#neurosses

[audikatia]

TRICK OR TREAT!

Yay! Thank you!

Here is an unedited section from the next chapter of Transubstantiation, as well as a little glimpse into what my writing method is like.

&&&&&

Adam’s eyes caught on a tattooed hook crawled out over the collar of Ronan’s jacket, the complex physical machine of his shoulders as he unlocked the door to St. Agnes with all the grace of a thief.

He thought of the series of locks furiously attached to the door at the Barns, of Ronan’s nearly inaudible sigh of relief as Matthew clicked the car lock behind him, and he marveled at Ronan’s trust in locks. He thought of Ronan telling him to lock himself in his car that night he found Tad. It didn’t matter. He had found the body anyway.

-

The suffocating scent of incense and the sweet odor of prayer

-

Fingers wet with holy water, Ronan was only halfway finished his sign of the cross when he stalled.

“Adam.”

-

(More under the cut)

-

a small gold cross on a chain around his neck at the hollow of his throat

-

Ronan gave a smoker’s breath: a deep inhalation through flared nostrils, slow exhale through parted breath. It was too much, too loud in the way of sounds in church.

-

It was, Adam thought, like when he was younger and still living in the trailer park with his parents, when he would hedge at his door to his tiny bedroom and flick the lights off before flinging his tiny body onto his bed. That was back when he thought the monster was under the bed, not sitting in the recliner drinking a beer.

-

Ronan swore, “Jesus, Mary, and fuckface Joseph.”

- Adam tasted his own heartbeat

-

Because there, under the broken gaze of a sorrowing Christ, lay disquieting heaps of dead birds.

Adam thought the greatest testament to how familiar he had grown in Ronan’s home was his newfound ability to detect the many shades of Chainsaw’s mood. Before, he had always classified her and possibly all birds as expressionless or at least of only one unwavering temperament.

But he knew better now, cold realization filling his lungs as he looked at the dead crows at the altar.

Their stillness was nothing like Chainsaw’s own still, alertness when she perched on tree limbs to scare her prey. This was a stillness that promised movement was over. There was nothing left alive in them.

-

Ronan grabbed him from behind, impossibly strong arms wrapped around him. The scent of Ronan’s sweat and deodorant cut through the stifling stench of incense.

“Adam, stop! What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Chainsaw! What if it’s Chainsaw?”

“These little shits are too small to be Chainsaw. She’s at home right now with a hot dog hangover. She’s not here.”

-

His hand scrambled across Ronan’s chest blindly, fingers catching at the gaps between the buttons

-

"You shouldn’t have to see that."

-

Desperate whispers at the limits of his hearing

He felt like he was standing several paces behind himself

It (the wall? The church?) could hold him up. It owed him that much.

He shut his eyes prayerfully

burning points of life that ghost the eye

A message of violence

Like a fire on the other side of the room

&&&&&&

I hate how long it's taking me to write this chapter this entire fic, but I am still enjoying it when I do get the chances here and there to write. It's been such a bad combo of having too many jobs and too much brain fog to really get all the sentences down. So much of my draft looks like this: patches of sentences, half-formed passages, random snatches of poetic sayings that I will eventually string together into a coherent chapter.

But I really will mash it all together into a new chapter and eventually a finished fic. Eventually lol

[dickggansey]

I JUST HAVE TO SAY. you always reblog such great art and imagery — truly one of my favorite tumblr blogs! I love seeing you on my dash :D

OMG???? THANK YOU SO MUCH???? saying that is so so so sweet of you omg it means a lot to meeee <3<3<3<3 i absolutely love seeing you on my dash too!!!! aaaaa thank youuuuuu

[donkeyparalyzed]

Adam and Ronan inspired by amazing fanfic (autor @neurosses)

[thesehandsfic]

When is Chapter 2 bestie??🌚🌚

that's a great question. let's ask my editor. @neurosses when is chapter 2, bestie?

[smokeandjollyranchers]

A peek at the Pynch dolls i made for @neurosses that have finally made their way home! (Long wait fully on me) I’m glad they finally got to you!!! And that you’re a fan of Ronan’s lil face

Thanks for all the advice on Ronan’s shaved head and tricks to help me darken up Adam’s hair cuz he looked like a little angel at first and that wasn’t right at all 😂

And BOOm officially made TRC fan art. I’ve paid my tithe

[friendofcars]

tagged by @neurosses <3 <3 <3

List five things you never get tired of writing. it can be tropes, themes, characters, phrases, whatever brings you joy. then tag five people!

people looking at themselves in mirrors

alliteration

physiological references (esp. neuro, cardiovascular) because i cannot help myself

dense introspective passages, sparse dialogue

personifying environmental features/objects

unsure of who is actively writing at the moment, but anyone who wants to answer (not just for [fan]fiction but for meta, poetry, any other written endeavors), i tag you!

[frigid-arnica]

WIP Ask Game

I was tagged by @callileonn!

RULES: make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

I have a lot of WIPs so this will be a curated list.

Fanfic: Dimilix Catboy Werewolves Dimilix Slutty Jumpsuit Dimilix War Phase Omegaverse Dimilix Single Dadmitri Dimilix Reverse Billionaire Romance Dimilix R+J School Play Dimilix Only If For a Night The Swordsman Dimilix Magical Girls AU Korra of the Red Lotus

Original: The True Companions The Gift of the People

Send me an ask if you want to hear more about any of these!

Going to blanket tag anyone who’d like to do it. But special shoutout to @raedmagdon, @adamantineheart, @ezra-brainrot, @nebulia, and @neurosses. No pressure though.

[antibioware]

@neurosses THEY'RE NOT EVEN DRINKING WINE THAT TASTES OF ABANDONMENT STRAIGHT FROM THE BOTTLE... They're just shitty fantasy cops

Dude the Moderators are so comedically evil it's insane

[audikatia]

hello! i am very early in on reading transubstantiation (still in the first few chapters!) and it really just struck me how cleverly you've taken the coffee shop framing (which has its own loaded implications within the context of fanfic) and turned it on its head in introducing the string of perverse murders. i love that it's a genuine mystery with a confident sense of its own internal lore. i love how brittle your adam parrish is. i love how the setting is textured and grimy and brimming with secrets. you're awesome!

This has been sitting in my inbox for two months and I have thought about it every day with sheer excitement at such a nice comment and also mounting shame at how long it has taken me to respond lol

Thank you so much for sending this! I feel so often with fanfic and also published fiction that I can never really get what I truly want which is a combination of a compelling mystery and an engaging romantic pairing. There's either ROMANCE with a lil plot going on or there is MYSTERY and the couple sort of gets together at some point but it's ancillary at best. So I really wanted to be able to write my best approximation of what I want to read lol

And as for the coffee shop part, I really love the classic trope of "it's a cute small town where nothing bad ever happens EXCEPT FOR THAT ONE UNSOLVED MURDER" but I wanted the fanfic version of the small town setting which landed on a coffee shop

It means so much to me that you love my brittle Adam. "Brittle" is one of my main adjectives for his characterization that I refer back to when writing him to make sure I'm keeping him in line. One of my favorite lines in the books is about how Ronan recognizes the cracked lines all over Adam and I really wanted to reflect that in my own work, so thank you.

Really, thank you for this! I've been spending a stupid amount of time and energy on this and I always feel like people have forgotten about it since I don't have much time to write, so it's just really nice to get such thoughtful messages. Thank you!

[donkeyparalyzed]

The @neurosses  started a new fic and it's love again. Very inspiring love.

"For one electric second, their eyes meet, and Ronan feels completely stirred, as though he had been asleep this entire time after all. He sends up a simple, inexplicable, desperate prayer to God:

Please.

The glass shatters."

[donkeyparalyzed]

Tenderness

(a quick sketch in anticipation of a new chapter from @neurosses )

[smokeandjollyranchers]

My bestie @neurosses tagged me in the last line game, and for the first time in forever I actually DO have a WIP. Kismet

—-

Adam speaks again, before Gansey can dwell too hard, before his every thought is laid bare on his face and Adam jumps to his own conclusions. “I hear something. Or feel something. Or. I’m not sure exactly. But it’s keeping me up. Do—-“ he trails off, kaleidoscope eyes staring at Gansey in the darkness. Blue, green, brown, hazel. Hope, fear, defiance, heartbreak.

Do you want to come? Hangs heavy between them.

Gansey sits himself up in bed, a hand running through unruly hair, the other already looking for his glasses. “Am I invited?”

—-

I have been out of the writing game so long lol I don’t know who’s still spitting out words BUT @neurosses you never DONT want to share some wip and @daciafu I’ve seen you in your TLT era, are you making anything cool 👀

[smokeandjollyranchers]

Last line challenge!!

I got tagged by @snorlaxlovesme , and it’s rad cuz I’m STILL working on the Adansey one from last time. (I used to write 10k in a day what was that kid on).

“Not real.” Adam repeats. His hands disappearing for a moment, new panic beginning to spark before he feels Adam lace their fingers again and pull him back to his feet.

“Hey, Adam I—-“

“If you’re gonna apologize for that, it wasn’t even you—“

“No—- I mean I won’t I—-“ Gansey takes a deep breath, nearly back to normal. “Thank you. I mean. For not leaving me there.”

“I…” Gansey can’t see Adam, but he does feel Adam’s thumb trail his hand, like he had his pulse. “I’m not leaving you here. We’re heading out of this. Tonight. We’ll get back to Monmouth. Tomorrow we’ll tell everyone what we learned.”

“Yeah.” Gansey pauses for a moment. Adam begins to walk again, but is stopped when Gansey doesn’t follow him.

“Yeah?”

“I’m mad about everything.” Gansey admits. “But I don’t want to be.”

“I….I know.” Adam answers, after a few tense moments. “I am too. And I don’t want to be.”

Gansey squeezes his hand.

They continue into the darkness.

Let me go ahead and tag @neurosses because they’re always writing god bless and let me taggggggg @felagund-fiollaigean 👀 writing anything cool?

[friendofcars]

Last Line Game

Thank you @neurosses for tagging me!

Absolutely none of my current project has been written in order, but I’m pretty positive these are the last sentences I completed.

He is now both snake and road, and he feels the ancient pulse of the earth thump far below him. Its rhythm reminds him of his perpetual hunger to return home and his recurring failure to slake it. Ronan undulates himself from side to side, inching forward, willing the craggy mountains that herald the way to the Barns to crest over the horizon. But the dream is sieve-like, its logic pouring through like a stream of dust motes in the unrelenting light, and he cannot conjure anything resembling Singer’s Falls.

I’m not sure who is currently writing, so if you have a WIP you’d like to share, I’m tagging you. :)