#mydei angst
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smilley-mcb · 2 days ago
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“Will there be reunion?”
Mydei x reader
Words count: 865
Warning: angst, might be ooc, no comfort, reader is a nameless, Spoiler for main quest ver 3.1, fanfiction
Pt.1
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Hair strands sway in the air. The sky in Amphoreus is still as bright as ever. With the sound of the bustling city, this scenery would be one of the kind for anyone who takes a look from where you stand. Yet, your mind is nowhere near to enjoying the view. Your ears catch the sound of footsteps approaching you from behind.
“So you are here”
A low voice calls out to you.
“Lord Mydei…”
Your voice weakly leaves your lips.
“Are you here to say goodbye?” You continue, back still turning to him.
“So you have heard. Is it from Phainon?”
“Is that important right now?”
You retort back, much to his surprise. The girl who would usually talk with such kindness in her words now making every letter out of her lips sounds so sour. Mydei falls in silence, not knowing how to continue the conversation. And before he can say any words, you cut through his thoughts.
“You choose to leave without any notice. You choose to… leave… without telling me anything!”
You turn to face him. Not a single tear fall on your face but oddly from his perspective, you clearly look like you are in a lot of pain. Your expression distorts into heartbroken, sad and even a hint of reproach.
“Do you truly have to do this?”
“This is my duty. I have to”
“Will you ever come back?”
Following a hesitation from Mydei, he shakes his head slightly.
“Likely no”
Determination swims in his eyes. Those beautiful pupils look back at you just like everyday. But instead of giving you the warm feeling like it normally would, it’s making you feel stupid right now. Mydei looks so calm, as if you are the only one affected by this decision. You have only known him for a few weeks since you, Dan Heng and Stelle were attacked and fell into Amphoreus. Yet, during those few weeks, you and Mydei had somehow grown closer than everyone else. And now he’s telling you he’s leaving? And he feels completely okay with that?
You don’t even know what to feel right now. Should you be mad? Should you feel betrayed or be supportive of his decision? Now, you are not some princess that would throw a tantrum and refuse to understand why he has to do this. But it just hurts so much. It feels like the world just drops onto your entire being. The thought of never seeing Mydei again in your life is like a tear to every single tissue of your heart.
Looking at you, your painful expression is eating Mydei’s inside up. For a brief second, there is a wavering thought somewhere in his mind about this decision. Unfortunately, the hesitation was quickly eliminated as soon as it appeared. Mydei doesn’t want to leave you like this. Heck, he even feels like beating himself up for making you feel like that. But this is his duty, for Amphoreus, for his citizens and…for you.
A quiet apology falls from his lips.
“I’m sorry”
“…regret…”
“What?”
“I regrets it”
You turn your gaze straight up to his eyes. But instead of sadness and heartbreak, right now in your eyes, there are hate, hurt and regrets.
“Mydeimos… I regret ever meeting you. Maybe if I didn’t go with Dan Heng and Stelle to get here, I wouldn’t get hurt like this! I wouldn’t have my heart broken in the first place!”
A glance of surprise takes over Mydei’s expression. Somewhere in his heart, there is a painful feeling starting to spread throughout his entire being. He has done it. He broke you into pieces. The realization is not completely unexpected but when Mydei sees it with his own eyes, it hits him like a thousand attacks from the battle with Nikador he just fought.
“Go…do what you have to do”
You shift your gaze down to your feet, no longer wanting to look at him. You are afraid, afraid that if you look up at him, you will just have to get on your knees and beg him to not leave you. Begging him to not go and stay here with you.
Mydei feels his body become numb from all the pain that he’s having. Unlike many other scars and wounds he had endured in battles, this pain is unbearable, taking him to the ground, feeling like succumbing to it, giving it all up to stay back. But he can’t. He has to do it.
On that note, Mydei takes one last gaze at you. Those soft features that he secretly admires so much may not be presented in his life ever again. Such kindness that he received from you was heavenly. You had made him feel alive and mortal the past few weeks. And he has the audacity to break it. He crumples it to the ground, all of it. He breaks you, his precious princess.
Having a painful look in his eyes, Mydei let determination continue to drive him. Turning on his back and walking away. Away from you. Forever.
Leaving a small figure standing there, feeling like the end of the world just fell upon her.
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Hope u guys have a good cry.
English is not my first language so please spare me if you see any grammar errors 🙏
I’ll post pt2 and pt3 soon.
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sheaniamh · 13 days ago
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Believable reply from Mydei after an advice from Phainon
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beetlejuicyy · 1 month ago
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Just a Dream
Mydei’s favorite place to be was between your plump, soft thighs. He loved the way you trembled slightly when his cold cheek, bruised by a day of demonstrating the true Kremnoan warrior nature, cleansed with cold water and your soft hums only a moment before, touched your warm skin. Mydei himself felt a weak shiver run down his spine as his sense of smell was assaulted by the sweet floral oils you used to bathe in mixed with the already familiar scent of your pussy. He’s been there many times, too many to count but not enough to be satisfied. How could he? When just a flick of his tongue was all it took for you to arch your back above the sheets, grab his golden hair a little too roughly. Mydei loved pleasuring you, probably more than he cared for anything else, and it was most obvious in bed.
“Do that again.” You would let out a breathy moan, telling him whatever you liked, praising the way his tongue brushed against your sensitive bud, how his lips kissed every inch of you, how he sucked on your clit with just enough strength to leave you asking for more.
Of course he wouldn’t comply right away. Instead, he would chuckle lightly at your desperation, shifting his attention to your tummy, your hips and, his favorite, your thighs. For a man of his reputation, a warrior, a savage, he was exceptionally gentle with his lips. Maybe his hands were rough, his hips a little too violent when thrusting into you, his hold too tight on your weaker body, but his lips have always, always been as light as a feather on your skin. Part of it was because Mydei wanted to enjoy his time as much as he could. After all, Mydei ate you out for his own pleasure first and foremost. As opposed to times when he just let out his frustration through sex or was simply in the mood for a quick fuck, at the end of the day when he patiently waited for you in his royal chambers you knew you were in for a goddess treatment. His favorite pastime was you, exploring your body, finding out things you liked, things that turned you off. Finding out how your body reacts to his touch. And, heavens, you were responsive.
“Mydei, please…” His gaze would quickly shift to look up at you. His grip on your legs was too firm, forcing them to stay spread. He was unaware of how tightly the fat of your thighs was pressed between his biceps and forearms and he would loosen his grip while muttering an empty apology.
You learned just how much he enjoyed the taste of your cunt on his lips, his tongue dripping with your slick, pretty quickly. Mydei would force orgasm after orgasm from your body as many times as he felt like going, ignoring your efforts to push him away or press your legs closed, the overstimulation too much for you to handle. He would never confess to any living soul, but Mydei often thought that having your thighs pressed on either side of his head with your rawest uncontrolled force, his face still buried in your cunt until he couldn’t breathe anymore would be an extraordinary way to die. Maybe even death would find this pathetic enough to take him.
It never happened, though. As you soaked in his private bath, Mydei sat by your side on a cushion, his back resting against a marble column. The only sound was the clear splashing of water while you quietly poured it over your shoulders and back.
“Your breasts are swollen.” He hummed, voicing the thought without pondering. He noticed it before, when his hands felt different, smaller when cupping your tits, when you whined in discomfort and rushed his hands lower on your body.
“Well I- my monthly bleeding is approaching.” The remark made you felt exposed and vulnerable, although he had seen you naked so many times. Still, you quickly submitted to his call when he gestured for you to come closer by the edge of the pool.
“Make sure to rest well.” Mydei’s low voice poured like honey in your ear as his hand found its way to your damp hair, caressing it.
“I would if someone let me.” Your playful banter earned a soft smile from his lips. For a moment, you were reminded of the sheer difference between the two of you. You were looking up at the crown prince of Kremnos, a brute by all accounts, tall and muscular, with bloody red lines engraved over his thick skin. Yet his expression softened at your sight, his thundering voice quieted down, his deadly strength controlled.
Mydei didn’t reply. Instead, he took his time to look at you from up close, from your round eyes sparkling with life to your small but plump lips stained with pomegranate juice. You looked like a doll, like a statue sculpted by the most renowned artist. His gaze shifted to your neck and shoulders, light purple marks blooming on your skin, a summary of the past hours spent together. The fullness of your breasts was traceable underwater, and he knew there were more signs of his claim on you the lower he searched. You looked ethereal. Otherworldly. Had you not been paying so much attention to counting the love marks the crown prince had left over your body, you would have seen the pure devotion in his eyes.
“Will you marry me?” The question was simple, as light as the night breeze. It was the second time he voiced his thoughts without much contemplation. What was there to consider anyways? You were the apprentice of the high priestess of Nikador, the most respected position in Castrum Kremnos, besides his, of course. You would inherit your duty from your grandmother eventually, just as he would become king one day. If not Mydeimos, son of Gorgo, who would be worthy enough to marry you?
The air was thick and warm in contrast to Mydei’s cold sweat when his eyes opened, the empty familiar room proof enough that everything had been just a dream. Still, his arm reached out over the sheets, as if looking for your warmth, in hopes you would be sleeping next to him. The night in Okhema was quiet and bright, the full moon casting a silver glow over Kephale’s enormous figure in the distance. Mydei walked over to the balcony, taking a deep breath in an attempt to tame his racing heart.
They never found your body. He never found your body, and damned be all the titans who refused to bring you back to him, he looked for a sign for days on end. In the ruins that barely resembled the glorious Castrum Kremnos of old, he overturned every rock, searched every corner, went through countless corpses across the city to look for you. Had you managed to escape? Yet, you’ve never set foot in Okhema. Was your end so violent that your body was not recognizable anymore? Mydei, who has waged so much war, breathed violence and tasted so much blood in his lifetime, was appalled at the thought. His fist fell heavy against the cold marble railing of the balcony, like a hammer ready to shatter everything in its way.
Even if death itself had granted you the eternal embrace he was denied of, Mydei would descend into the abyss to find you.
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Masterlist
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ag40249 · 1 month ago
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try to be gentle while tearing me apart
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gojoidyll · 7 days ago
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IS MYDEI CHEATING ON YOU? you can't help but to question it as his actions keep getting weirder and weirder...
mydei x pregnant!wife!reader
angst
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It was like a slap to the face when Mydei came home smelling like another woman. It made your nose crinkle and your mind wander as you hugged him an uneasy feeling soon settling in your stomach as you greeted him.
“How was your day?”
“Good.”
You bit the inside of your cheek as you noticed another thing off with your husband.
For the past month or so, he’s been smelling like another woman and has even been giving you such short end responses to your questions, he doesn’t engage in conversation and even stops cuddling with you when you both go to bed. It makes your whole body feel uneasy.
“Did anything interesting happen today?”
“No.”
You resisted the urge to reach out for him as you followed behind him, but you were quickly losing him as he took such larger and faster steps than your waddled ones. Your pregnancy slowing you down a bit.
Usually he would walk with you. So why…?
The thought and the obvious perfume that wasn’t yours still wafted in the air in Mydei’s absence as he left you in the dust. Seeing as how he left you following after him instead of walking by your side like he usually does, it caused you to stop and stand still for a moment in the empty hallway.
Was he cheating on you?
The thought scared you, terrified you even as you found yourself pacing a bit as you turned to go to your personal study for some peace and quiet – not that Mydei would care to look for you, lately he hasn’t been seeking you out at all.
It was already night when Mydei came home and now it was at an ungodlly hour as you continued to fret about in your study, your body refusing to go to bed where Mydei undoubtedly was. You honestly didn’t know what to do.
Confront him?
Ask indirectly about it?
Your hand absentmindedly rested over your tummy, a small kick made you smile bit, it seems your baby was as awake as you were.
Standing up, you decided to head towards the kitchen, your thoughts a jumbled mess as you stumbled your way through your home before stopping at the sound of Mydei’s voice in the kitchen.
“I know.”
You peeked around the corner, your eyes focused on the phone in his hands as he talked to someone on the other side of the line.
“I’ll meet you there tomorrow.”
“Mmm.”
“I know.”
“You said that already.”
“Hsk, shut it.”
You furrowed your brow as you ducked away and moved to leave the hallway leading to the kitchen. Your appetite long gone.
Maybe he was cheating on you?
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sleepynoons · 2 months ago
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Under the Same Sky
Mydeimos and you are husband and wife. In ancient China, where the heavens and earth exist in the same dimension, your husband slays beasts and demons to protect the Emperor and the Holy Nation. You yourself are closely related to divinity, though it is a relationship you wish to abandon, because the heavenly forces have only wished the worst upon you. And it seems nothing has changed, when the divine wants to destroy your and Mydei's relationship.
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mydei x afab!f!reader, chinese mythology!au, nsfw
word count: ~17,400
cw: angst/slight comfort, minor character death, religious/spiritual imagery/themes/depictions, graphic descriptions of violence/blood/death, unprotected sex, marking kink, a singular instance of a blood kink, undertones of codependency, unintended phainon slander (truly just for the plot)
notes: to my beloved beta, @staraxiaa, i love you. truly. you have such a beautiful mind and an unmatched cadence to your words. thank you for all that you do for me, and this piece would not have come out of the vault without your encouragement and advice.
to readers, would soo appreciate reblogs, comments, and tags on this piece! i always put a bit of my soul in my writing, but truly, as a chinese person myself, this fic is especially special in my heart. i may post an author's note (update: you can find my thoughts here), but for now, i hope you are able to walk away from this piece knowing a bit about my heritage, culture, and mythology, though there may be several historical inaccuracies LOL
EVERYONE IN the village knows Mydeimos loves you and you love Mydeimos. In particular, the elders, those who often sit under the weeping willows at noon and fan themselves with their cheap linen imitations of the gongshan, laugh amongst themselves about the blush that had blossomed on Mydeimos’ face with your first appearance and has never left since, until the faint outlines of their grandchildren appear on the border between the horizon and the flat earth. Because who could believe that their village chief, a figure of authority and demand – though a son he will forever be remembered as in the villagers’ eyes and memories  – would ever look so pathetically adorable. But at this point, it is not a question anymore, moreso a teasing remark the people make in the presence of their adored chief.
And you, a girl of an unknown origin, from another collective li and li away, have also become a beloved member of this village. Even if you were not Mydeimos’ wife, your kindly manner, speaking always with a warming wisp of a smile, and the gentle curve of your upturned palm have won over the hearts of the villagers here.
It is clear to everyone that, by the decree of the heavenly gods above and their kindred spirits down on this earth in the forms of the water, leaves, wind, and destiny, that you and Mydeimos are for each other, to always be intertwined and inseparable in this vast, vast universe.
My love.
Mydei – just Mydei in your presence – twitches in his sleep, the magnetic pull of your voice coming from somewhere between the depths of his half-conscious, sleepy haze and the echoes from the four sun-stricken brick walls of your shared bedroom. You tantalize him already, when he has so much to do, so much to worry, so much to protect. After all, being one of the Emperor’s generals is no casual title, and one can tell because all he can boast about is the long hours of never-ending work and the deplorably large number of men he had to send to the infirmary the other day for they all lacked strength comparable to his. Indeed, he has much to be concerned about, yet in the spare moments of tranquility he is granted in the early morning, he allows himself to bask in both the warmth from the dawn sunlight that streams through the bamboo folding screens and radiates from your lulling tone.
Mydei.
He blinks awake, your silhouette discerned with more clarity with each closing and opening. You are holding the blanket up to your chest with one arm, while your other reaches over to stroke his hair, straightening out strands that have splayed themselves across his forehead, intermingling with the lengths of his eyelashes and paralleling the cut of his jawline.
You will be late.
Displeased at your reminder, he grunts and leans into your palm, the shape of it meant to caress and cradle his cheek. You do not make any noticeable reaction, except for the slight lifts at the corners of your lips. And you let him assume control of your hand, relinquish your time as well, so that you can connect with him before he sets off for another long day at work. Though work is never just work for someone as noble as Mydei, as even the trek to the Palace is fraught with danger, where assassins and mercenaries can be prowling in the shadows, waiting for the right timing to strike, attack, kill your lover, the chief of a village a slight ways away from the Capital, a general to the Emperor and this Holy Nation. 
Mydei then cups one of his hands over yours, and sits up with your fingers interlaced. With a quick glance, he is sated and actually smirks at the marks that bruise, bloom, and flourish across the delicate skin of your shoulders and neck. He leans over to kiss a spot that is undoubtedly the most stubborn of them all, the last that will fade from remembrance. 
I know. I am on my way now.
And, without another word, he swings his legs over the side of the bed and gets up to stride over to the washroom. You watch from your position, eyes lingering over the hardened and muscled build of his legs, the jagged scars that etch themselves into the broad scope of his back and sides, and the tanned lines that have begun to form on his arms, a sign that the height of spring has arrived. You wait until he has left the room to release a pleased hum before you, too, stretch and prepare yourself for your day.
In the courtyard, it is more than obvious that spring has fully encompassed the Holy Nation. The magnolia buds are green, hurried and eager in their pursuit for growth, and the scent of damp soil has begun to dissipate from the lack of overnight snow and frost. A young female servant, a recent addition to your handful of helpers, speaks in rapid, excited breaths as she serves you powdered cakes in bite-sized pieces and pours oolong tea into a brown porcelain cup, reciting news about the Emperor’s several princes she had overheard when she went to the market earlier today. You cannot help but chuckle as the servant takes a seat beside you, her arms propped up on the table with her face resting on her fist, humming as any young girl in love would. It just so happens that your head maid comes over at this moment and scolds the younger one.
Get up! Where are your manners? Apologize!
You simply wave them both off and ask the young servant to continue her relay. After all, she is not of age yet, so she can only daydream, and who are you to not indulge in such whimsies. She tells you of the second youngest prince, one of three in her generation, and she fantasizes of colliding into him in the streets as he makes an escape from the Capital. It is no surprise that the prince, along with all nine of his royal brothers, are mischievous, something that many Daoist priestesses have foretold as they ventured in and out of the Palace, prophecies that trace back even before the births of many of the Emperor’s sons. Yet the young servant’s fantasies are far too exaggerated and dependent on coincidence to ever materialize, so after a while, you begin to ask her other questions.
How are this season’s harvests? Are there murmurings of strife and conflict along the Northern border? Are the rabbits back?
She responds accordingly: seasonal goods, such as green peas and plums, seem to be more expensive and sparse than last year; no outbreaks so far, and people are anticipating a peaceful year ahead; the rabbits have begun to leave their burrows! In fact, regarding that last point, the servant urges you to finish your tea faster so you can visit the babies, and despite the exasperated protests from your head lady-in-waiting, you gulp the last dregs of your drink, bits of loose tea leaves included, before gathering your dress into your fists and rushing out of the pavilion.
Rabbits are cautious creatures. They are aware of their disadvantages and their being on the bottom of the food chain. And while this village that you have become a part of and that Mydei grew up in has long taken root in this region of the Holy Nation, the local flora and fauna have yet to fully adapt to the presence and caprices of humans. Where you are from, it is quite the opposite, in that the people of your origin have learned to assimilate with this earth, rather than the other way around. Where you are from, the rabbits are not afraid to come out of their burrows and shallow mounds to peer curiously – fearlessly – at their human neighbors.
As you and the young servant approach a lush corner of the courtyard, your steps decrease in stride and bumbling excitement. Instead, the two of you tread with silent passes, almost as if you were rabbits yourselves. And when the two of you make it to the edge of the walkway, you stand still and hold your breaths, waiting earnestly for even the most fleeting of a glimpse of the animals.
Since your youth, you have had a talent for disappearing, in the most neutral sense possible. With ease that a person of ego cannot bear to imagine or replicate, you are capable of shedding off all and any attachments you have to your person and melding into the sways of the wind, the humming of the bees, the thrums of the soil beneath your feet. You showed this ability of yours to Mydei before, albeit unintentionally. It was happenstance, something you had done out of habit when he had taken you out for a stroll along a manmade pond near the east end of the Capital and you were trying to feed a pair of restless magpies. You were only shaken out of your illusory state from the grounding pressure of his hand against your shoulder blade.
With an ability like that, you could easily conceal yourself and become an assassin.
You shrugged in response because, unlike him, there is no obligation for you to pursue the art or administration of death, and you figure you will never have to either.
This is all to say that, had it not been for the chirp of excitement from your lady-in-waiting, the rabbits would have approached you out of sheer intrigue. And as quickly as they shuffled out of their home, their grey and white whiskers and fluff ruffling in the breeze, their beady eyes take note of you and your servant before they recede back to safety. Your lady-in-waiting sighs with palpable adoration and lovesickness, and you promise her that there will be another chance tomorrow.
For the rest of the morning, you eat a quick breakfast under a pagoda, admiring the jasmine blossoms that flourish around the circumference, before making way to your fitting. Fittings only occur when special occasions are imminent, and with a banquet at the Palace in celebration of the fourth prince’s birthday occurring in two weeks, your other ladies-in-waiting have brought back several robes from the market for you to try on, no doubt on Mydei’s orders. There is a generous collection of blush, cream, and sunshine brocade and linen that await you, and as you dress and undress, tie and untie, spin and spin, it is unanimously agreed upon by all of your attendants that nothing will be returned. There is also a tray that holds various accessories, most notably a tasteful amalgamation of embroidered fans and gold-accented jinbu, and those are all kept as well. Of course, upon realizing that all of these valuables are yours and yours only, you pass on a message to one of Mydei’s servants to also visit the market with expectations of purchasing new cords for your husband’s hair, as well as a replacement for his worn yudai.
Then, it is lunch, but you tend to spend this time with the other villagers. With a parasol in one hand and a basket of tangerines and dried dates in the other, you head to the edge of the village, accompanied by two guards for formality’s sake. At the perimeter, where brick walls intercept a wide, trodden path, there are several benches and tables so that both residents and travelers alike can rest. When you first arrived, you, too, sat down here, gulping down a flask of water as you observed the hustle and bustle – not as busy as the Capital, but festive enough to indicate decent business and progress.
The elders and a few mothers already present greet you with dips of their chin. Usually, citizens are to greet those of nobility or high-ranking government positions with strict curtsies and bows, and while Mydei insists on the custom in speech, he does not uphold this rule quite as stringently. The reason for your visits are twofold: to know your people and to gather information. Though you have not yet born descendants of your and Mydei’s own, you have come to realize that children have sharp ears and loose mouths, fervent in their interminable search for entertainment and delight. The village is close enough for children to pursue education in the Capital if their parents so wished, so until many of them return, you pass your time underneath the arching path of the sun exchanging pleasantries and discussing matters.
By the time the little ones return, the sun is bathed in orange gold, half-concealed by the mountains you had once traversed, and there are but a few of the fruits remaining, just enough to quench their parched throats. As children do, they clamor to their respective guardians, complaining about the heat and how they are so sweaty and tired that there is no conceivable way they can continue to study later tonight. They also recognize you, and with a lightheartedness that more often occurs between friends of the same generation, they whine for your treats. You laugh as you hand the last pieces out, as you would when feeding cabbage bits to rabbits.
Upon your return home, the moon already having replaced the sun as the night’s guardian, you dismiss your guards, so you can bathe while the rest of the household eats. You much prefer solitude when you are in a vulnerable state, and your ladies-in-waiting are no exception to this preference, even if they are no stranger to a woman’s body. Sat on a stool, you strip yourself, letting all the layers collapse in a disheveled pile, and remove any pins and beaded strings from your hair. By now, your servants have become familiar with your ways, so there is already steaming water in the bronze bathtub, so you directly step in and submerge yourself up until your neck.
The hot water is not very pleasant against your warm skin, but you stay regardless, as spring evenings can still be unforgiving and biting. You watch as the water sloshes against the solid walls of the tub, causing the steam to waver before resuming its vertical ascendance, and do nothing even when a few splashes escape and drip down the exterior. After all, this time is allotted for you to think, nothing more. Your thoughts are preoccupied with declining trade with farmers outside of the Capital, many citing long-lasting droughts and fires as primary culprits, and there have been a sharp incline of those suffering from heat strokes and asthma. Some have even mentioned hallucinations of more than a single sun in the sky, and while you are not one to be affected by superstitious or mythical stories, you do find it odd that there have been multiple accounts of such a phenomenon from various distinct folks. These are pieces of information you must report to Mydei, though it is too early to draw any actionable conclusions.
You arise from your bath half an hour later, when the water has simmered down to a lukewarm. You dry yourself, adorn a simple beige gown with a matching robe over it, and make your way to the kitchen. By the moon’s position, if all goes smoothly, your husband should return in about two hours, more than enough for you to prepare his dinner.
Although you are not obligated to cook, you have sensed Mydei’s hesitation when it comes to consuming food that is prepared by those he is unfamiliar with. He trusts you and the villagers, but many of your household’s servants are from the Capital or elsewhere. Therefore, for both his sanity and safety, you have taken on the responsibility to provide him meals so that he may eat in peace at home. Besides, it is also an opportunity for the two of you to simply be together.
Just as you have set the last plate onto the dining table, Mydei returns, lamellar plates thunking and chain mail jostling with every heavy step he takes. It is a heaviness that resounds in your heart, for it is a reflection of his fatigue and, more importantly, the weight of the responsibilities he bears.
He does not come to greet you, not yet. He does not like appearing in front of you with his armor still on. He wants to avoid bringing in the stench of blood and grief into this abode he shares with you – does not want to taint you, his person of comfort and solace, with the violence you have no desire to take part in. Though, try as he might, deep down he knows it is to no avail, as his hands, the same ones he uses to touch and feel you, are already stained with death.
In the small shed, surprisingly compact and spare for a master of many weapons, he shrugs everything off with laborious groans. As each weighted iron slab and scratchy sheet of chain mail drops to the ground, Mydei lavishes in the slow regain of freedom in his movement. Lastly, he pulls off his helmet, and with a quick rub of his sleeve against a permanent smudge, he sets it on top of a drawer that contains duplicates of his uniform, first aid, and short daggers. He does not linger, and instead, swivels around to head to where you are.
When Mydei rounds the corner to stand in front of the kitchen entrance, double doors swung wide open, he cannot help but pause in his tracks, just a few paces away from joining you at the table in the center of the room. You peer at him from your seat, your chin resting in a divot formed by your palms, and also observe him, his face shrouded in shadows.
It is not so much a staring contest as it is a reverent yearning for one another. For no reason at all, it seems the two of you have a habit of practicing restraint – hesitation – before allowing yourselves to indulge in each other.
Come sit beside me.
I will. Let me admire you first.
And so you wait.
From Mydei’s perspective, you are the most beautiful at this time of the night. It is not to say that you are not in the morning, when you are still slumbering beside him with your hands splayed across his bare chest, or when you are pinned underneath him, a sinful image of you in your most disheveled state – his stained robe splayed out underneath your figure, your lungs heaving with pitched whines, your knees trembling with indecision as you fail to choose between spreading yourself open so that he can enter deeper or closing, and thereby restricting his movement, because the pleasure is unbearable. You are always his most precious, but he believes you are at your best when you are working towards an objective. And since your marriage, you have honored his same priority in protecting his people, and he will forever admire this determination of yours.
Truthfully, he never required such a sense of responsibility in his wife. In fact, before he met you, he had never imagined shouldering this duty with anyone else, let alone a stranger from somewhere far beyond. But you are no longer a stranger, and now, during your shared dinners, you are able to speak of this place as if you grew up here, alongside him and all the other villagers. You speak with incredible depth and acute intuition, and fortified by the precision and clarity in your words, he cannot help but think that, despite your personal aversions towards leadership and confrontation, you deserve to stand beside him in the ranks.
The oil lamps and candles on the dining table brighten your face with a gentle golden glow. He can see the flames’ flickering in your eyes, and behind you, he can hear the crackle of smoldering wood and charcoal. He walks over and takes a seat beside you, noticing the faint traces of fire and herbs that linger in your hair and at your shoulders. Pressing the side of his thigh against yours, he picks up his chopsticks and begins to eat, a gesture for you to initiate the conversation.
There is noticeable delay. We can no longer ignore the growing connection between the slowdown of trade with the recurring delusions of multiple suns in the sky. 
Do you think it could be divine punishment?
If we had incurred the wrath of Tian, we would have long suffered, and the Emperor would have justified the recent happenings. Our deities have no interest or patience for prolonged torture.
We will need to wait then. We need to know more, or else we will be searching in vain.
No.
You set down your bowl and look straight ahead, peering outside at the courtyard – or rather, at a point somewhere beyond the walls of the courtyard. Mydei can feel your presence wax and wane, expand and recede, until it settles down into a light thrum, akin to the tranquil qi of lotus petals and mossy creeks. He can still see you, without a doubt, but he knows that if he had not been in this room with you right now, he would have never been able to find you here without incredible effort.
It is magical, truly, how you can quiet your presence. In his many years of training and fighting, he has met only a handful of incredible soldiers who can do the same. He was only able to gain this ability himself after maturing as a person and facing the near-death consequences of overwhelming, unbound bloodlust in the midst of combat. That is not to claim that you did not learn in the same ways, but he cannot confirm nor deny because, for better or worse, you never speak of the past. Otherwise, outside of the army, he only knows of the high priests and priestesses that can also adopt a kind of otherworldly aura during their rituals and prayers.
He chews slowly, more preoccupied with observing your profile. Your features are unperturbed, essentially blank, and there is an unfocused fog in your eyes, sharply distinct from the ambition burning within your irises at the beginning of dinner. You shiver, probably to your own ignorance, and he places his things down so he can take off his robe and wrap your shoulders with it. To his surprise, and contentment, you instinctively lean over to rest your shoulder against his without disrupting your thoughts. Just as you wait for him, he waits for you.
By the time the shortest of the three candles, once a sixth of its original length, is about to extinguish, you come to, and the light in your eyes returns as well.
Innate divinity – not to be conflated with the ability to call forth divine powers or forces – is only granted to a few select individuals. More than likely, there will be no need to search the common folk.
Let us begin at the Palace.
Will the Emperor take to this idea?
Perhaps he already has conjectures of his own. I shall request an audience.
Divinity is an intricate, mysterious subject. Deeply embedded in the belief systems and cultural underpinnings of this Holy Nation, most people are naturally mesmerized and fearful of Tian’s deities and their abilities. Even those who are born with divine abilities, namely the Emperor and a select few of his children, and those who can invoke divinity through sacred objects and incantations, such as priests, priestesses, and monks, advise all to be cautious of incurring heavenly wrath. 
When you first heard of the hallucinations, you thought it to be the aftershocks of severe heatstroke. Then, when many more farmers and traders began to verify the sighting of various suns, it became clear that the divine was involved because, when individuals who have no capacity for divinity are exposed to these mystical forces, their minds and behaviors can be continuously affected. That must mean they must have come in contact with a mythic beast or creature.
The deities are known for having many children and several other distant brethren, some of which exist on the earth, roaming around as Buddhist guardians, such as the regal Dapengs, or man-eating snake monsters, the most infamous being the nine-headed Jiuying that terrorized seafarers for decades until Mydei slayed it. In this case, an immediate possibility was the return of the boar demon Feng Xi who often wreaked havoc upon farmlands. Feng Xi was also subdued by your husband a few years ago, but it would be no surprise if it were to appear again, typical of the inexplicable nature of divine beasts. But upon investigations of the ruined farmlands by their respective prefectural ministers, there were no signs of terrifying waste or death, only the usual symptoms of a long-lasting drought and ashy remains from fires caused by unrelenting dry winds. With further consideration, you also know that it is impossible, from personal observations and experiences, to invoke a heavenly force powerful – brutal – enough to cause a disaster of this magnitude. In other words, by process of elimination, the problem has to either be the direct doing of a human blessed with divinity or, even worse, a creature or deity from Tian themselves. 
You can only hope it is not the latter.
Your concern must be showing on your face, as Mydei leans over to rub his thumb firmly against the apple of your cheek.
No more. Come back to me.
You nod, knowing when to be obedient. When Mydei speaks to you in this tone, sympathetic yet earnest, you know he is looking out for you, grounding you before you can fully lose yourself. While you have impressive mental strength and foresight, you lack an attachment to the present, and without supervision, there is a very real risk of you drifting far, far away, disappearing as you once did when you were young.
Your husband takes you by the hand and guides you back to your shared bedroom. The brief walk is silent, save for your footsteps and the occasional greeting from a guard. The two of you part momentarily when you enter the chamber, as Mydei heads to the side to open the window screens to allow streams of moonlight into the room, while you take your seat on the center of the bed. It is not cold even as a slight breeze filters into the room, for his robe still shields your back and shoulders. However, you elect to take it off, and Mydei watches you strip, not just his clothing but also your layers underneath, from where he is standing.
The moon always manages to cast a romantic light on all that it befalls, and through the midst of your moans, his pants, and the joining of your bodies, over and over and over again, it generously extends its rays so that the two of you are able to have a clear view of each other in your otherwise pitch black room. Surprisingly, there is also a warmth to the moonlight, a soothing and comforting quality to it, that makes you feel as if time is passing slower than it actually is. In this prolonged moment, you can pinpoint every single movement and sensation between you and Mydei – his steeled grip around the base of your neck as he presses you tightly against his chest, the curling of your toes with every deep thrust, the crescendo of his heartbeat against yours. In this room, there is only you and him, isolated and ignorant to the rest of the world – the universe, even –, and defying all rules of space and physics, you solely focus on extending the present for as long as you can, while Mydei struggles to convey to you just how deeply obsessed and enamored he is with you. No one can intervene in this proud, unabashed act of intimacy, and if either you or Mydei dared, both of you would even describe your shared bond as sacred. And, especially for you, you know to not use that word so carelessly.
And when Mydei lays you down to peel off your legs and instead press them down, as close to your ears as possible, he goes impossibly harder and deeper. In this space, there are only the two of you, though you are only seeing him, and he is only seeing you. There are no thoughts or even carnal desires, just a fundamental appreciation and unconditional loving for the other. You whimper – my love – as he presses his sweat-stricken forehead against yours, and he responds with a passionate roll of his hips and a scathing bite that draws blood at your left shoulder. With your arms wrapped around his head, you keep him there and leave him with no choice but to continue making love to you until you unravel at your climax with your teeth clenching, thighs shaking, mind spinning, soul soaring. Mydei soon follows, piercing his nails into your hips to mark you on the outside, releasing within you to mark you on the inside, and between labored rasps of your name, he smears his lips and tongue over yours in hopes of memorizing your addictive taste, your delighted sounds, and your passionate touch.
The two of you stay intertwined, even when neither of you are reeling from the impact of your highs. To part would be to abandon this private realm, which would mean returning to your normal tendencies of hesitance and restraint, and even though all of this will repeat once again tomorrow, you lack the patience to wait, still imprisoned in the moon’s warped, elongated trajectories of time and space.
Despite your defiance, the two of you fall asleep, consumed by wariness and longing, and another day of your life passes.
The Emperor has ten sons and countless more daughters. Today marks the seventeenth birthday of the fourth prince, and as expected, it is a grand event. Earlier, at the celebration’s reception, there were hundreds of dancers in neat rows, all flicking their sleeves and arching their fingertips to the rhythm of the Capital’s grand orchestra, also perfectly organized and harmonious as a whole. Following the conclusion of the performance, guards, servants, and lower-ranking officials dash back and forth and around the expanse of the Palace to ensure the undeterred progression of the fourth prince’s birthday party, while higher-ranking officials and generals, along with their accompanying guests, mill about before filing to their respective seats along the two columns of tables laid out parallel to the walls of the central courtyard. In the center front, there is a raised stage with a constructed overhang large enough to accommodate the Emperor, the Empress Dowager, and all ten sons. The platform and steps are entirely covered by a luxurious red carpet with golden floral patterns, and from Mydei’s seat, you can marvel at the delicate porcelain dishware set on top of masterfully carved wooden countertops. You are not used to such lavish displays of wealth and luxury because, although Mydei has long been one of the Emperor’s most loyal and trustworthy generals, that does not necessarily mean you are invited to visit the Palace often. Therefore, as the two of you wait for the birthday ceremony to officially begin, you try to sit as still as possible in order to marvel and take in your surroundings.
During this period, many governmental and bureaucratic figures visit your and Mydei’s seat to say their greetings and make elucidating small talk. Despite assuming his role as one of the Holy Nation’s protectors, your husband cannot abandon certain pet peeves of his, and he shuts down all but one of these conversations with dry responses that reveal nothing of his thoughts or opinions. The only official that he properly responds to is the Head of the Security Bureau, a man by the name of Phainon. From past dinner conversations, you remember Mydei mentioning this man but with the questionable nickname “Deliverer” instead. It was in reference to Phainon’s previous position under the Central Secretariat, though the reason behind his transfer to the Security Bureau continues to remain a secret even to your husband. Regardless, it is obvious that Mydei only tolerates this man at best, so you make sure to listen intently to their conversation.
Mydei! Rare to see you so festive!
It is Mydeimos for you, Deliverer.
Ha, yes, of course.
What is the Security Bureau doing here? What happened to keeping a low profile?
No worries, it is only me, and almost everyone here still believes I remain under the Secretariat. I am also here because I have news to share with you.
Hurry, then.
Phainon does not, though. He hums and begins to look around the courtyard. For a moment, you sense his gaze, but it does not linger for more than a full second. With a shake of his head, your husband sighs and takes deep gulps of water to keep himself preoccupied until the Security Head finally carries on.
He will want to speak to you, when it is your turn to congratulate the prince.
Regarding what?
But Phainon shrugs, and this time, there is no hint of evasion or distance. He truly does not know. But he does leave Mydei with one last piece of instruction.
You will be last in line.
After a few more teasing remarks, Phainon bids the two of you farewell, and from your periphery, you watch him disappear from the south gate.
Before dinner, all of the officials present are to line up in terms of rank and nobility, and, one by one, greet the Emperor, Empress Dowager, and the princes, as well as present their gifts. As per military customs, Mydei requested a new sword sheath of untarnished gold be made for the fourth prince, to represent unwavering courage and honorable victory, so that shall be your offering. However, these interactions usually do not last for more than a few minutes, the last ones usually even more rushed, to ensure that everyone gets their turn and are not too irritated by mealtime, so you wonder how exactly the Emperor will relay his message. Furthermore, you find it suspicious that Phainon requested your husband, one of the generals under direct supervision of the Emperor, to place himself last.
Alas, you find yourself in another situation where you cannot draw sound conclusions. But now that Phainon has left and no other officials have the gall to approach Mydei, you can actually enjoy the ongoing celebrations with your husband.
You fill his tea cup and then yours, though you take a sip first. When you look up at him, he nods in affirmation before drinking himself. The walls, you notice, are a rustic red-brown, though much of it has been covered up by the willows and persimmon trees that were moved specifically for tonight’s event. Scattered between the trunks of the trees are gathered shrubs of all kinds, from batches of orange peonies to short stalks of bamboo to clusters of purple asters. You wonder if you could bring back a few roots or seeds with you, but with one sharp glance from Mydei, you discard the idea immediately.
Your husband knows that you are bored, though, so he offers some reprieve.
There are rumors that the fourth prince might not even make it to his own birthday party.
I am not surprised. I have heard the Emperor’s sons are quite rowdy.
I believe Phainon is here to ensure that all of the princes arrive on time and participate through its entirety. I must say, it is quite entertaining to see him chase after a few brats.
Mydei.
Do not worry. The Emperor is understanding. Besides, I am sure he wholeheartedly agrees at the current moment.
Oh?
Mydei raises his chin, staring up at the night sky. It is hard to make out any one star due to the outstanding numbers of torches, lamps, and fires distributed around the courtyard, but it is not like Mydei was looking at the stars in the first place. The two of you are different in this way. You often seek the world when you think, looking outwards for celestial signs, while Mydei often becomes more introspective with his musings. Even when it looks like he is searching for something, he most likely is not, as he believes all of the answers he needs are usually, perhaps with some effort required, within one’s grasp.
Phainon has aided our investigations of the Palace. He is confident that the culprit is not to be found here.
Your fist digs into the sleeves of your gown.
There are not even signs of collusion?
You know the deities would never stoop to that level. They do not need the help of mortal intelligence or treachery. Regardless, the Emperor has been made aware of the situation, and is quite preoccupied with it. His sons’ constant running about and lack of any sort of drive or initiative is certainly not doing him any good either.
Pursing your lips, you glance at your husband, only to find him already staring at you.
Fear not, my wife. I have slain products of the divine before.
His eyes seem to glow with fierce intensity. The red and orange streaks in his eyes are more noticeable, not because of the myriad torches surrounding your table, but rather because his eyes are widening out of enthusiasm. You scowl, disapproving of his evident bloodthirstiness, yet despite your opposing morals, you slip a hand into his hold. By instinct, he begins to press at the pads of your fingertips, while rubbing circles into your palm. If it were any other day, any other moment, his physical affection would soothe and reassure you. Unfortunately, as Mydei has just confirmed the worst of your suspicions, the fear taking root in the pit of your stomach has already begun to sprout and overwhelm the rest of your emotions.
Surely there is no need to jump into a fight.
Huh, you propose a negotiation? Our deities already know what the consequences of their actions are – they do not care to change their ways, even with such knowledge. What makes you think their minds are still susceptible to reconsideration?
Perhaps some of them do care.
Your husband snorts. To be honest, he is a little surprised by your response. Neither of you are particularly devout, and throughout his many years of knowing you at this point, he knows you are not fond of the divine. So for you to defend them, to the extent of betting on their fickle and spare goodwill, is unusual.
It is not up to me, my wife. I act based on what the Emperor asks of me.
Something in you – a gut instinct, a trained intuition – tells you that you will find out the Emperor’s decision by tonight.
After another half hour, composed of more light-hearted conversation and small bites of snacks to whet your appetite, a gong finally sounds, its ringing reverberating throughout the entirety of the Palace. You feel your bones quake with each vibration, and only after its last echoes have died off does your body regain stillness. The Emperor’s secretary makes his way to the center of the stage, and with a deep bow, commands everyone to rise for the Imperial Family. Everyone stands and bows, faces parallel to the floor, until all members of the Imperial Family settle into their seats, which the secretary confirms several minutes later. Afterwards, you all line up.
Other officials have curious looks on their faces as they see you and Mydei turn away from the stage. One even asks where the two of you are headed, wondering if you have lost your minds and are intent on abandoning the ceremony, but neither of you respond and continue toward the back of the line. 
You and Mydei do not speak for the entire hour that it takes for your turn to come. The whole time, nervous and intimidated stares are directed your way, but both of you could care less, simply standing side by side, close enough for your sleeves to brush against and overlap each other.
When the rest of the officials have returned to their seats, only you and Mydei remain, standing a few feet away from the steps that lead up to the raised platform. With a nod from the secretary, Mydei leads you forward, always a step ahead, and when the two of you stand level with the Imperial Family, you get on your knees and raise your clasped hands in front of your dipped heads.
Good evening, your Highnesses. Congratulations to the Fourth Prince, for reaching his seventeenth birthday. We hope the prince continues to live a prosperous, fortunate, and long life, and I present this sword sheath, a product of the finest metals and months’ worth of labor, a tool that we hope he will use as he prepares to lead this Holy Nation. We pay our deepest respects to the Imperial Family.
An attendant takes the sheath from Mydei’s outstretched arms. Usually, one would be dismissed shortly after presenting their gift, but the secretary has yet to tell either of you to rise. Instead, you hear the sound of a chair’s legs rubbing against the carpet’s fur, along with padded footsteps that stop right in front of your husband.
General Mydeimos, you have done incredibly in serving me, and ultimately, this Holy Nation. Your loyalty is not to be questioned.
You recognize this voice. It is jaded yet firm, gentle but irrefutable. The Emperor is telling you his decision.
I want to make an announcement to all that are present, to heed my intent and my resolve. This Holy Nation has coexisted with and lived under the guidance of Tian, but it has not always been a harmonious or even peaceful endeavor. As Emperor, it is my sworn duty, an oath I have undertaken since the day of my inauguration, to protect my people, including all of you, and I can promise you that, throughout these many years under my rule, Tian and I are connected and that I have been in constant search to make a more serene coexistence – a symbiosis, if you will – possible. However –
It seems the Palace and everything within it unanimously sucks in a quavering breath.
– it has become apparent that the heavens have no interest in granting us such serenity. Of course, by no means is this speech of mine a declaration of war or defiance. Rather, I believe this burden I am about to share with you is, in fact, a challenge for this Holy Nation, and one that will be undertaken by a representative of my choosing: Mydeimos. General Mydeimos, please rise.
As much as you would love to raise your head and stare at Mydei like everyone else, you have not been granted permission to lift your head, so you can only continue to heed the Emperor’s message carefully, trying to discern any subtle implications while continuing to pay attention to the words that follow.
For the many years that he has served me, General Mydeimos has become a pillar in the Holy Nation’s defenses. He has slain many of Tian’s earthbound descendants, protecting this land from the destruction of loose spirits and evil demons. Under his watchful gaze, he had confirmed the prophetic fragments I was receiving from Tian, that it is part of this Holy Nation’s fate that we are to face our doom if we remain motionless and ignorant. My people, hear me now, and listen to me carefully, as this message of mine is not meant to inflict any unnecessary fear or anxiety. However, the heavens have told me, as I am telling you, that if nothing is done, the entire world will be burned to its core by the manifestation of ten suns. No human, no animal, no plant will survive the onslaught of ten more suns, no ocean or lake or sea can withstand the fire of ten more suns, not even Tian’s earthbound descendants will be spared.
For this most inauspicious prophecy, I must apologize, on behalf of my ten sons, for their continuous mischief and negligence have been deemed the cause of this impending tragedy. Indeed, Tian has whispered as such in my mind. This Holy Nation deeply understands the various attitudes our deities have towards humans. Some are indifferent, some are intensely curious. It seems this impending tragedy has come about from the latter. My ten sons, this Holy Nation’s royal princes, have inspired the same mischief and negligence in ten of Yudi’s sons. They aspire to experience the same carefree play that my sons have gone away with – escaping the Palace, tricking the innocent to satisfy their personal greed, disappearing for extended periods of time. This behavior has never been acceptable in the Imperial Family, yet despite our fervent attempts to curb their behaviors, Yudi’s sons have already seen enough. 
There is now more than one sun in the sky, there is no mistake to that. We will continue to see more and more suns appear, and by the tenth, we will all perish. We must not cast doubt on this matter anymore, because the severity of this issue is life-threatening.
But, again, need I remind all that are present that I do not wish to embed an unjustified sense of fear or anxiety in any of you. The reason I have called upon all of you is because I would like all that are present to bear witness to this heavenly oath that General Mydeimos will take.
You cannot help but gasp, a sharp, harsh intake of breath that almost causes you to sputter and cough. But, even when the world feels like it is falling down on you, you manage to bear the pain, and you stifle it with tears gathering in your burning eyes.
General Mydeimos, there is no end to your remarkable feats in the military, and we are grateful for all that you have done. However, this ask of mine is one of a difficulty I can promise you have never faced before, and you must know, it could be the last task you ever undertake. Knowing all of the risks, I still ask you to take the following oath: I, General Mydeimos, under the watchful eye of the people of this Holy Nation, the Emperor, and all of Tian who are interested, I pledge to take down all but one of the suns, even at the cost of my own life.
It feels impossible to breathe. It seems, no matter how you try to escape, how far you run away, or where you disappear to, the divine will always catch up to you, pulling you away from your loved ones, and the other way around. Hot streams of tears pour down your cheeks, and the only way to prevent yourself from making any noise is to bite down on your lower lip, until your jaws are locking and your teeth are piercing through the thin flesh. Your clasped hands shudder violently, not only from the exhaustion of holding them up for so long, but also from how tightly they are gripping onto each other. Your knuckles are without a doubt strained, and your fingernails are digging into the backs of your hands. Your ears ring with deafening silence, while straining to hear Mydei’s response, yet you also do not want to listen, fearful because you know that, even if he had a choice, he would always agree to a brutal fight.
Without a beat of hesitation, your husband, chief of your village, a general of this Holy Nation, speaks.
I, General Mydeimos, under the watchful eye of the people of this Holy Nation, the Emperor, and all of Tian who are interested, I pledge to take down all but one of the suns, even at the cost of my own life.
Despite the crescendo of applause, the drums, the gong, you hear nothing. You are not sure how it is that you manage to bow to the Emperor, make your way down from the stage, and return to your seat alongside Mydei’s, but to be honest, you do not care how you did any of those things. All you can think about is that, once again, your loved one is being separated from you, all because of the heavens and the divine, and even if his hand is clutching onto yours at this moment, so tight that you can no longer feel the tips of your fingers or the center of your palm, he has never felt farther away.
There is no more of your routine with Mydei. He is taken away at the end of the birthday party to begin making preparations for his conquest, leaving you to return to the village alone. He does not visit, can only make time to send concise messages, but he does promise you that he will return the night before he is scheduled to leave.
This is not Mydei’s first conquest, but it is his first conquest that you are dreading, to say the least. It is difficult to encapsulate the extent of your mental anguish because the resurfacing of past traumas, of memories you are insistent on forgetting, is a dark, murky sensation. It is asphyxiating, but you do not know that you are being choked until it is too late, past the point of return. You are no different from a sleeping mouse in the coiled chokehold of a starving snake, and there is nothing to save you, not even to witness your death. Part of you knows this is a globalization of an internal anxiety, as Mydei has not been slain. He is well and alive presently, but that does not answer your deepest concern: will he survive? Even if you sought out divine signals as you had once routinely done over a decade ago, you have been taught that it is taboo to seek the fate of an individual. Fate can be consulted for villages, the weather, long-term wealth, but to determine the death of somebody, even an important figure, is strongly discouraged as there is no use in disturbing one’s mind over a matter that has been set in stone since the birth of this universe.
Not that any of that is relevant. You are sure the divine, even the weakest of Tian’s spirits, would not heed your call, would pay no mind to a trivial woman that had, a long time ago, abandoned her position as a high priestess, and in turn, her prolific ability to invoke divinity. Had you remained at the convent and grown into your role as high priestess, perhaps only then would they give you a fraction of their time, but then, in that case, you would not be praying for Mydei’s safety, but rather for the protection of this Holy Nation as a whole.
There is no particular reason for why you have hidden your past from Mydei or the villagers, other than to save face. After all, no one would believe in the loyalty or commitment of a traitor. Regardless, now that there is established trust, you staunchly believe there is no need to share distasteful matters, like your pathetic past. At this moment, everyone should prioritize Mydei, as well as ensuring the operations of the village during his absence.
Mydei finds you not in the dining room, but in his office at his desk, with a candelabra burning away, as if you are prepared to work the whole night. You are combing through a few scrolls that were once shelved, the old texts he used to pore over when he was training to become village chief. It is not that you are a stranger to their contents or to the duties of the village chief. It is simply that, when you are uneasy, you tend to return to the very basics, to instill confidence within yourself that there is a logical rationale behind your actions and decisions. He knocks on the office doors and watches through the parted screen window as you scramble up from your seat from surprise. He chuckles, but had there been any listeners, they would know those were half-hearted at best.
We need to talk.
It is comforting, though, that there remain some things that will never change. Even if you are not honest, Mydei will always face you with a straightforward attitude, and compared to before, he feels more present, confirming that he is, in fact, standing in front of you, when he loops your arm through his. You let him guide you away from the office and to your shared bedroom, where you can, for the last time in a while, immerse yourselves in this space dedicated only to the two of you.
On the bed, he pulls you into a tight, engulfing embrace. With his chest molded against your arched back, his legs spread out to barricade your form, his chin atop your left shoulder where the bite mark once was, the two of you parse through all and any matters.
There will be a caravan arriving in a month’s time.
The north west gate needs to be rebuilt.
We should consider extending trade to some of the towns in the south.
You will miss it when the peaches are in season.
Be sure to visit Grandma Li. She tends to forget to take her medication.
Do not forget to rest your arm. Feng Meng will not take it easy on you, even if you are his general and him your soldier. You will always be his master first.
When you need me, look up at the moon, because I will also be gazing at it. Never forget that we are forever under the same sky.
The moonlight is especially consoling that night. Unlike his usual tendencies to dominate and overwhelm, your husband lets you set the pace, and atop him, he watches you surge up and down, the moon’s beams illuminating your damp skin, your parted lips, and your glossed eyes. Your breasts, hips, thighs ripple with every unforgiving drop of your body onto his, and his cock pierces you deeply in turn, reaching and hitting spots that cause you to see stars. He never fails to make you feel fulfilled, but tonight, you are voracious, and you just want more, more, more of him. You want to embed pieces of yourself into his body, so that throughout his campaign, no matter how long it lasts, he will never once waver when he thinks back to your touch, your scent, your love. As you continue riding him, you run your hands over his sturdy form, letting your fingers trace the divots of his muscles, the fat of his chest, the red streaks of tattoo that paint his arms. It is also so that you will never forget, drawing an illustrative map of his body so that in your times of loneliness, anxiety, and want, you also have something of his to depend upon. Perhaps you have forgotten how to live without your husband, but that is a subject for introspection later. In the present, you decide to accelerate your movements and apply more force with every exerted rise and fall.
Eventually, you collapse forward because by no means do you have as much stamina as your husband, but you urge yourself to push forward nonetheless and resort to more shallow lifts and dramatic swirls of your hips. With your face buried against the underside of his chin, you begin to mouth at his neck and Adam’s apple, the rumble of his groans and hisses traveling and vibrating straight through the thin skin of your lips. When it looks like your husband’s exhibiting a significant amount of restraint, with the way his head keeps shaking side to side and his hands grip onto your thighs with shackling strength, you cannot help but smirk, ready to give him his release that he is so desperately delaying. You litter a line of kisses down to his collarbones, and after a few laves of your tongue, as if to smooth and placate him, you bite down, sinking your teeth into the juncture where his neck and shoulders meet, clamping down so hard with the intent to punish, to instill guilt, to kill his fighting spirit.
Normally, you would never do such a thing. You have no interest in tying your partner down or forcing them to sacrifice the people and things they love and enjoy. But since he has granted you so much selfishness already, you might as well go the full way and make him really understand the state he has put you in. For, even upon reflection, you know it in your bare, raw soul that you will never know life without your husband. Where he goes, you follow. If he is alive, you will be, too. But if he were to die, then your time will also have come.
Your husband cries out loud with a wild shout of your name, arms flying to enclose themselves around your figure out of both surprise and overstimulation, and with a spontaneous jerk of his hip upwards, his cock collides with your core and slams into that spot, the one that always has you ripping apart at the seams and screaming for mercy, pulling you up to your euphoric high with him. Ironically, it feels as if you are falling from Tian, soaring through the sky while being unable to breathe, a coursing pleasure followed by a stinging, bittersweet pang. You do not even realize you are sobbing until your husband muffles your wails with his mouth, swallowing your grief and despair down with his own fears, of which he definitely has but will never voice.
Mydei is not used to seeing you so sentimental. You are more aloof and reserved, so he is not as practiced with handling your outbursts as he should be. But even he knows that this torrential surging of your emotions is really a broken heart personified. You need him to know that your heart is being torn and cracked and smashed by the inevitable reality of his leave, and he knows you are telling him that only he can fix you by coming back in one piece and with a sound mind.
For the remainder of the night, he holds you impossibly closer, one hand always keeping your face to his chest, the other always wound around your waist, his legs always tangled with yours. And before he falls asleep, he looks out the window, gazing up at a sliver of the starry sky, and prays to the moon to cast its gentle, assuring light upon you every dusk he is gone. Despite his personal gripes with the divine, he is convinced that, with the way it has never failed to make you look so mesmerizing and delicate underneath its glow, the moon will continue to bask you with its nurture and protection for as long as it takes for him to return, and he is soothed by that thought, because someone needs to look out for you in his absence.
By the early dawn, he is ready to leave. The two of you stand at the entrance to your abode, and with a chaste kiss to your forehead, he finally parts from you, distancing himself in slow motion. You watch, rooted to your spot, as he gets on his horse, relishes in one last longing gaze, and sets off. He rides away without looking back, and when he is out of sight, you, too, return to your bedroom without even the faintest sign of indecision or doubt.
Mydei returns not the following summer, but the summer after, right when the peach blossoms have begun shedding to make way for the green buds that will, in two to three weeks’ time, fruit. There is no fanfare or parade, not even an announcement to notify you of his arrival. In fact, for the little over two years since his departure, you were not informed of any aspect of his campaign from official channels. It did not matter, though, when everyone was able to keep track of his progress with every morning that passed.
Barely a month after his leave, you woke up with sweat soaking through your clothes and blankets, as if you had remained in a bath with your clothes on for several hours. You made it a habit to leave your windows open every night, but had you woken up that morning any later, you would have been sunburnt to the point of permanent scarring from the three suns that were just beginning to rise in the sky, their unrelenting heat scorching everything that happened to soak in its light. You got up and warned everyone in the household to remain indoors, and perilously, you took not one, but two, thickly lined parasols with you as you made your way through the village to issue warnings and usher those that were outside back into their homes. The flowers that you had tended to just the other afternoon were already wilting, dehydrated, and you goaded the rabbits from their hole with a trail of fruits and leaves to another you had haphazardly dug where there was everlasting shade.
Later on, you would hear that Mydei had first tried to negotiate with Yudi’s sons, telling them to fulfill their appetite for mischief with something else, but given the inconsistencies in the rumors, it is not clear whether the sons ignored or denied the general’s demands. It seems that Mydei’s attempt at swaying their minds only further encouraged them to follow through with their plan, and Yudi’s sons began to wreak havoc shortly afterwards. As a result, it became a hunt, one that required Mydei and his troop to race around the Holy Nation in search of each of Yudi’s kin. Mydei and his men could only attack at night, when the sons had left their daytime posts to make way for the moon, but they never came down together, instead settling in different parts of the Holy Nation.  
The information you managed to garner, in the form of riveting tales and dubiously trustworthy gossip, either came from the village children’s eavesdropping or the occasional letter from Phainon, which he sent under personal regards. There never was an explanation for why you were kept in the dark, and you never bothered to ask either, because what good would it do for you? Had your husband been slain, you and everyone else in the world would have known already, and you need not entertain excessive hope. All you had to do was see if you could wake to another day.
The worst occurred a year and a half into Mydei’s journey, when there were six suns in the sky at once, their brightness bleeding out even the pure blue of the space beyond. Everybody stayed indoors and covered every possible crack or opening to prevent sunlight from leaking in, but not without the cost of broiling within their own rooms. On days when it was more possible to venture outside, you and your guards had to visit the occasional house to pull out dead bodies, smelling of decaying rot, feces, and steam, and bury them before even their right to a dignified burial was stolen by Yudi’s kin. And this was not a problem exclusive to your village. The Palace began to ring a large gong, three resonating beats, at noon every day to honor the growing number of victims, and there was a national decree for every home to light incense and perform daily prayers during the early evenings to beg for Tian’s interference.
Of course, nobody from Tian ever responded, but it seemed as if Mydei had sensed his people’s tortured cries, and from that point onwards, the suns continue to be felled, one after the other, until only one remained, the same sun that has stood with the earth since the very beginning.
You are in his office when your head lady-in-waiting calls out your title with excited raps against the paneled doors.
My Lady! You must come! Someone has come for you!
You are on your feet immediately, and you almost knock her over when you burst through the doors.
However, you are not greeted by your husband. Rather, it is another familiar face that greets you with a toothy grin and a proud hand saluted at his head.
We have made it back, safe and sound!
You cannot help but throw your arms around the man’s neck, hugging him without reprieve for air. His arms do not reciprocate, for it is inappropriate for a man to demonstrate affection towards a taken woman, but by his hearty laughs, you know he is overjoyed by your reaction.
Where is your master, Feng Meng?
In the Capital, reporting to the Emperor. I have come to fetch you, Madam, to attend his ceremony! You must hurry!
Without another thought, you and your servants rush to dress you. There are flurries of orange sashes, twirling skirts with golden beads sewn at the waist, the clicking of green jade against white jade, and in no later than ten minutes, you are in an oxcart that speeds its way to the Palace.
It is extremely difficult to get to the Palace. First, all entrances to the Capital are at a standstill, bottlenecked by a flood of traffic composed of several donkeys, horses, and merchant carts. The inside of the Capital fares no better – in fact, made worse by all of the pedestrians, street-side shops, and narrow paths. It is only after your cart finally pushes its way through the long lines and leaves the more populated and mercantile neighborhoods that the traffic disperses, and then it is an orderly journey to the Palace. When the guards ask for the purpose of your visit, Feng Meng simply needs to flash the handle of his sword, and you are directed to enter through the back gates, typically only reserved for guests of honor.
You swallow thickly from the infinite, various thoughts swirling in your mind. Will he have scars etching every corner of his body? Will he be several shades tanner? Is his hair an unruly length, or has he cut, or worse, singed it short? Is he a changed person, more violent in demeanor or fatigued from excessive stress? You do not plan on bombarding him with your questions, as he is probably answering plenty from government officials and the Emperor himself, but you also cannot guarantee that you will be able to restrain yourself. Though, the more you think about it, you are not sure how you should react when you see him. Should you wait for him to approach you, or should you take the initiative? Will he want to embrace you or keep you at a distance to give himself some space? How different is he from the man he was more than two years ago, and what will this current version of Mydei think of you when he sees you?
You fail to devise a plan by the time your cart comes to a stop and Feng Meng holds his elbow out to help you jump down. The Palace guards instruct you to wait with the other soldiers' wives, mothers, and fathers in the tea room around the corner, and Feng Meng directs you before he has to leave to prepare for the ceremony himself. You are unsure if Mydei will come to you as you wait in the tea room, so in the case that he does, you find a chair closest to the open entrance, and sit in perfect posture, still and quiet. The other people in the room are frantic, sharing the same questions and concerns you have, but requiring and taking advantage of the comfort of family to alleviate each other’s doubts and fears. You are reminded that neither you or Mydei have other family to turn to, only each other, and oddly enough, you become more optimistic.
All of you are in the tea room for two hours before a Palace guard comes to beckon the entire gathering to follow him. The guard guides all of you to your seats, near the back of the same courtyard you were in for the fourth prince’s seventeenth birthday party. This time, instead of two columns of tables, there are rows upon rows of people kneeling shoulder to shoulder, facing in the direction of the raised center stage. As per usual, the Imperial Family has yet to make their appearance, but they soon will after the highest-ranking officials finish taking their seats.
Finally, with the blaring sound of horns and gongs and drums, the award ceremony begins, and the Emperor, Empress Dowager, and the ten princes ascend their thrones. The secretary comes at the end of the line, and with a nod from the Emperor, the former begins his speech.
Today marks the official end of General Mydeimos’ campaign to defeat ten of Yudi’s sons. General Mydeimos and his men have returned victorious, and so, we host today’s ceremony in tribute to their bravery and success.
The crowd breaks into a clamoring of applause, a little more unruly due to the ecstatic and celebratory atmosphere.
We will present General Mydeimos and his troop of 62 surviving soldiers with honorable military status, in addition to multiple monetary benefits. We will also mourn the loss of the 138 soldiers, whose lives were lost throughout the campaign’s duration, with a funeral procession that will take place the following Saturday and Sunday. Families of the deceased will receive imperial support, and on behalf of this Holy Nation, we are indebted to the sacrifices you and your sons have made. More information regarding the funeral and compensation will be announced and distributed in the coming days. With that, we will begin by awarding the 62 soldiers.
A line of soldiers marches forth from behind you, and you closely observe them as they trod past you. Their faces are set and stern, and they are wearing their tattered armor, rusted and melted swords, bows, and spears held in place on their backs. You also notice several holding onto the solder in front of them, and with a closer look, you realize many of them have either a diminished or total loss of sight. As the line reaches the steps to the stage, the secretary begins calling out each name, handing every person when it is their turn a bronze badge with an engraved solar insignia and a hefty bag of riches. There is no applause, as silence is a way of demonstrating utmost attention and respect, until all the soldiers have been named and awarded. The survivors line up once again and seat themselves along the walls of the courtyard.
Then, an obedient hush falls across the crowd, all in anticipation of the true hero. You, too, suck in your breath, eyes darting around in search of your husband, the chief of your village, a general of this Holy Nation. With a deep breath, the secretary announces his presence in a booming, grand voice.
General Mydeimos, please enter!
Your abilities to speak, breathe, even think are stolen from you. It does not feel like reality when you see Mydei, his hair tied in a clean knot on the top of his head, a velvety black cape billowing behind his broad, intimidating figure, the metal blade of his glaive glinting fiercely underneath the rays of the single sun in the sky. Mydei spares nothing to the crowd, not a prideful smirk or disinterested glance, and simply kneels deeply when he makes his way in front of the Imperial Family.
The Emperor rises from his seat, and the secretary is prompted to narrate.
General Mydeimos, the Emperor would like to personally bestow you your rewards, for your incomparable feat in defeating Yudi’s sons, ten of Tian’s mightiest creations. On behalf of the Imperial Family, he would like to award you a ranking within the nobility and an accompanying northern estate in the Capital. Furthermore, your village will receive recovery aid from the government and many trade benefits. Thank you, once again, for your service.
The Emperor gestures for Mydei to stand, and attaches a noble badge onto the latter’s cloak. Mydei then turns around and bows to the crowd.
General Mydeimos, would you like to say anything, in light of your return and victorious conquest?
He sweeps his eyes across the hundreds of people in front of him before lifting his head and glaring up at the clear blue sky.
My men and I have returned, and the Holy Nation is safe. We are safe, and undefeated.
Through the thundering of applause, cheers, and cries, you tear up at the glorious sight of your husband. He is far away, not as far as he was these past two years, but still a fair distance away such that you cannot make out the features of his face. How blessed it is to live in the same world as him, you think, and it seems your undivided admiration of your husband causes you to accidentally rid yourself of your presence. Mydei’s head snaps to look in your direction, having sensed a change within the audience. He cannot see you individually, but he knows you are somewhere amongst that section of the crowd, and he nods his head, dipping his chin with solemn confidence. Then, he begins to make his way down the steps to take his leave.
That is, until a shiver runs down his spine, a gut instinct alerting him of a formidable presence, and he swivels around to look behind him as his hands reach for his glaive, only to be blinded by a shining white light. What is even more concerning is, as he tries to block the light from his view, he notices that there is no reaction from anyone else present – in fact, there is no sound at all. The light begins to retract on its own, and as Mydei blinks through his stunned vision, he sees that the secretary, the guards lining the bottom of the stairs, the officials sitting in the front rows of the audience – all of them are frozen in place, mouths open in mid-conversation, hands stuck beside their heads in dramatic gestures, eyes wide open, unblinking. The scenery has not changed one bit, aside from the fact that everyone and everything is unmoving, yet he can still sense the formidable presence surrounding him.
Oh, I thought it was just you and me.
A voice, coming from everywhere and nowhere, speaks. Suddenly, a familiar voice – your shout – pierces through the silent space.
Mydei!
He turns to where he once looked in the crowd and spots your standing figure. But before he can sprint to you, or call you over, the voice speaks again.
Forgive me, I do not mean to scare either of you. I had only intended to speak to Mydeimos, however.
With that, your body slumps over and drops onto the ground. Without hesitation, Mydei swings his glaive and, with a snarl, holds it out in front of himself, body poised to attack.
What did you do to my wife!
You cannot fight me, for I will not appear in front of you. As for your wife, I have put her to sleep. I only wish to speak to you.
Concerning what matter?
But the voice does not speak again, and instead, his glaive is replaced, and a ball appears in one hand.
What is this! Answer me!
An elixir of immortality, made of a blade of grass found only in Tian. If you ingest this elixir, it will grant you endless life, and you will become one of us. Take this as a sign of my gratitude.
Before he can respond, there is another flash of that same blinding white light from earlier, and the chaos of the courtyard returns, everything resuming their intended ways. Only the ball in his hand, the lack of his weapon, and your unconscious form indicate that his conversation actually took place.
Following the award ceremony, Mydei is invited to stay as a guest in the Palace, but he declines, not even trying to come up with a reason to justify his need to return to his village immediately.
He returns before you do but only needs to wait for half an hour before he hears you running through the walkways of your estate, approaching your chamber where he is waiting for you. Even though he had encountered Yudi’s sons, all ten of them combined would pale in the face of the omnipotent force that had approached him, and he is sure you are as, if not more, distraught as he is.
When you come rushing in, he rises from the bed and catches you as you leap at him, your trembling body against his.
My love, are you alright!
I need to show you this.
You refuse to separate from him, though, so he squeezes his hand into the crevice between your neck and his chest, and presses the elixir against your skin. That causes you to jump back, and your expression can only be described as one of pure shock.
That cannot be.
Mydei purses his lips.
The voice said it can grant immortality.
That - that voice. Only Yudi and Wang Mu Niang Niang possess access to the elixir of immortality. It - it must have been her! How can this be!
If it is Wang Mu Niang Niang, she said this was a gift out of gratitude.
He watches you take shaky steps back to him. You are trained on the ball in his palm, in disbelief of the existence of it.
W-well… are you going to take it?
Mydei snorts.
Of course not. I would be a fool to separate us from each other for any longer. I also have no intention of becoming a liar or a hypocrite, when I have had little regard for the divine since my birth. Have you forgotten what your husband is like?
His words, mostly tart with a hint of lilting tease, manages to draw a huff of a chuckle from you.
I am home. And I plan to stay for a while.
He scans your face and frame. There are more lines on your face, no doubt a result of your labor and sleepless nights from watching over the village by yourself. Your hair has also gotten quite thin and is a lighter shade, washed out by the suns’ harsh light, and there is both a rigidness and a frailty to your aura, both of which he has never sensed before. You, too, take your time in observing your husband, who has indeed gotten quite tan, and his hair is even longer, reaching down to his hips. There are several patches of his skin that are charred and burned, and you wince at the notion of such extreme pain and beating. Some things remain the same, however, such as the chiseled lines of his muscles and the bold red of his tattoos.
Moreover, this beat of hesitation, of holding each other at an arm’s length away, stays constant as well. But it does not last as long anymore, when Mydei breaks first and draws you into his hold. This embrace is one saturated with warmth, longing, and satisfaction, your first genuine hug since the two of you parted ways over two years ago. You take in his presence, as he does with yours, and in this room, this space just for the two of you, it finally feels complete and whole again.
Later, before the both of you head out for dinner with the rest of the villagers, Mydei decides to hide the elixir in a wooden box that he conceals in the corner of the bedroom. Though neither of you may have a need for it, it may be safer to conceal its existence, especially from potential prying eyes and envious minds.
A week later, a Palace messenger arrives at your estate to announce the holding of a banquet that evening in honor of Mydei and his troop. Your husband scoffs at the invitation, but with a stern glare from you, he begrudgingly accepts. These days, Mydei deigns to leave your side, constantly following you about as you resume your village duties and responsibilities. You also make time to bring him around to show him what he has missed out on.
One dawn, you take him to visit Grandma Li’s grave. You bring a basket of pears, homemade rice cakes filled with peanut butter, and incense pillars as offerings, and Mydei kneels for a long time in front of the grave. Another lunchtime, the two of you go to collect peaches, and as it was a Sunday, the children who had no school to attend that day joined you with their parents and siblings. You also show him the rabbits that you raised, the babies now fully grown with fluffy white coats and beady red eyes. And the night before the Palace’s banquet, your village hosts its own at your estate, and many of Mydei’s men come over. Mydei sits with his disciple Feng Meng, while you mill about to pay your respects to the village’s elders and to extend your appreciation to the soldiers present for their loyalty toward your husband.
You pass by a table occupied by a large family of seven. You are especially close to this family’s twins who are both ten-years-old, though not out of personal bias, but because they are relentless in their pursuit for your affection. As so, when the twins notice you, they scream out to you.
Eat with us! Eat with us!
You laugh, shaking your head with a soft smile.
Sorry, little ones, but I must eat with the chief tonight. I will join you for a meal another day.
They huff, crossing their plush arms across their chests. Then, as twins are with their shared thoughts and intuition, they share a cheerful look before turning back to you. The older of the two, a girl, speaks first, before the younger one, a boy, follows up, and the two continue to alternate back and forth.
We heard something interesting at school yesterday!
It is about the chief!
And we heard it from the ninth prince himself!
The prince said the chief had a forbidden medicine –
– a medicine that would make him young forever!
But we read in our books that that kind of medicine only exists in Tian.
Yet the prince looked awfully serious. Is there something wrong with the ninth prince?
Or is the prince right? That the elixir of immortality is real?
You pat their heads while maintaining your expression.
Lower your voices and hush now. If you are caught speaking ill of the Imperial Family, you will lose your tongues. Eat, before dinner gets cold.
You bid your farewell, and head back to your table. As you walk, though, you mull over the twins’ words.
As much as you despise your upbringing as a child of the divine, you find that the hard skills you learned since young have been more helpful than not throughout your life, even after you abandoned your post. Like now, you know not to ignore the signs. Twins are fortuitous, especially boy-girl pairs, and given that they brought up the elixir of all subjects tells you that Wang Mu Niang Niang’s gift is not something that can be so easily forgotten or discarded. You must exercise caution and remain vigilant, all while exhibiting inconspicuousness.
When you return to Mydei’s side, you realize Feng Meng is gone. You ask about the latter’s whereabouts, to which your husband responds that his disciple went to the bathroom. You run your hand through his hair, tracing your fingernail through his braids that you did this morning, before you excuse yourself to change into something warmer.
You pad through the darkened walkways, stopping whenever you run into a guard or a lady-in-waiting. You ask if they have seen Feng Meng, and you follow each of their instructions, until you realize you are navigating towards your husband’s office. Before you make the bend that would allow you to see the office, you wait, extinguishing your presence as you have done when tending to the rabbits and channeling your foresight. When your soul is quiet, everything around gets louder, and though it is faint, there is a vanishing trace of disdain that you can sense that stains the path to Mydei’s office. The flickering nature of the presence tells you there must be another human nearby, one skilled but not yet masterful. But before you can fetch Mydei for help, you must confirm your suspicions.
With quick and light steps, you glide to the old willow that drapes itself over the office building. From behind the trunk, you can peer inside one of the windows, though it does take some effort as it is only wedged open by a fraction and there is no light inside. From what you can tell, there are several unfurled scrolls strewn across his desk, and if you strain your ears, you can hear the shuffling and rearranging of the items on the shelves closest to you. While you do not know who this intruder is, as it could be someone other than Feng Meng, it is clear that someone is there.
You hurry back and try your best to keep up the silencing of your qi, despite the thrumming of anxiety that courses through your blood.
Mydei catches onto your intentions quickly, as he notices your appearance has not changed at all upon your return. You note that Feng Meng’s absence persists. He comes up to you, but instead of directing him to where the intruder is, you loop your arms through his and gently urge him to follow you around the villagers and soldiers. After all, you do not know if the intruder is acting alone, and if not, there could be those watching your husband closely.
As you pace around, you quietly inform him.
Someone is ransacking your office. I believe they are looking for the elixir.
How would they know about it?
Even the children have heard about it. At the very least, it is known that the ninth prince has been talking about its potential existence in the Capital.
How would the ninth prince know about it?
It is a good question, so you ponder it briefly.
I have a hypothesis, if you will entertain me.
Please, go ahead.
Remember how I was awake initially? It could be that the Imperial Family was also awake.
How could I have missed that?
No, not in the same way that you and I were awake. We could move about, even under Wang Mu Niang Niang’s spell. I was most likely able to withstand her spell because of my tolerance to divinity. By that logic, then, it is possible that the Imperial Family and priests were also able to retain their consciousness during her appearance, but were solely limited to that.
That is enough said on your part. The rest, Mydei understands. It is his turn, then, to formulate a strategy.
I will take the direct route to our bedroom. Veil yourself and go from the back, around the washroom. I will leave first, or else they will be suspicious of you.
He rubs his thumb across your cheek, a gesture of reassurance, and he makes some conversation with a few of the elders to his side before he goes on his way. You spend even longer lingering around the villagers, but also with the soldiers, to see if any of them are accomplices. But there is no sense of hostility or hatred from them. The more you investigate, hovering within the soldiers’ presence, the more confident you are that none of them are involved. That leaves you with two options: the intruder is acting alone, confirming their identity as Feng Meng, or alongside members of the Security Bureau.
You sigh. You must go now.
Mydei is broiling with anger. There is no need to hide his presence, as he wants to make it known that he is furious. His people have long suffered at the hands of the current empire, the village having been conquered during his incompetent father’s reign, and while he has tried to make peace with the Emperor, he has never once forgiven him and the Holy Nation. Now, he is being targeted for something he did not ask for – if they wanted it, they could have just asked for it! He shakes his head and rolls out his wrists, preparing to draw his blade and kill all that invades his home.
You are too reckless, Mydei.
Mydei swings, but misses.
Deliverer!
The Head of the Security Bureau steps out of the shadow, a black mask covering all but his piercing blue eyes. Had Mydei not worked with the Head before, the latter’s sudden appearance would have startled him.
You fool! You have always been the Emperor’s dog!
Mydei, it is you who is the dog. You need to be subjugated. The Emperor will no longer tolerate defiance from you or your village.
Defiance! How laughable!
This is not a laughing matter.
This is no matter in the first place.
I am afraid, then, that this is not something we can talk through.
Mydei has no doubt that he can defeat Phainon. His only fear is that he will not be fast enough.
It seems you were right in following the signs because you are exceptionally lucky. The moon lights your path so that you can navigate your way through your abode with ease and speed. So far, there does not seem to be anybody trailing you, and the intruder is nowhere to be seen, so they are not targeting you either. At this rate, it is likely that the intruder has left Mydei’s office and is searching elsewhere.
You take a deep breath out of relief when you arrive at your chamber and realize that no one else is present. There is only one entrance to your bedroom, so you take extra care to be silent as you come around from behind the building, and when the coast is clear, you sneak into your room. You pay no mind that the inside is dark, as you know the placement of everything by heart. You approach the corner of the room where Mydei hid the wooden box inside a large jar with bamboo planks stacked on top. You remove everything one by one, hurrying but prioritizing the need for silence above all else. But, again, it seems luck is on your side, and you are able to retrieve the elixir without a hitch. You move everything back to their original placements, except for the medicinal ball that you tightly clutch in your fist.
All is well, until you step out of your bedroom. 
You cannot help but scream when you see Mydei, bloody and battered, fighting against Phainon, bruised and limping.
No!
Both of them cease their movements, surprised by your presence. But before either of them can come to, something surges up from beneath you, and a hand flies up to grab you by the neck, limiting your ability to breathe without delay.
It hurts. It is an excruciating pain of being crushed under a heavy weight. You have heard that suffocating is akin to drowning, which feels like being roasted and burned from the inside out. You wonder if Mydei has ever experienced pain like this, perhaps when he received those patches of permanently seared skin. In your choking, murky view, you can make out the blurred outline of Feng Meng, his face contorted in an ugly, deceitful frown as he breathes heavily. And through your pounding ears, you barely make out his words.
I know you have it! If you just give it to me, Madam, your life will be spared!
Even if you could talk, you would not answer. However, since you cannot speak anyway, you demonstrate your refusal by flailing, thrashing your legs in every direction possible and beating Feng Meng’s arms with your fists. You know that you are only wasting your energy, but since Feng Meng is not ready to kill you yet, you desperately take in shallow gasps of air as well. You can hear Mydei screaming your name over and over again in between silvery screeches of gold colliding against brass, and by now, you think your guards should be on their way to address the commotion. But even their arrival might be too late for you, and it seems your luck has run out.
Feng Meng’s grip on you tightens, preventing air from entering you entirely. You probably look like a fish out of water, uselessly gaping your mouth and sputtering drool all over.
Madam, I will only ask you once more, or I will take it by force! Please hand over the elixir!
It is no use. You will not give him the elixir, and he needs to retrieve it by any means. With no compromise in sight, the two of you are at a standstill. That means one of you has to take action.
Without another thought, with the last remnants of your fading strength, you bring your shaky fist to your greying lips and release your clutch, dropping the ball into your mouth. 
Then you swallow.
It is as if time has stopped, once again. Everyone else, including Mydei, is frozen in the middle of their actions, and only you are able to move for however long you have. You remove Feng Meng’s chokehold on you, and heave in desperate breaths.
Your mind immediately begins to clear, and that is made apparent when you sense her. Now that you know who she is, her omnipresence, preceded by a white light, is less frightening.
That was not intended for your use.
You take another deep, shuddering breath.
My apologies, Wang Mu Niang Niang. But I figured it would be better than handing it over to the likes of Feng Meng. He would have eaten it on the spot.
That was not a call for you to make.
But you knew this would happen. I know the divine are capable of seeing into the future.
You are too powerful for your own good. Perhaps this was the best outcome, after all.
Seeing that you are still on your own, you rush to Mydei’s side, placing a hand on his cheek. His eyes are wide, golden and rouge irises twinkling under the moonlight. His mouth is wide open, as he was probably in the midst of screaming at you to Just hand it over! There are blood splatters that cover his temple and neck, and you use your sleeve to rub those away, before peppering kisses onto the corners of his lips.
Mortal, I will allow you to bring two things from this earth to the moon, where you will join me.
You pause in the middle of your kissing to respond, icily.
If you are pitying me, I will have none of it.
Are you in any position to refuse pity? Regardless, you do not have a choice. This elixir is of my making, so you must obey my commands. On the moon you will reside, and every year on this day, I will grant you the opportunity to see your beloved on this earth.
You leave one last kiss on your husband’s nose before you step back. Although you will be able to see him once a year, it feels… strange. You had promised yourself that, upon Mydei’s return, the two of you would be able to return to your normal routine and only be subjected to a few hours’ worth of separation every day. Even now, as you let your eyes linger over every centimeter of his face, you can tell that much of him has changed throughout his campaign, and before you have the chance to memorize his new contours and creases, it is you who must leave, by divinity’s demand, and you will never be able to know him as well as you once did.
How strange and twisted, you think, but for some reason, there is a distinct sense of acceptance within you. Perhaps the past two years have tested you, and you no longer fear fate’s outcomes because, at the very least, Mydei did the impossible in defeating Tian’s dwellers and survived. It might also be that you know Wang Mu Niang Niang is already demonstrating as much mercy as the heavens will allow, so even if you were to throw a fit or beg for more, the goddess herself would not be able to do anything. Or maybe, at one indistinguishable point, you unconsciously resigned yourself to the divine, and knowing that it will do anything it can to torment you, you have carried that grief along and never once set it down. This sudden unraveling of your life and the way you have known it to be has simply allowed that grief to surface, and you can only shake your head when faced with the darkened, disintegrating state of your heart.
You proceed to shuffle backwards, away from Mydei, until he is barely out of reach. You take the golden cuff that holds his front braid together, before you walk to the nearby courtyard where the rabbits reside. You uncover their burrow, unrooting purple forget-me-nots and creeping buttercups, and reach in to pull out the runt of the newest litter, no different from a solid figurine in your palm.
I am ready.
How strange, your choices. Explain to me, mortal.
There is not much to it. I suppose I find sentimentality in things that keep me going.
How bold of you, to not tell the truth in front of the likes of me.
You could force it out of me, if you so wish.
You watch as a staircase and railing of stardust, moonlight, and cosmic nothingness appear before your eyes in the middle of the courtyard, spiraling upwards and into the sky, ending somewhere far beyond where the moon hangs. You stare at Mydei’s braid cuff and the baby rabbit, which you notice is beginning to shiver, and you tuck both of them in the inside of your robe before ascending the first steps of the staircase.
As you climb, you notice the earth below you gradually resuming its time. A breeze brushes past the tips of your ears, and you delight in the perfume of fresh mint, blooming magnolias, and rose peonies it carries. In the distance, an owl hoots, and a pair of magpies flutter down to a pond you cannot see. You lose yourself to the natural order of the earth because, soon, you will leave this land.
Suddenly, a yell of your name draws you back. You lean over the railing and see that below, Mydei is gazing up at you. You can still make out the expression on his face – one of loss, desperation, and frustration. He is biting on his lower lip, and there are divots between his eyebrows. His eyes appear especially glossy and bright underneath the moon’s light.
Where are you going?
To the moon.
Can you come back down to me?
I cannot.
Your husband takes a few seconds before replying, and as you wait, the sound of grass blades ruffling and bats flying fill the silence.
I see. Then can I come up to you?
Wang Mu Niang Niang intercedes.
No. You will live out the rest of your life and die on this earth.
You and Mydei share a solemn look. Neither of you can say anything, as both of you have begun to weep, quiet tears clumping together eyelashes and rolling down the apples of your cheeks. But Mydei is also aware of the unforgiving reality that you may disappear at sudden, so with a shaky, breaking voice, he attempts to carry on the flow of the conversation, clinging onto any chance to hear his wife’s voice again.
When will I next see you?
Whenever the moon rises.
I will look up at the night sky every evening. And in person?
Every year, on this day, at this time.
I will meet with you every year. I swear.
I look forward to it, my love.
Are you cold? I am sure it is cold on the moon.
Do not worry. I have all that I need.
Wang Mu Niang Niang intercedes once more.
Enough of your idle chatter!
But the two of you carry on, because both of you have realized that Wang Mu Niang Niang is kind, and no longer are the two of you fearful of Tian or the divine or divinity as a whole. Rather, in the last, ticking seconds that you have, it is most important to cherish and express the unyielding, everlasting love you have for each other, as husband and wife. With soft, longing smiles, you utter the same sentence together.
We are forever –
– under the same sky.
Both of you press your fingers to your lips before extending your arms out towards each other, hoping that the full extent of your yearning, love, and devotion will be conveyed and reach the other. Then, with a flash of blinding white light, you disappear from Mydei’s sight.
You, of course, can still see him, but you will yourself to turn your chin away and climb up, up, up so that by tomorrow night, you will have made it to the moon, and Mydei will be able to see you from the window of your shared bedroom.
The world resumes, as if you were never there at all, as if time never stopped flowing. But Mydei knows you were real, are real. He reminds himself he need only survive tonight alone, and tomorrow, he will see you again, for the two of you can never be apart for too long.
And he is right because, by the decree of the heavenly gods above and their kindred spirits down on the earth in the forms of the water, leaves, wind, and destiny, you and Mydeimos are for each other, to always be intertwined and inseparable in this vast, vast universe.
“Lao Lao, why do we eat mooncakes during the Mid-Autumn Festival?” A little boy, no more than six- or seven-years-old sits at the dining table, feet kicking back and forth as they dangle off the edge of a chair meant for an adult. On the table, there is an array of emptied pots and plates, evidence of a large and festive meal devoured. Sitting directly across from him on the other side is his maternal grandmother.
“Because the lady on the moon likes them,” the grandma replies, preoccupied with tearing apart the packaging of a mooncake, which she hands to her grandson.
“Why do we care about the lady on the moon?”
The grandma’s eyebrows furrow. “Aye, Duo Duo, watch what you say! It is an important cultural celebration.”
“But why?”
“So many questions! She saved her husband, alright?”
“What happened to her husband?”
The grandson watches his grandma pause before recalling, “He was murdered by his student with a club made out of a peach tree.”
“Woah, that’s oddly specific. Did the husband love the lady on the moon?”
“Of course! Do you know nothing about the Mid-Autumn Festival? Before his death, the husband would burn incense and stare up at the moon every night to see his wife, and every year, today was the only day he could meet his wife in person. That is why we honor our ancestors during this festival, because we are closest to them now.”
The grandson shrugs, having lost interest halfway through his grandma’s explanation, romance lost on his inexperienced shoulders. “Sounds weird.”
“Duo Duo!”
The grandson ignores his grandma and pries open his mooncake. “Wait, Lao Lao, can you eat the yolk for me?”
“Aiyah, just eat it all yourself!”
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azmaarts · 7 days ago
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WARNING: Do NOT read my tags if you’re worried about 3.1 spoilers.
Drew HSR Achilles and Patroclus. :P
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Someone pls tell me how to pose Phainon’s foot. I kid you not, I spent at least 3 hours on that foot and it still doesn’t look right. TAT (Mydei’s back too.)
Edit (3/30): To the person who tagged #op this is gorgeous, YOU’RE gorgeous.
Also, I’m glad I could contribute to the list of fanart that are persuading you to join the ship. We’re a happy and healthy community thriving off the waves of copium. Come join. :D
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pearl-blue-musings · 1 month ago
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Mydei was pissed.
Not because his friend wasn’t his joyful and competitive self, but because he had to watch from the sidelines. He watched his rival dismiss his feelings for you, saw how Phainon would soften his stance whenever he thought of you. He would see him leaving your place with a goofy grin the prince had never seen. How could one person do this?
And then he saw you smile. And Mydei understood. Mydei understood how his friend could fall in love with you with just a glance. As he was caught in your web of love too. Sometimes he would go check on you when Phainon was away, and how easily you welcomed him. You made him feel understood and seen in ways he thought would not happen to him. Mydei understood Phainon completely.
So of course it hurt when you told him how much you loved his friend.
It makes sense. He’s the crown prince of strife, why would anyone see him as an option? Your smile was so innocent, so love filled that he couldn’t be angry with you. Not when you were oblivious to the man’s love. Mydei was just about to leave your place upon hearing of Phainon’s return, he tells you:
“Don’t hurt him. He may be an idiot, but you’re important to him. Which means you’re important to me.”
Mydei destroyed more titankin in under an hour than he had done previously after hearing your home was attacked.
I’m thinking about Phainon
I’m thinking about how Phainon is a man with needs, a man who compartmentalizes his feelings, wants, and needs. He has no time for a serious relationship (if he did they might end up leaving or hurting him and he’s not ready for that). He wants to be able to get his rocks off and leave, thanking you for the time before he has to keep being a warrior and fighting for a better Amphoreous.
But he keeps visiting you. After every hard battle, every mundane day, every too long day, he finds himself returning to the holy city, walking up 3 flights of stairs and going into the house on the corner on the left. He doesn’t have time to care for any one person, he claims as he kisses you and picks you up to lead you to the bedroom. He’s a Chrysos Heir and the people come first, he repeats like a mantra as he places your calves on his shoulders. He says that everyone he’s ever been close to leaves or abandons him as he cuddles you close to his bare chest. Amphoreous comes first, you’ll be second he says.
When the Strife and titankin try to infiltrate Okehma, he runs to your home first. You’re safe, Phainon notes, before going back out to protect the city (you). Mydei rolls his eyes as they converse in the hero’s bath. “You talk about ‘em all the time, tell them how you feel before your big sacrifice.” Phainon’s eyes widen then. It hasn’t dawned on him that he’s made you a special person in his life, and it took his rival and friend to point it out. Something shifts inside the warrior and his demeanor changes.
When the black tide threatens again, he leaves the city without haste. He doesn’t think of you or the way you would kiss him goodbye. He doesn’t think of whispered tales of luck for him. He doesn’t think about your prayers and blessings to him. No, he thinks of his duty to his people and that is all that should be on his mind.
Phainon refuses to acknowledge the fact that you’re gone. Why did you have to be at home when the titankin attacked? He refuses to acknowledge the gifts left at your grave, thinking that when he goes to your place you’ll be there smiling and telling him, “welcome home, my love.”
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ddiwata · 1 month ago
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if you could only know me (like your prayers at night) — the day you said goodnight, hale
— mydeimos x fem! wife! reader
— help.. help.. his words to phainon.. i cant breathe.. requests open!!
— warnings : MAJOR spoilers for the new quest, angst 💔💔 just tears and desperation idk!! no usage of y/n :3 devil works hard but i work extremely harder
— 🩸
“i’ll be leaving okhema soon to fight the greatest darkness of the world. and to shoulder nikador’s destiny. so, listen well: if there comes a day when we meet again on the battlefield, and i stand opposed to the flame-chase..
remember to stab your sword into my back and through my tenth thoracic vertebra. that’s my weakspot, and the only way to kill me.”
mydeimos’ last words to phainon. he planned to pack up and leave, with nothing but the clothes he has on and his bloodlust coursing through his veins. but every time he gazes down at his fingers, stained with the blood of too many to count. but the twinkle of gold around his ring finger makes him hesitate. he shouldn’t hesitate. he isn’t someone who hesitates.
but the words of his wife rings in his head. “i had these rings forged! look, it’s gold. it matches your armor!” his heart clenches and he can’t bear to say goodbye. to leave her like this. but he can’t bear to see her eyes fill with tears, her hands trembling as she pleads for him to stay when he says goodbye.
too many people he’s slain, too many people grovel at his feet. but every time his wife sobs, he feels mortal. fragile. so he leaves when night has fallen over their humble abode. his wife’s body comfortable underneath the weighted blanket they share, locks messy and her face relaxed— often marred by horror and concern when she finds out he’s died for the nth time after another battle.
he prays—for the first time—that his love won’t cry when she finds out. standing at the gate, where he’ll leave and won’t come back, he exhales deeply.
“walk out of okhema and i swear to the gods, i will divorce you, mydeimos.” the frail threat hangs in the air, and the prince turns around to see his wife��beautiful, tired, and utterly radiant. his breath hitches and he swallows. “it was a mistake giving that coreflame up. you know that, my love,” he looks away, eyebrows furrowing.
“why didn’t you wake me?” she asks firmly, voice cracking in a moment of weakness. mydei knows she’s trembling, fighting the urge to hold onto him. “i didn’t want to see the only reason why i want to stay hurt because of something i did. i left you a letter, but i’m.. horrible at writing.” he groans, his armored feet moving without the intention to.
he falls in his beloved’s arms, soft, sweet, and holding him so tightly. “my love, please forgive me.” de whispers, his cold, gloved hands grasping onto his wife’s cheeks. for the first time in a while, he feels tears trail down his cheeks and her soft thumb wiping it away as she stares up at him.
“you must go. and i understand..” she presses her forehead against her husband’s, nose brushing against his as she exhales softly, “do not lose yourself. come home to me.. please.”
a swift press to her lips, his own locking onto his wife’s, a familiar gesture— but this time it’s filled with grief. longing— desperation. he pulls away just as he kisses her, and with a gentle squeeze to her arms, he leaves, disappearing with the wind.
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harmeu · 3 months ago
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ARGUMENTS 
(HSR X READER) (ANGST)
(Amphoreus Men)
(GN!READER)
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MYDEI: (His devotion to his fight which results in neglect.)
You couldn’t remember the last time you and your beloved spouse had talked to each other. It was as if Mydei’s mind was constantly on things that neglected you heavily. Even a simple “How are you today”  would’ve been enough at this point. It hurt a lot. As if millions of daggers pierced you everytime Mydei walked past without saying anything. You were his lover for God’s sake.
Mydei was in the training room punching dummies with ease, letting them break into shards as they thumped onto the ground, his knuckles bleeding heavily from the constant fight.
You stepped in peeking through the small opening of the door with your wide gaze contemplating to yourself if you should walk in and say something or not. 
Eventual acceptance of the option ‘yes’ overthrew your mind so you walked in and Mydei’s keen senses picked up on it immediately.
“What is it.” His gruff reply made it sound like he was annoyed. (Which he probably was.) 
“You’ve been busy lately.” You mumbled out moving from one foot to another a bit nervous to how he was going to reply.
“Of course I am. You know my duties.” Mydei went back to smashing his fists against the solid wooden dummies as you winced at the sight and decided to walk up, up to him.
“I miss you.” You murmured out making Mydei freeze slightly and you could’ve sworn he softened. But as fast as it came it vanished. Mydei was back to his tense state. 
“You should know everything I deal with in a singular day.”
“But I’m your lover!” You exclaimed out flinching at your own tone of voice and words making Mydei turn looking at you in your eye for the first time. 
“That doesn’t matter.” He huffed out. Okay wow. Now it was your turn to be cruel.
“No wonder everyone finds you difficult.” You spat back leaving the door slamming heavily making the walls vibrate as Mydei stared dumbfounded at the shut door clenching his fists.
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PHANION: (Accusations that result in anger.)
Phanion was a gentle soul with you. The perfect boyfriend in your eyes. Though as days passed you had a weird gut feeling. As if he was talking to someone other than you. Not possible. Right. The constant ‘they’re just a friend’ sounded like a lie. But you didn’t have any proof. Not yet at least.
Phanion was sitting on your local bench quietly reading as you walked up to him with a half lidded gaze of suspicion. Feeling your hard gaze Phanion sighed, shutting his book and standing up to match your height.
“Don’t give me that look.” Phanion murmured frowning with a pained expression on his face making you feel a hint of guilt. 
“It’s just that you’re constantly not letting me meet your friends at all. As if you’re hiding something from me.” Your fists clenched, eyeing up at Phanion as he narrowed his own gaze at your words.
“I do not let you meet them in order for them to not do anything to you darling.” Lies. You repeated in your head. You were being unreasonable. You knew that. But your gut feeling never failed you. 
“I don’t believe you.” You said spitefully making Phanion droop in hurt as you frowned at his reaction. You were expecting anger.
“Why don’t you trust me?” Phanion said holding your hand. He really had to pull that card out didn’t he.
“I do..I just.” As if knowing you were in the wrong, the only option left in your mind was to get out of the scene immediately. You let go of Phanions hand shakily leaving Phanion standing next to the bench alone as he stared at your slowly disappearing figure with a pained look.
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ANAXA: (His anger towards the Gods.)
You knew your spouse's hatred towards the Gods. It never bothered you really because the people of Amphoreus worshipped titans rather than the Aeons above. Though Anaxa seemed to be solely focused on that singular emotion of hatred removing everything else in his life. Including you.
You were sitting in bed with Anaxa as he fixed up his eyepatch with his usual elegance as he eyed the several books in front of him that talked about the several elements the Gods gave down to the mortals.
“Anaxa.” You mumbled out tilting your head as Anaxa hummed out a reply as you frowned. “Why are you so focused on this subject?” 
Anaxa sighed at your words as if he was contemplating you speaking out on this matter and turned his gaze towards you. 
“You don’t know what these Aeons have done to our people. They’re vultures.” Anaxa spat out with seeming elegance despite his harsh words. 
“I feel like you’re forgetting about everything to focus on this.” You said a hushed whisper as Anaxa narrowed his gaze.
“That’s utter lies darling. I have enough mindspace to deal with everything.” You stared at him blankly. You doubted it at this point honestly.
“I feel like you’re lying.” Silence dawned between the two of you at your words as if rendering Anaxa speechless from your statement. Which added onto your doubt from his quietness. 
Silently Anaxa grabbed his things and left. 
Did he just storm off?
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I post in like once a century oopsie (Since I don't know anything about the characters personalities I went off looks and the trailers)
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harmonysanreads · 2 months ago
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Thinking about Yandere!Mydei braiding your hair. This mighty, invincible man removing pieces of his armory, so that they won't have a chance of harming even a strand of hair.
He handles it as if he was tasked with keeping the clouds in his grasp, each movement of his fingers measured, strength forbidden from flowing without his command. His concentration prevents him from blinking altogether, as such, the final product appears to be clumsier, as though the craft of amateur hands. It can be seen as hints in his eyes, he's terrified of pulling too hard, creating unwanted knots betwixt the locks.
Your amusement would beget laughs had you not been numbed by the same hands, the grip that brought so much harm now frightened at the prospect of twisting your hair wrong. You can offer nothing more than blinks as the Crown Prince scrambles for accessories, lips pursed in comical pondering about which ones should complete the braid.
You don't critique how you end up looking by the end of this fit of whimsy, you make no protest as he resumes holding you close wordlessly. An odd apology, even if you don't accept it by heart, you know pretending to do so will bring less pain to both of your souls.
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starcurtain · 2 months ago
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Another Phaidei Fic I Want to Read
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It's the political arranged marriage AU but make it (ooooo) complicated~
Crown Prince Mydeimos of Castrum Kremnos was born under a dark star, with a prophecy of abject despair uttered at the moment of his birth: Mydeimos will be the last king of Kremnos. The city-state will fall, her people will be lost, and the glory of Strife entirely will fade into nameless oblivion. Year after year, the prophets repeat the same warnings: Mydeimos is cursed, and he will bring the downfall of their kingdom and all its inhabitants.
But no one in Kremnos knew just how cursed their prince was until the day the regent's war council convinced their king to do the unthinkable: If Mydeimos was sacrificed, perhaps their prophecy of destruction could be averted and Kremnos saved...
Only Mydei couldn't even die like he was supposed to. No matter how many times he was mortally wounded, the boy just kept standing up--not even Thanatos would take him. That glorious death in battle that all Kremnoan warriors were expected to achieve--even this most central aspect of Mydei's own culture rejected him.
This life of betrayal and total loneliness, with the promise of eventually destroying everything he knew and cared for, seemed inescapable--until one day, when Mydeimos had already passed the age of majority (and would have long since been allowed to challenge his father for the crown if it weren't for the despair prophesied to be his reign), a new vision was shared among all of their people's seers: There was a way to avert their kingdom's impending destruction and save their people. "Only the son of Aedes Elysiae can deliver Castrum Kremnos from the dark tide and restore the true king to her throne."
Aedes Elysiae is a tiny city-state with nowhere near enough military might to defend against a full onslaught from the Kremnoans. But the risk that the Elysian prince could be harmed--and all of Kremnos' future lost in the process--is too high to engage in a traditional war of conquest. Although it runs contrary to the Kremnoans' very natures, if it means securing their kingdom's future and hiding the truth of their foreseen fate forever, they will engage in any manner of subterfuge and political maneuvering necessary.
Namely, by using the threat of war to force Aedes Elysiae to surrender their crown prince to a permanent and binding political alliance. If the Elysians want to avoid obliteration by the military might of the Kremnoans, they will tie the destiny of their crown prince to the Strifewalkers' through blood and oath--a marriage to Kremnos' own Prince Mydeimos. In this way, perhaps the curse can finally be outweighed by the glory of a savior.
Enter Phainon: the pride and joy of Aedes Elysiae, the golden sun to his people, loved by everyone who knows him. Although his heart has always been soft and romantic, rebelling fiercely at the idea of marrying someone he's never met and doesn't love, there is nothing Phainon won't do to protect his people and his kingdom--even if it means sacrificing himself.
So Phainon agrees to leave his family and homeland behind, and makes the miserable journey to Castrum Kremnos to meet his destiny... as well as his new husband.
Too bad Mydei wants absolutely nothing to do with him.
Disgusted by his father's willingness to forsake Kremnos' sacred principles of pride and integrity by using underhanded tactics and falsehoods to force Aedes Elysiae's prince into compliance, Mydei refuses to even acknowledge his marriage to Phainon, let alone look in his fellow prince's direction.
Which wouldn't be a problem, honestly, if it weren't for the fact that poor Phainon is smitten within days.
When the Kremnoans were strong-arming Aedes Elysiae's king into giving up his beloved son, why had no one thought to just tell Phainon that Prince Mydeimos was so... so... upright and honest and brave and powerful and gorgeous and straightforward and humorous and quick-witted and honorable and also gorgeous? (Phainon thinks perhaps this last point should be repeated a few more times for good measure.) Truly, Phainon might have gone willingly if anyone had just thought to show him a portrait of his husband-to-be in advance!
While Phainon struggles to catch his own husband's attention and soften Mydei's seemingly unbreakable stone heart, Mydei struggles with his father's demands to keep his curse hidden, to not reveal the omen of destruction lurking behind this sham of a marriage. Though having to lie shreds every last tatter of pride Mydei has, if this prince of Aedes Elysiae discovers the truth, that he's been brought here solely to counteract Mydei's prophesied inability to reign, Kremnos' enemies will know it within the hour. A single weakness will be all the world needs to turn on the Kremnoans, to bring Mydei's terrible destiny to pass.
And... And if Phainon learns the truth about Mydeimos, about his curse, about how he is an abomination that not even death will accept, about the misery he is destined to bring, about the failures that are sure to come, about how he is hated by his country, his people, his own family--then Mydei will lose the first person who has ever smiled freely at him, ever wanted to walk beside him, ever spoke kind words in his direction...
There is no way Phainon would ever look at him the same again.
There is no way Phainon would stay.
And that would be cruelest fate of all.
(What Mydei and Castrum Kremnos don't know is that Phainon has a secret of his own: He's not royalty by blood in the slightest. He was a penniless orphan who just got lucky enough to be taken in by the castle and end up, through twists in his own destiny, to be raised by the childless rulers of Elysiae from nothing but the kindness of their hearts.
There is no son of Aedes Elysiae to save Castrum Kremnos from its fate--and the dark tide comes for all.
But visions bestowed by the gods must not be doubted. Perhaps the combined efforts of two lonely people--the one who forsook his own land for love and the one who could only be loved by someone from another land--will see the sun of Aedes Elysiae delivered to Kremnos once more...
And put a true and honest king upon her throne at last.)
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jebunkle · 1 month ago
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goodnight, I love you
sadness for valentines day bc why not :p angst, no comfort, reader's death, use of y/n, gn!reader, smitten mydei, reader is implied to be a chrysos heir
in short;; the saying that kremnoans don't do romance is proven true after mydei failed to be there for his lover. — 1.1k wc
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blond light filtered in through the translucent curtains that hung over your windows, providing a comfortable light to awaken in. when mydei opened his eyes, the first thing they landed on was your ethereal form. you had already been basking in the warmth a few moments before the prince next to you had woken up.
the man groaned before turning over to face you fully. "mornin'." he grumbled out, causing you to turn your neck to face him. as you gazed at his drowsy state, you couldn't help but let a chuckle escape your lips. "good morning," you replied, your voice tinged with a lovingness he could only find with you.
the dawn was young as it shimmered on you, creating the most beautiful sight that one could imagine. something mydei loved about you was your effortless charisma, how you managed to be so inviting and careful during your duties and at home was beyond him.
"how long've you been up?" he asked groggily, yawning and extending his muscular arms out. something you loved about mydei was his own effortless charisma— to you, at least. his typically fierce glare always hindered when it was directed at you, instead replacing by a look of unadulterated admiration. you wondered if he was maybe hallucinating when he looked at you, considering the awe-struck look in his eyes.
"couple of minutes. the morning is particularly enchanting right now, no?" you replied, turning your eyes back to the window.
mydei grunted before sitting up as well, the silk sheets moving around his body like liquid. "it is." he answered, slightly taken aback by the unusual relief it gave.
before you could add onto the gawking of the sunrise, one of mydei's sturdy arms latched around your abdomen, pulling you back down into the soft sheets. you squeaked out a gasp in surprise, glaring down at him in confusion, "you're especially clingy today." you murmured to him, your tone bemused and teasing. "it's cold. just trying to stay warm." he excused, which in turn you laughed at.
as the two of you laid there in an undisturbed silence, your eyelids slowly began to grow heavy once more. mydei glanced down at your weary form, smiling smugly to himself at the fact that he managed to settle you down for a few more minutes of sleep. it may not be a lot, but time spent with you is worth more than anything. though the dusk was long to come, mydei could think of one thing to say; "goodnight," he whispered faintly, as to not disturb you, "i love you."
———
smoke drifted atop a tethered battlefield. there was a lingering sensation of defeat and desolation that flowed with the stuffy oxygen, creating a lump in mydei's throat.
blood was smeared over his chin, a result of the red droplets that fell from a small gash in his cheek. his golden eyes searched the worn soil franticly, begging to catch a glimpse of your face, to see that you were alive. all he needed now was the solace that you granted by simply being in his presence.
you, some yards from your lover, were seated uncomfortably against broken cement that you could only assume used to be a wall; the small civilization that once resided here had been reduced to crumbs.
heavy breathing could be heard in the distance, coupled with what sounded like distraught scuttling. you slowly opened your eyes to pin the location of the panic stricken footsteps, but were met with a sharp sting to your retinas. the smoke of the ruins had hardly settled and began to prick at your senses, inducing you to choke out a few strained coughs.
the small and vulnerable sound of someone gasping reached mydeimos' ears, to which he turned his head rapidly. he held an armored arm over his forehead, trying to shield his eyes from any of the smog that could possibly distract him.
through the grey, a figure could be outlined in the distance. they were hunched, hair messed up, and appeared to be holding their torso with one hand.
mydei's eyes widened as he rushed towards the individual, crouching down to meet them, "y/n? y/n!" he barked out your name, shaking you roughly to try and disturb you from the unconsciousness you succumbed to.
hardly aware, you wearily parted your eyelids, staring up into a familiar pair of optics. when mydei gazed at you, it was full of unadulterated admiration; however, two golden, terrified eyes met yours. you raised an eyebrow at him, "what?.." you said lazily, your head falling to the side.
mydei reached out to hold your face steadily, slowly bringing you into his arms as he knelt next to you. "no, no, no, what happened?!" he yelled. you would've flinched at his intense tone, but almost everything was drowned out by the drumming of your slowing heart. "why are you injured? what happened?!" he repeated, his tone less vigorous, yet still harsh.
mydei knew what happened. he should've been right next to you throughout the entire clash, he should've been behind you for you to fall back on, he was supposed to stand side by side as you two fought tirelessly to end the confrontation; yet he wasn't.
"mydeimos," you breathed out, your throat scratchy and pained. "i'm sorry." you mumbled, unaware of how pitiful you sounded.
"no, don't apologize, we're going to get out of here now." he commanded, his grip on your body tightening much to your discomfort.
a fatigued groan exerted from you as you removed your hand from the lethal gash in your abdomen. blood pooled around your clothing, tainting the fabric. mydei looked between your face and the wound, his breath picking up with panic.
"don't look at me like that.." you murmured remorsefully, reaching a crimson colored hand up to his face. your dirtied hand rested on his cheek as crystal drops of tears fell from mydei's eyes for the first time in forever.
the evening fell upon the two of you, a cold breeze coating the landscape. the land darkened and it seemed it was just the two of you in all of amphoreus. your gaze lingered from his pained face to the rising moon, and then back to him. "please," he begged, clutching you tighter and pulling him towards your chest as if to warm you up.
your hand fell from his face after a moment, the usual beaming color of your face draining slowly. your bottom lip quivered from the chill as you stared up at your lover.
"goodnight, mydei," you sighed. "i love you."
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uhh this was made at 2:21 am so not really proofread :p I shld make some comfort after this to cheer yall up lmk who u want it with loool
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m-inntii · 2 months ago
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[BEWARE!! SPOILERS FOR AMPHOREUS AND GAY MEN!!!,!,
MYDEI AND PHAINON YOU GAY LIL SHITS YOU AIN’ FUCKIN SLICK I SEE YA.
Phainon hesitating when leaving Mydei, wanting to help him before leaving anyway, and then being an anxious mess outside, being shown worrying about him every moment, like 😭
(also ignoring the fact iT’S FUCKING IMPLIED HE WAS GONG TO SACRIFICE HERSELF I THINK?? IDK TAKE MY WORDS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT CUZ I DIDNT UNDERSTAND SHIT ABT WHAT HE WAS GONNA DO BUT LIKE BRO SXPECT AN ENTIRE RANT TO HIM AT SOME POINT.)
Phainon SPECIFCALLY told Mydei NOT to come to his ceremony because he should heal up, and he still did ANYWAY cause he was WORRIED. LIKE- Self-deprecating and all that Mydei is sure but HE CAME TO HIS CEREMONY WHILE INJURED BECAUSE HE WAS WRORRIED FOR HIM LIKE…bruv you ain’ beating no allegations
Phainon beign the only person Mydei can truly spar without holding back, and eveN SPARRING FOR 10 FUCKING DAYS STRAIGHT ONCE??? WHAT???
ALSO THIS
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LIKE OH MY GOD THEY CARE SM FOR EACH OTHEER KIKE BRO I’M CRYINg
also you cannot tell me that Phainon is depressed in some way. He lost his entire hometown apparently, his entire mission is fueled purely out of a want for revenge, and the only reason he took up the role of the chye so heirs is because it gave him a purpose like…lol he’s so depressed. Mydei please help your boy
ALSO APPARENT THERE’S A MEMORY CORE OF PHAINON BASICALLY CALLING MYDEI HOT??? LIKE??
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ag40249 · 1 month ago
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be sure that even the worst in me won't hurt you
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varesai · 8 days ago
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༉‧₊˚. THEY’RE JUST BLOWIN’ SMOKE
𝖳𝖾𝗅𝗅 𝗆𝖾, 𝗂𝗌 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗍𝗍𝗂𝖾𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗇 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗇𝖾𝗍? 𝖠𝗋𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝖼𝗈𝗈𝗅 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽? 𝖮𝗋, 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝖺𝖿𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝖺 𝖻𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗄𝗎𝗉 𝖾𝗑𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗌𝖾𝖽 𝗂𝗇 𝖽𝗂𝖿𝖿𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗅𝗒𝗋𝗂𝖼𝗌 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆 𝖦𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗂𝖾 𝗌𝗈𝗇𝗀𝗌?
✧ 𝖧𝖾𝗅𝗅𝗈 𝗁𝗂 𝗁𝖾𝗅𝗅𝗈 𝖨 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝖦𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗂𝖾 𝖠𝖻𝗋𝖺𝗆𝗌 𝗌𝗈 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝖨’𝗆 𝗌𝗈 𝖽𝖾𝗏𝗂𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖨 𝖼𝖺𝗇’𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗌𝖾𝗍 𝖺𝗍 𝗅𝗈𝗅𝗅𝖺𝗉𝖺𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗓𝖺 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗒𝖾𝖺𝗋 :( 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝖨’𝗆 𝗌𝖾𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖮𝗅𝗂𝗏𝗂𝖺 𝖱𝗈𝖽𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗈 (𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 2𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾!!!!!!!) 𝖠𝗇𝖽 𝖲𝖺𝖻𝗋𝗂𝗇𝖺 𝖢𝖺𝗋𝗉��𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗒𝖾𝖺𝗋 𝗌𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝗄𝖾𝗌 𝗎𝗉 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗂𝗍. 𝖤𝗇𝗃𝗈𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝖻𝗅𝗎𝗋𝖻 𝗅𝗈𝗅
𝖳𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗌 𝗌𝗈𝗋𝗍𝖺 𝗌𝖺𝖽 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗆 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗌𝗎𝗎𝗎𝗉𝖾𝗋 𝗆𝖾𝖺𝗇 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌… 𝗈𝗁 𝗐𝖾𝗅𝗅..? 𝖠𝗇𝗒𝗐𝖺𝗒𝗌 𝗇𝗈 𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝖻𝖾𝗌𝗂𝖽𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗌𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗌 𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗆𝖾𝖺𝗇
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⍣ ೋ THATS JUST THE WAY LIFE GOES. - I Love You, I’m Sorry ⍣ 0:33
They just have to learn how to take it. They’re very jealous of your new relationship, but they won’t ever tell anybody. They can’t get over you, how could you move on so fast? It’s not fair, they think.
They can’t stand the way you laugh with this new person. It makes their blood boil when you hold hands with them or hug them. And it especially makes them upset when you take them to the spot they used to take you.
It makes them wonder what they did wrong. How did they mess up so bad that you can laugh that way with somebody else? How did they mess up so bad that you could be so much happier with somebody different? They wish they knew. But for now, they’ll sulk in your shadow, wishing you’d go back to them.
- Argenti, Aventurine, Gepard, Jiaoqiu, Sunday
⍣ ೋ YOU FELL HARD, I THOUGHT ‘GOOD RIDDANCE’ - Best ⍣ 0:30
They didn’t treat you very well during your relationship, and they faced the consequences.
They couldn’t believe it at first when you left. You left in the night, and they were faced with the shock of your absence when they woke up in the morning. It was only a couple days later when they realized what they did wrong.
They destroyed the beautiful fantasies you held in your head. They played with your feelings, they lied to you. And they didn’t even realize it until they were faced with loneliness. They realized that what they did was so, very wrong. And they admit fault, they’ll take all the blame. But they wish they didn’t have to loose you like that.
- Blade, Jade, Jingliu, Kafka, Gallagher.
⍣ ೋ I’M A SHAMELESS CALLER, YOU’RE A FULL MACHINE - Full Machine ⍣ 1:14
You’re unable to control where you stand in their life, and it’s ruining you. You had to break up with them, because it was not healthy for you.
Always having to beg them for a little bit of attention, just to say something nice about you. But they won’t, and it’s killing you. (Following up with the lyric “I love you, it’s ruining my life” in fortnight but this isn’t about Taylor today)
You know that they just won’t budge, even when you need them the most. You’ll heal, but even faster if they’re by your side. But they won’t be there, and you know that. So the most you can do is leave and see how they feel once they realize.
- Jing Yuan, Luocha, Mydei, Ruan Mei
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