#n thanks for stickin with me everyone i still look at all your comments n smile i love you all

[l35213]

buzzin cos this took me like less than an hour n i was ALSO in an artistic frenzy at like four this morning with some other stuff but please take a doodle of the single best character in the whole entire gaME-

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 20] FINAL

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, sex toys, shibari, dom!seungcheol, dirty talk, overstimulation/forced orgasms, squirting, degradation, name calling, daddy!kink, gags! 😍💕 ✨HAPPY NEW YEAR!!✨ Here’s to more fun fics in 2021! I can’t believe this is our last chapter though omg 😭 It’s been suuuuch a journey and a privilege to write this little series out! I’ve honestly thought about a camgirl/boy series for like, over a year now, and I’m glad I finally did it! I completed one of my goals! 🥺💕 2020 was definitely a wild one, but I want to thank you all so fuckin’ much for supporting me and stickin’ it out with me all year! Here’s to more in the coming year!💕 Also I was proofreading this at the dining table last night thinking my roommate wouldn’t come out of their room but they did(while I was making dinner and my hands were dirty so I couldnt close my laptop ☠️) and they walked past my laptop and now I’m convinced they saw my fucking smut fic right in the open so yes my little mini-break next week is MUCH needed cause I am ✨embarrassed✨ 🤣 I’ll still do my inbox roundup tomorrow and probably answer a bunch of small thirst posts ‘n stuff throughout the week but there won’t be any drabbles! For now, enjoy chapter 20 🥺, have a safe weekend, and remember that I love you~ ❤️🍒💕

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 COMPLETE

Seungcheol wakes up much earlier than you do the next morning; pressing a kiss to your forehead as you groan and snuggle deeper into your pillow.

“Baby, I need to go run some errands for a little bit, okay? Just keep sleeping, you don’t need to get up yet. But, I made breakfast and put it in the microwave for you when you decide to get up later.”

His voice is muffled and you can barely understand what he’s saying but you nod; a soft sigh on your lips when you drift back into dreamland. He takes his time getting ready, checking his phone notifications as he gets dressed and places a note on the nightstand knowing that you didn’t catch a single word he said.

‘Hey, did you get everything I asked for?’

Jimin🧍🏻: of course, who do you think I am? Jeongguk?

Jimin🧍🏻: and btw, i’m just giving you a crash course okay? We don’t really have a ton of time

Jimin🧍🏻: did you watch those tutorial videos I sent you?

‘Yeah, I did some practice on my breaks, but I guess you can tell me if I’m doing anything wrong.’

Jimin🧍🏻: okee, i’ll be waiting. Don’t get here too late!

‘I’ll be otw soon. Thanks again, Jimin.’

“Ow--damn, okay, you don’t need to tug on it so much!”

“Sorry, I’ll be careful! And why are we practicing on you anyway?! Couldn’t you just have shown me pictures or something?”

“How else will you learn if not on an actual body? It doesn’t work the same way, Seungcheol.” Jimin pauses, checking himself in the mirror. “Also, keep in mind she does have boobs so just… go slow, okay? It’s not gonna sit like this on her.”

Seungcheol blushes a crimson red; biting the inside of his cheek at how amateur he was at this.

“Okay…”

Seungcheol is gone for a lot longer than you anticipate and although he replies quickly to your texts, you can’t help but be curious about where he’d gone and what he was doing.

Especially knowing that the two of you had to film tonight and knowing that everything was up to Seungcheol.

A shiver rolls down your body at the thought and you quickly try to shake off the nerves that seem to slowly invade your body when your mind starts to wander.

“It’ll be fine, I’m sure…”

“I’m home!”

“Where have you--oh, that’s… a b-big box? Um, should I be concerned...”

Seungcheol grins, shrugging as he sets it onto the kitchen counter. “Just some supplies for tonight. I had to go pick them up from a friend but I had to make sure everything was right.” He notices the way you can’t seem to take your eyes off of the box; eyes twinkling when he makes his way towards you.

He tilts your head up to meet his in a searing kiss, lips easing into a smile when you wrap your arms around his neck and melt under his touch. You moan against his lips just before he pulls away; staring dreamily at him while his hands start to roam over your clothed body.

“We have a long night ahead of us, sweetheart. Let’s pamper you a little before then, hmm?”

j__min: ??? where’s the loverboy

j__min has donated $200

angelhan has donated $75

therealchan99 has donated $50

xcaliburDK has donated $75

xcaliburDK: is that the sybian? Haven’t seen that in a looong while

You bite your lip and nod, somewhat shy as you sit alone in front of the camera. “Seungcheol’s still… setting up but he told me to start! I’m a little nervous, to be honest…” Your eyes flit to Seungcheol who rummages through the box in the kitchen and from the angle you’re sat in, you can’t see a single thing he takes out.

Earlier, he’d cooked you your favorite meal and even took the time to give you a full body massage before the two of you cuddled on the sofa and watched a movie. To you, it seemed a little too suspiciously tame and you only found yourself more nervous when he made you drink two glasses of water and ever so quietly announced it was time to start getting ready for the camshow.

“He’s being so suspicious! He was even gone for a few hours earlier today…” You mumble; brows furrowed at the camera before checking the comments.

It still amazed you every time with how much money you and Seungcheol made from the camshows and videos and it made you feel even better knowing that everyone loved the chemistry the two of you had together. There were a lot of video requests and ideas mixed in with the comments at any given time and you were definitely ready to pitch some to Seungcheol now that you’d rebranded your channel to be a couple’s channel instead.

“Almost done, sweetheart!”

gc__koo: he told me to watch cuz he was being suspicious with me too 

gc__koo has donated $50

alphagyu97: what is he even plotting

alphagyu97: i am excited to see the sybian again tho ngl

artist8hao: pretty baby gonna squirt for us again?

universe_WZ: hell fuckin yea let us see how fuckin wrecked you get on that machine

You feel your pussy clench around emptiness at their comments; already feeling yourself getting wetter and wetter with the anticipation.

Movement out of the corner of your eye catches your attention and Seungcheol walks towards the bed with a wide smile and the same box in hand. “Ready?” You can only nod back slowly, watching as he dumps the contents of the box right next to your body.

gc__koo: oy

chwenon: oh shit

sleepy_wonu: oh baby, you’re in for it now

sleepy_wonu has donated $100

Your entire body fills with warmth as you look over the various objects; unsure of where to really look first. “I, um--”

A stack of red ropes sits next to a small bullet vibrator that sits next to a ball gag that sits next to a pair of EMT shears and your eyes immediately flit up to Seungcheol who only smirks back at your shocked expression. “I had some other toys I wanted to use but I figured I should go easy on you, y’know? Since you showed me some mercy last night.”

Nodding, you reach out towards the ropes, touching them shyly. “Why red?”

“Thought they’d be on theme for you, babygirl.”

Seungcheol takes his time; remembering Jimin’s words when he tugs the ropes around your wrists.

“Colour, babygirl?”

“G-green… daddy…”

He nods, sitting up on his knees behind you as you sit on the sybian and face the camera. You bite your lip, somewhat embarrassed that you were already soaking the toy underneath you as Seungcheol worked to bind your arms behind you.

“D--daddy, where did you l-learn this?” You whisper, somewhat curious if this had anything to do with why he was gone for so long earlier in the day.

“Mm, daddy’s friend Jimin was kind enough to help me get the tools and teach me a few tricks to make sure I kept my babygirl safe. Wasn’t that kind of him?” You nod gently, gulping when you shift atop the machine slightly in hopes of relieving some of the growing sexual tension in your body. “Why don’t you thank him properly, sweetheart?”

Your hazy eyes make eye contact with the camera, head tilted slightly. “T-thank you, J-Jimin… for--for helping daddy…”

j__min: omg a shoutout ive made it

kitty_junjun: we never thought we’d see the day

tangerine_kwan: and here we all thought you were gonna be the bad guy huh

hoshi_tiger_xx: like when u only see previews of the book online but the rest of it is different ykwim

Seungcheol makes sure your arms are bound snug enough but not too tight; leaning away slightly to admire his rope work. “Feeling okay so far, babygirl?”

Nodding, you whine back slightly. “Y-yes, daddy… But… my--my pussy wants s-something…” He laughs in return, readjusting so that he’s sitting on your side this time to give himself easier access to start the rest of the bindings.

“Is that so? You’re gonna have to be a little more patient this time ‘cause daddy’s not done yet.” He starts working on the rest of the harness; going slow and checking in with you often to make sure none of the ropes were digging into your skin or making you uncomfortable. “You’ll have to forgive me a little though, I’m admittedly a ‘lil inexperienced so our pretty babygirl is only going to be tied up in this pretty harness for tonight.”

gentleman_josh95: the fact u even took the time to learn just for her

gentleman_josh95 has donated $100

artist8hao: seriously, the dedication

kitty_junjun: we stan a man who knows safety and etiquette 

Comments of reassurance and donations flood in at Seungcheol’s small apology and although the two of you are in your own world; you can tell from just the amount of pings coming from your laptop that they all seemed to be encouraging him.

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence as Seungcheol continues to move around you on the bed to finish the harness and a smile graces his lips when he starts to secure the last knots in the back. He can’t help but mentally pat himself on the back at how neatly he’d done it for his first time.

“There. All done, baby.”

Your eyes flit to the laptop’s screen to see yourself; cheeks hot when you see how fucked out you already look and he hadn’t even touched you properly or turned on the machine.

The star harness Seungcheol had tied looks pretty with red ropes and you can’t hide your smile at how good it looks on you too either. “Ah, daddy made it really p-pretty… Thank you.”

This time, Seungcheol nods, letting you admire yourself as he silently reaches for the small remote for the sybian, switching it on.

Your entire body lurches forward as soon as the vibrations attack your clit and you immediately find yourself moaning and grinding down onto the machine as he gives you some relief.  

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Now let’s really have some fun, huh?”

You need to cum.

Badly.

“Awww, is my pretty baby drooling? Does it feel that good on your sensitive ‘lil clit?” He teases, smoothing down your hair as you cry around the ball gag in your mouth; drool seeping out from the side of your lips when he raises the vibrations a setting higher.

You don’t know how many times he’d played with the settings and edged you by now, but all you do know is that the urge to cum only grows stronger as you grind against the machine, soaking it with your wetness as you chase the pleasure building up in your body again.  

Surely cumming was okay, right? He never said you couldn’t.

You whimper around the ball gag, eyes fluttering shut when the tension in your body snaps in the blink of an eye and your thighs clamp down onto the sides of the machine. Throwing your head back, you moan against the gag and ride out your high as Seungcheol watches you from the side.

“Mm, bet that felt good, huh? But I know you want something in that greedy ‘lil cunt of yours, don’t you? You want daddy’s cock slamming into your tight ‘lil hole ‘til it’s full of my cum, right, sweetheart?” He licks his lips, turning off the sybian as you slump forward.

universe_WZ: shit shes so sensitive

chwenon: especially with her arms bound like that i bet she’s on cloud nine rn

gentleman_josh95: her cute lil head is probably all fuzzy already from all the sensations

therealchan99 has donated $100

gc__koo has donated $75

j__min has donated $150

All you can do is whimper and nod; teary eyes blinking back at Seungcheol as he smirks and leans in towards you.

“Mmm, you’ll get what you want eventually. But for now, you’re gonna cum again.”

He turns the sybian back on, licking his lips when he sees your body tensing again. It was always easier to get you to cum a second time and his point is proven when you mewl around the ball gag a few minutes later; chest heaving in stuttered breaths as you try to shy away from the toy still vibrating against your overly sensitive clit when you’re quickly thrown into another orgasm.

“You always cum for daddy so easily, don’t you, babygirl?”

Your head feels fuzzy after already cumming twice in such a short span of time but you nod, head lolling to the side as Seungcheol finally turns the sybian off for good.

Seungcheol gives you a second to catch your breath before he’s scooting in and fiddling with the clasps at the back of your head to take the ball gag off.

A thread of saliva connects your lips to the gag and you whimper at how good it feels to be able to actually speak again. “D-daddy…” Drool drips from your mouth as your lead lolls forward and Seungcheol is quick to bring a hand up to keep your head up as he looks into your lust filled eyes.

“Colour, sweetheart?”

“Still g-green…” He nods back, checking to make sure none of the ropes had shifted. “Would you like some water before we continue, baby?”

“Yes, daddy…”

He fetches you a glass of water, tilting it against your lips as you down the entire glass and you find yourself a little surprised at how needed it was. “Thank you, d-daddy…”

“You’re welcome, babygirl. Ready to keep going?”

You nod, a little bit more energized. “I hope everyone, mmh, l-likes the show so f-far~” Your teary vision prevents you from reading the comments and before you can even make an effort to, Seungcheol is already helping you off of the machine and helping you sit on the bed across from him.

alphagyu97: ugh she looks so fucking good in that harness

angelhan: right? That shade of red looks so good against her skin too

angelhan: so fuckin pretty

tangerine_kwan: pics for the private room later? Plz i beg

Seungcheol takes this time to take off his boxer briefs, cock curving up against his abdomen when he’s fully naked across from you. He wraps a hand around his cock, moaning and spreading the precum down his shaft as you watch. “D’you want this, baby?”

Your lips fall open in a silent moan as you watch Seungcheol jerk himself off and you can’t help but squirm. “Y-yes…”

“Tell me exactly what you want then. Let them hear what a filthy little slut you are for me.” You can’t help but feel miserably empty watching him and despite having already cum twice, you want his cock fucking you open and making you cum again.

“I--I--”

“Yes, babygirl?”

“I, ngh, I want d-daddy’s cock… Please? Ah, I--I wanna feel you fucking my--my pussy into the, mmh, s-shape of your c-cock… And I w-want you to c-cum inside my--my slutty little h-hole…”

Seungcheol scoffs, hips shallowly thrusting up into his enclosed fist. “That’s right. You’re just my slutty ‘lil babygirl that lets me use all her tight holes how I please, right? You like it when I cum down your throat and in your pretty ‘lil ass. But we all know you like it best when I cum in your hot ‘lil cunt. Makes you feel all warm and full, doesn’t it? You like it when my cum is dripping out of your spent cunt and sliding down your shaky thighs.” This time you nod furiously as you whine back in response.

“P-please… Can’t wait any--anymore!”

This time, the impatience takes over as you slightly tug on the ropes; whining when they don’t give. “Daddy!”

And this time, he gives in quicker than he anticipates, growling as he reaches for the EMT shears to cut you from the harness. “Don’t let your arms down, no matter how much you want to. You’re going to strain your arms if you move too fast so let me handle it, okay, sweetheart?”

The sudden gentleness in his voice has a giddy warmth pouring over you as you nod and sit still while he cuts at various points of the harness to make the ropes fall loose around your arms and chest. You keep your arms in the same position like he requested and you soon feel his hands roaming your skin and massaging your arms to get the blood flowing again.

“You’re so good for me, baby.” He whispers against your hair, leaning down to kiss your shoulder before he slowly easing your arms down from being folded behind your back.

He continues to massage your arms for a few more minutes before it’s you that’s getting impatient. “Daddy… Can you fuck me now?” Whispering, you slightly turn your body to the side to meet his gentle stare.

Seungcheol laughs under his breath, nodding. “Lay on your back for me, legs spread.”

You follow his orders as you quickly scramble to get into position; legs spread wide for him to situate himself between.

“Mm, your pussy is still so fuckin’ wet. I wanna taste you on my tongue, baby.” Whines spill from your lips as you shake your head ‘no.’

“No! My p-pussy feels empty, I need y-your cock, daddy… ‘n I’m so wet, you can probably, ah, just s-slide your cock in…”

He wraps a hand around his cock just as you wrap your legs around his waist and he guides himself until the head of his cock is right at your entrance.

Neither of you say a word as he slowly starts to sink his cock in; guttural moans on his lips when he meets no resistance and bottoms out in a singular thrust. “Holy fuck, your cunt is so fuckin’ wet. Shit, and so t-tight!” You clench around him, already feeling good with his cock inside of you as you beg him to fuck you hard and fast.

“Ngh, p-please fuck me like--like I’m your, hah, c-cocksleeve… I want it f-fast, daddy!”

He grits his teeth at your words; drawing his hips back before snapping them into you just how you wanted. “Fast, hmm? All you think about in that pretty head of yours is my cock pounding you open, huh? Slamming into you so fuckin’ good, it makes your toes curl when you cum.”

Seungcheol starts a quick pace, already feeling the pleasure building up for himself when you’re reduced to garbled noises and broken cries of his name. The heels of your feet dig into the small of his back as you try to press him in closer and he’s quick to reach for the small bullet vibrator left on the bed next to your body.

“Your body is so fuckin’ sensitive, I can already feel how tight you’re getting around me. So fuckin’ greedy to cum too. Already came twice and you still want more. You’re not satisfied until your whole body is shaking underneath me, huh, sweetheart?” He turns the small toy on, pressing it to your clit as you yelp and let out choked sobs.

“Ah, ngh, d-daddy, my--my clit’s t-too sen--sensitive! I--I can’t--!” Squirming, you feel the pressure building up obscenely quick; bottom lip quivering when he takes one of your free hands and makes you hold the toy to your swollen clit.

“Just a little more, sweetheart. Don’t you wanna cum?”

He angles his thrusts to graze against your g-spot and loud cries of his name leave your lips in a hurried, jumbled mess when he only doubles his pace.

The sound of donations and comments pour in like water and get lost within the ringing in your ears; unable to even warn Seungcheol that you’re about to cum when you feel your entire body starting to lock up underneath him.

Your lips part in a silent scream and your back bows off of the bed, thighs shaking uncontrollably as you cum for the third time. Seungcheol growls, fucking you through it as you squirt all over his lower half.  He finds it harder and harder to thrust into you as you cum, but he feels himself quickly following suit with your warm walls fluttering around his cock.

“Fuck, baby, that’s right. Squirt for me, get me fuckin’ soaked while you cum.” He uses a free hand to make sure you keep the toy pressed to your clit, growling when he starts to unload his cum inside of you. “Mmh, gonna fill your cunt up with what you want, baby.”

A shaky moan leaves your lips as you feel him throbbing inside your pussy; walls clamped down onto him in a vice grip as you ride out the remnants of your orgasm.

“Ah, d-daddy’s cumming suh--so much inside of my p-pussy…”

Whining, you feel Seungcheol’s grip on your hand give way as he rides out his pleasure and you take the opportunity to turn off the small bullet vibrator while he doesn’t notice.

You watch his face contort in pleasure, hips still shallowly thrusting into you as his entire body shivers above you.

“D-daddy’s so h-handsome...” You mumble, cheeks hot when he cracks a smile through the pleasure wracking his body and chuckles under his breath. 

“Thank you, babygirl.” 

After you end the show, Seungcheol makes sure to cuddle with you on the bed for a little while longer.

“One more glass of water, baby.” You whine in response, pouting up at him before he gets up from the soaked sheets. 

“But I already had a glass! If you have a piss kink just say so, ‘Cheol!”

He lets out a boisterous laugh at your comment, trudging back to the bed from the kitchen with another glass of water for you. “You need to be hydrated, sweetheart. You came three times and we played a little more rough today. I just wanna make sure you’re okay.” 

“Fine, but you didn’t deny my comment.” You snarkily reply, taking the glass from him as you down the water. 

“Don’t make me have to punish you again! I’ll have you know I still need to get you all washed up and change the bed--”

A faint pinging has the two of you turning to the laptop; still on your camming homepage from where you’d checked the revenues from tonight’s show. 

A small [1] sits above your inbox and Seungcheol is quick to turn to you with an eyebrow raised. “I thought you turned off the messaging system on your profile?” 

You tilt your head in confusion, handing him the emptied glass. “I did. The only messages I should get are from, like, the actual system admins or other creator accounts which, I haven’t received any ‘til... now, I guess?”

Seungcheol sets the glass down onto the nightstand before he takes a seat next to you, dragging the laptop closer as you go to check the notification. 

“’Love&Letter Films’? Aren’t they one of the biggest adult film companies?” Mumbling, you click on the message, giving yourself and Seungcheol a second to process the message that stares back at you; a shocked smile on your lips.

‘Hello!

I hope this message finds Cherry and Seungcheol well. 

We, at ‘Love&Letter Films’, have really enjoyed the shows and videos from your channel throughout the years and we really have enjoyed watching the growth of your channel and the addition of Seungcheol to it. The dynamics between the two of you are rare in this industry and we’ve yet to see anyone like the two of you in this market. 

The shows from the last two nights have proven that the two of you have the right kind of chemistry to film together for bigger productions and we would love to hire you for a few film productions we have planned in the upcoming weeks as a feeler. Of course, all expenses paid by us if you would kindly take our offer. 

We love the various scenes and roles that the two of you take on with ease and we would love to help propel your careers forward, should you pursue a career in the adult entertainment industry. 

Please don’t hesitate to contact me as I’ve listed my contact information below. I’m excited to hear from the two of you and hope to work with you in the future on many projects.

Respectfully, 

Kwon Soonyoung, L&L FILMS CEO���

[thorne93]

12 Days of Christmas (Cuddling For Warmth - Remy Lebeau)

Prompt: December 22 - Cuddling for Warmth - Remy Lebeau

Word Count: 2725

Warnings: language… angst

Notes: For the Marvelous Christmas Challenge @until-theend-oftheline​ @like-a-bag-of-potatoes​…. Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes​ and @carryonmyswansong​ (thank you both, very much).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The mansion was alive with wonder, excitement, and children’s excited cries. As a student teacher at the mansion, you promised Professor X to stay during the holidays to help keep a handle on the kids who couldn’t go home. So far though, they were only having fun. Chasing each other around the grounds, ice skating on the pond, decorating each room. Storm had a class earlier this week for everyone to create their own ornaments or garland.

With only two days to go until Christmas, you were rather excited yourself. All the teachers had put their names in for Secret Santa. The students would get each get one gift. Charles put some back from each tuition to cover a gift of decent size. And each year, the children were asked to give a Christmas list. From that list, the teachers picked one gift.

This way, it ensured everyone got something under the tree, and it was usually a pretty magical time. This year, you’d pulled Scott’s name for Secret Santa. All you had to do was ask Jean to tell you what he really wanted. It was a piece of cake. He wanted a new bike helmet.

As for your secret Santa, you had no idea who was getting your gift. That was the whole point, but typically, every year, you had a hunch. This year, not so much. Which was absolutely okay.

It was getting a little late, around 10:00 pm. You could hear the kids screaming and running in the halls. Charles usually wouldn’t allow this behavior, but classes were out for the holidays, and it was only two days to Christmas, so he let the kids do as they please so long as no one got hurt. As for you, you were in pajamas in your bed, reading. In fact, you were about to go to sleep shortly, until a knock came at your door, then it cracked open.

“Y/N? You awake?” The drawl was unmistakable.

“Yeah, what’s up?” you asked, sitting up in the bed. You tried your best to look extra presentable for the charming Cajun. To say you had a soft spot for Remy would be putting it lightly. Being a southern belle yourself, you had instantly fallen for Mr. LeBeau, his accent, his charm, his mutation, and his ultimate compassion.

Remy was an instructor, but he didn’t teach classes. He was almost like a tutor. He was more there as a stand in for kids needing to understand their power or working on how to control it. He didn’t lecture, or teach History or English or Literature. He didn’t have a study plan. He was just a hands on instructor, who wanted to help the kids when they needed it. He was available before classes, during lunch, and after classes. His ability and extent of patience had made you swoon long ago.

“Saw your light was still on. Didn’t know if you might be up for gettin’ hot chocolate downstairs or maybe goin’ down to watch a Christmas movie with me and the kids?”

Just as you were about to contemplate the offers, the lights suddenly went out. Shrieks and cries went all throughout the mansion. Suddenly, Charles voice invaded everyone’s mind.

“Everyone remain calm, the storm must’ve knocked the power out. Please stay in the room you are in right now while Hank and I look at the fuse box.”

Remy and you peered at each other for a moment. “Well, you heard the man,” he stated as he stepped into your room, a cheeky grin on his face before he shut the door.

“And just what gives you the right to look yourself inside a lady’s bedroom at night?” you demanded jokingly.

“Professor said so. He does not want us out roamin’ the halls.” With that, he grabbed the chair from your desk and pulled it to sit at the end of your bed. “So who did you get for secret santa?”

“I am not tellin’ you that,” you chastised.

“Why? Is it moi?” he asked, teasing you. “That’s the only reason you wouldn’t tell me.”

“Sorry to burst your bubble, but no, it isn’t. The word ‘secret’ is in the name, Remy. I’m not gonna tell you who I got.”

“You take things too seriously,” he accused with a grin.

You raised an eyebrow at him. “Maybe you don’t take things seriously enough.”

“Now that’s just mean,” he feigned, putting his hand over his chest.

You scoffed, rolling your eyes and letting out a laugh. “Oh please, I couldn’t insult you if I tried. Your ego is impenetrable.”

With that, he smiled and straightened in his chair. “Why, thank you for noticin’. I work on it a lot.”

“Speaking of egos,” you began, “how is Reggie?”

Reggie was a young mutant, fifteen, who had a peculiar mutation that was a little hard to get ahold of. Rather close to that of Storm’s, Remy’s, or even Scott or Alex’s powers. Yet, for the last five years he kept assuring his parents he had it under control -- that was, until he took out a neighbor’s house one day. Thankfully, the neighbors weren’t home and no one was hurt. Reggie’s parents were loving, supportive, and concerned about they ordeal. They didn’t get mad, but they did put their foot down about him coming to the school. They trusted Reggie with his powers until this summer when they came by with him. They said they wanted him to learn how to properly handle them, because they were worried he might hurt himself or someone else and not mean it.

Remy, was his tutor. He saw him twice a week after his daily classes. Being a teenager, and rebellious, he hated the idea of needing any special attention.

“Ah, he’s still a little spitfire, but I think I’m gettin’ through to him. When I started to show him that having the ultimate, precision and control over his powers was pretty cool, he started to receive my message better. How’s your classes goin’?”  he wondered, putting his boot on the foot of your bed, his hands behind his head, and leaning back.

“Rather splendid,” you commented. You did have a study plan though, one that Jean and Charles oversaw. They reviewed your itinerary every week and it had to be approved, and it always was. Your area lied in defense against mutation attacks and computer information systems. It was two separate classes, but you taught every day of the week. “Yeah, yeah. Julie has finally picked up a lot better combat. Aaron helped Jason fix a hard drive this week, so I was very proud of them.”

“That’s great to hear,” he complimented genuinely. “How come you didn’t go home for the holidays?”

“The kids need me here… Well, Charles and Hank need me here,” you corrected with a smile and slight laugh. “My family understands that this is important to me, and encouraged me to be here for the kids, and Charles.”

“Very kind of you, and your family.”

“What about you, cajun? Why aren’t you down South?” you wondered.

He huffed out some air. “Oh, same as you, I s’pose. Thought the staff might need a little help with some of the youngins stickin’ around.”

“Always a noble cause, eh, Remy?” you slightly teased with a coy smile. You peered at him with a sad smile. “You never have found your parents, have you?”

He shook his head, a pensive, but sorrow filled smile on his face. You could tell he was trying to hide the pain, disguise it as charm and wit, but not all that deep down you knew Remy was missing a family. He knew some thieves and friends down in New Orleans, certainly someone he could spend a holiday with. Somehow, you felt, that he’d found a new family though, here, and maybe that’s why he stayed during the holidays.

“Nah, but I figure maybe it’s all for the best. They don’t want me... Been too long, and I am… me.”

You frowned. “Remy, how could they not want you? You’re spectacular.”

“I grew up with thieves and cheats, Y/N,” he retorted with disdain. “I’m not exactly a model citizen.”

“You can’t help what the LeBeau clan did to you…”

“No, but I got these eyes.. That’s why they abandon me, mon cher,” he informed with a slight sadness in his voice.

“Then they are the most stupid people in this world,” you stated with confidence. “Anyone willing to give you up has to be the biggest fool I’ve ever met.”

A gentle smile tugged at his handsome lips before he let himself fall from leaning back in the chair. “It’s gettin’ cold as hell out here. Move over, I’m comin’ in,” he said before he stood up and took his boots off.

It was clear he was changing the subject, but for the past thirty minutes, the temperature had dropped to icy due to the lack of power and heat. You scooted over to the left on your bed and before you knew it, Remy had burrowed himself in the blankets beside you. This, wasn’t unusual. He was your closest friend at the mansion and sometimes you two wound up sleeping on the couch together, or snuggling up to watch a movie in your room on Sunday afternoons, usually slipping into a nap.

“Better?” you inquired once you settled down beside him.

“At least I ain’t g’ttn frostbite,” he retorted, putting his hands on his face and rubbing them backwards. “When is the damn power g’n be back on?”

Shaking your head, you answered, “No idea.”

The two of you lied in comfortable silence for a few minutes before he spoke again, curiosity in his voice. “Did ah eva tell you that I was engaged once b’fore?”

You frowned, turning just your head to face him. “What? No? When? How?” You couldn’t help the little green eyed monster that creeped up inside you.

He kept his face aimed at your high, dark ceiling, sighing. “Long… long ago. It was to a girl named Bella Donna. It was actually an arranged marriage.”

“Wow. Really? What was the gain?”

“Settlin’ a feud between two of the bands of criminals.” He let out a huff of air. “But her brother was against it, and he challenged me to a duel.”

A gasped escaped without your permission. The thought of Remy doing something so… dangerous, made your heart still in your chest.

“Well, so what happened?” you urged when he didn’t continue, your face turned back towards the ceiling.

“After the wedding…when Julien had challenged me, I agreed. Bein’ raised as ah was, it wasn’t taken lightly. So I agreed to his terms. Only when we got there, the bastard was such a terrible shot…” He stopped, trying to collect his thoughts, you supposed. “His shot breezed past my shoulder and by pure reflex, I shot back, hit him square in the chest.”

You frowned. You knew Gambit had a terribly sad upbringing, another thing that had made you fall easily in love with him. Someone born from so much sorrow brought so much joy into the world. He was so… good, and pure, his dark past was in no way a reflection of him now.

“That’s so sad… How… how did your wife take it?”

“Uh, actually, I didn’t really know. They banished me from N’awlins for a long time. Til Bella Donna needed my help with somethin’. Professor let me take the X-Men back down to help her, but when we all got to an astral plane… I don’ know, somethan happened and Bella Donna died... “

A full second passed before you grabbed his hand under the blankets. All you wanted to do with the action was comfort him, show your support.

“I’m so sorry that happened. Do you miss her?”

“I did. But it turns out she’s alive, livin’ down in N’awlins.”

This took you aback. Gambit had a wife, but he didn’t… miss her? Sure it was arranged but…

“So… you don’t miss her?”

He let out a breath. “Well… I did, at first. We sort of grew up together. She was my first love. But after her family banished me, and I sort of got out on my own, well, there wasn’t much to miss. Then when I found out she was alive, I just wanted her to be happy. I got no desire to be with her.”

“Are you still married to her?”

“No, no. We took care of that years ago. Cut ties. Now, we don’t talk, but it’s alright. She’s got her life, I got mine.”

A blip of silence fell over you two. “I’m so sorry all of that happened to you, Remy,” you suddenly offered, your voice sad, laced with sincerity. You wanted nothing more than to hug him and make any pain or guilt go away.

“Did you really mean what you said, about the… uh... about my parents not wantin’ me?” he asked, not seeming to want to address his past directly.

You turned your head to face him, keeping your head settled on the pillow. “Of course. Remy, I think you’re wonderful. It’s a privilege to know you.”

“You’re not just sayin’ that, are you?”

“No, no. There’s a reason you’re my best friend. I like you. You’re a good person. In fact, I’m rather jealous of this Bella Donna lady. Anyone who gets to be your wife is one hell of a lucky woman.”

Now, it was his turn to face you.

“You really mean that? You think… you think it’s lucky to be my betrothed?”

“I think she hit the jackpot if she got you. Arranged or otherwise.”

He stared at you for just a few moments more, making your cheeks heat to a million degrees.

“Uh, Remy, what’re you staring at?” you wondered.

“Does it bother you?”

“Only because I don’t know what you’re thinking.”

“I’m thinkin’ you are the sweetest, most kind, most compassionate, most powerful, person I’ve ever met. I’m thinkin’ you make me laugh when I don’t wanna. You never let my past represent me. You look past all my flaws. I’m thinkin’ you’re just about damned perfect, Y/N and I’d like nothin’ more than to kiss you right now.”

“Then what are you waitin’ for?” you asked in a soft voice and before you could blink, he let go of your hand to wrap you in a tight embrace. Fingers danced through your hair with skill, making you shiver from his touch. His face slowly got closer to yours, as you helped close the gap from your side as well. Before you knew it, you two finally connected, igniting your body like a Christmas tree. His lips were surprisingly softer than you expected, but firm and plump. Surprising you, his hand slid down your side, around your waist, where he pulled you closer to him, pressing you against his body. The sensation made you yearn to run your hands into his long hair, hold him close, stay in his arms forever.

Suddenly, the power came back on, lights flooded your room, your bedside clock turned on, your TV regained power, and the mystique that had bewitched the room, was now slowly receding.

The two of you broke apart and stared at each other, unsure what to say. His arm was still around your waist, and your arm was still on his back, but neither of you spoke.

“Wow… That was…” You breathed, slightly laughing.

“Yeah… That… uh… was….” he agreed.

The next thing was Charles back in everyone’s head. “Alright everyone, it’s late. Go to bed. You’re free to leave the rooms you’re in.”

The two of you came back out of the informative thought, peering at one another.

“Do… you wanna leave?” you tentatively asked him, wondering where you two stood now.

“Not at all, unless you want me to go?” he questioned, slightly worried about another rejection.

You brought your hand up, your fingertips stroking his face. “I never want you to go anywhere, Remy. I want you right here, in my arms. So long as you’ll have me.”

An adoring smile touched his face as he pulled you closer again. “I’ll never want anything, or anyone but you, Y/F/N.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[kuntxrgraudunkelbunt]

Rebound girl // Jensen Ackles x Reader

Word count: ~5000

Warnings: Anti Danneel (for the purpose of this fiction she had to be a b*tch, but she is not his wife and they don’t have children for this fiction!), language and maybe it’s a bit angsty-ish? but I guess this is it If I’m missing something please let me know!

A/N: This is my entry for @casbabydontgoineedyou ‘s 1k follower challenge, my prompt was “Wait… You think I’m pretty?” (it’ll be bold in the text) and it’s also my first piece of fiction I’m posting here on tumblr! 

A/N 2: Part 2 (and other stories of mine) can soon be found on @not-moose-squad

Jensen’s POV

Being with Danneel was tiring. She wasn’t the woman I fell in love with two years ago. 

I don’t know when it happened but somehow she changed. She only cared about having my credit card when I was gone – and when I was at home – and about showing off her (fake) happiness. Dee never was someone to post much on social media, but suddenly, when Gen started, so did she. She started urging me to like and comment on her pictures because even Jared can show his love for his wife, so why can’t you? It’s really not that hard, Jensen! I want to be recognized again. Maybe it would be easier if I had your name, Jensen. Don’t you think a wedding in August would be nice?

It was frustrating. She wasn’t my Danneel anymore. When I was at home, Dee didn’t want to spend time with me, she locked herself up in her room, went out on girl’s nights or met up with her brother, yet she was complaining that I was leaving her alone so much. I didn’t know where I went wrong but I knew that I didn’t want to go on like this. Instead of proposing to her I would break up with her, as soon as I was back in Texas.

The next few days were hard on me and everyone on set wondered what was going on with me but I didn’t want to talk about it. Not even with Jared. I knew he was worried about me but I needed time to myself, needed to have this dreaded conversation I would soon be having with Danneel, in my head over and over again. She wouldn’t accept me breaking up with her, I was sure about that. But I didn’t want to spend my life with someone who didn’t want me, but my money and fame. And yet it broke my heart over and over again. I loved this woman. I thought she could have been the one for me.

Maybe it all was my fault. I was gone for almost the whole year, every year, so maybe it was just natural that she had become uninterested in me. The only thing I could give her while I was gone was my money – and some poor face time calls in the evening or only a good night text. Was it my fault? Should I have been more thoughtful?

“FUCK!” I screamed through my trailer and smashed my water bottle across the room. I ran my fingers through my hair and felt tears springing to my eyes.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door to my trailer. I groaned. “Fuck off, Jared. I don’t want to talk!”

The door opened anyway. “Fuck off, yourself, Jensen!” Jared growled back. He sat down on my couch and looked at me expectantly. I sighed.

“Honestly, Jensen, I am so over your shit. You’ve been avoiding all of us for three days and I am not leaving until you talk to me.” And then I told Jared everything.

It’s been three weeks now since I made up my mind. I would definitely end things with Danneel. It broke my heart but I knew it was for the best. The night I had told Jared he agreed with me, said that I would know what was best for me but that he also wasn’t surprised that it had come to this. But on the other hand, Jared has never been a huge fan of Dee. For as long as I have known him he always wanted me to be with (Y/N). (Y/N) was my best friend since kindergarten and basically my soul mate. We were like one person split in two bodies. But never ever have I thought about her in a romantic way and I was sure she felt the same way about me.

Right now I was on my way back to our house in Austin and nervous as fuck. I didn’t know how to start this conversation or what to expect from Dee. But then, when I opened the door, everything changed. Danneel stood there, leaning against the doorframe of the living room. She looked absolutely stunning, wearing a beautiful tight black dress, black tights and high heels. The dress hugged her in all the right places.

“Hi, Babe”, she said seductively and came over to me.

I let my suitcase fall to the floor and hugged her. Her hands rested in my neck, carding them softly in my hair, while mine wandered along her body, eventually resting on her waist.

“I missed you”, she whispered in my ear and began to plant kisses in my neck.

“I missed you, too”, I answered automatically, regretting my words but I was so overwhelmed that I couldn’t say anything else.

Dee kissed me on my lips quickly and then let go of me. “I made you dinner, babe. I hope you’re hungry.” Then she made her way into the kitchen and I was rendered speechless. What was happening? Was she trying to make up for the past few months? Maybe she noticed how we were drifting apart, how she was only after my money, and wanted to work things out. A new light of hope sparked inside of me.

Her head peaked out of the kitchen. “You coming?”

I shook my head and smiled. “Sure, honey.”

At first the evening seemed to be nice. Danneel asked me about my time on set and she seemed truly interested in the stories I told her and her laugh seemed to be honest when I told her how we pranked Misha and Mark Sheppard. It felt like our old times together and I had almost forgotten that I wanted to break up with her. After all it seemed like we could have another chance. But the tables turned when we finished dinner and Dee cleaned the table. She insisted that I’d stay put, “I want this evening to be about you!” she had said, and while she closed the dishwasher she cleared her throat.

“You know, Jay, I was gonna post a picture of our dinner on Instagram and I thought it would be nice if you could comment on it. It doesn’t need to be special, maybe just a heart or a thank you? Just so that people see you appreciated what I did for you.”

I scoffed and bit my lip, making a face. Then I turned towards her. She stood there and looked so innocent, as if she’d asked if I wanted dessert.

“This is what all of this is about? You dressed up and cooked just so could post it on Instagram and get likes?”

She opened her mouth but I cut her off. “You know what, Danneel? I don’t even want to hear it. Of course it was about likes and attention. Everything you’ve done for the past few months was for attention. I am so stupid I fell for you goddamn shit. I… Fuck it, Danneel, I almost believed your shit again!” With that I grabbed the bottle of scotch from the kitchen counter and left. I walked upstairs and locked myself in my bedroom.

Dee yelled my name and asked me to come back but when I didn’t answer she quickly gave up. Then my phone lit up and it was a text saying Can I at least post that picture? All I did was let out a loud groan, then I fell on my bed and started drinking right from the bottle. How could I have been so stupid? I should have known that she must have had something in her mind.

I didn’t know how long it took me to empty the bottle of scotch, I just realized that I started to get tipsy and tipsier and tipsier until the bottle was finally empty and I was drunk as fuck. The world was spinning around me while I was laying flat on my back on my bed. It was then that I decided that I had to talk to Jared; had to tell him how stupid I was for almost falling for Danneels shit again.

I rolled over to grab my phone from my nightstand and almost threw up because everything started to turn even faster. It took me a moment until my view was a bit less blurry and I could see my phone. Unlocking it, I looked for my last chat and dialed the number.

“Jensen? What’s wrong, it’s 1.30 am”, a tired voice said at the other end of the line.

“Padal…Padaleski? I’m so stupid, sooo stupid!” I slurred into my phone, almost choking on the tears that now were harder to suppress.

“I reaaally almos’ b‘lieved her, Jared. Made me dinner’n’stuff, ya know, ma favorite food of all…” a hiccup interrupted me, “of all fugging time, Jared. I thought… reeeeally thought she was gonna make it up to me, ya know? She said she miss”, another hiccup, “said she missed me, Jared. Dunno what I did wrong tho. Jus’ wanted to love her and be loved. Maybe should’a just broken up with her right when I walked into ma house, no back in Vancouver alllready, Jared. Jared ya still there? Talk to me, buddy, need ya to tell me I was bein’ a stupid dumbass for not stickin’ with the plan.”

It was quiet for a few seconds and I already wanted to disconnect the call because I thought that Jared wasn’t there anymore when I heard a tired voice say that I was drunk and that I should drink some water and we’d talk in the morning. “I luv ya, buddy. You the best, least I can rely on ya!” and then the call disconnected.

“Jensen?”

I groaned and shook Danneel’s hand off. “Fuck you!”

“Wow, what a nice way to greet your best friend.”

Immediately I opened my eyes and shot up from my bed, instantly regretting it because it felt like twenty buses hit me at once.

“(Y/N), what are you doing here? Where’s Danneel?” I asked, covering my eyes because it was way too fucking bright in my bedroom.

(Y/N) shrugged. “Haven’t seen her, why?”

Letting myself fall back onto the bed, I sighed. “Do you have an Advil or something? My head is killing me.”

As if she had already known and prepared it before waking me up, she took a glass of water and an Advil from my nightstand. Then (Y/N) looked at the bottle of scotch I downed last night.

“Did you drink all of this?” she asked, nodding in its direction.

I simply nodded, putting the glass back on my nightstand and swallowing the pill.

“Now it makes sense. I was worried about you when you called me last night. You haven’t been this wasted in years. What’s going on, Jay? And why didn’t you tell me that things weren’t going well with Danneel?”

I raised an eyebrow. “What call?”

“You called me this morning at 1.30, Jensen?!”

“No, I did not. I called Jared.”

(Y/N) sighed overdramatically and rolled her eyes. Then she took her phone from my nightstand and showed me her phone list. “Believe me now?”

“Fuck”, I growled, “I am so sorry, (Y/N), I didn’t want to bother you with all of my shit. I’m really sorry!”

(Y/N)’s eyes widened and she shot up from my bed. “Are you being fucking serious right now, Jensen? I am your best friend - at least I thought I was. But obviously you don’t bother talking to me because you think you are a burden? What the hell? Why didn’t you tell me about you and Danneel?” At first (Y/N) had been yelling and I thought my head was gonna burst but then her voice became softer, worry written all over her face.

Looking down on my hands I sighed. “I was… ashamed. You and Jared and Misha…”, I sighed, “you all warned me about her and said that I should be careful and now I seem to get what I deserve for being so stupid.”

For the first time now, I let my tears run freely. I don’t know if it was because I was so hung over or because I couldn’t keep my shit together in front of (Y/N). It felt good to finally let my emotions take over. When I talked to Jared about all this stuff it already helped a lot but with (Y/N) it was different. Both were my best friends but in front of (Y/N) I felt less of a need to keep it together. Breaking in front of her in tough situations like this was somehow easier.

My best friend looked at me and I saw tears shimmering in her eyes as well. “I am so sorry, Jensen”, she whispered, “but you are not stupid. You are in love with her. It is not your fault she didn’t appreciate and love you the way you deserve to be loved.”

(Y/N) came into bed with me and hugged me. I buried my head in the crook of her neck, while she ran her hands soothingly up and down my spine. Then I heard her whisper that she loved me and that eventually, everything was going to be okay.

Reader’s POV

Seeing Jensen like this broke your heart. He didn’t deserve to be treated like this. Yes it was true, you might not have been a big fan of Danneel when she came in Jensen’s life but when you saw them together for the first year of their relationship you thought that they may had a chance. It had shattered your heart because there wasn’t any other thing that you wanted more than being the woman by his side but what mattered the most to you was that Jensen was happy. And at first it seemed like they were.

Danneel tried to attend to as many conventions as possible, she came to visit him in Vancouver and she seemed to accept Jensen’s lifestyle and popularity. It took you a while but you started to accept that she seemed to be the one for him. Yes, it broke your heart. But your friendship meant more to you than anything else and so you settled for that instead of telling him about your feelings and possibly losing him forever.

It didn’t take long and Jensen made up his mind and wanted to propose to her after only one and a half year. But hey, you weren’t the one to judge. It was him who had to make this decision and he seemed genuinely happy. That was six months ago.

Now your best friend – and love of your life – was in your arms and cried because of said woman. It made you hate her. If she had been at their shared home you were sure you would have killed her. Jensen slowly stopped sobbing and you looked down at his tear-stained face. Luckily no new ones were running down his face anymore. He was fast asleep again and a soft smile spread on your face. He looked so peaceful.

You slightly shifted and made yourself more comfortable. You wanted to be there when he woke up. Scrolling through your Instagram feed you liked a few pictures and commented on the new photo Sarah posted of Isabella when you felt yourself drift off to sleep. A small yawn escaped you as you decided that it wouldn’t hurt if you took a short nap as well.

You stirred awake when a phone started buzzing. An arm was draped around your waist and it took you a few seconds to realize where you were. Jensen was lying next to you on his stomach, your legs were intertwined with his and his arm rested on your waist. You smiled. This was certainly a view you could get used to. But on the other hand that’s what you almost always thought no matter what he was doing. Jensen was more than perfect.

The phone had stopped buzzing by now but you checked to see who called you. It was Jared. Normally you would have got up but you were so intertwined with Jensen that you had no chance of getting up without waking him. So you decided to call Jared anyway, you just had to be as quiet as possible.

It rang four times when Jared picked up. “Hey, what’s up?” You whispered.

“(Y/N)? Why are you whispering?” He sounded amused but also a bit concerned.

“I’m lying next to Jensen and he’s asleep. Don’t want to wake him. Why did you call?”

On the other end of the line Jared sighed. “Jay is the reason I called. I haven’t heard from him since he texted me he’s landed safely. How is he?”

You looked over at him. He was drooling a little bit and you giggled. “He’s drooling right now! No, he’s miserable. He couldn’t text you anything. Dee pulled a stunt on him and he just got himself drunk as fuck yesterday. At 1.30 he called me thinking he called you and told me everything. Why didn’t you tell me how bad it was, Jared?”

Jared cleared his throat. “I thought you knew, honestly, (Y/N). You are his best friend as well. I didn’t think he’d keep it from you…”

Next to you, Jensen opened his eyes. “Who you talking to?” His voice was still thick with sleep.

“Gotta go, Jared. See you.” You didn’t wait for him to say anything back and ended the call.

“It was Jared. He wanted to know how you are.”

Jensen mumbled something you couldn’t understand before he turned on his back and stretched. Then he yawned long and loudly before turning on his side, looking at you.

“Wanna get some food? I’m starving.”

You smiled and nodded. He didn’t seem as hung over as he was this morning and you hoped that you could get his mind off Danneel – or more alcohol. Apart from that you were starving as well.

Jensen’s POV 

4 weeks later

I had broken up with Danneel about four weeks ago. It had been hard and she wasn’t all too happy about it but in the end we could talk about it reasonably and she agreed that it was the best for us. We both deserved people who truly loved us and while I did truly love her she admitted that she used to love me but that it had become harder and harder the more time had passed and the more time I had spent in Vancouver.

Despite the rather friendly ending of our relationship I took a week off and tried to keep my mind occupied. I didn’t want to think about her or our house that I left her. I just wanted to get away from everything and anything that reminded me of her. Jared and (Y/N) had been an amazing support for me and (Y/N) even let me move in with her.

(Y/N) was an even better friend than she had been for the past 36 years. When my break was over she even came up to Vancouver with me because she didn’t want to leave me alone yet.

We both laughed a lot when we were together and we reminisced about our childhood memories. I reminded (Y/N) of one story she had long forgotten. We were teenagers and in High School and one of my classmates pretended to have a major crush on (Y/N). (Y/N) was flattered because he was the captain of our school’s football team and basically every girl wanted to be his girlfriend.

I was rather suspicious because I knew him and his friends and how they always turned everything into bets. Even girls. It didn’t take long until (Y/N) agreed to go on a date with him. She didn’t tell me about it because she knew I wouldn’t want her to go. Nevertheless I found out about it and luckily I found them just at the right time. That douchebag was urging her to get into the car with him because he knew that “everyone wants him to be their first”. In that night I had my first fight ever.

(Y/N)’s favorite story was how I pretended to be her boyfriend for four months back when she was in college. There was one creep who just didn’t want to leave her alone and always asked for another date no matter how many times (Y/N) had turned him down before.

It had been a while since (Y/N) and I spent every day together. With me being in Vancouver and her still living in Dallas there weren’t many days we could spend together. Even when I was on hiatus or she had a few days or weeks off, life would sometimes still mess with us. But now that I had spent four weeks with her basically 24/7 because she also came to visit us on set, I got to experience how simple everything was with her. A simplicity that I hadn’t experienced with Danneel. With YN I could just… be.

She was just an amazing woman. Beautiful, smart, witty, honest, funny, fair… I could go on like this forever. But some of the things I started to feel scared me. My heartbeat, for example, that always quickened when she entered the room or when she smiled. Most of the time I just ignored these feelings but I didn’t know if I was imagining it or if they were really getting stronger day by day now. I mean… she had been my friend for 36 years. I couldn’t just fall in love with her now. Right?

For tonight, (Y/N) and I had scheduled a movie night and I was more than looking forward to it. It meant comfy clothes, popcorn and pizza and a lot of fun with her. She was out getting our pizza while I was preparing everything at my flat in Vancouver. The popcorn was done and I put it in two different bowls, one sweetened and the other one salted. Just when I put the bowls down on the table, (Y/N) unlocked the door and came in smiling.

“Babe, I’m home”, she yelled and laughed. It had become our inside joke. A little laugh escaped me as well but it also didn’t go unnoticed by myself that my heartbeat quickened.

“Good, I missed you”, I answered and another laugh shook her body.

“I was gone for 20 minutes. How could you miss me?” She placed the pizzas down on the table and fell next to me on the couch.

I pulled her on my lap and kissed her hair. “You are a wonderful woman. The question should be how I couldn’t miss you!”

She giggled and playfully slapped my hands that I had wrapped around her, wriggling out of my embrace. “Shut it, Ackles. I want to eat!”

I laughed and watched her grabbing her pizza and excitedly cutting it into eight slices. She looked at me from the corner of her eye and smiled, then taking her first bite of her pizza. Grabbing mine and placing it in my lap I asked her what she wanted to watch and she shrugged, not being able to say anything as she was fighting with the mozzarella that was half on her pizza and half in her mouth.

After she swallowed she looked at me. “What do you think of love actually?” She used her puppy eyes on me and I smiled.

“Don’t pull these puppy eyes on me!” I said overdramatically.

(Y/N) smiled knowingly. Her puppy eyes worked perfectly fine on me and I was already looking for love actually on Netflix. I knew she loved that movie and even though I hated it because she forced me to watch it approximately 500 times I loved how much she still enjoyed it.

We soon finished our pizzas and she grabbed one of the popcorn bowls, curling up next to me, with her head in my lap. I didn’t really pay attention to the film but to her. I liked watching her reactions when her favorite actors were on screen or when she was annoyed by the actions of someone in the movie. It was way more exciting to me than actually watching the film.

As she lay there with her head resting in my lap, my fingers traced the skin of her outer thigh lightly in small circles, I felt how her body was covered in soft goose bumps due to what I was doing. It was also then that I really let my eyes roam her body for the first time. Even though I knew that it was somehow wrong I couldn’t help myself. (Y/N) was my best friend since kindergarten, I shouldn’t feel all these things that I started to feel over the past few weeks but here I was, realizing that maybe my missing puzzle piece had been (Y/N) all along.

She was truly beautiful. Her beauty was simple but yet there were so many special things about her. Her beautiful y/e/c eyes that always sparkled when she laughed or talked about something she was passionate about or her hair that she was wearing in a nice up-do today… it actually didn’t matter to me how she was wearing it, she always looked amazing. There were her cute dimples as soon as she smiled and then there was her perfect body. She moved slightly and so her white tank top slid up a bit, giving me a view of her hipbones. Also I just now realized that her red sweatshorts had a Snoopy printed on the left side of her butt. I quietly laughed to myself.

“What?”

“Nothing”, I answered and laughed.

She turned around, now looking up at me. “Tell me, Ackles, or I’ll leave and you can watch your chick flicks alone!”

Alright, Ackles, here goes nothing. “I just think that you are beautiful.”

(Y/N) sat up with furrowed brows, pausing the film.

“Wait… You think I’m pretty?”

I shook my head. “No, I don’t think you’re pretty. I think you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”

I took her hands in mine and smiled. “You have the most beautiful eyes and I love how they sparkle when you talk about things that are important to you. And your smile, it’s so wonderful and powerful you could probably stop wars with it… I think, things with Danneel had to come to an end so I could finally see how beautiful you are. Inside and out. I know this must be weird right now, (Y/N), but I think I might… like you. Like really like you.”

She looked at me skeptically and shook her head. A small, but sad, laugh escaped her lips. “You are confused, Jay. You just broke up with Danneel a month ago, I get it. Being single is hard when you’ve been in a relationship for so long and especially when you wanted to propose to her but had to realize she didn’t love you for who you are. But this isn’t you talking. It’s the broken heart.”

It broke my heart. She looked so devastated. As if I had just told her that I would never want to see her again. This was not the reaction I was hoping for.

I cupped her cheek. “Hey, buttercup. It’s not the broken heart that’s talking, it’s me. 100 percent Jensen talking here.” A single tear rolled down her cheek and on my hand. I brushed it away with my thumb, trying to lock eyes with her.

“It’s just…” A soft sob escaped her and it broke my heart to see her like that. If I had known what my words would do to her I would have never said them. “I have hoped to hear these words for such a long time, Jensen, and now you are saying them but I just can’t believe them. Because if I do and I let myself in for this and you realize that I’m not as pretty as you think in the morning or that my laugh is annoying when you hear it at one in the morning because I’m up watching The Big Bang Theory ‘cause I can’t sleep… What if you realize all that and let me go? I would not just lose my boyfriend, I would also lose my best friend.”

I was taken aback by her words and looked at her, not quite knowing what to respond to that at first. It only got worse when she slid away from me to the other end of the couch.

“(Y/N)…”, I started, reaching out for her but she crossed her arms in front of her chest and tucked up her legs and I felt as if she had slapped me across my face. “I have known you for as long as I can think. Don’t you think I don’t know what you look like in the morning? Don’t you remember what happened the last time I caught you watching The Big Bang Theory at one in the morning? I sat down next to you and we laughed together. Please, (Y/N), give this a shot – give us a shot.”

She looked at me like a deer in the headlights and by now tears were running down her cheeks freely. I felt so helpless. When I told her I didn’t know what to expect and I was probably expecting anything but not that. Not in a million years did I imagine that she became a crying mess because of me, my feelings for her… her feelings for me.

(Y/N) vehemently shook her head and got up. “I can’t do this, Jensen. Not like that. You project all of your feelings you had for Danneel onto me. And I don’t want to be your rebound girl, I’m sorry.” Her voice broke at the end and then she suddenly turned around and quickly ran over to the front door.

I got up as quickly as I could but before I could reach her she was out of my door and gone. And there I stood, running my hands through my hair, tears in my eyes, wondering if I had just made the biggest mistake of my life.

Read part 2 here