#negan x reader x joel miller

[mrsnegan]

Get down tonight

Pairing: Negan x f!Reader x Joel Miller

Summary: You spot Negan and Joel watching you on the dancefloor and decide to have a little fun.

Warnings: smut, reader is a bit drunk but fully invested in this little banter, making out, praise kink, semi-public fingering, finger sucking, mentions of threesome (f/m/m)

Author's note: Well, I can't help myself with these two. Why do they make me feel so damn horny all the time? 😅 And those matching gifs on top of that. Enjoy reading. 😊

The bass travels through your body, electrifing every nerve ending, making you sway to the beat of the music. Drink in hand, you lose yourself, eyes closed, cheeks heated from the alcohol and atmosphere of the club.

When the song changes, you open your eyes again, instantly feeling the gaze of someone on you. Your eyes scan the people surrounding you, but only when you look farther towards one of the booths, you see him, or better, them. Handsome, older, both drinking you in from afar.

Heart fluttering wildly, you bite your lip, swaying your hips, raising your drink.

They briefly look at each other before raising their beers too, taking some gulps before their eyes are fixed on you again.

The buzz of the alcohol makes you bold, dancing a bit more suggestively, giving them a show, searching for their reactions from time to time. One of them smirks openly, pursing his lips in amusement, while the other drinks you in with a hardened gaze, hand twitching in his lap.

Arousel spreads through your body, the liquid heat between your legs definitely ruining your panties.

You've never done something like this before. Well yes, you've definitely flirted with men at bars or in clubs, danced with them, kissed one or two. Though this time, you risk it all, driven by liquid courage and all-consuming desire. With one last look into their eyes, you point your head into the direction of one of the dark corridors, wink at them and turn around.

As the music grows duller, your heartbeat picks up its pace, hands sweaty. You lean against the wall at the end of the corridor, a door to one of the staff rooms to your right. There is no one around but you, until you hear footsteps approaching you. This is stupid, you think for a second, definitely a way those horror movies start, but your mind feels blissfully light, your body electric.

Both men stop some feet away from you, giving you a chance to take them in from head to toe despite the your dimly lit surroundings. One of them, the one with the smirk still plastered over his face, wears a fitted white tshirt and blue jeans, accentuating his toned arms and long legs. His eyes sparkle with mischief and from this distance you can make out his gorgeous dimples peaking through his trimmed beard. The other, stern but handsome, wears a plaited shirt and some dark trousers, broad shoulders making you bite your lip. He drinks you in with brown eyes, his slightly curly hair framing his face nicely, also sporting a trimmed beard and moustache. Gulping nervously, you take another sip from your drink for some extra courage.

"What's your name, sweetheart?" the one with the dimples asks, voice smooth and deep, making your knees go weak.

You tell them your name, asking for theirs in return.

"I'm Negan, this is Joel," Negan explains, head pointed towards his buddy with the plaited shirt. "Must say, you definitely have some lady-sized balls on you to make us follow you here."

"Maybe," you answer, lips curled into a smile, eyes drifting to Joel, then back to Negan. "Want to come feel for yourself?"

Negan lets out a deep laugh, shaking his head in disbelief. "That mouth on you."

He takes some calculated steps into your direction and you hold in your breath in anticipation.

Negan takes the drink from your hands, kneeling down to place it on the ground next to you. When he looks up at you, you bite your lower lip, pulse quickening with him being so close.

He grins up at you when is fingers carefully trace your naked calves, up, up, up until his hands disappear under the flowy material of your dress. He rises then, towering over you, hands still anchorend on your flesh, pulling your dress up on their way towards your ass.

"I fucking like what I feel so far," he teases. The heat radiating from him makes your head spin.

His lips ghost over your neck while his hands knead the flesh of your ass, one of them travelling to the front of your panties, gently cupping your clothed pussy.

You jump at his touch, heat rising up your body while arousel pools between your legs. Hands flying to his shoulders, you moan out loud when his fingers trace your lower lips through your panties, grinding your center into his hand while your eyes flutter shut.

"No balls, but a damn wet pussy, baby," Negan muses, rubbing over you with more pressure. "That all for us?"

Nodding, you moan again when Negan pulls your panties aside, his fingers gliding through your wet folds.

"Words, darlin'. Want to hear what you need." Your eyes fly open, meeting Joel's dark gaze over Negan's shoulder. He casually leans against the opposite wall, arms crossed in front of him.

"Need to come, please," you whimper.

"So polite, damn," Negan breaths against your ear. "Keep looking at him, eyes open."

Before you can answer, Negan sinks one thick finger into you just to withdraw it and circle your clit with the right amount of pressure to make your knees go weak. He finds a dizzying rhythm, coaxing little moans out of you.

All the while you try your best to keep your eyes open and locked with Joel's, being watched definitely makes your blood boil with pleasure. And not only that, it's the way he looks at you, those brown eyes and stoic face, as if he tries his best not to pounce at you and swallow you whole.

When Negan finally enters you with two of his digits and sets a faster pace, heel of his palm deliciously smacking up against your wet folds, you nearly scream.

"Shh, don't want anyone to see you like this, wouldn't you?" Negan whispers against your lips, kissing you passionately to shut you up.

When his lips leave yours, you look over his shoulder again, panting. "You just wanna watch, Joel?" you ask him while Negan fucks you with his fingers.

Joel doesn't answer right away. He pushes himself off the wall, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt while he closes the gap between you both and him.

"Sure don't", he says, voice rumbling in his chest.

Negan moves his body to make room for Joel without retreating his fingers or slowing his movements. It's as if they know this kind of depraved dance already. And hell, who are you to judge?

Your right hand leaves Negan's shoulder to find leverage on Joel, letting him comes face to face with you. His left hand tangles into your hair. The kiss that follows drives the air out of your lunges. His tongue coaxes your mouth open and while he moves his mouth against you, Negan whispers into your ear.

"Such a bad little girl, ain't you? So desperate to come that it doesn't matter who's giving it to you."

You gasp for air when Joel pulls away. Moan after moan spills from your lips, Negan's fingers fucking you so good you can't even form a coherent thought.

"I think you should shut her up, Negan", Joel says.

"Yeah, I definitely should." he grins down at you mischieviously. He retreats his fingers from your pussy, making you whimper in protest. You want to talk back, but Negan is faster.

"Open up", he adds and you obey. His fingers, coated in your juices, enter you mouth. The palm of his hand rests against your chin, taking full control of your mouth. You shouldn't like this, you really shouldn't but your pussy clenches around nothing, eyes rolling back.

"Fucking shit, will you look at that? She likes having her mouth stuffed," Negan comments lowly, moving his fingers experimentally.

Eyes travelling between Negan and Joel, you grind your hips forward, searching friction, anything really, to lessen the ache between your legs. You can feel your sticky wetness there, can smell yourself on Negan's fingers which are now fucking your mouth.

"Don't worry, darlin', I've got you", Joel mumbles. When his fingers, two at first, sink themselves into your waiting hole, you gasp and moan around Negan's fingers. They both fuck you mindless, wetness coating Joel's hand the harder he drives his digits into you. Adding a third finger, he curls them just right and you splutter around Negan's digits, the stretch nearly too much.

The club, the music from afar, other people who could potentially see you like this, it all doesn't matter, is nearly forgotten. Your legs begin to shake, the pleasure rising higher and higher, your fingers sinking into their arms, surely hard enough to bruise.

"Shit, you look so damn hot like this. Let it happen, sweet thing," Negan praises, shoving his fingers deeper into your mouth. You gag around them but are distracted by Joel who presses his thumb onto your clit, rubbing in tight motions. Your eyes find his and you begin to tremble, your orgasm rushing through your body, leaving you shaking and moaning around Negan's fingers. Joel fucks you through it, spreading your wetness all over your thighs and his hand.

"That's it, good girl", Joel says, slowing his fingers.

"Hot damn, messy little thing." Negan grins at you proudly while retreating his fingers from your mouth. Salvia drips down your chin and his fingers and without another word, he licks his fingers clean.

Transfixed with the view, you jump a little when Joel's fingers also leave you. You watch him inspect his glistening hand, also licking your juices off his fingers, savouring your taste.

"Thank you", you whisper blissfully, still glued to the spot. "You wanna take this somewhere more private so I can return the favor?"

[moonxnite]

y’all ever fantasize about a fictional character a little too hard to the point you’re convinced you should be admitted to a mental hospital?

[starsm00n]

Is he a scary man covered in blood? Or is he my baby girl? Spot the difference

[grugruel]

I need to grind on a hot older man so bad rn

[naughtyneganjdm]

Mine - Chapter 1

Story Summary: Joel Miller finds a woman in Jackson that is head over heels for him, but the trauma from his loss and past puts him in jeopardy of losing the one person he’s close to when he’s unable to show her the kind of love and affection she craves. Will he be able to change his ways or will he lose out to the charming newbie Negan in town? 

Characters: Joel Miller (The Last of Us), Negan (The Walking Dead), the reader (OC, third person), etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45115177/chapters/113491984

Warnings: Swearing, smut, angst, etc.

Notes: I decided to do another cross over story with The Last of Us and The Walking Dead. This is based off The Last of Us universe and I’m starting this story before we actually get to see Jackson, so some of this is going based off the game a bit as well. I know this is different for me, but for some reason my brain was eager to write it. Y/N means your name or whatever name you want to use. This first chapter heavily focuses on Joel and Y/N’s relationship. Gif Credits: @tomshiddles & @jdmorganz​

A cool gust of wind made Y/N pull her jacket in closer to her body while she sat on the steps of her porch in Jackson. There was a sense of nervousness and panic flooding her veins. She wondered if maybe she was too early for her planned date. She couldn’t believe she was actually worrying about a date. It had been so long since she had been on one. Who knew that living in a time like this would actually give time for people to have dates. That’s what was nice about Jackson. It brought back to life the way things used to be. At least somewhat.

When Y/N was brought to Jackson after her group was found, she didn’t believe it at first. A small little town that was closed off and protected that had electricity? It was an amazing thought. One that made her question if it was real to begin with. The only thing about Jackson was that to make everything work everyone had to work hard. It made you appreciate everything all the more.

It had been quite some time since she had arrived in Jackson and it had already been pretty eventful. She had come just before Tommy was reunited with his brother Joel who had become the talk of the town. When Joel had returned after leaving the first time, he became an important staple to the town. With his knowledge of construction along with his wits about the world in general, people often looked to him. Y/N was one of the fortunate people that got to work with him frequently. Well, to her she was lucky. Many people acknowledged that he was important to the community, but he could come off rather unfriendly and unwelcoming to others. He was working hard to break down that wall that he had obviously built up over the years, but it was taking a lot out of him. But Y/N saw beyond that tough exterior. He was a man with a good heart that was super charming when given the chance. All it took was Y/N getting to see him interact with Ellie for her to know how she felt about him.

A moment of bravery led to her asking Joel out on a date earlier today. At first when she asked him, it seemed like he didn’t know how to respond. It visibly caught him off guard and it almost immediately made her regret asking him because she assumed he didn’t feel the same way about her which led to her apologizing profusely. The long pause from Joel when she asked just made her assume that Joel didn’t feel the same way, but he did his best to get her to calm down and agreed to going out with her for a drink at the local bar they had in Jackson.

It had Y/N excited, probably too excited. She tried on multiple outfits before finally deciding on something to wear. It wasn’t like she had a wide array of clothing since it was the apocalypse after all and there was only so much she could choose from. It was a colder night for them in Jackson so she had to end up wearing a coat anyways.

With the sun going down, she wondered if Joel was going to show up at this point and it made her worry. Maybe he didn’t want to go on this date and he didn’t want to make her feel bad at work earlier. Right when she was about to give up, she heard footsteps approaching and lifted her head to see Joel standing before her. He seemed nervous when he swallowed down loudly and tossed his hands up in the air.

“Sorry, I was uh…getting a peptalk,” Joel explained with an uneven breath pointing back toward the house that he lived in. His graying hair seemed more properly groomed than it usually was and he sighed loudly. “Ellie told me I should shower and put on something nice.”

“I’ll have to thank her,” Y/N winked making a flush of color flood into Joel’s cheeks when she carefully stood from the steps that she was sitting on to move across the yard to him. “You look good.”

“Oh, thanks,” Joel quickly looked down at what he was wearing and cleared his throat uneasily. It took a minute before he gazed over her and nodded. “So do you.”

“We both look like we’re ready for the cold,” she teased him reaching out to playfully touch his shoulder seeing the way he shifted on his feet. It was a bit of an awkward moment, but she just pointed in the direction they were supposed to go. “You ready?”

“Sure,” Joel waited for her to go first and then he stepped in beside her to follow her toward town. There was a long silence between the two of them and he licked his lips in a nervous sweep. “I won’t lie to you Y/N, it’s been a very long time since I’ve been on a date of some kind. I’m not very good at this. I’m not very outgoing.”

“That’s okay,” she assured him with a shrug of her shoulders. “I know you’re a man of a few words, but I find the mystery about you all the more appealing. It makes me look forward to the future when I get to pull information out of you.”

The way his chocolate brown eyes gazed over at her made her smile because it seemed to interest him with what she said, “I know I’m probably a mess and I will say stupid things tonight so I immediately apologize ahead of time.”

“No, you’re good,” Joel shook his head and gave a small smirk. It wasn’t often that Joel smiled or even smirked so it made her heart flutter inside of her chest seeing it. Under the faint glowing lights of the town, Y/N couldn’t helped but be charmed with the fact that Joel appeared to try to groom his facial hair as well. The gray hair looked good with his tanned flesh and she knew that she was swooning too hard right now. She needed to dial it back a bit. When they got to the bar, Joel put on that southern gentleman charm and held the door open for her. “Ma’am.”

“Thank you,” she gave him a wink and headed inside feeling the warmth of the building surrounding them. It was loud and she noticed the way it made Joel uncomfortable. Noticing an empty table in the corner, Y/N motioned Joel to follow her and felt herself in awe with the way he helped her into her seat before going to his. Joel pulled off his jacket to reveal his plaid button-down shirt that he had chosen to wear.

“I didn’t realize it was so loud here,” Joel spoke louder than normal, leaning forward toward the table to get her attention. “Then again, I don’t really come here often. I like…sticking to myself.”

“Well I’m glad you decided to come here with me,” she extended her hand out across the table to place her hand in over his for a moment. Joel’s eyes shifted to look at the gesture and she unhurriedly pulled her hand away. She was way too eager to touch him and maybe it looked pathetic so early in the date. “Hopefully we can get to know one another more.”

“I think I know you pretty well,” Joel informed her, getting more comfortable in the seat before gazing around the busier bar that the people of Jackson had come to in order to relax after a long day of work.

“Oh yeah?” she found herself more so focused on Joel while he was taking in the area surrounding them. Joel was used to being on edge from the stories she heard from Tommy about his brother. So it made sense that he would be taking in everything all at once. “What do you know about me?”

“Well, I know you’re a good worker. Reliable. Trustworthy. Kind,” Joel listed off some things that made her smile when his brown eyes finally connected with hers. “You listen to folks. You’re easy to work with. You make working enjoyable.”

“I’m glad you think all of those things about me,” she admitted seeing him nod and she let out a long sigh. There was a boost of laughter that drew Joel’s attention away from her and she almost damned that they picked here for their ‘date’. Looking toward the corner where the pool tables were, she saw a group of people having fun together and Joel grunted. “What?”

“A lot of people in town seem to like that Negan guy,” Joel grumbled under his breath making her smirk when Joel shook his head and he seemed to roll his eyes.

“Not a fan, huh?” she teased him noticing the way that Joel seemed uncomfortable in the chair before her.

“He’s just…loud,” Joel explained stealing another look in the direction of everyone that was there. Negan’s eyes lifted from the pool table that he was at to see that both Y/N and Joel were staring out at him. A large smile pressed in over Negan’s chiseled features when he waved. It immediately made Joel freeze up because he didn’t know how to respond to it. It took him seeing Y/N wave back out of the corner of his eye to realize that it was Y/N Negan was waving to. “You two know one another?”

“Yeah, we work together a lot,” Y/N answered Joel about the newer member of Jackson. “He’s funny. Has the mouth of a sailor, but I like him. He makes work interesting most days when things get boring.”

“Oh,” Joel seemed tense after she admitted that she knew Negan. “So you’re like everyone else that is charmed by him, huh? You find him attractive?”

“Sure, he’s a good-looking guy,” she commented with a shake of her head noticing the way that Joel tensed up upon hearing her say that. Was it too soon for her to be excited at the idea that he might be jealous to hear that? Because it sure looked like he was jealous hearing that she thought Negan was a good-looking man. “Although, I think he’s already taken.”

“Is he?” Joel suddenly seemed interested further in Negan and it made her smile. That was something she would have never pinned Joel for. Being a gossip. But she found it cute. “With who?”

“I don’t know, he talks about a girl named Morgan all the time,” she thought back on previous conversations watching Joel’s face scrunch up like he was thinking about who she was talking about.

“I don’t know any girls named Morgan here,” Joel confessed, gazing over at Negan again wondering if it was one of the woman by the pool table. Each person that was there, Joel knew their names so he was rather flustered.

“Oh, so you know all the women in Jackson?” she replied in a teasing tone making Joel turn his head back toward her in a moment of surprise. “Should I be jealous?”

“I just make it my job to know the people I’m surrounded by,” Joel admitted with a simple shake of his head. “Being here I’ve yet to meet a Morgan so I’m just curious.”

“So I don’t have anything to be jealous about?” she pushed further making Joel’s face scrunch up in amusement before shaking his head. “Joel Miller doesn’t take out all the girls on dates then?”

“Come on,” Joel snorted with a roll of his eyes. “Should I be worried about Negan? You’re telling me that if he wasn’t taken, you would be here with him right now, aren’t you?”

“Did I say that? I think I said he was an attractive man that was taken,” she pointed out with a wink making Joel tip his head to the side while he eyed her over. “He’s not really the guy I’ve had my eye on for a while. There is someone else I’m very interested in.”

With the way his eyebrow arched, it showed that Joel was interested, but he had still been so focused on the rest of the group that when Negan started to head in over toward them, it made him groan out in frustration.

“Oh shit, now that he’s spotted you…he’s comin’ over,” Joel tried to hide his face to a degree and it amused Y/N to see that Joel was so antisocial in that moment.

Letting out a rumble of annoyance, Joel shifted again and sat forward in his seat when Negan headed over toward the table looking down at the two of them, “Hey you two! You care to join us for a game? Everyone’s surprised to see you here big guy.”

“Didn’t realize I made such an impact,” Joel scoffed making both Negan and Y/N glance at him since Joel often drew the most attention of anyone in Jackson with the way people looked to him with his past along with his knowledge of everything. “I’m not all that interested.”

“Fair enough,” Negan chuckled looking down to Y/N with a big smile. “You finally got that date, huh?”

“Excuse me?” Joel’s southern drawl made Negan’s eyebrow arch up in amusement.

“I may have talked to Negan about…things,” she felt her cheeks flush over making a snort fall from Negan before it turned into an amused rumble of laughter. It made Joel want to ask questions, but she was clearly embarrassed. What kinds of things did she talk about Negan with when it came to Joel? “A lot.”

“This one doesn’t hide shit from you, I fucking promise you that,” Negan reached out to place his hand in over Y/N’s shoulder to give it a firm squeeze. “I hope the two of you enjoy your night. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

There was an uncomfortable laugh that escaped Joel’s lips and he brushed his fingers through his hair when Negan backstepped away from the table, “Hey Negan. Where’s Morgan?”

“Fuck, you know about Morgan? You really do know everything, don’t you?” Negan seemed amazed that Joel seemed to know about the woman that Y/N had mentioned. “Wow…she’s with her friend’s family right now.”

“You didn’t want to bring her here?” Joel threw his hand about making Negan’s nose wrinkle and his thick eyebrows furrowed. “I just thought you would want to bring your girl with you on a night like this.”

“Do you bring Ellie to a place like this?” Negan stammered, his head bobbing about in almost a dramatic manner making a breath catch in Joel’s throat. What the hell kind of a question was that?

“Of course not,” Joel immediately shook his head making Negan’s dimples enhance as if he was entertained with what Joel was saying to him. “Ellie doesn’t belong in a place like this and she’s not…just no.”

“Then I think you would understand why I’m not bringing Morgan to a place like this,” Negan reasoned with Joel, shrugging his shoulders drastically before pointing back toward the pool table that was behind him. “But if you ever want man, you’re welcome to come over and meet Morgan. She’d probably be thrilled since there are so many fucking stories about you. You’re like a real-life comic book character to her.”

“What?” Joel seemed lost and they both went silent. There was awkward tension between all three of them before Joel cleared his throat. “No, yeah. I would like that. I’ll have to meet her at some point.”

“Well this isn’t fucking weird or anything, I’ll just…talk to you later Y/N,” Negan gave her a wink and headed back toward the pool table to the group that was waiting for him. Y/N seemed amused with the interaction, but it really just left Joel flustered.

“What were we talking about before he came over here?” Joel pulled himself from his thoughts finding Y/N’s eyes hooked on him and it made him let out a nervous laugh. “What?”

“I was telling you that I had my eye on someone else,” she recalled making Joel tap his hands against the table giving her a small nod.

“Oh yeah? Who?” Joel blurt out making her chuckle when she stared out across the table at him. Giving him a nod, Joel let out an embarrassed breath when he dropped his head down and grumbled something underneath his breath. “That was stupid.”

“I mean, I think it’s obvious who I like considering I asked you here tonight,” she reasoned with Joel seeing the embarrassed expression over his features when he slowly lowered his head to look up at her. “I did ask you out on this date.”

“I didn’t know if it was a date or just…a hang out thing with two friends,” Joel spoke up being honest with her about things. “Ellie insisted it was a date, but I didn’t want to assume things and make this whole thing uncomfortable.”

“Well then I will just put it all out on the table and make it known…” she began leaning across the table and he did the same so that he could hear her when she spoke up in a whisper. “I am extremely attracted to you Joel. I have been since the moment that you showed up in this town. I think you’re gorgeous. I like you very much, but most of all I love the way you interact with Ellie and take care of her. I feel like there is a lot to you that people don’t see and I want to get to know that man better. The one you hide from everyone.”

Joel was quiet, his dark eyes locked on hers with his eyebrows furrowed as she spoke, “Does that scare you away from the situation? Because if you aren’t interested, I’d really rather you tell me right now so I don’t get my hopes up.”

“No,” Joel shook his head, his lips parting while he tried to gather himself. “What I mean is, I find you very beautiful. I like you.”

“I like you too,” she felt her heart flutter hearing Joel call her beautiful. It made her happy to know that her feelings weren’t exactly one sided. Joel was quiet and unsure of himself, but it made him all the more appealing to her. “I tell you what? How about we get out of here and just take a walk. So the two of us could actually talk and get to know one another better.”

“Sure,” Joel stood up from the table without question and reached for his jacket. They were barely in that bar long enough to matter really. But when they were out Joel seemed relieved.

“So you’re not a fan of groups of people?” she confirmed with Joel who groaned out at the idea of it.

“I just have been kind of a loner most of my life. I’m not used to people putting their guards down so easily. After the things I’ve seen over the last twenty years of my life, I have to be on guard. It’s just hard not to be,” Joel confessed with a shrug of his shoulders. “It’s hard for me to pretend that life is normal here. Like there isn’t a shitload of awful people out there or infected. So yeah, I’m not big on groups and being…loud.”

“Understandably so,” she muttered just enjoying that they were standing closer to one another with her shoulder rubbing up against his. “Ellie is a bit…loud.”

“She’s the exception,” Joel snorted with a shake of his head. “But she also took a while for me to get used to as well.”

“What happened there?” she whispered seeing Joel think about it for a minute before he bit down on his bottom lip. “Too much?”

“She just means a lot to me. We took a journey together and…I just want to keep her safe,” Joel admitted to her knowing that he wanted to leave out certain details considering how special Ellie actually was to him. “I would just do anything to keep her safe.”

“I love that,” she explained with a smirk knowing that it surprised Joel. “Seeing a good father, or father figure in this case is just incredibly sexy to me.”

“Ah, so you have daddy issues,” Joel was so blunt, but a smirk tugged at his features showing that it was his attempt at joking with her and giving her a hard time. “I just, you have to have realized there is obviously an age gap between us.”

“I’m not that young,” she replied back in a rebuttal and it made Joel snort.

“And you’re not that old either. Once you get to my age and everything aches, you’ll understand what I’m saying,” Joel teased her with a shake of his head and a long sigh. “Your body is still fresh.”

“Oh?” her eyebrows bounced up and she saw the color flood into his cheeks again.

“You know what I mean,” Joel grumbled making her laugh. It entertained her that she could get Joel to blush. She wondered how many people had been able to do that lately.

“I’m sure your body is still fresh too,” she bit down on her bottom lip knowing that it was her attempt at flirting with him. “From what I can tell at least. You’re strong. It’s very appealing. I’d love to get to know your body more.”

“Wow, you’re…forward,” Joel coughed making her roll her eyes before shrugging her shoulders. “It’s not a bad thing. Just wow.”

“Dial it back, I got it,” she frowned making Joel scoff before shaking his head. “I just find you very attractive and I think you need to know that.”

“Okay then,” Joel responded with a nod, his eyes narrowing out at her when he pushed his hands into his pockets. “So you are more so looking for a booty call with an older man that is strong because that is your type.”

“You’re my type,” she corrected him making Joel laugh for the first time tonight.

“You avoided the booty call part,” Joel pointed out making her heart skip a beat and she didn’t answer him. “So you just want to get laid?”

“You’re the one talking about getting laid,” she responded feigning a sense of innocence to her. “I just really like you Joel and while I’m not turned off by the idea of sleeping with you, I don’t really want it to be a one-time thing. I like you.”

“Why?” Joel stammered and it made her laugh. “Seriously. There is nothing about me that I could see being appealing to people.”

“Are you ignoring everything I’ve already said to you tonight?” she huffed, turning to Joel and she stopped walking. Joel did the same and turned to face her. “I really like you, Joel. If you like me too, I’d love to see this be something more than just a booty call.”

“I’m not very good with relationships,” Joel confessed to her with an exaggerated sigh. “I have a hard time expressing my feelings because of…things.”

“Okay?” her eyebrow arched while he bobbed his head from side to side trying to think of what to say.

“I’ve only been in two really big relationships in my life. One was my wife that I got divorced from before this whole world went to shit. The other…” Joel thought back on Tess and he felt his chest ache. Life never really gave him the time to mourn the person he had been with over sixteen years. And even when he was with Tess, he never was very capable of being affectionate and intimate with her. “Let’s just say things didn’t end well. I’m not the most affectionate person in the world. Because of the loss and the things I’ve been through in my life, it makes it hard for me to get close to people. I put up these barriers and they are hard to take down darlin’.”

“I feel like if you had the right person in your life, you could break down those walls a little bit and you wouldn’t have to be so guarded,” she suggested and it made Joel tense up. There was a hopefulness in her expression that showed she desperately wanted to be that person. He didn’t know exactly how to tell her that the last person he had been with was a woman he cared greatly for over sixteen years. A woman who died believing that Joel never truly loved her. “We all have sad stories to go with our pasts Joel and I’m willing to work through things with you if we get to that point.”

“The thing is Y/N, I’m hard…” Joel was trying to think of a way to explain himself that wouldn’t let her down too hard and he saw her face scrunch up. Her eyes lowered and he let out a frustrated sound seeing that she was fucking with him again in the way that she took what he said. “Get your mind out of the gutter.”

“I’m sorry, it was the way you said it,” she giggled reaching out to poke at the center of his chest making Joel step back. “I get your warnings and I hear you, but I would still like to try to get to know you better and see where things go if you give me a chance.”

“Well at least you’re persistent,” Joel commented making her snicker before nodding. This was the first interest she had in someone in a very long time. Of course she wasn’t going to give up hope on this one. “I give you that.”

“Thank you,” she bit at her bottom lip and took in a long shallow breath. “I’m sure within time I could make you love me. I’m a very lovable person.”

“Uh…” Joel swallowed down the lump that was in his throat hearing that word. It was a word he had never even used during his time with Tess, but he wasn’t certain that he wanted to tell Y/N that. This was the first woman that had showed an interest in a long time toward him and he didn’t want to scare her off. “I don’t doubt that.”

Clearing his throat, he noticed that it was getting cold and it was pretty dark out, “While I enjoy walking, how about the two of us go back to my place for some coffee or something?”

“Coffee?” she repeated what he offered. “At night? You looking to stay up all night?”

“Well I don’t sleep much to begin with,” Joel informed her with a simple shrug of his shoulders. “Tea? A beer? I don’t care. Something.”

“Yeah, that sounds nice,” she agreed to head back over to his house with him finding herself excited at the idea of getting to be at his house with him. While they headed back toward his place, she found herself wondering something in that moment. “What about Ellie?”

“What about Ellie?” Joel repeated her words and shrugged. “Ellie has her own place in the garage in my backyard. I set up something nice for her there so she feels like she has her own space. Her own independence, but I still get to watch her.”

“Oh yeah?” Y/N noticed that the lights were on outside in the garage area as they passed down the street when she got a glimpse of his backyard. They walked up the steps to his home and up the stone walkway. “Do many people get to be in Joel Miller’s home?”

“Ellie, Tommy and Maria pretty much,” Joel answered her when he got the door open, holding his hand up for her to enter. “Now you.”

Entering his home, she took a look around as he closed up the door behind her after following her in. It smelled like him. And if you knew what Joel smelled like it was often a woody scent likely from all the woodwork that he did even in his spare time. People knew that he liked to carve things and also made guitars. Joel was starting to open up to people and was even trying to give people guitar lessons, but it was pretty rare. It was more so for the kids in the town.

His home was pretty bare, but she knew that Joel was a simple man. Joel took his jacket off and put it on the coat hanger before reaching for her coat to help her take it off. It still charmed her that he had that southern chivalry and kept it alive this long into the future. Many people lost that a long time ago and she found it charming.

“I’m going to make myself some coffee,” Joel announced nodding toward the kitchen area of his home. “You’re welcome to join me or I could make you some tea.”

“I can drink coffee,” she smirked following him over toward the kitchen noticing the way that he limped as he made his way to that part of his house. “I like your place, Joel.”

“You’ve barely seen it,” Joel muttered making her chuckle. “But thank you.”

Heading toward the corner of the kitchen where the cabinets met, she leaned back and braced herself while she watched Joel gather what he needed to make his coffee, “So since I was honest about my relationships, what about you?”

“You can ask me anything Joel and I’ll be completely honest with you. There isn’t much to say in terms of important relationships in my life. Nothing too serious,” Y/N answered Joel after he asked her about her personal life. “Like you pointed out, I was a bit younger than you when this world fell to shit so it didn’t leave a whole lot of time for relationships and getting close to someone. Being here in Jackson is the first time I’ve had any kind of sturdy moment in my life.”

“Touché,” Joel grumbled under his breath, turning to face her and he rest his back up against the island in the middle of his kitchen. There was a silence while he gazed over the lengths of her body. Everything she had said to him tonight replayed in his mind and he was trying to think of what he wanted to say to her. “So you want to date me?”

“Do you want to date me?” she tipped her head to the side watching Joel’s eyebrows tense and his jaw flexed while he looked her over. Having him ask her that was almost cruel. He knew how she felt about him. She made it very clear throughout their time together. So she wasn’t going to answer that until he gave her an answer himself.

“I’m still thinking about it,” he slurred making her eyes get big and she nodded. “What would make me want to date you?”

“Other than the glowing recommendation you gave me earlier?” she replied with a bit of an offended tone. “What’s not to like?”

“You’re arrogant,” Joel seemed to be finding fun in making her tense. “I don’t even know if you’re a good kisser at this point. How can I date someone if I don’t even know what they kiss like?”

“You’re questioning if I’m a good kisser or not?” she placed her hand over the center of her chest watching Joel shrug and seem so nonchalant about things. “What if you’re not a good kisser?”

“Oh, I’m a good kisser,” Joel responded with a grumble, curling his fingers around the edge of the countertop. “So if there is a problem with us kissing, I know it has to be you because I can kiss.”

“Now who is the arrogant one?” she stammered, boldly stepping forward making Joel’s dark eyes follow her movements. Stepping before Joel, she reached up to curl her fingers around the side of his neck to bring him down. Tipping up on her toes just enough, she pulled him forward to bring their lips together. With a hum, Joel kissed her back making it vibrate against her lips. The kiss lingered before she pulled back with a shuddering breath. The warmth of his breath over hers was drawing chills down her spine and Joel tipped his head back slightly. “Was that a bad kiss?”

“Too short to tell,” he growled, palming in over the side of her face with his thumb stroking over her cheekbone. Lowering in again, he watched her eyes flutter to a close before he captured her lips in another kiss. This one was stronger, the warmth of Joel’s lips caressing hers into a desperate surrender. When he pulled away, he sucked faintly at her bottom lip and hissed. “Well, we know that you like my kissing. I told you.”

With her lips glistening from the kiss, Joel found himself in awe with the way that Y/N was looking at him. He wasn’t sure if anyone ever looked at him like that. Not even Tess saw him in the way that Y/N did right now and he knew that. He wasn’t used to so much longing and hopefulness from someone. Especially when it came to him. It had been so long since he had felt the warmth of another person pressed against him. Being able to kiss someone again awoke something inside of him and he liked it, “but you don’t kiss too bad yourself. I’ll take it into consideration when thinking about whether or not I may want to date you.”

“You’re a cruel man, aren’t you Joel Miller?” she licked her lips making his face scrunch up while her hands settled in over the center of his chest. It kept her braced against him while it felt like the world was spinning around her.

“Very, haven’t you heard from the people in town?” Joel whispered against her lips, pressing faint kisses over her bottom lip. At this point there was no doubt in his mind that he had her eating out of the palm of his hand. Just the small amount of attention that he had given her had her breathing unevenly. Her pupils were dilated with lust and want for him. “I’m very harsh and hard to please.”

“I guess I will just have to work harder,” she bit at her bottom lip, her hands dragging down over the planes of his abdomen. When her fingers got to the button in his jeans, she plucked it open making Joel swallow down loudly. “As I aim to please.”

“Y/N,” Joel grumbled when she managed to get the zipper down in his jeans. Maybe this is where he should have stopped her. This was someone who really liked him. Yeah, he was hoping it would lead to something like this. It had been so long since he got to fool around with someone, so he kept his mouth shut when she looked to him with such desire.

Biting down onto his bottom lip, he closed his eyes when he felt her hand dipping beneath the material swiftly to palm in over his body. It made his eyelids get heavy and he tipped his head back to stare out at her while she caressed over him through the material of his boxers. With an arch of his eyebrow he watched her lower down to her knees before him. All it took was a tug to get his jeans to his ankles before she reached for the waistband of his boxers and took no time in getting those down his body as well. Looking up at Joel, she kept her eyes hooked on his when her fingers curled around his hardening cock. Soft strokes of her fingers over his body made him grasp tightly to the edge of the counter. When he was solid in her grasp, she straightened up on her knees before him and dragged her tongue out over the tip of his manhood making his knees buckle somewhat until he managed to gather himself. His eyes rolled back to a close when her lips surrounded his girth sucking faintly at his sensitive flesh. With her tongue lapping at his skin, Joel knew that it had been so long since someone actually took their time to pleasure him. It wasn’t something that he knew he needed, but now that he was actually having it, he knew that it had been too long.

With his eyes closed, everything felt so much more enhanced when Y/N took him further into the warmth of her mouth. Arching his hips forward, Joel growled and lowered his left hand to sink his fingers into her hair. Fluttering his eyes to an open, he watched her while she took her time to bob her head over the length of his erection and it made his heart hammer inside of his chest. Each pull back of her head had her tongue dragging along the underside of his shaft making his whole-body tense up. Curling his fingers tighter into her hair, Joel urged her further down his length making her eyes come to a tight close.

Thrusting his hips forward made a wet noise fall from her throat before he started to pull his hips backward before thrusting forward. They were uneven thrusts, but it felt so good having the warmth of her mouth surrounding him. Licking his lips, he found himself completely charmed with the way she was attempting to give him what he wanted. Tugging back on her hair, he heard the wet sound that filled the air when her lips pulled from his solid length and he used his other hand to drag his thumb out over her bottom lip. A muted groan fell from his throat with her kissing at the pad of his thumb.

“Get up,” Joel demanded of her, reaching out to pull her up toward him and it made her fall in against his chest. Reaching out to unplug the coffee machine, Joel could feel Y/N’s lips at the side of his neck while she worked open the buttons of his plaid shirt. Fumbling through his motions, Joel did his best to work her pants down her body hearing her whimpering against his kisses.

As soon as they managed to get the material from one of her legs, he was quick to curl his arms around her thighs to pick her up and press her back against the counter. Bracing her, Joel used his strength to keep her up when he reached between them to push her panties aside. Grabbing a hold of his straining cock, he teased the swollen tip through her sensitive folds before lining his body up with her entrance. With a roll of his hips, he heard her crying out and sinking her fingers into his thick, gray hair. Joel buried his nose against the side of her neck cherishing the warmth of her body enveloping his. Sinking further into her, Joel heard her purr out and he did his best to steady himself. The sensation of her surrounding him was something he didn’t know that he needed, but it was an addictive feeling and he wanted more of it.

When he felt like she was prepared enough, he started to buck his hips up toward her again and again. With him filling her, she was crying out and it fueled him to know that she appeared to like what they were doing. Doing his best to keep a hold of her, Joel took his time leaving kisses over her jawline and neck knowing that she was a shuddering mess before him.  

“Joel,” she cried out his name and it made Joel’s eyes close tightly, his lips parting with their uneven movements together. His hips smacked up against hers while he thrust into her time and time again. Her fingers tugged at his graying hair while her other hand clawed at his shoulder making Joel hiss out against her lips. “Please…”

Joel wasn’t exactly the most verbal lover, but the occasional moan that he released drew chills up and down her spine. This wasn’t exactly where she thought their first date would go, but she wasn’t complaining. In fact, this was the ultimate dream come true for her. The strength of Joel’s thrusts led her to cling to him tightly and a few of the items on top of his counter fell over making Joel huff. Lowering her down, Joel felt her fingers pushing up underneath the material of his unbuttoned shirt to let it drop down his arms while she caressed over the strength of his bicep. Joel’s lips hovered over hers. Their breath was warm against each other’s and he could feel her hips still rocking toward him wanting that friction that he had put a halt too.

Dropping the material of his shirt on the ground, Joel wasn’t gentle or slow about the way he got the rest of her clothes off before forcing her to face the island. With a gasp, her hands grasped the edges of the counter while she tried to steady herself with Joel moving her where he needed her. His right hand urged her hips where he needed them while his left curled around her body to palm up the lengths of her abdomen before squeezing at her full breast.

Wrapping his fingers around his throbbing length, he led the tip to her ready entrance and pushed forward sinking into her almost completely before pulling out. It made her whine before he repeated the motion several times. Having her shaking before him while laid out across the counter made him chuckle.

“You’d never make it out there with how loud you are,” Joel informed her, lowering down enough to place a wet kiss between her shoulder blades. Following the movement of her spine, he kissed down her back before snapping his hips forward once more to bring them together again allowing all of him to sink into her. “We’d be dead with the way you’re reacting.”

“We’re not out there, we’re here,” she licked her lips, cooing out with the feeling of him inside of her. “You feel so big inside of me. Why don’t you lighten up and use that cock of yours to make me cry. I bet your proud of the sounds you’re making come out of me.”

“I’d almost be offended if you weren’t making them,” Joel quipped nipping at her shoulder. Squeezing his arm around her waist had his bicep flexing while he brought her back against him with every thrust forward he made inside of her.

With her warmth surrounding him and contracting around his thick length, he found himself getting lost in the moment. Each movement was fueled on what felt good in that moment and he was craving every second of it. His breathing got louder, but he wasn’t exactly giving in to being verbal with her. With a firm smack forward of his hips, he had her crawling forward, but his hips followed her movements. Hooking his fingers into her hair, he kept her where she was and gazed down at him inside of her. Her arousal was coating his body and it made him lick his lips. The fact he had held off this long on getting intimate with someone even surprised him. Another whine fell from her lips with him leaving himself stagnant inside of her.

Pressing his chest up against her back, he reached to hook his fingers with hers. Squeezing them firmly, he took his time rolling his hips behind her. With each soft smack of his skin against hers, his thrusts became somewhat quicker and just a bit harder. In no time, he had her crying out his name with her fingers hooking tighter to his while he pounded into her from behind. It was obvious that Joel was a very physical person. The way he had sex showed that.

“Almost there,” he coached her with his teeth nibbling at her earlobe with him making sure to be closer to her. The wet smacking sounds filled the kitchen and he hoped that he wasn’t being so loud with Y/N that it would draw Ellie’s attention from his backyard.

“Joel,” she whimpered, her eyes slamming shut when she pushed up on her toes but he didn’t allow her to pull away from him when she orgasmed. Joel longed to feel that sweet, intoxicating sensation of her body contracting around his while she shook. The noises she made had him smiling, but there was still that longing he had to come. It had been so long since he had a release and now that he was on the edge of building himself up to it, he was desperate to get it. “Please…please let me see you.”

“Uh…” Joel lifted his head to look around the kitchen before finally pulling back and away. When his solid length pulled from her warmth, he watched her shudder while taking a minute laid out across the counter to try to calm her breathing. Grabbing a chair, Joel pulled it out from the table and lowered down onto it. Stretching out his legs, he tapped his thigh and motioned her to come to him. “I’m all ready for you.”

Pushing herself up onto her feet, it felt like her legs were Jell-O with the high that Joel had given her body by absolutely having his way with her. Taking a moment to stare out at his body while he was stretched out in the wooden chair, she couldn’t help but have her throat go dry looking at him, “This is the moment where I wish I was an artist of some kind. You are perfection.”

“Stop,” Joel snorted, looking down at his body. The prominent thing that stood out to him was the scar that was left from his injury over his lower abdomen. Letting out a shuddering breath, Joel felt Y/N bracing herself over him while her hands grabbed at the back of the chair. Biting into his bottom lip, Joel tipped his head to the side and cleared his throat. “You’re the beautiful one.”

“I think everything about you is amazing,” she took her time, resting her weight against Joel’s thighs while she got comfortable over him and just started caressing over his body. It made a lump develop in his throat at how delicate she was and how attentive she was to every part of him. Sliding her hands down over his broad shoulders, she took her time to appreciate the flesh before palming down over his chest and toward his lower abdomen. When her fingertips touched at the puckered healing flesh over his body, it made him uncomfortable and she could see that he was uneasy about it. “It shows how strong you are. Don’t be ashamed of your scars. It shows the world how hard you fought to stay here. You’re the strongest man I know Joel.”

“Yeah?” Joel felt vulnerable in that moment. His Adam’s apple bounced in his throat and his chocolate brown eyes were hooked on hers. With a nod, she pressed in to hover her lips over his making Joel lick his lips. There was a want to be kissed. This whole time he had been arrogant. Wanting a certain thing from her and that was pleasure. Something he had been lacking for so very long, but with her touching him and saying the things that she was he found himself in awe of the woman over him. “I’m deeply flawed Y/N.”

“I can help fix you,” she hushed him, leaning forward to meet his lips in a longing kiss that took her breath away. For so long she had been swooning over Joel and the fact she was sharing such an intimate moment with him made her feel special.

“There is no fixing me, I was broken a very long time ago,” he grunted against her lips when he felt her reaching between them. Taking her time, she lowered and led him back toward her entrance and allowed herself to get used to him inside of her again with that beautiful stretching feeling. Wincing, Joel tipped his head back, his hands caressing all over her body. With a cry, she bit down at her bottom lip and tipped her head back. Her fingers braced over his abdomen while she was meticulous in the way she bounced her hips over his. Having her like this made things more intimate. It brought them closer together and maybe when he brought her back here, he did think that it would just be a booty call but having her in this way made his view change of her. It was clear she had a way bigger crush on him than he did her, but he had always found her beautiful. There was just that whole problem of getting intimate with others. After everything that he lost, Joel never wanted to get close to people and it took a lot. Even his relationship with Ellie was hard, but he was doing the best he could to open himself up. With a grunt, his fingers squeezed at her hip and he was sure it would have likely left a mark. “I am what I am.”

“You have to be willing to let others in,” she reached for Joel’s hands, lifting them up to press them back against the top of the chair. Tipping forward, her lips hovered over his and Joel’s chocolate-colored eyes were focused on hers. Her movements had become steady. When she found something that Joel visibly liked she kept at it. So desperately she wanted him to break down the walls that he was holding to enjoy himself, but he stayed quiet. An occasional faint moan fell from his lips which she considered a small victory for herself. What really was her reward in all of this was the way his eyes stayed locked with hers with the muscle in his jaw flexing. It was the most connected she had been with him all night. With a faint rumble, Joel’s eyes rolled back to a close with his head resting back against the chair. The way she was riding him was obviously something he was enjoying and she brought their lips together. “Let go Joel…”

A shuddering exhale escaped his lips, his brow line creasing when she felt him throbbing inside of her. His hips bucked up toward her to chase that release and she mewled out into his mouth feeling the warmth of his release inside of her. Their fingers were hooked together when she lowered them back down. Joel’s eyes lazily opened and he started kissing down over her jawline and toward her neck.

“Was that okay for you?” she searched for any kind of praise from Joel, wincing when he nipped at her flesh. It was almost like he was marking her as his own and she liked it. Joel’s rough palms were caressing up and over her back toward her shoulders and back down again where Joel grasped her ass firmly.

“More than,” Joel answered her, enjoying the way that she touched him and caressed over his scalp. “Thank you, I needed that. Very much.”

That night she didn’t leave his home. They spent the rest of it together just drinking coffee and talking. By morning when she had to go to work, she didn’t want to leave him. Joel wasn’t someone who talked much exactly and it took a lot to get it out of him, but she did her best. Thing was, she wanted to be with him all the time when they were free. And he didn’t exactly turn her down.

Not long after their first night together Joel realized that they were spending a lot of their free time together so he asked her to move in with him. It made more sense being together than having her house just sitting there. It freed it up for another family in the future to take and it was nice to have someone else to share his home with. Things weren’t as quiet anymore and that was a good thing. It was everything she could have wanted in getting closer to Joel.

A year had passed with them living together and while Y/N was happy, Joel had been very upfront and honest with her from the start. Since that day they got together, he never called her his girlfriend. He never told her that he loved her. There was a severe lack of affection, one that she thought she could fix, but she wasn’t sure that Joel was capable. After a year of trying she realized that it was likely never going to come.  

They shared a house together and bed, but even now as they were lying in bed together Joel was at the opposite end of the bed turned in the direction away from her. Gazing back over her shoulder, Y/N longed to have Joel hold her. There was a desperation to be cuddled. Joel’s arms and chest were so nice, but he was so cold to anything like that. So many times she had told him she loved him, but he would often blow it off with a grunt. He hated using those words and often told her that it was rushing things. At the beginning of this relationship, she was hopeful. It had been a year, why would she be rushing things with love? They were living together. They shared their life together. It felt real to her.  

At this point, it just felt like they were roommates. Two people that were together so they weren’t alone. They would just go about their day, come home and maybe talk about it before going to bed again. They were two people that occasionally had sex that honestly lacked intimacy in so many ways. Regardless of how many times Joel turned her down with affection, it didn’t stop her from trying. She was determined that one day she would be able to get Joel to change for her. She wanted to believe that. She had to believe that.

Looking over her shoulder again, she could see that Joel was shaking in his sleep. He was having a nightmare and she let out a long sigh. Turning over, she scoot toward his side of the bed and wrapped her arms around him. It calmed his body having her comfort him like that. Nuzzling her nose at the bottom of his neck, she felt him opening up to the idea of her holding onto him. Hooking her fingers with his, she stroked her thumb over the back of his hand feeling Joel squeezing her hand in his.

Joel’s breathing changed showing that he had waken up and she pressed a loving kiss against his cheek, “I love you, so much.”

Joel said nothing, just scoot back in closer to her to have her hold him tighter in her grasps. She assumed that he was trying to pretend that he was still sleeping, but she knew his breathing. After a year you got to learn the person you shared a home and a bed with. There was a longing in her heart that hurt. In her eyes, Joel was perfect. He was everything to her, but she wished that some nights he would do this with her. Hold her in his arms and whisper sweet nothings to her.

All of Jackson knew that they were living together. It wasn’t like there was a person that didn’t know they were with one another. But Joel still had a whole lot of issues showing that intimacy. Hand holding in public wasn’t for him. Kissing seemed to embarrass him around others. So everything was behind closed doors. Y/N was in love, Joel was comfortable. There was a huge difference in the way they acted toward one another. She thought they were in a relationship, but by the way Joel acted she wondered if he just thought they were really close friends with benefits.  

In time, Joel’s breathing went back to what it was when he was asleep and she felt her throat tightening. Just once she wanted to hear him say that he loved her. That he cared about her. That life wouldn’t be the same without her. Yet, she got none of those things. He told her that he liked her. That he enjoyed her company. That life was no longer boring or lonely because of her, but honestly? She was extremely lonely and it was the worst feeling in the world. To love someone so much and feel like they didn’t feel the same was soul crushing. But she forced her emotions down. She loved Joel so much that she couldn’t picture not having him in her life.  

She lived for moments like these. At least Joel let her comfort and console him. Getting to touch him was the greatest gift that she could have, but she didn’t know what to do anymore to try to get Joel to be affectionate with her. She was becoming touch starved. She wanted that emotional connection with Joel, but he wasn’t giving in. She was surprised that he okayed her moving in with him in the first place because he really liked having his own space. Sometimes she thought he did it just to appease her. To give her something since she so desperately wanted to feel anything more from him.

Joel had opened up to her about Sarah and vaguely talked about Tess. It was Tommy that had really kept her in the loop with things. And it was because of Tommy that she never gave up on Joel. Tommy promised her time and time again that Joel cared for her. That it would just take time. That Joel needed someone not to give up on him and damnit, she was trying. Harder than she had ever tried before in any relationship.

The best moments they shared together were those that were spent with Ellie. Ellie got Joel to relax, to the best of his ability really. It was amazing what that kid could do to change Joel around. When they were all together, it was the only time they really felt like a family. There were hopes that if Ellie found a way to love Y/N that Joel would soon too. It was just taking longer than expected. Y/N never wasted a minute with Joel in letting him know how she felt about him. And she hoped that in time, he would learn to feel the same way about her as she did him.

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[hannahkay-411]

Having to move on with my day as if I didn’t read the most soul crushing, gut wrenching, heart breaking piece of literature ever (it was a fanfic)

[4ever-feral]

Moodboard Masterlist

✮Requests are OPEN! Send me a person or character with a vibe and/or a prompt✮

♡Pedro Pascal characters♡

Javi Gutierrez

Joel Miller

♡Andrew Lincoln characters♡

Rick Grimes

♡Norman Reedus characters♡

Daryl Dixon

♡Misha Collins characters♡

Castiel

♡Jeffery Dean Morgan characters♡

Jeffery Dean Morgan himself , #2

♡Jared Padalecki characters♡

Sam Winchester

♡Thomas Gibson characters♡

Aaron Hotchner

♡Jensen Ackles characters♡

Dean Winchester

♡Matthew Gray Gubler characters♡

Spencer Reid

♡Hugh Jackman characters♡

Wolverine/Logan

♡Jon Bernthal characters♡

Jon Bernthal himself

[mrsnegan]

Good Girl (Negan x Reader x Joel)

Note: Just a little drabble for you with my main men. I'm thirsty. 😅🤤

Warnings: no plot, just smut, threesome, overstimulation, p in v, unprotected, praise kink, squirting, cum play

"I know you've got another one for us, don't you? Be a good girl," Negan teases while driving himself over and over again into you. Your muscles are sore from clinging to their bodies, your head swims with pleasure, almost unbearable but oh so delicious. You wouldn't want it any other way.

Joel's fingers lightly graze your swollen clit and you flinch, a shaky moan leaving your lips.

"We've got you, darling. Just one more," he whispers, eyes dark with lust. He adds more pressure and you try to get away from the onslaught of pleasure, but you are anchored on Negan's cock, his grip bruising your hips.

"You can take it, I know you can. You're so good for us, such a pretty little thing." Negan's voice is deep, his gaze fixed on where you are joined and where Joel's skilled fingers rub you in tight circles.

It keeps building rather rapidly inside of you, yet another orgasm they are gifting you, hopefully the last for the evening because your body can't possibly take any more.

"Gonna...gonna cum," you breath, your hands trying to find something to hold on to, one landing on Joel's arm, the other twisting into the sheets.

"Good girl, give it to us." Joel's fingers speed up, rubbing your clit just right while Negan pushes into you without mercy.

The blinding pleasure finally peaks, white hot euphoria takes over your body. You can't contain the scream leaving you, can't contain the liquid squirting out of you, pushing Negan out and staining him and the sheets.

"Fucking hell," Negan curses, pushing himself back in while Joel, eyes half-lidded, keeps rubbing you through your blinding high.

Just as you think you're finally spent, milked from all you could give them, it's building again.

"Fuuuck", you wail, another orgasm rushing through your body, leaving you shaking and utterly helpless. Your nails dig into Joel's arm who uses his lips to kiss the sweaty skin on your neck, humming and hissing alike.

Negan pulls out of you under a litany of curses, painting your pussy and Joel's fingers with his seed before he collapses beside you on the bed.

"So fuckin' good, darling, so precious," Joel compliments, his fingers dancing through your sodden folds, sending aftershocks through your overstimmulated system.

You finally let go of his arm, tiny half moons adorning his skin where your nails dug in.

While Negan is still catching his breath, his own fingers soothingly caressing your upper arm, sinister smirk in place, Joel carefully wedges himself between your legs, kissing your lips tenderly. His coated hand disappears between your bodies, pumping his rock-hard length with quick strokes. He has been on the edge for quite some time but instead of sinking himself into you and violating your limits, Joel strokes himself faster and faster, approaching his own orgasm, knowing very well there will be a continuation some time later.

You watch him with hooded eyes, watch him let go, furrowing his brows, mouth agape, also shooting his load onto your pussy.

"Damn, that's hot," you hear Negan shamelessly admit, his fingers tracing a path across your skin towards your center, collecting your mixed releases and bringing them to your mouth.

Willingly and with a soft moan, you lick his fingers clean, never leaving Joel's gaze who, panting himself, takes your hand into his cum-stained one and places featherlight kisses into your palm.

---

Taglist: @murphslass @negans-attagirl @you-a-southpaw-doll

[fanfictilltheend]

hi does anyone want to be friends??? i've been on tumblr for years but still don't know how to make them on here. i just have a lot of thoughts/thots and i wanna talk about them with people so lmk haha sorry this is so random lol

[thewritersaddictions]

Christmas Stories 2024 Master List

Welcome to the Christmas Stories 2024 Master List

A/n- There will be some fluff for and during the Christmas time. This is 24 days of fluff, dedicated to the cold holiday time.

Word Count-

Series Master List

Day 1- Joel Miller + Fake Dating

Day 2- Jim Hopper + Kissing under the mistletoe

Day 3- Alcina Dimitrescu + Looking at Christmas Lights

Day 4- Negan Smith + Catching snowflakes

Day 5- Steve Rogers + Sick s/o

Day 6- Eddie Munson + Building Gingerbread houses

Day 7- Koing + Cuddling Together

Day 8- Elijah Mikealson + Drinking hot cocoa by the fireplace

Day 9- Spencer Reid + Celebrating new years together

Day 10- Rick Grimes + Roasting marshmallows

Day 11- Leon S. Kennedy + Opening Christmas Gifts

Day 12- Daryl Dixon + Building Snowmen

Day 13- Steve Harrington + Christmas Shopping

Day 14- Jensen Ackles + Watching Holiday Movies

Day 15- Soldier Boy + Watching Snow Fall

Day 16- Joyce Byers + Baking Cookies

Day 17- Loki + Chirstmas Cruise

Day 18- Michonne + Snow Angels

Day 19- Billy Hargrove + Sleding

Day 20- Ellie Williams + Snowball Fight

Day 21- Bucky Barnes + Slipping on ice

Day 22- Stefan Salvatore + Ice Skating

Day 23- John Price + Decorating Christmas Tree

Day 24- Karl Heisenberg + Babys First Chirstmas

Completed On: (12/24/24)

Posted On: (03/28/24) - (12/01/24)

CS24 Tags-

[little-diable]

Reunion – dbf!Negan / Joel Miller series (Part 1/?)

Y'all voted for this series, so here we go. I promise there will be lots of smut, but please show some love to this chapter which has almost no smut in it just yet. Please like and reblog if you enjoyed reading this, your comments keep us writers motivated. Enjoy my loves. xxx

Summary: The reader is Joel's older daughter, she got separated from her family the first night of the outbreak. Joel's best friend, Negan, had always been close with (y/n), but what happens when she meets Negan again after all these years? Will the crush she had on him as a teenager manage to push her closer to him? Will she cross paths with her dad again, even though he had left her behind?

Warnings: 18+, smut, masturbation (f), eventual TWD violence, heavy age gap, reader is legal ofc, dbf x fem!reader

Pairing: Negan x fem!reader (2.8k words)

this amazing header is by @deathofpeaceofmind

Run Little Dove Masterlist

“Well, would you look at that. You alright there, sweetheart?” Her eyes fluttered open slowly, blinking a few times to adjust to the brightness before her eyes found Negan's pupils. A soft chuckle left the young woman as she sat up, knees pressed to her chest, lips pulled into a smile. 

“Where’s dad?” Negan’s gaze momentarily left (y/n)’s features, his lower lip pulled between his teeth as he looked back towards the house. (Y/n) gave herself a few seconds to study her dad’s best friend, the man whom she and Sarah have known from both their first days on this very earth, the one who had joined their every vacation, the one who slept on their sofa whenever his wife forced him out of his home, the one who’d always look after them should their dad be busy. The one (y/n) had been crushing on since she had been sixteen – perhaps even a bit younger.

“He should be out in a few. I think he took another call.” With a sigh leaving (y/n), she plopped back down on the sunbed, stretching out her limbs. “Why don’t you join me? Knowing my dad, it’ll take quite a while till he finishes the call, and Sarah’s not back yet.” 

A hum rumbled through Negan, tugging his shirt over his head to sit down next to (y/n) on the empty sunbed. It took all her strength not to look at him, teeth buried in her lip to try and stop her eyes from wandering. No words were spoken between the two, enjoying the heat of the warm August sun, listening to the playlist her dad had put on. Even though she’d never admit it out loud with Negan around, not wanting to feed his big ego, (y/n) enjoyed these calm moments with him, allowing herself to relax without any worries clouding her mind.

“I saw that you’ll join my gym class this year.” Her eyes found Negan’s, slowly nodding her head as her brain began to focus on his words. Even though she had known that she’d eventually have to join his class, she had tried to avoid it for as long as possible, knowing that she’d struggle to concentrate with him around. “I won’t give you any special treatment, even though its your last year, I hope you know that, sweetheart.”

“You say that now, but we both know you have a sweet spot for me, old man.” 

……

She was running, feet carrying her through the forest as she kept on looking back. The sound of the roaring trucks echoed through the air, ringing in her ears as she tried to up her speed. Her heart was pounding, not used to running this fast for longer than a few seconds, palms and forehead sweaty. Heavy breaths spluttered from her lips, begging for a miracle, anything that would help her make it out of the forest before those who were chasing her could get their hands on her.

Panic flushed through her veins, guiding (y/n) as she tried to not stumble over her feet, over the branches littering the forest ground. Her glassy eyes were focused ahead, tears running down her cheeks as she spotted a clearing, hopeful about stumbling upon a field or a high meadow she could hide in. But before (y/n) could move any closer she was cut off by two trucks coming at her from both sides, forcing her to an abrupt halt.

She tumbled to the ground, her body collapsing with her hands stretched out to catch herself. Fear filled her system, forcing some more tears to well up in her eyes as a man with a moustache stepped out of one of the trucks, smirking at her. The man moved closer, forcing (y/n) to stay on the cold ground as the other men directed their guns at her.  

“Aw, why all that running, little dove?” He grasped her arm, forcing (y/n) to her feet, not paying her protests any mind. She stomped her feet onto the ground, trying to stop the man from pulling her towards the truck, but all he did was tighten his grip on her, breath clashing against her ear, “You shouldn’t have stolen from us, maybe then I would have let you go.”

Her body was tossed into one of the trucks, head colliding with the metal flooring, forcing another gasp to leave her. (Y/n)‘s tears kept dripping, rolling down her cheeks like a river cascading along rocks, forcing its trail to stick to her skin. She tried to listen to the sounds echoing through the air, hoping to find anything she could use to figure out where they were taking her, but she couldn’t pick up on anything, too tired to stop herself from giving into the darkness coming upon her.

……

“Good morning, birthday girl. Sweet twenty-one.” Negan’s raspy voice shook through her, making her jump. With her hand pressed to her heart, (y/n) turned towards Negan, watching the smirk widen on his lips. “What? Aren’t you happy to see me?”

“Of course I am!” She walked closer, almost throwing herself into his open arms. Just the scent of his cologne left her knees trembling, forcing her teeth into her lower lip before a sinful sound could flush through her. “Just didn’t know that you were already around.” 

“Your dad called last night, he and Tommy worked longer than expected, so he asked me to stay over.” A hum left (y/n), slowly letting go of Negan with a smile glued to her lips. She felt his eyes on her frame, watching her prepare them some coffee, eyes drawn back to him as she heard him moving closer.

Negan leaned against the kitchen cabinet, arms crossed in front of his chest, stretching the fabric of his black shirt over his biceps.  (Y/n) had to force her eyes off his frame, not daring to give into the longings she felt. And yet she couldn’t help but wonder if he’d push her away should she try to touch him, now that she was finally twenty-one. 

“Morning, happy birthday, (y/n)!” Sarah’s voice ripped (y/n) out of her thoughts, slowly shaking her head before her sister wrapped her arms around her waist, cuddling herself closer to (y/n)'s frame. “Is dad already awake?”

“He isn’t, but how about we two make some breakfast, while (y/n) gets ready and then you can wake the old man?” Negan’s piercing eyes met (y/n)’s, shooting her a quick smile before he helped Sarah reach for the package mix, turning from the birthday girl who disappeared back towards her room, needy for a shower that could wash away her sinful longings. 

Within minutes she found herself in the shower, silently groaning at the feeling of the warm water cascading down her back. With her eyes fluttering close she imagined Negan pressed against her body, strong arms wrapped around her waist to keep her close, fingers finding their way to her pulsing bundle. 

“Fuck.” The curse rolled off her tongue as she let her fingers wander, circling her clit with quick movements, needy for her relief. Her body was burning, set ablaze by the thought of Negan touching her where she needed him the most. Fuck, he’d surely know how to touch her, would soothe the ache deep inside her. 

Her teeth left marks on her lower lips, fingers adding more speed to their movements. She’d cum way too soon, riled up by Negan’s presence, hoping that she’d be able to keep her distance for the next hours, not wanting her dad to pick up on the glances she was throwing his best friend’s way. 

Soft moans left (y/n), legs trembling as the intense sensation crawled closer, eyes squeezed shut to imagine the way Negan would take care of her. She could almost hear the soft words he’d speak, how he’d praise her, how he’d worship her body just the way she needed him to. 

And with one last curse leaving her, (y/n) came to the thought of her dad’s best friend. 

……

“And we’ve got another present for you, boss.” She woke with a gasp, eyes shooting open, taking in her surroundings. It took (y/n) a moment to realise that she was still in the back of the truck, forcing a groan out of her as her body focused on the pain she was plagued by. Slowly she tried to sit up, struggling to do so as she watched a shadow approach. 

“Good morning, sweetheart.” The man with the moustache spoke to her as he opened the door, hand grasping her arm once again to pull her out of the truck. Her body clashed to the ground, groaning once again. She kept her eyes closed, not willing to take in her new surroundings just yet, clinging to the darkness that offered a false sense of safety.

“Who is that?” A gruff voice broke the silence, a voice that left her heart skipping a few beats. It couldn’t be - no, it couldn’t be. And yet the voice sounded too familiar, making her body relax before her mind could catch up with it.

“She stole from us on our run, took us a while to catch up with her, she’s a feisty one.” Laughter echoed through the air, but all (y/n) could focus on were her racing thoughts, trying to pierce the pieces together. Slowly she rose her head, eyes focusing on the pair of boots that moved closer. Slowly she shifted her weight, cowering in front of the person that was now towering over her. (Y/n) didn’t want to look up, eyes squeezed shut, scared to cling onto the small thread of hope that would be snapped once she met a pair of unfamiliar eyes instead of his.

“Don’t be scared, doll. Look at me.” She felt something being pushed against her chin, tilting her face up. Her eyes shot open, focusing on the all-too-familiar face. A sob clawed through her, body trembling as she watched him crouch down, wide eyes wandering over her face.

Even though (y/n) was sure that he had recognised her, Negan didn’t give in, staring at her for a few more seconds before he rose back to his feet. With his eyes flickering back to Simon he cleared his throat, lips pulled into a smirk they seemed to buy, though (y/n) could tell that it was a fake smirk, not the one she had fallen in love with as a teenager. 

“Lock her up till I decide what we will do with her. She’s off limits, we can’t trust her so I better not catch any of you fuckers touching her.” Another sob clawed through (y/n), hands trying to reach for Negan, wondering why he was acting like this. The man staring down at her had nothing on the man she had once known, and yet something about him hadn’t changed at all. 

She felt two hands grasping her from behind, forcing her to her feet with an angry huff leaving the man. No further word was spoken as (y/n) was dragged away, unable to wipe off the tears that kept on falling. Her eyes didn’t stray from his, staring at the man whose expression was cold, unrecognisable even. 

“It’s a shame we can’t have you, little dove, but don’t worry, eventually he’ll give you to us, but not before he got his own taste.” 

……

“Get in the truck! Right now!” (Y/n) watched her dad scream the words, panicked eyes set on Sarah’s frame. A scream echoed through the evening as she watched their elderly neighbour slowly rise from the ground, racing towards her dad, Tommy, and Sarah. Only seconds later did (y/n) realise that she had been the one who had screamed. She couldn’t keep on watching, had to turn her head – a mistake she’d come to regret minutes later. 

Before she could even begin to understand what her body was doing, (y/n) ripped the car door open, feet carrying her across the street towards Rosie’s house. The young woman was trying to climb out of her window, begging for help as she got stuck halfway, a moment of distraction that seemed to pull (y/n)’s mind away from her family. Only as the sound of a car swiftly driving off began to echo through the darkness did she dare to snap her head back towards the street. 

She stood frozen, hands pressed to her side as she watched the truck drive off. Had they not noticed her sudden disappearance? Had they not noticed the way she had taken off to save another friend of theirs? 

“(Y/n)!” Rosie’s call ripped her out of her trance, teary eyes snapping towards the woman who still seemed to struggle. Without giving it another thought, she raced up towards Rosie, helping her down onto the ground. Even though she could tell that the woman was speaking to her, she couldn’t concentrate on the words, still shaken up by what had just happened.

It wouldn’t take them long before they’d notice her disappearance, a minute, or two maybe? They’d turn back around for her. They’d turn back around for her. They’d turn back around for her. 

Hopefully. 

……

The sound of steps echoing through the hallway forced her tired eyes open, her body growing tense as (y/n) watched a shadow approach. Her eyes met his, instantly drawn to the man she had once clung to, the man who had once protected her with all his might, the man she had once sworn to trust. 

For a few seconds, they were engulfed by a thick silence, eyes not daring to break contact as Negan stepped into her cell, crouching down in front of her. Slowly he reached his gloved hand out, cupping (y/n)’s cheek before she could move away. Her sob clawed through her all too violently, a sound that forced a frown to tug on Negan’s features, pulling her into his chest. 

“Did they hurt you? Any wounds I need to look at?” No words managed to leave (y/n), caught in her throat by the strength her sobs had on her vocal cords. Negan kept holding onto her, allowing his still somewhat familiar scent to clash against her. 

“Atta girl, deep breaths.” His voice wrapped itself around her, keeping her close like a blanket tossed over her shoulders, protecting her from the cold nibbling on her fingers. Negan kept cupping her cheek, thumb wiping away the tears that kept on falling, hating to see her like this, hurt, confused, and exhausted. “I didn’t think I’d ever get to see you again, doll. Where’s your dad, where’s Sarah?”

(Y/n) could only shake her head, choking on another sob as she thought back to the night her family had left her behind. She had tried to take shelter, not daring to wander off in hopes that her dad would come back to pick her up. But as the minutes had turned into hours, the young woman had slowly but surely been forced to realise that she was on her own. 

“I’m sorry, baby. Fuck, I’m so sorry..” Negan sat down next to her, once again pulling her back into his chest. Their moments together felt like a déjà-vu, so familiar, and yet so different to all these years ago. “What happened? Why are you without them?”

“We,” she inhaled a shaky breath, not daring to speak of the day that haunted her whenever she closed her eyes. Her voice was raspy, ringing in Negan’s ears like a song he hadn’t heard in years. “We got separated right in the beginning. Why didn’t you say something earlier?”

“I didn’t want to risk anything, once enough people know that we have some history together, you become an easy target. I can’t risk losing you a second time.” A hum left (y/n), she was too tired, too confused to argue, only hoping that she’d somehow make it out of this mess. 

“Lucille? Is she here?” It was just a whisper, a whisper breaking Negan out of his racing thoughts. Now it was his turn to shake his head, tightening his grip on her body, trying to pull her even closer as if he was scared that he was stuck in a nightmare as if he was scared that she’d be ripped from his grasp any moment now. 

“It’s just the two of us now, doll. But you’re safe here, I promise.” 

[girlbloggersfolly]

MASTERLIST

-ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛-

hiiiii, welcome to the blog. I honestly don't really have a fandom or anything, just writing about whichever dilf/tv show/movie im hyperfixating on this week. good luck out here <3

Joel Miller:

DELTA DAWN (1979 summer camp AU):

Pairing: camp counselour!joel miller x camp lifeguard!afab!reader

PART 1

PART 2

PART 3.... coming soon i hope

[godsandmonsters505]

MASTERLIST

All fics are written with fem!reader. I don't use Y/N (though there may be very minimal use in some of my older fics).

Fics marked * contain smut and are only suitable for 18+ readers.

Fandoms:

The Walking Dead

Narcos

Arctic Monkeys

The Last Of Us (coming soon!)

Click here to see who I take requests for!

The Walking Dead

Negan Smith

Beg Me * - you pay Negan a visit in his cell.

Sweet Taste For Men Who Are Older * - Negan clocks onto the fact that you have a 'thing' for older men.

Roll Like Thunder* - dad's best friend (AU)

Rick Grimes

The Other Woman * - You console Rick as his marriage falls apart.

Narcos

Javier Peña

The Blackest Day * - goodbye sex with Javi (angst!!!)

Arctic Monkeys

(no longer writing for)

Alex Turner

Baby I'm Yours * - fluffy morning sex.

Does This Feeling Flow Both Ways? * - friends to lovers type vibe.

No 1 Party Anthem * - Alex has sex with a stripper!Reader.

[shy-taylorsversion]

hey y’all!! request are open!! i’ll write them as i get them/when i can. if i’m a little slow, i apologize. i’m a student and now work so forgive me.

who i write for and what i write below the cut…

who i write for -

supernatural

dean winchester

the vampire diaries universe

damon salvatore

buffy the vampire slayer

spike

bridgerton

anthony bridgerton

benedict bridgerton

colin bridgerton

stranger things

steve harrington

eddie munson

billy hargrove

tlou

joel miller

the walking dead

rick grimes

daryl dixon

negan smith

~~~~~

content wise i will not write

no incest, rape/non-con etc

most fics will be female readers unless stated other wise. i’ll gladly do gender neutral just ask!!

nothing disrespectful to other races, religions, communities or cultures.

most things to do with pregnancy, it’s just not

my thing

other than that, everything else is fair game.

if there’s anything i missed and you have a request, just ask!

[naughtyneganjdm]

On the Run - Chapter 1

Story Summary: Being the daughter of wealthy socialite Philip Blake, the man running for governor, has its advantages but when someone tries killing Y/N in order to get to her father, Y/N finds herself on the run and entangled in a web of mystery and romance with her professor Joel Miller and her bodyguard Negan Smith.

Characters: Joel Miller (The Last of Us), Negan (The Walking Dead), the reader (OC, third person), etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47007172/chapters/118420453

Warnings: Swearing, angst, smut, abuse of power between a professor and a student, etc. 

Notes: I'm doing another crossover with Joel Miller and Negan Smith. This is very alternate universe and will feature characters from both The Last of Us and The Walking Dead. I already have a lot of the story written so I will try to update it as frequently as possible.

As always Y/N ='s your name or whatever name you want to use for this story. Thanks for checking it out.

Silence. It was something that so many people longed for and enjoyed, but for Y/N it was miserable. Sitting alone in the large dining room waiting for her father to make his presence was something she did frequently. And every time she did, she never felt more alone in her whole life. It was so quiet that the ticking sounds from the grandfather clock in the other room was heard and it was driving her crazy. This was how it always was. So many of her friends told her that she was lucky to have a rich father. A father who gave her access to whatever money she wanted and allowed her to do anything she pleased. While it sounded nice on the outside it was actually a very lonely life.

When Y/N was a child, her mother had abandoned her and her father. At the time Y/N didn’t understand it but as she grew older, she didn’t blame her. She just wished sometimes that her mother would have taken her along. Y/N’s father was Philp Blake. A powerful man with a whole lot of money to control whatever the hell he wanted, but it was clear most of her life that being a father was never something he wanted. The lack of presence from her father was always very evident in her life. He was always busy at work or away on trips leaving her alone with a lot of the workers that he hired to watch over her. If anything she was more of an annoyance to her father. A thorn in his side. For a while he wanted her to follow in his footsteps and take over the family business, but her interest was in other things. It was her final year in college and her father made it exceedingly clear that he hated the direction her life was going in. Threatened her that once she was done with school if she didn’t do what he wanted with the family business he would cut her off completely, but truthfully? She didn’t give a shit. So because of that, she was living it up now while she could. She had complete access to his money and could do anything she wanted so she was. Her father was too busy with running for the position of governor in the state that they were living in to even notice anyways. It was almost a fuck you to him.

Shifting in her seat, she reached for her phone to pull it out and look at it. If her father was going to take any longer, she would have to be rushing to class and she hated that. She liked getting to everything early, but her father was the type to make others wait for everything. What was worse about today was that it was her birthday and she knew that he wouldn’t be doing anything special for it. In fact, that’s probably why he was making her wait longer than normal.

When the sound of footsteps finally started to fill the air, she set her phone down on the table and lifted her eyes to see her father entering the room with an arrogant smug over his features. He definitely knew it was her birthday and that’s why he made her wait.

“Y/N,” her father sat, his eyes gazing out at her when he got comfortable in the seat across from her at the large dining room table. “I’ve had them start breakfast for us.”

“I’m not going to be able to have it. I have classes to get to,” she informed him with a smirk, looking to her phone to see that she didn’t have much time left until she had to leave. “So what’s the plan for tonight?”

“I have a fundraiser tonight,” he remarked with a huff, his eyes surveying her over closely. “You can be late to your classes. I should be having breakfast with my daughter on her birthday.”

“Oh, so you do remember my birthday?” she feigned being shocked placing her hand over the center of her chest. Of course he would want her late for her classes because he hated what she was doing to begin with. “Here I was thinking you forgot.”

“Would you ever let me forget?” his southern drawl rumbled making her roll her eyes and shake her head. “I heard you had a party planned for tonight.”

“Oh yeah. Huge one. Everyone is coming here and we are going to celebrate out back. Lots of people, lots of noise and lots of alcohol,” she emphasized her words, her eyes narrowing out at her father when he let out an amused breath. “So you don’t have to worry about me embarrassing you at that fundraiser. I’ll be home embarrassing you in other ways.”

“I don’t care what you do as long as you stay out of the media. Enjoy it now while you can because this is your last year to do so before I cut you off. You’re twenty-three now. I think it’s about time you started taking care of yourself, don’t you? Since you’re so hell bent on not being part of the family business,” he almost mocked her seeing the way that she shook her head with his response. “Architecture? I can’t believe my own daughter is that boring.”

“Sorry to let you down pops,” she threw her hands up in the air and shrugged her shoulders. “I’m very much aware that I’ve been a constant embarrassment to you since I was born. We all know you wanted a boy.”

“I did,” he agreed with her nodding his head slowly. “Yet here you are. I’m sure if I had a son, he wouldn’t be turning his back on me going into something as useless as architecture. What a waste of a life and job.”

“Well I do like to waste time, just like I did this morning here waiting for you,” she gave him back the attitude making him let out a muted laugh that made her throat tense. “I’m glad I got to share my morning with you for my birthday. It was actually surprising to see you on this birthday compared to the last…how many birthdays have you missed again?”

“Always with the attitude,” he shook his head and sighed loudly, reaching out to place his hand over the center of the table. “When was the last time your mother contacted you again for your birthday? In fact when was the last time your mother contacted you at all?”

His arrogant, smug smirk made her curl her fist up and she could feel her heart hammering in her chest, “Your silence tells me everything. I imagine you at least bought yourself a fine gift for your birthday with the money I freely let you use.”

“Absolutely,” she snorted hating that his comment about her mother was able to actually upset her as much as it did. He wasn’t wrong. Her mother wanted nothing to do with her father and that’s why she ran off. But in running off, she wrote off Y/N too and that left Y/N parentless in a fashion. “You still keeping an eye on mom?”

“Are you asking me if I know where your mother is?” he questioned watching her nod and he threw his hands up in the air. It pissed her off that her father constantly threw it in her face that he knew where her mother was, but he’d never let her know. It had been so long since she had seen her mother that she felt like seeing her mother again would do nothing for her. At this point she was angry with her mother for leaving her all alone with her father. “I do.”

“And you won’t tell me, right?” she confirmed with her father hearing him chuckle under his breath and slide in closer to the table when one of the workers he had hired to work around the house came in with a tray of food for him.

“Why would I do that?” he blurt out with a tip of his head. “Your mother wants nothing to do with you. Why would you even be interested in finding out where she is? It’s not like she’s going to accept you back with open arms. You’re as good as dead when it comes to your mother.”

“Right,” she stood up from the table and stopped before leaving standing in the doorway. “Since I’m as old as I am and you’re ready to write me off completely as soon as I’m out of college, can I finally be allowed to leave without having your men tailing me?”

“Come on,” her father scoffed grabbing a berry from his plate and taking a big bite of it. “You know why I have you followed.”

“So I don’t embarrass you?” she saw her father’s head of security walking into the dining room with them, pulling up a seat beside her father at the table. “Good morning, Simon. I’m sure I’ll be seeing plenty of you and your men tonight, huh?”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way,” Simon winked, stroking his fingers over his graying mustache that looked like that of a villain in a cartoon.

“I’m going,” she announced pointing toward the door and Simon dramatically waved at her making her feel furious when she turned on her heel to leave. It was a useless meeting with her father and she didn’t understand why she waited for him anyways.

Instead of focusing on it though, she went to her classes and concentrated solely on those. None of her friends were in the same program as her so it made it easy to focus on what needed to be done with her schooling during the day. She knew that some of her friends would make a big deal about it being her birthday so avoiding them until later was a good idea.

The day went by quickly and by the time she got to her last class, she had her phone sitting on top of the desk before her. It was buzzing relentlessly and she knew that it was people getting excited about the big party for tonight. Instead of giving it attention, she just let it go until the professor standing at the front of the room turned to face her.

“Could you silence that damn thing?” he requested, his chocolate brown eyes locking with hers when she looked to her phone that was on top of her desk. With a smirk, she nodded and reached to turn her phone on silent when he shook his head. “You know in most cases I would have no problem throwing someone out of my class for interrupting it.”

“It won’t happen again Mr. Miller. It was an accident,” she assured him with a wicked smirk seeing the way that his eyebrows furrowed while he stared out at her and tugged at his plaid, button down shirt he was wearing in a nervous motion. “You know how much I love this class. You have my full attention. It was an accident.”

“I’ll let you off this time, but the next time I’m throwing you out,” he threatened, stroking his hand down over the facial hair that was over his jawline. With a shake of his head, he went back to teaching leaving her somewhat amused over their interaction. By the end of class her professor was seated at the edge of his desk with his arms folded out in front of his chest. “Ms. Y/N, please come to my office after class. We need to discuss something about your last project.”

“What about it?” she reached for her bag and threw it over her shoulder seeing him tip his head to the side. “Was it bad?”

“We need to discuss some things about your work,” he reiterated and moved out of the class leaving her standing at her desk with a smirk. Heading out of the lecture hall, she let out a gasp when she saw her best friend standing and waiting outside of the room for her.

“Poppy. What are you doing here?” Y/N clung tightly to her bag watching her best friend grip to her books and bounce in the position that she was in. Poppy’s blonde hair that was tied up wiggled with the movements and her green eyes glistened with excitement. “I have to go talk to my professor about something.”

“Oh! Come on! It’s your birthday and we have a party to plan!” Poppy’s squeaky voice boasted making Y/N smile.

“It is my birthday, but the party is already planned all out. All you have to do is meet me there tonight,” she reminded her friend making a frown expand over her features. “I have to deal with classes first. I will call you when I’m out of the meeting.”

“You should just ditch your professor Y/N, he works you too hard,” Poppy declared with a shrug of her shoulders. “I’ll be waiting for you babe.”

“Looking forward to it,” Y/N winked heading through the hallways to the office where she knew she would find Professor Miller. Standing in the doorway, she knocked on it when she saw that he was sitting at his desk looking at something with his laptop. When he heard her knock, she watched his brown eyes lift to stare out at her and she smiled. “You wanted to see me?”

“Close the door,” he instructed waving her into the office when he pushed his seat back and away from the desk. Listening to his order, she did what he asked and pulled her bag in closer to her body. “You left your phone out on your desk to annoy me today and I know you did.”

“Why would I ever do something like that Joel?” she placed her hand in over the center of her chest and feigned being innocent in the moment. “I’m your best student. Why would I purposely go out of my way to upset you? I don’t want you to punish me and give me a bad grade…”

With a rumble, Joel stood up from his seat and started to make his way around the table and she dropped her bag at her side, “Well, I may want you to punish me. I just don’t want you to give me that bad grade.”

“You’re a bad girl,” he rumbled reaching out to hook his arm around her waist to pull her in flush against him making her smile when she braced her hand in over the center of his chest. “You’re lucky it’s your birthday because I would spank you if it wasn’t.”

“Please do Professor Miller,” she purred biting at her bottom lip in a seductive manner seeing his eyelids heavy with want and lust while she stroked her fingers up and over the side of his neck. “It is my birthday after all.”

“You are going to be the death of me,” Joel slurred lowering down to claim her lips with his in a forceful sweep that left her melting in against his chest with his strong arms wrapped around her. With a growl, he bit at her bottom lip giving it a small tug before staring down at her. “You’re lucky I like you so much because I could have thrown you out of class today and avoided your birthday completely. I can’t play favorites you know.”

“Oh, I’m your favorite?” she teased him, pulling him down by the collar of his shirt to get him to kiss her again. Her lips parted allowing the warmth of his tongue to brush out against hers making her purr when they separated.

“You know you are,” Joel whispered, his thumb dragging out over her bottom lip and the warmth of his breath over her skin drew chills down her spine. “You are so beautiful. You know that?”

“Aw, Joel. Winning me over with your words. Just like you always do,” she muttered sliding her hand up to pluck open the top button of his plaid button down. “I do kind of want you to punish me for my birthday though. Remind me not to be a bad girl.”

“Well, if you insist,” Joel smirked grabbing a firm hold of her and leading her over toward his desk. Forcing her down over the top of it, he placed his hand firmly over the back of her neck and squeezed at it before dragging it down between her shoulder blades and over her spine. It made her let out a shuddering breath and he smiled. “You need to be more careful in my classes. Obviously, I’m going to like you because you’re my best student, but you make things too obvious and that is risky.”

“No one is going to know that we are fucking,” she looked back over her shoulder at him, wincing when he used his other hand to force her to put her head back down over his desk. “I wouldn’t want anyone to know about our relationship because I don’t want to ruin your job for you. You know I like our relationship. I don’t want to lose it.”

“Then you need to be a good girl and do as I say,” he responded sliding his palm in over her full bottom, squeezing it firmly before giving her bottom a firm smack. Arching forward, she purred out only to feel him reaching for the back of her pants. Pulling them down, Joel took her panties with the movement getting the material to her thighs. “You want to be a bad girl for your birthday?”

“I want to be your bad girl,” she slurred feeling the warmth of his palm caressing over her flesh making her bite down on her bottom lip. Purposely she added emphasis to the word your, knowing that she just wanted to be this way for him. After his soothing caress she felt him smack down over her ass making her whimper out. “Harder.”

“Harder?” Joel repeated her request, his southern drawl getting her hotter with the way he continued to caress over her tender flesh. Arching her back, she felt a stronger smack over her bottom making her cry out with the burning sensation it left over her flesh. Another firm spank followed and then another making her coo out and she felt a damp heat at her core. Joel’s hand caressed over the fleshy part of her ass before sliding between her thighs to trace his rough fingertips over the length of her sex. Teasing her with the idea of his fingers, he traced them over her sensitive lips before circling his index finger over her entrance. It made her hips arch up and a tsking sound fell deep from within his throat. “Sit still.”

“Joel,” she mewled out his name when he sank his fingers inside of her taking his time to thrust his finger in gradual strokes having the movements slowly grow stronger in strength. It made her close her eyes tightly, her head tipping back when he growled in response.

“You are so fucking wet. The spanks really did you in, didn’t they?” Joel teased her, inserting another one of his thick fingers into her warmth making her shudder beneath him. The plunges of his fingers inside of her made her heart hammer inside of her chest and she felt her pulse jumping in her throat. Before she could begin to enjoy the pleasure he was drawing out inside of her, he was pulling his fingers from her body and she whined. Looking over her shoulder she watched Joel bringing his fingers to his mouth to take them between his lips. Sucking at the taste of her over his flesh, Joel smirked when he saw the lust in her eyes while she stared out at him. “Head down.”

“Joel,” she pouted seeing him snap his fingers and she did as he ordered of her. Lowering her head, she stretched her hands out and curled her fingers around the edge of the desk. Joel stepped in behind her and she felt the denim of his pants rubbing up against her making her hum out with the friction it caused. Beneath his jeans she could feel him hard while he rubbed himself against her bottom. “Was your cock hard in class?”

“With you sitting in front row, my cock is always so hard,” Joel responded, biting down on his bottom lip while he rubbed himself up against her bottom. “Moving you to the back so I don’t have to sit down all the time would probably be a good idea. Don’t you think?”

“But I want to be able to look at you. We don’t have much time left with me in your class,” she whined when he pulled his hips and moved away. Going to lift up, she felt him pressing into the center of her back to keep her in place.

“Remember, you do as I say,” Joel demanded stepping in front of her at the other side of the desk. Joel started to pull open the belt in his jeans making her lift her head up to look up at him with big eyes. Licking her lips, she saw his dark eyes locked on her. Getting his jeans open, he pushed the material to the side and reached to pull down the front of his boxers making his cock spring out before her. Her throat went dry from the position she was in watching Joel’s thick fingers curl around his cock to stroke it firmly in his grasp. It drew attention to the swollen tip making her wet her lips. Stepping as close as he could to the edge of the desk, Joel hooked his fingers into her hair to get her to lift her head a bit further while his other hand led his cock toward her mouth. Teasing the tip of it across her bottom lip made Joel smirk when she whined knowing that he wasn’t allowing her to take him into her mouth yet. “You would do just about anything for me, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes,” she slurred against his flesh, parting her lips just enough for her to kiss at the tip making Joel’s jaw flex in response. “Anything you want…it’s yours.”

“Good girl,” Joel pressed his hips forward watching her kiss further at the tip before dragging her tongue out across the top collecting the taste of him at the slit. “Go ahead…”

Taking his cock into the warmth of her mouth made Joel tip his head back and moan, his fingers hooking tighter into her hair while she lapped at the head of his cock with her tongue before lowering her head over his length. It made Joel bite into his bottom lip and he dropped his head to make sure to watch her while she gave him a blowjob. Her eyes were closed for a short amount of time, so entirely focused on giving him what he wanted.

“Open your eyes,” Joel ordered with a scoff watching her do what he asked of her, fluttering her eyelashes when she looked up at him. Starting to thrust his hips, Joel sank his length further down her throat time and time again. The wet slurping sounds filled the office surrounding them while he had his way with her. Doing her best to relax her throat, she was allowing him to use her in any way he wanted making his quiet moans fill the air. Yanking back on her hair, Joel pulled her mouth from his length enjoying the way she stared up at him when he wrapped his fingers back around his saliva covered length. “I’m going to fuck you so hard that you’ll be thinking of me all the way throughout your party tonight. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Professor Miller,” she swallowed down hard, her wet lips shining when he smirked down at her. “I’m yours to do whatever you want with me.”

“Good girl,” Joel moved around the desk, reaching for her pants to roughly tug them further down her legs. Kicking her feet apart, he moved in behind her and stroked over his body noticing the way that she shook at his closeness. “Do you think you deserve a nice present before I get what I want from you?”

“Please,” she begged, her fingers curling tighter around the edge of the desk feeling Joel kneeling down behind her. Dragging his fingers across her bottom led her to pant before he firmly smacked over the lower part of her ass again making her cry out.

“You’re my bad girl, aren’t you?” Joel hummed caressing his hands down over her thighs squeezing at her flesh before caressing back up over them again. “Say it.”

“I’m your bad girl,” she whispered whimpering out when she felt Joel’s warm breath hovering over the most intimate parts of her. “I’m yours…”

“Yes, you are,” he growled out, pressing a wet kiss over her core making her tense up. Closing her eyes, she felt Joel’s mouth kissing over her heated flesh before dragging his tongue out through her folds. Gasping, she enjoyed Joel’s tongue teasing long lines from her clitoris to her entrance and it made her rock back against his movements. The sounds Joel made while he ate her out were like music to her ears and it turned her on all the more. When his tongue focused at her entrance it made her whimper out and the sensation of his hot tongue pushing inside of her made her coo. The movements of his tongue along with the suction of his lips over her body had her shaking against him and he chuckled against her flesh. “You’re not being quiet.”

“You don’t want me to be quiet,” she gasped when his tongue started to lap at her body again knowing that he was proud of what he was able to work out of her. Her breaths were uneven when she felt her thighs shaking. “Joel.”

A warmth rushed throughout her body, her eyes slamming shut when Joel got her to an orgasm making her whole body tremor. Without giving her time to come down from her high, Joel swiftly got up to his feet and grabbed a firm hold of her hips. Bringing her back against him, he reached between them and led his cock to her entrance thrusting his hips forward filling her completely making her arch up and away from him with a cry.

A moan fell from Joel’s throat while his thrusts started off immediately fast and hard making her cling tightly to the desk. His fingertips were digging hard into her hips undoubtedly going to leave a mark with how strongly he was holding onto her. Taking a moment to adjust, Joel pushed his pants and boxers down to his knees before he started smacking up against her harder. She was on her tiptoes, her body eagerly rocking back against him while he fucked her.

“You feel so good,” she cried out, her gasps filling the air with every powerful thrust that Joel made inside of her from behind. His grunts followed his thrusts and he already had her a shaking mess beneath him. With a huff, Joel adjusted her body to his liking and he leaned in over her. His fingers wrapped around the edge of the desk to give him leverage to help pound himself into her again and again. The desk was shaking with how hard he was fucking her and he wasn’t kidding when he told her that he was going to fuck her so hard that she would be feeling him later. “Joel.”

“Shhh…” Joel hummed biting at her earlobe enjoying the wet sounds their bodies made together. Releasing the desk with his left hand, he sank his fingers into her hair and put a bit of pressure at the beck of her neck while he continued to pound into her with unrelenting movements. Joel’s moan drew a liquid fire to flood her veins and she could feel a dampness sliding down her thighs. “You’re tight little pussy belongs to me, doesn’t it?”

“It’s only yours,” she declared, her whines following his movements. His fast fucking turned to slow, powerful thrusts that had her bouncing forward with every smack his hips made up against her bottom. Joel was using her like his own personal sex doll, but she didn’t care because she liked being made to be his. Winces fell from her throat with the meticulously powerful thrusts. His cock was throbbing inside of her and by the sounds he was making she knew that he was close to coming. Soon he was back at pounding away inside of her, his moans warm against her ear when his movements slowed down. Joel held her in place with his cock twitching inside of her, while he pumped her full of his cum. Joel pulled back and away from her, falling back onto the leather chair that was behind him where students would come to sit if they were really coming to his office to talk to him. Closing her eyes, she felt like the room was spinning around her. The warmth of Joel’s cum trailing down her thigh was felt when she looked back at him over her shoulder. Standing up on wobbly legs, she kicked out of the material of her pants and moved in over Joel in the chair. Grabbing a hold of his cock, she led it back inside of her, bouncing her hips over his length making him grunt. “Make me come…”

“Who says you deserve it?” Joel growled out, lifting his head up enough to meet her in a sloppy kiss, but instead of fighting her on it, his rough fingertips found her clitoris caressing over the sensitive bundle of nerves in strong, circular motions while she bounced her hips over his length. It didn’t take long before she tossed her head back letting out a cry. It allowed him to kiss down over the side of her neck and leave tiny bites over her flesh along the way. Y/N fell in against his chest and rest her head against Joel’s shoulders while his hand braced in over her lower back. “You’re wild darlin’.”

“I just had to get a ride in on my cowboy before we ended this,” she felt his cock softening inside of her and she pulled her hips up and away, but still remained over him enjoying the way it felt being this close to him. “You’re right, I’m going to feel you tonight still. That’s one of the hardest fucks you’ve ever given me.”

“Did you dislike it?” Joel tipped his head back to stare out at her seeing her smirk and shake her head.

“I loved it,” she assured him, stroking her thumb over his bottom lip allowing him to take it between his lips to nibble at her flesh. “Are you coming to my party tonight?”

“Y/N,” Joel slurred, pulling his lips away from her thumb with a huff. “You know I can’t do that. You’re going to have friends from the school there.”

“None of them are in this program, they won’t know who you are,” she maintained, her eyes full of awe for the man beneath her. “I’ve told my friends I’m in a relationship with an older man and they support it. They think it’s hot that I’m dating an older man.”

“Dating?” Joel repeated her words, his eyebrows bouncing up when she said that word.

“Well yeah, you’re my boyfriend,” she pointed out making Joel straighten up underneath her and she saw something change in his face while he stared out at her. “I mean that’s what you would call this, right? Dating? We spend a lot of time together. Go on trips together. Buy each other things. Spend nights together…”

“I mean…” Joel’s lips parted, his brown eyes searching hers and it was clear that he was uneasy with the conversation that they were having. “Why would you tell your friends about me? If the college found out that we were sleeping together I would be fired, Y/N.”

“I don’t tell them that you’re my professor. How we met doesn’t matter,” she stroked her fingers over the center of his chest making Joel scoff in response. “They don’t need to know that you were impressed with my work and when you called me in here to talk about my skills our chemistry just skyrocketed. The only thing they know is that you flirted with me and swept me off my feet with your quiet, southern charm.”

“I can’t go to your party tonight Y/N. I have a daughter, remember?” Joel reminded her making her lick her lips and he adjusted her over him so that way they had some distance. “Sarah is fourteen and I can’t just leave her alone to go to some college party.”

“What about your brother?” Y/N pushed making Joel snort, his brow line creasing when she was visibly desperate to have him in her life tonight. “I think Tommy can handle Sarah for one night, don’t you think?”

“No, we have a movie night tonight,” Joel reflected her suggestion, reaching down to grab his pants to pull them back over his hips and she suddenly felt uncomfortable seeing his reaction to things. “Every Friday we spend together since her mother left us.”

“Well,” she thought about what he was telling her and she reached out to palm in over the side of Joel’s face, teasing her fingers through his facial hair. “Maybe I can blow off the party tonight and I can meet Sarah for the first time? I can bring over a pizza and maybe some ice cream.”

“You don’t have to give up your party to meet my daughter,” Joel stammered getting his pants back together while she worked to pull her pants up and over her hips. “It’s not that important.”

“Of course it is. I love you Joel, I want to meet your daughter,” she repeated what she had told him in the past hearing Joel inhale sharply and tip his head to the side. Joel moved her from over him and stood up heading over toward his desk to sit down on the edge of it folding his arms in front of his chest. “Why is it you respond like that every time I tell you I love you?”

“Because it’s too fast,” Joel answered with a stressed sound, reaching back to stroke his fingers in over the back of his neck.

“But we’ve been doing this for over a year and a half now,” she pointed out making Joel tense up and he shrugged his shoulders. “It’s not like we’re just fucking Joel. We’ve been out on dates, we’ve traveled together…I’ve given you a significant amount of money for your company.”

“And I appreciate that,” Joel threw his hand up in the air making her chest ache while she sat in the chair before him. Joel’s breathing was heavy and she could feel a lump developing in her throat. “I know it was a lot to ask you for that loan and I appreciate you doing it for me. I appreciate all the gifts and the money you’ve given me. It means a lot to me.”

“But not enough for you to tell me you love me?” she stammered seeing him grimace when she mentioned him loving her. “Listen, you can just keep whatever present you got me for my birthday and replace it with an I love you. Just once.”

“I didn’t get you a gift for your birthday,” Joel confessed, his brown eyes full of a certain emotion she couldn’t read when she felt her chest ache. “The sex was your gift.”

“I just…” she felt her breath getting taken from her lungs and she immediately nodded her head. When it was Joel’s birthday, she went out of her way to give him the best birthday possible. Showering him with gifts, taking him out somewhere nice and even giving him a trip to the beach after he talked about longing to go one day. “Okay.”

“You’re disappointed,” Joel commented seeing that her face was turning a shade of red when she looked down at the ground before her.

“No, I just…” she lied to him looking up at him with a dampness in her eyes making Joel drastically bob his head about and look over toward the time. “Am I keeping you?”

“You know that I can’t keep you in here for too long. People would get suspicious,” Joel explained looking to the watch that she knew his daughter had given to him on his birthday. “Why don’t you just text me later and let me know how your party was.”

“Maybe we can go out to dinner before the party?” she stood from the seat feeling a chill flooding her spine hoping for more from Joel. “Maybe that little diner that you like? We can get a couple of shakes, burgers and fries. Then after we can share some of that pie that…”

“I have to pick Sarah up and take her to soccer practice,” Joel interjected before she could make a further suggestion. Joel stood up and moved around the desk to reach for something in the top drawer and she saw it was his keys.

“Maybe I can come and…” she started to mutter but Joel put his hand up in the air to cut her off and shake his head. “Is there something wrong with me? Am I not good enough to meet your daughter? I thought you liked me…”

“I do like you, but it would just be…weird,” Joel answered with a shake of his head making her let out a shuddering breath. “Hey Sarah, here is this girl that is my student. We hang out sometimes…just thought you would like to meet her.”

“So I’m good enough to have a pussy full of your cum and I’m good enough to give you nice things and go on trips with, but I’m not good enough to meet your daughter or brother? Or have any part of your life?” she inquired knowing that for a while she realized she wasn’t getting back in the relationship with Joel what she was giving him, but she just thought it was because of his ex-wife hurting him like she did in the past and he was just genuinely a shyer guy.

“Watch what you say,” Joel hushed her looking toward the door making her roll her eyes and shake her head.

“Do you really only see our relationship as us just hanging out?” she thought back on what he said making Joel grumble under his breath. “Am I just your student to you? The last time we spent the night together you spent all night holding me and the things that you said…”

“You are my student,” Joel reminded her making her chest tighten when he shrugged his shoulders. “I’m sorry it’s not the answer you want, but everything you want is too complicated for me right now. I need relaxed in my life. I have so much going on and what you’re asking for is just too much.”

“We’ve almost been together two years Joel. I get if this was the first few months, but I think we started doing this a year and nine months ago,” she educated him on the amount of time they had been fooling around with one another. “It would be one thing if it was less than a year, but you’ve asked me to be loyal to you. To only be with you. And as far as I knew, I was the only person you were sleeping with too.”

“You are, but it’s more of a case if I’m having unprotected sex with you, I didn’t want to be fucking all the boys on campus too,” Joel noted making her let out an offended breath and he threw his hands up in the air. “I just think sex feels better without a condom and you were willing to do it, so I thought we just had an agreement with that.”

“You know if you dedicate yourself to one person with sex, that usually means you’re dating them,” she commented making Joel’s nose wrinkle. Lowering his head into his palm, he was very uneasy with this discussion and she let out an offended breath. “Are you breaking up with me?”

“I can’t break up with someone that I was never dating to begin with,” Joel snorted making her heart sink hearing him pronounce the words with a firmness to his tone. “I just don’t want to introduce you to my family. I also don’t want to tell you I love you because what we have, it’s just not…”  

“Wow,” she felt her body shaking and she headed over toward her bag that she dropped at the corner of his office. Instead of listening to this any longer, she knew that she couldn’t take it and had to leave. “Thanks for the sex. It’s exactly what I wanted for my birthday.”

“Listen,” Joel began, standing up straight reaching out in attempts to touch her, but she pulled back and away from him. “You have to understand…”

“No, I get it,” she held her hand up in the air making Joel’s eyes narrow and he gave her a glare that made his chiseled jawline flex. “God, I’m stupid. This is already off to a great birthday. Enjoy your day with Sarah, I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable.”

“Would you just,” Joel stammered only for her to pull open the door to storm out of his office. Heading for the front of the building that she was in, she felt like the world was spinning around her and she didn’t know how to handle the information she was just delivered.

“Slow down tiger,” a familiar deep, raspy voice rumbled from behind her when she shoved open the front door. Looking back over her shoulder she saw that her personal bodyguard that her father had on her for the last few years was resting back against the school smoking a cigarette. His dark sunglasses were over his eyes, his dimples sinking in when he stared out at her. “Where are you going in a rush?”

“Fucking hell Negan,” she snapped watching his head tip to the side and his eyebrow arched up over his sunglasses. His dimples sank in when he released a long line of smoke from his lungs making her look down toward the ground. At the moment she wanted to cry and have a meltdown but she was doing her best to keep it together. “I forgot they have you follow me every-fucking-where.”

“Kind of my job,” he clarified pulling the sunglasses from his face, hooking them at the top of his shirt while he stared out at her with his hazel eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she lied feeling like her heart was going to explode from how upset she was with what Joel had just said to her.

“We both fucking know that’s not true,” Negan took another puff of his cigarette before tossing it aside making her shrug her shoulders. “Did the professor fucking do something?”

“It doesn’t matter,” she disputed watching Negan push himself forward from the school to approach her and stare out at her with is expressive eyes. Negan reached out to grasp her jaw between his thumb and index finger noticing that she was quite upset.

“How much money did he ask for this time?” Negan queried making her roll her eyes when she pulled away from Negan and shook her head. “Do I need to go fucking kick his ass? Did he do something that…”

“Stop,” she reached for Negan, grabbing a hold of his arm and pulling him back to her. “I just made the mistake of thinking my relationship with him was something more than it actually was.”

“What do you mean?” Negan’s face scrunched up, visible confusion flooding his features while he stared out at her. “Pretty sure you’re fucking dating him.”

“Apparently not,” she snorted thinking about all the things she had done with Joel over the last year and a half. After all they had done together, she just assumed they were a couple and even though he hadn’t told her he loved her, she thought she was working Joel up to it. “You never told my father about him, right?”

“Of course not. You asked me to keep it as our secret and it is. Your father never asks where you go or where the money you spend is going. Even if he did ask me about your potential lovers, my loyalty lies with you. Not your father,” Negan promised making her sigh loudly when he placed his hand in over the center of his chest. “He just pays me to keep you safe.”

“He pays you to follow me around like a stalker,” she reminded him waving him on to follow her so they could walk through campus together.

“You know there was a point in time where you actually enjoyed the idea of it,” Negan teased her, nudging her playfully with his shoulder while they walked side by side. “If I remember correctly, you were head over heels for me.”

“And you were married,” she frowned making Negan stop walking and his Adam’s apple bounced in his throat. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have mentioned her. I know it’s still sensitive with her passing and…”

“It’s fine,” Negan held his hand up in the air and it made her eyes fall to the wedding rings that he still wore on a necklace around his neck. Growing up, she had the biggest crush on Negan having him be her bodyguard. Anyone who was around him as much as she was would have fallen in love with him too. With his wildly naughty, cocky attitude and one of the most stunning smiles she had ever seen in her life, it made it hard for her not to fall for him. Physically, Negan was the man of her dreams. Tall dark and handsome defined him completely and she was in love with him for a significant part of her life, but the number one problem was that he was already taken by his childhood sweetheart. Lucille. So any attempts she made on Negan in the past were quickly shut down because he was head over heels in love with his wife. And it was only recently that he had ended up losing her to pancreatic cancer. Just talking about her sometimes would make Negan very emotional and since her passing the two of them had gotten a lot closer as friends. In fact, Negan was probably her best friend and her bodyguard. He was there all the time so he knew everything. More than anyone knew. And in a way she liked it because she knew she had someone she could be completely honest with. It just so happened that she used to have the biggest crush on him for a long time. Negan reached up to brush his fingers against his wedding ring that was there along with his late wife’s ring. “I’m going to have to get used to talking about her at some point.”

“Give me your hand,” she held her hand up seeing the way that Negan’s nose wrinkled and he tipped his head to the side. “Just give me your damn hand.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan allowed her to take his hand and she hooked her fingers with his leading them to hold hands while they walked through the campus together. “I feel like a teenage boy again holding hands with a pretty girl.”

“Listen, I need someone to hold my fucking hand so I don’t have a complete and total meltdown,” she informed Negan feeling him stop when she stated that and she shrugged her shoulders when she gazed over at him. “And I’m pretty sure you need someone to hold your hand sometimes too.”

“Is this guy still in his office?” Negan questioned, pulling her forward to stare down at her seeing the way that her eyes were tearing over. “That’s it, I’m going to go fucking kick his ass…”

“No,” she begged, pulling him back to her so that way he was staring down at her with his big hazel eyes. Negan’s palm pressed in over the side of her face and he swallowed down hard when she leaned into his touch. “I was just stupid Negan. It was my own fault. I wanted a relationship so bad that I was reading everything…wrong. I’m just so used to no one wanting me that it felt good having something with Joel.”  

“I could have told you fucking your professor wasn’t going to go anywhere. It was an abuse of power on his end and…” Negan started to vent but was cut off by the feeling of Y/N pressing her fingers in over his lips to silence him. When he stopped talking, he felt her dragging her fingers through his short beard and he sighed. Hooking his arms around her, he pulled her into a tight hug and stroked his fingers over the back of her neck. Squeezing her tightly in his arms, he leaned down and pressed a quick kiss over her forehead. “Come to the Mustang. I have something for you.”

With a simple nod, she followed Negan to his black classic Mustang that he owned. Negan held his finger up and motioned her to wait a minute when he opened the passenger’s side door. Leaning down he reached for something from the back and she let out an amused sound when he brought out some balloons and he was holding a six-pack of cupcakes in his hands.

“Happy birthday,” Negan offered up a weak smile holding out the things in his hands making her smile when he did it.

“You remembered,” she breathed out seeing his dimples sink in and he gave her a small nod. “I didn’t think you remembered when I didn’t see you this morning.”

“I was too busy driving out to that special little bakery you like to get you these,” Negan informed her making her touched to know that he went out of his way today to get her something that she liked. “I know how much you love the cupcakes from there and I just, I wanted to do something nice for your fucking birthday.”

“Well, you’re going to have to share them with me,” she reached out to accept the balloons and the cupcakes finding herself amused with the whole balloon aspect of things. Negan so far was the only person to make some kind of positive impact for her on her birthday and she appreciated it. “You know I can’t eat six of them by myself.”

“I can do that,” Negan muttered and she took a minute to think about things before stepping up on her toes to press a quick kiss at Negan’s cheek. “Get in…”

“Yes sir,” she nodded her head allowing Negan to help her into the passenger seat of his Mustang and she knew if this was how things were when she was younger, she would be swooning over Negan doing something nice for her on her birthday. Unfortunately she was still upset with the way things went down with Joel and that was heavy in her heart, but she was doing her best not to have a meltdown. When he got back into the car, he pulled his sunglasses back in over his face and looked over at her. “You taking me home?”

“No, I’m taking you out to dinner on the water. Give you some time to relax before you are surrounded by a shitload of people tonight,” Negan answered her with a big smile making her throat tense up knowing that it was something that she wanted Joel to do with her. Negan must have caught the expression over her face and he frowned. “What?”

“You don’t have to do this just because you are my bodyguard and have to be around me,” she claimed making him frown, pushing his sunglasses down his face to allow his hazel eyes to connect with hers. “I’m sure there is something else you would rather be doing with your time.”

“No, I want to spend my evening with you, doing something nice for your birthday,” Negan winked starting up the car noticing the way that she was staring out at him. “So stop worrying. Everything is as I want it.”

Instead of fighting with him she allowed him to take her where he wanted. It surprised her when they got to the restaurant and they led them outside to the table that had more balloons there along with a bouquet of flowers. It made her stop in her footsteps and Negan moved in behind her to place his hand in over her shoulder, “What?”

“What would you have done if I would have went with Joel somewhere?” she asked knowing that this was something that Negan obviously had planned for her long before just deciding to randomly take her here for her birthday.

“Then I would have called and cancelled,” Negan led her over toward the table and held the chair out for her. After she sat Negan took the seat across from her and she felt bad knowing that this is what she wanted to be doing with the man she thought was her boyfriend. Taking his sunglasses off, Negan noticed the way she was staring out at him and he threw his hands up in the air. “You talk about having shitty birthdays all the time and I just wanted to make sure that you had a semi-decent one.”

“I don’t deserve you after all the shit I’ve put you through,” she lifted up from her seat to lean across the table to press a lingering kiss over the side of his face. Negan smirked when she sat back down in her seat. “I bet you would have never thought you would still be here years ago.”

“Years ago I was just thankful to have a job. Going from having a promising career in baseball to hurting myself and needing a job was rough,” Negan explained thinking back on his life working with Y/N. “You may have given me a run for my money, but I enjoy my job.”

“I’m sure the money you make isn’t all that bad,” she thought about the people that worked for her father and she heard Negan scoff. “You know, you never told me how you ended up with this job. Being stuck with me.”

“I don’t view it that way,” Negan shook his head, rolling his eyes when he reached for the glass of water that was before him. “I got the job because Simon owed me. We knew each other previously, I was in the minor leagues for baseball and I looked to have a promising career ahead of me, but I got injured. Lucille and I just got married, I needed money and he hooked me up with this job taking care of a wild and unruly teenager of some rich hotshot. And I thought, how hard could it be?”

“And then you met me,” she joked looking down at the menu that was before her knowing that this was a place she had come many times before and Negan obviously knew that she liked it. “I probably drove you crazy.”

“Sometimes,” Negan tipped his head to the side and gave her a wink. Reaching for something beside him, Negan grabbed a hold of the bag that he brought with him into the restaurant. “I know this is kind of goofy considering the circumstances, but this is your last present from me today…”

“What?” her eyebrows bounced up seeing that he was handing something across the table to her. Accepting the bag, she pulled it into her lap and reached inside to reveal the leather-bound sketchbook that Negan had gotten for her.

“I know you have people that are going to give you incredible gifts tonight that are going to make that feel stupid, but I always see you sketching on things and since this is going to be your profession I thought you might like having one that looked…fuck, I don’t know…nice,” Negan waved his hand around seeing the way that she smiled while she opened it and flipped through the pages. “I saw it and it made me think of you so I got it for you.”

“Thank you, Negan,” she found herself in awe of the man before her knowing that with their history together she was so surprised that Negan still liked her as much as he did. She really did give him hell when she was a teenager and in her early twenties so she was thankful for his kindness toward her. “Can I ask you a personal question?”

“Go for it,” Negan got comfortable in his seat, tipping his head to the side when he gave her his full attention.

“You and Joel are around the same age,” she began seeing the expression over his face change when she brought up Joel to him and she knew that Negan was never a fan of the guy to begin with. “Do you find me to be overbearing? Am I wrong for thinking that we were dating after a year and a half? I wanted to meet his daughter and he had a meltdown about it. Called me just some student.”

“Y/N, I don’t like him,” Negan explained with a loud rumble of a groan, reaching to pinch at the bridge of his nose when he leaned forward in his seat. “I think the problem in the whole relationship was him and not you.”

“Just answer the question Negan,” she pleaded knowing that she probably sounded pathetic and desperate, but in a sense she was.

“Your relationship started because he took advantage of you. He called you to his office and told you that he wanted to talk about how well you were exceeding in his classes and then seduced you into sleeping with him. Because you’re attracted to older men you were eager to get the attention from an older man…” Negan reasoned with her making her face flush over when he reminded her of how her relationship with Joel started. “You know how uncomfortable you were when he asked you for money the first time, but you’re too goddamn nice and you liked him so much that you were willing to do whatever it took to keep him happy. To answer your question, most people who are dating a year would have no problem introducing their daughter to the person they were with. People who go on trips together are often considered dating too. So no, I don’t think you’re overbearing for wanting to get closer to Joel. I think it’s fucked up he’s your professor and I think there is something incredibly shady about him, but…”

“I know how you feel about Joel. You tell me all the time,” she reminded him with a shake of her head hating that she let Joel get to her so much but she really liked him and she put a lot of effort into their relationship over the last year. “I just wonder if there is a problem with me. My mother left me. My father can’t stand me. I’ve had boyfriends, but never anything super serious. The one time I think I’ve fallen in love with someone…”

“You’re surrounded by shitty people Y/N,” Negan reasoned with her hating that she was going to these thoughts because of Joel upsetting her like he did. “It’s a hard pill to swallow, but a lot of the world fucking sucks. You’re a good person in a shady fucking family. Of course you are going to feel lonely in that environment. You don’t have the attitude of a rich person. You’re humble, caring, kind…”

“After I graduate, I’m going to be poor as hell,” she chuckled seeing Negan scoff at the thing that her father told her. “Will you still like me then?”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Negan reached out across the table for her hand and gave it a firm squeeze. “It’s not the money that kept me here and you know that. I care about you. I always have and no matter what your father does, I will always be in your life.”

Squeezing her fingers around Negan’s, she appreciated the sentiment and felt good knowing that no matter what happened in her life, there would always be someone she knew that she could count on. It made her happy to know that Negan was that person.  

“I feel like I was just being a pathetic, clingy child with Joel and I feel pitiful,” she admitted to Negan focusing on the way that his thumb stroked over the back of her hand. “Is this what all men are like when they get in serious relationships? I’ve told him that I love him multiple times at this point and every time he turns pale and starts sweating. Why do the things he’s doing with me if he doesn’t want a relationship of some kind?”

“Y/N…” Negan slurred, his eyebrows bouncing up with his fingers curling tighter around hers. “Are you sure you’re the only student that he is doing this with? For all you know, this could just be something that he does. Takes advantage of the power he holds over people as their professor and...”

“That’s not what this was Negan. I was just doing really good in his classes and he wanted to pull me aside. Told me that he knew people that would be interested in my work if I kept up doing what I was. It was just when the two of us were together there was this chemistry,” Y/N informed Negan feeling his fingers slowly slipping from hers and he leaned back in his chair visibly uncomfortable. “Negan, while he may have seduced me, I could tell he hadn’t been with someone in a very long time. He tried to pretend to be confident, but he was still nervous. I think after his wife abandoned him and his daughter, he shut himself down. Joel is complicated.”

“Men aren’t as complicated as you think they are,” Negan retorted with a snort, tapping his fingers at the top of the table while they waited for someone to come and take their order. “Listen, you are a good catch, but some people see you and they get the wrong idea. You’re beautiful, sweet, passionate, talented…but sometimes people are going to see your last name and they are going to take advantage of how good you are.”

“Joel isn’t like that,” she combated making Negan throw his hands up in the air in a defensive movement. “Joel isn’t the type that cares about politics or money.”

“He asked you for money, he knows you have the money Y/N. How did he know that?” Negan pushed, leaning forward in his seat trying to keep quiet since there were other people near them.

“I talked to him about my life quite a bit Negan. He knew what my life was like and he knew that I had an endless supply of money because of my dad. You know my dad. He allows me to do whatever I want without asking. I love Joel and I would do whatever it takes…” she rambled on watching Negan’s thick eyebrows arch up and she felt her chest tightening. “It’s not about the money Negan.”

“You’re not pathetic for falling in love with someone Y/N. You’re a hopeless romantic and I can’t fault you for that. I fucking get it,” Negan placed his hand in over the center of his chest and cleared his throat when he could see they were getting prepared to come get their orders. “Plus, Joel has been playing with your feelings and emotions. Dragging you along so you do what he wants. Whether it’s sex or money…”

“It’s not about the money Negan,” she stressed thinking back on the moments that she shared with Joel previously. “I think his ex-wife just really hurt him. He has a lot going on in his head. There are moments where he is really cold, but then there are those moments where he is holding me in bed some nights where it just feels special. Unlike anything I’ve felt before. I think he really combats his thoughts a lot. He wants to be loved and to have a relationship, but at the same time he’s scared to.”

“I think you think too fucking highly of him,” Negan declared making her frown and they both went silent when the waitress came to their table to take their orders. After the waitress left Negan noticed that Y/N was deep in her thoughts and he shook his head. “Y/N, I’m not trying to be mean here. You know I support whatever decisions you make. I just want you fucking happy, but there has been some rather big fucking red flags. I would know because for a big part of my life I was a walking red flag. I was a fucker in my younger years. So I just want you to be careful.”

With a simple nod, she looked to her phone and sighed when she saw that Joel hadn’t texted her or anything after she left his office. If there was something more between the two of them, she thought maybe he would have contacted her, but he didn’t.

“Everything you’ve done here is everything I wanted Joel to do today,” she silently muttered making Negan frown, nodding his head slowly. “I’m starting to think you’re the only person that truly sees me for me Negan. Maybe the world forced it to be that way, but you see me.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Negan gave her a wink sliding closer to the table, tipping his head down in attempts to get her eyes to connect with his. “While you’re with me, try to forget him and enjoy yourself. If you need to still talk about him, I won’t shut you the fuck down, but I want you happy and I think the more you think about Joel the sadder you are going to be.”

“I’ll do my best,” she gave him a weak smile knowing that Negan was trying harder than anyone in her life right now to make her happy and she appreciated the gesture. So she was going to give him the best of her right now. It’s what he deserved for trying to make her happy. It wasn’t normal for people to go out of their way for her to make her happy so she was very thankful for that. So that’s what she did. Did her best to ignore her feelings on Joel and it was nice to actually have a few moments of downtime with Negan. It really did feel like at this point that Negan was the only person that she could be herself with and not have to worry about impressing him. Hopefully that feeling never changed with him because he was way too important to her for her to lose now.

----

Tags: @jennydehavilland @de-gabyconamor @ibelongtonegan @smallsadjellyfish @labyrinthofheartagrams  @msjamesmarch @thebeautysurrounds @hotfornegan @redmercysugar @caprithebunny @tuttifuckinfruitty @emoryhemsworth @a-girl-interupted @akumune @stoneyggirl2 @xsarcasticwriterx  @insertneganhere @haleygreen23 @xhannahbananax03 @sanctuaryforthelost @burningredaffair @killaweiser @dead-of-niight  @ayumi-wolf @hollyismentallyillhelp @tone-stark @thesapphirequeen  @wonwoosthetic​ @misskittydenoire​ @casangel1986​

[bunnysbrainrot]

Pick a Character to Start Kinktober

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