#my word what breathtaking imagination and perfect representation as ever

[flying-elliska]

Okay, I'm reading Chap18, and I really hope this comment won't hurt your feelings because I love your fic and I really just want to understand why you wrote it this way, but I have to tell you that for the first time I've been disapointed with Diamants AU. I already felt it was going this way with Daphné, Arthur, Vallès, Emma and Alexia being LGBT, but I kind of felt betrayed with the Yann/Alex thing, and now I'm sensing Manon and Daphné will be together at some point too and ...(1)

...I don't understand why you made all your characters LGBT. I get that they are under-represented in most of the books and shows, but with Diamants I'm kind of feeling like being staight is a bad thing, like it's either boring or you're juste an asshole. I've always loved Skam because it shows that very different people can be friends and help each other no matter their religion, sexuality... and this kind of felt like the only reason they stand together is they're all LGBT (2) and I guess this comes from personal experience but that would have been so much more powerful to have straight people being as much invested in this war as the others. Honestly I don't see the point of Yann, Alex, Emma, Manon or Arthur not being straight, for me it doesn't bring more to who they are. This really feels like they would be nothing if they were straight. So I juste wanted to ask you why you decided this? Again, really hope this won't hurt you... (3/3)

hey anon. So, I’m going to assume this comes from a place of good faith and a sincere desire to understand, and explain my choices. That said, I do have to say that even though it didn’t really hurt me (it mostly made me laugh), it did make me a little angry too, because there are a lot of harmful implications in your messages.

1) First of all, about you “not seeing the point” of making certain characters LGBT. This functions under the assumption that there needs to be a reason for people to be gay, bi, trans, etc - and that straight people are the default. That is...really not great. People are gay in real life, for no reason whatsoever. If you don’t go to writers asking why they made their characters straight if there is no reason in the story, you shouldn’t do this either. Characters can be queer without it being a big part of the story - it’s just a part of them, and the idea that they have to ‘deserve a place’ in the narrative through their gayness (often through a deeply tragic arc full of suffering to Educate Straight people) is deeply heteronormative, and fucked up. LGBT people are not in a story to make a point, they’re there because they exist. Yes, some of my characters have arcs that are deeply entangled with their sexuality and struggles with it. Some are not. When it comes to Yann and Alex, I didn’t think too much about it, I thought it would be funny and unexpected and give some good shenanigans. Sometimes that’s all you need.

2) As for turning a majority of the canon straight characters LGBT : listen, in the end, this is my fic, and I do it because I want to. I’m bi and my life is full of queer people. This is my normal, this is what comes naturally to me, and what I find interesting to write about. I set out to write a James Bond parody with some deep character exploration, it’s meant to be a very transformative fic. I have no obligation to stick to any Skam ‘guidelines’. I am also not aiming to write a particularly realistic story, if the secret mobster conspiracy didn’t tick you off already. The ethos of fic is to make canon your playground and to let your imagination go wild. That said, this trope you’re probably used to, of having one or maybe two queer characters and not more in any given story, I would say is the less realistic one. In real life, LGBT people often tend to cluster together, often before they even realize their sexuality, especially as they get older. But a lot of mainstream media is afraid of that because they don’t want to alienate their straight audience, so they don’t show it. I have no such compunctions. Your message seems to imply that there is a limit to how many gay people there should be in a story and I find that deeply offensive. There is incredible relief, peace and power to be found in community, especially after being struggling so much with your sexuality, like Lucas did for instance. I wanted to show that joy in this chapter, and how it plays a part in him slowly letting his walls down.

3) I notice you don’t mention Imane. She’s straight, she’s super invested in this war, she’s neither boring or an asshole, in fact she’s probably the most important character in the fic after Lucas and Eliott. She’s badass and amazing and complex and if you don’t feel she counts as ‘good straight representation’ I find that slightly odd. Is she too ‘other’ for you that you would dismiss her like that ? Also, Basile is straight lmao. There’s plenty of straight people in this fic. And plenty of people who have incredibly different life experiences ; sexuality not being the main one doesn’t change that.

4) I do find it sort of silly that you reduce the characters’ reasons for fighting to being LGBT after I spent like 400k words proving otherwise. Like - Lucas wants to avenge his mother, Eliott wants to take down his father, Imane wants to avenge her father, Daphné wants to steal jewels, Alex and Emma are bored, Alexia’s a good friend (and also bored lol), they’re trying to stop horrible people from doing horrible things, their trajectories are layered and complex and if you tell me that can all be boiled down to ‘they’re gay’ I kind of wonder if you’ve paid attention to what you’ve read at all.

5) All that said, a majority of my characters being LGBT does have a symbolic point. It’s an opposition to the world of the Shadow, which is deeply sexist, heteronormative, homophobic, and macho. It represents how questioning your sexuality can be deeply liberating and often put you at odds with the general structures of power and oppression in society and lead you to question a lot more and find people who want to fight with you. Being LGBT can (but not always) make you more politically conscious and that’s a beautiful thing that deserves to be celebrated. And in general, being a minority makes you more aware of inequality because it’s simply your daily life. So it makes perfect sense that most of these characters who fight against symbols of horrible systemic oppression would be marginalized in some way or other. Straight/cis/white/rich/abled/etc people simply have less reasons to question the status quo. I have sat through so many action movies where all-straight heroes save the day ; I’m sure you can sit through the opposite for once. If you can’t, maybe it’s a failure of empathy or imagination on your part.

6) Imagine growing up and never seeing, around you or on TV or in books or movies, someone who shares your sexuality. Or if you ever see somebody like you, they will be a joke, a punchline, deluded, instable, doomed, or worse, a predator. Imagine the sort of damage that does. Imagine that when you finally find some correct representation, you have to make do with crumbs for years. Imagine it gets slowly better, but it’s still overwhelmingly tragic, or incorrect, or stereotypes, or only told after the story is over, or you’re always the best friend, always the minority, the point of interest there to educate, always there to struggle, never the epic breathtaking romance, never centered, never allowed community and to see yourself as the norm. In the best of cases, your identity is more or less ignored. In the rare cases where you find good representation, shows get cancelled prematurely, or your faves never get as much screen time as the straight ones, or storylines get botched because somehow writers think showing queer characters happy has no value. Imagine then you decide to take matters in your own hands and write the sort of queer utopia that makes you truly happy - the one where you’re surrounded with people like you and you don’t have to constantly feel isolated and otherized and you’re badass and don’t have to take any shit and your love story is the epic one that gets centered and you have friends who understand and share your experience. And then imagine someone, instead of taking a deep breath and going back to like, 99% of all media ever made, randomly comes to you and tells you they feel ‘betrayed’ because in this one paltry little fic you wrote, their mainstream experience is not centered like usual. Tell me, how would that feel ?

Again, I don’t bear you any ill will, but your message comes across as ignorant and very entitled. I am open to feedback and criticism but writing a story full of LGBT people is one thing I will never feel sorry for. There are a shit ton of fics out of there where those characters are straight, not to mention canon. If you feel ‘betrayed’ by the amount of queer characters in my fic, then I’d say you have some biases you need to examine. It reminds me of all the times I’ve heard people say that they ‘like gay people but only if they’re not too in your face’ (lol that was my sister, so fun) - this implication that queer people should know their place, never show their difference too openly, accept being a minority in all spaces, need to ‘deserve’ their spot, center straight people’s needs, etc etc...is deeply harmful and toxic.

If you can’t understand all this, then my writing is probably not for you.

[szivtalan]

Try to stop me from sending an abundance of asks aksjskshdk, back to the character asks, what about Riko and Takao?

I will never ever do that <33 (tw drunk ramblin)

Why I like Riko: shes amazing???? shes so??? SHE???? I mean aside from being really fucking competent which is just. a really attractive quality to any person ever, she cares So Much about her boys i mean she knows every team member’s individual motives and she’s really perceptive and caring and nurturing as well as just a bamf who will Not stand for slander I just feel like I’d be both intimidated and really fuckin gay for her.

Why I don’t: none absolutely none I love me a strong female character

Favorite episode (scene if movie): HWNEN HYUGA CUT HER HAIR??? THE PEAK OF TENDERNESS also i project bc im also the haircut friend. and the one where she forces ppl to promise to confess naked to their crush? that was the peak of the anime. AND KIYOSHI ASKING HER TO STAY!!!!!!!!!

Favorite season/movie: aah. ahahah. aa. I wanna say season 2?

Favorite line: all of em

Favorite outfit: the black top beach look........

OTP: any variation of Kiyoshi/Riko/Hyuuga i eat that sht up.

Brotp: RIKO AND IZUKI YEAH

Head Canon: she plays all sports really well truly. She could Wipe the floor with any one of her buff bitch boys.

Unpopular opinion: bruh cooking is a learned skill just bc a 16 year old girl can’t make a decent curry it doesn’t Mean she’s doomed from the start and won’t ever improve!!! fuk off

A wish: Kagetora stops being creepy and they have the best father-daughter relationship ever brought to screen pls and thank you

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: do Not let her leave Seirin they would be hopeless without Riko

5 words to best describe them: Amazing Breathtaking Showstopping Neverthesame Perfect

My nickname for them: r Riko..chan.....

Why I like Takao: HES TAKAO??? hes me & everything i want to be... a “supporting actor”, a shadow to someone who’s way more talented and important and main character-y than me but he’s still a really strong character and has his own struggles and demons to face but. to his core. he is a lover. even if he can be a jackass

Why I don’t: urghgh something something scorpio jealousy representation? like. it happens, but i still don’t like it being showcased u know

Favorite episode (scene if movie): his backstory & when they lose against Rakuzan

Favorite season/movie: we stan this sweet child in every season, boy be consistent

Favorite line: “I’m sorry Shin-chan, I don’t think I can comfort you right now”

Favorite outfit: he’s had a teal shirt on once, I think that slaps. I also appreciate his aversion to sleeves tho

OTP: how could i not say MidoTaka? they own my ass

Brotp: oh I feel like he’d have a lot of potential buddying with basically anyone. Can u imagine him hanging out with Aomine? dude i can. Kuroko? besties. Kise and Himuro? THE SASS

Head Canon: he listens to basic top 40s songs and love ballads Exclusively

Unpopular opinion: its more like an “unpopular headcanon” but I like to toy with the idea of depressed Takao

A wish: kind of like with Kuroko, to see his own potential and treat himself as a main character.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: do NOT separate him from his Shin-chan pls!!!!!

5 words to best describe them: ridiculous clown boy with the good hair

My nickname for them: This Asshole

[fanficparker]

Please a part 2 of Artsy Cutesy with the date. 😭😭😭

Haz x Reader

Warning: This is the cutest shit I have ever written. Tooth rotting fluff.

lol... I like nervous shy boys & they deserve representation in the community...

Part 1 link | [ MASTERLIST ]

"It looks good? Am I looking good? Am I overdressed?" Harrison buttoned up the sleeves of his crisp white shirt, slipping on the navy blue coat the other moment.

"You are just overreacting." Tom whom he especially called for just getting him dressed up answered, clicking his tongue.

"If she thinks I am putting too many efforts. I never wear suits. I don't remember the last time I wore anything that actually was not a loose sweater or t-shirt. If she thinks I am faking or something or she doesn't like this look---" Tom interrupted Harrison's rambling, throwing the red tie at him.

Who wears a red tie with a blue suit? But anyways he decided to go with it.

"Wear it because if you get late, then surely she'll not like it." Tom rolled his eyes.

"It's my first date, mate. All I want you is to be supportive." Harrison said, tieing the tie around his neck.

"Okay. You are looking great, she'll faint see you like this. Now can we leave?" Tom rolled his eyes, although he genuinely agreed with the first part.

He was happy that his friend was finally going on a date with the girl he could never shut his mouth taking about.

"I haven't done my hair," Harrison said and Tom rolled his eyes again, knowing he will take another hour.

***

Finally, they made it to the restaurant. Tom preached Harrison about how to behave at a date, already knowing he will forget his training. He left him at the table and drove back home.

Harrison fiddled with his fingers waiting eagerly for Y/n. They had been on a number of outings before, have eaten together a lot before, but never in a date...

What will he do? Dates are supposed to be special. He didn't want it to feel like a normal everyday lunch.

He was tensed until she tapped on his shoulder.

"Hi!" She greeted him with a smile when he looked at her, his forehead already sweating.

Damn, she looked gorgeous.

Y/n was wearing a red solid, deep neck silk top over tight black jeans. And she was definitely rocking the look.

Shit! Shit! He shouldn't have trailed his eyes on her from head to toe.

Would she consider it creepy? He asked himself, getting embarrassed. He haphazardly stood up from his chair, pulling the chair opposite the table as she got seated mumbling a little 'thank you'.

Wait... He didn't even reply back her 'hi'... If he replies now, it would be awkward. Sweat beads on his forehead were already concentrating.

"You look really nice."

Her voice got him out of his thoughts. He looked at her face, her cheeks tinted red from the little blush that crept her face and soon he could feel his own face getting warm.

"Thank you." He whispered shyly taking his previous seat.

"You look great... Bre-breathtaking." He stammered looking at her, the red on her cheeks already darkening. Her fingers traced the skin of her face as she tucked the loose strand of hair behind her ear, looking down.

She was adorable. Very adorable...

They ordered the food, eating slowly not talking much as they used too.

It was a new feeling.

She knew Harrison was shy enough that he won't do anything different on their first date and so she took in the initiative to make it feel like a date. Her hand slowly crept on the table.

He can hold her hand if he wants.

She wanted him to hold her hand, so bad...

"My tie matches with your dress... I mean your top," He said fiddling with his tie.

She smiled at him. He wasn't good at flirting, not even a bit but she liked that he tried. She liked that he was trying to flirt with her.

"We should hmm... Talk in the park. It's very formal here," She suggested because the date wasn't going in any direction. He nodded in agreement. Harrison wanted to pay for the full meal but she insisted to split it like they always did. She told him it's 'their' date not 'his'. A big smile appeared on her face when he agreed and he couldn't stop but smile back.

They walked around the vacant park and around the little pond trying to talk normally. They had so much to talk about before today but now they both seemed to run out of topics to talk. Fake, awkward laughs left their lips, their face flustered. She again tried to signal him to hold her hand by making her hand, brushing his hand ever so often.

Hold my hand, div!!! She screamed in her mind.

It was too much for her, she decided to do it herself. She slipped her palm in his, intervening their fingers. His breath hitched at her act but seeing her flushed face his heart filled with warmth and he ended up squeezing her hand ever so lightly. They continued walking in the park in silence, holding hands.

Harrison sensed her getting closer to him, she was mildly shivering and her lips produced little whimpers.

He wanted to do this so long.

Every time in movies or books when he saw the man offering his coat or jacket to the partner he always wondered when would he be able to do it... And that too with Y/n...

A smile crept his lips, imagining her in his clothes.

He was thinking too far. He mentally kicked himself.

Stopping his motions, he left her hand standing in front of her. She looked at her confused. He slowly slipped off his coat, putting it on her shoulders. She held the coat in her hands, securing it on her shoulders. Harrison watched her with a glimmer in his eyes as she clenched his coat around her body.

"We should go home."

Harrison bit his inner cheeks at her words.

Did he mess up the date that she wants to go back home so early? Was this gesture only romantic in movies?

He was sad now.

"I-I'll call the taxi." He said leaving her there, walking towards the road. His heart clenched painfully in his chest. He should have followed Tom's dating advice. He must have embarrassed himself in front of her.

Little tears formed in the corner of his eyes as they both took a seat in the taxi. Harrison sat on the extreme left, looking out of the window fighting the urge to cry.

He has ruined their date. He blamed himself.

He felt her arm taping his shoulder. He turned his head to look at her.

Oh. She had reached her home.

She got out of the car, him following behind. He closed his eyes waiting for her to say– I guess we should be just friends. And then as in every case, the friendship will never be the same.

But instead of her words, he was greeted by her soft lips on his cheeks.

His eyes shot open. His heart bounced when she looked at him grinning.

"It was an amazing night. Just be yourself, no need to be nervous around me. I am the same Y/n whether as your friend or as your girlfriend."

If his heart was bouncing previously then it took a long jump hearing the word 'girlfriend' escape her lips.

"So you wanna do this again?" She asked politely, biting her lower lip.

"Yeah yeah of course. I like you a lot." He said like a little child, getting flustered because of his own words again.

She giggled, rubbing her head. The coat on her shoulders was about to fall on the ground when Harrison caught it, his arms around her. He had never looked into her e/c eyes so close. Her eyes were so soft, her lips looked so soft that he bet— he could have kissed her right then if the taxi driver didn't blow the horn.

"Coming... " He yelled at the taxi, standing straight.

"Guess I'll take this." He said taking his coat back and running towards the taxi while Y/n looked at him grinning sheepishly.

Yeah, he will take his time for that perfect moment. If their first date wasn't perfect, so what, he'll assure their first kiss will be...

****************

Hope you enjoyed this :)

PERMANENT TAGLIST (Everything I write):

@acceptance07 ​  // @hollisellers2003* // @parker-holland-osterfield ​ // @osterfieldholland01 ​ // @jjasalem ​ // @zselenophile ​ // @miraclesoflove ​ //@yourmum792* // @maryosprinkle ​ // @crazyfreaker ​ // @practicallylivesonline ​ // @trustfundparker ​ // @emcsii04 ​ // @asmilinghopelessromantic ​

PLZ TELL ME IF YOU DON'T WANNA BE TAGGED!!

[crowleyisms]

𝓐rchangels and 𝓐dvents - Day 5 Fire

And on this day I have now caught up in doing @drawlight ‘s  31 Days of Ineffables after catching up with the first four days that had already passed. This is actually a lot of fun to do and giving me a lot more muse for the reverse au I have. It’s fun imagining my angel and demon in different situations to these prompts. So here we go for today.

Day 5 - Fire

Somewhere in Europe, 1832

It was a snowy evening at the large winter manor set in the middle of the woods. Surrounded by trees with branches heavy with snow and the chill air nipping at anyone that dared to step outside. Though there weren’t many who dared to venture outside at the current moment in time. No, they’d rather be inside where it was warm and not to mention the fact that a splendid party was going on inside the walls with plenty of guests in attendance. Many fine ladies and handsome gentlemen in attendance for the celebrations of the Yule Tide that was to be upon them soon enough.

Of course many simply took this as an excuse to enjoy a fine drink and well-prepared food more than the celebration itself.

In attendance at this party on this particular evening was a duo of friends. One tall and lean with fiery locks of hair that cascaded down in waves past his shoulders in neat curls and a ringlet that bounced over one shoulder. A nice smile on his lips with a drink in hand as greeted and conversed with other guests that walked past him. The other man standing next to him was quite the opposite. A little shorter than his counterpart with a little more roundness to him as well in comparison to the red-haired man’s lithe physique. This man didn’t seem to have quite as much of a jovial mood as his friend with more controlled smiles and nods of his head to the other guests but that didn’t really seem to bother either man none as they conversed with each other as well.

“A lovely party isn’t, Alba?” questioned the taller of the two as he turned towards him some more.

“I think I’ve been to livelier ones than this but it’s not too shabby in my opinion. Though any party is better with you around, Anthony, and that’s a fact.”

A light laugh came from Crowley at that, the back of his hand giving a light playful smack to the other man’s shoulder. This got a grin from the blond as he took a sip from the drink he held in his own hand.

“Aziraphale, please.”

“It’s true. Not making it up. It would be rather boring without you I think. Can light up a whole room and everyone would be happier for it. Though I’m not sure what this party is for again anyway.”

“Believe they call it Yule, Alba. Celebration supposed to go one for twelve days for the Winter Solstice and celebration of the return of the sun with the burning of what they also call a Yule Log.”

That got a curious look from the demon as he looked up towards the angel.

“And what, in Heaven’s name, is a Yule Log?”

Crowley snickered lightly as he pointed over towards the fireplace that practically took up the entirety of one wall in the large ballroom-esque section of the manor. Inside the grand looking fireplace that burned and filled the room with warmth was a rather large and perfect looking log that was darkened from char and glowed from embers. 

“That is a Yule Log. Really it’s just a normal log they get out in the woods but it’s supposed to be special and has some meaning to it. Show the battle between good and evil, Christ being triumphant over sin.”

Aziraphale threw his head back with a laugh that simply erupted from him without any prior warning. A hand shot up to cover his mouth as he got a few odd stares from his suddenly loud outburst. Crowley certainly wasn’t expecting that and it actually made him smile and get a laugh out of him too. It was like some sort of inside joke between the angel and demon as they looked over at the fireplace.

“The battle between good and evil? Christ being triumphant over sin? My dear that is by far the most ridiculous thing I’ve heard yet for human tradition. All that over a log in the fire? That’s rich.”

Crowley rolled his shoulders in a shrugging manner while taking a sip from his drink. He’s not the one that came up with the ritual and the symbolism behind it. Though he had to agree with the demon that it really was rather quite a silly thing. Could really say that about any roaring fire if you really thought about it. But whatever made humans happy with their thoughts and beliefs, well, he couldn’t really do anything about that. He was only one angel and has much as he could influence people, for the better mind you, he couldn’t affect quite literally an entire population of people try as he might.

Aziraphale continued as he made a gesture over towards the fire.

“I could think of several ways you could show such a thing. The battle between good and evil really could use a much better representation. A little more… flair I should say. I mean honestly a log in the fire…”

The demon shook his head with a light ‘tsk’ at the thought of it all. He wondered where humans came up with such an idea in the first place. It always amazed him as time went on what humanity could come with all on their own. From the most brilliant of ideas down to just plain nonsense. Aziraphale really did like to watch the development over the years and he couldn’t have chosen a better friend to watch it with as he nudged the angel beside him.

“Besides between you and me, I think you have any fire out beat no matter the context.”

It was Crowley’s turn to give a confused look towards the demon instead of the other way around. Even with the tinted lenses that adorned his face, the archangel was still able to give the most bewildered of looks at such a response.

“Oh? And what do you mean by that?”

A hand reached out to gently move some of the waves of scarlet hair that had come to block the angel’s face ever so slightly. Aziraphale’s hand lingered against his cheek for a moment before tucking the strands behind his ear.

“You have the most gorgeous and fiery head of hair I’ve ever seen my dear. Any human flame ought to really be put to shame.”

And oh how it’s true how gorgeous you are. I remember you in heaven too and how much longer it was back then like a comet’s tail blazing behind you. Always been breathtaking.

The demon thought to himself as he noticed a hint of pink had crept onto Crowley’s cheeks at that. That pulled a chuckle from Aziraphale as Crowley struggled to find his words.

“Oh you horrible fiend, Alba. You can’t just say things like that to me in front of people. I mean really…” Crowley trailed off as fingers came up to retuck the same strands of hair once again. Was it in an embarrassed manner? Perhaps. Or maybe it was more flustered than embarrassed but either way, it amused the demon to see him act like that.

“And yet I somehow think that you don’t entirely mind it so much when I pay you such compliments.”

Crowley rolled his eye before shaking his head before lifting his glass towards Aziraphale. Getting the hint the demon raised his glass in return towards the angel in front of him. A nod and a clinking of glass could be heard as the two toasted to each other.

“In either case to Yule tidings and to friends even if they pay such embarrassing comments.”

“To Yule tidings and to friends even if they turn a sinful shade of pink for such compliments.”

Oh, that one earned the demon a firm smack against his shoulder though he thought it was rather well worth it.

[plaggtastic]

don't wanna miss (a thing with) you

starring ladynoir + singing

read on ao3

like it? buy me a ko-fi?

prompt: husky

Ladybug had a nice voice.

Chat liked to imagine that someday, if she ever blessed him with her hand, that her voice would be the first thing he heard in the morning like a beautiful sunrise, nearly blinding him with its glory, and the last thing he heard like the sunset winnowing in. 

Now, he shuts his eyes, and allows a soft smile to dance on the edge of his lips, never quite appearing, only teasing.

Would they sing duets to their little children, and their one hamster? Dieu, the very thought of his beautiful, breathtaking angel singing a love ballad or a nursery rhyme had his heart soaring and for a second, he could only believe that he was Icarus, flying too close to the sun, yet hopeless and unable to stop himself.

Love was dangerous like that.

“What’s got you smiling like that, Chaton?” Ladybug appears, even more inspiring than the echo printed onto his brain, and offers him a curious smile. “Did you torment another kitten on my behalf?”

“I did not torment him!” Chat tucks himself closer, naturally drawn to her. “He was trying to scent you without your consent. I wouldn't be the gentleman I was today, if I allowed that to happen, now would I?”

Ladybug hums, and he’d been lying if he denied the knowledge that his heart squeezed over that sound.

Not for the first time, Chat thanks the universe that telepathy was only fiction, because otherwise, all his pathetic love confessions would be exposed for the entire universe to see, and most humiliating of all: the very subject of his affections, Ladybug.

“And, for your information, I was imagining the sound of your voice.” The admission falls from his lips, like water rushing from a chasm shattered. “I’m sure you would sound like an angel if you decided to sing.”

Her tone is a plethora of emotions, perhaps a little shocked with hints of elation. “That's where you're wrong, Chaton. I sound like a whale forced to do physics.”

“That’s an exceptionally bizarre comparison, one that I refuse to believe unless the whale, is in fact, a world wide recognized singer.”

“How are you more of a dork than me?”

“Someday, we can try getting you close to my level, My Lady.” Chat leans over, close enough that he’s reflected into her sky blue eyes, the ones that might have seen a thousand moments and dreams, and nudges her. “And, I don't know what you mean by dorky, I believe the word you're looking for is cool.”

“Dork.” Ladybug adjusts, a giggle slipping into the yawn of the universe. “I can't believe you're my best friend. You’re so lame.”

Chat frowns at her, a picture perfect representation of a meme. “My Lady!”

“I really can't sing, however." Ladybug murmurs, tapping her fingernails onto the flimsy balance they're resting on. “Unless, you count shower singing. Do you?”

“I’ve tried, but I sound like a cat denied it's daily bowl of affection. However, I do play the piano so when you do stop lying and admit to owning the most gorgeous symphony this world will ever hear, then you and I can start a band.”

“Chaton.”

“Ladybug.” Chat mimics, grinning at her adorable scrunched up face. “What? Is it a crime stating facts, now?”

And, then, in all her grace and beauty, Ladybug sings something in response. It's quick, only a few heartbeats, husky and soft, hardly allowing him the time to digest the essence of the lyrics but enough time to soak in the warmth bubbling from the tips of his toes, all the way to his glowing cheeks.

It's almost as if he’s dunked himself into a pool of steaming hot water, right after downing a specialized hot chocolate.

Perhaps, she had sang, in the hopes of proving him wrong, but the only thing she had inspired in him was an ocean of adoration.

It’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard, regardless over the fact that her voice cracked in the middle. In fact, that speciality only adds onto its perfection, and Chat’s heart is full of contentment, and of love.

Someday, she’ll sing him an entire musical, and the reveal will proceed, when the girl whose heart is shaped with kindness and compassion, bears a voice that cracks over the same line that his love did, and follows the miscalculation with an annoyed frown, the one he swears he loves.

Love, love, love. Truly, that's all Chat associates with his superhero partner, the one who's come to be more than his best friend.

For now, however, it's only them staring into the approaching path of potential.

“Are you blushing?” Ladybug asks, suddenly, casting him away from his daydreams. “You’re such a sap!”

Laughing, Chat turns to look at her, nearly combusting on the very spot when he notices her cheeks are flushed pink.

“Buginette, it is my honour to award you with all the prizes in the world because it's clear that you're an absolute goddess at everything.”

The only response he receives is a whine, and another forest of roses blooming onto his Ladybug’s face.

[brittysaucefanfic]

Acting is Easy, Loving is Harder

Summary: 

A new live action sci-fi/ fantasy show has been cast, Voltron. 

Included in the cast is the famous actresses Allura and Pidge, the famous actors Takashi ‘Shiro’ Shirogane and Keith Kogane, the famous chef Hunk Garrett, and the famous music artist Lance McClain. Throwing these five A-list celebrities onto one show can only come to one of three things. Beautiful Chaos, Painful Chaos, or Both. 

Throw in a romance, and a bad first meeting for some(two), and now you just spell out trouble.

Part 1 

(Next)(AU)(AO3)

VOLTRON CHAT ROOM

anon1: Did you guys hear about the cast for Voltron!? 

anon2: Uh duh!!! Allura, my queen, is in THE HOUSE BABY!

anon3: What about that mysterious guy, Keith? He’s so hot!

anon1: Nah, Lance is where the money is at! 

anon4: Do you think they’ll really show LGBT rep??? 

anon2: God I hope so! Coran hasn’t let us down yet!

anon3: Not to mention half the cast is somewhere on the LGBTQ+ spectrum.

anon1: Like our favorite soldier Shiro! I can’t wait to see the show! 

anon4: Gah can you imagine!??? Allura, Pidge and Lance in one show!!!!!?????? The sheer feminine power in one place, I’m

anon2: You know you put Lance in that group too right?

anon4: Tell me you can’t take one look at McClain and NOT see absolute female power?

anon2: You right tho

~~~~

INTERVIEW EXCERPT

Interviewer: Voltron has taken over social media, and the cast has only just been announced! I’m here today with one of said cast members. Welcome Lance!

Lance: Thanks, glad to be here. 

Interviewer: Is there anything you can reveal to us about the show?

Lance: *chuckles* Sorry darling, my lips are sealed on that front. 

Interviewer: Oh surely there must be something you can share? How about one of the most posed questions in the media? Will there truly be LGBT representation?

Lance: I can’t say much, but as far as we know for the time being, there will be a side romance for sure.

Interviewer: How about your costars? How do you feel about working with so many powerful stars?

Lance: I’m excited, I think we all are. Hunk and I know each other already, and I practically worship Shiro and Allura. I haven’t had the chance to meet Pidge or Keith, and I met Coran once, at auditions, but I have a good feeling about this show.

~~~~

Lance is in his element, soaking up the love of his fans.

Ever since the cast reveal, his popularity had skyrocketed. It's now the last show of his world tour, and then he's off to the set to start filming. Technically, the filming started two weeks ago, but he worked things out with Coran, his cast director. The others are only shooting scenes Lance isn't in, or are unimportant.

Lance smiles to the mirror.

He's really made it. No more will he be struggling to get by on his music doing covers and party performances. He's hit the big time, even getting to do his own world tour! And at every concert, his crowds just keep getting bigger and bigger.

He just has to do one last show.

Lance is pumped, ready to make this the best concert ever. He's going all in on this one, and he owes all of his help to his manager, Plaxum. Weird name, yes, but she's good at what she does. Lance checks his outfit one last time as he tries to settle his nerves. 

His eyes are done with a dramatic eyeliner, and he’s dressed in a fancy metallic suit jacket, blue with silver stars sparkling across the fabric. His shirt is a simple black button up, with the top three buttons open and loose. His pants are just a simple pair of black skinny jeans, the stretchy kind.

Lance dances out his nerves, stretching his body and getting his heart pumping. He’ll be doing a lot of dancing and moving tonight, because he wanted this show to be perfect. Don’t want to pull a muscle. 

There’s a knock at the door, and with a rush of chaos, he’s on the platform that’ll raise him to the stage. They give him a pair of earplugs and a wireless microphone, then Plaxum squeezes between the stage hands to pat him on the back and wish him luck. He barely hears it over the roar of the crowd, and they aren’t even screaming yet. 

With one last thumbs up, the above lights shut off. 

Lance stands into his beginning pose, his back to the crowd and head up. His shoulders roll back naturally and his feet spread apart to stabilize him. The lights above ease back on as his band starts with his first song, something upbeat and slightly repetitive. 

The roar of the crowd turns into a deafening scream and Lance eases in his second earpiece with a smile. 

The first song goes off without a hitch, and his adrenaline is pumping. His lips ache from how much he’s smiling as he takes a moment to address the crowd before song number two. It’s a full set for him, eighteen songs with two encores planned. His voice is sure to be wrecked on his way to the Voltron set. 

He does four songs in a row after song two, and with each one the crowd screams louder at him.

He pauses to talk some and get his breath back. And get some water, because the stage is burning up from all the lights. He catches sight of himself on one of the big screens and he almost winces at his sweaty face. His eyeliner is still on point though, thank God. 

“Thank you guys! Wow! There’s so many people here, it’s crazy!” Lance says, giving a little squeal for the crowd, who are screaming right back at him. He runs a hand through his hair, smiling as he waves at the fans. He reads out a few posters, and laughs as he sees one that calls him ‘daddy’, his face red. When his breath is back to normal, he starts singing once more. 

It’s crazy.

The crowd is huge, bigger than he’s ever seen at his own concerts. He does a slow song and the darkness beyond the stage lights up like the night sky. It’s breathtaking really, exhilarating. Who knew he would be here, with such a big turn out? Who knew those grueling years trying hard just find a gig at a sleazy bar would bring him here? Who knew he would be so famous? He stops to talk again after song eleven.

“You guys have been wonderful! This next song, it hits home for me, so forgive me if my voice breaks. When it came out, it helped me through my bisexual crises-” He’s cut off by another roaring scream and he laughs. “Hell yeah! Power to the gays! Anyways, it helped me in my rough times, so I hope it helps you too. I know it’s hard to accept yourself sometimes, but I’m here for you all.” And then he starts singing This is Me from The Greatest Showman. 

He throws everything into it. 

Lance starts out the song soft, soulful, his eyes closed as the words seem to rip themselves from his very core, standing still for the first time since he started the concert. Then on the first chorus he starts gliding slowly forward to the end of the stage. When the second verse starts, he freezes again, one hand gripping his shirt tight. 

His backup dancers, who have all been standing in various crouched poses, like they’re in critical pain, stand up and starts doing the exact dance from the show. Lance backs up as the chorus starts again and joins them, dancing with harsh enthusiasm. He and the dancers do the entire routine, and then when the beat drops after ‘I make no apologies’ he launches himself off the stage in a frontflip. 

Plaxum hated that part in rehearsals. 

He starts dancing the routine through the crowd, who are all screaming in his face and reaching out to touch him. He kisses the hand of a pretty girl before starting in on the bridge.

He makes it back to the stage when the music stops, hopping up with the help of a backup dancer. The rest are all frozen, reaching for the ground in a high crouch. Lance walks through them as he sings the slow part, his voice cracking on ‘this is brave’. When the first beat drops his dancers hit their knees, and when the music starts they all stand and throw their arms out like they’re going to embrace someone, Lance whipping around to match them. 

They finish the song with a proverbial bang as the lights go out. 

He does two more of his own songs, then does an onstage costume change while the lights are out. He changes into a sparkly blue tank top, with knee high leather boots and a fedora. It’s a small relief on his skin to change. 

When the lights go up again, he lets the crowd do their screaming. Then jumps into a cover of Shakira’s She-Wolf, changing all the female pronouns to male, and making the cover extremely gay. The fans went wild when he showed the world he had Shakira’s hips. 

On his last song, before the encores, he trips. 

Lance rolls with it, literally, using the forward momentum to go into a roll and then pops back up on his feet. All without missing a single beat or lyric. After the song he talks to the fans.

“Did anyone see me trip? No? Good let’s keep it that way, because it didn’t happen. Whatsoever.” Lance says and the entire crowd erupts into a roar of laughter. Lance smiles as he thanks the fans for coming to see him. When the lights go out, he does another quick on stage costume change. He forgoes a shirt all together. 

He also kicks off his shoes, and just does his last two songs barefoot and shirtless. 

In other words, his concert was amazing. Plus, he’s trending on twitter, with a very nice picture of him mid song of an encore. He’s barely clothed, in nothing but a pair of tight skinny jeans, and a fedora. Right before he walks off stage he thanks the fans one last time and then tells them to look out for him in a new show called Voltron.

******

(Next)(AU)(AO3)

[her-culture]

A Gay Icon Grows in Brooklyn: King Princess & The Queer Renaissance in Pop Culture

She’s been hailed as “Lesbian Jesus” and for good reason. Born and raised in her father’s recording studio, Mission Sound, in Brooklyn, NY, King Princess (born Mikaela Straus) grew up surrounded by music, and was afforded the opportunity to “f*ck around with instruments and equipment”, to see how the industry operates, and to grow into the rising (see: shooting) star she is today.

She burst onto the scene in spring of 2018 with her debut single “1950”, an affecting love song which the singer-songwriter has described as being inspired by Patricia Highsmith’s 1952 novel, The Price of Salt. “I was reading a lot of gay literature,” she explains “and that really stuck with me because it’s just a beautiful story, and I think what I loved about it was it took place in the ‘50s and the way that queer people were allowed to be public was so censored and it was all about body language and this kind of icy interaction because you had to hide yourself So, I was interested in the parallel between the metaphor of “1950” being how queer love looks in public and how it’s very similar to having a very cold relationship.” Oh, and she also wrote the hit song in the shower of her dorm at USC. She recorded the song in two days, and she hasn’t changed it since. “I kind of just held onto it,” she shares, “reassuring myself that it would come out one day.”

On social media and in interviews, King Princess is laid back and blunt, candid and self-deprecating yet utterly confident, the #coolgirl we all want to be. She describes her child self as “such a f***ing loud, obnoxious kid.” Underneath her frank, funny and irreverent exterior,  however, there is a quiet sensitivity; a poetic attunement to the small graces of life, which is given a voice through her music.

In June, she released her “Make My Bed” EP, which features six equally breathtaking tracks. In “Talia” she grapples with the heartbreak that often follows the swell of euphoria which accompanies romantic love, and which imbues the almost divinely sweet track that is “1950.” In “Upper West Side,” she re-imagines a familiar cultural clash and delves into the nuances and contradictions of romantic infatuation; it is a gay, less campy take on Billy Joel’s “Uptown Girl.” It is a story about the strained, and perhaps severed, relationship between a girl who lives downtown (maybe in Brooklyn?) and a girl from the Upper West Side, the kind of girl who, according to King Princess, buys herself a diamond chain and then tells her friends it’s fake. “I can’t stop judging everything you do/but I can’t get enough of you,” she sings, acknowledging how our intellectual dissatisfaction with someone’s behavior is often challenged by the far more capricious and unaccountable allegiances of the heart. There is something haunting, delicate and wistful about her voice, at once raspy and yet also angelic, ethereal. Every word seems to carry a weight that far surpasses its ordinary application, leading us to linger on each syllable with her as we are transported to a lighter, dreamier, more beautiful reality.

Perhaps most radical about her music is the manner in which it describes homosexual relations with the same authority with which straight songwriters have been exploring romantic love for, well, ever. This is a bold gesture in a hetero-normative culturethat demands that non-heterosexual relationships be defined by their difference, be boldly asserted as gay with a capital G, leaving little room for the meaningful reflection and oh-so-human messiness which artistic depictions of straight relationships are afforded.

There is arguably a similar trend taking place in film and even literature, in which art does not necessarily pose queerness or homosexuality as something to be appraised or dissected, or as anomalous in some way, but rather as a kind of certainty, as an element of one’s life that is as innate and undemanding of lengthy discussion as one’s name, job, hometown, etc.

Take Princess Cyd - an underrated movie you can watch right now on Netflix- for example. In the 2017 drama, we get to experience a young, female protagonist who seems interested in both boys and girls. Whether or not this is a newfound discovery is not clear, but it ends up not mattering so much; her sexuality is never discussed. Instead, the viewer has the joy of watching a young girl who accepts her sexuality with openness and grace, and able to her and the other characters involved.

In the literary world, we can turn to Carmen Maria Machado’s Her Body and Other Parties (shortlisted for the 2017 National Book Award). This genre-bending masterpiececonsists of eight stories in which homosexual, specifically lesbian, relationships are explored, and presented without exposition or explication.

The last few years have seen the release of a steady stream of this kind of art in which queerness is implicit. This is not to say that it is necessarily subtle or that it is peripheral to the heart of the work, only that it’s presence is one which does not ask to assert itself, it just does. We are perhaps moving into a cultural moment in which it is ok for not all content about queer individuals to explicitly revolve around their oppression. In many ways, the struggles  faced and the history of oppression of LGBTQ+ folks is so woven into the fabric of their experience and sensibility that the inescapable weight of these experiences does not need to be announced so much as felt and, as the adage goes, “the personal is political.” The song “1950” is a prime example. To the average listener, it may just sound like a straightforward love song about a lesbian relationship. However as King Princess shares, it was deeply influenced by the culture of secrecy and fear surrounding homosexual relationships in the 1950s.

The 20-year-old singer has alsocommented on the need for openly gay artists to represent their communities. She accepts the title of “Lesbian Jesus” and reflects that “I am obviously not the perfect representation of anything and neither is anyone else, but I do feel it’s important that we have people who say they are gay because there are gay people who aren’t bi, who aren’t pan, who aren’t just queer, who feel that they need people who are going to just be with women or men in television or film and music and relate to that.…Everybody needs their people.” It’s an interesting assertion, considering it seems to typically be those who fall somewhere in the middle of the Kinsey scale and who maybe less certain about their sexuality who are most underrepresented in media. But the core message is clear: We all deserve (and all of society benefits from) proper representation. I’m transported back to 2013, when Macklemore released “Same Love” and we were all kind of confused as to whether he himself was gay or not. This is not to say that he didn’t have the right to or should not have made the song, only that, perhaps the impact of the song would have been greater if it had come from a gay individual. While songs like “Same Love” are all fine and good, perhaps even necessary, they should not be the be-all and end-all of queer pop.

In just a few months, King Princess has established herself as the Gay Icon we didn’t know we needed, and fans are anxiously awaited her debut album as they replay the the six tracks included on Make My Bed ad nauseum. Now she is kicking off her “Pussy is God” tourand will return to New York this month with a show at Irving Plaza in Manhattan and another at Warsaw in Brooklyn. She’s also performing at a number of upcoming music festivals, including Governor’s Ball and Firefly. Check out her website for her upcoming tour dates: https://kingprincessmusic.com/.

[thesinglesjukebox]

ARIANA GRANDE - 7 RINGS [4.28] For the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone...

Iris Xie: Ariana, NO. Riding on the rhythms of Black artists like Princess Nokia and 2 Chainz and mixing it with "My Favorite Things": I am astounded at her dismissive fluidity between the verse and the chorus, and her blatant entitlement in the hook, "I want it, I got it." This is not the same way that Beyoncé and other artists have used it; when they say "I want it, I got it," it's not just for the singer, it's representation for all who need to seek power and strength in that message. This is a declaration of privileged entitlement and is only sympathetic to those who need to seek power in not being held accountable, in feigning innocence, in hiding behind privilege to do whatever they want without consequences. Ari's built her empire, and the discarded cores of the songs wrung dry for "7 Rings" is part of the plan for her expansion. The disrespect of Black artists has always been part of the story in popular music (and the world) and is threaded into the very framework and sound of popular music, but it's honestly breathtaking how obvious and easy Ariana is about it. It's brutal, it's self-indulgent, it's disrespectful as fuck, and if she decides to cast herself as Alexander the Great for the "7 Rings" music video, that would just be perfect for this song. [0]

Vikram Joseph: I really thought Ariana might be self-aware enough to understand how downright obnoxious she might come across in releasing a glorified flex about her gigantic wealth, but apparently not. It's brazenly over-the-top ("my receipts be looking like phone numbers") and I hoped, vainly, that it might be satirical -- her own explanation of the backstory behind the song makes it plain that it's not. No right-minded person resents her success, but in this socioeconomic climate -- oh, fuck it, in any socioeconomic climate -- a line like "I see it/I like it/I want it/I got it" is craven and crass. Musically, it's a bland, passable slow-jam, apart from the parts which exhume the decaying corpse of "My Favorite Things," which nobody wanted to see. Ariana Grande has called this a "friendship anthem" (because she bought rings for 6 of her friends), which reveals more about her concept of friendship than she perhaps would have liked. [2]

Alex Clifton: I know Ariana's described "7 Rings" as a friendship anthem, which on the surface is true; it's inspired by a shopping trip where she bought her girls friendship rings. But for a song about friendship, it feels awfully distant. The lovely thing about "Thank U, Next" was that it was personal and empathetic, exes named and thanked with grace in a way we rarely ever see in pop music. Here, friendship seems to be replaced with luxury; her posse feels anonymous, like they could be any girls in the club. The song's an absolute bop, making "My Favourite Things" into something sexier than it should be while also giving Ariana the chance to rap impressively. [7]

Danilo Bortoli: It was not impossible to see this coming. After the song that pretty much defined the social media zeitgeist in all of its lack of glory, comes the contractually-obliged, self-congratulatory victory lap which anticipates an also mandatory album rollout ritual. Meaning: "7 Rings" should be a mere filler. Not only because it sounds like Princess Nokia with less wit and bravado and more privilege, and not only because it evokes mindless "Pretty Boy Swag" comparisons (suggesting Soulja Boy's flow is not in public domain by now). No, "7 Rings" is bad because it strips away Ariana's empathy and replaces it with a bunch of meme-worthy signifiers: Breakfast at Tiifany's, ATM machines, retail therapy, all wrapped under a cold, soulless beat. Yet, given how calculated that beat is, you can tell cold was what she aimed. Sadly. Here, "I want it, I got it" is her mere wish, lacking the wit to make it happen. [3]

Thomas Inskeep: "I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it," Grande sings on this ode to conspicuous consumption, and while I'm happy she's doing well, it's hard to relate when I've been unemployed for almost five months. And the track, based around a chunk of the melody of "My Favorite Things," is nothing special. She's raised expectations for her music, after the quality of last year's Sweetener, so this doesn't cut it on multiple levels. [3]

Julian Axelrod: I hoped "Thank U, Next" would be the Lemonade to Sweetener's Beyonce. Now I'm worried it's Ariana's Reputation. [6]

Katherine St Asaph: Viktor & Rolf just released a set of comically expensive reaction GIFs, also known as their Spring/Summer '19 collection. You probably shouldn't continue reading this blurb until you've seen every single one. The dresses themselves are either nightgowns with epaulets or hyper-femme tulle ziggurats, like Mount Everests constructed entirely from bubblegum and Marie Antoinettes. The main details -- if you can really call something a "detail" if it's in huge meme font -- are emblazoned snot-slogans like "I Am My Own Muse" or "No Photos Please" or just "NO." So swamped in fabric, all the models look even more like children than usual, making the collection resemble Abercrombie tees or Nickelodeon tween shows, in all their oversassed questionability. But there's craftiness to the brattiness. Said the Vogue writer, perhaps with a slight whiff of "oh god, I really have to, don't I": "All the assorted typography and graphic design -- the text as well as the eagle head, the skull, the candy hearts, and so forth -- resulted from layers of additional tulle. Trite sentiments backed up by technical prowess." This also describes Ariana Grande's music: tart but frilly, meme-ready but warmly produced. Or rather, it's a description of her music since Sweetener and before this. For all the suffocating memesphere around it, "Thank U, Next" is a fine standalone Mariah Carey pastiche. "7 Rings" is a Gwen Stefani pastiche, primarily of "Wind It Up": garish showtune interpolation, slapdash arrangement, half-assed lyrics (being tied up with cuffs? Weird sex, but OK), and borrowed hip-hop posturing, as if her main takeaway from "Formation" was it being about buying shit. Can you even imagine how bad a fast-fashion version of those gowns would be? You can certainly hear it. [3]

Will Adams: Ariana Grande's post-Sweetener rebranding as an Extremely Online #queen is an instructive, if tiresome, example of how social media has blurred the lines between genuine authenticity and personality as imagined by PR suits. "7 Rings" does the same trick of "Thank U, Next" in that it attempts to reverse engineer memes as desperately as Katy Perry. But while "Next" was at least tuneful, this is a joyless cover of OMG Girlz's "Pretty Girl Bag," no more effective at fostering goodwill than a deluge of tweets that only serve to remind you that you'll never be her. [3]

Maxwell Cavaseno: There was once a time where Ariana singles needn't be based around their ability to serve as content and memes. That time may feel like years behind us but it was quite literally three months ago and yet is titanically irreversible. Now Grande's songs feel less like any real ability to showcase the talents of her singing, just more like suitable IG Story content based on an effervescent bitchiness demonstrated as "#confidence" and beholden to boringly cynical rap cadences. "Spend It" sucked years and years ago as a dead-eyed anthem by a 40-year-old pro making songs for 30-year-olds trying to hang with the 20-year-olds in the club. Distressingly, its progeny in "7 Rings" doesn't sound any less cynical. People can say all the critiques about the Sweetener run they could, but nevertheless that was a period in which you could honestly indicate that Ariana Grande was enjoying herself and doing her best. I'd be hard pressed to find such from material like this. [3]

Nicholas Donohoue: I get in fights over Ariana's message discipline. It is now settled law that "Thank U, Next" is the high point of Ari's career in terms of self-mythologizing, but I couldn't help feeling stung by: i) her releasing the song right before the peak of "Breathin'" (her actual high point of artistic expression), capping herself at the knees by cutting off one great point of personal vulnerability in lieu of addressing her less interesting public persona and, ii) by attaching "Thank U, Next," her tight construction of showcraft and narrative shifting, to a music video Frankenstein-ing four early 2000's movies with distinct tonal and subject conceits together. For as much love as I have for a titan of courage and rolling-with-the-punches like Ariana, I feel she might be careless as to what she transfers into her own sound and image. I don't know what "7 Rings" is suppose to mean. I have confidence this style of more showtune trap is an element of Ariana, but I don't know if it's a wise progression from the tuneful, honest, and numbly reminiscent take in "Thank U, Next". The money and excess politics over a spare beat are confounding mostly due to people loving it because they seem destined to never have it. This isn't even touching the racial critiques that Ariana is strolling where pop-based Black women have had to stomp (re: Rihanna and the word "savage"). Undeniably there is power here for Ariana, but who is meant to benefit from this, including Ariana? [4]

Jonathan Bradley: From the R&B undertones of debut album Yours Truly on, Ariana Grande has been a white pop artist who has attempted to situate her work in a racially liminal space: not black, and not even a pantomimed blackness in the mode of Miley Cyrus's less estimable moments or Iggy Azalea, but one nevertheless imbued with performative and stylistic cues borrowed from that cultural context. It's a position that is complicated by the proficiency of her baby-Mariah vocal, by -- perhaps unconsciously on her part -- the historically contested whiteness of Italian-Americans, by a debut hit that interpolated the Latino rapper Big Pun and featured a guest verse from white rapper Mac Miller, by pop's history of making African American ideas into mass culture, and by Grande's own political advocacy for civil rights causes. And alongside this has been her claim on a decidedly non-liminal gendered space: from pastels and ponytails to short skirts and rom-coms, Grande's image is underlined by stylized femininity. In her post Sweetener singles -- and even on "God is a Woman" -- she has used this to stake out a claim of maturity and independence, and, by extension, a distinctly feminine authority: "Thank U, Next," for instance, was a sugary distancing from the men with whom she'd been associated that asserted self-reliance ("her name is Ari") and professional success ("this song is a smash"). "7 Rings" continues blending girlishness with power, and like Taylor Swift on Reputation, Grande is making herself more untouchable by making her music chillier. She nods at Julie Andrews and Audrey Hepburn from the opening line on, and posits feminine solidarity and capitalist consumption as the enabling force of her dominance. Her flow here has been sourced to everyone from Princess Nokia to 2 Chainz to Soulja Boi, but considering the lyric, the likely inspiration seems to be Beyoncé on "Formation." And that rapping, the trap beat, and the nods to luxury goods combine to form Grande's most overt and most questionable tracing of blackness in her career. Conspicuous consumption in black music is an implicit challenge to systems of wealth that have excluded its makers; in a white context, it's just shopping. Grande's ability to sustain public goodwill in maintaining the tenability of these contradictions seems dependent as much on the sensitivity of her approach as it does on the context of the music. "7 Rings" makes more explicit some of the uncertain contours of Grande's music, but it does not fail: it is delicious in its fluffy imperiousness. [8]

Stephen Eisermann: I said this last year about Drake, but it rings true now about Ariana: it was only a matter of time before things got too problematic to ignore. Someone, somewhere will surely write about the musical blackface (as well as excessive use of bronzer), but focusing on the song alone -- yeah, this is hot. Ariana's coos play well with the trap arrangement and although she may have stolen someone's flow, she sure wears it well. It's a fun song to bop to, and I'm all for a good friendship banger, but ignoring all other circumstances for a banger is just irresponsible at this point. [6]

Crystal Leww: Ariana Grande's always made some incredible music, but the art direction and conversation around her has been subpar, at best, and oftentimes kind of icky! That first album Yours Truly was so beyond in how well it paid homage and tribute to the feeling of the late-'90s/early-'00s R&B pop. But there were accusations of playing into the idea of the Sexy Baby to sell records. A lot of this was super unfair -- Grande was so young at the time and most of this was projection by gross, older men who should have known better -- but this weird dichotomy between Grande as a really excellent musician and Grande as a frustrating image, brand, pop star, object of obsession from stans has persisted. "7 Rings" kind of rules as an actual track; Grande's created a super polished, slick product that pays homage to Soulja Boy flow while borrowing the melody and concept from The Sound of Music. But everything around this track sucks from the continued "borrowing" of Black culture (e.g., 2 Chainz's pink trap house) to use of "Asian" characters and urban culture to the insane defensiveness from Grande stans around all of this. I can't believe that Ariana Grande is going through her Katy Perry phase. [7]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: God, this was a bad idea. Everything here shouldn't work -- the metronomic synths, the unholy fusion of Rodgers & Hammerstein to Soulja Boy, the diving head-on into the murky cultural appropriation accusations that have dogged Ariana for a minute now. And yet despite all of these (entirely self inflicted) problems, Ariana manages to pull together the best possible song given the circumstances. It's still not good, but her sheer force of personality makes "7 Rings" into an object of fascination. [5]

Alfred Soto: It's not any more mediocre than her other mediocre singles, but despite the famous sample and rap cadences she sounds like a person visiting a childhood home she happily left. The home is deluxe but sparely decorated, and the wine good. Guests are welcome, especially Mariah Carey. [5]

Edward Okulicz: I've seen The Sound of Music a number of times that is more than I wish to admit here. Rephrasing the song so it's not about things that are believably in the life of an Austrian nun and instead are about things you'd go buy or consume conspicuously isn't original, though. Big Brovaz did more with this chorus and I think poor-shaming is a PR mistake. [3]

Tobi Tella: Sampling The Sound of Music is an inspired choice, and one that will always get the inner theatre kid on me on a song's side. But the chorus mostly leaves me cold -- it's a fun boast, but there's not much too it and I don't think hip-hop is a particularly good genre for her. When she starts spitting bars during the bridge and saying things like "gimme the loot!" I just get secondhand embarrassment. [6]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: The inversion of "My Favorite Things" is sly: there's no admittance of sadness, the things in question aren't quotidian, and Ariana's able to attain everything at a moment's notice. The lay person can't just fly somewhere to witness "raindrops on roses" or "silver-white winters," but everything that Ariana lists is a consumable product that's readily purchasable. Since she was never sad in the first place, there's no actual need for "simply remember[ing]" anything -- she's creating her list of favorites as she has them rung up. As such, "7 Rings" isn't a song about surviving the present, but it does implicitly acknowledge its potential for being unsatisfactory. The cryptic synths and sparse arrangement hint at this sad undertone, but it never quite gets there. And therein lies the song's biggest flaw: the lack of melancholic (sub)text makes this less interesting, and the display of opulence is frequently offset by Ariana's fumbled rapping. There's little resembling actual human emotion or personality here, but given her success with "Thank U, Next" and now this, Ariana is maybe more interested in being a meme. [3]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

[isthataraincoat-blog1]

Beth’s top 10 films of all time.

#10 - American Psycho ( 2000 ) - IMDb Rating: 7.6 - My rating: 9

A thrill ride from start to finish, American Psycho is a film which will go down as a modern age classic. This is something I can watch at anytime, whatever mood I’m in. Patrick Bateman is one of, if not, my favourite character in film of all time. The ingenius representation of callous charisma etches into the minds of people who watch this and really leaves a lasting impression.

#9 - Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone ( 2001 ) - IMDb Rating: 7.5 - My rating: 10

The first installment of the Harry Potter franchise is ultimately my favourite. The magic of watching this film when I was younger has stayed close to my heart ever since and will never go away. The introduction of all the characters and the innocence of this film will always be something I adore.

#8 - E.T: The Extra Terrestrial ( 1982 ) - IMDb Rating: 7.9 - My rating: 10

While we’re on the subject of nostalgia, how fitting for E.T. to be next on my list. This film made everyone want to believe in extra-terrestrial life, just to have a loyal and loving friend like Elliott did, and I was no exception. I grew up watching this film, almost every Sunday it used to be broadcast on television and I would never miss it. I still cry every time I watch it now, a film that will stay in my heart forever.

#7 - Whiplash ( 2014 ) - IMDb Rating: 8.5 - My rating: 10

Amazing. The word that comes to mind when I think of this film. One of the very few times I’ve ever been absolutely blown away happened during this film. I held my breath that much in the final 10 minutes that I could have easily passed out. J.K. Simmons’ portrayal of Fletcher easily makes its’ way on a list of my favourite characters of all time. Breathtaking.

#6 - Kill Bill Vol. 1 ( 2003 ) - IMDb Rating: 8.1 - My rating: 10

In my opinion, Tarantino couldn’t do better if he tried. I love every single scene, heck, every single second of this film. Amazing dialogue, moments of silence that are remarkably beautiful. A lesser respected film of Quentin Tarantino’s by others, the most respected by me.

#5 - The Dark Knight ( 2008 ) - IMDb Rating: 9.0 - My rating: 10

The best film of all time. Fact. Heath Ledger’s best performance of all time. Fact. An absolute masterpiece, Christopher Nolan takes The Dark Knight through every aspect of cinema known to man. A thrill ride from start to finish, every emotion felt, amazing. It is not my favourite film of all time but it is definitely the best.

#4 - One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest ( 1975 ) - IMDb Rating: 8.7 - My rating: 10

Are we all a little insane? Who knows? A film which takes us through every emotion, from happiness to utter sadness. Louise Fletcher is possibly the most deserving Best Supporting Actress Academy Award winner of all time. Compelling performance from a lesser known actress at the time. I would mention Jack Nicholson’s incredible performance but that’s a given in every film he’s been in.

#3 - Lost In Translation ( 2003 ) - IMDb Rating: 7.8 - My rating: 10

Wow. A film that absolutely shocked me. I went into it expecting to not enjoy it, but boy was I wrong. The chemistry between Bob and Charlotte is an art form on it’s own. A recent watch of mine, however it has made it’s way all the way up to my 3rd favourite film of all time and I don’t see it making way for anything else in the near future.

#2 - The Breakfast Club ( 1985 ) - IMDb Rating: 7.9 - My rating: 10

It is so hard separating my top 2, but it had to be done, so The Breakfast Club comes in at #2. I have seen this film countless times and every time I watch it, it feels like a new viewing. Every character has their own story, opinions, background, etc. And it is amazing to see these characters get to know eachother and realise their opinion of eachother was all a myth. Absolutely perfect film.

#1 - Psycho ( 1960 ) - IMDb Rating: 8.5 - My rating: 10

Ah, we finally get to #1, and we have Psycho. Alfred Hitchcock’s masterpiece. It’s surprising really, to myself, that this is my favourite film. I’m not really a lover of the horror genre yet to me, this is perfect. I see it more as a psychological thriller rather than a horror. I wish I was around in 1960 so I could experience the sheer terror of this never seen before type of film however whilst watching it I can imagine just what it was like. Hitchcock broke all the rules to make this film and I am SO glad he did.