#no actually it’s not official sorry for trolling you

[fangirlingpuggle]

A very very dumb Apothecary diaries AU where Lakan checks in on Fengxian before he leaves finds out she's pregnant. She can't go with him or marry him yet but instead while he goes abroad to study she stays with Luomen helping him set up pharmacy after he's cast out from his family.

She and Lakan stay in regular contact through letters, both of them gushing over letters only for someone top look over their shoulders and see letter is only a move in go They're playing long distance each letter is just the next move. At least until Maomao is born the Fengxian includes scribble drawings Maomao does or hand prints...Lakan office and room are full all walls covered in them.

The two reunite and although they live with La clan and Lakan gets headship but they still visit Luoman and the visit Verdigris house (Madame still hastes Lakan but they send good business recommending them to high ranking officials). So Maomao still has her big sisters and still learns about medicine and poison from Luomen.

She still tests on herself , Lakan freaks out but Fengxian trusts her daughter just makes sure they have plenty of antivenom and antidotes ( Basically every room in the LA family state has an emergency draw for if Maomao has had poison again)

Maomao doesn't get kidnapped, she ends up in rear palace because consort Ah-Dou she can see that Lishu is struggling she can't intervene or protect her within her own court so she contacts Fenxian who she's met at functions other the years.

Ah-Dou- Fengxian you have a daughter correct. Is she as terrifying as you?

Fenxian: Of course

Ah-Dou: May I please request a favor?

Maomao enters Lishu's court not as a noble but as a lady in waiting (and the food tester, it's how she agreed to it)

Maomao: Do I really need to go into court I want to make medicine

Fengxian: You will be testing food for poison

Maomao:....deal

She of course see's the bullying in the court and instantly Nopes, she does totally overhaul terrifying Lishu's ladies in waiting and getting rid of them, she spends time around other servants and ends up recruiting other servants as new ladies in waiting ones who will actually care for and protect Lishu. Full big sister Maomao mode with Lishu.

She keeps an eye on other departments dressing as a maid while moving around to avoid suspicion and still see's the confrontation between Gyokuyo and Lishu and sends the messages with torn dress (She didn't get chance to change and couldn't go into their pavilions in her lady in waiting clothes)

She gets dragged in the room with other maids also, she kinda gets stuck and pulled in and meets Gyokuyo having to admit so sorry can't be your lady in waiting already Lishu's. Jinshi suddenly puts together about the totally change in ladies in waiting and promotion of other servants. Jinshi is very curious but Maomao is able to divert attention.

Gyokuyo still wants to see Maomao and so she moves between both her and Lishu and gets Lishu to spend more time with Gyokuyo the two getting along well.

She also helps Lihua as before and then she is basically going between 3 of them and the 3 consorts spend time together... Lihua and Gyokuyo figure out who Moamao is but they're not saying they want to keep Maomao around and also they are all shipping Jinmao and enjoying watching this soap opera.

The banquet happens but Maomao is of course Lishu's food tester not Gyokuyo's but none of the old ladies in waiting are there to bully Lishu and swap bowls so Moamao still gets poison. (She 100% tried to get to test food for all 3 consorts ... they didn't let her)

Lakan still trolls Jinshi because he's seen letters Ah-Dou and others sent Fengxian keeping her updated and is suspicious about Jinshi and his precious daughter. (Fengxian and Jinshi are planning the wedding already)

When Maomao is still dismissed after the poisoning is revealed and Jinshi is super upset and sulky until fancy banquet and high ranking personnel and then sees Maomao again as daughter of head of La clan...

Maomao: I suppose you are upset than I hide my identity

Jinshi:...

Jinshi:Yes very upset (he says hypothetically ignoring looks he is getting form the emperor and Gaoshun)

She still comes back to rear place (The consorts missed her so much... plus they have a betting pool... a lot of people are in it Fengxian has a board plotting moves so the 2 get together when she's bet...while Lakan is pouting in corner that no one deserves their baby girl)

(Light Novel spoilers

Lahan is raised as Maomao's brother and adores his sister, the two are chaos gremlins her making medicines and him plotting how to self and market them

He is also adored by Verdegris house the beloved little brother... also everyone is pretty sure he and Maomao are twins they know there was only 1 baby but... they're sure the 2 are siblings.

The madame also adores him both coming up with schemes for money and he happily does the accounting when they visit (they're sure he's her favorite)

When Jinshi sees them together before knowing they're related he thinks the 2 might be a couple, Gaoshun is face palming and despairing while the courtesans are losing it laughing)

[fure-dcmk]

the wording of the post is confusing by someone who is neither fluent in jp or english. aoyama never said himself that they got a love triangle

Rough translation

Interviewer: Is the highlight of this work (M14) the love triangle between Conan, Ran and Kid?

Aoyama: This time i drew a poster where Ran and Kid looks like they are about to kiss, but i got a fanletter that asked angrily "Are you sticking Kid and Ran together?" LOL. Ah- I really wanted to draw that last scene in the manga.

☝️the most this implies is he wants to draw a exact romcom scene m14 had. it never implied that Kid was being in anymore sincere with his approach

GOSHO WHAT THE FU-

[thewertsearch]

DAVE: wait has the juggalo troll been giving you guys fits like this or something DAVE: like this is a thing DAVE: like a pattern KARKAT: NICE GUESS SHIT HEAD! DAVE: oh man one of you has got to sit me down and tell me what actually happened here it all just sounds fuckin amazing in sort of the stupidest way possible

Dave, it's so much worse than you think.

Enjoy the next three years, dude. You'd better get really fucking good at recognizing the faint honking of a distant clown.

KARKAT: YEAH, HE DOES THIS KARKAT: HE SORT OF COLLECTS BODIES AND DECAPITATES THEM AND STUFF KARKAT: STICKS THEM IN BIG SCIENCE JARS, FOR SOME REASON?? KANAYA: Im Pretty Sure He Kisses Them Too Sometimes

Sorry, let me get this straight. You were fully aware of this behavior, but you still tried to form a quadrant with him?

Like... Karkat. The whole universe is telling you that this guy's a little beyond the help of your average moirail. If you want to do something for Gamzee, it's going to need to be a group effort - and if I were a betting gal, I'd guess that the Seers will be the key to his recovery, particularly Terezi.

KARKAT: YOU KNOW HOW EVERY NOW AND THEN YOUR LUSUS WILL BRING SOME RANDOM ASS DEAD ANIMAL BACK TO YOUR HIVE FOR NO FUCKING REASON KARKAT: AND THEY DON'T EVER STOP DOING THAT NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU YELL KARKAT: IT'S LIKE THAT, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN DAVE: not really DAVE: oh wait DAVE: against all odds i sorta do DAVE: mine actually did do that once

This revelation is not even slightly inconsistent with the established personality of Bro 'Bigger Dirk' Strider.

DAVE: when i was really young DAVE: he made this stupid leather bib for me out of a goddamn horse […] ROSE: Was that the one you mentioned had a pink heart on it? DAVE: yeah […] ROSE: It's just that with the clarity afforded by my new abilities, it occurred to me just now that dead horse was likely the beautiful pet pony my mother gave me recently.

...alright, I don't have a clue how knowing about Maplehoof's death applies to Rose's Path to Victory ability. How does this help her achieve anyone's personal goal?

Maybe Rose obtained multiple Seer abilities upon ascension. After all, God Tier John has a bunch of Breath powers, so there's no reason why Rose should be restricted to one single Light ability, powerful as it is. Maybe this 'clarity' is another facet of Light, then, allowing Rose to see the connections between disparate pieces of information, and tie it all together, like a web of string on a Pepe Silvia evidence board.

DAVE: well shit DAVE: thats a hell of a mystery no one thought was a mystery and didnt even really need solving DAVE: but damn if it didnt just get solved so nice work

...holy shit.

Holy shit, this is the line!

Anyone who's used Tumblr in the last ten years has seen The Line - probably dozens of times, in dozens of different contexts. It's part of Tumblr's vernacular - and, up until this moment, it had completely slipped my mind that it was a Homestuck line.

Forget about Cascade, Act 6, or the comic's official halfway point. This is my greatest milestone as a Homestuck reader: learning that The Line is (and always was) about skinning a time-travelling pony.

[ayumigotabittoolonelyquitted]

Yuji itadori x tall reader head canons

♡ The moment Yuji lays eyes on you, it’s game over for him. You’re exactly his type tall, strong, blessed and he’s already imagining what your wedding photos would look like.

♡ He’s so confident when he confesses, too. Probably flashes you that goofy, boyish grin and says something like:

"Hey, I think you’re really cool. Wanna go out with me?"

And you? You look down at him (literally) and just go:

"Sorry, you’re too short."

Immediate psychological damage. Yuji.exe has stopped working.

He stands there, smiling on the outside but internally combusting.

"Too short? Too SHORT???"

But it gets worse. He asks, trying to salvage his pride:

"Then… what’s your type?"

And you, without hesitation:

"Todo."

MORTAL WOUND. DEATH. PAIN.

♡ Bro just got rejected and his best friend got praised in the same breath.

You walk away, completely unaware that you just shattered his entire ego.

Meanwhile, Yuji is standing there, staring at Todo from across the training field like a betrayed shonen protagonist.

♡ Cue maldative dreaming.

"so when I asked her out , she said I wasn't her type"

"I wish I was a little bit taller…"

"I wish I was a baller…"

"i wish I was 6 foot baller"

"I wish I had a girl , I'll call"

♡ He starts looking up height-enhancing exercises on Google. Hanging from bars, stretching his legs, drinking so much milk this man is on a mission.

♡ Considers asking Gojo if there’s a cursed technique that can make him taller.

At some point, Megumi just sighs and says:

"You’re never gonna be taller than Todo. Accept it."

Yuji refuses. He refuses.

♡ Starts wearing shoes with thick soles, hoping to gain even an inch.

♡ When you and Todo are sparring, and Todo lifts you effortlessly, Yuji is in the background dying inside.

♡ Eventually, he just stares at himself in the mirror like:

"Maybe she’ll fall for my personality instead… right?"

♡ Meanwhile, Todo has no idea any of this is happening. He’s just vibing, calling Yuji his besto friendo, completely oblivious to the emotional crisis happening next to him.

Wish granted

♡ After weeks of maldative dreaming, failed height-increasing attempts, and watching you simp for Todo, Yuji was ready to accept his fate.

But then, fate does him a solid.

♡Gojo sensei, in his infinite wisdom (or trolling tendencies), pairs you and Yuji as training partners for an entire month. (Fox he did that on purpose)

♡Yuji is initially like, “Oh god, this is gonna be painful.” He’s fully expecting you to talk about Todo 24/7 while he suffers in silence.

♡ But after a week of working together, he realizes something.

You’re actually… really cool.

Not just in a “wow, hot person” way but in a “holy shit, I really like talking to them” way.

You hype him up during training and laugh at his dumb jokes.

You don’t baby him you challenge him, push him to be stronger.

And when he actually manages to land a hit on you during sparring, you grin and say, “Damn, shortie’s fast.”

♡ Normally, the height comment would kill him. But… why is he blushing instead???

♡ Meanwhile, you? You were obsessed with Todo.

♡ But now? Yuji’s got you questioning everything.

♡ Like, why does his laugh make your chest feel weird?

♡ Why do you find yourself looking for him in a crowded room?

♡ And why, for the love of all things holy, do his stupid brown eyes make your heart race???

♡ Todo doesn’t even cross your mind anymore. Especially not when Yuji looks at you like that.

♡ It all officially clicks for both of you one night after an intense training session.

♡ You’re both exhausted, lying on the ground, staring at the sky. And out of nowhere, Yuji just mumbles:

“I don’t even care about being taller anymore… I just wanna be good enough for you.”

Your heart? Gone. Exploded.

You turn to face him, and without thinking, you say:

“You were always good enough, idiot.”

And then you kiss him.

Congratulations, Yuji. You may not have gotten taller…

But you got the girl.

This was inspired by this edit

AND THIS WAS REQUESTED IF U HAVE ABY REQUESTS PLESSE TELL.

[unhonouredone]

𝘍𝘐𝘟𝘐𝘕𝘎 𝘐𝘛 - Introductions: TOKYO

𝙢𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙞𝙥𝙡𝙚!𝙟𝙟𝙠 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙭 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙎𝙈𝘼𝙐

series masterlist

last part: KYOTO | next part: Chapter 1

Ah...yes the two very responsible and adult teachers at Tokyo Jujutsu High

(Well Geto is quite mature but we know he is quite the menace as well when he wants to be)

Nanami is not an official teacher but since he is Yuji's mentor, he was permitted and begged to be in the school group chat!

As we know Y/n ain't quite the fan of Gojo (hmm...nope still no clue why!) BUT he seems to be oblivious to the reasoning (as well as delusional to a point)

Everyone else knows tho

Nanami and Y/n were very close classmates and friends before Nanami left to live his normal life for a while. Y/n soon after left to Kyoto, but they have been keeping in touch! Perhaps this is a good opportunity to reconnect more since they'll soon both be looking after Yuji now, hm?

Geto and Y/n were never THAT close but still okay friends until things started escalating in the late 2000s (yk what)

Let's for now say that Geto owes a lot of gratitude to Y/n

Gojo tried to follow Y/n like 10+ times a day for some time but got blocked (he still thinks Y/n stalks his profile)

Nanami has an ig because Yuji pestered him long and hard! He only posted a picture of his favourite bakery. All the follows came from Yuji who had tagged Nanami's hand in a picture lol

Geto posts like once in a blue moon. All his followers are praying and manifesting for a proper selfie.

The Tokyo students aren't the biggest fans of their Kyoto counterparts BUT!! The second years swear up and down that their cool and quirky teacher is not bad at all!

Megumi actually is the only student who is allowed to follow Y/n because le gasp! They were pretty present when Gojo took Megumi and Tsumiki as his hosta- foster kids. Yeah lol Until 2011 of course (Y/n and Megumi meet up pretty frequently, but Megumi won't tell that to Gojo, or even Geto for that matter)

Yuji and Nobara are very excited to meet Y/n!! It's like their meeting an idol or a mystical being (Toge and Panda are really selling it)

Yuji, Megumi and Nobara all have matching pfps! Again we may see how persistent Yuji can be lol

Nobara would have much rather matched with Maki but alas...

Toge loves trolling😭 his account is mostly ironic content but sometimes he posts some genuine things

Panda got famous because people thought his account was a panda [species] fan account...

A/n: UGH sorry this took me longer than intended😭 BUT yesterday we finally wrapped up a huge 6 month project and I also held my presentation to show what I've learned during the last year (got the perfect score hahaha) Summer is almost here so I can focus on this story pretty well!!!＼(^_^)／ ANYWAY as you can see SUGURU IS HERE🙏 We will also be meeting more characters as we go and some of them might be surprising, others not! Hope you are hooked~

[commandershepardvasfuckit]

An Arranged Marriage, part 11

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10

M!troll x f!reader

2k words, sweet domestic fluff

There are definitely more differences between humans and trolls than you really realized, but at least half the fun is finding those differences.

(Also, ask box is always open, I am literally always vibrating out of my skin to talk about this man)

--------

The sunlight still streamed through the windows when you awoke, but now cast long shadows along the walls. Your head rested on Zen’jan’s chest while he laid on his back still asleep, one of his his arms wrapped around you and one of your legs tossed over his. It felt good just to be entwined like that, not worrying about how long you had been gone, or a cover story, or anything else.

You could not help but drag your fingers down his chest, feeling the divots of both muscle and scars. There was something nice about being able to just observe him him like this, to be able to get a good look at him without feeling self conscious as he watched you back.

Looking up at his face like this you were able to really take him in. His skin was smooth, not a trace of facial hair. His chest was the same and no hair at all and you could not help but reach over to run your fingers down his forearm out of curiosity, just to check. Sure enough, smooth as could be.

“Are you having fun?” he did not open his eyes, but you looked up to see him smiling.

You buried your face into his chest, embarrassed over being caught.

“You did not have to stop, it felt quite nice. I cannot say the last time I have just been able to relax like this and enjoy someone’s company” he pulled you little closer.

“Zen?” you asked, “Did you want an arranged marriage? Like was this something you expected?”

“No. An arranged marriage is not a normal thing here, nor was it something I wanted”.

“Oh” you felt a bit bad, you had not actually talked to him about any of this at all in the last month.

You grew up knowing one day you would have your marriage arranged for you, and it really was not a big deal, just what was expected. Most people you knew were in an arranged marriage after all, and maybe they grew to love their spouse and maybe they did not, but that was not important. What was important was that it kept you in a good societal status and you got to keep living your life of luxury.

“Was there someone in your life then? Before all this?” you asked.

“No. Nothing serious. I never made that sort of time, certainly not during the war and then after there was always too much to do with rebuilding”.

“But there was someone then?” you did not know why, but the thought of that was vaguely upsetting.

“No. Just sometimes enjoying a night with someone. But no, to answer your question I did not have anyone I was close to like that”.

“Have you ever?” you pushed.

“No, like I said, there was been a war going on since I was pretty young, I have never had time for such things”.

“But the war was only for the last few years”.

“Maybe for you, but your kingdom has been attacking my village and tribe and all the others here long before it was officially a war”.

“I had no idea, I didn’t know it was that bad” it gave you pause to realize there was probably to did not know about the war.

“There were attacks even before I was born, the larger raids started when I was 10 or so, and by the time I was 20 it was a full war for us even if it was not for you, then still nearly another 10 years to get peace. When I tell you that my whole life has been consumed by this war, I truly mean my whole life”.

“I’m… sorry” you did not know what else to say. The war had not really affected you. Nothing in your day to day life changed from it, the kingdom was never under attack as all the fighting took place here, even your father was never on the front lines.

“It is not your doing, but this is not something I really want to talk about. It had been my whole life, and now instead I would rather just enjoy laying here with you” he said and once more nuzzled the top of your head.

You felt bad bringing up the war, especially now knowing just how bad things had actually been. Desperate to change the topic you asked the first question that came to mind, “Do trolls not have body hair?” you blurted out

Zen’jan snorted, clearly caught off guard by the question, “If you mean ‘do I have hair besides on my head?’ no, that is it. I am not fuzzy all over like a human”.

“Fuzzy all over? I’m not covered in fur” you pouted.

“No, but humans are still fuzzy” for emphasis he rubbed your forearm.

“At least I don’t shed like you. Do you know how much of your hair I find everywhere? Sometimes I feel like you have fur instead of hair” you teased back.

“Those are the same thing” he insisted.

“No they aren’t! Hair doesn’t shed like how you do. Look at the pillow! It’s only been a few hours of napping and it’s already covered in your hair just from that!”

“Hair does that”.

“Not like that” you reached up to get a good handful of his hair, it was dense and you swore you felt an undercoat, and you gave a firm tug to prove your point and get a handful of shedding hair like you expected.

What you did not expect was Zen’jan’s reaction.

“Oh fuck” he moaned.

In the month you had lived together you had not heard him swear once, you were not even sure he knew any swears in common. That definitely settled it though.

You quickly released your grip on his hair, though at least he seemed equally embarrassed, his blushing turning his face a bit purple.

“I am… sorry about that. I suppose it has been a while for me” he let out an awkward laugh but would not look at you.

At this point you had somehow buried your face farther into his chest in an attempt to block out everything. Maybe if you did not acknowledge it then you could pretend that it did not happen or that the way he moaned got your heart racing with more than just embarrassment.

“I hope that since you feel comfortable pulling my hair that at least means you are not scared of me after everything” he broke the silence.

“I’m pretty sure you have fur” you mumbled into his chest.

“They are the same thing!”

“No they aren’t! Look at this!” you showed him the fistful of shedding strands that came out when you pulled his hair.

“Yes, hair does that”.

“No, it doesn’t! See?” you ran your fingers through your hair, only a loose strand or two came free.

“So? Some people shed more hair than others, that is normal. And hair and fur are words for the same thing”.

“They aren’t, and you’re shedding so badly anyways. You hair is absolutely everywhere”.

He sighed before speaking, “I know, it is hard to comb it all out by myself so it has been a while since I have really been able to get all the loose hair out”.

“I don’t mind helping, especially if it means not having your hair on ever surface in this house”.

“I was about to get up and get us some food, but maybe you could help me comb out the loose hair first?” he asked.

“Sure”.

He nuzzled the top of your head with his jaw before carefully rolling out from under you and retrieving a comb from the bathroom.

“So just comb it out?” you asked as he handed you the comb and sat down in front of the bed so you could reach his head.

“Yes, just keep combing until no more hair comes out”.

Shedding was an understatement. You started at his hairline and combed and combed out a seemingly endless amount of hair just in that one section.

“You absolutely have an undercoat in your hair, I’m just saying” you remarked.

“Many people have a second layer” his eyes were closed and he was leaning his head back on your lap, he looked so relaxed, you even heard his soft purring sound.

“Not humans, that’s not a thing for us”.

“Really? Weird”.

“How often are you supposed to this?”

“Once a week or so”.

“And when was the last time you did?”

He stayed silent.

“Zen, when was the last time you combed out all this hair?” you asked again.

“A few months” he admitted.

“A few months?!”

“It is hard to do on my own, and it is hard to see what I am doing”.

“Couldn’t you have asked Bira or Ba’tual for help?”

“I did sometimes, but they are both busy a lot and I did not want to be an inconvenience”.

“Well, just remind me, I don’t mind doing this for you” you scratched the top of his head where you had finished combing out all the shedding.

He leaned his head to the side and nuzzled against your leg, “Thank you”.

“The nuzzling” you began, “I thought that was just a rut thing”

“The jaw and cheek nuzzling mostly is, but it is all just affection anyway. Do humans not show affection?” he teased.

“We do! Just not like that”.

“Then what do humans do?”

You leaned forward and kissed his forehead and pulled away to see him smirking.

“You tricked me” you said.

“I did not trick you, you did that all on your own” he was still smirking.

“But you knew I’d probably kiss you”.

“I was hoping you would, but you still chose to do it”.

“Do trolls not kiss?” you asked.

“Tusks" and he tapped one of his for emphasis, "They do make being face to face difficult, so no, kissing is not a thing we really do. Some people picked up on it from the orcs and might kiss their spouse’s hand or top of their head, but otherwise no”.

“You press your forehead to mine, isn’t that hard if both people have tusks anyways?”

“It is, and since everyone’s tusks are different it means that with a new partner you have to really get used to what angle to hold you head at to do it, that is why it is very intimate. Exactly how it is done is different for every couple, you have to take the time to learn your partner”.

You blushed at the implications, you had been taking it as just a small gesture and had been returning it without a thought. It reality it was deeply intimate and something unique to everyone.

“Well, in that case, you’ve been awfully affectionate since we’ve gotten home” you remarked.

“Can you blame me? I spent a month on edge around you and sleeping on the floor assuming you either were scared of me or hated me and did not want to be here. But now when given the option to leave you still chose to stay. You let me carry you home, you asked me to be close to you so you could sleep and then cuddled up to me, I woke up with you on my chest, and you offered to comb out my hair. I have never had someone in my life in this way, and it feels good and I do not know how else to show that I am happy about it”.

He was looking up at you, head nearly upside down from how far he was leaning back in your lap, vivid green eyes darting across you face and gauging your reaction.

“I know what you mean” it was a new feeling, and weird, but good. You were allowed to be affectionate for once, allowed to get attached for the first time, not just a quick fling for fun with no feelings involved. “and it’s all pretty new for me too”.

You leaned down somewhat awkwardly and pressed your forehead to his. There was quite a bit you were still concerned about, but at least you knew your husband was a good man.

Part 12

[sgiandubh]

What Anons are worth

It turns out I was right to bet:

Since this is now official, there we go. Along with my deepest apologies for posting it (obviously) too soon and taking it down. For obvious reasons that have to do with integrity, ethics and empathy. As some of you already know and immediately cooperated, erasing their reblogs on the spot, once I gently asked them: a BIG thank you to both of you, for we are better than that.

I think it's important to insist on the simple factoid the bar takeover on April 8th is not related to the above fan-oriented event, hosted by The Gin Company's Edinburgh store. That bar takeover is part of an industry-only event, The Edinburgh Bar Show. To be part of it, you will need a trade-only pass, so no dice:

[Source: https://www.edinburghbarshow.co.uk/whats-on]

This is the info I posted way back then, only to immediately take it down - sorry to the friend who tipped me: mulțumesc mult, scumpa, știu că ai priceput imediat situația 💖. And here, on this page, is probably where a certain troll 'already saw' it - evidence I live rent-free in her brain. But then, she (or one of her minions) could not resist:

Well, darlings, it was a scoop, after all. Eat crow, seriously. But, what the heck, while we're at it: thank you - this is what tipped the balance and made me silence you. I should have done this a long time ago.

Of course, fantasy is rife across the street. That is exactly what Anon and that freak are worth:

PS: And yes - they will turn you back from the bar's door, even with a pass. I wonder, which part of ' EBS is a trade-only event for the bar community", don't they understand?

Instigating fans to go where they are not welcome. Hmph. Classless, shameful, futile.

[Later edit]: Making sure where people are actually welcome and expected to show up :

[june-egbert-official]

I have begun reading Homestuck as of late (currently at the start of Act 5), and even without knowing of June's gender, I doubt I've ever met a bigger egg case. She rules. I also love how wrapped up she is in her own beliefs and assertions, like some kind of strange armour.

Aside from June, which characters do you like the most? And narratively speaking, what are some of your favorite things about HS?

I personally love Rose, Jade, and Terezei so far. ESPECIALLY Rose. And I like how all of the human kids - can't speak for the trolls yet - are kind of aware that their beliefs aren't as ironclad as they imagine (June's dad and Rose's mom aren't actually waging a psychological war against their children, Dave seems like he wouldn't know who he was without idolizing his brother and wrapping himself up in irony, and Jade... Jade knows a lot, and I feel like sometimes she purposefully pretends to forget something, like her granddad being dead, because all that knowledge is a heavy weight), but none of them can admit it without their world shattering so they just cover their ears and go "LALALALA."

I'm sorry that this is a lot, but as the official June Egbert, I want to hear your thoughts, too :D

ooooh this is a nice meaty ask!

i LOVE vriska (ofc) but less obviously, i really like equius because even in the span of like...functionally, what, almost a month? like, the game itself was 600 hours (probably 612 for funny numbers) so maybe a month or so. and we see a LOT of growth in a very short time. he doesn't get GOOD, but like. for a 13 year old boy to go from "these people are beneath you and you must not associate with them" to "yea sure i'll build him some robot legs" is like. INSANE growth lmao. like it's not DONE (the kid died), but like...it's a start! as for the others, totally agree. all of the beta kids had this like. guardedness to them. rose portraying herself as a hyper intellectual psychotherapist to pretend her home life wasn't confusing and mundanely tragic, dave acting aloof and detached to hide that the abuse has turned him away from heroism as a concept, and jade playing the vapid airhead to avoid the tragic loss of her grandfather as a baby. and then the alpha kids feel a lot LESS guarded for the same reasons! like. roxy and dirk have no one to DIRECTLY teaching them shit so they both kind of emulate their long gone "guardians", but jane has so much privilege she doesn't NEED to guard anything. which brings us to jake who has watched too many action movies with blue women to properly accept that "hey maybe it's okay to be afraid of admit you can't do something". so in the same sense that the ironclad defense makes all the beta kids withdrawn, the alpha kids clash because of this openness, showing that either extreme can really fuck up your growth as a person!

[jessi4fanfics]

~Our New King~ (A Short Broppy Story)❤

I think you know what it's about already 😉

Branch stood at the base of the mushroom and laced back and forth.

He was worried. No, he was way more than worried. He couldn't think of a word to completely describe his insane emotions at the moment.

Branch was in a long leaf cape, a blue tux, and black pants. But his costume wasn't completed. Not yet.

Was he ready to complete his costume? This was an honest question. Did he want to go on with this decision. He didn't have to.

It wasn't that Branch didn't want to. He just didn't think it was something he would excel at. Heck, instead of being a help to Poppy, he might be a burden.

Was he ready to possibly become one of he didn't do this right?

"Ah, there's the future king!" A chuckle came from behind him, and he turned.

It was his brothers and Queen Barb of the Rock Trolls.

"It's about time you both got married, by gosh!" Barb scoffed. "And it'll be actually official after this coronation." 

"It's already official, Barb," Branch shrugged. "I just-- need to accept the extra duties that come with marrying the love of my life, that's all."

 Floyd smiled. "You make it sound like you want it to sound easy."

 Branch gave a nervous laugh.

 "Well, I've been waiting for you guys to tie the knot for years!!" Barb groaned.

 "I'm sorry we didn't go with your exact schedule, Barb," Branch replied sarcastically.

"I appreciate the apology," Barb smiled.

"Hey. You doing alright?" John Dory asked, nudging his baby bro.

"Yeah." Branch took a deep breath. "I think so."

"You are never gonna regret this decision, Bitty B," Bruce told him. "I know it."

Clay chuckled. "I'm just glad you're becoming king instead of me--"

 "Shut up!" The other brothers shouted at him.

Clay smirked and shrugged, and Branch rolled his eyes.

He knew he wouldn't regret the marriage part, but what about the crown part of it.

 "Where's my husband?!!" a sweet voice sang.

 Branch gave a sigh of relief as his new wife appeared and rushed to hug him.

 "Oh, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?" Branch breathed, smiling at her.

 "You look amazing, Branch!" Poppy giggled giddily. "But I have an accessory that will definitely improve those amazing looks of yours."

She pulled out a case and took a green crown with some brown leaves stuck to a green base at the bottom as well, and showed it to him.

 "What do you think? I wanted it to match your style a bit..." She seemed unsure.

 Branch smiled. "I love it. Thanks, Poppy."

She smiled happily again. Then she frowned. "You're stressed. Oh, Branch..."

 Branch waved it off. "I'm about to become king. Of course I have stress. Not that big of a deal."

 She watched him carefully. "Branch, honey, you don't have to do this. I can call of the coronation with one word, I promise. You don't need to become king to marry me if you don't want to."

 "But I-" he groaned, confused. He leaned towards her and said, "I want to. I'm just....nervous. I might mess it up. I don't want to disappoint you and the village. "

Poppy smiled again. "Branch... You are everything I could ever want in a husband. And everything the village could want a king. You love us all and take such good care of us. You are brave, sweet, and wonderful, and I love you. So so much." She wrapped her arms around him and squeezed. "You will make an amazing king."

 "You're sure?"

 "I'm sure. You don't have to-"

His brothers grinned at him as Branch shook his head.

 "No. No, I am going to do it. I trust your judgement." He pecked her cheek.

 "Good."  She beamed. "Because the ceremony starts now."

 Branch didn't know how he got up to the platform. He didn't know how long he stood there, listening to his wife's speech, and other people's as well.

All he knew was that all at once, Poppy grabbed his right hand and reached up with one hand and placed the crown on his head gently.

She kissed his nose and smiled sweetly at him, her whole face exploding with pride.

Branch grinned back. It was happening.

She lifted up his left hand now and he faced the crowd. In a loud voice she announced, "Branch, Our New King!"

 The cheers and hollers of happiness, especially from their families, could be heard from miles away. But Branch leaned in to kiss his wife, his Queen, and Poppy happily accepted.

The king of her country, but also the king of her heart.

This was what she had waited for and wanted ever since he said those words, "I love you, Queen Poppy."

 Branch himself had told her in general that wishing for stuff was useless.

Yet, here they were.

It was a short one, sorry! Wanted to go to bed, hahaha! Love y'all!❤

[homestuckreplay]

New Year, New Trolls

(page 1089-1099)

So far, every scene of Homestuck has taken place on John, Rose, Dave or Jade’s birthday. I’m also really excited that the Dave flashback we got a glimpse of on page 1073 is real and here, even if his city looks miserable in December. And page 1089 includes an absolute top tier line: ‘When [John] sees your staggering gesture of sentimentality he will finally understand. He will understand that in the game of facetious sentimental gestures, no one gets the best of Rose Lalonde.’

It’s also fun learning that both Rose and Dave have changed their desktop wallpapers recently! I’m delighted to know that Rose Lalonde’s previous wallpaper was the official art for the Call of Cthulhu card game – sorry, the Foretelling of Fluthlu card game – with a heavy purple filter applied. I believe this edition is from 2008 and Rose is definitely playing it. Meanwhile, Dave has chosen an officially licensed Starsky & Hutch wallpaper, released by Warner Bros. as promotional material before the movie’s 2004 release. Dave has removed the ‘In Theaters March 5’ but kept everything else identical. Ironically, I’m sure.

John’s Letters

John is the sweetest, and I wish he could see more of his own strengths and wasn’t dunking on his own drawings here. His letters are very different to how he communicates via Pesterchum – he’s expressing feelings towards his friends far more strongly here, and he’s also showing a deeper understanding of them than usual. It must be easier for him to express himself with that extra layer of distance, having time to think about his words and knowing that he won’t get a direct response.

John casually drops that Rose has been his friend ‘all these years’, so they’ve known each other since they were… 8 or 9, maybe? That’s a reasonable age to be on the internet and proficient with typing, and see each other as old friends by 12 or 13. I mean, they’ve probably been friends for 4 years and 13 days at the start of the story, so that fits.

John knowing what a wet T-shirt contest is feels pretty jarring, and totally came from whatever movie he watched the night before writing this. More obviously in character is John saying ‘they're totally authentic! they actually touched ben stiller's weird, sort of gaunt face at some point’ in his December letter to Dave, and then using the exact same phrasing via Pesterchum the following April - ‘you do realize they touched stiller's weird, sort of gaunt face at some point’ (p.110). It’s also extremely heartwarming that Dave immediately takes off the shades that match his brother’s and puts on the new ones he got from his best friend, and then never switches back. John says ‘i think you just gotta get out of your bro's shadow and spread your wings dude!!!’ and Dave actually listens. That’s a hard thing to do all at once, but a big first step, and it only happened because Dave had support from an actual cool person in his life.

Here’s the thing: John loves his friends. Jade’s visions and their importance suggest that a lot of Homestuck is about predestination, and that it’s possible that at least John and Jade’s meeting was fated or engineered. But even if all four kids only met because of something Jade saw in dreams, that doesn’t create love! They’re still the kids who put in the effort to connect despite all their differences and who go above and beyond to care for each other and show love on each other’s birthdays! At this point John knows nothing about any predestination, he just knows that these people mean a lot to him and he wants them to know that.

Act 3 began with a page titled ‘Dear John,’ (p.759), showing us Nanna’s message inside Colonel Sassacre’s tome, and now we’ve got ‘dear rose,’ (p.1091) and ‘dear dave,’ (p.1097), so I am calling it now that the final page of the act will be a Dear Jade.

grimAuxiliatrix

carcinoGeneticist was a very disappointing and uncreative troll when we met on page 859, but grimAuxiliatrix is a master at work, and their pesterlog with Rose is a joy to read. GA’s gambit of claiming to be an alien out of sync with Earth’s time and used to dealing with species of far superior intellect is hilarious, I would actively enjoy getting trolled by them, and of course Rose would be compelled enough by the game to accidentally in some way fall for it. The ‘beginning every word with a capital letter’ is a nice touch that does make them sound more alien. Rose and Dave’s banter is great but I feel like GA challenges Rose more than Dave does, and definitely has a more similar vocabulary. Describing time as ‘A Utility That A Universe May Resort To In Order To Advance A Desired Degree Of Complexity’ is interesting, and suggests the possibility of a universe that does not utilize time – the Incipisphere, perhaps?

It seems like Rose isn’t fully buying GA’s claim to have spoken to future Rose, but we know from her relationship with Jade that she’s not fully closed off to the supernatural, so I’m hoping this previous/next conversation comes around soon.

adiosToreador

While John and Jade’s instincts are to avoid messages from the trolls, Rose and Dave’s are to play the trolls at their own game. Dave and AT’s conversation is equal parts disgusting and disturbing and contains several phrases I wish I’d never read, and hope to never read again. But essentially they’re playing online gay chicken, and Dave is willing to take it much further. GA referred to a group that is ‘All Already In Agreement’, but they could be a leader of the group, and AT a more unwilling follower who doesn’t take to trolling so well. It seems like they’re going for a mix of CG’s aggression and GA’s wordiness and not really succeeding with either, and having this easy target for bullying brings out the worst in Dave, so I’m not on anyone’s side here. They’re both knowingly trying to upset each other, and I think it is believable that they would talk like this, but I don't want any part of it.

This is also, technically, the act’s title page – Dave drops the phrase ‘insane corkscrew haymakers’ towards the end of the page, in a context I don’t especially want to explore in depth. It’s a fun phrase out of context but I too would block Dave for some of the other stuff he says.

Troll Theories

It would be way too much of a coincidence if, in a story where some locations exist ‘untouched by the flow of time’ of others, these trolls were just regular people on Earth making this all up. I personally think the trolls are currently on the ominous planet, and are specifically trying to cause problems for these Sburb players. I’m not sure if they are part of the game – either a random rival group of players admitted to the same session, or a group of NPCs – or if they’re hackers who have infiltrated this session against the game’s wishes. If they are hackers, they could end up being technically ‘good’ if they’re working against Sburb itself, but will probably still have different goals to the kids.

If they’re planted by Sburb and there are twelve of them aligned with the ominous planet, and only four fighting on behalf of Prospit, this could explain why the forces of light are destined to lose. If that’s the case, the game has a social angle – if Rose can convince GA that it’s smarter to fight for the light, and if Dave can bully AT into doing the same, then John and Jade only need to sway one person each for an evenly matched, fair fight. I also think it’s possible that the Midnight Crew is four of these guys, although I don’t have any thoughts as to which, or to who the other eight would be.

> Dave: Break old sunglasses in annoyance.

[psychologeek]

I just think it’s wack that you only care about Israeli civilians. Yes their lives mattered. But instead of focusing on the real reason why they died, ie, the tremendously irresponsible government of Israel and their bloodthirsty colonialist mission, you focus on “”””antisemitism””””” where there really is none. I’m sure there’s like two (2) antisemitic pro Palestinians. The vast majority of us are normal people who want peace and freedom, and for Israel to stop killing people. And for Israeli innocents to stop dying too. Some of us are even Jews who finally woke up. Sincerely, a Jew who’s tired of colonisation being done in our name

So, I wasn't going to reply to this bc. LOL. Don't feed the troll.

But I'm currently hearing explosions in the background so I was like. Oh well.

Let's unpack it.

I just think it’s wack that you only care about Israeli civilians.

I mean. Y'know. אם אין אני לי מי לי? (Clearly not you).

Wow. I'm shocked. How dare I, an Israeli civilian with friends and family who happens to also be, by coincidence, Israeli civilians, dare care about such vile creatures? (Looking outside of the window) (Remember that I can't, bc it's blocked to prevent shattering by airwaves and sharpanels). Must be a day that ends with a y!

Yes their lives mattered.

I feel like there's a "but" coming.

But instead of focusing on the real reason why they died,

Are we still talking Israeli citisens? BC the current causes of death are missiles, gunshots and stabbing.

ie, the tremendously irresponsible government of Israel and their bloodthirsty colonialist mission,

Funny, you keep using that word. I don't think you know what that means.

Also, having strong opinion about a remote teritory which you aren't a citizen of? Tell me more about colonialism.

you focus on “”””antisemitism””””” where there really is none.

laughing out so hard I actually cry. Like, seriously?

Maybe you, personally, haven't met antisemism (or more likely, were unable to detact it). THAT WAS NOT THE CASE FOR THE VICE MAJORITY OF JEWS.

From vandalism and verbal harassment to physical harassment, beatdowns, and at least on one case - death.

[Funny enough, this article says "Alnaji’s and Kessler’s lives forever changed on Nov. 5 at a pro-Palestinian rally at Westlake and Thousand Oaks boulevards in Thousand Oaks." Well yes. Kessler's life ENDED. His poor killer may face prison. Poor man.

This is antisemic.]

I’m sure there’s like two (2) antisemitic pro Palestinians. The vast majority of us are normal people who want peace and freedom, and for Israel to stop killing people. And for Israeli innocents to stop dying too. Some of us are even Jews who finally woke up. Sincerely, a Jew who’s tired of colonisation being done in our name

Sorry, but if your "peace and freedom" refers to the myth of "The Happy Dhimi", you have a problem.

Some examples, though:

This is the official logo of the Houthis, the terror group pro-pals love so much. the "Curse upon the jews" REALLY gives some vibes of love and caring.

As someone who lived through the latest Intifada, this REALLY makes me feel safe out there:

So, the terror Organistion currently firing at me isn't a terrorist? do tell me more

And of course, the "resistence". Wow I wonder what happened on October 7th?

more (explained) #1, more #2, more #3, honestly just go to #antisemitism here.

And, last but not least:

INDIGENOUS PEOPLE CANNOT BE COLONIALS IN THEIR ANCESTORS' LAND.

WE HAVE 3,000 YEARS OF HISTORY HERE.

But, well, I guess you're from america. Strange how you don't care about colonialism when it's actually. Y'know. BY-THE-BOOK.

~

Another case of kidnaps by terror organisation (Boko Haram). And another (ISIS) (Hamas connection).

[chemical-underreaction]

dirk <3< reader dirk <3< reader dirk <3< reader PLEASE

sure thing!! <3 sorry if this wasn't exactly what you wanted, but i had a lot of fun writing this!!

DIRK STRIDER X READER (PITCH) HEADCANONS (*´∇`)┌θ☆(ﾉ>_<)ﾉ

alright, let's be clear. dirk strider does *not* hate many things. he dislikes things, of course. he dislikes a lot of things.

but hate? hating things is too emotionally vulnerable for his tastes.

oh, but you?

he can make some exceptions for you.

you are a special, particular kind of pain in his ass.

there's two very different reasons why (i think) dirk would hate someone.

either they, as a person are in entirely direct conflict with him and get on his nerves in a major way - or, they're way too similar to him, and dirk does not like getting a mirror to his own behavior.

so more than likely, you'd fit into one of those two categories. i don't know you, though.

but regardless of what it is, you probably wouldn't have known for a while.

he didn't treat you.. differently? per say?

he was cold and cryptic and strange to everyone.

but with you, it seemed different. everyone told you it was just in your head. that dirk didn't have a problem with you, he was just like that.

but it was not.

dirk took so much pleasure in confusing you, getting one over on you. playing his little mind games.

granted, he is just kind of like that, but it's different. it was a lot more targeted, pointed - it wasn't purely in jest.

but, more importantly, it wasn't onesided.

you were not just a passive actor in this, oh no.

whatever you did, it was equally targeted to get on his nerves as much as possible.

there came a point where both of you, just for the sake of your fucked up little game, knew more about each other than even your mutual best friends did.

you'd torment each other with things, but you'd never bring anyone else into it or tell anyone things only the two of you knew. there was something of a code of honor. a trust fall system.

despite how much you disliked each other, you'd never actually do tangible harm to each other.

you just engaged in a prolonged battle of psychological warfare over your chat client.

eventually, it gets.. bizarrely flirtatious. not in a traditional way, no, but in a way that was still undeniably flirting.

you still hated him. he still hated you.

it continued regardless.

you two never.. officially got into a pitch relationship.

you're both human, after all. how would you know?

however, eventually, you were informed that your relationship with dirk sounded a whole hell of a lot like blackrom.

so, of course, you approach him about it.

neither of you know *enough* about quadrants to really call it.

but all the trolls have just been assuming it anyways, so you just shrug. by now, it's calling it what it is.

you and dirk have the mutual respect necessary for blackrom. and the mutual attraction.

needless to say, you have the "hate" aspect down.

alright, miscellaneous hc time.

he'll offer to teach you how to swordfight. he might only have done it so he could rock your shit, but he'll always patch you up after. and that little smile he gives when you first managed to get him back was pretty genuine.

just enjoys teaching you how to do his stuff in general. he'll tease you about sucking at it, but he'll actually be happy when you make progress. curse his tiny soft spot.

shows up in your house/wherever you live at random. also likes sneaking up on you whenever he sees you. the more you hate it, the more he'll do it.

he'll claim that you're more attracted to him than he is you - but that's a total lie. he's a little pathetic sometimes.

gets very flustered when you're better at him than something. anything. literally anything at all. why, exactly.. good luck getting that out of him.

actually gets genuinely upset if he goes too far with you in any way. it'll mess with him a lot, and he'll apologize profusely.

he cares about you, despite how annoying you are. despite how much he hates you, despite all of it. he cares about you a lot. and, in his own weird way, loves you.

[dingodad]

also, hello hi, Typhon doesn't get a lot of attention on here, any information you wanna share on this mf? (i mean mf in the bestest nicest i am a fanest way possible) if not psh that's fine no biggie

typhon kind of flies under the radar because his only "gimmick" is that he is like, a normal troll guy. he's a sort of would-be protagonist, but precisely because he's such a generic everyman he is just constantly overshadowed by the other characters who simply have much weirder and more intriguing messy gay drama going on. sorry typhon. i don't even particularly like his design LOLL

like what the fuck is this shoulder strap thing going on. what was i thinking.

he works on a relay planet where items being sendificated and appearified across the empire are sorted through and checked for potentially blasphemous or illegal material. kind of like the closest thing alternia has to a mail sorting room, if they were familiar with the concept of mail. his olive blood makes him one of the higher authorities on the mostly lowblood labour-oriented colony, but it's still a lot of grunt work cleaning and fixing the pneumatic tubes that send items all over the settlement.

i'm not even sure what kinds of relationships typhon has among the other trolls, beyond being ekidna's moirail... he flarped with heftus, caetos and his moirail (they've been together a long time. very normal high school sweetheart type moirallegience) in their youths and was involved in the circumstances that lost heftus his legs, but in their adulthood those four have largely drifted. in my head i always paint him as the unpopular douchebag of the group but if we're being real he probably actually has heaps of friends that we just never see, and the fact that he isn't super close with a lot of the other main characters is just because they are too big a bunch of freaks to ever match his normcore lifestyle LOL. (also a lot of his friends are probably guys. and male friendships don't register to my enlightened eyes)

he is a Gamer and though he doesn't have the time in his work day for baby games like flarp anymore he is a hobbyist fiduspawner and loves to trade monster breeding ideas with ekidna, whose job on an Official Lusus Engineering Colony he is tooootally not jealous of. typhon may or may not be secretly breeding some illicit fiduspawn monsters in the pipes of the sendificator exchange at his job, which i'm sure will never cause any problems

[simplydannie]

I've just thought of something, since branch and the twins keep teasing about how floyd and Vaughn are like a couple, what if the two of them

Decided to pull a prank on them and pretended that they are a officially a couple to mess with them?

Ooommmg!! Yes! Vaughn would do something like that to annoy the crap out of his kids!! Buuutt i feel this would bring a tiny…twist to something:

“…What!” Vaughn exclaimed with a raised eyebrow, sitting opposite the little Troll. For his children’s sake, Vaughn had bought them a home up somewhere in Mount Rageous, away from the city, and away from the under-city…somewhere safer for them to live but not far either. Today, the twins had invited everyone to their house warming party. Once Vaughn arrived, the teasing began..

“Hey Floyd! Your wife is here!” Branch called out, smirk on his face.

“Do you not realize I will and can squash the life out of you?” Vaughn snarled at the tiny creature.

“Yeah, you wont. You know your kids won’t forgive you if you did.” Branch smirked, crossing his arms. He knew he was safe, and he was dangling that card in front of Vaughn whenever he could.

“So Floyd, who’d be the girl in the relationship, you or dad?” Velvet smirked, “I say you.”

“Seriously Vels, you too?”

“I’m kidding! It’s honesty so funny to see you and dad’s reaction whenever we mention it.” She started to laugh.

“Pretend we made it official.” Floyd crossed his arms, “They tease us about it, why not give them a taste of their own medicine.”

“They wont believe it. They know i can’t stand you.” Vaughn grimaced.

“Yeah i know, i know, feeling is mutual. But just imagine the look on their faces when they just think we are a couple.”

“Listen, I wouldn’t know how to pretend even if I tried. The only one i was comfortable like that with, was my wife.”

“Then pretend I’m her!” Floyd noticed the shocked confused look on Vaughns face, “Okay, okay, that came out wrong I’m sorry, but you know what I mean.”

Vaughn groaned. He would like to see the face of the twins. A little payback for always giving him a hard time about him and the little Troll. “….Fine…don’t expect much out of me.”

“Don’t worry. Let me do all the talking.” Floyd beamed.

Everyone was down stairs. Poppy was making sure all the guests were taken care, the music blasting, everyone having a good time, “This is going so well guys!” She chimed at twins.

“Thanks! Looks like everyone they’re having fun.” Veneer smiled, “…But where are dad and Floyd? They’ve been gone for a while.”

Branch smirked, “Probably talking all lovey dove to each other.”…But he fell silent when he turned to see the sight in front him…his own brother on the shoulder of the infamous Vaughn Montegue…literally on his shoulder…the two smiling, “… Um…okay what?”

“Hey guys!” Floyd smiled, leaning on the side of Vaughns face, “Sorry we kept everyone waiting, there were some things we had to talk about and get off our chest.”

Everyone was stunned into silence: Floyd on Vaughns shoulder…both…smiling…seemingly getting along. Getting along a little two well actually. And this wasn’t like Vaughn…not like Vaughn at all.

“..Um, hey. Talking? Talking about what? Something funny? You two seem…happy.” Branch asked, afraid of the answer he was going to receive. He looked at the twins They had the same confused look on their face.

“Yeah…Um, liking this party?” Veneer asked.

“It’s pleasant.” Vaughn replied simply.

“But that’s not what we were talking about.” Floyd smiled, “Right, V.” He patted the older Rageons cheek.

“Okay..what the hell? Dad, why are you letting him do that? Flick him off your shoulder!” Velvet yelled out.

Vaughn arched an eyebrow, “Why? I find it enduring.” Floyd was even caught off guard by his response…a little flattered as a blush crossed his face.

“….En-enduring…” Veneer murmured, “….W-what’s going on?”

Floyd stood upright on Vaughns shoulder, “…Well…we thought about what you guys would continuously tell us. We took. It to heart.”

“Take what to heart Floyd!” Velvet now demanded an explanation to all of this. Why was her dad so chill about Floyd being on his shoulder? And touching his cheek!!

“What you all say about us all the time? We thought about it.” Vaughn crossed his arms side eying the Troll.

“We thought why not! Why not give it a chance, and it turns out…well, there were hidden feelings along. So we made it official. Besides you two see me as your other dad already.”

“WHAT!” The twins echoed, their jaw dropped. No, no, no, no, no, this could not be happening. Sure they loved them both, and saw them both as their dad…but….but this! Them being a….couple!

“Dad! W-with a Troll? Like, are you sure?” Veneer arched an eyebrow.

“I have an open mind.” He shrugged.

Branch still hadn’t said anything. His eyes wide, his mouth open. Sure, he would tease, sure he would make fun…but that’s all it was. He didn’t want his brother actually getting together with the Rageon. A Troll and a Rageon? That’s scandalous, “Floyd! What the heck man! I was teasing! It was nothing for you to actually consider and go for!”

“Branch it’s you have i to thank. I wouldn’t have considered it all. Yeah, we’re different, but I think we can make each other happy. We both care for the twins.”

“He’s like nine, ten years older than you!”

“Age is just a number my brother.”

“FLOYD!”

Floyd and Vaughn both smirked as they saw the three going crazy. Velvet and Veneer rambling how this was weird, how they love the idea of two dads, but not like this. And Branch…sure he wanted his brother to be happy, but, with Vaughn? The guy who kidnapped him first! Tortured him almost! Was that a kink for him? He rambled and rambled along with the twins, their arguments and statement music to Floyd and Vaughns ears.

“…This was actually a good idea.” He turned to look at Floyd.

“Oh just enjoy it a little while longer.” He placed his hand on Vaughns cheek again. He quickly withdrew…They were pretending…nothing more.

The two waited awhile longer, basking in this worry and concern.

“…Are you three done yet?” Vaughn asked crossing his arms.

“NO!” They yelled in unison.

“Weeeelllll, jokes on you.” Floyd smirked, “How’d it feel? Not so good huh?”

“W-what are you talking about?” Veneer stuttered.

“You three tease us all the time. I see now that you don’t like it if it were true.” Vaughn spoke up.

“You were just messing with us! That’s horrible!” Velvet growled.

“Hey, you tease us all the time. A little taste of your own medicine. How did it taste actually?” Floyd smirked.

Velvet threw him the finger, “Hey! Do that again and im taking everything you hold dear away from you, including your phone.” Vaugh stated. She grunted, stomping her foot, she turned away and walked to her room.

“Okay, sorry! We wont tease you guys about it again! I swear!” Veneer waved his hands in the air. He turned to glance down at Branch.

The small Trolls eye twitched, “….Fine….I’ll stop….You’re cruel.”

“Cool.” Floyd hopped off Vaughns shoulder and on to a nearby desk. “Well, seems like they all learned their lesson. Nicely played. I thought you said you wouldn’t be able to play it off.”

“…Well, only to a certain point, not anything more.” Vaughn crossed his arms, “But…that was fun to see….Nice job.” He smiled down at the Troll before walking away.

Floyd only huffed and smiled as he watched the Rageon walk away….something….something funny hitting the pit of his stomach…a funny feeling. Nope, nuh uh, nope. He shook the feeling off until he turned and saw Branch staring at him.

“….Dude….” Branch told him.

“What?”

Branch crossed his arms, “Seriously?”

“….What!”

“You weren’t really playing on your end were you?”

“Branch, what are you talking about?”

“…..You….You really find Vaughn alluring!”

“NO I DON’T!” Floyd yelled at the top of his lungs… a blush across his face.

[rocksibblingsau]

Honestly, in only one chapter you have already written one of my favorite Poppy interpretations in the entire fandom. I always thought that one of her most characterizing but actually underrepresented traits is her obsolete complete lack of emotional intelligence while still being one of the kindest and well-meaning souls in the Trolls universe.

She is so similar to Branch in that way she has a clear difficulty reading and understanding people and their actions (omg they're sooo autism4autism coded fr fr /hj), they only feel so different from each other because while Branch fills that void of emotional intelligence with self-doubt and pessimism, Poppy fills it with optimism and always believing that everyone only have the best of intentions at heart.

Both of them love others with all of their hearts and loyalty, the only difference is, Poppy grew up never fearing that her trust and love were or could even be misplaced. That anyone should willing choose to harm and betray her.

And that is another reason why I love your portray of Poppy so much, because while she is still very trusting and naive, she still refuses to be vulnerable around others. Not because she is afraid to be hurt or rejected like Branch, but because she is so naturally self-sacrificing and loves the people around her so deeply that she refuses to worry them or purposely make them uncomfortable. Poppy is not worried that she is greying because she herself is going through it, but because she doesn't want her friends and father to worry about her.

She doesn't actively thinks lesser of herself like Branch does, but actually does it passively. There isn't a conscious thought process of "My issues and problems are less deserving of acknowledgement" but she continually chooses to place others' feelings, comfort and safety above her own... I going to be honest here, even I didn't realize how much Branch and Poppy paralleled and complimented each other before writing this. But the world is full of surprises I guess????

Sorry for the big ramble, really, but amazing chapter and character writing from your part nonetheless. Very excited for chapter 28 and I would like to officially state my guest for the mysterious character as Dickory, the beloved tiny angry goatman.

Thank you so much! Poppy has some fun parallels to Branch because you're right, she does seem to have some issues understanding people, as well as also refusing to be vulnerable in front of others. Like Branch she tends to go through a lot of thoughts really fast, but for the most part she tends not to assume the worst of people.

She doesn't fear being rejected for being grey, she fears making her friends miserable with her own misery.

[queenlua]

hey. hey. what mtg deck would naesala play?

Naesala doesn’t play Magic: the Gathering.  what do you think he is, some kind of nerd?

…that’s what he says, at least. except, at some point, Leanne gets her hands on some cards & omigosh there are ANGELS on here and they’re so pretty!!! & so now she has an ANGELS DECK & she wants Naesala to play, so he’s like “fine i guess”

(this is when they’re all still young and precious and adorable.  also: Ice Age is the hot new set of cards in town.  no one is actually good at Magic yet, the only way you learn the rules is via exciting rumors on the playground, the metagame advances at the pace of a monthly Scrye magazine subscription, etc)

ANYWAY.  Naesala starts out just playing whatever pile of cards Leanne hands to him & is perfectly happy getting rolled by her; he’s really treating it as a social hanging-out kinda thing, kinda like pinochle or whatever

except then Reyson makes a whole THING of it, y’know.  he shows up with his own aggressively handcrafted green/white deck and he’s going to BEAT Naesala and that’s going to make him stop bugging LEANNE.  (i mean, it won’t, but insert whatever adolescent boy logic you like here)

Naesala doesn’t care that much about winning either way, but he *is* a horrible troll and enjoys rankling Reyson

so that’s when he bothers walking into an Actual Hobby Shop for the first time (taking care not to touch anything more than he has to) (when is the last time anyone dusted this place or wiped down a counter, gross) & he asks if they have a copy of The Official Rules & he then proceeds to read them cover-to-cover

and thus, the following week, he’s the one that breaks the news to Reyson, mid-game, that regeneration can’t save your creatures from Wrath of God & Reyson is PISSED.  “that’s not fair” “it’s the rules” “you hafta SAY that first” “sorry Reyson but your river boa is dead” etc etc insert childish squabbling here

anyway.  fast-forward a bunch of years + one genocide later, and, dang, it’s been a while since Naesala and Reyson talked, huh?

Naesala hasn’t touched the game much in the interim.  i mean, he’s played some, because he’s got this one annoying underling who’s really into it, and part of being a good leader is very occasionally letting your hair down & letting everyone dunk on you in some goofy multiplayer MtG game in the mess hall.  so he has a couple gimmicky decks he’s thrown together for casual play.  he’s got a Relentless Rats + Thrumming Stone deck.  he’s got a goofy Tinker deck—he put it together when he was REALLY out of the loop, and thought he’d discovered this great new combo no one else had noticed—he was pissed when he learned that card had been banned, like, two years ago, dude.

but his main deck is this black/white weenie deck that he’s cobbled together over the years—it’s charmingly old school but still holds up reasonably well.  it’s got Hypnotic Specter and Order of the Ebon Hand and Order of the White Shield and Hymn to Tourach, and he’s thrown in a Stromgald Crusader and a Damnation and such over time, it doesn’t exactly adhere to good modern deck design principles but it generally puts in a respectable showing.

meanwhile, Reyson has gotten *way* too into MtG—like, uncomfortably into it. have you ever had a friend who got Way Into A Particular Hobby Because They Were Clearly Desperately Unhappy About Something Else In Their Life? And They’re Trying To Tell You About All This Insane Hobby Drama That They’re WAY Too Invested In And You’re Trying To Find A Subtle Way To Tell Them Bro Get A Little Bit Of A Life Please?  yeah, that.

i mean, it’s understandable!!!  he can’t possibly compete with the hawks in all their reindeer games, dude just literally does not have the muscle, but there is a decent contingent of hawks that are pretty into MtG so he is determined to dominate there.

Reyson is not a natural talent at the game, but he’s a total grind, so he is in fact the most dominant MtG player on all of Phoenicis.  so when Naesala shows up in Phoenicis for the first time in years and years, and Reyson's got all these Unresolved Feelings about that whole deal, of course he challenges Naesala to a game of MtG, yugioh frenemy style, to test his friendship mettle or something

Reyson’s playing a ridiculously aggro red/black deck.  i’m thinking some good filthy gargadon rakdos.  just on and on and on the attack

so Naesala gets out his charmingly old school black/white weenie deck, kinda rolling his eyes, but sure he’ll give Reyson a game if he wants a game, no Reyson he doesn’t know if it’s a standard legal deck or not but it’s the deck he’s got, will you shut up and just play—

and Reyson’s mostly dominating, but Naesala’s doing his level best to hang in there, and the match comes to a rather dramatic climax when Naesala manages to stabilize during one of the games & he taps out to cast a 5-mana big boi—

and, yeah, of course Naesala’s janky old school black/white deck has a Serra’s Angel as a win condition & yeah it’s the exact same one Leanne gifted him years and years ago & they both know it.

they end the game pretty quickly & awkwardly after that & neither of them remembers who actually won.

(wow this Naesala guy is such a simp.  god this is such a fucking cheesy moment.  i hate this, hold on, i’m gonna go throw up in my mouth a little… OKAY i’m back.)

ANYWAY.  all that plays out, doot dee doo, fast forward to post-Radiant Dawn:

* Reyson’s a very happy red/white Boros player these days.  he has chilled out a little bit but is still pretty easy to bait into getting Mad And Competitive again.  (Tibarn frequently does this because it’s kind of cute when Reyson’s pissed about magical cards) ((Tibarn’s decks are absolute piles, oh my god.  just the most janky barely-functional Timmy stuff imaginable. someone explain the concept of a mana curve to this poor man))

* Leanne still likes ANGELS!!!! & also white weenie stuff & also cute stuff generally.  despite her benign appearance & her weakness for playing Cute Stuff over Good Stuff, she’s a more naturally talented player than Reyson & has just enough of a killer instinct to generally come out on top

* Naesala favors black, and mostly just tries to figure out whatever deck he can play to troll his local meta, but he’s still got that black/white deck in a sentimental drawer somewhere.

also: look, i don’t play Commander nearly enough to provide any substantive commentary on that front, but… my very first instinct, when i read this question, was: “this bitch would definitely run Braids, Cabal Minion as his commander.”  except i looked it up and apparently Braids is Very Banned In Commander.  boo.  does the format ban fun, too.  c’mon, let a dude ruin everyone’s game every once in a while!!!  i think Naesala is equally pissed about Braids being banned is what i’m saying

so yeah that is my complete theory of Naesala And Magic The Gathering lol