#nepehws

[ejzah]

Younger nephew the other night: I remember when I was a baby. I remember from before I was a sperm.

All of us: I don’t think I want to know about those memories.

[publicitypolicy]

obligatory yes i love my nepehw and niece but everytime i babysit them i see red and feel demons in my prescence

[cocainechihuahua]

My nepehw wants a minecraft durag how do i find one?

[mpregeminem]

i wish hector would crytype i think it would be in character for him to make everyone's lives actively worse by making them decipher messages like "itt wass thechicken man i swear...... he tried t koilll my nepehw ;;; he putt h..;im in jaail tooo. ::.,,..,.,. al.l beecau,sse i wouldn;;t let hiim suck and fuck wi;t.,h hhis littlle byoofriieennd like 20 yeeaars ago......"

[shenanigans-of-a-young-person]

its official

our landlord has asked us to move by next month because he wants to fix and sell the house which is just annoying...and I am getting so much anxiety because of many things money is tight and rent is too high.he says he will give my parents money to move.but i really want to stay in our current city.i have lived here for 13 years it has felt like home.i just feel really bad for my niece and nephew to have to move like i know what its like to move around and i hated it.ugh but they are different.ugh this just suck 6 years in this house 6 years of memories bleh......but then again I’m trying to think positively like maybe a new house would be a fresh start a new beginning.maybe this is the universe pointing us me me to a brand new direction.all i cna do is hope ad think positive.i really would love to keep my niece and nephew at their school or at least in this city ..i know i know a house is just a material thing and it will probably be all just fine but dang it I hat change I hate going into the unknown.moving into a brand new neighborhood brand new shcool brand new stores?? ugh

[americankimchi]

HIS BROTHER AN DYOUR NEPEHW AR ELITERALLY TEN FEET AWAY WWX PELASEGHJKH

[firstreactionsafterfalling]

my nepehw is so cute but hes so wiggly !! relax sir youa re eight months old you have no place to be!!!!

[squeezemetillipop]

Yall really can’t just eat ya food. No ones gonna come to your house next monday and arrest you cause you didn’t tell ya racist grandma to shut the fuck up.

I don’t give a shit. It has zero affect on my life. Racism doesn’t live in your dining room. It lives in the systematic power that white people hold over Black people and other poc. You aint gonna fix that over turkey.

How about you do something that matters on an individual level like volunteer at thanksgiving drive, soup kitchen, invite your gay cousin that the family ignores, play with your nepehws and nieces, make sure everyone’s seen black panther, if you’re a man: wash the goddamn dishes and clean up, be nice to the sibling everyone secretly thinks is a disappointment and give genuine interest in the shit they care about and don’t judge them or lecture them, I repeat: if you’re a man WASH THE FUCKING DISHES

[ejzah]

My nepehws and I play this game where we pretend my hands are spiders crawling on them (you know, like you do) and they smack them away. Today, my younger nephew asked if the spider was radioactive. When I said yes, he laid down and covered himself up with a blanket, while looking very morose. He then informed me he needed to sleep, and upon further questioning, confirmed that he was sick Peter Parker. He kept it up off and on for the next hour.

[ejzah]

Today, I tested both of my nephews articulation (at my sister’s request, who’s also in speech), and there both well within the average range. Both of them took a while to get started talking and my older nephew had pretty significant articulation errors for some time. So, it’s nice to confirm that they’re doing alright.

[ejzah]

Yesterday, my older nephew told his mom he missed us (because he doesn’t come over as much anymore since starting school) and wanted to have a sleepover. So here he is, with his laptop, sleeping bag, and in the midst of building a tower.

[ejzah]

The other day my older nephew asked me if I made a dessert for after dinner. So, I’ve successfully secured my title as the crazy aunt who bakes.

[ejzah]

My older nephew recently got his first state testing results back and he scored really high on the math portion and a bit lower, but still good on the ELA part. Which is basically a flip of my SAT (only standardized tests I took before college) scores.

[ejzah]

Younger nephew, during dinner: Broccoli makes you poop!

Me, trying not to laugh: True.

Nephew: And cucumbers make ya poop too!

[ejzah]

Last night I was watching my nephews at their house and they were playing outside in their backyard. My younger nephew started shouting my name pretty loudly, which was admittedly annoying, but it wasn’t anything outrageous. After about half a minute, one of the bratty kids from next door (and I don’t use that word lightly, the kids from that house are rude and aggressive) shouts from his deck, “hey, shut up!” in a really nasty way. I was kind of behind a tree, so I guess he didn’t see me at first. When I moved into his line of vision, and glared at him, his whole demeanor changed. He suddenly smiled and waved at me, then tried to say hi to my other nephew.