#need someone to understand how I feel ong

[supernaturalperson67]

Please I need to know if anyone out there has read the missing series and loves it as much as I do because I am crying and I need someone to understand

[sprite-writes-fanfic]

When the ‘03 Turtles are in love!

🐢💙❤️2003 TMNT x Reader💜🧡🐢

Word Count: 889

CW: Gender-neutral reader as always, referred to as ‘you’, my underrated beloveds ong, (especially Donnie 💜), nothing but fluff! Turtles realizing they’re in love with you and how they act around you!! (+ confessions because yes <3)

🐢💙Leonardo💙🐢

💙 With Leo, it takes him a good while to realize he’s in love with you. It just randomly hits him when he’s meditating, the comfort you bring, the way he can lean on you, the way he’s always seemingly drawn to you! It hits him like a bus.

💙 He gets a little shy and distant with you, but don’t give up! Continue coming to him and acting like yourself, he’ll feel a bit guilty for avoiding you, but you still coming to him makes his heart flips and he’s feeling those butterflies.

💙 That’s when Leo can’t take it anymore and finally confides in Master Splinter, (which we both know that man knows when his sons are in love). Splinter is pleasantly surprised! But he’s happy to help his son sort out his feelings and even devise ways to confess to you.

💙 Finally, Leo works up the courage and asks you to go to the training dojo with him alone, to train. You two do train and by the end of it, Leo finally spills it, confessing his love to you, but also expressing his understanding if you didn’t feel the same.

💙 Pleasantly surprised when you admit to feeling the same way! Man is fist-pumping the air mentally when you confess. After that, you two spent more time together in the dojo, just talking things out and making it official with a hug, (a kiss will come later, Leo’s not ready to make that quick of a step!)

🐢❤️Raphael❤️🐢

❤️ With this emotional turtle, Raph is quick to realize, unlike his brothers, and at first; he’s frustrated. He didn’t NEED feelings, especially not towards a family friend, a human… A very beautiful human at that—

❤️ Okay, he gives up and comes to terms with the fact, Raph, the tough guy with anger issues, has soft feelings for YOU. (Bro went through the 5 stages of grief because of this/j)

❤️ And after coming to that conclusion, man is always trying to impress you, he gets closer to you, wants you to depend on him because he wants to be that someone for you! It strokes his ego quite a bit too.

❤️ It’s when he finally realizes he wants to be with you he shoots his shot. What’s the worst they could say? No? So, one night when you join him on patrol and you two are chilling on a roof, he finally confesses. And he’s straight to the point like, “Look uh, this is gonna sound weird, but I have feelings for you.”

❤️ Dude is so hyped when you say you feel the same way too. Raph isn’t the type to wait around either like Leo, on that rooftop was where you two shared (his) your first kiss.

🐢💜Donatello💜🐢

💜 When Donnie realizes, he panics a little actually. YOU are his best friend, and he’s completely shocked when he realizes that his heart thunders in his chest and his palms get sweaty when YOU are around, (*slow fade-in of the demi-romantic flag*).

💜 He tries to shut down these feelings as best as he can by working on his technology more and being distant with everyone, and I mean EVERYONE.

💜 Even then he can’t stay away for too long, he’s back to ranting and rambling about his inventions to you, and his breath hitches whenever you smile at and tell him, “Go on”, whenever he pauses and apologizes for rambling again.

💜 Donnie has to tell you, if he gets rejected now, hopefully these feelings will go away, right? He didn’t even consider the fact that you could possibly like him back, according to his statistics, the likelihood of a mutant and a human together is low!

💜 Well, when he sat you down for a serious conversation, going on to admit his feelings and saying he wouldn’t be hurt if you said no— Wait what? You were quick to interrupt him and tell him you liked him back?? He had to process a moment before he would shyly ask if you wanted to go for a small ride in the Battle Shell around town. (You two held hands while he drove. <3)

🐢🧡Michelangelo🧡🐢

🧡 Woof, Mikey on the other hand is a bit of a wild card, at first he confuses platonic with romance, but when his brothers point out to him the obvious, he’s all for it!

🧡 Mikey is the type to start reading comics and watch movies that involve romance so he has an idea of what to do, (and yes, he kicks his feet all giddy-like when he’s doing this).

🧡 After he’s obtained his knowledge, he’s quick to try and impress you and reenact some moments from the movies he’s watched, always saying quotes you probably wouldn’t understand. And when you don’t get it at first, thinking he’s just being Mikey, he’s a little bummed…

🧡 Then Raph has to point it out to him why his advances aren’t working, because he’s not really acting any different, and just tells Mikey to grow a pair and to tell you honestly. And that’s when Mikey’s new plan is sent into action, operation confession is a go!

🧡 Still a little confusing because he’s still making references but he’s got the spirit. Eventually he ends up forgetting the movie references and out-right tells you. And it’s safe to say, you guys have a roof-top date coming up here soon.

Gaaah, I’ve been obsessing over TMNT good lord. I wanted to write about them, and I’ll probably write more about them too 😭💙 Love turtle pookies ong, hope you enjoyed, and yes I posted the same day, I am motivated to write. ✍️

[sonysakura]

🚫 My Sonic Big Bang 2024 Experience

...Or how a few months of my life were severely negatively impacted by someone else's bad management. See for yourself.

Proof of the rule they're speaking about being actively hidden from the participants to this day: FAQ – archived link, screenshot with "Who can participate?" on top, screenshot with "explicit" word search, screenshot with "nsfw" word search; Master Guide – screenshot with "explicit" word search, screenshot with "nsfw" word search; server rules – long screenshots of General Server Rules and StH Big Bang Specific Rules: Mar 12 and Jul 01, screenshots of Strike Policy: Mar 12 and Jul 01, long screenshot of General Guidelines, long screenshot of Collaboration Thread Guidelines.

I feel like this is extremely unfair 😭 One moment I was participating in the event I dreamed about for years, and the next moment I'm thrown out into the cold when I did nothing wrong. I need to get it off my chest...

Below, more about my experience with the event, though it ended up a little vent-y, a detailed (and verified!) record of what exactly happened in private thread #48, the aftermath and some fun facts I discovered or want to share:

First things first! Yep, I signed up for Sonic BB as a Writer back in January. I didn't talk about it outside of my server 'cause I wanted it to be a surprise – when I roll out a lo-o-ong illustrated fic without a warning. I'll admit, I always wanted to participate in a Big Bang for this fandom, it was a dream of sorts. And still, before sending my form in, I carefully read all of the Master Guide and the FAQ both. Seeing as how for my neurodivergent brain the rules and regulations are important, that's what I usually do for events, and this one wasn't an exception. Confident that I understand what the event would require of me, I signed up.

First month of the event went well. My questions were answered (even though I wondered why some of the things I asked couldn't have been in the Master Guide from the beginning), I wrote my fic summary and submitted it without many problems, etc. There was a small hiccup at the very beginning of March when I noticed how strict the management seemed to be (no changes or adjustments allowed), and my anxiety got the best of me, so I asked the mods if there's a plan in case a collab team doesn't work out: screenshot of my message in #writers-info-and-questions, pulled from my Discord data; screenshot of my detailed explanation in DMs; screenshot of Mod Joy's reply. Here are the most important quotes from his reply:

I understand wanting to plan for the worst case scenarios, but I would caution you not to freak yourself out over what all could go wrong! There are some absolutely lovely artists in this event who are excited to work with the writers. Odds are, things will go off without a hitch.

We are highly encouraging that no one drops out after the assignments, especially writers, unless due to extenuating circumstances.

We want to make everything as fun and stress-free for everyone. Know that we will be around to moderate threads and dissolve any tensions that arise,..

In short, I was placated with reassurances of careful moderation, not dropping writers and ✨positivity✨. I decided to stay and challenge myself since originally BB is meant to be a challenge and all...

For those of you who haven't participated: the way it is supposed to go is that writers submit short summaries of their stories, these summaries are stripped of the writers' names and given to artists to pick through. The artists then have to list their Top 10 stories to illustrate during the claims period. After the claims, private collab threads are made for each writer and their artists with a couple of mods. So no one else could see what happens in these threads.

Now flashforward to March 11th and the threads being created. Obviously I don't have screenshots of that due to being kicked off the server without any warning and before any chance of communication, unable to delete my personal information or save anything that might be used against me which was a case of poor management at best and a deliberate move at worst, so I'm retelling as faithfully as possible. It also has been verified by [artist 1] and according to them, this is exactly what happened.

My fic was in the 4-8k range, and I got two artists. I was asleep when the thread opened, and they talked about how excited they are for my fic before I came in. Both of them are 18, young but adults. I’ll call them [artist 1] (they're cool), and the other one is [artist 2]. Both artists seemed to talk to me normally.

Oh, I have to point out that there were hmm, Mods Chaz, Joy, Summers and Frostios in my thread. I think only four of them, but I know for sure Mod Summers was reading our conversation at least in the beginning because I noticed my fic's Warnings saying "None" (the original summary I submitted had Warnings: Discussion of Homophobia, Slight Internalised Homophobia), and I pointed out that there are warnings, though I don't know if they were lost just now or weren't in the sheet available to the Artists either, and whether they were actually lost or mods didn't consider it a big enough warning to keep... I still don't know. Mod Summers just silently pinned my message.

I mentioned how I'm in one of the Asian timezones geographically, so I might be awake or asleep at unconventional times, and they told me their timezones (I didn't ask!), so I figured I can make a timebuddy chart for easy tracking what time it is for everyone. Made one, sent the link to the thread, Mod Summers asked me if I want it pinned, too, and then a couple of hours later (I think?) [artist 1] came and said it's very helpful. This is my evidence for at least Mod Summers probably reading the conversation that followed but also maybe not. I think all of the mods were online or at least visually online when it was happening.

This is where I reveal that the entire conversation happened in like... one afternoon 🥲 Roughly 7 pm to 2 am for me.

Back to the conversation itself. There were a few questions I had so I started with them, basically 1) if they've read my fics before (explained that I'm asking so I know whether I need to tell them about my writing style and Sonadow dynamics I write); 2) do they want me to send in scenes as I write them or they want a full draft; 3) if they have any immediate questions for me. Question 1) is what we need. Both of them said they've never read my stuff before, and that they don't have any questions now but they want art to be as close to text as possible, so they will ask in the future. This is how it went down after (as per my memory, artist rendition I guess):

[artist 1]: I haven't read your fics but I'd like to! Your Ao3 is the same as your handle? [no link]

Me: It isn't a requirement, you don't have to! But that's right. I have to warn you though that I usually rate my Ao3 profile as 18+ when I link it, though 33/36 of my Sonic fics are rated G and T, and I feel like a warning is in order anyway so people don't accidentally stumble upon something they don't want to see and know what to avoid/filter out. [I didn't post any links or encouraged the artists to read my profile, just made a warning to be cautious]

We go into discussion of how long I have been writing, [artist 1] shows no problems with knowing my Ao3 has 3 Mature fics, I describe what series my fic will be for [the series is completely SFW, and even then I didn't post the link to it] and go into details of how I write Sonadow dynamics in my fics without mentioning the NSFW ones obviously, we speak about Question 2).

[artist 2]: [replying to my warning about my Ao3] ooohh so you write gore sometimes?

Me: Nah, I don't actually, I'm pretty uncomfortable with it tbh, so no, I don't. Some blood and a quick description of Maria's dead body is the most I have ever done 😅 All the angst I make characters go through is emotional rather than physical!

[artist 2]: oh I shouldn't have assumed, sorry. It's just the first thing my mind went to

Me: It's okay! I've been a medical student at some point and I think I've just had enough of that - one of the main reasons I'm not a doctor but a linguist.

[artist 1] gets excited about this for some reason, and we chat about it for a moment.

Normal conversation continues like...

Me: Okay, where were we

[artist 2]: i wasn't paying attention errr

Me: Me neither! But it's Question 3)

I go into saying how them wanting to draw as close to the text is 💯 what I wanted to hear because for me my texts are an extension of my soul, I'm fragile about them, and I'd prefer the art to be exactly according to it blah-blah-blah, I describe my thoughts about a plan of work for us and how I'm going to share pieces of my fic according to their respective wishes.

[artist 1]: Sounds great!

[artist 2]: yeah, sounds good

[artist 1] says something else which I just react with an emoji to, and I start getting ready for sleep because it's almost 2 am, and I have to get up at 6 am.

Nothing else was said in the thread. That's it.

I got to bed and as most people nowadays I check my phone one last time. I see [artist 2] requesting a mod they can DM to, but I don't think much of it…

So 6 am. I wake up and again, as most people nowadays, I check my phone. I went to sleep in a good mood, seemingly in good relations with my artists, excited for the collab and having a solid plan everyone agreed to, so I eagerly open Discord to see if they wrote anything new in the thread. I see no Sonic Big Bang 2024 server.

I will not go into too much detail about my state, but I have an extremely acute reaction to stress very similar to a panic attack that lasts for hours. So with shaking fingers I open my DMs to see the message from that first screenshot I started my post with. The following exchange with me learning about the hidden rule happens the next day. Unfortunately, before that I still have to go to work for a full day in that very same mental state, oof. Plus I have no breaks on Tuesday... I go back and forth all day with my friends about how shitty this situation is, and one of them asks me how [artist 1] reacted. I say that I don't know, but they still follow me on Tumblr so I go and message them, and from what they tell me, it sounds like a mod pretended to them that I was removed because of an existing rule that's stated somewhere. They didn't argue with that, and that's understandable of course.

At home, I notice one of the event mods blocked me.

It is difficult to explain what's happening in my mind without going into details of what my [disorders] are, but things that are unfair, things that are injustice put my brain in a loop until all wrongs are righted. I'm ranting about it to friends, and I think about it day and night. On March 14th I vent about it in the tags of a related reblog, and this is the only instance of me talking about StH BB on my blog. Next morning I'm blocked by the event blog and over the next 2 weeks – by two more mods, while another mod speaks to me passively-aggressively in a shared Discord server. Then I'm shown a screenshot where one of the mods claims I offered my Ao3 to my artists (I didn't) and implies everyone who writes NSFW is dangerous. And then I receive a hate ask about the event, calling me "creepy"... All this time, my brain is still stuck in a loop, and let me tell you – it's not fun. It doesn't help that my first reaction to everything that makes me feel bad is always to assume I'm at fault for everything, and seeing how hostile people are to me, I'm drowning in self-blame. Without going into any more detail, it takes me 2 months and a lot of help to somewhat recover, so I finally send my reply to Headmod Chaz and receive one back:

If you got to this part, you know that half of Headmod Chaz's reply is simply untrue since there were no "multiple instances", and in any case I was never asked to keep quiet about my ban (and why should I?). I sent another reply a month later expressing my confusion and wondering when the messages will be removed (only my intro was removed). As of today, that reply is still ignored, and the messages aren't removed 🤷

And this is the entirety of my Sonic Big Bang 2024 experience. Now for some Q&A:

Why did you wait so long to make this post? I didn't want to put any participants under fire, particularly my friends because I'll admit, the mods seem like petty people. And also I was worried about throwing shade on other participants (people associating their works with this) or spoiling the event for people who were genuinely having fun with it. Thus, I waited until it was over!

Is this a callout post? According to definition as "public criticism or asking someone to explain their actions", I think it is – in terms of calling out bad management. It is definitely not a call for harassment. There is a reason I censored some names and left vague who reported me, blocked me, was hostile to me or spread rumours about me. Please don't bother anyone, and if the mods decide to engage with this, they can post their own statement.

Aside from the above reasons, why make a post at all? Two reasons: a personal one and an altruistic one. Firstly, I hope to get closure this way since I still feel like I was unjustly thrown away when I was just being a dutiful person. Secondly, while Headmod Chaz said they will be transparent about this rule next time they run an event, as you can see they fully ignored my suggestion of doing it now, and in general keeping a rule hidden to such an extent where you lie in your FAQ is pretty shady... I don't trust them not to do it again next year.

Is it okay to reblog the post/reply to it, what about sending an ask or a PM? Yes to all. I don't expect anyone to reblog, though if you think it's necessary, go on. I'm posting it to the event tags, so-o I think people who need to see it – will see it. If you decide to be negative or call me names, however, be prepared to be blocked by IP or username.

Finally, fun facts as promised 🔥

There are other participants out there who have had negative experiences with BB or were made uncomfortable by the way it was managed, but I'm not going to speak for them;

There was this whole thing with hypocrisy and possible favouritism;

Despite the mods insisting on ME being quiet about my ban, it's now known that they shared information about it outside the mod group;

Out of 6 mods: 5 have me blocked, 2 were passive-aggressive with 1 of them going as far as verbally lash out at me in DMs, and only 1 mod gave me a human apology (not pictured in screenshots);

I saw 3 NSFW writers and at least 2 NSFW artists participating in BB just by scrolling through my dash, without seeking them out, and this is not counting people I noticed in the server prior to me being banned;

Some people are posting Mature and Explicit extras and sequels/prequels to their BB stories already;

The artist who reported me seems to have dropped out anyway;

There's a joke reason why I'm making a post, too: I have to earn being blocked from the event blog since they said they did it because of multiple instances of me talking about my removal;

I'm actually grace and most of the time write my characters as aspec, and I'm exploring what sexuality and intimacy mean for me through writing, so this situation felt a little... like gatekeeping;

My fic was #48 under the title Chao Care 101, and I want you to give me a high five if you had it among your top choices 🖐

Originally, I wasn't going to complete my BB fic because it made me feel bad, but now I've decided I want to reclaim it, so I'm writing it now. Almost 8k words at the moment. It will be published. And it will be illustrated;

Meanwhile, what came out of this disaster is Sonic Supernova 2025, and I recommend you all to keep an eye out for this inclusive Big Bang-like event 🌟

[merlucide]

The matchmaker has found a match……

@thebestsetter your match is….

ISAGI YOICHI!

x kindhearted, fun, exciting, attentive, vb player, fem!reader

RAAAAAAAAGGHHH

OKAY, NOW HEAR ME OUT BOO.

Yes, he’s basic, yes he’s bland

but

BUT, he’s caring, responsible, competitive and a silly lil guy!!

Idk what trope but either Mutual Feelings or Childhood friends :3

tbh I think you’d like be like his ideal type too??

anywho-

You’d be like doing your own thing and he’d just stare at you a think ‘She’s so pretty..’

and then he realized ‘oh no, I like her!!’

He would find every excuse to be around you, oh you need someone to help you carry for science project? Well what do you know! Isagi is already picking it up!

Need some one to spike? Isagi is literally Hinata wym (his spikes are awful, but you teach him how to do it and then becomes decently good actually!)

He confesses on accident lmao

He had finally, FINALLY, mustered the courage to ask you out!!! After literal YEARS of pining after you. 💀

He was supposed to tell you to meet him at the fair, because he had something he wanted to tell you (confess) but instead of

’Hey- We are still good for the fair right? I have something I wanna tell you there :-)”

he said..

”I’m gonna ask you out at the fair- you’re coming still right?”

sigh, Isagi, Isagi, Isagi

and you are just like ‘??? Did I hear that right??”

and it takes him a second to realize what the flip he just said

he just turns all red and is stuttering out incoherent nonsense

he wanted to die so bad

and you’re also like terribly flustered and caught off guard by the sudden confession

You had a feeling he liked you, but you weren’t sure if he really did feel the same!!

you just awkwardly-nervously tell him you feel the same and answer his original question with a soft ‘yes’

and he’s just like ?!?!??

i’m sensing a theme here..

He actually, genuinely, CANNOT believe YOU like him

like WHAT. This pretty, smart, funny, amazing, perfect, girl- actually likes me?!?

‘..so like …. Um … are we like… dating .. now ?’ is all he says

Real smooth Isagi, real smooth 😐

You then ask if this fair is a date now

which he’s like ‘I guess it is’

You both do the awkward goodbye and he goes straight to the boys bathroom and splash’s water on his face

He was genuinely tweaking

And that’s how you two became a couple! :3

The fair date was really fun, but super awkward bc, Isagi 🙂‍↕️

He tried winning you those big stuffed animals, and failed miserably 💀

He really wanted to get it for you too— then you ask if you can try it

You win on the first try.

hes just like ‘🧍‍♀️’

super embarrassed lmaooooo- but super impressed

Also he like… wants to hold you hand… but is like overthinking it so bad

‘Is it too soon??’ ‘Yeah it’s too soon’ ‘Would she even like holding my hand??’ ‘No she wouldn’t’ —-

Doesnt end up holding your hand 😔

You both end your first date on the ferris wheel

You both just chat about wtv, and that you didn’t think he’d like you

and he’s like ‘WHAT’

After he walks you home he immediately changes your contact name “Y/N-san” to “my girlfriend y/n💙”

Now! General HCs! :3

Isagi is such a good hype man ong, like you’re not feeling your best? Well Isagi is gonna make you feel like a thousand bucks!!

He thinks you’re the most perfect person to exist and cannot fathom you thinking you’re anything else but that

super sweet when comforting too, he’ll either hold your hand, hold your shoulders, or actually hold you when he comforts you.

Btw he gets super pumped up at your vb games, he’s like wearing your school/jersey colors and cheering for you in the bleachers

At first he didn’t really understand how the game worked, since the only sport that exists to him is soccer 💀

Really likes playing volleyball with you! He’s really good at digging and passing and so-so at spiking. He’s STUNNING at setting, because of yours truly 😚 like yes, I taught him that 🥹

hes got a mean serve though 😋

Now!

for the affectionate scale! Id say he’s about a 8/10 tbh

Hes like a clingy cat who always wants to lay on your lap lmao

always holding your hand, ALWAYS.

is a sucker for cheek kisses omg ><

He gets all blushy-n-gushy when you kiss his cheeks (anywhere really, but cheek kisses are his fav!!)

He gets soooo flustered when you give him affection or he gives you affection

eventually he gets used to it but he still blushes when you give him some love <33

He loves the simple hugs :) He loves squishing his cheek against you shoulder/neck and rub circles around you waist, while you massage his neck and blue locks (haha pun intended ( ͡ ° ͜ʖ ͡ °) )

Loves laying on your thighs obviously 😌 loves anything with your thighs tbh

His ideal date is probably going to see a movie or just walking around wherever and getting dinner 🙃

He will literally do whatever you want — so just tell him whatchu wanna do and he’ll be on board!!

Really appreciates it when you come to his games <33 it makes him feel so loved and valued <33

also feeds his ego 💀 in his mind he’s like ‘haha yeah, my gf came to my game, these losers don’t even have a gf 😌’

super cheesy btw- but it’s like the best kind of cheesy

Brings you pretty roses :) and likes to buy you keychains whenever he finds one he thinks you’ll like

love any gift you wanna give him, but really melts at the heartfelt ones

help I really yapped on this one 😭

anywho I think you guys would be real cute :)

I ship fr fr😽

hope you like it! 😭💗

(also did see your inbox question but by the time I got it I was literally done with the HCs 😭😭 …. HOPE YOU STILL LIKE IT??)

runner ups!

Kuroo Tetsuro

Karasu Tabito

Bokuto Kotaro (HEAR ME OUT..)

[sneezeywheeze]

Arcana headcannon shit

(Because that’s what this account is gonna be ong)

~~ Headcannons for: the m6 with a gender-fluid partner

🔮Asra🔮

- understands this part of you better than anyone

- their own gender is pretty fluid, so they get it

- probably feel when you’re leaning one way through heart connection, so may adjust pronouns to that if you want

- absolutely chaotic with pet names to affirm you

- “yes, pumpkin bread?”

- “of course, my ethereal”

- absolutely chaotic with pet names

- “long time, no see, my eldritch tome”

- “did you eat today, my horrifyingly phantasmal amalgamation?”

- will help you with illusion magic to change how you wish to present, based on how you’re feeling

⚙️Nadia⚙️

- has the most fun with the challenge of dressing you based on how you’re feeling

- “you’d look most dashingly beautiful in a suit at the next ball- ah, or, I imagine we could send for a dress that masculinizes you quite nicely. Would you like that, dear?”

- loves the confusion on peoples’ faces when she introduces you as her wife to someone who knew you as her husband, or vice versa

- would find a nice neutral title for you to take as the spouse of the countess, perhaps settling on simply court mage if you’d like to take it on.

- would definitely invent something to help you present how you wish to in the moment- something like a binder that turns into a corset with the pull of a ribbon, or a suit that can turn into a dress with a simple twirl

- if you have a pronoun preference for a day, she will do her best to ensure the whole palace (and then some) know of it to ensure utmost comfort, even if you don’t mind someone using a pronoun that you might not use that day (you’d need to assure her that it is not necessary to make such widespread news)

🗡️Julian🗡️

- calls you his bisexual dream

- you mean he gets to woo a beautiful maiden AND fall into the arms of a dashing savior AND they’re the same person AND they’re his love (you)????

- oh gods he is in heaven

- cannot figure out what to call you for the life of him. He already struggled with relationship titles, but now there’s another layer

- “Aha! I’d love for you to meet my, uhm… my (y/n).”

- “Has anyone seen my.. uh.. companion?”

- eventually gets the hang of it, leaning into the poetic aspect such a challenge provides

- “ah! There’s my divine soulmate. I’ve missed you, dear.”

- finds out he’s a little fluid with his gender with your help (drag. He does drag. He loves it.)

🌿Muriel🌿

- Words are hard.

- same problem as Julian, but since he’s shyer about labeling himself publicly (not shy about being your lover, of course, he’s just not the type to scream his affections to the whole world) he tends to just refer to you by your name

- stutters when someone asks what your relationship with him is

- “They’re my… uh.. we’re.. uhm.. l-lovers.”

- since societal expectations for gender don’t mean shit to him, he thinks nothing of when you explain it to him.

-literally does not understand why this would be a tough concept to anyone

- doesn’t understand why your switching gender changes things about your day (like how you dress), but supports you nonetheless.

- tries his best to affirm you on the topic

- “your hair looks.. uh.. man-ish like that. It’s… nice..”

🐈Portia🐈

- very fluid in her gender presentation !

- loves watching people try and figure out if you’re a wlw, mlm; or straight couple when you’re out together

- way too cheesy and sweet about it

- “well, you’re my everything, so of course you have to be every gender too.”

- makes jokes (never at your expense) and thinks she’s funny (she is and isn’t)

- “do you think if we put you in a block of ice you’d become a gender solid?”

- “ I saw the prettiest man, the handsomest woman, and a non-binary delight the other day- oh, look, there’s (MC) now!”

- loves doing your makeup to help with your presentation

- always tries to get a little gender-fucky with it tho

- “okay I know you’re wearing a dress and going for a feminine look, but wouldn’t it be so so cute if we have you a mascara mustache?”

👑Lucio👑

- gets it the least of everyone ngl

- “so.. You’re a man who likes to be a woman sometimes? Oh! Like a drag Queen!”

- “ what do you mean you don’t wanna wear matching outfits? Clothes don’t have gender, babe.”

- supportive in a way where he’s sometimes (most times) a little stupid

- would love to do your makeup as well, but would not grasp the concept of gendered makeup well

- “okay hold still I’m gonna do your eyeliner- a small wing?? It’s makeup, MC! It’s meant to be showy! Ugh, fine.”

- however, will verbally berate someone if they get your pronouns wrong for how you’re feeling, despite being told it’s not a big deal

~~~

If you liked these, feel free to suggest more HC’s!!

[elainsgirl]

thank you for always being reasonable.

why are we even discussing whether elain is next? We know she is. Sjm said she knows who the first two spinoff are about, but is choosing between different potential pairings after that. We know she has researched for elains book. So we know elains book is next even without reading the books. And reading the books is so clear. Elain is coming next. And she has chosen Azriel, who is feral over her. It

This fandom is so strange sometimes. Arguing for four years over what is already clear. I've been in this fandom for years, although becoming increasingly disillusioned. I'm tired of being called insane, delusional and anything under the sun for simply reading books as they are and seeing what every other casual reader sees, and minding my own business. I'm leaving now, until we get an announcement. Just like countless others non-confrontational users have left over the years. I can't stand the constant arguing over nothing even though I try to stay out of it and filter it out. It will have been for nothing when elains book is eventually announced. Which has been obvious for four years.

What are your thoughts of all this?

Hey anon 🫶

Thank you sm for the kind words 💕

For antis’ ships to work, as you know, Gwynriel has to happen before Elucien hence Elains book has to come last & Azriels first. Their ships dont logically work otherwise and they know this. The whole reason there’s a debate on whether or not Elains book is next - is due to individuals quite literally being in denial/delusional - hoping through some miracle Sjm will decide to write about Azriel and a new character we have just met instead of the Elain book she had planned and researched well in advance. Apparently Gwyn showing up in a *few* pages of a bonus = her pov next despite the fact - even by using their own flawed logic, Elain appeared in 2 bonuses. One talked about her future arc, the other left her and Az on a cliffhanger which was the same technique used for Nessian/Feysand.

Even eluciens’ know there is no way Lucien is getting his pov in the next book. So if elains book is confirmed to be next - that is the end of elucien. Hence why they go red explaining how her book has to be last despite that contradicting so much of what Sjm has said and confirmed. As for gwynriel, they’re just delusional. When an author has literally stated she left clues for Elains book within the last book yet you are still insisting that Az will share a book with Gwyn - it speaks for itself.

I think these past 4 years have really shown how how far people would go to convince themselves something they hate isn’t happening. It would make a good psychology study tbh - who knows, someone may do it in the future. I think this new wave of antis that have recently joined the fandom: 1) don’t have fandom etiquette 2) have no sense of logically creating an arguement for their ship - that side has genuinely decreased in being logical and making sense. As far as nowadays, they’re just denying canon and lying about the books/interviews. You can’t argue with these types of people’ and they don’t want you to argue with them. Either agree with their baseless takes or get called stupid for disproving them before they block you.

Honestly- I understand the frustration so much, because you’re arguing with something thats so in the face obvious, clear and logical. Ong, its as simple as 2 + 2 = 4 - but then an oddball comes around and says no, Its 5 and you’re just left dumbfounded at how someone can be so confident in being wrong. That is what the acotar fandom feels like. It doesn’t help that Elain/Elriel have always been unpopular therefore have always been hated. As you, I have also been in the fandom for years. I’ve literally grown up and spent teen years in this fandom and year by year, it becomes less enjoyable and more frustrating. I love taking breaks every now and then because you honestly do need to step back from time to time - it helps so much especially if you start getting into other less toxic fandoms.

wise choice anon on leaving the fandom. If thats what you need, then you do you. You’re right, there is literally no point in arguing anymore. Everything has been said and done. Its not like antis are coming up with new and interesting takes to debunk either. This year, I feel like the fandom has been half-dead. Most people have moved on to better things as they should. Sarah isn’t announcing anything anytime soon. For me personally, im going to ride out these last 5 months. Im giving it until May for Mass to announce something about acotar 5. Idc if she only announces who the next book is about. I just need something from her. Whilst I will be deeply satisfied when proven right - in the end, majority of the people will still read an elain/elriel book. So it really does not matter & isn’t that deep.

My general thoughts are - we are going to see a LOT more BS takes from gwynriels & eluciens as they scramble about trying to prove their ship is happening - as time comes closer, I think we will have a lot of antis coming out and saying they don’t care anymore on who the next book is about whilst others that are more deep into the Ga/El side are still going to deny elriel happening. Take breaks and loosely be part of the fandom - we are not getting anything until spring time. There is no point - literally 0 - getting into petty arguements with the other side. Keep your peace, use the block and not interested button as much as you can. Join another fandom - there are so many authors out there who treat their fandoms better then Sjm & her team has treated the acotar fandom.

My blog will always be open to anyone that wants to vent/rant share thoughts or discuss on theories/arguements for and against elriel 🌸

Its just these last few months. It’ll fly by quickly. Hopefully.

[stannienight]

Hi, I hope you are well 💗

I was wondering if you could do Saiki K x reader, where reader and Saiki are best friends (and he secretly has a crush on them) and reader just got out of a bad relationship and thinks nobody will ever love them again, so Saiki tries to help them feel better and hint that he likes them ?

☮️&❤️

let me tell you, i love this ask sm. it has so much potential. for now i just spewed out whatever i could but this is such a lovely trope, especially for someone like saiki

❤

saiki k x best friend reader (after your breakup)

- okay listen. saiki is bad at being subtle. especially when you're so oblivious. it just leads to So Much Chaos

- the fact that you just got out of a relationship makes it hard to pick up hints okay - anyways, saiki isn't focused on getting you to like him or anything. his "hints" just happen to slip out - but it's not just that, right? you're also best friends. SARCASTIC best friends. combine that with your self-deprecation and saiki's inability to handle romance and there's a disaster waiting to happen - you: ugh what if no one ever loves me for who i am? saiki: am i a joke to you? you: yeah saiki: fair enough - you: i hate my ex. i'm going to devote myself to making him regret this saiki: didn't you waste enough time in the relationship? you, now woke: holy shit you're right - you: saiki help me glow up saiki: there is literally nothing i can improve you: IS THAT A DISS? saiki: - he helps you through the breakup, too. in true best-friend fashion, when you call him in the middle of the night with the news, he's in your room within a second. he brings ice cream, a blanket, and for some reason, a cat. you don't even know where he got it from. but you needed it - for the next few days he buys you gifts (which you keep telling him you don't need) but he wants to remind you that even he can do the job of being a boyfriend better than your ex - all your mutual friends are like, how oblivious can she get? and since when is saiki so bold? - saiki has no idea this is a romantic thing to do. "i'm just proving anyone can be better than he was wdym it's just a statistical thing?" - your friends find this whole dynamic hilarious- chiyo especially, the romance fanatic, who has never seen saiki exhibit any emotion - every time you spend time with saiki, kaidou and aren pointedly leave you two alone (dragging a nendo as oblivious as you along with them) whispering and giggling. you're so confused but not complaining - honestly, half the school already thinks you're dating? everyone except the two of you has just accepted it as a fact that you're a thing - dude: so saiki, how's your girlfriend saiki: what girlfriend dude: y/n? saiki: she's not my girlfriend dude: oh really? then maybe i can try confessing to her- saiki: dude: why am i in florida? - yeah okay he's just the tiniest bit possessive since the breakup okay? he doesn't want you getting hurt again - and don't worry he brought the guy back from florida ❤ i had so much fun writing this ong i canNOT imagine saiki being subtle at all or even understanding the line between close friendship and romance. it's all so objective to him and my guy's probably so confused send me asks for hcs, oneshots, or anything in general, even if it’s unrelated to anime or writing! saiki k and haikyu for requests but maybe go through my profile before requesting for haikyu <3

[messrsrarchives]

🤍: Which character is not as morally bad as everyone else seems to think? (would love to hear your thoughts)

ask game

oh we knowwww what i'm about to say. we know i'm about to put on my snape hat right now. we know how i feel about severus, i'm a broken record at this point.

"we need more complex characte-" YOU CAN'T EVEN HANDLE SNAPE 😖😖

and like yes !! he's an ass. he bullies children, he's neville's boggart (though i do actually fw the idea that that's less snape, more figures of authority and not wanting to be inferior? wanting to prove his worth and make his parents proud but snape is a very strict teacher that makes him doubt that but i digress) like yes !! he's an ass but that's the POINT.

i love that he deflects and is still not perfect. it would have been boring for him to deflect and be perfect. the whole point of his character is to show that you can never truly tell what side someone is on just by how they act.

he's instrumental to the war, he risks his life every day by being a double agent, he plays his part so fucking well and i just love him. i stand by my cancelled wife she did all of it but i stand by her. and the theory that he hadn't killed anyone else? "what about mine?" what about HIS soul? what about HIS sould that is still yet to be changed if he kills albus? what about his soul that is still yet untarnished by the killing curse? what about HIS. the idea that dumbledore is his first kill is everything to me.

i've yapped about him so much but ugh. like ofc he joins them??? not to forgive him or anything but OF COURSE. he's abused by a muggle and his magical mum "does nothing" (she's abused too but he's a child ofc he thinks this way), he's told he belongs in slytherin when besides lily he's never had a sense of belonging before, and then he's fed this rhetoric that muggles infiltrate their society and ruin it and he's thinking of his mum standing by and UGH. ofc he does 😖

and a lot of his actions? like yes he's an ass but ong he's living a double life. and whilst i don't think that excuses anything, i can grant him a bit of understanding when it comes to how harsh he is. he's crafted this persona for years, he can't let it crack at hogwarts. he can't risk it. he has no reason to really now that lily's gone, the one person whose opinion he valued. he'd be a shite spy if he was nice to everyone then rocked up the DE meetings, he physically can't change whether that's because of a lack of motivation to or because of his role

he's an ass but he's not evil. he's the epitome of a morally grey character and i do not trust snaters with anything. free my man from the narrative. and also fanon regulus is just snape in a pretty package SORRYYYY

which actually,,, makes sense. because we see the bad things snape does but we don't see the bad things regulus does. so it makes sense that we're more willing to delve into regulus and grant him forgiveness but 😖 my mans 😖

[aphrodieties]

Tw: mental health issues, mentions of abuse, war

Hi, how to manifest with extremely hard circumstances that prevent me from forming long term decisions?

Every single day something bad happens. It's tiring and it's eating my soul away. I am literally crying right now because I when I was writing this ask, the tumblr ask page refreshed and I lost everything that I wrote, and I put my fucking heart asking for advice from someone who I trust, only to be disappointed. I fucking hate technology.

It's something small, but that's just my life, at this point I'm just hyper sensitive, my bed is extremely uncomfortable, I lost $100 today, my family sucks and is abusive, my body feels like it's rotting because of chronic pain and probably something else, but I don't have access to health care, so who knows? Im not allowed to sllep for ong healthy periods of time, so my mind is a painful mess. My clothes are too tight, I probably have psychosis and the world is in completely chaos, specially in my country because there's a revolution because our election was rigged.

90% of my awake hours are depressing, spent miserably like a slave to my "family". So how to identify with a state that it's the complete opposite? I can't even be on a truly desired state for more than a few seconds, then it's back to this world, and manifesting to be mentally healthy feel like I'm sisyphus.

I'm also trying to manifest a genuinely good kind world with no war, bigotry, poverty and abuse. But since I'm have been a direct victim from those things, it feels so hard.

I know it's possible, but do you think those few seconds of fulfillment in the 4d are enough and more important that everything that I've been living through? Perhaps it is?

I’m so sorry you’re going through such a painful time. You’re carrying so much, and it’s completely understandable to feel overwhelmed by your circumstances. What you’re experiencing is not a reflection of your worth or potential—it’s just a state, and states can change, even when it feels impossible. Let’s focus on how to navigate this in a way that doesn’t overwhelm you further. First, recognize that you don’t need to force yourself into long-term decisions or perfect states of being right now. The few seconds of fulfillment you’re able to access in your imagination are enough because they represent a shift, however small, toward your desired reality. Even a flicker of imagining something better holds immense power, especially when things feel darkest. When you feel crushed by the 3D, try to simplify the process. Don’t pressure yourself to maintain the feeling of the wish fulfilled for long stretches—just visit it when you can. For example, as you lay in bed, imagine yourself resting in total comfort, wrapped in peace. Even if it’s just a fleeting image, allow yourself to savor it. Don’t worry if you can’t sustain it. Each moment in the 4D plants a seed, and seeds grow even when you’re not watching. As for the chaotic circumstances around you—your family, your country, your body—remember Neville’s teaching that there is nothing to change but self. This doesn’t mean blaming yourself for your circumstances but realizing your power to shift inward, no matter how small the step. When the external world feels overwhelming, retreat inward and remind yourself that the 4D is your sanctuary. You can build safety, health, and love there, even if the 3D looks the opposite. Finally, be kind to yourself. You’re not failing, and you don’t need to do this perfectly. Even with everything you’re going through, your few moments of imagining peace, health, and love are heroic acts of creation. Trust that they matter. Trust that they’re enough. And trust that even if your faith feels small, the power within you is limitless. Keep going, even if it’s one tiny moment at a time.

[ceedaryaps]

Fourth Wing yap sesh pt1

!:Don't hate me guys lol it took forever to get back to posting but I swear I've been reading. I've finished fourth wing AND iron flame and i decided i was gonna do two parts in my reviews from now on 1 will be my thoughts on the characters. 2 will be my thoughts on the plot so these yap sessions are gonna have two parts per book.

So without further adoo here are my opinions on the fourth wing characters.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Violet Sorrengail

I genuinely think Violet is so funny but not in a " she has good jokes" but more of a "damn she's kinda real". Promising to stay away from Xaden went out the window QUICK. First glance and homegirl was hungry I respect it. Giving Rhiannon her shoe without even hesitating just shows you what kina person Violet is she rides for her friends fr and she barely KNEW Rhiannon. People doubted her sooo much (looking at you dain) but they would always compliment how smart she was but their compliments never really extended to how she applied her mind to doing stuff. I mean who would even think to come up with that way of clearing the gauntlet. She dosent let anything stop her and I got mad respect for it.

Xaden Riorson

Don't jump me guys please....sometimes he gives me the ick. Don't get me wrong he's cool but i feel like he's very...cut and paste in my opinion. He just reminds me of a less emotionally available Rhysand. Even the looks are the same. BUT, i respect his character, Xaden is still young but took over the responsibilities of every marked child, every last one. He loves his folks real bad and I fw it.

Rhiannon Matthaias

Queen. That's it honestly. Bad Bitch. Cuntress. What else do I say. Rhiannon was the first to witness Violets vulnerability and didn't say SHIT. Any time Violet needed cover Rhiannon got her. You fw Violet? Rhiannon is on your ass. And she kicks ass like what more can we want. I defiantly knew she was leader material the more scenes I read of her, this is a Rhiannon stan account.

Dain Aetos

Brother eugghhhhhhhhhhhhh. It's always the first love interest that ends up being the ick. And I know I said Xaden gives me the ick but Dain Aetos? Yucky. I truly cant stand that no matter how many times Violet succeeds with flying colors he still believes she cant make her own decisions, having conversations to move her elsewhere not on her behalf pisses me off, and he's so possessive for what, I understand the whole childhood friends thing but its weird and I don't like it. Also the millisecond we knew what his signet was I just knew he was gonna peep into her thoughts from the jump. And then after Violet nearly got murdered in her sleep he REFUSED to believe that it was Amber who let them in. You're telling me an alleged fling meant more to him than his childhood friend getting killed in the night. Dpmo.

Liam Mairi

The best to do it fr fr. At first he was just assigned to violet as a favor for xaden but after a while violet was his buddy, I also feel like he assisted in bridging the social gap between the marked ones and the rest of the cadets. He will be missed.

Mira Sorrengail

Typical older sister tbh, I dont have any overwhelming thoughts of her, kudos for going toe to toe with their mom about Violet joining the war college.

Jack Barlowe

Definition of a crash out, is responsible for a good portion of the cadets deaths in the first year and that blows my mind bc........for what purpose. Like what does this do for you. And going after Andarna????? What business is it of yours if she had decided to bond with someone why kill her? And why did he think the dragons would just LET them kill her. Tairn should have cooked him in that moment ong. Baide weird as hell for bonding with a mf willing to kill a baby dragon for no reason.

Imogen Cardulo

She gives me the vibes that she can talk some major shit, ik she gotta be a notorious shit talker and one who can back it up too.

Lilith Sorrengail

I don't like her. Girl your son died, your husband died, you eldest daughter could get cooked at any moment and you're so eager to send your youngest too? For what reason? "All my children are riders" well one is dead allegedly, the other ones squad keeps getting attacked and you knew damn well violet would be a target. Otherwise i feel like she's a boy mom.

Andarna

Sweet baby love her

Tairn

Tairn is so funny, "You're bleeding stop it" LMFAO?! Truly one of my favs tbh

Ridoc Gamlyn

Everyone says Xaden this Xaden that, I'm in love with Ridoc. He's funny but not the annoying funny, trying to keep things lighthearted for the group so they don't get depressed. Cracking jokes after an asshole got torched Infront of you is one way to calm your friends down lmfaoo. Bi icon

Edit: To add Brennan

Brennan Sorrengail

Bitch where tf have YOU been?!

Now other than these characters there are not a lot of characters that I find too much of an interest in nor do I have many comprehensive thought's about them so that's all for the Fourth Wing Review part 1!

[nentofus]

okay to like / reblog / tag / save / whatever!

thought i should pop my personal prompt list for this year's OC-tober here! for ease of reading, the prompt list is as follows:

The Introduction Week 1. Newest OC 2. Your favourite OC 3. OC who gets the most love 4. OC who needs a little more love 5. Show some Pride 🏳️‍🌈 6. Your favourite ship (romantic, platonic, found family, any relationship!) 7. Draw over an IRL picture - Alternate option: OC you'd most want to meet IRL

Appearance Week 8. Extra appendages (like extra limbs, eyes, etc.) 9. New hairstyle / New outfit 10. Gloves or socks? 11. Swimsuit 12. Mascot costume / Cursed outfit 13. Crossdressing 14. Wearing something from your culture!

Aesthetics Week 15. Cyberpunk - Alternate option: Vapourwave 16. Cottagecore - Alternate option: Lolita 17. Galaxy - Alternate option: Ocean / Forest 18. Monochrome / Noir - Alternate option: Light academia / Dark academia 19. Neon / Eyestrain - Alternate option: 2000s scene kid / Hot Topic emo 20. Rockabilly / 50s - Alternate option: Ah Beng / Ah Lian (lol) 21. Your favourite aesthetic - Alternate option: Your least favourite aesthetic

Fun Week 22. Song redraw 23. Collab cafe item 24. Limited palette 25. Family Feud 26. Idol / Band subunit 27. Fake screenshot 28. Barbenheimer

The End Half-Week 29. Your OC with a canon character 30. Your comfort zone / comfort character 31. Halloween costume dressup - Alternate option: Guts & glory / Free day!

I'll be putting the explanations for a couple of these under a read-more so that those who aren't interested can skip the rest of my blathering! Feel free to ask questions if y'all like! My ask box + the replies on this post are always open :D

---

General - I wanted to make another self-indulgent prompt list this year for OC-tober so I did :3 - If you do feel like following along, remember that your health, comfort and motivation come first! Do as much as you want or as little as you want, or feel free to mix up the order or skip the prompts you don't like! - The alternate options were added because 1. I'm indecisive and 2. If a certain prompt doesn't appeal to you, then there's another choice! - I always have OCs on the brain so if you want to mention/tag me in your posts please do! I'll be responding under my main blog @complementary-oxymorons due to the interaction limitations of side blogs + wanting to keep my art blog as my personal art archive.

About the prompts - I understand that some prompts can be a bit confusing so I'll try to preemptively explain some! - Day 7: Draw over an IRL picture - For some ideas, it could be like drawing your OCs on a picture of a beach as if they're there having fun! Or maybe you could draw little chibis of your OCs sitting on your shoulder / messing with your hand while you draw :D (please do be mindful about the risks that come with uploading IRL photos though!). If you're concerned about privacy but still want to involve your "IRL self" in the piece, a possibility is to fully re-draw / trace over the reference photo you took! - Day 10: Gloves or socks - Yeah this is just me finding an excuse to draw my OCs who wear gloves or draw them in some super cute socks / stockings. Which team are you on? - Day 20 alternate: Ah Beng / Ah Lian - I thought it'd be funny because someone put it on Aesthetics Wiki (link). To those who have ah beng in ur neighbourhood just put portable speaker escooter tattoo slipper can liao also if yall know the typical ah beng spotify songs can tell me pls ok xiexie i only know 小幸运 and heng ong huat - Day 22: Song redraw - Some ideas could be redrawing your OCs on album art, or adapting them into the visuals of a song as if they're covering it! (Like how vtubers do hehe) - Day 23: Collab cafe item - Create a food or drink item that represents your OC! Some IPs (anime, games, etc.) collaborate with IRL cafes to create a themed menu which runs for a limited time only. The items on the menu tend to be references to the IP and its characters (e.g. an orange-haired character in the game gets a menu item that's an orange soda with decorative sprinkles, or a character who loves curry gets a menu item that's a special curry dish, something like that). If you're still unsure, google stuff like "collab cafe"! - Day 25: Family Feud - Feel free to redraw your favourite Family Feud clip as your OCs because there are a lot of strong contenders kekdog - Day 28: Barbenheimer - Exactly what it is! Feel free to draw your OCs dressing up to go to either movie or something. - Day 31 alternate: Guts & glory - This one's for those who prefer a more bloody Halloween :D Feel free to gore it up in any way you like. Plush, candy, flower, extra visceral... get those guts some air!!!

[lostfirefly]

Life Must Have It's Mysteries (Ch.7)

Nobody asked me, but the thought of sending my beloved couple on a new journey didn't let me go. Pain continues leading me to art :)

English is not my native language, errors may occur. As always, feel free to share your thoughts :) Masterlist is here.

Description: Buggy and Catherine (OC from my “You’ve Got the Same Dream as Me” series) continue searching for parts of the scepter.

Warnings: Fun, fluff, arguing, sadness, adventure, Buggy's inappropriate jokes, swearing (as always). Shitty shit again:)

Words: 8928 (sorry, this chapter is lo-o-ong, but it was impossible to split it :) Pour some tea and make yourself comfortable ^_^)

Taglist: @gingernut1314, @operationroots, @hey-august, @rorywritesjunk, @yujo-nishimura (I hope you still like it!)

The title is taken from “Life Must Have It's Mysteries” by Hans Zimmer (OST Inferno).

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Smack. Smack. Smack.

“Cotton candy, please stop. My head hurts.” Buggy rested his forehead on the table. 

“Someone got too overjoyed yesterday and drank a lot, right? Should I order one more cup of coffee for you, my little bear?” Catherine straightened his ponytail and began stroking his back. 

They were sitting in a roadside cafe early in the morning. 

“I don't remember the drinks, but I remember what you did to me last night, bad, bad girl. You left me powerless, Catherine Mitchell.” Buggy lifted his head from the table and placed it on Catherine's shoulder. She immediately hugged him. 

She blushed. “I don’t understand how this happened. It was your fault.” 

“My fault?” He turned his head towards her and raised his eyebrows. “I’m wildly sorry, but it was you who asked for more and more, and please note that most of the time you were on top of me. And by the way. I wasn't the one who asked..” He started imitating her voice. “Listen, Buggy, are all your parts separated? I never asked you about that. What if you tried to detach your di~~”

Catherine kicked him with her foot.

“Ouch! For what?” 

“I hate you.” She reddened. 

“Yes! First “I hate you” for today.” Buggy snapped his fingers. “Oh, cotton candy, just admit that I’m like an amusement park to you. And the whole atmosphere is turning you on. And you love when I fuc~~” 

She pinched his arm. “Shhh, clown! Not here! We're in a decent place!” 

“Ouch! But I don't want to be silent! Let everyone in this fucking place know what I was doing to you. It was so good. Why should I remain silent?”

“It's called manners, Buggy.” Catherine exclaimed indignantly in a whisper. “People do not discuss intimate life in society. We talked about this too. Remember?” 

“Aw, come on. Where's the fun in that?” He settled under her armpit. “You know, Cathhie-pie, besides our hot nights, do you know what I love most? When... you... you know… you hug me. After sex or when I have breakfast, or when we sit on the couch together, doesn't matter. I lo... I love it so much when you hug me. I don’t feel lonely at times like this. I feel... you know... needed and safe. I want you... you know… to stay with me forever. Will you stay with me? I’ll be happy to be in your arms every day.” Buggy mumbled, closing his eyes. 

“Oh, looks like someone hasn't gotten over his beer yet. I love you too, my Buggy Bear. But you're still in the hangover stage if you're saying that to me aloud.” Catherine called the waitress with her fingers and motioned for two more cups of coffee and pancakes. “I ordered an extra cup of coffee for you and pancakes. You’ll be fine in ten minutes.”  She kissed the top of his head. 

“You always know what I need, my cotton candy. How do you do it?”

“Oh my god, do I have to answer this question?” Catherine laughed and stroked his head. “I don't know. Our relationship is new, but I know you better now. And even though you annoy me sometimes, I’m sure you deserve to be taken care of.”

He exhaled. “You seem like a smart girl, you went to university, read good books and met nice guys, but you got involved in a relationship with some lowlife man.”

“A smart girl knows who she's messing with. And don't say those terrible things about yourself. My heart aches for you. Honestly, I would kill whoever put that shit into your head.” The waitress came to the table and placed the order. “Your coffee and pancakes, my blue-haired jerk.” 

Buggy opened his eyes, sighed and sat up straight. He took a sip of coffee and stuck his fork into a large portion of pancakes. 

“Tasty?” Catherine stroked his head as he munched his breakfast. 

“Yeah. But your pancakes taste a million times better.” He said with a mouth full.

“Chew first, idiot.” Catherine moved her hand to his back and started stroking it. “I’ll make you the biggest portion when we get home.” She kissed him on the cheek. “God, you're so cute. I love you.”

Buggy swallowed the food and blushed. “Aren't you tired of repeating this yet?”

“Nope.” Smack. “You know, if you were a pirate, I could say that you just stole my heart. That's why it's hard for me to control myself sometimes. And that's why I love you so much.” Smack. Smack. “You’re not just the king of my heart, but.. oh, oh! I know! You could be the king of pirates!”

Buggy tensed and became a little anxious. “You're talking about piracy again. Stop telling this shit.” He cut a big piece of pancake with a fork and put it in his mouth. 

“I was joking, why are you so mad?” 

“I’m not mad.” He said with a mouth full. 

“Okay.” She removed her hand from his back. “By the way, while you were sleeping, I leafed through the notes a little and looked at the map. Next we need to move in this direction. But judging by the map, there will be no motels there, and we will have to spend the night in the open air. And on the second part of the scepter there are also some inscriptions. I don't understand their meaning yet, but we'll figure it out. In any case, we need to drive here for three or four hours. I can drive, if you want to rest.” 

“No, I'm fine. Well, I’m done with pancakes.” Buggy put his cap on his head and clapped his hands together. “I'll go fill up the tank. Order me one coffee to go. I'll be right back.”

“Okay.” Catherine kissed him on the cheek, in an attempt to defuse the situation, he silently got up from the table and went outside. Catherine ordered two more large coffees and asked for the bill. The waitress returned a couple of minutes later, and put the check on the table. 

“Five. Seven. Ten. Damn. I'm out of cash.” Catherine checked all the pockets. “Oh, wait!” She saw that Buggy had left his jeans jacket and reached into the inside pocket. “He left it again.” She opened his wallet and took out the required amount of money, 

“25 dollars. That's it now.” The waitress smiled, took the money and left. Catherine noticed her photo in his wallet and decided to take it out to look. “What I didn't expect was to see my photo here. You surprise me, Buggy the Clown. What is this?”

There was one other picture. 

“Fuck, I forgot my wallet. W-What are you doing?” Buggy stared at her.  

“What?” 

“Why are you rummaging through my things?” He pointed at her with his hand. 

“I'm not. The waitress came up with the bill, I didn’t have enough cash, I saw that you forgot your jacket and wallet again, and took money to pay the bill. Then I saw my photo and I wanted to take a closer look. By the way, I’m surprised to see me here. But can you tell me...” She was holding in her hands a photo where he was in prison clothes. “Is this your photo from prison? Why do you keep it?”

“Give it to me!” Buggy snatched the wallet and photographs from her hands. “I asked you not to touch my things.”

“I didn’t do it on purpose. Why are you so angry?!” 

“I’m not angry.” He grabbed his jeans jacket and went out. 

“Hey! Wait!” Catherine jumped up, threw her bag over her shoulder and ran after him. She caught up with him on the street. “Hey, you, clown! Stop! What's wrong again? What did I say?” 

“Nothing.” Buggy muttered, leaning on the car. 

“So if I didn't say anything, why are you freaking out?”

“I’m not! Why do you always do this, Catherine?” He hissed through his teeth. “You search and sniff out something. I re-hid everything, and then you found it again. Do you do it on purpose?” 

“Score, Buggy!” She showed her thumb. “You're a master of communication. I'm glad you're scared of me enough that you hide your things.” Catherine opened the car door, grabbed her sweatshirt, and walked toward the café. 

“Where are you going?” 

“Home!” She barked. 

“Are you crazy? We're in the middle of the desert! Come back!” 

“Fuck you! I'll catch the first car I come across and go home. I don't care who will be driving a fishman, a cyborg, or some rubber boy.”

Catherine took a few steps forward and felt his hand grab her bag. “Let me go, Buggy!” The hand pulled her back. “I said, let me go!” She threw back his hand and took three more steps forward. 

She stopped, turned around and looked at him. Buggy looked confused. “Seriously, clown?” Catherine clasped her hands. “Is that all? All you can do to stop me is use your chop chop thing?” 

“What do you expect? So I'd run after you, and the desert wind would ruffle my hair.” Buggy attached his hand back and crossed his arms. 

“It would be nice.” Catherine laughed and took a step forward. “I'm sorry I took your things.” Step. 

“I'm also sorry that you took my things.” He took a step towards her too. 

“Ass.” Step. “I don't want you to be afraid of me.” Step. 

“I just…” Step.

“And if you're worried that I found this fucking prison photo, then I'll surprise you.” Step. 

“How?” Step. 

“Hello, I’m sure we know each other. I’m your girlfriend - Catherine Mitchell, and I don't care.” Step. 

Catherine looked at his surprised face, tiptoed closer, and buried her head in his chest. She took his hand with one hand, hugged his back with the other, and began stroking his palm with her finger. “I’m not stupid, Buggy. I know that you’re hiding something from me. Well, you were in prison, so what. I don't give a shit. I'm sure you're not some kind of maniac. Maybe you stole geese.” She laughed. “When you’ll be ready to talk about your past, then we’ll talk, okay? We discussed it, remember? You can tell me anything you want, only when you’re ready.” 

“Fine.” Buggy hugged her. 

“So, you're not angry at me anymore? Are we okay?” She snuggled closer to him.

“Yeah.” He kissed the top of her head. “I forgot to say, cotton candy, I like your braid you're wearing today.”

“Thanks! We look alike today, right? By the way, you are very hot in that photo. And you keep me in your wallet.” Catherine raised her head and looked into his eyes. “That means I take a special spot in your heart, right?” 

“Please don't make me say the obvious, little shit.” He stroked her cheek. “Better tell me, where are we going?” 

⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭

“Judging by your reaction, we are near something interesting.” Buggy looked at Catherine, who was squealing again as she sat on the ground. 

“I'm going crazy now!” She clenched her fists, closed her eyes and started kicking her legs. 

“Just now?” 

“Don't mock me, clown! Do you know what this is?” Catherine pointed at the pyramid with white outer casing stone at the very top. 

“Why do you ask all the time if you know the answer? Cathie-pie, everything is simple with us. You tell me where to go, I will take you there. And where I’m taking you, to be honest, I barely understand.” Buggy scratched his cheek. 

“This's the Pyramid of Khafre!!” She pulled his hand and he plopped down next to her.

“Geeez, woman!” He snatched his severed hand from her hands. “Pull more carefully! And I have no idea who this Kha-what-is-his-name is.”

“Khafre was the son of Cheops.” Catherine grabbed Buggy by the shoulder and started shaking him

“Whose son?” He glanced at her with a surprise look. 

“Oh, god! I live with an idiot! Cheops was one of the famous kings.” Catherine rolled her eyes. “And this's the second-tallest pyramid in the world. You live here, how can you not know this?”

“Cotton candy, dead dudes buried under a ton of sand don't interest me until I know they can make me rich.” 

“You know, this pyramid is unique in that the remains of the original cladding have been preserved in its upper part!! I can't beli-i-eve-e-e!!” Catherine fell on her back and began kicking her legs, squealing. She rolled onto her buttocks, looked at Buggy and threw herself on his neck with a squeal. “Love!” Smack. “Love!” Smack. “Love, love, love you!” Smack. Smack. Smack. “I'm so glad I can share this adventure with you!” Smack. Smack. 

“I'm glad that I can bring you so much joy, not only in bed. If you know what I mean.” Buggy giggled idiotically and hugged Catherine around her waist. 

“You're disgusting!” She sat on the ground and started stroking his hand. 

“I thought we figured out that a long time ago.” Buggy lightly snapped Catherine’s nose. “So, my Egyptian girl, where should we go?” 

“Oh, sure!” She pulled out a map and notepad from her bag and placed them on her lap. “So, let me look. To the right. To the left. You will be surprised, my blue-haired love, but we're gonna look for the burial room again.” 

“Lord, these pharaohs had no imagination.” He rolled his eyes. 

“What do you think, part of the secret scepter will lie somewhere at the entrance under your feet?” 

“It would be nice.” 

“No, everything is simple here. The pharaohs believed that after death they would become gods, so they built themselves huge tombs to place everything they needed for life in the afterlife.” Catherine ran her finger over the map. “You see? Now we will pass through the valley of the temples. But there is one problem. The only entrance that is indicated in the records is on the eastern side. And there are also a lot of tourists here, since this pyramid is part of the most popular route.” 

“Oh, if it means we can hide behind the sarcophagus again, and you'll be on top of me, then I don't mind tourists.” Buggy winked. 

Catherine looked at him, narrowing her eyes. “How did I even get in touch with you?” 

“You just couldn't resist my charm!” Buggy lay down on the sand with his hand behind his head. 

“Charm? Are you kidding me? You'd been tormenting and pissing me off for days!”

“So in the end, I was able to conquer you.” He poked Catherine in the side with his finger. 

“And I don't understand how it happened.” She looked at him and ran her hand over his ponytail. “So. Shall we go?” 

Buggy stood up and offered her his hand. Catherine kissed him on the nose, hearing another “stop it” in response, and put the papers in her bag. They took with them water, flashlights and small hatchets. They walked slowly and reached the entrance to the alley of temples. 

“Damn. We have to buy a ticket to get in. Really?” Catherine rolled her eyes.

“Huh, I've never had to buy a ticket to see someone and then rob that someone later.” Buggy scratched his head. 

Catherine took his hand and pulled him towards the cash register, trying not to attract too much attention. They bought tickets and went towards the alley of temples. 

“You didn't have to grab my ass while we were standing in line.” Catherine said as she held the tickets in her hands.

“I didn't do anything. It wasn't me. It was someone else.” Buggy shrugged his shoulders. 

“Yeah, lie more, you would have killed that someone else on the spot. Okay, now you and I will walk through the alley, and from there we will go into the pyramid. But since there are so many people here, we may have to stay longer somewhere to take a close look. I will tell you something, and you pretend that you don’t understand and want to look at something better.”

“Geeez! I don’t even need to pretend that I don’t understand.” 

They entered the territory. Catherine happily showed and told Buggy about the Sphinx, the history of the pyramid and the temples. He looked at her with admiration. They went to the valley, which was built with huge limestone stones, its walls were covered with sixteen blocks of red-pink granite. The floor of the temple was laid out of alabaster stones and the lobby was open to the sky. 

“Look, look!” Catherine tugged at Buggy's hand. “Do you see these traces near the columns? Khafre’s monuments stood here.”

“Apparently, he was everyone’s favorite, since his Egyptian people helped him build such an alley.” He looked at the walls with interest. 

“Actually no. He was a tyrant and was considered one of the bloodiest rulers. I think he was just a piece of shit. Oh, oh! See!” Catherine pointed her hand at the columns. “You see that light? This light penetrated into the temple through holes in the ceiling, and illuminated each statue. That’s so amazing. Can you believe that this is the real history of mankind? Oh, my blue-haired love, thank you so, so much for this trip.” 

Buggy hugged her and kissed the top of her head. “Always welcome.” He was glad to see her happy face, but he was afraid of saying it to her. 

“Sorry, I’m too emotional.” Catherine clapped her hands. “Okay! Let’s check where we should go next!” She took out a map and a notepad, ran her fingers over the sheets, and felt Buggy put his chin on her shoulder. 

She reached her hand and scratched his head. “Look. Inside, everything is quite simple, there are only two passages that will lead us to the tomb. We need the lower one. Also, the notes say that there we need to look for a “sign of the soul” and I don’t yet understand what it means.”

Catherine took Buggy’s hand and dragged him to the lower entrance, which began at about ground level. As they entered the short descending pass through the lower entrance, they descended until the passageway levels off. This was a way, which looked like almost a hallway, with a large empty recess in the wall on the left side. To the right, across from the recess, was a short descending passageway leading to a chamber. 

“There is no sarcophagus here. Only a pointed ceiling. And you see, there are almost no drawings on the walls at all. The decoration is quite simple. Apparently this Khafre had a bad imagination. This chamber may have served for storage of offering material or treasure.” Catherine looked carefully at the ceiling. “Wait! You see? Do you see the drawing there? Something like stars, similar to the constellation Ursa Major. To tell the truth, this is the only constellation that I can identify. It was used to designate g~. Quiet!” She fell silent abruptly when a group of tourists entered the room. 

They began to wander around the chamber and Catherine told the story of the pyramid.

“Shh, go to her. Ask her, she seems to know something.” Catherine heard a whisper behind her.

“Sorry!” Someone tapped her on the back with a finger. Catherine turned around and saw a slim young man. He wore a yellow hoodie, with black sleeves and black hood, and a northern-style fur hat.

“It seems my friend and I are a little lost.” The man pointed his finger at a man, wearing a beige overall, and a black cap with a yellow brim. “And you tell the story of the pyramid so beautifully that it seemed to me that you could help us. Oh! Where are my manners? My name is Trafalgar Law, and this is my friend Penguin.” He extended his hand.

“Catherine. Catherine Mitchell.” She extended her hand to him, which Law immediately kissed. Catherine quickly pulled her hand back. “And this’s my almost husband Buggy.” She looked at Buggy, who was turning red with jealousy.

“Nice to meet you, Catherine. We came on vacation and decided to explore the local sightseeing. But no one told me that among the old, decrepit mummies I would meet a beautiful, smart girl.” Law smiled. “Anyway. We’re looking for this room. I’ve never seen burial rooms, I really want to see them. Sounds interesting. Can you tell me where it is?” He showed the map that was handed out at the entrance to the pyramids and unfolded it in front of Catherine. 

“Yes, of course. Look. You now need to go straight along the corridor, then turn to the right, then left again, and you will come out to the sarcophagus.” 

“Thank you, beauty!” He took her hand again and kissed it. 

“Listen, Traffic Slaw or whatever your name is. Stop grabbing my hand. This is the way you need to go!” She pointed her finger towards the passage. 

Law and his friend shrugged and walked away. Catherine took Buggy's hand, the grinding of whose teeth seemed to be heard throughout Egypt, and began to run her finger over his palm. 

“Are you okay?” She asked quietly. 

“Yeah. Just another handsome man decided to flirt with you at the bottom of the pyramid. This kind of thing happens all the time.” Buggy grumbled under his breath. 

“I love it when you're jealous.” She kissed him on the cheek. 

“I’m not jealous! A shitty bastard grabbing your hands. This is absolutely normal. Big deal!” 

“Liar!” She kissed him on his cheek. “Okay! Let’s get back to our search. I showed you a drawing of a constellation. This is how the god Amset was depicted before. But I still can’t understand why he’s here. His tail points towards the same path where these guys went. But as I told you, there aren't many ways around here. So let's go, my blue-haired love.” She tiptoed, kissed him on the nose and dragged him further along the corridors.

They left the chamber and turned to the right. At the end of the passageway lies a ramp which ascends into the next hallway. They climbed the ramp, and saw the rough dressed granite lined passageway that leads back up to the higher entrance on the north side. 

“Yes! You see? This way will lead us to the main burial chamber.” Catherine whispered. She took a flashlight out of her bag, turned it on and shined it on the walls. 

“And who is this?” Buggy pointed to the drawings on the wall. “Some kind of winged dude.”

“Where?” Catherine ran up to the drawing and shone the light on it. “Oh my god! It's not a winged dude, Buggy. It's Ba! Do you know who this is?” She looked at him with a smile. 

“Cotton candy, seriously! Are you kidding me, or is this your strange way of bullying?” 

“Ba was considered a life essence and was depicted as a bird with the head of a man. Wow!” Catherine carefully moved her hand over the drawing. “Wait.. The sign of soul. It’s.. Quiet!” 

They saw the light of lanterns flashing around the bend, and soon another group of tourists appeared. Catherine started telling stories again about the drawings she had seen on the wall. The tourists stood in one place for a long time, sighing joyfully, looking at the drawings, and finally left.

Catherine began to look at the wall again. “That's why the sign of the soul. Ba is the soul of a person. Look. The wings of the bird are pointing in that direction. Towards the tomb. Wait.” She pulled out the map and notes again. “You see? This path is indicated on the map. So we are going right.” She jumped up happily and clapped her hands. 

Catherine grabbed Buggy’s hand and took him further. They reached a chamber which was long and wide. There was a black granite sarcophagus in this room, in that it was built to be sunken into the floor. The lid, which was no longer attached, lay propped up next to the coffer near the wall.

“What the fuck?” Buggy asked loudly, looking at the sarcophagus. “It’s opened!”.

“Be quiet, young man!” An old woman from a tourist group was standing nearby, muttered with displeasure and hit Buggy on the leg with her cane. “Learn some manners!” 

“You're old fu~” Buggy looked at Catherine and suddenly fell silent.

The whole scene made her laugh. “I’m sorry, mam. He's just very happy to see the sarcophagus.”

“Idiots!” The woman mumbled. 

Catherine couldn't stop laughing, Buggy looked at her dissatisfied. “Oh, I’m sorry, my silly clown. That was so funny.” She hugged him and noticed how the old woman shook her head, glancing at them.

While the group of tourists remained in the room for some time, Catherine started telling stories about myths and the pyramid again. Finally, the tourists left.

“So what now?” Buggy asked in a whisper. “This thing is open, there are no traces of this fucking pharaoh. Our journey was in vain? Are you sure that the third part of the scepter is here? Maybe this is the wrong pyramid?” 

“Don’t ramble, clown! Give me a minute.” She sat down on the sand and took out her notes. “We're definitely in the right place and the right pyramid. Wait! The drawing of Ba, according to myths, should be on the sarcophagus.” She jumped and ran to the coffin. “I’ll check the frame, you inspect the lid. Look for the bird with a human head.”

“Fuck! Every Egyptian god here has the head of a bird. How will I recognize him?!” Buggy mumbled, took another flashlight from Catherine's bag and walked over to the lid. “Damn, it's heavy!” He took it and began to carefully turn the lid. 

“You are so strong, my love!” Catherine watched as Buggy blushed. “Found anything?” “Wait! Not yet!” He moved the flashlight over the lid. “I don't see the bird, but I see something which looks like a drawing of a man with a crown on his head, and his arms raised up.”

“Where? Where?” She ran up behind him and climbed onto his back.

“Oh, I wish I could be behind you right now. If you know what I mean.” He grinned and felt Catherine slapped him on the head. “Ouch!”

“Stop thinking only about sex, Buggy! Please, focus on our case!”

“It's very hard to think about our case when you're sitting on me, cotton candy.” He laughed idiotically. “Look, this guy with his hands. Is he important?” 

Catherine leaned her head over his shoulder. “It's Ka!” She started kicking her legs. “Look, look! Here is the inscription on the lid. 

“Do I live or die, Osiris. 

I enter and reappear through you. 

I disintegrate in you. 

I grow in you. 

I am not destroyed.”

This is the prayer of the soul. You’re doing great!” She kissed him in the temple and saw him blushed again. 

She jumped off his back and began walking in circles, waving her arms. “Ba, Ka.. Ka is the life force. According to the beliefs of the ancient Egyptians, Ka lives in a statue of a person or god. Ba is the soul and consisted of the totality of a person’s feelings and emotions. But Ka remained in the burial vault.”

Buggy kept a close eye on Catherine, who paced back and forth, muttering something under her breath and had little idea what she was talking about. 

“Amset! That's why there was Amset's symbol! And that's why there's a constellation on the ceiling again!” Catherine stopped abruptly and stared at Buggy. “Amset was one of the sons of Horus, and he was responsible for preserving the soul. Do you understand?”

“Actually, not very much.” He shook his head. 

Catherine waved her hand at him and continued to wander from side to side. “Wait. We found the first half of the scepter in the pyramid, in which the gods were responsible for birth. In the second, where the gods were responsible for death. Do you understand what I'm getting at?” Catherine looked at Buggy.

“That... I don’t know. That the Egyptians had many gods.. for all occasions?” He shrugged. 

“No, idiot! This part of the scepter is responsible for life. If you put all the parts of the scepter together, they seem to reflect the life cycle, you know? Birth, life, death.”

Buggy scratched his head. “But we don't have the third part of the scepter!”

“The myths say that Amset comes to illuminate the Ka's path.” Catherine began running her hands along the walls again. “Wait. There are more drawings here. This is Sakh. This is a human body. This’s Ib - the heart. It was believed that the heart was formed at the moment of conception and the whole life was imprinted on it. Think, Catherine, think.” She walked up to Buggy, looked at him, and buried the top of her head in his chest. “I don't know. I don't understand.”

He gently placed his hands on her back. “You know everything.”

“I don't know.”

“Cathie-pie, you're the smartest girl I've ever met. Seriously! You know everything. Calm down and think.”

Catherine flopped to the ground and took down her notes again. She sat on the floor for a long time and muttered something under her breath. Buggy sat down next to her and looked at her with interest. He didn’t notice how he gently touched her hand with his fingertips while she was moving it over the paper.

“Don't distract me, Buggy.” She smiled slightly. 

“I don’t…” He abruptly removed his hand and blushed. He glanced at the wall and felt her hand run through his hair.

“No, no!” Catherine flipped through the pages. “Oh! Wait! The notes say that the sky must touch the earth in order to close the cycle of life. What does this mean?” 

“I hate Egypt.” Buggy stood up. “ Why can't they just write how easy to find anything? Why did they have to bury something somewhere and come up with stupid clues for it? It would be easier if it was like, “Hey, Buggy, here's the key to my treasure. Take it and enjoy your life!” He kicked the wall. “Crap!” 

“Did you hit it hard?” Catherine looked at him with concern.

“No, I’m fine.” He glanced at the floor. “Hey, Cathie-pie, there’s also the same pattern under your feet, similar to the one on the ceiling. Why did they do it twice?” 

“Where, where?” She jumped up and ran to him. 

“Here.” He pointed to the floor. “I don't understand your Egyptian shit, but doesn't it look like what's pictured there.” He glanced at the ceiling.

Catherine looked at the floor and ceiling. “Interesting!” She touched parts of the drawing on the floor. “These things are clicking.”

“Wow, the Egyptians are so original. Every second thing in their fucking pyramids moves or clicks.” Buggy rolled his eyes and said sarcastically.

“Sh-h-h! Wait! Amset is responsible for the soul. That is, from the earth to the sky. We just need to click the drawing on the floor to create the Ursa Major. And you see this drawing on the floor? This is a variation on the star clock. They were used for night services in temples or ritual ceremonies.”

“You know, I think you should'd been out more, cotton candy. “ Buggy exhaled sadly. 

“Screw you! Okay! The drawing is located as if the clock is one in the morning. According to myths, Amset comes to the soul at one o'clock in the morning. It's easy!” Catherine clapped her hands and squealed. 

Buggy looked at her without blinking. “Yeah, much easier.”

“See all those drawings on the wall? This is what a person has during life. Heart, shadow, soul. But the sign of the soul itself stands directly under the constellation. I'll open my notes now, I need to see what the Ursa Major looks like so that we don't confuse anything.” Catherine took out a notebook and began to compare the drawing on the floor, ceiling and in the notes. She began to show Buggy with her hand which slab should be clicked. 

“So what now?” He asked, clicking the last slab in place. 

“I don’t know.” Catherine ran her hand along the walls. 

“Maybe we assembled it wrong?” Buggy sat down on the floor.

“No, it’s impossible. Everything matches completely. But wait. What if.. The constellation doesn’t all appear at once, right? It clearly appears in pieces. What if we assembled it exactly in the order in which the brightest stars begin to appear, and then all the rest? But I have no idea how this happens. Maybe this…” She heard him begin to click the slabs. “How are you?.. What are you doing?” 

“I'm clicking this fucking thing in the order you just said.” Buggy muttered under his breath.

“But how do you know the order?” Catherine watched him with round eyes. 

“Well, let’s just say that at one point in my life it came in handy.” 

“You are full of secrets and mysteries, clown.” She watched with interest as he clicked small plates. 

“Something like that.” He dusted off his hands, sat on the floor and looked at her. “What?” 

“Nothing. You did great!” Catherine ran her hand over his head. 

“So what now?” 

“I don't know.” She ran her hand over the clock’s drawing and heard a crash. 

“What did you do?” Buggy looked at the wall. 

“I don't know.” Catherine ran her hand and pressed the sign of the soul. They watched without stopping as the hatch in the floor opened. 

“What's there?” Buggy stuck his head into the crack and narrowed his eyes. “There's something there. Stairs and some kind of black box in the center.” 

“Let me see.” Catherine sat down and lowered her head into the crack. “I'm ready to bet anything, but I'm sure there's a third... Quiet. Do you hear? Steps again! Oh, people, are you serious?! Okay! We stand still and block this passage with ourselves.” 

The two of them quickly rose from the ground and as soon as they stood on the wall, a family with a child entered the hall. The child, seeing the clown, was very happy and began to pester Buggy with questions about whether he could do it right now a dog from a balloon, does his nose honk, why does he look so strange. 

“I'll kill the little shit myself!” He hissed, kicking the child away. 

“Why are they still here? This is one of the most boring burial chambers I've ever seen!” Catherine asked Buggy in a whisper, glancing at the family, who were walking in circles. “Oh! I don't believe I'm saying this, but grab my ass. Maybe they will feel embarrassed and leave the room?” 

“Oh, with all the pleasure!” Buggy giggled idiotically and at that same second, Catherine felt his hand on her buttocks. She blushed and glanced at the family. They reddened and quickly left the chamber, covering the child's eyes. 

“Great! The child saw the clown grabbing my ass!” Catherine covered her red face with her hands. 

“Oh, come on! He will be fine. Let him see it better now, judging by his dad, he doesn’t even know about such things.” Buddy smiled widely. 

“I hate you. We ruined his life.” She mumbled in her palms. 

“Just the second "I hate you." Honey, you're late today.” Buggy removed Catherine’s hands from her face.  “Focus, Cathie-pie!”

“Oh, yes!” She rubbed her hands, sat down on her knees and looked through the crack again. “Shall we go there?” 

“What? No! I won't let you in there, I'll check it myself.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Listen, I may be a coward sometimes, but never in my life will I allow you to climb into some small room into which a passage opened in the old pyramid.” He blushed, walked down the stairs and walked towards the black box. “This is not a box, Catherine. Another sarcophagus. I’ll try to open it with the hatchet.” He whispered, took out the hatchet and tried to open the lid of the sarcophagus. “Doesn’t work. Do you have any brilliant ideas how can I open it?”

“Wait! I have something written down in a notebook.” She quickly took out the notes. “Not that. Not that. I found! I found it!” She lowered her head to the crack and began to read. 

“Osiris goes to his essence, 

Set goes to his essence, 

He who has the eye ahead goes to his essence. 

And you go to your essence. 

Your purity is the purity of the gods, going to their essences. 

Your purity is the purity of the gods, who departed so as not to experience suffering.”

Essence is the soul. Is there something with a soul sign there? We need to help Amset find Ka and Ba, and he will lead them to the kingdom of the dead.”

“Wait! Here on the lid are this guy with his hands up, your bird and the other one you were talking about. Also, a bird. But the first one's arms are down.” 

“Try to raise them. And I have it written down that Ka and Ba need to turn towards Amset. In general, move the man with the hands and the bird towards the man with the bird's head, okay?” 

“Okay.” 

Catherine looked through the gap behind him. “Is everything okay?” 

“Yes. Wait, those guys are heavy. J-j-ust.. One. Moment. Yes! Fucking gods. Turned it around. What’s next?” 

“Wait a minute! So..” She heard a noise and looked through the crack again. “What is it? What have you done?” 

“I didn't do anything! These Egyptian guys clicked, and it seems the lid opened. Wait!” Catherine heard Buggy groan as he pulled back the lid and began rummaging through the sarcophagus. “Why do these things stink. Fuck, the smell is disgusting. Wait! Cathie-pie!” 

“What?” 

“Yeah, baby! I think, I found it!” Buggy was joyfully twirling part of the scepter in his hands when he heard a crash. “What was that?” 

“I don't know…” Catherine looked around. “Shit! The passage is closing! Get back quickly!” 

“Fuck!” Buggy quickly ran to the stairs. 

“Damn you, Egyptians pharaohs and your traps!” Catherine tried to hold the closing stone. 

“Damn. I’ve dropped the scepter!” 

“Fuck this shit! Get out!!” 

“Already picked it up, don’t worry!” 

“This shit is closing!” Catherine watched as Buggy ran to the stairs and began to climb. “Come on! I don't know how to hold back the Egyptian doors!” 

“I'm coming!” As soon as he got out, the passage slammed shut. “A couple more seconds, and you could become the widow of the clown pharaoh, cotton candy.” Buggy said, sitting down on the ground. 

“Idiot!” She hit him in the shoulder. “You could have used your chop chop thing to get out faster!” She hit him once again and hugged him.  “Are you okay?!” 

“You just beat me up, and you're asking me if I'm okay?”

“Don’t ever do that again, please!” Catherine hugged Buggy tightly and kissed his temple. “Next time use your chop chop thing. I don't want you to stay in some fucking Egyptian trap.”

“Cathie-pie, I’m Buggy the Clown. I would have found a way out anyway. And by the way! Is this what we were looking for?” He joyfully turned the part of the scepter in his hand.

⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥫⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭⥭

“You know, cotton candy, I think it's going to rain.” Buggy squinted at the sky. 

“Yes, you and I are lucky. To manage to get caught in a rare rain in the desert.” Catherine hugged him from behind, “Well, we don’t have many options. Or sit in the rain, but I don’t know how this will affect you. I don't want you to get hurt. Actually, we have food and booze. We can settle into the car and spend the night in it. Sounds interesting, right?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Then get everything we need from the trunk, I’ll fry the sausages before it rains.” 

While Buggy was dragging the plaid, pillow, snacks, and beer into the car from the trunk, Catherine quickly build a fire and fry sausages. 

“Do you need help?” He asked, approaching her. 

“No, I'm almost done. Get in the car, it's about to start raining.” Catherine drove him away with a branch. “Shoo, clown!” 

As soon as it started to rain, she grabbed the sausages, threw them into the box and ran squealing into the car. 

“Haha, I made it!” Catherine placed the box on the panel. “So, what do we have here? Warm french fries. See? I told you that buying a thermal bag was a cool idea. Chips, cookies, grapes, chocolate, beer.” She brushed her slightly wet hair out of her face and felt his hands pushing her wet braid back. 

“You're soaked.” Buggy took off his sweatshirt and threw it on her.

“Who? Me? No. I’m fine. Let's start. Bread, sausage, and lots and lots of ketchup and mustard for my little bear.” She quickly made a hot dog and put it in his hands. “Eat. You're hungry.” 

“Yes!” He took a bite of the hot dog. “I got you a blanket and a pillow, they are lying in the back seat.” 

“Thanks! You’re so caring.”

Catherine watched as he contentedly chewed his hot dog and washed it down with beer. “Tasty?” She stroked his head. He nodded, taking a bite of the sausage. 

“Shit, I need to change my t-shirt. The one I’m wearing right now is still damp.” She crawled from the front seat to the back. “Oh, I see your t-shirt is here, I’ll take it. And don’t look at me in the rearview mirror.” 

Catherine took off his sweatshirt, began taking off her t-shirt and glanced at Buggy, who was already staring at the mirror. “Hey! What did I tell you?” 

“I’m not looking at you. I’m looking at.. At cars and camels. Over there.” He pointed his finger at nowhere. “You just can't see them because of the rain.”

“Jackass!” She changed the t-shirt, put his sweatshirt back on, sat on her knees in the back seat and leaned forward. “Give me french fries.” Buggy calmly handed her a box of potatoes and put two sausages in it. 

“Thank you!” She kissed him on his cheek, took the beer from his hands and took a sip. “Bliss! Well, I guess we're stuck here until morning. It's not worth driving on sand in the rain, and you need to rest.” 

“Apparently, yes.” He grabbed the bottle back. 

“Well, at least your car is comfortable.” Catherine pecked him on the cheek a few more times, and quickly put several potato sticks in her mouth. 

“What's wrong with you? Why do you always do this?” Buggy tried his best to appear dissatisfied.

“I just love my little bear.” She stroked his shoulder. “I’m so happy that I spend time with you searching for treasures. Who would have told me about this a year ago, when I was working in the library and dating Mickie Squicky.” Catherine watched as Buggy’s face tensed and changed.

“Squicky? Life punished him. And what did you do with that Minty?” 

“He's Mickie. Nothing special. Regular dates, you know. We went to the movies, for walks, and kissed.” She watched him blush under all his makeup. 

“That's all? Did you do something else?” Buggy asked dryly and began to tap his fingers on the bottle.

“I love when you're jealous.” Catherine smiled widely, lightly tapped her fingertips on his shoulder, and kissed his cheek. 

“I'm not jealous!”

“Yeah, yeah. I don't believe you. You are already as red as your nose and if you met Mickie now, you would strangle him.” 

“I told you, I’m not jealous. I don't care if some Milty took you around the parks, hugged you or maybe saw you naked. I’m totally fine with that.” Buggy took a sip of beer and began to move his finger along the steering wheel. 

“My blue-haired liar.” Catherine ruffled his hair and took grapes with chocolate. She leaned back, crossing her legs. 

Buggy finished his hot dog and, holding the bottle in his hands, made himself comfortable in the front seat. “Fuck, yeah. Are you okay there, Cathie-pie?” 

“Hey, why are you sitting there? Come to me.” 

Buggy looked at her in bewilderment. 

“The two of us could easily fit here. Wait!” Catherine put a pillow on the door. “Here! That's better! I'm waiting for you, little bear. Come here.” 

He looked at the back seat again. “Okay. Just hold the beer.” Buggy gave her the bottle in her hands and climbed into the back seat.

Bam!

“Fuck, I hit my head.” He said, sitting down on the seat. 

“Does it hurt?” Catherine ran her hand over his head. “Let me see.” 

“Nah, everything is fine.” He gently put her hand away.

She pecked him on his lips. Buggy leaned his back on the pillow and Catherine quickly sat down between his legs, pressing her back to his chest. He hugged her with his arm. 

“That's better.” She took a sip of his beer and put a grape in her mouth. “Chocolate?” She handed him a candy bar. 

He took it and bit. “Yummy.”

“You know, our treasure hunt reminds me of my father. He and I were very close. You know, we constantly went to all sorts of archaeological exhibitions. He brought interesting articles that he found during his journalist trips and imagined how we would travel around Egypt and find some ancient inscriptions. I remember we were sitting in the park one day, eating ice cream, and he was sad that his daughter would someday marry a boring guy who wouldn’t go beyond his own home. He and I were already planning a trip to Egypt, when suddenly his heart stopped. It was hard for all of us to cope with the loss. I felt very lonely after his death, to be honest.” Catherine felt he hugged her tightly. “My mother loved him so much. She died a year later on the day of his death. Oh, Buggy, it was such a big love. I've only read about feelings like that in stupid novels.”

“How did they meet?” He took the beer from her hands and took a sip. 

“My mom was brought to the party at the bar by her friend. She was drinking a punch when she saw a guy, standing near the bar counter, with such a huge bouffant on his head. He was wearing a leather jacket and suspenders. She said his hair looked like a tumbleweed, although my father said he looked cool. He came up to meet her, but she rejected him. My mom said she thought he was an asshole. My dad spent a month trying to get a date with her. He met her near the university and work, she worked as a cashier in a cinema. But one day he climbed into her bedroom with lilac branches. And, apparently, she saw something in him. Then they got married, moved to Loguetown, and then my sister and I were born.”

“Near the bar? And seemed like an asshole? Sounds familiar.”

“Yeah. My sister said the same. But I don't understand why she said so. I just know my father would be glad to meet you. I hope he is now looking at me from heaven and rejoicing. His daughter found a sexy man with whom she travels around the pyramids and looks for something that may not exist.” Catherine felt how Buggy hugged her tightly and pressed his cheek to her temple. “I’m so happy I have you in my life.” She gently placed her hand on his head. “Shit, I made you sad.” 

“Nah, it’s fine. You miss someone important to you.” He kissed her temple. “Listen.. Cathie-pie, can.. can I ask you a question?” He took a sip. 

“Sure!” She stroked his cheek. 

“You mentioned that one.. Mickie. All these guys.. Did you lo.. At what age did you start going on dates?” Buggy cleared his throat. “Apparently, you had a lot of boyfriends. This doesn't surprise me, because.. you know.. You are smart and beautiful. But I'm surprised you didn't find a nice guy there.”

“It seemed to me that you wanted to ask something else. But ok! I started going on dates when I was 15, I guess.” She took the bottle from his hands and took a sip. “And no, I didn’t love them. Well, that is, at the age of 16 it seemed to me that I did. But then I was a teenager, so.. Even when I was 25-27 years old, I don’t think I was in love with anyone. What, you're afraid I treated everyone like you?”

“I.. I don't kn~~. I don't th~~ Never mind.” He took the bottle back. 

“No, my blue-haired love, you're special to me! Remember that, okay?” Catherine scratched his arm with her fingers. “What about you? You probably had a lot of girls. Tell me at least a little, I’m so interested in what you had in your life before we met. I promise not to be jealous. But if you don’t want to talk at all, then fine.”

“Well, it was hard to call it a relationship. Just meetings for one or two nights. Just.. you know.. not be alone sometimes. I don’t know. Who needs me?”  

“I hate it when you say that. You’re funny and handsome. I don’t really understand where the girls were looking. Were they blind or what? But on the other hand, I got you, so I won.” She ate a grape and put two berries in his mouth. “It's not easy to be with you, but I’ll handle it.” 

“I hope you won't leave me because of this.” Buggy sighed heavily. 

“Of course no. Oh! You know what sitting with you here reminds me of? The day when we in the corridor when the door was blocked. Remember?”

“Oh, the day when I had my second click.” 

“Wha-a-t? Really?!” She asked surprised.

“Fuck! Did I let it slip again? How did you do that, little shit?! Well, yeah. You were examining my head after my fight with Crocodile and you looked at me.. you know.. Somehow special.”

“Wait. So both clicks were when I showed concern to you?”

Buggy was nervous. “I guess. You.. You were so kind and your arms were.. you know.. so warm. It was so nice to feel your.. you know.. touch. And then you told me you don’t like me, and settled under my armpit. I was confused and didn't know what to do. Because, you know.. It's not every day that I find myself locked in a hallway with a beautiful girl. But that was.. was nice. And I thought “oh, no, maybe ask her out on a date.” 

“Said the man who took me to the airport later.” Catherine scratched his hand. 

“How long will it take you to remember this for me?” 

“I'm planning for a year now. Maybe two. Didn’t you understand then that I fell in love with you?”

“I don’t know. Your concern was new to me. And this is still new. Do you remember, I promised to take you to the circus? Well, you know.. I wanted to ask.. ask you out, to be honest. But your sister came.” Buggy began to worry and felt Catherine took his hand. “I.. I wasn't sure you'd agree. And I didn’t think that such a beautiful girl could.. you know… love me. I thought you'd fly home, I’d suffer a little and move on with my life.”

“Because you're a fool. It's good that you have me now. Otherwise, you would sit on your bed and cry into the pillow.” 

“I don't cry into my pillow, I'm a grown man.”

“You cried three weeks ago because the acrobats weren't doing well at rehearsal.” She stroked his arms. “Thank you so much. I was happy to hear that. I know how was hard for you to say that. I’m so, so proud of you!” 

Catherine was silent for a moment, stroking his arm. “Do you hear that? The rain is pattering on the roof. God, I'm about to burst from the romance of the moment.” She laughed until she cried. “You'll have to explain to my sister why I no longer exist. Catherine loved her clown so much that she couldn't stand one of the most romantic moments of her life, and she exploded. And excuse me, all that was left of her were socks.”

“No, you have to survive somehow, I still need you in my life.” Buggy kissed her temple. 

“Of course you need me. Who's gonna feed you?”

“What, you think I'm with you just for the food? Believe me, there are much more interesting things I like to do with you. Not just breakfast.” 

“You're disgusting. And I love you so, so much, my Buggy Bear. You know that?”

“First time I’ve heard it. And could you please change that terrible nickname? I think you've mocked me enough already.”

“No! Stop whining. I like your nickname. And my silly clown.”

“I’m listening, my Cathie-pie.”

“I don't know how you're doing it in this position, but stop grabbing my ass.”

[juniamyap]

"Exploring artstyle" is such a lame excuse lmao. Straight up feeding delusion bcs you're biased rn😭. Because be so fr🙏. Keeping lying lil bro, one day she'll turn to Quartelz's huge ass ego.

I never mentioned her other accusations either idk how you can interpret this as defending Quartelz dawg.💀💀 I'm talking about how hypocrital she's being on this SPECIFC reason she's using to hate on her, not the other ones. How does me pointing this out equate to me supporting groomers, i'm starting to notice a pattern here PLEASEEE. Talking about Quartelz throwing up defamation when you're doing it to someone you don't know too. Good lord, ima make a doc on you both too! AGAIN, HYPOCRISY!!!

Also, by your logic I can just say "Quartelz is taking inspiration/redesigning ______'s designs, and calling it an ORIGINAL CHARACTER(OC), it's not stealing!"

Conclusion: Robin and Columbina belongs to Hoyoverse, give your credits. I literally have no idea who Quartelz is, (good lord she's insane from what i'm hearing) nor do i gaf bcs this is random animation meme drama, how are yall like adults or sth, just take it up to court ong. When i see hypocrisy, i point it out! Thank you!

(One thing i will admit tho, the microwave meme thing you guys have going on is kinda funny. Genuinely mean that statement.)

thank you the microwave bit is funny…

second off, if you dont even know about quartelz and the situation, why did you feel the need to bring it up? thats why im confused here hun. if you wanna talk to me, id appreciate you message me rather than hide behind anon.

this isnt my situation to be in, as i stated, but tbf you went out of your way in a situation you didnt care for to do what exactly? we can all be mature here, and im willing to be mature as well, but lets not bring up things that dont need to be then, yeah?

i appreciate the bits where you were respectful.

edit: they use they/them prns btw! i understand you didnt know at the time of writing this though.

[dialoverstalking]

people need to realise that everyone will have different opinions, and you can't force/pressure someone to change theirs.

i do disagree with some of the opinions on this blog but that's it. agree to disagree. i believe it is also healthy to hear a range of different opinions as it can help understand your own better but ong stop sending threats to this blog because you disagree with it. admin has not harrassed or sent death threats to anyone whose opinions they disagree with and two wrongs dont make a right.

Bro fr, someone went as far into telling me to “ kms” like bro? We all got different feelings and opinions on this fandom, no one is telling you to feel the same way, the fact that people went as far into harassing me just tells how embarrassing it is and make the fandom look even worse. Y’all blaming me for ruining it? Say thank you to the person who send the “ kys” threat cause now people are gonna start blaming some of y’all 😹😹

[sylsdiary]

7/5/24 (1:43am)

Dear Alyssa,

Hi honey. You’re so sweet. I know you’ve been having a hard time recently. It’s hard to work through your feelings. I hope you know that that is completely normal and that you deserve patience and kindness while you feel your feelings. You’re in uncharted territory right now! Look girl, you’ve been through A LOT. And you’ve done such a great job and handling it all. But with all of the things you’ve experienced, you’re bound to have some emotional consequences come up, especially when you’re in a place of vulnerability like being in a relationship. It’s totally normal. I want you to know that you’re not hard to love. At all. It feels like that sometimes. But it’s not true. You are so loveable and kind and sweet. You are so deserving of good things. You’ve had bad moments, but that doesn’t mean you’re a bad person who deserves punishment. I love you so much. You are so patient and kind and understanding to those around you, and you deserve the same treatment. Let’s put beauty to the side. You are so kind. You are so radiant! I mean, truly energies are lifted by your presence. You have been told so often that people feel welcomed by you. What a lovely way to be talked about! You know that feeling when someone makes you feel like you belong? How lovely is it that you’re able to give that feeling to so many people!!!! And goodness, not only are you kind, you’re so funny! You make people laugh and you’re such a joy to be around! You also are an amazing and thoughtful friend. You listen with intention, you consider how your actions affect other people, you are there for your friends and people when they need you. You put others before you and think about them often. You are considerate thoughtful and caring. Beyond your personality traits…just in general, you’re everything I have ever dreamed of becoming :) Seriously. Think of the person you wanted to be a few years ago. Kind, confident, funny, loved, smart, successful. You wanted to start a student org and you did! You wanted to earn a 4.0 and you did! You wanted to be better at fh and you are! You wanted to be a better leader for fh and you are! Gosh ong that reminds me you’ve been away from fh so much you’ve forgotten what a community of LOVE you’ve built there. Seriously you should be so proud of that. Your energy radiates through that team. But that’s off topic lol. You wanted to have a community of ppl at vcu and you do. You WNATED TK SRUDY ABROAD AND YOY ARE!!!! You wanted to be financially independent and you are. You wanted a full ride to college and you got one. You wanted a full time job at DE and you got one! You wanted to stand your ground with your mom and you did. Good golly everything you’ve ever wanted and hoped for yourself you have MADE A REALITY. It didn’t fall into your lap. It wasn’t luck it wasn’t by chance. You made it happen. You did. What an amazing lady.

I hope you know that no matter what you go through, gosh you will find some way to turn it for the better, like you always do! And I hope yoy know that you deserve good things. It’s truly an honor to be with you in any capacity, and you are a light in the world. I love you so much from the bottom of my heart. I want you to feel beautiful, I want you to feel secure, I want you to feel loved. I want you to trust yourself!!!!! Trust that you can and will handle anything that gets thrown your way. Trust that you have everything you need within yourself. Trust that you are whole on your own. And also, trust your emotions! You are allowed to feel. You don’t need to try to justify your emotion. If you feel something let yourself feel it! But you don’t always need to trust your thoughts. Some thoughts are just thoughts that can pass like clouds. When bad thoughts come in, remind yourself that they’re just thoughts. I love you. I hope when you’re reading this that you can feel that. I am giving you a big hug. ❤️

[jijipeaches]

Hi! I'm Jillian Mae, you can call me anything. But before I tell myself I just want to let you know that this is my first blog. At this time let me tell you a little bit of information about Jillian. May you be happy and understand my short story for you.

To tell you more about myself. I live in Brgy. Solong, Can-avid Eastern Samar. It is a rural area but full of nutritious crops and most of our area are farmers. I grew up with gratitude to my family. We are not rich, we are not poor either. I'm the kind of idealistic woman, I really do love arts like music, drawing, dancing, designing interior and exterior house all just about art.. If I remember, I think I have an awesome childhood, all we want we get. But as we grow older, I notice why do I feel different from them? Why do all my cousins seem so easy to make friends with other? Why do I always feel so quiet? I don't even have a friend at least one?. Fast forward in 2017 of course that's at the level of curiosity. As a teenager, I try to find out where I belong?, Who am I?, What should I contribute, or what should I do to do to love someone else?. I was so happy, I made a lot of friends, I became better known throughout our campus because of my friends. But as long as I think I don't belong to it, why don't I really enjoy it? Why is my real personality coming out?. It seems like it's not right to please everyone else. Then, I say Lord, I'm so tired. I also saw in their eyes that were full of bitterness, hard hearts, wounds and problems that I just realized that they were rebels but the advantage of them is smart and really good in academics.

When I became a senior highschool, I started to stay away from them. It's changing, but I have to get away from toxicity. There I was more into who I was? And at the age of 18, it was funny, that I knew I was an introvert. Why am I gentle and modest. There I also saw myself in the mirror that I had suffered from depression and suicidal thoughts, so I was looking for validation for other people because I couldn't find it within my family. Because we were a broken family and it was harder to admit to me that they had their family. But now that I'm 20 I found myself forgiveness and acceptance not only for myself but for others. There I realized that when I was lost, the Lord was just there and I now understand why I need to get away and grow more of what I have because God preparing me for the upcoming breakthrough and the purpose of me Why did he raise me.

I share this to you because, in the world that is full of problems, I am strengthened by the time and will be strengthened by the coming. I wrote this not because it's my blog, but for the young people who wandered away, young people were full of questions. I just want to tell you that if I miss it, not by shouting but by faith. Because of the emergence and forgiveness I was released from the darkness, pain and the chaos of my life back then. If I had been able to handle my challenges as a teenager, you would be able to now make more powerful resources to make you stronger 💪.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

September 08, 2023

Padul-Ong Festival 2023 in Philippines

By: Hellotravel

The Padul-ong Festival is the province’s way to pay homage to its Patroness, the Blessed Virgin Mary. The capital city of the province, pronounced as “bo-rong-gan”, was derived from the Waray-waray word “borong” which means “fog. The festival commemorates the day they received the image. It depicts a mythical presentation on how the image of the Blessed Virgin Mary was inexplicably transported to Borongan City all the way from Portugal. The festival also illustrates the legend of a mysterious “Lady in White” who allegedly visits the Hamorawan Spring regularly.

According to the locals, the Lady in White has been blessing the spring waters with miraculous healing powers. Every September 7 or 8, Borongan City celebrates an early morning mass in a quaint chapel at Barangay Punta Maria. The mass signifies that the Padul-ong Festival has officially started. From the chapel, the small image of the Blessed Virgin Mary is transferred to Rawis Port. The first part of the festival which usually starts at 5:00 in the morning is the fluvial procession where boat owners can join along with the official boat carrier of the small image across Rawis Bay.

The image is then paraded through the town going to Borongan Cathedral. At the Borongan City plaza, you can watch the re-enactment of the transportation of the Blessed Virgin Mary. It tells the town’s old legend on how the image was brought to the Philippines. Celebrate with the Boronganons, join the procession and be amazed at the colorful costumes of the performers while enjoying the lively beat of the drums during the street dancing parade.

Reference/Resources:

Hellotravel (2023). Paduol-Ong Festival 2023 in Philippines. Hellotravel. https;//www.hellotravel.com