#neither has my mom who's only 5'2

[friendofthecrows]

Hate hate hate how my wallet looks thick and muggable with cash basically falling out with how full it is but it's just because last time I went to the ATM it inexplicably gave me the entire amount in 5 lira bills???

(For context the average meal is around 50 lira, I was just grabbing an appropriate amount of cash for a few days. Previously that same ATM has given me the amount in a mix of 100 and 50 lira bills, so idk why it decided to make my life harder this time)

[appalachianapologies]

(long, but by no means bad or negative or sad)

My parents got up at 5:30 this morning (this is important, trust me), and so went to bed pretty early, around 8:30 PM. It's just my sister, her boyfriend, and me up, and now it's proper late, so she decides to take him home. One of the smoke alarms in the house begins chirping (no fire- it's out of battery).

It's okay, it's fine, I'm an adult and I've seen my parents change out the batteries plenty of times before, so i tell my sister to take her boyfriend home (he only lives a block or two away, but it's below freezing outside) and I'll deal with the smoke alarm. Slowly tracking the noise, i figure out which alarm it is.

The one in the master bedroom. The bedroom my parents are currently attempting to sleep in (and according to the soft snores, one of my parents is still asleep in)

Okay, so no turning on the lights, because that'll totally wake the other one up and again, they've been up since 5:30 so they really need to sleep. For practice, i take apart one of the smoke alarms in the other part of the house, where the lights are on and there are no sleeping parents.

Totally got this, totally doable.

Slowly, I bring a chair into my parents' bedroom, set it down as quietly as i can, and turn on my phone flashlight with it angled away from the bed.

Now. I am 5'2". I am very short, and ceilings are very tall- there's a reason why my dad usually changes our the smoke alarm batteries. But he's just woken up, is very unhappy about being woken up, and there's no way in hell I'm making him get out of warm and comfy bed. Second problem, socks are slippery on wood dining chairs, but my feet are covered in scars so I don't ever take my socks off.

This leaves me shaky on my toes, one hand holding the phone flashlight, the other trying to maneuver the chirping alarm off before it wakes up my mom.

Victory!

But only half the battle. Taking it outside back to the lit up part of the house, i sit down, take the old battery out, and put the new one in. It was really hard to close the area where the battery sits, but that's neither here nor there.

Now all i have to do is reattach the wires and screw the smoke alarm back in on the ceiling. It's not a one handed job, so my dad, who is still unfortunately awake, tells me to just turn on the hall light because safety.

It's still not bright enough though, so he tells me to just turn on the bedroom light. This'll surely wake up my mom, but so will falling to the ground and cracking my head open, so i do it anyway.

But here's the catch - the lights in the master bedroom are old. Like, really old. Old as in when you hit the switch the lights don't instantly turn on as bright as they get, but instead start really really dim and then brighten within a minute or two.

I still have time to do this without waking my mom, who has miraculously still stayed asleep. (Ironically, I was staying up to watch a speedrunning stream, so I'm ready to do this fast.) Attach the black, orange, and yellow wires, and then try to remember which way to screw the smoke alarm back in.

Delicately jump down from the chair and then turn off the lights before they become bright enough to wake up my mom. And somehow, it works. I wait around just to make sure the smoke alarm isn't going to start chirping again.

Somehow I get it, and about thirty seconds later, my sister comes back home from dropping the boyfriend off.

Huh.

[leia-imogen]

aaron & the family he's found all by himself; vol. 2 // vol. 1

( ft. short jokes, a belated birthday shopping trip, & an ultra-chaotic winter break )

( for @criswisstuff & anyone who enjoyed the first one <3 )

savannah, who is 5'9, is constantly teasing aaron and cleo for being short. katelyn's good at 5'6, and also a bit impossible to tease bcs she's the actual best, so she gets to escape this

cleo ( 5'2 ) is perfectly delighted to have someone shorter than her for once in her life, even by only 2 inches

aaron: guys, just try and see this from my point of view

sav: [ collapses ]

katelyn: [ crouches down ]

cleo: [ sits cross-legged on floor ]

aaron: dude you're literally 2 inches taller than me

cleo: 2 and a quarter

sav is so smug about this but in a good-natured way, in that she and cleo call aaron "kid" or "kiddo" or "pipsqueak" and he doesn't mind bcs they always say it w such a huge smile and he likes to respond to sav with "how's the weather up there, tall-ass?"

and katelyn thinks it's ridiculously adorable how tiny aaron is and obviously she uses him as an armrest all the time

katelyn, petting aaron's hair: guys guys omg he's like an angsty mini blond kitten and i would kill for him <3

sav, popping up between them: mini-yard :))

before i get super distracted, i just wanna mention that aaron met sav and cleo towards the end of november, so they missed the twin's birthday

but sav still insists that she must take him shopping bcs sure his fashion sense is fine but there's always room for improvement, isn't there, aaron??

he relents, so long as she and cleo and katelyn ( who already gave him a birthday present?? why's she doing this??? ) don't spend too much money

sav drags him all around south carolina to the best thrift stores she can find and cleo and katelyn are amazed that she can get such fantastic deals on the supermodel clothes she wears

fr she's literally a fashion design major ( + minoring in business management ) and she shows up to class in skilfully done drugstore makeup and an absolutely killer outfit for like 15 bucks

she grew up poor, and she's still poor now, even if she ( thankfully ) managed to scrape a cheerleading scholarship

sav, flicking through a rack of dresses labelled $4 apiece: RIP to little miss rich bitch reynolds but i'm different ;)

no hate to allison she's awesome but she grew up in the lap of luxury surrounded by designer brands so she knows NOTHING about thrifting and rationing money in general

oh and sav and allison have kind of a frenemies thing going on bcs they're both fighting for the top spot of their fashion design course

they spend the whole day shopping and aaron ends up with a highly upgraded wardrobe that contains a lot of cute pastel stuff and sav's promise to do his makeup

aaron insists on paying for dinner at the really nice pizza place a short drive from campus even tho they all protest

and andrew knows he's found new friends, but has no idea that it's the vixens and he's dating one of them. nicky does tho, but he's sworn to secrecy

nicky thinks his new clothes are adorable and is stunned when aaron tells him the total cost

"oh my GOD that girl sounds like a genius."

"yeah, her name's sav. you guys,, would get along, i think."

okay now for the winter break part!!

i think that you can get permission to stay at dorms if you're an international student or something??

anyways since sav's super upset bcs her father straight-up told her not to come home bcs he has a new girlfriend ( god i hate sav's father )

katelyn would stay with her, but her dad can finally have her home in new york for christmas and she really doesn't want to miss it

cleo, the only one with a properly functional family, is going back to her big family house and loving parents and grandma and aunt and siblings and cousins. love that for her.

so aaron and sav are stuck at psu for 2 weeks and aaron's surprisingly cool with this. and sav's excited bcs for the first time since her mom died, she can spend her christmas with someone she actually wants around instead of her shitty-ass father and his constant stream of bitchy girlfriends

they spend a lot of time together, stealing food from the athlete's dining hall to make their own weird combos, which usually ends with aaron making something Cool and Interesting and sav gagging and spitting out whatever strange concoction she had previously insisted would taste good

i literally can't bring myself to give a shit about the twinyards' deal bcs andrew literally became best friends with renee?? and hooks up with guys at eden’s??? idk what's going on there but it's like andrew is trying to control aaron's life while he can do whatever he wants??? and honestly wtf????

also let me just make it clear that i ADORE andrew so so much he's one of my favourite comfort characters ever but i'm not gonna make excuses for his shitty behaviour. i fully believe he heals and puts away his pride to apologise to aaron, nicky, and kevin for his treatment of them

that's definitely not to say that aaron's internalised homophobia isn't eww, but with so many important people in his life gay, he makes a huge effort to get over it

so andrew just thinks that aaron is spending a lot of time in the library or out with nicky or something

and when aaron tells sav about this deal, she's kinda horrified, but it's pretty clear to her that aaron so desperately wants to fix his relationship with his brother, and she's not in any place to discourage him, is she?

the only thing she can do is hope that he won't come out all the worse for it

and stare at the boy curled up on the other end of the pale pink sofa cleo's parents had gotten, wonder just how much shit he'd been put through, and decide she was going to be his best friend

aaron's face has gone entirely impassive. sav nudges his fluffy-socked foot with her own, then reaches out to smooth the crease between his eyebrows. "careful, you'll wrinkle your pretty little face."

aaron is very caught off guard by this, and very promptly flushes bright red, which contrasts with the pale teal hoodie he stole from katelyn

"okay, enough talk about depressing crap. wanna go make christmas cookies now?"

"yeah."

so they make christmas cookies. well, it was supposed to be christmas cookies, but it turns into double chocolate fudge cookies somewhere along the line. neither of them knows how

them baking together is the definition of chaos. they're still blasting songs, and sav is singing along terribly

"yOu'Re A mEaN oNe, Mr. GrInCh," while poking aaron's cheek as he tries to mix something. he throws a handful of flour at her. "yOu ReAlLy ArE A hEel."

anyways obviously sav retaliates and that ends in a flour fight. it only stops when aaron deadass cracks an egg on sav's head and she smears chocolate into his hair

she also tries to make him sing along to baby, it's cold outside

"i'Ve GoT tO Go `wAAyyy~" she holds a spatula up to his face

"go away."

they video call katelyn, who takes one look at the mess in the cramped dorm kitchen and sighs so loudly and dramatically that her dad pops in and asks if everything's okay

aaron freezes up at the sight of him and sav quickly turns off the camera, bcs they both want to make good impressions on him, and being covered in various cookie ingredients just won't cut it, ya know?

the cookies turn out delicious and sav sends all their group chat various photos of the process, most of which consist of selfies with her making goofy faces while aaron is simultaneously baking and flipping off the camera

plus a several videos of sav enthusiastically dancing and mouthing the lyrics of, as follows, all i want for christmas is you, let it snow, and santa claus is coming to town and aggressively pointing a spatula at aaron

"c'mon aari, just sing! please??? please???? please you can do it i believe in you!!"

finally he just. gives up. "okay, you know what? fine, i'll sing to ONE and then you will STOP bothering me you insolent dumbass."

sav beams. santa baby starts playing. aaron is very clearly going through five stages of grief in 0.5 seconds

"go on," sav says sweetly as she slides in next to a pouting aaron, "i'll sing with you."

sav slings an arm around his shoulder and sways with him, so it's just her doing that and him grumpily mumbling the lyrics

and when the cookies are cooling down, they start cleaning the kitchen up. aaron rubs some spilled egg yolk into sav's hair but it goes pretty okay otherwise, since they're just listening to more christmas songs and chatting about light stuff, like aaron's biochem course, sav's fashion course, and their dumb classmates

aaron mostly listens tho, and learns that sav kind of hates allison reynolds for giving up her inheritance when she would do ANYTHING for even the tiniest fraction of that money

but she still thinks allison's gorgeous bcs c'mon

and that sav's dream is to one day open her own boutique!!

aaron spends most of the actual christmas day with the monsters at eden's bcs nicky and andrew wanted to

he spent a lot of the time texting on their group chat

doessavvyisgay: so u just go to a nightclub every week??

unaliveme: i mean yeah, i literally worked here for a while. we needed money and nicky was already working 2 jobs night and day

actualblessing: babe ur backstory is so tragic

unaliveme: i'm a fox for a reason ig

cleo.magda: Yes but-

doessavvyisgay renamed this conversation "aaron miniyard support group"

unaliveme: oh ffs

unaliveme: sav subject change go

doessavvyisgay: i'm at the clothes store what should i get?

actualblessing: something pretty :)

doessavvyisgay: sorry, i can't buy the cashier

cleo.magda: Wow.

doessavvyisgay: I DID GET HER NUMBER THO

unaliveme: lmaooo what's her name?

doessavvyisgay: uh

unaliveme: savannah istg u don't even know her name??

actualblessing: s a v

actualblessing: damn u really do be turning on the Charm tho

actualblessing: respect i didn't even talk to aaron till i asked him for notes bcs he has rly pretty notes and also a rly pretty face

actualblessing: and even then i was like :0

unaliveme: IT WAS CUTE I PROMISE

doessavvyisgay: u 2 = the only valid heterosexual couple

actualblessing: rt

unaliveme: oh shit i'm getting super drunk

cleo.magda: Aaron, you drink? That's not legal, get out of there right now. Kids these days-

unaliveme: cleo u have literally seen me get drunk af,, the first time we met,,, and anyways this is how my family bonds ✌🏻

doessavvyisgay: that's. so damn weird kiddo but go off ig

actualblessing: no go find better things to bond about other than alcohol and weird sweaty dancing

cleo.magda: Yeah, go watch some Christmas movies!

unaliveme: nicky makes us watch die hard every year

doessavvyisgay: see u in hell, kiddo ;)

cleo.magda: I meant things like The Polar Express and Home Alone.

actualblessing: merry christmas ya filthy animals!!

doessavvyisgay: merry xmas y'all i'm gonna go to that christmas party bcs i'm super bored

unaliveme: merry christmas mothers and fuckers

cleo.magda: Merry Christmas, you guys!

[trustsalvatorewriting]

crush culture || kendall knight - chapter one

Summary: In which Kendall Knight has a crush on a girl who plays the drums at a local cafe

Word Count: 2,356

______________

❝ you make me feel like a teenager in love, you make me feel like i'll be forever young❞

KENDALL GROANED AS HE HEARD A CRASH FROM OUTSIDE HIS BEDROOM, throwing a throw pillow over his head to block out the noises and lights. He'd had to go into the studio yesterday for nearly twelve hours trying to fulfill one of Gustavo's checklists, and about halfway through, he'd started developing a migraine. He'd shrugged it off the night before and tried to sleep it off, but it had somehow gotten worse overnight.

    Thankfully, he would have the day off, as he'd managed to get a few harmonies done the day before. He reached toward his navy blue curtains and pulled them over the sunlight leaking in through his window, laying still as he waited for the noise in the apartment to die down.

    It was moments like this that he longed for his life in Minnesota. While he was thankful that he'd been given such a privileged life in California, he knew that if he hadn't gone to the auditions with James six months ago, he would've been at the ice rink at the moment, practicing for a hockey scholarship. He wouldn't have learned the meaning of 'stress migraine,' and he definitely wouldn't have had to leave his apartment to get a decent cup of coffee.

    When he finally forced himself out of bed, he was met with an empty coffee machine and an empty bag of ground coffee. Kendall all but slammed his head into the kitchen pantry, throwing the bag into the garbage disposal and reaching for his phone. In truth, he wasn't even completely sure where the nearest cafe was, but he remembered his mom mentioning that there was a small one at the hippie grocery store on Rosé.

    'God, that's such a Hollywood name,' Kendall thought to himself as he ordered his taxi. Once it confirmed, he quickly changed into a hoodie and jeans, sliding his keys into his back pocket. He headed for the taxi the moment he saw it drive into the parking lot, only giving slight nods to his friends as he rushed to get his coffee.

    Thankfully, the driver hadn't tried to start any conversations, allowing him to sit in the backseat in silence. He leaned his head against the window, shutting his eyes as he tried to block out the sunlight. It felt as though direct sunlight would set fire to the back of his eyes.

    As the driver pulled into the front of the grocery store, Kendall winced at the slight jerking movement of the vehicle as it came to a halt. He handed a fifty dollar bill to the driver and stepped out, pulling his hoodie over his head as he stared at the oddly hippie grocery store, complete with plants hanging outside the building and a green-painted sign with the name 'Williams' painted in white letters.

    Kendall lightly rolled his eyes at the California culture, making his way into the store and heading for the cafe area towards the back. It was a completely different atmosphere from the coffee places and grocery stores they'd had in Minnesota, and while he likely would've figured that out sooner, he'd spent the majority of his time in California stuffed in a recording studio.

    As he approached the cafe, he noticed a few bookshelves towards the wall, filled with journals and cooking books, and whatever else California people liked to read. He walked toward the counter and noticed a short girl sitting behind the register, a dazed look on her face as she rhythmically tapped her fingers.

    "Uh, hey, could I get a cup of coffee?" Kendall asked, pulling his hoodie off his head. He'd made a slight effort to brush out his hair, but had given up after a while and shoved it ebenath a gray beanie.

    The girl snapped out of her thoughts and turned to face him, allowing him to get a view of her name tag: Emory. She smiled happily, soft brown eyes lighting up when she noticed him. "Hi! Welcome to William's Coffee House. What can I get you?"

    An involuntary smile came to his face when he heard her voice, but it quickly faded away when his eyes drifted to the menu. He fumbled with his words as he scanned the list of coffees, complete with lattes and espressos -- and what the hell was a macchiato? Kendall rubbed the back of his neck, confusion painted across his ivory features. "Uh... the coffee... kind?"

    Emory bit back a laugh and went through the buttons on the register. "I'll just get you a small black coffee, and you can add cream and sugar if you want."

    "Thank you," He sighed. He reached to grab a twenty dollar bill from his pocket, but she pushed his hand away quickly. Kendall looked u, dark eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

    "Don't even worry about it. It's on the house," She explained lightly, standing to go prepare his coffee. "You look like you've had a rough day."

    "Is it that obvious?" Kendall questioned, tugging at the edges of his beanie so they covered his temples. They felt like they were going to explode.

    She hesitated, reaching out to hand his coffee cup to him. She pursed her lips together, as if she were searching for the best words to tell him that he looked like he just crawled out from the garbage disposal. Emory winced at her own words as she said, "You're still cute."

    Kendall might've blushed if it weren't for the tightening feeling on the right side of his head.

    As he reached up to press his palms against his eyes, Emory questioned, "Do you have a migraine? I have Excedrin in my bag, if you want some. They're not crazy drugs or whatever."

    "Excedrin?" He pulled his hands away from his eyes to find her holding out a small bottle of acetaminophen. She smiled lightly and placed it next to her coffee. "Thanks."

    "No problem. I carry them around 'cause my brother and I get migraines a lot. One or two should be good depending on how bad it is," Emory advised. Kendall ignored her and shook three pills out of the bottle. "I mean, or you could do that."

    The corner of his mouth twitched into a smile as he went to take the three excedrins and swallow them down with the hot coffee. He winced at the taste, setting it down.

    "Didn't you say you wanted cream and sugar?" Emory questioned, pointing at the cup.

    Kendall deadpanned at the sight of the cream and sugar, throwing his hand onto the desk. Emory giggled and took the cup from him, shaking in a little bit of each ingredient. Her laugh was high-pitched, similar to a cartoon character's. He lifted his head slightly. "Cute laugh."

    Emory dropped the sugar packet into the cup. Her eyes widened and she quickly began preparing another cup. "I'm Emory."

    "Kendall," He responded. "That's a... unique name."

    "Thanks," She chuckled. "My Pops chose it. It's supposed to mean 'brave' or 'powerful' or something. I'm neither of those, which is why I'm working in a nearly empty café at eleven in the morning on a Friday."

    "Three-day weekend," Kendall shrugged and took the cup from her. He smiled, his migraine already beginning to fade away.

    She nodded and sat down in a stool behind the counter. Emory didn't have the nerve to tell him that her dads had named her other siblings 'Silas' and 'Andromeda.' She also didn't have the energy to explain that her dads had given her one mental health day per quarter, and she'd used it today so she could skip out on volleyball. She was only 5'2" which made serving the ball practically impossible.

    For some reason, she'd wanted to impress him. She wasn't quite sure how to do that while she was sitting in a coffee apron, at the back of a grocery store, though. He was genuinely attractive -- the kind that you found on the cover of magazines and billboards. Complete with dirty blonde bangs, deep green eyes, and dimples. As dramatic as it sounded, Emory swore he would be the death of her.

    Kendall stole glances at her as she cleaned up the suddenly messy counter, and pretended not to notice when she glanced back. He hadn't been able to meet a lot of people in Hollywood -- at least, no one outside of the Palm Woods. Gustavo and Kelly had kept him under lock and key in the studio. It had been somewhat justified, of course, considering they were working on an album; but there were times where he missed working at the grocery store in Minnesota. Times where he would've preferred to be playing hockey with his friends, as opposed to learning the same dance moves over and over again.

    God, he felt privileged.

    "So, skipping out on school, pretty boy?" Emory had said it without even glancing up, but he could hear the smile in her words.

    "No, I, uh, have an off-day today," Kendall responded awkwardly. He wasn't sure how to explain that he'd completely forgotten about the essay he had to turn on by three o'clock today. "What about you?"

    "My dads let me take the day off," Emory explained. She caught her words immediately and winced, waiting for the backlash or questions she would inevitably receive. Even in California, the LGBT capital of the world, there were somehow always questions.

    "Dads, huh? What are their names?"

    "Johan and Gerard," She said hesitantly. He would ask about her siblings now, or whether her mom had died, or where she was adopted from. She held her breath.

    "That's cool."

    'What the fuck?'

    "Yeah, they're pretty great," Emory agreed, slightly confused but overall relieved by his reaction. He only gave her a calm look, implying that he was generally unbothered by the topic. She nodded in approval. "So, tell me about yourself, pretty boy."

    "What do you wanna know?" Kendall asked, leaning back in his chair. "I'm from Minnesota; I really love hockey and music; and me and my sister Katie were raised by a single mom."

    "What do you mean by 'you love music?'" Emory squinted her eyes lightly and sat down in the seat across from him, leaning forward. "Do you, like, play any instruments or are you one of those guys that listens to music and says they love it so they look really cool and pretentious?"

    "I'm in a band with my best friends. I think I'm pretty into music," Kendall chuckled. "I play, like, the smallest amount of guitar; but I mostly sing."

    "It's not a band of none of you play the instruments," Emory was quick to point out. "I'm in a small band with my foster sister, Evie. I play drums."

    "You play drums?" Kendall snickered. "And that's not fair. We're mostly singers."

    "Then you're a group, not a band," She shot back. "Yeah, I play drums. Is that hard to believe?"

    "You're just so tiny," Kendall laughed. "I couldn't imagine that."

    "Ever hears the phrase 'you're lucky you're cute?'" Emory questioned, to sing a sugar packet in his general direction. It hit the side of his flannel jacket, and she sighed internally. He was kind of making her eyes hurt at this point. She mentally went over all the reasons that it would be completely unethical for her to ask for his number, then all of the reasons that she would regret not asking for his number.

    Unfortunately, she wasn't given the time to come to a balanced conclusion. Kendall's phone rang and he took it out of his pocket, sending Emory an apologetic look as he did so. The moment he answered it, his mood seemed to falter, and by the end of the call he'd practically slammed his head against the wooden counter.

    "Uh, are you okay?" Emory questioned, lightly poking his shoulder as he hung up his phone.

    "Nope. My producer is calling me into work today, after he promised me the day off yesterday!" He raised his voice and yelled at his phone, despite the fact that the caller had hung up already. He peeked at Emory from between his fingers. "I probably look really weird right now."

    Emory nodded, her nose crinkling as she smiled down at him. "You do."

    Kendall sighed and lifted his head, shoving his phone back into his pocket. He looked at Emory. "I should probably..."

    "Yeah. I wouldn't want you to get fired or anything. A face like that deserves to have screaming girls chasing after it," Emory said. She regretted her words immediately, questioning whether she'd spoken proper English just then.

    If Kendall noticed, he chose not to say anything about it. Instead, he went to stand and took a few paces away from the café. "I'll uh... I'll see you around?"

    'Ask for his number. Ask for his number. Ask for his number.'

    "Uh, yeah! You should visit again. I'll give you a discount on your coffee next time," Emory responded with a smile.

    "Yeah, I will. Uh... thanks, Emmy," Kendall nodded at her, before his phone went off in his pocket again. He groaned and pulled it out, practically yelling into the phone. "I'm coming!"

    Once he was out of sight, Emory groaned and laid her head down on the counter, covering her blushing face. She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Gerard, who was covered in flour and baking ingredients.

    She sighed. "How much of that did you see?"

    Gerard rubbed his daughter's back comfortingly. "You'll get better eventually, Emmy."

    Emory deadpanned, letting out a sigh. The next time she would see him was on the cover of a magazine, being proclaimed the new teen heartthrob.

    If she knew she would get Silas' flirting skills by spending so much time around him, she might've tried to get him kicked out of the house sooner.

[nerdycatastrophe]

Idk did some pixel art and I’m now gonna attach my danganronpa fancharacter biographies because I can :DD (sprite edits, character details and designs are subject to change btw and this very post will be re-blogged everytime I edit something.)

W/ SCARF AND BEANIE

Name and Talent:

Ikani Rinyu, Ultimate Digital/Multimedia Artist

Birth Date and Age:

February 13, 16 years old

Race and Ethnicity:

Polynesian Japanese // Filipino Japanese

Accent:

Japanese, just...japanese.

Blood Type:

A+

Weight and Height:

128 lbs, 5'2 ft

Mental or Physical disorders:

Recovering Pyromaniac (I’m still researching about Inattentive ADHD and if this oc has accurate symptoms) and Peptic Ulcer

Sex, Pronouns and Gender identity:

Biologically Female, Prefer She/Her/Herself & They/Them/Themself or any pronouns & Demi-girl

Sexual and Romantic orientation:

Asexual Biromantic

Religion / Belief:

Agnostic

Other Hobbies:

Cooking, Baking, Making things out of matchsticks and wood and Drawing traditionally.

Likes:

Making digital artworks, playing with match sticks and flowers.        

Loves:

The idea of setting things on fire or being around fire (for emotional reasons and urges) and warmth.      

Dislikes:

Theft-related activity, acidic food and seafood.

Despises:

The idea of water and feeling cold.

Personality type and traits: ISFP

(INTROVERTED;SENSING;FEELER;PERCEIVING)

Personality description:

Ikani is mostly self-aware of reality’s hardships yet tend to keep up an ‘’whatever goes, is what happen and I cannot potentially do anything to change that.’’ carefree, reckless, will only believe when she has seen attitude that pretends to be a healthy optimistic nihilist way of dealing with life but when unmasked turns out to be a faulty uncertain self-hate of pessimism that pretends to be optimistic or a realist way of thinking and solving problems. This can badly affects her creative ability to do any problem solving, thinking outside the box or standing up for herself and the people she loves alone unless she has encountered that situation before or has help from someone with far more experience. She does not rebel that much to authority or dictatorship as she believes rules are rules or the law is the law and whatever unintended consequences that follow or reports of abuse of power are normal and natural but she’s open-minded and adaptable enough to consider changing rules and regulations peacefully if she’s convinced or confident enough. Either way, Whatever happens is whatever happens in the present and she won’t make any effort to neither change or preserve any rules or laws that much. She, most of the time, follows whatever happens in the present world with no consideration for the consequences that would follow because she doesn’t like to think philosophically or overthink.

Habits:

Stimming, flapping hands around, running around in circles when stressed, excited, happy, confused or afraid if she can’t bottle up her emotions, Running away from problems as much as possible (literally and figuratively) and bottling up her feelings. Also tends to get distracted and daydreams a lot yet when it’s her turn to talk about herself she goes a little overboard which can put off people and assume she is selfish. (when it’s just a habit she does)

Character morality alignment:

Lawful Neutral <-> Neutral Good

Name Etymology and Shenanigans 1:

Ikani Rinyu once translated from Japanese to English respectively means ‘’How’’ and ‘’Renew’’ forming the phrase, ‘’How renew.’’

Name Etymology and Shenanigans 2:

Mess with the letters on Ikani and you’ll get ‘’Ikanai’’ which means ‘’Don’t go’’ referring to her brother, ‘’Ika’’ which means ‘’not exceeding’’, ‘’Kanai’’ which means ‘’Flower’’, ‘’Kani’’ which means ‘’crab’’, ‘’Ikan’’ which means ‘’Fish’’, ‘’Ani’’ which is another term for ‘’brother’’ and ‘’Ni’’ which means ‘’to go’’

Name Etymology and Shenanigans 3:

Mess with the letters on Rinyu and you’ll get ‘’Rin’’ which means ‘’Cold’’ in Japanese and ‘’Dignified’’ or ‘’Severe’’ in Italian, ‘’Inu’’ which means ‘’Dog’’, and ‘’Rinu’’ which can mean ‘’Freelance of flowers’’ and ‘’Beautiful’’ or ‘’Pretty’’ in Indian.

Zodiac and Planet:

She is an Aquarius and is assigned the planet Uranus based on her zodiac.

Backstory:

Ikani Rinyu was born as a second child to a worker class family (Rinyu family) who mostly had time for her. Many years went by and her parents had to focus on things they deemed far more important in order to sustain a family with regular income. Her family’s income condition worsened when the day before Ikani 7th birthday, She, her brother and her parents were robbed of a lot of yen at gun-point by a gang after they went to the store and bought a digital tablet for her as a gift (because they felt as if they were neglecting Ikani because of work). After the incident happened, Ikani's mother divorced with her husband because it turned out that Ikani's father had connections with the gang that robbed them and never told her about it. Another reason for her parents divorce is that both of her father and mother had an underlying conflict in which both were never really interested in each other and only agreed to marry back when they were friends so that they can decrease their tax and avoid debt and they both felt guilty about divorcing each other because both felt that they were selfish with their underlying mutual motivations for marriage,  they were still saving up money and investing and couldn’t afford to divorce early, and that divorcing will affect their children greatly if they will be honest about it to them at an early age (suprise suprise, bottling up your feelings worsens everything, yourself and everyone around you). This robbery incident went mainstream after the time Ikani’s mother divorced Ikani’s father and her remaining family was secretly interviewed by a group of ''journalists'' and this is how (insert academy name) found and scouted Ikani just so they can replace and -cover up an ultimate's death.- So her mom and the group of journalists made a contract in exchange for financial gain and basically free education for Ikani and her brother and also medical + financial insurance. Ikani started setting things on fire (mostly flowers, sticks and wood) on ‘’accident’’ just to gain attention from her busy mom, brother and everyone else she was close to and was forming a relationship with, in which her ‘’habits’’ slowly spiralled and developed into impulsive Pyromania because she felt that she was never loved enough + with her parents divorce taking a toll on her (her brother tried to help but also didn't know what to do and was busy with their own school). Around this time, she also felt like eating would decrease her family's money greatly so she tried skipped eating snacks at school but not basic meals yet she still developed peptic ulcer. On her 11th birthday, Ikani’s brother finally took a stand and consulted a ‘’reliable’’ therapist/psychiatrist and a dietician (who helped with the insert academy's goals) despite it being expensive and discouraged by her mom. Her therapist/psychiatrist then noted to her parents that Ikani should focus more on expressing her emotions in more artistic and creative ways in order to cope with her bottled up emotions, trauma and urges and using the digital tablet she got at age 7 when everything was still relatively alright should be a good head start. Her dietician also helped her with resolving her peptic ulcer and convinced her that she shouldn't feel bad about eating extra snacks and set out a diet for her to follow. Soon, The academy’s contract money given to her parents was enough to sustain her creative urges as Ikani eventually learned to create moving and still digital artworks including complex 3d and photography by simply using her tablet that had limited features over the years despite her age as she contributed to many famous and iconic company logos, designs, presentations, artworks, animations, movies, edits and videos that are found in the media. Over the years, Ikani secretly wished that the contract would stop as that diverted corporate's financial wants for themselves because of her hidden relations with the academy journalists and she wishes she was never born and regretted that time she was too ''needy'' at age 7 (she shouldn't blame herself though) but never took her own ground against it to her mom as she felt like she was selfish for wanting to do something her mom didn't desire so she ended up ONLY EVER venting her emotions through her work/hobby and sometimes forgot how to express her emotions.

Reasons for acting the way she does during the killing game:

The reason why she doesn’t vent her emotions and only bottles it up during the killing game is because just like in the original Danganronpa series, Monokuma would confiscate your belongings that allowed access to communicating with the outside world (and it just turned out her only venting item was a digital tablet that would probably screw up Monokuma) Also, it’s because the idea of ‘’Survival of the Fittest.’’, ‘’Being weak will kill you.’’ and ‘’No time for crying because it is not yet over’’ is in her head all the time + fear of being impulsive again and accidentally resurfacing her Pyromania and basically rendering her brother’s efforts to help her with her problems useless so yeah she’s guilty of wanting to feel emotions so she eventually becomes numb to the things happening around her.  All of these are her ways of justifying being emotionless, being unintentionally ignorant and coping with loss and grief in a dangerous game that could kill you any moment.

Student percentile, Predictability and chances:

>Gets killed normally: 30%

>Punished and killed for breaking rules OR due to unfair trial misconduct shenanigans because plot: 4.6%

>ATTEMPTED to murder someone: 20%

>Blackened AND escapes:  10.5%

>Blackened BUT executed:  25.5 %

>Killed someone BUT died during or before their murder trial:  9%

>Betrays everyone as the MASTERMIND: 1.5 %

>Betrays everyone as the MOLE // TRAITOR: 5.7 %

>Survives the killing game as an forever evil MOLE // TRAITOR // MASTERMIND in the killing game: 0.8 %

> Survives the killing game as a redeemed MOLE // TRAITOR // MASTERMIND in the killing game: 0.3 %

>Survives the killing game as a normal person in the killing game:  35%

W/ VISION CORRECTING VISORS

        2. W/ VISION CORRECTING READING GLASSES

         3. N/A EYEWEAR

Name and Talent:

Cyl Bol // Cyden Boliver ^ Ultimate Arcade Attendant

Birth Date and Age:

July 9 ^ 15 years old

Race and Ethnicity:

Dutch Japanese

Accent:

Russian mixed with Dutch and Japanese

Blood Type:

B-

Weight and Height:

100 lbs ^ 5'5 ft

Mental or Physical disorders:

Developing schizophrenia symptoms (I’m still researching on this so I’m not sure) and PAPD (Passive-Aggressive Disorder) and has genetic Albinism + Astigmatism.

Sex, Pronouns and Gender identity:

Biologically male, Any pronouns but They/Them/Themself and He/Him/Himself are preferred, Gender-fluid

Sexual and Romantic orientation:

Toric // Quadrisan or Viramoric

Religion / Belief:

Reformed // Progressive Judiasm (yeah, this the correct term-)

Other Hobbies:

Debate, Internet surfing, Meditation, Reading philosophical/theology books, Practicing first-aid methods and crushing herbs.

Likes:

Salt, Bread, Dieting (fasting), Figs, Bread, Wheat and Grains, Krupnik with meat

Loves:

Philosophy, Theology, Basic human rights, Debating, Eating Chopped Liver 

Dislikes:

The taste of pork (im sorry for adding this if it feels a little bit racist but I genuinely hate pork and I wanted to add it to a character that fits it the most without being too ignorant and stereotypical while still making the character that dislikes pork have an actual personality and backstory other than just RELIGION stuff. keep in mind this character hates pork not because it’s ‘’unholy’’, it’s because it tastes horrible for them), Immature // Karen customers, His own talent, Seeds, Human contact, Getting sick and parties/social celebrations.

Despises:

Strict people, Strict rules, Strict regulations, Dense and stubborn optimists, Peer pressure, Being taunted for being weak // frail, The sun’s warmth and sunlight, Going outside, Backstabbers and being manipulated.

Personality type and traits: INTP

(INTROVERTED;INTUITIVE;THINKING;PERCEIVING)

Personality description:

Really really intentionally and maybe unintentionally paranoid, superstitious, ‘’weird’’ passive-aggressive and lonely since it's his way of avoiding unnecessary conversations that could drain out his energy for him to save up on topics he deems far more important (philosophy + theology) and people that could potentially hurt him again unless they specifically ask him or want something from him for a short // limited amount of time and say it extremely extremely politely to the point where he feels pity or someone out-smarts his passive-aggressiveness causing Cyl to do your favor immediately out of embarrassment, anger, frustration or getting flustered. Most of the time, Cyl has a rather nihilistic and pessimistic (but sometimes, realistic and optimistic at times) views and mindsets of life and would rather die rather than following strict regulations // rules. Although he is a passive type of Nihilist and knows there isn’t that much value in life despite searching it (even with religion), He still is sort of a coward and ends up helping other people out of pity, jealousy, admiration or respect and will still be willing to fight for people’s rights things society deems unworthy despite the odds and his diminishing motivation on doing so. Cyl prefers to be individualistic, thoughtful, overthink for hours, alone and free when it comes to him making decisions or going onto places. Although he’s an INTP, He allows his emotions to run wild at times (even if in the process, hurting other people whether he realizes it or not) which allows him to make thoughtfully calculated decisions without having the burden of emotions and mood. Because of his defiance against the norms, He can usually think outside the box and think of solutions quick enough to solve an underlying problem on time in an creative yet messy analytical manner. Also yeah he struggles following rules.

Habits:

Praying a bit too much than usual, Rapidly cleaning visor goggles // reading glasses even when not needed, Limping hands and fingers to relax hand tendons, muscles and bones and tugging at Hanukkah snow cap when embarrassed / flustered.

Character moral alignment:

Chaotic Neutral

Name Etymology and Shenanigans 1:

Cyl is an abbreviation of ‘’Cylinder’’  which indicates the lens power your doctor is prescribing to correct your astigmatism (and this oc has astigmatism)

Name Etymology and Shenanigans 2:

Bol can be an abbreivation for Broek Op Langedijk (a dutch town), Beacon of light, Bread of Life, Bolivia’s (sounds like Boliver) ISO Country code,  Beginning Of Life and Balls Of Light (paranormal phenominon associated with crop circles) Name Etymology and Shenanigans 3:

Cyden is of English origin and means "To stand strong and be brave together as one" and Cayden is of American origin and means ‘’Fighter’’

Name Etymology and Shenanigans 4:

Bolivar is the name of the South American soldier that had a country (Bolivia) dedicated to him. Oliver is a boy name that means ‘’Descendant Of The Ancestor’’ in English, In latin it means Olive (symbol of peace); peaceful. Olive is a girl’s name meaning ‘’Olive tree’’ and is another symbol of peace.

Zodiac and Planet:

He is a Cancer and is assigned the ‘planet’ moon based on their zodiac.

Backstory:

N/A (ITS ALMOST 2 AM LOL MAYBE TOMORROW)

Student percentile, Predictability and chances:

N/A (ITS ALMOST 2 AM LOL MAYBE TOMORROW)

[journey2betteringme]

Welcome to America

Welcome to America. Land of the free. Home of the American dream, people come here for hope. for equality. For a chance to break through and unity.

But Welcome to America. Land of the need. We emphasize and celebrate those are rich and good and turn an eye on the ones on the street Where is the American dream for them? Those who sit there and plea. Where is the justice, the equality?

Is there a thing called "freedom",

or is that just something that we create in our head? This world we live in hides things that can be hidden, living in a world of hate and racism. Thriving on others faults and uniting only when we are at the depths of need.

Ha, land of the free- free from who? I'm not free, neither are you! Restricted from birth, I am afraid to be who I want to be. I am afraid to me.

Hey mom, I'm gay, I like the V. No child, no you aren't that's not who I want you to be. Dad, I want to play the drums. Oh, but sweetie play softball, play soccer, or bake please. Mom, dad that’s not me, it’s who YOU want me to be.

I'm fat, I'm ugly, I'm a waste of space- or so compared to the models I see on TV or in magazines. I'm 5'2" 136 pounds- I’m short, I’m fat, I’m flawed... There is no gap between my thighs, oh geez! And my stomach, it's not where they want it to be. And there are marks all over my knee!

I've been through turmoil and tragedy, been asked, "why hurt yourself?" but that's when I look at society and say "it's cause of you!"

You America shaped my mom against gays, shaped the image of a girl to what it is today. made me think I'm not pretty and hey! You've trapped me in a box- imprisoned me In this land, land of the free.

I turn to my friends, my family. "Stay strong," they say, but it's not that easy when I look at TV. When I turn to Facebook, to twitter and I see girls my age as me but skinny. They are tan, their smiles are perfect, their.... everything. Perfection compared to me based on society. Stay strong- strong meaning put on a smile. A fake, a phony, a mask to say- but not me.

Once again trapped in this land of the free. America, what have you done to me? All around I read, I hear, I see kids my age hanging from a tree. Bleeding in a tub, crying in a corner, turning to drugs, alcohol, and weed so I think Why not me?

Why not me America? Just add me to your newsfeed! I’m so sorry America that I’m not who you want me to be. I’m not stereotypical with my perfect hair or perfect teeth, I’m sorry I’m flawed. I’m sorry I have scars but why am I apologizing to YOU?

I’m sorry memere that America isn’t what you thought. I’m sorry abuelo that you get ridiculed for doing yard work. I’m sorry it’s not equal, that you aren’t free. But hey America, aren’t I free?

Free to see, to believe, free to be me. No, I’m stuck here between society and who I want to be. In a land where the norm is having the new technology and when you don’t, you’re weird. You’re weird for being smart, for playing the tuba. You’re weird, you’re made fun of, you get trapped. So you have two choices;

Be unhappy in the land of the free in a fake society Or, smile in land of tragedy. This is why our kids go crazy, America you make them that way. Someone once an A++ Student is now shooting up college cause of your views on society. The American dream has changed over years, but I’m tired of change!

Yea America, let me break free. Look at what society has done to me. My curves, my edges, my imperfections make me ME And HELLO, I’m not Miss. America but I’m still deserving to be free!

I mean this is America, am I right? Or has that changed to? Cause if it is, I’m not liking it. And I’ll say it, so long America

Land of the absentees. Land of disagree. Land of who YOU want me to be. Land that’s not for me.

Let me break free, let me be me!

[rksora]

AS OF 2019    ━━━━━━━━        template ┊ @astraofrph  ◞  ❤

❥ ┊ BASIC INFORMATION  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   full name  park jiwon ┊ 박지원

›   pronunciation 

›   meaning

›   reasoning  jiwon is a popular name, her mom wanted her to be popular ( lol joke’s on her! )

›   nickname ( s )

›   preferred name ( s )

›   birth date march 20, 1999

›   age  nineteen

›   zodiac  pisces  ・ water sign ┊ the fish. pisces are sensitive little weirdos. they’re intuitive and emotional, passive, and deeply concerned with what people think of them; they have a tendency to be fairly self-depreciating as a result of this. pisceans are gentle and kind, but pessimistic too, and will easily compromise on their beliefs if they think it will make other people like them.

›   gender / pronouns  female ┊ she / her / hers

›   romantic orientation  biromantic

›   sexual orientation  bicurious

›   nationality  korean

›   ethnicity  korean

›   current residence  hapjeong-dong, mapo-gu, seoul

›   living conditions  adequate to agreeable ┊ practical for a one person

›   trainee title ( s )  little bird

❥ ┊ BACKGROUND  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   birth place  dongjak-gu, seoul

›   hometown  jingwan-dong, eunpyeong-gu, seoul

›   social class  lower middle class ┊ when she was younger she was closer to the poverty line until her mom met her step-dad

›   education level completion @ unnamed high school 

›   father  kim sangil, 50 ┊ business man

›   mother  park yerin, 46 ┊ housewife, part-time at butcher shop  

›   step-father   ham kihyun, 45 ┊ butcher shop owner 

›   half-sibling ( s )  ham jisung, 10 ┊ primary school kid  

›   birth order  ( 1 ) jiwon ( 2 ) jisung

›   children

›   pet ( s ) her brother, jisung, has a pet goldfish and while jiwon has always wanted a dog, she isn’t financially equipped to have one

›   other important relatives

›   previous relationships  ( 16 / 17 ) she dated a boy in high school who took her heart and her purity and threw it into the dirt

›   criminal record

❥ ┊ OCCUPATION & INCOME  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   primary source of income  trainee under kt entertainment ( as of november 12, 2018 )

›   secondary source of income  sometimes her mom sends her money but jiwon sends it right back so her mom compromised and asks her to come home to pick up food 

›   tertiary source( s ) of income  she still gets her checks from the thrift shop because boss yang thinks she can’t take care of herself ( one of these days she’s going to give him a stern talking to !! )

›   approximate amount per year

›   content with their job ( or lack there of ) ? somewhat, she’s neither disinterested or wholly elated. she’s just ... passing time, oddly enough.

›   past job ( s )  jjangtime thrift shop employee

›   spending habits  spends a little too carelessly at the gs25 near her house in hapjeong ; is sad that she didn’t utilize her discount at jjangtime as well as she should have

›   most valuable possession  ... the ‘letters’ she thinks her dad sent her but were really from her mom 

❥ ┊ SKILLS & ABILITIES  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   physical strength she’s 49kg of weak muscle

›   stamina 0 / 10 as referenced through her Fainting at practices

›   teamwork 8 / 10 at teamwork as she’s usually a Follower

›   talents  dancing, faking a Smile, somehow keeping friends even though she’s a pretty shitty friend?

›   shortcomings  gets winded really easily ; doesn’t have a lot of ambition / determination ; feels doubtful and anxious in unfamiliar settings ; does not like Change

›   language( s )  korean ( fluent ), english ( conversational ), ksl ( basic )

›   can they : drive / jump-start a car / change flat tire / ride a bicycle / swim / play an instrument ( and what instrument ) / play chess / braid hair / tie a tie / pick a lock / etc:

❥ ┊ PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS  ━━━━━

›   face claim  park jiwon, fromis9

›   eye color brown

›   hair color ( naturally dark brown / black ) but dyed blonde with hot pink tips

›   hair type / style thin, usually down ; slightly wavy if air-dried

›   glasses / contacts  wears ‘fashion’ glasses that don’t have a prescription, sometimes

›   dominant hand  left-handed

›   height / weight / build  159cm, 5'2" ┊ 49kg, 108lbs ┊ petite

›   exercise habits  prior to working at kt, she had none, but since then has actively gone to yoga every afternoon

›   skin tone  fair / tans easily

›   tattoos

›   piercings  pierced ear lobes

›   marks / scars two moles on her left shoulder blade that looks like a colon ( : )

›   notable features  dimpled right cheek that is prominent whenever she smiles a little

›   usual expression withdrawn, anxious ┊ example

›   clothing style  casual ┊ thrift shop hipster

›   jewelry

›   allergies  bananas, peanuts

›   body temperature  neither runs too hot nor too cold, but does get cold easily

›   diet whatever at the convenience store for Sale is a Go

›   physical ailments

❥ ┊ PSYCHOLOGY  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   jung type  isfp / isfj ┊ emotional af but they don’t show it ; softies at heart ; more attentive than they let on ; still, reading between the lines ain’t their forte ; aesthetics master ; are more spontaneous and fun than they look ; have quirky interests that may shock you 

›   enneagram type

›   moral alignment  chaotic good

›   temperament  melancholic ┊70% ; phlegmatic ┊30%

›   element  water

›   primary intelligence type  intrapersonal intelligence 

›   approximate iq

›   mental conditions / disorders

›   sociability 7 / 10

›   emotional stability  5.5 / 10

›   obsession ( s )  

›   compulsion ( s ) 

›   phobia ( s )  scared of heights ( includes: roller coasters, being high on an escalator, plane, building )

›   vice / addiction ( s ) 

›   drug use

›   alcohol use  2 / 10 ┊ a social drinker who will only drink when around others who are

›   prone to  deprecating thoughts, sarcastic remarks, silently judging from the side, being more Fake than one would expect

❥ ┊ MANNERISMS  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   speech style 

›   accent  slight accent when speaking english

›   quirks  likes to crack her back, gets annoyed easily, wears glasses but doesn’t need them, types texts with her thumb

›   hobbies  dancing, fashion, origami, filming, watching movies, telling ghost stories, 

›   habits  heavy breath that blows her hair away from her face, full pouts, deadpan expression, eye rolls, small fists, constantly apologizing, 

›   nervous ticks  pinching, chewing bottom lip, biting inside of her cheek

›   drives/motivations  wanting to prove people wrong ( 25% )

›   fears  of heights, of never being good enough, of disappointing people who mean most to her

›   positive traits  humble, loyal, selfless

›   negative traits  pessimistic, realistic, blunt

›   sense of humor  sarcastic / memes

›   do they curse often? ... perhaps

›   catchphrase ( s )  “ can you not. ”  /  “ why. ”  /  “ what the fuck. ”

❥ ┊ FAVORITES  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   activity  watching movies

›   animal  capybara

›   beverage  strawberry milk ┊  brown sugar milk tea

›   book

›   celebrity

›   color  black / red

›   designer lol she’s too poor, sorrys

›   food  caramel candies, samgyetang, kimchi jjigae, fried chicken and pickled radish, ice cream

›   flower  sunflower

›   gem  (maybe her birthstone?)

›   holiday  halloween  ∙  children’s day  ∙  black day

›   mode of transportation  normally uses the bus; though, on the weekends is more prone to using the subway

›   movie  can’t buy me love  ∙  the beauty inside  ∙  my sassy girl ∙  100 days with mr. arrogant  ∙  200 pound beauty  ∙  the way he looks  ∙  pulp fiction  ∙  fight club  ∙  moulin rouge  ∙  romeo & juliet  ∙  superbad  ∙  slumdog millionaire  ∙  moulin rouge  ∙  the grand budapest hotel  ∙  the martian  ∙  gone girl

›   musical artist  주영 jooyoung  ∙  크러쉬 crush  ∙  헤이즈 heize  ∙  frank sinatra  ∙  stevie wonder  ∙  아이유 IU  ∙  애쉬뮤트 ashmute  ∙  bevy maco  ∙  콜드 colde  ∙  쎄이 saay

›   quote / saying  expect nothing and you will never be disappointed.

›   scenery  fresh snow on the ground

›   scent  

›   sport  volleyball, i guess

›   sports team

›   television show  the good place  ∙  my fair lady gongshim  ∙  cunning single lady  ∙  meteor garden  ∙  sex education

›   weather  cold / chilly

›   vacation destination  somewhere outside of seoul, preferably easily accessible via a car or bus ride

❥ ┊ ATTITUDES  ━━━━━━━━━━━

›   greatest dream  to get her father to Notice her

›   greatest fear  disappointing those she Loves most, Not being good Enough, being Replaced ( in that order )

›   most at ease when  doing nothing, laying in bed, watching movies

›   least at ease when  trying to adjust to change, in unfamiliar settings, when she says the Wrong thing, foot in the mouth disease

›   worst possible thing that could happen  when she gets her foot in the mouth disease

›   biggest achievement ( currently ) becoming a trainee at kt

›   biggest regret ( currently ) becoming a trainee at kt

›   most embarrassing moment  her mom groveled at @rkxhyunjin​‘s feet to tutor her in front of his entire school during the afternoon

›   biggest secret  she’s a child out of wedlock and her dad pretty much paid her off to not contact him

›   top priorities  ( 1 )  proving to her dad that she’s not a waste of time  ( 2 ) being more considerate of others  ( 3 ) start doing better and taking being a trainee seriously 

[arplis]

Arplis - News: Dudley Stephens Review + Comparison Style Guide (and 20% off Discount Code!)

Our normal Friday post (Weekend Update) has been moved to tomorrow so I can share a VERY exciting post with you guys!! You know I've been loving the Dudley Stephens fleeces for the past year and before the winter really hits (and everything is sold out), I wanted to round up and talk about all of their fleece styles. How they fit, what they look like, which one I like the best... AND I'm sharing a 20% off code tha is valid for TODAY ONLY! So lets get into it... Park Slope: This was my first and favorite style from the bunch. It's just a classic and for a good reason! I would say this is my favorite of the bunch and have it in navy, natural blush, and white. I would say it's their most popular style and I think the easist to style and wear. It has the classic stand up turtleneck that I love for fall and winter, it hits right below the waist and has a roomier fit in the bodice. If you're new to Dudley Stephens, I highly recommend this as your first buy! Sizing: It runs TTS, and I'm wearing a size M Cobble Hill: The Cobble Hill is what Dudley Stephens is known for and what I would call their hero fleece. It is similar to the Park Slope with the same standup turtleneck (that is seriously the best) but is much longer in the body and features a bell-shaped silhouette. It also has two wonderful side pockets along the hem that are larger than you would think (can easily hold a phone and keys). I personally love to wear this with leggings to run out the door in. It's perfect for chilly mornings when I walk the dogs or days when you just want to be comfortable. I don't love it with jeans since it is so much longer and rubs against them -- but that is just my personal preference! I'm 5'6, and it comes well below my butt, so there is no issue when wearing leggings. My hips are also the widest part of my body, and the M, like the above, fits great! The bell shape of the fleece really helps it not feel as tight but also not as boxy since it is longer. Sizing: It runs TTS, and I'm wearing a size M Brighton Boatneck: After the Park Slope style, this is my second favorite of the bunch. The wider neck style makes it really comfortable and easy to wear. I especially love it because it's easy to layer and style with other items! There are times when the turtleneck styles above will rub on my chin or transfer a lot of makeup, but this does neither of those things.  It's very reminiscent of a Jackie-O neckline and has such a traditional feel about it. I love that it's so different than conventional sweaters since it has a small mock neck. It's also great for those (like my mom) who love fleeces like this but don't like turtlenecks! It's the exact same in terms of fit and style as the park slope but just with an open neckline! Sizing: It runs TTS, and I'm wearing a size M Brighton Boatneck in Terry Fleece: Along with expanding their fleece styles, Dudley Stephens is also expanding their fleece materials, and one that is not to be missed is the terry fleece! The regular fleece is what DS calls "vello fleece" and is the traditional fleece material that people typically associate with (but theirs is much softer). It's tightly woven, super warm and made from recycled yarn.  The terry fleece is similar to a sweatshirt material on the inside and a towel like material on the outside so it's really the best of all worlds! I personally love it for all seasons since it's a much lighter material. I picked this one up specifically last spring to help me transition from cold to warm, and it was a dream. The vello fleece is hot and will keep you super warm, so if you're someone who gets hot easily -- the terry fleece is a better option for you! Even better, almost all their styles come in a terry fleece option: the brighton boatneck, the cobble hill, highland high-low, park slope, and the carroll street top. Sizing: It runs TTS, and I'm wearing a size M Brighton Boatneck in Bubble Fleece: In case you didn't love the brighton boatneck style enough, they also have it in a bubble fleece! This is a super soft eyelash like material that is really comfortable and different. I love pairing it with different textures and styles because it just seems to go with everything. I personally have found that this type of fleece has more give to it and stretches out more than the other two styles. It is much roomier than the traditional vello or terry fleece! It is still very warm but also in a strange way more breathable due to the material. In my YouTube video, you can see more of how it's able to be seen through when looked at closely. I personally love to layer this sweater! This sweater (unlike the others) does shed a little when you first wear it. I have yet to wash it, but I'm interested in knowing if it happens after that, as well. If you fall in love with the bubble fleece, you can also check it out in their bijou cardigan style, as well! Sizing: It runs TTS, and I'm wearing a size M. Out of all the styles, this one stretches out the most in the hem and sleeves (which I really like! It like molds to your body).  Highland High Low: This is marketed as a great athleisure piece, and I agree! For the sake of the review, I wore it with jeans so the comparison would be similar throughout -- but I think it would be best worn with jeans. It has a similar boat neck style as the brighton fleece but without any kind of lip or mock neck around it. As the name suggests, it's higher in the front and lower in the back -- but it is not nearly as low as the cobble hill! I would say its right in between both the park slope and cobble hill, in the front and back of the fleece. It also has a full front pocket like a great sweatshirt does! I personally think this is my least favorite of the bunch (as of now), but I do want to try it out more going to and from the gym! I just think that where it hits on my frame isn't the most flattering of their styles. I'm not wearing the right pants with it, but I did think it was a bit tighter in the hips than I wanted! Sizing: It runs TTS, and I'm wearing a size M. Calyer Cowl Neck: I love the look of this as it's much more dressed up and formal (I think) and gives a very ~fancy~ lady vibe lol. I can totally see my sister wearing this all the time since her style is more formal than my own. I feel like this would be an excellent option for the office or events during the fall and winter when you need to look a little more dressed up.  At first, I did find the neckline hard to place on my own, but after a few wears, I got it down. Above, I wore it two different ways: one more taught and on my shoulders and the other a little looser above my shoulders. I do have to admit I love the way this style pictures and how I look in it.  I wouldn't wear it with jeans because it is tight in the hips -- I think either a great skirt, skinny work pants or leggings would be a great pairing with this style! Out of all the fleeces, I would say this one does run the smallest. As you can see, it is very tight in the hips -- not too tight, but tight enough! It does come right at the bottom of my butt, which is great to wear with leggings.  The calyer also has side pockets (similar to the cobble hill) and, unlike all the others above, has a 3/4 sleeve, which I think is a subtle difference! I think it would be too much with a full sleeve -- this makes it seem a lot more feminine and compliments the overall silhouette.   Sizing: I would say it runs on the smaller side but I am still wearing an M, and this is the right size for me. If you are larger in the hips and want it roomier, I would suggest sizing up.  -------- And here comes the fun part!!! I reached out to the Dudley Stephens team and asked if they had any promos going on, and they (graciously) offered a 20% off code that is valid FOR ONE DAY ONLY! So if you're one of the lucky ones reading this on October 18th, then use code: BASES20 for 20% off your entire order. The code is valid from 7am ET to 11:59pm ET, so get to shopping!!! If you're here past the coupon code date, you can click here for $25 off your first order at Dudley Stephens! Dudley Stephens Sizing: I'm 5'6/150 and an M/6 in almost everything I wear. For all the items above, I took an M, and it was perfect. I truly believe all Dudley Stephens pieces run TTS and, if anything, size up to give you more room. The only item that was close to being "too small" would be the cowl neck, but even that was just fine! The largest part of my body is my hips, and I've had no issue! I'm usually a 28/8/L in pants. Same goes for my bust, I'd a 34DD and didn't think anything was too tight across my chest. For sure, stick with your normal size. They do not shrink when washed (they suggest not drying them -- but rather hang dry). On their FAQ page, they do mention that it's best to size up if you're over 5'9 and size down if you're under 5'2. They also share a size chart if you're curious about traditional size comparisons! Dudley Stephens Rewards: DS also recently launched a rewards program that can help you save on future purchases! Just by signing up, you can get 100 in pineapple points (where every point = $1). You can also gain points by reading their blog, following on social and sharing your birthday (which in total can get you $250 points aka $25 off). If you're looking to give your support and also save a few bucks, this is a great option for you!! If you're here past the coupon code date, you can click here for $25 off your first order at Dudley Stephens! Dudley Stephens Q&A: Q: Which style is the most office-appropriate? A: I think the Calyer cowl neck and the Brighton boatneck are the most office-appropriate if your office leans more on the formal side. I worked in a super casual office, and I wore my Park Slope style all the time, and it was great! Q: Are they really worth the price tag? A: If you can afford it, yes! Just like with anything I promote, if you have the money and you believe you'll wear it, yes, it is worth the price tag. I was debating over it for a long time and finally just pulled the trigger to see what it's all about, and I couldn't stop wearing it. I know a lot of girls who have them and swear by them. There is a reason they have such a strong and engaged following! It's also why they're never in stock -- they are that good! To save some money, you can use the code "BASES20" for 20% off (today only), or you can sign up for their rewards program and save that way as well! Q: How do they wash/hold up? What is the wash/care for the fleece? A: For wash, they suggest you wash inside out with like colors and hang to dry. On their FAQ page, they say to avoid bleach, washing with towels, ironing, dry cleaning, fabric softeners. They hold up really well in the wash, and (dare I say) get softer and more worn-in overtime!! Q: Do they pill? Does it shed or attract lint? Is it static-y? A: They do not pill, and I've never had issues with static! In terms of lint/pet hair, they do pick up a normal amount over time (pictured below is my most worn + washed fleece). But it's nothing out of the ordinary for a fleece material. If you're worried about something like this, I would suggest getting a mid to light color like the natural blush or the camel color! Q: Do they have any stretch? A: They stretch some overtime, but nothing very noticeable. I like that they keep their true shape and are more form-fitting than baggy. Out of all the styles I've tried, I think the bubble fleece boatneck stretches the most (in the sleeves and hemline/bodice). Q: If I'm top heavy, will it make me look frumpy? What is the sizing like?  A: I don’t think it will, but you know your body best! I'm a 34DD, and you tell me if I look frumpy or not (as I think I have a larger chest). All the styles are more form-flattering than you would think for a fleece sweater. I do suggest scrolling through their Instagram as they feature a ton of women and their different bodies so you can see someone similar to you and how it looks on them! Q: What piece and color do you think is the most versatile? A: In terms of versatility, I think it would be the Brighton boatneck -- just because the wider collar makes it great for layering and showing off a lower collar underneath (like this post!). For color, this is obviously very personal in terms of your preference, but I think the natural blush is a great color! Q: Are they tight in the hips? A: Some styles are tighter than others like the Highland high-low and the Cayler cowl neck. The park slope and the Brighton boatneck hit just above/at the hips, so there is no issue, and the cobble hill has a bell shape to accommodate the tush! Q: How warm is it? A: It's SO WARM! Like get ready. It's perfect for fall and winter. But if you run hot, I suggest checking out the terry fleece as it's a lighter fleece option. Q: What does the material feel like? A: It's super soft and feels like a really nice fleece blanket that just hugs you all day long lol.  Q: Do I need to size up if I want to layer? Or will it make me look frumpy? A: I've been able to layer just fine without sizing up. The sleeves will get tighter, but that's the case with all sweaters. I personally like to layer these fleeces with lighter material items or sleeveless tops (with fun collars, so they peek out). I don't know how it will look in terms of frump, but I suggest to always get your normal size because it would be how you'd wear it the most! Q: Can you compare the two types of fleece options for me? A: Yes! I talked about it a little above under the Brighton styles but here is how they listed out all four(!) of their fleece styles: Classic Vello Fleece — Soft, tightly woven, and warm, this fabric is most like the “traditional” fabric people associate with fleece (but ours is extra cozy!).  Double-Layer Vello Fleece — Like the Classic, only doubled up for extra warmth and softness.  Terry Fleece — Think sweatshirt fabric (the most luxurious sweatshirt you can imagine), this versatile, four-season fabric has a hook-and-loop texture that’s almost towel-like. Absorbent and water-shedding like one, too.  Ribbed Fleece — Silky-soft and dimensionally textured, our ribbed fleece (launching in May 2019!) is lightweight and quick-drying for four-season versatility. Q: Do the collars keep their shape? Can you roll them down? A: Yes, they do! They are great at holding their shape, and the only time I've seen a difference is with the terry fleece. It still stands tall without issue but can buckle in depending on how you're wearing it. For all styles, whenever you wear a jacket or vest, it can get ruffled, but that is normal for any turtleneck. And yes, you can roll down the cobble hill and park slope styles without any issue (I shared that in my YouTube video!) #PromoCode #Fall #FallFashion #Shopping #Fashion

Arplis - News source https://arplis.com/blogs/news/dudley-stephens-review-comparison-style-guide-and-20-off-discount-code

[puppybaby15]

Majutsu ref + bio

CRITIQUES WANTED

Note- This is a completely outside of the Sonic universe, in this universe none of the canon characters exist neither do the Chaos Emeralds. In this universe there are mobians but it's more on the mirror of human life with more magic intertwined.

Name: Majutsu (ma-JU-stuu) Jade Bernwebb

Species: Black wolf

State of origin: Bagloins (think of a Place deep in the midwest southern area in the USA) Age: 26 Occupation: Private readings and magic sessions at home, Antique store for the main income.

Info about sexuality/relationship status: With developed trust issues from her past, it's almost impossible to have a relationship (be it female or male) without her anxiety or any other emotional issues getting in the way. She has been in several relationships (male and female), but they were more focused on sex or to short to be considered a relationship (i.e 3-4 months).

Height: 5'2 (i found matching weight, height, and built in normal mobian heights was very challenging) Weight: 169lbs Likes: Alone time, magic, reading, sweets, affection/being affectionate, horror movies, body modifications, video games, cute and sparkly things, gore (but only behind a screen or on paper), make-up, dark humor and colors. Dislikes: Needles (that's why she doesn't have tattoos, unlike piercings where the needle is in and gone in a second), confrontation, being in crowded areas, being in intimate relationships, having to talk to someone new, talking to or about family and childhood, being social. Facts: Majutsu's wolf instincts constantly make her want to be more social and sometimes enjoys social situations, but she still loves being alone. She does have some basic mental issues (that I have because of a simular past with emotional/mental abuse) like anxiety, social phobia, and depression. She can get easily annoyed and can't control her emotions like her mother. Personality: She can be lazy and is very introverted. She is very insecure and anxious when with a new person, always watching what she says no matter how much her head screams. Timid and paranoid in crowded areas, checking around to see if there was a family member. After she gets to know someone well she could be very outgoing and relaxed, cracking dark jokes even. (im not sure if i shouId add a weakness secion since they are kinda sprinkIed throughout this bio)

Backstory:     Born into a very conservative trailer park pack she was the youngest out of 10 siblings. In this trailer park lived Majutsu's extended family on her fathers side, "a pack sticks together" was their moto but it was far from true. Everyone there mind their own buisness in their trailer and not cared for anyone else. Her mother and father were already struggling with the first 2 kids they have, but with them being against contraceptives they had 8 more children. Stress stricken her parents and that effected how they parented and the fact that there were to many mouths to feed made it worse. Majutsu's parents had a way of thinking of "ok I fed, bathed, and clothed this child that's all I need to do to raise them" which simply wasn't true. (sorry I gave a bit of backstory to the backstory)   Every morning Majutsu and her siblings would wake up to their mom's blood curdling screech, as protocol the children did their best to stay out of her way as she went to go find her brush, take her shower, make her coffee, and smoke her cigarette. This trauma made all of the children very light sleepers. Please note that these are children with sensitive hearing, and the oldest being 12 at the time, so it would take a toll on them. Their parents thought nothing of it because they treated the children as if they were adults and could comprehend the situation well. Since there was rarely any discipline between sibling and sibling many fights broke out and many didn't stop until a child was bleeding, something was broken, or it kept their parents up at night. Since Majutsu was the youngest she was picked on the most out of the bunch, usually getting yelled at for the smallest things just for laughs. She wasn't the only one they did this to but to her young mind it effected her the worst, causing her to blaim herself for the smallest of things and making her paranoid of if she did or said something wrong. With all of the violence happening inside the trailer CPS was called to the home a couple of times from concerned teachers, but those were dismissed by my fathers excuse of "oh kids will be kids, they rough house a lot," and since the parents weren't physically abusing the children there technically wasn't anything wrong. It didn't stop them from getting the Bernwebb family a social worker, since they did live in a small trailer with a big family and her parents were working at minimum wage. When Majutsu was 11 there was a celebratory barbecue for her sister's graduation, her mother and her uncle sat beside eachother on a bench talking about things adults talk about, Majutsu walked to them and sat between them. Her father glanced at them causing him to do a double take, something seemed very wrong as they sat together. Majutsu had many of her uncles facial features and even his eye color. Her father tried to brush it off saying that this happened, some kids end up looking like their aunt/uncle or their grandparent more then their actual parents. This still racked at his mind and he started to confront her mother about it, causing arguments to emerge. As if it were normal, whenever the children did something, anything, wrong they would get humiliated in front of the rest of the family and get called horrid names from their mother. Or when the female child didn't dress exactly how their mother wanted she's call them ugly, criticize their weight, and accuse them of being homosexual. At this time that's when siblings started to betray one another, telling secrets and embarrassing their brother or sister to get props from their parents, most were on Majutsu and her older brother who's the second youngest. By the time Majustu was 12 she started to develop an eating disorder, when she was sad, which became often, she'd eat until her stomach hurt making her gain weight. Since puberty was starting for her, her hormones kept the weight on. This made her develop body dismorphia and wanted to wear clothing that made her look thin, like dark colors. With her life as a, for a lack of a better word, repeative hell she decided to go try and find something to distract her. One of her close friends from school gave her a book as a late birthday gift "it's a novel about a princess who uses magic to save the universe." Maj was sceptical but she found her holy grail, she grew an intence interest in magic and would try to find out as much as she could. It took her the courage at 15 to steal a book of basic magic from a thrift store, she read and she learned. Practicing the spells outside during the night to make sure no one saw, most attempts ended up in explosions and burnt fur.  With the explosions she could easily hide under her families trailer before anyone could see. Even with the failed attempts, it made her happy, she could finally do something her family couldn't do and it was special to her. Unfortunately for her, she got to cocky at the age of 17 and her uncle caught her practicing. With her parents closed minded beliefs they threw the book away and screamed at her, it didn't stung as badly as it did when she was 5-13, but it still hurt. She feel back into her depression and stayed in her room all day. By now she would be the only one sleeping in it, all her other siblings have graduated and left as fast as they could. She didn't blaim them one bit. She finally moved out  at 18 it was a huge weight lifted off her shoulders and she could breathe. The problem was, whenever she looked in the mirror all she saw was her mom, her dad, brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, uncles, and she cried. She slid down the bathroom drawer and cried, all she knew was them and she hated it. It took a few days to adjust to the roomy loneliness, it was way better than being crammed into a small room with 6 other girls. She saved up her money and started to buy magic books again and went back to perfecting her skills, meeting some other magic addicted mobians on the way. For her 20th birthday her friends took her to an alternative store. She quickly found out what body modifications were and she fell in love at first sight, but she hated the feeling of the needles going inside her ear.  She picked out some fur dye and smiled at it "don't have to be a part of the pack anymore" she whispered to herself. After a few hours she finally got out of the shower and looked in the mirror, she finally saw herself as beautiful. She couldn't stop smiling from ear to ear. She was happy.

[embur]

all evens 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

i'm just doing them all bc i don't feel like deleting every other question on mobile (too difficult imo)1: How tall or short do you wish you were?like 5'2-4"
2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not)nice cat
3: Do you have a favorite clothing style?v lazy n comfortable
4: What was your favorite video game growing up?honestly i have no clue what games i played or what i did for fun At All until the age of 9 so imma go w that game: wow
5: What three things/people do you think of most each day:idk i only ever think abt what's immediately pertaining to me
6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say?idk
7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]?no person
8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]idk
9: Are you ticklish?ya
10: Are you allergic to anything?Dust and Dogs and Cats
11: What’s your sexuality?lèsbian
12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?cocoa
13: Are you a cat or dog person?idk imma say cat even though i never had one
14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson?elf, they seem the normalest n i don't wanna change into the other 2
15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber?cārlsāgān42 minus the -'s
16: How tall are you?5'8-9"
17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to?i already changed it to colleen so idk that was all my creativity
18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]like 200 + tax
19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?sure
20: Do you like space or the ocean more?space
21: Are you religious?idk
22: Pet peeves?my mom
23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]?diurnal bc that's what everything is based off of for hyumans
24: Favorite constellation?idk
25: Favorite star?idk
26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?not if they he creepy ones
27: Any phobias or fears?bugs, trýpóphóbíá, loud people esp men
28: Do you think global warming is real?ya i don't have to Think it though
29: Do you believe in reincarnation?i hope it happens but idk
30: Favorite movie?imma say wreck it ralph
31: Do you get scared easily?ya
32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?2 dogs but they died
33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.]99999999/10
34: What is a color that calms you?pastel colors idk
35: Where would you like to travel and/or live?everywhere for both of possible
36: Where were you born?gretna
37: What is your eye color?grayish
38: Introvert or extrovert?introvert
39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs?sure
40: Hugs or kisses?hugs
41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now?christina
42: Who is someone you love deeply?christina
43: Any piercings you want?some on ears, maybe something more idk
44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?piercings mainly
45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so?no
46: Talk about your crush, if you have one!nice
47: What is a sound you really hate?my moms bfs dog whining at my door when i didn't ask to be left home alone w her
48: A sound you really love?silence
49: Can you do a backflip?into/in a pool ya
50: Can you do the splits?nope
51: Favorite actor and/or actress?idk
52: Favorite movie?wreck it ralph didn't they alrdy ask this
53: How are you feeling right now?kinda bad as usual
54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?a darker brown
55: When did you feel happiest?idk
56: Something that calms you down?asmr videos
57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]idk What but imma say yes, at the least i know i got depression
58: What does your URL mean?i like it bc it's short
59: What three words describe you the most?bad bad bad
60: Do you believe in evolution?don't have to
61: What makes you unfollow a blog?almost anything
62: What makes you follow a blog?a lot of people i follow follow it
63: Favorite kind of person:nice
64: Favorite animal(s):cat dog idk
65: Name three of your favorite blogs.idk
66: Favorite emoticon:💕
67: Favorite meme:idk specifically
68: What is your MBTI personality type?intj
69: What is your star sign?capricorn
70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?no
71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most?t shirt n gym shorts
72: Post a selfie or two?nei takk
73: Do you have platform shoes?nope
74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?i have no life
75: Can you do a front flip?on a trampoline or into/in a pool
76: Do you like birds?sure
77: Do you like to swim?sure
78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?swimming
79: Something you wish didn’t exist:evil
80: Some thing you wish did exist:more goodness
81: Piercings you have?none
82: Something you really enjoy doing:laying down
83: Favorite person to talk to:idk abt picking favorites between friends feels bad
84: What was your first impression of Tumblr?sux
85: How many followers do you have?23
86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes?ya
87: Do your socks always match?ya
88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely?ya
89: What are your birthstones?blue topaz
90: If you were an animal, which one would you be?human
91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be?idk
92: A store you hate?costco, i never been there but it feels Wrong
93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?as many as i'm given idk
94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?fly
95: Do you like to wear camo?No.
96: Winter or summer?winter bc it doesn't get That cold here n all the bugs die
97: How long can you hold your breath for?idk i rarely test that
98: Least favorite person?my dad i guess
99: Someone you look up to:anyone who's taller than me
100: A store you love?idk
101: Favorite type of shoescrocs
102: Where do you live?nèw òrlèàns
103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why?no
104: What is your favorite mineral or gem?alexandrite
105: Do you drink milk?ya
106: Do you like bugs?No.
107: Do you like spiders?No.
108: Something you get paranoid about?if i'm a bad person
109: Can you draw:yes, but def not well
110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked?idk
111: A question you hate being asked?idk
112: Ever been bitten by a spider?nope
113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach?not particularly
114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?cloudy
115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now:christina
116: Favorite cloud type:i can't remember the name but the puffy ones
117: What color do you wish the sky was?the same color as now
118: Do you have freckles?i guess
119: Favorite thing about a person:how nice they are
120: Fruits or vegetables?neither bc i'm unhealthy but fruits of i had to
121: Something you want to do right now:i'm not gonna put that on here
122: Is the ocean or sky prettier?sky
123: Sweet or sour foods?sweet
124: Bright or dim lights?dim
125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature?idk
126: Something you hate about Tumblr:everything
127: Something you love about Tumblr:mine friends
128: What do you think about the least?idk i barely honk abt whatever it is
129: What would you want written on your tombstone?rest in peace
130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now?myself
131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself?being trąns and lęsbįąn, or i guess i'm Made to hate myself for those things
132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures?ya
133: Computer or TV?computer
134: Do you like roller coasters?sure
135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness?ya
136: Are your ears lobed or attached?lobed
137: Do you believe in karma?idk
138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are?1 or 2
139: What nicknames do you have/have had?collie
140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends?i dont think so
141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink?ya
142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others?i hope good but idk
143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help?both
144: What makes you angrya lot
145: How many languages do you speak fluently?one
146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries?girls
147: Are you androgynous?i would rather be
148: Favorite physical thing about yourself:nothing
149: Favorite thing about your personality:nothing
150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person.trent stephanie christina
151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose?this one?
152: Do you like BuzzFeed?no idk
153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.]
154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons?i think head kiss is better
155: Do you like to play with others’ hair?ya but more so them playing w my hair
156: What embarrasses you?everything
157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious:everything
158: Biggest lie you have ever told:idk
159: How many people are you following?156
160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)?idk
161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)?105
162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)?idk
163: Last time you cried and why:i don't remember when/why
164: Do you have long or short hair?long for a boy short for a girl
165: Longest your hair has ever been:however long it is now
166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon?idk
167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created?no
168: Do you like to wear makeup?idk i've never worn it yet
169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds?i don't think so
170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully?i hope i did

[chroniclesofawkwardness]

Greg(g) and the Giant Peach

"Whelp, Gregg Allman died today."

This was not how I expected the silence to be breached. (I had to do a quick check of YouTube to confirm that Gregg spelled his name with two gs at the end. To those of you who grew up eating peaches or tied to the Whipping Post, I apologize.) It's not like "Ramblin' Man" was on the radio, or we were discussing icons of 70s rock music. My Uber driver and I had just reached one of those awkward lulls in conversation that so many people fear and so few can enjoy.

"I'm sorry to hear that," I said, both taken aback that Larry and his 4.8 stars had chosen to restart our conversation like this, and truly at a loss for words. The only thing I can think of that would have made Larry tell me that is that maybe I'd told him about my love of cooking, which sent his mind spiraling out of control until it crash-landed on a memory of the time he and his wife were in of Emeril Lagasse's restaurants in New Orleans and Gregg Allman happened to be there at the same time. Maybe Larry's wife (or Larry himself) had special memories of "Jessica," or "Melissa." (There's an original idea: Songs about girls.) Maybe these were not only songs the Allman Brothers sang, but also the names of Larry and his wife's daughters. I'll never know. I haven't had a chance to ride with Larry again. My snarky self wanted to say something terribly insensitive like, "Does this mean they finally caught the midnight rider?" For me, it's never "too soon" but I didn't think of it until after he'd already dropped me off, and I'd added a tip to the cost of my fare.

This missed opportunity left me wondering what it is about me that makes people like Larry seemingly want to tell me anything, or why finance representatives from Kroger want to approach me, a nondriver, about their credit card, with which I'd earn double fuel points...

I try not to be a dick most of the time, but I also don't have "Gullible Cherub" tattooed on my ass. Maybe it's in the way I present myself to the world. Maybe I smile too much, or it's because I have the genetic misfortune of being one of the few people 5'2'' Srinivas can look directly in the eye.

With all due respect Mr. Allman, I'll pass on your peach, and Srini, I'll pass on the credit card. Peaches have made me unreasonably uncomfortable for years, and my credit score has just risen by three points according to Credit Sesame. I don't want to mess with a good thing, and I've hated peaches (just peaches, not peach-flavored things) for so long, that I don't know how to function without the discomfort they cause me.

I can hear you saying, "How dare you to talk shit about the dead. Gregg was just doing what he loved. How many concerts have you given? How many albums have you released?" The answer would be zero and zero respectively. Before you label me as a hater, hear me out. In a strange way, Larry's random comment about Gregg Allman's passing brought me some hope. I began to think that maybe my irrationally strong disdain for peaches may be misplaced. I'm just entertaining the thought, I'm not ready to have a come-to-Jesus moment with peaches, and break down sobbing like someone who's just been saved as a consequence of a Mormon baptism, or just watched the end of "The Shawshank Redemption." I still need my pain, like Dr. House. But, if The Allman brothers can get away with creating an album called "Eat a Peach" where cover art is little more than a truck with a giant fucking peach in the back, and songs about girls like Melissa and Jessica when that's the last thing the world needs, maybe I can get away with writing this book. In the beginning, the odds have to be stacked against any song or book being written, or album making it out of the studio. If Gregg can do it, there's no reason I can't too.

My dad's name is also Greg, but with one g at the end. He was never a big fan of the Allman Brothers Band. Or, more accurately, if he was, he never admitted it to me. I don't have any memories of us bonding while cruising down the highway in his 1987 Cutlass that permanently smelled of cigars with "Ramblin' Man" blaring on the stereo. He preferred to butcher either "Witchy Woman" by The Eagles or "Barbara Ann" by The Beach Boys while behind the wheel. He never read Roald Dahl's "James and the Giant Peach" to me. And that's okay. He would just ask me how school was a dozen times a day without even looking up from the newspaper, and then pose the same question (or tell my mom to ask me) an hour later as if nothing ever happened.    

I do remember one of his, particularly odd attempts at father-son bonding.

When I was about eight years old. He came to my bedroom door at the crack of dawn on a Wednesday and whispered my name.

"Dave... Hey Dave... Are you awake?"

"What is it, dad? I have to get up for school soon."

"I thought I'd show you how to use the jumping boards on Super Mario Bros."

"What? Why? Er... Okay. I guess..."

I was surprised he'd taken an interest in me for any reason other than my report card. Even my eight-year-old self knew that was messed up. Still, I thought I'd better take advantage of the opportunity to spend time with my father over something asinine before I did something equally or even more mundane in the days to come, like forgetting to get ground beef out of the fridge so it would be thawed out in time for dinner. In most corners of the universe, this would be considered a minor annoyance, but in our house, it would be enough to cause Greg to pout (or do whatever it was that he did) for an extended period of time. If I did anything he didn't like, he would most likely retaliate by not speaking to me for days on end. Given my well-documented issues with timely flesh removal, eight-year-old me must've been like:

"Screw it. He feels sorry for me and my Mario struggle. The least I can do is humor him by pretending to pay attention for five minutes. He's seen me hopelessly bouncing straight up and down on those stupid jumping boards for weeks. I'm lucky he even lets me play Nintendo. He once threatened to ban me from playing almost as soon as we took the console out of the box since I threw away the receipt for it before we were even out of Toys 'R Us. (When I heard that Toys 'R Us would be closing all of its stores, the receipt incident came back to me.) I shouldn't deny him the chance to shoot his parenting shot. After all, he did play with my character on The Legend of Zelda last week. My guy's wearing white armor now instead of the beginner's green. He's trying, at least in Nintendo's 8-bit fantasy world. This means he can't be an irredeemably terrible person in real life, right?"

Well...

Disclaimer: My eight-year-old self was capable of deep thought, but I don't know if I could have spelled irredeemably correctly at that point in my life. That said. thirty-eight year old me thinks polysyllabic adjectives are sexy.

You're welcome.

I'm sure Gregg Allman brought joy to his fans, and no one should be disparaged for doing something he or she enjoys. The last time I saw the other Greg, his first words to me were, "Dave, I left my goddamn clothes at home." Not, "Hi son. How's it going," or "How 'bout a hug?" Nope. "Dave, I left my goddamn clothes at home." I haven't spoken to my father in almost six years you see. He lives in Indiana with his wife that he met online before it was cool. I don’t need all of the fingers on both my hands to count the number of times I’ve seen him in the past twenty years. To be honest, given both the spatial and temporal distance between us, if he actually tried to hug me or ask me about my life, I'd probably just run for the nearest set of headphones to avoid answering the question or feeling the awkward embrace. I'll take my goddamn clothes, thank you. Anything less would be obviously atypical and ineffective. I had no desire for a picket fence or games of catch in the front yard. I don't feel cheated because we didn't sing along together to Jessica or Melissa. Greg taught me a valuable lesson. Life's not fair. People don't always get what they deserve. They get what they get. Wait... Did I learn that from my dad, or a TV show? It's hard to say. Greg had a nearly thirty-year career in law enforcement and corrections, which meant he was constantly surrounded by people who had made horrible decisions, thus he had ample opportunities to pass real-world wisdom on to his sons instead of watching them soak up the Hollywood-crafted kind. Still, it's hard to take someone seriously who's biggest regret is never having been featured on COPS.

I know now that if you're going to be successful using the jumping boards in Super Mario Bros., you have to get a running start in order to clear the obstacle that demands their use, but I still don't know why strangers who drive me around when I request rides through ridesharing apps like Uber and Lyft seem to have an easier time opening up to me than the man whose roof I lived under for eighteen years. Maybe I'll never know. I think the difficulty knowing lies in the burden of expectation. Watching too many movies made me think, as a child, that my dad would one day come home and play catch with me, or at least encourage me to get involved in team sports. Watching too many Ohio State football games made my dad wish I'd grow up to be the Buckeyes' next great middle linebacker. Neither of us lived up to the expectations one supposedly had of the other, but I suppose the greater tragedy is not living up to the expectations you place upon yourself, or not having the courage to place expectations upon yourself at all. Sometimes, you just have to cut ties with people who don't want what's best for you, even if that person is a member of your family.

I don't hate my father, but he's a stranger to me, just like Gregg Allman, and the Uber driver who told me of his passing. All three men are parts of my past.  Do memories twist, and fade? Sure. I hope that when Greg dies, I don't have to hear about it from a stranger, but I'm prepared for the possibility, and I'm fine with that. A coworker once told me that holding a grudge is like letting someone live in your head rent free. If that's true, may the floodgates of revenue open soon. I don't hold grudges, I hold stories.

Thanks for the memories Gregg. Thanks for the memories, dad.