#nix takes art seriously for once

[nix-xin-art]

hai soundwave nation

[bellewintersroe]

hello! i would love to join in the BoB ship requests :) i’m about 5’6, have shoulder length dark brown curly hair, blue eyes, and glasses. i have been described as quiet and a little awkward when people are getting to know me, but once i warm up i’m very loyal and make a great listener and can be very outgoing around friends. i’m empathetic and always try to put others before me.

i’m majoring in behavioral neuroscience and psychology, with a minor in philosophy. i love learning about history and i also get into literature and art sometimes. i also enjoy traveling and studying different cultures (i’m half egyptian, so i especially love exploring that side of myself). the goal is to become a neurologist, specifically for cases such as traumatic brain injuries. my MBTI is INFJ and my enneagram is 4w3 if that helps.

thank you 😊

thank you for your request!!!

I ship you with… Dick Winters!

I think the thing that made me ship you with dick was your personality type? I feel like I’m BoB from my perception Winters gives off these vibes too? Or at least the way you are around people is attractive to him.

first of all, I think he’d sense you’re feeling a little awkward around all these new people, maybe you’ve just met him and met like 5059500493 other members from easy so you’re feeling a little overwhelmed?

this wouldn’t put Dick off, in fact I feel like he’d be so respectful and he’d make sure he introduced himself first and asked for you name, he’d deffo like shake your hand and his cheeks would turn red.

like maybe he didn’t admire you fully until you were standing in front of him???? And I feel like BAM the feelings would be instant for Dick.

strikes me as love at first sight???

Like Speirs, I think he’d watch yiu from afar- not in a creepy way, but Nix would realise and his eyebrows would perk and he’d be like ‘omg you’re in love!!!’

No Lewis it’s been 2 days but try again next week?

seriously, I think dick would want to stay professional, but during his days off he’d maybe take walks with you??? He’d recognise how intuitive and empathetic you were maybe through your work? I feel like he’d maybe slyly ask Eugene or somebody a tiny bit more about you??

Anyway you mentioned you put others before yourself, I feel like Dick would pick up on this and make sure you’re taking care of yourself tho???

like the way he did with Eugene, but this time he personally wants to help and make sure you’re resting?? Maybe in doing this he’d like ‘let’s go take a walk’ or ‘I’ll grab a coffee for you’ and for a while that becomes his love language <3

With war looming I think Dick deffo just gives into the prospect of asking you out and you’d grown fairly comfortable with each other so he just slides it in conversation one day.

when you agree I feel like he’d borderline giggle?????

So when the two of you are together I feel like you’d both be hugely respectful of each others time alone??? Like if you needed some alone time to relax he’d be all for it. But maybe after a while this becomes a habit you start to do together?

As in you’ll just chill there in comfortable silence, you don’t even have to be touching, or sometimes Dick will gaze over and take your hand gently- just to remind you he’s there 🤮🤮🤮🤮 I’m so sick I need this in my life

Senses immediately when you’re feeling awkward in a big group and deffo is the type to brush his fingers against yours, which nobody else can see btw.

wont overstep his boundaries EVER. Remains professional in front of the men and behind closed doors. He’s a good judge of character like I feel you would be too, so he just knows a good 80% of the time how you’re feeling before you even need to vocalise it.

the two of you are such an educated couple? Like I think we’re forgetting he graduated with the highest academic standing in the business college. I feel like subconsciously having an educated partner could be somewhat important to him?

the fact you’re majoring in all these insanely smart topics has Dick overly proud. I can picture him being at every single graduation, award ceremony, whatever tf else, he just shows up. Always.

maybe you two clash a little in the fact you want to travel and he wants to find a quiet corner of the earth and stay there forever. I sense he’s quite a homebody, but will definitely compromise with you.

1000% will enjoy just laying in the sun and going swimming on the beach. If you wanted to sunbathe I feel like you’d just admire him from afar in the ocean and he’d come over and accidentally drip water on you and the book you’re reading.

he’d have a little klutz around that made you both laugh before he’d settle next to you on the towels and keep a hand on your stomach just for comfort?

the fact you’re half Egyptian, listen, I think dick maybe finds this superrrr attractive and interesting. The fact you’re so keen to explore your culture is something that Dick wants to take on board too. He shows a great interest in it.

he’d just be so love sick with you- I think life with him would be so tranquil and calm, the two of you would seem to relaxed together? I love it.

I ship you platonically with… Floyd Talbert!

So didn’t winters call tab his guardian Angel or something???

well maybe he could have some involvement in setting the two of you up??

maybe you and Floyd weren’t so close at first especially if you were a little quiet, but when he finds out his best friend has it down bad for you he NEEDS to make this happen.

so one day he just starts being super keen and chatting to you about winters. Like overly chatting, you’re kinda overwhelmed but to the point you just find it hilarious and Floyd is confused???

he’s so excited and gives off such golden retriever vibes, you find it impossible to not click with him.

maybe you try set him up with one of your friends the way he does with you and Dick??? I feel like it wouldn’t work, don’t ask me why, he’s just too focused on actually getting you two on a date?

but when it actually happens tab takes ALL the credit, he’s literally so so SO happy for the two of you and stands and watches you both like a proud dad?

‘I did that’ he’d boast to the men of east who wouldn’t really know what he’s talking about? For a while maybe only him and Nixon are the ones that know about your relationship ???

Idk but this bond you grow with tab never goes away and I can imagine him being like the cool uncle, he’d deffo show up to all your graduations too??? He’d be so so proud and if the two of you get married, you best bet Floyd is BEGGING to be the best man.

[queenoftheworldisdead]

Cupid

Note: This is for @afriendlyblackhottie​​ Brat and Birthday challenge. Happy Bday Month 🎉🎈🎊🎂🍰! I chose Cupid by 112. Chris art work by @nix-akimbo​ she is amazing here is the original.

Summery: Ransom likes a bridesmaid.

Warning: Daddy Kink, gag, oral (reader receives), sex

Groomsman Band member Ransom x Black Reader, Knives out Alternative Universe

Leaning in the archway of the reception hall you sighed watching the newlyweds dance their first dance. You didn't want to be here. Not after all the shit he put Courtney, the bride, through.

But your bestie was the kind of girl that could not function without a man in her life. He had cheated on her five times, that you knew of. You were sure there was more, but she as well as you were tired of the berating.

It was always the same. He cheated, she cried, you picked up the pieces and then when he was ready she would go back. Pathetic.

"Aw don't pout princess your day will come" your eyes rolled at the sound of his voice. You had the misfortune to be linked with Ransom, the cousin of the groom. All the other bridesmaids drooled over him, but you weren't impressed. This rich boy was looking to add to his body count so you only interacted with him only when you needed to.

Their family had paid for this whole affair. You nearly punched one of the grooms relatives when she made a remark on Courtney's color choices. They were all on your shit list.

Just ignore him. Its almost over and you will never have to see him again.

As the song ended everyone applauded while you made your way over to the open bar. Your wrist was snagged as you crossed his path. Snatching it back you looked at him as if he grew another head.

"Look you don't want to be here I don't want to be here. Let's be miserable together." He held up his hands in surrender. You were stuck on this island and you were smart enough not to fall for dumb shit so you gave yourself permission to relax.

You both took over an empty table in the back of the massive hall. Ransom disappeared for a bit, then returned with two bottles of champagne and two glasses. The bar was an open bar, but you were sure they weren't handing out bottles left and right.

"OK let's play a game to pass the time." Ransom proposed as he approached.

"Game? What kind of game?" You waited curiously. Sitting the glasses and bottles down Ransom proceeded to pop the cork on one of the bottles of Champaign.

"We both take turns pointing out people we think the other would fuck."your mouth fell open with his boldness as he spoke. "If you guess wrong you have to take a sip. Yatta yatta you get it."

"Are you just trying to get me drunk?" You squint at him playfully suspicious.

"Nah, just bored. So come on let's play."

You watched as he poured the glasses to the brim, when he handed you the bubbling glass you thanked him. Ransom moved his chair next to you, sitting shoulder to shoulder so you both were sure to have the same view of the people on the floor.

"Ladies first" he held his glass high. You clinked your glass with his signaling ‘good game’.

"What about her?" You pointed to Courtney's great aunt. The lovely woman was at least eighty-seven, you knew this would be a 'no', but why not start off with a softball.

He gave you a look that made you snort.

"Wow was that a laugh? I seriously didn't think the ice queen was capable. You didn't even smile for the wedding photos. Achievement unlocked." Ransom was full of himself.

"No one is gonna believe I got the frost queen to crack a smile." Ransom boasted.

You took a sip from your glass so you didn't have to reply. There was nothing to smile about. You didn't approve of this wedding so you weren't going to act like you were. Courtney was lucky you even agreed to be a bridesmaid.

"OK my turn." He observed the crowded floor, before finding his mark. "Glasses two o'clock."

You searched out 'Glasses' and scoped him out. Tall, put together nicely. "Yep."

"Really?" He gave you a look, that made it hard to fight back the curl of your lip.

"Yep..I have particular taste." You say casually with a shrug.

"Well all right to each his own I guess."

"My turn" you stopped for a beat then found her. " Oh what about her?" you pointed to a tall slender blonde.

"Ugh no...That's my aunt."

"Oooops....My bad... let me see who else, umm" you looked around the room, but he only looked at you.

"Oh! Oh! Her" you pointed to Stephani, a younger cousin of Courtney's. Thick thighed, uber fit college student.

"You can't go twice. Take your sip."

"What that was your aunt that cant count" you argued back.

"A no is a no" he tutted.

"Fine" you gulped from your glass and waited your turn.

"OK my turn. Hmm...What about him" he pointed to an older man that was chatting up a bridesmaid that was way to young for him.

"Eww nah not my type, but he might have gotten a yes back in the day." You tilted your head with a smirk.

"Oh thank gawd. That's my dad."

"What the fuck? Dude gross" you slapped at his shoulder and laughed. Ransom rubbed it fanning pain.

"Hey you picked my aunt" he chuckled with you.

"Yeah but I didn't know she was your aunt!"

After finishing the first bottle you started to feel loose. Ransom's arm stretched out along the back of your chair, slyly rubbing circles on your bare arm, while you leaned snuggled into his side as you both continue to people watch.

"So what do you do?" You asked him.

Ransom was silent for a moment. Taking a long swig from the glass before looking over at you and sighing.

"I'm in a band."

"Oh really, is that your little hobby you do before you take over the board seat at your grand-papa's company?" you bit back a laugh. Ransom frowned at you, but you didn't care.

You knew of the older Thrombey, the famous author and owner of a publishing house. Through rehearsal you watched the interactions between the two and you knew that Ransom was the favorite of the acclaimed writer's brood.

"I don't want anything to do with that company believe it or not. I love music always have."

"Must be nice to play in a band bankrolled by a publishing house. What are y'all called 'Blood and Rock'" you laughed at the ridiculousness of it.

"Ha wrong again. We're called 'Coffee and Roses'. And I've been cut of financially ever since I got these bad boys" Ransom shimmed out of his blazer and rolled up his sleeves. His well toned arms were completely covered in ink. When he pulled down his collar you were able to see the massive art work that encompassed his neck, you bit into your bottom lip as he allowed you to ogle him. "This art work was not board approved " he joked. The booze mixed with Ransom's rocker bod was starting to lower your inhibitions and you needed to put a stop to it.

"Your cousin is a piece of shit." You changed the subject before taking a pull from your glass.

"Yeah well he gets that from his dad, he's always been an asshole."

"Apples don't fall far do they?" You snipped. When Ransom didn't respond you looked over, he was looking at his father who had now moved on to another pretty young thing.

"He made a mistake and he is fixing it." Ransom replied, suddenly in defense of his cousin.

The mistake in question was a child, by another woman. That baby you thought would be the final straw to break the camels back.

"Diamonds don't fix problems." You didn't come from money, but you knew that this wedding was a band-aid. And once it got wet you wondered what would be the gift for the next 'mistake'.

The groom had always bought his way out of his binds. The more he fucked up the more money he poured on it. This wedding you couldn't even fathom the cost. The wedding ring alone looked like it could choke a horse. And this destination wedding on his dime made you think on what happened in the interim leading up to this event.

"You're a really good friend. She's lucky that she has someone that cares so much." You both stared into the distance at the couple. They danced and smiled at each other so happy, but you felt sick. Ransom's sweet words made you immediately suspicious of his intent, his cousin had a habit of talking sweet, but he was a fucking snake. You weren't going to end up like Courtney.

"Look don't think that just because we got all chummy that all of a sudden I am gonna want to bang one out." You hit your glass on the table harder than you meant to, it tipped over and spilled out the rest of your drink.

When a little bit of the liquid trickled off the table and hit your dress you pushed away from the table. Just a tiny bit, nothing major to fuss about, but you had hit your limit. You'd done the wedding, you took the pictures and you stuck around for the reception. It was time to go.

You weren't about to be some random rich kids one night stand. So you stormed off. Thankfully the ball room was not far from the adjoining hotel. Marching you fumed and you cursed your friend for being this dumb, yourself for not doing more to stop this and almost falling for Ransom's charm. Mashing the buttons you thought of changing your number, wiping your hands from this friendship and looking into an overnight flight back home.

How much worse would it be now that she was legally married to that douche bag. The thought of them having kids only served to further irked you.

Before the elevator door could close a hand sliced down the middle, halting the closure.

You stood stunned as Ransom appeared out of breath and in-between the open doors.

**"Baby, I'm so tired of the way you turn my words into deception and lies"**

Ransom consumed the space between you two. Your ass hit the hand rail as the doors closed.

"I am not my father, I am not my cousin. I liked you." His confession made your heart flutter.

Don't be stupid. He is the same as the rest of his family. Don't fall for his game.

His hands rested on the bar on either side of your hips as he stood toe to toe with you. You rolled your eyes and scoffed turning away from him, unable to keep staring into those eyes.

**Don't misunderstand me when I try to speak my mind I'm only saying what's in my heart**

With one finger he brought your focus back to him. You frowned at him, you weren't weak. You weren't falling for him no matter how much your body wanted to throw in the towel.

**Cupid doesn't lie** He leaned in close and you held your breath as your heart raced.

**But you won't know unless you give it a try** Ransom whispered over your lips before kissing you gently. You broke down allowing him to invade your mouth. His lips felt soft and his firm arms a welcome feeling as they wrapped around you.

The elevator dinged loudly and you pulled back. Your lipstick smeared on his mouth made for a funny sight. Looking at the number it was your floor then back at him.

**Give it a try** Ransom pleaded.

A switch flipped inside you. Angry at yourself you pushed past him and marched to your hotel room.

He is just a spoiled rich kid trying to have fun. Don't fall for it. You try and convince yourself.

He shouted as the doors closed and you tried to ignore him.

**Cupid doesn't lie**

He shouted again. You halted, but refused to look.

"All men lie" You stopped as you replied back at him. There wasn't a woman in your life that wasn't hurt and you didn't want to join that club. You wanted to protect yourself at all cost. You heard the elevator doors close so you let out a sigh of relief.

What if you were wrong. What if he was right? A nagging thought bubbled in your mind. He was fun, you felt at easy around him. Some part of you yearned for him to come back.

You were so lost in your own head that you hadn't heard him rush up behind you. Ransom quickly spun you around, his eyes boring into your soul. The sight of which made it hard to stay angry.

**"Oh baby, true love won't lie...But we won't know unless we give it a try"**

He kissed you again. This time more hungry than before, so much so it took your breath away as he pulled back.

**"Give it a try"** he pleaded yet again.

It was hard to get the door open with Ransom latched onto your face. Fumbling with the key you tried blindly several times to get the card in the slot with your back pressed hard against the door.

Frustrated Ransom snatched the card and opened the door for you.

"Thanks Daddy" you teased, looking up through your lashes at him.

"Daddy huh?" The grin that grew on his face was devilish indeed. "So that's it...You act all bratty to get Daddy to react. Huh?"

Scooping you off your feet he carried you across the threshold. You were so surprised that he was able to handle your weight with ease, as he walked you over to the bed, before tossing you.

"Keep the dress on and pull your tits out" he command as he furiously unbuttoned his shirt.

You marveled at the fit rocker. He revealed more tats as he opened his shirt. Pushing down your off the shoulder strap you yanked your top down. Your half bra going down with it, allowing your breast to bounce free.

"Stand up."

Without a word you rose to your feet.

"Turn around."

Again you followed his orders. The way he commanded you made your need soak through your panties.

"Gonna come deep in that pretty pussy, show you who you belong to" Ransom taunted into the shell of your ear. "Say ahh."

The neck tie that had long since come undone was now being wrapped around your open mouth, wrapping it  quickly then knotting the fabric.  

Once secure Ransom proceeded to massage your breast from behind. As he tweaked your nipples you felt his cock, hard and stiff pressed into your ass.

You pushed and rubbed against it toying with him, the hum that buzzed from his lips almost sounded primal. "Nothing but a big tease huh? Daddy's going to show you what he thinks about teases."

Pushing you over on the bed you yelped through your gag. Looking over your shoulder you watched as Ransom bunched up the fabric of your dress, tossing it over your hips to expose your ass.

Feeling cocky you twerked your ass before him, the look in his eye showed that he approved of the sight. Ransom palmed your cheeks with both his hands, kneading the soft tissue as he rubbed his erection on you.

One hand moved around your hips and on the outer-lining of your panties.

"Fuck baby girl is that all for me?" Ransom's finger pulled at the elastic that touched your bud. He felt the drenched panties and pulled them back until they snapped back in place.

"Fuck baby girl" he purred.

Ransom lowered himself onto his hunches, pulling your panties down with them. You felt his tongue lapping gently at your folds. The sensation sending shivers throughout your body.

His tongue separated your lips, you knees wanted to cave at the tantalizing feel of him. Through your gag you moaned, the slow torture of his feasting was bringing you close to the finish line.

Ransom sucked hard on your bare mound adding a finger as he rose to his feet. "You taste so sweet baby." He praised as he curled his fingers inside of you.

"Do you want to come on my cock or my fingers?" He asked as your cunt tensed around his digits. Ransom knew you were getting close and you hoped he would choose the former.

"I cant hear you" he added another digit as you begged through your gag. You wanted to feel him all of him, but there was no way to make your answer clear through the fabric.

"Well, if you are not going to answer I will pick for you."

Ransom knew what you wanted, even with your desperate mumbling. Kicking your legs father apart he then removed his fingers. You whimpered at the lack of touch, but you were also thrilled to finally get what you really wanted.

The sound of his zipper going down made you antsy. You danced on the heels of your feet with anticipation of his next move.

Ransom took his cock in one hand while he spread one of your cheeks with the other. He rubbed his cock against the deep pink within your folds.

Toying with you as you mumbled through the tie. His pre-cum mixed with your juices as he pressed his tip hard against your opening.

"Are you gonna be a good girl from me?" He teased. You furiously nodded 'yes'.

You felt the pressure of him entering you as drool seeped past your gag. "Do you belong to me?" He halted, the sudden stop drove you crazy. Again you nod and shouted 'yes' through your restraint.

"Good girl."

Ransom filled you to your core, only stopping when you sheathed him completely. You gripped the fabric of the hotel duvet, you hadn't expected him to be so big.

The slapping of flesh on flesh filled the room. His moans mixed with the sounds of your sloppy sex were enough to send you over the edge.

Ransom controlled the pace, his length undeterred by your lack of space to take him in. You cried through your gag as he sent jolts through your body. "You were made for me" he proclaimed as he snapped his hips into you.

Your mewls were muffled by the tie, but you were sure whoever was in the room next to you could still make out what was happening here.

"Fuck" he growled as he fucked you into the bed. "I'm gonna fill you up."

"Gonna make you nice and round" he slapped your ass as he thrusted. You felt your core tighten.

"Fuck Daddy I want to come on your cock!" You finally shouted as the gag finally slipped from your lips.

"Come in me Daddy!" You felt him twitch inside you at your desperate pleading.

"Oh baby girl your tempting me."

"Please!" You panted.

"Fuck" Ransom shouted as he shot his load inside you. You felt him coat you as you milked him dry.

Ransom fell on-top of you and your knees buckled, causing you both to fall forward onto the bed. Ransom moved off you, sweaty and exhausted. "Don't think that I'm done with you yet."

[inclineto]

Books, May - June 2021

Tess of the Road - Rachel Hartman [dnf]

A River of Stars - Vanessa Hua

The Sealed Letter - Emma Donoghue

Giant Bones - Peter S. Beagle

Moominsummer Madness - Tove Jansson *

The Beacon at Alexandria - Gillian Bradshaw *

The Phantom Tollbooth - Norton Juster *

Libertie - Kaitlyn Greenidge 

Stay - Nicola Griffith

Four Lost Cities: A Secret History of the Urban Age - Annalee Newitz [Thoroughly enjoyable, but also the sort of pop archaeology book where things like this happen repeatedly, and I’m sorry, but I laughed: “And then, as if by magic, the eminent University of Cambridge archaeologist Andrew Wallace-Hadrill appeared.” (As far as the narrative admits, they did not have an appointment; while they were wandering around Pompeii, collecting information about his speciality, he was wandering around Pompeii, happy to be encountered and become a source.)]

Teach Me - Olivia Dade

The Address Book: What Street Addresses Reveal About Identity, Race, Wealth, and Power - Deirdre Mask

We Are Watching Eliza Bright - A.E. Osworth [“I am not going to read the gamergate novel,” I said, “and especially not when it’s using 1st person plural MFA POV half of the time,” but then I voyeuristically devoured the gamergate novel which is, really, its point: “We are obsessed with what goes on where we can’t see it.”] *

Ivory Apples - Lisa Goldstein [what the hell?!? no.]

The Future of Another Timeline - Annalee Newitz

The Scarlet Seed - Edith Pargeter [the scenes that made me cry as a child still make me cry now, and that’s rather nice]

The Perilous Life of Jade Yeo - Zen Cho [Five books later, I’m prepared to admit that Zen Cho and I aligned for one glorious novel and some related characters (Sorcerer to the Crown; Rollo & Aunt Georgiana), and I’m mostly indifferent to everything else, but I keep trying because there’s always a sentence like this: “Being good-looking and interesting and having the heavy-lidded gaze of a romantic tapir does not excuse writing a foolish book.”]

Elementals - A. S. Byatt

Searching for Black Confederates: The Civil War’s Most Persistent Myth - Kevin M. Levin

What Katy Did Next - Susan Coolidge

Feed the Resistance: Recipes + Ideas for Getting Involved - Julia Turshen et al.

A Duke, the Lady, and a Baby - Vanessa Riley [dnf]

The Sibyl in Her Grave - Sarah Caudwell

Sabriel - Garth Nix *

Outcrossing - Celia Lake [dnf]

Mending Matters: Stitch, Patch, and Repair Your Favorite Denim & More - Katrina Rodabaugh [so I feel like this was a couple of blog posts inflated into a book]

Rosaline Palmer Takes the Cake - Alexis Hall [extremely funny, made me want to bake during a heat wave, likely to suffer in reviews from mismatched genre expectations: it’s romantic comedy, not romance (I’ve just looked and yep! this is a major complaint)] *

Tales from Moominvalley - Tove Jansson

Goblin Fruit - Celia Lake [dnf]

Coffee Boy - Austin Chant [trying to do more than its length and thin characterization can carry, but also heartening in the main character’s explicit refusal to embody a limited and patronizing narrative of marginalized suffering; I wouldn’t want every trans romance to do this so overtly, just as I don’t want every queer romance to be about overcoming homophobia, but I want a few of them to (fair also to note that in contemporary settings, I find boss/intern scenarios really unappealing, and no, I don’t care if they talk about it; had it been longer I would almost certainly have bailed)]

Uncanny Valley - Anna Wiener [didn’t really plan to read this; definitely didn’t expect to enjoy it as much as I did - I thought it would be just another new adult navel-gazing indictment of tech bros, and it is, but it’s got seriously good style to go with it] *

Lord John and the Private Matter - Diana Gabaldon

Behind Closed Doors: At Home in Georgian England - Amanda Vickery

On Juneteenth - Annette Gordon-Reed

Salt Magic, Skin Magic - Lee Welch

Lord John and the Hand of Devils - Diana Gabaldon [read the first two novellas, but my tolerance for Diana Gabaldon’s Diana-Gabaldon-ness is relatively low and the second novel wore it out; dnf]

Lord John and the Brotherhood of the Blade - Diana Gabaldon

A Seditious Affair - KJ Charles [because once you’re 75+ comments into an increasingly-involved modern AU, the only reasonable thing to do is give in (looking back at the innocence of this mid-June annotation...oh, you sweet summer child)] *

Four Hundred Souls: A Community History of African America 1619-2019 - edited by Ibram X. Kendi and Keisha N. Blain [in the end, I’m not sure the organizing principles of 5 year chunks and short word counts really allow enough scope for many of the essays, but look for this to show up on Most Challenged lists and as a target of reactionary legislation anyway]

A Gentleman’s Position - KJ Charles [see prev. entry in series]

The Secret Adversary - Agatha Christie [sometimes you should not reread your childhood books]

Fire Watch - Connie Willis

The Ruin of Gabriel Ashleigh - KJ Charles [possibly shouldn’t be an entry, but what the heck, it’s sold separately; see prev. entry in series]

The City of Brass - S. A. Chakraborty

American Quilts: The Democratic Art - Robert Shaw [that subtitle tells you exactly what to expect from the text, but the quilts are lovely]

Engaging Diverse Communities: A Guide to Museum Public Relations - Melissa A. Johnson

Strange the Dreamer - Laini Taylor [dnf]

[keyheartsia-dorm]

*Sighs*

I’m bored let’s do a lore dump

It’s a Map~

Oh Yeah I mentioned a Sprinkle of Final Fantasy and KH but I haven’t talked about that Aspect of my Canon At all have I? Well truth be told it’s cause I’m focusing on getting the more Basic Aspects of my Oc’s Before I get into that but Guess who made this Baby on a Whim!

So this is the Map of the Isle of Light well the Main Island at least there are other Littler Bits of land Yet to surface I̶t̶’̶s̶ ̶t̶o̶t̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶s̶o̶ ̶I̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶A̶d̶d̶ ̶o̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶L̶a̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶h̶a̶h̶a̶ oh yeah did I mention it’s a FLOATING ISLAND!! Yeah P Sick right? Okay so I’ll go into the Island’s History and it’s Area’s but it may have some Spoilers I guess you could say but honestly I wouldn’t wait on me making a full fledged...Anything outta the Story I’ve made like I’ll sum it up (not here but like in general) but comics are hard Videos are hard Fics are hard maybe not individually but this is more of a Anime Series then an Anime movie if you feel me without further ado...Stuff

Oh god this was longer then expected

Some General Background

So The Isle of Light was Originally the Black Forest A Place of Freedom and Expression for all who lead lives who Needed to hide Such and Some Such was The Coven of the Black Forest made up of 3 sisters (not biologically also there was a 4th) they all found comfort and love with each other one being the Princess of the Kingdom nearby (The 4th and Littlest one) She had a fiancé who was Mad with a Lust for power and Control over things he Didn’t need power and control over He Treated the Littlest one Cruelly when the other 3 Decided enough was enough when he did...SOMETHING to Part of the Forest so Horrible it turned Dead and Cruel (Subtle Subtle Hint Hint Wink) When all 3 Of them saw the Ruin They went so mad they turned to Darkness and fought him and all his Manmade monstrosities there when the Princess Arrived there was so much Dark energy everywhere it was Bad like Real Bad So with her friends now monsters she Fought them with a heavy heart her heart broke so much she fell afterwards immediately Unintentionally Sending her Kingdom to somewhere nobody knows where she is though...That’s an even bigger question BUT the story would live on as a Weilder of the key blade who slayed 3 evil witches...(Oh yeah did I mention Crowley knows And that’s Why He Let the Girls Attend because he thought they might be the Black Forest Coven Reincarnated And the Prophecy that when they Awakened the “Keys to their Hearts once more” They’d Free The Princess From her Mirror Prison Oh Yeah also the princess DID Die But her Reincarnation Goes inside a Mirror and is trapped there when she turns 17 and Doesn’t leave until she dIES ALSO ITS HIS OLDEST DAUGHTER THIS TIME ALSO YES HE HAS 2 DAUGHTERS...Okay lemme just calm down..Also yeah she thought of the Princess System) but After a Wish got safe haven for all Keyblade Weilders (I have KH Oc’s other then these don’t ask Longer story they live and basically founded Fortana Haven) I guess the Isle of Light Rose from the Shadow Realm to be just that oh yeah also the Isle of light is literally that kingdom if ya didn’t know

Fortana Haven

(Some Love Nikki BGs for Visualization if I’m Wrong about this from being from Love Nikki Correct me pls and if this is your art sorry and I’ll take it down)

Okay this Place Basically a Modern Fairytale Everything is so Rustic~ but they Have Cafe’s and Stuff~ They’re still very much in Development as a City..or town..or whatever Boss of everything Locket Clover (An OG KH OC) Runs Everything Wonderfully she welcomes everything with open arms and If you wanna run a shop or want a Building for a particular Thing or Activity she’s Pretty open to the idea unless it’s Incredibly Dumb But she will make you get The Wood and Supplies and The Bricks and the Brick Stick Sauce or whatever it’s called she might get give you help constructing but dang is she a firm believer in “DIY” but I like how she’s Determined to Have a Good Balance between Industrial and Rural In fact there is a Mall (God knows how it got there) And that’s pretty much all there is for your Juicy Capitalism Fix She Runs “Hope Stir” Workshop according to Her boyfriend Ephmer It was always Called a workshop but for the longest time she did EVERYTHING Subtle Farmwork And Animal Husbandry ACTUAL Workshop things all cause she wanted to help every Weilder she knew out and made sure they had a place for food and such She is a bit of a Moneyholic but when you’ve been doing what she’s been doing I bet you’d be too overall While it doesn’t have much History yet Fortana Haven (4-Tana is how you say it btw) Is truly well a Haven

The Crowned Castle

(More Pics for Visuals I don’t think this is from love Nikki but if this is your artwork same applies I’m not gonna be the guy who Claims just cause it’s on google it belongs to everybody or something even though yeah I did find it on google)

The...Crown of the Isle of Light Before We came to the Isle for the first time Apparently Everyone In Fortana thought it was Haunted! Which..Fair enough Before we Placed the Princess Medals (Okay QUICK SUMMARY OF THIS BIT Okay so in the KH Mobile game there’s Medals and I wanted them to be in my story basically They’re Memories formed into powers when all my Oc’s Met the Princess’s Of Heart They Each got a Medal Representing them and then the Medals Restored the Castle I left out some details but basically that’s it) This Castle is the BOMB There’s Cool Pretty Princess Room’s And a Bedroom JUST FOR SLUMBER PARTIES!! And it’s just a good Place to Vibe and Hang out with your friends (I’m sorry I’m about to Lore Dumb all over this place) The Princess’s Fiancé Made a Crown for her before she could put it on he put some of his Subconscious in it poor Eden When she wanted to get stronger for Malleus (Malleus is her adoptive big brother and she was upset cause she felt she wasn’t good enough ran away to get power and found the crown) It really did almost completely overtake her I shudder thinking about it “Kachow”...Ew (The fiancé said that a lot ok) a lotta bad stuff happened here but as selfish as this may sound I feel like I earned my spot here and I wanna keep sharing it with my friends

The Matteria Deadland

(Also Imagine some Pointy Mountains and some Lite Mech debris)

Man What to say... So Much Happened here as well probably Tragedy I can’t comprehend there is a few good places about this place though Diane likes to Scavange around Here for Interesting Debris Eden doesn’t like the Air around here but she says she finds Interesting Jewels here and Latte says the same thing so there is good to be found here We all come here every so often to try to help..Anything grow but they don’t call this deadland for nothing but still ya can’t give up hope! I wanna grow some beautiful Lillies here one day! Also hey! Also pretty cool name (Matter-RI-a is how you say it btw) All the sadness that happened here it actually did make the land rich in Metal if nothing else there’s even a whole Cavern we found in the mountains...it almost killed us but we found it

Opal Cove

(also these are Gacha Backgrounds)

Is this Place an Actual Cove? Idk

Is this Place super cool and pretty? Yeah

Is this one of my favorite places in this whole Isle? FRICK YEAH

okay I love a lot about this Isle but Opal Cove!!

Our mermaid friend Mitella I guess “Runs” the Place Our KINDA merman Friend Skye also spends a whole lotta time here Basically it’s a Giant Pool and rumor has it...It’s endless Water...CAUSE IT IS SOMEHOW CAUSE I KNOW weird thing is the Sand it’s at the end of the Isle so there’s not really a beach just...Sand Near Water Odd The Coral Near the Bottom or well “Bottom” Is SO PRETTY it’s like Crystals in the morning the light shines its SO DANG PRETTY I’m glad Mitella is a Sea Witch Or else we couldn’t go so deep underwater it’s SOOO worth it!! She does NOT let a lotta people at once though Heck she doesn’t like Skye that much from what I can tell but she makes an Exception for ~friends~ So...BE NICE TO OUR CUTE MITELLA I’m glad we have a Convient Place for Blitzball practice and also Swimming around with pretty Mermaid Tails (New Nix Mermaid Action Fashion Doll only 25.99! Get it for your Child or they’ll cry!! Also a 5 dollar Boy doll take his Shirt off! That’s it!) Hyde Mi And Skye are kinda an Iconic Trio Mi Also Teaches how to swim with a mermaid tail better for the Weilders who wanna go to Atlantica Hey Mermaids gotta eat so get a Swim Lesson! (And also a transforming Mermaid Doll!)

Bianco Nero Forest

Well tbh I have the least to say because it’s Appeal is simple ADVENTURE AND MYSTERY! Lots can happen in Bianco Nero it’s Basically the Base foundation of the whole Isle! Presumably cause it’s the Black Forest or was at least though it can be dangerous it’s the only place heartless are know to appear in the whole isle (So where you’ll grind In the Video Game that’ll definitely happen :Says the girl who can’t commit to a single comic) They drop all sortsa cool stuff! Heck you can FIND Cool stuff just...Around so..Yeah!!

It’s 2 am maybe I’ll edit this later thanks for reading sorry I got obviously tired by the end goodbye my dearests~ (Seriously y’all deserve like a reward for reading this dumpster fire) I was inspired by those maps in those scholastic books like the Rainbow Fairies I think it was called (Anyone remember those?) that had lil maps in the beginning and also the map’s stickers all on PicsArt

[yeats-infection]

@sqvalors tagged me in a lil writing meme... if you’d like to participate please do and tag me! 

ao3 name: fluorescentgrey but i also post some things as drglass (dr. glass is the second song on the fluorescent grey EP by deerhunter, so if i make another pseud it will be likenew, then washoff, etc.) 

fandoms: about two thirds of my fics are harry potter or star wars but there are a lot of random little goodies. currently i have shifted into the terror (2018) mode. 

number of fics: 59 right now... i will throw a party when i get to 69... 

fic i spent the most time on: this is funny because some of these technically took me like six months or more of working on them extremely intermittently... namely, bone machine. the series in the garden has taken me the most time generally... and in that, minuet did take me several months of working really hard while i had a schedule / commute that was not conducive to having a creative practice... 

fic i spent the least amount of time on: hilariously, literally my most popular fic by ninety miles, the witcher PWP that i wrote out of spite in two or three hours. 

longest fic: the source codes series... particularly heelstone which is 102k. i wrote these two stories in a single summer like a crazy person and i hate talking about them because i find them WAY too gooey. honestly, that’s why they are so long. it’s all the gooeyness!!!!!! 

shortest fic: yes, the answer is the witcher porn again (this silly thing is going to be the answer for many other questions in this little meme but i’m just going to stop talking about it while i’m ahead). the west end is just about 50 words longer and is much better and is a much better and more interesting story. 

most hits: we’re just going to pretend it’s sex and dying in high society, which has the second most hits. this is certainly due to the fact that @wolfstarwarehouse hypes this story a lot for which i am endlessly grateful! 

most kudos: recovery position has the second most kudos so let’s go with that one! i have been very touched by the response to this story, though i do personally like the sequel beachcoma a little more... i understand why not everyone wants to read it because it is a little more bittersweet. but it also comes from my soul. 

most comment threads: the two stories in the source codes series are leading here, because i only posted two chapters at a time so that i would get maximal validation, lol. 

most bookmarks: in order to talk about a story i haven’t talked about yet, the rosary has the fourth-most. i think this fic is truly my r/s swan song... i said everything i wanted to say and did everything i wanted to do. it’s a really good mystery/noir story that i didn’t think i could pull off until i did! and i love the OCs in it who have sort of manifested these secret headcanons for me that i may expostulate upon someday. thank you to @piovascosimo for the inspiration to write it. 

total word count: 1,000,478. lol! 

favorite fic i wrote: cannot possibly choose but probably the top five in order of date posted are: desperado, a handful of dust, doom town, beachcoma, jump into the fire

fic i’d rewrite / expand on: i already said all of source codes because it’s way too gooey, i also could make hard time killing floor blues a lot tighter, and a memoir of the flesh deserves a way better ending because i was rushing to make the yuletide deadline...

share a bit of a WIP: i was trying for a while to write a band of brothers AU where they are vietnam vets who start growing cannabis... based on the steve earle song “copperhead road.” this could have been SO good but the plot was too huge and unwieldy so i gave up. my roommate is obsessed with this idea and keeps asking me how it’s going so i may yet finish. but there’s a bit below the cut.

The knock at the door in the night was a sharp shock, bright as lightning, that sent them both back to Khe Sanh and before. Nix ducked. Dick went behind the doorframe. They kept low into the kitchen, where Nix took his old officer’s pistol out from where he kept it hidden behind the fridge. Then they went to the door, keeping to the edges of the hallways.

On the porch was Liebgott. He could have made his own way in likely right onto the couch without either of them noticing, so it was something that he had knocked on the goddamn door. It was particularly something given that none of the boys from Easy should have known about the grow operation, or even about Dick’s farm, being as Dick’s address on file at the V.A. was a post office box in town and Nix’s was still in Jersey. These considerations were nil to somebody who had spent the better part of five years in the bush of Vietnam. He took a last draw from his cigarette and put it out against the rubber sole of his boot, then he put the butt in his pocket. As far as Nix knew, he hadn’t said a word since January 1970.  

“Joe,” said Dick diplomatically. He put his hand out and Liebgott took it. Then he took Nix’s. He had handsome dark eyes, but they were full of a wall. You could tell he saw you, but it was like nothing followed the necessary channels to the brain to spur emotional response. It had been like this even while he was still talking, and after a while you got used to it.

“You comin' in,” said Nix, knowing he probably would even if he wasn’t invited.

Inside, they all three sat at the kitchen table in silence nobody was about to break. Finally Dick got up and went to the drawer where they kept the rollies and their share of the product. He passed a sheaf of papers and a film canister full of bud to Liebgott across the table. Nix understood as well as Dick apparently did that there would be no getting anything over on this kid, who had eyes in the back and sides of his head. He’d probably had a nice tour of the property before coming inside. “You hungry, son,” Dick said.

Liebgott shook his head. He extracted one of the buds from the canister and inspected it. They did look mighty good if Nix said so himself. They looked artful in Liebgott’s hand. There were black scabs across his knuckles and a dark rime of filth under those fingernails which still existed. He seemed satisfied enough with what he saw to take a paper out of the sheaf and start shredding the flower into it.

“Captain Nixon calls it Easy Diesel,” said Dick, like he was trying to pretend it wasn’t the funniest thing in the world.

Liebgott looked up and a smile flashed across his face like the savage golden light of a flare falling over the far hills. His smile was sort of brutal, like the edge of a knife in a barfight, or like a seething animal. Luckily it went away as quickly as it had come. He rolled the joint with a quick grace and lit the business end with his old silver Zippo Nixon hadn’t seen since the war. There was a skull engraved on one side and on the other it read IF YOU ARE RECOVERING MY BODY, FUCK YOU.

“I don’t know how you found us, Joe,” Dick said thoughtfully. “You don’t have to… tell us. But we ain’t exactly keen to have just anybody here.” He paused and looked quickly to Nix, who tried to make it abundantly clear by means of eyebrows that he wasn’t sure they ought to go down this road, wherever it was leading. Dick ignored him. Liebgott was watching them, fully understanding their attempted clandestine exchange. “We ain’t exactly keen to have the DEA here,” Dick said at last.

The cherry at the end of the joint atomized with a crackling hiss. Liebgott looked between Dick and Nix with extreme seriousness sullied only by his exhaling a dignified white cloud out his nose. Then he nodded, once, curtly, demonstrating he understood his orders as they had been relayed.

Nix flashed Dick what he thought was a what have you done type look. But Dick looked totally unbothered. He should have gone into this business years ago for how violently unflappable he was. He said to Liebgott, “I’ll get some blankets and you can make up the couch.”

Liebgott shook his head to say no need. He got up, careful not to scrape the chair against the floor, shook each of their hands again, and in less than a minute’s time he was back out the door with nothing more than what he’d come in with except the joint.

Nix and Dick, on the porch, listening to the crickets, watched him disappear into the darkness.

“Are we hallucinating,” said Nix eventually.

“I sure as hell hope not,” Dick replied. “We’ve got to ship all that product or we’ll starve.”

-

In the morning Nix was in the field, inspecting the plants. Liebgott was standing there at his quarter for god knew how long before he cleared his throat and Nix jumped about six feet in the air. There was a smirk shifting across Liebgott’s face that he would have been better about hiding when Nix had been his commanding officer. He looked like he hadn't slept. Back over there he had looked like that a lot, but it had been different, because of all the uppers they were taking. He cocked his head back over toward the long driveway and then he was off across the dew-wet grass which had already soaked through the hems of his canvas pants and his destroyed shoes.

Nix followed, like a duckling behind a hen. Liebgott still walked as though there were eyes in all sides of his head quickly processing information as he moved. Nix doubted you ever lost that kind of skill, even if in the real world it made you look like a mental patient. He caught up so they could walk side by side through the dew-wet grass. “What did you think,” he asked Liebgott.

Liebgott passed Nix the universal sign of furrowed brow that meant please clarify.

Nix gestured with pinched fingers to his own mouth as though Liebgott were also deaf. “The grass.”

He shaped his hand into an a-ok sign.

“You get any sleep?”

He nodded an infinitesimal nod, like the answer was a secret just for Nix to know.

“Well if you think it could be better just tell me how.”

Nix had had a high school friend whose sister was deaf from scarlet fever and whom he had watched on occasion communicate with her by means of sign language. Early on, back over there, he had sent off to command for a book, but by the time it came he understood it wasn’t that Liebgott couldn’t speak, he just didn’t want to. It was something like how people’s hair supposedly turned white if they witnessed some evil thing, or how people became ascetics in the name of god. If you were really fucked up on drugs or fear or otherwise, or if the natural magical thinking from childhood hadn’t been fully beaten out of you, you might have seen it as the sacrifice he had given to the forest for letting him out without a scratch so many goddamn times. It had been a bit of a trial to explain this to Spiers, who was practical almost to a fault, sometimes.

Liebgott showed another a-ok sign. Then he did a thumbs up which Nix knew meant it was good.

All in all it was smart. If he was still talking, Nix might have asked him, what have you been up to? You been sleeping on the street? You been to the V.A.? What did they tell you? And the answer would’ve been nothing good. Instead they just walked in the cool grass together in the sunshine and the morning was beautiful, and the air was sweet. It was all lovely until Liebgott had to physically stop him, laughing, somehow silently but also hysterically, from stepping right onto the razor-thin tripwire stretched invisibly across the dark gravel.

In the kitchen, Dick was doing the numbers. He took his glasses off when Nix came in and put the coffee on. “He learned a thing or two from Charlie,” Nix said, leaning against the counters.

“Who, Joe?”

“Our driveway is thoroughly ratfucked.”

“Hmm,” said Dick. He put the glasses back on and turned back to the accounting book. He was going to do this whole thing as above board as was humanly possible. The vivid daylight came through the window and struck the lens of his unstylish Ray-Bans and threw a kind of prism of color upon the white paper and the chicken-scratch sums. Nix felt like maybe this was something you would paint if you had the necessary implements and artistic ability. “Maybe we should see if we can get any more help.”

-

He was mildly ashamed to say it, but the doc had always kind of creeped Nix out. He imagined a hypothetical conversation with Dick, who he knew loved the kid, almost like a son: Listen, don’t get me wrong, he’s a good kid, I owe him my life, yadda yadda. But either he’s dropped the brown acid one too many times or the voodoo exorcism went FUBAR.

The doc had arrived on the farm on the heels of Sunshine and Rainbows, aka Mr. Bright Eyed and Bushy Tailed, aka one Edward “Babe” Heffron. Nix had written Babe in South Philly, being as he was a connoisseur of bud and once upon a time had been famed among their company for smoking anything anyone put in his hand, often to his own detriment. The operation was getting big enough that Nix needed another pair of hands, other than Liebgott, of course, who was still fortifying the long driveway whilst giving away his cover by playing Led Zeppelin IV as loudly as was possible. It was a tough calculation, because Babe was a genius of pot, but he couldn’t keep a damn secret, and lo and behold he had dragged along with him a dark shadow in the human form of Eugene Roe. They came up the driveway in a big old Ford pickup that rattled its rust off in the potholes. Liebgott had dismantled the traps specially for their arrival when they had called from Williamsport to say they were an hour out.

“I figured we could use a medical professional to lend some credibility to the operation,” said Babe thoughtfully, sparking a joint on the porch over sweating jam jars of iced tea.

Roe snorted or something but it wasn’t really a normal person’s self-effacing laugh. Winters clapped his back. Nixon knew Roe had dropped out of medical school after two years but there was no need to say anything. Everyone knew that. Now he was working construction and Babe claimed to be working as a mechanic in a garage, but this seemed suspect given the state of the car they had driven up in.

“Well we sure as hell are glad you boys are here,” said Dick magnanimously.

Babe exhaled an opaque cloud that rivaled Nix’s own father’s ability with a stogie. “Can we see the bush?”

They went out all together to the field and ducked between the rows of corn. Babe knelt in the soil. It was damp with dew and quiet in here. It would have been almost like over there except it smelled good. “What’s the cross,” Babe said, inspecting the plants.

“It’s an indica blend…”

“Well, I can tell that,” he said.

“So you’re an expert on the plant now too?”

“I’ve just smoked an awful lot of joints in my life, Captain Nixon.”

Roe snorted again. When they all looked to him he said, “You said in the letter there was some kind of altruistic reason for all this.”

“It’s medicine, Gene,” Babe said gently, but also like they had had this conversation thirty thousand times. Nix filed away for later the intimation that Roe had read the letter he’d sent Babe at home in South Philadelphia.

“I guess you don’t remember the psychic break you had at the Do Lung Bridge.”

Babe waved this remark off, even though Nix remembered it too. It threw a chill down his back, like a water balloon had hit him at the base of his neck. “That was laced,” Babe said.

“With what!”

“I don’t know! Something bad!” Babe turned to Dick and Nix. “Gene’s teetotal,” he said, like this was a big old point of contention.

So that counted out the bad acid. Maybe he was just like this. Maybe he had had those big sad bug eyes as a child or an infant or a fetus in the womb. “Good on you, Doc,” Nix said.

“I ain’t trying it,” Roe said, folding his arms over his narrow chest, “no matter what it does.”

The doc was a tough cookie. Babe had claimed, over there, about as high as the Byrds song, that the doc came from a long line of the kind of folks described in Dr. John’s “Gris-Gris Gumbo Ya Ya” and that, as such, he could heal wounds with his mind. When it didn’t work, as on the night when Jackson died, or the night when Hoobler died, or in the forest when Muck and Penkala died, or the night when Liebgott stopped speaking, he went to sit for a while on the edge of camp until Dick went over and made him eat something. Nix watched them in a state of confused envy, and then he went to write the letters to the families, so that Dick wouldn’t have to.

At dusk, after they ate a light dinner of corn on the cob and rice and beans, he took the boys up into the hayloft with an armful of blankets. “Sorry this is the best we got,” he said. He had said that about a hundred god damn times since they got here.

Roe looked like he wanted to say, you’ve got to stop apologizing for everything. Instead he said, “Where does Lieb sleep.”

Babe perked up. “Joe’s here?”

“You didn’t see him in the driveway?”

Nix sighed. “He’s gonna want to know what he did wrong that you saw him,” he said.

“Does he still — ”

Nix shook his head. “Not a peep.”

In a couple days time, he couldn’t take it anymore, and he was hot and tired and stoned, up to his elbows in earth in the field, showing Babe how to replant the hatchlings he’d grown from seed. “You guys room together or what?”

“Me and Gene?” Babe’s eyes were red in the corners from smoking and from the sun. “What about you and Dick?”

Dick, who had the radio on inside turned up as loud as it would go, so that they would hear it in the field, playing Crosby Stills and Nash doing “Suite: Judy Blue Eyes.” “What about me and Dick?” said Nix.

Babe was a smart kid. He realized this was going nowhere. With muddy hands he popped one of the seedlings out of its little pot and cradled it into the ground. “Well, I think he thinks he’s looking after me, but in actuality, I am looking after him.”

[stuartja06-blog]

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[dweemeister]

When Worlds Collide (1951)

Stop-motion animator György Pál Marczincsak garnered pan-European fame for his pioneering Puppetoons series of short films in the 1930s. Sensing tumult in continental Europe, he fled his native Hungary to Britain as the Nazis rose to power in Germany. With the assistance of Walter Lantz (the creator of Woody Woodpecker), he moved to the United States, changed his name to George Pal, and attained American citizenship. In America, Puppetoons resumed with Paramount Pictures’ financing until 1948. Puppetoons, unlike most stop-motion films, utilized “replacement animation” – a form of stop-motion animation where a new hand-carved, wooden puppet would be used for each photographed frame rather than modifying the same figure for each successive frame. Though Paramount discontinued the series due to its increasing costs, Pal nevertheless remained in good standing with the moviegoing public and the studio’s executives. Transitioning from an animator/director to producer, George Pal took an interest in a genre that – since the silent era’s end – had been relegated to low-budget serial films and comic book stands.

As the world’s nations shuffled to take sides for the Cold War, the United States and the Soviet Union’s greatest engineering and scientific minds were imagining new possibilities in aerospace. The renewed interest in space flight and scientific discovery led to Paramount’s Destination Moon (1950), produced by Pal. Destination Moon was the first film released by a major American studio to consider a speculative human landing on the Moon. For Pal’s follow-up, he purchased a science fiction property gathering dust at Paramount. The property: When Worlds Collide, based on Edwin Balmer and Philip Wylie’s novel of the same name. With acclaimed cinematographer Rudolph Maté (1928’s The Passion of Joan of Arc, 1940’s Foreign Correspondent) as director and providing aesthetic expertise, When Worlds Collide is the origin of all subsequent apocalyptic movies where a celestial body smashes into another celestial body. In two inconsistent films that deem their characters’ humanity as secondary, George Pal rejuvenated an entire film genre in the United States – and Hollywood has never looked back.

In South Africa, astronomer Dr. Emery Bronson (Hayden Rorke) instructs American pilot David Randall (Richard Derr) to pass along confidential, unsealed photographs and research to his American counterpart, Dr. Cole Hendron (Larry Keating). Drs. Bronson and Hendron will warn the United Nations Security Council (UNSC) that a star named Bellus will strike and destroy Earth within a year. Shortly before the projected impact, Bellus’ sole orbiting planet, Zyra, will pass by Earth close enough to wreak gravitational and geologic devastation before the Earth’s ultimate destruction. Bronson and Hendron thus propose the construction of human spaceships – “arks” – to transport human survivors to Zyra just before Bellus arrives. The astronomers are not taken seriously by the UNSC. However, private donors such as wheelchair-bound businessman Sidney Stanton (John Hoyt) provide the necessary funds for the ark’s construction. 

Various arks are assembled across Earth, but When Worlds Collide concentrates on the effort spearheaded by Drs. Bronson and Hendron and financed by Stanton. This American ark will also include co-pilot, Dr. George Frye (Stephen Chase), and Dr. Hendron’s daughter/assistant, Joyce (Barbara Rush). Joyce is attracted to David because 1950s science-fiction films always seem to have an obligatory romance.

With an acting lineup filled with B-movie stalwarts and future television stars (who may be recognizable by those who know their ‘50s-‘70s television), When Worlds Collide is hindered by stiff line readings and an emphasis on the mission rather than its human characters. Screenwriter Sydney Boehm (1952’s The Atomic City, 1953’s The Big Heat) has written a procedural screenplay, one where decisions about the ark’s construction, its flightpath, and the selection of its passengers are the film’s primary drama. From that screenplay, only John Hoyt, as the irascible Sydney Stanton, distinguishes himself in the film with his patrician sneering. Disaster films and invasion literature during and prior to the mid-twentieth century typically did not privilege individual viewpoints, and that trends continues in When Worlds Collide.

That is to the film’s benefit and its detriment. It is a mechanical motion picture, with the occasional reminders that humanity, collectively, is staring down its certain destruction. Once Drs. Bronson and Hendron have made their presentation to the UNSC, every character in the film is henceforth defined by the looming apocalypse. Whatever lives they lived outside their work are extinguished in service of constructing the arks. All over the construction facility, numerous signs read:

WASTE ANYTHING EXCEPT TIME TIME IS OUR SHORTEST MATERIAL

The privileged few tasked with the ark’s construction and its piloting are but a fraction of a fraction of humanity. Even among the several hundred persons (unsurprisingly, due to a complete lack of imagination, they are all white) involved, everyone reacts differently to the situation they all share. Some are despairing, believing they have not lived a fulfilling life; some commit to their final purpose, subsuming their emotions in service of a space age Noah’s ark; some are possessive, concluding that their involvement with the ark makes them more worthy than others to embark the ship come doomsday. With precision, the elements comprising the ark’s first and final flight are assembled. Perhaps the most unrealistic aspect of When Worlds Collide is the uncritical adherence to the scientists by the faceless masses who construct the ark (the scientists’ hand-picked survivors are few, but these individuals’ placement on the ark is somehow never questioned). Interpersonal and inter-group conflict does not appear until far later than is realistic – the film’s romantic triangle is devoid of comprehensible motivation other than the fact that the film’s top-billed actor and actress should end up together somehow. Anyways, When Worlds Collide is not depicting a humanity akin to Star Trek at its most utopian. Thus, one must assume there will be at least some level of destructive human ego that confounds the ultimate task. Here the film falters, as the characters become the means to the end.

Maté and Pal choose not to show Zyra’s passing and Bellus’ catastrophic impact. Only their aftermaths are shown. On paper, any similar decision in a modern apocalyptic movie would be hounded across the Internet – but it works for When Worlds Collide. Here, the aftermath of Zyra’s passing is portrayed in a montage of film miniatures, matte paintings (mostly of the ark and its surroundings), and tactful slow-motion. With no computer-generated imagery to assist these scenes, the special effects team outdo themselves. Special effects artists Harry Barndollar (1946’s Cloak and Dagger, 1956’s The Ten Commandments) and Gordon Jennings (1942’s Reap the Wild Wind, 1953’s War of the Worlds) contributed to the miniature-heavy montage of Zyra’s approach. Their colleague, artist Chesley Bonestell (known as the “Father of Modern Space art”, Bonestell also worked on 1941’s Citizen Kane, Destination Moon, and 1953’s War of the Worlds) provided the novel idea of the ark beginning its launch on a one-mile mostly horizontal ramp (the miniature of this ramp was an enormous 700 feet long) rather than the conventional vertical launch.

Zyra’s approach is visceral terror in its timing (the effects are felt several seconds after scientific projections), sharp editing, and mass bedlam. Where the impacting sun will vaporize the Earth’s remaining inhabitants instantly, the passing planet will leave survivors left to wander or repair, perhaps futilely, the pre-apocalyptic wreckage. When Worlds Collide’s final minutes are special effects wizardry, partially redeeming the film of its ill-conceived storytelling and sketchy science. Yet, there could have been more in the film’s final minutes. George Pal envisioned a scene featuring an ark miniature resting on the surface of Zyra. Due to success of Destination Moon, Paramount expedited When Worlds Collide and rejected Pal’s request for an additional $5,000 (almost $50,000 in 2020’s USD) to cap off the Zyra scene. This forced Pal to utilize a Bonestell concept painting instead for Zyra’s surface – and it is too obviously concept art.

When Worlds Collide solidified George Pal as one of Hollywood’s best producers, and Pal already set his eyes on a sequel: After Worlds Collide (based on the novel’s sequel of the same name). But the failure of Conquest of Space (1955) led Paramount to nix the idea. The coming decade saw the Space Race between the Soviet Union and the United States and an explosion in American science-fiction films. Whether these 1950s sci-fi features contained spacefaring, exploration, or alien invasions, they invariably influenced succeeding entries into the genre that have made it dominant in contemporary Hollywood. George Pal, as a producer uniquely suited to special effects animation, became a science fiction and fantasy film innovator in the second half of his career. When Worlds Collide, though seemingly primeval compared to its sci-fi contemporaries a decade or so after, was fortuitous in its timing and for having George Pal as its producer.

My rating: 7/10

^ Based on my personal imdb rating. Half-points are always rounded down. My interpretation of that ratings system can be found in the “Ratings system” page on my blog (as of July 1, 2020, tumblr is not permitting certain posts with links to appear on tag pages, so I cannot provide the URL).

For more of my reviews tagged “My Movie Odyssey”, check out the tag of the same name on my blog.

[ibitchytimemachine]

VBO Mini Bang Round-Up

I know that I had mini reviews of the art for the @vegebulocracy Big Bang this past winter, but there are SO MANY stories and pieces of artwork for the mini that I just can’t (minus one). What I will say is that the talent and artwork that was presented in this event was just amazing, and I am not sure I could pick a favorite nearly as easily as I did for the Big Bang! One thing that did bother me with SEVERAL of the stories, it the fact that they are broken into multiple parts. Not so much that they are broken up, but the fact that they are broken up in a way that doesn’t have a satisfying close to one part of the story. If you are gonna write for an event like this I think it is SUPER important to bring your story to some sort of conclusion, even if you don’t finish the story, just so people feel satisfied at the end. That is really one of my biggest criticisms of several of the works here. So with that out of the way,  lets jump into the stories! There are probably spoilers below, so beware! (I’ll try to keep them light)

Dive

@rockykelboa

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 13,448

This is a fun little one shot written as though you are watching a movie. I really got a tarantino-esque feel reading this story. The dialogue had that irreverent dark humor feel to it. Nothing was sacred and everything a joke. I really love the way characters interact with each other. The smutty sex scene is steamy and goddamn Bulma is bad…. Also something about the thought of Raditz listening in on them does things to me. I love the twist, and she sets it up so nicely in the story. If you are not thinking about the end game, you probably won’t even see it coming, but little things Bulma does and says throughout the story really set up the twist ending nicely. I feel like the delivery is a bit forced and feels a little out of place. But overall the story is very well written and I am honestly not sure I can give any reasons for anyone to not read it.

Blinded

@scarletraven1001

Rating: Teen

Word Count: 14,765

What happens when blind dates go wrong, and then oh-so right? And then maybe wrong again? This story is funny, sweet, and over all a wild ride. I have said it probably a million times, but I will say it again, I love how she incorporates nods to canon into her fics. And there are so many “easter eggs” in this story. I like how it doesn’t take itself seriously. It’s a dry humor but completely not dark. And Damn does this fic feel like the slowest burn ever. The whole first four chapters happen in one night but never have I needed them to get to the point more than reading this story. She builds the tension in the date night really nicely. Then you get the raging of the end of chapter 4. I know when I read it all I wanted to do was slam my fists against the keyboard. Another A+ story definitely worth your time reading.

Life at the Edge of a Blade

@bearstarseraphffxi

Rating: General Audiences

Word Count: 20,459

Reading this was like reading the weirdest filler episode ever. The plot is odd but shockingly believable in the DragonBall Verse. I mean if they had episodes dedicated to baseball between universes, I am sure they would get Vegeta figure skating in direct competition with Yamcha. Bear’s characterizations were done quite well. I really can’t think of a character that the author didn’t peg. There were some funny moments too, I remember at least once laughing out loud. There is some fluff between V/B but no romance really. It is a very dry piece, and a lot of the writing feels very technical, but if you like really canon characterizations and if you are interested in reading a piece that could really be a several episode filler for the three year gap, you may enjoy this one.

Within

Blacksheep115

Rating: Teen

Word Count: 11,020

Gosh, what an interesting story! In general I am in love with the interesting ideas blacksheep has in her stories. This is a story that could very well fit in the canon, it occurs during the three year gap and it really doesn’t follow a story about them as a couple, although there are some QUITE STEAMY moments in it (but no sex).Speaking of...I love the idea of Vegeta using his sexual energy against Bulma. You read so many fics of Bulma going after Vegeta and really amping up the sex appeal to get him to do things, but the idea of him pouring water all over himself ‘cause he knows she is watching him and later pinning her and using her attraction for him against her… just A+ and so in character for him. I don’t wanna give away the twist ending cause GODDAMN it is so good and unexpected… and just wow.. You really gotta read it.

#badman

@1vulgarwoman

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 17,319

So I love everything I have ever read from 1vulgarwoman, she writes such fun pieces and I came into this one with images of Heavy Lifting and Fundamentals of Chemistry in mind. I loved the way the plot and the romantic subplot were equally interesting. The world was rich and vibrant, humor was on point. The handling of character relationships and interactions in this fic were done fantastically well. And then the smut scenes. I think anyone who has ever read any of her fics know that when it’s time for the smut, you need to prepare yo’ body cause its about to get real. She does not disappoint, with a STEAMY sexting/Facetime scene and then the last half of the last chapter is just splooshworthy. I will say that talking only about the smut really downplays the greatness of the rest of this fic though, and I would 1,000 percent recc this to anyone.

Z-Men

Super_Saiyanerd

Rating: Teen

Word Count: 8,290

I have some pretty big issues with this piece. As my faithful readers are probably aware, I really have a hard time with crossovers, because so often it is two things I love mashed together, and the spark that makes the things great is lost. That is one of the problems with this piece. It didn’t feel like either a Dragon Ball AU or an X-Men AU. But the biggest issue I have with this piece is scope and flow. This author is trying to tackle too much in the time and word limit provided. We are working on a love story between Vegeta and Bulma, but also the whole of the Dark Phoenix saga. It’s just too broad and because of that the flow is off. There are huge time jumps that don’t make sense, and while I get that we are seeing little vignettes of the story, it is confusing. I would have liked to nix the Phoenix storyline and go with OC X-Men, that are based off of the traits of the Dragon Ball characters. Bulma would make a great Beast for example. But then explore the characters relationships through a much simpler plot than anything Phoenix related.

War Thunder

@jonahwhalesw1

Rating: Explicit

Word Count:24,994

So this is a WWII all human AU. There are some really nice things going on set up for the plot, however it just never kicks in. We are 25,000 words into the story and most of the writing has been about sexual tension between Bulma and Vegeta. Now don’t get me wrong, I like a build up of sexual tension, it really makes the pay off of when they finally kiss or fuck or whatever they are gonna do so much better. I wish that maybe BSV had slowed down the romantic plot of this fic a bit and interspersed more of the other parts of the plot. Or maybe written some interactions that built up their attraction in a nonsexual way. It feels very Porn without Plot to me right now, and it is because the romantic plot is so in your face. I really want to know more about what the war is doing to the community. What kinds of changes in our history does having the Colds on planet and fighting with Nazis? Is there gonna be an extermination of Saiyans? I feel like with some of those war time plot bunnies thrown into the mix the story would feel more vibrant and alive, cause right now it is PWP, but also without porn at this point in the story. It was a fun read, it just left me wanting more.

Elusion

@piccoloisgreen

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 19,550

So, I fucking loved this story. It shared shocking similarities to some of the ideas and themes in my story, which I loved reading about. I love the Bulma in captivity trope apparently. I really dont want to give too much away, but I love the beginning of the fic, this idea that they are instantly attracted to each other and there is no real dancing around the subject and they are just diving right into it is nice. I am not sure if it is because of the word count restrictions, or time limit or what, but I felt like the jump from the escape to the first death was a shocking break. I would have liked to see more of what was happening during those lost years. I appreciate the surprise of the killer, and their abilities, and I feel like it wrapped up nicely, but the beginning of the last chapter felt so rushed and leaves me wanting more information about thought processes and feelings. Overall, a fantastic fic, and worth your time to read.

Healing

@starrcrossrose

Rating: Mature

Word Count:

So when I first read this fic I was amazed at how well Starcross emoted. So many of the paragraphs just felt like being right inside Vegeta’s head as he was descending in this spiral of self loathing. The formatting choices were a nice touch, to show how he is quarreling within himself. I like the idea also of Bulma NOT being so happy go lucky and needing this kind of comfort. She is for all intents and purposes in canon alone so much. Yamcha comes around sure, but her friends are really never around. So she is alone a lot and life gets sad when you are alone. I think she caught this feeling and nuance really well. I really enjoy this story, it follows the timeline of canon pretty well, so if you aren’t super into AUs this is a good choice for you. It is pretty angsty, and with a title like Healing, you probably think it will have a happy ending, but if you think this has a happy ending, you haven’t been paying attention.

A Mermaid’s Tale

DBZVB1991

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 15,740

This is a Book One situation here. And the entirety of this submission is just setting up the intrigue of the story. I had mentioned in the Big Bang that it makes me nervous when I see crossovers between two things I love because so often it is just a mish mash of the flavors of two worlds that don’t go together. I do think that DBZVB1991 worked hard on worldbuilding a believable crossover world between the two. It is way more Dragon Ball than Little Mermaid and I am OK with that honestly.  For most of the fic they follow The Little Mermaid storyline  pretty closely. There are one or two plot bunnies that are different than TLM, but mostly it follows the plot pretty closely. I like where I think it may be going, but really it is so hard to review this properly because the story just hasn’t even really started yet. This is a story that is worth a read, but feels unsatisfying mostly because of how unfinished it is at the moment.

Beatae Memoriae

@ambrosiaswhispers

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 15, 724

This is absolutely an amazing fic. The story follows Vegeta through losing his memory, and it just freaking brings the feels. Tashana really knows how to craft an emotionally charged story, and she brings bits of the canon back in a very organic way that doesn’t drag the piece down. There is a squidgeta cameo in the piece, so if you are into my wiggly boi, you are in luck! The pacing of this story is on point, she nails both sweet family man Vegeta AND feral angry Vegeta perfectly. I wanted more of the interactions of Gohan and Goten with Bra, but dammit I am so glad she didn’t give it to me, cause I feel like it would have damaged the pacing. This story was crafted so beautifully, and it is one that gives you this little insight into their lives and leaves you wanting more - but doesn’t drag on so you get tired of reading. Fantastically done, you really should go read it cause it is amazing.

Captive

@janxangel

Rating: Teen

Word Count: 24,979

SO one thing that I noticed while reading this fic is how BAD ASS the women are in the story. Like good grief, Chi Chi and Launch were just KILLER (Bulma too, but we are used to seeing her be cool)I like that this is a story with no romantic plotline. Like they are working together not because they wanna bone, but because it is the most strategic thing to do. And Janx writes strategy really well. I felt like the fight scenes drug on a little long, and I would have liked them to be shorter and interlaced with more emotion, instead of blow by blow. Plus I think with the word limitations they could have gotten more bang for their buck with some better wrap up. I wish that things had turned out a little differently, the events on Namek were so similar to canon, and I wonder what could have happened differently than canon with this AU. Overall a fun and easy read, if not a little dry - definitely something that I would recommend to someone who is not interested in a romantic plotline.

Revel (In Our Time)

@jadefyre

Rating: Explicit

Word Count:19,979

Ok so this has a full story arc and whoa buddy is it a doozy. Its intriguing, cause there is this wonderful mishmash of all these fantastic post-apocalyptic cyber-punky worlds and it just works really really well together. From the Big Brother aspect of 1984 to the Ghost in the Machine philosophy that spawned so much, it captures that feel of the grey maddening world. I loved and hated the first chapter, cause I thought the whole story would be written this way (which would make a really cool story BTW, just really hard to follow cause you have to really pay attention). I love the world, I love the plot and intrigue and how DARK it is, I love the mini romance, but I REALLY love the twist. I mean you kinda see it coming, but hope it doesn’t happen, but it is perfect cause it closes the story well, and then leaves you NEEDING the next part of the series. Really fantastic job, yall should read this one definitely.

Legends

LeonaHart

Rating:mature

Word Count: 6,172

When the outlines were dropped this was one that i was dying to read. I am super intrigued by this idea of the Saiyan creation myth. I am curious how the Vegeta destruction God and Bulma creation Goddess could come around later as some sort of destined lovers trope. I really liked the nods to cannon (omg buu being the God of Destructions bubblegum is awesome) i wish it was finished, so i have a hard time really commenting much more on it, but i definitely hope it gets finished cause it has such an interesting premise. I also have to say that while I like the story, the writing feels very proper and antiquated. Now it may very well be that this is a style choice because of the story, but I struggled with it a little. 

The Dark Prince

EmbarrassedButKinky (I tried to @superbandanna but Tumblr sucks)

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 18,241

The very first chapter of Dark Prince had me so nostalgic for Obsidian. The demon pact to save the company(world), the ability for Bulma to be taken care of “magically”. Then it splintered into this interesting mix of like… underworld mafia hitmen meets Death Note. I think that EBK is on point with all her references, something she does really well in her fics. I know a lot of people really liked this fic, but it just fell flat for me. Don’t get me wrong, it had some wonderful moments, and wonderfully smutty! It just felt so rushed. It was too insta-love for me, and I wished the development of the Ray betrayal scene, subsequent rescue and the aftermath all could have been developed and drawn out more. I liked this story, but coming from the writer of Stages of a Claim (my absolute favorite of hers, fight me) I just expected this to be a little more developed and polished.

Aspara, Queen of Sadala

@lisac1965-blog

Rating: Mature

Word Count:15,922

I liked this one. It is based off the book of Esther and I wish she would have adapted the story a little more to fit the characters better. Bulma seemed out of character a bit and I imagine her relying more on her own brains and technology to bring people through rough times than a God. I do think this book of the Bible works well as a VegeBul adaptation though, and except for a few things I really think lisa did a good job with it. The flow was mostly really good, I feel like she was battling word count, or maybe time limits cause some things felt so rushed. While I understand she is remaining faithful to the source, I wish some more creative liberties were taken. For example, I would either omit the Zarbon/Dodoria plot line and focus on Ray being the big baddie, he seems to just come out of nowhere as the bad guy and I wish there had been more foreshadowing of him being a douche than just “There are a lot of Saiyans who want to exterminate humans” The story however was very fun to read. Descriptors were vivid and made the world feel more real. The relationship felt forced, but honest - true, cause hell it was forced. The Epilogue of sorts was nice cause you got to see how their relationship developed and grew. Overall a quick, simple read that was fun!

Sanguinary

@ibitchytimemachine

Rating:Explicit

Word Count: 21,309

So this is my piece for the Mini Bang, and since I am biased, I will just tell you a little about the piece. It was inspired by RPG’s like Dungeons and Dragons (and you nerds out there may catch some of the DnD easter eggs I put in there) and epic fantasy. My main thought was, what if Bulma and Vegeta’s roles were completely reversed? So we tell the story of their lives with the idea that Bulma was in the PTO for years, while Vegeta has been living peacefully on his home planet. Not everything is OK on Vegeta-sei though, so trouble is brewing. As with a role reversal story, this is told through the eyes of the opposite person, AKA Vegeta. This is the first part in a trilogy that I have named Surgere et Cadere, and the next installment will be called Imperium. This first part follows us through the story of Vegeta and Bulma’s meeting, and the consequences of her being on Vegeta-sei. I really hope you enjoy my submission!

So I know that I had a top three for the Big Bang, but there are SO MANY fics for the Mini, I am gonna do a top five!! It was really hard to pick these, cause there are some really fantastic stories for this event!! In no particular order, the pieces that I think are the best 5 are:  Beatae Memoriae, by @ambrosiaswhispers, Elusion by @piccoloisgreen,  Revel (In Our Time) by @jadefyre, #badman by @1vulgarwoman and Sanguinary by ME ;P! 

[drkoestersmithrpg]

What To Expect When You’re Expecting (To Be Rawdogged by Tony Stark)

Chapter 1 

It took a year to work up the nerve to proposition Tony.

Not to say that they CRUSH went on for a year – oh no – the crush had been MUCH longer than that – for FAR longer than Peter was even legal.  But Peter was legal, now, and little did Iron Man  know, Spiderman had spent the year <i>preparing</i> to for the moment he hit up Tony Stark.

He lay out all his plans carefully in his mind.  He executed them with precision.  He lost his V-card.  He got laid. He got instructed, by instructors both erudite and dubious, in the oral arts.

But more than anything, he read a LOT of A03.

He read x y z just go on and on and on..

He did NOT head for the Tony Stark RP fic (although there was much – so, so much) but how could he NOT, in the middle of an epic [insert name here] ball massaging fic, peep into what A03 THOUGHT Tony Stark would be like in bed??

After all, that was ALL Peter Parker thought about.

He didn’t stay there long (after all MOST of A03 seemed to think Tony Stark liked Cap – in THAT way) because it all seemed so ridiculous.  Even the occasional pieces that caught his eye that paired Tony with Spiderman (who, for reasons Peter never understood, EVERYONE believed was a stark-white blonde.)

But mostly, Peter went on A03 to ask questions.

Not on A03, of course, but on Tumblr, the A03 gossip site.  All under the guise of being a writer, of course (his user name was notAblonde24) he asked questions.

He asked lots, and lots of questions.

“How should my character ask this other character he if likes him THAT way?”  “What arguments could a younger character make if an older character argued  age difference”  and “How should my younger character indicate to his older lover that is he is not a virgin but STILL has a case of the nerves?”

But, more important, more than any other question:  “What do guys say to each other?  (In bed?)”

The answers ranged from the plausible to the patently ridiculous.  

Did any of those A03 answers do him ANY good in the end?  Peter would never tell – but after a year of entertaining answers (both the ones he read and the ones he heard in his head) he had probably used none of them.

He never verbally propositioned Tony.  He just waited until they were alone (NOT easy, it took weeks) and waited until Tony dropped one of his inappropriate innuendos (that took less than a minute) and simply grabbed him by the face and kissed him.

(And used his superior strength to push Tony up against the way and have his way for a few minutes – if he was going to get rejected he was going to find out a few things for himself first.  That possibility, the possibility of forcing himself on Tony, that idea he DID get from A03. VERY few of those fix remembered that Spiderman was naturally stronger than most of the Avengers- but those fics that did???  Oh my.)

But Tony didn’t reject him. Other than one snarky comment (“How long have you been saving that?”  “Since the day you stopped calling me “Underoos”)  Tony seemed enthusiastic, until, of course, they were interrupted.  

But thanks to texting,  crowds didn’t bother them.  Even in a room full of X Y and Z Peter and Tony, via phone, made plans for their first assignation.

Peter honestly didn’t have any plans after that  (Peter was honestly just hoping Tony would take him seriously enough for a hookup, he never dreamed Tony would take him seriously enough for anything else.)

And yet here they were.

Wherever “here” was.

This was the problem with Superheroes Dating, Peter found.  In-between his insane college-AND-work schedule and Tony’s insane Tony-Is-Insane schedule, they had exactly two date nights a week, and only one of those was what Tony called “Ironclad” (meaning he would let NO Stark-related business intrude upon it, a promise which he, touchingly, kept.)

Even though those “date nights” consisted entirely of Netflix-And-Chill (which meant in between sex they would lounge on the couch, Peter doing homework on his laptop while Tony rubbed his feet and watched Netflix) they were times that Peter craved and treasured.

But crime, sadly, knew nothing about Datenight.

It was several months into the relationship, whatever it was, that Peter began to get frustrated.

The sex was epic, no doubt. (Peter even employed a few tidbits he picked up on A03 – after an intense online discussion with a popular A03 writer [and ACTUAL gay man, a decided minority] Peter had learned to describe the relaxing  and tightening of specific muscles.  With very little practice on Tony, Peter had learned to milk his cock.  The look on Tony’s face, to say the least, was very rewarding. He also enjoyed the practice he read about involving looking over his shoulder and looking Tony in the eye.  But as for the pillow talk he had so meticulously researched, he sued none of it.  He could never work up the nerve.) 

But after the sex the REGULAR talk was ONLY about homework or the lameness of whatever show was on Netflix.  

And on their very few ventures outside Stark Tower the conversation was nill.  Outside the safety of the Tower walls Tony was like a comedian on a stage – all jokes and lewd remarks.  After months of dating, Peter was beginning to marvel out how very little talking they actually managed to do.

Not that Tony behaved that way in bed – Peter had nixed that on their very first night together.  Now Tony was very quiet in bed – almost too quiet – except for compliments.  

Peter was a little disappointed – he did want SOME talking in bed, maybe some of the lovely things he had read online.

But not tonight- tonight Peter was just royally pissed.

Datenight was absolutely shot – the Avengers were assembled in DC and taking on a villain who was threatening major buildings – and Peter was invited and missing it all because he was making up a chemistry final.  

And why was he making up a chemistry final??  Because when he was supposed to be taking his chemistry final he had been chasing a local car thief around Brooklyn.

Now here he was, trudging back to his dorm room on datenight – ALONE -  all because Tony insisted that “School comes first” because of a test he only missed because he was busy being the Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman.

“DAMN that Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman, GODdamn that Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman, goddamn that Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman to fucking hell,” Peter swore under his breath (see, he COULD curse.  And if he COULD curse, then he COULD talk dirty.  As long as there were never any other people around.)  

Back in his dormroom was no better – his roommate was bitching about something entirely trivial while Peter swore inwardly over and over and over, watching the time pass on the clock and reviewing it all in his head – he COULD have been in DC by now if he had left THEN, but he WASN’T in DC and it was Too Late Now.  He COULD have been getting GREAT After-The-Battle sex from Iron Man but NO he was stuck in his dormroom with his now-snoring roommate and he was horny and frustrated and PISSED.

Which is why he dove into his bottom bunk, pulled up the covers, opened up his laptop and dove into A03 for the first time in ages.

He went straight for the Tony Stark porn – why not???  X and Y and hell even twincest whatthehellever.  He plunged into tags he did even know the meaning too – which is how he wound up in a unlikely-but-very-hot ABO fic (he never did figure out what an ABO was but he figured it was an AU of SOME sort.)  He was three chapters into a carefully detailed threeway when Tony turned to Cap (who was a coffee shop owner of some sort?) and asked to be penetrated.  “Please,” fic-Tony was panting.  “I’ve wanted it for so long, but I didn’t know how to ask….”

“Oh please,” Peter moaned out loud.  “As if Tony wouldn’t be willing to joke about…”

Peter shut the laptop with a snap, his eyes opened wide.

 Then he sat up so hard he smashed his head against the top bunk (his snoring roommate never noticed.)

He poured himself out of his lower bunk and sat on the floor in complete darkness, dumbfounded.  And when he caught his breath a flood of information filled his brain like a tsunami.  

The dirty jokes – AH GOD the dirty jokes.  Loud and often and embarrassing.  Starting the day Peter had casually announced he had celebrated his birthday in Boys Town and had made a few new ‘friends’ at such-and-such a bar (part of his long, involved secret plan to let Tony know he was available.)

They were bad jokes, and they were politically incorrect jokes.  And didn’t they – now that Peter thought about it – suggest something he hadn’t considered before?

“Maybe he needs a good ass-ramming from a twink,” Tony had joked about YET ANOTHER villain (Tony’s CONSTANT referral to defeating badguys as ass-rammings was getting old and tired and yet it continued through constant complaints.)  “I don’t think you know what a twink is, Tony,” Peter had countered at the time, but now the statement just made his eyes wider.

And there had been MANY jokes to that effect – more than Peter could count (he had learned to ignore them.)  

And then – ah god and then – the night of their first time (or was it the next?) that Tony had pushed him up against a counter and stroked his erection through his pants, panting in his ear, “And how many of those science nerds and techno geniuses have had the thrill of this parting their ass?  I want names and places and positions.”

“You’re all talk, Stark,” was Peter’s counter.  He was proud of it at time.  

And then…..”QUIT riding my ass, Fury, that’s PETER’S job!”  to a computer screen after it became common knowledge that they had hooked up.  “Deranged fantasy, probably due multiple head injuries” was Peter’s parry.  

(But that was them, wasn’t it?  It was ALL banter and snark, all counter and parry.  They had NEVER talked about what the other one wanted in bed, not once.  Not beyond “are you ready” before and “Are you ok?” after.)

And then, OH GOD, and then…

That night, it had been THAT NIGHT that Tony had joked about their sex life in front of Fury that Peter confronted him.  

“I’ve learned to ignore all the lewdness and the one-liners and single-entendres

Double-entendre

And stupidity – but that means I’m ignoring 75% of what comes out of your mouth Tony!  Do you know how lonely that makes me??”

He regretted the words as soon as he had said them – their Netflix-and-Chill night was supposed to begin the moment the conference call with Fury had ended – and Peter had no reason to believe that an argument before hand would nix the whole evening.

He didn’t know if they would have sex after they argued – they had never argued before.  Arguing involved communication, and communication was not something they did.

But Tony said nothing in reply, only stared at him intensely.  “What do you want from me, kid?” he said finally, and he sounded as if the wind had been punched out of him.

“I just want a little honesty for goddsakes, I just want a little…”

But Tony was pealing off his vest and throwing it at Peter.

“I didn’t mean,” Peter started, but his voice died in his throat when Tony actually <i>took off his shirt<i>,  which he NEVER did in a lit room, and threw THAT at Peter too.

Peter stood dumbfounded for a moment as Tony stood, barechested, in front of him, his chest heaving, his face confrontational.  For a split second Peter took it all in – THE SCARS HERE – when Tony started undoing his belt and Peter was following suit.

They had taken each other in for a moment before coming together in the middle, Tony grabbing Peter’s face hard.  He brought their forehead together and he said, oh god how had Peter forgotten it?

“I’m going to take you into that bedroom, and I am going to slick up that beautiful cock, and I am going to ask you to do obscene things to my body.”

Peter-in-the-dormroom groaned and sank his head down into his hands at just how ignorant Peter-In-Stark-Tower had been.  (But he had been so PROUD of himself!  He hadn’t countered, he hadn’t parried, he had simply forced Tony’s hands off his head, taken the man’s hand in his and, with what he hoped was his best pair of bedroom eyes, led the man boldly into the next room.

It was a good move. He was proud of that move. Dammit, why was it that everything he was proud of had been wrong?

“OhgodTonyI’msorry” Peter-in-the-dormroom was moaning into his hands now.  Tony had promised to do anything in bed Peter asked (in a rare moment of communication with words – “I’ll do anything you want, anything baby, just ask,” he had whispered and Peter HAD asked.  Without words.  Peter was BAD at words in bed – but fortunately everything he wanted could be described with his hands and his body) and instead of reciprocating Peter had just been clueless. When Tony had asked…

Peter’s head snapped up.

Tony never asked.    

“I am going to ask you to do obscene things to my body,” he had whispered…wait…had he said ‘asked’ or ‘demand?’  But it didn’t matter, because when they got to bed Tony hadn’t asked for anything.

It had been a beautiful night – Peter blushed to remember it – Tony had made him scream that night – but now Peter-in-the-dormroom could only remember the words that had been whispered before.

“Oh Tony, you didn’t ask, why didn’t you ask – wait a minute….”

 -the text exchange!!! HE STILL HAS IT!!!

Laptop and blanket and all were unceremoniously dumped as Peter dove for his backpack to scramble for his phone.  It was there, that text exchange (the truth is he saved ALL their exchanges.)  It was right there.  In black and white.  Less than a month ago.

 -Miss you

-When do I get to see you

-I’m going to break into your dorm room grease up Little-Peter and take your V-card

-I lost my V-card before I kissed you.  You’ve got nothing Stark

-There are different kinds of V-cards, kid.

-Someday I’m going to get EVERY ONE of yours.

 Peter put the phone down and stared, dumbfounded, at the clock.  He watched it count the hours down until dawn.  There would be no sleep tonight.  There might be no more sleep forever.

[nix-xin-art]

Mmmm Soundwave transformers prime… yummy yummy

[passionpluto]

Premiere Nebula Modern AU Headcanons

(AKA how I think these future girls would act in 2019.)

Omega:

—Cartoon fangirl. Since her theme color is rainbow and she’s an artist, her faves would probably be the crazy colorful ones like She-Ra, Steven Universe, and MLP.

—Sells her art on the convention and Maker Faire circuit.

—Likes listening to indie music.

—Isn’t big on superheroes, but Stelle bought her a Thor jacket once for a gift exchange/secret Santa (kind of as a joke about her lightning powers), and she still wears it around a lot.

—Likes investigating urban legends, but isn’t quite as daring as the YouTubers who regularly go into abandoned buildings. (She may not be as easily scared as she was before the altering, but she’s still got anxiety, so like me, she’d be much too freaked out about getting caught.)

Valka:

—Watches true crime documentaries and claims she’s doing it for intel about how villains think. (Which is true, but she also wants to see if her case ever comes up, if people ever suspect one of the country’s major leaders of being the Manufacturer.)

—Likes tabletop games, especially if they’re strategy-based.

—Wears silly workout shirts, mainly because she thinks an athletic sun elemental wearing a “sun’s out guns out” shirt is the funniest thing ever. The other Nebula members understand that anything that gets their leader out of her trauma for a little bit is good, but still find it hard to take her seriously if she’s wearing one during briefing.

—Uses the “sparks joy”/“does not spark joy” meme incessantly, because her last name is Sparks and she secretly has a terrible sense of humor. Will instinctively say “this does not spark joy” in a tired voice whenever she’s disappointed.

—Because her younger sister Io loves anime, and because she has black hair and blue fire, she has been roped into cosplaying Dabi several times, often while Io cosplays as Todoroki. She was annoyed at first about this but realizes that this is probably the one time people get excited about seeing her use her powers. (“She did the thing! She did the thing!”) Plus, she actually doesn’t mind playing a villain once in a while.

—Definitely watches “mind game” anime like The Promised Neverland and Death Note.

Io:

—Was an unbearable hipster in her early teens.

—Probably owns at least three Jurassic Park T-shirts.

—Shitposter of the group.

—Was the one who got Valka hooked on true crime shows.

—Is currently the one trying to peer pressure Omega into exploring abandoned buildings.

—Likes YouTube amusement park documentaries, even though she’s only been to a few in her life because of the Manufacturer’s terrible parenting.

Xue:

—Definitely likes fairy-kei and Lolita fashion, and often looks at street fashion blogs for inspiration.

—Has successful managed to choreograph her ice magic to match Elsa’s in Let It Go. Is currently working on the other Frozen scenes in hopes of someday mastering the entire movie.

—Probably dresses up as Elsa for little kids, because she’s that good of a person. The kids love seeing an Elsa who actually has ice powers!

—Goes on advice blogs a lot and tries to help as many people as she can on them.

—Once got a “my shield doesn’t fit in my workout bag” novelty exercise shirt from Valka, and only wears it to be nice. (Needless to say, the Nebula gift exchange was a bust.)

Xing:

—That one YouTuber who exclusively does metal covers of non-metal songs.

—Secretly has an Instagram poetry account, where she writes under a pen name to preserve her “street cred.” (“It’s one thing to write your own songs—online poetry is not rock ‘n roll.”)

—Absolutely had an emo phase.

—Attempts to make a Nebula meme account along with Io. (Valka nixes the idea.)

—Overly aggressive Guardians of the Galaxy fan. (“If you try to tell me the Avengers are better one more time, Stelle, I will fight you.”)

Koto:

—Gets roped into joining the robotics team, and actually really likes it.

—Once ordered an absolutely massive mint chocolate shake (like the kind you see on food blogs), and regrets it immediately.

—Regularly gets in Internet fights with people who hate mint chocolate.

—Will talk your ear off about the similarities between Stormtroopers and military clones, and how the implications behind the fictional one tie into the treatment of the other, very real party.

—Likes Captain Marvel (because she reminds her of her girlfriend Stelle) and has a couple Captain Marvel T-shirts.

—Since Io likes anime in the modern AU, she would immediately see the resemblance between Koto and a gender-flipped Deku (green hair, freckles) and remark on it in battle. Once she watches the anime, she finds it’s pretty cool that they look alike. (And that the dark skin/green hair combo also makes her resemble Sailor Pluto.)

Stelle:

—Had (and probably still has) a DDR phase

—Really likes Captain America, because Winter Soldier was on TV when she was in the hospital, and she admired how he never gave up on Bucky in spite of his brainwashing. For a while, she wished she had someone like that in her life, until the Nebula members basically say “Koto’s right there, you idiot.”

—Would probably be the one to spam their page with mental health and trauma memes.

—Likes YA fantasy a lot, even the silly ones.

—Projects a lot onto fictional characters. (Particularly Bucky because of the whole “brainwashed assassin” situation, Captain Marvel because of the “fighting for the wrong side” situation, and Rapunzel because of the “kidnapped since infancy” situation.)

Kaine:

—Probably reads trashy romance novels.

—Absolutely mains Widowmaker. (I don’t even play Overwatch, and I know this. Sniper-type IRL, kinda goth, definitely a Widow main.)

—Teaches Stelle to play Widowmaker after she realizes how close their backstories are, and bonds with her over video games.

—Follows Gothic Lolita blogs, just like how Xue follows classic/sweet Lolita blogs.

—Likes horror movies, but doesn’t scare easily.

Phea:

—Has a beauty/social justice blog that isn’t really popular.

—Most of her popularity comes from her makeup videos, where she attempts increasingly weird and complex stage makeup designs. She’s the one who does Valka’s cosplay makeup for the Dabi costume.

—Is a big advocate for body positivity, and calls out every scam-endorsing celebrity she sees on Twitter.

—Is the type to bullet-journal every day out and make it as aesthetic as possible.

—Has mermaid-print everything.

[girls-scenarios]

EXID as Supernatural/ Mythological Creatures

Prompt: Headcannons for DC and EXID as supernatural creatures?

A/N: Once I do the Dreamcatcher version, I’ll add a link here as well. Also, I tried not to just do the normal few creatures everyone always thinks of and make this a little more unique to each member. I ended up using a mythological creature (more like goddess) but it fit LE too perfectly to pass up. I hope that’s okay? Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy!

Solji

Nixe, a type of river spirit, or mermaid

She wouldn’t be the type to intentionally lure humans in

Although she would be curious about them

Enough so to draw them in so that she could get a better look

She would sing constantly until she realized that it was dangerous

Mostly because people kept almost drowning whenever she was around

Still, she sings, just quietly

Occasionally she still looks up to see someone trying to swim towards her though

She’s uncomfortable in her human form

Because she’s used to a tail, yes

And because the wet hem of her clothing is annoying

But mostly because she can’t sing

Singing is her life and she hates not being able to sing

Could be dangerous if you crossed her wrong

But is mostly just curious and laid back

Likes trying new things in human form

But also likes getting back into the water as soon as possible

She takes a liking to human music, though

And singing it

LE

Muse, goddess of the arts

More specifically, Euterpe, whose domain is music, song, and lyric poetry

Lives in a musical world

Literally hears music in everything she does

Quietly visits humans to bestow what she hears on them

Inspiring them to write the songs she wants to show the world

Has lived to see so many different types of music come and go

Of course, her favorite music was that of ancient Greece

She’s pretty much required to say that

But she likes modern music too

Especially Jazz and R&B

Who do you think inspired their creation?

She gets bored of music sounding the same and is always looking for new sounds to inspire musicians with

The reason why music changes from generation to generation

If you’d lived for as long as she did, you’d get bored too

Doesn’t necessarily love humans all the time

But sees them as necessary vessels for her song to flow through

She does mourn great musicians though

Often appears dressed in mourning garments at their funerals

She totally dances but wouldn’t be caught dead doing it

If music gets stuck in one place for a while, it’s because she’s resting

Living for this long is exhausting, okay?

Eventually she will return to inspire new music, always

She can’t stay away from the world of sound and music for long

Hani

Kitsune, Japanese shape-shifting fox

Smart and mischievous, typically thinking something up

Likes people and being around people

Which sometimes ends in misunderstandings

Especially since she can’t resist causing innocent mischief

Nobody knows exactly how old she is

Because she’s very intelligent

But it’s only book smarts

She’s still clumsy and seems to lack a bit of common sense

Gorgeous in human form, hides her tails VERY well

She knows people want to know how old she is

It’s amusing to her so she’ll never let it slip

Most of her tricks are harmless

Draws people in, in both forms

Don’t try to outsmart her: you can’t

Knows everything about you and everyone else

It’s unnerving to be around her sometimes

Because as innocent as she seems

Everyone knows she could do some real damage

And she likes it that way

Hyerin

Pixie, a type of fairy known for being mischievous and fun-loving

She would be friendly, but sometimes annoying or a pain

Never shuts up, always talking

You never know if what she’s saying is true or not though

Will help with housework and chores

But whoever she helps might wake up to obscene wallpapers or no toilet paper

Always pranking some poor soul

Sometimes they’re harmless, sometimes she goes overboard

Likes to dance and is generally happy and playful

Always has to be doing something

She gets bored super easily

What’s sleep she doesn’t do that

Gets annoyed when people aren’t doing their jobs or making the most of their days

If you’re nice to her, she’ll give you gifts

It depends on her mood whether they’re actually helpful or not

Once she decides she likes you, she’s attached to you

Seriously she won’t let go

Junghwa

Nymph, divine and free nature spirit

Always dancing. Always.

Without a care in the world

Likes making and wearing flower crowns

Shy around humans, tries to avoid them

Flowers grow when she laughs

Hates mornings

Can be found sleeping in gardens until noon

Mostly joyful and happy

Could be dangerous if people destroy nature in some way

Once you get to know her, she’s very loud and open

The humans she befriends are very, very lucky

Although she might end up dragging you into the river if she gets too excited

Still, you’ll get lots and lots of flower crowns

And a lot of skinship

Just wants to dance and laugh and have fun

[themyskira]

Amazons Attack! - part 1

Once upon a time, in the lead-up to the 2005-2006 cesspool of a crossover event that was “Infinite Crisis”, DC had plans for a miniseries called “Amazons Attack!”. The story was to be helmed by then-Wonder Woman writer Greg Rucka and artist Ethan Van Sciver, and it would deal with a conflict between the Amazons and the United States following Diana’s killing of Max Lord (and, presumably, building off the simmering background tensions between the two nations since the floating islands of Themyscira had crashed into the ocean off the coast of the US in early 2004).

The idea was nixed, but it never entirely went away. Over the next few years, it passed through the hands of numerous people at DC before finally landing in the lap of Will Pfeiffer in late 2006. By this stage, the original proposal was no longer feasible. The Max Lord story had been resolved, Themyscira had retreated entirely from the mortal plane, and there was no longer any interaction between the Amazon and American peoples.

But that wasn’t gonna stop DC from achieving their glorious vision of man-hating harpies attacking the US capital with swords and pointy sticks.

Around this same time, somebody else in the company had a genius idea. Jodi Picoult, a bestselling author with a strong following among women readers, had just released a new novel about family relationships and trauma, and one of the main characters happened to be a comic book artist. Why didn't they find out if Picoult was interested in writing an actual comic and, you know, lending DC some of that New York Times Bestseller cred?

Picoult wasn’t sure. She didn’t know if she had the time, let alone the interest, in the project. She’d never been much of a Wonder Woman fan. But her kids talked her into accepting, and so, with no previous comic writing experience and far too little editorial guidance, Jodi Picoult set out to make her mark on Wonder Woman.

Together, Picoult and Pfeiffer would craft one of the most widely-derided stories in Wonder Woman’s history. There would be crimes against the written word. There would be character assassination on a mass scale. There would be bees.

Part 1: Wonder Woman volume 3 #6 -- Jodi Picoult (writer) and Drew Johnson (artist)

Some context: For reasons too stupid to go into, Diana has decided to assume a secret identity. She hopes to can gain a better understanding of those she protects by living a normal human life… as an elite Department of Metahuman Affairs field operative charged with neutralising metahuman threats.

Agent Diana Prince is standing in a scungy restroom trying to remind herself that she’s not Wonder Woman. She’s doing that thing where the hero looks in the mirror and sees their alter ego reflected back at them, but due to some poor art decisions, it instead looks like she’s staring at a Wonder Woman poster that somebody has hung over a grotty sink.

More bad art choices occur in the next panel, where the mirror glowers at her behind her back.

Diana continues to puzzle over how having a secret identity is really hard since she doesn’t know the first thing about how to be a human being. Because it’s not as though a large part of Wonder Woman’s career as a public figure in Man’s World has been working as an ambassador and engaging with people across the world at all levels of society or anything.

Also, Jodi Picoult misspells “Themysciran” twice and both typos are left uncorrected, setting the standard for the number of editorial fucks given in this crossover.

Then she steps out of the restroom and into a superhero-themed amusement park, where we meet Diana Prince’s charmer of a partner, Tom Tresser.

“I can’t believe this is my job!” Tom exposition/whines. “I can’t believe we have to baby-sit some sore loser who won a reality TV show to become the new Maxi-Man! I can’t believe you are my partner! I can’t believe cotton candy costs four dollars now…!”

I can’t believe I’m reading this fucking crossover.

Diana diplomatically replies that she’s not used to working with a partner either, and Tom sneers that, based on what he’s read in her record, she’s “not used to working, period”. Because Batman was skilled enough to build an entirely new identity for Diana, but not smart enough to give her an employment history…? How the frig did she get hired by the DEO, then?

Also, great to see that Diana and Tom are both taking their assignment to prevent a human person from dying so seriously. While Maxi-Man is signing autographs out in the open, a sitting duck for any would-be attacker, Tom is gorging himself on fairy floss and Diana is trying to order a Wonder Woman-branded milkshake.

Diana: One Wonder Woman milkshake, please. Server: It’s been discontinued. It’s now called the Black Canary shake. Tom: Wonder Woman!! Now there’s a partner I wouldn’t mind having…

In case you hadn’t figured it out, Tom Tresser is the love interest. Whatta catch.

Also, no, Jodi. No. Either the Wonder Woman milkshake has been discontinued, or it’s been renamed the Black Canary milkshake. You can’t have it both ways.

This, by the way, is the first of several “hilarious” gags about how Wonder Woman is unpopular and regarded as kind of uncool. Picoult’s going for cheeky meta, but she comes off as ignorant, tone deaf and kind of mean-spirited.

In the real world, Wonder Woman doesn’t share the same level of popularity as Superman and Batman. But in the DC Universe, and particularly in the Wonder Woman comic, she’s consistently portrayed as a hero with a strong public presence and an ability to inspire, to the point where literally the issue preceding this one was a oneshot revolving around Wonder Woman’s influence as an empowering and inspiring hero.

If Picoult was playing, as Rucka did, with the idea that once Wonder Woman started using her public status to express her opinions, a large swathe of the public turned against her, that’d be one thing. But, no, she’s just decided, as a basis for her punchline, that Wonder Woman is a nonentity in the DCU, which is out of step with canon and does a huge disservice to the character.

As a meta joke, this also misses the point, because the fact that Wonder Woman doesn’t sell as many comics as Batman and Superman cannot be divorced from the the historical (and persistent) sexism in what remains a very blokey, male-dominated industry, not to mention the fact that DC put significantly more resources into producing and promoting Batman and Superman comics and merch. Those aren’t the only reason for the discrepancy in popularity, but they’re not things you can just brush off.

It gets even more unfortunate in the context of this particular comic’s publication. See, about ten months prior to this, DC had relaunched Wonder Woman with a new #1 issue penned by Allan Heinberg, who had recently earned much acclaim as the writer and co-creator of Young Avengers at Marvel. Between them, Heinberg and DC then proceeded to royally fuck up the relaunch. Heinberg wasn’t able to balance scripting duties with his TV writing job, causing issues to be delayed for months at a stretch, until it became clear there was no way he’d be able to finish his first arc before Jodi Picoult started her run and DC had to move on without him (he would eventually finish his story in the 2007 annual — over a year after he started the five-issue arc). Picoult’s first issue was only the third Wonder Woman comic to hit the stands in more than six months.

So basically, she’s making her funny-funny “boo, nobody buys Wonder Woman” against a backdrop of DC failing to produce Wonder Woman comics for months on end.

Anyway. Diana and Tom finally get around to doing their job and return to Maxi-Man’s signing table. Maxi-Man asks them to get him a chilli dog (“and a drink! I hear the Black Canary shakes are awesome!” GROANS FOREVER), and Tom has the nerve to be offended. “I don’t remember seeing this in my job description.” Well, gee, Tom, I don’t remember seeing ‘leaving your principal unprotected so you can slack off and stuff your gob with fairy floss’ in the job description either, and yet here we are.

Tom continues to grizzle about how unfair it is that his incredible talents are being wasted on this boring assignment, and this time Diana’s starting to get fed up. Meanwhile, the reality-show superhero they’ve been looking down their noses at is the only one who’s noticed that the rollercoaster behind them is spontaneously falling apart.

Of course, the moment Maxi-Man springs into action, he’s immediately knocked out cold by a piece of flying rubble, leaving Diana to take charge. Tom does what he does best, by which I mean he complains.

Diana: Tom! You get Maxi-Man to safety! I’ll get that crowd away from the roller coaster! Tom: But… I… we… Diana: There’s no time! Now! Tom: Who the heck’s she to order me around?!?

A quick costume change, and Wonder Woman saves the day, but not without internally griping about how stupidly confusing humans are.

Maybe this is what I was born for. To protect them… not understand them. But how can I…? They don’t even understand themselves.

urrrgghghhhhhh haaaaaate.

We never learn why the roller coaster spontaneously fell apart.

Later, as Diana and Tom make their way back to DOMA, Tom is still complaining. This time it’s about the fact that he missed Wonder Woman’s appearance at the theme park, because “I bet she looked hot”.

They stop at a store selling superhero merch so that Tom can get his niece a Wonder Woman action figure for her birthday. Diana comments that she thought Tom was an only child and Tom conspicuously doesn’t answer. And sure, it’s possible that the “niece” is a real human person who’s the daughter of a close friend or non-sibling relative, but given everything we’ve learned about Tom in the last eight pages, I think it’s far more plausible to assume that there is no niece and he’s planning on jerking off to a Wonder Woman action figure.

Diana continues to be terrible at having a secret identity.

“The Batman one’s better. Look — it’s got a detachable Batarang… But my — er, Wonder Woman’s lasso doesn’t even come off.”

All the Wonder Woman merch is 75% off because lol Wondy is uncool, and for some reason Diana is super offended and tries to lecture the poor store clerk about how obviously Wonder Woman is cool because saving the world is cool so there.

Clerk: Wonder Woman’s not cool, I guess. Diana: Doesn’t saving the world all the time make you cool? Clerk: All I know is she’s never sold as well as Superman or Batman… Tom: 75% off! Sweet!

Next, it’s time for a stop off at the gas station for some hilarious comedy hijinks around Diana’s total lack of familiarity with modern society!

Ha ha! Champagne comedy! All of this is just so new to her, don’t you know! It’s not like she’s ever lived among ordinary mortals

or held down a job

or, you know, interacted with any human being at length.

Now, I don’t blame Jodi Picoult for not knowing any of this. I’d be surprised if she’d even read a Wonder Woman comic before DC approached her, and though she would have done some background reading in preparation for this gig, she couldn’t be expected to be across every element of Wondy’s post-Crisis continuity, which at that point already stretched back two decades.

Her editors, however? Were not new to comics. They should have picked this shit up.

So, they go to get gas. Tom asks Diana to pay and she pulls out a ten dollar note. Tom points out this is insufficient in the most patronising way possible.

“Uh, gas is $3 a gallon, sweetheart. That might get us down the block…”

He asks he if she has a credit card, and she blinks in incomprehension. Yeah, because it’s not like Batman would have arranged cards and a credit history when he manufactured Diana’s false identity. Not like he’s known for being detail-oriented or anything. (And by the way, this is a thing that happened four fucking issues ago, so nobody has any excuses.)

Aaaaand Diana continues to suck at the secret identity thing.

Tom: Geez, how do you normally get around? Fly or something? Diana: Ha, ha. Funny. Fly places. Imagine…! Tom: Ten bucks? No credit card? Where are you from? Mars? New Hampshire?

Oh yeah, and this whole scene she’s been internally complaining about how humans are relentlessly acquisitive and materialistic and confusing and booooooo being an ordinary person is haaaaaaard.

Finally, they arrive back at HQ, where Sarge Steel chews them out for allowing a known fugitive like Wonder Woman to slip through their fingers at the amusement park, even though they weren’t at the park for Wonder Woman and this is literally the first they’re learning that Wonder Woman is a fugitive.

He also blames them for the rollercoaster getting destroyed, even though they had nothing to do with the damage and their only contribution was to get people to safety. Although, given how much they were slacking off on the job, it’s entirely possible that some metahuman terrorist snuck in and sabotaged the rollercoaster on their watch. Since Picoult still hasn’t told us how the rollercoaster was damaged, I’m just going to assume that this was the case.

It turns out that Wondy is wanted for questioning over her killing of Max Lord, even though she’s already been cleared of charges, so Tom and Diana’s new orders are to find her and haul her in. Awkwaaaaaard.

So obviously they get straight to work this important government assignment. I’m just kidding, they head straight for the DCU version of Starbucks. In fact, so far I haven’t come across any evidence that either of them do any work at all.

Things we’ve seen Tom and Diana do this issue:

Leave their principal unprotected so they can gorge themselves on junk food

Bicker and complain while a rollercoaster explodes behind them

Shop for superhero action figures

Fill up on petrol

Drink coffee

Things we have not seen Tom and Diana do this issue:

Their fucking job.

We get the usual obnoxious joke about Starbucks coffee sizes being weird and Diana being confused by them, which I’m pretty sure was hack material even in 2007.

Tom: Iced double Vente soy latte with Turbinado sugar, please. Diana: Um… Small cup of coffee? Server: Venti, Duovent, Grande, or Uber? Diana: Um… Small cup of coffee. [Everyone stares at her.] Diana: [whispers to Tom] I don’t think she speaks English…

They sit in the park, drinking their coffee, and Diana cries because humanity is confusing and everybody is mean to Wonder Woman.

No, really, that’s exactly what happens.

Diana: Why don’t you people just leave her alone? Who cares what she’s done? Tom: You talk about people like you’re not one of them, you know that? Diana: [CRIES]

Picoult’s Diana is so outrageously bad at maintaining a secret identity on even the most basic level, even a self-absorbed wanker like Tom Tresser ought to have cottoned onto her by now. Then again, he also failed to notice a rollercoaster collapsing a few metres away from him, so…

In an out-of-character display of ordinary decency, Tom gives Diana a pep talk, then heads off home. As he walks away, Diana hears a scream for help and jumps into action—

—aaaaaaand it’s an attractive young white college girl being mugged by a thuggish, armed black man. Definitely no ugly connotations lurking there.

Diana subdues him with a single punch, and is rewarded with proof that some people do still find Wonder Woman cool because, yes, we’re still on that tired gag.

College girl: I did a paper on you in my feminist theory class! I said you were an icon of womanhood we could all divine strength from… but I didn’t realise you were so… cool! Diana: I hope you got an A.

Tom, driving home, gets a call that Wonder Woman has been sighted in a seedy part of town. In addition to illegally talking on his phone — not hands-free — while driving, he does that thing people do when they’re pretending to talk on the phone, you know, helpfully repeating all the relevant information for the audience.

“Tresser. Wonder Woman? Seen at the Villains and Vixens Bar? I’m there, out.”

If we could hear both sides of the call, I can only imagine that it’d go something like—

Tom: Tresser.

Agent: Hey Tom, it’s Fred; hear you’re on the Wonder Woman case. I know it’s late, but we got a couple reports of sightings at the Villains and Vixens Bar. You happen to be anywhere near there?

Tom: Wonder Woman? Seen at the Villains and Vixens Bar?

Agent: Yeah, that’s what I just sa—

Tom: I’m there, out. [hangs up]

Agent: Jesus, I fucking hate that guy.

Basically what I’m saying is, he absolutely deserves it when he stumbles, ill-equipped, into a suspiciously flirtatious Wonder Woman who is wearing an earlier iteration of Diana’s costume and striking all kinds of ridiculous sexy poses, and instantly gets himself captured by what is obviously Circe in disguise.

Diana gets called back to headquarters, and she’s still wrestling with the question of how she can possibly do her job when her job is to arrest Wonder Woman. (WELL GEE, DIANA, I GUESS YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE YOU TOOK A JOB UNDER AN ASSUMED IDENTITY AT THE DEPARTMENT DEVOTED TO POLICING METAHUMANS LIKE YOU.)

Also turnstiles. She is deeply perplexed by turnstiles.

comedyyyyyyyyyy

Sarge tells Diana that Tom has been abducted and a pair of Amazon bracelets were found at the scene. This is all the evidence Sarge needs to conclude that Wonder Woman has gone back to her old neck-snapping ways and must be stopped. He gives Diana the bracelets in an evidence bag and tells her to take them to the lab and see what she can find out.

I have questions.

Why weren’t the bracelets already being analysed at the lab? Did Sarge Steel wrestle the evidence bag off a hapless crime scene investigator and smuggle them up to his office just so he could play show-and-tell with Diana? How do they know the bracelets are Wonder Woman’s? In this superhero-merch-flooded world, wouldn’t Amazon bracelets be a dime a dozen? Or is Wonder Woman so ~uncool~ that every Amazon bracelet manufacturer immediately went out of business and buried the shameful evidence of their failed ventures in a New Mexico landfill alongside all those Atari cartridges? And why would Wonder Woman leave her bracelets behind? They’re not the kind of thing she’s likely to forget. Yes, we know Circe’s planted the bracelets deliberately, but the DOMA agents don’t.

And most importantly, why does Sarge Steel’s reflection look like Diana?

Diana doesn’t need to take the bracelets to the bag, because she knows they’re replicas and, what’s more, she knows where they come from.

“They were designed to complete a uniform I donated to the Wonder Woman Museum… which closed down over a year ago.”

Okay, now hang on.

I realise we’re back on the hilarious ‘Wonder Woman isn’t popular’ gag, which absolutely has not outstayed its welcome, but a museum is not the same thing as a theme park concessions stand or a pop culture store.  A museum does not just go, ‘buhhhhh, I know we’ve amassed this huge collection of great historical, social and aesthetic significance. Indeed, it is almost certainly the largest collection of Wonder Woman and Amazon-related items in the world, and much of it was donated by Diana herself, making it immensely valuable. But — and this is awkward — it turns out people don’t want to visit us because Wonder Woman isn’t cool. Guess we have no other choice but to pack it in and open a Black Canary Museum down the road.” That is not how museums work, Jodi.

I’m also confused as to why Circe needed to steal a Wonder Woman costume from a museum when it would have been far easier to glamour her clothing to look like Diana’s, the same way she glamoured her features. This seems needlessly complicated.

Diana whips off her glasses and does the spinny-transformy thing from the TV show. This is technically a power that Wondy has at this point in continuity — at the end of Allan Heinberg’s first arc, it’s revealed that Circe has given Diana the supremely useless “gift” of being able to turn her powers off, allowing her to switch between Amazon and mortal with a spin and a flourish.

Except, when this issue was published… Heinberg’s last issue hadn’t been. Remember, he flaked on his scripting duties, so the final instalment of his story and the introduction of the dumbass spinny-power-up wouldn’t come out until November 2007 — six months after this issue was released.

The issue ends on Wondy flying to the rescue while Circe lies in wait in the defunct Wonder Woman Museum, predatorily clutching a chained and shirtless Tom Tresser.

[atelerixe]

Tagged by @dramaticmari Thank you

rules: tag 20 people to see their differences/similarities for 2018!

Questions:

- Favourite food: spaghetti with homemade sauce

- Foods i’d rather avoid: any seafood, eggplant because I'm allergic to it

- Favourite things to learn about: almost anything

- Favourite colour: green

- Best friends irl: I don't have one

- Favourite games to play: Dragon Age Inquisition multiplayer, ESO, most of the Atelier games, most of the "Tales of..." games, but right now mostly Zelda Breath of the Wild.

- When I have free time, i like to: Read, listen to music, play console games, watch anime, or watch movies.

- Favourite books: I feel like I've answered this question a lot. It's in a lot of these lists. The Old Kingdom series by Garth Nix, Eon and Eona by Alison Goodman. A lot of other books or series of books where people can talk to dragons or share some kind of telepathic bond with them. A lot of science fiction and fantasy really.

- Favourite movies: Ponyo. Star Wars IV, V, and VI before they were updated with CGI, although I definitely enjoyed the newest one. Big Hero 6! I watched that twice yesterday, although I was doing things at the same time.

- Favourite tv shows: Star Trek: TNG, Babylon 5. I know those are old but they're what I grew up with and they make me feel at home.

- Favourite holiday: Christmas and Chanukah. I don't celebrate it in a big way but I love all the lights and decorations.

- Things i do well: I can actually make pretty decent food from scratch although I rarely bother.

- Things i need to practice more: Playing piano. I pretty much have to relearn 13 years of work because I didn't do it for so long plus my left hand doesn't work like it once did and I basically have to relearn muscle memory on that side.

- Favourite song: I don't really have one. They change literally every few minutes. But for types of music I have some firm favourites. I love classical piano and orchestral music. Sound tracks with similar types of music. Plus most Disney soundtracks because they're so singable.

- Places i want to visit: Too many! Most of the UK, Israel to see my husband's family, Japan, Australia, and anywhere my mutuals are. Too bad we can't all go on some kind of group trip but the costs of that would be too much. I don't think any of us are rich haha.

-Favourite part of last year: I watched Yuuri on Ice thanks to someone I used to work with, which led to reading fanfiction, which led to fan art, and both of those led to Tumblr and to meeting my wonderful mutuals. My year has been crazy and you have all saved my sanity.

- Something sad that happened last year: This, is the first time I've shared this so publically, but a few of you know already. My dad passed away on December 4.

- When i get up in the morning i like to:  feed my pets and myself and take Lily out. Seriously. Technically those are chores but they're actually enjoyable ones. Plus after taking Lily out I can watch something while I eat my breakfast.

- Favourite drink: Tea. I'll spare you all the detailed list of tea :D

- Something new i’d like to learn this year: It's not exactly new but I want to continue to learn French even though I no longer live in a French speaking place.

I'm not going to tag 20 people because that's too much and I know some people aren't into these things. If you don't want to do it that's fine. If I don't tag you and you do want to do it that's great! Tag me if you do because I want to see it if any of the people following me do this! Also the people I want to tag were already tagged by the person that tagged me and it doesn't make sense for anyone to do this twice. Just tag me or tell me you already did it so that I can see it.

@n3rdlif343va @hauntedtelepone @magical-mistral @thefloralfox

[annualsurveyresults]

2017 Year End Survey Results

2017 Year End Survey!!!

Hi Friends…

Happy Valentine’s Day, we hope you’re all well and that love is in the air. 

This email is going out to the awesome ones who responded to the poll (51 out of approximately 150 recipients). It turns out it hit a lot of people’s spam folders, so next year we will do a better job of clarifying the subject, etc.

As the survey has grown, there are now too many answers for us to add comments and include links, so this year the answers are coming as filtered lists (we cut where necessary, to try to be useful and concise).

Thank you so much for your answers!

Section 1: What is Tickling Your Brain

Meaningful Books

Margin of Safety by Seth Klarman

Sapiens

Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win

American Eclipse

Cryptocurrency

Seven Mysteries of Life

Owned: Property, Privacy, and the New Digital Serfdom

Tiffany Haddish The Last Black Unicorn.

Colson Whitehead, The Underground Railroad

Fourth State of Matter (New Yorker piece)

The President’s Devotional

Born a Crime

Creativity, Inc.

A Little Life

Hillbilly Elegy

Book of Joy by Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu

Don Quixote

Oryx and Crake

All the Rivers

The Fifth Season

The Nix

Persepolis Rising

The Female Brain

The Undoing Project

Moonglow by Michael Chabon

The Girls on The Train

Underground Railroad

When Breath Becomes Air

Short and Tragic Life of Robert Peace

The Innovators

Caine Mutiny

Pachinko

Beyond the Sky and the Earth

Saints for All Occasions

We Were 8 Years in Power

The Odyssey: A Father a Son & an Epic

Achilles in Vietnam

Zero to One

The Taste of Empire

May We Be Forgiven

Homegoing

Being Mortal

Born to Run

The Smartest Kids in the World

Groovy Song or Band (well known artists/songs were filtered out, focusing on discovery)

James Booker

“Sound of Silence” - Disturbed

Electrocutioner – Soraia

Flamingo

I’m The One

Sharkmuffin

Chicano Batman

Lord Echo

Jason Isbell

Hank 3

Waist Deep in the Big Muddy

Zodiac by Dave Douglas and friends

Static and Ben El Tavori

Ben Franklin’s Song (the Decembrists)

Kevin Morby

CHVRCHES

Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings

Secret Weapons

Squirrel Nut Zippers, Metropolitan Klezmer

Dr. Dog’s Abandoned Mansion

Old Crow Medicine Show

De La Soul

Despair

The XX

Favorite Apps or Websites (well known apps/sites were filtered out, focusing on discovery)

Autodesk Graphic, Robinhood

Kaggle

ParkNYC

Hades Star - game

Weather.gov - everyday weather

Strictly Dumpling Mike Chen Food Reviews on Youtube

overcast

TheRawStory.com

ThinkorSwim, Kerbal Space Program

Nextdoor

Design Home game, Monument Valley, Redbubble

childmind.org

Ars Technica

Duolingo, NPROne, Feedly.com

Remodelista

Verify (OCR receipts - expense tracking); Day One (journal)

Strava, belfastcommunityradio.org, All Trails app

Wirecutter

The RealReal, Pickett of London

Citymapper

cupofjo.com

.alltop.com/photography

goodguide.com

blinkist, farnamstreetblog, bothsidesofthetable

Podcasts (well known podcasts retained, focusing on reinforcing quality)

Chapo Trap House, Intercepted, Archaeological Fantasies

Fresh Air, RadioLab, Terrible -Thanks for Asking

The Daily, On Being, Radiolab

Planet Money, Pod Save America, Radiolab

Real Vision, The Moth

99% Invisible

S-Town

Kalaidocast

The Daily, Pod Save America, Lovitt or Leave It

Imaginary Worlds, Jay + Miles X-Plain the X-Men, Blank Check with Griffin and David

Slow Burn; Pod Save America; RadioLab More Perfect

Slate’s The Gist; MSNBC Rachel Maddow; Week in the Knees

Wow in the World, Deadpod, Dope Queens

The Daily, S*Town, How I Built This

Splendid Table, Pod Save America

Busy Phillips podcast

Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me; It’s Been a Minute; This American Life

NPR 1 (for Terry Gross), Global Politico, Preet Bharara’s new podcast

HBR Idea Cast, a16z, Tim Ferris Show

Adventures in Finance, Bloomberg Surveillance, The Moth Radio Hour

In Our Time, This American Life, Fresh Air

S-town, Revisionist History, Rachel Maddow

Section 2:  Soul - Feeling Better

What Makes You Happy (answers filtered based on broad applicability and usefulness)

Silence

drawing

Puzzle Mania 😀

Beer and wine

The possibility of reducing work to three days a week

family time / family vacation

Salty food and walking the local golf course with my dog off leash

Tennis

My SodaStream

My dogs

Exercise

Los Angeles

Sleep

Freedom

Skiing

Jogging

Civic Engagement

Reconnecting

Reading

Learning about self-compassion

Robert Mueller

yoga and Bulgarian yogurt

Stress Relief (answers filtered based on broad applicability and usefulness)

Drawing cartoons on my iPad.

Crossfit & Krav

Table Tennis

Quiet Places

luna & larry’s coconut bliss dark chocolate ice cream

Running

Hot shower on the weekends

Building Stuff

Citibike

Tennis

Swimming/hot tub

Mindless computer games like solitaire

Long Walks

Making Art

yoga and Tango Dancing

Reading and Writing Poetry

Transcendental Meditation

Kickboxing

Skiing

Needlepoint

Stop Taking Things So Seriously.

Being organized to that I actually get the piles of papers/bills/etc off my “To Do List”

SLT (strengthen lengthen tone) UWS

Mindfulness practices & class (meditation, writing prompts)

Biking

Cooking

vodka or tequila mixed with club soda with a squeeze of lime

Meaningful Not-For-Profit Organization (no filtering, if you named it, it’s in here…)

Sleeping Giants

Los Angeles County Bicycle Coalition

misophonia research causes

Yvote

Israeli Venture Network

Humane Society of NY

International Refugee Assistance Project

Courageous Parents Network, helping families parent children with serious illness

The Bronx Freedom Fund

Goddard Riverside

IBD Support Foundation

Village Health Works

I just discovered the store BoxLunch, Badass Brooklyn Dog rescue is cool, also Tennessee Elephant Sanctuary is an amazing Group.

Hadassah hospital.

Jewish Funders Network

Child Mind Institute

CASA - court appointed special advocates for foster care children

EFF

The Trevor Project

Run For Something

Apex for Youth

Hazon

Indivisible, Hadassah

Child Mind Institute, Planned Parenthood

Mercy Corps

Harlem Children’s Zone

Indivisible

Second Harvest

City Step

Center for Justice and Democracy

Karuna Foundation

Speak Up Africa - helping mothers and newborns stay healthy

God’s Love We Deliver

Amani Global Works

Biblioburro

Gabby Giffords antigun PAC (giffords PAC) is fighting the right fight

AGW & WEACT (We Act for Environmental Justice)

ADL

Coney Island Prep

Polaris Project

American Cancer Society

Charity Water

Climate Reality Project

Inspiring Politician (no filtering, if you wrote it, it’s in here…)

No One/LOL (8)

Elizabeth Warren (5)

Donald Trump (“he inspired me to be active”) (3)

Tarana Burke (2) (#MeToo)

Kirsten Gillibrand (2)

Danica Roem (2)

Bernie Sanders (2)

Sally Yates (2)

John McCain

Jimmy Kimmel

Angela Merkel - her face says what I feel about American politics.

Adam Schiff

Samantha Bee

John McCain

Scott Stringer

Jeff Flake

Chris Murphy

Joe Kahn

Cory Booker

Michelle Obama

Jon Ossoff

Hillary Clinton

Bob Ferguson - Washington State Attorney General

Best Restaurant Experience This Year (no filtering, if you wrote it, it’s in here…)

PABU Izakaya in SF

Blanca

Berns Steakhouse in Tampa, FL

Breakfast Burrito from Frank’s on Fairfax

Sushi Nakazawa

Los Angeles Tatsu Ramen, Pork Bao on Melrose.

Asiate

Boulud Sud

Tomahawk steak at Gelso & Grand has changed me as a person

Park Avenue Summer

Pokeworks at lunch

Azurmendi ½ hour outside Bilbao Spain

The Modern (2)

Atlantic Grill

Candle Cafe

Barbuzzo (Philadelphia)

ABC Kitchen

Here’s Looking at You (LA)

Excellent Dumpling House in Chelsea

Burma Superstar

Blue Ribbon Brasserie, SoHo

Eataly

Quality Italian

Sate Kampar, Philadelphia

Shalom Y'all

Nix

Azurmende (in Bilbao)

Breakfast at Hyatt Kathmandu

Vietnam on First Avenue NYC

Maison Pickle

Jeni’s Ice Cream (ATL)

Sushi Takeshima in Kanazawa, Japan

Mastros

Picco Larkspur, CA

The Old Rose in the Jane Hotel

Souley Vegan - Oakland

Four Seasons Jackson Hole

Chris Aerni’s is the chef/owner of the Rosemont Inn in New Brunswick, Canada

Bite Into Maine - Lobster Roll

Sushi Inoue

Best Purchase Under $500 (answers filtered based on broad applicability and usefulness)

Allbirds runners

Samsung 4K HDR Monitor

Adidas Ultra Boost running shoes

Netgear orbi

Airpods (4)

5 nights of babysitting

SodaStream

InstantPot!

Deluxe Ninja blender

Salomon hiking boots

Brookes walking shoes

Western Mountaineering Sleeping Bag

Amope Electronic Foot File

Contigo hot cup for on-the-go. Really does keep my tea warm for 4hrs!

Madewell Jeans

Wrinkle-free shirts from LL Bean

Amazon Echo

Bombas socks (honeycomb support structure rocks)

We designed a glass vase and had it blown for us by Lexington Glassworks in Asheville, NC

Smart Light Bulbs

F2C Indoor Exercise Bike Stand trainer W/ 8 Levels of Resistance

Dream “Off The Beaten Path” Vacation (filtered to focus on discovery)

Northern India

Hill Tribes of India

The Color wars in India

Jacmel, Haiti

Rocky Mountain National Park

Lake Louise

Azores (3)

Portugal (4)

Mississippi

Namibia, Africa

Morocco

Aran Islands, Ireland

Northern Scandinavia

Lamu, Kenya

Palau

Iceland - Fire and Ice experiences

Cuba

Health Products or Insights (not filtered - you were all very interesting on this one)

Sleep more

ClassPass - yoga once a week

Pull-up bar that pops in above door

Stretches learned during physical therapy, amazing. Better posture while standing. Using a standing desk that can move up and down.

Switched from Eucerin face cream to Rose Hip and Hibiscus Moisturizer, skin feels much better.

One big meal a day

Citibike

under desk bike, apple watch

Yoga

I have begun Pilates this year and it really seems to work with my body. I am hoping I can join a studio to work with the machines next year. Also the foam roller will change your life ! I roll my back daily and it helps soooo much!

Not eating 5 or more hours before going to bed

Started tai-chi

Drink water

Cycling

doing at least a little bit of yoga or stretching every single day

intermittent fasting

alkali water

Flotation

TM

Mindfulness in every-day moments

You can do a lot in one day rather than spread it out over 5-6 days

More mindful breathing.

Hiking with walking sticks really helps the knees.

Still searching for something that I will stick with

SLT and retinol nightly

Yoga. And stretching.

I had some imaging done on my heart. Does that count?

Feldenkrais

hot yoga (I know, it’s so 10 years ago)

Stretching!

Marula facial oil and MCT oil in coffee aka bulletproof coffee

Float tanks

Eating low carb

Insight: Dry Fasting as implemented by Dr. Sergei Filonov in Siberia – cured my friend’s debilitating Lyme disease with six weeks of treatment.

Magnesium Taurate (back pain)

Milk thistle

How often do you meditate?

3+ times per week:             6.1%

1 or 2 times per week:     18.4%

1 or 2 times per month:   12.2%

rarely:                               22.4%

never:                              40.8%

Prediction: Bitcoin price at the end of 2018

>$25,000                                        22.0%

Between $25,000 and $2,500       63.4%

<$2,500                                         14.6%

Prediction: Senate after 2018 Elections

Republicans gain seats (>51 seats):        6.4%

51 Rep / 49 Dem (stays the same):         4.3%

50 / 50:                                                  23.4%

Democrats gain control:                       66.0%

Prediction: Who will win the World Cup

“I don’t care”:           53.1%

Germany:                 14.3%

Brazil:                       10.2%

Spain:                        6.1%

Argentina:                  6.1%

All other choices too low to bother with…

Favorite Life Hack (light filtering for usefulness)

Always be kind to your wife

Make a daily list of three things each day for which you are grateful.

Rely on the experts. They’re generally right

Better to “get over it” quickly

Using binder clips to hold loose wires to back of desk

Gowanus is as cool of a neighborhood as it is ugly.

Seek out comedy and laugh as much as possible. Recent interests Tiffany Haddish and Judd Apatow has a few good laughs on his special.

You don’t control your circumstances, you can control how you deal with them

Ink + Volt Planner

shave only once a week

Practice patience…

This is probably common knowledge to everyone, but it turns out there’s an arrow near the gas display that tells you which side of the car has the gas tank.

I learned about living an aloha life and while it is not super easy in NYC it is always a conscious decision that has not failed to make me feel better

“Books make my bed dirty, and alas, I ain’t got no transcendental eyeglasses”

Technology is not my friend

I should’ve spent more time with the Gottliebs in 2017. Will not make that mistake again.

Less social media. Facebook / twitter / insta can be bad for you.

overnight steel cut oats

Voters need to show up

Gmail allows variations to your address that include inserting a “.” anywhere or adding +“whatever you want” before the “@”. Generally logins require both you’re email address and your password. Half of that equation (your email address) is publicly available. For painless added security, when creating logins to sites, consider adding “+whatever you want” to the email address. A hacker would require both your password and this variation on your email address, which no one but you would have knowledge of. Incoming messages can also be filtered into folders by variations of this kind if you like (so “+secure”; “+junk”; “+temp”; “+important”).

Stop watching the news.

TM

It’s not as bad as it appears

To help kids be independent, we need to trust them.

Most damage can be repaired.

Be kind as often as you can because it will come back to you in spades

Book called subtle art of not giving a bleep….very good life advice

Take chances and try to be happy. Life is too short not to do so.

We need to regain a more equal distribution of income and the belief that we should take care of each other.

bidet

Getting old sucks

Growing old is good and becoming invisible has distinct advantages.

It’s not a new one, but work/life balance is CRUCIAL

Life is short.

When I say “yes” to something, what I am saying “no” to?

Electric power consumption will increase steadily over time notwithstanding efficiency gains in products that consume electricity