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mieohmy · 3 years ago

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i wanna be okay. | lee jeno

PAIRING: bodyguard!jeno x fem reader

GENRE: strangers-to-lovers, e2ls, SLOW BURN, celebrity! au, rich kid! au, romance, fluff, angst, humor

WORD COUNT: 18.1k

NOTES: profanity, alcohol consumption, lots of arguing lol, somewhat heavy violence, blood, hospitals, injuries and im not a doctor so pls don’t come for me, flirting that kinda makes me wanna p*ke, slightly suggestive scenes, kissing

SUMMARY: the one where your rich CEO dad hires you a mysterious bodyguard to stay by your side 24/7. on the contrary, as much as jeno tries to stay away from you- it’s just utterly impossible.

authors note: wow. it’s finally done. akbskdjdks after so many months of hard work, i’ve finally finished and any feedback would be greatly appreciated <33 anyways, so much work and effort has been put into this, so i really hope anyone reading/waiting for this enjoys! thank you all- jae (also yes this is set near christmas time bc i was writing then and just only finished now :))

edit: epilogue here!

TAGLIST: @mrkcore @moonbeamsung @neonvision @sunzwoo @neocuddlytechnology @itsveronicaxxx @keemburley @rynshyuckies @neochaeryeong @terjeno @lighthyucks @blank-velvet @kaexloey @aedreamzy @kodasity @dnckfwk

The split second the door is opened for you to exit, the flashes start attacking you with bright and harsh lights, fighting alongside with strong and sturdy hands helping you out of the car. You won’t lie, it put you off a little. You were used to the cameras all your life, but especially today it seemed like the loud, intruding voices and crowded bodies actually made a dent in your hardened shell.

Nonetheless, the party was a success. The articles and pictures of you online were newsworthy (as per usual) even when the process of getting them was quite in contrast to what was actually put out to the public.

‘CEO of Meija Tech’s Daughter, y/n y/l/n, Makes Striking Appearance for the Opening…’

You sigh, scrolling past the articles and comments- the majority were commenting on the harsh conditions of the paparazzi at your entrance.

Ha, can’t they leave her alone for once?

They follow her everywhere… can’t they just let her walk where she wants?

I feel bad… she can’t even walk out of a car before getting mobbed…

Tch. The biggest company in the country can’t even afford bodyguards for the daughter of the CEO?

Enough. You turn your phone off with a sense of finality. You knew this was going to happen. As the years passed and your exposure to the outside public grew, it was inevitable that your life would be invaded by parasites that feed off you and your every move. You’re the host. And they’ll take anything.

The incoming sound of heels clicking against the hard marbled floor catches your attention. You glance up. Your father’s secretary stands with her hands on her hips. “Yes?” you question innocently.

“Your father wishes-“

You get up from your spot in the workers' lounge (as if you belonged there), not caring to hear the rest of her words. “Yeah, I got it.”

Now, the sounds of your heels clicking fill the hallways, people murmuring as you walk past with that air of superiority and your head held high. In reality, it was just the habit formed by countless lessons your father forced you to take beginning at the mere age of six. Not to forget the fact that you didn’t care to hear the people working under your father talk shit about you and the people you cared about.

Exiting the elevator, you’re surprised to see that there’s no one in your father’s office- besides himself, of course. You clasp your hands together.

“Father.” He tilts his head slightly in acknowledgment.

“Is there a reason you called me to your office at this time?” Your father clears his throat, and you know he’s being serious. Then again, when was he not?

“I’m sure you’ve seen the news articles.” Ah. That’s what it is.

He continues, “and I’ve been thinking for some time now…”

Your hands clasp tighter.

“Perhaps we should hire you a bodyguard. A strong and reliable one to stay by your side at all times to keep you safe.”

It sinks in, and you bristle. “Father!”

He shakes his head. “This is imperative now. Especially as your popularity continues to grow and it exposes you more and more to the outside world.”

“But I don’t want one?” you frown. “I think I’m perfectly fine. I feel content with how it is now.”

He sighs. “Your safety, my daughter.”

You cross your arms. “Yes, that’s true, but I really don’t believe I need to-“ He holds a hand up, and you fall silent. This is a one-sided argument.

“That’s all. You can leave now.”

You end up trudging out of his office towards the elevator with no destination in mind. Your mind flashes back. Is it really that bad to have a bodyguard? Why are you so hesitant about getting one?

You don’t actually know. Maybe it’s because you were scared. That’s all. Scared to acknowledge that you were already at that level of fame. It was really scary to face that fact. You, y/n, were at risk enough that you needed a bodyguard to protect you from things you didn’t want to happen. Things you really would want to imagine to either.

But who actually knows, right?

Four. That’s when you lost your mother and instead got raised by family caretakers while your father was busy running just one of the largest franchises in the world. Obviously, you didn’t have a family. Or friends. Or anyone, for that matter.

You suppose you should thank your father for the boarding school he sent you to at age thirteen. Most people would probably object and detest going with all their being, but you saw it as a chance to explore. Explore life past the strict rules, regulated behaviors, constant empty house, and everything that surrounded you.

And people you did meet. Mainly other rich (snotty) kids and teachers, it was a prestigious boarding school after all, but some of them you actually clicked with. And stayed with to this day.

“Minjeong!” You call out happily, running to meet your friend. It’s been almost a month since you last saw her, work being the main priority and barrier between the both of you.

She gives you a small hug, a smirk on her face. “Hey, daughter of CEO y/l/n, whose face is all over the news still.” You roll your eyes.

“Don’t remind me. I hate it.”

“But I like having a famous friend.”

You roll your eyes before abruptly standing up straighter. “Oh, I forgot to tell you. Father plans on hiring me a bodyguard to accompany me the entire day, like a pet dog. I think it’s a bit much.”

“If I recall, that’s what a bodyguard does.” She then nods her head. “It makes sense, y/n. You need one.”

You raise an eyebrow. “You’re on his side?” Her eyes widen and you slump over. “Ugh, Minjeong, I really don’t know what to do. I just don’t want one. Not one bit.”

A hand comes to rest over yours. “Hey, I’m always on your side. That’s why I think having a bodyguard would be good. They’ll keep you safe, y/n,” she insists. “Just think about it. If you really don’t want one, maybe your father will reconsider it. Truly.”

It’s not likely.

But two weeks go on, and it seems like your father has forgotten about it. You feel a bit more relaxed now that it seems to have passed, and you enter the 20-story building that your father runs.

It’s going too well, to be honest. Enjoying a nice, steaming cup of coffee with the bright and sunny weather outside, it was bound to go downhill from here.

A familiar voice calls your name.

You raise an eyebrow. “Chaeryeong? Why are you up here?”

Your other close friend who also attended the same boarding school as you and Minjeong when you were younger, walks in. She decided to get a job at your father’s company just to start her off somewhere since her father and yours were business partners.

She puts a hand on her hip. “Haven’t you heard?” You pause mid-sip. “Huh? Heard what?”

“Lee Jeno’s here.”

You blink. “Who?”

She gets even closer to you, placing both of her hands on your shoulders with an astounded expression. “The bodyguard? Good looking? The kind where everyone is talking about him good-looking?” She emphasizes with wide eyes. You open your mouth but you don’t even know the next words that are about to come out. “I-wha-“ Quickly, you collect yourself, tucking a strand of hair behind you. “Why is he here?”

Minjeong bursts into the room with a wild look in her eyes, the door banging against the wall with a loud bam. Your heads whip towards the door.

“That attractive guy is your new bodyguard?!”

❀

“Father,” you pout, hands placed together as you try your best to work your way out of whatever this is.

“No.”

It feels as if a cold breeze blows past you, and you shiver. Sneakily from underneath your eyelashes, your eyes shift to the person sitting stiffly in front of you.

It’s been five minutes, so you quickly give up. Sighing, you cross your legs, and then your arms as if it would assert your dominance. “Alright, shall we head off?”

The figure says nothing, only imitating your actions as you get up and walk out of your father’s office.

“No funny business, daughter of mine,” yup father calls out with a stern expression.

You roll your eyes.

The sound of the elevator beeping as you go down the many floors of the building fills the air. Soon enough, you can’t stand the silence.

“Y/n y/l/n, but I’m sure you know that already. And you?”

This may be the first time he’s properly looked at you. He clasps his hand behind his back like a typical bodyguard and you observe him carefully.

“Lee Jeno,” he responds curtly.

Carefully, you make a note in your head. “How old are you?” You wait for about a minute before his response comes. “I don’t believe I am inclined to answer that.”

You tilt your head to the side, not paying any heed to what he just said. “2000, right? Nice to meet you,” you comment briefly. Jeno stares out the window with that stoic face of his.

The rest of the ride down is in silence.

Serious about his job, much?

The silence appears to be there for you to contemplate how the rest of your life is going to play out with this man at your side. Or…. perhaps he would get fed up with you. That would be funny, and sadly at this moment, a dream come true.

Jerk. Annoying, straight-faced asshole.

You continue writing furiously at your desk, the pen sounds scratching and stamping against the lined paper while the memory from earlier in the day replays in your head for the nth time.

You scoff, “Mr. Lee Jeno, it’s just a hangout, that’s all. Just my two friends and I. Why can’t you let me go? I don’t think you-“

He stands there with no expression. “Your father said you couldn’t go out past 11 pm, Miss, so I’m not letting you go out. Please get into the car.” You feel your face flush with anger.

“Who said you could command me like that? Huh?”

The air feels cold and hot at the same time. The only thing that cuts through your heated expressions is the lowering of the window by the driver.

“Miss y/l/n? Is everything alright?”

You unfreeze, immediately smiling towards the man. “Of course, mister.”

Jeno next to you quickly bows, voice void of emotion. “Yes, sir. I apologize. I believe Miss y/l/n left something inside the building but it’s too late to get it. We’ll get into the car now, I apologize once again for the inconvenience.”

You stand there for a second, too astounded to do anything except stare at the person dressed in all black in front of you.

The audacity of this man.

You barely make it into the car (or home for that matter), accompanied by a glare from jeno.

You groan loudly, head falling onto the table with a thud.

A face peeks into the room. Your grandma (who wasn’t your grandmother by blood but you still liked to call her as such) stares at you, concerned. “Are you okay, y/n? Frustrated with work?”

You look up with an uneasy smile. “Oh, yeah, something like that…”

After she leaves satisfied with your answer, you properly smile. After all these years, she’s stuck by your side and taken care of you in replacement of your real family. Even now, she stays with you at your own place as the housekeeper.

You hope she never has to deal with dicks like Lee Jeno. You pinch your nose bridge, irked again.

It’s only been a week, and you’re at your wit's end. Why? Just why does the person you have to see every day for 24 hours on repeat have to be him? An aggravating, cocky, expressionless, handsome douch-

You stop yourself. And smack your face three, no, four times for good measure. You stand up violently with your palms planted flat on the table.

Let’s sleep.

You nod to yourself. Great idea.

❀

You stare holes into the man following after you into the building with his hands behind his back. You sincerely hope he gets the memo that you’re cursing him with your eyes.

You remember the first day of having Lee Jeno employed as your bodyguard. You remember the words you exchanged then.

You're fed up. You stop in your tracks, spinning around with your arms crossed and eyes glinting. “Do you have to follow me everywhere?”

Jeno stands there a few feet away, as he has been the whole day. “Do you know what a bodyguard does?” he retorts, unfazed.

You groan. “You know what? Go home. You can come back whenever my father’s around, so he at least thinks you’re doing your job. How’s that?” You point a finger at him aggressively. “I’ll pay you more. How much? What about-”

Jeno cocks his head. “Are you that much of an idiot?”

You scowl as you cross the lobby. Your bodyguard follows you into the elevator without a word and exits onto your floor without a word.

He’s even got his own personal desk now in your office, and you want to smack all the papers piled on his desk flying off.

Why the fuck does a bodyguard have his own papers to file?

You go to your desks respectively, not a single word exchanged. It lasts for about fourish hours until you give up. You stand up from your chair, exhaling as you glance at jeno. “I want to get something from the cafe. Let’s go.”

He gets up quietly, hands in his pocket as he follows you.

❀

You tap your hand on your chin thoughtfully. This order was especially important, as your day was already horrible enough and this one choice could quite literally change it.

Jeno sighs from behind you, reaching for his walkie-talkie. “No sir, we’re at the cafe. Miss y/n is taking a while with her order, I apologize on her behalf." It’s as if he was purposefully speaking louder for you to hear. You ignore him, gritting your teeth.

You practically start skipping in your designer heels, the taste of the drink makes you feel so giddy inside. Then it hits you. You left your layout plans back at home, so you switch your directions to head back there.

“Hey,” Jeno interrupts. “Where are you going? This isn’t the way back to the office.”

You ignore jeno once again.

Then a rough hand grabs your wrist, pulling you back with so much force. So much that you lose control and your drink is flung at jeno, soaking his neatly ironed suit.

Time pauses for a moment. You gasp, the air rushed out of you. Jeno freezes, the cold drink chilling his bones.

And then, it starts again. You snatch your hand out of his grip. “Are you crazy?” You yell, pissed. “What the hell is wrong with you!?”

Jeno grits his teeth, closing his eyes in an attempt to control himself. You raise a finger, directing it straight at his face, just in-between his onyx eyes. “Who said you could touch-“

You’re prevented from saying anything else as you feel your body being ripped from its spot and slammed against a nearby brick wall, the pain almost making your eyes well up with tears.

A hand slams harshly next to you, and your eyes flick towards the culprit. You swear you can see his eyes flash red, and his chest heaves heavily with anger.

“Why are you always acting like a bitch?”

He steps even closer and instead of backing down, you meet his intense gaze. After a few seconds, you scoff and roll your eyes, crossing your arms once again.

“Have you always been this spoiled?” He breathes out shakily, nostrils flaring. “Perhaps you should open your eyes to the people around you instead of being a selfish and egotistical brat.”

You notice a prominent vein sticking out in his neck from the close proximity and swallow. You look away and then push him hardly off of you, disgust in your eyes. “I don’t think you have the right to say anything like that as my bodyguard. I also don’t think you have the right to prevent me from going to my own home. Don’t you dare follow me anymore.”

Fuming, you stomp off.

❀

If there was ever a time you wanted to kill someone, now would be the perfect chance.

“Mr. Lee will be moving into your place.”

You clench your jaw. “Father, you can’t possibly make that person live in my home!”

“Who, again, is the one paying for your current residence?”

You falter before gathering your resolve. “Sure, you did. I’m grateful for that. But you only got it through connections.” You sigh, turning your head away. “It doesn’t matter. There’s no way I’ll ever let him take one step in my place.”

Your father’s eyes narrow. “You need surveillance hourly after that cafe stunt, and the only way to do that is by having Mr. Lee stay with you. At all times.”

❀

You don’t like this. Not at all.

Shoulders rigid and tense, you stand in front of the door to your penthouse located on the top floor. Still being a young adult, your father pulled some strings to let you live in an apartment building near the office with your care-taking staff.

Well, from now on, your bodyguard, Lee Jeno as well.

Hesitantly, you type in the passcode and watch the door swing open. Not bothering to look behind you, you call out, “The passcode is 0418. Remember that from now on because I won’t tell you again.”

You see your grandmother and immediately smile. She stops in her tracks, shocked at the appearance of a man in your home.

Jeno quickly bows. “Hello. It’s nice to meet you, Mrs… ?”

She laughs, already taken in by his appearance and apparent manners. You watch uninterestedly from the side, picking at your nails.

“No need for formalities, just call me auntie,” she smiles kindly.

You clear your throat, calling out sweetly, “Grandmother~”

She raises an eyebrow. You carefully tiptoe over to her, leaning in to whisper in her ear, “That man is my bodyguard. You know, the one I told you about…”

She pulls away, surprised, before looking back at jeno. “Really? You’re that handsome man?”

You choke on your spit. He smiles bashfully, and your mouth almost drops. The first time you’ve ever seen lee jeno smile, and it was… You look away.

pretty.

He bows again. “Thank you, auntie.”

Flustered, you call for a maid. “Take him to his room and tell him all the rules for staying here,” you order. Then you turn around and head towards your bedroom, desperately wishing for this to be a dream. For lee jeno who is currently staying in your home to all just be a dream.

It’s no use.

You get up, sighing. Hours later, you still can’t sleep. You can’t sleep knowing that lee jeno is a few bedrooms away, doing who knows what.

Probably sleeping, you remind yourself with a sarcastic laugh.

But for some reason, you can’t help but wonder about him. You groan, trying to get settled back into bed. And then you see his face again.

Lee jeno, smiling with those stupidly pretty eyes.

You want to rip your hair out.

Quietly tip-toeing, you walk out into the dark living room and across the hall to his guest room. Heart pounding, you stop at the door. Your hand slowly rests on the handle, and you contemplate for a second. Knocking and waiting give you no answer.

So you open it. Only to find the room empty, as if he was never there in the first place.

If this feeling was disappointment, perhaps? you don’t know what you would do, so you head back to your room, feeling as if you could finally shut your eyes.

❀

You get it, after a few days of coming home late at night with him always a few steps behind.

Jeno leaves. That bit was obvious, but it all made sense now. He always left late at night, and always came back early in the morning for you. At first, you thought it was a waste of time (and precious sleep) before you recalled what he said to you that one day.

“Perhaps you should open your eyes to the people around you instead of only being a selfish and egotistical brat.”

You laugh, upset when you really shouldn’t be. That’s right, jeno probably has his own family that he has to return to, that he never sees because of his demanding job. His job where he has to see your complaining, spoiled face every day. He probably has a girlfriend, or wife even-

You slap yourself. Stop wasting your time thinking about jeno. You know what? It’s time to say goodnight.

You needed to rest, after all, tomorrow was a big day. Another one added to the countless big days you’ve already had in your youth and age.

❀

“I conclude my proposition for the upcoming 2022 schedule. I thank you all for your attention and attendance.” You bow, and rounds of claps fill the room.

Unbeknownst to you, jeno stands out to the side of the meeting room, leaning against the wall as he waits for you. He stood planted like that for hours since the beginning of the meeting.

He looks down at the ground, still hearing the lasting effects of the applause from your presentation. Jeno won’t lie- he’s impressed. Okay so maybe at first he thought you were just another snotty rich kid with nothing better to do than spend all your money, but it turns out you can be more than that. He almost scoffs at the thought.

The way you exuded confidence- it was oozing out of you and into everyone in the room, and your voice speaking melodies (and many things he didn’t understand), but it was enough to make him shiver.

After finishing the ending remarks, you finally notice jeno’s presence. How long has he been there?

You walk over with a neutral expression on your face. You’re waiting, you’re not sure what for, but you’re waiting for him.

And all he does is stare.

You don’t get flustered. Not easily. And lee jeno staring at you for a long time made you flustered.

You bite your lip, frustrated. “What?” You finally bark. No response.

“What are you looking at?” You demand, looking disgusted. You walk off without another word. If you were being honest, you may have seemed rude but you were actually fretting internally, heart racing.

Was it your hair?

Self-consciously, you pat the top of your head, looking for a nearby mirror.

No way- this morning you purposely set your alarm early to do your hair for the meeting and so a certain someone would notice- you cough suddenly, thoughts interrupted by the approaching executive director. Immediately, you stop and put your act on, smiling and bowing. “How are you, sir?”

If you had just stayed back one more second, then you might’ve heard jeno murmur,

“you.”

❀

You bite your lip, searching through desk after desk.

Where could it be?

You swear you saw your father put it in the bottom left drawer, but it wasn’t there.

Running a hand through your hair, you quickly double-check that no one else is in the room, and continue the search. Your eyes gleam.

Found it.

The car keys dangle in your hand, practically shining in the light. It’s been months since you’ve last seen your precious baby, months since your father forbid you from driving. Probably to keep you from escaping late at night and doing things you shouldn’t be doing as the famous daughter of a CEO.

“What are you doing?”

Shit. You scramble to your feet, fixing your outfit.

Jeno stands in front of you, looking unimpressed. “What are those?”

You grow defensive, trying not to look as guilty or suspicious as possible while silently cursing him in your head. “Is asking questions the only thing you do?”

He shifts. “Maybe, if those car keys are yours.” He opens his mouth again. “I-“

In two seconds you’re in front of him, hands behind your back. Maybe just this once, it’ll work…

You look up at him from under your eyelashes, trying to muster the most pitiful (and childish) expression you can. “Please, oh please, my wonderful dear bodyguard, will you let me off just this once?” You squeeze your eyes shut. “I promise I’ll never treat you horribly or yell at you ever again. If you want, I won’t even talk to you anymore. I swear, these are the keys to my happiness-“

You peek an eye open, waiting hesitantly for his reaction.

You pout using your special pitiful eyes, leaning in closer. “Please, Mr. Lee, I really need this…”

Jeno stands there, still as a rock and completely unfazed by your little stunt. He blinks, clasping his arms behind his back and clearing his throat. “Are you done?”

You stop the act, deflated. You tilt your head to the side, anger building inside you once again.

He seems oblivious, looking outside the window at the scenery. “I believe your friend requested to have lunch with you at this time, miss.” You stand up straighter, temporarily distracted. “Huh? Who?”

❀

The CEO eventually calls Jeno into his office later that night.

Jeno bows, awaiting his next words. “You called me in, sir?” Your father sighs, hands clasped together at his desk. “I happened to see y/n exit my office earlier today, although I’m certain she did not have any engagements or reasons to be in here. Is there something you need to tell me?”

Jeno inhales, thinking back to this morning with your hands cutely clasped in front of you and eyes shut. That side of you he never would have expected- that made his hands clammy. When was the last time he had clammy hands?

He swallows, bowing once again.

“No, sir.”

The CEO cocks his head. “Really?”

“I believe she was just grabbing her jacket that she left there earlier this morning.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes sir.”

He gestures with a hand, “If that’s all, you’re dismissed.”

Jeno turns to leave, a storm brewing inside of him.

❀

It’s been a week and your father hasn’t said anything. You giggle to yourself before looking up.

“Mr. Jeno!”

He sighs, walking to your desk. “Yes?”

You look around animatedly, humming. “I wonder… could you get me two coffees?”

Jeno’s eye twitches. You never break eye contact, staring deeply into his eyes with a sparkle. “Pretty please? I’ll pay you back. Extra if you want.”

You smile brightly up at him, and he turns away. Once jeno leaves, you get back to your work, humming happily.

Chareryeong’s mouth drops open from across the table after seeing your interaction. She quickly glances around before turning to you and whispering, “I thought you hated that man? All you did was talk shit about him to me.”

You tap your pencil against your papers quickly scribbling something down.

“Well… it’s turned out to be better than I originally thought.”

“What do you mean?”

You shrug. “Not sure, he’s just an interesting man. He only talks when talked to, and doesn’t show an ounce of emotion.”

“Except when he’s pissed at me,” you add quickly, frowning.

You dramatically whip your head towards the nearby window, sunlight shining through to light up the best features of your face while you study the beams of light.

“I want to be the one to get him to open up. I want to unlock those secrets of his,” you murmur wistfully.

She shakes her head. “Are you crazy? Or a pervert? No, both?”

You send a deadly glare towards Chaeryeong. “I’m not, I’m just hungry.” You frown, “How long do you think he’ll take to get back?”

❀

Two cups of coffee are slammed onto the desk, and you almost flinch before proceeding to let out a blindingly breathtaking smile once you realize who it is in front of you. “Thanks, my dear bodyguard.”

He stands there, unamused.

Sighing, you pick up a cup and offer it to him. “I got it for you.”

Oh, really? He thinks mockingly to himself. “I don’t drink coffee,” he states simply before turning away.

You stare down the back of jeno, from his perfectly styled hair to his broad shoulders and down to neatly tied shoes. Tch.

There’s no need for you to worry, after all, you’ll have plenty more chances.

❀

This game of cat and mouse continues on, to jeno’s pure dislike. He would never admit it, but intrigue fills him just as much. You intimidate him. Your dramatic 360 change in behavior around jeno confused not only him but the people around you. Either way, jeno refuses to fall into your trap. No matter how sweetly you talk to him with that infuriating (read: cute) look on your face.

-except for times such as these, when you act so stubborn and do such idiotic things jeno can’t stand to comprehend you.

So there was a reason you didn’t go far away from your house or father’s building into the public that often when alone.

Your eyebrow twitches. You quietly clear your throat, lowering your head even closer to the ground as if it’ll hide your identity anymore. You prayed that the baseball cap you wore purposefully to cover your face would work, but obviously, it didn’t- judging by the whispers around you.

“Excuse me, are you by chance, y/n y/l/n?”

You smile sheepishly, lowering your head even more while cursing internally. “Oh, uh, you see-“

“Guys, that’s CEO y/l/n’s daughter.”

“No way, you’re right.”

“Do you think I can get a picture? I’ve never been this close to a celebrity before..”

“Damn, she’s a lot prettier in person…”

Before you know it, a crowd surrounds you in the store while alarms go off in your head. You hear their insistent demand for pictures or autographs and see the confusion by the workers in the store. Cringing, you look around for the exit, avoiding hands reaching towards your body as you scramble to escape.

Jeno… you think, panicking. Jeno. Where is he?

That’s right. He said he was going for a walk while you were shopping in the store. Fuck, you curse.

And then, it’s like heaven appears right before your eyes. Amid the mob, you see a hand reach for you, and then a firm grip on your wrist pulls you out.

It’s jeno, gritting his teeth as he takes you away and makes a break for it. You feel like you’re in an action movie, running away in slow motion as jeno drags you along.

He turns left, then left again, and then right. You’re such a mess, adrenaline pumping through your veins as you and jeno turn a corner, almost running into another couple.

Jeno halts immediately, aggressively but still somehow politely commanding something from them. You’re confused, brain feeling like it’s running a thousand miles per hour. He knocks off your hat quickly while still on the lookout- you’re not even sure how he’s doing all these things at once.

You feel something shoved on top of your head and it finally clicks when you spot jeno wrapping the (hideous) jacket the lady was wearing just a few seconds ago around you.

He puts a cap on, presumably the man’s, and quickly thanks the confused couple before pulling you to a secluded corner by the edge of a building.

“What are you-“

You hear voices and you’re sure there was a quick hint of your name, causing you to gasp in fear.

Jeno bites his lip, looking around in desperation before he continues past the corner, revealing a sketchy, dark alleyway.

He starts toward it but you resist, pulling back without budging.

His head whips back toward you. “What are you-?”

You glare indignantly back at him. “I’m not going down that alley. You have no clue what’s in there.”

He rolls his eyes. “We don’t have time.” You pull your hand out of his grip, crossing your arms as you look to the side. “I will not.”

“You’re being a brat,” he snaps, and you nod stubbornly in acknowledgment. “Sure- I am. But you’re not making me go in that awful place.” Right as you finish, you hear multiple voices getting closer, and it takes a lot in you to not whimper.

“Idiot,” he hisses, before peeking past the corner as the voices get louder and louder. You don’t have time to process before you feel jeno push you against the wall with that seemingly inhumane bodyguard strength of his, just like that time before, except this time he leans into you, caging you underneath his arms.

“What are you- why-“ you splutter, but his face comes so close to yours that you simply shut your eyes tightly in response. You wait, feeling his soft breathing right above your mouth and lips hovering- almost touching yours.

But he never does. Even when the crowd walks by, unknowingly passing you two with your disguises, you grip tightly onto his jacket.

Jeno doesn’t let go until you’re safe. He releases you from under him, and you finally feel like you can breathe.

You hate the fact that jeno smelled really disgustingly good. Especially good- you can almost imagine, a pine forest with a woody and fresh scent that was stuck forever in your head. Perhaps the scent just reminded you of things you wished for that jeno carried with him.

You walk behind jeno, following like a lost puppy back to the car pickup area. You feel like you just ran a 5k, the adrenaline still not having faded yet.

You can just tell by jeno’s tense shoulders that he is probably, absolutely furious. When you reach the designated spot, waiting for the car to come pick you guys up, he turns to you with fists clenched.

“Why,” he shudders, “why did you think it was a good idea to go out in public without me? Did you really think no one would recognize you? Are you that fucking stupid?”

You look away, fidgeting. “I thought the hat would be enough to cover my face but…”

He scoffs, putting his hands on his hips. “A baseball cap isn’t enough to hide your identity- you know people can still see you with a hat on, right?”

He looks away, sarcastically chuckling. “Or maybe not, since you don’t even go outside.”

The car finally pulls up as you feel the anger boil through your body.

“Sure. Maybe not, but that doesn’t mean I can’t take care of myself, you entitled prick!” You yell indignantly, two seconds away from flipping him off and calling for an uber.

“You can’t for shit,” jeno growls back. He takes your arm, opening the door, and forcefully putting you in the car. He thanks the valet driver, exchanging places and getting into the driver's seat.

You wait until he gets adjusted on the road again before speaking up, looking straight at his side profile. “I’m fine. Nobody got hurt, so it’s alright. I understand what to do from now on, so you don’t have to be mad anymore.“

The car rolls to a stop at the red light.

“You could’ve died. How can you not get that into your dense brain?” He snaps. “Your life is of uttermost importance- why do you even think people like me exist? To protect people's lives, your life, because you can’t afford to get hurt. You don’t understand the repercussions of your actions.”

The rest of the ride is in silence. You don’t dare to look at him anymore. When he reaches your apartment building, you get out and walk in without a single look back.

He sighs, reaching to move the car out of park when he spots an unfamiliar item.

Your jacket. Jeno sighs, deciding that he doesn’t want any of your belongings left in this car. He hesitates, poking the inside of his cheek with his tongue before finally unbuckling his seatbelt and getting out.

When he reaches your door, he’s about to knock before he remembers you told him the passcode before.

“Remember that from now on because I won’t tell you again.”

The door unlocks with a quiet beep, swinging open gently. Jeno goes in silently as it’s in his nature, contemplating if he should just leave your jacket on the couch when he sees your room door open.

Peeking past, the only thing in sight is you, huddled by the foot of your bed and looking so small, perhaps the smallest he’s ever seen you. Jeno stops, confused. It’s silent.

He places your jacket down and takes a few steps towards your figure. As he gets closer, he can hear only one thing.

The sound of your quiet sniffles. That’s when he sees your body shaking.

Instinct kicks in and jeno bursts through the door and runs to your side, grabbing your shoulders and whipping you around so he can assess the damage.

You freeze awkwardly, bewildered. “W-what are you doing?”

He stills, equally as confused as you are. And then you gasp, horrified. “Did you follow me in? Did you watch me the entire time?”

Jeno feels shock and embarrassment course through his veins. You weren’t hurt.

You were crying.

How could he not notice before he saw your fluttering, watery eyes, and red nose?

Jeno looks down, voice soft. “Why… what’s wrong?”

Abruptly, you wipe your eyes and clear your throat. Sheepishly, you laugh. “It’s nothing, I just thought-“

You cut your sentence off midway, bringing a hand to run through your hair while you collect yourself.

This time, your voice comes out small and slow, as if you were a child that just got scolded. “I’m scared, jeno. You were right.”

You look away, head down so your hair falls in front of your face. “It was really scary.” Your voice is timid and hesitant. “What am I supposed to do now when I can’t even go outside without fearing for my life? When did things get like this?”

Your eyes slowly raise to look at him as you try to hold back from quivering. “I just… i wanna be okay.”

A few beats of silence pass. Eventually, Jeno’s hand reaches out, and it falls on the back of your neck, pushing you forward until your forehead rests against his.

Your breath hitches.

“I’m sorry.”

The sound of his voice, so soft and tender, sends shivers throughout your body.

“I promise I’ll protect you. You don’t have to be scared any longer, because I’m here, okay? I’m here to keep you safe, remember it’s my duty to make sure nothing happens to you. I’ll be the one to make you okay.” He stares at you, gazing deeply into your eyes. You can’t seem to break away from his dark eyes, full of compassion and sincerity.

He exhales, slowly releasing you. “Come on,” he stands up and straightens himself, “it’s been a long day and you should go to sleep.”

You nod, head empty except for exhaustion.

You stare up at the ceiling after getting tucked into bed. You can see jeno standing awkwardly by the door at the edge of your view, waiting. Shifting under the covers, you call out hesitantly, “Will you stay? Just-” you swallow, “just stay near me until I fall asleep? So I can feel safe?” Your voice ends in a whisper.

Jeno does. He watches you for a while, not knowing if he should stay or go. Just so he doesn’t feel like those creepy stalkers in movies, he goes to sit by the chair near your bed, staring at your peaceful face and your breaths soon evening out.

Jeno leaves after cleaning up the place a little bit, putting your shoes by the door and jacket up even though he knew you had workers hired to do those jobs.

Jeno leaves after delicately brushing the stray hairs off your face.

❀

It’s a beautiful morning. You wake up feeling strangely refreshed, getting out of bed and padding over to your master bathroom to get ready for the day.

You see swollen eyes staring back at you in the mirror, weird. Leaving over the sink, you turn on the faucet, about to run your hands under the water-

when it hits you.

Everything that happened yesterday. Everything comes rushing back.

You freeze, a hand covering your mouth as you let out a muffled shriek. The crowd chasing you, jeno almost kissing you, him catching you crying, the “will you stay?”

You silently hyperventilate, pacing back and forth across the marbled flooring. There’s no way you can go to work today. Absolutely no way.

❀

You sit rigidly at your desk in the office, too distracted to focus so your hands type random words onto the computer, keyboard clacking erratically.

So far, Jeno hasn’t said or done anything differently. He’s greeted you the same, spoke the same- nothing seems to be off. Except you, obviously.

Your father’s secretary walks in, accompanied by the sharp clicking of her heels. “Y/n, dear, your father was wondering when you would submit the instruction plans.”

You sit up straight. “Instruction plans?” you ask, blinking. She raises an eyebrow. “The one due today?”

Well, shit.

❀

You already knew the moment you screwed up you would be sent to the one and only- your father’s office.

It’s deadly quiet, and you stand with your head lowered to the ground and hands clasped behind your back.

“Y/n.”

You bite your lip. “Father.”

“How can I have such high expectations of you when you forget imperative things like these plans? You knew they were due today. We were counting on you, and we didn’t dare expect them to come in five hours late.”

You breathe in, and then out. “Forgive me, father. It was a one-time mistake that I know I will never do again. I promise to keep track of all my schedules from now on.”

“Should I get you your own personal secretary-“

“No!” You blurt out instinctively, although you catch yourself a second later, swiftly composing yourself. “No thank you. I had some issues yesterday but I assure you it will never happen again.”

He dismisses you with a hand.

Things seemed to settle down again after that. Surprisingly, you and jeno hadn’t gotten in many major arguments after that. It was more of bickering. Friendly bickering that actually left you laughing more times than fuming. It was a nice change to see jeno smiling more often. And unbeknownst to you, he felt the same.

Before jeno clocks in one fine morning, chaeryeong rolls her chair over to your desk. You look at her, waiting for her next words.

“So… you and jeno?” An incomprehensible sound escapes your mouth without warning, causing her to raise her eyebrows higher. Quickly, you clear your throat. “What are you talking about?”

She holds back a laugh. “Every time I see you two around the building, you’re always talking. And smiling.”

You look back towards your computer screen awkwardly- suspiciously. “So? Are we not allowed to do that?” She sends you another knowing look, one that you ignore, instead focusing back on your work.

Jeno comes in strangely late, specifically 40 minutes late. And he’s never late. You watch him plop down at his desk with a disgruntled grunt, sluggishly getting his things prepped for the day. A frown settles on your face unconsciously.

The whole day, he acts strange. He looks exhausted- not the kind that you’re familiar with- not the one you usually have when there’s a big presentation the next day and you can’t sleep, but more just like when you’re tired of life. Done with living. Exhausted from life.

His responses to your questions are short. Even when you ask if there’s something wrong, he just brushes it off or looks away. It throws off your whole day. It's difficult when he spends all his time with you, constantly at your side, and it bothers you much more than you would have liked.

Even the drive home is completely silent. You study him from the side, his eyebrows furrowed and jaw tense like they have been all day.

You wait until he reaches your apartment building before speaking up hesitantly. “Are you really alright, jeno?”

He murmurs an unconvincing, “yeah.”

“Are you sure? You’ve been-“

“I said I’m fine!” he snaps, turning to you with a spark in his eyes before it dissipates. He looks away, fidgeting with his fingers. “Sorry, didn’t mean to yell at you. It’s nothing you did. Just don’t worry about me,” he says, voice considerably lower.

A tiny nod escapes from you. You both make your way up quietly to your home, the silence feeling strange as you and jeno usually chatted during the way up, but obviously, that didn’t happen today.

Once you enter and greet all the workers, you excuse yourself to wash up in your master bathroom, leaving jeno to linger in the living area. You assume he’s going to leave sooner than later as he always does, never once having stayed the night at your place since your father directed him to do so.

You take your sweet time, allowing yourself to wash away all the stressful things of the day as you get ready for bed. But before you do, you go outside to get a glass of water and chat with your grandmother.

What you did not expect was to see jeno’s sleeping figure on your plush couch, body rising and falling peacefully with his breaths. He must’ve been exhausted, having fallen asleep like that. You stop in your tracks, processing the sight. What in the world?

Swallowing, you decide to carefully walk closer, examining his face and how even in his slumber he still looks stressed.

A sound diverts your attention, a couple of the maids standing there patiently. You silently signal for them to leave you two in peace.

You study him with an unreadable expression. “Did you have a rough day?” You whisper softly, a concerned look on your face. “You seemed so off the whole day, I have no clue what happened to you.” You look around before exhaling and reaching out a hand to fix a piece of his styled hair that fell out of its place.

“I’m- uh, I’m sorry?”

You’re unsure of what to do or say next, so you grab a blanket from the guest room and attempt to cover him as best as you can, especially for the fact that you had never done anything like this to someone else before.

Before you head to bed, you inform the workers to let him sleep on the couch for the night. You have no idea why this instinct comes over you- why it makes you do these things for him.

❀

Jeno wakes up with the sun in his face, an unfamiliar background coming into focus. He rests there for a moment, allowing his body to fully wake up.

He shifts- his clothes, he’s still in his suit- and where even is he?

Sitting up, it eventually comes back to him in pieces. That’s right, he fell asleep at your place on your couch. But the blanket? He has no recollection of anything else.

Jeno spots a glass of water on the table, and he glances around before figuring it must be for him. He takes a gulp, and then another one, and then another before he realizes he’s finished it all.

He hears a familiar voice. “Mr. Jeno?”

It’s your grandmother. She smiles kindly at him. “The missus informed me to tell you that you have the day off. Just rest, alright?”

His eye twitches. “Pardon?”

She laughs. “You don’t have to work today, dear. Don’t go to the office. Y/n especially enforced that.”

He stares at the white blanket still covering him, thinking back to last night. Before your grandmother leaves him be, she has her last remark. “She was really concerned for you after last night. Please take better care of yourself, jeno.”

“Y/n? Really?” All jeno can do is wonder why.

You sit there, as still as a statue while the makeup artists and hairstylists work their magic. It’s been a while since you’ve gone out to a public event due to your father’s advice that the was best to let things cool off after those crazy fan situations. It’s been a while since you’ve attended one of these events as a brand ambassador.

You stand head to toe dressed in their clothes, practically a walking advertisement. The last time you remember doing any activity related to their brand was when you shot for a photo shoot to be printed on magazines sent out all over the country.

After the last finishing touches are put on your face, you thank everyone and head for the car to take you to the event’s location.

Jeno greets you in the car, and you nod with a grim smile. There wasn’t a feeling of nervousness in you, more of a numb sense filling your body. You watch the night lights zoom by through the car window, and occasionally sounds beeping from jeno’s walkie-talkie would fill the air.

You know when you’re getting close because the sounds of fans and chatter and just about everything get louder and louder. When the car rolls to a stop, you brace yourself. Jeno gets out first, and that’s when you suddenly freeze. Someone opens the door, and suddenly all the sounds are amplified. The screams from fans, cameras clicking, employees of the event are all there. But again, just as it once happened before, a hand extends out to you.

It’s Jeno’s.

You gulp, internally commanding yourself to put on your public face while taking his hand out of the car.

The flashing lights and desperate paparazzi reaching out to you are familiar. Instead, you just try your best to smile and keep a cool head. But it’s difficult when there are so many people surrounding you, trapping you.

You look up at jeno.

And once again, it feels like time freezes. Suddenly he’s the one that seems so cool in the midst of flashing lights, the stoic expression on his face as he holds a hand out to make way as your bodyguard takes your breath away.

You’re so caught up in staring at him, gulping, that you don’t know if you’re even moving forward. Or paying attention.

Well, evidently not since you don’t notice a mic shoved at you until it’s right in your face. You flinch, and jeno immediately shields you, pushing it away. He guides you to another route that’s not blocked by as many people. Jeno waits until there’s a moment for you to breathe before asking with the same concern he once showed you before. “Are you okay?”

Throat dry, you can’t bring yourself to respond so you nod quickly. Then you’re swept into the rest of the event and all of its happenings. Luckily, you’re professional enough to compose yourself for the rest of your appearance at the show.

You pose for pictures just like those professional models, answer questions flawlessly, and interact with the other famous people there all while keeping a smile on your face at all times. There’s a chance it all came off looking fake, but you’re hoping that it was enough to convince the public and the people.

The people. The fans. Your fans. Your fans that you love and appreciate the most. (Excluding the crazy ones that completely disregard your rights as a human being.)

It’s only when they ask for pictures or signatures from you that you truly smile. And jeno can clearly see that. Even when he’s farther off, not the one in the spotlight, he can see your felicitous smile as you pose with your adoring supporters. The times when you’re not right in front of the camera, you’ll nudge him, muttering about how cute your fans are or how talented they are with the creative banners they make for you.

Jeno has never seen this side of you before. He’s only seen the fear in your eyes when those intrusive fans suddenly surrounded you. He’s only seen the crying, upset you who’s scared to be who you are.

But when you smile at them, he unknowingly smiles at you.

❀

The event lasts for five hours, including preparation beforehand and closing statements. Not necessarily a long time, but jeno isn’t used to constantly watching over one person's every move or constantly being in fear something will happen to you after those previous times. Every time you leave his sight, he can’t truly breathe until he sees you again.

Finally, when you wave goodbye to all your admirers and get into the car, can jeno’s heart relax. You breathe a sigh of relief, buckling your seatbelt as jeno shifts the car into drive.

“You looked nice today,” he comments out of the blue.

You glance at him, observing as he drives out of the venue. But perhaps, you might’ve looked too much for too long. You didn’t pay attention to how long you really were staring at him.

“Why are you looking at me so much today?”

You inhale sharply, turning away. “H-huh? What are you talking about?” You pretend to act oblivious, murmuring something random about the weather finally getting cooler. Jeno chuckles quietly, driving the rest of the way home.

When he pulls up and opens the door for you, you finally realize the extent to which your feet hurt, having stood around in heels for far too long. You can’t wait to get up to the comfort of your penthouse and take them off- quite actually the best feeling ever.

You take a few steps before unexpectedly turning around to face jeno. He stops, somewhat surprised.

“Why don’t you actually sleep at my place? Why do you leave in the middle of the night and come back early in the morning?”

His eyes widen. A few beats pass with no answer.

At last, you look down, shrugging. “I was just curious, that’s all. You don’t have to answer,” you reply, reassuring him with a smile.

“Go home and get some rest. Thanks for sticking with me today.” You quickly bow and run inside the apartment, heart pounding erratically. Jeno can only stand there, shocked while watching your silhouette get smaller and smaller until it disappears into the building.

What could this be?

It keeps happening. Whenever he holds a hand for you to take while stepping out from the car or opens doors for you- or does anything more than his job doesn’t necessarily entail. Jeno’s been doing it since the beginning, whether you asked him to or not. So why is it suddenly affecting you like this? Why does it even make a difference? It’s just manners, but to you, it’s more.

When you open the door to the car in the morning and he turns to look at you from the driver’s seat, it’s like a scene from those movies. It always plays out in slow motion, jeno in his clean suit and freshly styled hair turning around to greet you. The first time you experienced this, you almost shut the door and quite literally walked back into the building. It made you feel weird- an unavoidable feeling building inside each time it happened, and you couldn’t describe it.

Things like that would make you wonder. Is it just formality? You’ve seen how jeno acts around others, he’s truly a polite and well-mannered person. Is he just being nice to you since he was hired by your father? Those thoughts would invade your mind from time to time. Then again, you didn’t always have that kind of precious time to dwell on that, you were the famous daughter of the biggest CEO in the country. But that didn’t mean you still couldn’t try.

Tuesday. 8 am.

“Jeno!” You greet enthusiastically as he walks into your office as if you hadn’t seen him just sometime earlier when he came to pick you up to head to work.

“Good morning,” he responds calmly. You watch him get settled in at his desk.

11 am.

You blow a stray hair out of your face, tapping your pen against the table repeatedly as you think of a solution. Your brain feels like it’s hanging on a thin wire, about to snap. This is why you didn’t want to follow in your father’s footsteps, you remind yourself.

You frown silently, eyes wandering around the room. Naturally, they fall on jeno whose attention was focused on his phone, and you assume he’s playing his weird shooting game considering his furrowed eyebrows and hunched shoulders. You’ve watched him play it a couple of times before, whenever he was bored while waiting for you after some long meeting or discussion.

A lightbulb goes off in your head, causing a mischievous smile to appear on your face. Target acquired. You position yourself in your wheely chair and push. If your father saw, you would be scolded for “improper office etiquette.”

The wheels make a satisfying sound as they cruise against the ground, going straight in the direction you wanted. You roll up right next to jeno’s desk, one arm on the armrest as you place your chin in the palm of your hand, lingering. He doesn’t seem to notice your presence so you wait by peering down at his screen, eventually getting into his game.

He gets shot, his fingers flying wildly over the screen, and you let out a horrified gasp. Jeno’s head whips around before his sight lands on you and he visibly relaxes. “Fucking hell, you scared me.”

You smile innocently.

He shuts off the device. “What are you doing? Aren't you working?” You roll your eyes. “I can’t. I’m stuck. Help me, my dear bodyguard.”

Jeno pauses the game thoughtfully, looking at the clock on the wall next to him. “It’s almost lunchtime. Do you plan on going out?”

A wide smile breaks onto your face. “Well, now that you mention it…” Jeno stifles laughter as you eagerly grab your stuff and get ready to head out together.

Friday. Noon.

“Do you like your bodyguard?” Minjeong unexpectedly asks in the middle of your girls’ lunch.

You tilt your head to the side, sipping on your drink. “Do I like Jeno? I mean, sure. We don’t fight as much as we used to…” you nod pensively.

Chaeryeong snickers while Minjeong rolls her eyes.

“Y/n, sweetie. I mean like as in feeling attraction towards him. Any romantic feelings?” she emphasizes. You stop sipping, your mouth parting off the straw habitually.

“What,” you swallow, “makes you ask that?”

They both shrug simultaneously. There’s a certain look in their eyes that you can’t decipher. “You see,” Minjeong starts, “this is the first time in our lives that we’ve seen you act like this towards someone of the opposite sex.”

You think you hear crickets chirping off from far away. In what language would you possibly be able to understand what that means?

Chaeryeong bursts out laughing at the dumbfounded expression on your face before adding, “yeah, and he even calls you by your first name. Did he ask you or did you ask him to do that-”

You clear your throat, “You know what? I think I have to go. Jeno must be waiting for me,” you cough. “Oh dear, look at the time- I need to head out. I’ll contact you guys later!”

You pathetically smile for a split second before gathering your things and dashing off, looking for the nearest exit and private area for you to call jeno to come pick you up.

“Hello? The bill!” Minjeong calls out indignantly.

You curse. “I’ll get it next time,” you yell back before squeezing your eyes shut and pushing past the doors.

While walking away, you round past a corner without paying attention, too distracted trying to contact jeno. You bump into something firm, stumbling back.

You look up, it’s a random man that you’ve never seen and don't want to anymore after seeing how his face changes when he takes in your appearance. You try to smile politely, although you don’t feel like it.

“Excuse me.” Your attempt to sidestep the man fails. He steps in your way purposefully, trying to laugh and smile as if it was a coincidental accident. This has happened to you too many times to count, so it only annoys you even further at this point.

“Hey, are you interested in-"

“Sorry. "I’m busy at the moment.” You don’t even attempt to smile at this point. He frowns, and you try again to pass him.

“Wait-“ he takes your arm and you feel disgust rise through you. “Let me go,” you command. He doesn’t.

“Oh, come on-“

“What do you think you’re doing?” You both turn around, and your heart sinks in relief when you see him. Jeno takes your hand, and you gasp when he pulls you closer to him. “Excuse you, but she’s with me. Thank you and goodbye.”

You can barely stutter anything out as he guides you to a secluded area, sitting you down on a nearby bench. Jeno places his hands on his hips. “Don’t go off like that without letting me know,” he scolds gently. “You scared me.”

You inhale sharply, avoiding his gaze. “A-alright.”

He raises an eyebrow at your reaction but his next words get interrupted by a call on his phone, and he turns around to answer.

You take this chance to place your hand softly on your chest, right above where your heart was. Your heart that was racing.

❀

This is the first time you’ve gone to a party with jeno. A formal one, but it’s still a party nevertheless.

You already spilled all the details to jeno in the car, informing him on what these ‘parties’ were really for. It was for those old snotty rich people to either set up their kids together or gossip to gain information and get an upper hand for their businesses. Essentially- a damn waste of your time. But as your father once said, any way to boost your reputation and public standing is good enough.

He nods, soaking in all your words. You take his hand and squeeze it gently. “Sorry, Jen,” and the nickname makes his chest tighten, “but it’s going to be a whole lot more boring than my father’s meetings.”

❀

Turns out that you’re very right.

Jeno spends most of his time people-watching. Of course, he was still guarding you, his eyes would flick over towards you occasionally, but there’s wasn’t much to see when 99% the time you had a fake smile on your face. Yes, the business-friendly one that most people wouldn’t catch, but jeno has seen it enough times to know what was a real or a fake smile from you.

He can easily describe the way your eyes crinkle and your mouth splits into a wide grin- he swears your dark orbs sparkle every time. But that wasn’t the kind of smile you wore now.

Jeno politely declines an offer for a glass of champagne for the 10th time- he doesn’t dare drink on the job. He looks over to where you are, and immediately his eyes capture the picture of you by the bar, drink placed next to you as you stare up at whatever stupid show is on the widescreen tv, the colors flashing back down onto your skin.

His gaze never breaks until he sees an unfamiliar man slide next to you. His bodyguard instincts go off but you don’t seem to notice the man and he doesn’t do anything to interact with you. Jeno hesitates, it wasn’t his duty to cut in whenever he wanted, wherever he wanted. He watches you talk for a couple of minutes, not paying too much attention.

He sighs, about to turn away when he catches a flash of something in the man’s hand, reflected off from the tv screen’s lights- the hand that’s moving away from your glass.

Well, shit. You’re completely clueless, having looked in the opposite direction of that man and therefore didn’t see anything suspicious of the sort. Immediately, jeno gets up from his spot leaning against the wall, making his way over to you. In the process, he encounters at least five groups of people that get in his way and prevent his path towards you.

Puffing a breath of frustration, you’ve moved to another part of the room with the glass in your hand by the time he gets over to the bar, seemingly very deep in conversation with a few important-looking people judging by their outfits.

Jeno’s sweating nervous sweat in his suit and he absolutely hates it. Every single time you raise the glass to your lips only to bring it back down because you have something important to contribute to the conversation, he feels like a piece of him has shriveled up and died.

It’s not as simple as it seems. More specifically, it’s just not his right to jump in whoever he wants. It’s rude etiquette and one of the first things he’s ever learned at his training school. Yes, there’s the whole you could die shit, and yes that’s a huge deal. But for some reason, all his instructors also made it a huge fucking deal not to interfere in business talk. Because for some ridiculous reason jeno will never get, rich people can’t stand it when “lower class” people interrupt them. And it makes jeno utterly furious when he just wants to walk over to you and rip that cursed drink out of your delicate, manicured hands.

He waits for a good moment. Any moment. He also forgets how popular you are. Jeno doesn’t want to admit it but it certainly irks him to see so many guys confidently walk up to you as if they think they can even get close to receiving your number. Except, jeno also feels a gratifying amount of satisfaction seeing the look of rejection on their faces just mere seconds later.

Jeno wants to go to you. He also wants to find the dumbass who spiked your drink in the first place, but the fear that you’ll take a sip the second he looks away overpowers him. It seems like there’s never going to be a moment he can jump in, and he contemplates just interrupting your conversation. What would the consequences be?

The split second you turn away from those dumb entrepreneurs or whoever jeno doesn’t care about, to raise that glass to your lips, he practically charges forward, ripping your wrist away and effectively spilling the drink in your hands all over the floor.

Astounded, you look up to see Jeno’s intense stare, breathing heavily. There’s complete silence around you, and luckily only in your proximity did by-passers notice.

Your expression says it all. What the hell?

He clenches his jaw, leaning in. “Spiked,” he mutters. Your eyes widen, and a bazillion thoughts course through your head before you remember where you are.

The people next to you are still just as speechless as you were, and once again you thank your years of practice that have led you to this day.

Your face automatically corrects to your business face and you start laughing, making eye contact with all the bewildered people in front of you. You throw a hand out, pretending to cover your mouth to stifle the laughs.

“It’s my father. Apparently, he gave directions to make sure I didn’t drink tonight.” You smile apologetically to the servants cleaning up the mess.

“I have an important meeting tomorrow,” you add, and the people begin laughing nervously and in relief. “-you know my father,” you quip and the laughter after that seems more relaxed. Crisis averted, you internally pat yourself on the back.

Most of the drink is already spilled all over the ground, but just to seal the deal you smile reassuringly to everyone nearby again before just completely trashing it, dropping the entire glass and all in the trash can without a second thought.

❀

The rest of the night goes by quickly- mainly since you ask jeno to take you home asap, and he quickly obliges. When he drives off, he shifts his gaze over to you. He can’t read the expression on your face as you stare straight ahead at the road.

“Are you okay?”

You exhale, looking at jeno. “Honestly? I have no idea.” A beat passes before you speak up again.

“But thank you for saving my life, again.”

Jeno swallows. He’s familiar with this. You’re doing it. Deflecting.

The sound of your hand slamming against the side of the car door almost makes him jump. He looks at you, concerned. There’s a determined expression he sees on your face, one he hasn’t seen often- if not at all.

“I’m not doing this anymore.”

He almost has a heart attack the moment you say that. “What-“

“I’m done being scared. I’m done pretending I’m okay and that nobody is trying to kill me, and I’m done doing nothing about it.”

You press your lips together. “Jeno,” you state firmly. The car rolls to a slow at the stop sign. “Did you happen to see who it was?”

He bites his lip, almost ashamed. “No. It was a man. Dark styled hair, gray suit. All I got was his backside, I’m sorry y/n.”

“No,” you shake your head. “That’s good. That’s better than nothing. But,” you fidget, wanting to curl up into a ball, “Why would anyone try to do this to me?”

Jeno tilts his head, “Most likely it’s someone trying to get to your father through you. Don’t worry, we’ll report it and find whoever’s behind it if there’s one at all.”

“Right.” Your head falls against the window with a thud. “This is annoying.” Jeno and you share a look, a grin coming up on both of your faces.

“Well, all I can say is that I’m impressed by your cover-up. It’s just like you were a professional actress in a movie. You handled that very well,” he speaks up.

You feel heat creeping up the back of your neck, and you clear your throat. “Thanks,” you mutter. Jeno cocks his head. This isn’t the first time you’ve reacted like this.

He calls your name, and your head shoots up. “yeah?”

“Do you always get this flustered when I compliment you?”

You scoff exaggeratedly, looking anywhere but at jeno’s face. “Yeah, right.” You cringe, your sudden voice crack really did you dirty.

Jeno bites the inside of his cheek to suppress the smile and laughter that so desperately want to bubble out of him.

❀

This is bad. This is very bad.

It seems as if jeno is taking advantage of this newfound weakness against you, and you do not appreciate it one bit. You enjoyed holding the power over him, but now that he can make you become the sweatiest, stuttering mess in the room when you were specifically trained to not do that since you were (basically) born, it makes you wonder if you took it for granted.

“You look pretty today.”

“Your hair smells so nice.”

The one time he called you princess you swear you almost fainted.

And the worst part is?

You have no clue why this occurs. Your body simply reacts without thinking. It makes you want to pull your hair out and keeps you up all fucking night long.

Jeno’s cocky smirk shows up in your nightmares or in reality, dreams.

“Hey, y/n,” he asks one day. You hum in response. “Who’s that one friend of yours that works here?”

You furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “Chaeryeong?”

If you would have bothered to look up, you would have seen the cockiest and most mischievous smile on jeno’s face. “Right, that one. I just thought she was pretty,” he states casually, preparing for your reaction.

Your pen falls flat on the table. Your eyebrow twitches. Three, four, five seconds pass.

“What?” You ask in the quietest, calmest voice Jeno has ever heard since he’s met you.

Was it just him or did the temperature in the room drop three degrees?

He looks so innocent you don’t know if you want to punch him or hug him as a five-year-old would do to a teddy bear. “Hm? I just said she was pretty, that’s all. Right? I mean, she’s your friend.”

“Yeah, right…” you reply, distracted. Jeno counts five seconds, pretending to walk off a little way.

You let out a huge scoff, suddenly scribbling furiously in your notebook like you did the first week you met jeno.

“…are you okay, y/n?”

“Perfectly fine,” you respond with gritted teeth. You weren’t bothered at all. You didn’t care about jeno at all. No, none. Nothing. You don’t care about the fact that jeno and chaeryeong would look so good together and no, you don’t fucking care at all.

You hear small snickers off to the side, and you glare furiously at jeno before he quiets down.

It’s not until you wake up in the middle of the night at 2 am with a horrible pillow head that you realize it.

That fucker’s been doing it on purpose.

Gucci, Prada, Louis Vuitton, name it and Jeno has seen you wear it before. You undoubtedly possessed one of the most extravagant wardrobes with pieces from famous designers all over the world. Decorated with expensive, rare crystals and accessories that probably cost more than jeno’s life and worn all on you like it was nothing.

But it was never like this.

No one can deny your beauty, radiating from every part of you. It’s always been there, only today the clothes you wear make it even more noticeable. Your bold, sleek (and quite revealing) dress paired with sharp high heels. The first thing that catches jeno’s eye is your hair, styled up high so delicately that makes him think it must’ve taken at least 3 hours.

They all make a huge dent in Jeno’s shield.

The whole day he was told that you were busy, and now he suddenly understands why, gulping. “W-where exactly are we going again?”

You smirk, pretending to act innocent although nearly the whole room stares at you in shock. “A cocktail party. I have to meet a potential partner.”

Jeno’s too dumbstruck to ask you what kind of partner (and he later regrets it.)

Alright, so maybe the idea popped in your head soon after your father informed you that a potential business partner was attending the party later today. It gave you an excuse to get dolled up- who doesn’t like to do that every once in a while? Besides, there was no way you would pass up an opportunity to catch jeno off guard.

❀

This strange, foreign feeling that derives from the bottom of his stomach and rises up his throat makes him sick. It forces jeno to want to punch a wall or anyone nearby, and he almost obliges. More than once, the wine glass in his delicate hand almost shatters and he doesn’t drink. Jeno hasn’t, and he most certainly will not, but he’ll accept anything to just ground him, ground him before he does something he’ll definitely regret.

Bodyguards weren’t allowed in private rooms. Jeno can only stand outside the door, pacing back and forth as he tries to identify what this horrid sensation is. The only thing that reaches his ears is the sound of your laughter. Pressing his ear against the door in an attempt to eavesdrop (he was that desperate apparently), produced no results when the only noise was your soft murmurs muffled by the door. Your giggles were ones that he got to hear, not whoever this “potential partner” of yours should even deserve.

It just irks him. That’s it. His worst fears come to light when he recalls this afternoon. You look ready to kill in that attire of yours, and your mention of a partner.

There’s no way…

marriage?

The glass in his hand cracks and it immediately breaks his stupor. He awkwardly places it down before he does any more damage. Anything, jeno does anything ranging from squats to lunges to distract his wild mind. Until finally, the door opens and in a split second, he’s back to his formal self. One man walks out, then another, and finally one last one who waits for you to shake your hand politely before bowing and heading off with the others.

He tries, hard, to pretend he’s unbothered, but his eyes flicking back between you and the leaving men reveal his true intentions. Still smiling, you sigh contently before greeting your bodyguard.

“How,” his voice is gruff and scratchy from not having used it for a while, and he swears your smile grows just the teeniest amount, “how was it?”

You start walking at a casual pace, dress flowing behind you as jeno deftly avoids stepping on it while following. You could get used to this.

“Good.” Suddenly, you turn around to face him. Taking a step closer to jeno creates a ripple effect as he takes a step back, and another one, and another until shit- the wall’s there.

You search jeno’s eyes, unwavering no matter how close your body gets to his. You’re much taller with those heels, jeno notes as he avoids eye contact.

Keeping a distance you deem appropriate between your bodies, you lean the slightest in, and jeno gets a whiff of your sweet perfume- it’s almost sickening as he pleads for his eyes to stay open. Jeno prays that someone walks past the corridor so you’ll step back, give the man some room to breathe, but it seems that he’s out of luck.

Your voice is so full of fake concern, even he can see through it.

“Are you alright?” you look at him from under your eyelashes. His nod is almost indiscernible as you lean in closer, eyebrows furrowed.

“Sure?”

He chokes out a ‘yes,’ and you finally take it, stepping away. You pretend you don’t see his sigh of relief and give him a couple of breather seconds.

“So,” he finally gets out, “who was that?”

You feel giddy. Exiting the party into the chilly night, you shiver before shooting him a look. “No one important. Why? Are you jealous?”

Jeno actually scoffs at that, shoving his hands in his suit pockets. “Yeah, right. I don’t care at all who- but uh, if it’s really a mar-“

You continue walking, allowing the smile to break fully on your face. “It was just a potential business partner for our upcoming exhibition. No need to get jealous, Jen.” He stops walking at that. You can hear the lack of footsteps and turn around, crossing arms to keep in the heat. That’s when jeno notices. His eyes rake over you, and suddenly, the cold doesn’t bother you. Jeno sniffs, looking away as he grumbles, “Then there was no need to wear all that..”

A puff of air leaves your mouth as you laugh, visible in the frosty air. You open your mouth to respond but your lips part without any sound leaving. The feeling of jeno wrapping his suit jacket around you has your blood-chilling even more if that was possible.

“Come on, let’s go home, y/n.” When he receives no response, he turns to find you as still as a statue, staring off into the distance. He squints. Are you blushing?

His hand waving in front of your eyes allows you to unfreeze, jeno’s concerned face coming into focus. “Why is your face red?”

“What?” You jolt, “N-no it isn’t,” you lie, although you quickly start hitting your cheeks as if it would magically will them to stop.

“You know doing that is only going to make it worse,” he remarks, amused.

“Stop being a smartass and drive me home, will you?”

He salutes jokingly. “Anything for the missus,” and you push his shoulder playfully.

❀

It’s nearing the Christmas season. For you to get into the spirit, there’s only one thing that you do every year. An unbreakable rule, a small self pat on the back for all the hard work you’ve done this year.

Of course, it’s splurging-

on yourself.

Jeno rolls his eyes at the sight of you. You couldn’t decide between an orange Hermes bag or a Gucci handbag, so you weigh the two options in front of him, frowning. Both ridiculously expensive that he doesn’t bother looking at them.

“Which one looks better on me?”

“Both.”

You pout, “Come on, I’ve been switching back and forth for two hours now.” You continue, “the orange looks better with my-“

Two hours too many, his eyebrow twitches as he tunes out the rest of your words. Puffing out a breath of exasperation, he pinches his nose ridge. “You look the prettiest, alright? So don’t go asking me anymore because either doesn’t compare to you…” he trails off in frustrated mutters while pinching his nose bridge.

You fall silent.

❀

The gift is held out, a dainty box with a glittering silver bow wrapped around it. While jeno was answering a call, you quickly ran off to the designated store that had been in your sights since the moment you arrived at the shopping centre. Having brought proper disguise to wear this time, you felt safe enough entering without him.

Jeno’s eyes widen in surprise. “What’s this?”

You shrug. “Just something for coming along with me today,” and before he can say anything, you swiftly intercept, “I know you’re forced to since it’s your job, but really.” You glance down at the ground in embarrassment. “It’s a thank you gift, so I won’t allow you to return it.”

He holds the box in his hand, admiring the packaging. Throat dry, he swallows before opening it.

A pristine silver watch presents itself to him, almost mockingly- something he could never afford. Reading the brand, he grasps a rough estimate of the cost, and honestly, jeno can’t expect less from you. It’s beautiful, yes, and he’s been needing a new one for a while now, but…

“Y/n, you know I-“

You raise a hand out to effectively stop him. “None of that. I won’t have any of it.”

He presses his lips together, examining the watch once more as it ticks silently, the sleek finish gleaming against the streetlights. “Okay then,” his voice floats over to you softly, “thank you, y/n.”

“I owe my life to you-”

“You don’t have to thank me. It’s my duty, and… I never want to see you hurt.”

You nod, replying with a tender, “I know.”

And with that, you quickly bid him goodnight with a pacing heart.

❀

Your father calls you early in the morning to his office. You’re greeted by his stern expression, a usual that you’ve come to expect. But what you don’t expect is to see jeno sitting across from you, akin to the first day you met him. The look on jeno’s face makes you stop in your tracks. His hands rest on his knees, hands clasped firmly together as his eyes stare at the floor and the floor only- the unreadable expression makes you frown unconsciously.

Your father calls out your name, and you bow with your gaze still focused on jeno.

“Why… why did you call for me?”

The CEO lets out a long, heaving sigh. “I’ve been thinking. After I found out about your spiked drink at the party three weeks ago, a suggestion was made that we obtain a proper squad -a team of bodyguards- to protect you. Lee Jeno is a fine man,” he pauses to glance at the unmoving silhouette, “but it seems that more protective measures need to be taken.”

You get the underlying message. Everyone knows, Jeno doesn’t work with others. That means replacing- you fucking hate the word- him with a whole squad just to watch over you all the time.

You tense. “What are you implying about Jeno? Are you saying that he can’t protect me? Father, that’s completely absurd. He has been trained-“

“You know very well that’s not what I have said.”

You bite your lip. “And therefore? Jeno has been protecting me since day one, and he will continue to. I allowed you to hire me bodyguard, how much more do you want from me?“ your eyes flicker to jeno. “I put my faith in you to trust Jeno wholeheartedly and have done so. Don’t tell me false lies without thinking of your daughter.”

At that, Jeno is stunned. For once, he looks at your asserted figure, unable to move until you call out his name, instructing him to follow you out of the room. Jeno follows you silently as you cross the hallway into an empty staff room. He patiently waits for you to speak up.

There’s so much you want to say, and no words to put it into effect. You turn around, and he automatically notices the storm brewing in your eyes. That conflicted look makes him want to bury you in his arms. He does.

The wind is knocked out of you, body freezing in his warm embrace. Eventually, your arms come to wrap around his waist. Your head falls to lay on his shoulder, and it feels way too natural to make sense. “Jeno…”

“Y/n.”

“You’re not going. I’m not letting you.” You pull back, letting him see the sincerity in your eyes, and he does, adam’s apple bobbing slightly. Then a certain thought strikes your head, and you quickly release him, embarrassed.

“Unless- you, unless you want to stop being my bodyguard.”

He frowns. “I never said that,” he quirks an eyebrow, and you sigh in relief. He places a hand on your shoulder and you meet his gaze. “Don’t worry y/n, I’ll never leave your side.”

The evident happiness shown in your eyes is enough to make him happy too. Perhaps it’s the new environment you’re placed in or the situation that just occurred, but it’s almost as if a filter was placed over jeno’s eyes when he looks at you. His eyes can follow your every action and he becomes conscious of your remaining warmth that came from being pressed against him. Your outfit, hairstyle, scent, all feel so fresh to him. He wants to shake it off- it’s somewhat overwhelming.

After seeing you stand up for him, stand up against your father, it’s like a switch flipped and there’s absolutely nothing he can do about it.

❀

The long-awaited holiday of the year is coming up, and Jeno soon realized the extent to which he desperately needs to buy gifts. Desperately so, or else his friends would beat him up. Not that they could or he would let them, but jeno’s generally known in the friend group for lagging behind due to his work schedule, and he’s determined to make a difference this year. Jeno doesn’t have much time off- barely any at all, but the one day he does, a sense of loneliness washes over him. The one day he convinces himself to go out to buy presents, the reluctance of being alone stops him and before he knows it, his phone is dialing a number- your name flashing on the screen.

The rush of delight that fills him when you almost immediately agree unnerves him. Before hanging up, jeno quickly reminds you to cover your identity- mask up, wear a hat, do whatever- and you reluctantly comply. You don’t question who or what he’s buying gifts for, you just tag along.

At the crowded shopping plaza, the festive cheer fills the air, and finally, it sets in. Jeno grabs your hand instinctively as you weave through the crowd. You go through a total of six stores until jeno feels satisfied with all his gifts. You helped him pick out an ugly sweater and he swore he’s never laughed harder than at your expressions of surprise and confusion from all the bizarre patterns. "Why do people like to wear these... kinds of clothes?" you wonder out loud, and he bursts out laughing.

Before you leave, there seems to be a band playing celebratory music in the center of the plaza, and you can’t help but drag jeno across to the growing crowd that listens. Finding a good spot near the back of the crowd just for safety measures, you and jeno stand there. He silently watches you bounce along to the music, body swaying back and forth as you listen in glee. Chuckling, he almost glances away until he hears your voice. A strange man stands to the left of you, leaving over to ask you a seemingly harmless question. It really shouldn’t bother Jeno, but an unsettled feeling unnerves him as you answer casually, quiet enough he can’t hear what you said. Still, he stays silent.

That’s when he catches the man’s hand and glint reflecting across the light, the distance between his knife and you decreasing. Instinctively, Jeno lunges forward and grabs your arm to pull you to him quickly as he tries to get between the two of you. It all happens in a split second- in one moment he’s wide-eyed and springing forward and the next he’s gripping onto you tightly, almost shaking your body as he questions you. For a minute he thinks you’re fine, your wide and flustered eyes staring back at him as you hold just as tight onto his tensed arms.

Then he follows your eyes, your very eyes that trail down to your side, and his blood runs cold. He sees the blooming patch of red, and immediately he whips around to find the damned culprit but there’s no one. You stumble, and that’s when Jeno begins to panic, no longer caring as he yells out to the people around you to call for an ambulance.

The last thing you remember before blacking out was jeno’s eyes shining with alarm and distress as he calls out your name.

❀

This may be the first time Jeno’s completely out of his senses. His leg bounces in front of him as he clasps his hands together, praying that you’re okay. The hospital is mainly quiet, the noise dying down after the couple of hours that have passed since you were admitted. Once the sound of footsteps approaches him, he jumps up to see the doctor, waiting with a neutral expression.

You’re going to be okay. You’re alive and well. It was just the situation and sight of blood that must’ve caused you so much shock that you fainted. Fortunately, you were pulled away by jeno enough so that the knife wasn’t able to impale you- jeno nearly gags- but only leave a long scratch that ran across your side. It was enough to keep you in the hospital for a set amount of days, but nothing that would impair you. Jeno isn’t allowed to see you yet, and he goes to testify to the police and your father. It pains him to describe the scene in detail- the sickening man who did that to you, but he finishes one way or another. Jeno knows it’s deeper than this, there’s more to this and he’s had a feeling for a while. All he’s told is that your father is keeping the situation quiet in order not to arouse the public media (although it obviously has) and that a private investigation surrounding the attempted murders is ongoing. Jeno’s left to sit in the cold hospital waiting room, alone with his thoughts and feelings.

He feels the guilt breaking him- he’s the one who made the promise and he couldn’t protect you.

The first time he saw you, his eyes almost well up with tears. No matter how much you’ve been through, how much you’ve suffered- you’re always so strong. Your gentle smile and tired eyes tear his heart even further. Jeno states your name quietly, trudging closer. You pat next to you, implying for him to come closer. Where does he even start?

“I’m so sorry. It was all my fault. If only I had-“

“Why are you apologizing?” You stare at him with an incredulous look, and he blinks.

“What do you mean why? You got stabbed, y/n. I wasn’t fast enough so you got hurt and now you’re here, in the hospital.”

“Are you serious? Or is this some kind of joke?”

Jeno can’t believe it. Was it the medication making you loopy? “You’re hurt. I couldn’t even do my job properly and he was right there-,” he clenches his fists and lowers his face in regret.

Your warm hand placed on top of his gets him to shut up. He looks up and sees your tiny smile, hidden with a secret emotion he can’t discern. “Jeno,” you say.

“Stop looking at this,” you gesture to your wound, “and start looking at this.” You open your arms wide, showing you in all your glory- including the dumb hospital gown and iv drip attached to your arm. Your eyes soften. “You saved my life, and I’m only here because of you. Think of how much worse it could have been,” you press and he doesn’t say anymore or want to imagine anything more.

“Okay, y/n. Just please forgive me for breaking your trust. You put your faith in me and-

You roll your eyes stubbornly. “I forgive you, now please stop with that depressing talk. I’m completely fine and honestly more irritated at the fact that I have to stay here confined while everyone gets to do exciting stuff.”

“Chaos happening at the office because of your almost death isn’t exciting- at least, I don’t find it to be,” he jokes, finally feeling the mood lighten. You scoff.

Your father spending most of the time conferring with the police and media sources instead of visiting you at least once could mean more or less to you at this point.

He scoots his chair closer to your hospital bed. “You’re not… bothered by him? It’s like your own father and only family doesn’t even care for your safety, just the public’s opinion on the company.”

You manage a tiny shrug in order not to mess with your stitches. “That’s just how it is when your father is the CEO of the largest shareholding company in the country.” You look down to fiddle with your fingers. “Besides, I don’t know what I’d do if he did care.”

That’s when Jeno realizes how alone you are. You have friends but they have their own appointments. You have family but they never visit. Jeno resolves to make up for all of the absences in your life.

❀

You’re surprised by how much Jeno stops by and keeps you company at the hospital. Without fail, he brings snacks or random stories every visit. He’s not officially on duty since you’re restricted to the hospital, but he still tells you the happenings at the office, or which two workers have been revealed to be secretly dating (and every time you clap your hands together and yell “I knew it!”), or sweet messages from co-workers that aren’t able to visit you in person. And, the update on the case. They got the guy who stabbed you- the same one who tried to poison you that one night, and it makes Jeno feel a little better. For now, the motive is just trying to get to the CEO by using you and he hopes the police stick with it.

“You know,” you speak up one afternoon, “you don’t have to be here. This is the perfect opportunity for you to get a break from being my bodyguard and seeing me 24/7.” The look Jeno sends you in response effectively shuts you up.

On the days you force him not to come in or he’s reached the maximum limit of visiting you for the week- stupid, he knows- he sends you messages that leave a smile on your face and your heart fluttering.

❀

Well, this a certainly a predicament you would have never thought to find yourself in. Jeno’s foot taps the floor in a random beat as he recounts the drama that occurred at the office today. Your eyes keep slipping towards the simple clock on the wall, and you feel your palms grow increasingly clammy. Jeno, of course, takes note of this. You always listen intently to his stories, so the one time he feels the absence of your gaze on him, he knows something is wrong.

“What is it?”

You almost jump. “Huh?”

He purses his lips together, “Something’s bothering you.” Internally, you debate the consequences of revealing the issue. Would you regret this? And then you remember you have almost been murdered multiple times. This one thing couldn’t possibly kill you, right?

You take a deep breath. “The nurse said that today, I could finally change into my normal clothes and you know how much I hate wearing this stupid hospital gown.” You bite your lips and jeno’s eyes subconsciously follow the action. “But it’s four o’clock and she still hasn’t come in to help me so… couldyoupossiblyhelpmetakethisoff?”

As if realizing what you just said out loud, you shoot your gaze to the nearby window in the room, heat filling your body. Silence permeates the room and you so desperately wish you could reverse time and keep your damn mouth shut. Why, of all times, do most hospital gowns not have zippers, and the one you’re currently wearing does?

“You know what, forget-“

“Okay.”

You speak at the same time. You whip towards him. His ears are flushed red as he avoids your gaze awkwardly.

“I-I won’t look, I’ll-“

You blink, a sudden feeling of helplessness rising within. “I know. I can’t reach it because of my stitches so can- can you just unzip the…”

“Y-yeah, I got it.”

You hold your breath as he approaches you, fingertips delicately placed near the top of your back. His hands hesitate before softly reaching for the zipper, pulling down slowly. You can feel the coldness of his fingers seep into your back but you grit your teeth and mention nothing, heart pounding.

“I promise I’m not looking anywhere like that,” he mutters while zipping it down further. You reassure him that it’s fine before shivering when his cold fingers come in contact with your bare shoulder to help take the gown off. There’s this sudden urge to turn around to face him, but it’s practically impossible in your current state, so you close your eyes instead and focus on your breathing. He stills for a second, but his eyes can’t help but slowly get pulled into your wound now in plain view, and he swallows. Luckily, most of your body is covered still by the gown, but he still sees the broad amount of smooth skin that wasn’t attacked or worked on.

Jeno whispers a soft, “I’m done.”

The door clicks open noisily and your heads both whip towards the source of the sound. A nurse stands there, one hand on the clipboard and another still on the door handle, observing the scene.

“It’s not-“

“I wasn’t doing anything, I…“ he splutters.

Excuses and explanations fill the air until eventually Jeno feels it’s best to leave and he practically dashes out of the room. You can only sit there, astounded.

The nurse clears her throat, “Well then, I guess I’ll finish helping you change.” You nod wordlessly.

“Is he your boyfriend?”

You jump and it stretches your stitches, causing a wince to erupt out of you as the nurse calms you. “Oh my, I didn’t mean to startle-“

“It’s fine,” you mumble distractedly, apparently more preoccupied with the aforementioned thought. Does jeno look like your boyfriend? Has the media noticed and misunderstood? Was there even something to misunderstand about?

❀

December 25. AKA, Christmas Day.

You receive the green light from the doctors to go home. After expressing your uttermost gratitude to the doctors and nurses that took care of you, you feel the rising excitement at the prospect of finally returning home. You get to see your grandmother who wasn’t able to visit with duties at your penthouse and all your friends consumed by work.

And there was one other person. The one that you wanted to see the most, but you sent him home. It was Christmas- there was absolutely no way you would make him work, forced to stay next to you the whole day. (although, he wouldn’t be complaining, and neither would you.) You remember commanding him to stay home the night before, Christmas Eve, and celebrate with whoever he wanted. No matter how pleased you were when he protested, you make him promise to not worry about you and enjoy the day off.

“It’s Christmas, Jen.”

“Yes, but…”

“Go home and stop worrying so much- at least for one day, okay?” Your thumb softly smooths out his furrowed brow. “For me?”

Reluctantly, he responds, “Fine. As long as you promise to text me tomorrow night.”

You beam. “Of course, I promise.”

On the other side of town, Jeno checks his phone anxiously. He swears his anxiety (or possible separation issues?) has never been this bad.

“Dude, how many times are you gonna check your phone?” Haechan snorts, jumping over the couch to plop down next to him. “Every time it goes off you’re scrambling for it like you’re in the Hunger Games or whatever.” He slides even closer, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively, and jeno grimaces.

“Could it be," he taps his chin cheekily, "your secret girlfriend?”

When jeno’s ears turn red and he doesn’t respond, haechan’s eyes grow wide, contrary to Jen’s belief. “No way, is it actually? I was just joking but-“

“Leave him alone,” Mark shakes his head helplessly. “It's probably his work- you know he’s always on call. Give him a break,” mark finishes while leaving haechan to splutter and jeno to heave a sigh of relief.

Although jeno agrees with you, it was nice to finally see his friends and have a day off while celebrating Christmas, he can’t help but wonder what you’re up to. How are you? Are you home now? Are you alone- who’s celebrating with you? Is he the only one thinking this much about you?

Hours later, jeno finally returns home before midnight. His excuse to his friends? He had to wake up early tomorrow to work. Lame, yes, but he needed to see you. He exhales, finally in solitude after spending the whole day with his rowdy friends. Throwing his jacket on the couch, he lays on the bed before taking out his phone.

His stomach flips- two unread messages from you.

[11:38 pm] you: Hey jen

[11:38 pm] you: How was your Christmas?

[11:40 pm] jeno: it was good!

He sighs while typing out a response, before shaking his head and backspacing to write another.

[11:42 pm] jeno: are you free

[11:42 pm] you: Right now?

[11:42 pm] jeno: uh

[11:43 pm] jeno: yeah

If any bystander were to see the scene in front of them, they would almost believe it was a clip playing from a k-drama. Jeno smiles shyly, giggling at his phone as if he was a teenager talking to their crush.

[11:46 pm] you: Yeah, I’m free ❤️

Jeno gasps audibly, placing a hand on his chest as he lights up like a little child. No way, you sent a heart?

[11:46 pm] you: Sorry!

[11:46 pm] you: That was a typo…

He quite visibly deflates at your text. He presses his lips together in a thin line while his fingers briskly move across the screen.

[11:47 pm] jeno: then ill see you outside your place in 5 min?

[11:48 pm] you: Sure ❤️

Beaming at your next message, he throws his phone haphazardly somewhere while getting ready as fast as possible, scrambling all over his apartment.

[11:48 pm] you: That wasn’t an accident this time ;)

His breath floats away from him in the cold air, coming out in visible puffs while he runs towards your apartment building. It’s never once felt that long of a walk with you, but now it seems as if it stretched on for miles.

His legs come to a stop once he sees your figure just feet away. It’s far enough that you could barely shout to each other, but enough to see the expression on your faces. A wide split grin, eye-smiles, sparkling pupils, cheeks protruding so much it hurts.

It’s been a while. It’s taken a while, too. Jeno finally sees you. He finally sees your rarity-the one lone, twinkling star in the sky- and he never wants to lose it. The time it’s taken to build up the courage over fear is uncertain, but the sight of you in a matching set of purple pajamas with cute designs printed all over and is that his suit jacket that you’re wearing? Either way, he’s certain he can’t hold it back anymore (and probably couldn’t for much longer).

“I don’t think I can run right now,” you call out, and he laughs from his spot. Jeno looks on as you hold your arms open wide, so welcomingly, and he runs.

Right as he reaches you, he purposefully slows to embrace you in a gentle hug without hurting you.

“Welcome back, y/n,” he murmurs into your hair. You squeeze tighter, inhaling his comforting scent. Pulling back after a couple of moments, jeno looks down at your choice of outfits. “Wow,” he breathes, “you look beautiful.”

You raise an eyebrow. “In my pajamas?” He nods. “Of course.”

You look away, face burning, but the white powdery substance falling onto your face grabs your attention. Your head shoots up, as you look on delightedly. “Jeno! Look!”

He can only stare at you admiring the snowfall with a red nose and bright, twinkling eyes. You glance towards him, catching him in the middle of staring at you. You call his name out. Jeno bites his lip, taking one of your hands. Your face turns to one of confusion at the sudden change of atmosphere.

“Y/n.”

“Yeah?” He pulls you closer, taking in a deep breath before looking into your eyes.

“You mean a lot to me. Like, a whole fucking lot.”

Your eyes widen. Alarmed at the sudden confession, you bring your two cold hands up to hold his face, searching his eyes with a question hidden on your tongue.

On impulse, jeno leans in, capturing your lips in a kiss. At first, you can’t move, only noting the warm and foreign sensation on your lips. Then it hits you.

Why aren’t you pushing him away? …why doesn’t it feel wrong?

At the lack of a response, jeno pulls back. You stare at each other for a second before he opens his mouth to say something, and you cut him off.

“Kiss me again,” you command, and he enthusiastically does. His arms wrap around you as you grip the sides of his jacket in your cold fingers, allowing warmth to envelop you both inside and out. The taste of his lips on yours becomes addicting, and you force yourself to stop.

Breaking part, you share bashful smiles. Jeno swallows.

“Merry Christmas, y/n. I didn’t really think about getting you a gift but….” he trails off.

You giggle, “Merry Christmas, and me neither.” You beam at each other, the unspoken feelings shared between you two.

“How do you feel?” Jeno asks, bringing you close to him as he admires the tiny snowflakes resting on your eyelashes.

Although it’s freezing outside, and there’s a big fat chance you could get caught by paparazzi right now, you could care less. You can’t help but reply with a tiny smile,

“i think i’m okay right now.”

p.s. there will be an epilogue released jan 28 ;))

#cznnet #lee jeno x reader #jeno x reader #nct dream x reader #nct dream x you #nct dream imagines #nct dream au #jeno scenarios #lee jeno imagines #jeno smut #nct u x reader #jeno fluff #nct dream fluff #nct dream scenarios

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blossom-rea · 3 years ago

Text

when we meet again | lee jeno

PAIRING~ deity/demon/inmortal!Jeno × fem!reader, computer science major!Jeno x art major!reader

GENRES ~ angst, fluff, past life lovers to strangers to friends to lovers, collegelau, reincarnation!au, fantasy!au, memory loss

WARNINGS ~ cuss words, mentions of death, major character death(past-life), mention of snakes?? this is barely proofread and it’s kinda rush I’m so sorry if you see something else that should be here let me know

SUMMARY~ Jeno hates the feeling of emptiness he's been having for almost 3000 years, being immortal was supposed to be funny but he can't remember anything from his past and how long will it take for his curse to end, what he knows is that Jaemin has been keeping secrets from him, and that every time he sees you he keeps dreaming about a life that has long been forgotten.

WORD COUNT ~ around 17k

TAGLIST ~ @keemburley @chitaphrrrr @neocuddlytechnology @bockhyun @blank-velvet

AUTHOR'S NOTE > hi!! this'll be my first time writing for the neos so tysm for checking it out, this is loosely based on the animated film "White Snake" and it's part of @aehyei Valentines Gone Wrong collab. hope you enjoy it, feedback is highly appreciated. Also english is my second language please keep that in mind and sorry for any inconvenience or if something is off

do not translate or repost

1. a little advice

before

It was cold, the whistling of the air broke the silence inside the cottage where he was lying, he couldn't remember going to bed, he couldn't remember anything. Who was he? What was he doing there? and why does he feel the need to hide?

Suddenly someone barges inside the hut, an old lady with a kind smile comes to him

“I see you're finally awake”

“Who are you? Where am I?”

“I was hoping you'll tell me the answer to the first question, as for the second, you're in our village, you fell down the waterfall and Shua found you, she was the one who brought you here”

“Shua?” he's so confused right now but the lady just nods

“Everyone said you weren't going to make it but here you are. Come with me, the others will arrive soon and Shua it’s with them ” as he follow the old lady around he could see many houses there hanging up rocks connected to another by numerous wood bridges, once they hit the ground he could see kids running around some men guarding the wall and a few others making what look like baskets

As they got closer to the wooden gates he could hear what sounded like a cart and voices overlapping over a faint hissing sound

“They returning from the hunting” the lady explain eyeing him carefully “you could make a really good snake-catcher if train” he felt shivers down his spine, the mere thought of it making him feel uneasy, as if wrath was boiling inside him for no apparent reason

“Have you been meeting our Shua in secret?” the lady inquired

“What?” the sudden question made him halt “I… I haven't, I do-on’t know her”

“That’s good, her father doesn't like you” she looks straight ahead “here they come”

He could see a group of people, coming inside the gates, all wearing the same kind of gear and, in the cart filled with baskets, there was her

now You had always wondered why in a world where magic had always been real people were so scared of it.

Many years ago people that had powers were a few but more common, unlike nowadays where those who had been blessed were so rare that people could not believe it, and it meant that even if they did have some sort of power they'll rather hide it, and it was exactly that what made the little shop at the end of one of the alleys downtown so enticing, many would talk about it, visiting in hopes they'll find what they've been looking for but none of the old habitants would dare say they've been there at least once.

Your mother had always been honest with you so you weren't surprised when she admitted she had visited the shop many times, she even had to get a lecture about your future before your birth but she had never told you what she heard and you were never brave enough to ask or to visit the shop by choice, it wasn't like you believed in that stuff to begin with but you rather not fill your mind with unwanted thoughts

"Where are you taking me?" You ask Haechan as he guides you through all the maze-alike streets, the more you walk the more the little shops start to appear, a little cafe hidden behind an old building or the flower shop next to the most boring travel agency ever seen, it's not that you're curious about your destination but Haechan has a way to get himself into the most unexpected things you just want to be ready

"I told you we're going to Renjuns workplace a little further from here," he says as he continues walking never letting go of your arm "he's in this shop they all talk about, the one with fortune telling which is what we are doing today" except you don't exactly want to have someone telling you your future "And why exactly are we doing that? Besides I know Renjun likes to believe in aliens and stuff but all this palm reading or whatever doesn't sound much like him

"Fortune-telling" he corrects you

"They don't need your palms for that and I know it doesn't sound like him but he isn't the one doing them"

“Still this sounds like a lot of bullshit" you roll your eyes of all the things he wants to get into, it had to be this "Look, I know it doesn't sound legit but Johnny came here because he's been wanting some guidance and said it actually helped him" you think of Mark's older brother coming all the way to this place but that too is something that he would do. As you come inside you notice the sign that reads "The Precious Jade", the shop is decorated with beautiful flowers here and there, drawers up to the ceiling, multiple tapestries, and the unmistakable smell of incense. You can see two people behind the counter, one is Renjun and the other he soon introduces as Ten, his boss and the owner of the shop.

"It's good to see you again" he says with a smile that seems to hide way too much

“How are you the owner? Is it new or..?" Haechan interrupts before you get a chance to ask where does he know you from

“Oh no it's been mine since the beginning, a couple of years ago now” the fact that he doesn't look older than twenty-five and has been owning the shop for a while now shocks you

‘'Whatever" is all Renjun says

"Yeah well okay. we're here for some future telling" Haechan speaks up before someone else says anything

"Future telling? I could offer you something else, something more exciting actually" the way Ten mischievous smiles makes you wonder what exactly can he have that'll interest your friend more than the future, but before you can question him you hear someone scoff, turning to the dark blue curtain you see another guy with black hair and wearing round glasses

"More exciting, he says" he shakes his head

"You shouldn't go around making such offers Ten, remember what happened last time"

"How to forget? I almost got killed after that one" you hear Renjun laughing while Haechan looks just as puzzled as you, the new guy turns to you with a little smile

“If you're interested in your future I'm the one for that, my name's Kun" you returned his smile but shake your head

"Oh it's not for me" you make sure to talk loud and clear but Haechan dismisses your words

"Yes, for her please, we want to know about her future, will she find love soon? Perhaps a soulmate?" You're not even sure what surprises you more that your friend is asking in your name about your love life or the soulmate's question, who even believes in that? But you just sigh and follow them behind the curtain deciding that the faster you end with it the better, after all, you have nothing to lose.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Jeno hated the shop, as years passed by he had managed to befriend the owner and the others that started working there but he hated how every time he was there he had the urge to ask Kun about his future as if it’ll ever change, he didn't know what he was waiting for, who he was expecting, all he knew was something was coming his way.

But today Kun wasn't there and he was running some errands for his forever roomie Jaemin, who was busy writing an article for the school's newspaper or so was his excuse.

“Have you been in the forest?” Sicheng questions him, everyone knows he avoids going to the forest but since he was the only one in the shop, plus he enjoys how serene the older demon was, he decided to be honest with him

“I went there” there as in the pagoda at the dark end of the forest, the place he always finds his way to, he sees Sicheng's wide eyes “I stayed outside all the time don't worry, but this time it felt different” he isn't sure why, he knows it has something to do with him and his useless memory but since he can’t remember, it doesn’t really matter, that's why after leaving that place he had hoped to find Kun here, he wanted to ask something he had thought for a fleeting moment standing outside of the temple

“You know I can't really talk to you about that” the tall boy behind the counter reminded him but he knows; that was part of his sacrifice, after all, giving up his memory as payment for whatever he had wanted. the thing is, it doesn’t matter what it was anymore cause he cannot remember and can do nothing about it,

“I don't want to talk about that, Sicheng, I'm just here for Jaemin's incense” Jeno tries to change the subject, to avoid getting a headache, he still needs to finish some code before Monday classes, for a moment he wishes he had chosen journalism as Jaemin had done, instead of electing for computer science but it was a little too late now, and after seeing Jaemin almost go nuts after writing over and over again the same note he decided computers were by far his thing

“You know, Haechan came by the other day” Jeno perks up at that mention of his teammate “what did he want?” He knew Haechan’s curiosity was incredibly vast but even after talking about the shop, and Renjun working there, he had never shown interest in coming over to lurk

“Nothing for him apparently, he came by with a girl, Renjun said she's a friend of theirs” the demon shrugs “either way he was asking about this girls future, something about love and soulmates I think” Sicheng moves around picking the particular smells Jaemin likes for his incense starting to pack them

“Soulmates?” he knows people often come to ask about their futures but it seems very odd for someone to ask about soulmates not to mention even believe in them

“That’s what he asked, she looked pretty much bored though but she was really kind, she’s the Y/N Renjun always talks about” Jeno has heard about you but he’s never actually meet you

“Did they get what they wanted?” He’s not sure why he’s asking that

“I guess, Haechan looked happy and Y/N more annoyed than anything, understandable since it wasn’t her idea, but yeah they bought some candles too; here you go” he hands him the package and Jeno hurries to pay for it, bidding goodbye he exits the shop with a neatly packed bag and thoughts of soulmates flooding his mind

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“I can’t believe you went and played with magic like that!” you understood why Mark was so against it but his reaction was still a bit overboard, you were at McDonald’s a couple of days after your session with Kun who was very kind to answer every question Haechan had come up with

“I’m telling you is not magic, Kun said there are various methods, this one in question includes the constellations, your birthdate and some other considerations” Johnny rolls his eyes and you don’t know if it’s better because now his little brother is looking at him with a betrayed expression in his face

“I swear to god Johnny! If mom finds out she’s having your head, and mine too if she finds out I knew” Haechan mocks him on the side “and you shut up! I can still go and spill to your mom”

“I wasn’t even the one who get the answers, it was all for Y/N’s sake” Haechan complains

“You’re the one who took her there, and what do you mean for her sake? What was it that you even wanted to ask?”

You sigh, the main reason why Haechan took you there was because he wanted to find you a new boyfriend, he wanted guidance for you to find what he called ‘your soulmate’ you just thought he had seen too many rom-coms for your liking

“Well I'll have you know I'm helping Y/N find a new boyfriend” the way he said it, so proud of himself drags a laugh out of everyone on the table making him look around him disbelief and slightly offended

“Why would she need help with that?” Johnny laughs and you grinned at him, he has always been your favorite for a reason

“Because she isn’t even trying to begin with, plus it’s been ages since she had a boyfriend” you know what they’re all thinking but decide to stay quiet instead

“I know…” Mark starts “ that it’s been a while since she broke up with Soobin but I don’t think she needs to date someone if she doesn’t want to Haechan” he looks directly at your friend “I know you mean well but you shouldn’t be bugging her about that“

It was true that it had been a while since you’ve been on a date, after dating Soobin for almost 4 years you had been set on a couple of blind dates by some friends or accepting when someone asked you out but soon enough you had decided you needed a break, what you couldn't exactly understand was why Haechan was so against your ex, it wasn't like the break-up had been bad, you both had decided to part ways and remain friends, no hard feelings, you even see him from time to time and text regularly, and it had been that way for more than a year now, so why was this sudden urge to get you out in the dating scene, it wasn't like you didn't want to, after all, you were keener to date now, but the only one you had talked with was Yuqi and they were not particularly close for her to out you.

You see your friends get into a discussion whether it is too much or not to meddle in your love life and think back to what Kun had told you once Haechan had exited the room “your lover will come sooner than expected, you'll have no getaway but you have to remember whether you'll stay together or not it's up to you, it has always been up to you” if you had no getaway how could you decide, it was so confusing, you also had the feeling that you were missing something, as if you had met them before, so many questions and just a few answers, you can feel your head starting to hurt, it’s going to be a long semester

before

“What exactly is it that you study?” He asks curiously, Shua just shrugged

“The stars, esoteric arts, medicine, I combine herbs according to their benefits and how they’ll work depending on the sickness”

It’s been a couple of days since he woke up in the village, now she’s taking him to the place she found him

“How did you learn all that?, isn’t it a lot to memorize all these herbs and what they do, I feel like I could not do it” Shua laughs at his words

“I guess it’s kind of hard but we have everything written down, it’s something that’s been in our family for generations, we use them and update when needed, so I learned from my mother and she learned from her mother and so on” as they keep walking and talking he feels infatuated by her, he’s heard a lot about her from her grandma and from the people in the village, all of those she’d help, the ones that love her, he wonders how someone can be so kind, he doesn’t even remember his name now but he’s sure he’s never done half of what she has.

“It was there right below the waterfall” she announces when they arrive, her finger pointing someplace in between the rocks a couple of meters above the ground “I was in my cabin when I heard Du duo barking when I got there your clothes were all wet and you were passed out, I managed to take you down here and mended your injuries, after that, I send Du duo for help and they brought a cart, Nan said she’ll keep you in her house after my dad refuse”

He looks all the rocks above him unsure of the little voice telling him that he needs to climb up that he’s missing something, that he had something to do instead of whatever he’s doing right now

“I’ll go up” he decides, Shua turning to him

“What? No! You’re still recovering you wouldn’t survive if you fall a second-time mister”

“I’ll be fine” to Shua’s disbelief he jumps and lands smoothly on the rock above, surprising both of them

“You didn’t say you were capable of using magic!”

“I swear I didn’t know!” They both laughed

now

Everyone knows Na Jaemin is, besides a journalism student, part of the school’s newspaper, well known at the campus for his kind yet reserved personality he was loved by pretty much everyone around him. Despite him being a friend of your friends you had never have the chance to talk to him not even when you had seen him at the hockey matches he always attended whether he was writing a note or just to support his friends so when he came looking for you after your last class of the day asking if you could answer some questions about the upcoming exhibit that the art department was having at the end of the month, you had said yes and proceeded to spend your whole afternoon answering his questions until you ended up with him dropping you off at your dorm after he offered; a couple of days later when the next hockey match arrive you had bumped into him at the entrance of the ice rink and seeing you were there alone, since Yuqi couldn’t go along with you, he had invited you to sit with him in the bleachers closer to the ice rink so you spend the next hour and half on his right side while he explained to you and Renjun everything you didn’t understand about the game, you finally left the place with a little further knowledge in hockey and a new friend.

2. a face in the crowd

Jaemin always had a way to convince people to do things

Of all the things Jeno would have rather do on a Saturday morning he was walking into the amusement park just because both Mark and Jaemin had decided they wanted to celebrate their birthdays together there, which was funny because as immortal beings Jaemin and he didn’t have a birthday until his friend decided he wanted one for himself and gave him one too

Jeno wasn’t against going at all, but he didn’t feel like dealing with any of his friends' banter before noon, however, he should have known something worse was awaiting him.

When they arrived the park was dead empty just a few workers here and there ad people slowly filling up the park, to everyone’s surprise Mark and Haechan were late and with every passing second he was growing madder

“I think we should go and buy some tickets for all so we can just go in the lines later” Jaemin suggested watching his old friend grumpy face, he knew Jeno was mad because he had woken him up earlier than he ever would, Renjun could sense his mood too so he agrees with him as soon as the words left his mouth making Jaemin find his way to the ticket booth as fast as possible

“Why are they taking so long, they said they were out of the house at least half an hour ago and it’s not even that far” Jeno couldn’t wait to see his friends and smack their asses

“They went to pick up Y/N” Renjun explains as if he would care, he doesn’t like this Y/N and he doesn’t want to meet her now that she has made them wait almost an hour, an hour gone to waste.

as if on cue he can hear Haechan’s voice calling for them but he doesn’t turn, he would get to them eventually, when your trio finally meets them, he’s great by Haechan’s enthusiasm in the form of a hug, it is in that moment that Jeno sees your face for the first time, a concerned look on it with a frown and guilty eyes and plump lips that hold an apology he doesn’t want right now so before you can say anything he does

“Jaemin is getting us some tickets”

He makes sure to get himself out of Haechan’s grip and walks straight to Mark, out of everyone in their friend group Mark’s his favorite, always so calm and kind Mark has a way with words he will only dream of, he’s in such peace with himself Jeno often finds himself gravitating towards him, as he talks with him, Renjun finds a way to entertain you as Haechan is now on his back nodding to everything he says but before he knows it you are taken by slender arms pulling you to a back hug surprising Jeno in ways he can’t explain, Jaemin has always been affectionate but never has he seen him being that way towards a girl

For thousands of years, Jaemin had avoided forming any type of bond with people, of course, he had always been more friendly than him, but it wasn’t until recently that he open up to other people besides Jeno, however, he had always said he had seen what love could do and he didn’t want to test it, Jeno had wondered what exactly was that he had done to make Jaemin believe love was not worth it, after all, he knew he had lived love once and yet he couldn’t remember how it felt, seeing Jaemin’s arms around you, both of you smiling so wide made his heart clench in a way he never imagined and yet it made him wary of you, ignoring your presence throughout the day, after they introduced you, it wasn’t until everyone was arguing whether to have dinner out or go straight to Mark’s apartment that you stood next to him

“They always find a way to argue over simple things don’t you think” your voice was so soft and yet he had seen you manage Haechan on a whim

“They all have way too much passion inside them” he turned to look at you “especially your best friend” he motioned to Haechan who’s so into it that is speaking at a faster speed than usual, moving his hands everywhere, you laugh

“I wouldn’t have him any other way” your smile so warm looking over the boy “anyways I’ll like to apologize for making you guys wait earlier today, Haechan did say something about leaving early but I had pulled an all-nighter the day before so I overslept, I’m sorry” you do look sorry but he only nods at your words, seemingly satisfied with it you walk to your friends taking the car keys out of Haechans pocket

“We’re having pizza at Tony’s tonight, Channie” the boy looks at you in disbelief “that’s what Mark and Jaemin want, next time you can choose let’s go”

“Not so fast Y/N give me those keys!” but you’re way too far to care

“If you guys want a ride you better hurry, I won’t wait for anyone!” As you shout and Haechan trails behind you bickering, the rest of the group shudder and start following your steps.

That night Jeno went straight to bed after he arrived home from dinner, only to wake up hours later after a dream that still clouded his mind, your face surrounding his thoughts and a name in the tip of his tongue he didn’t recall knowing.

before

There was an attempted murder against the General, his soldiers were looking for him but he couldn’t remember if he was truly the one who attempted to commit the crime, he had remembered someone telling him that sometimes things just have to be done, he was sent on a mission but now all he had was a broken memory, a hairpin and the name of the shop that made it, Shua had heard about this place she had decided to accompany him through his journey, but the more they traveled the more he doubted himself, what if he was a bad person? Will he be worthy of her kindness?

“You know you shouldn't trouble with me right? After all, we don’t know what kind of person I am” he asks just to make sure

“I may not know yet, but I know you’re not evil” Shua’s faith in him was outstanding

They hadn't talked much after that, she had found an old boatman who was parting in the same direction as them, he had let them sail the boat with him, singing old songs while they travel down the river

“Still no memory?” Shua asked, he only shook his head “I can’t imagine how it must be not knowing yourself, where you’ve been, what you’ve done” a pause “but then again, there's a lot that's better off forgotten” she turns to look at him “Sometimes you look the wrong way and suddenly seasons change and our lives are gone, since they’re short but our sorrows long, so might as well just focus on the good things” she lets out a small laugh “your fate may be set in stone but how you live is not” he feels his heart warm, as both of them stay sitting side by side, he thinks he wouldn’t care not remembering who he is if it'll mean he'll get to stay with her

“You know it's like the song says “Why bother with earthly affairs when life is just a dream,” he thinks about her words and the meaning behind them

“You are right, but even if life is just a dream to have moments like this (shared with you) is worth it”

As they keep traveling through the mountains he feels more and more attached to her presence and wishes things weren’t as they are

“I'm a mysterious man, with unknown magic, I could either be a human or a demon” his words make Shua turn to him

“Do you think you are one?” her question renders him speechless “I mean, they all say they come in different shapes and sizes and they feed on the marrow and blood of humans, how could you be one? and even if you are a demon, so what?”

His words have turned to be right when they were attacked by another demon, who had accused him of treason, he had turned his body, legs for a tail and fought the other men, he had grown cold from within after that, failing to keep himself awake he had passed out

Shua had built a fire to keep him warm, holding him while he was unconscious, she had never left his side, hugging him until he woke up.

now

“I saw you have new friends” Yuqis words take you out of your daze, you're currently at your apartment living room trying to cram your way through the topics for your upcoming exam, Yuqi is an old friend and roommate, you look at her from your place in the floor asking her to elaborate

“I passed by your table at the library before, saw you with those two cuties” she’s smirking, you know what she’s on about but decide to ignore her tone and implications

“Jaemin said he couldn’t concentrate and needed pear pressure, and Jeno came following along I guess” truth is your friendship with Jaemin had blossomed in a way you hadn’t expected but, even though you had seen Jeno multiple times, he always seemed reluctant to be near you, you try to not give that much thought, despite that and your not related majors, you have found a way to study all together in the library before you had to leave for your afternoon class

“Sure, sure; well I’m starving. Can you take a break and eat dinner together? I’ll order us some food” that's rich coming from the saving queen herself, the both of you indeed enjoy cooking, but to her, it’s just utterly happiness following her strict saving policy

You nod and wait until she’s back from her shower telling you food it’s on its way

“By the way, how’s the search for the love of your life going?” you laugh at her words, ever since the little visit to the shop Haechan had been more than eager to set you up in more than one blind date with his friends, even after you declined those he kept coming offering you every day someone different.

“I don’t think it’s stopping any time soon” you sigh “I’m considering taking his offer tho, do you know Osaki Shotaro?”

“I know him! He’s that foreign student in the dance department, he’s such a cutie a saw him dancing the other day” you had seen him too, it was a small showcase from the dance department that had taken place a few days ago and it was open to everyone who wanted to see, you were dragged there by Renjun since he befriended said guy and wanted to go to support him, he was talented and you could see why everyone was head over heels for the boy, but now Haechan had, somehow, befriended Shotaro too and he had as he said ‘put in a word’ for you and now was trying to get you to accept a date with him

“Haechan knows him and wants me to go on a date with him” Yuqi turns to look at you

“He what? He’s hasn’t even spend a year here” you hum

“That’s what I said, I talked to him the day of the showcase, since Renjun is friends with him too, he’s nice but I don’t think I want to try out with him”

“I can’t believe Renjun is his friend, he’s too cute for a meanie like him” you push her arm

“Renjun is not mean! He’s nice and sweet” you defend your friend

“To you probably, I swear to god he always finds a way to get on my nerves, the other day he saw some of my drawings for class, I need to prepare for a full pictorial and he said those were ass” you know Yuqi has been under a lot of stress by this assignment but you can’t help to think Renjun is right, her drawings are really bad and she’s always graded badly for it even if the final result is beyond your imagination

“I mean, your sketches are pretty bad Yuqi, but I know you’re trying and you can make art with your hands just not on paper”

“Thank you! Some appreciation is needed but he just comes criticizing me, I pray for his future girlfriend” you don’t mention anything about the last bunch because even after almost four years they’ll never accept they like each other and you’re not going to start that discussion again, so you just wait and see who will confess first.

before

“You are here! I thought you left without saying goodbye” those were her words when she had found him sitting by the door of the temple that had guarded them, he had intended to do so, leave without saying goodbye

“I have a tail, now we know, I am a demon”

“Does it matter?” her question surprised him “there are too many bad people who have feet? What’s wrong with having a tail?” her acceptance matter, even after knowing, after seeing him kill another demon, she still accepted him, she still wanted to help him, she had held his hand, and they had walked together until they spotted the little shop, once they open the door they were received by two little men clad in tunics and another one with fancy clothes, the grin on his face inviting, the look in his eyes knowing

“I see you’ve come again, is there any issue with your artifact?” his question’s directed at him, but he's at loss for words

“we’ll like to know more about it” the face of the men quickly changing for the one of a fox, his nose scenting Shua, a wider grin on his face

“You reek of demon yet you are a human, tell me, were you close with a demon lately?” he lets out a mocking laugh changing his face back again “follow me” both of them follow the men through the doors behind the entrance

“All the demons in the area come to the Jade workshop when they need personal artifacts, we specialize in forging artifacts for demons, and I'm the owner of the shop” another smile throw their way “name’s Ten” they follow him through what looks like a pond before it turns around with them in it, pulling them underwater but not really under it until they reach another room

“That hairpin of yours originally belong to somebody else, it’s function is to absorb others powers for your use”

“Absorb others powers?”

“A marvelous artifact if you ask me, you came here last time to modify it, so that you could use it” he starts walking around the room checking what his workers are crafting a vase, a bell, a coronet everything needs to be approved by him “but you see, modifications such as this may lead to dire consequences”

“It makes sense that you can’t remember anything then” at Shua’s words Ten hums in agreement

“Understandable, you take other powers but lose your memory in return, if your memories are gone what can you even do if you have the powers. It’s the law of heaven after all, that you must lose something to obtain something, what a fabulous work” he claps a little

“Why did you do it then?”

“The young man was determined” his face changes again to the one of a fox his voice even lower “it's also due to the vanity of an old fox, transformations, implantation, turning demons into humans, humans into demons, and all the other unholy things are interesting to us, I'm even thinking of letting people know their fates”

now

Jeno doesn’t like parties, their team had won but he still didn’t want to celebrate, however, his teammates decided to not take no for an answer and drag him all the way to Yangyang’s house, he thinks it’s funny how he always ends up doing things he rather not do and yet he’s here a soda in his hand as he makes his way through the crowd, he really cannot go, he’s supposed to drive the boys and you back home.

Yangyang’s house is way too big, too much space, too many people, it takes a while before he finds some rather secluded place where the music it’s not too loud and the bodies aren’t pressed together.

He likes quiet, the backyard it’s almost desolate just a few people here and there they’re all minding their own business, no one cares about him, he lays down in one of the chairs near the pool looking at the night sky wishing he could see the stars, there was a time when he didn’t know them, when he was taught how to read them and their meaning, all by the hand of someone he couldn’t remember, he knew it was there, somewhere inside his mind, his hands were tinted in red, his memories erased by the pain if only he could stop seeing you in his dreams, ever since he met you he’s been dreaming, and he’s not sure if his dreams are true, he’s sure he can recognize your face in a sea of people, the only face in a crowd he’s sure he knows and yet, he’s not sure of what to call you, was it your face or was his mind playing tricks on him, he’s not sure

“We were supposed to have a clear view of the stars today,” you say as you lay done in the chair on his left, he doesn’t bother looking at your side, just humming a response

“Did you know that we’re pretty much looking at the past?” It’s not the first time you try to start a conversation with him, but he wonders how much have you drink by the way you talk “I’ve always loved the night sky, it’s so pretty, my mama used to say, she used to say, something about my dad living in a castle in the sky before my grandma said he was going back to his cycle, and I always wonder which was true, you know, if we do get to live another life”

“You don’t believe in reincarnation?” he’s surprise

“I mean, you can never be so sure of anything, I don’t particularly believe in many things, I didn’t believe in magic until I went to The Precious Jade shop” he looks at your profile, eyes glinting and mouth curved into a smile “there are so many things there Jeno, so many” your arms move illustrating your words “I’ve been there twice now, but Mark doesn’t know” you put your finger to your mouth signaling a secret

“Why did you go there Y/N?” you half shrug and wave dismissively with your hand

“It’s not important really” your body turns towards him glaring

“You’re very rude, did you know that?” you don't let him answer “ever since we met, you’ve been rude, and I really don’t know why, I’m not asking you to like me but you really go around just shutting yourself whenever I’m around the boys but when we are alone you do talk, it makes no sense Jeno! It really doesn’t! I just want to be friends with you” you sound so mad with your hands in fists

“For someone who wants me to talk you been doing all the talking, don’t you think” you get flustered by his words, a little red covering your cheeks “besides who said I wanted to be your friend” he uses a joking tone, hoping it makes you smile, it’s not that he doesn’t like you, but he has seen things he wished he never see

You do laugh, calling him rude once again but there’s something in your eyes he cannot quite understand, he keeps you talking for his sake, he likes the soft tone of your voice even with slurred words.

The night fades away with the sound of your laughter and the stories exchange about cats and school, Jeno swears he’s going to ignore his dreams, you’re kind and he’s foolish to believe otherwise

When the boys decide it’s over you made your way next to a clingy Haechan back to his car putting your friends on the back seat, making them fit, while you sit on his side, singing the tunes on the radio and giggling when any of them made up the lyrics, he drops you off at Mark’s place where Johnny waits for you and his roommates, and while he drives off with the two rest drunk men on his backseat he thinks about the thousand years he’s spent meditating that had never provided the calm he craves and how for a moment that night he felt close to reach it, while he was by your side.

before

They had left the shop after getting a little more information from the owner who had given them a scale from the previous owner, he knew that because he could feel his origins within it too, as they both walk the path that’ll lead them back to the temple they found the day before they sense someone in the shadows, as the figure of a man approaches them turning more violent, especially after seeing Shua, going directly towards her, ready to attack, he puts himself right in front of her, their powers colliding the other men calls his name

“Jeno!” somehow it triggers the memories he has, of said men in his life, the one that is like a brother to him “Jaemin?” he feels overwhelmed by emotions, suddenly a wave of memories returning to him, he hugs his friend a deep breath leaving his mouth “Jaemin, I finally remember who I am”

They all walk back to the temple, Jaemin telling him about the mission their master had entrusted him to, but everything about that time is a blur and why is the General and his counselor catching snakes? What do they need them for?

“He practices the Lunar arts, which is the same linage as snakes” Jaemin explains “He steals the essence of our souls to gain strength, that's why master wanted you to go and absorb the general and his counselor essences to finally get rid of them and be free” he looks directly at Shua “Humans are treacherous”

“Not her” Jeno stands between them “she’s different Jaem, she helped me when I was so lost”

“She's still a human, she belongs to the catcher village, she's an accomplice, she deserves to die!” once again Jaemin’s rage turns visceral lashing against her, as if she could protect herself, Jeno tries to distract him to no avail his wrath is uncontrollable

“You have forgotten our master's warnings Jeno, she's a human, all humans are liars!”

“I might not remember the warnings, but I know her, she’s not like that!”

“But I do remember!!” at Jaemins display of power the ground trembles and collapses, revealing the underground part of the temple, too many doors that could provide refugee to escape his brother's rage, only to end up stuck in a demon's trap

3. an empty heart

now

You were going to kill Na Jaemin.

When he invited you to the movies you had agreed but he had failed to mention his best friend was coming over too, so now that you were in the presence of the man you had been actively avoiding for the past 2 weeks you were at loss of words and mad

The morning after the party you had woken up with a really bad hangover and the memories of calling him out had shamed you ever since, it wasn’t like you didn’t mean the things you said but you weren’t friends to be saying anything of the sorts even if he was kind enough to not get angry, he even had driven you home for god's sake, you were beyond embarrassed.

So after two weeks of walking the other way whenever you saw him and eating all your meals with Yuqi or alone to avoid the group gatherings, even canceling movie night on Friday because you knew he was going to be there it all had failed thanks to your reporter friend

“I didn’t know you were coming too” you try, really try to not sound as blunt as you do

“Yeah, I was the one to told him about the movie actually” he scratches the back of his neck “I’m really sorry he’s not here too, but it was an ultimate notice note and well he can’t lose it, and it’ll be a shame to have you come all the way for nothing” you shake your head

“Nonono it’s okay, really– are you buying anything? Would you like some popcorn?” You try to divert the topic

“We should buy some, I think” so you nod and made your way to the line trying hard not to think too much, if he feels uncomfortable he doesn’t mention and you really can’t look at his face to tell so you follow his lead, it’s only after you’re seated that you realize it’s the first time since you’ve met that you haven’t made any attempt to start a conversation with him, you are actively trying to ignore him, making yourself comfortable in your seat paying attention to the trailers before the movie begins

“Have you been good?” His voice pulls you out of your thoughts

“What?”

“Oh, it’s just– the guys said they haven’t seen you in a while so I thought you were probably sick”

“Ahhh, that? No, I’ve– I was been just helping Yuqi with one her assignments, she needed a model after hers bail on her so I was helping her out” that’s wasn’t completely a lie, you had help Yuqi but only after she had seen you cling to her for an entire week without explanation, of course, you had told her everything after and she had let you follow her only if you help which you gladly did, “What was it about?” his voice is full of curiosity you can’t stop the words from flowing

“She had to prepare a full pictorial, you know, the theme, the clothes, makeup and hairstyles, everything! Since her theme was rather risky she was stressed, but everything turn out well, it was really pretty, she told me I could keep one of the dresses after she got her score” you smile, thinking back modeling for her had been fun, he smiles back, his eyes turning into crescent moons he says something you can’t quite catch as you’re distracted by his beauty before the light turn off and the movie starts to roll, none of you talk until you’re making your way out of the cinema, discussing everything you didn’t like about the movie, you leave first to dinner with some of your classmates.

That night you received two texts from an unknown number, the first saying they enjoy hanging out with you, the second telling you he got your number from Jaemin and hope you don’t get mad, it’s not hard to tell who it is. You sure hope something will shift.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You make your way through the streets that have become too familiar to you, the shop stands tall before you in no time and you quickly make your way in, you know Ten is waiting for you, just as he was last time, he greets you with a smile that doesn’t meet his eyes

“He said you’ll come” he whispers you tilt your head

“Kun said so, I kind of hope you didn’t”

“And why is that?” You feel a little hurt after all you were excited to meet him

“Because I have to relay a message now” he proceeds to talk you through a topic you had forgotten only you leave the shop with a piece of information you’re not sure you wanted to know.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

The boys had convinced you to study together again, so you find yourself walking into the library and you can clearly see the three guys sitting there conversing animatedly with each other, you can even see Jeno’s smile which takes you back to your recent encounter and him actually texting you over the week, you’re not gonna lie saying it didn’t excite you, after all he was way too sweet and considerate and you often found yourself thinking of him. you sit in the empty chair and they proceeded to fill you in on whatever they’re talking which turns to be hockey, more specifically the upcoming match with HYB U

“Are you coming?” It takes you by surprise that Jeno is the one asking and not Jaemin but as far as you know that match it’s supposed to be played in HYB U campus next town, not in NCU

“Isn’t that going to be in HBU?” you ask just to confirm “I never go to out of town matches though, I just cheer for my boys from here” you tilt your head towards him and you swear you can hear Renjun’s muffled laughter

“You never go?” Jaemin asks but you just shake your head

“Why do you call them your boys? Don’t you think that’s kinda cringy even for you” Renjun’s question is full of tease and disgust

“Leave me alone!” You groan extending the last letter “besides you’re my boy too” you give him the sweetest smile you can muster before Jaemin calls you again

“What about me? Am I your boy too?” He wiggles his eyebrows making you laugh but you can hear his friend telling him to stop, you drift back to other topics before Renjun parts leaving you with the roommates, as you start to take things out of your bag you sense Jaemin is curious about something but he doesn’t seem brave enough to ask out so you decide to do it for him

“What is it that you want to know?” Jaemin eyes widened at your question seeming more nervous than before

“I’m sorry” he apologizes “it’s just– it’s not my business but Haechan said something about not letting you go there and so I grew curious and, well, yeah–” you don’t know why you even bother at this point, your best friend is a resentful imbecile and it seems it’ll stay like that forever, you hear as Jeno once again nags Jaemin about being too nosy but you decide to share

“It’s not something bad,” you think it isn’t but a little voice inside your head tells you otherwise “well, I mean– it’s just, you see” you pause seeing that both boys have their eyes on you, you aren’t going out of this “my ex studies there” you deadpan, they both gape at you “but it really is nothing, we’re still friends, it’s just Haechan being petty” you start babbling “he doesn’t like Soobin and acts spiteful towards him, he doesn’t like when we meeting up and yeah, but we’re on good terms, really, I just don’t go there because it’s too much traveling back and forth, and so yeah”

“Is he a hockey player too?” that comes from Jeno and Jaemin looks just as shocked as you suppose you do

“He, no, he’s a dancer” they both nod and you go back to the notes you have already taken out of your bag without a word but your mind goes overdrive, it’s not that big of a deal, Soobin and you had been happy together once to many years before and while your relationship took many things from you it wasn’t entirely his fault but yours too, the both of you were guilty of everything going wrong with it, you were young and dumb and you both ended hurting each other, but there was still appreciation and you still hope for him to succeed and be happy and you knew he wished the same for you because you had been friends before it all started.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Studying together at the library had become a regular occurrence, Jeno often found himself excited to meet up even if Jaemin wasn’t going, which happened a lot since the newspaper suddenly lost two of their best reporters, the dreams hadn’t stopped but they were usually so short and uncertain he still couldn’t piece them together even the fox didn’t have an answer to his questions often sending him back to just ignore them as if it was something easy to do, ignoring them wasn’t easy, especially after the constant presence of you in his life

Jeno was getting to know you, and everything felt like you but at the same time, like it wasn’t, as if you were two different people in one without even knowing, and yet, for him, it made sense.

Ten always says that there’s always a price you have to pay for the things you want, even if sometimes it’s something we don’t want to give away. The fox demon knew this very well since he’s used to making deals for much more: to give up your humanity, to take your essence, or to give up your love and grief, Jeno knew he had turned humans into demons, he had sold weapons to dragon kings or warriors and he had taken away the pain of a peach blossom demon to help them move to their next reincarnation, and yet he had reminded him that he once too had been young and self-indulgent, given away more than he should have

As a demon, he had done bad things but Jeno liked to believe he had never acted without motive or remorse and yet it wasn’t just that what stops him to fall for you, or to accept he was falling, something else prevented him from that, and he still couldn’t remember what it was

Sharing supplies with Renjun during studio sessions was a given, while he managed to paint rich landscapes you always had a hard time with those. But now as you splash the canvas with green and blue you think this is the best one you’ve ever made, it’s been a while since you’ve painted a landscape that you actually like, so you try to focus on it and avoid any intrusive thought, it’s usually not hard since having Renjun provides you certain calm, but even he seems uneasy and you don’t know why. “You know” he starts “ I heard something” you turn to look at him, “Ten said you went to the shop again” you stared at him you did go but you hoped not to tell anyone “I don’t want to know why I just want you to know I don’t judge, I work there, after all, I just hope whatever you got there actually helped you” he smiles

You think Renjun is way too sweet for his own good, he’s not the only one who would have said that but he sure has a way to approach things it makes you want to lay it all on him, and yet you don’t, you thank him and smile back before you both go back to your canvas but now but your mind is crowded with what you were told. That day at the shop Ten had talked about soulmates again, but this time he make sure to mention this didn’t apply to lovers only, according to him platonic soulmates were a thing that of course made you think of your friends, you were sure that if your soulmate turns to be a platonic one it’ll be one of them.

Hyuck still hadn’t found someone who you’ll accept a blind date with, and in the meantime, you had gone back to just hanging out with them, you had somehow grown close to Jeno that even the guys pick it up after he sat next to you once on movie night, Jeno was still pretty reserved but he was now the one initiating conversations, texting you random things and meeting you at the library often and you were terribly comfortable with him, he provided some sense of familiarity you couldn’t quite understand

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

It was after one of the study sessions that Jeno had offered to drive you, since it was late, you had suggested that you could get dinner before heading home and he had accepted, so now you were seated beside him at a little Korean restaurant sharing tteokbokki and talking, Jeno’s eye smile makes you swoon more than you’d like to and he looks so happy and comfortable you feel warm inside

“This place has been here since the 80’s I think, it’s a family business, you see those photos” you turn to look at the wall he’s pointing with his finger and nod “those are them”

“Wow, how did you find this place?” You pick a rice cake and take it to your mouth

“It was coincidental, I was kind of lost and found a way here” he turns to the old lady sitting by the entrance that had greeted him so effusively when you arrived “that lady has been feeding me ever since” his eyes shine so bright you wonder if you have ever seen someone with prettier eyes, you're going down bad, you ignore the missing beats of your heart and the nervousness that direct eye contact gives you, but when he sees you which such fondness in his eyes you allow yourself to hope, even a little bit.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“I heard you’ve been stealing my best friend” it’s the first thing Haechan says when he saw him at the beginning of practice, and while it’s true you’ve been spending time together Jeno didn't expect to get a reaction from Hyuck

“What?”

“I saw you together at Neo Cafe the other day, very rude of you to not invite me”

“It was a coincidence actually, not that you care I assume”

“That’s right, I don’t believe in coincidence, especially since I notice you two have grown really close, am I right?”

“She’s nice” it’s all Jeno says, he focuses on finish stretching before the coach comes back, but of course, he would have known his friend better

“So I’ve heard, you know it’s funny because this friend of mine came to me asking to be on a blind date with her, he’s such a nice guy I wouldn’t mind him dating her, you know but then I thought of you, so I better make sure everything is fine before anything happens right?” Jeno feels something boiling inside of him, the idea of you going out with someone else annoys him and at the same time makes him subdued and yet he doesn’t think he’s in any position to complain

“Why would I care?” That’s exactly what he questions himself, he shouldn’t but he does

“I thought you were interested but I guess not” the coach finally enters the ice rink calling them all into formation while anger fill him up, he skates faster, he hits harder, he lets loose of his powers while he lets anger consume him from within, the dreams were bad enough to deal with but now the idea of you with someone else brings a sense of hopelessness he hasn’t felt before

Once he’s out of practice he hopes Jaemin it’s not home but of course, the deities have never listened to his prayers because his friend is there, Jeno doesn’t even try to hide

“You’ve been acting up” his friend accuses him “and you’ve been hiding things but I let it slide, now your mood it’s bad bad and I want to know why because when we met up before practice you were happy, so what happened?” Jeno thinks of the irony of his friend accusing him of hiding things when it’s exactly what he’s been doing for ages now but he doesn’t want to argue, he feels too tired for that he just wants to give up, “I’ve been dreaming” he starts, he has to tell the truth after all it’s long overdue

before

The secret tunnel underneath the temple turned out to be a maze, a trap to exorcise demons with fire, extinguishing them if one walks too close to the array but it turns to be harmless to humans, each door in every new room symbolizes something different, choosing the wrong one means death, only the door of life could help them get out

“It's okay,” Shua says once they arrive at a different room “don't worry and don't walk too close to the trap, I’ll look for the way out” a little smile on her face

Jeno watches as she goes before eyeing the trap in front of him and the inscription on it

“Demons and monsters are to be revealed and killed, bodies and souls obliterated” sudden memories that are supposed to be forgotten come back, the pain of his kind, all the snakes that are hunted and killed to strengthen the General, the grief for those who can't ascend, all the lives that have been lost. Shua comes back to him telling him about the way out but he can't listen, he remembers but he wishes he didn't

“Ah Shua, are demons only born to be annihilated?” his words make her gasp

“No Jeno, it shouldn’t be like that, the more demons they kill the world turns more chaotic” she kneels before him holding his arms “It doesn't matter what you are Jeno, it doesn't matter what happens I will be there for you” her words reassure him and he finds himself pulling her close, his head on the crotch of her neck, he stays there, absorbing her warmth until he decides he has had enough, his mind made up for what he knows he has to do, he pulls back holding her face in his hands and kisses her, bodies pressed to each other, he can't have her close enough, he kisses her with all of him, trying to put all his emotions in the kiss, returning the acceptance that she has given him, the kindness and the love she has shown him before they have to face reality again.

now

You know something must have happened, ever since you got Jenos number you've been texting nonstop, random text here and there, but it’s been almost a week since he answer any of your texts, so when Friday comes you walk into the guy’s apartment for movie night, you had hoped to just have fun with them, especially since it’s the first time you've come to Jeno and Jaemin’s place, that however seems will be difficult by the tense atmosphere around them, you don’t know what happened but you sure want to know the reason behind it.

While the night flies away with the attempts to make things better you notice it’s not exactly all of them but Jeno who seems to be upset, you want to question him and yet decide against it because he might just want to give whatever happened some thought. It’s not until the Chinese takeout arrives that everyone starts to relax and joke around, and you swear you’re going to have a good night but you jinx it with the mere thought

“You will never believe what happened!” Haechan starts as if he just remembered the information, everyone turns to look at him since he is the primary source of information and gossip

“Someone told me they like Y/N!” you choke on your food, and while Mark tries to give you some water to calm you down you can see Haechans naughty eyes

“Don’t act so shocked we all know you’re a cutie” Renjun laughs at that approving his words

“Well, and what happened?” That comes from Jaemin who looks distraught

“Well they asked me if she’ll be interested in a blind date with them, of course, I said I’ll ask but I just remembered” he turns to look directly at you now “what you say, darling, you up for a date?” His question drags everyone’s eyes on you except the one who seems to be more interested in his food, the one you turn to look unconsciously at, some part of you, the one who has accepted your interest in certain dark-haired boy hopes he meets your eyes because he somehow, might feel, just a tiny bit like you, but he never does and you tell yourself he has never actually shown anything of the sorts, that he is only friendly, you still feel disappointed.

You look directly at Hyuck’s eyes and then look back at Mark who’s always the voice of reason and think how they would feel if you were to tell them that afternoon Soobin called and ask you on a date too

“It’s a shame,” you said “cause I already say yes to someone else” You don’t miss Haechans wide eyes, never expecting that response, your friends go crazy with your words asking you who it is, you decide to just throw the bomb and think about the consequences later

“Soobin called” everyone quiets “he’s coming and asked me out” you look directly at your best friend, “I said yes” you look around to see all your friends faces, except you’re meet with Jeno’s closed expression that makes you feel like you finally shut a door that was never fully open and yet never close, and for a moment you think back of the little shop at the end of the street you haven’t visited since last time, of the advice Kun had given and the talks you share with the owner, and you think that if soulmates were real, and you were to have one it was definitely not going to be Lee Jeno.

before

They walk hand in hand through the tunnel, once they're finally out they meet a rather calm Jaemin waiting for them, Jeno knows what he should do, he walks directly toward him

“It's okay Jaem, I’ll go with you” Shua stops, looking for his eyes

“What are you doing?”

“I think- we should go separate ways. The rules must be obeyed, Shua. There are things, things that you don't want to do but have to be done nevertheless” he doesn't turn to look at her, he doesn't think he could “You are a human. I am a demon. As you said before, in the boat, some things are better forgotten” he feels his chest hurt

“You are right,” she says, her head low “Humans and demons have different destinies after all, but ours it's the same. What we have is real” she lifts her head “I’ll find a way. For us, I’ll be back. Wait for me” they’re dreading the results, Jeno knows and Shua does too but he waits, he waits for her to return

“She’s a human, she’ll be killed if we are together” he thinks

“I don't think she’ll return, brother, we should go” Jaemin tries to convince him but he doesn't want to listen “we’ve been together for hundreds of years, we’ve meditated and trained until our bodies are what they are today, but we are demons at the end, will she still love you when the time comes and you are unveiled?” Jeno tries to walk away but he won't let him, “I thought only humans could understand the feeling of love”

“I thought I was human when I woke up”

“What is so good about knowing the feeling of love then?”

4. not if but when

now

You pick your glass and take it to your mouth, you weren’t lying when you said you had accepted a date with Soobin.

The both of you had thought why not, no hopes, no promises just give it a try, but as the dinner continues you feel nothing changing, he’s a friend and you love him like one. You don’t think is wrong what you’ve done, however, you could never expect Haechan outburst when you told them, he was so mad it shocked you, you had left the apartment in hopes of him calming down and gone the next day to theirs, which was proven to be a bad idea, he had shouted even more hurtful words than before making Johnny mad in the process, so now Haechan was only talking to Mark, Johnny had spent almost two weeks in his girlfriend's place and you had exiled yourself from any of your friends beside him, Yuqi or Renjun who had kindly reminded you it wasn’t your fault when he found you crying at an empty classroom after one of your classes, so everything was pretty much a mess

“You feel it too right?” Soobin question takes you out of your thoughts

“What exactly?” Your not sure what he means

“It feels like a normal dinner with a friend” he smiles and you smile back nodding

“I really wanted to give it a try” “Me too”

“I didn’t–“ “I know” he laughs

“We really fucked up, back then, didn’t we?” He doesn’t wait for your answer “I used to think we will get married someday, you know, I loved you so much and you loved me back, but then I just took, I took and kept taking and expected for you to want the same things I did, I never notice how much it was hurting you, I’ll always be sorry for that” you’ve noticed that every time you’ve seen him since your breakup he looks sorry as if every time he sees you he can’t help but think of your hurting but the thing is he hurt too, you sigh

“I know you’re sorry, Soobin, but it wasn’t entirely your fault, I used to believe love was giving myself away, and I was wrong too, we both were, we couldn’t let go of the things we learn, and we couldn’t move forward with how things were” you pause hoping he get everything you’re trying to say “I don’t blame you, we both were young and dumb and trying our best with what we had”

He drops you off at your building after the last hug and the promise of messaging you regularly, and you feel lighter as you make your way to your apartment, hoping things get better between you and Haechan and that somehow you get to forget you ever hoped of a destiny written in the stars

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Midterms arrive before you notice, you have a free week before you have to go back to classes so as always your plan to go back home to spend some days with your mother this time accompanied by Yuqi who also is free. so you both are taking the train that’ll take you home on the other side of town. You’re not surprised when your mom picks you up at the station, but when she asks about your best friend you simply say he stayed behind with Mark and Johnny because of a different schedule.

Things weren’t solved just yet, especially because this time you were not going to be the one to say sorry first, so you were waiting, and it didn’t bother you, for him to realize what exactly he did wrong, especially since it wasn’t some little thing that could be ignored, and Yuqi was more than willing to remind you every time you almost gave in

As days pass by and Yuqi makes her way into your mother's heart, you find yourself dwelling on your thoughts of the precious jade and a boy who never said too much and yet made your heart swell, of course, your mother knew something had happened and the day before you returned to campus she had taken you both into the kitchen to help her made cookies

“Y/N used to help since she was little,” she tells Yuqi “she’ll bring her friends over too, mostly Haechan and then Mark and even Johnny would come too” your friend only smiles “those boys always eating too many cookies but of course, they’ll help to make them” you laugh at the memory of a very confused Mark adding too much salt which has made him end in cleaning duty “Mark always had a hard time but at the end, he learn to follow a recipe”

“You have to admit he’s good at following orders now” you defended your friend, she just laughs and nods

“Darling” she calls out for you “I saw miss Lee yesterday, she said Haechan is back but she hasn't see you” you halt, Yuqi looks directly at you “oh no, don't give me that look darling, i'm not trying to nag, i know you guys will resolve whatever happened between the two of you, after all you've been friends for years now” she smiles at you “you know I always thought you'd end up with him right?” you look at her in shock whie Yuqi laughs her ass off “Ma!” “its true darling, but then he call me a few weeks ago telling me how he found someone for you” your friend finally ends laughing “he did what?” she asks “yes, he calls me all the time to tell me he's looking after you” she smiles “but I was so shook when he told me that, but he didn't say much about him just that I’ll love him when I meet him, I wanted to know more though” Yuqi looks back at you “why would he do that?” you just shrugged, there were a lot of things your best friend would do that never made sense to you, that night however your heart warms at the thought of your friend calling your mother to let her know about you even when you call her regularly and you think back to all the times you've written a text to his mother and all the nagging you've done in order for him to call her once every two weeks even when you know he texts his siblings just to know about her without her knowing because even if he is an imbecile he still is cares for the ones he loves.

Haechan had made his way into your apartment a couple of days before you started classes again, he had gone with food in his hands and an apology in his mouth just to both end up sobbing in each other's arms, that night you had lay side to side in your bed talking everything out

“I knew you like Jeno,” he says once you had stopped talking you turn to look at him “I knew because I saw you with him multiple times at the cafe, the library too and I saw his texts once we were together and you left behind your phone while you were in the bathroom,” you think back of the boy who still has not contact you, you don't blame him after all you had cast a wall between you the last time you saw him, that however made you sad

“I don't think he likes me Hyuck” you smile at your friend “but it's fine I just wish I hadn't grown so used to him, it's hard to have all this radio silence from his side”

“I think he is perfect for you, you know” that surprises you “it could have never thought of that at first, but then I saw you together and it made sense you know” then he proceeds to tell you exactly why you would be perfect together and why he won't push you to do nothing

before

The General’s counselor had found them, and surrounded the temple with his troops. They fought and Jeno couldn't believe the power of the hairpin, leaving it as his last resource it had absorbed all the power the counselor had within seconds, leaving him defenseless, what he hadn't expected was to be turned into a giant snake.

After listening to the men said the General was heading to the catcher's village it was his chance to finally get rid of him but she had returned

Shua had come back to him, she had turned herself into a demon while he destroyed a whole looking for revenge

“I see that you returned” Jaemins words are mocking “but Jeno turned himself into a giant python” he looks at her more intently “you're one of us now, I see, after such a little time with him” he laughs “tell me after seeing him in his full demon form, are you still fond of him?”

Shua was.

She had tried to stop him, calling out his name, trying to stop him from going to the village where the General awaited

“Jeno, just see, I'm one of you now, I went to the shop, turned myself into a demon, we can be together now, it doesn't matter if you are this big now, there's a whole world out there, full of wonders, we can discover it, together and free. Come with me, Jeno, I know we can be happy”

now

Jaemin looks at him in disbelief, it's been weeks since the movie night fiasco and he knows Haechan hasn't apologized just yet but now out of shame so he had gone and tried to knock some sense into him which is why Jaemin is staring at him from his bedroom door

“You're telling me you pep talk Haechan into apologizing but you still won't do that after ghosting her,” Jeno thinks it not the same but he accepts he's quite a hypocrite

“I don't think I can do it, Jaem” “why not Lee Jeno?” he ignores the fact that even if he's using his last name I have no effect on him since he feels not a single attachment to it

“I really don't think you understand Jeno, you are good for her, nightmares or not” he sighs going out of the room just to return with something in his hands, the hairpin he safely keeps “look, i think it's time you finally have this” he handles the hairpin to him but Jeno just look at it warily not even attempting to take it, Jaemin groans, he looks so done with him right now, he puts it in his nightstand instead “you're really getting me out of my nerves, that it's yours, it has always been” Jeno raises his eyebrow “so, whenever you feel ready, just take it, it will solve many things” he looks at Jeno one last time before exiting the room and closing the door behind him, Jeno looks closely at the item place in his nightstand but he doesn't think he’ll be brave enough to grab it tonight, he decides to go to sleep and deal with it later, but probably he should have done it because when morning comes he's sure hes seen you die but he's not sure if he was the one trying to save you or the one who got you dead

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He's on his way to class when he sees you again, at first you don't see him, you're sitting on one of the benches near the library, hair pulled down talking on the phone. He feels a pang in his chest, a pain greater than anything he has ever felt, he feels so lonely, seeing you there after all this time, after all his dreams, when you look up after hanging up you look at him there,

“Hey there stranger” a smile on your lips making its way to your eyes, his heart clenches, he doesn't deserve that smile “long time no see” he nods

“How have you been?” he asks “I heard Haechan apologize for what he said last time” your smile fades a little at that

“He did, we put up a show there didn't we?” you try to joke but he feels like shit, he is shaking his head

“Actually I- well, I want to apologize too” your eyes widened at that “I didn't answer your texts, I'm sorry about it I was just-” now you're the one shaking your head

“It's alright Jeno, really you don't need to say sorry”

“Y/N I…”

“Please Jeno, don't apologize” a small grin on your face that doesn't reach your eyes “it was nothing really, we’re still friends” his stomach drops, he hears someone call your name, you bid him goodbye and a last smile before leaving, your back turn to him before he can say anything, he stays there watching as you turn little in the distance before turning left, he wishes he stopped you, tell you what exactly is on his mind, tell you the truth. But what is the truth if he doesn't know himself

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“I need answers” that’s the first thing he says as he enters the shop.

Jeno is frantic, he’s hunted by the things he’s seen and by the feelings that had started to riot inside him especially after seeing you yesterday

“What happened now?” The owner comes to the front looking disrupted, it’s almost 11 am, and yet Ten doesn’t like to be bothered before noon, Jeno knows that the fox demon values his sleep however he’s known him for years now to know that even if he’s grumpy he will still help him somehow

“I need to know, what I forgot, please Ten tell me, tell me why I keep seeing her, tell me about her” the fox sighs

“Jaemin already gave you the hairpin Jeno, you just need to hold it tight, as for her… well, her destiny has been sealed for thousand years by a bond that’s stronger than time” he pauses, “I think you already feel where this is going Jeno, you're just afraid of it, every fair exchange its worth it, you just need to feel the pain you gave up for you to be happy Jeno, don't lose yourself when you already have what you're looking for”

He goes back to his apartment, he locks himself in his room looking at the hairpin, he sits in his bed before grabbing it, he's ready to know now

The general had found out about the village he had taken his troops there, all the magic he had absorbed from the snakes made him strong, Jeno had made his way to the village too, after fighting and defeating the general counselor he was stronger but it’ll soon prove to not be enough, Shua had told him to wait but he couldn’t, for his kind, for all the snakes that had been hunted and killed to feed the greed of a proud man whose ego was hurt by the emperor, he wished things were different, he wished he had taken Shua’s offer but he didn’t, and now he was here. The General had started the ritual to get rid of him once he realized he couldn’t fight him trapped in his web Jeno had tried to fight back, the ritual was stopped once Jaemin had stabbed the General with the hairpin, the hairpin that was given to him and the one that was previously owned by his master. The master who was now taking the power from the General until he couldn’t stand anymore before turning to her people, taking what she had given to the clan.

Every single one of them had lost their powers to feed hers and Jeno was about to lose his too, turned into a snake again, he knew the rage of his master had a reason but she had done wrong using the clan for her own benefit while making them believe she cared for them, before he knows it the General regain consciousness starting the ritual again Jeno was trapped under the dome that was meant to eliminate any trace of him and of anything trapped in it, his master was too, but so was Shua, she had tried to free him and now she was there too, while everything started to grow colder and colder, the grass and flowers had wilted already, his master had started to freeze losing her life, and Shua kept on trying, telling him to hang on, she had managed to get him out and handed him the hairpin she had picked up before taking his hand, there was supposed to be a way out, the constellations in the dome were there for a reason she kept telling him to follow her and he did he trusted her but it was too far away, the cold was too much for her body, he had picked her up, and tried but he couldn’t, he had lay there with her body in his arms while she kept shaking

“It’s okay Jeno,” a faint voice said “they’ll come, the villagers will come” he wanted to tell her no, the villagers hate demons and she was one of them now, she had gone and turned herself just so they could be together, it was all his fault

“You remember how you told me in the river that life is short, and sorrows long, and we should focus on the good things?” she smiles

“Remember how you laugh? Or the song I sang for you while on the boat? How you hold me while we were in those tunnels?” Jeno smiles at her nodding, his eyes stained in tears

“I wish I had listened to you,” he told her “we could be long gone, just you and I, everything would have been different then”

“We can still go” a smile painted on her face “we will get out of here and leave, we’ll find a place to settle, I can work with the herbs and you can help me”

“You need to know, Shua, if we don’t get out of here, we’ll never be born again, our souls will be extinguished”

“When we get out of here, we’ll be together and we’ll be happy”

“If we get out of here”

“It’s when Jeno not if, even if we die we can be together when we meet again” she touches his face so delicately he can’t do anything but close his eyes, they stay there waiting until a faint sound of rocks cracking makes him open his eyes, the villagers have come and they taking the tower down but when he turns to see her she’s fully frozen in his arms, he tries to call her but she’s leaving her body starts to float while it cracks, and just like that, all the memories they’ve made together start to play above her as her soul starts to fade into the dark, he holds her hand trying to pull her down to no avail

“No! You said we’ll leave together! Don’t leave!” Out of despair, he pulls out the hairpin, and with the last ounce of life he had left he had used his powers to tie her soul, he was trying to save her, to save their memories, to remember.

The tower falls, the dome collapses and so does he, the villagers called for her but she was already gone, she had died but her soul had been safe from annihilation. Now their memories reside in the hairpin that started it all, but she can be reborn and they could meet again if only he remembers.

He didn't, but Jeno still longed for her, the bond they had with each other was stronger than any magic, the memories of the life they once shared remained untouched in the hairpin.

Tears stream down his face, his chest hurts but his mind is finally clear, he can make out the silhouette of Jaemin by the door, he fails to notice the tears he too holds in his eyes

“You lost her once Jeno, when her soul almost vanished, don’t let there be a second time”

5. a new beginning

You found yourself in the library again, but this time with only Renjun by your side, you both are trying to come up with ideas for your project before it's too late for your teacher's approval, as you both discuss what art movement you should focus your project on someone comes up to your table taking a seat right in front of you, your eyes dart up almost popping out when you realize who it is

Lee Jeno is in front of you, smiling, you feel your breath caught up in your throat only nodding in recognition while Renjun takes his time greeting his friend, you don't think too much of it and go back to the matter at hand. It isn't until a couple of minutes later when you both decide it’s enough, you think Renjun it's more suited to go get your proposals to the TA, especially after you realize they had taken a special interest in him.

“I hope you know, I hate you Y/N” you just laugh getting Jeno’s attention who looks at your bickering before a sulking Renjun leaves

“What was that about?” he asks you turn to look at him, a smile still plastered on your face

“Oh well, our little Renjun has a little admirer” you giggle “our history TA is always around him so I have reasons to believe she likes him” he sends you another smile that has you questioning if you're hallucinating or not, you don't remember seeing him smile as much before

“I think I heard that rumor too” your eyes widened at his words “Did you now? What do you know?” you’re curious about what he has to say

“She’s a friend of one of my classmates, I kind of overheard once they were talking about this guy that she likes, she described him pretty well” you can feel your smile widening “I wasn’t sure until my classmate asked me if he had a girlfriend” you laugh at that last sentence you know your friend is shy about it but you do think this will help him realize he’s not the lost cause he thinks he is.

You grow more and more comfortable as time passes by, you like Jeno's company, and you can’t help but think back to Haechan’s words, you're so caught up in your thoughts you don't notice Jeno calling your name until he grabs one of your hands startling you, he's quick to apologize telling you it's late, he asks if you want to grab dinner together, you look directly at his face, the mole under his eye and the way his gaze holds so many emotions, and while there's a part of you that tells you to just go home, you end up getting up and holding his hand guiding him out of there, because against your better judgment you still like him and feel safe by his side.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“Have you ever heard the story of the man in white who was trapped in the temple in the middle of the forest?” Jaemin asks, you are currently at their apartment waiting for Jeno to come back from the convenience store so you can watch the movie he promised, ever since that day at the library you've been hanging out more just the two of you, and every day he seems more and more lively, smiling at you that cute eye smile that makes your heart skip a beat, going out of his way to make things for you, like that one time last week when he went to buy you breakfast after telling him you had pulled an allnighter the night before or when he went to the library to pick up some books you needed but were too lazy to go and get. The Jeno that would hold back and remain silent long gone, you like seeing this side of him, the one you thought you'll never be able to witness.

Jaemin words make you stop and think, there’s a common story everyone has heard at least once in their lives, it's part of the towns folklore and the reason behind the rites cast in the pagoda by those who believed

“It was a demons punishment,” you say “he did something so bad that this monk found out and trapped him there” you can see Jaemin nodding

“The thing is the demon didn't do anything” he pauses “he was trying to save his brother's life” he looks directly at my eyes “but that monk believed demons were supposed to perish, the demon never hurt anyone, he lived a peaceful life, he just wanted to find what he was so desperately looking for”

“I've never heard that version before, where do you get it from nana?” you ask after seeing him so down, his face cast by shadows of grieve

“I know this because I was there, beside him, all the time, I saw it happened and I couldn't do anything for him” his tone full of guilt

“What are you saying now Jaemin? there's no way you could've been there, you'll be older now”

“I was there, and that's something you have to know” his stare never falters “I'm immortal, Y/N, I’m a snake-demon, and I won't let it happen again” the seriousness of his statement throws you away, you just nod not knowing what to say, you remain there in the same spot you’ve been since you arrive before you start to ask about his life, you know Jaemin is no liar after all and you have been visiting a suspicious shop to know better than doubt of the existence of demons and magic, when Jeno finally returns and you learn that he, too, is a demon you aren’t as shock Jaemin has already filled you in.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

The peacefulness in his mind is disrupted by his friends, they all decided to gather at Mark and Haechan place after practice ended, you’re not there since Yuqi had convinced you to be her plus one to an event happening at one gallery downtown, he kinda wishes you were, they're about to tell them their little secret, it isn't like they didn't want to do it before they just never thought they could, he isn't that scared of his reactions, well, except for Mark he never knows how hell react, he wishes in a good way, he’s too important for him

“Guys!!” Jaemin screams gathering everyone's attention “there's something you should know” the three of them look at him,

“Did you get yourself a girlfriend?” comes Haechans question everyone looks baffled

“What? No! What are you talking about?” Hyuck turns to look directly at him

“What about you? Did you already ask Y/N out?” the bluntness of his words make Mark almost choke on his drink

“He what? Do you like Y/N? Since when?” he asks when he recovers from his coughs the boys start making fun of him

“Come on man, have you been living under a rock? Everyone knows about those longing stares they've been sharing”

“I saw them yesterday at the library, again” Renjun groans

“We were just studying” he defends himself

“That's even worse” Jaemin joins, “I thought you asked her out after that day at the apartment” that starts a whole new discussion, Jeno sighs

“Guys” he starts “As far as like to discuss this topic, there's something else you definitely should know” he pauses “we are demons” everyone falls silent

“I knew” Renjun’s words drag everyone’s attention towards him “I mean, I work at the shop, did you really think I wouldn't find out?” he shrugs, his statement starts another discussion between them where Haechan can’t stop complaining about him not sharing that with them and how a bad friend he is while Mark doesn’t say anything

It isn't until the argument fades away that he turns to look at Jeno in the eyes

“So…” he mumbles something before shaking his head, everyone in the room is silently waiting for him to say something “Are you really asking Y/N out?” out of all the things he could have said that was the most unexpected one

Jeno nods “I will, I like her a lot” Haechan coos at his words Mark only nods “Good, so hear me out…”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You pack your things preparing yourself to go out of the classroom, you're sure you’ve just experienced the most boring class in your college years and you are exhausted plus you’re hungry so you just want to grab some food and head home since this was your last class of the day.

You make your way out of the building heading to the cafeteria before someone calls out your name, you look to your side seeing Jeno running to you, a smile already on your face to greet him, once he is by your side you wait for him to calm down his breath before he gets to say a word, you laugh

“Are you done?” he greats you with a smile

“Yeah I just went out from my last class” he nods

“Would you like to go grab something to eat with me?” he’s been asking you to hang out or grab food with him before but somehow there's something about today that feels different, it probably has something to do with the way he’s looking at you

“I-I mean, I was planning to eat…so sure” you stutter through your words, he shakes his head

“No, I mean” he purses his lips “as in a date, not just hang out as friends” your breath gets caught in your throat and you feel yourself blushing before he starts rambling.

“Only if you want of course, if not we can just go as friends and..” his smile fading

“I'd like to go Jeno” you stop him “as in a date” the smile quickly returns to his face even brighter, he holds your hand and takes you to his car. For the first time in a while, you stop overthinking yourself, you feel so in place you don't want to move, with Jeno’s hand in yours and your cheeks tinted in pink you feel your heart so calm it makes you wonder if you ever have felt like this and you decide it's finally time to try again one last time.

And somewhere in your mind, you think to ask about the hairpin in his night table and the story Jaemin told you once, it is time for you to hear Jeno’s side.

bonus

“What!? So you're telling me you're not soulmates” Haechan’s voice is so loud it has every customer in the dinner giving you dirty looks, you should have known better than telling him here actually, so blame’s on you

“Keep it down would you” you nag him “But yes, he's not my soulmate but we are bonded together” Jeno had told you the story, you have heard every word

“I don't understand” at first you couldn't either

“We met in our past life” you pause thinking “well, my past-life, you know with him being immortal and everything” you whisper the last part “and we fell in love but you know how it works, I safe his life but I couldn't survive and somehow we bonded with each other, I’m not sure how, out of love or grief or longing”

“The promise of a moment together” Jeno’s voice startles you as you haven't had seen your boyfriend arrive, he presses a quick peck to your temple making Haechan gag you throw some napkins at your friend while Jeno sits beside you, holding one of your hands in his lap

Once your friend stops his gagging sounds he looks at the both of you with a grin on his face

“You guys are so disgustingly cute” he sighs “but if you aren’t soulmates then who?”

“For all I know it could be you” you answer, the face Haechan makes causing you both to laugh

“Gosh I wish I could deny it but it’ll make sense” he turns to look at Jeno “what about you, lover boy?” he smiles at the nickname

“Jaemin” he simply answers

“No way!” Haechan screams

“I would have thought it was rigged if it turn out to be anyone else,” you say, Jeno nods

“I would have thought so too”

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