#next time i'll try to write something happier

[hispg]

Longing for love

Pairings: R2! Leon X Fem! Reader

Summary: It's your birthday, and your childhood friend wants to make it special.

Wc: 2.4k

Warnings: smut, unprotected sex, p in v, loss of virginity (both sides), pet names, soft sex, making out, slight oral( f receiving).

An: I know I promised I'd post this last week, but this week I was feeling down about writing anything. Just as I haven't replied to asks or comments, I'll probably reply to them tonight.

I don't know what happened, I had so much to write and ended up writing almost nothing. Anyway, I'll try to finish what I've already got half-written and try to post it over the next few days!

I really hope this bad mood passes soon, and I thank you all for your love. 🫶🏻

It was a special day, your birthday. You had nothing special planned, nothing other than lying in the comfort of your bed watching some series on your laptop.

Even though you had told your childhood friend, Leon, that you didn't want anything special today, he refused to accept it.

It was your birthday, how could he pass it up? Even though he didn't have the best financial conditions in the world, he spared no expense in giving you a shiny necklace with a heart as a pendant.

If it were up to him, he would give you anything you asked for. Because he thought you deserved all the best the world could offer.

And here he was, spoiling you with sweet, wet kisses, holding you down on the bed while he gave your forehead one last kiss before whispering:

"Are you sure you don't want anything?" You'd lost count of how many times he'd asked you that during the night.

You knew he could get you anything you wanted, all you had to do was ask.

"No, Lee..." You said softly, clutching and snuggling into him.

He nodded, tangling his fingers in your hair and playing with the strands, holding you so close to him that the two of you had your bodies pressed together.

The bed seemed so cozy for both of you, the covers that were wrapped around your bodies as the two of you exchanged these light caresses.

You couldn't have been happier on your birthday, cuddling up to him while the gentle rain fell outside.

Leon felt his heart flutter every time he saw you all dolled up in a light purple dress, looking like a princess. Wearing your prettiest earrings, glossy lips that had left a raspberry taste in his mouth that made him keep licking his lips because of it.

"You know... I saw a dress..." Leon begins, and you already know where this is going to end.

He always says he sees something that reminds him of you, and every time he ends up bringing it as a present for you, with the excuse that you'd look perfect wearing what he's bought.

"Leon, you don't have to..." You whisper, kissing him on the lips.

He closed his eyes with a soft smile, pressing you a little closer against him.

"But I'd love to..." He says with that cocky smile you already know well.

You giggle, kissing his cheeks several times. He always got frustrated and embarrassed when you did this, his cheeks getting hot from the act.

But he'd be lying if he said he didn't love it every time you showered him with kisses. The feel of your lips on his skin was something he would never forget.

Without even realizing it, he gripped your hips a little harder, getting goosebumps when your breasts grazed his chest from how close you were to him.

Once you'd finished what you'd started, the proud smile plastered across your face.

"Why are you blushing?" You asked with mischief and sweetness in your voice, biting your lip as you looked at him.

You watched his lips come together and press, a sketch of a pout there. His eyes locked with yours, his arms wrapped around your waist.

God, how could he resist that? How could he resist you?

He swears he was trying to ignore the situation, trying to ignore the way you were so close to him, your warm body crashing against his.

Maybe he was being daring, but he took the opportunity a step further, placing a light kiss on your neck. Letting his lips linger there for a few moments.

The response that came from you pleased him, he heard your breathing hitch, your chest descend and rise more visibly. He knew you liked it.

"Maybe I want something..." You whispered, looking at him with a certain shyness.

You knew that the two of you had already crossed the line into friendship, not least because you doubted that friends kissed or got that close. But when he looked at you in such a sweet way, something in you melted.

"Say... I can give you anything you want..." He whispers, lightly caressing your cheeks.

You bite your lip, leaning your forehead against his once more, and soon the sweet words are coming from your lips:

"A kiss?" It wasn't the first time you'd kissed, but the way you asked for it this time, so sweetly, the smile was kind of drawn on your face.

Who was Leon to say no?

"Whatever you want, princess." That's all he said before kissing you.

It started in a loving and gentle way, his lips moving against yours in sync, his fingers caressing your waist with affection and delicacy.

Your hands wrapped in his hair as his tongue traced your lower lip, asking for passage into your mouth. And you didn't deny it.

You don't know how it happened, or how a simple make out session turned into languid, sloppy kisses, his hands grabbing every bit of skin he could find, not wasting a single precious second to touch you.

And before you knew it, he was on top of you, his hands slowly coming down to hold your hips. And knowing how far this was going to go, you didn't try to do anything to stop it.

In the blink of an eye he had already taken off your dress, his lips trailing down your neck as he grasped the waistband of your panties, taking no time to remove them at once.

His eyes went wide once you were naked in front of him, his cock aching from the rush of seeing you like this.

"Can I...?" All he wanted was your permission to continue or to stop, it was up to you.

You nodded shyly, letting him do whatever he wanted.

And that was all he needed to continue. He moved his face down to your belly, kissing softly and sweetly across your skin, leaving no part untouched. He was so anxious that he could barely think straight, the only thing he wanted to feel was what it would be like to be inside you.

So he needed to prepare you, right? And once he saw how wet you were already getting with just a few kisses, it wasn't long before he thought of a solution to get you soaking wet.

His hands gripped your thighs, you could tell he was as nervous as you were. The blush on his cheeks, the way he was biting his lower lip to hold back the sounds he might make at the sight of you in this situation.

He'd never seen you naked like this, but he'd be lying if he said he hadn't imagined this situation multiple times.

But now that you were here in front of him, it was a completely different story.

Before you could look at him, you felt his warm lips on your thighs, giving you light, wet kisses.

As if he was afraid and apprehensive of making any moves, he had never done that in his life, he was just following what he thought was right, maybe he could call it instinct or something.

His warm, soft lips gave you goose bumps, made your body shudder under his body, you gasped and arched your body gently.

His every touch was capable of making your thoughts go blank and you forget the world around you, as if nothing else mattered. Just the two of you there.

He also couldn't stop salivating once he saw your wet folds, the state he'd managed to leave you in with just a few kisses and caresses. Your throbbing pussy almost begging for him, a sight that sent an electrifying pulse to his hard cock.

You held back from moaning when you felt his hot breath against your sex.

It wasn't long before you were shuddering at his touch, the way he was so delicate as he planted kisses in your folds, he was so tender that it was simply attractive to watch. His blue eyes staring at you, just to make sure you were comfortable with it all, and that you wanted it as much as he did.

As soon as he saw that you were ready for him, he began to undress. In a hurried and clumsy way he took off his clothes, throwing them into a corner of the room.

You were mesmerized by his body, strong and muscular, so defined that you could salivate just looking at it.

Once again he was lying on top of you, his lips pressed to yours in a hot kiss.

You only heard him fisting himself a little, before he began to guide his tip into your entrance. You knew from the kiss he was giving you that he wanted to make you focus only on him, making you as comfortable as possible.

So he slowly entered you, calmly and patiently, all the while asking you if it was okay and if he could continue. The situation was new and strange for both of you, so reluctance was more than normal.

Once he had sunk into you, he could have sworn to God that he was holding back from cumming, the sensation of your warm, wet walls was more than enough to finish him off.

But he held on, held on and tried his best to stop the thoughts of simply exploding inside you here and now.

And he hovered over you, simply rigid on top of you, just as his hard cock didn't move an inch from where it was.

He felt your discomfort, the way you hissed a little when he put it in, and if you were being honest, it stung considerably.

He stood still, that is until you both got used to the foreign feeling.

But even then, he kept giving you soft kisses on the cheek, whispering sweet nothings to help you relax.

"I love you so much..." He whispered sweetly in your ear, giving the area light kisses and licks.

You moaned softly at his touch, instinctively wrapping your legs around his hips, entwining with him in such an erotic and intimate way.

And in yet another of his gestures, he entwined his fingers with yours, squeezing your hand tightly as he gazed at you with those gentle blue eyes.

It was a gaze so tender, so loving, a gaze that was reserved for you, only you.

"You can move..." You say softly, looking at him shyly.

He gets the message, and slowly starts to move, in a shallow and calm way, he had no intention of rushing things.

Not least because he could see how nervous you were, or how much your pussy clenched around him, even though he had stimulated you, had prepared you to loosen up more.

"So tight..." He moans softly, giving your lips a gentle kiss.

The way he was so tender, so tenuous as he thrust into you, he didn't even move much, just enough to cause a little friction.

Not least because he didn't even know what you liked at those times, it was two inexperienced lovers learning at once.

"Lee..." You call softly, gently biting your lower lip as you look at him.

Surely he noticed the way your hips began to move against his, as if your body knew exactly what to do in this situation.

He took this as a green light, and began to pick up the pace, still making a point of giving you kisses and caresses all over your body.

You felt your mind getting so heavy, his cock reaching places so deep, points so sensitive that you couldn't even imagine.

It was all so good, certainly better than you imagined.

In one swift movement he removed one of his hands from yours, moving down your belly until he reached your crotch, where he stopped respectfully. Not wanting to do anything without your permission.

"Is it okay if I....?" He asked, placing his index finger next to your clit.

He wanted to know what you liked, what felt good, and he was going to start here. With your bundle of nerves.

"Y-yes... Please." You asked in a sly voice, and he could even see the pout that formed on your lips.

He smiled against your neck, giving the area a hickey, leaving a small mark. And then there was his thumb, smoothing over your clit, making small, delicate circles on the sensitive flesh, making you roll your eyes and moan louder with each movement.

He eased off when he felt you loosening up more, and with that he understood that he could increase the speed of his hips, and so he did.

Now the dirty, wet sounds echoed through the room, his heavy balls slapping against you and making that characteristic skin-on-skin noise.

But neither of you cared, so lost in that moment that the least of your problems was the profanity that came out of your mouths in the form of words.

Your heavy breaths came together as one, in the purest of synchronies. He was close, and so were you.

But as far as he was involved, your pleasure came first, so he would hold back as long as he could so that you would come first.

"Leon... I think I'm going to cum." You say in a low moan, feeling a new sensation forming in the pit of your stomach.

Your walls squeezing so tightly around him, and him trying his best to hold back. With a strangled groan you felt your hot fluid pouring out of you, your body arching and crashing against his as you came.

It was enough to send him over the edge too, and he almost didn't take his cock out of you, he was so lost in your expression of ecstasy that he forgot he wasn't wearing a condom.

He even thought about cumming in your belly, but was genuinely apprehensive of making a mistake and making a mess. So he pulled out of you, fisting himself and cumming on the sheets. Moaning and grunting as his cum spurted onto the silk sheets.

You were both tired from the recent orgasm, and he took the opportunity to lie on top of you and hold you close.

"On your belly next time?" He asks softly, a shy, mischievous smile appearing on his lips.

You smile, trying to hide the blush on your cheeks with your hands, hugging him as he relaxes on top of you.

"Yes, next time." You whisper, closing your eyes and storing the moment in your memory.

You couldn't have hoped for anyone better to lose your virginity to, and for sure, Leon couldn't have had anyone better either.

You can believe it was your best birthday.

[bat-boys]

forever, my love

pairing: Azriel x fem reader

word count: 4.3k

warnings: 18+, mentions of battle and war, references to depression, smut (fingering) but it's romantic, angst but also fluff.

summary: you and Azriel had seen many battles over the centuries but when something goes wrong and has a lasting impact on you, Az promises to take care of you.

a/n: thank you so much for the love on the first fic! here's another one! I promise next time I'll write something happier haha, suggestions are welcome! I hope you enjoy.

The cruel, unyielding symphony of battle swelled in you as you continued to swing your sword at the enemies in front of you. Grunts of pain and screams of frustration left your lips as you continued to carve a path through the soldiers in your way, desperately trying to hold the line as Cassian had commanded. 

Your body moved automatically, thanks to the centuries of muscle memory drilled into you from the intense training and the many battlefields you had found yourself on during your long life. In recent decades, you may have taken a step back from helping to command the Night Court armies and turned your attention to training the next legion of warriors and aiding your spymaster in more covert missions. Still, your body would always remember the steps needed in battle. It would never shrink from charging head first.

Once, you had been told you were beautiful to watch in battle—second only to Cassian himself as you danced your way through enemy hordes. But now, as you cut through another bottleneck of soldiers, you could only focus on keeping yourself alive, so you were extremely exhausted. 

Step, swing, push, slash, pivot, hit. 

As you managed to gut the last soldier in front of you, you allowed yourself a small moment of reprieve to collect your thoughts and take a gulp of air. The sound of battle raged around you, and you could faintly see your friends and allies around you, diligently fighting for a future you had only just battled for a mere handful of years ago. You sent a pulse down that precious thread, tucked deep within your heart and nodded your head in relief when you felt a responding pulse from the male on the other end. Alive. He was still alive. That's all that mattered at the moment. 

You heard a shout close beside you and watched an Illyrian soldier, who had been grounded due to semi-shredded wings, fight off a group of soldiers starting to swarm around him. Taking a deep breath, you sheathed your long blade and palmed the knives strapped to either thigh.

Winnow, slash. Winnow, stab. Winnow, swing. Your High Lady herself had taught you this particular move after you had seen her yourself face enemies from a different war, a different conflict. You kept the image of your friends smiling at Feyre as she had embarrassingly walked you through how she did it, blushing furiously at your instance in teaching you at the forefront of your mind, and you continued to dance to the sound of the battle's symphony. 

That was the future you continued to fight for, and you were determined to protect it. 

…

Your entire body heaved as you shoved your blade through the chest of the last soldier in front of you. The sounds of battle were quietening and dying out as the last of the enemy horde were tied up or killed. 

A groan left your lips as you yanked your blade free and used the last of your power and strength to winnow to the edge of the battlefield. You stumbled as you landed, cursing yourself for letting your power drain so thoroughly during battle. Az would chastise you about that later. Speaking of which…

Where are you? You sent down the bond, waiting for the familiar calm voice to reach your mind. A frown fell on your face as the minutes stretched past, and you didn't hear a response from him. 

Az? 

You refused to panic just yet. While this was unusual, you knew the moments after a battle was the most crucial for a spymaster as he gathered up defeated enemies to spirit them away for interrogation. He was probably just busy, you reasoned with yourself.

But a small part of your brain also whispered that he always kept the precious channel between you both open and always responded when you called. 

You trudged through the mud towards the huge fortress in front of you. It may have been dilapidated and crumbling, but it provided a place where Rhys could gather his allies and forces and not be constantly caked in dirt and mud from his war camp. Once, it had probably been beautiful, home to some illustrious High Fae family, but now it was home to tired soldiers and had clearly seen much better days. 

Azriel. You tried again to reach your mate through the bond, your heart thundering louder in your chest when you didn't receive a response. This time, you stretched your consciousness along that bridge…and slammed into a cold stone wall on the other end. Panic began to claw up your throat, but you refused to give in. He was probably busy with Rhys or Cassian; you desperately tried to reason with yourself as you sheathed your heavy blade into the scabbard strapped to your back and walked up the stone steps to the bustling entrance of the fortress. 

"Injured that way, please!" You heard the familiar voice of your High Lady directing her people from inside the entrance. She turned around, and you saw her face relax in relief as she spotted you, "Y/N. Oh, thank the cauldron, you're alright." 

Feyre was wearing her Illyrian leathers, her hair windswept and looking just as tired as you felt. She walked towards you, and you hugged her tightly, grateful to see one of your dearest friends safe and sound. You gently manoeuvred around the bow strapped to her back as she hugged you back just as fiercely. Much to everyone's surprise and yours and Rhys' amusement after the war with Hybern Feyre had mastered the notoriously tough Illyrian bow - why anyone doubted her after her past in the human realm you were still confused by. You had seen her sweeping over the battlefield today and dispatching enemies, saving your life more times than you cared to admit. Her flying wasn't strong enough to join in with the Illyrian legions yet, but she had become invaluable on the battlefield once again.

"You looked awesome up there today." You both grinned at each other, warriors recognising each other, "where is everyone?"

"Amren and Mor are in the war chamber, exhausted but ok. Cassian was dropping off a soldier to the hospital wing."

"Az?"

"I thought he was with you?" A quick shake of your head had her face falling, "Ok, he's probably busy with clean up - let me see if Rhys can reach him."

"Thank you," you whispered, and she squeezed your shoulder and kissed your cheek before going back to directing people coming through the entrance. 

You jumped as you felt a bigger, wider hand fall on your shoulder but relaxed when you turned to see Cassian grinning down at you. Not the Illyrian warrior you were desperate to see but still a fucking welcome sight. 

"You saved our asses out there, as usual, tiny angry one." You rolled your eyes at the nickname he had given you hundreds of years ago as you let him pull you into a bone-crushing hug. 

"Glad to see you survived another battle, General, and without getting yourself torn to shreds."

"Yeah, yeah, shut up you." He teased as he gently pushed your shoulder. You may be Az's right-hand woman with his spy network now, but you were Cassian's second in command first. A formidable warrior whose name struck fear into your enemy's hearts, renowned for being utterly ruthless in combat and undefeated. How long ago it now felt when you and Cassian had first led the armies in that war hundreds of years ago.

"Have you seen Az?" You hated how quiet your voice sounded, but you struggled to keep the panic at bay. 

"No," Cass frowned, "is he still out there?"

"I don't know, I can't reach him." You whispered, and immediately you felt Cassian shift, ready to head back out there and find his brother - could see the panic that settled in his eyes at the thought of finding him dead on the battlefield.

"Let's not panic yet. We'll go find Rhys, and we can set up a patrol-"he continued to talk to you, laying out a plan before you, but you couldn't hear him. Couldn't hear over the sound of your own panic as you tried to not give in to the fear that was eating away at your heart. You absolutely refused to even think for a minute that he was dead. But why was the bond cold? Why hadn't he gotten in touch, and why hadn't anyone seen him since the battle ended?

You turned your head to the side, ready to throw up the small amount of food you had choked down earlier, when-

Y/N! You froze as you heard a familiar roar and couldn't place if it was something you had heard echoed around the stone room or through that precious bond you shared. 

Immediately, you turned from Cassian toward the sound of that shout, and your knees nearly buckled when you finally spotted Azriel walking through the fortress's entrance, bathed in his shadows. 

His eyes were wild as he scanned the room, looking for you. His hair was matted to his sweaty forehead, blood coated his face, and he was stalking forward with a slight limp. But he was alive. Alive.

"Az." You had barely whispered his name, but you watched as his eyes snapped to you, and something broke in his carefully carved facade as his gaze took you in. Pure, undiluted, raw relief settled on his face as he realised you were still here, unhurt and standing. 

Sobbing, you left your friend behind and ran towards your mate. He just stopped where he stood and held his arms out, catching you as you barrelled into him. He rocked ever so slightly back as he caught you, a testament to the exhaustion seeping through his body, but you felt that primal part of you that had been thrashing around your heart ease as his arms circled around you tightly and he buried his head in your hair - breathing you in.

"I thought I had lost you." You sobbed as you pushed your face into his neck, breathing in that comforting smell of night-chilled mist and cedar.

"I know, baby, I know." His beautiful, scarred hands gently stroked down your blood-soaked and matted hair as he continued to mumble, "I'm here. I'm safe. We're safe."

"What happened?" you asked as you pulled away ever so slightly from his body, letting your feet hit the unforgiving stone floor. Azriel's face was so tender, so soft, as his hands came up to cup your face. You watched, giving him a minute to scan your face for any injuries. A sigh left his lips when he noticed that you were largely unharmed apart from the usual cuts and scraps from battle. 

"Faebane," he muttered darkly, and you gasped. "One of the soldiers had some and threw it on my face when I got close. Clearly, they haven't got much, and it's a diluted solution leftover from the war with Hybern as it cleared quite quickly, but still…this is something we now have to factor in."

"I couldn't feel you down the bond." Your voice hitched.

"I couldn't feel you either, sweetheart, I didn't know if you still breathed. I was so scared." Another sob slipped through your lips, one of sadness but also one of relief as you gripped his Illyrian leathers and pulled him closer - unable to stand any distance between you. You rose up on your shaky legs and pressed your lips to his.

The kiss wasn't sweet or tender; it was demanding and all-consuming. It was a kiss between two mates who had been terrified that after their years of searching, they had lost each other. You felt the rumble of Azriel's moan as you tilted your head to get better access to his lips. His hand reached up to cup your head to hold you in place as he licked into your mouth, and his arm snapped around you as your legs finally gave out and caught you before you sank to the floor. 

You broke away gently, not going far as you rested your foreheads together. Your bodies heaved as you sucked in air for what felt like the first time since the battle ended. You closed the distance again to press your lips to his again, once, twice, thrice.

"I can't do this anymore, Az." You whispered, tears slipping down your face. Tears that Azriel captured with his thumbs as he looked at you with such devastation, "the wars, the battles, not knowing whether our friends are alive, not knowing if you are still alive. I have never felt so old."

"I know, sweetheart. I know." 

You both sighed as you felt the soldier hovering near you, waiting to catch your attention. Once, you would have known every soldier's name, but now you just had a vague recollection of his face. "Azriel. Y/N. I'm sorry to interrupt, but Rhysand has requested your presence."

Az pulled away slightly to nod at the soldier, who offered you both a respectful salute before leaving. You felt his scarred hand drift down your arm to grip your hand. You felt his squeeze, and you squeezed back, "Come on, love, let's go get this over with, and then let me take care of you."

…

The fortress was quieter now, as if everyone was holding their breath, waiting for the next attack; the next moment, you would all be dragged out onto the battlefield again to face your enemies. You and Az had been stuck in meetings for hours after that initial reunion, and you had felt so hollow as your friends recounted what they saw throughout the day, the tactics the enemies were using and how you stood a chance at defeating them once and for all if you hold strong. You hadn't let go of Az's hand the entire time, only letting go once he had told his story about the faebane and he had seen tears slipping down your cheeks again and had pulled you into his arms. 

A sadness clanged through your chest as you watched all of your friends that afternoon once the allies from other courts had left for their own war camps. Even through the exhaustion, the court of dreamers was still fighting, even though you had all been on the battlefield in a different war only a handful of years ago.

Azriel had made good on his promise. The minute Rhys commanded you to rest, Azriel gripped your cold hand and pulled you towards the room down the hall you were sharing. Immediately, he had asked a passing soldier to grab you a plate of food, something warm, before strolling into the room and firmly closing the door behind him. With such gentle hands, he had taken your frozen body and sat you down on the impressive four-poster bed in the centre of the room, your body sinking deeply into the comfy mattress. 

He firmly pressed a loving kiss to your forehead before moving away to stoke the fire that someone had forethought to start while you were in meetings. Once satisfied, he quickly looked back over his shoulder at you - to check you were ok - before moving into the expansive bathing chamber. You could hear his footsteps on the tiled floor and the water gushing out of the taps into the large bathtub, but you couldn't stop the fear from clawing up your throat. Panic began to settle in again because he was out of sight.

What your enemies would think at the mighty Y/N reduced to this quivering mess.

Just as you couldn't take the roaring in your head anymore, at the nausea swirling in your stomach, and were about to get up to run to his arms again, Azriel stepped back into the room. You must have been shouting down the bond again because he had a soft, sad look on his face. 

"I'm here, sweetheart." A whimper left your lips as you flew from the bed into his arms again, unable to get enough of the feeling of him, of being safe with him. His hand skated up and down your spine again, mumbling soothing words and pressing his lips into your hair: "I've drawn you a warm bath; come on."

You hadn't realised how much you had been shivering or how long you had been cold until the idea of settling into warm water felt so appealing. He smiled at you as he took your hands and guided you into the large bathing chamber. The bathtub sat in the middle of the room, large enough for not only you but also to accommodate wings, you realised. A soft smile fell on your lips at the thought.

In a comfortable silence that you and Az had always been able to enjoy, he gently began to unbuckle your damp and blood-encrusted leathers. With slow, methodical movements, he pulled the material from your body before throwing it into a basket in the corner of the room. You watched, your breathing shallow as Az ran his soft fingers up the exposed skin of your arms before hooking under the strap of your bra and removing it carefully from your body. Only then did his fingers skate down the soft valley of your breasts, over your abdomen, before slipping underneath the waistband of your underwear and slipping them down your thighs. Az had seen you in every state and had marked every inch of your skin with his lips and tongue, but this moment, him undressing you as you tried desperately to keep yourself from shattering, was the most intimate thing you had shared. It was warm and sweet, flecked with starlight.

That same warm smile was still on his lips as he took your hand and guided you into the warm water in the bathtub. An appreciative groan left your lips as your feet, legs, and body were submerged in comforting, warm water. 

You turned around and grinned at your mate as you watched him unbuckle his own leathers and shuck them off his body. You couldn't help gazing appreciatively at his body, that body you also knew as well as your own: the proud contours of his shoulders, the toned muscles of his arms, his chiselled abdomen, the thick, powerful thighs. He truly was sculpted by the gods themselves. 

Az silently padded over to the bathtub, slipping into the warm water himself before resting against one end and gently slipping his arm around your waist to pull you against him - your back pressed tightly against his chest. 

With a gentleness that you know would shock so many people, he reached to grab the washcloth and soap from the side before he lathered them up and softly washed the mud and blood from your body. He took his time, kneading his hands into your aching muscles. He even undid your tattered braid and carefully washed the blood and dirt from your hair. The moment was so loving and beautiful after what happened earlier in the day that you couldn't help the tears that silently slipped from your eyes and tracked down your cheeks. 

Once you were both clean, he pulled you flush against his chest again, letting you lean against him with your eyes closed as you enjoyed the feeling of being this close to him in the warm water. You idly traced the scars on his hand underneath the water where it was resting against your stomach whilst his other hand slid up and down your thigh, over your hip and up your body.

"I love you, Az." You whispered into the soft silence that had settled between you.

"I love you too, baby." You felt him press a kiss to your temple.

After today, after the horrors you had seen, after the panic that had coursed through your veins, you needed to feel something more. He wasn't close enough; you needed to feel him. Without saying a word, you lifted your free hand to gently grip the hand that was trailing up and down your body, stopping it in its lazy movements to slowly place it closer to that now throbbing part of you at the apex of your thighs. 

"Sweetheart?" He questioned quietly. You could sense through the bond his willingness to touch you and feel his want with the way his erection was pressed against your lower back. But he needed to check that you really wanted this and that he wouldn't overstep some line, especially after today. 

"Please, Az. I need you." You whimpered as you felt his slender fingers skim along your inner thigh.

"Relax, sweetheart, let me make you feel good." He rumbled against you as he gently began to press kisses under your ear, at that sweet spot he had found on that first night all those years ago. Your chest heaved as you felt his calloused fingertips trace up your thigh, over the curve of your hip, and along your bikini line before sensually slipping down to trace your slit.

A soft hiss escaped your lips at the feeling of his fingers so close to where you needed him most, a whimpering, "Please," leaving your lips as he chuckled behind you. His breath ghosted over the shell of your ear and caused a shiver to run down your spine. 

"I have worshipped your body for centuries, love," Azriel murmured, his strong nose nudging the side of your head so he could begin placing open-mouthed, hot kisses down your neck, "and I never get tired of hearing those noises you make when I touch you." 

You whined softly when Azriel moved his hand, but it was quickly silenced when you felt him suck on the soft flesh between your neck and shoulder as his strong hand gripped your thigh to move it to the outside of his so he had better access to you. 

One of his slender fingers returned to your centre and traced your slit once again before gently swirling around that bundle of nerves. A curse ripped from your lips as your hips bucked at the contact, and another primal chuckle rumbled up Azriel's chest at your delicious reaction. 

Azriel continued to swirl his finger ever so gently over your clit, every now and then applying the smallest amount of pressure and causing a sharp cry to leave your lips as white-hot pleasure shot up your body. It wasn't enough; he was teasing, and you needed your body to shatter in a way you were familiar with.

"Use your words, love. Tell me what you need." You could practically hear the smirk in his voice, and if you weren't wound up so tightly, you might have called him out on it. 

"Your fingers, Az. Please." You whimpered.

"Because you asked so nicely." He mumbled into your skin as he gently slid one finger into your core. A sharp cry left your lips at the feeling of those scars creating the most delicious friction against your walls. 

He set a slow but deep pace as he pumped his finger inside you, his thumb still drawing figures of eight on your clit. You could feel the pleasure building inside of you, your toes curling as you felt Azriel taking you higher and higher. His hand that you had been gripping, resting against your stomach, slid up your body to cup your breast. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as he expertly rolled your nipples between his fingers and tweaked them in the way he knew you liked. You could feel that familiar crest of your orgasm approaching, and he had barely touched you. So expertly knew your body. You threw your head back against his shoulder, unable to do much but go limp against him. 

"I love you so much, Y/N." He whispered, and you turned to face him and saw that raw emotion on his face again, an emotion that mirrored yours. As he slipped another finger inside you, curling his fingers to reach that spongy spot inside of you that had you seeing stars, you reached up to grip his hair and press your lips to his. 

You felt him grin against you as you kissed him, your hips undulating and rolling against his fingers to meet his lazy thrusts. The kiss was full of teeth and passion, and you felt the rising tide of your pleasure as you writhed against him. A cry left your lips as you felt yourself reaching the top of the wave, your mind turning foggy and hips bucking sloppily as you felt your orgasm approaching. 

"Let go, love, cum for me." His words, whispered lowly in your ear, his tone dripping lust and awe, and the soft thrust he gave behind you that had you feeling how much he was enjoying seeing you like this, caused that band in your body to snap and the pleasure he had been slowly building crest and shatter. Pure, white, hot pleasure sparked throughout your body, sending every nerve-ending alight as your orgasm washed over you. Chants of his name left his lips as your back arched and your hips thrashed as he continued to pump his fingers deliciously inside you.

After what felt like hours, the wave of pleasure began to subside and be replaced with a bone-deep satisfaction. A sigh left your lips as you slumped back against your mate, his arms catching you - as they always did - and pulling you close to him. You felt Azriel mumbling your name whilst pressing soft kisses to your temple, cheek and jawline. 

"Rest, love. There will be time for more later. I promise." It was that promise you clung to as you rested against your mate and let your body relax in the cooling water of the bath. 

[only-luce-the-goose]

Heeeey pookie!!

i loved your Arthur fic too much, the man deserves to receive more love here🥹🫶🫶 I have two ideas for you, which in my head make more sense. I will try to explain myself as best as I can but in reality this is not my strong point LMAO

If you want and can write something about loving every little thing the reader does, such as the habit of brushing his hair behind his ears or, for example, when he reads a book that she cries, smiles or curses as if he LOVES that about her. 😮‍💨💗

Or maybe something about him being a little jealous and possessive not in a grotesque sense like I had to defend her from someone in a bar or something, like her being too nice by not wanting to walk away so as not to hurt the other person even if it's bothering her (that happens to me often haha😅)

Maybee some of the care for her when she's sick 🥹🥹

Of course, only if you feel comfortable with these ideas, which were more than two, I apologize for that, I'm a little excited.🧍🏻‍♀️🫶🫶

(I hope I have made myself understood, also English is not my first language, I am sorry if this is complicated when read or understood, also sorry this was so long :(, anyway much love to you 💗💗💗💗)

Little things

A/N: I am going to write all of them, they're so cute. Arthur absolutely deserves more love, he's underrated. Don't worry btw, your English is fantastic. I'm actually Australian so my spelling of certain words are different to everyone else's 😅. Keep an eye on my page for the next few days, I'll release them soon (I just need to finish my uni assignment first, whoops 🤷‍♀️). I hope I did what you were thinking 🫶🫶

Arthur Leclerc x reader

Warnings: Fluffy/Simp Arthur

Synopsis: "If you want and can write something about loving every little thing the reader does, such as the habit of brushing his hair behind his ears or, for example, when he reads a book that she cries, smiles or curses as if he LOVES that about her. 😮‍💨💗" - This part of the request.

You and Arthur were lying on the couch watching a movie after a long day. You propped up my pillows with Arthur on top of you, head resting on your chest. Your fingers started to scratch the back of his scalp, slowly worth their way up. He sighed as he pressed himself deeper into you, nuzzling his face into your skin. He lifted his head up and pecked your lips. You look down at him and giggled, “what was that for, baby?”. He looked up at you with a peaceful smile, his eyes brimming with love as he replied “just appreciating the small things” before resting his head back on your chest as you kept scratching his head.

The next time it happened, you guys were cuddled up in bed and you were reading a book. It might be one of the saddest books you had ever read in your life (for this I’m gonna use “Bridge to Terabithia” cuz I feel like everyone read it for school). You got the the chapter where the girl fell into the creek and drowned. The pure amount of detail broke your heart and sent you into a sobbing mess. Your sniffles caught Arthur’s attention, he looked down the see his shirt beginning to get wet. He pulled you up to face him as we wiped your tears. “Hey hey hey what happened mi amor?” He rushed. You explained what happened, causing Arthur to give you that look again. A peaceful smile, eyes brimming with love, he pecked your lips, “how about we read a happier book?” He suggested. “No” you said as you made eye contact again “I just wanna cuddle”. He grinned and settled down, pulling you into him “that is something I can definitely do”. You smiled as you tucked yourself into his side.

Another instance was when you and Arthur were walking through the paddock. The crowd was pushing and shoving, sweeping you away with them. Arthur quickly realised you had gotten caught up, jogging back to guide you again. You think your right hand to his left, your left hand coming up to hold his strong bicep on the same arm, basically wrapping yourself around his arm. You have his hand a little squeeze, leaning your head on his shoulder when he squeezed back. You made it to the Ferrari garage and you knew you would need to let go but you didn’t want to, do you didn’t. Arthur planted a kiss on your forehead and gave you that dopey, in love look he gives you in moments like these. “What?” You laughed. Arthur pecked your lips “nothing my love” he mumbled against them, “just admiring” he winked. Just like a school girl, you giggled and then cuddled into him, are grip still tight on his arm.

What really stood out is when you were cleaning your shared apartment. You were going through your shared closet when you found a brown leather book. The title on the inside of the book, in Arthur’s unmistakeable handwriting, was “those moments”. You flicked through the book and saw dates and times, which matched to all the moments when Arthur gave you the look. Scratching his head on the couch, crying at a book, being clingy at the paddock, it was all there. What you didn’t know, was that Arthur was leaning on the door frame, watching you read his little things journal. “Find something good, amor?” You jumped at his question. “I’m so so sorry. I shouldn’t be snooping but I’ve never seen it before, and I had no idea what it was for. I’m sorry, I should’ve given you your privacy an-” Arthur cut you off with a kiss. “Im glad you found it. Everytime you ask about this “look” I give you, you now know what I was feeling and thinking. Is that ok amor?” He has a glimmer of home in his eyes as he asks you. You put the book back where you got it from, wrapped your hands around his neck and kissed him deep “of it is, I love you Arthur” “I love you mi amor”

[rxmqnova]

Hay:)

Can you write something like Natasha and Reader in high school. Nat having her reputation of course and her friends, which is really important to her while reader is more of the outcast and "an easy target" for Nats friends. Nat does laugh along of course for the sake of her reputation. But the second they're alone Nat gets all submissive almost begging for her girlfriends/readers attention and touch. It's just how they work.

Are you done yet?

NO ONE'S POV Opening her locker to take her books for the next lesson, Y/N doesn't notice the group making her way over to her.

"Well, well, well. Look who's that" Tony's annoying voice rings through the girl's ears, making her roll her eyes and just ignore them.

And it works for a few seconds until her locker gets shut right in front of her face by the youngest and newest memeber of that group, Peter.

Y/N glares at the younger boy, turning around to walk away but locking her eyes with none other than Natasha, her girlfriend.

It's been over a year since the two started dating, yet they still haven't told anyone. While Natasha's the 'popular' one, Y/N is the 'outcast' and those two groups just don't mix, that's the rule.

But it still happened when the two were assigned for a project together last year. They spent a lot of time working on it together and Natasha realized that Y/N is actually a really sweet girl.

Though Natasha still wants to keep her 'reputation', so they haven't told anyone and the group keeps making Y/N's life a living hell. And even though Y/N sees Natasha's point, it just annoys her. Luckily, it's only for the next few months and then they'll be both out of that school.

A pair of strong arms stops the girl from walking away. Turning around she finds another group member… Steve.

"Alright, let's get this over with" She sighs out. "What is it today? Is there anything wrong with my hair? My clothes? My make-up?" She raises an eyebrow, having enough of this. Every single day it's the same and Y/N is so done with it.

"Everything! You look like a clown!" Peter blurts out, desperately trying to fit in.

"Nice. Thanks. Is that all? Can I go?" Y/N questions annoyed.

"No" Tony says, making the girl let out another sigh. Suddenly he just takes Y/N's books, throwing them on the ground on which the entire group laughs, including Natasha who doesn't think that's funny but just laughs along anyway.

"Idiots" Y/N sighs, kneeling down to pick up her books once the group is gone.

———

"Hey" Natasha smiles softly at her girlfriend who only just opened the door for her, standing at the porch of Y/N's house. "Are you okay after this morning?"

"Why wouldn't I be? Your friends are just a bunch of idiots. Come in" Y/N brushes it off, stepping aside, so Natasha could come in.

"I'm sorry they're acting like that to you" Natasha sighs, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend and pulling her in for a warm hug.

"It's fine, Nat. Really. I'm used to it. I would have been much happier if you said something, but I know how much you care about your reputation. I'm currently finishing writing my essay, I'll just finish it real quick and get right back to you" Y/N smiles, leading the redhead upstairs to her bedroom.

"How about a movie?" Natasha suggests. She absolutely loves cuddling with her girlfriend, so watching a movie is definitely a great opportunity to get some cuddles.

"Sounds good. You can choose one while I finish the essay" Y/N smiles, pecking Natasha's lips with a kiss before walking over to her desk and sitting down while Natasha takes a seat on bed.

It takes only a few minutes until Natasha has the movie chosen and even switched on the TV. Now she's just sitting on her girlfriend's bed, watching as Y/N's typing some words to her computer.

"Are you nearly done?" Natasha asks impatiently, making her girlfriend chuckle.

"Nearly, just need to write the ending" Y/N shoots her girlfriend a quick smile before turning around and getting back to writing.

Natasha only hums in response, deciding to check up what's new on Instagram while waiting. And once again it doesn't last long.

She sighs, standing up and walking over to her girlfriend, wrapping arms around her and pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

"Are you done yet?"

"Gosh, you're like a child" Y/N lets out a chuckle, pressing a kiss to Natasha's hand. "You asked me like 3 minutes ago"

Making Natasha sigh, Y/N gets back to writing once again, though the way Natasha's impatiently waiting and scanning the screen of her laptop is kinda distracting.

"Natty, can you just wait on the bed for me? You're distracting me a bit. I need to concentrate" Y/N says as nicely as possible, receiving a whine from her girlfriend.

"Can't you just finish it later? I want to cuddle with you" Natasha says with a sigh, pulling her girlfriend up.

"It's due tomorrow, Nat. I really need to finish it. I promise it won't take more than 10 minutes" Y/N sighs, gently pushing Natasha to sit on her bed before going back to her previous seat.

"You're so mean" Natasha sighs once again, a pout on her face on which Y/N can't help but laugh a little.

Natasha's growing impatience just doesn't allow her to wait. She asks the same question 'Are you done yet?' nearly every 2 minutes until Y/N finally finishes.

"Finally, can I get my cuddles now?" Natasha questions, her eyebrow raising which makes Y/N chuckle.

"Now you can get as many cuddles as you want"

----------------------

Natasha Romanoff masterlist

Masterlist

[bambihrt]

Celebrating your Anniversary with Lucifer Part 2

I wasn't planning on writing a second part but after seeing how loved part one was I just had to so enjoy!

Lucifer considered himself a nervous demon. Blame his abandonment issues for that. He knew you loved him, but he couldn't help his anxiety telling him that you'd leave just like everyone else has. One night when sleep couldn't find him, he snuck into his workshop to fiddle with his ducks to distract him from his worries. All of a sudden he felt two arms circle his neck and you nuzzle to his left side.

"C'mon baby, you can work tomorrow, let's go to bed."

Though he knew he wouldn't be able to fall asleep, he took your hand and let you lead him to your shared bedroom. As he crawled under the covers, you snuggled up next to him. holding him as you pet his hair. Throughout this whole encounter, he was silent and had a distant look in his eyes. You could see through this act immediately and knew what the cause of his nighttime anxiety was.

"I can't wait to wake up next to you forever. I'll always be here with you Lucifer. I love you."

After that night you made sure to always validate his feelings when he was having a moment of low self-esteem. You started leaving notes around your home for him to find at random moments. Opening the pantry he'd find a note on his favorite cereal telling him 'good morning lu!' and opening his tool box he'd find another post-it saying 'can't wait to see what you create :D'. Through these little actions, he'd learned to trust that you will be there for him.

One day while you were out to see your friends he was having a bit of a depressive episode and didn't want to bother you while you were enjoying yourself so he went into your office. He grabbed your favorite plushie knowing it would smell like you and give him comfort. As he turned the stuffed animal in his arms he felt a crinkle and pulled what was stuck on it off. A note reading 'call me love :('. This moment was when he knew.

Lucifer had to marry you. Nothing would make him happier than the honor of being your husband.

Bringing him back to the present day, he watched you try and hook a golden duck for him in the game you made. Of course, you would do something so special for your anniversary. You weren't the only one with a surprise up your sleeve. He checked his watch noting it was almost time.

"(Y/n)? My love? I've left my phone inside I-"

"Oh I'll go grab it don't worry," you immediately cut him off not wanting to make him go in on his own. As you headed inside the hotel, you were met with a trail of rose petals leading you under the chandelier. "What is this?"

Unbeknownst to you, Lucifer was walking behind you and cleared his throat stealing your attention away from the grand decor around you. He got down on one knee and pulled a box out of his pocket.

"I thought it was only fitting to do this in the very place we met and on our anniversary. From the moment I met you, I knew you were special. You showed me the light when I was stuck in a dark place and ever since then, I've loved you more than anything. You have been the best partner I could ever dream of. There's only one thing that could make my life perfect and that would be you agreeing to marry me. (Y/n) my heart and soul, will you allow me to be your husband?"

Nodding, you couldn't get the words out as you began crying. You had no idea Lucifer had been planning this. A high-pitched squeal came from behind as Charlie jumped out throwing rose petals over you, "I'm so happy you're joining our family!"

Lucifer reached out to your hand, slipping the most beautiful ring you'd ever seen onto your finger, and gently pulled you into a tender kiss. Softly whispering, "Thank you for everything, my love."

[yawnderu]

My life is falling apart - could you write how Ghost might save reader from her emotionally abusive and toxic husband? I thank you, maybe one day I'll have someone like Simon.

Whoever you are, I'm here for you if you need to talk. Stay strong sweetheart, this too shall pass. 💖

CW: Emotional abuse, toxic relationships, hurt/comfort, protective Simon Riley.

Simon had sneaked his way into your life with the same stealth he uses on missions— a man who barely spent any time at his apartment and was always away for what he said was just ''work''. The same man who after a few conversations, started bringing you small gifts from his missions, always something different that he thought you'd like.

Simon isn't dumb— far from it, he's always aware of his surroundings and throughout the years, he knows how to read people well. That's why it breaks him to see the way your smiles now came accompanied with a nervous look in your eyes whenever your husband was home, despite you and Simon simply being friendly towards one another.

Whenever he was back at his apartment, he started listening more and more. Paying even more attention to you, ear pressed against the wall while he listened to your husband berate you for a plethora of reasons, all of them more absurd than the other, the truth heavy on his shoulders, weighting him down like Atlas holding the sky.

Oh, how he wanted nothing more than to go inside your house and ravage your husband the same way he does so casually in the battlefield— but he can't. Simon Riley is not Ghost. Simon has to lay low, to ensure both his safety and yours, so he starts planning. Planning how to approach the issue, how to get you out of the situation and understand you better. He'd never admit it, but he spent the entire night reading the experiences of other married women when it comes to abusive marriages, restless dreams full of ideas on how in the bloody hell he'll get you out of this.

He waits until the next day once your husband leaves for work, waiting out five minutes that feel eternal just to make sure he doesn't come back. Unmasked and with very faint stains of eye black that he never seems to be able to fully remove, he knocks on your door. You answer with teary eyes, sniffling softly as you try your best to give him a small smile, yet he can see the pain. The same pain he saw in his mother's eyes his entire life.

''Simon!'' You greet, moving aside so he can enter your house, closing the door behind you as you both go to the living room.

''Would you like a cuppa?'' You offer and it takes him a few seconds to decide, ultimately nodding his head. Maybe this will be easier if you're both having a nice, warm drink. You come back minutes later with a tray and some crumpets, something you started buying when he casually mentioned liking them.

''Thank you.'' He takes a sip of the perfectly made chamomile tea, done the way he loves it— with two teaspoons of honey and hot. You give him a happier smile, the warmth of his presence wrapping around you like a secure blanket, a far cry from your marriage.

''Love...'' He begins and your full attention goes to him, noticing his serious tone and pensive expression.

''There's no easy way to say this, but with this place having thin walls, I sometimes hear things I shouldn't.'' You immediately know what he's talking about, but before you can apologize on behalf of your husband, he keeps speaking.

''You deserve so much better.'' He puts his cup down, eyes looking down to his hands— the hands he keeps ungloved just for you, the hands that are protected by his skull gloves whenever he's out in missions, so he can come back to you free of sin. He sits down next to you, one of his arms wrapping around your back reassuringly.

''Why are you still with him?'' There's a hint of desperation in his tone, thin eyebrows furrowed as he looks at you. You want to look away, but his brown eyes are almost hypnotic. So expressive, so telling whenever words aren't enough.

''I... I don't know.'' You reply with honesty, tone strained as you hold back tears and try to dig into your brain for any reasons you're with the man, yet nothing comes up. ''I don't have anywhere else to go to.''

Your words hurt him as much as they hurt you, looking at the potential you have that is being wasted on some ungrateful wanker who berates you for the smallest things.

''Run away with me.'' He suggests in a spur of the moment and before he can even process his own words, a small giggle escapes your lips. He raises an eyebrow as he looks down at you, curious as to what's so funny. Your giggling stops when you notice the expression on his face.

''You're serious?'' You ask carefully, not wanting to make a fool of yourself despite knowing he'd never joke about something like that.

''I'm serious, love. We could go somewhere far away from here, safe. You can leave all of this behind, just say the word.''

''I...'' He can see your hesitancy, his warm hand rubbing circles on your back while the other one holds your hand, thumb rubbing the back of your hand reassuringly.

''What if he finds me?'' It's the first question that comes to mind, not wanting to deal with more of his abuse if you ever manage to get away.

''He won't, doll. I can promise you that. I'll get some of my mates to watch out for you when I'm busy at work, if it helps you.'' He knows it will, and he already has highly trusted friends from the 141 in mind to watch out for you whenever he goes on solo missions.

It took almost two hours of convincing before you agreed, and that's where you are now. He's helping you inform the police about your situation and why you're going away, just in case your husband tries to report you missing.

Most of your belongings were left at the house, but... it surprisingly doesn't bother you. It'll be a new beginning, the same furniture that has witnessed years of abuse is now left behind, only a few clothes inside his car while you both leave the police station. You take a deep breath, the warmth of the sun washing over your skin as you close your eyes, a sincere smile on your face for the first time in years.

''Thank you, Simon.'' My angel, my savior.

[smoooothoperator]

What Was I Made For?

17: Happier Than Ever

childhood enemies, forced proximity, accidental pregnancy, enemies to lovers (👀)

Warnings: Charles pov, fluff, Athena

a/n: HIIIIII!!!!! So we have the gender reveal!!! Before reading, please write a comment saying what do you think it will be!!

if you want to play a game and ask things about Dafne

Masterlist

Pinterest

previous part | next part

If you want to be tagged don't forget to message me!

Every way of feedback is very welcomed

My heart was light, soaring with excitement like never before. 

I missed Dafne over the week. I missed waking up next to her. I missed kissing her, holding her, feeling the kicks of our baby.

During the training camp in the Dolomites, I couldn’t forget the image of Dafne’s sad eyes as I left. Her absence was like a persistent ache that followed me everywhere.

“Promise me you will call every night” she whispered softly, with her head nestled against my chest and her arm wrapped around me. “That you will be safe”

“You don't have to worry, Dafne” I whispered back, kissing her head. “I will be safe, won't do stupid things and make sure to come back”

“You promise?” she mumbled, looking up at me.

“I promise, my love” I smiled, kissing her forehead. “I'll always come back”

The last day of my stay in the Dolomites, she called, and for the first time she opened her heart for me, talking about what she concerns and what is troubling her. And in that moment I wished she was with me, that she told me everything in person, because watching her cry through the screen of my phone broke my heart.

That's the reason why I wanted to have a special day with her, to have a date with her. Discovering the gender of our baby, alone, was something we needed.

I saw people taking pictures of me while I drove around Monaco, some of them stopped when they saw me get out of Dafne's car, walking towards me to take pictures or asking me to sign things. And all of them had amazing and cheerful words for me and Dafne.

“What made you this happy?” she teased, looking at me through the mirror.

“Some fans stopped me to take pictures and they cheered for me and Dafne. I even recorded them saying those words to show Dafne the video” I smiled. “Oh, that today we are going to find out the gender of the baby”

“What? But aren't you two supposed to make a gender reveal with the family and friends?” she gasped. “You little liar!”

“I know, we will!” I laughed, feeling how my mom pinched my cheek. “But… Lately Dafne has been feeling down. It's hard for her this new life and I wanted to do something meaningful for her”

“And you think finding the gender will make her feel better?” she sighed. “Charles… Things are not as simple as that”

“I know it, mom” I sighed. “But… She has trust issues. With me. She doesn't trust me how I wanted, yet. And even if I'm making everything easier for her, taking care of her… I feel that I have to do more, try harder. She's… I don't know how to explain it because I don't want to sound dramatic, but I think the pregnancy and everything that comes with it might give her depression”

My mom stopped using the scissors and placed them on the small table next to her. She placed her hands on my shoulders and sighed, looking at me through the mirror, again.

“It is true that what will come next will be hard” she nodded. “You have to be there, next to her, all the time. You have to show her that you really care, that you want the kid”

“I want the kid, mom” I whisper. “I wanted it since the moment I knew about it”

“You will have to make sacrifices, Charles” she sighed. “You will have to take decisions that will make you have to choose between the good of the team or your family”

A lump formed in my throat as I nodded, the weight of her words sinking into my chest. I took a deep breath, trying to steady the whirlwind of thoughts spinning in my head.

Job or family. A championship or my child. Wins or the woman I love. Sacrifices.

“Will you tell me the gender?” she asked, changing the subject.

“Oh, no” I laughed. “You are not supposed to know that we will discover it today”

“Mhm, sure” she laughed.

I took a deep breath and smiled weakly.

Sacrifices.

The season is yet to start and I have to choose how I will act. I want to give my everything, win for Dafne. I want to make her proud. But… I want to be in every milestone of our kid. I want to be on every appointment she has, I want to be in those classes of birth preparation, I want to be there when our kid comes to the world. 

I want to be a family man. But I want to win, too.

“I'm sure you'll find the perfect balance” my mom smiled, kissing the back of my head after she finished cutting my hair.

“Yeah… I hope so” I sighed, smiling weakly.

I got up and hugged my mom tightly, kissing her cheeks before heading out of her hair salon. I have to stop by my apartment and get changed and leave her car in the garage, next to the identical car I own butin black. 

When I walked in my apartment and went to my bedroom I smiled, taking a deep breath when I noticed that somehow her perfume was still there, even if it already happened some weeks since she came. 

I took a deep breath, opening my wardrobe and finding a pink shirt. Pink, because I really want to have a little Dafne.

I looked around and took a deep breath, going to the cupboard and opening the drawers. Inside one of them, there was a blue box, with the gift I had bought for her birthday but never had the chance of giving it to her. 

I opened the box, smiling weakly at it.

I have to fix things. Is the last thing I can do.

Three months have passed since that night, since the day I knew I ruined things with her.

But I needed to stop the war. I was determined to raise the white flag and ask for a truce, telling her that I give up in this fight we have been keeping up since forever.

Today, 6th of December, is Dafne's birthday.

I saw the people around the hospitality getting the upstairs floor ready for her, decorating the tables and putting her favorite snacks on plates. Her family arrived with a cake for her, but no one saw her yet.

“Where is Dafne?” I asked her older sister Erica.

“Oh, she'll come soon” she sighed. “She had to go to the airport to pick up Sebastian”

“Who?” I frowned, feeling a knot on my chest.

“Sebastian” she repeated. “The man she's going out with”

“Oh” I sighed, swallowing thickly. “She's… Dating him?”

“I'm sure they will, soon” she nodded. “Why?”

“Oh, nothing” I swallowed thickly.

I started to doubt if she ever wanted to talk to me ever again, feeling how she already passed a page on our story, if we ever had one.

When she walked into the hospitality and went upstairs, everyone started to cheer for her. But the only thing I could see was how that man, the so-called Sebastian, looked at her the same way I look at her whenever she's not looking, and how he hugs her and kisses her head. But what buried deeper the knife on my chest was watching how she smiled at him and how he smiled at her.

And somehow, the box inside of my backpack was useless in that moment. Somehow, the words on my mind were empty, worthless. 

I took a deep breath and sighed, shaking my head trying to erase that memory. That's the past.

I grabbed the box and put it on my backpack, getting ready to leave to go to the airport.

Things are going to be okay. Dafne and I are going to be okay.

The three-hour flight dragged like an eternity. My leg bounced restlessly, and all I could think about was landing. I pictured myself walking through the exit door, flowers in hand, and seeing Dafne’s smile, maybe even kissing her.

The smile started to grow on my lips slowly, waiting until the flight attendants said that it was safe to leave the plane.

I walked around the terminal, searching for somewhere I could buy her something. I smiled when I found a flower shop, walking towards it and searching around the store to find her favorite flower.

“Oh, is there something you like?” the lady asked.

“Do you have carnations?” I asked. “My… My girlfriend likes them”

“Oh, carnations” she smiled. “Red?”

“Yeah” I nodded. 

“Carnation… It holds a beautiful meaning, you know?” the woman said, walking around her store and collecting the flowers. “Love, devotion, fascination… The red carnations mean romantic love and affection”

Her words made my heart quicken, each syllable a reminder of how much I love Dafne.

“Then it's the perfect flower” I smiled, grabbing the bouquet she made.

“You might love that girl so much” she smiled.

“Oh, I do” I smiled. “She's the mother of my child. The best thing that happened to me”

“Mhm, you do sound in love” she smiled.

“I am” smiled.

I walked out of the store after paying, following everyone who was walking towards the exit door. Just thinking that she's waiting for me makes me walk faster and faster.

When the door opened in front of me and I saw her,�� I couldn't stop smiling. But as I walked closer to her watching how she was hugging herself and biting her lip nervously, I tried to slow down and walk calmly towards her.

“Her, my love” I smiled, giving her the flowers and kissing her forehead.

“O-oh… Thank you” she smiled weakly looking at the flowers. “You didn't have to”

“I wanted to” I smiled, kissing her forehead again. “How… How are you?”

“Eh… Yeah, good” she mumbled. ,

“Love, is everything okay?” I frowned, worried. She was barely smiling. “Hey…”

“Let's go back home” she sighed, walking away towards the elevators.

Definitely, there's something wrong.

I sighed, walking next to her and reaching for her hand. I held it tightly, rubbing soft my thumb over her knuckles. I could feel she was nervous, looking around with her head facing the floor.

“Dafne, are you okay?” I whispered.

“Don't worry” she sighed.

We walked towards the car, my car. And in that moment, alone in the parking lot, I could see her. She is wearing a pink dress and her belly is a little bigger than last week. 

“You look so gorgeous, Dafne” I whispered, walking towards her and holding her hands. “So beautiful, so…”

“Can we please go home?” she insisted, nervous. “Please”

“Hey, what is wrong?” I frowned, cupping her cheeks and making her look at me. “Dafne, tell me what's wrong?”

“I…” she sighed, swallowing thickly. “I couldn't find Athena this, neither last night”

“Hey” I sighed, rubbing her cheeks. “She will be okay, yeah? Maybe she slept all night inside a wardrobe and she couldn't listen”

“I know, but…” she swallowed thickly. 

“Love” I whisper, kissing her forehead. “Athena is okay, I promise. Now, can you smile, please?”

She took a deep breath and looked at me, holding my wrists and sighing. There was still that worry in her eyes, but after she looked into my eyes, I could see the little relief.

“I missed you, so much” she finally said, wrapping her arms around me, and I could feel her belly too. 

“I missed you two, too” I smiled, pressing my lips on hers softly. “Come on, let's go back home, okay?”

She nodded slowly and sighed, kissing my lips again before resting her head on my chest. We stayed like this for a while, holding each other.

“I'm sorry I doubted you” she mumbled. “I just… I-”

“I know, Dafne” I whisper, swallowing thickly. “But I want you to know that I would do everything for this family. For you and our baby. You are my priority. You mean everything for me and I won't stop showing you that until you believe it. I won't stop showing you that I love you, even if we have an stupid argument”

She looked at me with wide eyes, blushing softly. And it only made me smile and kiss her lips again.

I don't care if there's people around, I don't care if they are taking pictures of us. We are two people in love, that show each other love. What's wrong with that? 

I held her hand and walked her to the passenger seat, laughing when I saw her roll her eyes. 

“Come on, just relax” I laughed softly.

I walked around the car and opened the driver's door, sitting behind the wheel and chuckling when she was pouting softly.

“Did you like the car?” I laughed.

“Of course I did!” she exclaimed. “God, it's so comfortable and so smooth to drive!”

I laughed softly and drove out of the parking, holding Dafne's hand and squeezing it softly. I know she's still worried, that she's still distant. But I will make her happy, I'll make sure she smiles as long as she lets me stay with her.

“You know the way to the cake shop?” she asked me and I smiled nodding. 

“Yeah, I used to go with your sisters to go buy the cannolli we always had in summer” I nodded. “Erica said that when it's your birthday they always came to the house to celebrate it because of the cakes”

“O-oh… right” she chuckled. “God, I still remember the cake I had for my last birthday… It made me throw up so bad”

“Maybe it was the pregnancy nausea?” I chuckled, playing with the ring of her finger.

“Oh no, no” she laughed. “It was the filling… I hated it so much. My parents tried their best to buy a cake similar to the one I love, but no one makes it as this shop”

I nodded, smiling when I remembered her face after trying that cake. And then it made me remember what I have on my backpack. I'll give it to her later.

“Then I guess the way of finding out the gender will be your favorite” I smiled, bringing her hand to my lips and kissing it softly. 

“Oh yeah, a sweet way” she chuckled.

I smiled looking at her, breathing the scent of the flowers I gifted her. There is something about her, like a glow she radiates with the pregnancy, that makes my heart beat so fast. Maybe it's the way her hand is always rubbing her belly, or how her cheeks are so filled and pinky. Or maybe it's her hair that somehow looks healthier and shinier, brunette again.

“You are staring” she said, squeezing my hand.

“Can't help it, there's a beautiful woman sitting next to me” I chuckled. “That happens to be so beautifully pregnant with my child”

“Idiot” she laughed softly.

I smiled, patting her thigh softly as she laughed, holding my hand.

When I drove inside of the village and parked the car in front of the cake shop, she smiled unbuckling herself and getting out of the car. Some minutes later, she walked out with a white box in her hands, happy.

“It's so beautiful, look” she said, opening the box after she sat in the car. “Guido said that the inside of it will be of the color of the gender and it has blueberry with lemon jam if it's a boy and strawberry and raspberries jam if it's a girl”

“Amazing” I smiled, kissing her cheek.

I drove to the house and when I parked the car, she got out, walking to the backyard and placing the box on top of the table she had already settled.

“I…” she took a deep breath looking at the house. 

“Let her sleep” I chuckled softly, kissing her head. “She's an old lady cat, nine years might be a lot”

“She's not old…” she sighed. “But… Yeah, I'll let her sleep”

I smiled and nodded, kissing her forehead and walking towards the table and sitting next to her.

“Are you ready?” I asked, trying to keep my voice steady as I grabbed the knife.

“Yeah” she smiled looking at me, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.

Together, we carefully made the first cut into the cake. I could feel her hand trembling slightly, and I placed mine over hers, steadying it as we sliced through the soft icing.

My heart pounded in my chest as she slowly lifted the slice, revealing the color hidden inside.

Blue. With blueberry and lemon jam.

For a moment, we both just stared at it, the blue filling our vision. And then, I felt a wave of surprise wash over me, quickly followed by a rush of pure joy. I turned to Dafne, who was looking at me with wide eyes, a smile spreading across her face.

“It’s a boy!” I exclaimed, the words tumbling out of my mouth before I even realized it.

Dafne’s smile grew wider, her eyes sparkling with happiness. She got up from the chair and looked at me, then at the cake.

“A boy,” she repeated, her voice full of wonder. “We’re having a boy!”

The surprise quickly gave way to laughter, a light, joyous laughter that bubbled up from both of us as we stood there, holding each other close, doing little jumps on the place.

The idea of having a son was unexpected, but it filled me with a sense of excitement I hadn’t anticipated. 

“A little boy,” I smiled. “Our son.”

“He’s going to be amazing, Charles. I can already picture him… The little boy I fell in love…” she smiled looking at me.

I rested my hand on her belly, feeling the kicks under my palm and my heart swelled with emotion. It didn’t matter that we had been thinking about a girl. This boy, our son, was already the center of our world.

“He’s going to be incredible,” I said softly, kissing her forehead. “I can’t wait to teach him everything, to see him grow up”

“He will have a great father” she smiled, with her eyes filled with tears. 

“And he will have an amazing mother” I replied, with my voice full of happiness. “He’s already so loved, Dafne. We’re going to give him everything.”

“I can’t believe it,” she laughed, looking at the cake again, wiping away the tears that fell down her cheeks. “A boy…”

“A little Morelli Leclerc” I whisper against her lips. “Our son”

I smiled, pressing my lips against hers and kissing her deeply, holding her against me. And then I remembered the box inside of my backpack.

“I have something for you” I whisper, cupping her cheeks.

“Oh? What is it?” she smiled.

I pulled away and reached for my backpack, opening it and grabbing the box. I smiled, placing the box in her hands, taking a deep breath as she looked at the silver ring.

“I was going to give it to you on your birthday” I sighed. “Because I wanted to apologize, to talk about everything that happened between us… But I couldn’t”

“Oh, Charles…” she smiled weakly, grabbing the ring and putting it on her finger.

“But now, watching it…” I smiled, laughing as I looked at the blue stone of her birthstone and then at the blue cake. “I think it's fate. Blue for your birthstone and our baby… Our beautiful boy”

The day unfolded with a warmth that felt almost divine, as if some benevolent force had gifted us this perfect, sunlit moment.

But when we walked back inside the house, I could feel her happiness somehow disappearing.

“Athena?” she called out, her voice filled with worry, sending a sharp ache of unease through me.

The white and brown beautiful cat didn't walk to receive us. Not even made a sound.

“Please…” she mumbled.

“Hey, hey” I frowned standing next to her. “We’ll find her, okay? Maybe she’s just found a cozy spot somewhere, tucked away where she feels safe.”

“It’s just… She bas been acting weird, and I don't know why” she mumbled. 

“Love, Athena will be okay” I said, cupping her cheeks. 

How can something like this ruin our happiness? How could this had happened?

“We're going to find her, okay?” I whisper, bringing her close to me, wrapping my arms around her. “We are going to find her, give her so much love, and then tomorrow we'll go to the village’s vet, okay?”

She nodded slowly against my chest, taking deep breaths. I kissed the top of her head, rubbing her back. She pulled away after some seconds, looking at the stairs and signing.

“Lately she liked to sleep in your room” she sighed. 

“Then we'll search for her there” I said, holding her hand and walking upstairs.

The door of the room was open, and the bed was empty. The cat is not there. 

I looked around, searching every place she could hide with the light of my phone, sighing when I didn't see her under the bed or behind the curtains.

“Could she be in the wardrobe?” I suggested, glancing over at Dafne, who sat anxiously on the edge of the bed.

She sat on the bed, her breath coming in shallow, uneven sighs, one hand soothingly circling her belly while the other pressed against her aching back.

“Hey” I smiled weakly walking towards her, kneeling in front of her. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah… Just..” she sighed, taking a deep breath. “Until now I never thought that being pregnant and having to kneel and look under the bed was this hard. My back hurts a little…”

“It's okay” I smile, kissing her head. 

I walked to the wardrobe, opening the doors and looking over the shelves, between the clothes. I turned on the light of my phone and searched with it, until I saw a pair of eyes blinking slowly at me.

“Here you are, little one,” I murmured with a soft smile, my heart sinking at the weak  sound of her meow. 

But as I lifted her, the truth hit me. Athena was alarmingly light, her body fragile, and she barely mustered the strength to resist.

“Oh, my baby” she gasped, walking towards me and touching the cat’s head.

“She's so thin, Dafne” I whisper, surprised. “She wasn't like this when I left…”

Taking a deep breath, I pulled her close, our worried embrace sandwiching the fragile cat between us.

“How could I never notice?” she whispered, hugging the cat that was purring low. “I thought it was like everytime we moved out, or a big change happened. But… God, with the baby, and you being here, I didn't notice how much weight she has lost”

I took a deep breath and held her against me, with the cat between us. I really don't know what to say, I thought today was going to be an amazing day for us, that we were going to celebrate and be happy.

“Why don't we try feeding her, hm?” I whisper, with my lips pressed against her hair. “Give her that wet food she loves. We will take care of her and tomorrow morning I'll call the vet so he will come here to check on her again, okay?”

She nodded slowly, giving soft kisses on Athena's head.

“She's just an old lady that wants attention” I whispered, trying to cheer her up. “She knew today we were going to have a date, only the two of us, and got jealous”

“She missed you, too” she whispered. “She always slept in your bed during this week”

“See? She was jealous because you were going to spend time with me” I chuckled, rubbing Dafne's back. “You'll see, now she has our attention and tomorrow this little diva will be screaming for attention”

She sighed, looking up at me and smiling weakly. Athena was looking at us, and somehow I could see the pain in her big blue eyes. But I have to be strong, for Dafne.

“Come on, let's feed her” I said, holding her hand and walking out of the room, going to the kitchen.

Athena is Dafne's first pet ever, the first thing she invested in when she had her first salary after giving classes in the karting during summer while she was seventeen. And she loves that cat as her daughter.

“How can I be a good mother if I can't see how sick she looks…” she mumbled, making me look at her and frown.

“Dafne… My love” I sighed, cupping her cheeks. “You will be a great mother. This is something natural. You can't understand what a cat wants. They don't cry or talk to let us know how they feel. Just think that you took her to the vet the other day and she's with medication, okay? And that tomorrow she might feel better”

She clenched her jaw and sighed, leaving Athena on the table as we sat on the chairs. We tried to feed her with wet cat food and make her drink water slowly.

I don't know how long we stayed in the kitchen, maybe hours. But after the can was empty and the cat jumped out of the table, I looked out of the window and sighed when it was midnight.

“It's late, we should go to bed” I sighed looking at Dafne.

The happiness that filled her eyes during the entire afternoon was now gone. Worry made her smile disappear, biting her lip nervously.

“Hey” I sighed, moving her chair to keep her close to me. “She will be okay. Don't worry, okay?”

“I just… I feel so bad” I sighed. “She's old, kinda. And it just makes me panic everytime she gets sick… I don't want her to leave…”

“Oh, love” I sighed, hugging her. “She won't. She has a little brother to meet yet”

“Oh… God, I forgot,” she whispered, her voice cracking as she leaned into me, one hand cradling her belly.

“It's understandable, Dafne” I whisper. “You are exhausted, many emotions today”

“Yeah, but…” she whispered, sighing and hugging me.

“Come on” I sighed, getting up and holding her hand.

I guided her to her room, and when I walked it her perfume immediately hit me, making me smile and close my eyes.

I'm home. With her. 

“See? She's in her bed already” I whisper looking at Athena, laying on the little couch Dafne has in her bedroom. “She wanted attention”

“Your attention” Dafne smiled weakly.

“Of course, I have to look after my girls, don’t I?” I teased gently, trying to lift the mood.

“Sure” she smiled, hugging me.

I chuckled, kissing her forehead, then the tip of her nose, her cheeks, her jaw and finally her lips. I could feel her smile against my lips, making me sigh happily. 

“Let's get in bed” I whisper against her lips.

She smiled and nodded, kissing me again, unbuttoning my shirt, undressing me slowly. I did the same with her, pulling down the zip on her dress and taking it off, moaning softly when I felt that she wasn't wearing a bra.

“My beautiful girl” I whisper, kissing her neck and kneeling in front of her facing her belly. “And my beautiful son. My beautiful little boy. God, I love you both so much”

She placed her hand on my hair, rubbing it softly, making me close my eyes and press soft kisses on her belly. 

And then she said it, the three words I’d been longing to hear, words that had echoed in every dream.

“I love you, Charles.”

taglist

@racinggirl @elisysd @alltoomaples @ssprayberrythings @rach3164 @yvonne-dump @deliciousfestsalad @janeh22 @hc-dutch @ninifee1802 @kakorrhaphiphobia @ssararuffoni @itsjustkhaos @scaramou @tapedeck-hearts @sltwins @glitterquadricorn @ladystardust05 @theseerbetweenus @vizzzashley @auawdo @leah-also-known-as-creatoronwp @leptitlu @green-thots @caterinemirandax_ @mid5nights @harrysdimple05 @nofingjustaninchident

[tiredmamaissy]

hey 👋

i think this is the longest i've been gone. i missed you all a lot. i've been writing this entire time, and wanted to finish the last (for now, it’s definitely not completed) two chapters of the ralak series before officially coming back. i didn't want to come back without some sort of peace offering (lol how could i come back empty handed?) and i don’t want to leave you guys hanging again, gotta give some sort of closure to this series!

i'm almost finished, but i felt like i needed to come on here and explain myself.

i've been really struggling with my mental lately. it's just been pretty bad, to be frank. and when i get like this, i find it extremely difficult to juggle all that life entails, and will typically neglect certain aspects of it just to get by. unfortunately, this, and my social life, have taken the biggest hit. i find it hard to keep in touch regularly with friends, and i end up just retreating into my shell. motivation becomes little, or nothing at all.

i don't want to go into too much detail, but i've found myself between a rock and a hard place. i don't feel like i have many options in my current situation. i feel trapped. i suppose i've felt this way for the past few years, but it's just been pretty bad recently. issy has been an escape for me. i created a ‘new’ identity, one that i could unapologetically be myself. no face to the name type of thing. i fell in love with pandora, yearning to go there. and suddenly, my ideal world--my ideal everything was at my fingertips.

when i first started, the feeling of regaining my identity after so many years was exhilarating. i put many, many things on the back burner to immerse myself into this feeling and this world. quicker meals, shorter showers, later bedtimes. i did any and everything to dedicate as much time as i could muster up to hold onto this new identity. i could feel myself becoming happier, slipping back into who i was before i lost her.

but life just happens. you know? it continued, and it did so ten-fold. it was one thing after the next, and soon my plate was so full that i had to take something off of it. i guess i'm used to choosing myself to neglect first, so i told myself i'd put this off until i could get through this and then come back. so i did, and i came back. then life happened again. so i left, and came back.

but this time around life hit me hard. i felt like i was playing a game on the hardest difficulty, with a half a life, no pauses, and no way to exit safely. i'm still playing that game, but i've realised that i should really try to make the most of it. so i've been writing in what time i have. it's been one of my biggest escapes and it makes me happy that i can share it, and see that others enjoy what my silly brain comes up with.

i'm ready to come back, but i'm honestly still really overwhelmed with life. i really, really don't want to disappoint anyone…and i can't promise that i won't leave again anytime soon. i never want to leave. and honestly, i don't think i'll ever really leave for good. i will forever love avatar, and all that it’s done for me for the past 14 years. i guess i’m just trying to say… thank you all for your patience and love.

okidoki, let me stop here while i can lol.

ill be posting the chapters as soon as i'm done with them, ofc. i love you guys!! i’m heading to bed and will try to clear out my inbox and dm’s asap

-issy 💜

[room-surprise]

Hey! Fun question, how do you think an in-canon kabumisu confession would go? People keep portraying mithrun as blunt and straightforward about their relationship, but would he be scared to tell kabru in the chance that he'd say no and leave? Is the desire to just be in a relationship with kabru, or is the desire of not wanting to scare him off greater than that? I'm so starved on the lack of post-canon kabumisu content, they make me go crazy

As usual, I'll try not to go into TOO much detail because then I won't be motivated to write fic about it... and I AM planning to write a post-canon Kabumisu fic anon, so don't worry. I'll get there eventually :3

They make me go crazy too 😔

I think Mithrun's a complicated guy with complicated emotions. Even when he was "empty" in the dungeon he actually showed a lot of feelings - smug satisfaction, annoyance, anger, even a little bit of subtle happiness.

So while I DO think he will still be blunt in general, I also think it's a mistake to assume that means he doesn't feel things and won't have anxieties and insecurities just like any other person.

Mithrun used to be WILDLY insecure, and jealous, and paranoid. He just stopped caring about anything, but if, like the end of the manga suggests, he is going to try to START caring again, he will then start to have feelings, too.

I think Mithrun is intensely aware of his own "undesirability", that's one of the reasons he's BEEN so depressed. Most of his self-worth before the dungeon hinged on being "better" than his brother, and better than other people. Then he looses that (or maybe he was never actually better at all!), so what does he have left? And now his youth is gone too, he's middle-aged and lost his "best years" to depression. He's disabled, he's scarred, he's a bastard that nobody wants.

It's a pretty huge fall from "most eligible bachelor in the empire"!

So I think no, he won't just bluntly tell Kabru that he likes him. It will take Mithrun awhile to realize how he feels, and once he does, he'll be afraid to reach out, so he's going to do what I call "playing silly little elf games". He's going to try and flirt via writing letters and sending gifts, to hint that he likes Kabru.

Luckily for Mithrun, Kabru also knows how to play Silly Little Elf Games (he's an Olympic champion), so he picks up the signals and starts reciprocating, though he's also uncertain and worried that he's misunderstanding. Captain Mithrun couldn't be flirting with him, could he? But... what if he is?

(I will go into Kabru's feelings at a later date anon i promise.)

I think the thing that will ultimately push Mithrun to act is the fear that he'll miss his chance. Mithrun realizes Kabru is a limited time deal that he can only enjoy for the next 60-something years, and he wants every minute of that time for himself, no matter how much it will someday hurt to lose Kabru.

And he also knows that Kabru is very handsome and charming, and he can't expect Kabru to wait for Mithrun to get himself figured out. Someone else will swoop in and snatch that man up, so Mithrun has to hurry.

ALL OF THAT SAID... I think their confession is a lot less of a confession, and much more "we have both been picking up these signals of interest for months/years, and finally one of us pushes it a little bit further than we've ever pushed it before and we acknowledge the unspoken thing that has been growing between us."

Maybe it's a hand resting on someone's leg, or a gentle touch on the arm. Maybe it's leaning in so their shoulders touch. Maybe it's looking into each other's eyes a little bit longer than normal.

Probably it involves both of them admitting "Spending time with you makes me happier than anything else in the world. Whenever we're apart all I think about is when I'm going to see you again. I spend hours composing letters to you in my mind. I want us to spend our days together, no matter what shape that takes."

It's very vulnerable and scary for both of them, and I think they're both DEEPLY relieved after they finally get it out, and they don't get rejected. They know each other so well, and they're so good at reading people - they both thought that the other might feel the same way, but it's so scary to take that leap of faith and hope that they're right.

And just for the record, I think that Kabru worries about if Mithrun will be interested in sex or not, because sex is something that matters to Kabru, but what if Mithrun just doesn't have any desire for it?

And so before they get into a relationship Kabru has a long hard think about it, and decides that even if they never have sex, he wants to be in a romantic relationship with Mithrun anyway, because just being around him makes him feel happy, and understood, and like he isn't alone anymore. There's someone who sees him as he is, all the good and the bad, and says "I love you anyway."

And Kabru decides that he's willing to just jerk off for the rest of his life if that's the price of this relationship that he wants.

Luckily for Kabru, I think Mithrun does want to have sex with him, but I like to think that Kabru thinks through all the possibilities and decides that no matter what they end up doing together, being with Mithrun is worth it.

[flowerandblood]

ONE YEAR OF FLOWER&BLOOD

✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙✨🎉🌙

Exactly one year ago I posted my first chapter of the My Best Friend series. Nowadays I think it's something awful and I don't even try to edit it because I'd have to write everything from scratch, but I've left it for people who feel attached to the story. I remember getting about six likes and one comment on the first day and that huuuuge interest made me eager to create chapter 2 and then all the others.

I remember the excitement with which I waited and then replied to comments, not believing that people were actually waiting for the next chapter. At the time I was literally not following anyone, which was good because I wasn't comparing myself to anyone.

Eventually I felt I was ready to try writing other series and a few were successful enough that I decided to stay here permanently and create because it made me happy. Up to that point, everyone had been very kind to me and I started following more and more blogs, wanting to feel part of the fandom, to make friends with everyone. Now I know that was the biggest mistake I made.

Seeing things that didn't interest me, fanfic's whose way of writing couldn't draw me in, I felt frustrated, while at the same time fearing that if I stopped following someone, that person would see it as an affront. At the same time, The Impossible Choice, my biggest project until The Fall from the Heavens (which I'm currently editing and re-editing, while inserting on AO3), began to be written.

Just when I thought I had reached the pinnacle of my abilities (which wasn't true), I also started to clash with anonymous hate messages, probably the worst of which were those vilifying me and my husband, and those regarding my one-shot with Micheal Gavey. I know now that taking it personally and getting involved was my big mistake, and the fandom was shaken by drama that got out of hand.

I was a few steps away from deleting my blog at the time, but my husband talked me out of the idea (thankfully, as my stories aren't saved anywhere else − I'm only now moving them to AO3).

That's when I first realised that some people here I don't even like, and they probably don't like me. I wondered, why are we following each other then? Why are we pretending to have any courtesy? It was only later that I realised that to be considered someone's friend, you have to reblog their work and preferably agree with them even when they write hurtful things.

Since I've depleted my circle of those I follow to about 20 people, since I've blocked dozens of people and tags, there's been blissful silence (with the exceptions of when I write about behaviour in the fandom that I find toxic and someone accuses me of causing drama, but I'm used to it now). I've also never written happier than I do now.

Ideas come to me on their own, I don't feel uptight about what other big people will think of me, whether they reblog it, approve of it or not. I don't give a shit and life is beautiful! Although I can be emotionally unstable, I'm only 70 people short of crossing the next milestone of 3,000 followers, and that's BIG for me. It amuses me that I keep getting messages that someone is going to block me or stop following me, and you guys keep coming. It's gratifying.

I'm going to keep writing for you guys, and I'm sure during season two you'll also see my posts describing my impressions after the episodes in which I hope to involve my husband. I'll also keep you updated here on how I'm doing with my book I'm creating in my private life.

Apreciation

@ewanmitchellcrumbs

Ange. I know that sometimes I'm fucked up, but I want you to know that you've made this place so much more bearable for me that I can't imagine it without you. What I appreciate most about you is that you can talk and discuss, that you always try to understand the other side, that you are empathetic, warm and kind. I feel that, like friends in everyday life, we can also tell each other about things we disagree about, and there are not many people like that here.

On top of that, you are very talented and your stories are always a pleasure to read, even when they are short, you are able to build the plot and atmosphere perfectly, something I have always admired. Thank you for every kind word and understanding.

I still remember your first message to me via ask, referring to the fact that I didn't want to write a pairing with a mermaid because someone else was writing about it at the same time. My heart melted then, it was so nice!

@targaryenrealnessdarling

Liz, Queen of Angst! Your calmness and composure puts me in awe. You're disgustingly talented when it comes to writing and you have a super-sweet personality. When you started following me I began to squirm with delight, and when you started reblogging my stuff? My goodness!!!

@persephonerinyes

You've been engaging and reblogging my stories for as long as I can remember. Always involved, your thoughts make me smile. Thank you for being with me for so long!

@zenka96

You've been here with me since the dawn of time. You know that I love you. Your support from the very beginning really makes me feel like I have a friend here.

@huramuna

I am so proud of you! I remember your asks when I wrote Glass Cuts Deepest, your illustrations for me and your uncertainty about whether you should start writing yourself. I'm so happy for you and that you are so successful! You deserved it.

@black-dread & @aegonx

You are my favourite gif makers. Your work always leaves me in awe, you are amazing! I know how much work you put into it and somehow you make even the worst lit scenes look wonderful!

@summerposie; @0eessirk8; @melsunshine; @immyowndefender; @bellaisasleep; @kckt88; @thedamewithabook; @happinessinthebeing; @queenofshinigamis; @travelingmypassion; @mefools; @fan-goddess; @toodlesxcuddles; @ammo23; @troublesomesnitch; @mariahossain; @out-of-life; @apothe-roses; @heavenhatesme; @whitearemydarkestnight; @liv-cole; @blackswxnn; @echos-muses; @watercolorskyy; @at-a-rax-ia; @tssf-imagines; @snh96; @hiatuswhore; @exitpursuedbyavulcan; @darylandbethfanforever9; @the-dendrophile-bookdragon; @opheliaas-stuff @zaldritzosrose

Your comments and reblogs make me want to keep writing. You make me laugh, you comfort me and you support me. I know I'm definitely forgetting someone, but I want you to know that I love everyone who comments on my stories and there is nothing better for me than responding to your reactions and questions! I have known some of you for so many months that I truly consider you my good friends!

lottie-blue-star; aveatquevale-; aemondtargaryenwifey marvelescvpe; alphard-hydraes-blog; herejusttostan; li0nn3stuff; alexandrawho; vilmakamunen; angelinap09; theloveablestargirl; rose-blue-19; xxxkat3xxx; flosaureum; mandiiblanche; librawh0re; jasminecosmic99; ivvypg; rojocarnation; killmanduh; tokkiiidoll; wolfdressedinlace; angelofvivianne; nina2697; starwarsgirlsimmer1; katsucker; ipostwhtifeel; aemondsdelight; ilswemoon; tigrigri; pasta-rask; roselibrary; lystargs; gemini-mama; nikstrange; tempo-rary-fix; coffeeobsessedtrencher; gwuinivyre; dreamerbythewayx; diiickbrainn; mothmankit

And everyone else I missed and whose icons I would recognize from afar. I know that you have been with me for many months, often in silence or communicating anonymously. Your silent support and presence is something wonderful for me, knowing that you have been with me for so long and read all my posts!

Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!

[baohanhanesel]

Hi I love your stories with Valeria.....and I have an idea (if you don't like it it's fine).

Fem reader x Valeria

You work for Valeria, you always take hard tasks bc she knows you can do it so one day she takes you to restaurant (or something like a bar where all the dealers hang out) to be her pretty thing...but also bc she's falling for you really hard. You sit on a couch, drink ,talk and out of nowhere she tells you to sit on her lap and you do bc guess what you have a crush on her (I mean look at her...). Valeria loves to tease so you get some touches from her and maybe some compliments. A lot of sexual tension and Val being her bossy self.

I hope you understand 😆 I'll be so happy to read this if you decide to write it. Thank you 🖤

Hello Anon 👋

Happy to have received your ask! Let me try and indulge you, if I can. I'll give it a go, even if it might contain only a tiny bit of spice! Forgive me, as I am awful at writing sexual tension 🙏

Valeria Garza x Reader

You were just swearing to yourself in your muddy gear about the last mission your boss sent you to. So how you found yourself in an expensive black dress with shiny red lips, you didn't know.

All you remember was the hours you spent dolling yourself up for her. To catch her attention, and maybe to give her a green light.

"You deserved this." She slid a glass of wine in front of you, and sat on the couch next to you. You held the glass and raised your head to face her. She knew you liked wine, and didn't prefer heavy liquor. The fact she remembered this detail, it made you laugh.

"Sure did, ma'am." You flash a smile at her, still chuckling against the rim of the glass as you take a generous sip.

The sound of your laughter sent a chill down her spine. Seeing your smile, witnessing your sinful body in that tight dress, your all dolled up face... Valeria held her breath. You were a dangerous woman like her. Her right hand soldier. Her best bet on the field. You were like a forest fire. One that is contagious, dangerous, and breathtakingly beautiful all the same. You caught her lungs on fire, and she had to stop talking for a second to get a hold of herself.

"So what about the dealers?" You asked, seeing Valeria won't be doing anything but to stare at your dress unashamedly.

"Dealers?" She wet her lips, and cleared her throat. "Dealers." She looked away from you, and took a drink for herself as well. She was helping herself to a tequila, a much more confident choice.

She looked out of her head, and the reason for that was obvious in your head. It was the sight of you, and you couldn't have felt even more prideful after realizing that.

"You were the one asking me to accompany you to dinner."

"Yes, to show face."

"To the dealers?"

"A los distribuidores." (To the dealers.)

You sighed, taking another sip from your glass of wine and throwing your one leg on your other. You leaned your chest down on the table, smiling at your boss who is having a hard time because of you.

She takes a look at you again, shamelessly. She looks you up and down. She couldn't have been happier to have asked you out to dinner. In the field, you are beautiful. But in this bar, in a much calmer setting you are more than just beautiful. You are hers. And the thought of it riles her.

You are here because you took her offer. She had asked you to accompany her and get dolled up. And you had done exactly that. Her actions were subtle, but she knew that you didn't lack the intelligence to pick on them.

She was trying to flirt with you, have you to herself in a much calmer setting. And judging from the way you sit and lean forward, you did more than picking on the hints. You were using them. You were trying to give her the green light.

She must have caught the hint because she looked far more sure of her next words.

"You are beautiful tonight, mi corazon," She leaned back on her seat and looked into your eyes. "I just wanted them to see the pretty thing I am hiding."

You quirked an eyebrow,

"You are using me as a mistress, ma'am?"

Valeria smiled at your words. She wished.

"You are not doing a very great job at that boss."

She laughed at your words, and fixed you with a serious expression.

"Valeria, amore. We are not at work. I didn't take you out as your boss."

"You've been acting like I belong to you." And the words falling from your lips makes both your heart and hers skip a beat. "I don't belong to Valeria. I belong to El Sin Nombre." You were meant to tease her, and maybe get a raise or two. You didn't mean any harm with your words, but judging from Valeria's expression she took offense to that.

"Amore," She leaned back, and opened her one arm slowly. She placed it on the back of the couch you were sitting on and looked straight into your eyes. She didn't break eye contact, and boy wasn't it intense. You swore you felt your soul actually leaving your body for a second.

"You are mine in every sense of the word. You know it better than I,"

"I don't seem like it."

"What?" She furrowed her eyebrows, actually growing frustrated with you. You were teasing her but wasn't she annoyed with it. You were giving her the green light and tempting her at the same time. You wanted to get into trouble, she could say that much.

"I don't seem like I belong to you."

"We can't have that, can we?" She sighed, and spread her legs open slowly. Her one hand placed right on her left thigh and landed a pat.

Your eyes widened, and all of the blood in your body rushed to your face.

The offer was there. And you'd be a fool to not have taken it. If you knew Valeria, she wouldn't voice it out loud. So you took the offer, as fast as humanly possible.

You were up on your feet embarrassingly fast. You sat down on her lap, one arm around her shoulders and your both legs hesitantly sat on her lap. You weren't leaning your entire body on her.

"Mi vida, sit down."

"I am." You couldn't even make eye contact, in fear of being too close despite being desperate to sit on her lap in the first place.

"You are not. Sit down."

The authoritative tone in her voice made you shiver. Valeria was more than capable of holding you, but at this moment you found it hard to lean into her.

Valeria placed her hand on the little of your back, and slowly slid it to your waist. She grabbed you, and encouraged you to sink yourself down on her.

You felt your skin burn where she touched you on the dress. Wishing that the piece of black cloth hadn't been in the way. You stopped your thoughts from getting out of control and let your body go.

You were seated completely on her lap. With her one hand on your waist and the other resting on your lap.

"See, much better." She seemed prideful, with you seated on her lap. "Do you seem like you belong to me now?"

You nodded abruptly, and looked into her eyes only to see she was already looking at you.

She was right, you belonged to her. Your life belonged to her, your mind belonged to her and your heart, painful as it was, belonged to her.

Just like how hers belonged to you.

[grandlinedreams]

I know i request alot but i love your writing smmm

Do u mind if u r comie with writing law’s reaction if he thought his girlfriend was cheating on him?like his reaction and if he confronts or not

Emphasize on thought (she didn't cheat he misunderstood)

Stay safe aurhor chan 🖤

Hiya bb, no worries!! I'm glad that you like my writing!! And you stay safe too!! But I also hope this is to your liking!!

[Heads up!: mention of hypothetical infidelity but isn't really abt that, Law is just an anxious babe, insecurity, a lil angst, afab!reader]

"Are you excited about going home?"

You shrug, trying to play off the rise of nervouse excitement that swells in your chest as you answer Penguin. "A little, it's been ages so I'm not sure anyone's going to remember me."

"I'm sure they will," Penguin reassures you and you beam, though it dims a little as you're abruptly reminded of someone who had not shared your enthusiasm about stopping for supplies at your home island.

Law is never particularly enthusiastic about anything, but the soft smile he'd worn at the start of your excited ramble about where Bepo said you were heading had disappeared at a record rate. By the time you were done, his answers had gone to a measure of about two words if you were lucky, and you'd finally given up, heart sinking.

You don't know what the problem is. It's not as though you're planning on leaving the Heart Pirates, planning on leaving him ㅡ you would never. Though you've missed the comforts that always come with the thoughts of home, you're not about to abandon the home that you have now.

ㅡ

Law is afraid that you'll leave.

He doesn't know where the fear has come from given that it's baseless, but the enthusiasm and soft-expressioned way you describe your home island only furthers that creeping feeling until he's trying hard not to think about.

And truth be told, he wouldn't blame you if you did. Being a pirate is dangerous, especially when the bounty only continues to grow ㅡ and though he absolutely tries, he knows he can't promise your safety all the time.

You deserve stability and safety, a future that you can look to and find strong foundation in. You deserve more than what he can give you.

And though it hurts to think about the idea of losing you, Law tells himself that he'll support your decision, no matter what it may be.

ㅡ

To your surprise, there's more than a few people who recognize you, waving and offering greetings.

"Look at you, a genuine pirate now!"

"Staying out of trouble, right? Don't wanna see that pretty face on a Wanted poster!"

Law watches the way you interact with them and chastises himself for getting too into his worries of you wanting to stay here. It's clear that you miss it, but you never stray far from the small group that you've lead to gather supplies.

That is until there's a call of your name and Law looks over to find it to be an unfamilar man, perhaps a year or two younger than himself. He opens his arms, and jealousy rears its ugly green head in Law's chest when you dart forward to throw yourself into him.

He spins you, earning a shriek of delight from you before he sets you down. What he says next is inaudible, but he talks for several moments before your expression shifts to an unreadable one.

"Hey guys," you call, "canㅡcan you finish up without me? I'll meet you in a little bit, I just need to go do something."

There's varying murmurs of agreement, but something ugly blossoms in Law's stomach at the way your hand curls around the newcomer's.

ㅡ

When sunset rolls around and you still haven't come back to the Polar Tang, the ugly thing has curled claws deep into him and sewn its seeds of dissent.

Law knows you would never cheat on him, he knows ㅡ but the familiarity with which you'd treated the other man makes him wonder if you'd be happier with him rather than Law.

Again, if you'd be happier here.

Staring out at the town, it takes him a minute to register that the form growing closer is you, heart giving an uneasy lurch when he sees you lift an arm to your face. Had that other man hurt you?

A quiet "shambles" has him just a few feet from you now and you jolt, startled. "Law?"

"You've been crying," Law points out instead, the tear tracks that glisten on your cheeks. "Did that guyㅡ"

"He didn't do anything," you say, sweeping a hand over both your eyes to rid yourself of remnants. "He went with me to see my parents' graves. He's pretty much been my big brother since I was little, so he said he told everyone else that he wanted to be the one to tell me they'd passed."

Oh.

Law feels awful. He'd been worrying about you cheating on him, leaving him ㅡ and you hadn't been doing either. How could he think so little of you?

He steps closer, tugging you into his arms, heart aching at the muffled hiccup. He doesn't need to ask if you're okay when you're clearly not ㅡ and he feels even worse for the brief flare of satisfaction that you cling to him, fingers curled into his jacket.

"Sorry for worrying you," you mumble softly, "Should've come back sooner."

"Don't apologize." He pauses. "...it's me who should be doing that." When you pull away to look up at him, he looks away. "...I was worried you'd want to stay here. It's safer here, and you could find someone to give you what you deserve. Things I don't know if I can."

You stare blankly as you register his words, and he absolutely loathes the renewed shine of tears in your eyes. "Leave the Heart Pirates? The Polar Tang? You? Trafalgar Law, I would never."

He flinches at the usage of his full name, watching as you sniffle. "You owe me for making me cry again, idiot."

The uneasy tension in his chest starts to let up. "I do," he says. "I'll do anything you want me to."

You take the half-step needed to press your face back into his chest, your voice mumbled. "Can you shambles us back onto the ship? I'm tired and I wanna go home. My real home."

Relief floods his veins at your reassurance that you aren't going anywhere anytime soon, that he has nothing to worry about. That you're his as much as he's yours.

"Yeah," he answers. "Let's go home."

[ntcresswell]

Body swap au

wonka x reader story, where Wonka and Noodle swap bodies and reader accidentally confessed her feelings to Wonka thinking it's Noodle

Okay, disclaimer: this is my first time writing in YEARS and also I hope no one wrote this au about wonka before or I'll feel stupid. literally created this acc just for this. anyway, enjoy!!

One day, Willy Wonka was pacing around his office, his mind racing with thoughts about new recipes, when he got a sudden idea.

"Hey, Noodle! Remember the other day when you said you wished you could grow faster?" he asked, his eyes bright with excitement.

"Yeah, I do. What about it?" Noodle replied, her curiosity piqued.

"Well, I've been thinking... what if I created a new type of chocolate... one that could make you taller?" he said, a mischievous grin spreading across his face.

Noodle's eyes widened with interest. This isn’t exactly what she wanted, but perhaps if she was a bit taller people would treat her as an adult. She watched as Willy quickly jumped up from his chair and grabbed a pad of paper and a pen. For the next hour, he worked out the details of his idea - the ingredients he would need, and how he would construct the recipe. She liked seeing the excitement in his eyes every time he had a new crazy idea for a chocolate and she liked that he was trying to make her and everyone else happier with it.

Noodle watched as he diligently worked on his travel factory, sometimes randomly saying "huh!". She could see the hours ticking by, with Willy completely absorbed in his task.

At last, Willy finished his work and turned to her with a new piece of chocolate in his hand. He looked over at Noodle, a proud expression on his face. "I think I've got it! It might just work."

Noodle was amazed by the sight of the finished chocolate. It was a work of art, with intriguing designs and weird ingredients. She couldn't believe that Willy had actually done it.

"I'm not sure if this will work, but it's worth a try," Willy said, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

"It's okay. Besides, what's the worst that could happen?" She smiled watching him break the chocolate in half, so he and Noodle could share the broken pieces. They eat it at the same time, chewing slowly and enjoying the taste of Wonka's chocolate.

Willy and Noodle are filled with excitement as they sit and wait for the magic of his chocolate to take effect. They both stare at each other, waiting for the first sign of a change. But as the minutes pass, nothing happens. Willy's shoulders sag as he realizes that his plan has failed.

"It's okay, at least you tried," she says, trying to cheer him up after seeing the disappointment on his face.

Willy nods, but his mind is already racing with what he can do differently. He starts pacing around the room, lost in thought. Suddenly, Willy feels a wave of dizziness wash over him, and his vision begins to blur. He reaches out to steady himself. He looks over at Noodle, who is just as surprised as he is. Once her vision started coming back, her head still pounding, she could feel that something wasn’t right. Her entire body felt different and she could see the room from a new perspective. A higher perspective, to be precise. She was sure that just a moment ago she was sitting on Willy's bed, but now she found herself standing in the middle of the room. Noodle's mind is filled with joy and excitement as she realises that Willy did it after all and she is taller than she ever thought she could be. Then her eyes shift to where the man was standing and instead, she sees another face looking back at her. Her face. Suddenly, the realisation hits her like a ton of bricks. She looks down at herself, and instead of her own body, she sees Willy's. She stares at herself in disbelief, unable to understand what has just happened.

"What did just..." she tries to speak, but the sound that comes out is Willy's voice. Her breath catches in her throat, and she can feel her heart pounding in her chest.

For a moment, she just stands there, frozen in shock. Then, the whole situation sinks in. She is now Willy Wonka, the world-famous chocolatier. With a shaking hand, she reaches up to touch her face, feeling Willy's stubble against her skin.

Willy's eyes sparkle with excitement as he looks over at Noodle, understanding what he has just accomplished. He can hardly contain himself as he walks around the room, muttering to himself about his brilliance and the amazing thing he's created. His eyes land on Noodle again and he realises that she's staring at him in disbelief. He takes a deep breath and attempts to compose himself, changing his demeanour to that of a serious expert.

“Don’t worry, the effect should end in a few hours at maximum and we’ll be back to normal.” He tells her and smiles again, “And you got your wish after all, huh?”

After a few awkward seconds of silence, they both burst out laughing, realising just how ridiculous the situation they found themselves in is. It's not every day that you switch bodies with your best friend, after all.

“Yeah, I guess I am an adult now. And also a man” she said still laughing.

Willy and Noodle have the time of their lives, watching themselves from a new point of view. They dance, make funny faces, and do silly actions that they never would have had the courage to do in their own bodies. The two of them are laughing and having so much fun together, they are completely lost in the moment.

After a while, Noodle starts to feel tired and tells Willy that she needs to go to bed. Willy says goodnight and she leaves the room, heading to her bed. Before she falls asleep, she can't help but smile to herself, remembering the fun they had together. She closes her eyes, hoping that she'll wake up in the morning back in her own body.

***

Y/n was laying in bed, staring at the ceiling. Her thoughts were filled with Willy Wonka, the chocolatier she met not long ago. They grew close in such a short time and he had the ability to make her happy by just being there. Her mind was filled with doubts and questions, and she knew soon they would be free from working for Mrs Scrubbit so their paths would separate. She wasn't ready to let Willy go, but she was too scared to tell how she felt about him. Finally, she came to a decision: if not now, then never.

She knocks on Willy’s door, feeling nervous. Her heart is racing and she’s not sure anymore if she’s actually ready to confess her feelings to him. But she’s already here so there’s no going back. With how quickly he sales his chocolate this might be her last chance to talk to him like this. As she waits for Willy to answer the door, she is surprised to see Noodle instead. Noodle looks confused as well wanting to ask if something has happened when Y/n starts talking first.

"Oh, it's just you," she said, relieved to see that Willy isn’t here. She’s still nervous and doesn’t even think about why Noodle is alone in his room that late.

"What do you mean, just me?" Willy replied, looking at her with confusion. He had forgotten that he was in Noodle's body and that she didn't know about this yet

"I'm sorry, I thought you were Willy," Y/n says.

Willy’s expression changes to one of concern. "Is everything alright?" he asks letting Y/n walk into the room and closing the door behind her. He watches as she relaxes thinking it’s just her and Noodle in the room. The two of them have known each other for about a year and Y/n feels a sense of responsibility for the kid. That's why she was so happy when Willy appeared in their lives and made Noodle feel like she had an older brother who cared about her. She loves watching the two of them having fun together and feels grateful to Willy for the happiness he brings to Noodle.

“Yeah, no, I just...” Y/n takes a deep breath, trying to gather the courage to say what she's been feeling. She can barely contain her nervousness as she paces around the room, spilling her thoughts to ‘Noodle’. “You know how I feel about Willy. And it keeps me awake at night. I know you said I should tell him the truth, but I’m too scared, how can you even imagine it?”

“Y/n, I don’t think it’s a good moment...” Willy tries to interrupt, but she's not having it. She's deep in her thoughts and can't seem to stop talking. She keeps pacing around the room without looking at him.

“Like am I supposed to just walk into his room and say ‘Oh hey, Willy, you know I think I’m deeply in love with you and want to spend the rest of my life by your side’?” She looks over at Noodle who is clearly shocked by what she just heard. "Noodle? You alright?" Y/n asks, concerned by the look on Noodle's face.

Willy finally gathers his senses and speaks up. "Oh, umm, yeah... I just... um," he whispers.

“You’re acting weird today. Did anything happened?” Y/n investigates her face not understanding what is wrong.

Willy stood in shock before her, trying to think of what to say and how to explain everything, but the racing of his heart and the happiness he felt were too distracting. Y/n had just confessed her feelings for him. The girl he was attracted to since their first meeting. She’s kind, brave, and always there for her friends. She's a constant source of comfort and support, and he can't imagine his life without her. All this time he kept quiet about his feelings, fearing that they might not be shared. He didn’t want to make things awkward between them or risk their friendship.

Suddenly, they heard a knock on the door, and the actual Noodle, who was still in Willy's body, walked into the room. Y/n stiffened up, trying to put on a casual appearance as she looked at the man in front of her. Willy could see now the way she was staring at him, as if he were the only thing in the universe for her. The real Noodle, still in his body, just stood there, trying to figure out what was going on.

"Y/n, there you are! I wanted to show you what Willy did with his chocolate this time before the magic wears off!" Noodle practically skipped over to her with excitement, forgetting that she was in Willy's body and lightly bumping her head with the chandelier.

Y/n looked at her with confusion. "What do you mean?"

Noodle pointed to her entire body with a proud expression. "It's me, Noodle! Willy wanted to make me taller, but accidentally made us swap bodies. Isn't that cool? He can even do something like this!" She turned to face her friend, who now looked like she’d seen a ghost. Or something even worse. Willy's face looked worried and apologetic as Y/n turned to look at him.

"Tell me you're joking," she said in a hushed voice.

“Listen, I tried to sa-“ Willy's voice was suddenly cut short as the room started spinning, the dizziness returning to his head. He tried to steady himself and finish his sentence, but it was impossible. He looked over at Noodle, who was holding onto her head looking at him understanding what’s about to happen. Y/n looked at both of them with worry and confusion, but before she could realise what had just happened – they were back to normal.

Noodle was beaming with happiness as she saw her reflection in the mirror. "I'm me again!" she exclaimed, not realizing the tension in the room. "Oh, it feels good to be me. Sorry, Willy, nothing personal," She said, continuing to ramble on without noticing the silence in the room.

“Noodle, give us a few minutes alone. Please” Willy's voice was soft, but firm, and she turned to see him still staring at Y/n who’s turned all pale looking back at him.

Noodle nods, completely oblivious to the gravity of the situation. "Sure thing!" she says, heading out of the room. Y/n watches as the door closes behind her friend and turns to Willy with a look of shock on her face. "Mind explaining what just happened?" she asks, her voice shaking slightly.

Willy takes a deep breath before answering. "Well, you see... I was experimenting with a new chocolate and uh... Noodle and I swapped bodies," he says, trying to keep his voice calm.

She stood there in shock, trying to process the information. All she could muster was a quiet "Oh." Willy took a deep breath before answering. "Yeah," he said softly. "About what you said earlier..."

"It was a joke," she said quickly. Willy could see the nervousness in her eyes as they darted around the room, trying to avoid his gaze. “Just a joke. Yes. Please forget it, I was just...”

"I love you too," Willy said with a soft smile on his face. She finally met his gaze and said a simple “Oh.” as an answer. “Yeah.” Is all he said before he leaned in and kissed her, feeling a sense of joy and relief washing over him. It was like all the pieces of his life had finally fallen into place, and he wouldn't trade this feeling for anything in the world.

[blasphemous-lies-and-deceit]

8. "You should eat something" GerryMichael? Your writing is incredibly nice to read through, thank you for taking time out of your day to write and post so many cool fics! Take care of yourself <3

"You should eat something."

"Can't," Michael answered bruskly, turning on his heel to pace the other direction. "My stomach's in knots. I'll probably just get sick on him."

"Bet that won't be the worst thing Bouchard's gotten on him," Gerry tried to joke, but Michael just whined and kept pacing. It was one thing to virulantly hate his boss and fantasize about killing him from a distance, but he was terribly anxious about being face to face and alone with him. Usually it was Gertrude's job to give the Head of the Institute a report about the Archive's activities, but she was off in America and sending very sparce updates, and left him behind to deal with Elias. He'd been dreading their scheduled meeting for days, and would continue to dread for the next twenty-five minutes until it was finally time to face him. He didn't know if he wanted the time to pass faster or slower, so he could get it over already, or keep from ever having to see him. It was awful.

Gerry caught his hand as Michael swung by again, pulling him gently down into the seat opposite him. "Eat," he ordered, holding a fruity granola bar to Michael's lips. "Please." Michael obliged him, leaning forward to take a bite and giving him a sassy eyebrow raise.

"Happy?"

"Not in the slightest," Gerry sighed, his free hand came to rest on Michael's jittering knee, squeezing and rubbing it soothingly. "I'd be much happier if I went with you, or you didn't have to do this at all."

"Same." Michael took another bite, forcing his dry throat to swallow the mouthful of grains and fake fruit. He did want Gerry with him, but there was no way they could get away with it, since Gerry wasn't an employee, and could barely considered a freelancer for the Institute. "He's probably up in his office getting off on how anxious and worried we are."

Gerry's face screwed up in exaggerated disgusted agony. "Please don't ever mention Elias and getting off in the same sentence again," he groaned theatrically.

Despite his worries, Michael managed to smile at his reaction. "If Gertrude is right, and he is connected to the Eye like we are, he'll probably notice if I try to imagine him in his underwear too," he giggled.

"That's horrific," Gerry snapped mildly, peeling away the remaining wrapper of the bar. "That's the worst image you've ever put in my head. How dare you."

"If I have to suffer then so do you." Michael took the last bite and leaned forward in his seat, inclining towards Gerry. Gerry leaned in as well, and they met in the middle, foreheads pressed together. Michael closed his eyes, soaking in the familiar smell of Gerry, the comfort of his presence. It was everything to him, the love he felt for Gerry, and felt in return. Enough to distract him from his dread.

"You've got this," Gerry assured him, taking his hands and entwining their fingers together. "You'll do just fine up there. It's not like you can be fired from this place."

"But he could do a lot worse than that," Michael pointed out grimly, and watched Gerry hold back a wince.

"That won't happen," Gerry swore. "You'll tell him what he wants to hear and then you'll come back here and we'll call it a day. We'll go get some sushi and eat it in our pants on your sofa and we'll forget about how stressed we've been for the past few weeks." Still holding Michael's hands, he framed his face and ducked in for a kiss, lingering and sweet. "So get up there and give that old bastard hell."

"Thanks, love," Michael sighed, taking another kiss for courage before standing up. He wrapped up Gerry in a hug for good measure, wishing he could stay there for as long as possible. Anything to avoid Elias.

"Is this drama necessary?"

Michael and Gerry sprang apart in shock. Gertrude was standing in the doorway, looking frazzled and exhausted, but she was there, and Michael could honestly say for once he was happy to see her.

"Not anymore!" he said cheerfully, smiling brilliantly. "Now you can report to Elias instead of me."

Gertrude gave him the most exhausted and unimpressed look he'd ever seen from her, and that was saying something. "I'd truly rather not," she sighed, dropping her luggage by the door. "But I do have information to impart on him, so I will accompany you."

"Wait," Gerry snapped, pulling open a drawer in the desk that he'd more or less claimed as his. He pulled out a Polaroid and considered it, silently comparing the Gertrude before them to the Gertrude on the picture. He held it to Michael to take a look, and he nodded. "You do seem to be the real Gertrude Robinson," he conceeded. "You had me worried for a moment, being so kind and considering to us."

"I'm simply overjoyed to be back," Gertrude deadpanned, the faintest hint of a smile on her lips. "You should come along as well, Gerard, I'd rather not explain this twice.

Gerry exchanged a look with Michael as they followed her out of the Archives, and Michael took his hand to squeeze it. Her return didn't solve all of their problems, and came with its own anxieties, but at least he wouldn't have to face Elias alone now.

[americas-ass-writing]

Invisible

Steve Rogers x avenger!reader (-ish)

Words: 2.2k

Summary: The newest member of the avengers feels invisible. A shitty mission and social media brings her to her breaking point. See what happens when she confronts the team.

Warnings: angst, mentions of death (briefly)

A/N: not me dipping for like two years and returning. Sorry it took me so long, I'll try to write more often now. Hope you enjoy this little one shot that was caused by me feeling invisible.

Another mission successfully completed. It's your fifth mission as an Avenger and you couldn't be happier that it's over.

Two weeks, two exhausting weeks with Hydra finding their single brain cell and not being predictable this time. But it's over now, you can return home to the tower and spend time with... no one.

The Avengers were nice, they really were. Welcoming you with open arms, always striking up conversation when you were around but you couldn't miss that no one ever asked you to spend time with them besides the team activities. They didn't mean it, you're sure of that but you can't stop the pang in your heart when Wanda and Nat make shopping plans right in front of you and don't invite you. Or when Steve and Bucky plan a little day trip and think of inviting Sam to come along but not you who was sitting right next to him on the couch.

More than once the delivery person forgot your food. Steve was always nice enough to share one of his three portions with you but not even the delivery person struck you as important enough to remember your order.

You find yourself in the hallway after the debrief. Everyone was tired, exhausted and done. Your eyes flicker over the little friend groups building to walk back to the common area together. Clint who has been shot hanging off Natasha's shoulder, laughing at something she said. Sam and Bucky bickering with Steve walking between them like an over exhausted dad. Tony and Bruce talking big ideas to improve suits, weapons and the team. Wanda and Vision lost in each other, holding hands. And then there was you. Standing in the hallway, surrounded by people, watching and still feeling utterly alone. Agents flutter around you, not even giving you a glance. Sometimes you just feel so invisible... So unimportant. Like you shouldn't even be a member of this team.

Tired feet carry you to your room, you take the route that's longer but it avoids the common area. Your heart can only take so much. And all you need right now is a hot shower, your bed and mindless scrolling through social media. You're not even in the mood to eat lunch. At least not in the common room. The stash of protein bars under your bed will have to do.

So you take a long warm shower, letting the water run over your body while Taylor Swift's voice fills the room alongside the humidity that lets the mirror fog. You dry yourself, slip into comfy pyjamas and soon enough your head meets your pillow. You breathe in the scent of home and crawl under the comforter. Finally your hand reaches for your phone. You've been gone for a while, you probably missed some things. Your phone starts up slowly and some notifications come through. You have missed emails -most of them newsletters-, a few notifications of Instagram -celebrities and acquaintances posting things- and no one reaching out to you personally. Your eyes fall shut for a moment as your heart breaks a little more. You really thought you're a decent human being... Why did no one like you? Why did no one think of you?

Your thumb hovers over the Instagram icon, trying to decide if you should open the app. With a sigh you open it, a little mindless scrolling could do no harm. Right?

Wrong. Somehow you land on the official avengers account. Your eyes scanning the pictures. There has been one new post while you were gone - a picture of the team minus you. Wasn't your portrait supposed to be posted to announce you as a new member? Maybe they had to push it back... Or maybe they didn't want you on the account. Would explain why you're the one who's cropped out of the group picture. The caption mentions something about the team answering questions soon and telling people to comment what they always wanted to know. You know that Instagram comment sections are a different kind of world. One that can be really positive or just down right toxic. Yet you still click into it, curious what questions you'd find.

Some of them ask for Natasha's makeup routine, a lot ask for Steve to finally post a shirtless picture on his account, some ask why Bucky always looks so grumpy. There's genuinely nice questions asking for self defense tips or if they can come to schools to visit kids. And then there's the comments that are just plain rude, insulting about any member of the team. And then there's this one...

Cropped the new girl out already huh? Knew that ugly incompetent chick wasn't made for this team. Good riddance.

No matter how hard you tried you couldn't tear your eyes off it. Your pupils scan over the words again and again and again. Till hot tears spilled. Till you completely lost it as an ugly sob tore through you. You weren't good enough for this team, for your family, for your friends, for anyone or anything in this world. You were invisible and you always would be.

Logically you knew that keeping all of this in and being exhausted by the two week long mission was causing this break down. If you would have told someone you felt this way, things would be different. But your emotions got the better of you. Which is how you found yourself on a very determined march to the common area. Jammies on, your phone clutched in your hand, tears streaming down your hardened face. Your brain didn't even process your way here, you just suddenly found yourself in front of the avengers who were eating dinner - without you. You're met with some concerned faces but before anyone can say anything your words cut the thick air.

"I quit." You say, voice wobblier than you intended. The lump in your throat growing by the second. "What? Y/N what brought this on? I know the mission was hard but..." before a very concerned Steve could finish his sentence you cut him off. "This isn't about the fucking mission, Rogers." Your voice is full of venom. "This is about... You know what this is about this" you wave your hand around the room. Gazes turn to confusion. "And this!" You shove your phone into Steve's face, the group picture you've been cropped out of on the display.

"A picture of us? I don't... Understand..." Steve breaks the silence after a moment. "A picture of you. You guys and oh would you look at that... A little bit of my sleeve over there." You point out. "I've been cropped out." You explain further.

"Alright firecracker you know we're not responsible for the account. That's the social teams doing." Tony jumps in. "Yeah. Yeah you're right. You know what's your doing though?" You say as you retract your phone out of Steve's face. You slide it in your pocket and take a steadying breath. "Not inviting me to join activities, not telling the fucking delivery guy that maybe, just maybe there's a new member on the team after he forgot my food for the third fucking time in a row. Skipping my turn to pick a god damn movie because you all forgot to tell me you're doing an improv movie night. Walking back from a debrief in your little groups, none of you even thinking of just waiting a second so I can at least walk with someone. Oh and this. You're having dinner, the team, and who wasn't here until she stormed in? Me." You didn't realise that your voice got louder, the frustration got the better of you. "And it's not just this. No one thinks I belong here. No one in the comments of that post, not the press... Hell, even Friday still calls me recruit. If you don't want a new member on the team just say so. I'll leave. You'll never see me again. I'll turn invisible like I always feel... Like I am." you add quietly now, not even sure if anyone but you heard it. The lump in your throat is impossibly thick and finally it completed its mission and tore another sob from you. It hurts. It hurts to not belong. It hurts to be invisible. There's a short silence before the scraping of a chair on the floor fills the air. Mere seconds later you're wrapped up in strong arms, pulling you into a much needed hug. A large hand rubs your back.

"This is... We don't want you to leave. We... I never noticed we did that... You're just... It has been so long since we added a new member... This is a bullshit excuse I know. I'm sorry." Steve mumbles into your hair. His warmth seeps into your body as your tears wet his shirt. "Why didn't you tell us earlier? You know you can always come to me to talk" he adds softly after a moment. You let out a shaky breath. And another... And another, trying to find your voice after this pathetic performance. "I..." you croak out and immediately stop. Steve's hand rubs up and down your back.

"I felt the same way." The voice of Wanda pulls your face out of Steve's chest, your watery eyes finding hers. "I joined the team after my brother died. I've always been with him. I never felt alone but... Then I did. And believe me they don't do it on purpose. They have their little groups inside of this big one and they don't immediately think about including someone new. I'm sorry that I didn't think about it." She says softly. "I always felt alone in the beginning, I never got invited to go places, the press tore me apart because this random European with weird powers was suddenly a member of the earth's mightiest heroes, the social team didn't post my introduction portrait... I also wanted to quit but... then they organised a dinner with Paprikash... They made it for me because they thought I was homesick... and I realised that they do care about me. And I promise you, we do care about you. Steve made sure to tell the restaurant twice to not forget your order today." She points to the unopened container. "And when Nat wanted to get you for dinner she heard that you were showering and then we assumed you just needed some time for yourself."

Your eyes wander over the concerned faces of the team, then back to Wanda, then to the container of food, then finally to Steve. "You told them to remember my food?" You whisper. He nods immediately.

"Not because I don't like to share mine! Because I thought you'd like yours more and it happened three times already and I..." He gets cut off as you hug him back with a bit too much force. "Thank you" you whisper before you let him go and look at the team. "I'm sorry for the outburst... I... should have said something earlier but I… I felt so invisible and it's not like many people care about me in general and then I read some comments under the post and I... My brain shut off." You look down at your bare feet, not brave enough to face any of them.

"Friday? Please call Y/N firecracker from now on." Tony was the first to speak and as you looked at him in surprise he just gave you a smirk before going back to his food. Other team members give you smiles, small nods, Clint even signs that it's all good to you.

Steve's warm hand finds the small of your back and leads you to the table, to your unassigned spot right next to him. Both of you sit down and you open your food, your heart fills as you see your order. Low chatter fills the room as you eat. Wanda invites you to go shopping the next day, Sam invites you to mario kart after dinner. You feel stupid, oh so stupid. You should have just said something earlier. This all could have been avoided.

"I know why your portrait didn't get posted yet." You frown as you look at Bucky who simply smiles. "Stevie here…" his hand falls on the shoulder of his friend. Steve's eyes fill with dread, his ears turn pink. "...knows that you weren't happy with it. So he told the social team to hold off posting it until he can sketch a new portrait of you." His lips are parted in a shit eating grin. Steve is blushing madly, trying to hide it by staring at the tabletop. His fists clenching.

"You... Want to draw a portrait of me?" You ask softly, looking at the blonde next to you. After a few seconds he simply nods, his eyes still fixed on the table. "Because I didn't like the one the photographer took?" your lips pull into a small smile as he gives you another nod. "Why would you do that?" you ask softly.

"Because he has a big fat..." Bucky starts but is quickly interrupted by a death glare of his blonde friend. The former assassin gets out of his seat and proceeds to put some distance between the two super soldiers, Steve's eyes follow him with the same warning glance.

"...crush on you." Bucky finishes and immediately takes off running. Steve's chair falls to the floor as he jumps up to run after him. Your eyes follow the two of them, Bucky's snickers and Steve's curses filling the air.

Maybe... Just maybe you weren't invisible after all.

And you knew you weren't when Steve found you later that night with the sketch of you in his hand and a confession on his lips.

[lizstcore]

Helga Sinclair x fem! reader

(part 1??)

this is literally my first time writing something and posting it,and it's not too good (+, English is not my first language).And nothing much happens,sorry 😭 . I can make a part 2 tho! Also,very ooc.

` When you accepted joining a mission on discovering the lost city of Atlantis and getting a bunch of money for simply doing what you know best,you couldn't be happier. Of course,you didn't expect to actually find living atlantians in there,but that's a story for another day. Now you were busy trying to get out of an active volcano.

"Milo!" you all desperately screamed,as the linguist tried to attach a crystallized Kida to our vehicle. You turned around in a hurry, wanting to see if there was anyone left. You felt your breath get stuck in your throat at the sight of the woman who betrayed you all,the cold hearted mercenary that was willing to wipe out an entire society for some money. The woman you unfortunately fell in love with, bleeding out in the crater of an active volcano that was about to erupt.

You stopped dead in your tracks, considering your options . In a moment of desperation,you jumped out of the vehicle,despite everyone telling you to get back and drive away. You ran to Helga as quickly as you could, struggling to pick her up over her shoulders. The blonde woman looked like she was trying to say something, presumably some snarky remark,but she only managed to let out a few painful sounding coughs and whimpers

Her eyes opened and widened momentarily, her face turned from an unreadable expression into a grimace. She was visibly uncomfortable, her teeth gritting painfully and her eyes closed in pain. She gave a sharp intake of air, which triggerd a deep, harsh cough. The red blood which stained her lips made her look almost demonic as she opend her eyes again and fixated your gaze for a moment. She did not appear to recognize you at first, but then the color began to slowly return to her face.

"Get me...out of here.. I'll be fine." she mumbled , trying to avoid your gaze

You immediately panicked and rushed to your vehicle, quickly pushing Helga inside while you put on your seat belt. Even as she laid hurt and half unconscious next to you,she was still very intimidating.

A few days passed by quickly,and everything was going pretty well. You and the crew returned from the Atlantis mission with more treasures than you've ever seen before,and an incredible discovery. While the others were busy trying to forget about everything Rourke did to the entire Atlantian civilisation,you spent most of your time in the hospital with Helga.

"I got you some stuff....check this out, it's an Atlantian dress! This would look beautiful on you!" you said excitedly, showing Helga the beautiful item of clothing. She scoffed and closed her eyes.

"Not my style. How long 'till I get out of this nightmare?" she asked, clearly done with everything that has happened in the past days

"A few days, don't worry... it's a miracle how you managed to survive that fall. The doctors are super shocked about your recovery." She chuckled,which was surprisingly attractive.

"I'm a tough gal,eh?...." she chuckled,then paused, looking like she wanted to ask something. Before she could open her mouth,you interrupted her.

"Yes,Rourke is dead. Yes, you're the one that finished him off,more or less" you smiled softly as you saw the corners of her mouth turn upwards. You haven't seen her actually smile in a while,it was a beautiful sight.

"Is that so?" she mumbled softly, clearly trying not to grin but failing miserably. Yeah,no one liked Rourke. You let your hand fall by your side,not noticing Helga's hand resting against the side of the hospital bed. Your hands brushed against eachother,and your touch starved ass immediately started sweating nervously. Yet no one moved.

"I...really like you, y'know... you're very strong. Emotionally and physically." you felt the urge to compliment her,and couldn't help yourself as you saw a literal goddess in front of you.

"Thank you,little girl" she smirked, teasing you.

"Hey now, I'm only a couple years younger!"

"Mhm..."

You couldn't help but look at the way her muscles flexed against the thin material of the hospital clothes. In fact,you looked so much you forgot you were even having a conversation with her.

"Getting quite distracted,I see. Just wait until I get out of here, sweetheart" she knew how much her teasing was affecting you,yet she continued. How awfully cruel... You felt your face getting red,and ignored your heart beating faster and faster.

You kept awkwardly chatting,until...

"They hate me, don't they?" Helga blurted out suddenly,as you bit you lip. She probably won't care less,so you decided to tell her the truth.

"They haven't forgiven you for betraying us... neither have I. You're lucky I get attached too easily. They got a bunch of treasures and valuable junk from Atlantis while I was busy getting Joshua to treat you...but I can't say I regret it" her emotions visibly changed all throughout your small explanation,but she finally looked at you with some sort of appreciation. She would never admit it though.

"If I knew you'd be here to annoy me all day before that motherfucker threw me out of the air balloon,I would've thrown myself" she joked with a smirk on her face. She was still cold... alright...you could work with it. It was getting pretty late,and you felt a bit nervous about sending more time with her. Even if you wanted to.

"I'll think I'll go home... goodbye,Helga. I really hope your recovering goes well."

The second the word "goodbye" came out of your mouth,she wanted to jump off the hospital bed and push you back on the chair (or in bed with her). She wasn't used to so much loneliness,she could usually get men at her feet whenever she wanted (either wanting to kiss her,or begging for help). Even if she did prefer being alone ,not having anyone to talk to was different. Especially if that someone was you. She hated it,but she was starting to get attached.

"... goodbye. You'll come visit,yes?" she asked trying to cover her nervous tone .You chuckled. Obviously you would.

"Yes."