#nahh hun you’re so far off

[save-the-villainous-cat]

So! I know you did inexperienced villain with a hero that's been there for a long time but what if it was the opposite? The hero is new (could possibly be thrown a lot of work without knowledge on how to do them, pretty naive and just wanted to save everyone) and they found the villain but they're nervous and pretty awkward. You're singlehandedly saving the heroxvillain prompt tumblr and I've been reading every single one godbless

-I,A

“Oh.”

“Oh indeed.” The villain cocked their head and observed the hero calmly. They didn’t have their suit on, had barely anything on and yet, the hero was terrified of that seemingly normal person staring at them.

“I…sorry, this must be the wrong address,” the hero muttered. It shouldn’t have been that terrifying — after all, the villain didn’t have any weapons (the hero knew of) on them and altogether, they seemed to be getting ready for bed.

But, hell, the things the villain was able to do were beyond horrifying. The hero had done their research, had educated themselves on everything the data system had to offer. No matter how many times they updated the system, every time they read the same thing.

Weaknesses: Unknown.

It wasn’t necessarily the violence. It was the intimidation and the blackmail. It was their choice of words and how they looked at people. The villain was so incredibly careful with everything they did, it even surprised the hero how they’d come this far.

“No, you have the right address,” the villain said. The hero felt quite stupid where they stood in the living room. The window was still open from their rough entry and they considered just jumping out of it. That would have probably been the first smart decision of theirs today. “You’re that newbie.”

“I—” Their face started to heat up. The villain knew about them? The hero had made one public appearance and that had been a month ago. One. One.

“Wow. You’re impressive, detective.” The villain crossed their arms in front of their chest and smiled. They had dimples. “How many graveyard shifts did you work through to figure this out?”

“I…I’m arresting you.”

“Technically, you can’t arrest me and heroes aren’t supposed to say that.” The villain shook their head and tutted. “You could get into big legal trouble for that.”

The hero’s eyes widened. That sounded plausible but they couldn’t remember if it was true. They couldn’t tell if the villain was lying to them or not.

“Crap,” the hero whispered. They looked down at the ground just for a split second and then, suddenly, the villain pushed them into their armchair and got on top. Somehow, they were pressing a knife against the hero’s ribcage.

“Nononono— wait, please—” the hero begged, putting their hands on the villain’s sturdy shoulders to push them away. It didn’t really change anything, though.

Their heartbeat skyrocketed and they started to panic.

They felt so stupid. Of course they hadn’t called for backup. Of course they hadn’t told anyone about their current location. Of course they were totally gonna die on this chair.

“Mmm,” the villain hummed, satisfied by the hero’s reactions. “How did you find me?”

“Ahh— analysing your routes and mapping and please don’t kill me—” The villain chuckled softly but the hero didn’t feel any more comfortable. They were so close that the hero didn’t even dare to let out a breath.

Their enemy’s eyes were on them, studying them relentlessly. The hero could feel the warmth of their skin under their fingertips, right there where they touched the villain’s bare shoulders.

“Gosh, you’re adorable.” The villain let out an honest laugh and leaned in. They seemed to be very invested in this. “Did you put up any cameras?”

“…no, I reckoned you’d find them—”

“You’re damn right about that. How’d you do it, then?” They moved the knife and finally, the hero allowed themselves to breathe again. The villain let the knife disappear and the hero prayed it wouldn’t show up between their ribs next.

“I asked for the footage from stores or cafés…and I, uh, sometimes I spent a few hours on rooftops.”

“Mmm. Dedicated. I like that. What did you do then?” the villain asked. Their hand was still on the hero’s shoulder and their other one on the armrest of the chair. It was quite impossible to break free, especially with the villain being merciful enough to put away the knife.

The hero didn’t want to risk anything.

Besides, the hero was clearly no match for them.

“I documented everything. And then I took a map of the city and started to draw your routes…I considered the sewer system, too. I got twenty-eight different locations where you come from and disappear to regularly.”

“Why’d you choose this one?”

“There’s a supermarket across the street. I figured you wouldn’t have much time for grocery shopping. So, after a fight or something you could still get some food.”

“Is that so?” The villain’s mouth curled into a smile again. “You’re actually wrong about that but the rest is thoroughly impressive. I guess you’re very lucky. Good job.”

“Oh, I—”

“I hope the agency gives you a promotion,” they said. With their hand, they pushed loose strands of their own hair out of their eyes. “And I’m sorry we have to meet under…these conditions.”

They looked down at their own half-naked body and the hero followed their gaze. Which they regretted quickly. Their entire head must’ve been red.

“Listen, I really don’t want any trouble, well, I mean I am obviously here to catch villains, but technically you’re not…you’re technically not at work right now...right?” The villain grinned again, showing their dimples once anew.

“Are you on patrol, yet?”

“…in two months,” the hero said.

“Two months? C’mon, I can’t wait that long. How can I contact you?”

The hero blinked. Their mouth was dry. “What?”

“I can leave you a note at the library’s front desk.” They leaned in, tickling the hero’s neck with their breath. The hero’s heartbeat spiked. “Does that sound good?”

“Oh— sure?”

“Great!” The villain took the hero’s hand and pulled them out of the chair. They bumped against each other clumsily and the hero felt, once again, incredibly stupid. “Oh, give this to your boss, will you?”

They gave them the knife they had threatened the hero with. They led them towards the door and pushed them gently into the hallway.

“Wait, before I throw you out completely—” their gaze darkened only a little “—don’t put your nose into any villain’s business like that ever again. Especially when you do not have the experience yet. Got it?”

The hero looked at the knife in their hands and then at the villain.

They nodded. The villain winked.

And then the door closed.

At least they didn’t have to climb out of the window.

[allie1804-fan]

Please Assist Me (Chapter 19)

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8,  Chapter 9, Ch6apter 10 , Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15 , Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18

She Said

Back in LA, I found myself home schooling again as Covid was seeing another surge and there was still no vaccine on the horizon.  It was definitely a struggle not having Keanu there in my regular day to day life especially as I still had to deal with the downsides associated with being his girlfriend – like not having my social media fix and getting photographed looking like shit while doing  the grocery shopping!

The memory of that day alone together in New York was seared in my brain;  And it either helped me get through, looking forward to having him home again or made things 50 times worse because it reminded me how much I missed him.

After the amazing sex and snoozing, we’d headed to a café for brunch then spent a couple of hours walking in the park. We weren’t bothered by any fans or photographers and we were just able to enjoy a relaxing time together. It was what we needed after the tension that was there because of the whole publicity issue. And the sex had left us physically relaxed too. We talked about plans for later in the year after John Wick 4 filming had concluded. There would be a 3 week spell of filming in New York then another 3 week shoot in Russia before heading back to New York to finish for a couple more months. The Russia slot had changed due to some problem with permissions to use a specific city which was why they had to break up the New York shoot.

I found myself far more stressed by the renewed lockdown and home schooling this second time around – I think I’d just got too used to Keanu being around so it was like readjusting to being a single parent yet again and I definitely had a shorter fuse.

Keanu came home for a couple of days between the New York and Russia shoots and unfortunately I took out the tension I was feeling on him. He came straight to my house from the airport, exhausted from the shoot where they’d tried to get ahead of themselves so had been doing 12-16 hour days. He’d accumulated a pile of dirty laundry which he asked if I wouldn’t mind doing.

“What? You couldn’t get hotel services to deal with this?” I snapped

“Come on, I’ve been working 6 til 10 every day this week, I just forgot” he pleaded.

“Whatever!”

Later I apologised to him. I put it down to having just had two consecutive school days that week  which was exhausting physically and mentally and I’d been a bit under the weather. He forgave me but there were a couple more tense moments before he went to Russia.

The car to take him to the airport was due soon and he gathered his bags and then pulled me close. I didn’t want to let him go.

“I’m so sorry I’ve been such a bitch!” I grovelled, looking up into his beautiful chocolate brown eyes.

“Hey, it’s OK, I know it’s tough being here holding the fort. I’ve got it good, I know that. I’m busy all day and sometimes into the night on set and I don’t have all the responsibilities you have so, I know it’s hard hun but just think, in August. I’ll be back and we can all just be together for as long as we like. I haven’t accepted any other work yet so it’s just promo for Matrix and John Wick that will definitely happen and that might be done more on line now that we know it works! And who knows, I might just get you pregnant as well!”

 “You have to be here to do that sweetie”

 “I know” he grinned giving my nose a tweak.

 He Said

The first shooting in New York went well and whilst I missed Sophia and the kids, I was working so hard that there wasn’t much time for me to dwell on it. And the memory of that special day alone together sustained me, knowing that at the end of the John Wick shoot, I’d have at least a few months at home before having  to go anywhere on a shoot or promotional tour.  

I kept in touch via messaging and calls and the occasional bunch of flowers or a book sent to her to let her know she was in my thoughts but I know it was harder on her being alone especially when they had to start home schooling again. Julie was still part of the bubble but her baby was still small so she wasn’t always able to do her share, so Sophia and Miranda picked up the slack.  

When I managed to pop back to LA in-between the first New York and the Russia shoots, Sophia was tetchy and I wondered whether it would have been better to simply go straight to Russia and stay out of her way! But she looked tired and drawn so I tried my best to be patient and took the kids out to play in the park for a few hours to give her a break whilst  I was around.  It wasn’t fun being on the receiving end of her temper, but I wished I could make life easier for her all the time and not have yet another period of location shooting ahead of me. I reassured her that once I was home, we’d have a few months at least together and I hoped that maybe then we’d strike it lucky with the baby plans.

 She Said

While Keanu was in Russia, it really was a case of soldiering on. I was still feeling under the weather and constantly taking my temperature in case I was somehow going down with Covid but it was always normal regardless of how rubbish I felt.

We mostly did our calls in the mornings at around 8am as Russia is 10 hours ahead. Sometimes it was phone and sometimes video call depending on how good his internet was.  

The kids would usually pile in in front of the iPad at some point in each call and his smile was so heart-warming to see when they popped up.

“You got any messages for Karina?” I asked him on one call “I’m meeting her for coffee tomorrow”

“Just say hi and that I’ll try to see her and mom when I’m home in-between Russia and NY OK? Only 2 days to go.”

“Yup, I’m counting down the hours” I said showing him my phone screen where I’d set a countdown on my home screen.

The next day, Karina and I sat in the sun enjoying a coffee. Well, I should clarify, she was enjoying a coffee and I was finding mine distinctly weird.

“Do you think there’s something wrong with this milk. My coffee tastes weird."

“no mine’s fine” you sure you’re OK. You look kinda pale.

“Yeah I just think this whole lockdown and home schooling thing is wearing me down. I was OK first time around when it was just 2 a week but now I sometimes get 3 days with 5 kids and I miss Keanu!”

“Poor baby – you should see your doctor though if you don’t feel better soon …………… or maybe your OBGYN!” she said, whispering the last part.

“What?!”

“Don’t tell me it hasn’t occurred to you” Karina said incredulously. “You two are trying right?”

“What?”

‘What’ is all I seemed to be able to say! She started laughing then.

“Don’t worry,  he didn’t tell me anything, I just guessed by some stuff he said without realising and now here you are looking distinctly sickly …… and you were last together about a month ago right?”

I nodded, doing the maths and realising she had a point – I hadn’t had my period in how many weeks now? I hadn’t done the calculations, what with everything going on, it had totally slipped my mind.

I could feel the colour rising in my cheeks.

“you got a test at home?”

I shook my head.

“Well go get one right after this! – he’s home the day after tomorrow right? Well you might have a lovely surprise for him eh?”

After our meet up I went straight home deciding against getting a test  - I was paranoid about picking one up in person and someone recognising me and alerting the press.  Instead I ordered one from Amazon which would be delivered the next morning. Karina texted me a couple of hours later to ask if I had done a test and was frustrated to hear I’d not got one yet though she got why I had bottled it. I told her I wasn’t about to tell her the result before her brother anyway!

 He Said

I sank into the seat on the plane next to Chad, relieved to have the Russia shoot in the can. One of the stewards bought my requested Bloody Mary and I took a sip, a satisfied sigh leaving my lips.

“Happy?” Chad asked.

“Yeah, just glad to have a few days with Sophia if I’m honest. After this movie, my foot is coming off the pedal, I swear”

“Hard being away right? When you have a special someone at home that is?”

“Yup and she’s not been well this whole time  - she’s been doing all this home schooling and it’s too much on your own. I mean those kids are great but, you know, they bounce out of bed at 7 and they just keep on bouncing til 7 or 8 at night like Duracell bunnies!”

“And you want more?”

“What?!” I spluttered.

“Come on, I can tell. You’ve said too many things that have clued me in”

I was blushing fiercely but there was little point trying to hide this from Chad. He’d known me for over 20 years and could read me like a book.

“Oh man, I must be the most transparent person on the planet”

“nahh you’re good at being guarded when you need to but, I just know you, OK? Good luck to you. I hope it works out, you both deserve it”

“Thanks man”

We landed in the early evening  in LA. With the magic of the time difference, our bodies had had 12 hours of flight but it was just 2 hours after take off in terms of the time on the clock. I’d tried not to sleep too much but just enough so that I could stay awake till maybe 10 or 11pm  and then catch up on my sleep that evening. I’d then have a 5 day break with Sophia before heading back to New York for the rest of the shoot.

She Said

I was like a cat on a hit tin roof from 6pm when Keanu texted to say he’d landed. I got the kids ready for bed but let them wait in their PJs so they could see him  - he was there by 7.30. We kissed briefly in the entryway before he came into the house proper to greet the kids and thrill them with a Russian doll and traditional ushanka hat each.  We managed to get them off to bed by 8.30, finally collapsing on the sofa.

I nestled into Keanu’s side, relishing in the warmth and closeness I’d missed for the past 3 weeks.

“Do you want a drink?” I asked.

“No, I’m fine – the only thing that seems appealing is a hot chocolate before bed if I’m honest, I’m running on empty, trying to stay up as long as I can!”

“mmmm, me too and I don’t have the excuse of a long haul flight!”

“Are you ready for your gifts?”

“mmmm yes please”

He kissed my cheek and got up to hunt in his bag.

He’d got me a bottle of Beluga vodka and a gorgeous traditional Russian scarf with pretty red roses woven on a black background.

“Hey, I guess we could have a little welcome home shot on ice?”

 “Yeah sure”  

 “I’ll just get the glasses and I’ve got a little gift for you too.”

I went to the kitchen where my gift was already waiting on the counter and grabbed a shot glass and some ice and went back to the living room and sat down beside him again.

“Just one glass?” he queried.

“Yup, I don’t fancy it right now, sorry – anyway, here” I said handing him a small gift.

“You didn’t have to get my anything!”

“I kind of did” I said simply,  making him cock his eyebrow quizzically at me as he pulled on the ribbon and unwrapped my gift.   There was tissue paper inside which he  pulled open.

He was quiet for several seconds, staring down in his lap before he lifted his dark eyes to mine, a single tear escaping.

“Come ‘ere”

He Said

I  could often be taciturn, in difficult interviews for example, but it was rare for me to be rendered speechless yet that’s what I was after unwrapping Sophia’s gift. I’d never actually seen one before in real life, a strange thing to admit maybe for a 56 year old man, but there it was in my lap: A positive pregnancy test.  We’d done it, conceived at our combined age of nearly 100!,  without any great stress or strain and I was thrilled  - even in my jet lagged state I felt elated and I kissed and hugged Sophia until she couldn’t take any more!

We skipped the vodka and went straight to bed, talking briefly about the details before falling asleep, both  of us exhausted for our different reasons. I spooned behind her with my hand resting on her belly and her hand over mine and smiled as I drifted to sleep.

@fortheloveoffanfic @kindainlovewithk’eanu @omg-imagine @iworshipkeanureeves @fics-not-tragedies @ficsnroses @keanureevesisbae @penwieldingdreamer @witty-wallflower @paperplanesandwallflowers @bitchyslut99 @ladyreapermc @toomanystoriessolittletime @fanficsrusz @keanuficfiles @bitchyslut99