils flared and color filling his cheeks when he’d asked what the fuck is this, Steve?

“I wasn’t thinking when I told you I was leaving,” Billy eventually says, catching Steve’s attention. He’s not looking at him, though, as he confesses his errors, staring out of the window at the lull of the highway just off in the distance. There’s only a few cars that pass given they’re in the middle of practically nowhere, but some roll on by, eighteen wheelers on their heels. “But it was better than the alternative.”

The alternative sends a shiver up Steve’s spine, knows for a fact that Billy has difficulty expressing the intricacies of his home life, or what it once was. Previously, an utterance made bold through liquid courage had been enough for the both of them, for Steve to understand the implications and that bruises in the shape of fingers aren’t just earned; they’re given out freely under every pretense imaginable. False ones included.

“I don’t fault you for that,” Steve says solemnly, hopes that Billy doesn’t regret the decision he’d made by asking Steve to come with him because he doesn’t regret following. Despite their cramped conditions, the long drives, and whatever station they sparsely transmit through the radio, leaving Hawkins without looking back has provided Steve with a new sense of self, an undercurrent of freedom and excitement that his hometown had never given him before.

It’s like he can properly breathe for the first time, and Steve knows that Billy feels the same way, too.

“That’s what I do, Steve, what I’ve always done.” Billy shrugs, the click of his tongue on the heel of sarcasm, a retrospective look of near defeat as he forgoes their usual address for something more meaningful. Like Billy’s purposefully tapping into the ether of his heart, wants Steve to understand the desperation that sent him on a voyage back to the only place he could ever call home. “I figure shit out.”

It makes sense, the life of one Billy Hargrove akin to a tornado that stirs up as much trouble as it finds him. Steve can’t imagine the lack of stability, of having to navigate the floorboards and delicacies of words. But Steve also understands Billy’s point, that having resorted to a weighted lightness has only left him in a peculiar spot, the drive amid instinct and survival. No plans had been made with a knock against wood, and somewhere, hope always existed because Billy’s always been savvy on his own.

On his own. By himself.

Steve sucks in a breath, sharp and meant to draw Billy back to him, and it works. Billy’s blue, blue eyes, illuminated by the sun through the window, rest upon Steve in a heartbeat. Briefly, he wonders what Billy sees, how Steve looks in day old clothes, hair free of any product aside from water and the small bottles of shampoo and conditioner they’re gifted every night. It hardly matters, though, Steve leaving behind someone he used to be, someone he used to know, and surely, the same can be said for Billy.

“Not anymore,” he says, resilient in nature as he pushes the point that loneliness will haunt no further. The apologies, and whatever else he’d planned on saying, drift into the air like floating feathers, catching Billy by surprise and belatedly, with understanding.

It takes a moment, but only that, for Billy’s resolve – the one he’d always had buried beneath as a contingency - to smother itself into fragmented pieces. Steve watches as it cracks and bleeds, the fine lines between Billy’s brow, and the ones near the corner of his mouth, smooth away.

For the first time, Steve thinks this is truly a new beginning.

It takes the serving of their food for the spell to break, but even then, Steve feels whatever unspoken conclusion they’ve come to just underneath his skin, buzzing with delight and warmth.

And it’s not until they’ve cleaned their plates, Steve pulling out a few bills to pay for their meal, that Billy eyes him, the check, and the moment the waitress carries it all away.

“Not anymore,” he says quietly, and this time, Steve knows Billy believes it.

#harringrove #x

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survivorcordillerablanca · 7 years ago

Text

Episode 2 Confessionals

who is bryce and how long has he been on this tribe

so my daughter emma left and im the only one who stood by her side. i still have lexi on my side. hopefully adam, jordan pines (shocking) and jay. im mostly working with jordan and jay bcuz they might know lexi and i are friends. considering i was in the india reuinon chat and kicked from it on and off for weeks. also katie is in this game and i know she's bffls with adam, so i wanna work with him to keep that door open. and katie is also bffs with jordan so ILL GIVE THAT LITTLE PINES BOY A CHANCE

Me forgetting to make a confessional doesn't surprise me. Anyway I got an advantage from the wishing well thing and I'm shook that it worked to get half the tribe on call

I think I made a pretty good connection with Chris, especially based on the fact that we are in 2 orgs together. I would like to align with one more person and make it an alliance of 3, so when I get the chance to talk to Chris, that could hopefully be set up. I want to be a bit more straightforward with my goals in this org unlike in some of the previous ones I have played recently. I've been waiting for someone to come to me but maybe if I go to a couple people, they will respect and trust me more because I want to align with them. It worked well with Chris. Also everyone listen to this goddess sing:

youtube

So, usually i don't make confessionals, because thats lame, but my boy RTP needs them. So what can I say, I'm a giver. Anyways round 1 is fine. I have a few different alliances, each sort of mixing with the other. I got a 1 on 1 of me and adam. I got a 3 person one of me Luke and Jay. And I think I am working with Ryan and Willa. Separately of course. Anyways i'm not too worried about going home. I just hope we win shit soon.

Okay fake friends!! No one though to inform me about the idol map thing JKDSFJK. I don't even quiet get it AAAAAAAA. I searched somewhere but don't think I got a response so I think I'm wrong. Also we won the first challenge yay!! I'm really scared to go to tribal b/c I don't think I'm in a majority. I want to make an alliance with like carson, charlotte, zachary, katie but I think its too soon??? But that's what people who wait to long say so idk SDDSHFSf. Taylor Swift's new song came out earlier and its so good. Its also everywhere??? Like on so many promotional things and ads shes really getting her business. The reward challenge is usually something I'd like but I finally fixed my sleeping schedule and its about to get ruined again probably. I'm so tired but I want to win. The wishing well is also strange. I didn't get chosen this time and no one told me they did either so yikes :s! Here's hoping things look less grim.

okay i really like carson. he's really fun and probably the person im closest with. I want to work with as well, Willow. she's a queen! WOO ill make a longer one soon i promise

Congrats to me for not being the first boot. That'll have to do for my first confessional I'll do a real one later Ryan please don't yell at me.

I GET SLEEP YES. Sad I didn't get it but tbh idc. I am SO tired and now I don't have to stay up. Gonna finis the Great British Bake Off episode I'm on and them I'll be counting sheep! Hope my tribe wins <3

I dreamed a dream that I searched for the idol apparently. BECAUSE I DIDN'T ACTUALLY DSFJKSFKJFK. I don't understand why I'm like this but I'm cracking up and apparently imagining I searched Churup HSFJKDFsKJF

Just occured to me that hosts see these live not at the end of the season so now I'm extra embarrassed SJDKFS

I love how we're doing every challenge I hate!!! We won reward tho and got another shot at the wishing well but I didn't find anything again lol. I am stressed for this challenge but hope their teams just like talks or something and gets kicked.

heyyyy im back! after we won immunity (bless), i kinda just.. .stopped talking to ppl but everyone else stopped talking so its fine and idc! emma got voted out and im PRETTY sure i dont know them so idc. i know willa so im happy they stayed over emma. then came the reward, where ryan slung a ball we had to catch it to open treasure chests, and we dominated ! (well not we, but the rest of my tribe), they got 4/6 balls and charlotte managed to open the chest so we won reward and a visit to the wishing well! at the wishing well, i chose #9 bc... it SPOKE to me, and... [9:15:58 AM] Ryan Palmer: Congratulations! You have earned yourself a task from the well. Once you complete this task to the hosts appeasement you may earn a special reward. This task may put you at risk if you complete it so make sure to cover all of your bases. The next Immunity Challenge will be one where you have to earn points as individuals for your tribe. Your task is to make sure you do not earn any points for your tribe, you must earn 0 points. In addition to that there will be a rule about talking in the chat, right after your tribe has earned points you need to post a comment of celebration in the chat. You may write whatever you want, but you will then be removed from the chat. If you complete this task during the Immunity Challenge then you will earn a special reward. If you do not complete this task you will earn nothing. [9:16:02 AM] carson: SDJKSDJKSDJKSDJK [9:16:11 AM] carson: Me being one of the onl;y people to not do anything during the Reward [9:16:12 AM] carson: BYE [9:16:34 AM] carson: Also Ryan ur giving me All Stars teas.... [9:16:37 AM] carson: *cvc [9:16:40 AM] carson: I literally [9:16:43 AM] carson: SFJKSDKSDJK GOD I HATE THISSSS [9:16:47 AM] Ryan Palmer: :) [9:16:52 AM] carson: THis is literally the Same as CvC SO i HAVE AN ADVANTAGE CLUE... and the challenge is one of the task challenges and these are my favorite types of challenges and im rlly mad i dont get to play!!! this reward BETTER be good... (also me not helping in the challenge, but still getting the reward sdlsks) and im having flashbacks from failing this kinda clue in challengers vs champions, so i wanna redeem myself and get the advantage! im still gonna try and fake like im doing it, by answering questions wrong etc, but then ill randomly celebrate in the wrong chat accidentally (while we'rei n the lead bc im not gonna try and lose this SDjksdkj) !! hopefully it goes well and im not exposed and we dont lose immunity. also, nor eal updates on this tribe. chris barely talks which im assuming is bc hes busy but still!!! idk who to work with, so i guess ill wait for a tribal?? kinda wanna get an alliance together soon though idk

Im gonna be bomb at this comp n here is why eg. Q: who won Bahamas? A: *me in 0.2sec* Zach won Bahamas!!!! Yes I submitted this as a VLconf too don't @me...

I'm good at puzzles??? But I'm not I guess DSFKJSF

My ADD made it almost impossible to keep up with this high speed challenge so I kept /leave on my message box the whole time hoping it would become an option to get points... man I'm a smarty pants and also now I get to sleep!

I am so stressed for tribal. I think I have something good with Carson and Zachary but I still need two votes hopefully Willow and Charlotte vote with me and we can do Eric or Chris. Chris doesn't respond to my messages ever so I'd prefer to do that honestly but idk I am just hoping it works out

Willow told me she heard Chris's name and im like "HELLL NAW IM NOT VOTING CHRIS BAI." I need Willow, and I need Chris, and there is no way either of us 3 are going to go this tribal.

So I talked to Willow and she's like "my two top allies blah blah blah. Anonymous blah blah blah" and I'm thinking to myself, "Why would you tell me that someone other than me is your top ally. You could of had me sold if you said I was your only top ally." Now I know there is someone you might keep over me." And I have strong suspicions that her top ally that isn't me is 1 of these 3: Katie, Carson, Charlotte. Either way, I am going to remember what Willow said if we are ever in merge together and I need to think about saving her or someone else, especially if one of these suspicions are in merge with us.

SO WE WON IMMUNITY! Even without help from Jay, Lexi and Willa the rest of us killed the challenge and took home immunity. I'm so happy that we won immunity because Willa was looking like he'd be the next person to go and I kind of don't want that? I know it puts me in a pretty precarious spot with my alliance since they agreed it's probably best if Willa leaves next. If I can't save Willa at all then I'll vote him out but if I can save him that would be GREAT for me. I want to get closer to Ryan and Adam. Adam and I talked during the first tribal council and we're both pretty straight forward thinkers and know what's best for the tribe so I'm interested with working with him. Ryan is someone who I really want to work with and he's close with Lexi which means I might have to vote her out so that he'll fully trust me?? Idk we'll see. I've been thinking about what Ulta will do at tribal because if a winner from that tribe ends up leaving and then we swap and I end up on an Ulta dominated tribe...that's bad news for me.

So I think I'll get at least one vote here. But I feel good with my alliance that they'll have my back. I trust carson the most, then charlotte, then zachary, but I trust them all so that's good. I think Willow and Eric are together but I don't think they'll be able to get chris and Katie on their side. Willow wanting chris is also pretty bad so idk I think I'm safe at least I hope so cuz I'm really starting to enjoy the cast and season!! Should be a 7-1 or 6-2 or 6-1-1 vote hopefully and then 4-4 at worst

we;ll.... we lost badly!! AND I DIDNT GET MY REWARD FROM WISHING WELL BC WE FLOPPED TOO MUCH... but that dont matter, tribals more important, and chris was the plan to go... UNTIL!!! today, eric told chris that chris was going and if he wanted to stay to vote out bryce. like??? What kinda crackedt world do you live in where u threaten someone to vote someone so they can stay SDJHDSJ (also returnee alliance made between me/zach/charlotte/bryce YES.) so... chris snitched (king) eric out and so we want eric out now... bc hes playing way too hard. NOW HE WANTS TO VOTE CHARLOTTE OUT TOO WHICH>>> SDKJSDKJ. i see why he went premerge so many times right now. like... if you try something over and over, and it doesn't work. take another LOOK!! but whatever i could be getting bamboozled but the plan is to get out eric bc he blew up his game by scrambling with little numbers, and withholding info (like telling bryce that he should vote charlotte and he couldnt tell him why but hed give him 3 rounds of safety DSJKSJK...) hopefully im not being dumb and im actually right. (also im actually... strategizing and forming social bonds oh wow! survivor is actually fun when you play it.) lets pray for no blindside of me or anyone... and lets get through this! http://photos.costume-works.com/full/furby.jpg

i just heard carsons voice on live tribal council and like i knew he was in high school but omg he sounds like such a smol baby and i need to protect him

#NotAGameForLapdogs

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