#n he was like 'it is something that very well may happen and IS dangerous' n in my head i was like
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have been thinking about Until Dawn again -- do we ever like, fully understand what Josh had planned for Matt and Emily? Like, did he steal/hide her bag or something to get them out into the woods? Or was that just some kind of coincidence that played out like he hoped it would?
#N posts stuff#outside of that one 'did Josh do that deliberately?' uncertainty i do actually grasp the full implications of his plan#better than i think i did in high school.#(my brother has a playstation he lent to us so i'm finally playing it for myself instead of just watching no commentary vids lmao)#in that like. presuming he Did send Matt and Em out there deliberately then them + Mike and Jessica are on the side of like#Josh is putting them in the same circumstances Hannah and Beth were when they left the house - he's surrendering them to whatever#circumstance and danger that his sisters went through; i watched a couple of like vid essays on the game and someone said that#Jess and Mike in particular were 'spared' by Josh sending them out to the cabin but i don't think that's what Josh was doing#given the level of control he had over everything that happened all over that mountain then I have to assume the busted power#in that cabin was Deliberate and the path they took was very messy and ill-maintained in a way that can get them both Soaked#so to me the cabin is a deliberate exposing them to the elements in a way that may well could have killed hannah and beth#plus Josh did make up some of the 'maniac' lore BUT his parents were in a lengthy legal battle with someone who Did threaten the family#so he's also well-aware that That guy could have had something to do with Hannah+Beth's disappearance and again Josh is exposing#Matt and Mike and Emily and Ashley to that danger because they were the more outward 'antagonists' in the prank on Hannah#so his revenge there is more passive but arguably Way more dangerous than what Josh had set up in the house; because again#Josh had a Huge amount of control over what was going on in there and he kept an eye on everyone the whole time#He's basically the only threat on the field - he can account for the weather and outside threats etc. in a way he Doesn't do for anyone els#and even tho they don't know it JOSH knows that he's not going to physically Harm anyone inside the house. so they're ultimately Safer#his deliberately more Antagonistic 'revenge' on the others who seemed to have less to do with the prank is also kind of double edged#ie; for 1) Josh overall sees the whole thing as a net Positive for them - he was going to post it online w/ the intent of making#them all famous sensations; obviously he knows it's terrifying them deliberately in a real dire way but as a Whole it's supposed to be 'goo#and as for Why he scares them so thoroughly out of everyone i think it's mostly bc Josh does see Himself as culpable that night as well#dr. Hill has that line about how he doesn't know if it's like. worse to threaten someone or passively allow them to come to harm or whateve#so there's a lot of deep self-loathing about the fact that Josh couldn't/didn't do anything to help his sisters that night that he kind of#turns outwards against the other people who were also less Directly culpable in that same way (Sam tries to stop the prank#but fails; Ashley more passively went along with it than deliberately participated; Chris was also drunk + incapacitated)#so it's almost a collective 'WE fucked it up bc we didn't do Enough' kind of punishment hence the invocation of Hannah and Beth's#terror and uncertainty on that night -- We didn't do Enough and so this is what they suffered because of us in that way#but again; Josh had immense control over that house and he Knew everyone was Physically safe so even though he's Scaring them#he's also not putting them In Danger in the same way he does everyone else by shutting them out of the house + out in the snow
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do you believe me now? | 7
in which spencer reid and inexperienced!fem reader sleep together for the first time
series masterlist
18+ (smut) warnings/tags: loss of virginity, oral f/m receiving, so much praise, pain during sex, unprotected sex, cr**mp**, bit of overstim, soft dom spence, if u don't like that freak shit (love and intimacy) this is not for u, spencer is a nerd, they're both nerds actually and that factors in heavily, you may get more from this part by FIRST reading how they met in this bonus chapter a/n: thank you all for being patient, ilysm, this was the most laborious thing i've ever done for no reason and also this part changed so many times and is not what i expected it to be so pls go in with tempered expectations and keep in mind that this story is more about the characters and their specific relationship dynamic than just being porn. i truly have no idea how you guys will react to this but i sincerely hope you love it and them like i do<3 also it's twice as long as the other parts so feedback would be very very appreciated! again i love u all and enjoy the penultimate part!
Spencerâs lips are on yours, and you werenât expecting itâhell, you werenât expecting him to be in your apartment. After all, heâd wished you goodnight and walked out only a moment ago.
âSpencerâwhââÂ
But heâs insistent with his lips, kissing you bruisingly over and over like thereâs nectar on your tongue and heâs parched for you. Still, he has enough decency to not completely ignore you, exhaling a quick excuse over your flushed lips.Â
âI missed you.â
This time, though, you dodge his hungry kiss. Part of you thinks, as he watches you, eyes alight and breathing heavily, that he sort of likes your playing hard to get. Itâs not something you do very often, admittedly.Â
âWeâve been apart for like, maybe a minute.â
âI didnât even make it to the parking lot.â
Your face heats. Â
âWell you canât justâyou canât just walk in like that! And I thought you said we werenât supposed to mix fighting with pleasure.â
âThen start locking your door. And I thought you said we werenât fighting.â
You roll your eyes in response, though your heart is still pittering in your chest.Â
At least his hands move to your arms, stroking up and down relatively chastelyâalthough he has this way of making everything seem intimate. Especially when paired with those amber eyes of hisâglowing like a candlelight beacon in the window guiding you home. He speaks in low, appeasing tones and darts his tongue over his lips.Â
âI originally said itâs a bad idea for couples to sleep together after an argument. But you knowâmakeup sex is ubiquitous across culture and time because it works. Anger and arousal trigger a lot of the same hormones, specifically norepinephrine which is involved in feelings of longing andââ
âSpencer.â
âYou know what else?â He mutters in a way that feels dangerous. âIt tends to feel better than regular sex.â
That earns a shaky exhale from you. Whether from irritation or arousal is anyoneâs guessâprobably a combination of both.Â
âSo you came back to fuck me?â
Itâs probably evident to Spencer from your choice of language that this already isnât going exactly as heâd planned. He doesnât answer right awayâjust regards you, gaze bouncing between your two eyes like heâs trying to calculate your level of anger.Â
âIs that what we���re calling it now?â
You push him away and move to walk down the hall.Â
âMaybe your window of opportunity has passed.â
A warm hand wraps around your wrist in the dark of the hallway and he pulls you back until youâre falling against something tall and warm and lean. The smell of polished amber and sandalwood overwhelms your senses.Â
âWhatâs wrong, angel? What happened in the minute I was gone to change your mind?â His voice is scratchy like a favorite record. Itâs the voice he could hold you captive with. The one you have a very difficult time saying no to.Â
âI donât know,â you mutter, unintentionally leaning back against him. âWhat happened to change yours?â
His response comes pressed against your ear, half-lost in your hair.Â
âYouâre upset that I changed my mind. I thought you wanted this, honey.â
âI do,â you admit, letting your head fall back against his shoulder and bringing his arm to wrap around you. âAnd if you hadnât walked out earlier I wouldâve done it. But⌠Iâm tired of us doing everything on your timeline. You just⌠you expect me to be amenable to what you want, constantly.â His nose and lips press into your shoulder.Â
âWhat do you mean?â
âLike⌠Iâve been begging you to sleep with me for I donât even know how long. And you keep changing your mind, and I feel like youâre being really confusing about it. Obviously you donât have to sleep with me, you never did, but I just feel kind of⌠jerked around. And you did it again tonight.â
A beat of silence.Â
âI understand your frustration,â he appeases, securing both his arms around you. You cling weakly to his wrist, to his warmth, like heâs a tether in a storm. âWould you prefer to wait until you initiate it?â
âNo. Yes! I donât know,â you huff, disentangling yourself from his arms and continuing toward your bedroom. âNow Iâm annoyed at you again.â
He follows you right through the door.Â
âJust tell me what to do! I donât want to be annoying.â
âI canât. Iâm being unreasonable.â You flick on your adjoining bathroom light and examine yourself in the mirror. Yeesh. The eye makeup situation is abysmal after all the crying that has taken place over the course of the evening.Â
âSo choose to be reasonable and tell me what you want from me. Iâll give it to you.â
You frown at your reflection, pushing your hair back and rubbing at some excess mascara.Â
âNo, youâre not understanding me. Iâm not choosing to be unreasonable. My thought process regarding the situation is inherently unreasonable and thereâs nothing I can do about it because itâs just the way I feel.â
âThe feeling being that Iâve been too domineering over how our sexual relationship has unfolded?â
Spencer watches you in the bathroom mirror, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed as you tip some makeup remover onto a reusable cotton pad. You try not to check him out as you nod, but itâs impossibleâwith his sleeves rolled up to show defined forearms cradled in capable hands, and his hair all messy.Â
When he pushes off the wall you freeze, unsure of his next moveâuntil heâs gently spinning you around and taking the bottle and cloth from your hands.Â
âMaybe it would help,â he begins, soft as he focuses on the new task, carefully bringing the round to your right eye so he can remove the bleeding mascara. You allow your eyes to flutter shut. âIf I remind you why Iâve been so hesitant.â
âBecause you hate giving me joy.â
He laughs, nothing more than one huff from his nose.Â
âYouâre spoiled and we both know it.â
Point taken, as he gently wipes your makeup away for you. Your silence is his cue to continue.Â
âEverything I said about worrying that you would regret choosing me is true. It was especially true when I thought you felt lukewarm toward me. And all of that confusing stuff I said in the phone is true tooâhaving sex for the first time is incredibly intimate and weird and sometimes scary. If youâre not 100% sure about your partner, or if you think your feelings are unrequited, itâs hard to be completely comfortable in such a vulnerable situation and your likelihood of getting hurt or having regrets skyrockets. I know that from experience. I wanted better for you than what I got. Still, I know it was wrong to project my feelings about the significance of sex onto you. In that regard, youâre right. I was being domineering, and I guess⌠I guess to an extent Iâm still deflecting. I shouldnât be trying to pretend like itâs about you when in reality I mostly just didnât want to get hurt again. I didnât want to go through that again, and thatâs okay, but I shouldnât have made you feel like it was something you could have changed.â
You try to process that.Â
âGo through what?â You whisper hoarsely. Something about having him at such close range while he takes such care with you feels whisper-y.Â
âSleeping with someone who didnât love me back.â
Your reply is small.Â
âOh. Right.â
How could anyone not love him back?
Spencerâs reply is simple and kind, without a hint of, obviously you dumb bitchâwhich is pretty much what youâre thinking to yourself.Â
âDoes that make sense, lovely? Do you understand why I wanted to wait?â
He lets you ponder for a while in comfortable-enough silence as he finishes removing your eye makeup with a characteristically gentle hand. When you open your eyes, he looks genuinely content, screwing the lid back on the bottle as if heâs got an eternity to wait for your answer.Â
âYeah. That part makes sense. But why did you seem so⌠I donât know, like, wishy-washy about it?â
Spencerâs eyes dart up to meet yours, brows slightly raised. Then a small laugh bubbles up from somewhere inside him.Â
âBecause Iâm obsessed with you. I thought about you like that constantly. I still do.â
Your breath catches at the casual admission.Â
âOh.â
Spencer hums, setting the bottle down before tenderly thumbing away some excess mascara that he must have missed from under your eye.Â
âYou didnât think it was easy for me, did you?â
âWell⌠kind of,â you admit, tracking his eyes until they meet yours.Â
âNot sleeping with you has been among the hardest things Iâve ever done. Especially when you started begging me. That first time, when I picked you up from Penelopeâs and you asked me why we hadnât had sex yetâŚâ
He trails off, still rubbing at your cheek as he loses himself in thought.Â
Eventually, you grow impatient, prompting, âwhat?â
âItâs not a nice thought.â
âWell, you have to tell me now,â you insist.Â
He half smiles, thumb straying to your lips.Â
âIt was just⌠you had no idea what you were talking about, and you were ready to throw a tantrum in my living room until I gave you what you thought you wanted. Part of me was imagining bending you over the couch right then, since you thought you were so ready.â
It feels like someone has snipped the pulley that keeps your stomach in place.Â
âSpencer,â you splutter, convinced your cheek is tangibly heating under his touch as your head reels at the revelation that he could have such a deeply dirty and mildly sinister mind.Â
âI told you it wasnât nice.â
You swallow.Â
âIs that⌠is that still what you want?â
His brows flicker again and he tucks hair behind your ear.Â
âTo bend you over my couch? No.â
Your face warms even more and you turn to leave the bathroom, sick of his teasing.Â
âOkay, goodniââ
âHold on.â Spencer catches you by your waist and pulls you back into him for the second time tonight. A dangerous smile pulls at the corners of his mouth. âI know what you meant. And no, I donât want to bend you over my couch.â He laughs, slipping a hand under your shirt to rub your back. âYou know what I want. Iâm more interested in learning what you want.â
âI wantâŚâ Your eyes dance between his, and your heart flutters against the confines of your chest as you realize what youâve wanted for so long is finally yours for the taking. âI want to stop talking about it.â
His expression neutralizes and you know itâs probably intentional to stop whatever feelings you assume him to be having color your decision.Â
âOh?â
âI just think weâve talked about it enough.â
Before he can say another word, or ask you another question, you kiss him with such passion thereâs no way he can doubt how much you want this.Â
Only a moment passes before he allows himself to lean into it, cupping your face between reverent hands and taking control of the pace of the kiss, slowing it down until you can hardly breathe. Your little noise of want has him quickening the process, pressing against you until youâre walking backward out of the bathroom. Itâs like the first crack in a dam. After that, everything becomes inevitable.Â
Your knees hit the back of the bed and you sit down hard on the mattress, smiling up at him. You skim the front of his thighs with your palms as he smooths your hair.
Spencer groans, leaning down and kissing you til youâre on your back.Â
âDonât make that face.â
An affronted huff from you breaks the kiss up and he pulls back to study your expression.Â
âWhat do you mean donât make that face? I was just smiling at you.â
âI know you were. And you have such a pretty smile it makes me feel guilty aboutâŚÂ defiling you.â
Your brows flicker up and your mouth drops open with an affronted scoff.
âWatch yourself. Iâll defile you.â
âYou already have,â he admits with a half-laugh as he kisses you again. âMy mind was never this dirty before we met.â
âHm. Tell me you like my smile.â
He pauses and then chuckles dryly against your mouth.Â
âI love your smile. Youâre gorgeous. Any more demands?â
Pleased, you shake your head and pull him closer, wrapping your legs around his waist.Â
âNot currently.â
âReally?â he murmurs, trailing kisses over your cheek and down your jaw, âIâd do just about anything you asked me right now. You donât want to take advantage of that?â
The sensation of his lips just below your ear threatens all rational thought in your brain, but you manage a reply with only a slight delay and a hint of a waver coloring your tone.Â
âI shouldnât have to demand things. You should just know to do them.â
His kisses drag lower, warm and unhurried and youâre trying not to let your hyper-sensitivity from going a week completely untouched showâbut you doubt he misses the way your breath catches, or the barely audible squeaks, or the arch of your back or the tightening grip on his shirt.Â
âWell, for future referenceââ he nips at a sensitive spot and you gasp quietly, even as you tilt your head to offer him more access. More room to bite, if he so chooses. ââI happen to enjoy it when you make demands of me. Especially when those demands entail letting me call you pretty.â
âIâve never not let you call me pretty before,â you huff. Itâs a touchy subject, and Spencer can probably sense your hackles rising, but he has you right where he wants you and so he pushes anyway.Â
âNo. But you never believe me. Weâve had this conversation. You always act like Iâm walking you to the gallows when I compliment you.âÂ
Itâs hard to make a defense when heâs leaning his weight onto one arm so he can unbutton your jeans, when heâs looking down at you with sparkling onyx and scorched-earth eyes like youâre something to be consumed. But not violently, noâardently. Like fruit heavy on the vine. Like youâre a religious rite to the devout and deluded. A sacrament.
But itâs not a blind passion. Spencer knows you; every inch of you and every loose thread on your soul begging to be pulled. He knows you and he still wants you like this. To be perfectly honest, youâd never thought youâd feel comfortable handing yourself over to someone like thisâvulnerable and all your layers of armor shed. Never in your life would you have thought you could trust a person so implicitly that youâd hand them a knife and show them exactly where to press, that youâd say, I know once you open me and you see me youâll not want to change a thing.
You adore him. Cosmically. Enormously. In every dimension. Heâs lodged so deep in your heart you have no choice but to love him eternally.Â
Itâs deep in the midst of all these very profound revelations that you realize Spencer has stalled with your zipper undone. His hand has strayed to your hip, to sweetly push your shirt up and trace love letters into warmed and downy skin with his thumb.Â
âI just wish you could see yourself how I see you,â he says softly, the weight of the truth a strain on his vocal cords.Â
Sometimes, he is so kind itâs like a punch to your stomach. Youâve never been quite as kind as him. And nobodyâs ever been as kind to you as he is. Youâve done nothing to deserve his kindness, but you know he needs a place for it, and youâre here with open arms.Â
He studies you a moment longer, swallowing as his eyes trail over your face and lower. You want to reach out and brush strands of caramel hair out of his face, but he seems to be thinking so hard youâre hesitant to distract him.Â
âIâve never told you this, because I know youâd just shoot it down, but⌠you are genuinely the most beautiful girl Iâve ever met in my life.â
Something twinges in the depths of your stomachâthe darker shades who live there and exist solely to whisper not enough not enough not enough to you every minute of every day.Â
But theyâre simply not a match for the softness you find when you do reach out for his hair, or the way he looks at you. Spencer loosely wraps his fingers around your wristânot a cuff, but an affectionate hold.Â
âDo you believe me?â
Thereâs so much earnest hope in his voice it almost jars you. He so badly wants you to understand how feels about youâheâs been trying to tell you for months and all you know how to do is refute his praise and insist on your worthlessness.Â
Ever since Spencer, you donât see the faces on magazine covers or in superhero movies, no matter how mathematically flawless they are. Nobody gets close to being as beautiful as he is in your eyes. Heâs in an entirely different echelon, and despite how you feel about yourself, you have to accept that he might feel the same about you.Â
âI do,â you say, equally soft, and 100% honest. You believe that he believes it, and thatâs enough. Itâs all that matters.Â
The shallow knit of his brow loosens. His lips ease into a suggestion of a smile. But itâs most visible in his eyesâthe way smoldering coals reignite, melting the amber glass of his irises until theyâre molten.Â
The way he kisses you then, youâd think youâd lassoed the moon and pulled it down from the sky for him. But apparently all it takes to make him incandescently, contagiously happy, is to accept a compliment.
Thereâs a renewed sense of urgency on his breath as he kisses you deeply and quick enough your heart is racing. It only goes faster when he remembers his previous task and begins tugging your jeans down, but he doesnât even bother to pull them past your knees before his hand is creeping up your thigh. Goosebumps race each other across your body as you try to remember what it feels likeâwhat he feels like. But you canât, even as his thumb fans over your inner thigh and pushes it open, gently encouraging you to give him more access to you.Â
âYouâre not wasting any time,â you breathe against him while he traces the edge of your underwear.
âDo you want me to slow down?â
Judging by the way the tips of his fingers only barely shy away from the fabric, he really wants the answer to be no. But you know in his searching gaze that heâd never push you.Â
âNo, itâs fine. As long as we⌠donât go this fast the whole time.â
âWe wonât.â The hasty words are of lower priority than the next kiss he plants to your swollen lips. âWe wonât. I just missed you so much.â
âYeah?â You giggle airily as he drags his fingers over your clit through the material, trying to ignore the way it makes your head spin.Â
âYes. Yeah.â
Youâre not sure youâve ever seen him like this, soâŚÂ desperate for you, as he drops his lips to your neck and presses barely-there kisses everywhere he knows youâre sensitive. Just the feeling of his breath against your skin has you shivering. His hand between your legs only brushes your most nerve-dense spot, but a few touches in and youâre already wound up, like if Spencer doesnât give you more soon youâll burst. And not in the good way.Â
When he finally commits to actually kissing your neck, you squeak, warmth emanating from that spot just below your jaw all the way to your toes. The frantic energy of earlier is slowly melting away, and he loses focus with his hand, as it begins straying wider, stroking your hip, your inner thigh, your stomach. Itâs like your nerve endings are on overdrive, delivering twice as much feedback to your brain as they normally would. Each touch feels like heâs conducting electricity over your body, like youâre a plasma ball. Heâd probably like that analogyâyou, a core of alternating voltage, and him, the conductor, tracing a path and giving all those electrons an easy release. If you werenât so distracted, youâd tell Spencer you found a way to work Nikola Tesla into your mutual sex life, and heâd probably propose on the spot.Â
But that electricity is building fastâeven more so when he drags his lips down just above your collarbone. Your breath hitches, simultaneously trying to crane your neck to give him more room, and curl into him so as to escape the stimulation. Finally he pulls away, and losing the softness of his mouth while the air feels so cold against the places heâd kissed almost hurts.Â
âYouâre a mess,â he chuckles affectionately, raising his hand to brush hair away from your face before stroking the heated high point of your cheek. âWhat am I going to do with you?â
Itâs teasing, but so low and gentle and honeyed it swirls your stomach.Â
âWhatever you want,â you admit quietly. Itâs a shy confession more than it is a salacious flirtation because he already has you. And you want nothing more than for him to act on that in any way he so pleases. Whatever he does, it will be careful, and kind, and because he loves you. You know that no matter how he takes you apartâheâll put you back together again.Â
âI donât know if IÂ can. Youâre all jumpy.â
God, he has the prettiest smileâeven when itâs twisted with sarcasm and a thin veneer of guilt, like he knows he shouldnât be teasing and just canât help himself.Â
âIâm not,â you defend, face heating further. âIâm not nervous. I donât know what it is.â
That sticky sweet tone is back, pooling in his eyes and dripping all over you like nectar as he languidly looks you over.Â
âI didnât say you were nervous. Just a little bit jumpy.â
Itâs not accusatoryâheâs simply stating a fact. Easy, gentle, designed to soothe.Â
You shrug helplessly and chew on your lip, unsure of how he wants you to respond. Itâs definitely true that excited as you are, youâre slightly on edge. You feel taut as a string on a guitar, tense and waiting to be yanked at any second.Â
His expression is serene, and his thoughts inscrutable as he continues lavishing you with his eyes, down to where heâs lying over you and back up. His lips part, but he doesnât speak for a moment as he formulates his words.Â
âCan we try something? Thereâs this tantric exercise that might help you relax.â
Your brows draw earnestly and you nod up at him, not requiring any convincing even though you have no idea what heâs talking about.Â
Spencer directs you to sit up, and you doâkicking your jeans all the way off so you can sit criss-cross with your hands braced on your ankles.Â
Heâs next to you on the bed, at a slight angle, one of your knees in his lap. You blink at him.Â
âNow what?â
âNow you give me one of your hands,â he says, tone tinted with a hint of an amused smile, as if your impatience is funny to him. Of course it probably is.Â
Frowning only a little, you unlock your left arm and hold it out for him, watching curiously as he takes your one hand between his and flips it palm-up.Â
âDid you know,â Spencer begins, voice low and confidential, âthat the fingertips are the second most sensitive part of the human body?â
âWhatâs the first?â
âLips,â he murmurs, eyes fixed on your hand where heâs brushing the tips of your fingers light enough it almost tickles. âTheyâre both incredibly important for keeping you alive, which is why theyâre one and two. But youâll be particularly sensitive anywhere youâre vulnerable.â His words are trailing off as he brushes his thumb over your palm and to the delicate skin of your wrist. âLike here.â
His knuckles skim up your forearm, to the crook of your elbow.Â
âAnd especially here.â
Youâre fascinated as he traces back down the length of your arm and over your inner-wrist, feather light. Then up once more, with the blunted edges of his nails, and your breath catches. Youâve never noticed how sensitive such an innocuous part of your body could be, but it has your stomach flippingâmore so when he looses a breathy laugh. âYou know, some people are actually able to reach orgasm just by light stimulation to this area.â
Your response is just as airyâyou donât recognize your voice when it comes out like that, hanging in the pitch black between you.Â
âReally?âÂ
An affirmative hum from him, as he lifts your hand and places an intentional kiss over your pulse at the bend of your wrist. Your chest aches and heat is pooling in your stomach as his gently trails them up the delicate skin of your arm. Maybe you should be embarrassed by the reaction youâre havingâafter all, itâs just your arm. But he treats every part of you like it warrants love and attention and intimacy. Even the parts you typically ignore. Certainly parts you never considered to be sexually or romantically relevant. Itâs dizzying. Itâs like magic.Â
âArms up,â Spencer finally directs, just as sweetly as heâs doing everything else, and helps you tug your shirt over your head. Every brush of fabric, every seam against your skin registers more than it normally would. Everything is heightened, and despite your state of undress youâre still warm. âYour neck is really sensitive, too. Itâs the most commonly acknowledged erogenous zone.â
Erogenous zone. Of course this all comes back to biology.Â
âTilt your head for me, honey.â
Utterly entranced and useless to not abide by him, you do so. Spencer brushes your hair over your shoulder, and if the slip of it down your back werenât enough, the graze of his fingertips against the nape of your neck has you shivering.Â
The warmth of him at your throat feels completely brand new, despite having already had his lips there only minutes before. But now they ghost over your skin with a kind of novelty, and your own lips part in silent pleasure, head lolling to allow him greater access.
âLie back.â
Without hesitation (but perhaps a bit sluggishly in your stupor) you obey, sliding down until youâre propped up only by pillows once more. Spencer takes his place propped above you once more, thighs slotted with yours as he quickly picks up where he left off.Â
The sweet kisses are perfect and feel so much better than youâd ever thought to notice beforeâbut at the same time your core aches and thereâs that pressure building again thatâs starting to get to you.Â
âSpencer,â you try, and it comes out hoarse but you donât care at all. âMore.â
âYou want me to leave marks?âÂ
And the offer is so tempting youâll wait a few more minutes to ask for what you really need, nodding semi-frantically and âmhmâ-ing desperately.Â
As he gently latches onto a spot that will require concealer later but feels fantastic for now, one of his hands slips down your side, just barely letting his nails skim, and your back actually arches. Itâs a shocking amount of stimulation for being nowhere near any sexual hotspots. That tiny caught breath dissolves as his fingers continue down just as lightly over your hip and thigh. Your muscles tense as you chase and run away from the feeling. Itâs ridiculous.
Thereâs no point in trying to keep your eyes open nowâthey grow heavy and you let them fall shut as he sucks another love bite to your throat.Â
âFeels good, doesnât it? Itâs kind of weird.â He says, voicing your thoughts as he eventually decides the mark will be sufficiently dark.Â
âYeah,â you agree, lacking all eloquence as he caresses every sensitive place you didnât know you had and your hips writhe minutely in a little desperate dance of your own creation.Â
âMost people arenât aware of the potential of the erogenous zones that arenât actual sex organs. They donât pay attention to them. You know what else is an interesting function of erotic stimulation to areas that arenât directly involved in reproduction?â
âHm,â you hum as his hand skims to your back. You lean into it and he promptly undoes your bra with a single handâa skill youâre not even sure you have.Â
âIt releases not quite as much oxytocin as an orgasm but more than sexual pleasure alone. So youâre less tense before sex than you usually would be, and youâre primed to build more trust and feel more connected with your partner during.â
God, heâs a nerd. And itâs so, so hot.Â
You roll over on your back again and look up at him through half-lidded eyes. The corner of his mouth flickers as he takes in your expression, before trailing downward, following the path his fingertips make over your skin as they tug the straps over your shoulders. Trying to stop him, to be shy, would be a pointless venture. Heâs seen you like this and you want him to see you again.Â
A shaky exhale of his own brings a little smile to your face as he pulls your bra away and observes the newly bared skin with a hunger that you can feel.Â
âI missed you,â he murmurs, eyes cast pointedly down and thumb brushing over the side of your right breast.Â
âYou mentioned.â
âIâm not allowed to say it again?â He teases, leaning down to kiss you soft. Your lips curve against his.Â
âYou can say it as many times as you want.â
Spencer hums, finally thumbing over your breastâs sensitive peak. It sends a chill down your back and seeing as youâre already worked up to the point of near insanity, the pleasure from such a simple touch is much stronger than it would be otherwise.Â
âGood. Because I missed you a lot.â
After that, he doesnât waste much timeâonly toying with your flesh for another minute as he kisses you before his hand is skimming down your abdomen and dipping below the waistband of your underwear.Â
âPlease,â you whisper, tilting your hips toward him when he doesnât move to touch you anymore.Â
âPlease what?â
âSpencer, donât.â
He smiles at this, pressing another kiss to the corner of your mouth as his hand travels lower. Fingers slip between wet folds and he begins making the lightest of circles over your clit.Â
âYouâve probably been waiting long enough, huh? I should be nicer.â
Your answer is a breathy almost-whine as you seek more friction against his hand.Â
âYeah.â
âYeah,â he agrees, pressing down harder. The sensation sends sparks down to your toes and you attempt to clamp your legs shut around his wrist. âThese need to stay open,â Spencer chuckles, âor else I canât help you.â
âSorry.â
âDonât apologize.â The words are a sweet sing-song against your cheek as he kisses you there, before hooking his fingers into the fabric of your underwear and pulling down. You try to help wiggle out of them as best you can, gasping when he tosses them away and immediately returns his hand between your legs. He dips his head down, tongue lathing over your breast, and teases you with the tip of one finger circling around your entrance.Â
âI needââ
âShh. Let me worry about it.â
With that, heâs dipping his ring and middle fingers just barely inside of you to the first knuckle, then back out, before pushing a bit deeper, and repeating the cycle until theyâre as far as theyâll go. When he slowly starts fucking you with them, still mouthing sweetly at your breast, youâre ready to melt.Â
The room is quiet except for your breathy mewls, the lewd, wet sound of his fingers inside of you, and the blood rushing in your ears. Soon your breast pops from between his lips and he finds somewhere else to leave his mark. Spencer is turning you into a work of art, with his fingers, with his mouth. You donât mind at all. Youâd let him sign his name, if he couldâbut you doubt heâd let you get his name tattooed.Â
Soon you stop fighting the perpetual tug of your lids down and let them flutter shut, loosing a freer moan as he brushes over that sweet spot inside you. Even when heâd told you how to find it over the phone, it wasnât the same. It wasnât like thisâmaddening enough to have your hips twisting again and that hot bed of coals in your tummy sparking.Â
âSpencer,â you warn, leg twitching as he stokes the fire beyond the point where you can passively enjoy it. Either heâs got to slow down or heâs got to let you burn all the way up. You practically jump when you feel his tongue flick over your clitâyou hadnât even been aware of his shifting positions. Maybe youâre more out of it than youâd previously thought. Your eyes shoot open and he does it again. âOh, fuck.â
The words are simple, quiet, and apparently thatâs not enough. Before you can even process the sensation of the tip of his tongue on you heâs latching onto your clit, suckling in a way that has your vision momentarily going out. You cry out and kick involuntarily, hips jumping up, but he captures your leg and presses you down into the mattress so no matter how much you squirm and squeak you canât get away.Â
âFuckfuckfuck, Spencer I waâahâsnât readyâoh my god.â
He remembers his fingers deep inside you and begins rutting them and you hiss, inhaling sharply through your teeth before letting it all out in a tremulous moan. The orgasm is building up so quickly it almost feels like an attack on your poor body as you try to process it all to no avail. Every sound you make is a vulnerable mess of pleasure and pain, a clear fear of surrendering to something inevitable. Of course, it doesnât really hurt at all. As usual, heâs blindsided you. Found you unprepared. You rake your fingers through Spencerâs hair, continuing on with your shaky moans that sound half-worried.Â
âOh, please.â Really, youâre just pleading to be put out of your misery. Itâs in moments like this, as the black is creeping in around the edges of your vision and your thoughts become threads in the tangle of an existence knotting in on itself with no discernible end or beginning in your mind until everything is completely abstract, that youâre reminded why the French refer to orgasm as the little death. Â
Your fingers lace tight enough in the wilds of his hair to pull, and he groans against you, and those vibrations are your undoing. You succumb to the dark momentarily but he continues a loving assault of gentle kisses to your clitâcareful enough so as to be inoffensive even after the euphoria abates and youâre hypersensitive, still relishing soft strands of hair between your knuckles.Â
Youâre breathing hard as you blink your vision back, looking down at him as he looks up at you from his place between your legs and rubs the top of your thigh.
âI wasnât ready,â you pant, lips flashing into a tired smile that doesnât hold a candle to his own livelier one.Â
âTook it like a champ.â
If you werenât already so warm his sarcastic comment would inspire more heat in the apples of your cheeks.Â
âDr. Spencer Reid using sports idioms?â You smile as he climbs back up your body.Â
âItâs unreasonably sexy that you said idiom and not simile.â He kisses you, grin mirroring yours, and you donât complain about the slick still on his lips. âAnd look at that. Not afraid to kiss me when I taste like you anymore.â
âI remember what you said,â you whisper, eyes bouncing between his, glowing amber pools in the low light. The words echo in your head from the first time heâd gone down on you and youâd been hesitant to taste yourself.Â
One day, Iâll make you come just like that again, and then Iâm going to fuck you, and youâre really going to want me to kiss you then, angel.
âSo do I,â he points out needlessly. âEerily prophetic, hm?â
âI think you just like going down on me,â you laugh.Â
Without the light on, his smile is just as brilliant as usual. Â
âYou might be right about that.â
Another interlude of quiet begins, but you donât mind it. Taking this slow, as desperate as youâve been for it, feels nice. Easy. Waves of burning need ebb and flow, but for now, it feels nice to be bathed in his candlelight gaze, know youâre loved, and nothing else.Â
âWhat next?â You whisper after a long moment, lifting your hand to trace the line of his jaw. He leans into it slightly, lips brushing your palm.Â
âThatâs up to you, angel. Whatâs going to make you feel most comfortable?âÂ
Your bottom lip rolls between your teeth as you think and he tracks the movement, corner of his mouth twitching fondly.Â
âIt might help if you werenât fully clothed.â
âI think we could probably do something about that.â
He pecks the tip of your nose playfully and then heâs pushing off the bed. Your brow wrinkles as you follow suit only partially, sitting up with your legs folded under you and pulling the sheets over your body to combat the chill and the vulnerability of being completely naked.Â
âOh, my god. You had your shoes on that whole time?â
âI got distracted,â Spencer defends, almost tripping over himself in his hurry to slip the loafers off.Â
You clutch the sheet to your chest, watching the adorable way he pushes his hair out of his face as he rushes. Heâs so clearly excitedâit shows in the flush of his cheek and his even worse than usual coordination.Â
âBut on my bed?â
âIâm sorry,â he says without seeming very apologetic, leaning down to catch your chin between his thumb and forefinger and pressing his lips to yours. âIâll pay to have your comforter dry cleaned. Iâll buy you a new one. I donât care.â
âHow chivalrous.â
âIÂ am,â he insists against your lips, shaped by what is surely a boyish smirk.Â
Unsurprisingly, you get lost in the kiss, dropping the sheet to hang onto his shoulders. Spencer takes advantage of the once-more revealed skin, rubbing your thigh with slow passes in a way that has you all lit up again already. It doesnât help that his tie is skimming right over the recess between your folded thighs as he leans over your seated form, kissing you deeper as the moments pass.Â
âYouâre distracting me now,â you scold, but your voice is quiet and smiley as your noses brush.Â
âDo you want to help me with my clothes?â
You nod, heart hatching like a cocoon and already slipping a finger into the knot of his tie so you can tug perhaps not gently enough. He chuckles, bracing himself with his fists on either side of your lap as you pull and yank until the fabric comes loose and you slip it from around his neck, flinging it blindly for dramatic effect. Then he slowly draws back to his full height, until youâre about eye-level with his chest. His gaze fixes on you, feverish and intent as he finds the buckle of his belt without looking. The slide of leather on leather, the jingle of the metal has the hairs on the back of your neck rising and you fight a chill as he pins you with his stareâfeeling rather powerless as he towers over you, still essentially fully clothed while youâre completely naked.Â
You probably shouldnât be as thrilled by it as you are.Â
Spencer tosses the belt on the floor and watches on, utterly charmed as you rise to your knees. His hands find your waist, steadying you as you begin unbuttoning his shirt with slow, careful fingers.Â
âSee?â You murmur bashfully. âHelping.â
His voice is equally as soft.Â
âVery helpful. Thank you.â
The tension in the quiet room gets to be too much and you have to focus hard on the task at hand, failing to bite back a twisty smile. For once, he keeps his stupid perfect mouth shut and lets you push the fabric of his open shirt from his shoulders in humid silence.Â
Your fingers skate down his torso and you watch the muscles tense. You wonder if he notices the way he pulls you slightly closer or if itâs subconscious as you both track the path of your hands.Â
âYour button is on the wrong side,â you note, voice wavering slightly, once your fingers stall at the waistband of his pants.
Spencer chuckles. You feel silly.Â
âMen and womenâs clothing tend to have the buttons on different sides, if thatâs what you mean.â
âOh.â A beat of silence, before the words come pouring out. âIâm sorry, I donât know why I said that. Iâm still a little bit nervous, I think.â
âThatâs okay,â Spencer assures you, hands gliding up and down the soft lines of your waist. âItâs okay that youâre nervous. But Iâm going to take really good care of you, okay?â
You nod, not looking away from the exposed skin of his torso.Â
âAnd if at any point you need to take a break or stop, youâll tell me.â
âI will, but⌠I donât need to stop right now.â
âThen you can go as slow as you want.â
You swallow and take a moment to gather yourself before continuing on undoing his pants. With his assistance, you pull them down, and with them his boxers tug an inch or two lower, exposing a subtle v-shape before it disappears beneath the waistband. The fabric is obviously tented. A ball of nervous anticipation spins faster in your stomach, drawing all the heat in your body down between your legs. Heâs pretty everywhere. Youâd nearly forgotten.Â
Spencerâs stomach tenses under your light touch as you drag your fingers down, down, just to the waistband. Itâs then that you look up at him for permission to continue, and find his eyes already on you, heated and intense.Â
âGo ahead, honey.â
Again you find yourself quite excited to touch him, but you start cautiously, simply letting your hand fall over the shape of him through the fabric. Even that has his chest rising and falling at a slightly quickened rate, and one of his hands finds your unoccupied one, twining them together. That small gesture inspires you to bolden your explorations, becoming more insistent in the way you palm at him. He feels big, which is a concern of yours. But you try not to let that intimidate you. Â
Already heâs quite hard, you suspect from going down on you earlier (which is flattering as much as it embarrasses you) and your fingers graze a small wet patch of fabric. You fixate on the shaky little breath he releases as you push down his boxers with new fervor, and his cock springs up.Â
Heâs still perfect.Â
You smear beads of precum down his tip, and he sighs, letting his head fall against yours as you both watch. A few coquettish pumps and heâs humming, kissing your face and dragging his lips down your neck where he makes a home for himself. Apparently the sight of your hand wrapped around him had been too much to bear.Â
âSo good. Missed this.â
âItâs just my hand,â you whisper, a little insecure that heâs maybe playing it up for your benefit.Â
âItâs you.â
His voice is so breathy, you sort of have to believe him.Â
âCan IâŚ?â
Too nervous to voice what you really mean, you trail off, but it apparently doesnât matter to Spencer. He lifts his head like heâs in a stupor but youâve said something urgent.Â
âAnything you want. You can do whatever you want.â
âOkay. UmâŚâ
You let go of his hand (and his dick). Spencer automatically rotates to accommodate you as you end up on your knees on the wooden floor in front of him.Â
âThis is what you want?â He breathes, already pushing his fingers through your hair and gathering it back as you look up at him and nod.Â
Very quickly you have him back in your hand, trying to remember what you learned from the few times youâve done this. You start perhaps a bit softer, less eager to prove yourself than you have in the pastâsimply dragging him over your tongue before enveloping his tip in your mouth, and releasing with a pop. Despite being overtly, explicitly, and undeniably sexual, thereâs something almost chaste about the way you handle him. Itâs a (dirty) expression of love, and you think he understands that as he rubs at your cheek affectionately.Â
Eventually, however, you get too excited, and you take him into your mouth in earnest, bobbing your head slowly and seeing how much of him you can take without gagging.Â
Spencer makes the prettiest noisesâtheyâre breathy, and not ostentatious, but heâs got such a nice speaking voice itâs like his gasps are bars in a song. You whine around him, wriggling your hips in a rather pathetic display, and then all too quickly heâs tugging your hair so you canât keep him in your mouth.Â
âWhat?â You ask, closer to pouting than youâd care to admit and voice slightly hoarse. âYou said I could do anything I want.â
âNot if youâre that good at it. Come here.â
He helps you up and catches you in a deep, messy kiss before youâve fully regained your footing, swaying against him, but he holds you fast, pulling away slow like strings of honey trail between your mouths.Â
Spencerâs eyes are fixed on yours, lips parted in a sort of wonder before he glances down to your own mouth, wiping the shine from your bottom lip. Any moment youâre expecting him to say something, to tell you youâre beautiful or perfect or that heâs in love with youâbut instead he just meets your eyes again, that same wonder-struck look on his pretty face. A tiny, breathy laugh forces itself from his chest like youâre a genuine miracle.Â
You feel so observedâseen in a way youâve never been seen, looked at closer than anyone has ever looked at you before. And he still looks at you like youâre the human embodiment of love, the closest mortal manifestation of the divine, Galatea come down from her marble pedestal. The way he looks at you has your heart pounding and your breathing hastened. Adoration has never been something so physical, so tangible, ever before in your life. Your blood hums at the frequency of his electromagnetic fieldâan energetic aura that surrounds each person and can be detected from several feet away, as heâd explained it to you. It originates from the heart and if you spend enough time close to  someone, syncs up the beating of your most vital organ with theirs until itâs a perfect match. Maybe thatâs why, almost as quickly as your heart had begun to pound, it slows again, and you feel any reservation flush from your body like a fever.Â
âOkay,â you breathe, cataloguing every angle and curve of his face to store with all the rest, all the moments that feel important. Of course, youâll never remember them like he does yours. But youâll be damned if you donât try your hardest.Â
âOkay?â Spencer asks. He understands the confirmation for what it is, and searches for signs of hesitation on your face while rubbing reassuring circles into your hip. You nod resolutely.Â
As he lays you down on your bed, it feels like youâre entering some kind of altered state. Everything is muted and glowing with a watercolor aura in the dark and you really only care about the man on top of you and the way moonlight dances on his skin and the way he smells like smoky amber and rain. He makes sure the pillows are fluffed under you, before sweeping your hair from beneath your shoulders into a corona around your head. All the while his eyes are so soft on you, just like his hands, and his lips when he leans down to touch them to yours.Â
One of said hands finds its way to your jaw, trailing down over your neck and collarbone, before settling over your breast where he swipes a thumb over your nipple, lightly, slowly, several times.Â
Once again youâre struck with the odd feeling, even with his hand on you like this, that the situation isnât sexual in the way youâd anticipated. Itâs not pornographic, or even very dirty. Everything Spencer does, even as his hand sneaks down between your legs, he does because he loves you.Â
âOne more like this,â he mutters against your jaw after a moment.Â
âWhy?â
Your impatience yields a smile you can only feel against your skin.Â
âJust want you relaxed and feeling good. Thatâs all.â
When you assent, his fingers are already slowly pushing inside you.Â
It seems youâve entered some sort of time warp as well, because you reach a gentle peak in what feels like record time, aided by his easy murmurings and saccharine praise.
âPerfect. That was perfect,â Spencer says with a kiss to your shoulder as he slides his fingers from you and you feel yourself literally dripping onto the sheets. âCan I ask you something before we get carried away?â
âMhm,â you hum, sweet and compliant as pleasure dulls your inhibitions for the second time tonight and your head lolls into the pillows.Â
âBaby,â he croons, voice soft as worn paper as your lids flutter and lashes brush febrile cheeks, thumbing over the heated skin. âNeed you a little more alert, sweet girl.â
ââMÂ trying,â you whine, though itâs half self-effacing laugh. Spencer chuckles too as you shake your head and take a deep breath, trying to reinvigorate yourself. âOkay. Go.â
âWell⌠we donât have any protection.â Before you can groan, loudly, he hurries on. âAnd thatâs⌠Iâm okay with that, if itâs what you still want. I trust you. But there will come⌠a moment of reckoning. And I need to know where I should⌠reckon. So you donât end up surprised.â
Now youâre really laughingâa giggly mess beneath him as your arms loop over his shoulders.Â
âStop it,â he whines, pressing his nose to your cheek as you turn your head in an effort to not snort at your boyfriend to his face. âThat was for your benefit, you know. You get squeamish.â
âIâm sorry, I just canât take you seriously when you refer to it as reckoning.â
âFine. Iâll rephrase. When I come, you essentially have two options. Inside, or on your stomach. Tell me where you want it.â
Your breath catches and your stomach does that tripping-over-itself thing again.Â
âUmâŚâ
Another fond half laugh, at your expense, is pressed against your skin. Itâs enough to prompt you into answeringâhe doesnât have to say anything to make his point about your being squeamish.Â
âInside,â you mutter, shy as you attempt to bring him closer so he wonât be able to look at you quite so closely. You wonder if heâs remembering the conversation youâd had over the phone last weekâbefore heâd accidentally kind of broken up with youâabout this very subject. You certainly are.Â
âOkay. I want you to have everything that you want.â A few kisses to your neck later, between nips, he speaks again. âJust need to hear that you want this one more time.â
âI want this,â you repeat, obedient and honest, plain and simple. âNow, please.â
Spencer responds by first kissing you, firm and loving. It soothes you, and he punctuates it with a kiss to your cheek, before heâs reaching down and guiding himself between your legs. You feel surprisingly calm, more overcome with love and the light pleasure rolling down your back as he drags himself over your clit than you are by nerves. Still, you pointedly hold his gaze, not looking down in case you psych yourself out. He slots himself in place, tip resting against your entrance.Â
âRemember, if you need to stop at any pointââ
âI remember,â you cut him off hurriedly.Â
Okay. So perhaps youâre still slightly nervous.Â
He watches you, sympathetic though youâre not sure what for.Â
âI need you as relaxed as possible, okay? I want this to be easy on you.â
You take a moment, scanning your whole body for tense muscles. When you feel sufficiently relaxed, you offer Spencer a small nod, and at that, he begins pushing into you ever so slightly.Â
At first, it just feels foreign. Heâs going so slowly, so carefully, youâre not sure heâs moving at allâuntil he finds resistance and the odd full feeling changes to a hint of burning stretch. Your hips jump and your breath catches, and Spencer stops immediately, relieving the pressure with a tiny shift in position.Â
âItâs gonna hurt,â you realize, eyes darting between his like he might be able to tell you otherwise. Youâd always been aware of the possibility, but you were holding out hope that youâd be one of those people who didnât experience any pain their first time.Â
âJust for a minute. Then itâll feel good, angel.â
You swallow and nod. At the end of the day, you trust him completely. You trust him enough to let him hurt you.Â
âSuper deep breaths for me.â
He watches intently as you follow his directions, taking several deep breaths in succession, before he begins pushing into you once more. The pressure builds and builds until he pushes past that point of resistance, and itâs like heâs breaking you in two.Â
âAh,â you gasp, abs twisting as your body tries to escape the sensation without any input from you.Â
âI know. I know, baby, that was the hardest part. Breathe.â
He drops his thumb to your clit, rubbing circles with light pressure to distract from the pain.
You nod, lips pressed together tight as the deep ache muddles your brain. Itâs an insistent pressure against something does not seem to want to budge. It burns and stretches and is laced with sour, flirtatious pleasure so that you can hardly tell what it is youâre feeling. Mostly, youâre dizzy and hot.
âRelax, just like that,â he strains, looking down. âMy good girl. Weâre almost there, baby.â
Cries spill unbidden from your mouth and your eyes shut as he continues to open you up deeper, until finally, finally, his hips settle into the cradle of yours.Â
Spencer sighs a curse under his breath, so quiet you donât think it was meant for you.Â
Heâs inside of you. Itâs bizarre.Â
You whimper, and he snaps out of whatever revery heâd been in.Â
âYou okay? How does that feel?â
You take a shuddering breath, closing your eyes and trying to clear your head to no availâyour thoughts are like TV static.Â
âIâm good. I need⌠I need a minute.â
âYou can have as much time as you need. Itâs a lot, huh?â
âYeah,â you admit, voice small and weak.Â
âI bet,â he agrees, peppering soft kisses all over your face. âBut youâre doing so well. Proud of you, brave girl. Youâre doing so well and weâre gonna make sure it feels good soon, okay? Whenever youâre ready.â
âWill you please kiss me again?â you whisper, and Spencerâs brow knits with concern.Â
âOf course, angel. Of course Iâll kiss you,â he says, and makes good on his promise with his lips on yours. It sweetens the ache. âIâll do whatever you want. You can have anything. Youâre so perfect.â
He kisses you again, just as lovingly, and soft, like youâre delicate. All the praise is only contributing to your lightheadedness, but you donât mind at all. It feels good.Â
âYou can⌠you can move.â
âOkay. Weâll go really slow, yeah?â
He waits for your nod before his hips are pulling back and you arch at the odd sensation. When he pushes back in, eyes carefully locked on yours the whole time, you keen slightly, frowning and brain shorting out as it tries and fails to process this new feeling.Â
âUh-huh. Youâre okay, I promise.â
At first it doesnât feel good. It mostly hurts. But slowly, the pain begins to abate as you acclimate to having him inside of you, and heâs careful the whole time.Â
âSpence?âÂ
âHm?â
He sounds concentrated on the task at handâyouâre entranced by the sight of him above you, the parted lips, the unkempt hair over the brow furrowed in pleasure and focus. But heâs never too busy for you.Â
âDoes it⌠umââ you pause to hold back a whineââwhat does it feel like for you?â
At this, he slows even further and chucklesâitâs a strained, slightly breathy sound.Â
âFor me?â
âMhm.â
âYou feel perfect, baby. You feel so fucking good.â
The slight fry in Spencerâs voice as he curses, which is a rare event in and of itself, flips your stomach, turns you on immensely. The idea that youâre giving him pleasure tooâitâs almost overwhelming. Thatâs when it starts feeling good.Â
âOhââ you squeak, jaw dropping and bucking your hips inadvertently as the first bolt of true pleasure shocks deep in your core. He hums.Â
âYeah, is that it, sweet girl?â
But you canât answer for a long moment. Your brain is melting as your legs lock around him.Â
âMmâitâsâit feelsâŚâ
âI know it does,â Spencer murmurs.
You whine and press your face into the curve of his shoulder as each thrust gently rocks your body. As the pace picks up bit by bit, you feel yourself clenching hard around him. His hips stutter and he hisses.Â
âAh. Canât do that, lovely.â
âWhat? Did I hurt you?â
He laughs breathily.Â
âNo, you didnât hurt me. You almost pushed me out. You have to relax.â
âSorry,â you whisper. ââM trying.â
âYou donât need to be sorry. I know youâre trying, baby, youâre being so good for me.â
Your nails skim his backâa small expression of a much larger desperation. Once heâs sure youâre relaxed around him, begins going faster.Â
Your gasps and soft moans come more often now as he finds a steady rhythm and it feels so different when heâs actually fucking you. It feels like heâs everywhere. Every time your hips meet you feel the sweet shock of it in your teeth, your toes, the back of your neck. In the best way, you feel consumed by him. Itâs not at all like youâd imagined, and itâs perfect.Â
âWait, Spencer,â you breathe, struggling to form the words. Immediately he stops again, lifting his head from your shoulder to examine your face.Â
âWhat is it?â
He sounds just as wrecked as you feel, panting and strained and it feels good to hear.Â
âI wanna watch.â
For a moment his eyes dart between yours like heâs trying to determine what you really meanâbut you said exactly what you meant. Then he laughs, a huff of air from his nose as he presses his head to yours and gives you a quick kiss.
Your toes curl as he readjusts his position, holding himself a little higher and resting your heads together so you can both look between your bodies.Â
âThere,â he murmurs as he slowly begins to withdraw again. âLike that?â
But you canât answer, because youâre too busy whimpering at the sight of him pushing into you. The feeling seems to increase tenfold as you watch it happen. Distantly you wonder how the fuck it fits.Â
âYeah,â you whisper. âLike that.â
Spencer takes this as a blessing to find a pace again, slower now as he seems to be just as enthralled by the sight as you are.Â
âGive me your leg,â he rasps after a few moments like that, and you donât know what he means exactly but you lift your right leg slightly only for him to press his hand to the back of your knee and push toward your chest, effectively opening you up and giving him more range of motion. It also enables him to fuck you even deeper. Again he slows, apparently savoring the feel of you yielding around him all the way down to the hilt.Â
Black spots dance in your eyes as he settles at your deepest pointânot pain, necessarily, just overwhelming sensation. Your jaw drops and you choke out a moan as he presses into recesses you didnât know you had, as he shows you a part that you might have gone the rest of your life without knowing existed. He stops there, like that. Everything stops there, like that. If the cars on the road below ceased to drive, if the airplanes froze in the sky, youâd not be the least bit surprised. Somehow, youâve unlocked a small eternity. Thereâs no sound but your joint heavy breathing and your heart pounding in your ears. The words just come bubbling up out of you in a little whine.Â
âI love you.â
Spencerâs breath pauses for a moment before heâs letting it all out at once, brushing his lips up the ridge of your nose before they settle on your forehead in what seems like a permanent kiss. A few breaths in, you allow your eyes to flutter shut. Your heart rate slows down a touch, and you settle into the moment, never having been quite so content as you are like thisânever having felt quite so adored and safe.Â
âI love you,â he finally echoes, voice rasping, lips still pressed to your skin, still breathing against your hair. When he starts to move again, drawing back ever so slowly, you hiss softly. He raises his head from yours, and you look away from where heâs pulling out, meeting his eyes just in time for him to push back in, just as deep. They shine in the mostly-dark room and you moan unabashedly. Itâs a high-pitched, sweet thing, nothing that will have the neighbors complainingâbut so clearly true, from the depths of your soul, an expression of everything youâre feelingânot just the pleasure.Â
Although thatâs good, too, as Spencer shapes you to him again and again, the head of his cock kissing places nobodyâs ever been and places you hope nobody else will ever venture to. This is all you need. Him.Â
âJesus,â Spencer groans, eyes fixed on your face as he fucks you slowly. But you canât bring yourself to talk, too new to this kind of pleasure to find it anything other than mind-boggling and world altering. Your lips are still parted, allowing each sound to pass without filter. âListen to you, beautiful.â
When he stops again, just to look down and marvel at you, youâre conflicted. On the one hand, you can taste the pleasure on the back of your tongue and he keeps taking it away when itâs so close. But on the otherâyouâre just as overwhelmed as he said youâd be. Your body has never had to process this kind of sensory information before, and youâre exhausted, but itâs so good.Â
âSpencer,â you manage. He looks up, pupils blown and eyes lidded where theyâd normally be wide. âPlease donât stop.â
He swallows, spurred into action again as soon as you say it.Â
âGood?â
You nod and whine again as he picks up the pace bit by bit, remembering to push your leg back once more so he can get as deep as you need him.Â
âSo good,â you exhale at the top pitch of your voice. Your brows pinch and you release a fuller moan as Spencer finds a speed thatâs fast enough to constantly feel good no matter where he is. Youâre gasping for breath, back archingâand he finds a new angle, catching against the spot inside you that renders all those years of human evolution that gave you sentience and intelligence a waste. He chuckles airily at your series of series of affronted moans and halted gasps.Â
âRight there? That's a good spot, isnât it?â
âOh, goâfuck, fuck!â
It feels so good it almost hurts, and your eyes are stinging to prove it. Your legs clamp tighter around him and you realize thereâs a very lewd wet sound and you canât believe thatâs you.Â
âSpencer, youâreâoh my god, I love you,â you whine, and it sounds like youâre pleading for your life. At this makes his own sound of pleasure, and hastens his messy circles on your clit as if in reward.Â
But itâs too much all combined.Â
Your hand claps to your mouth to obscure the loud, licentious moan that comes outâbut Spencer immediately moves his hand from between your legs to grab your wrist and pin it gently to the bed, intertwining your fingers.Â
âDonât do that. Let me hear.â
You nod, and he lets go of your hand to return his fingers to your clit. If possible you get wetter around his cockâyou can feel yourself gushing.Â
âFuck, Iâm gonna cum,â you whine as if pained.Â
âYeah? Gonna finally let me feel you cumming, angel?â
He has a filthy mouth when he wants to. The words hit like high voltage to your core and the very pit of your stomach. You canât even respond beyond a desperate sob.Â
âShow me, baby. Iâm right here. Let go.â
You cum around his cock with a broken cry and itâs like a purge of every drop of angst youâd felt over the past week or soâhell, itâs a purge of all the insecurities that had bubbled to the surface since you started dating him. None of it matters anymore. How could it matter when you have him? When you have this?
The orgasm washes you out like a tidal wave, taking everything with it. Itâs strong, and itâs so good, so intense, your body is overwrought with sensation and itâs too much even though itâs perfect. Your brain is drawing a blank as it tries to react to the feeling, and itâs like every button on the damn panel has been hit.Â
âFuck, Iâm close,â Spencer grits, and you feel it in the way he adjusts his position, shifting as he grips at the edge of the mattress for leverage and the thrusts become messier, needier. You gasp as his other hand tangles in your hair, turning your head to ghost your lips over his forearm. Itâs not entirely surprising when his own lips find your shoulderâbut the feeling of him finding his release just as his teeth sink into your skin does come as quite a shock. It doesnât hurt, and youâre sure thereâs no skin broken, but itâs an undeniable fact that he has grounded himself in the throes of passion by biting down on you.
Inside you, he feels hot. Searing, almost, as his spend tries to fill space that doesnât exist. There is absolutely no room for anything else inside of you. Stars dance in your eyes at the overstimulation, but long after heâs finished heâs still fucking into youâalbeit much slower and with far less technique. Spencer moans like a two bit whore, like heâs reached pain to a point of ecstasy, and to you itâs as good, as special as the singing of the planets. If heâs as sensitive as you are now, itâs no small feat for him to keep going on like this. Itâs a testament to how much he doesnât want it to be over. The pleasure is carrying him away, but youâre beginning to feel how soft you must be and how if he continues on like this you may bruise like an overripe peach.Â
âSpencer,â you manage, skating your hand up and down his back in what you hope are soothing lines. âBaby.â
He whines as his lips detach from your shoulder, but his hips finally slow to a stop, nestled inside you.Â
âJesus, fuck, I'm sorry,â he breathes, opting now to bury his face in your neck (with significantly less biting this time).
Youâre still reeling, toes still curled, still struggling to breathe as your head spins and spins and spins. His chest pushes against yours with every heaving breath, hot and heavy on your skin, and thatâs the only sign heâs still alive until his hand eventually reanimates in your hair, scratching your head tenderly.Â
For a span of minutes, you stay like thatâsilent, twined together like caducean serpents. His weight on top of you is perfect. This, the lack of differentiation between your body and his, is perfect. You donât know where he ends and you begin and you donât need to. Itâs a blissful moment.Â
âHey.â
Spencerâs voice is hoarse when he finally speaks, lifting his head to look at you with flushed cheeks and messy hair and sparkly eyes.Â
âHi.â
He smiles.Â
âYouâre so pretty.â
âYou too,â you murmur, moving your hand from his back and pressing your thumb into the hollow of his cheek. His eyes map the curves of your face as he pushes your surely askew hair back.Â
âHow do you feel?â
It takes you a moment to seriously consider his question, scanning your body for any undue pains, but for the moment, you find none, beyond a dull aching throb that you can manage.Â
âGood. Tired.â
You wince at the uncomfortable feeling of him pulling out. Spencer hums sympathetically and presses a sticky kiss to your lips which makes it a little better, though you canât ignore how uncomfortable all the previously pleasant wetness has become between your legs.Â
âHereâstay here, Iâll get a wash cloth andââ
âItâs fine,â you insist, holding on even as he tries to roll off of you. âI just need⌠will you stay here for a little bit?â
âOf course,â he promises, now pressed close to your side and propped up on an elbow, âwhatever you want.â
You lavish in his gaze, warm like a spotlight, as he strokes your cheek and plays with your hair. Very quickly youâre lulled into a doze, eyes fluttering shut. Minutes stretch. You feel drunk on waking dreams, and perfectly at peace. Safe.Â
âAngel girl,â he christens you fondly. More than anything, itâs an observation, so lovely it sinks into your skin like a balm, soothing every tired muscle and little mark heâd made. Even half-asleep, it makes you smile.Â
âYouâre an angel,â you slur, reaching blindly for him, and he chuckles, catching your wrist and helpfully settling your hand on his cheek.Â
âI thought you were asleep.â
You hum, âmm-mm,â looking up at him with just as much adoration as he has for you. Those cuddle hormones must be kicking in because soon youâre attempting to pull him back on top of you. He doesnât quite comply, probably for fear of crushing youârather he settles next to you, gathering you in his arms.Â
Silence blankets the two of you, but itâs not unpleasant as you just watch each other with barely-there smiles curling your mouths. This kind of intimacy still manages to give you butterflies, even after everything else youâve done. This kind of satisfaction, reverie in the sound of each otherâs blood flowing and lungs filling. Setting aside words because you donât need conversation as a pretense for wanting to be around each other anymore. You donât need an excuse to look at him like this. You donât need words any more than you need clothes. Itâs enough to just be.Â
âI love you,â he says, a soft reminder, and entirely redundant with the way heâd already been looking at you, touching you.Â
âI know. I love you too.â
The smile flickers brighter on his face.Â
âAnd thank you.â
Your eyes narrow minutely as you consider what he could possibly be thanking you for.Â
âFor what?â
âFor loving me. And trusting me. ItâsâŚâ your heart squeezes as you realizes tears are pooling in his eyes. He takes a moment and clears his throat. Itâs incredibly endearing. âIt means a lot to me. You mean a lot to me.â
You look down, thumbing at the sheets where youâve hoisted them over your bodies.Â
âYou do realize how lame we are if we have sex and both immediately start crying, right?â
At this he laughs loudly but not loud enough to pop the little bubble youâre in, and you look up just in time to catch the brilliance of his smile, the way it changes his whole face and he becomes superhuman in his beauty, the lines that form by his eyes and the way they narrow and crystalline tears bead his lashes like precious gems.Â
âDonât cry,â he requests gently, hypocritically as your own eyes sting. The way his smile fades is like the sun setting. Gorgeous, like everything else he does. âYouâve cried so much, honey. Please donât cry.â
You sniffle, gathering yourself.Â
âIâm not. That would be pathetic.â
Spender leans forward to kiss you tenderly a few more times. Ordinarily youâd worry about coming across as clingy when you hold onto him so closely and so insistently like this, but for now you donât care. Neither does he, it seems, as he seems unable to get you close enough. Eventually, you end up curled against him, head tucked under his chin and dozing on and off as he traces shapes into your skin.Â
âWhat are you writing?â You mumble some time later, cheek smushed against his shoulder. He only responds with a soft hm, like he was lost deep in thought. You clarify, âit feels like you were writing something.â
âShe Walks in Beauty.â
Your lips pull into a sleepy smile.Â
âThe Lord Byron poem?â
The first time youâd met Spencer, heâd inadvertently caused your painstakingly annotated copy of Lord Byronâs works to go flying all over a cafe, and then kindly helped clean up the pages and reorder them for you in record time. Among the poems had been She Walks in Beauty.Â
âYeah. I was trying to figure out when exactly I fell in love with you, and as someone who is deeply skeptical about love at first sight, Iâm a little embarrassed to admit that I keep coming back to our first conversation. I mean, I believe in genetic compatibility, and how that contributes to attraction and what we think of as chemistry, butââ
âWait, what about our first conversation did it?â Your cheeks ache from smiling as you speak. âAs I recall I was being a bitch and I was covered in coffee.â
He laughs dreamily, still tracing letters over the small of your back. You wonder what part of the poem heâs at now.Â
âYeah, mean to me and covered in coffee is pretty much exactly my type. But I think it was actually the annotations on that copy of Lord Byronâs works. They were so insightful, and personal, Iâit kind of took my breath away, and I know I shouldnât have read them all but I couldnât stop. You were compelling, and charming, and funny and wildly intelligent and beautiful and⌠and I didnât stand a chance.â
Everything aches. Itâs a good ache. Despite being seconds from tearing up all over again, you snort. He never told you about that first day.
âYou thought me writing âsister fuckerâ in all caps every time he mentioned Augusta was charming?â
âOh, obscenely so. But now that Iâm looking back, I feel like⌠I feel like I canât remember not being in love with you. I mean, I remember when I realized I was, and that was later. But it was like I met you, and then I was just⌠waiting for you to catch up.â
You grab his hand and interlace your fingers, watching the way the ambient nighttime light from the window and the bathroom dips them half in color.Â
âWe were pretty much on the same page. I was debating courthouse versus small intimate ceremony as soon as you left.â
You watch him watching your joined hands, features soft and relaxed, fiddling with your fingers absentmindedly as he speaks.Â
âDefinitely small intimate ceremony. I have too many friends who would kill me if they werenât invited to the wedding.â
You giggle and pretend the thought doesnât give you butterflies. You imagine a ring on your finger, the one heâs got between his own. Marriage had never been something youâd considered. Not when you had no reason to. It seemed like something for other people. But maybe one day, it will be for you, too.Â
âDid you know Lord Byron had a daughter who is regarded by many as the first computer programmer? She wrote the first algorithm for a theoretical machine that was so complex it couldnât be built with the technology available at the time. It was called an Analytical Engine.â
He sounds almost wistful as he gives you the utterly unprompted, but still welcome, abridged version of her life. The description is ringing a bellâbut you canât quite place her, sleepy as you are. Â
âWhat was her name?â
âAda Lovelace. She was exceptionally gifted. The odds of parent and child being so extraordinary in their respective fields are incalculable, but from a purely theoretical perspective, negligible. I mean, theyâre both massive historical figureheads. Thatâs extremely uncommon.â
You adore it when he goes off on these tangentsâthe passion that stains his voice, the ardor that grips him until he has no choice but to tell you exactly whatâs got him so excited. You could listen to him talk for hours. It means heâs here with you, and he wants you to love what he loves.Â
Since he met you, thatâs all Spencer has wantedâfor you to love what he loves.Â
You want the same.Â
âPretty name,â you murmur, eyes fluttering shut. âTell me more.âÂ
-
part eight
#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid#spencer reid x y/n#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds#spencer reid fic#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x fem!reader#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fanfic
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Time Traveller AU part 7
Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here. Part 5 is here. Part 6 is here. Time Traveller au masterlist is here. Check out my MASTERLIST for more!
Part 8 is here!
"Gather the troops and have them warn the public. All the infantries will be stationed here and here. The archers and cavalary-" Salauddin was sending orders to his generals. As soon as he was informed of Baldwin coming, you knew he had only limited time to make a game plan.
You didnt understand why Baldwin would come all the way here for a war. He wouldnt leave Jerusalem unarmed this way, so either he's bring half of his army while the other half protects his kingdom from invaders- which would put him at a great disadvantage against Salauddin. Or he's bringing all of his men and that means Jerusalem is practically up for grabs.
No. He wouldnt leave Jerusalem unarmed like that, so that means he's inadequately prepared for the war?
No. Baldwin's too smart. If he won against Salauddin at just 16 years, then he's definitely coming up with a plan. And it scares you to not know what he has in mind.
You looked at Salauddin who had just finished instructing his generals, as they left. He was stressed, you could see that. War. Its not a small thing. There are no true winners when there's blood shed on either side. While Salauddin does have the advantage of fighting in his home ground, that is also his disadvantage. At the end of it, his people- his Egypt will suffer.
"Y/n." Your eyes meet. "I need you to stay inside the palace. I will have guards assigned to you. If they tell you to go somewhere, follow them."
"What? No. I'm coming with."
"Have you lost your mind?"
You ignored his insult. "If Baldwin is coming for a war-" "You're gonna talk him out of it?" "I mean, its not a bad plan but I was gonna offer you to use me as a bargaining chip? That way you could avoid blood shed." You wouldn't offer to put your life in danger but since your time machine is still not ready, you need to avoid a war.
"No." He gave you a stern look. "I dont want you anywhere near him or his men. You will stay here. Listen to me for once."
"But I-"
"Y/n." He warned. You sighed before nodding. Well I could always just go out when he leaves, just like last time.
Almost as if he had read your mind, he made you follow him to a room that had no windows or any other exits besides the one door that was made of solid wood and had guards stationed outside.
"This is the safest room, Y/n. It is impenetrable." Oh no, you cant stay here.
"I think you're overreacting a bit-"
"Overreacting? Your fiance is coming over to start a war because of your crazy brother-in-law who you underestimated because you said that he's just a tool. I think I'm reacting very appropriately." He shut you up.
"I want Isabella."
"No."
"Please Salauddin, I need to keep her safe too-"
"No."
"This may be the last wish you ever grant me, so can you just agree-"
"You think I'm going to die?!" Salauddin stared at you in disbelief.
"I... I didnt say that." You tried to think of a lie. "I mean, maybe this might be the last time you see me... alive? Who knows when the angel of death pays you a visit? If we look at the statistics, between you, me and Baldwin, at least one of us going to die-"
"Stop talking." He gritted out, "Fine."
-
"Princess." Isabella wailed as soon as she entered. You let her hug you. "I missed you too, Isabella." You smiled wiping away her tears.
"I- I heard rumors of a war! Is it- his majesty coming?" The girl sniffled. You nodded.
"Its true. A war is going to happen... unless I do something about it." She blinked in confusion. "Huh?"
You held her hands and gave her your most pleading eyes. Its time for manipulation.
"I need you to get me out of here." "Why?" "Because I need to talk to my future husband out of war."
Her eyes widened. "B-but its too dangerous for you to go outside, princess!"
You sighed. "If I cant even protect people from unnecessary pain and bloodshed, then what good am I as a queen?" Yes, time for some heart breaking lines about self sacrifice. "I would rather risk my life than the lives of those who have their families waiting for them at home. I would happily fall on my own sword if it means my subjects wont have to. If I cant prevent suffering of the very people who would bleed for me, then I have no right to be the queen of Jerusalem."
-
Half an hour later, Isabella had knocked on the door for the guards to let her out.
"Sultan Salauddin has forbidden-"
"Princess Y/n from leaving. Not me. I'm her lady in waiting and the princess needs me to get her belongings so that she can write her will."
"We can have it fetched-"
"You? A common man she has no relations with- wants to touch her stuff? I dont think so." Isabelle glared at them through her niqaab (all of your maids had followed your dress code in Egypt). She didnt wait for an answer as she began walking away before a man appeared by her side. It was one of Salauddin's guards.
"What?" She snapped at him, continuing to walk.
"They sent me to walk with you and bring you back safely." He said before grinning at her. "I thought you'd be happy to see your habeebo."
"Habeebo?" She asked, reaching your room.
He caught her wrist and turned her around, gazing at her veiled face with affection. "You cant still be mad at me for leaving the other night- I had duties."
"What right do I have to be mad at you?" Isabella kept her face down, conveying she was still very much mad.
"Habeebo's habibti- you have all rights over me. You're the only woman for me." Habeebo said as he placed a hand over his heart.
Isabelle finally giggled, freeing her wrist from his grasps. "Stop... someone could walk in on us." She warned.
"So? I'm not afraid. I can do anything for love!"
"Anything?"
"Anything." He assured her.
"Then go fetch me some cold water while I pack the princesse's belongings. Hurry now, I'll be waiting for you here." Habeebo all but smiled before walking towards the kitchen, leaving Isabella alone in your room.
As soon as she was sure he was gone, she removed her veil and quickly changed her chaddar with yours.
"Thanks Isabella." You muttered as you slipped on your chaddar. Yes, you had left Isabella in the room upstairs and pretended to be her to slip out of there. She had told you about her crush Habeebo who you had also fooled into leaving you here, and youre sure that if he were to go back upstairs and find Isabella instead of you, he'd protect her. Surely.
Sneaking out of the palace wasnt a hard feat by now. What was hard was trying to figure out what way to go to find Baldwin or Salauddin, with all the people panicking as they were being constantly warned by guards about Baldwin's arrival.
You decided to go through the market and head towards the madarrasa, though you doubt Abbas is anywhere done with the parts you gave him to make. You had given a week's deadline but only because you needed him to hurry up, not because he could actually make them in such little time.
The streets were packed, shops were getting closed and people were trying to rush home to safety. You were nearing the madarrasa when you were pulled to the side in an alley.
"Y/n!" Abbas exclaimed. "Finally, I found you." You raised a brow and he grinned. "Your things are ready."
"Already?" You were in disbelief. How did he-
He puffed his chest. "Of course. I had a deadline and with the war being announced, I'm glad I made haste!" You felt hope again. If the parts are ready, all you need to do is assemble them and you can leave this timeline for once and for all, and if Baldwin and Salauddin do end up fighting each other, everything works out! You're sure that Salauddin would win by playing to his strengths, and because eventually Guy will fuck up and betray Baldwin and cause him to die. Then another crusade will happen and Salauddin will take over Jerusalem! Everyone wins.
"Well? Hand it over."
"I dont have it with me right now! I took the parts home to work on them. Lets go." You trailed behind him, the market still bustling as the air became more tensed. They're kingdom is about to be attacked and they have little to no time to prepare for it.
Soon, you reached his home. It was a cozy place, made of mud. The beige walls added onto the coolness. He lead you inside, crossing the patio. Abbas told you to wait there while he went inside a room to get your parts. While waiting, your eyes landed on a cage in the corner that had 5 doves.
"Here it is." Abbas returned with a wooden box and gave it to you.
Opening it, you saw the designs you had given him. You took the parts out and examined them. They weren't top notch, but they'll make do.
"Thank you." You handed him a pouch of gold coins. He pocketed it before raising his brows at you. "So... will you finally tell me what this is for?"
You looked up at him before taking out your time machine. Might as well assemble it here and leave as soon as possible. "I would but I'm afraid it'll go over your head." He frowned at your words before grumbling angrily under his breath before going to the doves to give them seed. Good, he should be distracted while you put these parts in.
It didnt take more than a few minutes for you to place them in. All you had to do was to put in the last key, turn it on and set the date-
"Y/n." You looked up at Abbas, not understanding his horrified expression. What's wrong? You followed his gaze and looked behind you, and there it was-
A shadow standing at the doorway of the patio.
You squinted your eyes before your heart dropped at the realisation.
Black robes, hood over the head, geared up.
Assassin.
"This is the wrong house." Abbas said with a trembling voice.
The assassin stepped forward into the light, while you and Abbas took a few steps back.
"What- what do you want?" The assassin didnt answer him, his eyes fixed on you. This is- this is not an Ismaili. They wouldnt attack alone, and especially not so soon, and not when a war hangs over their head.
The assassin took another step forward, this time you grabbed the time machine and held it closely. This made the dark figure tilt his head at you.
"Get behind me." You moved behind Abbas. "Get out of my house- this is not the time. Evacuate!" Abbas warned the guy but he didnt stop staring at you.
As soon as he took another step, Abbas grabbed a wooden stick from the side and ran towards him, only for him to be flipped over his shoulder and slammed to the ground. You took this as a sign to run but the assassin was faster, grabbing you by the chaddar as it ripped off you. Your eyes widened as he grabbed you by the shoulder and yanked you back and your immediate reaction was to slap him, but he caught your wrist and pushed you back inside the patio. Abbas got up and tried to punch him, but he was knocked down back on his back in a second.
You ran, but didnt make it more than a few steps before you got tackled to the ground. You struggled to break free but the assassin had his arms wrapped around your neck, putting you in a chokehold.
Knowing Abbas couldnt come to your rescue, you clawed at the assassins hands, flailed about trying to break free from under him. But he had overpowered you, putting immense pressure until you started seeing black dots.
Just at the last moment, your eyes caught the sight of the dove cage and instinctively, you yanked the cage, hoping to hit the assassin in the head with it, but all you managed was to tip it over, the latch holding it close dropped.
And in the next moment, the doves flew out and went straight for the assassin. You wouldnt say they were attacking him, but the moment he saw them flying in his direction, he raised his hands to bat them away, which only caused him to get scratched-
You didnt stick around to find out if they clawed his face off, springing to your feet as you ran inside a room, hoping to find a window to escape.
You spot the window, quickly opening the wooden frame to leap out. Only the moment you have one foot out, you're pulled back inside and thrown against the wall.
The assassin is back, his body language conveying he's more pissed now than before.
You cant outrun him. You take a fighting stance. You know very well that you cant beat him either, but it works well to at least make him doubt that.
Maybe you could bribe him?
"What do you want?" You ask him, your fists raised. He tilted his head at your attempt to look ominous.
You glared at him. "You let me and my friend go, and I can assure you I can give you enough gold to keep you out of work forever. I am..." you pause before using your last card. "I am King Baldwin's fiance, future queen of Jerusalem. Let me go, and I'll give you anything you want."
He took another step forward and you knew you were backed into a corner so you punched him, only he caught your fist before it was anywhere near his face.
He stared at you, tightening his hold on your wrist.
"Please dont hurt me." You gulped before raising your other hand to punch him, but he caught it too. Now both of your hands were in one of his while he used the other to grab your throat and push you against the wall.
"Oh fuc-" He squeezed a pressure point on your neck until you passed out.
-
Salauddin was on his horse at the front of his army, waiting at the gates of his kingdom for Baldwin. His generals had informed him that they had placed the respective troops posted according to his plan. Everyone waited with baited breath for his command. They're ready to protect their sultan, ready to sacrifice their lives to protect their kingdom.
Salauddin heard them before he saw them.
The heavy jingle of metal armour, the marching of the horses and then he saw their cross flags. He gave a nod to his men, signalling to be prepared.
They're coming.
In all honesty, Salauddin was expecting Baldwin's army to not make it through the hot desert, since they rarely ever leave Jerusalem.
But it was still a surprise when he saw the actual size of his army.
It wasnt that much. Thought he anticipated it, after all Baldwin wouldnt have left his kingdom without some men, but now this means that Baldwin is not relying on numbers.
He's relying on strategy. And its hard to predict Baldwin's moves.
Salauddin's mouth turned into a grim line. What was he planning?
The templars lead the army to the gates of Egypt. The Muslims had their weapons ready to be drawn. Salauddin watched the Christians Knights halt.
Do they attack now?
Baldwin emerged from the masses on his horse, sporting his iron mask despite not needing it anymore. Salauddin also rode his horse to meet him halfway, knowing his generals dont appreciate him leaving.
Their horses stopped a few feet apart from each other. Everything was silent apart from the sound of warm air whooshing through the desert.
Baldwin raised his hand. Salauddin heart skipped a beat. He's going to signal them to attack-
"Salam alaikum!" Baldwin greeted with a wave.
Salauddin gave a nod. "Walaikum asalam."
Baldwin tilted his head. "Why so tense, Sal? Not happy to see me?"
"I dont like uninvited guests." He replied. Baldwin chuckled. "Of course. But we're friends-"
"Why are you here, Baldwin?"
Baldwin stared at him. No king appreciates being interrupted.
"I'm here to meet my fiancee."
Salauddin stared at him unamused. "You left the Holy Land to meet your fiancee who was going to return home soon anyways?"
Baldwin shrugged. "I missed her."
"Baldwin."
The young king sighed. "I know I should've informed you before coming but I really do want to see Y/n. I mean no harm, Salauddin." He raised his hands in surrender. "I just thought it would be a nice surprise for her. Ever since she cured me, I realised I hadnt seen the world that much, so what better location than Egypt?"
Salauddin stared at him, before his gaze fell on his army.
"Come on, Salauddin. Where's Y/n?" Baldwin asked with a goofy smile.
Salauddin's brows furrowed before he sighed. "In my palace." He nodded at his men to open the gates as he lead Baldwin in. But not before whispering to his second in command to surround the kingdom from all perimeters and be on high alert. Things can always go south.
Baldwin smirked looking at the size of Salauddin's army. "Aww, you didnt have to bring them for my warm welcome." Salauddin ignored him, knowing very well that Baldwin knew how it looked when a king comes unannounced at another king's door.
-
They soon arrived at the palace, welcomed by servants and maids who were looking at Baldwin in awe. They had heard rumors of his beauty, and when he removed his mask, they realised how huge of an understatement it was. And the fact that this young king was the one to defeat their sultan at just 16 years age, it definitely added to the charm.
But Baldwin wasnt blind to the furious gazes of his soldiers either. He just ignored them, which was easy since his mind was occupied by thoughts of you. Y/n. My princess. My angel.
What surprised Salauddin was that Baldwin hadnt come alone. No, Guy was here too which only confused him more. If Baldwin brought Guy along, then who did he leave to take care of Jerusalem? Sibylla and Guy's son was still too young to be a heir.
He did remember your theory about Guy being the one to hire the assassins to ambush you in the desert. If Guy came here despite his failed attempts to get rid of his enemies, then he's either incredibly stupid or he's well assured that he'll get away with everything.
Salauddin wont let him. He'll make Guy pay.
"I hate to rush you Salauddin, I know Muslims are knows for their hospitality but can you just lead me to Y/n's room? She is a sight for sore eyes." Baldwin requested sweetly, making Salauddin roll his eyes. He signalled a servant to bring you down.
Guy looked disgusted to be in the presence of so many Muslims, but the moment he caught sight of any maids passing by, he would be eyeing them like a piece of meat. A maid came by holding drinks in a tray. When she offered it to Baldwin and then Guy, the latter startled the poor girl by purposely touching her wrist with his grubby paws.
Salauddin gripped the armrest tightly. If he wasnt Baldwin's brother-in-law, Salauddin would've plucked his eyes out and had him whipped in public to make an example out of scum like him.
"So, when did you leave your camp outside Jerusalem? I was expecting to see you there on my way here, but there were new troops of yours instead." Baldwin asked, sipping the cool drink.
"I came here with Y/n. I had some errands that required my attention." Salauddin didnt bring up the ambush, watching both him and Guy to gauge their reactions. Did they know?
"Went on any new conquests recently?" Salauddin decided to make small talk as they waited for you. He hopes you're not taking time to get ready to meet Baldwin. He'd rather you come up covered in a chaddar when Guy is here.
Instead of allowing Baldwin to answer, Guy cut him off. "Of course! We are the noble warriors, the Chosen Ones! God wants us to conquer as much as possible, for the sake of his-"
"How dare you talk to me?" Salauddin silenced him. "I'm talking to your king. He may allow it but you're in my kingdom now. You will abide by the rules or so help me, your head will be on a spike for the crows to shit on." Guy's eyes widened and his jaw fell open. No one had threatened him like that, at least not since he married Sibylla.
Baldwin barely suppressed a smile and when Guy looked at him for help, he only shrugged. "You should listen to him. We are his guests, after all."
The servant returned with the special guards he had assigned to protect you, all looking scared.
"S-sultan... the princess-" Baldwin and Salauddin's gaze sharpened at your mention. The poor servant gulped.
"The princess is gone."
There was deafening silence. The servant had his head bowed, along with the guards, all too afraid of the wrath they're going to face.
"Gone? Gone where?" Salauddin spat as he walked upto them.
"I- I dont know-" Salauddin grabbed the guard by the collar and shook him. "I left her in a room with no windows, a room guarded by the 6 of the most skilled men. Where did she go?!"
The guard's head only lowered further. "Sultan, we only opened the door to let princess Y/n's maid in and out. B-but- but when we opened the door, the maid was waiting there instead of the princess!"
"Which maid? Where is she?!" Salauddin roared.
The guard nodded at his men who pushed a young girl forward roughly. She fell on her knees, crying pitifully. He immediately recognised her.
Isabella.
"Where's the princess?" Salauddin questioned her, only to be answered in hiccups and tears. A vein on his forehead popped. He doesnt have time for this. Who knows where you are? If you're safe-
"Isabella." Baldwin called out gently, kneeling in front of her. She sniffled and bowed her head. "Isabella, look at me." She took panicked breaths before lifting her eyes to meet his kind ones, not a a grain of anger in them.
"You know where princess Y/n is?" He asked, pushing her hair back over her ear. She shook her head, hiccuping though she wasnt bawling her heart now.
"Use your words, Isabella. Tell me what happened." Enchanted by his gentleness, she spilled, told him all about how you made her take your place so that you could go and stop you from starting a war with the sultan.
Salauddin watched the interaction closely, trying to figure out if Isabella was lying. He did note Baldwin's behabiour throughout this entire interrogation as well. For someone whose future wife is missing, Baldwin is surprisingly calm. Then again, he's rarely ever seen Baldwin lose his temper.
"Where did she go?" Baldwin questioned her once again.
"I- I dont know, your majesty. She never told me!" Isabella cried out.
Baldwin nodded before standing up, his brows furrowed as rubbed his chin with his thumb and index finger.
"If Y/n was going out to stop me and she never reached the gates, then it means... she's still here." Baldwin said after some deep thought. He looked at Salauddin. "Your men have surrounded the kingdoms, havent they?"
Salauddin nodded before ordering his men to find you.
"Search every house, every place. No one gets in or out of the kingdom!" He yelled at them, watching them leave. He felt Baldwin stand beside him and out of the corner of his eye, he saw his face wasn't... too concerned.
"You know, for someone whose fiancee is missing, you're surprisingly calm." Salauddin was both stating his observation, and accusing him too. Did Baldwin know where you were?
Baldwin simply smiled, his dimples showing. "I know you will find her."
"And why is that?"
"Because if I dont have Y/n in my arms by today, then I will burn your Egypt to the ground."
-
The Templar Knights kicked down doors, rattled the poor citizens and took great glee in destroying their belongings, using you as an excuse to "search thoroughly". Salauddin's army was also rigorously working to find you, interrogating everyone for any clues on you. Then again, no one had really seen how you looked like. You were just another woman covered in a chaddar and niqaabi among a whole city of them. It would be like finding needle in a hay stack and Salauddin wasnt about to allow anyone to rip off the niqaabs off his Muslim women. He wont allow such a transgression.
Fortunately, Baldwin agreed. After all, why would you be hiding from him? You dont have a reason to, right? But still, he had to find you. So he was walking through the streets of Egypt himself to look for you.
Salauddin had joined him, and not just because he wanted to ensure the safety of his folks but also to stop Guy from provoking Baldwin by feeding him any lies.
That cretin was getting on his last nerves.
Salauddin pretended to be deaf as Guy harshly whispered to Baldwin that "How can a princess just vanish? Clearly, there's someone plotting. These Arabs must've sold her off! They dont respect women like we do-" only to be pushed away by Baldwin who told him to focus his energy on finding you.
Its been 3 hours since Baldwin's arrival and still no sign of you. Despite his best attempts, Salauddin could see Baldwin's calm demeanour chipping away. He was running out of patience.
They were now standing outside the madarrassa where all the scholars, students and staff were rounded up. Salauddin was the only one who knew about Abbas, but now that he looked at each face, he realised he was the only one missing.
Immeadiately, he sent the guards to find him. Salauddin was sure that he knew about your whereabouts, He had to.
"Who is Abbas?" Baldwin asked as they both followed the guards that had found out his residence.
Salauddin didnt miss the suspicion in his tone. As much as he wanted to toy with Baldwin, now is not the time.
"He is a craftsman. Y/n had hired him to make something for her. Maybe she went there to collect it." He purposely avoided telling him about the unique chessboard you had gifted him.
After half an hour, they had reached Abbas's residence. It wasnt all that odd to find the front door open, and truth be told, no one was expecting anyone to be home.
It was concerning to find the disasterous state of the house as they entered. Clay pots were smashed to the ground, a cage lying empty in one corner. Clearly, something had happened here.
However, something caught Salauddin's eye that made his heart sink.
Your chaddar, lying on the ground.
-
You woke up with a pounding headache. When your lids fluttered open, they first spotted the single candle in the corner of the dimly lit room. Memories of the previous events flashed through your mind and you fitted the pieces like a jigsaw puzzle.
When your eyes finally adjusted to the dimly lit room, you realised you were still in the same room the assassin had knocked you out. Not only that, but Abbas was also lying beside you, though he hadnt regained conciousness yet.
"Abbas- Abbas, wake up." You raised your hand to shake him, but your eyes caught the sight of your ripped sleeve. When- when did this-
You looked down at your clothes and realised they were all tattered too. Your niqaab was gone, you recalled the assassin had pulled off your chaddar during your escape attempt, and now that you looked at Abbas, he was in a similar state too. His clothes were torn and ripped too. But why? The assassin had already knocked you two out, he didnt need to-
You gasped, patting yourself to find your lack of belongings. Your time machine was gone, as was your jewellery an coins. You'd been robbed!
Panic surged into your veins as you violently shook Abbas, your machine was gone- your only way out of this era was gone!
"Abbas! Wake up!" But he only groaned in response. What was wrong with him?
You dont have time to wonder as you rushed to open the door. You need to catch that thief, assassin- whatever he was, before he got too far and you lost your time machine forever. Grabbing the handles, you tried to yank the door open, but it didnt even budge. Its... locked.
You whipped your head around, remembering the window you were trying to get out of earlier. Running up to it, you tried to open the wooden shutters, but they didnt move an inch. No. No. This is- this is not happening. You ran back towards the door. You felt your throat close up as you pulled the door with all your might before banging your fists against them in frustration.
You were locked in.
The thief has your time machine. He's probably gone far away with it. By the time anyone comes to your aid, he'd have fled the city. He'd be gone as Baldwin and Salauddin fight and burn Egypt to the ground. I'll be trapped here, probably die under the rubble with Abbas-
Abbas.
You look back at him, still unconscious. How hard was his head hit?
You fall back on your knees besides him, trying to wake him up. He'd know- Abbas would know how to get out of this room. He's smart, and he knows his house, probably built it himself- he'd know a way out.
"Abbas! ABBAS! Wake up! Wake up-!" You grabbed his head and laid it in your lap, turning it side-to-side to see if he was bleeding. You started to massage his temples, hoping the circulation will wake him up.
Wait. Circulation.
You recalled what they taught you in first aid class- what to do when someone faints? Raise their legs above heart level. You quickly moved and pulled his knees up until they were able to stay bent on their own, before cradling his head in your lap again, tapping his cheeks.
"Abbas- Abbas, wake up please. Abbas-! I swear if you dont wake up, I will give you a tight slap-"
You were cut off by the sound of the door being banged.
What in the-
The door shook as something hard banged against it. You jumped at the force. Did the war start already? Are they using cannonballs?
No. While cannonballs were used as heavy artillery in medieval Europe, it was more popularly used in the 1700s, but I'm still in the 1100s-
NOT THE TIME TO GEEK OUT! I'M ABOUT TO DIE-
The door burst open and light flooded into the room, blinding you for a moment. You raised your hand to shield yourself from the light before slowly bringing your hand down as you saw figures entering into the room.
Once your eyes finally adjusted, you recognised the figures in front of you.
Salauddin. Baldwin. Guy-
Guy?
All three of them stared at you, though your eyes remained focused on Baldwin, who looked at you, then at your clothes, and then... at Abbas.
The look of relief turned into confusion. What? Whats wrong?
You heard Salauddin yell something in Arabic at his soldiers, which made them instantly look away and leave the room. Baldwin kept looking at you in barely suppressed shock.
"Baldwin?" You whispered, though it was Salauddin who moved first, removing his chaddar and bending down to cover you with it, but your eyes were fixated on Baldwin's face. Why is he... looking at you like that?
Wait. If Baldwin and Salauddin are here together, then it means there's no war. Which means-
"Are you okay? What happened?" Salauddin asked you, though before you could answer him, Guy began laughing.
"Okay? She's more than okay!" He smirked. "After all, she was spending some time with her secret lover!"
Both your and Salauddin's eyes went wide. It finally clicked why Baldwin was looking at you like that.
He thinks you and Abbas-
"No. That's not true-" You tried to speak but Guy cut you off.
"Of course it is! Look at you, holding his head in your lap so sweetly!" He accused before snarling at you. "And you chose a dirty Muslim to cheat on our King? The audacity! And the lack of taste."
You shook your head. "Thats not true. This is Abbas. He's a- a craftsman-" "Oh, I'm sure you were pretty crafty with him too." Guy cut you off.
"Shut up, Guy!" You snapped. "I came to get my valuables from him. It was a gift! I had them commissioned for- for you Baldwin!" You half lied.
"And where is that gift?" Guy interrogated.
"I was robbed. We both were-" "Oh how convenient!" You glared at him. He was framing you. You pointed at your clothes. "How else do you explain the torn clothes?!"
Guy hummed and you knew you were going to regret as soon as a disgusting smile crept on his face.
"Well, animals fuck with wild passion-"
"I WAS ROBBED!" You yelled. "Look, the thief even knocked out Abbas!"
"I dont see a head injury." Guy shrugged. "I just think he's passed out from drinking. Or maybe his stamina wore out-"
"Shut up! Just shut up!" Your face was red with rage, though to anyone else it may have looked like you were caught red handed in a lie. You calmed yourself down. You need to explain before things got worse.
"Baldwin, I'm not having an affair with Abbas. He's married-" Once again, Guy cut you off, this time waving his hands. "My king, it doesnt matter to these Muslims. They're into polygamy. Whats one wife, when you can have four?"
Of all the things, this is the one thing he knows about Islam?
You didnt detect one, not a single emotion of trust or love from Baldwin's stoic face. Is he- is he actually believing this bull?
Why wouldnt he? He's a man after all. And who knows what other lies Guy has been filling his head with to make him doubt your loyalty?
Enough is enough. You need to come clean.
"You know what Guy? I was going to keep this a secret to let you beg for forgiveness, but I think its time for the truth, hm?" You watched Guy's smirk falter. Enough games. You stared at Baldwin with determination. "Here's what has happened Baldwin: Charlotte didnt just happen to drop by Jerusalem. No, Guy summoned her by pretending to be you. Oh and I have that exact letter where Guy used your respectful name as proof. Guy exploited Charlotte and his plan was to use her and her son's illness to infect you so that you could die and he could get your throne."
Guy's face paled. But you didnt stop there.
"Of course, when that didnt work because you and I have an unbreakable bond, Guy decided to get rid of me." You looked at Salauddin. "When I left for Egypt and I was at Salauddin's camp, he had hired assassins to ambush us in the dead of the night and kill me or Salauddin, or both! If I were to die while I was with Salauddin, he would've convinced you that Salauddin was the one who killed me. And if Salauddin was dead, then it meant good news for Guy because he would have to deal with one less enemy after he took your throne."
"Lies! There's no proof-"
"No proof? Baldwin, did you realise that more than half of my entourage was missing? Its because they're dead. And if that isnt enough proof, then this might help-" You pulled up your sleeves to show your fading burn marks. "My back is full of these marks because the assassins left me to die in a burning tent. It was Salauddin who saved me!"
"And today? When we heard you were coming, everyone thought that there will be a war. I left the palace on my own, to find you Baldwin. I wanted to stop you from committing unnecessary bloodshed! I came to Abbas's house to get my gift for you, but Guy sent a thief after us! The thief knocked us out and he robbed us both!" You explained. "Didn't you ever wonder Baldwin- why Guy decided to accompany you today? Guy has never left Jerusalem, not even for a war, not to defend his people. He wouldnt leave the throne empty! He hopes, he prays and he plots for you to die everytime you leave Jerusalem so that he can finally be king!"
"BLASPHEMOUS!" Guy screamed, red in the face. "You wench-!"
"With all due respect Guy, which is NONE! I didnt think you would be smart enough to come up with such schemes. I underestimated you, which turned out to be mistake because you made Baldwin doubt me!"
Guy shook his head and stood in between you and Baldwin, acknowledging the stoic faced king first. "This is slander! All lies, Baldwin! I'm your brother-in-law! I would never betray you!"
"Never betray Baldwin? You aren't even loyal to Sibylla! I could have more than half of Jerusalem attest to that you've tried sleeping with other women! Adulterer!" Guy's eyes practically popped out of his socket and he screeched.
"You dare accuse me of cheating?! YOU?! You're the one who is locked in a dark room with a strange man in your lap like a fucking whore!" Not risking Baldwin's suspicion, Guy stormed towards you with his hand raised to strike you.
"You unfaithful, lying bitch-!" You heard the air being sliced and you flinched as you felt something splatter across your cheek.
Thud.
You looked down to where the sound came from.
Guy's head dropped in front of you.
Your ears began ringing. Slowly, your eyes trailed back up to where his body remained.
Headless body. That fell to its knees before dropping to the side.
You could hear the ringing get louder.
Baldwin stood there, his eyes full of rage, his hand holding his sword that had just cut off Guy's head.
He was breathing heavily, nostrils flared and a vein popped in his temple. Your heart dropped as his eyes landed on you and he moved towards you.
Your consciousness finally gave out.
Salauddin caught you but not for long as Baldwin made his way to you. Fearing for you, Salauddin tried to bargain for your life.
"Baldwin, she didnt-"
"Let her go. Now." Baldwin commanded, throwing Abbas's head off your lap. He didnt wait for Salauddin to move, simply taking you from his arms, ripping off the chaddar and replacing it with his cloak instead, before picking you up.
"Lets go home." He whispered in your ear before kissing your temple, pulling you snug against him as he walked out of the room.
-
You wake up to the feeling something wet on your legs. You jolt, eyes snapping open as you look for your potential assaulter-
"Isabella?" You croaked as you saw the young girl at the foot of the bed, her face red and eyes swollen from all the crying.
"P-princess." She greeted tearfully, holding a wet towel in her hand. Her lips wobbled as she spoke, nose bright red, sniffling as she stared at you with those big sad eyes.
"What's wrong?" You couldnt help but be soft with her. She just- she looked so pitiful.
She looked down, her hands clutching the towel tightly. "You- you were- you were gone for so many hours. I- I didnt know where you were- his majesty and the sultan- they were so mad- they were so concerned- i- i didnt think they believed me when I said I didnt know- where- where you were- i thou-thought you were-" Her tears cut off her hiccuping explanation. You didnt think she would be this distraught over you.
"Its... its okay, Isabella. You didnt do anything wrong. I'm... fine." You tried to calm her down, beckoning her forward. You sat up on the bed, taking the rag from her hands before holding her hands in yours. Giving them a gentle squeeze, you assured her. "I'm fine, Isabella. In fact, I should apologise for causing you all the trouble-" She shook her head. "No- princess- its my duty to serve-" You gave her hands another squeeze, calming her down.
"Thank you- oh. Isabella-" You looked at her hands, noticing something red peeking from her wrist. You pulled her sleeve up, realising that the redness was from the welts on her arms. "What happened?" You asked, turning her wrist around, noticing a small scratch.
She pulled her hands away, pulling down her sleeves as she sniffled. "N-nothing to worry about, princess-"
"Did you get injured? Are you okay?" She nodded. "I just- when I heard you were missing, it made me worry too much and I- I tend to scratch my arms when I'm stressed!"
You gave her sympathetic look, grabbing the cool towel from earlier and handing it to her. "Oh, I'm so sorry, Isabella. Here- take this. It'll help your skin, hm?"
"But the king asked me to wipe your sweat with this-"
"Its fine- wait? What sweat?"
She nodded. "We've been travelling through the desert for some days. His Majesty suggested I be the one to wipe you clean while you were unconscious." Now that you looked around, you realised you were in a tent, much different in design to Salauddin's.
Wait, desert?
"We've left Egypt?"
"Yes-"
She stopped speaking as soon as the sound of footsteps filled the room.
You stiffened at the sight of Baldwin.
Isabella had to only take one look at his face before taking her leave. Events of the last time you had seen him flashed through your mind, and you couldnt help but be scared of him when you remembered the murderous look on his face as he killed Guy. It is one thing to know that a king has killed people, perhaps even more brutally than this but after spending so many months with Baldwin, you had become accustomed to his soft nature. Never in your worst nightmares could you have ever imagined such a barbaric actions from him, and to his own brother-in-law.
It made you question everything, your own mortality- your own safety with him.
"How are you feeling?" He had his arms crossed behind his back as he made his way towards you. It took everything for you to not flinch back and beg for your life. No- no, you need to think smartly. If he wanted to kill you, he wouldve gotten rid of you back there-
Or maybe he has decided to torture you.
"I'm fine." You replied weakly, keeping your eyes on your lap. You dont want to risk pissing him off.
Maybe I should apologise, clear the air before he has any other doubts about me.
"I'm sorry." You said abruptly, finally looking up at him. His stoic expression didnt falter. This is not the Baldwin you knew, no. This was the king you had imagined when you first came here. Stiff and apathetic.
Taking his silence as a sign, you continued. "I'm sorry... for everything. For hiding the truth about Guy, for causing misunderstandings, for making you doubt me-"
"I never doubted you." He cut you off.
Your brows raised in surprise. He sighed sitting down on the bed besides you.
"I never doubted you, Y/n. Not once." He said with conviction."I didnt doubt you when Salauddin said you'd be with Abbas. I didnt doubt you when Guy raised false allegations. I didnt doubt you when I saw you in that dark room alone with that man. You could've been naked in there and I still would not have doubted you."
Your lips parted. What... what was he-
"You trust me? That much?" You couldn't help but whisper.
He smiled sadly. "I do. And more than that, I trust in my love for you." Baldwin looked down at his hands, still smiling gently. "I love you so deeply that I know you would never betray me. I have loved you the way I want someone to love me. My love for you... it is free of impurity, of imperfection. And thats how I know you would never betray me."
You couldnt help the tears that came in your eyes, and you looked down. How could he- how could he-
"If anyone should apologise, it should be me, Y/n." Your head snapped back at him. He was looking at you with genuine guilt. "I may have loved you deeply but I have failed to express it to you. Had I- had I done a better job, had I let you know just how much I feel for you, you wouldn't have hesitated to come to me. You wouldn't have felt the need to hide your traumas, your pain from me. You wouldn't have felt shy to get my help, to tell me your secrets. All of this could've been avoided if I had made you feel secure enough to come to me. I alone am responsible-"
"Baldwin." Your teary voice cut him off. You shake your head, sniffling at him. "This- this isnt your fault- I-"
"You did nothing wrong." He assured you, holding your hand. "Traps were set for you, but it was my job to save you from them. I am your protector, your shield. I owe my life to you. I owe everything to you."
A tear slipped from your eye. "I- I didnt think you'd save me. I thought you didnt trust me- I thought I lost you forever." You dont know why you said that, but they were true.
"I would've found you. I will always find you." Baldwin cupped your cheek, he felt his heart break at your confession.
"If I don't go to you Y/n, then where do I go?" And at that, the dam you'd been holding finally broke.
Baldwin immediately pulled you into his lap, his arms wrapping around you as you buried your head into his shoulder, sobs wracking your entire being. You dont know why you're crying, whether its because of Baldwin's pure love for you, or that Guy is dead because of you and you've ruined the timeline, or because you're mourning the loss of your time machine and its just dawning on you that you're stuck here forever.
He patted your back, rocking you gently like a child. "All my paths lead to you, Y/n. All my conquests bring me to you. Everything leads to you." He kissed your cheek, his hand petting your hair smoothly as you broke down in his arms. "You... you are the beginning and end of my everything."
Baldwin pulled you away and wiped your tears away with his thumbs. "I love you, Y/n. And I know you love me too. You may not say it, but I know deep down in your heart, you love me. I know you do-"
"I love you, Baldwin." You said.
His eyes went wide. "You don't have to say it-"
"I love you, Baldwin. I really do." You admitted.
Baldwin's shock was replaced with joy, a grin gracing his face as he cupped your face and kissed your forehead deeply.
"You have no idea how happy you've made me." He whispered before pulling you into his embrace.
-
Following this, you both began your journey back to Jerusalem. Every now and then, you'd start crying again because you'd realised just how much you were loved by Baldwin. You remembered the time when you saw him with Charlotte and you didn't give him a chance to explain. You had already decided that he was a cheater, he was disloyal. Yet when the tables were turned, when everything pointed against you and Baldwin had every right to find you disloyal, have you punished for even being in a locked room with another man, he trusted you. He didn't question your love for him. And even if you didn't love him back then, you respected him enough, both as a king and as a man and he still didn't ask for an explanation, let alone accuse you of adultery.
The rest of the trip home was spent with you crying and Baldwin consoling you like a toddler. No matter how many times your tears fell, he was right there to wipe them away and assure you that you did nothing wrong.
Did you love Baldwin? Maybe not back then, but you do now. Perhaps he was right. Maybe you did love Baldwin deep down, you just didn't know it.
And it's not like you don't have a choice either way. With your time machine lost, you can't leave this place. So, you've accepted your fate and agreed to marry him. Baldwin says the wedding preparations are mostly complete and the wedding day is on Sunday.
Today is Friday, when you both finally reach Jerusalem. It didn't dawn on you until now just how you were going to face Sibylla, the woman whose husband was killed because of you.
But Baldwin already had a plan. "Guy was buried in an unmarked grave outside of Egypt. I have instructed my knights to inform everyone that Guy had died a dishonourable death because he was a traitor to the crown."
"Traitor to the crown?"
He nodded. "I'll tell Sibylla I caught him cheating on her and plotting against me." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Its believable. She'll be upset, but she'll get over it. Besides, she deserves better than him. I have already found a list of suitors for her."
He truly has thought of everything.
-
Sibylla as expected was the grieving widow and after she welcomed you and Baldwin, she excused herself and left. You pitied her, she really did love Guy despite all his shortcomings. But she also respected her brother.
After a quiet dinner, you had returned to your room. You sat on your bed as you thought over the events of the past few days. Baldwin had assured you that he doesnt hold any hostility towards Salauddin. In fact, to further put your mind at peace, he told you that he had invited Salauddin to the wedding. As for Abbas, Baldwin said he doesnt know what happened to him but he's sure Salauddin didnt harm the man.
"Did you ever find your family?" Baldwin had asked earlier. You shook your head, telling him that you mistaken someone you thought was family.
"I know you would prefer to have the Nikkah first, before our actual wedding, but I wasnt able to find someone to marry us off in the Islamic way. But then-" He grinned, almost proud of himself. "I decided who better than Salauddin?! Since he'll be arriving on the day of the ceremony, he could walk you down the aisle and then later that day, he could do the Nikkah for us!" You could only smile and agree, what difference does it make what ceremony happens first? You're stuck here either way, and you're gonna be his wife soon.
You sighed and got up to dress into something more comfortable. As you removed your clothes, your hand found something in your underclothes.
The key.
You fiddled with it. Its useless now. The thief probably has broken your machine or sold it and it could be anywhere in the world now, also useless without this key here.
You put it back in your underclothes. Perhaps it'll be of use you can craft your machine again one day.
Lying in your bed, you thought about Guy. You didnt feel guilty, no. He had it coming, and it really was a matter of you versus him at the end. But what bothers you is how much you had underestimated him.
Guy's plan was perfect. There was no chance of escape for you. He had ambushed you and Salauddin, and when you narrowly escaped that attack, he brought Baldwin to Egypt to cause misunderstandings between him and Salauddin. And when they found you with Abbas, all his allegations were perfectly said. You're only here because Baldwin was far too much in love with you. He had no reason to not take Guy's words over yours.
You turned to your side and closed your eyes.
Perhaps God saved me.
-
Today is Saturday and Sibylla had taken you to get your dress fitted.
"Whats that?" You pointed at the huge frame, covered by silk as the servants struggled to hang it on the wall.
"Oh, you're not supposed to see it yet, but Baldwin had commissioned a portait of you. He wants to gift it to you tomorrow, so dont peek. He'd hate to miss your first reaction." She explained.
"You look... absolutely stunning." Sibylla praised as she looked at you in awe. She brought some jewellery to pair with your white gown. A diamond necklace, tear drop earrings, and-
The ring.
"Its the-"
"The exact same ring!" Sibylla finished for you, slipping it on your finger. "After yours was stolen by that thief in Egypt, Baldwin had the same ring made again by the royal jeweller within a day!" Your heart warmed at the gesture. Baldwin must've known you felt guilty over losing his family ring.
"Isabella, will you pass me the veil?" You asked. Isabella brought the soft veil and helped you wear it. As she was adjusting it, your eyes caught sight of her hands again.
"Oh, they didnt heal?" You gently grabbed her hands, taking note of the same red welts on her arms again. She pulled her hands from your grasp away.
"N-no, they healed princess. Its just- its that I'm stressed again! Thats why my skin is itchy and I- scratched them raw."
"Stressed? By what?" You asked.
"Oh- um, the wedding." She muttered. "Its- its not that I'm not excited for it, I am very happy for the union of you and His majesty, but its just we have very little time and there's so much to do-"
You giggled, nodding at her understandingly. "I see. Well, I apologise for causing you to stress. And I hope you know how much I appreciate your efforts."
"Its my honour to serve you, princess." She squeaked.
"Well, do get those checked out soon, Isabella. I dont want you getting sick." Sibylla advised the young girl who bowed her head before taking her leave.
Sometime later, after you had lunch with Baldwin, you decided to go to the gardens and... be by yourself for a while.
Planned or not, I'm getting married tomorrow. This will be my last day as a single woman and I... I should savour every moment left.
You were sitting in a cozy little spot in the royal garden. It was besides the huge bush maze, near the area where your time machine had first gotten burned by the maids accidentally. Speaking of maids, the small entourage had given you space and were standing near the maze, away from your eyes with some knights. They were all eager to please you, the future queen, if only to get a better status by you or Baldwin.
But you had already decided to make Isabella your lady-in-waiting. She deserves it, for everything she's done for you.
You laid down on the soft bed of grass, looking up at the sky as you wondered what will happen tomorrow. Well, nothing about the wedding, Sibylla had made you rehearse several times that you knew exactly how the ceremony will go tomorrow. No, you were curious about... how your wedding will impact the future.
Will you cease to exist? Will the world change because the crusades might not happen since a Christian king married a Muslim commoner? Will there-
Doves flew up in the sky. You smiled, recalling the doves in Abbas's house. You hoped he was alright now. Maybe he could attend the wedding-
Wait.
You sat up with a jolt at the realisation, heart beating fast as you connected the dots.
-
Isabella rushed to the gardens. A servant had told her that you had immediately summoned her. Fearing the worst, she hiked up her gown and ran as fast as she could.
She was out of breath by the time she found you. "You called for me, princess?" She gasped out. You hummed, standing beside a gilded cage of doves.
"Arent they so beautiful?" You asked her, beckoning her to come forward. "They are indeed." She agreed, standing beside you.
"I was thinking of releasing them tomorrow, outside the chapel. All the maids could hold them in their hands and release them as I walk out with the king. What do you think?"
She nodded. "Wonderful idea. I'll go and have it arranged-"
"Hm? Oh, I took care of that. Why dont you open the cage and hold this one for me?" You smiled at her as you made you took a few steps back. "And gloves off, Isabella. I want to see how you will look like tomorrow."
Isabella throat ran dry, She gulped looking at you, then at the cage before back at you.
"I- I cant hold the doves, princess. They'll slip out of my hands-"
"We have plenty here for you to practise. Dont worry. Now make haste." You crossed your arms in front of you and looked at her expectantly.
She parted her lips to say something, but then looked back at the cage. "Whats the matter? Dont know how to hold them?" You sighed before making your way back to the cage. "They're just tiny little birds, gentle ones really. They wont bite you, so I dont know why you fear them. Here, let me show you how to hold one." You opened the cage and carefully held the dove in your hands, petting it softly. "There, there."
You suddenly thrusted the bird in her direction, and Isabella jumped back. "What's the matter? Scared of birds?"
Isabella hesitantly nodded. "Yes, I'm sorry princess- I- I- dont like birds. I'm very much afraid of them." You nodded understandingly, before placing the bird back in the cage. "How very inconsiderate of me. Very well, off you go." Isabella bowed graciously and was about to leave when you suddenly grabbed her arm and rubbed a feather along her exposed arm.
"P-princess-!" She shrieked, trying to yank her arm out of your grasp but your grip didnt relent.
"Would you look at that?" You grinned looking at the area turning bright red. "Are you itchy now? Did I stress you too much?"
Isabella could only look at you in horror as you became angry.
"How stupid do you think I am?" You snarled before throwing her hand down. "That itchy red skin wasnt from stress, it was from birds!" Her eyes widened.
"You had me thinking that your tears, your red skin, your snotty sniffles was because you were soooo concerned for me. But you actually had the rose fever from birds!" You recalled seeing the scratch on her hands the day you had first seen her skin, which wasnt just random skin welts. They were hives, from her allergy to avian protein (or birds, in simple terms).
Isabella could only look at you in silence as you continued. "How long did you think you could keep this charade up? Did you honestly think I wouldnt find out?!" She kept quiet while you continued, which only made you angrier.
"It was you. You were the thief. You- only you knew when I would leave the palace. You followed me! And you stole from me?!" When she didnt speak, your threatened her.
"Say something before I tell the king how you attacked me!"
Isabella looked up, and she smirked.
"You have no proof."
You looked at her in disbelief. Instead of defending herself, denying all the things- she basically admitted to it all.
"Isabella, where are my belongings?" You asked her. "If you return my things, I wont let you stay here, but I will let you leave this castle on your two feet." You didnt bother asking her why she did it, you cant waste any more time. You need to get your time machine back.
She shrugged, playing with her nails. Now that she was caught, she didnt bother putting up her scared, demure little girl image. "It doesnt matter. You will never get it. And you're not getting rid of me either. After all, you have no proof of any of the things you accused me of."
"You think you're going to get away with it?" She hummed. "I already have, princess. Now, I will be returning to my duties to prepare for you wedding tomorrow. And I think we'll do no birds-"
You pulled out a knife, silencing her. She looked at the knife before smiling. "Are you really going to kill me? Did you forget how I overpowered you and Abbas back there?"
"I havent." You bring the knife up to your throat. "But if you dont tell me where my belongings are this instant, I will slit my throat and let you explain to the king how you killed me. Oh and you may think you can just sneak out of here, but remember, there's a whole entourage who saw you come here. They'll tell Baldwin you were the last person to see me, and then no matter where you run, Baldwin will hunt you down. Him and his Templar knights."
Her brows furrowed at your threat. "Princess, I dont-"
"Dont think for a moment I wont do it, Isabella. I'm mental." When she remained quiet, you pressed the blade harder into your neck, just enough for the skin to break and blood to pour, making her eyes wide.
"Okay! Okay- stop! I'll tell you."
-
Isabella lead you to a room inside the castle, hidden away in a corner. You had never been here before, you realised when you stepped inside. She pulled out a drawer from the desk, which had a false floor in it. Lifting the wooden panel, you saw all your belongings, including your time machine.
"Leave." You ordered her. Once you were alone, you pulled out the key from your underclothes and placed it inside. Saying a tiny prayer, you turned on the machine.
It worked. The tiny lights turned on. All you had to do was set the date and-
The machine was snatched from your hands. "Isabella drop-!" Your eyes widened at the sight of Baldwin holding the machine.
"What are you doing?" He asked you, looking at the machine.
"Baldwin, please give it back-"
"This?" He shook the machine in his hands. "Sure, you can have it." He smiled at you before bashing the machine to the ground.
"BALDWIN NO! STOP!" You tried to stop him, but Baldwin pushed you away and kept smashing the machine until its lights went out and they key broke.
"NOOOOO!" You finally snatched it from his hands but it was too late. The screen wouldnt turn on, wouldnt display the date no matter what you did. The key was broken.
"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" You cried out.
"What is wrong with me? What is wrong with you?!" Baldwin yelled. "What were you going to do with that? Leave me, the love of your life, to go where?! Back to heaven?!"
Heaven? No fucking way-
"Do you- do you actually think I'm an angel?" Oh god. The look on his face was enough to let you know that he was actually serious.
"You can deny it all you want, but I am your husband to be and you cannot lie to me! You appeared out of nowhere in my castle. You cured me, you brought that baby back to life and you have escaped death one too many times! You may think I'm a fool, but I'm the king of Jerusalem, head of the Church and you were sent to me by God Himself! YOU ARE MINE AND I WILL NOT LET YOU GO BACK!"
Oh God. Oh God, you're marrying a crazy person.
Wait.
"How did you know I was here?" Your brows knitted together when he didnt reply, still looking at you in rage. "Did Isabella-" You gasped.
Of course. OF-FUCKING-COURSE!
"She wasnt a thief. She was a spy!" You chuckled humourlessly. "All this time, I thought Guy was behind it all, but I knew- I knew he was too dumb to come up with such a plan. It was you! It was always you! You sent the Ismailis after me! You sent Isabella after me to steal my belongings and spy on me! You set me up with Abbas so that when you "saved" me, I'd fall for you! Oh and I'm sure you made it seem like Charlotte was also here because Guy had called her. You framed Guy just so that you could have an excuse to get rid of him!"
"I did it because I love you!"
"You hurt me because you loved me?" You whispered to him, tears flowing down your cheeks. "I almost burned to death because of you. And you say- no. Why did you do this, Baldwin? Why the hell did you do all this?!"
"I was- I was testing you." He answered, bending down on his knee to cup your face. "I... only wanted to see if you would come to me for help. If you truly trusted me, loved me enough to come to me." He wiped your tears away. "I'm sorry it had to happen this way, but it worked out in the end-"
"You dont test the people you love, Baldwin."
"Oh, come on. Even God tests his strongest believers-"
"YOU ARE NOT GOD!" You shrieked, pushing him away.
"I'm not, but I'm special to Him. He made you for me. He gifted you to me. He made you fall in love-"
"I dont love you!" You cried. "I can never love you! Never!"
Baldwin's face hardened. "You do love me. You said so yourself. Now, youre just saying nonsense out of hysterics. Calm down-"
"I hate you. I have never loathed anything as much as I loathe you. I would never love you, even if you were the last man on Earth. I fucking hate you."
Baldwin stared at your red face. "Well, I hope you can change your mind because we will be getting married tomorrow regardless." He tried to touch your face but you slapped his hand away. "Besides, I love you enough for the both of us."
-
Its Sunday. You were locked in your room with a whole infantry ordered to not let you out. You had cried the entire night at your loss, at your fate, at your stupidity. How could you have ever trusted Baldwin? And now you will have to marry this religious lunatic.
The maids did their best to dress you up and tried to mask your red, swollen eyes. And with Isabella in the room, you were sure she had told them to not comment at your pitiful state.
You were standing outside the chapel with Salauddin. Everything seemed to blur, the choir singing, the attendees- you couldnt focus on anything.
"Y/n." You finally looked up at Salauddin, who was looking at you with deep concern. "Are you okay?" He asked you, noticing your teary eyes and dull expression.
"No."
He wasnt expecting you to answer bluntly.
"Do you want to marry Baldwin?" He whispered.
"No."
"I can help you-"
"No." You sniffled. "No one can."
The knights stood outside the chapel doors, waiting for you to enter. A few ladies held your trail behind you. Salauddin cast a glance at them before passing you something in your hand discreetly.
"Abbas asked me to give you this."
You opened your palm to see-
A key.
The key!
But how did he make this? You never designed it-
You smiled. That genius. He must've used the other parts to figure out the design and crafted it.
Abbas, I'm sorry I dont give you enough credit.
"Give him my thanks. And a lot of money, hm?" Salauddin could only nod in confusion. You looked back at your ladies. "I need to pee." Their eyes widened at the use of such crass language, especially in front of the sultan.
"But princess, the ceremony is about to start-"
"Would you rather I pee in my gown?" You snapped.
"But there is no bathroom here-"
"Then be useful and find a sheet and a bush. Now!" They all scrambled away to find some bush. You looked at the knights in front of you. "Go inside and inform them of a delay. The princess has to take a shit."
They looked hesitant to leave. "I'm not taking off my underclothes in front of you men. LEAVE!" They hurriedly went inside and closed the door to give you privacy.
You looked at Salauddin. "Can I borrow your horse?" He nodded, helping you up on it.
"Where are you going? I'll come with."
You shake your head. "No. I have to go alone. And I suggest you go inside as well."
"Y/n-"
"Please, Salauddin. No more questions. I dont want to lie to you." You smiled at him.
Salauddin reluctantly went inside the chapel, and you rode the horse out of there. There was only so long before Baldwin realised you had left, so you needed to speed things up. Grateful that you had swapped your broken time machine during your heated argument with Baldwin. You placed the new key in, just as you heard the sound of galloping horses and Baldwin-
"Y/N!" You didnt pay attention as you sped off ahead, only stopping when you reached the edge of the cliff. Climbing down, you looked at your machine as you turned the key.
It didnt turn on.
No. No. No-
"Y/N! GET BACK HERE!" Baldwin yelled at you, getting off his horse as he made his way. His troops had surrounded the area so you couldnt escape.
You looked back at your time machine and you- you banged it with your hand. "Come on. Come on!" This had to work- you banged on it as you would bang on a TV set when it stopped working, on a remote when it didnt operate quite right.
"Did you think you could escape me?!" You looked up and Baldwin was a few feet away.
"Baldwin stop!" You took a step back, nearing the cliff. "I'll jump-I'll fucking jump, I swear!" He halted.
"Dont be stupid, Y/n. Come to me, and we can put this behind us-"
You banged on the machine, cutting him off.
The machine turned on.
You grinned as Baldwin stared at you, shaking his head. "Dont-"
You jumped, pressing the button and hoping you returned to your time. You hadnt been able to set the date cause of the broken buttons.
The last thing you heard was Baldwin screaming your name.
So what do you guys think? Yall better comment and send asks and reboots because i sacrificed lunch and dinner for this.
Also, what do u guys think will happen in the next part? Do you think she'll return home or to a new timeline??? And which era???đđ
PART 8 is here!
#yandere baldwin#yandere salauddin#time traveller au#baldwin iv#king baldwin x reader#the leper king#king baldwin iv#salauddin
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every so often i like to slip sentences into my procedure that i hope read as a little too honest for a student trying to get a good grade
#rereading this sentence made me reword it slightly in the real thing lol#the font this week? 'apple garamond'; thinking of saving 'butterbrotpapier' for the final report to make it look crusty as possible#also i am feeling generous towards the prof rn bc he did Not scold me this week uwu#he got a cn spam email in the lab n i n my partner went to listen to it for him in case it was anything important#which is how i learned his wife is from china n he learned my family is from taiwan#n he was like 'hopefully [china n taiwan remain separate entities] in this political climate' n i laughed#n he was like 'it is something that very well may happen and IS dangerous' n in my head i was like#'ah yes i know professor that was not a laugh of dismissal that was a laugh of Acutely Aware Fear(tm) qwq'#the worm speaks
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[GI] Kinktober Day 10: "Exhibitionism"
Summary: After your stunt with Tartaglia, you are forced to deal with the repercussions of Capitano's not-so-well-hidden jealousy.
Warning(s): Reader is fucked in front of an audience, Dub-Con, Degradation, (Probably a whole slew of other warnings that I canât think of rn).
Side Note(s): Okay soâI switched it up last minute to exhibitionism because I realized that I get confused easily between that and voyeurism (+ I have more of a love for exhibitionism anyway).
Also, this is kinda an unofficial pt. 2 to the "Sharing" fic I posted? I mostly kept to the same "storyline"(?) because it was easier on the brain for me.
Your relationship with Capitano has been in a...weird spot, to the least, ever since that day between yourself, Tartaglia, and Capitano.
At the end of it all, the men didn't even get what they had originally wanted. You were far too fucked-dumb to even decipher who was who, much less come up with enough letters capable of yelling out a name. But, for the sake of being tired himself, Tartaglia had admitted "defeat" and carried on his merry way! Eventually, he left Capitano's war band and continued on his own personal mission, leaving you behind and working for Capitano permanently like you were originally supposed to.
But it's been awkward.
Capitano was curt with you, only speaking to you when he needed to. If you were caught taking a moment to relax, you began to pray that Capitano wouldn't happen upon you, he'd only immediately order you to get back to work!
No longer did he greet you warmly and no longer did he seem to care about your well-being. When the entire war party moved, he no longer expected you to be by his side, nor did he constantly check to see if you were! You could've been at the very back of the party and he wouldn't have given a single damn.
You had a mind to call your boss out on his behavior, pull him aside, and ask what the issue was and...whether or not there was still something between you both.
Although, you already had a mind to think that any feelings that may have started to blossom had long since been crushed underneath heel and foot.
Until today that is, when you were in your tent and finishing up some reports.
. . .
You quickly rose to your feet when Capitano suddenly entered your tent, bowing your head as you murmured a respectful 'Lord Capitano' in greeting.
He responded with a gruff noise of acknowledgment. "There will be a feast held tonight," Capitano said.
Your brow cocked, a feast? You hadn't heard anything relating to a feast at all. "Our efforts and missions have been going smoothly, I figured it's overdue to reward everyone in this camp. Even you." You bit the inside of your cheek at the cold way he addressed you. Had you known that accepting Tartaglia's offerâthat rogue ginger-headed charmerâwould lead to such an awkward tension between you and Capitano, you would've never allowed Tartaglia to trick you!
"...That's...that's kind of you." You said before sighing.
He nodded his head before turning to leave, prompting you to quickly stop him. "M-My Lord," You started off. "About that day...are you stillâ"
"I'll be taking my leave,"
"Lord Capitano!" You said more firmly this time, walking around your desk and beginning to close the distance between the two of you. "You can't continue to avoid me, n-not to mention treat me as Iâ" You stopped in your tracks when the first harbinger turned his head to look at you. And although you couldn't see his eyes, nor his expression behind that dark mask...the danger that oozed off of him. It made you audibly gulp as you took a few steps back.
You bowed your head in silent apology. "...You will come to my tent before the feast officially begins." Then, he walked out. A cold bead of sweat dripped down your neck at the vague order. Either it would be nothing aside from more work, Capitano deciding to kill you, or...hopefully, he'd finally get over his attitude and talk to you.
You couldn't stand how things were at the moment.
So, when the time finally arrived and the feast was ten minutes away from the beginning. You found yourself in Capitano's tent, your hands resting neatly in front of you as you stood at the entrance of his lavish tent. "My Lord, the feast will begin soon." You gently reminded him. "Shall I alert the soldiers of anything before it begins?" You continued.
You didn't receive a response until Capitano emerged from the covered part of his tent, adorned in the usual attire he wore when he appeared during important Fatui functions or battles. "No," He answered. "Simply follow me." Your brow rose as he walked past you, but nonetheless, you dutifully followed after him outside and back into the steadily warming air thanks to the bonfire that had just been set up.
As the soldiers began to gather, however, Capitano clearing his throat before he broke out into an, admittedly, very admirable speech as he thanked and showed gratitude towards his soldiers. Certain things started to stand out to you as your eyes washed over the crowd. Such as...the doctors and nurses of the camp weren't present, surely they deserved some praise and appreciation too? Too many times have soldiers or even your boss himself had come into the camp injured from head to toe! They'd quickly patch them up and almost seem to perform magic, you've heard soldiers state that one doctor in particular was good at numbing the pain!
There were none of the cooks, blacksmiths or even the younger soldiers that were fresh into the party, tasked to simply stand aside and watch.
All this boiled down to this "feast" being composed of nothing more than the more experienced soldiers, simply leaving you with a number ranging around the hundreds.
As pieces started to merge together although...a heavy hand placed itself on your shoulder, and then, you tuned back into the conversation. "...You will all bear witness as to my secretary learning who she truly belongs to, hopefully with an audience, she will learn not to be so easy for others."
What had just happened?
. . .
"Apologize." Capitano gruffly ordered you as the loud sound of your squelching cunt echoed through the camp. Not even the whistling winds could muffle your desperate panting as Capitano fingered your soaked cunt, taking special care to not knick you with his claws. "Apologize for being such a desperate whore..." He hissed out, loud enough for everyone to hear. "...for being so easy to fuck, not even having the courtesy to quiet yourself down despite being in a camp full of my soldiers."
Your cheeks burned with shame as you could feel hundreds of eyes on you. You didn't know whether you wanted the soldiers to be disgusted at the sight and turn away or if...you preferred this in a sick way, although there were some women amongst the crowd, the heavy sound of panting amongst the men made you clench around nothing, your slick beginning to drip and run down from your cunt and onto Capitano's lap.
Something that the ever-vigilant Captain didn't miss.
"You shameless whore." He snarled in your ear, your body shuddering at the feeling of his sharp teeth grazing the skin on your ear. "You're getting even wetter at being watched?" The harbinger nearly had a mind to laugh at how your legs twitched, as if you wanted to curl into yourself at his cruel words. He almost allowed himself to feel bad, until he smelled how your arousal grew at his words.
Oh...so you liked this.
Well...that explained everything.
Slowly, he took his fingers away from your cunt, a string of arousal still connecting him to you as he brought them up to his face. "So that's why you fucked my fellow harbinger." He sneered, opening and closing his index and middle finger, playing with your slick.
"H-Huh?" You moaned, both in disappointment and confusion. Despite the cold, your body burned with desire, one that grew more potent by the passing second as you felt Capitano's obvious hard-on behind you. You were grateful for your tears blurring your vision, for as Capitano continued to let you sit in his lap exposed to his soldiers, you at least could fool yourself into thinking that no one was paying attention.
But only for so long.
A scream tore from you as the Captain's fingers returned to your sex, his fingers dipping into your pussy before they had quickly found your g-spot whilst his other hand wrapped around your torso to begin flicking rapidly at your clit. All the air in your lungs were nearly knocked out of you at the rate of how quickly you were approaching your climax, your hands fruitlessly clawing at Capitano's forearms as drool started to dribble from the side of your mouth, your eyes starting to roll into the back of your skull.
"C-Captain..." You moaned. "O-Oh Archons...!" You keened.
He didn't relent. "Take it," He ordered as if he were ordering a soldier. "Considering you've taken me and Tartaglia at the same time...you should be used to the pleasure." He chuckled gruffly.
He tightened his hold on you as you squirmed. "Slut," He spat. "Quit squirming."
It was only when Capitano suddenly bit down on your shoulder were you pushed off the edge, your mouth falling open in a silent scream as your body stilled and your vision turned completely white. For a long while, you drifted on that cloud of sheer bliss...until you were brought back down by the feeling of something hard slapping against your cunt, snapping you back to reality before you were face to face with the harbinger's cock.
Starting off at a lighter color at the base before turning into a dark purple towards the middle and upwards at the tip. You shuddered when you remembered that Capitano's cock was inside of you...not even a whole two weeks prior! The ridges along his dick were intimidating, especially with the way it twitched and oozed pre-cum.
You gasped when he parted your cunt wider with his fingers. "If you won't apologize with your mouth..." He started off before he lifted you a little, as easily as he would carry a sack of flour before the tip of his cock pressed against your opening. "...Maybe you'll be more apologetic with your pussy."
. . .
Capitano didn't waste any time to wrap a hand around your mouth, although, the sheer size of his hand nearly engulfed your entire face. As he pressed you impossibly closer to him, he made sure to get really close to your ear as he spoke to you. "Make sure to look my soldiers in the eye as you apologize to me with this cunt of yours." He said before he slowly pushed himself into you.
Immediately, you broke his command, your eyes threatening to roll into the back of your head. Something that Capitano quickly corrected with his free hand slapping the side of your thigh. "Look at them." He reminded you. As more of his dick sunk into you, your eyes blurry and struggling to focus as you looked at the soldiers before you. You accidentally made eye contact with one of them, all before...your eyes glimpsed at his noticeably hard cock.
In fact, you noticed how all of them were hard.
Your cunt clenched tighter around your boss' dick at that realization. "Fuckâ" He whispered. "You must've noticed, hm? How they all yearn to fuck you? My secretary." He continued.
When your pussy twitched at his words, he lightly pinched your side in punishment. "Greedy pussy...still eager to take more cock despite having me inside of you?" A muffled yelp resounded against the harbinger's hand when the rest of the Captain's dick was suddenly pushed into you. More moans followed suit as his fat tip began to poke and prod at your sweet spot, deep inside of you. "Don't worry, I'll curb your greediness soon." He whispered, the sheer possessiveness in his deep voice making goosebumps pop up all over your skin and down your spine.
More than you cared to realize, you loved when your boss was possessive over you. And that love only grew more when he started to move, his balls slapping against your skin as he took up a brutal pace almost immediately. You tried your best to keep your moans quiet when he suddenly released his grip over your mouth for it to take up stationing itself on your waist, aiding in pulling you down faster and harder against his pelvis. But it was so fucking hard to be quiet when he was fucking you like he was afraid of loosing you. As if you'd be gone the second this was all done.
"C-Captain..." You groaned. "F-Feels so good...!" You continued to cry out, blissful tears running down your face as you lost yourself in the feeling of his cock. Delicious sparks ran up and down your spine at the feeling of the ridges alongside his cock rubbing against your walls, your arms coming to loop themselves around the back of the Captain's neck as his groans started to become more and more audible.
His cock was touching all the right spots inside of you, making you see stars behind your eyes. "Fuckâ" He snarled. "Archons...your cunt is squeezing me so tightly." He groaned, his head coming to bury itself in the crook of your head before he whispered more words you were too cock-drunk to decipher. You whined when he sped up the pace of his thrusts against you, your cock-drunk babbles turning from moaning to pleading for him to go easier on you, much to the harbinger's amusement. "Too much?" He mocked, faking sympathy as he fucked you harder in turn. "That's too bad. You wanted this, so you're going to fucking take it." He growled.
He was suffocating you in the best way possible as each time his cock slid into you, it practically punched the air from your lungs, the scent of sex in the air making it feel like it was hard to breathe. But you loved it. You assume that's why your second orgasm snuck upon you so suddenly, the presence of people watching your boss fuck you silly on his lap...the degrading words he whispered into your ear in combination to the pleasure. It was all making your mind spin. "You're fucking tightening up on me..." Capitano grit his teeth together, his claws beginning to dig into your skin.
"Gonna cum?" He asked before he kissed the side of your neck, lightly nipping it as he felt his orgasm begin to approach as well. "Cum all over my cock then." He cooed, the feeling of his twitching dick battering against your cervix making you let out a few more strangled moans before you froze again him with a loud cry.
"Fuck...fuckfuckfuckfuck." He groaned, fucking you through your orgasm for a few more thrusts until he stilled against your still twitching pussy with a loud hiss of his own. You moaned softly as you struggled to come down from being dicked down, a dopey grin plastering itself onto your face as you looked behind you with both a happy expression and a shy one.
The harbinger, although dazed and hidden behind his mask, smirked confidently, the way he moved to run his fingers through your hair shockingly gentle.
He doubted you would want to go and find someone else to fuck after tonight.
#smut#genshin impact smut#genshin impact#genshin smut#genshin fanfic#genshin fatui#genshin fandom#genshin impact fandom#genshin impact fanfics#genshin capitano#genshin impact capitano#genshin x reader#il capitano x reader#capitano#fatui harbingers#il capitano#genshin impact fatui#capitano smut#il capitano smut#genshin capitano smut
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just pr I ln4
pairing: lando norris x ricciardo!reader summary: after being caught hooking up with lando, you both decide it would be good for your images to fake date. too bad you hate each other. notes: been loving enemies to lovers rn𫣠masterlist
f1gossip
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f1gossip New WAG alert? After a night of partying, Lando Norris was pictured kissing Y/n Ricciardo outside the club! Onlookers claim they then went home together after thisđ He was seen having a private dinner with another girl just a few days ago and rumored to have brought a different girl on his ski trip a few weeks ago.
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user lando is on a streak LOL
user this is so random?!? i was not expecting this duo but im here for it HAHA
user no cause she rarely attends races but when she does shes never seen with lando?đ
user omg he better not play my girl, I love y/n
user WHAT DOES DANIEL THINK OF THIS OMG
user I wanna read the family gc so bad...
user wait they would be so cute
user is he finally settling down omg
user I hope so, I lowkey see them together
user im here for it!! shes so much better than these other girls hes been seen with
notification center
danny what. were. you. thinking. you're in so much trouble missy call me ASAP!!!
y/bff/n LANDO NORRIS?!?!? WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM BEING A PIECE OF SHIT??? girl we need to debrief last night
lando norris we need to talk
Fucking fantastic.
Based on your notifications, you put two and two together and realized you were paparazzi'd with none other than the man you hated the most. You and Lando had a very complicated relationship to say the least. You had met when your brother, Daniel, joined McLaren and from the start he had given you the cold shoulder. You didn't know what you did wrong and tried to be kind to him, but after a while you stopped when he dismissed you like a child. You thought you would get along with him after Danny had told you about his interest in photography. You yourself were a photographer and decided to take the year traveling with your brother to capture some photos in F1, but you had figured the fame was getting to Lando especially after his breakup with his girlfriend. He was starting to bring different girls to the garage in every race and you would never see them again after.
You remember your last interaction with him in the McLaren garage in the final race of the '22 season was when the complicated part of your relationship began.
"What are you doing here, y/n? This is a place for serious professionals, not hobbyists."
"Lando, always the charmer. I'm here to photograph greatness."
"Greatness? You wouldn't know greatness if it lapped you on the track."
"Well, I'm pretty sure greatness doesn't come with an ego the size of your car."
"Watch your tone, y/n. This is a dangerous place, not a playground for kids."
"I can handle myself, Lando. Unlike some people, I don't need a helmet to protect my head."
Both your eyes were filled with hatred as they interlocked, each refusing to back down. As the race begins, y/n continues to snap photos, capturing Lando's intense focus and determination.
After the race, both Lando and Daniel were disappointed they were not able to get into the podium on their last race of the season. Your brother asked for some time alone so you approached Lando, camera in hand, knowing it would be the last time you were in the same garage as him.
"Tough race, Lando. I got some incredible shots, though."
"Don't patronize me, y/n."
"You know for what it's worth, I saw a different side of you on the track this season. It's like you're fighting not just against other drivers, but against something within yourself.
"What are you talking about?"
"I may be the younger sister of your teammate, but I'm not blind. There's more to you than the arrogant facade you put on."
After that conversation, you began seeing Lando less and less considering your brother was now racing in AlphaTauri and you were hardly at the paddock anymore. The few times you did see Lando, the tension had shifted into something different. But it was now winter break and you and Lando were both back in Monaco.
You had gone out last night and you did not believe your luck when you saw Lando in the same club with a smirk on his face. Determined to show you could rise above the tension, you decided to lose herself in the pulsating rhythm of the music. As you moved to the beat, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Turning around, you found yourself face-to-face with none other than Lando.
"Surprised to see me, princess?" He looked at you with a mocking smile knowing the nickname would rile you up.
"Surprised to see you alone at a club and not wrapped up with some girl? Yes, actually."
"Didn't take you for the jealous type, I like it."
Against your better judgment, you found herself drawn into banter with him. The tension between you turned into a strange kind of chemistry as you exchanged barbs, each remark escalating in intensity. A few drinks were exchanged and you slowly began to lose your guard around him and eventually ending up on his bed that night.
You groaned at the memory of last night's mistake and decided it was best to text Lando back before anyone else to get your story straight. He quickly replied saying he was on his way and you began to straighten yourself up.
"You know usually when I hook up with a girl I don't see her the next morning. Consider yourself lucky y/n."
"Still arrogant as ever, even when we're both fucked right now."
"Well you're a little more fucked than I am really."
"Just get in here Lando." You opened the door to let him in and quickly shut it afraid you would be pictured together again.
"I've got good news for you sweetheart. My team has made a plan to sort this mess out."
"Go on with it. What is it?"
"Jeez feisty in the mornings, heh? But congratulations, you are officially my girlfriend, we've been dating for a few weeks now and have kept it under wraps to figure out our feelings for each other privately."
"A fake relationship? That's your solution? No fucking way."
Lando sighed and rolled his head back in annoyance. He knew you were immediately going to shut this idea down but he had planned what he was going to say beforehand and knew what to say to convince you.
"You think I want to do this? My team needs me to do this, I haven't exactly looked like a saint these past few weeks and hooking up with my friend's sister behind his back isn't going to make me look any better."
"And what's that got to do with me?"
"Well in case you haven't noticed, this doesn't look good on your part either princess. There's some hateful people on the internet already slut shaming you and saying you betrayed your brother. If we tell people we were already dating prior to these pictures, it lessens the hate. Not only that, are you really going to tell Danny you had a meaningless one night stand with one of his friends?"
You knew he had a point. Danny wasn't going to be happy if he found out about the brewing tension between you and Lando.
"Please y/n, the internet already likes us together. This would be good for us."
"Lando Norris saying please? Wow, never thought I'd see the day." You genuinely were shocked at his desperateness for you to agree, you didn't think about how this affected him as much it did you.
"Yeah, yeah. It's only for a few months then we could go back to pretending we dont exist to each other."
"Okay fine, just for a few months. And I'm doing this for Danny, not for you." You quickly agreed not really thinking it would be that big of a deal. Just a few posts and appearances together and this would be over before you knew it.
"I knew you'd give in." Lando gave you one of his infamous smirks and planted a kiss in the corner of your mouth. "Now come on we need some pictures to make this convincing."
And so it begins.
landonorris
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landonorris secrets out
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user OMFG
user im actually so happy theyre so cuteđâ¤ď¸
user WHAT WAS DANNYS REACTION
yourusername đ§Ą
danielricciardo on the next flight to monaco btw. maxverstappen1 yourusername ooouuu you're in troubleeee user LMFAO MAX user WAIT DID DANIEL NOT KNOW???
danielricciardo đŤ đŤ
user AHAHAH he doesn't seem too happy user đ
user am I tripping or is he holding y/ns camerađĽš
user it looks like the one she always has on her I LOVE THEM ALREADY
user my new roman empire I won't shut up about them from now on
user wasn't lando just with other girls?
user he can have female friends!! its not impossible
part two??
#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris smau#lando norris fanfic#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris#f1 x reader#ln4#f1 fanfic#daniel ricciardo#f1 imagine#f1 fic#mclaren formula 1#lando norris imagines#lando x reader#lando fluff
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If you could breathe, he would be the air in your lungs; if your heart could beat, he would be the lifeblood coursing through your veins.
O, Fitcherâs bird, how comâst thou here? And what may the young bride be doing?
VanitasâLife is vain. As the true nature of their bond is revealed, the Vampire Ascendantâs Dark Consort is reminded of the futility of swimming against the currents of fate, and must decide whether she shall drown in its river of blood, or let herself be gently carried to the shore.
Ascended Astarion x Spawn Tav (F!Reader)
w/c: 12.8k words . ao3 . spotify playlist . 18+ only . nsfw . dividers
a/n: thank you for reading! I decided to attempt something a little more plot heavy this time, hopefully it is an interesting read! again I would like to dedicate this work to @locallegume and hismostbelovedspawn. thank yâall for being always so kind and supportive!
tags: blood drinking; non-con blood drinking; body worship; light dom/sub; vaginal fingering; creampie; hurt & comfort; emotional sex; dry humping; possessive behavior; intercrural sex; frottage; mind control; aftercare; choking; piv sex
He will notice. He will know.
The metal surface of the key on your hand feels cool against your skin; lifeless and cold, not unlike yourself. As you look down at it, the world dissolves into darkness, a sickening surge of dread welling up from your stomach and running down your spine. Its serrated edge is stained with redâyour red. Even if you wipe it, wash it with soap and water, rub it vigorously until all traces of blood are gone, remnants of your scent will linger on it still. Maybe not to the untrained nose, no; but to a vampire, it would most definitely be noticeable, of that you are certain. Your darling is, however, no mere vampire, but the Ascendant, whose consortâs distinctive bouquet he would undoubtedly be able to recognize anywhere, even more so while it is still fresh. There is no escaping your fate, and as that merciless truth dawns on you, you curse yourself for your own foolishness, for your vain stubbornness. Was it worth it? Whatever did you gain from this? Knowledge? For what purpose? To what end? You find answers to none of these questions, and yet another plagues your mindâonce the truth is uncovered, what will happen then?
âMy lady. The master is home.â
If your inert heart was capable of skipping a beat, it would have done so just now. You turn around in a swift movement, only to be met with a pair of ruby red eyes staring back into your own, their gaze ever so apathetic, unemotional, yet you see a spark of something in them that worries you greatly: cognizance. She knows; the one your darling calls your âlady-in-waitingâ, who you are nonetheless very well aware is loyal not to you, but to him, and him alone. She is the only one who remained from the very first batch of spawn he sired, other than you. Shortly after you both moved into what would come to be known as the crimson palace, now his by right following his triumph over his old master, he decided that all the mortal servants who survived were to be turned, for he aspired to make an army of spawn, and where better to start than by turning those who would willingly surrender themselves to him?Â
She was one such servant, of course; a human, whose short lifespan would be made inconsequential by the gift of immortality. And yet, as he would soon come to learn, not even the Vampire Ascendant is immune to the dangers of siring those who have yet to prove themselves worthy. One fateful evening, upon walking into one of your fellow spawn trying to force himself on you, he would kill them all in a fit of rage, taking back the gift he had so generously offered only to be repaid with such vile betrayalâall except your lady-in-waiting, whom he had grown to trust, for she was hauntingly fascinated with his eternal adoration of you. As it were, she was the one who warned him of what had been about to happen that night; not out of fondness for you, naturally, but rather as a desperate measure to protect from corruption what she worshiped as the purest form of love, one so raw and so relentless that not even the gods themselves would dare quell its vicious, unforgiving flames. She would not allow anyone to rob you from him, nor anything to stand between youânot even yourself.
âAh, yes. Iâll be there in a moment,â you say, trying to sound as collected as you possibly can, yet failing miserably at it. The situation youâve been caught in looks incredibly suspicious as there would otherwise be no reason for you to be in your loverâs study, crouching behind his desk, and both you and your lady-in-waiting are fully aware of this. She can probably smell the scent of your blood, too, as the papercut on your thumb leaks still, a thin red trail running down your hand, smudged on the spot where it came into contact with the object that is now evidence of your misdeed. Neither of you acknowledge this, yet the oppressive silence lingers, perhaps even more unnerving than it would have been if she said something, anything about it. But she doesnâtâin fact, she remains completely still, standing in the doorway and watching you quietly, knowingly, her sharp eyes boring into your jittery self. She doesnât intend to leave, not without you at least.Â
You look at the documents scattered over the desk, and then back at her, almost as if to ask for permission; she doesnât react to this, which is as good an answer as any. With trembling fingers, you awkwardly gather the papers and put them back inside the open drawer as discreetly as you can, praying that she hasnât noticed which drawer it is, yet knowing full well she likely has. One paper remainsâthe one whose rugged edge cut into your flesh, and that which youâd been reading before it spilled your blood and stained the drawerâs key. It is the sole reason why you are even here, stuck in this predicament.Â
Earlier in the day, one of the maids had brought a letter that had arrived that morning to your darling while you were both sitting at the breakfast tableâa letter addressed to you. You questioned him about it, asked him if you could read it, yet as heâd done with the many others that had arrived before it, heâd lay it aside and tell you, âDearest, let me spare you the trouble of worrying your pretty little head about such trifling matters.â And as always youâd comply, because you trusted him. Still and all, when hours later heâd inform you he had some urgent business to attend to in the upper city and that he wouldnât be back for supper, your mind would sneakily wander to thoughts of stealing into his study while he was gone. Could those letters have been sent by your old companions? Those who had once traveled alongside youâthose who you had once called friends? It would be easy, so easy to just grab the key to the drawer where heâd toss your correspondence, for you knew he kept it in the pocket of his overcoat, yet you trusted him, did you not? Youâd tell yourself you did, and then let the matter rest; for a few minutes at least, before your wandering thoughts would inevitably circle back to the tantalizing prospect of seizing that golden opportunity. You managed to suppress the ever growing temptation for the rest of the day, but when the clock struck nine, that fading last chance became too hard to resist, and curiosity emerged victorious in the fierce battle raging within you.
Your prize now lies before you, for better or for worse, although as youâve come to find out, and to your utter disappointment, the sender is in fact not any of your old companions. As for the contentsâtoo much information, too little time to process, and youâve yet to make sense of it all. With a heavy, frustrated sigh, you take one last look before tucking the letter back inside the envelope, eyes lingering on the senderâs initials:Â
To the bride of the Vampire Ascendant,
I hope this letter finds you well. As with my others, I donât expect a response, yet ever so often I feel compelled to write to you on the off chance that the information I share may somehow be of use. I suppose I may have something of a soft spot for you, for I have once been in a position I consider very similar to yours. I would even go so far as to call you kin. Yet as I have done in the past, I would remind you that there will always be a way out. You are not trapped, regardless of what your sire would have you believe.Â
Observations Iâve made over the past few years have all but confirmed my thesis that you are indeed no spawnânot of the common variety, anywayâand while I empathize with your unwillingness to put that theory to the test, the evidence leaves little room for interpretation. I understand my⌠surveillance of you may be unsettling, but I cannot ignore what is to me now clear as day: you do bear three bite marks, do you not? One on your neck, the other on your shoulder, and the last one on your wrist.Â
I implore that you think back to your turning: was there pain? Was it agonizing? Terrifying? A spawnâs turning is a terrible, terrible thing. Do you remember the gruesome feeling of all life being drained from your body? Because if notâwell, that would be most unusual. Did you partake of your sireâs blood? Not that youâd be able to remember that, of course. The usual turning rite is nothing like what you probably experienced. Three bites, delirious pleasure, drinking from your sire: all hallmarks of a vampiric brideâs creation. The dark kiss, they call it. Has your sire ever compelled you? Surely not. You retain your free will, after all, unlike common spawn. And that is my point: the connection needs not be severed for you to leave.Â
If you ever reconsider my offer, our small settlement in Gillianâs Hill would welcome you with open arms. Some of us are also runaway brides, although none are sunwalkers like yourself, of course. Our community would benefit greatly from your presence. Should you decide to join us, just say the wordâI will come to you.Â
Your friend,
L.I.
The hour of reckoning is upon you.
There he stands, near the entranceway, surrounded by the servants who have come to greet him. He is giving instructions to one of themâyou will be hosting another of his infamous soirees soon it seems. Some patriarâs niece has apparently taken a liking to him, puppy love no doubt, an excellent opportunity to make yet another powerful ally. You watch him silently from your position a few feet away, your lady-in-waiting close beside you, and the pit of your stomach tightens every time it seems he is about to turn in your direction. It takes but a few minutes for him to finally acknowledge your presenceâhis stern gaze immediately softens once he lays eyes on you, the hint of a smile appearing on his lips, and for a moment you almost lose yourself in the gentleness of his expression.
â...Astarion,â you softly say his name, your voice quiet, uncertain. His smile widens as he turns away from the servant and approaches you; the closer he is, the better you can see him, and you canât help but think of how very handsome he looks in his black waistcoat, embroidered with red spinel gemstones. The overflowing love you feel impossibly warms your chest and causes tears to well up in your eyes at the mere sight of him, yet the creeping guilt haunts you still, impossible to ignore.
âMy love,â he coos, bringing his hand to your face and lovingly brushing his fingers against your cheek. You lean into his touch, yet the tenderness is short-lived; with that same hand, he then grabs your neckâhis grip firm, but not tightâand leans down to press his mouth to yours while holding you in place. His lips are soft, warmâyou close your eyes and try to revel in the comforting feeling of your skin against his, but that too doesnât last long. He lets you go, smiling still, and tucks a few strands of stray hair that have come undone from your hairdo behind your ear. You look up at him from under thick lashes, trying your best not to lose your composure, yet something in your gaze apparently gives you away. As his eyes meet yours, his smile slowly fades and he raises a brow ever so slightly, puzzled countenance inconspicuous to all but you.Â
âMy lord, would you have the maids prepare theâoof,â you hear your lady-in-waiting start to say, only to be abruptly cut off as she trips over her own feet and bumps into you. Your body sways with the impact, not enough for you to fall, but with just about the force required for your torso to slightly bend over.
Clang.
All those present turn to the source of the metallic sound in the otherwise quiet room, you included, and upon seeing the object that now lays on the floor, so close it almost comes into contact with the tip of your shoe, the already cold blood in your veins congeals into iceâthe key. You had hurriedly cleaned it and stuffed it under your petticoat before leaving the study with your lady-in-waiting in tow so you could later get rid of it while no one was watching, yet it seems that plan is now no longer an option. You press your lips together and slowly turn your head to the side, tentatively glancing at your lover, and what you see causes any remnants of color to drain from your already pale face. Any semblance of joy in his expression has completely vanished as his now darkened eyes glare fixedly at the unassuming piece of metal by your feet. Without uttering a word, he leans down and picks it up. The atmosphere is so thick you could cut it with a knife; no one dares break the foreboding silence, and all you can hear is the now painfully loud ticking of the grandfather clock adorning the grand foyer.
âHow⌠curious,â he finally says, voice low, seemingly calm, yet your trained ear can discern the underlying anger. You gulp uncomfortably and wipe your sweaty hands on the skirt of your house dress, eyes never leaving his face, studying every twitch of his muscles. âHas the key to my drawer created a life of its own, I wonder? There can surely be no other explanation. How else would it have made its way here? Unless of courseâŚâ he raises his head to meet your stare, and you instinctively recoil at the seething ire building up underneath his otherwise impassive visage, âit had some help.â
âIâŚâ you stutter, your throat completely dry, causing your voice to crack and come out raspy, so hushed it is barely above a whisper. You turn to your lady-in-waiting, brows knitting together in your desperation, but she doesnât look back at you, coldly avoiding your gaze. All the other servants watch you silently, apprehensively, exchanging knowing glances. âTheâthe laundry basket. It could have been thrown in there. Transferred from one pocket to the otherâŚâ You clench your fists, nails digging into your palms, and as a surge of blind panic rises within you, wild and unruly, you start feeling nauseous and light-headed, your trembling knees threatening to give out. âIf not that, thenâI donât know⌠I canât think of any other reason why Iâd have itâŚâ
âOh?â His fury becoming increasingly more difficult to subdue, the flames of anger now lick through Astarionâs eyes; you can see yourself reflected in them, one of the boons he so lovingly extended to you, and despite knowing how lucky you are for having never been required to let go of your own image, staring back at your pathetic, quivering frame makes you wish for a moment you were like the other spawn, with whom he would refuse to share his ascended blessingsâyet as soon as the thought crosses your mind, you shun your own petty egotism, for you know how much he has sacrificedâhow much you have both sacrificedâto ensure neither you nor him would have to hide in the shadows ever again. âIs that right? I suppose that could be possible. Except,â he scowls, and you feel all hairs on your body stand on end in anticipation for what you predict will come next, âthat doesnât explain why it smells of your blood, of all things. Does it, darling?â
This is it. You always knew it was pointless to come up with excuses, yet you tried to deceive him anyway, foolishly both underestimating and defying the person whom you were supposed to trust the most. Your eyes ashamedly leave his face and you lower your gaze, not bothering to answerâat this point, there is nothing you could say that would avert or deescalate the situation. Youâve made your bed, and now must lie in it. After all this time, after all youâve been through, to think youâd still betray him, lie to him; it is despicable, indefensible.Â
âTo the boudoir. Now.â Each word he articulates drips with contempt, the hostility in his voice now undeniable. Your eyes sting as the tears start to form and bead your lashes, blurring your vision. Shame, guilt, fear, regretâthe unsightly commingling of emotions comes to a head, making you feel unworthy of even being in his presence.
âIââ
âI was not asking, darling.â He grabs your wrist as he says this, his grasp so strong youâre afraid he may dislocate it. You let out a yelp, and he turns your hand around, exposing the bright red papercut at the base of your thumb, maculating the thin, sensitive skin between it and your palm. It no longer bleeds, but even your enhanced vampiric healing talents have not been enough to allow the still fresh wound to close in the short time that has transpired since it was inflicted upon your flesh. As you anxiously raise your eyes to meet his gaze, your heart sinks at the realization that he is not only furiousâhe is hurt. He is scared. He is heartbroken.Â
âAstarion, pleaseââ you try to say, but he doesnât let you finish, closing his fingers around your upper arm and forcefully dragging you across the foyer. The servants know well not to follow; they say nothing as you both make your way down the main hall, Astarionâs feet heavily striking the ground with every step, and you treading close behind, stumbling and trying to keep pace with him. Youâre unsure what to think, unsure what to feel. While he was always prone to outbursts of anger, you have never before seen him react so viscerally to anythingânot like this, not even in his most vulnerable moments. You know him better than you know yourself, maybe even better than he knows himself; in the many years youâve spent in each otherâs arms, you have always been able to read his every expression, decipher his every thoughtâbut this, this you donât understand. Itâs novel, foreign, terrifying.Â
âAstarionâŚâ As the two of you turn a corner, finally no longer within the servantsâ line of sight, you try to speak once more, fighting back the tears. âPleaseâŚâ you whimper, your forlorn supplications going unanswered, unheeded, as if never uttered at all. âPlease⌠youâre hurting meâŚâ
As soon as the words leave your lips, he abruptly stops, and you feel his grip on your arm tighten. When he turns around to face you, you cower at the wrath you had never before seen manifest with such intensity in his eyes, and mixed with it, although less discernible, fearâraw, violent and hellacious. His pupils are blown wide, his jaw clenched, and the loud thumping of his heart sounds like an accusation, a condemnation of your wretched selfishness. It now only beats once more because of you; because of your complacence, your foolishness, your blithering, pitiful neediness. You wanted him to love you, feared that heâd leave you, and while telling yourself it was because you wanted him to be happy, you sentenced him to eternal guilt. All the sacrifice, all the hurt⌠and now youâd turn your back on him? Youâd make light of the bond of trust you had so earnestly forged and nourished throughout the yearsâthe only reason why you both live still?
âI am hurting you?â Astarion hisses through his teeth, letting go of your arm only to use that same hand to fiercely grab your throat and shove you onto the sill of a nearby window, forcing you to lean against it in a half-seated position, yet at the same time cradling the back of your head with his other hand to cushion the impact. âYou come uninvited into my study, rummage through my things, lie to me about itâyet Iâm the one hurting you? Do you even hear yourself?â He straddles you and brings his face close to yours, his nails digging into your neck, squeezing it to the point of slightly choking you.Â
â...Youâyouâre the one whoâs lyingâŚâ you manage to say between pants and squeaks, for despite having no need to breathe, it is difficult for you to talk or emit any sounds at all with your windpipes crushed under his grasp. âYouâve been lying to me⌠all this timeâŚâ He buries his fingers deeper into your skin, but that doesnât stop you from finishing, it doesnât prevent the impending disaster about to strike. âIâm not your spawn⌠I never was.â
You donât know what has come over you, but the words are spoken before you can swallow them. Astarion seems as taken aback as you are at your defianceâhe looks stunned for a few seconds, yet as soon as he recovers, his eyes narrow and glow with sanguineous intent, a darkness so ghoulish and vile festering deep within them that for a moment, you become genuinely frightened. His hand lets go of your neck to then aggressively pull at the hair on top of your scalp, forcibly tilting your head upwards, and he slams the other on the wall next to the window, entrapping you against it.
âNo, darling, you are my spawn. My spawn. Mine. Your body, your mind, your soul, they all belong to me. Iâve made you. You are mine to use however I please,â he growls, spitting each word with viperous malice.
Before you can react to this, or even begin to process what is happening, shock waves are sent through your body in the wake of the lancinating pain that suddenly shoots up your throat as he violently sinks his fangs into the hollow at its base. You let out a soundless gasp and your eyes widen in shock, the tears that had been threatening to fall finally streaming down your cheeks. Him feeding on you is a daily occurrence, something you were supposed to already be entirely used to, but never before had he been so forceful, never before had it hurt this much. He sucks with such vigor and so sloppily that the blood spills from the corners of his mouth, dripping down his chin and onto the white fabric of your clothes, speckling them red. His fingers remain tangled in your hair, keeping your head in place as he drinks, and your hairdo partly unravels. You are unable to move, unable to speak, unable to think, even, but not unable to feel: you feel shame, you feel guilt, you feel remorse, for betraying him when trust was the only thing you could ever offer, the only thing that was even left.
âIâm sorryâŚâ you lament, your voice so quiet you are unsure if he is even able to hear you, so you say it one more time. And then another. And you keep repeating it, no matter how much it hurts, no matter how much effort it takes to voice each word, you apologize again and again hoping your feelings will somehow reach him, hoping he will somehow understand how ashamed you are of yourself, how regretful you feel, how deeply you love himâand you do, you love him, so profoundly that life to you has no meaning without him by your side. If you could breathe, he would be the air in your lungs; if your heart could beat, he would be the lifeblood coursing through your veins. He is your sire, your darling, your masterâhe is your everything. In hurting him, you hurt yourself, and in breaking his trust, you destroy the very foundation of your existence.Â
Iâm sorry. Forgive me. I love you.
As your crimson runs down his throat, Astarion can feel it. Your anguish. Your sorrow. All of it. He can feel them so intensely, that itâs as if your feelings are his ownâand they are, for he too feels scared, he too feels ashamed, he too loves you, just as desperately, just as ardently. He is scared of losing you, ashamed of hurting you, and the love you share has ascended to such heights that it needs not be voiced, it needs not be reaffirmed. Nothing terrifies him as much as the idea of being apart from you, and heâd do anything to keep you close; if that implies lying to you, inflicting pain on you, then heâll gladly embrace the shame, for he never thought himself worthy of your love to begin with. And despite it all, youâd still have himâyouâd still join him in immortality, trust him beyond reason, bow down and accept your position below him, for power is all he has ever known, all that has ever mattered, and wielding power over you is his only way of ensuring you will never be taken from him.Â
I want you. I need you. Donât leave me.
The tears you shed fall from your eyes and drip onto Astarionâs face as if wept by him; the sensation brings him back to reality, and as the fog clears, he is relentlessly assailed by the regret welling up within his heart. Finally unlatching his mouth from your neck, he slowly lifts his head up to look into your eyes, releasing his grip on your hair and using the newly freed hand to wipe his lips and chin, which are now smeared with bloodâwith that same hand, he then cups your cheek, gently brushing his thumb against your skin, and in doing so, painting a red streak across it.
âForgive me⌠please forgive meâŚâ you plead between soft sobs, the teardrops uncontrollably pouring and mixing with your crimson. Cupping your cheek still, he uses his other hand to dry the now ruby-colored beads, his caresses ever so tender, ever so gentle. Although the darkness has not entirely faded from his eyes, it is eclipsed by the genuine warmth blooming on their dewy surface. He rests his forehead against yours, sliding his fingers which are now wet from the bloody droplets down your shoulders, gliding them across your ribs, tracing the curve of your waist, your hip. His touches are so incredibly delicate, tentative almost, that itâs as if you were made out of porcelain and applying the slightest amount of pressure would cause you to break into a thousand pieces.
âShh. Itâs over, my love. Itâs over.â He is so close to you that his breath tickles your face and his lips graze yours as he speaks, the soothing tone of his voice lulling your frenzied mind. After hesitating for a split second, his wandering digits venture further down, toying with the hemline of your dress, hiking the bloodstained fabric up just enough to expose the waxen skin of your thigh, only to then slip under it. A shiver of anticipation runs down your spine, and still unsure what to make of his advances, you let your eyes fall shut, savoring the moment as if waiting for the spell to break, as if the illusion is about to shatter, yet it doesnâtâinstead, he finally closes the distance between you, covering your mouth with his and spreading your crimson that still trickles down his jaw all over you both. As you kiss, some of it makes its way onto your tongue, the coppery flavor so very familiar, for your blood is one and the same, and tasting yourself is as if tasting him.
âThat's what you want, isn't it? To be mine? Forever?â
His lips never leaving yours, Astarion moves his hand on your cheek to the side of your head so he can run his fingers through your hair, brushing it out of your face, now damp from your blood only as the tears slowly dry. The hand under your dress finds its way to your backside, splaying across its soft curve and slightly lifting you up from the windowsill, supporting your weight as he leans his body into yours to pin you against the glass. You hold onto his shoulders with both of your hands and wrap your legs around his waist to keep yourself from slipping, bringing him closer and pushing his crotch flush against your stomach; doing so allows you to feel the obvious erection under his pants, which you hadnât yet noticed was there. While this would be a common effect of feeding under other circumstances, it startles you at first, flusters you almost, yet the reason for his sudden wantonness notwithstanding, even if you canât fully understand it, what you do know is that the two of you may need this just as urgentlyâto lose yourselves in lust and hunger, feel each other, be reassured that you are both still here, that you are both still real.Â
Letting out a low groan, he starts leisurely rolling his hips, burying the fully hardened bulge between your thighs. No less eager to touch him, you rock your own in rhythm with his movements, to which your body responds more willingly than what either of you would have anticipated, heat pooling in your abdomen and wetness collecting between your folds, some of which soaks through your underpantsâthe sweet scent of your budding arousal encourages him to keep going, and the fingers of his hand propping up your behind reach out for their waistband, slipping under the lacy fabric and pulling at it. With some effort he is able to get them to slide down a little, but not enough to expose your aching sex; deciding to try a different approach instead, he untangles his other hand from your hair and uses it to pull his own pants down, freeing his already leaking cock. Were this any other day, he would have taken his time teasing you, building you both up to the edge only to pull away at the last minute and start all over again, but not this time. Never before had Astarionâs urgency to take you been this great; never before had he felt like he must make you his as quickly as possible, lest you are forever lost to him.
Lifting up your petticoat to gain access to your still clothed core, he slides his cock under it, your underpants now the only layer separating your flesh from his. You moan against his lips at the sensation, and he takes the opportunity to deepen the kiss, slipping his warm tongue inside your partially open mouth. As the petticoat falls back down, he has his freed hand join the other, using both to cradle your ass, his long digits groping and fondling the soft skin. While rolling his tongue over yours, he resumes his hip movements, massaging your dripping slit with his length and squeezing even more slick out of you, drenching the fabric that envelops it in your juices; due to the friction and the wetness, the flimsy piece of cloth starts wrinkling and sliding to the side, revealing more of your swollen folds with each thrust. Noticing this, he tilts his pelvis, angling himself to help push it out of the way, and it doesnât take long before your skin finally comes into contact with hisâonce it does, you jerk your hands away from his shoulders to then wrap your arms tightly around his neck, and he avidly sucks on your bottom lip, fighting off the urge to sink his fangs into it, drawing even more of your blood.
Wet as you are, he glides effortlessly along your now partially naked mound, gently nudging your twitching entrance with the velvety tip of his cock, only to then back away slowly, spreading your folds apart and massaging the engorged bud atop them as he moves. Although his pace is languid, you can tell by his small grunts that he is growing more desperate, more impatient; once your mouths unweave, a thin string of saliva forming between your bruised, reddened lips, you are unwittingly sucked into the endless vortex of passion and yearning lurking within his crimson irises, his feelings flooding into your own heart as you lock eyes with him. Without you, there is nothingâwithout you, he is nothing. He offered you eternal life, and in return, you promised him eternal love; you cannot, you will not back away now. Only by feeling you, tasting you, ruining you can he convince himself that you remain within his reach, that you belong to him still. The intensity of his gaze overwhelms you, yet as you turn your head to the side to avoid it, he brings one of his hands up from under your dress and grasps your chin, forcing it back into its previous position.
âEyes on me, darling,â Astarion says, his voice soft, but his tone firm, commanding; as if under a spell, you obey unquestioningly, staring back at him as intently as you can manage while he grinds against the raw, sensitive skin of your center, sliding along the wetness between your puffed folds and coating his cock in your sticky essence, the lewd squelching noises that ensue echoing in the empty hallway. Now increasing the tempo of his thrusts, he presses his throbbing cockhead harder and harder against your cunt with every jerk of his hips, threatening to stretch its tight borders open only to then pull back, the agonizing anticipation of it setting your nerves on fire. The coiling tension in your abdomen grows tauter by the minute, begging for release, and you can no longer feel the searing pain of the gaping wound on your neck, your mind shamelessly burdened with naught but thoughts of himâof how much you love him, how much you want him, how desperately you need him inside you, buried soul-deep, filling you to the brim.Â
His appetites mirror your own, for he too craves nothing more than to have you wrapped around him, ready and primed for him to use however he wishes, for you are his, and that is his prerogativeâbut first, he would have you come undone, watch as you crumble into nothing at his behest. Without ever breaking eye contact, not wanting to miss a second of your unraveling, he pounds into the outer edges of your entrance with ever increasing furor, dipping his cockhead deeper within it each time, while simultaneously holding back the overwhelming urge to stuff you full in a single thrust. He can tell you are close, so close; as you have not fed since morning, the color of your flushed cheeks is not nearly as bright as it would have otherwise been, but he can still hear itâwhat little remains of your cold blood rushing through your veins, frantically flowing to your face and cunt, puffing up your skin and painting it a pale pink.Â
Youâre a vision like this, parted lips reddened with dried blood, half-lidded eyes curtained by long wet lashes, nipples pebbling under the thin chiffon of your bodice; his pretty consort, his sweet spawn, his good girl, so foolishly trusting, so naively kind. When did he lose sight of you? When did your blind devotion turn into treacherous cynicism? When did the desire to bring you to heel consume him, when did the darkness within start to take hold? As these thoughts sweep through his mind, Astarion forfeits all self-controlâhe needs to feel you, deeper, closer; conquer your soul, dominate your body, devour you whole. He plunges into you without warning, reveling in the feeling of your tight cunt fluttering and contracting around his cock, creaming and coating him in your sweet come, as having him finally buried deep inside you pushes you over the edge of your release. You shut your eyes close and let your head fall back, only for him to firmly grab your jaw and force it up again, intent on having you face him as you dissolve into pleasure.
âBeautiful,â he purrs, the look in his eyes expressing adoration and subjugation in equal measure. âMy sweet girl. My good girl.â Holding your jaw still, he slides in and out of your spasming slit without giving you time to recover from your orgasm, and the pain from the overstimulation overlaps with the high of the afterglowârather than shun the sensation, you welcome it, for its paradoxical nature at once grounds and comforts you; the greater the pain, the more intensely you can feel him, the more entangled your souls become. The fingers of the hand still holding your ass tighten their grip, pushing your hips against his, tilting them to allow his cock to sink as deeply within you as possible. Although he refuses to avert his gaze, looking upon you with bone-chilling fierceness, the sweat beading his forehead and the growing fervor of his lust-ridden expression give away his ascent to his own rapture. To him, there is no greater bliss than feeling you clench around him as he massages your slickened walls, his velvety tip ever so slightly brushing against the spongy skin of your cervix with every thrust. He belongs inside you, and you belong to him; your body is more his than yours, your heart less yours than his.
âAll mine,â he grunts between ragged breaths, the thought of you completely submitting to him, letting yourself be ravaged and debauched for his pleasure alone racing through Astarionâs mind as he reaches his climax, spilling himself all over your walls and flooding you with his warm seed. His hand that had been keeping your jaw in place lets go of it to then splay across the side of your face, affectionately caressing your cheek, and he finally lets his eyes wander away from yours, lowering his head to nuzzle into the crook of your neck while basking in his release; yet the moment is short-lived, for once he catches sight of the still bleeding mess right below his nose, two crimson gashes carved on the pale skin of your throat, his mind suddenly freezes and his gorge rises. All hisâbut at what cost? Was this what you wished for? Was this what he wished for? You agreed to eternity, accepted your share of the burden, became his of your own volition; but doesnât a toy become useless once itâs broken? Doesnât love turn into hate once itâs ruined? He knew the time would come when youâd finally see him for who he truly is, when the pathetic, repulsive rot festering under the husk of shallow charm would be laid bare before you, but why now, when he had gathered enough power to offer you the world and everything in it? Was not even that enough to keep you by his side? Feeling you squirm under him, hearing your pained whimpers and tearful pleasâhe was not supposed to take joy in any of it, yet his body would betray his mind as he drained you dry. The more you pull away, the more his obsession grows; the more you try to escape, the less you are likely to get away. So why would you reject a fate you had once embraced? Were you his obedient girl no longer? Would you doom yourself, doom your love, let the dam in his living heart burst and the murky waters within consume you, him, and all in their wake?
âI already have everything. Except you by my side.â
You wince as Astarion pulls out of you, the sensitive flesh of your core now red and tender, slathered with his thick come, which runs down your entrance and onto your thighs. Raising his head back up, he brings his face close to yours, tenderly pressing his lips to the corner of your mouth, his hand on your cheek lingering for a moment before making its way downwards, sliding under your petticoat and reaching for the space between your legs. Once his fingers come into contact with your still exposed wetness, you instinctively roll your hips into the long digits, eliciting a faint smile from him; however, rather than indulging you, he grasps the wrinkled fabric of your underpants, so drenched they have stayed put on your groin ever since being pushed there, and smoothens it as best as he can to cover your dripping sex. Planting another kiss on your bloodstained skin and lovingly rubbing his forehead and nose against yours, he uses that same hand to tuck his softening cock back inside his pants; with one last peck on your temple, he then moves his other hand away from its place on your rear to wrap both of his arms around your waist, hoisting you up. No longer pinned against the glass, legs still around his midriff and arms around his neck, you tighten your grip on him to keep yourself from falling, leaning your upper body forward and resting your chin on his shoulder.
âGood girl,â he coos, bringing one of his hands up to cradle your head and affectionately run his fingers through your hair. Backing away from the window, he then turns around and sets off towards the living quarters, all the while carrying you as if you were unable to walk on your own. Not bothering to question his reasons, you close your eyes, intent on enjoying his uncharacteristic gentleness while it lasts and surrendering to the overwhelming allure of his warmth, his scent, his soothing touch and the soft thumping of his heart, which you can feel with your chest flush against his, as if it beats for the two of you. The familiar aegis of his embrace offers solace and protection in equal measure, and for however long he holds you, you feel safe, you feel loved, and nothing else mattersânot the guilt, not his darkness, not your selfishness.
âAstarionâŚâÂ
You whisper his name as if chanting a mantra, not really for any other purpose than to comfort yourself. The throbbing pain on your neck, the unpleasant sensation of your fluids and his drying on your thighs, the blood all over your face, hair and clothes; somehow, you care about none of it while in his arms, feeling your body rock gently as he moves, the world an endless void behind your shut eyelids. Before the moment ends, itâs just you and him, him and youâno souls weighing down on either of you other than your own, no phantoms from the past lingering in your memory, no outside voices joining in the chorus and challenging your undying love. The voices within remain, however, loud as ever, questioning if youâve been forgiven, pondering if youâd even deserve it; while he has yet to let go, they have no power over you, but youâre no stranger to the ephemeral nature of his tenderness. Be that as it may, what scares you more than anything are not the loud accusations echoing on the surface, but rather the quiet murmurs rousing in the depths of your heartâthose suggesting that time will erode his essence, stripping him off everything but the desire to consume you.
âIâm willing to share all of this with you. Whatâs that, if not love?â
âBring me clean towels and lukewarm water. Make it quick.â His voice sounds muffled as you drift in and out of consciousness, and for the first time you notice you canât feel the tips of your fingers, the blood loss clearly too great a challenge for even your undead body to overcome. The servant whom he is addressing answers something you canât quite make out, and with a reverent nod, turns away and takes her leave. You slightly open your eyes to get your bearings, and the first thing you see once they adjust to the sudden brightness is the ornately hand-carved frame surrounding the door to your private chambers, its gilded accents glinting in the light of the candelabra, left behind you as Astarion makes his way further inside the room. Upon reaching the grand canopy bed, draped with opulent velvet curtains, he gently lays you down onto the soft mattress, using the hand still tangled in your hair to support your head. The instant you part with his warm touch, the ever constant coldness of death seeps through your skin, its icy tendrils grazing the fringes of your soul; the sudden loss is, however, somewhat subdued when he then circles the bed and sits down by your side, bringing his fingers to your face to glide their soft pads across your brow, studying your features in reflective silence.
âMy lord.â No sooner has she left than the servant is back with a pile of plush cotton towels in her arms, one of your handmaidens following close behind, carrying a wooden wash tub that looks far too heavy for her scrawny frame. You prick up your ears at the sound of the familiar voice, and upon discreetly raising your eyes to take a better look at her, you recognize said servant as none other than your lady-in-waiting; it strikes you as no mere coincidence that sheâd been waiting for your arrival with the necessary provisions ready, but you decide not to dwell on it. Likewise, there is no effort on her part to acknowledge you as she sets the towels on the eiderdown duvet, gesturing to the handmaiden to put the wash tub down near the bed.
âLeave us,â Astarion says, addressing them both yet not for a moment letting his eyes drift away from yours. Each gives a brief curtsy before doing as told, carefully closing the door behind them on their way out. Once theyâre gone, he reaches out for the towel on top of the pile and dips one of its edges in the clear water inside the tub, letting it soak for a few seconds before pulling it back out. Remaining silent and with his gaze fixed upon you, he then brings the now drenched cloth to his own face and rubs it against his mouth and chin, removing the crimson still spattered over his skin with relative ease. You timidly meet his stare from under thick lashes, feeling a bit faint, your limbs heavy and numb from the lack of blood within your veins.
â...Astarion,â you tentatively call for him, your voice so low you wonder for a moment if he is even able to hear you at all; rather than answering you, he places a finger on your lips, hushing you gently. His jaw now rid of stains, he lays the bloodied towel aside and grabs another, soaking it as he did the first, only this time, he presses it to your cheek instead. The damp fabric feels soft and warm against your gelid complexion, and he dabs at it so delicately, so soothingly, that you find yourself leaning into his touch. Your eyelids start threatening to fall shut again, your mind bereft of all thought, but just as you are about to nod off, he starts speaking, snapping you out of your torpor. Â
âI never lied to you. Not really.â As the words leave his lips, Astarionâs eyes darken with an intensity you canât quite make sense of. Deeming your face to be satisfactorily clean, he lowers the towel to massage the pale skin of your throat, letting his gaze wander away from yours to rest upon the grisly puncture marks left by his own fangs. âYou are my spawn. My creation. Born from my blood,â he says, the softness in his voice contrasting with the sobriety of his words and the somberness of his expression. After pausing for a moment, not so much out of hesitation as to stall the inevitable, he continues, finally unearthing that which had been hidden for so long with confounding casualness, the revelation likely to have gone by unnoticed if meant for slightly less attentive ears. âMy consortâmy bride.â
Neither of you utter another word in the minutes that follow. He remains focused on your neck, undoing the top buttons of your bodice to gain better access to it, thus baring your shoulders and collarbone, carefully patting the towel around the ruptured flesh and wiping the encrusted blood off its swollen borders. You, on the other hand, can do anything but focus, unable to process what has just been exposed or the significance of it. Your body is like a dollâs under his; you do not blink, muscles stiffened and chest unmoving, an inanimate object with no will of its ownâbut you do have a will of your own, do you not? If the letter is to be given any credence to, then wouldnât the implication be that he let you believe that he could control you when he in fact could not? And if soâwhat were you to call it then, if not a lie? Did he not trust you to stay? (Had he no trust in your bond?) Was that the source of his fear? (Were you the source of his fear?)
âIs it true, then?â you hear yourself ask, your mouth moving on its own as you let the surge of emotion guide your actions in the absence of coherent thought. âCan you really not compel me? Am I free to do as I please?â Despite the quiet pitch of your voice, and although it trembles ever so faintly, there is a hint of what Astarion can only discern as resentment laced with it. He suddenly stops moving, the now red towel in his hands still pressed against your skin, remaining motionless for a moment before slowly raising his head to lock eyes with youâand there it is again, that raw, visceral dread, only this time masked with a thin veil of arrogance. Â
âOh, sweet thing. Shouldnât you know it by now?â His lips slightly curl into a humorless smile, voice smooth as silk, yet the words are spoken with deliberate inflection, eerily measured and dangerously sharp. He discards the towel, having it join the other, and casts a predatory gaze upon you, leaning down until the tip of his nose is only inches apart from yours. Bringing both of his hands to your face, he then gently cups your cheeks, fondly caressing them with his thumbs. âIâm the Vampire Ascendant, bound by no such petty rules. That some meddling busybody would underestimate me is not surprising, but I expected more from my good girl.â To your disconcert, although he says this, glimmers of affection peek through the shadows lurking within his eyes. âIâve spoiled you.âÂ
You look up at him in confusion, brows lowered and drawn together, trying and yet failing to read his expression. The smile stays on his lips for a moment, but before long, any warmth in his countenance suddenly vanishes. Your heart sinks to the bottom of your stomach in anticipation, your bodyâs primal response signaling the imminent threat, but like a mouse caught in a trap, you are helpless, pinned under him in more ways than one. As you lose yourself in the ruby red pools of his irises, the subtle scent of his cologne, that intoxicating brew of bergamot, rosemary and brandy, grows stronger and more concentrated, filling your nose and wafting down your throat. And then, you feel itâa tingling sensation in your fingers, climbing up your arms, spreading to your ribs and chest. It builds up, intensifies, until it is no longer tingling, but shooting pain, radiating outwards in searing waves. Your every muscle screams in protest, throbbing and burning and aching, but when you try to move your limbs, you find them unresponsive; neither can you open your mouth when you try to scream, not even close your eyes once you feel them brim with tears, which then roll down your temples.
âAhâahâŚ!â
âShh. Donât fight it, my love. Itâll be over soon.â Astarion says as he softly dries the falling droplets with his thumbs, the words slipping from his pretty lips in dulcet whispers. Once you heed his advice and stop struggling, the pain subsidesâyou remain, however, a passenger in your own body, unable to do anything but stare into his eyes. Within them, the fear still lingers, but it no longer muddies its bloody waters, suppressed by the confidence now sprouting in their depths; and thatâs when you notice that this is to him as much of a novelty as it is to you. Despite his haughtiness, he couldnât have been sure that it would work, for he had never attempted such a feat before. But alas, any concerns prove now unfoundedâyou are, and were always his thrall. His puppet bride, subject to his every whim.
âMy dark consort. My right hand. My most beloved spawn.â
The compulsion persists for no more than a few minutes, but once he finally loosens his hold on you, it feels as if itâs been hours since last your body was yours to command. With a loud gasp, sucking in the air desperately as if your undead lungs would have any use for it, you are back in control, for what thatâs even worth now. Pressing his forehead to yours, he hushes you tenderly, breathing words of comfort as if soothing your unrest after a bad dream. Tears continue pouring from your eyes even as they fall shut, yet the source of your grief is unclear; your mind is, however, in too great a turmoil to allow you to sort out your feelings, so you try to focus on his touch instead, yielding to it as he moves one of his hands from its place on your cheek to lovingly brush your hair away from your face. Regardless, the moment lasts only for so longâonce you are no longer as agitated, he pulls away, his expression undecipherable, an uncanny blend of darkness and placidity, dolefulness and sobriety.
âPay attention, my dear, for this is an offer I will make but once,â he says, the danger in his voice underlying its velvety slickness, reflecting the ambiguous glint in his eyes. As you open your own, you see him take and soak another towel from the pile, which he then brings to your neck to continue removing the dried blood, by now almost completely gone from your skin, yet staining your clothes still. âFreedom. Thatâs what you wish for, isnât it?â Smiling bitterly, he undoes the remaining buttons of your bodice, exposing the narrow valley between your breasts, yet his gaze remains drawn to the fresh set of bite marks on your throat; he seems distracted for a moment, but soon enough, his lips continue moving, the tone with which he speaks taking on a deceptively poised quality. âSay the word and I shall unmake our bond. Refuse, and resign to your fate as my eternal spawn.â
Astarion doesnât look your way even as he tells you this, focusing on the wound stillâa manifestation of his inner demons, the sigil of a man who chose to fully embrace the shadows, and whose only remaining light he now tries to dim. Oh, how he wishes the illusion would have lasted forever; you in his arms, eternally his, a bird singing beautifully in its gilded cage. Not clipping your wings was his biggest mistake, for he had always feared that sooner or later, youâd give into the desire to soar high, leave him to waste away, consumed by power and shame. So now he opens the cage himself, before you lose your voice, before the song is silenced. He wants to see it, he needs to see itâhear your denial, feel your rejection, taste your betrayal. Whether he means what he says is inconsequential, for he himself knows not the answer to that; his wish is but to have you confirm what he already understands to be true, so that he may finally snuff out that trembling flame and surrender to lonesome oblivion.
Your answer to him is, however, nothing but silence; having by now wiped most of the stains off your neck area, he straightens his torso, and his eyes finally make their way back to yoursâwhich, to his astonishment, are not only misty and glistening with the tears still pooling in their corners and flowing down your cheeks, but wide and unblinking, unrelenting terror etched across your face. Terror? Why terror? No, no, this makes no sense. Is he to believe youâre crying tears of happiness? Could these be complicated feelings surfacing now that youâve finally been given that which youâd always wished for? Freedomâthat is what you wish for, surely? He never doubted your love, for he could feel it just as you could feel his, but he did question whether just love would be enough to keep you by his side, whether even a love as real as yours would stand the test of time. Never had he been able to understand your love for him, but he knew it to be true, and he would protect it in whatever way he could; as the Ascendant, there was very little he could not do, thus taking away your freedom was the obvious course of action. And yet, now that he offers it back, you react not with relief or gratitude, but terror?
âI would sooner die again,â you finally say, voice quiet and strained, raw emotion pouring from your every word. Astarion stares at you in complete shock, frozen in place, and time seems to come to a standstill while each of you wait for the other to break the silence. As he disconcertedly studies your face, trying to make sense of your unexpected fretfulness, a realization dawns on himâare you perhaps afraid of spending eternity by yourself? Is it not his promise of making you into a full vampire, independent of its creator, but rather the prospect of total separation that upsets you so? That must be it, that has to be itâwhy else would the offer of freedom, that which has always driven him, the ultimate goal, sound so appalling to your ears? Although it is no less surprising that you wouldnât use your newfound autonomy to turn your back on him at the first opportunity, as far as his proposal is concerned, this is but a misunderstanding; he should clarify, then.
âYouââ
Donât leave me. Please donât leave me.
Your words ring in Astarionâs ears as if spoken by you, yet your quivering lips remain sealed. Hah! How quaint, that such an ability would manifest now. As your thoughts flow from you to him, he notices you donât seem to be aware that you are speaking into his mind. Of course not, why would you? He had kept the nature of your bond a secret, and thus, your mental connection was too concealed. Oftentime youâd unwittingly let your inner voice seep into his head, but never had you noticed, and never had he brought it to your attention. It feels invasive, peeking into your heart when you havenât let him in, but he canât help himself, for he needs to know; he needs to be certain that this is what you want, that this is the fate youâve chosen, no matter how grim, no matter how hopeless. Â
I promise Iâll be good. I need you. Please.
Raising your upper body into a seated position, you reach out for his arm, and your fingers tentatively grasp at the sleeve of his shirt. You canât bring yourself to voice your feelings, yet you hope that the earnestness in your tear-filled eyes somehow is enough to convince him of your sincerity, for the thought alone of having your souls ripped asunder horrifies you. You had accepted your circumstances once, and youâd do so againâbearing the guilt and remaining his spawn for the rest of your days is too low a price to pay for his freedom, for his life, for him. All for him. It always was, it always will be. You failed him once; not again. Never again. For however long heâll have you, youâll remain by his side, pay your penance, atone for your sins, love him with all of you, body, mind and soul, until thereâs nothing left but dust and blood.Â
As the confusion in his eyes gives way to gentle warmth, Astarion brings one of his hands to your face, tenderly cradling it and brushing his long fingers against the damp skin. After letting go of the towel which he had been holding still, he leans forward, pausing for a moment to meet your weepy gaze before pressing his pillowy lips to yours, and relief washes over you like a balm. You relax your muscles which you hadnât noticed were tensed until now, and although you have yet to stop crying, the salty droplets are no longer an expression of fear and regret, but of succor and deliverance. Timidly starting with a sequence of soft, chaste pecks, the kiss gradually becomes more sensual, more passionate, and soon you feel his tongue flick at your bottom lip, asking for passage. Once you comply, he begins eagerly exploring the inside of your mouth, the digits of his other hand running through your hair as he tastes you, unweaving what still remains of your hairdo and letting the tresses fall over your shoulders. Longing to be as close to him as physically possible, you tighten your grip on his sleeve, lovingly nuzzling your nose and cheeks against his, and in doing so, making them wet with your tears.Â
Kissing you still, he untangles his fingers from your now freed locks and splays his hand across the small of your back, using his body weight to gently pin you down until you are both lying on the mattress, him on top of you. The hand on your cheek leaves it to reach for the last towel in the pile, which he then blindly soaks in the water remaining within the wash tub; your skin now completely rid of bloodstains, he sticks it under your petticoat instead, bringing it to your groin and tugging at your underpants with one of his digits. This time successfully managing to get them to slide down enough to gain access to your wetness, he delicately presses the soaked cloth to it, eliciting a soft mewl from you. All the while massaging your mouth with his, he rubs the towel up and down the still tender flesh of your sex, thus removing the remnants of earlier activities, yet at the same time nudging your slowly swelling clit with every stroke. Feeling the familiar tautness building up low in your belly, you roll your hips into his hand, squeezing your thighs together and clenching them around his arm, any pretenses of playing coy completely discarded as you helplessly plead for his touch.
Rather than mess around with you like he would on any other occasion, Astarion yields, and as two of his fingers feel up and circle the now twitching bundle of nerves through the wet fabric, another slides further down and rims your slickened entrance. You wantonly whimper against his lips, wrapping both of your arms around his neck, and his hand on your back makes its way to the front of your torso to unfasten the lacing keeping your unbuttoned bodice in place, thus revealing your breasts and stomach. As soon as they come into view, his skilled digits quickly find one of your hardened nipples, pinching and playing with the swollen nub as his tongue continues hungrily swirling around yours and his hand between your legs fondles your aching arousal, coaxing pants and all sorts of cute noises out of you.
âSing for me, little bird,â he breaks the kiss to purr the words in your ear, fangs gently grazing your earlobe. You readily do as told, moaning and whining with your drying eyes closed, teardrops no longer escaping through your long lashes, and his face creases into a smuggish smile as he watches you writhe and squirm. Once he withdraws both of his hands, you let out a displeased sigh, in response to which his smile widens; finally tossing aside the towel, he then leans back to finish undressing you, and as you help him peel off both your dress and undergarments, you suddenly notice neither of you are wearing shoes, though you canât recall at which point they were lost. Tucking a hand inside his own pants, he pulls out his cock, still partially soft but rapidly hardening again, yet there seems to be no intention on his part of removing the rest of his clothes, a fact which neither of you seem to mindâif he would rather have you naked and exposed before him, then so be it; if he finds strength in your vulnerability, then you wonât deny it to him, for his comfort is your atonement, even if it costs you your dignity.
âYou wouldn't just be some spawnâyouâre far more than that to me.â
âCome, pretty vampling,â Astarion beckons, intertwining his fingers with yours and helping you rise to his level. Once you are both sitting up and facing each other, he tenderly kisses the back of your hand, letting go of it to then wrap his strong arms around your waist and pull your chest flush against his, squishing your soft breasts between your bodies. After planting a loving peck on your brow and affectionately rubbing your noses together, he then slightly cocks his head to the side, exposing the smooth skin of his neck, marked only by two shallow indentations, so similar, yet so different from your own. It takes you no more than that to realize what he means, and you gingerly press your mouth to a blue artery pulsating right under his jawline, looking up at him demurely with lamblike eyes, as if waiting for his approval. With an affable simper, he brings one of his hands up to cradle the back of your scalp, which you understand as an assent; parting your rosy lips, you thus brush your fangs against the throbbing vein, only to then sink them into the sensitive flesh, as gently and carefully as possible. He groans at the sensation, not from pain, but pleasure, and you feel him lightly tug at your hair.
His blood tastes rich and angular on your tongue, and your hazy mind slowly clears as the thick crimson starts spreading to your extremities. You suck so delicately that he can barely feel your fangs piercing his neckâinstead, he feels the plushness of your lips, the softness of your curves, the heat irradiating from your cold pale skin as it turns warm and flushed. He hugs you tighter, yearning to have you pressed even closer against him, letting out low grunts and quiet moans as you drink, his cock now fully hardened into an angry, painful erection. Bringing both of his hands down to your ass, he firmly squeezes your buttocks and slightly lifts up your body to sit you on his lap; following his lead, you position yourself while feeding still, bending your knees to support your weight on them and lining up your entrance with his leaking tip. However, instead of immediately lowering your hips, you start languidly rocking them back and forth, burying the engorged cockhead between your folds and coating it in your juices.
âOh, you cheeky bratâŚâ he says, yet the playful tone of his voice encourages you to keep going, even if from your position you canât see the matching expression on his face, eyes closed and a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. âGods, you feel goodâŚâ His fingers press down harder on the supple skin of your behind, and his crimson takes on a sweeter flavor the more aroused he becomes; as it flows to your center, your rouged clit too grows tumescent with desire, slick dripping from your needy cunt. Setting an agonizingly sensual pace to your rhythmic movements, you bring your hands up to rest on his shoulders, a trail of red escaping from your lips and running down your chin. You can feel his cockhead twitching madly as you engulf it in your wet heat, hungering for the tightness of your walls, but the blood high emboldens you, and you continue stubbornly refusing to give in, even if you want nothing more than to have him stuff you full.
Astarion has, however, only so much patience, and being on the receiving end of teasing doesnât sit well with him; once he feels the tip of his cock nudge the borders of your slit, he tightens his grip on your ass and yanks your body down, stretching your entrance open and sinking you to about half of his length. You unlatch your mouth from his neck and yelp in surprise, nails digging into the skin of his shoulders, but before you can say anything, he crashes his lips into yours, lapping at the blood staining them red. While you kiss, he gives you time to adjust, and his hands move up to your waist, his touch at once firm and gentle. Despite the pain of the sudden intrusion, being filled with him is pure bliss, and as your walls accommodate his size, you start almost imperceptibly undulating your hips, although the slight friction serves only to fan the flames of your desire. Upon taking notice of your shy grinding, he eggs you on, pulling you downwards with only about enough force to encourage you to follow suit. Not willing to hold back any longer, you eagerly comply, lowering your rear until you are fully seated on him, buttocks pressed against his thighs. Stifling a groan, he nips at your bottom lip and sucks on the ruby droplets seeping from the small lesion, your taste indistinguishable from his own. If youâd give yourself to him, then he shall unapologetically take that which he is owed; from the marrow in your bones to the crimson flowing through your veins, you are wholly his to consume.
âYou're the one that I wantâthe one that I love.â
âHnngâAstarionâŚâ you moan his name as your mouths come apart, so sweetly that it stirs up in him the urge to again sink his fangs into your flesh. Yet he doesnât; instead, he bucks his hips upwards, prodding your cervix with his cockhead, and an amused glint appears in his eyes as you react with a high-pitched squeal. Trying to hide the blush spreading across your face, you lean forward, resting your chin on the curve between his neck and shoulder, warm cheek pressed to his, and biting back a whimper, you timidly start sliding yourself up and down his cock. With your ear so close to his mouth, you can hear the soft grunts and shallow pants slipping from his lips whenever he disappears into you, the lewdness of it setting ablaze the waves of fire seething under your skin. Your leisure gait doesnât last long, and you ride him more energetically with each bob of your body, which he reciprocates by burying his fingers deeper into your waist and pulling you down harder, feeling the pert nubs of your plump breasts brush against his chest as they bounce.
âYouâre doing so well, little love,â Astarion says while peppering kisses across the delicate skin of your neck, sending shivers of pleasure down your spine. You can feel him pulsing inside you, bulging veins vibrating against your gummy walls as they are distended to their limit the stiffer he becomes. âSuch a good pup for me, taking me so nicely,â he coos, bringing one of his hands to your navel, gliding the pads of his digits along the soft curve of your stomach and towards the ache throbbing in your crotch, where he then grasps your flushed clit between two deft fingers, massaging the tender knot with seasoned adroitness. The sound of smacking flesh grows louder as he pushes against your hips with his own, and you sink down his cock with greater abandon the more you approach the peak of ecstasy, your body glistening with sweat and burning red with his crimson.Â
âAh! IâmâcloseâŚâ you stutter, your voice trembling as you work your thigh muscles with even greater ardor, letting go of his shoulders to lean back on your outstretched palms. With the fingers of his hand wedged between your legs, he continues stroking the rose-pink bud crowning your mound, moving the other from its place on your waist to gently squeeze one of your breasts, teasing the puckered nipple with his thumb. While watching you lose yourself in the rising crescendo of your release, he accidentally lets his gaze wander to the wound on your throat; promptly averting it, he chooses to focus instead on the luscious expression etched on your pretty face, his lifeblood blooming under your cheeks and noseâthe moment you lock eyes with him, the tension finally snaps, and you buckle your elbows as your arms go limp, walls spasming around him and creamy pearls of come leaking from your stretched entrance. Â
Spellbound by your cock-drunk image, Astarion pushes you down on the bed without warning, and cradling your face with both of his hands, pulls you into a lustful kiss, forcing your mouth open with his tongue. Still high off your climax, you donât resist, obediently parting your lips, arms wrapped around his neck and legs around his waist. Shoving his thighs against the back of yours, he bends them into a mating press, and wasting no time, starts ferociously thrusting deep into you, setting a brutal pace; your walls contract and twitch around his enlarged girth, the ripples of your orgasm yet to peter out, making vulgar sucking noises as you swallow him whole. He moans into the kiss with every roll of his hips, blood buzzing in his ears and heart pounding violently inside his chest, fucking you greedily, indulgently, minding his own pleasure and naught else. Your body sways weightlessly like a ragdollâs each time the base of his cock strikes your groin, but you care not about his rough treatment of you, for nothing brings you greater elation than knowing you can make him feel this way.
âSo tightâŚâ he growls with his mouth still pressed against yours, his voice muffled and breathy. Propping his torso up with one of his arms, he brings the hand of the other to your throat, squeezing it firmly, and pulls away to admire his handiwork, a dark intensity blazing within his eyes. âOh, darling, you look so precious with my fingers around your neck.â His silvery curls fall over his brow as he says this, tousled and dripping with sweat, his appearance at once statuesque and animalistic. He ruts into you in a disorderly fray, his movements messy and sloppy as they usually are in the short moments preceding the culmination of his desire, and with one last powerful thrust, he empties himself inside your fucked out cunt, feeling your fluttering walls clench around him, milking him to the last drop.
âSweet godsâŚâ Slumping down on top of you, he embraces your sore body and buries his face in your hair, taking in your scent as his cock continues convulsing inside your raw, tender slit, hardened still. Filled with him and his seed, nestled in his arms, you feel comfortably full, warm, safe. Your eyes fall shut, tiredness suddenly overtaking your weary mind, and although erratic thoughts run through it, you hold onto none of them, deciding to just for today, just for this night, turn a blind eye to all implications, all the ill omens, and let yourself be; be by his side, be his spawn, be his bride forever more.Â
As you drift off into a dreamless sleep, lulled by the gentle sound of his heartbeat, oblivion tenderly cradles you against its merciful bosom, and the clarity of the precipice of unconsciousness rips your burdens from your soul and makes your every worry seem so futile, so meaningless. Your fate is inevitable, as certain as death itself, and following the precepts of life is a vain undertaking, for they are not the same as those ruling over undeath. Astarion knows this; so should you. Existence is transient, but his dark love is everlasting.
There is a light in every living thing. Itâs crawling tâwards the surface to survive. And in its wake, it tramples everything. Weâll kill the rest, so that the one can thrive.
#personal#astarion#astarion x tav#bg3 fic#bg3#ascended astarion#lord astarion#astarion smut#astarion x female reader#astarion x you#astarion x reader#ascended astarion x reader#tavstarion#fic: death and his maiden#my fics
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The Boys need help
Part 1- Alfred's new help
Alfred's New Help part 2
After a "random" attack on the Wayne family, the new maid may be more than what meets the eye.
Joker caresses the side of the young boy's face with a twisted smile. Tension spreads throughout his entire upper body. Dick notices how there is a slight shake in Damien's palms. After all this time, sometimes it is easy to forget how young Damien truly is. With his youthful round face and big blue eyes, Damien could fit in with your average middle schooler.... if you ignore the murder in his eyes.
"My Father used to say that-"
BANG!
The Joker crumbles to the ground surprising every member of the Wayne family. A small trembling figure is revealed slowly stepping out from behind the clown. Scanning the room for any other potential danger, Y/N reluctantly puts the safety back on.
"Are you guys okay?' Y/N's voice trembles before dutifully untying Bruce.
Five pairs of eyes stare at her in painful silence.
"Where did you get that?" Damien questions breaking the silence.
Making her way down the line, Y/N starts working on Tim's restraints next.
"Alfred stashed a few in case something like this happened. I never thought I would ever need it... Until a van full of clowns passed me on the highway this morning."
An unexpected smile appears on Damien's face. Jason and Dick share a long look. Jason shrugs. Bruce's unreadable gaze suddenly makes her defensive. Before untying Jason, Y/N kicks the Joker. A wheezy laugh echoes across the room. At the pure shock staring back at her, she defends "It's not like I killed him or anything. Have you guys never heard of stand-your-ground laws?"
Jason starts to chuckle to himself. Looking past the horrified reactions of his family to his unlikely savior, he flashes her a grateful smile. Patting her on the back, he says
"Well' I don't know about the rest of them, but I'm sure glad you were here. That was badass."
Sharing an unreadable look with Dick, it doesn't take very long for the rest of the family to snap out of their stupor. Tim and Damien team up to tie up the clown prince of crime while Dick gags him. Once the team realizes it wasn't a lethal shot, jokes run wild.
"Listen, I'm just saying you'll never see Y/N and Deadshot in the same room..." Dick jokes playfully shoving the girl.
"Please if Y/N's skill set resembled any vigilante, it would be Nightwing." Tim continues with a wink.
"Y/N would be great at bow staff, but I sincerally doubt that Nightwing could do colorguard." Jason jokes.
"Ladies. Ladies. You may be right, but my ass would not look as good in the uniform." She interjects, "Man's definitely got me beat there.
"Debatable," Jason comments under his breath.
Dick smacks him lightly on the arm.
Bruce offers the young girl a cold glass of water while steering her away from all the chatter. Y/n gratefully takes it.
"Are you alright?"
Y/n nods slowly.
Bruce's gaze meets hers. It's easy to see why people consider him a playboy. His eyes have the ability to make you feel completely and utterly seen.
"Thank you for protecting my family."
Melting under his earnest gaze, Y/N glances toward the 3 boys dragging Jason away from the Joker. Past the Billionaire heartthrob lies a wearied Father in constant fear of losing his family... again.
"I'm sorry I know you don't like guns. I didn't like the way he was looking at Damien."
Bruce sighs putting a hand on her shoulder. The wrestling brothers draw our attention back to the front of the room.
"I had to do it for old times' sake. Come on!" Jason protests with a smug grin as Tim and Dick drag him away.
Winking at Y/N, Jason weakly waves as the boys leave the room.
A parade of red and blue flashing lights interrupts the show.
Alfred slips into the room wordlessly.
"Master Bruce, Detective Gordan would like a word."
Y/N gasps in surprise.
"Where have you been?"
Alfred stays silent for a moment.
"Who do you think dealt with his goons?"
Batman and Gordon:
In the corner of the room watching the group of young men teasing Y/N, Batman and Gordan exchange glances.
Gordon cracks a smile.
"Seems like a good kid." Gordan
Batman stays silent observing the interactions unfolding before them.
"She has impeccable marksmanship for someone who has never been trained." Batman comments.
Gordon raises an eyebrow. Taking a sip of his coffee, he pauses.
"Are you insinuating something?"
"...No. It's an observation."
Tag list: @jjsmeowthie
#batfamily x reader#gotham x reader#batman x reader#dick grayson x reader#nightwing x reader#jason todd x reader#red hood x reader#jason todd x you#red hood x you#joker x reader#bruce wayne x y/n#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne imagine#batman imagine#damien wayne x reader#red robin x reader#robin x reader#gotham rogues#dc imagine#dick grayson#red robin#robin#dc robin#damian wayne#batfamily
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Hawks Headcanons
A/N: I am currently obsessed with Hawks (if you couldn't tell) and writing for him is fun. I made these headcanons while procrastinating on my midterm paper a few days ago-
Warnings: Some NSFW content; MDNI. Some angst too
Starting things off with an angsty bang, Hawks has a bad habit of plucking his feathers when he is stressed out. Itâs never too often and itâs never to a critical extent, but it does occur. Birds often do this as a form of coping with negative feelings, so perhaps he does this after a brutal mission.Â
Like many other people, I firmly believe that Keigo has a thing for shiny or interesting looking objects. Again, itâs not to an obsessive extent, but he does have a good eye for pretty trinkets. Especially ones he thinks will look good on you.Â
I donât think Hawks is a good cook. There, I said it. This man barely has time for himself, do you really think he has time to devote to cooking? Do you really think that the Commission taught him to cook? Fuck no. He sticks to quick take out purely out of necessity.Â
They say that the quickest way to a manâs heart is through his stomach, and this is absolutely true with Keigo. He would love the little lunches and dinners you make for him while he is at work! He gobbles it up like a turkey. He swears that your food is the best thing he has ever had; he literally moans when the aroma hits his nostrils.Â
I forget which fic I read this from (I will link if I find it), but I adore the headcanon of Hawkâs taking rut suppressant pills. I just think it makes so much sense since it aligns with his work-centric life and his lack of a wife (we arenât talking about when you are married to him, obviously). They are probably similar to birth control pills where they stop the rut from happening 5% of the time.Â
Even without his rut happening, Keigo still has a huge breeding kink. Can you blame him though? He just thinks that you'll look gorgeous with his cum leaking out of your pretty pussy.Â
*whispers* he also has the equipment to match
He has definitely accidentally run into a window from imagining you with a cute lil baby bump.Â
He can get a little whiny and needy about wanting to devour your pussy. He will straight up beg you on his hands and knees. Please say yes to him.Â
The songs Angel with a Shotgun and Mr Blue Sky fit him so well. Fight me on this.Â
Also the song Hey Look Ma, I made it
I just imagine happy birb listening to Mr. Blue Sky after meeting you.
Intentional or not, his wings flap and rustle during sex.Â
On the topic of his wings, I donât think they are as sensitive as we all wish they were. Itâs not like heâs gonna start moaning and whimpering when random fans touch his wings (he canonical doesnât) HOWEVER, it does feel nice when you massage and gently comb your fingertips through them. Iâm thinking that itâs similar to hair?? Or maybe his wings are ticklish?? But only in the right context??Â
You are the only person he really trusts to take care of his wings
Keigo loves holding you in his arms and taking you on night flights. The stars always seem brighter when they are reflected in your eyes (at least, Keigo thinks soâŚ). You even have your own set of aviator goggles to wear during these dates.
One of his favorite things is when he DOESNâT have morning patrol and can snuggle you until at least 10 in the morning. Although it may be longer because his sleep debt is so huge. There is just something so satisfying and peaceful with having you close enough to hear your heartbeat.Â
His biggest dream is being able to have a family with you in a quaint little house. His life, your lifeâŚthey arenât constantly in danger and he can sleep in with you, make you breakfast (itâs only a little burnt), wrap his wings around you.Â
Keigo is extremely possessive of, not only you, but the life you created together. He is very sensitive towards things that threaten the small slice of normalcy he has, eliciting a sense of hypervigilance and territorialism.Â
His mental state isnât the best from the culmination of trauma he experiences, leading him to commit psychic cannibalism on himself. He represses all of these negative feelings in order to perform to the best of his ability and be the good lap dog for the Hero Commission.Â
Needs therapy.
Itâs established that he has some form of echolocation through his feathers. SoâŚhear me outâŚjust to make sure you are safe 24/7, Keigo gives you one of his smaller feathers. Iâm not going to rant because I might make this into a small oneshot/drabble later
#Keigo Takami#Keigo Takami x reader#Hawks#Hawks x reader#Hawk mha#bnha#reader insert#Hawks smut#Keigo Takami smut#Hawks x reader smut#my hero academia smut#mha smut#mha x reader#Hawks headcanons#Keigo headcanons#Keigo x reader#Hawks x you#Keigo Takami x you#fluff
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Cowboy hat rule (Tyler Owens, Twisters)
A/N: Take a guess, what movie do you think I watched recently? Iâll give you a hint, it wasnât Deadpool and Wolverine (I also watched that, but I preferred the man with the swirly winds).
Pairing: Tyler Owens x Fem!Reader.
Summary: In between butting heads with Javiâs team and running a successful YouTube channel based entirely around tornadoes, Tyler Owens is introduced to the most interesting woman heâs seen in a good while - and her sister.
Word Count: 521
Warnings: fluff, kind of suggestive (cowboy hat rule), drinking and minor worries of drink being spiked but it doesn't happen weâre all okay here, very limited knowledge of America (Iâm English).
Parts: Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
I have redone the form for the taglist now that Iâm apparently expanding from Criminal Minds
How she ended up drinking with them, she had no idea. But anything was better than dealing with her sister pretending not to make goo-goo eyes at Javi.
Now, sheâs up on the top of Tylerâs truck, drinking a shit beer with a peeling label and questioning whether or not these people would drug her.Â
The bloke with the camera seems alright, and the tornado wrangler was more focused on whatever heâs messing with than her.Â
One of the girls, Lily- maybe, tapped her legs, grinning up at her.Â
âSo~ which part of New York are you from?â
Maybe the beer is drugged, maybe itâs turning her senses to mush. Or maybe itâs been too long since she had piss-poor beer and decent company.
âAlpine.â
Lily - again, maybe - blinked up at her and then laughed, standing up on the side of the truck to smack the side of her thigh playfully.
Not only that, but Mr Tall, Plaid and Dangerous finally looked up.Â
âCome onâ even I know thatâs in Texas.â
âAnd thatâs where Iâm from, Alpine, Texas. I hide the twang, Iâve been too many guyâs fantasies in bars that itâs just easier.â
Giving a wink before swigging the last of her beer. Feeling a tap on her shoulder, she leant back on her forearms, making sure she didnât lie back on anything.Â
Tyler was grinning at her, that stupid grin that pairs a little too well with that cowboy hat for her fuzzy brain to think straight.Â
âNot a city girl?â
âUh huh, daddy ran a ranch, grew up schooling cowboys like you. Youâre no different.â
He seemed impressed by that; maybe not impressed. Just marginally more interested now he knows they arenât a pair of bored blonde women from the city come to chase the storms with the fancy company.Â
Nothing worse than someone who doesnât actually respect the weather theyâre chasing - thatâs how people die.Â
âMe? How am I no different then, Alpine?â
Humming, she passed him her empty bottle, which he took without questioning it. Eyes somehow glittering beneath the brim of that hat.Â
She needs that hat, before his eyes, his smile and his goddamn cologne do her in.
âYou steal something near and dear to them- make them pay real close attention to you.â
Managing to swipe the hat from his head and place it firmly on her own, fighting the smug grin on her face.Â
She knows that he knows that she knows exactly what that means.
Canât claim ignorance now, she made it loud and clear that this is not her first rodeo. He may wrangle tornadoes, but what the hell is he supposed to do when a gorgeous woman steals his hat and pushes away.Â
Getting Lily to help her down and then swinging an arm over her shoulders.Â
âLetâs go find more beers, Lils, I love your shirt by the way.â
Turning back around to grin at him as Lily starts talking. Flicking the brim of the cap up so that he could see the way her eyebrow raised in challenge.Â
Oh yeah, he definitely has a favourite sister now.
Want more?! Good!
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pierced. pt. 6 | spencer reid.
Spencer needed to stop getting in his own way of what he wanted.
you will find the other parts on my masterlist
cw: kissing, suggestive sentence in there somewhere, mentions of alcohol, angst if you squint, flufffff
a/n: aahhh!!!! (smut in the next part)
âShe looked like you.â
You stopped stroking your hand through Spencerâs hair at his confession. He had been sitting with you on your couch for almost an hour, his head lying comfortably on the couch cushions as he faced you. You glanced up at him, your brows knitted together.
âWho did?â you whispered gently, twirling a piece of his hair between your fingers.
âOne of the victims⌠in the case we worked,â he clarified, almost hesitating with his words like he was embarrassed to admit it.Â
You frowned, âdid it⌠frighten you?â
Spencer shrugged, âI think it made me realise how dangerous my life is. My job is my life and it made me think about all the things that have happened to me and my friends because of this job⌠Someone was killed in the apartment across from you, and Hotch lost his wife, Y/N. It just⌠freaks me out a bit.â
You listened to Spencer talk, running a hand through his hair as he admitted to the things that were bothering him. You understood why Spencer was worried, you would be too if you had a job like Spencerâs. He worked to find some of the most dangerous people in the world, you commended him for that.Â
You took in a breath, âI would be worried too, Spence. And it must bug you even more than you canât guarantee the safety of the people you love and care about.â
âIt does,â Spencer sighed, his hand reaching out to hold yours.
âAre you trying to tell me something, Spencer?â You asked softly, âyou donât want to see me again?-â
âWhat? No!â Spencer quickly said, standing up from the couch quickly. âI mean⌠No, I want to see you again. I want to hold your hand whenever I want and-and go on dates, itâs just-â Spencer let out a soft groan as he rubbed his hands down his face.
âYou want to keep me safe?â you asked, standing up to pull Spencerâs hands away from his face. Spencer looked at you, almost amazed at how you knew what he wanted to say.
âYeah,â he replied, holding your hands gently. âI just wish it was simple.â
You sighed, âI know,â you leaned in to wrap your arms around him in a tight hug, âme too.â
â...I can still see you though, right?â He muttered against your hair.
You chuckled softly, pulling away to cup his face, âof course you can, Spence⌠We can take things slow, keep everything private⌠I just want you to be happy.â
Spencer beamed at your answer, pressing a kiss to your forehead, âI want you to be happy too.â
Your palms were sweaty as you stood outside Rossiâs house clutching a bottle of wine in one hand while Spencer gently held your other hand. You donât know why you were nervous, youâd met everyone before. But to be fair, you were slightly tipsy the last time. You spent the afternoon getting ready, styling your hair and doing your makeup nice for the occasion. Spencer came over to pick you up and yes, you may have got distracted against the kitchen counter for a good 30 minutes, but you were finally here.
âShit, Iâm nervous,â you admitted.Â
âWhat? Why are you nervous?â Spencer asked, lifting his hand to knock at the door before stopping himself to look at you.
âI donât know! I was tipsy the last time I met everyone,â you whisper-shouted the last part, making Spencer chuckle softly.Â
âWell,â he stepped down off the top step, standing in front of you, âyou look really beautiful and you shouldnât feel nervous⌠Garcia has been very excited to hang out with you again and Rossi and Morgan have been bugging me about bringing you along to one of these for a while now.â
You smiled softly, âreally?â âOh yeah,â Spencer replied, âSo for the foreseeable future, youâre kind of obligated to come.â
âOh really?â You raised a brow. âYou plan on keeping me around for the foreseeable future?â you teased.
âI mean, I kind of like you,â he teased back, âand you have a nice rack-â
âSpencer!â you punched his shoulder as he giggled like a child. âSo vulgar.â
âYou like it,â Spencer grinned, putting a hand around your waist and leaning down to kiss you. You cupped his face gently, letting him pull your body tight against his.
âOi,â Rossi grumbled. You and Spencer shot away from each other. âNo kissing on my porch.â
âSorry, sir,â You squeaked out, quickly scurrying inside as Spencer followed you like a puppy.
You felt her hug before you saw her, Penelope throwing her arms around you in a tight hug. You chuckled and hugged her back, âI havenât seen you in forever! I keep telling Reid to bring you along to stuff but he always says youâre busy,â she frowned.
You knew half of that was true, your job was demanding and you had four huge projects you were working on and you were thinking about going back to school. The other half was that Spencer was nervous to over involve you in things, partly because he didnât want to scare you off and because he wanted to keep your dating life fairly private.Â
âYeah, I have been busy, Iâm sorry,â you winced.
âOh, donât be silly!â Penelope waved you off, âCome on, weâre sitting in here.â Penelope grabbed your hand and started dragging you to the kitchen. Spencer and Rossi followed behind you, Rossi berating Spencer for being late, which Spencer blamed on traffic (liar).
You were met with an outpouring of affectionate greetings as Penelope brought you into the kitchen, which smelled amazing. You placed the bottle of wine down on the counter which JJ and Emily immediately began inspecting.
âHi, everyone,â you greeted shyly, feeling Spencerâs arm wrap around your waist.
âHey, lovers,â Morgan grinned cheekily.Â
âOooh,â Rossi picked up the bottle of wine you bought, âgood taste in reds, I see.â
âI used to be a bartender. I couldnât afford to have bad recommendations,â you shrugged.
âMmm, I like you,â Rossiâs eyes narrowed as he pointed at you. You grinned up at Spencer, letting him plant a soft kiss on your temple.Â
Rossi continued to prepare dinner, blatantly refusing to let anyone help him even though he had about four things, all of which smelled amazing. You sat by Emily, JJ and Penelope, letting them ask you a myriad of questions about you and Spencer.
âHow long have you two been together now?â Emily asked, leaning her chin on her fist on the counter.
âUh, about two months,â you replied, thinking for a moment. âBut weâre not like, together-together. Just dating.â
â...He hasnât asked you to be his girlfriend?â JJ asked.
âNo, not yet. I think he wants to take things slow,â you said with a smile. Emily, JJ and Penelope shared a knowing look with each other. â...What?â
âNothing,â Emily shrugged.
âOh, come on, donât leave me hanging like that,â you pouted.
âHe just talks about you a lot, sweetie,â Penelope grinned, ââY/N told me that alreadyâ, âY/N makes my coffee betterâ, âNo, Iâm meeting with Y/N for lunchâ, âI have plans, Iâm hanging out with Y/Nâ, itâs all the time.â
âIâve never seen him so happy,â JJ smiled, staring at you sideways. You glanced over your shoulder at Spencer, who was already looking at you. He lifted his hand, waving at you from across the room where he stood with Morgan, Hotch and Hotchâs son Jack.
âHe makes me happy too,â you replied with a grin.
âAwww,â Penelope cooed, wrapping her arms around you, âtake care of our boy wonder.â
âDinner is ready,â Rossi sang. âAnd you are right, it smells divine.â
You sat next to Spencer at the dining table, feeling his warm hand rest on your knee under the table. You smiled to yourself, resting your hand over his. You enjoyed your meal with everyone, revelling in the compliments over your choice of wine. You watched as Jack showed Spencer his dinosaur figurines at the table, your heart fluttering at the sight of Spencer playing with Hotchâs son like he was a big kid himself.Â
Once everyone finished dinner, you helped Rossi clean up the table, even after he insisted you sit down and drink some more wine. You ignored his protests and helped him clean up and he made a comment along the lines of, âitâs like arguing with Spencer.â
Spencer ended up helping too, encouraging Rossi to let you and Spencer do the dishes since he cooked all afternoon. Rossi threw his hands up in defeat, sitting back down in his chair and topping off his glass of wine. The two of you stood began cleaning the kitchen and Spencer seemed fussy, like there was something on his mind.
âWhatâs on your mind?â You asked as you rinsed the clean dishes, soap suds clinging to your forearms. Spencer stopped drying one of the wine glasses, turning to give you his full attention.
âHow do you know Iâve got something on my mind?â He asked curiously.Â
âI feel like I can read you pretty well, Spence,â you retorted.
âYouâd be a good profiler,â Spencer said, bumping your shoulder.
âYeah, no thanks,â you chuckled, hanging him another dish to be dried.Â
A comfortable silence hung in the air before he spoke again, â...how would you feel if⌠If I asked you to be my girlfriend?â
You stopped what you were doing to look at him, â...You want me to be your girlfriend?â
â...Yeah, I do,â Spencer muttered softly, âonly if you want to be my girlfriend, of course,â he quickly said.
Your heart was in your throat, trying to suppress the smile that wanted to break out across your face. âYou mean that?â
âYeah⌠I really like you, Y/N. And I know we said we wanted to move slowly but itâs driving me crazy not being able to call you my girlfriend, you know?â He admitted, putting the rag on the counter to grab your hands.
âI really like you too, Spencer.â
âSo⌠will you be my girlfriend?â He asked, eyes narrowing with nervousness.
âIâd love to be your girlfriend, Spencer Reid,â you grinned. Spencer let out a breath of relief, unsure of where to put all the excitement building up in his chest. He had no idea how he landed someone like you. He suddenly planted a kiss on your lips, cupping your face in his warm hands.
âThank you,â he whispered against your lips.
âWhy are you thanking me?â you chuckled.
âFor giving me your number,â he admitted, âI would have been too nervous to ask for it myself.â
âWhat can I say,â you shrugged, âyou were just too cute to let go.â
Spencer smiled and planted another kiss to your lips, a deeper kiss that made your heart flutter and your toes curl. Your fists held his shirt, pulling him closer. He pushed you against the counter gently, his hand gripping the side of your neck to tilt your head back, deepening the kiss.
âOi,â Rossi grumbled, louder than the first time he caught you two, âno kissing in my kitchen.â
a/n: Rossi is me
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Practice On Me â Part Thirteen â Azriel x Reader
Summary: Backstreetâs back, ALRIGHT! Or rather, the Bat Boysâ˘ď¸ sort their issues out. Tathalnâs ball is officially announced. Azriel gives Kaeda a piece of his mind. Fin has no business being the sexy dad he is. Rozaâs worried about reader.
Word count: 6.3k.
Warnings: None for this part.
All is silent, save for the rhythmic tick-tick-ticking of the clock. Cassian has always hated that clock. Finds it fucking annoying.
But it fills the vacant hole that exists in the absence of conversation. That hole is open and gaping between Cassian and Azriel. Itâs not a table that sits between them â itâs a dangerous, yawning chasm.
Az stares at Cass, and Cass feels uncomfortable. Heâs seen that cold gaze be levelled on people hundreds of times, thousands. To be on the receiving end feels a little like staring death in the face. He actually kind of wishes that Kaeda hadnât been sent off to the dorms to sleep off her drunken state, because at least then he wouldnât be the only one here, being subjected toâŚthis.
So, he stands up, so abruptly that his chair almost topples over, and asks, âWant me to make you some tea?â The question feels stupid the second it leaves his lips.
Azrielâs eyes track him, drink in every uneasy shift and twitch. Itâs not that Cass is afraid of Az â though anybody with half a brain cell would be â just that heâs not good in these situations. Situations where he has to be serious andâŚand listen.
âCassian.â The shadowsingerâs cold voice stops him before he can move. âWhen, in our years of friendship, have you ever once made me tea?â
Cass peers over a broad shoulder and shrugs half-heartedly. âFirst time for everythingâŚâ
âSit.â
The word brooks no room for argument. Cassian does, indeed, sit.
Itâs then that Azriel heaves a deep sigh, his entire body taut as a bowstring, and says, âIâm sorry.â
Cass blinks. âWhat?â
âIâm sorryâfor what I did in the mead hall. IâŚhad no right.â
ââŚBut Y/N and IâŚâ
âItâs not for me to dictate whether the two of you should or shouldnât lie together. MyâŚjealousyâŚis my problem, and mine alone.â
This is hard, Cassian realises â for Az to say this. For him to face it. And Cass can relate to that. Not everyone can be as silver-tongued as Rhysand. The Mother knows, Cass himself isnât.
But he also isnât an idiot. Some people may believe him to be, and thatâs their mistake, because being proved wrong is usually the last thing they remember before waking up to a healer standing over them. Heâs aware enough of his surroundings to know that something was brewing between Azriel and Y/N for years before Cass took her to bedâŚor kitchen counter, orâŚwhatever.
âI need to be better,â Cassian offers, âat thinking before I act. Thinking about who I might hurt with my decisions. Iâm working on it.â
Az studies his friend, and he feels no anger. If anything, itâs guilt that claws at the shadowsinger. He gave poor Cass a pretty good hiding over something that was, essentially, none of his business. And it could have all been different if Az simply wasnât a coward, afraid of his feelings.
Something he needs to work on.
And perhaps heâs doing that as, rather than burying the topic, he asks, âWhatâŚwhat actually happened? How did you end up sleeping together? I meanâŚdo you have feelingsââ
âNo.â Cassian cuts him off, blinking. âGods, no. I love Y/N, you know that. But not romantically. I justâŚI felt so damn useless that night, Az. If youâd seen the way Y/N wasâŚthe self-loathing. I didnât know how to help.â
Immediately, Azrielâs brow pinches. âSelf-loathing?â
âBecause of what her father did to her. When we were flying to Fenlaros, and she was the only one being carried inâŚâ
Azriel slumps back in his chair, feeling like a godsdamned idiot.
He blinks forward and wonders what the fuck the point is in being born a shadowsinger when he obviously canât read situations very well. Within seconds, itâs clicking into place.
âAnd then you started that fight with that Fenlarion male,â Cass continued. âand Kaeda just declared that it was her you were fighting overâŚand everyone has a limit, you know? I think that night was just all too much for Y/N. And she was so upset, so downtroddenâŚtalking about how she hated herself. And Iâm not good with words like Rhys is, and Iâm not as observant as you are, but I am good at physical touch. Physical comfort. And it seemed like the only thing I could offer in that moment to take that bleakness away from her. But I should have thought about how you would feelââ
âIâm glad you were there for her.â Azriel blurts, realising, with every word, how much he means them. âI wasnât. I failed her that night.â
âI really didnât know that the two of you had been exploring things. If I did, I wouldnât have done it. I meanâŚthat fight you started wasnât over Kaeda at all, was it?â
Azâs eyes shutter. And it goes against every natural instinct of his to strip himself bare and justâŚbe honest. Every steel wall heâs ever built up is screeching in its effort to stand strong and not be caved in. And those walls were necessary in a life of darkness and hateâŚbut that life is long gone.
What good do those walls do him in an environment where he has love, has people who genuinely care for him? As much as he wants to run and hide from his feelings as he always hasâŚhe thinks that the key to happiness may be on the other side of those walls. That a new bravery lays in letting some light filter through the cracks and warm a guarded heart.
His voice is quiet, laced with a self-preserving fear, as he admits, âNo. It was not.â
Before Cassian can offer an encouraging response, the front door is swinging open, and Rhysand is kicking snow from his boots and trudging in. Azriel tenses like a threatened animal â but there is no threat here. Only safety, only love. He forces his shoulders to relax.
The violet-eyed male takes in the sight before him. Goes still as he looks between his two friends. âPlease tell me this is a positive conversation.â
Cassian inclines his head. âWork in progress. Why donât you make some tea?â
âFuck you, make your own teaââ
âMake me some teaââ
âKiss my ass, dickholeââ
âIâm in love with Y/N.â Azriel blurts.
It promptly shuts the other two males up.
They turn away from their bickering to look at the shadowsinger. He looksâŚshocked, by his own confession.
âIâm in love with her,â he breathes.
Cass and Rhys share a glance, and then Rhys is slowly approaching the table, carefully taking a seat like he doesnât want to startle Azriel out of the moment.
âWe know, Az.â Rhys tells him gently. âI meanâŚI think we always suspectedâŚâ
âI started that fight in Fenlaros because I was jealous of that damn male having his hands all over her. Saying the things he was saying. It was nothing to do with Kaeda.â
âYou should really tell her â Y/N, I mean. Tell her how you feel.â
Azrielâs eyes trace a mark in the table as he admits, âKind of already have. When she came to speak to me earlier today.â
Another glance is shared between Cassian and Rhys. And both are equally surprised â figure they would have heard something about it. UnlessâŚunless it hadnât gone down well.
And now that Rhys thinks about it, Y/N had been tense whilst heâd flown her back to Velaris. Taut in his arms and barely uttering a few words. Perhaps this was why.
âDid sheâŚnot take it well?â Rhys hedges. He wants to be delicate, not go blasting in at full-force. So rarely do they get to see such a vulnerable side to Az.
Azriel shakes his head once. âItâs not that, itâsâŚâ He clears his throat. âItâs more complicated than that.â
âHow?â Cass pushes, and Rhys shoots him a warning glance.
But Azriel doesnât balk from it, doesnât slink back in his seat. Instead, he lifts his head, and he levels his friends with a desperate look.
âThereâs more that I havenât told you.â He says.
â§: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďž
A short while later, Az thinks that maybe talking through his feelings is a good thing. Just saying the words has a little bit of weight easing from his chest, his shoulders.
But Cass and Rhys arenât saying anything at all. Cass and Rhys are staring at him like he has two damn heads.
And then Cassian sits up, barking, âTathaln Baralas wants what?â
âExactly what I told you.â Azriel shakes his head. âHe wants me to move to Fenlaros and work alongside him. Has some sort of backing from the High Lord, though Iâm not sure how much. In a nutshell, Kaedaâs interest in me has always been driven by her father.â
âI knew that little wasp was up to something. You know she tried to kiss me tonight?â
Az shrugs. Really could not give a fuck. âI figured something had happened from the look on your face.â
âI never liked her. Nor her fatherââ
âHer father,â Rhys cuts in, âwalks a very fine line in presuming to exceed in his role as a Camp Lord. His ego and title are going to his head a little, it would seem, if he believes he has the authority to scheme such ideas.â
âItâs a terrible idea.â Cass says. Neither of the other two noticed him get up, but heâs returning to his seat, speaking around a mouthful of food. âAll Illyrians in one big camp? Theyâll kill each other.â
Rhys is inclined to agree. But he turns a neutral â maybe gentle â expression on Az and asks him, âDo you want to go to Fenlaros?â
It would kill him if Az said yes. Would kill Cass, too. These recent days of being torn apart by tension has been bad enough. Being in different camps and not seeing each other is an almost unbearable thought.
But they would find a way to live with it, if Az decided he wanted to go. Theyâd find a way to be okay with it.
Such thick silence fills the room that the thudding of all three of their hearts is audible.
But then Azriel replies quietly, âNo.â
Neither Rhys nor Cassian bother to hide their relief.
âI told Kaeda I would think about it.â Azriel goes on. âAnd I told Y/N that Iâd promised Kaeda that. But I donât think Iâve ever really intended to think about it â or needed to. I thinkâŚI think I was just using it to bide my time. To create space for myself andâŚavoid everything else.â
âBy everything else,â Cassian chomps into a loaf of bread, âdo you mean facing your feelings for Y/N?â
Azriel canât deny it. He nods. âItâs not an easy thing to faceâŚto be vulnerable. Hiding behind this Fenlaros situation has just been easier. Cowardly, yes, butâŚeasier.â
âYou canât keep pushing her away, though, Az.â Rhys says. âYou canât let her think that you might be leaving if you have no intention of doing so.â
The shadowsingerâs eyes flutter shut, thick, dark lashes grazing his cheekbones. âDo you think Iâve fucked it beyond repair?â
âNo.â Cassian offers. âBut you will, if you donât start handling this the right way. Tell Kaeda and Tathaln to fuck off. Tell Y/N youâre in love with her and want to see her nakedââ
âWatch it.â Azriel warns quietly, but Cass continues, unperturbed.
âJust start letting more people in. And Iâll stop letting so many people in, because it gets me into trouble. I thinkâŚI think we all need to grow up a little. Do better.â
Rhysandâs brow pinches. âWhat do you mean, we all do? Iâve done nothing other than put my own pleasure aside to advise you idiots. What could I possibly need to do better?â
Cassian shrugs. âThat haircut, for one. Itâs annoying.â
âAnd when was the last time your hair saw a comb, Cassian?â
âWhen was the last time you were generous and made tea for your good, long-suffering friend?â
âSo this is about the tea.â
âOf course itâs about the tea, jackass. Zakai clearly isnât with you for your observational skillsâŚâ
Azriel sits back, allowing their bickering to become background noise. Thereâs a warmth to the sight, the sound, that makes him realise he never again wants a repeat of this situation â of being apart from his friends for days, tension thick between them.
He loves Rhys and Cassian. Loves them dearly.
Another reason why he could never, ever turn his back on this place.
And he finds himself actually beingâŚgratefulâŚthat Cass was there for Y/N that night. That she didnât have to suffer her self-loathing alone.
Thereâs still a lot to get through, of course. Daunting emotions and truths to face head-on. But as he watches the two loveable idiots in front of him take verbal swipes at each other, itâs the first time in a while that he wonders if things might actually be okay.
â§: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďžâ§ď˝Ľďž: *â§ď˝Ľďž
The news is announced the next day, when Lord Devlon gathers a rather colourful bunch of his soldiers in the mead hall and stands at the front, silencing them all with a single shout. Rhys, Cassian and Azriel stand against the far back wall, their arms folded over their chests.
Gods, they hope itâs not another training exercise. Not so soon. Az has things he wants to resolve before he saunters off and possibly gets himself killed.
But Devlon reads the roll of parchment in his hands, a frown contorting his features. He looks up, his eyes very deliberately finding Rhysand as he announces to the room, âA message from the High Lord.â
And every other gaze is then swivelling to turn on Rhys, too. Thereâs something accusatory about it, like theyâre assuming heâs privy to whatever it is their asses have been dragged out of bed to hear.
He isnât. He wants to be in bed, too.
âLooks like you pricks better get your dancing shoes ready.â Devlon raises his eyebrows. âThe High Lord is calling for a ball. Legions from all camps invited.â
This â this is exciting news for the brutish males who could fill the mead hall with their egos alone. Not because they have a particular affinity for dancing, but because amongst themselves, theyâre already murmuring about which particular camps they dislike for some reason or other, and what they plan to do about it. So many bloodthirsty streaks are painted in those malesâ eyes, stamping out the tiredness that lay there only moments before.
Nothing pricks an Illyrian maleâs ears up quite like the prospect of a fight.
âThe legions from each camp have been carefully selected, and you lucky fuckers will be representing Windhaven.â The Camp Lord continues, disdain dripping from his voice. He wants his men out there training in the cold, not prancing around a dance floor. âPlus-ones are allowed, also, so it might be time to splash out on a pretty gown for whoever is warming your bed these days. The ball is to be held on Starfall, at a neutral venue of the High Lordâs choosing, and I expect you all to make Windhaven â and me â look good. Any questions?â
âDo we actually have to dance?â One male asks, while another one pipes up with, âWill those pricks from Camp Steelshore be there?â
Rhys shuts out the litany of battling voices as he turns a concerned look on Az and Cass. Their expressions mirror his own. Something about this feelsâŚoff.
So while he looks like heâs merely lounging against the wall, hands in his pockets, he sends his inner claws spearing straight for Devlonâs mind. He doesnât give away what heâs doing, not even slightly, as he roots around in the Camp Lordâs thoughts and grabs for his glimpse of the letter. Rhys scans it, drops the thought, and heâs out of Devlonâs mind and straightening himself up before the male can so much as flinch.
âLetâs go.â He tells his friends, and not Devlon nor the males around them seem to care as Azriel and Cassian follow him, the formidable trio traipsing out into the thawing snow, regardless of whether the meeting is over or not.
Theyâre halfway back to the house, safely out of earshot, when Cassian finally barks, âA ball? What the fuck?â
âAt the request of Tathaln Baralas.â Rhys reveals. âThatâs what the letter said. He took the idea to my father, and the asshole is humouring him. This has all got to be part of Tathalnâs plan.â
Cassian scowls and spits his disdain at the ground. âSomeone needs to drive a poison arrow through that prickâs heart already. I donât like this one bit.â
âItâs my fatherâs intentions Iâm worried about.â Rhys shakes his head. âTathaln only has the power that my father gives him. One word from him and this idea could be snuffed out and never mentioned again. And I expected that to be the case. Arrogant as fuck he may be, but my father isnât stupid. Heâll know what a terrible idea this is, and I would have predicted that heâd laugh in Tathalnâs face for mentioning it. I didnât think heâd actually entertain itâŚwhich meansââ
âThereâs something in it for him.â Azriel finishes.
Rhysand nods. âEvery single move and choice my father makes is, ultimately, for his own gain. He would never agree to anything if he werenât getting something out of it himself. Whatever Tathaln has proposed to himâŚmy father will be using it for his own gain.â
Cassian opens the door to the cottage and strides in, forgetting â as always â to kick the snow from his boots. âWhat, though?â He asks. âWhat could Tathaln have that your father could want?â
Rhys shrugs and waves a hand, magic promptly mopping up the wet, melting trail left in Cassianâs wake. âThat, I donât know.â
âSo what do we do?â Az watches him closely, trying to read the thoughts on the maleâs face. His shadows reach out to him, too. âAre you going to talk to your father? Make him see how ridiculous this idea is?â
âNo,â Rhys shakes his head. âThere would be no point. I could lay a whole host of truths out to my father, and heâd go against them on ego alone. He must want something badly enough for him to be throwing money into it. This ball wonât be cheap.â
âAnd it wonât be a ball, either.â Cassian cocks an eyebrow. Roots through the kitchen cupboards for food. âBlood will be spilled. And you canât dance on blood. Iâve tried. Too slippy.â
Rhys chooses to ignore that little scrap of information. Mostly because he doesnât doubt it for a second. âI donât want us to pre-empt anything.â He says. âIf I go straight to my father with concerns about any of this, it could blow up in our faces, instead. For the time being, I think we should justâŚgo along with it. Watch it play out, and see what happens. My father is unpredictable. Even I canât tell you what goes on in his head.â
âI can speak with Kaeda.â Az clears his throat. âSee if sheâll tell me anything.â
âYou have fun with that.â Cassian mumbles, biting into something. âIâd sooner chop my balls off and nail them to the front door.â
âSuch a way with words. Itâs no wonder, really, that females fall at your feet.â
Cass shoots him a wicked grin. And thisâŚthis is nice. What theyâve both missed. This is normal.
âIâll keep an eye and ear out for anything.â Rhys drags them back to the subject at hand. âBut my fatherâs good at not letting anyone know things until he wants them to know them. And heâs clearly serious about this.â
Cassian swallows. Takes another bite. âAnd until then? Until we know what heâs even serious about?â
Violet eyes sparkle with mischief, and one side of Rhysandâs lips tips up. âUntil then, boys,â he says, âyouâd better practice your dancing.â
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Azriel really hopes sheâs not there, but sure enough, when he enters his room at the dorms, Kaeda is sitting up in his bed.
It gives him a little bit of satisfaction to see her lookâŚless than perfect, for once. Her hair is knotted, and even the vibrancy of the red shade seems a little dulled. Her skin is sallow, her eyes bleary. He wonders if sheâs as miserable as she currently looks.
She beholds him with a strangely coy look, like sheâs waiting for him to rip into her. But if she really knew the shadowsinger, sheâd know that that is not his style. He does not shout. He rarely fights physically. His danger lies in his quiet voice and icy stare.
Kaedaâs tired eyes fall to the blanket pooled around her waist, and she murmurs, âYouâre angry with me.â Her throat bobs with a swallow. âI understand. But I appreciate you putting me to sleep in here when I was in a vulnerable state.â
âI would have done it for anyone.â Az presses his back against the wall, folding his arms. âDonât let it go to your head.â
The female merely bows her head. Doesnât bother to argue.
âI have a question.â Azriel then says. âIâd like an answer.â
âI know that Cassian has probably told you about last night, and all I can say is Iâm sorry. I shouldnât have kissed him. I was drunk and upset and Iââ
âI donât care about that.â He really doesnât, and it shows on his face. âI want to know what your father is playing at by organising an Illyrian ball. I donât believe for a second that the gesture is an innocent one.â
She glances down again, but Azriel doesnât buy the coy act for one moment.
âKaeda.â His voice is laced with warning. âTell me.â
âItâs justâŚa ball. A ball to have all camps in one place, so he can get a good look at what each one has to offer. Itâs nothing sinister.â
âSo, a chance for him to scout more supporters for his cause.â
âHeâs trying to make a change, Azriel. A good oneââ
âHeâs interfering with lives. Tearing families apart.â
âGood results require difficult choices.â Her voice hardens.
The shadowsinger bites out a cold, brusque laugh, turning away from her. âMother above, he has you trained well.â
Thereâs movement behind him. Kaeda is kicking the sheets away and pushing to her feet. And sheâsâŚseething.
âYou would laugh in the face of somebody trying to make a positive change?â She snaps. âWhat reason have you to be so arrogant? At least my father is trying to make a difference. All youâre doing is clinging to a miserable life in a miserable place where you donât even have a family or home of your ownââ
âExcept that I do.â Azriel rounds on her so quickly that his wing knocks a fragrance bottle off a shelf. âI may not have your riches, and thatâs fine, because I have a group of people â a family I made â who love me enough to care whether or not I come home at night. Who want nothing less for me than happiness and contentedness, and not just to use me as a pawn in some convoluted plan that will do more harm than good. I have reason to be in Windhaven, whether itâs miserable or not. I have love here. So much of it. And thereâs nothing â not a damn thing â that would make me turn my back on it.â
Something in his impassioned speech clearly hits a nerve with Kaeda. She goes still.
And she looksâŚsmall, despite being fairly tall. She looksâŚinsignificant.
Her eyes fill with tears. One spills over and rolls down her cheek as she whispers, âPlease, Azriel.â
Azriel says nothing. Stares at her.
âPlease.â She takes a step closer. âIâm not above begging. IâŚâ Her voice cracks. âI need this. I need you to say yesââ
âYour father,â he interrupts quietly, âis playing a very dangerous game. And heâs using you to do it.â
âYou donât understand. IâŚif I canât give him what he wants, Iâm finished. Iâll have no home to go to, nobody on my side.â
âYou already have nobody on your side. Youâre his daughter and heâs dangling your livelihood over your head and ready to snatch it away if he doesnât get what he wants. Youâre already finished.â
âPlease.â She says again. Tears are streaming, now, and she tries fruitlessly to wipe them away. âPlease, justâŚif this is about Y/Nââ
âDo not,â he grits out, âbring her into this.â
âSheâs already in this. I know that you want her and not meâŚthat you always haveâŚand thatâs fine. Bring her to Fenlaros with you, if you must. Iâm sure my father could be persuaded on that. But justâŚpleaseââ
âYouâre not listening, Kaeda. This isnât just about my family. Itâs about all the other families that would be separated, ripped apart by your fatherâs scheming. Heâs power hungry. This is just the beginning of a whole host of self-serving plans that will bring him glory â do not doubt that for a second. People like him are never satisfied, and he needs to be stopped. Not encouraged.â
âYouâre wrong.â Her voice is so weak, Az isnât convinced she believes her own words. âHe just wants a better future for Illyriaââ
âNo.â Az levels her with a pointed look. âHe wants a better future for himself. I will not play a part in that, and neither will my loved ones.â
âAzriel, pleaseââ
âI will attend your fatherâs ball, just as Lord Devlon has ordered me to do.â He breezes to the door, not caring that this is his room heâs leaving her behind in. He stops, palm poised on the handle. âBut as for delivering a male straight into your fatherâs den? You better start trying that seduction on somebody else. Because there is nothing that would make me follow you into that camp.â
He leaves without a glance back. And while it sits uncomfortably inside him that he made a female cryâŚhe canât help feeling like heâs finally doing the right thing.
About time, too.
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This â this is the last thing you ever would have expected of coming to Velaris.
The tonic youâd needed was an extended amount of girl time with Roza. And yet here you areâŚin the High Lordâs arms.
âThis is useless.â You murmur, aware of every single place your body brushes against his. One of his hands is a firm weight on the small of your back, the other clasping yours. âIâm not a natural dancer. Fuck, Iâve never even been to a dance.â
Finâs mouth tips up at the corners. âThereâs that filthy mouth.â His hand lets go of yours, opting to move up to the cut of your jaw, where he allows his thumb to rest on your lower lip. âYou,â the pad of it swipes slowly over your mouth, âare going to be exquisite.â
You square your shoulders. Cock a challenging eyebrow. âIs that genuine encouragement, High Lord? Or an order?â
A deep chuckle. Slowly â reluctantly âhe lets his hand drop. âBoth.â
Flirting with him like this, playing the part of the High Lordâs pet, is a necessary evil. Youâre just so surprisingly good at it that you canât discern whether itâs an affront to him, or to Roza. Or both.
But you canât deny that youâve been flattered by his undivided attention this past week. And perhaps heâs been flattered by yours, too.
Mother bless Roza for her undying support. The best you can do for her, right now, is to keep her in the loop. She merely tells you to be careful.
But a week â a week of cosying up to Fin, of breaking through his exterior and appealing yourself to him. You humour him with these dance lessons, with the preposterously expensive shopping trips and dinners, the late night fireside conversations. Anything, everything, to get him to tell you what truth lies behind the excited glint in his eyes whenever he speaks of the ball. To tell you what it is heâs planning.
Perhaps youâre not appealing enough. You are no more aware than anyone else. And thatâs really fucking frustrating.
At least your hard work has kept you from thinking about Azriel every five minutes.
Your breath still heaving from your dance efforts, you make your way over to the table of refreshments by the huge, arcing windows that overlook the city. The High Lordâs palace, you have to admit, is a place you might miss once youâre back in Windhaven. Youâve never been one for luxury, never had more than a few things to your name â but the views are what makes you feel like the richest person in all of Prythian. These are not the cold, barren views of your camp, but a place of such vibrancy, it sometimes makes you want to cry. Itâs like the setting of a storybook, laid out right before you.
From behind, slow, graceful footsteps sweep across the wooden floor. Fin comes to a stop so closely behind you that his body heat encases you.
Fingertips make contact with your skin, the back of your neck. The sleeveless tunic you wore for your practice now feels like nothing more than a paper towel.
âYou have such beautiful skin.â Fin says roughly, and you tense. So far, this week, heâs kept a respectful distance away. Hasnât put you in any awkward positions.
You pivot under his touch, pressing your back up against the table enough that his hand drops. Itâs not entirely for show as you smile apologetically and tell him, âSorry â scars.â
Such genuine, slicing rage fills his face. The intensity of it almost knocks you breathless.
âI will kill him.â He says the words like a loverâs promise. âWith my bare hands, I will kill him for taking your wings.â
He had the power to stop the practice before you were even born. He is very old â over nine-hundred-years â and very powerful. What he says, goes.
And yetâŚhe means it. You can see it. And perhaps you have seen so much unkindness, such brutality, that little scraps of ferocity, of passion, in your defence, make you a blinded fool.
But a part of him â however small â actually cares about you. Enough to mark your abuser for death.
But your fatherâs blood will soak your hands, and yours only.
You smile up at him, wickedly, cunningly, prettily. âNo, you wonât.â You reply. âBecause I will do it first.â
And the fury in his stare simmers immediately to a different sort of heat. Your words are a flirtation to him â a cut of raw meat dangled above a hungry, waiting animal. They make him feel something.
âSuch a murderous little thing.â His soft laugh caresses your skin. He sounds pleased â impressed. âI like that. I like it a lot.â
âI would hope so. I am to be your special guest at the ball, after all.â A small voice in your head wants to coax him; tell me what youâre planning, tell me what to expect.
But, as always, he steers the conversation away, a vague, mysterious smile on his face. âDo you like it here in Velaris, my murderess?â
âI do, very much so.â
âI canât help pondering how much you would thrive here. You were made for so much more than Windhaven. Illyria, even.â
A soft, coy smile â one that comes from deep within that part of you that wants the praise, the compliments â that needs them. âMany would disagree with you.â
âShow them to me, and I will twist their minds until they see in you what I do.â
âAnd what is it you see in me?â A disingenuous little liar. A good actress. A traitor.
Fin leans down, and for one startling, heart-stopping, stomach-lurching moment, you think his mouth might meet yours.
But his lips brush over your cheek in a tender, barely-there caress. He presses a kiss to the skin before retracting. Straightening himself out. The way he slides his hands into his pockets with casual arrogance reminds you so much of Rhys that you miss your friend instantaneously.
âI see beauty that is unappreciated, and intelligence that is underestimated.â Fin says. âAnd I see a female that I wouldnât mind having at my side.â His eyes trace you from head to toe. âI wouldnât mind it at all.â
No response sits on your tongue. You think you might be too surprised by the genuine praise. The fact that the High Lord actually feels some level of affection towards you.
Maybe youâre not so bad at these games.
He turns without waiting for your response, and only when heâs at the door does he make eye contact with you over his shoulder.
âKeep practicing the dancing, my murderess.â He says. âWeâll make a fine pair at that ball.â
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If Roza werenât so worried, she might laugh at the three expressions of outrage that meet her when she strolls into the cottage.
Rhysand jumps up immediately and demands, âDid you fly here? Youâre supposed to be resting.â
Roza merely rolls her eyes and shuts the door behind her. âDonât get your undergarments in a bunch, Rhysand. Iâm pregnant â not on my death bed. The babe is fine.â
Her son does not look convinced. Neither do Azriel or Cassian. As if theyâre, like, experts on pregnancy, or something.
âWhat are you doing here, mother?â Rhys stalks straight to the fire and stokes it. Then straight over to the kitchen to make a hot drink. âIs everything alright?â
âYes. Mostly.â Roza pauses. âI hope.â
Azriel sits up at that. âIs Y/N alright?â
âSheâs fine.â If playing games with the High Lord of the Night Court can be considered fine. Roza eases herself into a seat, and Cassian is promptly propping cushions behind her back. âI want to talk to you about the ball.â
Cassâs lips turn up into a half-smile. âWeâll be on our best behaviour, Roz. Promise.â
âYouâd better be. Because I want all three of you looking out for Y/N at that ball, do you hear me?â
The command is a firm one, and yet the three males donât straighten up at her matriarchal tone like they usually do. Instead, they share a puzzled glance, frowns pinching their features.
âItâs a ball for Illyrian soldiers and their guests of choice.â Rhys explains, carrying a steaming mug over to her. âNone of us are bringing her along. Not to that.â
âYou may not be.â Roza slides a protective hand over her bump. âBut your father is.â
All three males go so preternaturally still, itâs almost frightening.
Rhys bites out, quietly, âWhat?â
âYour father is taking Y/N to the ball as his special guest. Heâs bought her a gown, taught her to dance â heâs serious about this.â
âHe canât.â The shadowsingerâs face is like rolling thunder. âHe cannot take her there. All those malesââ
âThatâs precisely why Iâm not attending. He needs someone in my place, and heâs taking Y/N.â
âHe can choose someone else.â Azrielâs clipped tone, his panic, is not at all personal to Roza. Usually, he would never speak to her in such a way, butâ
But this is Y/N theyâre talking about. Y/N in the High Lordâs hands, at a ball with so many Illyrian males, too many Illyrian males.
âWatch your tone, Azriel.â Rhys warns, but Roza is holding up a hand. Because she gets it â the panic.
âIâve tried telling him to take somebody, anybody, else.â She says. âHeâs insistent â absolutely adamant that he wants Y/N.â
âBut why?â Cassian frowns.
âI donât know. I donât know if his kindness to her is genuine or not.â She shakes her head, absentmindedly stroking her bump. âAll I know is that heâs taking Y/N to that ball, and Iâm not going to be there. You know, Rhysand, that there is no changing your fatherâs mind once itâs set. I need the three of you to look out for her.â
Because Y/N is just as much a daughter to Roza as the little girl growing in her belly. They know that.
Rhys inclines his head, reaching out to place a hand over Rozaâs. âWe will, mother.â He promises. âWhatever game heâs playingâŚweâll look after Y/N.â
Rozaâs eyes dart to Azriel, to Cassian. âDo you promise?â
âWe promise.â Cassian, unfazed as always, grins. âYou just focus on the little one, Roz.â
Azrielâs face is grave, but he nods once. âWe wonât let her out of our sight.â
Y/N is in good hands with them, Roza knows. She may even be in good hands with Fin, depending on what his true intentions are. Perhaps being at the High Lordâs side is the safest place she can be. Itâs an unknown.
But one thing Azriel does know, as he wishes and wishes for this damn ball to just be over already, is that heâs wracked with guilt.
He canât help feeling like itâs his fault â that his actions, his behaviour, chased Y/N right into a viperâs den.
That heâll stop at nothing to get her out of it.
pom tags: @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @sirenpearldust @queercodedcharacter @azriels-shadowsinger @ruler-of-hades @demi03 @magicaldragonlady @abrielletargaryen @ralsieq @v3lv3tf0x @achase2002 @feyretopia @hayrunnwr @donât-feed-the-hipsters @brekkershadowsinger @piceous21 @bloodicka @acourtofinkandpapyrus @riri-is-agirlie @siriusement @4valyries @socmono @azriels-mate123 @acourtofbatboydreams @katherinearcheron @nesemi @lupinswolfsbanes @dreaming-unafraid @dxnniiix @cyrygher @liddyr03 @lmllsl @nightless @teenageeggscissorslawyer @brighterthanlonelythoughts @blitz-fall @maybefoxysouls @mschanand1erbong @juiceboxreads @bangtanbecks @florencemtrash @hyemishii @obixix @thenovarose @meshellexplosionmurder @angzlxna @lissy31xoxo-blog @supernatural99 @positivewitch @art3-m1ss @milfhunter-pdx @bbuckysbeardd @coralseacourt @towhateverend87 @sspookz @bird-on-the-wire33 @morrie-rose @megwan @catscanteleport @sevikas-whore @thickthighs-sadeyes @hihelloitsbooktimeppl
#azriel#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x reader#shadowsinger#shadowsinger x reader#azriel acotar#azriel x you#azriel fic#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#acotar random#acotar x reader#acotar writing#acotar fanfic#acotar headcanon#acotar smut#acotar series#acotar fic#azriel fanfiction#azriel fanfic#reader insert#illyrians#rhysand#cassian#practice on me
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Lucifer Morningstar - Wrong impression.
Warning : none
Genre : fluff
Synopsis : âMay I request Hazbin Lucifer x Gojo! Gn reader? Strongest vs the strongest energyâ - anon
Reader : you / yours
A/N : probably didn't go the route you wanted⌠but I'm not that good with character!reader. Hope you still like it !
When meeting you, Lucifer was quite nervous. You were one of the strongest overlord of hell and had made your way up very quickly after your arrival down here. Upon shaking your hand, beads of sweat glided down his forehead.
What kind of business did you have with his daughter ? Why were you here ? He wondered, eyeing Charlie quickly.
His smile was a big toothy one but you could tell he wasn't very comfortable, he even wiped his hand on his coat after shaking yours. Subconsciously.
You weren't necessarily imposing or intimidating -though you were really good looking- so he had no reason to be nervous. You were even warm and welcoming toward him. And quite charming. Yet there was something else about you he couldn't put his finger on.
And you don't become an overlord by just being kind and goofy. You had to be powerful and dangerous. But who said you couldn't be all that ?
He expected it to be a ruse to manipulate his daughter and him. So with squinted eyes he watched your every move to find the moment you would drop the act.
But it never happened. Maybe it was because he had so much on his plate ? Trying to form a bond with his daughter, keeping an eye out for Alastor and another one for you.
But your warm smile seemed genuine and you never once put yourself between him and Charlie like Alastor had done, claiming she could almost call him âdadâ in their song.
You seemed to be close with Charlie's friends as well and they didn't seem to be worried about themselves with you being an overlord. You even seemed like a close friend of theirs. And the feeling was apparently reciprocated.
With a frown, Lucifer decided to give you a chance, waiting for you to slip up and show your true intentions, but it never happened. Until the fight against Adam with his exorcists.
Like him you had arrived late and like him again you had shown arrogance and confidence as you fought the angels. You killed them without mercy and easily and it even looked like you were finding it⌠boring ?
They were too weak for you and you knew it. It was easy to protect the cannibals and Charlie's friends.
You clearly wanted to have a go with Adam but let Lucifer handle it, you knew he could stand against him after all.
And he did.
Charlie had to stop him from landing the finishing blow and you wondered if you would have listened. If Lucifer had listened then maybe you would have too.
But Nifty didn't seem to have the same moral compass as you or Lucifer as she stabbed Adam to his death. Several times. While laughing.
The fight was over, very few exorcists remained and Lute flew away with them and Adam's halo. You helped rebuild the hotel with a nice song to motivate you and your friends and especially Charlie who felt down after all the bloodshed.
But before you could leave to go back to your quarters, Lucifer came to you, rather nervously. You turned to him, and stared.
âEr⌠You're not so bad, finally.â Lucifer said, fiddling with his bow-tie before extending his hand out.
âYou thought I was bad ?â You raise an eyebrow, amused and shake his hand. This time he doesn't wipe it on his coat.
âThe whole overlord title doesn't really go in favor of being⌠good.â
âNeither does the title of King of Hell. And yet, here you are !â You smiled, nudging him lightly with your elbow and he chuckled at your remark.
âYes. I guess so.â Lucifer smiled and looked up at you. âThank you for being here for my daughter. I mean it.â
You only grinned proudly, planting your hands in your pockets after patting his shoulder.
âOh well, she's worth it.â
Lucifer returned your smile, happy to see Charlie had a powerful friend like you beside her. Not like that radio demon who seemed more than sketchy. Maybe he could count on you to watch that demon and stop him from harming his precious daughter.
And maybe even he could see you as a friend.
#male reader#m!reader#lucifer morningstar x male reader#lucifer morningstar#lucifer morningstar x reader#hazbin hotel x male reader#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel imagine#lucifer morningstar imagine#hazbin hotel#gn!reader#gender neutral reader
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A Lion's Leap (under the dragon's eye)
- Summary: The king announces the betrothal of his youngest daughter, you, to Tyland Lannister. But even the Lannister Lord is taken off guard, as there has been some miscommunication regarding the proposal.
- Paring: targ!reader/Tyland Lannister
- Rating: Mature 16+
- Previous part: 1
- Next part: namesake
- Tag(s): @sachaa-ff @alyssa-dayne @oxymakestheworldgoround
Tyland Lannister paced back and forth in his chamber, wringing his hands and mentally preparing himself for what felt like the most dangerous conversation of his life. Not even the thought of facing down his brother Jason after their last argument felt as terrifying as what he was about to do: approach Rhaenyra Targaryen for advice. On how to woo her sister, no less.
The marriage was only a week away, and despite his best efforts to appear composed, Tyland was at a loss. You were kind, gentle, and far less fiery than your older sister, but in truth, he barely knew how to connect with you. He had decided to give you a small trinket, a gift to show his affections and intentions, but what sort of thing would you appreciate? Something personal, meaningfulâbut what? After hours of agonizing, he had concluded that only one person could help him, even if she would rather throw him into the Dragonpit than give him advice.
And that person was Rhaenyra.
Summoning every ounce of Lannister courage (and pride), Tyland found himself standing outside her chambers. He adjusted his tunic for the tenth time, tried not to wipe the sweat from his brow, and knocked, his knuckles sounding louder than intended. The door opened slowly, revealing the princess herself. Rhaenyra looked up at him, her expression immediately turning guarded, and Tyland could feel the temperature drop several degrees.
"Lord Tyland," she said, her tone cool, "to what do I owe the pleasure?"
Tyland swallowed, feeling as though he had just entered a dragonâs lair. Which, metaphorically speaking, was exactly what this felt like. "Princess Rhaenyra," he began, attempting a polite smile that probably looked more like a grimace, "I was hoping I could... seek your counsel on a matter of importance." He hesitated. "Regarding your sister."
Her brow lifted, and she crossed her arms, leaning against the doorframe. "Regarding Y/N?" she repeated slowly, clearly intrigued but not yet lowering her guard. "This should be interesting."
Tyland took a deep breath. "With the wedding approaching, I... I wish to make her feel more comfortable in our union. I intend to give her a small token of my affection, something meaningful, but I... confess, I do not know what she might appreciate most." He shifted awkwardly, waiting for the inevitable snide remark, but to his surprise, Rhaenyra simply studied him.
For a long moment, she said nothing. Tyland could practically hear the wheels turning in her head, as if she were deciding whether or not to indulge him in this request. Finally, she sighed and gestured for him to come inside.
"Very well," she said, her voice carrying that authoritative tone she so often used. "But let me make one thing clear, Lord Tyland." She glanced over her shoulder as he followed her into the room. "I still donât particularly like the idea of my sister marrying a Lannister. Any Lannister." The way she said it made his name sound like a bad taste in her mouth. "But..." She paused, turning to face him again. "Since this is happening, I suppose it would be in Y/Nâs best interest for you to at least try."
Tyland gave a nervous nod, feeling the weight of her words. "Thatâs all I wish to do, Princess."
Rhaenyra studied him for a long moment, her eyes narrowing slightly, as if trying to detect any insincerity. After what felt like an eternity, she finally relented, though her voice remained cautious. "Y/N doesnât care much for jewelry or gold," she said slowly, watching his reaction. "So if youâre thinking of presenting her with a necklace or some grand ring, you may as well throw it into the sea."
Tyland blinked. "No jewelry?" That had been his entire planâsome beautiful Lannister heirloom or a finely crafted trinket, something shiny and expensive. He immediately started panicking inside. What else was there? "Then... what would she appreciate?"
Rhaenyra exhaled, clearly not thrilled to be aiding him in this venture. "Y/N prefers simpler things," she continued, her tone begrudging, as if she couldnât believe she was having this conversation. "Sheâs thoughtful. She likes things that have meaning."
Tyland leaned forward slightly, his desperation growing. "Such as?"
Rhaenyra pursed her lips, as if holding back something. She glanced toward the window, clearly weighing her options before speaking. Then, in a voice so low that Tyland almost didnât catch it, she muttered, "Honeycakes."
Tyland blinked. "Iâm sorry, what?"
Rhaenyraâs eyes flicked back to him, and she scowled. "Honeycakes," she repeated, clearly annoyed that she had to say it again. "She has a soft spot for them. Thereâs a particular kind made with cinnamon and a bit of lemon zest. Sheâs liked them since we were children."
Tyland stood there, staring at her in disbelief. Honeycakes? Heâd been expecting some grand revelationâperhaps a cherished family heirloom or a rare flower from the gardens of Kingâs Landing. But no. Honeycakes. Cinnamon and lemon zest, to be precise.
Rhaenyra caught the look on his face and smirked, though there was a hint of reluctant amusement in her eyes. "What? Surprised she isnât pining for a crown of gold?" she asked with a tilt of her head. "My sisterâs tastes are simpler than you Lannisters might expect."
Tyland felt a strange mixture of relief and bemusement. "Honeycakes..." he repeated, half to himself.
Rhaenyra sighed, clearly done with the conversation. "If you want to win her favor, find those cakes. But donât make a spectacle of it." She fixed him with a look that told him exactly what she thought of grand, Lannister gestures. "Y/N values thoughtfulness, not showmanship. Keep that in mind, Lord Tyland."
He nodded earnestly. "Of course, Princess. I... I truly appreciate your help." He bowed, though he couldnât quite shake the strange image of presenting his bride-to-be with a basket of honeycakes before their wedding day.
Rhaenyra didnât bother to hide her smirk as he turned to leave. "Good luck, Lord Tyland. Youâll need it."
Tyland Lannister felt as though he was walking into battle. Not with a sword, mind youâheâd gladly take a sword over the delicate parcel he was carrying in his hands. The package was small, neatly wrapped, and smelled faintly of honey and cinnamon. He could only hope Rhaenyraâs advice was sound, though he still had lingering doubts that honeycakes were the key to winning over a Targaryen princess.
He had spent the entire morning overseeing the creation of these cakes, much to the confusion of the castleâs cooks. Tyland had never concerned himself with culinary matters before, but today, he hovered over the bakers like a general over his troops. The result? A batch of perfectly golden cakes, warm with the flavors of cinnamon, honey, and a hint of lemon zest. Now, with the prize in hand, Tyland approached the gardens where he knew you often spent time with your ladies-in-waiting.
As he entered the gardens, he spotted you sitting under a tree, a gentle breeze rustling the leaves around you. You were surrounded by a few ladies, all of whom were laughing softly at something one of them had said. The moment felt peaceful, idyllicâuntil Tyland realized he was about to intrude on it, honeycakes in hand. Here we go, he thought, straightening his shoulders and adopting what he hoped was a casual, confident stride. In reality, he probably looked like a man trying to act casual while delivering baked goods to royalty, which is to say, he looked incredibly awkward.
You noticed him approaching and smiled, though there was a hint of surprise in your expression. âLord Tyland,â you greeted softly, causing your ladies to quiet and glance between the two of you with interest. âWhat brings you to the gardens today?â
Tyland cleared his throat, suddenly very aware of how out of place he felt among the roses and lilacs. âPrincess,â he began, holding out the small package as if offering a peace treaty. âI... thought you might appreciate these.â He paused, then added awkwardly, âA gift.â
You tilted your head slightly, curiosity piqued. âA gift?â you repeated, your eyes drifting to the bundle. âWhat is it?â
âUh... honeycakes,â Tyland said, his voice cracking just slightly on the word. He felt like a fool standing there, a grown man delivering pastries like some kind of bumbling suitor, but it was too late to back out now. âWith cinnamon and lemon zest. I, uh... I heard theyâre a favorite of yours.â
Your eyes widened in surprise, and for a brief moment, Tyland worried he had completely misunderstood Rhaenyraâs advice. But then, to his relief, your face broke into a delighted smile, and you reached out to take the bundle from him. âHoneycakes?â you said, your voice filled with genuine happiness. âOh, I havenât had these in so long!â
Tyland blinked, startled by how quickly your expression had brightened. You unwrapped the parcel with eager hands, revealing the still-warm cakes inside. Without hesitation, you picked one up and took a bite, your eyes closing briefly as you savored the taste.
âTheyâre perfect!â you said, beaming at him. âThank you, Lord Tyland.â
Tyland felt a wave of relief wash over him, though he was still a bit taken aback by how easy it had been. You seemed so happy, genuinely pleased by something as simple as honeycakes. For the first time since this entire betrothal had been announced, Tyland felt a flicker of hope. Perhaps this wasnât going to be such a disaster after all.
The ladies-in-waiting exchanged glances, clearly entertained by the scene, but Tyland barely noticed. He was too focused on the way you smiled as you continued to eat the cake, your delight evident in every bite. He had never seen you so at ease before, and the sight made something warm stir in his chest.
Still, the moment wasnât without its awkwardness. Tyland stood there, unsure of what to do now that you had accepted the gift. Should he sit? Leave? Compliment the flowers? He cleared his throat, awkwardly shifting his weight from one foot to the other. âI, uh... Iâm glad you like them,â he said, feeling rather out of his element. âI thought... it might be something meaningful.â
You looked up at him, your expression softening. âIt is,â you said, your voice gentle. âItâs thoughtful. Thank you, Lord Tyland.â
He nodded, though he wasnât entirely sure what to say next. You continued to eat the cake with such genuine enjoyment that it almost made the awkwardness worth it. Almost.
After what felt like an eternity of standing there, Tyland finally found the courage to sit on the nearby bench, careful not to intrude too much on your space. The silence that followed wasnât entirely uncomfortable, but it was... well, a bit awkward. You looked at him with a kind smile, clearly sensing his discomfort but not pushing him to speak.
âI... wasnât sure what you liked,â Tyland admitted after a moment, his voice a little quieter now. âBut I wanted to try. To show you that... Iâm trying.â
You regarded him thoughtfully, finishing the last bite of your honeycake. âI can see that,â you said, your tone warm. âAnd I appreciate it, truly. It means a lot.â
Tyland felt a strange sense of accomplishmentâsomething he hadnât expected when he first started this endeavor. For the first time, he felt like he had made a connection, however small, with you. There was still an awkward distance between the two of you, but it wasnât as insurmountable as it had felt before.
As the two of you sat there, surrounded by the soft sounds of the garden and the distant chatter of the ladies, Tyland couldnât help but feel a bit more hopeful. This marriage, which had once seemed like an impossible task, might turn out to be something different. Something better.
Maybe, just maybe, it wouldnât be such a terrible mistake after all.
The great hall was alive with the sounds of celebrationâmusic, laughter, the clinking of gobletsâand Tyland Lannister found himself in the very center of it all, though it felt like a whirlwind he was somehow caught in. He glanced to his right, where you sat next to him, radiant in your wedding finery, your presence as serene and composed as ever. At least one of us looks like they belong here, Tyland thought with a nervous sip from his goblet.
King Viserys, sitting at the head of the table, looked positively jubilant, his rosy cheeks practically glowing from the wine and the joy of the occasion. Every now and then, he would raise his cup to no one in particular, chuckling at something that seemed to amuse only him. Tyland suspected it was the fact that everything had gone smoothly, despite the strange, tangled mess of the betrothal in the first place.
Rhaenyra, seated a little further down the table, was sending Tyland sharp looks. But, to his relief, they werenât the Iâm going to feed you to a dragon kind of looks she usually reserved for him. No, these were more the Iâm watching you kind, which, while still intimidating, felt significantly less lethal. Perhaps her sisterâs obvious happiness had softened her a littleâthough Tyland wasnât foolish enough to think she would ever fully approve of a Lannister as a brother-in-law.
Daemon, however, was another matter entirely. Leaning lazily in his chair with that unmistakable smirk plastered across his face, he hadnât said much during the feast, but his eyes had been on Tyland more than once. And every time their gazes met, Daemonâs smirk seemed to widen, as if he knew a secret that Tyland didnât. It was, frankly, unsettling.
Tyland shifted slightly in his seat, trying to ignore Daemonâs gaze, when the first of the lords began to approach the newlyweds.
Lyonel Strong, ever the statesman, stepped forward, his smile warm and genuine. âLord Tyland, Lady Y/N,â he said, bowing slightly. âCongratulations on your union. May it bring great strength to both your houses.â
âThank you, Lord Lyonel,â Tyland managed to say with a polite nod, grateful for the safe, neutral tone of the congratulations. Lyonel Strong wasnât one for scheming or underhanded dealingsâjust the sort of man Tyland preferred in moments like this.
But Lyonel wasnât the only one approaching. The next figure who came into view made Tylandâs stomach flip just a little: Otto Hightower, Hand of the King and, perhaps more importantly, the very man responsible for mixing up the marriage proposals in the first place.
âLord Tyland,â Otto said, his voice smooth as silk, his smile conspiratorial as he leaned in just a touch too close. âCongratulations on this most fortuitous match. It seems my... suggestion has borne fruit, wouldn't you say?â
Tyland stiffened slightly, managing a tight smile. âIndeed, Lord Otto. Your... foresight was certainly... unexpected.â
Otto chuckled, a sound that made Tyland want to check his coin purse, just in case. âAh, unexpected, yes, but beneficial, wouldnât you agree?â He straightened up, giving a small nod in your direction. âThe realm is stronger for it, and I daresay House Lannister has found itself in a most advantageous position.â
Tyland could feel the weight of the unspoken words hanging in the air. Advantageous position. Yes, Otto expected gratitude. And not just the kind exchanged over pleasantries at a feast.
âAs we move forward,â Otto continued, his voice lowering slightly, âI trust youâll remember those whoâve helped place you where you are, Lord Tyland.â
Tylandâs smile faltered slightly as he nodded, already feeling the strings that Otto was undoubtedly weaving around him. âOf course, Lord Otto,â he replied, his voice carefully measured. âYour assistance has not gone unnoticed.â
âGood,â Otto said, his smile never faltering, though it held the slightest edge of expectation. âVery good.â
And just like that, Otto moved on, leaving Tyland to reflect on the many ways that conversation could come back to haunt him in the future. But before he could dwell too long on it, another voice interrupted his thoughts, and this one he knew all too well.
âWell, well, well, look at you!â Jason Lannister strode forward, his usual swagger on full display, followed by several other members of their family, who were all beaming as if this were a victory for House Lannister rather than a wedding. Jasonâs grin was wide, bordering on smug, and Tyland braced himself for the inevitable teasing. âYouâve managed it, little brother! A princess! Youâve done the family proud.â
Tyland fought the urge to roll his eyes. âJason,â he greeted, trying to keep his tone civil. âI appreciate the sentiment.â
Jason clapped a hand on his shoulder, far too pleased with himself. âOh, donât be modest! A Targaryen bride! I didnât think you had it in you, truly.â
From the corner of his eye, Tyland saw you hide a smile behind your goblet, clearly amused by the exchange, and something about that small gesture made him feel just a bit lighter. At least someone found Jasonâs antics amusing.
âAnd what a bride youâve got,â Jason continued, his grin never faltering. âLady Y/N, youâre far too good for my brother, but I suppose heâs luckier than he deserves.â
You blushed slightly, though you managed to smile at Jason. âThank you, Lord Jason,â you said politely, clearly trying not to laugh at his exaggerated praise.
Tyland groaned inwardly, already anticipating the endless teasing that would follow in the weeks to come. But despite Jasonâs smugness, there was a genuine warmth to his congratulations. Tyland couldnât help but feel that, in his own ridiculous way, Jason was proud of him.
The rest of the Lannisters offered their congratulations, each one with varying degrees of sincerity, but Tyland couldnât help but feel more hopeful as the night wore on. There was something comforting about being surrounded by his family, as chaotic as they were, and sharing this moment with you by his side.
As the music swelled and the feast continued, Tyland glanced over at you once more. You were laughing softly at something one of your ladies had said, your face lit up by the glow of the nearby candles. For the first time, he realized just how lucky he truly was. What had started as a mix-up, a political maneuver he had been dragged into, was starting to feel like something much more.
Maybe, just maybe, this marriage would be more than a strategic alliance. Maybe it would turn into something he hadnât dared hope forâsomething real.
As the feast began to wind down, Tyland Lannister found himself seated with a goblet of wine in hand, but not really tasting it. His mind was spinning, already working out how he might navigate the dreaded bedding ceremony. Maybe he could politely refuseâafter all, he was a Lannister, and surely that carried some weight. Or perhaps he could find a way to subtly remove himself from the hall before anyone had the chance to call for the old, humiliating tradition. Yes, he couldâ
But before Tyland could formulate an escape plan, he noticed Daemon rise from his seat, a mischievous glint in his eyes. A sense of impending doom washed over Tyland, and he immediately stiffened. Nothing good ever followed that look in Daemonâs eyes.
Daemon raised his goblet, drawing the attention of the entire hall. âMy lords, my ladies,â he called out, his voice carrying effortlessly over the murmurs of the crowd. âNow, as is tradition, we celebrate the union of my dear niece and her new husband.â His grin widened, and Tylandâs heart sank. Here it comes, he thought, mentally preparing for the worst.
âBut,â Daemon continued, his voice dripping with mock solemnity, âwe are a house of dragons, not sheep. So, I say we leave behind the old customs of the bedding ceremony, and insteadâŚâ He paused, clearly relishing the moment as all eyes turned to him. âInstead, itâs time for the bride to saddle her husband upon the back of her dragon.â
Tylandâs goblet slipped from his hand, clattering onto the table. He was too stunned to speak, his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. Saddle? Her husband? On a dragon? His mind struggled to process the words, but Daemonâs smirk left no doubtâthis was very much real.
Around the hall, murmurs of confusion and amusement rippled through the guests. Tylandâs gaze shot to you, but before he could say anything, his worst fear was confirmed when King Viserysâhis father-in-lawâjoined in, clapping his hands together and laughing heartily.
âNow, that is a fine tradition!â Viserys exclaimed, clearly pleased. âNo need for the old ways, not with dragons in the family!â He looked positively delighted with the idea. âI agree with my brother. Let my daughterâs husband show his bravery by riding Silverwing!â
Tyland felt the blood drain from his face. He had never felt further from his Lannister pride than in that moment. This had to be some cruel jest, a nightmare, perhaps. But no, it was all too real. He glanced at Daemon again, who was leaning casually on the table, watching Tylandâs horror unfold with gleeful satisfaction.
Across from him, Rhaenyra looked positively delighted, her lips curling into a smirk as she exchanged a glance with you. Tyland had no doubt she was enjoying this far too much. Her amusement was only compounded by Daemonâs outlandish proposal, which had, of course, been accepted by none other than the king himself.
Tylandâs mind raced. Saddle her husband? On a dragon? He wasnât sure whether to faint or flee. He wasnât even sure which option was worseâpublic humiliation in a bedding ceremony or being strapped to the back of Silverwing like a sack of potatoes.
You, seated beside him, must have sensed his panic, for you reached out and gently touched his arm. âTyland,â you said softly, your voice calm despite the absurdity unfolding around you. âItâs all in good fun. No one expects you to actually ride Silverwing.â
âDonât they?â Tyland croaked, his voice barely a whisper. His eyes darted to Daemon again, whose smirk seemed to widen with every passing second.
You gave him a reassuring smile, though your own amusement was evident. âDaemon enjoys making people uncomfortable, but he doesnât expect you to ride a dragon. Itâs just a joke.â
Tyland blinked, trying to absorb your words, but it was hard to find comfort when Daemonâs eyes were still fixed on him like a cat playing with a particularly entertaining mouse.
âI assure you,â you continued, âSilverwing isnât saddling anyone tonight.â
Tyland exhaled in relief, though his heart was still racing. âI hope youâre right,â he muttered, glancing warily at the dragonlords at the head table. âBecause Iâm not exactly fond of being... airborne.â
At that, you couldnât help but chuckle softly. âIâll make sure no one forces you into the air,â you promised, your eyes sparkling with amusement.
But before Tyland could fully process your reassurance, Daemon raised his goblet again. âWell, Lord Tyland,â he said, grinning from ear to ear, âare you ready to embrace your Targaryen heritage and take to the skies?â
Tyland swallowed hard, feeling the eyes of the entire hall on him. He opened his mouth, searching for a polite way to decline without looking like a coward, when Viserys, still chuckling, waved a hand.
âLeave the man be, Daemon!â the king said, clearly enjoying himself. âLet him have his peace. Thereâll be plenty of time for dragonriding later.â
The hall erupted into laughter, and Tyland felt his face flush with both relief and embarrassment. He shot a grateful glance at Viserys, who seemed more than satisfied with how the evening had turned out.
Daemon, still smirking, raised his goblet in Tylandâs direction. âAnother time, then, Lord Tyland. But remember, itâs only a matter of time before youâre one of us.â
Tyland forced a smile, nodding stiffly. âOf course,â he managed, though he hoped that time was very, very far away.
As the laughter died down and the feast continued, you leaned in slightly, your voice low enough for only him to hear. âYou handled that well,â you said with a teasing smile.
Tyland shook his head, still feeling a little shaken by the ordeal. âIâm not sure well is the word Iâd use,â he muttered, though your soft laughter brought a smile to his face despite himself.
He took another deep breath, relaxing a little as the mood in the hall returned to its earlier festive atmosphere. It hadnât been the disaster he fearedâthough it had been close. And perhaps, as he glanced at you beside him, smiling and clearly amused by the absurdity of it all, this union wasnât going to be as terrifying as he had once thought.
As long as Daemon didnât try to strap him to a dragon again.
#house of the dragon#hotd x reader#hotd#hotd x you#hotd x y/n#game of thrones#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#fire and blood#hotd tyland#tyland lannister#tyland x reader#tyland x you#tyland x y/n#house lannister#house targaryen#a lion's leap#silverwing
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so eager - lando norris x reader
pairing : lando norris x fem!reader warnings : nwfs, smut, p.in.v, unprotected sex, dirty talk word count : 1,5k summary : lando is bored at the party and knows a way to make the night more interesting for both of you... a/n : i was DYING to write about lando and finally did! i hope you'll enjoy and feedback is always appreciated! also a huge thanks for all the love on my first writing, it's very appreciated <3 xoxo bunny
it wasn't even that late but lando was already waiting to get home. you and him had come to this party threw by one of your friends, you both had dressed up pretty nicely, you in your black silk dress and him in his black shirt.
at first enthusiastic about going to the party, he was now impatient, sitting in one of the chairs in the living room, his leg bouncing. lando was usually pretty patient, never really in a rush, but tonight he could have sweared he had never been more impatient in his life.
why you may wonder ? well because of you.
the way you laughed, the way your dress kept riding up your thighs despite you pulling it down again and again. the way you danced, the way you smiled... you were the hottest thing he had ever seen, everything about you seemed to make him insane.
he wanted you, no matter where he could. he wanted to kiss you, touch you, feel you. but you both weren't home and you hadn't gone out in a while and lando didn't want to ruin your fun.
but he could barely hide it anymore, acting like you weren't making him harder by the second was something lando could not do. he suddenly stood up and made his way to you. you were talking to one of the guests near the bar but he didn't mind interrupting you. having you right now was more than a want, it was a need.
you saw your boyfriend coming your way and smiled at him before seeing the look in his eyes : a mix of lust and determination. a look you were no stranger to.
"can we talk quickly?" lando said as he grabbed your waist, ignoring the person your were talking to. "sure, something's wrong?" he didn't answer you and just took you by the hand.
you followed him and knew damn well what your boyfriend wanted to talk to you about, and it made you laugh internally. infact it made you laugh so much that you decided you would play dumb and make it hard for lando to get what he wanted.
you arrived in a hallway, "so, is anything wrong lando?". he let go of your hand and got closer to you, dangerously closer. "let's get out of here", he had gotten so close that both your bodies had reached the wall and the sexual tension between you two could be cut with a knife at this point.
"why? aren't you having fun?" you said, your hands fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. "oh yes, sooo much fun" he answered in his usual sarcastic tone, "but i have funnier activities in mind sweetie".
he had you hooked and you couldn't deny that you wanted him too but you didn't want to give up this fast. "well.. you'll have to wait then i guess cause i am certainly having fun". his hand reached your waist and his mouth went next to your ear, "c'mon y/n, let me show you some real fun".
he backed off, took you by the hand again and opened the door right next to you before getting both of you into the room. the room happened to be a bathroom. "lucky bastard" you thought as he gently pushed you against the sink, his mouth going straight to your neck.
"iâve been thinking about that all night" lando said as he pulled your dress up your ass, his hands groping and malaxing your ass cheeks.
"well hurry up then, i ainât got all night". he chuckled against your neck before turning you around, your ass ending up right against his crotch and you could tell he really had been thinking about this moment all night.
"you want me to hurry up? donât worry i will" he said with a smirk. you then heard him undo his belt and quickly unzip his pants. he grabbed you by your waist and with his left hand easily pushed aside your panties.
he was breathing heavily against your neck and you arched your back when you felt his cock tease your entrance, going back in forth with his tip between your lips to coat himself in your juices.
"ready love?" he asked while giving little pecks to your shoulders and you nodded. he then finally got inside you, slowly but surely. him being on the thicker side always drove you crazy but could also be a bit scary, especially in those moments where he was so eager to be inside of you that you thought he would just get inside you in one quick movement.
but lando didnât and it reassured you, even in the heat of the moment he was always taking it slow and safe with you, hurting you was the last thing heâd want to do. after a few slow thrusts you were used to him, his length and thickness so he started thrusting deeper but also faster.
your hands were gripping for godâs sake on the sink, moans falling off your mouth like prayers. his right hand was firmly placed on your hips to guide you back to his own every time he pulled out of you. his left hand was holding you by your neck, not too hard, just enough to handle you.
the mixed sounds of skin slapping and of your moans were getting him closer and closer to his orgasm. you looked at him through the mirror and the sight was simply delicious : a few curls were falling on his sweaty forehead, his shirt half unbuttoned and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows.
he was glowing and his moans were becoming nearly as loud as yours. the deeper he got inside of you and the more he hit close to your sweet spot, he got you wrapped around his fingers, knowing exactly how to get you on the edge.
"funnier than talking to this random guy right" he said, almost out of breath. even tho it seemed like a question it definitively got out more as a tease, lando sometimes couldnât help himself but act (or at least sound) a little jealous but deep down he knew you were his and only his.
"you look so fucking good darling, my cock fits so well inside of you" he kept talking but you never answered, or you couldnât. everything was rushing in your mind and you were physically unable to form a sentence, even if you really tried.
"whoâs my good girl uh?" he asked, giving your ass a slap to make you understand that this time he wanted an answer. "oi, i asked you a question" he said before grabbing your neck and pulling you against his chest, gluing your body to his.
"itâs me, iâm the good girl" you finally answered him, making it as comprehensive as you could. "MY good girl, mine only" he snapped at you while tightening the grip around your neck.
he felt your walls getting tighter and tighter around his cock, alarming him that you were about to come. "youâre gonna come for me aight?", his thrusts also got sloppier and messier as he was also very close to coming.
"yes.. please lando make me come", you had told him exactly what he loved to hear and a loud whine got out of him. "fuck baby, iâm coming too"
with one deep thrust he made you come on his cock, your back arching more than you thought it was physically possible. his name left your mouth between curses, lando slowed down but was still chasing his own orgasm as much as he could.
"come on lando.. come inside me", and it didnât take more than this for him to spill it all inside of you. he held you close to him, both his arms holding you in a tight embrace while he was still -very slowly- thrusting in and out of you, making both of you come down from your highs.
"fuck.. that was fantastic", he whispered in your ear as he slide out of you and then got down on one knee to admire his cum spill out of your cunt. he then got back up and crashed his lips against yours, his hands sweetly tracing circles on the sides of your body.
"dâyou think they heard us?" you asked him, your head momentarily resting on his shoulder, your breathing still a bit shaky after such a big orgasm.
"i sure hope they did, you sounded so exquisite", you slapped his arm and he laughed out loud at your reaction, a laugh that you adored more than anything.
he kissed your forehead before grabbing a random towel in the room to clean both of you up, "no one will know" he said before throwing it in the laundry bin and giving you a wink, making you laugh as well.
you put your panties and dress back on correctly while he zipped his pants up before putting his belt back on.
"ok but letâs really get back home now, iâm tired" he told you while grabbing your hand as you got out of the bathroom, intertwining his hand with yours. "and whoâs fault is that?" you threw in his face with a cheeky smile. "donât you dare act like you didnât enjoy every bit of this" he said, landing a kiss on your forehead.
yes, you did enjoy every bit of this even tho you wouldnât admit it. but lando knew you didnât need to, he knew you did and your loud moans were loud enough to prove his point to himself.
#f1#f1 drivers#f1 imagine#f1 smut#f1 x reader#lando x reader#lando norris x reader#lando norris smut#lando norris imagine#lando norris x you#lando norris one shot#lando norris#f1 fanfic#gosh lando is too hot for this planet#formula one#smut#imagine#one shot
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Dragon Blood
Chapter 3: Your newfound fear of dragons causes you to run away from Dragonstone, but you're naive to think a certain prince with an odd fondness of you would let you go so easily.
Vermithor's claiming left you with endless nightmares. The monster's fury and the screams of the unfortunate dragonseeds haunted your nights and filled your days with dread. The castle, once a place of routine and stability, now felt a platter above hungry predators.
Desperation led you to the head of staff, where you made up a story about distant family in the Reach. "They've asked me to come live with them," you lied, your voice trembling but determined. "Please, I need to leave Dragonstone."
The head of staff was a stern woman with a soft spot for you. She eyed you suspiciously but eventually nodded. "Very well then. I'll arrange for your transfer to a local inn. You may leave as soon as you are ready."
The next day, you gathered all of your belongings and set out on the path leading away from Dragonstone. Each step was heavy with the weight of leaving behind the life you knew and stepping into the unknown.
Suddenly, the sky darkened as a massive shadow passed overhead. You looked up, heart-pounding, to see a dragon descending right onto you. Vermax landed with a powerful thud, sending dust and pebbles flying. You froze, your newfound phobia of dragons paralysing you.
Prince Jace dismounted, his armor gleaming in the sun, a picture of authority and grace.
He approached you with a measured stride, his expression unreadable. "It is high treason for a servant to lie about their supposed family in the Reach."
Fear seized you, and you took a step back. "My princeâ"
He cut you off, his eyes blazing with anger. "Do you have any idea how foolish you are? A pretty girl, travelling alone, unarmed and unprotected? Do you have any inkling of what could happen to you on the road? The dangers you could face? What if some slaver found you? What then?"
His words struck you like a blow, and you felt your knees weaken. "I just..."
âYou think you can just walk away?â Jacaerys said, his tone low and challenging. âAfter everything youâve seen, everything you know? You think that freedom is yours to take?â
âI want none of it! I just want to be safe,â you replied, your voice trembling.
âYouâre a Targaryen, y/n. Thereâs no running from that.â
The weight of his words pressed down on you. âIâm not! Im not... like you, not like the queen,â you whispered. âIâm just a servant. I have no wish to claim a dragon, not anymoreââ
You felt your lower lip trembled, your fears cutting off your speech.
Jacaerys softened slightly, though his tone remained stern and dismissive. "You're lucky. It's not every commoner who gets offered an escort from a prince."
You looked up at him in surprise. The closeness of his presence made your breath catch in your throat. His eyes were intense, studying you with a mix of frustration and something else, something darker.
You hesitated, fear and doubt swirling within you. Jacaerys stepped even closer, his presence overwhelming. âDo as I say,â he commanded, his tone brooking no argument. âYou will learn how to command a dragon. Claim your birthright at least once.â
Your heart pounded in your chest, but you could see no way out. He was your prince, your sovereign, and you had to obey him. You nodded reluctantly.
He took you by the hand, leading you to Vermax. The dragon's eyes followed your every move, and you could feel its rumble shaking the ground beneath you.
Jacaerys stepped closer, his presence both intimidating and oddly reassuring. "Say 'Lykiri to command Vermax to obey."
"Lykiri," you repeated nervously, your voice barely above a whisper.
"Louder," Jacaerys insisted. "Dragons respond to strength."
You took a deep breath and tried again, louder, âLykiri!"
Vermax's eyes flicked to you, and with a low rumble, the dragon shifted, acknowledging your command. Your eyes widened. The realization that the dragon had listened to you sent a rush of adrenaline through your veins.
Jacaerys stepped up on the dragons offered wing with practiced grace, then pulled you by the hand, his touch surprisingly gentle. "Vermax won't harm you," he assured, seating himself behind you on the saddle, his voice closer now, almost tender. "Feel the dragon's strength."
As you settle on the dragon's back, Jace's presence was solid behind you and reassuring. He guided your hands to grip the saddle, his own hands briefly covering yours.
âSay âsovesâ to command him to fly.â He spoke in your ear. âConfidently. Command him.â
âSoves!â You spoke loudly.
âAnd hold on tight.â He instructed, placing his hands on the saddle In front of You.
Syrax took off, the ground falling away beneath you. The sensation of flight, the rush of wind, and the power of the dragon beneath you were overwhelming. Despite your fear, there was an exhilaration, a feeling of freedom you had never known. The world below became a blur, the wind whipping through your hair, your heart pounding with a mix of terror and joy.
The force of the takeoff pressed you back against him. Wind whipped past you. The world below became a blur, and the vast sky opened up around you.
You gasped for breath, the wind making it difficult to breathe. Sensing your struggle, Jace tightened his grip around your waist, his hand moving to your chest, guiding you. âBreathe with me,â he said, his voice steady and close. âIn⌠and out. Slowly.â
You tried to follow his lead, inhaling deeply as he did, his presence grounding you. Gradually, your breath steadied, and you began to adjust to the sensation of flight, the terror giving way to awe.
Jace leaned closer, his voice just above the windâs roar. âYouâre doing well,â he said, his tone softer now, almost⌠proud.
The adrenaline coursing through you was intoxicating, and as Vermax soared through the skies, you couldnât help but feel a rush of exhilaration unlike anything youâd ever experienced.
Tears sprang to your eyes, not from fear, but from the overwhelming beauty of it allâthe vast expanse of the sky, the powerful dragon beneath you, and the realization that you were flying. Truly flying.
As tears streamed down your cheeks, Jacaerys noticed and pulled you closer. âAre you crying?â he asked, his tone somewhere between teasing and concern.
âI⌠Iâve never felt anything like this,â you admitted, your voice catching with emotion. âItâs⌠itâs the most amazing thing Iâve ever seen!â
You looked out over the landscape, your fear gradually giving way to amazement. The world seemed vast and beautiful from this height, and for a moment, all your worries and fears seemed small and distant.
When Vermax finally landed, your heart was still racing, but it was no longer from fear. Jace helped you dismount, his hands lingering on yours. His gloved hand wiped away your tears, your eyes shining with a newfound light.
"Thank you," you said, your voice barely a whisper.
He nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "Remember your place, y/n" he said, repeating the same words he once spoke to you. "Not everyone is a dragon. Don't let them think they can push you."
You nodded, feeling the weight of his words settle over you. As he mounted Vermax once more, you couldnât shake the feeling that this moment had changed something between you, something you couldnât quite name.
Jacaerys gave you one last look, his expression bittersweet, before Vermax took to the skies again, leaving you standing there, breathless and overwhelmed by the experience.
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
In the small town where youâd settled, life had taken on a simple turn. The days were long, filled with the clatter of mugs and the hum of conversation as you served folk in the tavern. Despite the work being tiring, there was a certain peace in the predictability of it all. The days were repetitive, but you were away from the politics and dangers of Dragonstone, away from the volatile nature of the court.
Yet, despite this newfound contentment, your thoughts often strayed back to the prince. In quiet moments, when your duties were done and you were alone in your small room above the tavern, you couldnât help but let your mind wander. It started innocently enough, a simple memory on his sharp gaze, the way his eyes seemed to pierce through you. But then, your thoughts became something moreâsomething that made your breath hitch and your heart race.
You remembered the way he had stood so close to you, his tall frame towering over you, the heat of his body radiating against your skin. The memory of his voice, low and commanding, echoed in your ears, stirring something deep within you. There was a part of you that couldnât forget the intensity of his touch, the way his hands guided you, strong and possessive, as if you were something that belonged to him.
Your thoughts became bolder, imagining what it would feel like if he had pulled you closer, if his lips had brushed against your skin. The idea of his power over you sent a thrill through your body, a tantalizing mixture of fear and desire. You found yourself longing for that feeling againâthe rush of adrenaline, the helplessness of being under his control, the undeniable pull between you.
But with that heat came a deep sense of shame. You were low born. Nothing more than a commoner, a servant, and he was a prince of the realm. How could you, a mere tavern girl now, dare to feel this way about someone so far above your station? The very idea of it felt wrong, inappropriate, yet you couldnât stop the thoughts from creeping in, couldnât stop your body from reacting to the memories of him. The shame gnawed at you, making you feel small and unworthy, but it also made the desire burn hotter, a forbidden fire you didnât know how to extinguish.
In your free time, youâd found solace in the company of a local pastor, a kind man who offered to teach you to read. You took to the lessons eagerly, and in time, he began to trust you with his collection of books. Most were on the Targaryens and their dragons.
The stories of the dragons captivated you. You learned their names, their temperaments, and the legends about them. And with each passage, your connection to the past, to the blood in your veins, grew stronger, even if you tried to suppress it.
But even more, these stories fed your thoughts of Jace. The more you read about the Targaryens, the more you understood the weight of the name he carried, the expectations, and the burden of his lineage. You wondered if he ever felt trapped by it, as you felt by your own place in society. And as you delved deeper into these histories, your fantasies of him grew more vivid, more intense, until you could almost feel him with you, his presence a ghostly weight that pressed against you in the night.
You couldnât stop wanting him, couldnât stop imagining what it would be like if the world were different, if you were different. You kept these feelings to yourself, unsure of what they meant or what you would even do if you were to ever see him again. For now, the tavern was your world, and Jace was a distant memoryâone that haunted your nights and invaded your dreams with yearning.
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
Jacaerys Velaryon had little time for distractions. His days were filled with dutiesâsecuring alliances for his mother, studying the intricate web of Targaryen bloodlines, and practicing his skills in combat. Every moment was a reminder of the precarious position his family held in the realm, the constant threat of war looming on the horizon. There was no room for error, no room for weakness.
And yet, despite his best efforts, his thoughts would often stray to you.
It was infuriating how easily you crept into his mind. A mere servant, a girl of no consequence, and yet he couldnât stop thinking about you. It started innocently enough, a fleeting memory of your purple wide-eyed expression when he had pulled you from the throne room, saving you from Vermithor. But those memories became something more.
He remembered the way you had trembled under his touch, the way your breath hitched when he had drawn close. It should have pleased him, the power he held over you, but instead, it had sparked something elseâa desire that he found both confusing and inappropriate. You were beneath him, a commoner with no claim to anything, yet the memory of your body pressed against his, your soft curves against his hardened armor, lingered in his mind, refusing to be banished.
As he pored over maps and documents, his thoughts would drift to the feel of your skin under his hands, the warmth of your body against his. He wondered what it would be like to explore that warmth further, to strip away the layers of clothing that separated you and discover your body for himself. The thought alone made his blood run hot, and he cursed himself for allowing such distractions.
His days were a blur of meetings and training, his nights spent in restless sleep, plagued by dreams in which you featured prominently. He dreamed of claiming you, of possessing you in a way that no one else could, of making you his despite the vast chasm that separated your stations in life.
It was maddening. You were nothing, a nobody, and yet the thought of you with another man, of someone else touching touching whats his, filled him with a rage. How dare you make him feel this way, weak and conflicted?
The internal struggle only intensified as he learned more about the Targaryen bloodlines. It was that realization that troubled him the most. You were of Targaryen blood, however diluted, and that meant something.
His rational mind insisted that you were still nothing more than a servant, your bloodline a mere footnote in the grand history of his house. But another part of him, a darker, more primal one, demanded he claim you, possess you, and ensure that no one else could.
Even as he trained with the sword, his muscles burning from the exertion, his mind would wander to the way you had looked at him, the mixture of fear and something else in your eyes. It was intoxicating, the way you had both feared and desired him, and it made him want to see that look again, to push you further and see just how far he could go before you broke.
And then there was the shame. The shame of wanting someone so far beneath him, the shame of knowing that he was betraying everything he had been taught by even entertaining these thoughts. You were a bastard, a servant, a commoner, and he was a prince of the realm. It was absurd, scandalous even, to think that there could be anything between you. Yet, despite the shame, despite the knowledge that he was crossing a line, he couldnât stop himself.
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
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#hotd fanfic#hotd season 2#hotd#house of the dragon#jace velaryon imagine#jace velaryon#jace velaryon x reader#jacaerys velaryon imagine#jecaerys velaryon fluff
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