#my wip is almost finished but i don't think i will have time for it in the next one or two weeks

[iapotmf]

i obsessively check my email to see if i got any from ao3 cause the tags i've been reading are dead rn (although! we got a few wusiala ones and like one or two jude/gavi ones) so i just read random things and hope for something 😭🙏

[keeps-ache]

oou light boarddddd

[arklay]

DIANA x ALBERT WESKER / template.

[heartfeltletters-written]

guys screaming and crying a new wip has entered the abi verse

[mariasont]

Be So Stupid - S.R

a/n: this has been sitting in my WIPs for so long and i finally finished it! now going to reward myself with online shopping xoxo

kind of inspired by when jj and reid split up in season 2 i think? when morgan was kinda being rude to her but i picture like season 12-13 spence

masterlist

pairings: spencer reid x fem!reader

summary: you make a mistake while on a case nearly getting spencer killed, morgan has some choice words and spencer is ready to beat his ass over it

warnings: morgan being a little shit simply for the plot, mention of spencer almost dying, spencer being a protective king pussy boss

wc: 1.4k

How could you be so stupid?

Those were the words that had been on replay, a constant loop, for the past two days. It's because, somewhere inside, you knew Morgan was justified in what he said. How could you have been so stupid to split up with Spencer at the unsubs house?

He was taken by the unsub, a trigger pull away from death. But the team got there, and he was okay. He was alive and breathing and healthy, and you tried to focus on these facts when your chest tightened with that familiar agonizing twinge.

It was a relief not to face anyone afterward. As soon as you got home from the case, you holed yourself up in your apartment, obsessively dissecting the events until the recollections twisted your insides with a nauseating sense of dread. You had run through every potential scenario in your head, agonizing over the grim outcomes if you hadn't arrived when you did.

You would've never forgiven yourself.

So here you were, hiding out in Penelope's lair, doing your paperwork. You convinced yourself it wasn't hiding; rationalizing it as a need for more peace and quiet than the bullpen could offer. You knew it was bullshit, and so did Garcia.

"Just so you know, I'm fully prepared to kick his ass on your behalf," she announced, swiveling to face her monitors, the ribbons in her hair trailing her movement like colorful comets. "It was totally uncalled for. Everyone agrees."

"Everyone?"

"Well, okay, not Spencer, but that's only because he doesn't know," Garcia continued, her pen tapping a silent code against her cheek, followed by the clack of keys. "If he did, he'd definitely kick his ass."

"I don't know about that," you said, repeatedly stretching and releasing the hair tie around your wrist, each snap a self-inflicted reprimand.

"He called you stupid." She was shaking her head so vigorously her blonde locks tumbled into her eyes as she paused her typing to look at you. "And you, my gorgeous friend, are anything but."

"Generally speaking, sure, but this time, Pen, I really screwed up."

"Who called you stupid?"

Spencer's voice was incredibly hard to ignore, distinct—you would recognize it anywhere.

Garcia and you stopped dead, your eyes growing impossibly large as she gave you a look as if to say, Morgan is screwed.

"No one."

"Morgan."

You and Garcia blurt your words out at the same time, your voices clashing in the air. You whipped your head to Garcia, the betrayal written on your face as she only shrugged her shoulders.

"Why would he say that to you?"

Spencer's steps towards you were measured, but each one amplified your unease, you hands wringing together as you looked away. He could read you like a book, and most times that was a good thing, but today it was definitely not.

"It's really not a big deal, Spencer," you insisted, pursing you lips as you dragged your gaze up and over him. "But how about you? How are you holding up?"

You were on your feet in an instant, a little too quickly, wobbling on your heel just a tab before Spencer grabbed your elbow. You ignore his touch, or at least you try, and press the back of your hand to his forehead.

He wasn't warm, but you sure were.

"You know, I don't think you should be back at work so soon."

You weren't lying when you said that. It seemed to soon. Was he looking a little pale? You couldn't tell. He should be home.

His hand was suddenly around your wrist, soft but firm, easing you away from his forehead, his eyes narrowing at you.

"Hey, I'm alright." He was trying to be assuring, offering a faint smile that only served to make your stomach do backflips. "Really, I am."

His fingers frapped around your wrist, not quite letting go, as he directed his attention to Garcia. "Why did he say that to her?"

"I'm right here," you grumbled under your breath, but Spencer was paying you no mind.

"I'm aware," Spencer answered without looking at you as his hands found their way to your shoulders, thumbs tracing absent patterns on your skin. "But you are not providing any answers."

Garcia cut in, folding her arms over her chest as her eyes pinned you with an unspoken accusation. "He said it because you two split up on the case."

Her words seemed to thicken the air itself, snatching away the previous ease as Spencer's expression darkened. It was a new and unsettling sight--the tightness in his jaw, the faint crease in his brows, and the steely sharpness in his eyes.

Without uttering a single syllable, he spun on his heel and strode out the door. You didn't hesitate to chase after him, an inkling of his destination propelling you forward. The look on his face had planted a seed of fear about what he was going to do.

Sure enough, there he was, just as you anticipated, in the middle of the bull pit. His gaze locked on Morgan with a laser-like precision, like a hawk eyeing its prey.

"How could you say that to her?" His voice was jagged, hands thumping against Morgan's shoulders in a way that you frantically looked around for Hotch. "What? Were you trying to make her feel bad? What's the matter with you?"

"Easy, Spencer, what are you getting at?" Morgan's hands went up defensively. But when Spencer's eyes flickered to you, the puzzle pieces clicked into place. "Oh..."

Morgan's eyes found yours. "Come here, sugar."

Morgan was your friend, a good one at that, and you really didn't blame him for what he said. He had good intentions. But here in the bullpen being open and exposed you found yourself stalling, glancing towards Spencer.

Only after he gave you a nod did you take that tentative step forward, clammy palms running down your pants as you stood in front of Morgan.

"Look, I was out of line. Calling you stupid was stupid of me," he started, hand grabbing on your upper arm as he spoke. "We've all been in tough spots and I was an asshole for adding to the pressure instead of helping you through it."

And you knew he meant it, even if it took Spencer nearly coming to blows to bring it about. 

"It's okay, I know you didn't mean it, Morgan. And it was my fault really, for not staying with Spencer."

"First off, we made that call together, so if anyone's at fault, it's both of us," Spencer reminded, his hand settling on your lower back as he moved closer to you. His gaze then drilled into Morgan. "And second, Morgan, she's too nice. I say you owe her a month's work of paperwork at least."

You opened your mouth to object, but Morgan cut you off, his hand on your shoulder stopping me mid-breath. "After what I said? I'll do you one better--I'll handle your paperwork for two months."

He was gone before you could even thank him, making his way towards the break room, leaving you and Spencer.

"Hey, look at me." You did, raising your eyes to meet his. "What happened on that last case—it's not on you. We made a call, and we did it with the best intentions. It's not your fault."

He regarded you so... softly. It stirred a flutter of goosebumps across your skin, your hands rubbing up and down your arms as if to smooth away the sensation.

"Seeing you in that situation, so close to..." You paused, drawing in a ragged breath as the sickening memories came flooding back. "I can't help but feel responsible. It's a tough guilt to shake."

He rearranged a lock of hair behind your ear. 

"It's a cognitive distortion to assume sole responsibility, but that's just your brain tricking you." Taking your hand he pressed it over his heart. "A human heart beats over two billion times in a lifetime. And every beat right now is telling you, I'm all good."

You could feel his heartbeat—thump, thump—against your palm. You caught yourself wanting to know what it would be like to fall asleep to the sound.

You were so close to each other now, the distance, or lack thereof, slightly overwhelming. "You're all good?"

He gave your hand a squeeze. "I'm all good."

You remained motionless, hand pressed to his chest, wondering if your heart could ever beat in sync with his.

taglist: @hotchhner @khxna @readergf @sarcasm-and-stiles @edencherries @aurorsworld @princess76179 @malindacath

[dustofthedailylife]

You were not supposed to hear that...yet

→��Masterlist || → Taglist

Pairing: Alhaitham x (gn!) Reader

Summary: Alhaitham reveals a secret about the inner workings of his heart to his friends over a cup of wine and in between some banter. However, he did not expect it would go this wrong...

Tags: Fluff, crack, comfort, teasing, consumption of alcohol (by characters), the whole 4ggravate crew is here, friendly banter between friends, a small sprinkle of angst because reader is insecure (but it's unjustified)

A/N: Dust posting a new fic?! Not an April Fool's joke, despite the date! Finally felt inspired and well enough again to finish this fic that has been rotting in my WIPs forever. I hope you like it. And feel free to hit me up with asks and reblogs - it'd motivate me greatly after my long break 🥺

The usual friend group of Cyno, Kaveh, Tighnari, and him - Alhaitham, was sitting at the Tavern. A gathering like it happened almost every weekend at this point.

The wine bottle on the table had been emptied around two or three times already when Kaveh ordered a new one yet again. At this point, Alhaitham had actually lost count of how many glasses of wine he'd already had, too. But one thing was for certain, he could feel the alcohol in his system and the warm blood that was rushing to his cheeks. All things considered though, despite feeling a little tipsy from the intoxication, he was still able to think clearly.

"Let me guess I'm the one who will have to end up covering your bill again?" He took sarcastic a jab at Kaveh. 

The man in question just squinted his eyes and glared daggers at him before opening his mouth in an attempt to protest before it was quickly shot down by Tighnari's hand covering it.

Alhaitham leisurely leaned back in his chair smirking to himself, training his focus back onto the TCG cards in his hands and considering his next turn of action in the game he was playing against Cyno.

"What, am I just supposed to take it all the time and be quiet?!" Kaveh retorted, directed at Tighnari. The fox's ears were beginning to droop lower and lower as his expression became more and more deadpan.

"You all know as well as I do that if [Y/N] was here he wouldn't be acting like this. He would be on his best behavior and pay for the drinks without so much as complaining or being so cocky."

"By the way," Tighnari attempted to divert the attention away from Kaveh's ranting. "Where are they? Didn't you say they wanted to stop by the Tavern as well today, Alhaitham?"

Alhaitham played his round, throwing his card Cyno's way before looking up at Tighnari again.

"They mentioned it but I suppose something must've come up instead. I will ask tomorrow."

"Isn't it strange?" Kaveh addressed the others. "Whenever it involves [Y/N] he graciously offers himself up to talk to them and seek them out but whenever someone else is looking for him he is nowhere to be found."

"Maybe you just can't find me because I simply don't have anything to discuss with you." Alhaitham threw another jab at Kaveh with a smirk, which was promptly followed by a light punch against his bicep by the blonde architect.

"What? I constantly have to talk to you already when we're at ho-"

"SHHH! Don't say that out loud." Kaveh hissed, quickly covering Alhaitham's mouth in panic, since he didn’t want him to spell out that they were currently living together. “It's embarrassing enough that I currently have no other choice, no need to add to my misery.”

A witty quip was burning at the tip of Alhaitham's tongue after Kaveh's remark yet again, but he decided to swallow it. He didn't want to upset him too much, especially since he knew he'd had it rough lately. Even if it would've been said in jest, there was no need to add insult to injury. Instead, he simply resorted to taking another sip of his wine with a low chuckle and a glance in the blonde architect’s direction.

“Aaaaanyway…”, Tighnari cleared his throat, addressing Alhaitham once more. “What is it between [Y/N] and you anyway? You've become quite close haven't you?”

“That's an understatement.” Kaveh groaned, dropping his head on his folded arms on the table dramatically. “He can't stop talking about them. Day in and day out it’s [Y/N]-this, [Y/N]-that.”

“We started working on a project about six months ago. Things are progressing quite smoothly if I do say so myself. Certainly makes things easier if you're working with someone who is both hardworking and intelligent in every way. I’ve been lucky to have been assigned to the project with them.” Alhaitham answered Tighnari’s question rationally while ignoring Kaveh’s dramatic display.

“Here he goes again.” Kaveh huffed, directing his comment at Cyno and Tighnari. “Whenever he talks about them you hear nothing but praises.”

“If someone is doing a great job, is it not logical to give them the credit they deserve?” Alhaitham added matter of factly.

“No… I mean yes, but no. It's just not something I'd see you doing. It’s so out of character.” Kaveh huffed. “And before you say anything, yes, maybe I just don't know that side of you because I don't give you any reason to praise me. No need to add that, thank you.”

Kaveh poked his tongue out at Alhaitham before taking a big sip from his wine.

“Why, if you want to be praised you just need to say so, Kaveh. I think you're quite brilliant - your shortcomings aside.” He just had to add that last bit. Kaveh was just way too easy to tease. And what would this friend group be without the playful banter and jabs at each other?

Kaveh choked on the drink immediately and slammed his cup down onto the table with a loud clang. A fire burned behind his crimson eyes when he spoke next.

“This is exactly what I meant, thanks for proving my point!”

Kaveh looked at Cyno and Tighnari gesturing in the direction of Alhaitham with a move that said “Do you see what I mean now?”.

Tighnari just facepalmed and shook his head.

“And what is your point exactly?” Cyno inquired, playing a card from his hand.

“Did you not listen to what he said?” Kaveh gasped.

“Not really,” Cyno admitted honestly, his eyes trained back on the cards in his hands.

“It's the fact that he can praise others too, but never without also pointing out their faults in the same sentence. Did no one ever notice that? However, he never does that when it's [Y/N].” Kaveh explained.

“And?” Tighnari and Cyno replied in unison, looking puzzled as to where Kaveh wanted to go with this.

Kaveh put his head in his hand and groaned in frustration. “Sometimes you all make me feel like I am surrounded by idiots.”

Now everyone raised their eyebrows at him.

“You're all so clueless… anyway.” He sighed dramatically and accusingly pointed a finger at Alhaitham. “This guy. This admittedly handsome but blockheaded, know-it-all, stoic, annoying-”

“Get to the point.” Alhaitham chided, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Fine, fine." Kaveh spread his arms like he was holding a presentation and Alhaitham his canvas.

“This guy's right here, as alien as it may sound – has fallen in love.” 

“You're in love?!” Cyno exclaimed his eyes widening. “With who?!”

Tighnari rolled his eyes, knowing full well Cyno hadn't listed at all the past ten minutes because he had been so absorbed in his cards, and gently slapped the back of his head.

“[Y/N], of course!” The Forest Ranger exclaimed with a huff.

Cyno, now rubbing the back of his head just ushered a “Wait really?” while Kaveh and Tighnari just curiously began eyeing Alhaitham in the hope of seeing any type of confirmation on his face. However, it stayed as unreadable as ever.

He nonchalantly took another sip of wine from his cup while leisurely looking back and forth between the cards on the table and the ones in his hand before playing another turn as if this conversation just now hadn't happened.

“So!?” Kaveh asked, almost hysterically at this point. “Do you intend to enlighten us?”

Just how had he gotten into this situation now? Alhaitham suppressed a sigh before turning to Cyno: “Your turn. Two of your cards are down.”

“Archons!” Cyno cussed, immediately attempting to go back to study his cards but a fist slammed the table harshly, drawing all attention to it.

Tighnari flinched in shock and Cyno, too seemed to be pulled back to reality. Kaveh’s hand was trembling slightly, visibly agitated.

“Stop changing the subject, Alhaitham. The more you keep avoiding answering the question the more I think I am right in my assumptions.”

Alhaitham pinched the bridge of his nose beginning to truly feel a little stressed by Kaveh’s insistance. The man was truly too nosy for his good.

“Kaveh, just let it be if he doesn’t-” Tighnari began before being cut off by Alhaitham.

“And what if you are right? What then, Kaveh?”

Everyone at the table fell silent and everyone was staring at him with a mix of disbelief and shock.

He hadn't planned to reveal any of this yet, especially since he feared they would try to become his wingman. Which, admittedly, may be a nice gesture on paper but with them it could only end in disaster. Plus he would prefer to deal with his feelings alone first and think them through thoroughly, before talking about them with anyone. Besides, it should be you, if anyone, who should hear about them first - alas he was too deep into this now to weasel his way out.

“What?!” Kaveh’s mouth hung open in shock.

“So it is true then?” Cyno inquired, putting the card in his hand down on the table, now suddenly fully hooked on the tea that was being spilled.

“Hold on. Pause.” Kaveh sat upright, before quickly gazing over Alhaitham’s shoulder. “So you-”

“For Archon’s sake.” Alhaitham was beginning to get annoyed because he didn't know how much clearer he had to become for them to get it. “Yes - I’ve been in love with them. For a while now-”

“Alhaitham-” Kaveh tried to interject.

“No, don't interrupt me now, you pestered me about it for the past twenty minutes now you'll have to listen. I have never met anyone who is so hardworking, intelligent, and stunning in any way. Of course, I would be infatuated with a person like them. It would be hard not to fall for them.”

“Uhm Alhai–” Kaveh laughed awkwardly before being interrupted by Alhaitham’s ongoing monologue once more.

“At first I wasn't sure about it but I am now. I am thinking about them first thing in the morning and last thing when I go to sleep - unless you're hammering away on some project again that keeps me awake, Kaveh.”

Kaveh waved for him to shut up already but Alhaitham didn't let that bother him. If he wanted the full story with all the details - he'd get it. He hoped that would get this discussion out of the way once and for all.

“And guess what? They even remembered how I liked my coffee just after I told them once and gifted me a book that I had been trying to find for weeks. So yes, Kaveh. I love [Y/N]. There, does that suffice now, or?”

Kaveh let out a squeal as soon as Alhaitham had stopped speaking but upon further inspection of his expression, it hadn't been one of excitement but rather pure terror and awkwardness. 

“Alhaitham…” Cyno and Tighnari said in unison and he only then noticed as well how their gaze was trained on a spot behind him.

“What?” Alhaitham inquired, curling a brow up in confusion before all three men pointed their fingers at something behind him.

When he turned his head around to look at what they were trying to show him, he felt his heart drop to his stomach for the first time in ages.

To his utter shock, you were standing right behind him. Or rather, you were frozen in place, your hand still half lifted in greeting as if you had just been about to greet the lot of them. Your mouth was slightly open in shock still and your pupils were but the size of pinpricks and transfixed on Alhaitham.

And judging by your reaction you must've heard every last word he had said.

“I-I…” You started stammering, clearly confused about what you had just heard. “I uh-, I'll head back home.”

You abruptly turned around on your heel and marched straight out the Tavern door you had just come through as if someone was chasing you.

Alhaitham hadn't moved a muscle ever since he had spotted you standing behind him and he looked like he was frozen in place. Everyone at the table had fallen so silent, one would've been able to hear a needle drop.

Alhaitham's eyes were still fixed on the door you had left through. The little bell that chimed every time the Tavern door hit it on the way in or out was still dangling lightly from the impact. But the movement was dying down slowly but surely - just like Alhaitham, who felt like someone had dropped a boulder on his chest.

You were not supposed to hear that, yet.

“You uh…, Alhaitham you should probably follow them.” Tighnari was the first to speak again. He awkwardly scratched behind his ears. Cyno hummed in agreement while Kaveh just sat there with his mouth wide open.

Alhaitham exhaled in frustration, unable to properly place his emotions. But they were somewhere between unsettled, nervous, and discomforted.

When he got up it felt like someone had tied heavy iron blocks to his ankles that were weighing him down.

“Yeah, I guess I do,”  Alhaitham muttered before marching off.

When you stormed outside the Tavern the cool evening breeze gnawed at your skin and made goosebumps erupt all over. Although you weren't quite sure if it was the temperature or your emotional turmoil at play here.

There was no way Alhaitham had just said that and actually meant it. He wouldn't be the type of man to flat-out admit that he had feelings for anyone. Or would he? He had been talking to his closest friends after all.

You were questioning your sense of reality and thought you must've fabricated it all in your mind. Or maybe you misheard what he said and he was talking about something else entirely.

But no, he said your name, and the others looked panicked when you entered the tavern and approached the table.

As you rushed through the streets of Sumeru City the chilly wind kept whipping in your face. Not even you knew where you were going at this point. You simply went where your feet were carrying you.

But eventually, you realized you had run up the Akademiya and to the blue-green mosaic pavilion that glistened in the last rays of sunlight. The spot at which you and Alhaitham often spent your lunch break together. 

You sunk down on the bench exhaustedly and stared holes in the ground.

No way.

There was just no way.

Alhaitham. The man you had fallen for so hard that he had begun to occupy every waking thought you had. That man was supposed to have feelings for you and had just flat-out admitted it?

No, this simply had to be a dream. A bad joke. Or maybe even a bet between the group that they orchestrated to prank you.

You could feel your heart thumping in your head and it felt like your head was swimming. It was as if you had downed an entire bottle of wine by yourself, but you were as sober as one could be.

Yes, that had to be it. It was a bet between the boys over one too many cups of wine and they had all acted their parts out flawlessly.

You got up again walking to the railing, overlooking Sumeru city that shone majestically in the last remaining rays of sunshine that the day had to offer. Another gush of wind blew your way, making tears well up in your eyes. Although it may have also been your emotions who were to blame for that instead.

You inhaled deeply. Once. Twice. But nothing seemed to help calming the rapidly beating heart in your chest.

In your daze, you completely missed how someone had quietly come up to the pavilion as well.

Alhaitham leaned against the railing himself, looking over the city in silence, too. He was clearly ringing for words. Although you assumed the wrong reason for his struggle.

“Look,” you began, trying your hardest to suppress the tremble in your voice. “If you came here to apologize - please, spare me your words.”

He looked at you opening his mouth before closing it again right after with a silent nod. His cheeks were dusted in a light pink shade - you assumed it was caused by the alcohol he had downed at the tavern with the others.

“I hope that we can go back to normal tomorrow and just finish our project. I’d prefer if we kept our distance after that. I think it’s for the best” The words left your mouth at normal speed, but it felt like you had to force every single one out. They felt tenacious, like old chewing gum that you tried to pull out from in between your teeth.

“I understand.” He stated calmly before retraining his gaze back into the distance. 

You both kept standing next to each other in silence for a long while before you decided to confront him about it directly. You eventually decided it was for the best if you got things off your chest now so that you could get over him quickly. Ripping it off like a band-aid would hopefully give you the relief you so desperately craved right now.

“You know,” you began. “I don’t know who came up with the idea and I also don’t care, no need to tell me. But you guys should never do this to anyone again because you never know how much it might end up hurting someone else’s feelings.”

Alhaitham stood upright and turned to face you directly. He crossed his arms over his chest and slightly cocked his head like he always did when he was thinking about something you said.

After a momentary pause, he asked: “What do you mean?”

“I mean that you shouldn’t toy with someone’s feelings as a prank. It’s never actually funny for anyone but the people who orchestrate such a prank. No matter if the other person reciprocates the feelings or whether they believe the statement, they always end up being the one who is being ridiculed.” You explained as rationally as possible, which was a stark contrast to the tempest that was raging both inside of your heart and mind.

“Especially when the person hoped to hear those exact words for the longest time, too…” You added. It wasn't more than an utterance under your breath - so quietly it was barely audible. But Alhaitham heard nonetheless.

“But I meant everything I said.” He stated matter of factly, seemingly catching on to the fact that you must’ve assumed the wrong things about the whole situation.

“What?! Alhaitham, please, there is no need to add insult to injury. You had your fun now–”

“No.” He gently took your hands in his, exhaling heavily. “Archons, you weren’t supposed to find out like this.”

He rarely swore which made the impact of his words even stronger.

“I wanted to tell you face to face and was waiting for the right moment to do so. But, just know that every word you heard and everything I said back at the tavern was the truth. No bet or scheme made me say it. Not that anyone would be able to make me say these things in the first place.” He sighed once more, giving your hands an emphasizing squeeze. “I meant it.”

“You did?”

“Every word.”

You felt the blood rush to your face and immediately lowered your gaze in an attempt to hide your flusteredness.

“Had I known this would happen, I would’ve told you everything right from the start. I don’t like how this went now but–”, he moved his hands up to cup your face. His beautiful turquoise eyes trained on no one but you. 

“I’m absolutely certain I like you. You drive me crazy. And I love and hate how much you occupy every waking thought of mine because I can’t focus on anything when you’re around. And when you’re not, you’re still always on my mind. So please – be mine.”

Do not repost, copy, translate or edit - © dustofthedailylife || reblogs, comments, and asks about Genshin or my fics are always greatly appreciated and motivate me! Maple dividers are mine - do not copy.

[kentopedia]

seeds of doubt

ft. dazai, chuuya, fyodor

summary — you don't feel like you’re good enough for them

contents — they comfort you when you’re feeling insecure about your relationship, sfw !!

notes — my other dazai wip is taking a while, so i decided to finish this one! i started it a few wks ago but since i’ve been feeling a lil down lately, i decided it was time for a comfort piece!

₊˚⊹♡ DAZAI

when you'd come home from work that evening, dazai had already known something was wrong. your usually bright smile didn't quite reach your eyes, your shoulders slumping the moment you crossed the threshold of your home.

dazai hadn't pushed you, but he had drawn you up tight in his arms, held you close when you breathed heavily into his shoulder, releasing all the tension in your body. his fingertips were soothing along your neck, massaging small, relaxing circles.

for the past hour, though it was nearing dinnertime, you'd found yourself buried in blankets, so warmly entangled with him, even when all of your hypercritical thoughts threatened to chill you to the core.

dazai spoke to you softly, asking you questions about your day for a while, ones that you refused to answer. you kept your eyes glued to the screen, watching mindlessly as a movie played, one that neither of you were paying any attention to.

that continued on for as long as he could stand it.

finally, with a sigh, dazai paused the film. he shifted, turning so that you were both face to face, his long limbs twisting around your own. limbs that were always so solid and warm, despite the iciness of his hands.

"kunikida told me what you said."

hesitantly, you stared back with wide eyes, jaw clenching. already, you knew what dazai was talking about. it was something that you'd told kunikida in confidence, because of all the members of the agency, you'd been certain that he was the least likely to spill your true feelings.

you stared back at him blankly, your shoulders stiffening. "hm? we talked a lot today. i'm not sure i know—"

though you pretended not to remember, dazai didn't let you run away from the question.

his lips fell into a frown, unamused. he drew your name out on an exhale, before running his palm over your cheek, across your chin, dipping his fingers into your hair. "don't bother. he's already mad enough at himself for telling me, but he hated how upset you were about it."

"osamu," you began. "i don't—"

"why did you tell him that you think you're not good enough for me?"

the seriousness in his deep brown eyes was so different than his usual playfulness, and you almost withdrew from them, curving deeper into yourself.

though, alongside the stoicism of his expression was something so melancholy, you found yourself offering your unfiltered emotions instead.

a long pause ensued. you breathed.

"because it's true," you finally whispered, your words wispy. "i'm not good enough for you, osamu." you swallowed when his face fell even further. "you're so smart, so handsome. you make me laugh all the time." your eyes grew hot as you felt tears at the edges of them. "i'm so plain compared to you."

"plain?" he repeated back, so wildly upset that you found yourself at a loss for words. "how can you say that, any of that, when i'm the one that's not good enough for you?"

despite yourself, you cracked a smile at his overzealous need to change the narrative. "don't say that just to make me feel better.”

"i'm not.” he frowned, his lips puckering as he held your cheeks, elongating each of the letters. "you're beautiful. inside and out. in a way that i can never be." he kissed the tip of your nose, smiling as you swatting him away. "i'm certainly not funny to everyone, either. i make you laugh only because i love you, and i want to see you smile." he kissed you between the eyebrows, then, this time laughing when the skin wrinkled there. "and i'm smart because i have to be, because i don't want to see the people i care about get hurt if i can do something to stop it." his expression softened at your glossy eyes, the way you slowly melted under his touch.

you let the words sink in, each one slowly chipping away at the doubt that had clouded you. dazai had never looked at you with anything but adoration in his eyes, something he spared for you and you alone, even when you felt unworthy of it.

"you could have anyone you wanted, osamu,” you said, the honest truth twisting something deep within you. “anyone at all.”

"funny," he said, tilting his head as he studied you carefully. "i've always thought the same thing about you."

₊˚⊹♡ CHUUYA

“i’m home,” you heard chuuya shout down the hall. he was always careful to alert you of his presence every time he returned, never wanting you to fear that his enemies had found his home, leaving you vulnerable.

you sniffed, some form of acknowledgement as you swirled the alcohol in the glass, pouring it down your throat. it burned on the way down, a buzz already at the edge of your mind, your thoughts slowing as you it sank into your bloodstream.

chuuya didn’t say anything more as he came into the room, kicking off his shoes and hanging up his hat and coat. there was a healed cut running down his left arm, a cluster of bruises on his left.

even though he’d gone on a dangerous mission earlier, he’d come home relatively unscathed.

despite your endless relief, it only did more to fuel your insecurities, the knowledge that compared to all his infinite glory, you were a lackluster, powerless no one.

you poured another glass, unbeknownst to the fact that chuuya was speaking to you at all.

“what?” you turned, the word slurring; you weren’t even sure what set of syllables had left your lips at all.

chuuya made a face as your head plopped down on the table, your eyes red from the tears you'd expelled. “is something wrong? it’s a little early for this, isn’t it?”

you stared at him, and though he was amused, you turned away, feeling the sour emotion of doubt lodge deep in your chest. “no,” you said in a small voice, turning away from chuuya.

he paused for a moment, his expression sobering before he took the seat next to you. chuuya held out a gloved hand, one that you could only see from your peripheral vision. “you expect me to believe that?”

“nothing’s wrong, chuuya,” you muttered, as sharply as you could in your current state. your arm grew numb under the weight of your head, throat sore from your earlier sobs. “i’m fine.”

chuuya sighed and took the bottle from you. even as you protested, every inch of his expression was so caring and delicate.

“that’s how i know you’re not fine.” he ran a hand over your hair, flattening it as you looked up at him from under wet eyelashes. “please tell me what’s wrong. i don’t like to see you sad, baby.”

though you wanted desperately to keep your mouth shut, you were too drunk to hold in the words. you leaned into his touch, letting the tears roll down your cheeks once more as panic grew in chuuya's eyes.

“i just think you deserve someone better than me, chuuya."

his brow wrinkled, and he blinked twice before shaking his head, puzzled. “what?”

you buried your head further into your forearms, unable to look at him any longer. despite your embarrassment, your lips didn't stop moving, releasing every little secret you'd bottled up since you'd met him

“you deserve someone you don’t have to worry about every time you’re away." you swallowed. "i’m not strong like you, chuuya, i don’t have any special ability that can save me from enemies." you thought of all the people he worked with, all of the ability users in the city that could compliment him so perfectly. "someone out there is a perfect match for you… i just don't think it's me.” you looked back at him, with teary, red eyes, right into his own sullen ones.

he scoffed, but his expression was gentle, open, fingers curling delicately around your wrist. "well, you're certainly wrong about that."

you curled yourself into a ball, resisting him, looking down at his knees instead of his eyes.

“none of that matters to me. i love you just the way you are. even if you were the strongest in the whole world, i'd still do everything in my power to keep you safe.”

you rubbed your cheeks, frowning as chuuya began reeling you in, grabbing you by the wrist to tug you onto his lap. “chuuya..." you said, hesitating as he planted you on his thighs, lips pulled tight in complete sincerity as he spoke his next words.

“i don’t care about anyone else. they could have all the power in the world, and it wouldn’t matter because they wouldn’t be you." he held you steady, one hand on your hip as he let the other caress your cheek gently. "i'll never want anyone else, okay?"

you nodded, though the sadness didn't dispel so easily from your face.

chuuya sighed, offering you as much of a smile as he could, even though he knew it wouldn't be a magic solution to cheer you up. "i'll remind you every day if i have to."

₊˚⊹♡ FYODOR

your hands curled in the water, tracing patterns throughout the soap and bubbles as your thoughts consumed you. it was just after midnight, but you'd woken up alone in your bed, full of thoughts that seemed determined to convince you that you'd never be enough.

though you'd gotten better at dispelling those dismal emotions, they dug their claws in deep this time. you'd crawled out of the cold sheets and drawn yourself a bath, hopeful that it would clear your mind.

fyodor had disappeared, and you weren't sure if he was in another room or if he had left your home completely.

it was quiet, but that told you little; he was always so silent, sneaking up on you with footsteps that never made a sound.

the door creaked open not a moment later, as if he had heard your thoughts. you didn't look over at him, but he sat beside the tub, his slender fingers curling over the porcelain.

"is everything alright?" he asked, his voice soft in the dim bathroom, illuminated only by candles and moonlight. "it's late."

you hummed, and contemplated voicing your thoughts at all. but you were half asleep, drowsy, and it didn't seem to matter what you said. the feelings would still be there, whether you voiced them or not.

still, you hesitated. "am i enough for you?"

you spared him a glance, and his eyes were wide, surprised by your simple question. a brief pause, before he answered, almost gently. "have i made you feel that you are not?"

you leaned your head against the edge of the tub, staring at the ceiling, the cracks in the paint, the uneven texture.

"i sometimes wonder if i'm just a hindrance to your plans." you breathed, thoughtful as he waited for you to finish. "i feel that maybe you'd be better off without me."

fyodor said nothing as you laid in the water, the temperature dropping with each passing minute. quietly, he discarded his clothes, keeping his eyes on you as he climbed into the tub to sit across from you.

he whispered your name once, but you remained silent, breathing in and out, trying to calm your mind.

"would you look at me?” fyodor asked, and the softness in his words was enough.

you sat up, pulling your legs closer to make space for him, even though he held your calf, drew himself towards you instead.

"you know that i do not make decisions lightly, and yet, i decided to share my heart and soul with you." he caressed your knee before letting his hand fall into the water, tracing patterns around your shin. you shivered. "do you really think i would have devoted my time to you if i ever intended on letting you go? if i didn't need you?"

"i know." you frowned, fully aware that it was true, to the deepest part of your soul. still, there was an ache in your mind, one that wouldn’t just go away with his pretty words. "but i can't help the way i sometimes feel."

fyodor smiled, his eyes crinkling ever so slightly at the corners. "i know," he said, and when he had you close, he dipped his head to kiss your bare shoulder. "but you do not need to hide that from me. i am here for you, always." he squeezed your hand. "i apologize if i am not always the best at showing that."

his touch was cold in the exposed bathroom air. "and when you achieve your goals, what will become of me? will you dispose of me, along with everyone else who stops being of used to you?"

"of course not." a laugh escaped him, like your question was unfathomable. "even then, you will be right by my side." he held your jaw tenderly as he forced you to look deep into his eyes. "you are mine forever, don't you understand? just as i am yours.”

dash is a teensy bit dead rn, but i want to let this one go so i can focus on my other wips <3. this was so nice to write though :))

[guppybibi]

Late WIP Wednesday ..

(aaa km not sure if i should finish this, it started off strong but just fell off and now my brain isnt working)

Simon’s home & marriage was his refuge, until it wasn't. He knew something wasn't right when you were coincidentally prepared for his return, all dolled up when you greeted him with an “I miss you” kiss. No, he was sure it wasn't you when he saw that the dinner table was prepared with a generous spread of food on it.

There was no reason for you to come this prepared, everytime he comes home from deployment is a surprise. So..how exactly are you this ready? It didn't sit right with him, the whole thing felt like it came out of a painfully obvious scripted reality TV show.

But food was food and after countless weeks spent eating barely edible MRE’s, a home cooked meal was all he needed. Sluggishly, he sat down at his unsaid designated spot at the dinner table. He closely watched if you would sit down at your designated spot, if you didn't; that’d explained a lot. You do end up sitting at your spot, it wasn't all that hard to do though. Dinner with you was unsettling to say the least, all of the small talk you were making felt forced, it’s barely been an hour and he already feels like he's going crazy.

He knows more than to question you upfront though, having gone through enough interrogations to know that he should take his time and that you could get hostile if things don't go your way. You could be a threat for all he knew, and it's better to be safe than sorry. Unsure if it was the right decision, he starts out some sort of small talk himself, asking you some seemingly innocent questions.

“What were yer up to while I was gone, luv?” He asks mid chew. “Oh not much, I just picked up a new hobby actually. Clay sculpting! I've been watching online tutorials, I could say I’ve been getting the hang of it if I do say so myself.” Liar, was all he could think while he subconsciously nodded to your words. You hated clay, not fond of the texture it had and the way it’d get stuck under your nails. Perhaps it was another one of your impulsive decisions, jumping into conclusions should be the last thing he should be doing. It could cost him more harm than good, so he lets it slide. For now at least.

“Sculpting eh? That's new, have ye finished any?” He pauses, swallowing his food. “I’d love to see them.” A spark lights up in your eyes, but it didn't look right. There's a lit candle in there but it's far, far away. The lack of life in your eyes makes his stomach spin like there's a guinea pig rolling around in their wheel in there, it made him want to puke. He wasn't the biggest fan of prolonged eye contact anyway, so he’ll just avoid looking you in the eye to prevent making a mess. “Oh yeah I actually do! They're already displayed on top of our shelves, I’ll show them to you after.” You exclaim, if that was you anyway, which it wasn't.

Dinner passed at an uncomfortably slow pace, Simon swore he could hear each individual tick and tock of the clock, the scraping of utensils against the porcelain plates and each chew you took. He’s gone through debatably louder things than this, the booms of the explosions were unforgettable after all but this somehow takes the cake. Wanting to distract himself further, he helps with washing the dishes which you normally did but you specifically chose today to help do the other minor chores. Water, that was your weak point. He noticed it, you didn't drink water after dinner either. What kind of monster doesn't drink water to hydrate after eating roasted pork?

To test out this thought of his, he decided to ask another question. “I'm heading to the shower, luv. Care to join me?” Meekly, he suggests to you, deep brown eyes staring intently as he awaited the already expected answer. “Oh I..actually already showered earlier dear. Maybe next time.” A dishearteningly dismissive reply, just like he expected. “Alright, suit yourself luv. I'll be back.”

He thought about it, almost forgetting about the bubbly soap running down his body from how deep in thought he was. There was no doubt about it anymore, everything about you being you, pointed away. At this point, he didn't care what the fake you was anymore, rather where you actually were. You could've been dead for all he knew, replaced by the soulless woman that now roams around his home.

This was beyond cruel, beyond the pain physical torture could've caused. It was like the universe was a cat and he was a yarn ball, being played by it meticulously. The whole thing was definitely planned out by a certain someone he knew, the both of you are fairly private so it couldn't have been a random person. He couldn't handle this alone, as much as he’d hate to admit, the situation was way bigger than him to do alone. So, he decides to call a trusted someone.

“You tellin’ me ye think your wife got abducted or something..and a doppelgänger replaced her?” A gruff voice questions, lightly tapping his cigar against the side of the ashtray. Price, him and Kate are the only members of the Task Force so far that Simon allowed you to meet. Well, it unfortunately looks like the sergeants won't get to meet you under these circumstances just yet. Strangely enough, the clocks inside the pub weren't working. Must be a malfunction. The masked man nodded, sighing through his nose when he got a whiff of the alcohol-filled air in the bar.

“I feel so.” He grumbled. “Couldn't she be just having an off day? We all have those, Simon.” John opposes it, it was an unquestionable possibility they couldn't simply ignore. “No, I know my wife. In my years of being with her, she's never acted this way.” Ghost hissed back, a hint of crystal clear impatience seeping out from his words. The lack of respect in his tone wasn't intended, but what could he do when his wife is apparently kidnapped and replaced so seamlessly? “I guess you have a point, but you need to confirm it Simon. You shouldn't make any decision on impulse, if the woman in your home really isn't your wife then this is a bigger issue.”

Then the plan was set, still a little all over the place but there really wasn't any time to lose. Simon would further observe the woman who's allegedly ‘you’ to make sure he isn't making things up, then if he was incredibly sure it wasn't you, he’ll head to the police and file a report for a missing person. In all honesty, it wasn't hard to do, having gone through missions more intense than this. Yet the fact that you were involved made the bugs inside of him crawl, this was totally his fault.

He didn't hide you away from the world enough, he should've just kept you locked inside a cage like the little birdie you were to avoid any danger coming your way. Simon wasn't stupid though, that was inhumane, you were one of the only few people who has managed to make Simon feel less of a ghost and more of a human. So doing such a thing to you was unethical and out of the books, but how could you blame him for subconsciously letting his possessiveness and worry take over when you're literally so far from his grasp? Being so near before that he could easily grip at the back of your top, now so far that the trace of your scent is long gone.

It makes Simon feel sick, his core being left to rot. He comes from the pub to what felt like an empty house, not home because nothing would feel like home without you there. He’d rather be living in a pile of rocks and plywood with you than in a giant mansion without you, that would be the real hell. “Bloody hell..where are you?” He murmurs under his breath, stressedly rubbing his creased forehead. If he could, he’d pry at every surface that comes up within his sight just to find you.

“I’m back.” He whispers, unsure if the fake you was asleep or not. Anyone, human or not wouldn't be happy being woken up from their slumber. “Welcome home, hun. You alright?” Looking up from your cup of tea, you ask. “Yeah, just spoke with the Captain. That's all, no alcohol.” Simon was so used to you being a worrywart about his alcohol intake, telling you that he didn't have any alcohol is practically ingrained into the wrinkles of his brain. But the woman in front of him didn't seem to care less about his health, let alone him in general. The lack of nagging that usually filled his ears to the brim didn't feel right, he would've much rather gone through another one of your yap sessions about how constant alcohol intake affects him in the long run than..just silence.

He feels the desperation inching up on him, eating him whole. At this point, he's willing to admit he doesn't want you. He needs you. He needs to hear your fretful complaints about him getting deployed, knowing you’d shut up because you were used to it by now. He needs you to tell him to include more vegetables in his diet because he's not some kind of carnivore to be eating that much meat. God, he just needs you with him. Whatever bloody thing came with you he’d take like it was on a stupid Black Friday sale.

“Not yet..” He’d think every single night, eyes wide open as he prevents himself from making a rash decision. The woman sleeping soundly right next to him, if that was you..But it wasn't, even if he stared at the unfamiliar woman for ten hours straight, she wouldn't just magically turn into you. Well sure, she was a carbon copy of you from head to toe but she simply just didn't scream ‘you’. Whatever and whoever you were anyway.

“When all is said and done, I think it'll end well Simon. My gut feeling tells me so, it's rarely ever wrong so I’m pretty sure we should trust it.” You ramble on and on, the little amount of alcohol taking over your lightweight self. Simon was still courting you here, yet he remembers it like it's been replayed in his mind like a broken record. He trusted your gut, and he could consider that as one of the best choices he's ever made in life.

But..trusting you now? While you're probably out, all shivering & teeth clattering from the immense cold night? Impossible, he’s fully aware that you're a capable strong woman however..how far can his trust go? How far do you have to venture into someone’s soul to gain their fragile trust, something that can be easily broken with your own bare hands? Ghost doesn't trust you, but Simon does.

“You're a strong gal, you can hold on for much longer.” He supposes, deep in thought while he flipped around in bed. The fake you hasn't set off any red flags yet, acting normal. Too normal. He knew ‘you’ had a purpose for being here, one with malicious intent, though what exactly? One wouldn't simply come in here and replace his wife with a fake one just out of spite, unless they were a little cuckoo. Tossing aside to check the time, he presses the ‘on’ button on his phone. Weird, the time didn't show up. Maybe it's just a glitch in the system.

“Simon, Hey? Simon, wake up. Hurry, you need to get up.” A voice shakes, lightly nudging him in order to awake him. It's your voice, he can instantly sense its meekness. With one eye and another, they flutter open, still full of sleep in them. “Oh thank goodness, you're awake! But you seriously need to wake up, like right now.” You crooned, hoping he’d fully wake up to the sound of your voice. Groaning, Simon sat up, a few joints popping in the process. “What..? Yeah, I’m awake luv. Whad’ya need me for?” He questions groggily, eyes opening further once he gets a closer look at you. It's actually you, he can tell! The way your eyes meet his, connecting like a bee landing on a precious flower. The way your voice lilted to him like a mother bird nursing her hatchlings, it really was you.

“Wait–luv? You're here? Bloody hell, you actually are–Did you see the other gal who looked just like you? Tell me I’m not losing my shit please.” Then you shushed him, convinced he’ll continuously go on and on if you didn't. “Please listen to me closely, Simon.” You pause, noticing how his eyes bask in yours like it was long overdue. “You need to wake up, hurry.”

[goosewriting]

Falling for you - Part 2

summary: part 2 of falling for you, where reader falls into the rottmnt world and comes across the turtle brothers.

relationship: Rise Leo x gn!reader

warnings: none! 

word count: 1.7k 

A/N: did i totally forget about posting the second part to this? perhaps. did a recent comment remind me of it? could be. was i delighted to find a practically finished version of this in my wips, almost ready to post? absolutely. sorry for the wait, hope you like it!

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

— — — 

Climbing out of bed, Leo silently made his way to the projector room only to find an empty couch.

You were gone without a trace.

Or so he thought.

Turns out, you had gone to the kitchen to get something to drink. You were way too shaken up to sleep after what you pulled. The confession had all kinds of feelings and thoughts going through you, confusing you further.

Leo saw you as you came back into the projector room. You were startled at his presence, almost dropping your glass.

The words from earlier echo in your head: “You are loved. You are worthy. You are a good leader. You are a good brother. And if I am still here tomorrow, and the next day, and the next… I wish for nothing more than to be by your side.” That’s what you had told him. To the turtle, you were a complete stranger. Ugh, you thought, as you tried to will away the embarrassment from your face that was resulting in a weird blush.

“You’re awake,” you said after clearing your throat. Leo didn’t answer immediately, and a slight panic started settling in you.

“Yeah, I’m- I’m just…” he stumbled over his words. “I also came to get a drink.”

“Couldn’t sleep?” you asked.

“Uh-huh…”

An uncomfortable silence settled between you two. 

“I heard what you said earlier,” Leo started, and you let out something between a sigh and a snort. With a shaky breath, you approached the couch which was your bed for the night, sitting down.

This is what I get for being so worked up over blorbo feelings, you thought bitterly. Why couldn’t I just keep my mouth shut?!

“Can I…?” Leo asked as he stood by the couch.

“Yeah,” you said as you patted the spot next to you.

After he sat down, you just sit there in silence for a moment as you sipped your water, then set down the glass on the little side table.

“I’m guessing you want an explanation, huh,” you decided to start. 

“Yeah, uh, what you said was very… specific,” he replied with narrowed eyes. 

“Gosh, how do I explain it,” you said, more to yourself than him. “So, uhm…”

You closed your eyes to think of a feasible story, cutting out certain points here and there until you landed on something decent.

“Let’s put it like this,” you started explaining. “I come from a place far away, and I've known about you and your brothers for a long time.”

Leo thought it over for a moment.

“So you’re like, from the future?”

“Something like that, sure.”

“How did you end up here?” he asked after a moment. You sighed.

“To be completely honest, I don't even know. I don't know how to get back, or if I can get back at all. In fact, I don’t know if back in… in my world… if I’m gone there. If everyone I know thinks I just… disappeared. Or if at some point I’ll get back there, appearing in the same moment I left. It will be like nothing happened for the rest. Like at the end of the first Narnia movie, I guess.”

“The narn- what?” Leo questioned with a slight tilt of the head. 

“Never mind,” you corrected yourself, and another silence took over. You cast your eyes down to the floor.

“I can’t tell you about certain events and such, but, I bet you have questions so, feel free to ask them,” you offered without looking at him. He thought it over.

“Well, you said–” A slight blush creeped up on his face. “–you said I am loved. And a good brother and leader. Where did that come from?”

You leaned back into the couch, draping your arm over your eyes and smiling at nothing in particular, if only the awkward situation you found yourself in.

“I know you think you’re the funny one of the bunch. Always cracking jokes. Which I think are actually funny, by the way,“ you replied, and your smile faded as you put your arm back down. “But I also know that sometimes you doubt yourself. And I just wanted you to know that… you're on the right track.”

Leo shifted slightly on the couch, and when you looked up, looking for his gaze, he looked away rather uncomfortably. You bit the inside of your cheeks.

“And look, I know this sucks. Some random person you almost ran over suddenly telling you all this. But I legitimately don’t know if I’ll just disappear one moment or the next, so I just wanted you to know.”

“Why though?” he asked, almost in disbelief.

“Because I genuinely like you,” you replied without hesitation. Your genuine response caught him by surprise, and he straightened up slightly, but then a little grin spread on his face.

“So, if you’re from the future, it’s like you have a crush on a historical figure and now you’re meeting your hero, right?”

You chuckled.

“Well, that’s one way of putting it.”

His hand came to his chin and he thought something over. 

“Maybe we just started on the wrong foot then.”

Folding one of his knees onto the couch so he could sit sideways, facing you, he stretched out his hand.

“Hey, I’m Leo.”

You smiled, taking his hand in yours for the second time that day, and told him your name.

“Delighted to finally meet you,” you added. 

“Always happy to meet a fan,” he said with a wink, and you chuckled at his antics.

“If you don’t have any plans tomorrow,” he continued, almost shyly. “Maybe I could take you out for a spin? And show you around the city.”

“I’d love that,” you replied with a warm smile.

“It’s a date then,” he said as he stood up, but realising what he said, he stumbles over his words to try and save it. You raised your hands to calm him down. 

“I’m not opposed to the idea,” you offered with a playful shrug. 

“Right, well uh. Good night then.”

With that he turned on his heels and left for his bedroom, leaving you all sorts of confused and excited for tomorrow. 

– – – – –

The next day, you opened your eyes, blinking a couple of times, disoriented by the unfamiliar surroundings. Remembering the events of the day before, you sat up on the couch, looking around to find yourself still in the lair. You didn’t know if you were relieved or stressed about it.

What if you’d actually never make it back home? Was this your life now, spending the rest of your days in a fictional world?

Standing up with a stretch, you made your way to the kitchen to join the turtles for breakfast. Well, “breakfast”; it was actually already the afternoon. But they’re essentially nocturnal, so you’d have to get used to their circadian rhythm if you were to stay here. The other turtles greeted you normally, so you concluded that Leo hadn’t told them about your conversation. Good. The less they knew, the better.

After some food and light-hearted conversation, Leo took you out around the city as promised. The first thing you did was getting new clothes, then you went for some snacks and sightseeing. By the time you were done, you were both sitting on one of the taller buildings of New York, watching the last sun rays disappear behind the horizon.

Your legs dangled over the ledge, with your chin resting on your arms over the lowest bar of the railing, and you sighed. No matter how much you wanted to enjoy this outing and time spent with Leo the freaking teenage mutant ninja turtle, there was this one thought hovering over your head, like a fly trying to land on your food. No matter how much you kept swatting it away, it just kept coming back. 

“What’s on your mind?” Leo asked after a while, already being able to read you like a book. 

“I just can’t shake this feeling of… I don’t even know what to call it,” you replied with a sharp exhale. “Just the thought that any given moment, you might turn around, and then poof, I’m gone, you know? I don’t want to just leave like that.”

“I don’t want you to leave either…” he said in a low voice, and you turned to him, eyebrows raised in surprise. 

“Wait, really? You’re not… annoyed by me, barging in like this?”

“No, I mean–” he explained with a lopsided smile. “It’s definitely weird, but it's not a bad weird. It’s like someone finally gets me, really sees me.”

Tilting your head to the side, you leaned your cheek on your folded arms as you looked at him. The half moon markings on his face seemed to glow with the very last drops of sunlight, about to be engulfed by the night and replaced by the moon already peeking out from behind a veil of clouds. The loose straps of his bandana swayed in the breeze, and you were transfixed by this image.

“Yeah, I see you,” you breathed. 

For a moment, there was a strange peace that washed over you, like a familiar soothing voice telling you that it’s going to be okay. Leo held your gaze just as transfixed as you, eyes soft, something unreadable reflecting in them.

The turtle was just about to say something when his phone rang. It took him a second to tear his eyes away from you, then he answered the call; it was Donnie, urging him to come back as there had been a break-in and they had to retrieve some sort of artifact. 

Your heart quickened, immediately thinking of Hypno and… the worm guy – what was his name again? – stealing the key, and you straightened up.

“We gotta go.” Leo moved to stand up, but you held him down by his arm.

He gave you a quizzical look, and that was when you made up your mind: whatever timeline this was, with or without Casey, you’d make sure that the Krangpocalypse never happened. 

You leaned in, placing a quick peck to Leo’s cheek, and his breath hitched.

“Hey, you got this,” you said with a reassuring smile.

He got up to his feet and helped you up as well, holding onto your hand and giving it a squeeze.

“Will you stay?,” he asked, uncharacteristically shy, blush evident, peeking from under his mask. “With me?”

You gave his hand a squeeze back.

“As long as this universe will allow it.”

– – – – –

A/N2: just to clarify, i know the worm is called warren stone, i just wanted to keep the running joke that no one notices him lol 

= = = = =

🐥 taglist: [link to join in my pinned post!] i took the liberty of not only tagging those in the taglist for leo but also everyone in the comments of the first part. hope you’re still interested in this one! and if not, feel free to ignore the tag sdfasdfg

@theoriginalmintyyyshake, @dybynyght, @lieutenantlashfaz, @galaxtic-writings, @Lovestruckfictionadict, @salty-s-r, @sleebykei, @miso-sopas, @duckanon, @wings-of-sapphire, @ashtheboookworm2, @xxnoxx, @crystal-crax, @lunaramune, @luckynesser, @rowaaaaan || @mocchamck, @warrior-girl, @moroneur, @powerauerart, @soulaansugar, @xnorthstar3x, @leafyturtle, @justmare, @the-cute-witchy-writier

[l3o-lion]

whooop whoop !!!! Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency is my new hyperfixation !

My boyyyy....... (adult (british) man)

i was drawing this while watching the show with my mum for the first time (for her, it was my second watch) and felt a bit cheeky showing her this as a wip knowing its from the very last episode of s2 hehhe-

progress shots under the cut after some rambling!

The process of making this was a bit different to my usual process - First off I actually started by adjusting the colours of the reference image, this made everything a lot easier and somehow felt less cheaty than editing the colours after i was finished with the piece, even though its basically the same thing just flipped. Then the main process was basically the same as usual, although I used a different brush than my usual beloved Habook Canvas rectangular brush. But while finishing the rendering of this piece I actually, for once, used a brush with a soft edge to smooth some edges out and sharpen other edges! It made a world of difference in making the piece feel less like one of those "make your photo into a painting" filters and more like something I had actually made that i can be somewhat proud of. :]]

i checked the project time in procreate and it says 22 hrs hehh- That is not a testament to the skill it might take to make a painting heavily relying on a ref image (without tracing) btw. Don't feel too intimidated by my slowness to try this if you want to!! I believe almost anyone could do this with way less practice than you might think, especially if you have a digital art program with a liquify tool to make proportional adjustments easier.

(liquify saved my ass- as you'll notice in the 2nd image where dirk looks weirdly buff due to wonky proportions)

Also im gonna begin reading the book as soon as my library has it, probably like within a week :]

[keeps-ache]

oh i Need cheesecake Now. or i'll die

[obihoebikenobi-ficrecs]

Twenty Poolverine Fic Recs - #1

November 3rd, 2024

In not particular order, I'll be making a fic rec of 20 poolverine fics per week from now through the end of December to highlight some of my favorites. Please make sure you note the tags on ao3 before reading!

Completed Fics

Promise Me We’ll Be Back In Time - fanficbug, E, 108K

time loop, angst, getting together

I think the author says it best in their summary: "The one where Wade gets stuck in a time loop and decides to play 50 First Dates." This fic is a well-rounded masterpiece, and absolutely beautifully fleshes out this concept. This is easily one of the best fanfics I've read in years. Millions of kudos.

where soul meets body - Edgebug - E, 33.8K words

mind-sharing, hurt/comfort, getting together, mind sex

This is my absolute favorite finished poolverine longfic. It's set after the events of DPW and expands into the wildest, most perfectly deadpool-esque chain of events. This is a perfect fic, I beg of you to read it.

second nature to me now - Edgebug - E, 36.8K words

casefic, fake/pretend relationship, angst with a happy ending

As with all of edgbug's fics, this was absolutely phenomenal. I love the fake relationship trope, and this almost feels like an episode of psych with the humorous crime solving premise. Read it in one sitting and have read it twice since. Don't pass up on this one!

Dangling Like a Thread - CenturyUnited - T, 6.5K words

self-harm, mute Wade, non-graphic sex, emotion hurt/comfort

In this one, Wade loses his voice and learns how to communicate with Logan. Very sweet fic, love the characterizations of both Wade and Logan in this one.

It’s not me, it’s you. It’s more than I can chew. - sandiazucar - T, 6.1K words

hurt/comfort, emotional hurt/comfort, nightmares, Wade whump

Logan hurts Wade while having a nightmare and Wade has to take a break. Emotionally devastating in the best way possible.

like a dog with a bird at your door - midnightdragons - T, 2K words

domestic fluff, cuddling, chronic pain, hurt Logan

His adamantium bones make Logan cold in the winter and Wade helps him out. So perfectly sweet, I love this short little fic.

Not this time, peanut - peach_flavour - E, 6.3K words

insecure Logan, angst, alcohol abuse, emotionally repressed men

More angst guys, I can't help myself. This author characterizes them so well, I've read this several times.

happiness (like a bullet in the back) - handfulofteeth (s0norus) - E, 15.5K words

domestic fluff, chronic pain, bathing/washing, bottom Wade, top Logan, praise kink, dacryphilia

This 5+1 fic is soft and hot and good as fuck. Amazing writing and characterizations.

WIPS

Mr. Forgettable - Arwriter - M, 21.1K words, 4/? chapters

hurt/comfort, temporary amnesia, getting together

This fic is my absolute favorite WIP right now. Logan suffers a head injury and starts experiencing gaps in his memory and active memory loss. Absolutely delicious whump and great writing!

Don't Want To Be A Fool For You - HeavensAche - E, 45.5K words, 2/3 chapters

getting together, bartender Logan, panic attacks, PTSD

Logan works through living in a new timeline and his anger issues. Super well-written and a captivating read!

unhappy man syndrome - gossippool (fearandhatred) - no rating, 15.5K words, 4/8 chapters

Wade has chronic pain, hurt/comfort, nightmares, angst

This one is so angsty (for both Logan and Wade) and perfect. Please, please give it a read.

It's Just Chemistry - farmhandler - E, 23.8K words, 4/5 chapters

Logan and Wade whump, hurt/comfort, feral Logan, established relationship

Logan rejoins the X-men and their first mission goes wrong when Logan gets accidentally dosed with a toxin. Very whumpy and emotionally painful which is my absolute favorite. The author writes beautifully, and I adore the premise.

Hellraiser, Heartbreaker - prettyponyridetohell - E, 6.6K words, 2/6 chapters

jealous Logan (worst wolverine), references to X-men movies

Logan and Wade annnnd young cagefighter Logan appear in this fic. I suggest you just go and read it immediately, it's that fucking good.

SMUT/PWP

like the summer into rough hands - Edgebug - E, 3.1K words

claw/hand kink, coming untouched

Missionary’s Downfall - thewinkitty - E, 14.4K

sex pollen, trans Logan, breeding kink Hither, Hither, Love - phantasmagorical_rilianne - E, 4.5K words

light dom/sub, bottom Logan, angst, fluff and smut

The Urge (Is So Demanding) - sterlingstars - E, 4.2K

piss kink, established relationship, bottom Logan

Can't Sweat It Out - RatFlavored - E, 8.3K words

bottom Logan, service top Wade, rimming, overstimulation, multiple orgasms

black irises in the sunshine - handfulofteeth (s0norus) - E, 16.6K

bottom Logan, insecure Logan, panty sniffing, subspace, praise kink

guess - handfulofteeth (s0norus) - E, 16.2K words

Wade in panties, Logan has a praise kink, power bottom Wade, puppy play, blood kink

[chimindity]

Stepbro!rafe x reader

"exhausting day"

You come home frow work exhausted, having such a bad day the only thing you want is to lay down on your bed and get rid of your frustration.

It was already past midnight, since you work as a barmaid you always finish late at night, usually you don't really mind it, but this night was one of the worst, you almost got fired when a group of men came to you and kept asking inappropriate questions, you started to get angry, which is pretty normal until your boss comes and tells you to go serve them but you didn't want to, affraid of what they could do, so you just skipped their order.

Your boss noticed it and almost made you cry infront of everyone telling you how bad you are as a barmaid.

As you walk into your room you start undressing yourself changing into more comfortable clothes, choosing a baby pink nightgown.

Switching on the light on your vanity you sit down and sigh, being too tired to even remove your makeup so you take a cotton disk and start wipping off your mascara.

A few seconds later it still hasn't come off, looking at yourself, eyebrows furrowing on the mirror you sigh again this time louder.

You throw in anger the dirty cotton disk, almost dropping everything from the vanity, as you burst out in tears, your face hiding behind your hands you don't hear your step brother walking in your room.

-"shit you gonna wake the whole neighborhood up if you keep yelling like that" his sudden voice gets closer making you jolt, but it only makes you sob harder feeling not understood, not even by your step brother.

-"hey what'd i just tell ya?" He frowns gently nudging your shoulder, as you look up at him, your smudged mascara under your eyes make his cock throbs in his shorts, seeing you in this vulnerable state.

-"I just can't remove my mascara" you sniff handing him a cotton disk he looks down at it, giving you a confusing look.

-"what the hell am I supposed to do with that uh?" He huffs poiting at it, causes you to roll you eyes at his reaction.

-"I have a bad day and uh i just need to sleep and i feel overwhelmed" you whine throwing your hands dramatically in the air, not paying too much attention to Rafe while his smirks widens on his face, he grabs your forearm pulling you on his laps facing him as he sits down on the edge of your bed.

-"a'light, let me take care of you, uh why don't you let me do all the thinking for you a'right?" He starts getting flustrasted as he feels the silkness of your nightgown on his thighs, not expecting it to be this close.

You simply nodd your head, being exhausted at this point to even speak, he gently rubs your eye trying to remove the makeup as you sight a little bit of his tongue between his lip, you never noticed his habits as a sign of concentration.

But you find it extremely hot, until he catches you guard off admiring his face, -"stop looking at me like that" he grabs your face with his other hand, squeezing your cheeks.

-"where am I suppose to look then?" You squirm on his laps making him grab them firmly, as you start feeling something poking your inner thighs, but you don't really pay attention.

-"hey, hey look at me" his tone softens and his eyes don't leave yours, bouncing his lap as if he was trying to comfort a toddler, and somehow it works.

-"there we go, now what don't you let me make you feel better?" He doesn't let you have time to reply, he lifts you up under your armpits and turn you the other side, so your back is now pressed against his torso.

You tilt your head confusedly, when you feel your hips being lifted up and down repeatedly you grip his laps to keep you still.

-"rafey?" A whimper comes out as you feel his boner rubbing against your ass cheeks, your cheeks immediately redden when you realize it, and try to pull away from his grip.

-"shhh, don't you trust your big brother? Here take off your shorts" you are taken back by his demand, but after all you trust him cause he always told you that he knows better.

Still sitting on his laps, you try to slide down your pink nightgown when you hear him sighs behind you, his hands grips and pull down your shorts quickly.

-"do I have to do everything?" He huffs as his eyes glance at your puffy cunt all swollen from the friction, which causes him to smirk.

He pulls you closer in his laps wrapping his arms around your body, his hand reaching your private part making you squirm in his grip as he starts touching your clit.

-"rafe! This is wrong, we just we can't do this!" You cling at his forearms trying to get away from his laps but it only make him tighter his grip.

-"stop, i'm being really nice so fucking be grateful" the more he is beind rude the more he is being turned on, after he has enough of you squirming, he lifts you legs up pressed against your chest.

-"what'd i tell you uh? Stop moving" his pace gets faster as you soak his fingers causing you to moan, your eyes widen at the noise you just made and you hide your face out of embarrasment.

-"nah nah none of that" he smirks and pulls your hands away from your face, feeling a warm feeling in your lower stomach you start getting worried.

-"rafe! S-something's wrong uh" you hiccup trying to speak as the pleasure overwhelm you, Rafe knew what's happening to you just by the way you squirm and moans.

-"I know, I know just let it out 'kay?" He keeps rubbing your clit as you close your eyes and moan louder feeling your clímax getting closer.

-"fuck Rafey! R-rafe" you're whining his name being out of breath, your eyes become heavier than earlier you feel a light spank on your cheek.

-"hey wake up sis, I gotta clean you up lay down on the bed" he helps you stand up and walks out of the room, you lay down on the bed slowly drifting off.

-"didn't know I would be the first to give you an orgasm" he mumbles to himself as he walks back in your room watching you sleeping already, getting closer to you and gently clean you.

After he was done, he gets back in his room with a hard on ready to blow his load as soon as his eyes lands on your pretty face smudged mascara under your eyes, he was sick and he knew it but your obliviousness makes you adorable he couldn't help it.

Taglist

@nemesyaaa @starkeysprincess @sadfury

[bamsara]

A03 Questions Tag Game

I got tagged by: @kagedbird I tag: @onethirdofimpossible, @coffincrows, (first two that come to mind) and anyone else who wants to do the game

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

At the time of writing this post, currently 30 fics. (Not including any fics or written works that are not posted to AO3)

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

1,066,633

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

Formerly: Don't Starve, FNAF, Dragons Dogma, Invader Zim

Currently: Cult of the Lamb

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

Solar Lunacy, Celestial Omens, Bytes of Lunacy, The Rehabilitation of Death, Saturday Insomnia

5 – Do you respond to comments?

I try to but I also get very nervous responding because I often don't know what to say back and I feel like it's almost rude or disrespectful to respond to a comment, esp the very nice ones that are long and in-deph with just a keysmash or a bunch of emojis, but I do read every single one since I have email notifications on for them

I'd like to sit down and respond to many but I really don't want to make it awkward so pls dear god readers forgive me

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't like unhappy endings. I enjoy angsty stories but I like when it's at least ending happy to me

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Not posted? Solar Lunacy

Ongoing? TROD

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

Not really? Most adults (in my experience) know the 'don't like don't read' rule and know basic online etiquette. I've gotten some for discontinuing a fic or switching fandoms though

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't write or draw NSFW! I like to make some suggestive themes sometimes, but I'm a very ace person, it's not something I do often. (I do have a current running goal that if my friend reaches their donation goal for their medical bills that I would give NSFW a shot, but again its not really my cup of tea)

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nah I haven't written any cross overs, but I do draw them sometimes. Recently I've been spinning a Alice in Wonderland x COTL crossover in my head.

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yep. I've had people copy and paste my work, go in with a thesaurus to change a few words (like changing 'angry' to mad, 'upset' to 'sad', and so forth) to try and avoid detection and re-posted my written work under a different title name. AO3 staff took them down for violating their policy against plagiarism though

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I wouldn't mind it so as long as I'm asked before hand, though not on anon so I can actually work with the person to prevent any mistranslations or mishandling, and that I don't want my work posted to other websites

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

I think I did when I was a teen but I cannot remember now

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

Eh I don't have any favorites, just ones I really focus on for a long while

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Pass.

16 – What are your writing strengths?

I can sit down for hours or several days and work on a writing wip completely in the zone. I cant do it on command but its at least something I can do

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

Spelling and grammar, and sometimes long running sentences. I just kinda write, theres not really a goal for it to be perfect though so as long as the story gist and vibe is right, im fine with it

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've done it before but only minor, had a friend help me with it (one or two lines of dialogue) Aside from that, I'm not comfortably fluent enough in anything to do it again without assistance

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

Soul Eater, when I was wayyy too young to be posting anything on the internet. My fanfics I wrote are still on fanfic.net to this day

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

It's inbetween TROD and EE&E right now

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Dirty Work 46

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as bullying, familial discord/abuse, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You start a new gig and find one of your clients to be hard to please.

Characters: Loki

Note: ugh i'm tiredddddd

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You stare in the mirror. Your nose is covered in bandages, your eyes swollen along the ridges, and your lip is puffy and split. Your makeup is ruined and your hair too. You are in tatters, the white dress rent to ruins.

Lapping water pours into the large porcelain basin as you lean on the counter, trying to see yourself under all the damage. After tonight, you don't think you'll be the same as you were. You thought before, you'd known the worst of it.

A new beginning and hopefully and ending.

Loki struts in behind you. He's slightly frantic in the way he paces restlessly around the suite. He goes to the tub, bending with a groan as he dips his fingertips in the water, testing the temperature. He adjusts the faucet and stands again.

His hairline is stained in blood and his face patched with dirt. He doesn't seem to notice as he comes up behind you. He looks at you in the mirror.

“You should wash up, get some rest,” he girds, “tomorrow we have long to go.”

“What about you?” You ask for what feels the dozenth time. 

“I'm fine,” he says despite the dark line of stitches through his brow, “I'm very fine.”

He's addled. You've never seen him anything close to unsettled. Not like this. You turn to face him and he shies away.

“I will let you clean up,” he says, “yes, yes, in the morning, I will retrieve the car and our bags…”

He floats back into the sweet and you hear him shuffling around, “...and we will drive away…”

He's almost manic as he rambles to himself. You stare after him. You leave the door open and slowly undress. As you graze the tender spots along your body, you wince.

Naked, you stare at the rising water. You look down at your body, slices along your limbs, scrapes across your skin, and a bite mark on your breast. You feel sick.

You lower yourself into the hot water but it can't cleanse you of the filth. The steam dampens your face as you lean back, closing your eyes. You're exhausted but the adrenaline lingers, keeping you awake.

He said you're leaving. You're going back home. His home. You're not sure you'll ever have one of those.

After a while, you do your best to scrub away the dirt and blood. You’re weak by the time you finish, barely able to lift yourself out of the tub. You emerge, hugging yourself in a towel as you go out into the suite. 

Loki paces, chewing his thumb as he goes back and forth, back and forth. He stops as he notices you. His lips clamp tight and he wordlessly grabs a white robe from the foot of the bed and unfolds it. He drapes it around you and takes the towel away. You tie the belt and cross your arms.

He pulls back the top of the pure white duvet and steps back. You sit on the mattress as he returns to his route, corner to corner at the foot of the bed. You watch him.

“Mr. Laufeyson…” you murmur.

“Loki,” he stops and faces you, “Loki,” he nods vehemently. “You can call me that.”

“Loki,” you remind yourself, “you should… sleep.”

“No, you must,” he waves you off.

“Please,” you go to get up and he rushes to block you, he stands close to the bed.

“I’ll sleep, when you sleep,” he says, “lay down.”

You swallow. You pull your legs up onto the bed and make yourself recline. He’s making you nervous.

“I’m sorry,” You say, “that I broke the rules again. I should’ve stayed close-”

“No,” he shies away, twisting on his heel, “it was me. I broke the rules.”

“You–”

“I should’ve accompanied you to the stalls. I could’ve waited closeby,” he throws a hand up, “she would’ve never… he wouldn’t… I didn’t follow the rules. I broke the rules…” his voice rises, “it isn’t you. It’s me. I cannot make the same mistake twice.”

You don’t know what to say. No, it has to be your fault. It’s always your fault. You are the one who makes mistakes. 

He stops and lowers his head, fluttering his fingers along the stained front of his shirt. He peeks up through his dark lashes, “you know I didn’t… didn’t want her to do that.”

“What?”

“Sif,” he hisses, “I didn’t want to kiss her… I wanted to kiss you… when we were dancing…” he looks away wistfully, “when I saw you in that dress…”He staggers as if he’s been struck, “sleep, pet.”

“But you…”

“Enough,” his voice deepens.

“I can’t sleep, not if you don’t.”

He shrugs and plays with the loose tail of his shirt, “I’m filthy.”

“Go, take a shower, you’ll feel better.”

“I won’t,” he avows, “not until we are gone from here.”

He turns and marches away, leaving the door open as he disappears into the bathroom. You cross your arms over the top of the duvet and sink into the fluffy pillow. You listen as the shower springs to life and let the tension drain from you. The soft buzz of the pipes puts you to sleep nearly as soon as you close your eyes.

✨

When you wake, you feel heavy. The world comes back in fragments. The music, the dancing, running, falling in the dirt, Fossegrim’s shrill squawking, and a weight on top of you. You sit up, heart racing and look around. Then the rest, fleeing the house, the hospital, and finally the hotel.

You sidle to the edge of the bed. Loki isn’t there beside you. Your stomach plummets as you don’t see him anywhere. Did he leave you?

You get up and fix the loose robe around your figure. You near the bathroom door but a dark shape in the corner of your eye distracts you. There, on the sofa, Loki dozes, legs bent to fit, an arm under his head. You frown, wondering why he didn’t share the bed.

You look around and go to the long table against the wall. You flip the switch on the electric kettle and wait as it hums to a boil. You put a tea bag in each cup and pour the hot water. You take each by the handle and approach the low table before the couch, setting them on the thin coasters.

You round to the sofa and stop before Loki. His face is bruised, he sleeps in a robe as fluffy and white as your own, his hair askew but his face tense. You reach to gently squeeze his shoulder as you say his name.

One eye pops open and his green iris moves to look at you. He opens the other and shrugs you off as he sits up abruptly. You take a step back.

“I made tea,” you offer.

He looks past you to the table. He frowns. He frames his forehead then pushes back his dark hair. He stands and strides away from you. He doesn’t say a word as he escapes onto the balcony, pulling shut the sliding door behind him.

You shake and clutch the front of the robe. It’s worse than you thought. He’s mad. You expect as much. You know you’re going back to nothing. He probably won’t even let you past his front gate. Back to your father to grovel and if he won’t even have you, you suppose you might find a shelter.

You sit, not knowing what else to do, and take a cup of tea. You peer into the steeping depth and sniff. You hurt, from head to toe, but nothing is worse than the pit sinking deep in your chest.

The tea goes cold as you wait. When he comes back in, he dresses in his stained white clothing. You get up and put your cup down. You go to him and he sidles away.

“You must stay here,” he says as he skirts around you. He goes into the bathroom and you follow him, standing in the doorway as he uses the cheap hotel room comb to tidy his hair.

“Why?”

“Pet,” he puts the comb down and reaches for a plastic wrapped toothbrush. “You’ll be safe.”

It’s a kind lie. The one you tell when the truth has to wait. You slouch and inch back on your heel, “right.”

You retreat and walk numbly across the suite. You look out the large windows onto the city. Your head spins again. You should sit down but you don’t think you can stay still.

“I won’t be long,” he says as his keys jingle, “you may call down to the lobby, get something to eat. It’ll all be added to the bill.”

You don’t look at him, “thanks.”

He sucks in air as if he means to say something then lets it out, “not long at all.”

You stay as you are until he’s gone. The door closes, the lock beeping, and you nearly collapse. You wade over to the bed and flop onto it. You just want to sleep but your mind won’t stop.

✨

Loki returns nearly an hour later. He offers a fresh set of clothes and not much else. No explanation, just a sense of urgency and evasive looks. You wonder what transpired at the Odinsons manor but you don’t dare ask. Did he tell them everything? Or nothing at all?

You check out of the hotel, his car waiting in the lot. You’re too tired to think anymore. The motion of the car soothes you and your achy body.

You peek over at him, his shoulders tense, his posture stiff, wondering how he can go on so easily. The bruises on his face, his reddened knuckles, and the blows you saw him take, it has to hurt.

You waver between consciousness and sleeping. The long hours lull you along with the silence. Time feels as if it’s standing still yet passes nonetheless. As he pulls up to the familiar gate, you grasp the interior of the door and sit up.

This is it. The final verdict. He drives inside as the gate rolls shut behind him. He turns off the engine and unbuckles his seat belt. He gets out first and as he struts around to your side, you do the same. You wait for his directive.

“Come.” That’s it. That’s all he says.

You follow him inside. Is this it? Will he tell you to pack your things and go? Perhaps he has a lecture for you, worthy only of those grim walls. You put yourself in danger, it’s your own fault, you’re just a stupid little maid.

Little maid…

Your skin crawls as you shake off the memory. You trail Loki upstairs and down the hall. He surpasses the study and the library, he leads you into the bedroom and you hesitate at the threshold. Oh, that must be what’s wrong. Thor touched you in ways only he should. You have to show him it meant nothing.

You touch his hand as you come close and he recoils. You’re breathless at the rejection. That’s not it either. Well, you don’t have much to take with you. You suppose you should get your things ready.

“The doctor says you need rest,” he speaks at last, “please.” He goes to the dresser and pulls a sleek nightgown out.

“Loki..” you eke out.

“Whatever you need, I can fetch. Of course, I will bring up the bags as well.”

“Loki,” you repeat.

“Some tea, oh, and that gas station junk will hardly suffice. You must have a proper meal–”

“Loki,” you say more firmly, “what’s going on?”

He shakes his head and looks away, “lay down.”

That’s an order. You lower your gaze and obey. That’s the only way you’ve ever made him happy and right now, he’s miserable. You go to the bed and take the nightie. He leaves, closing the door behind him.

You change and he returns not long after. As promised, he has the bags. He unzips yours and finds the volume gifted to you. He hands it over.

“I don’t know how much reading you feel like doing,” he says.

You thank him and slide your legs under the blanket. It does feel nice to relax. Better to be in one place. You lean into the pillows and hug the book. He brings over your laptop and opens it up. You blanch, horrified as he lets the desktop load.

He pulls up the brows and you watch his fingers flutter over the keyboard. You furrow your brow curiously as he navigates smoothly. He logs in and brings up a menu of titles.

“In case you desire something to watch,” he stands and angles the screen towards you, “keep your mind busy.”

“You’re leaving?” You ask.

“There is much to do,” he says, “we’ve been away a while.”

“The doctor said you too–”

“I’m fine,” he insists, yet again.

You relent. He won’t listen to you. It’s as if he barely hears a word you say. He’s so swept up in whatever storm is swirling in his head.

“If you need anything, you may send me a text,” he instructs, “but you will rest and you will go no further than the bathroom.”

“Yes, Mr– Loki,” you catch yourself.

“Very good,” he sets his shoulders and spins on his heel.

When he’s gone, you scroll through the titles on the screen. The colours make your head hurt. You choose a show you recognise, a British serial they used to play on the public channel. You turn down the brightness and close your eyes, listening to the low murmur of the dialogue.

You drift on a shallow wave, not quite awake or asleep. The world sways around you as the actors’ voices garble to a soothing hum. Despite the calm of the moment, your heart is uneasy. This won’t last. You will heal soon enough.

You catch yourself snoring and jolt yourself awake. You groan, stiffened from the tumultuous night and the long drive. Ugh, you need to pee.

You get up and relieve yourself. You take your time washing your hands and splash water on your face. It feels nice as your head rattles with each move. You’re thirsty. You come out into the bedroom, foggy as you shuffle around.

You go to the door. You’ll just sneak down and grab a glass. You can make it that far. The handle doesn’t turn. You jostle it, wiggling it, wrenching it, but it doesn’t turn. Huh?

You shake the door in the frame. Locked? Why? He can’t do this. He can’t lock you in like an animal. But he can for isn’t that what you are to him? Pet.

[measuredingold]

slow burn

authors note: three posts in ONE month ? who am i ? 🫣 don’t get used to this lol i’m just working on wips i’ve had for months and finally got around to finishing them ! here’s a jolly piece i’ve been working on since… december i think ? lost inspo and then finished it earlier this week :) as always, enjoy and feedback is appreciated ! titled from slow burn by kacey musgraves

pairing: joakim karlsson x reader

cross-posted on ao3

word count: 4.1k

cw/tw: friends to lovers, feelings realization/confessions ( kind of ), jolly is sort of bad at feelings lol, pushy bartender makes reader uncomfy, drinking, ~kissing~, jolly is jealous lol, 18+ minors dni

"Your face is gonna get stuck like that if you don't stop."

Noah's words pull Jolly out of his thoughts, the older flickering his gaze towards his friend. Noah looks smug, lips curled slightly as his eyes glint playfully and all Jolly can do is scoff, rolling his own.

"Fuck off." The Swede mutters, gaze falling back onto you.

Noah hums, "Dude, seriously. You look like you're trying to blow that guy up with your mind."

"Maybe I am." Jolly's quick to respond, eyes cutting towards Noah again before going back to you.

He watches you laugh and he wishes he could hear it from where he's sitting, in the corner on the other side of the bar. He pretends that he does, that sweet little laugh you did when something's actually funny. He can even see the way your eyes crinkle at the sides, nose scrunching as your laughter fills the air. A scowl makes its way back to Jolly's face as he watches you and the bartender continue to chat it up.

"You know what would fix all of this?" Noah sounds closer and Jolly turns his head, seeing the boy had moved his chair closer to Jolly's, throwing his arm around the back of it. "If you just told her that you want to kiss her."

Jolly's eyes narrow. "Can you please shut the fuck up?"

"Dude." It's Noah's turn to roll his eyes. "If you just... I don't know," His arm that's not resting against Jolly's chair moves in front of him, "tell her how you feel, maybe she'd be laughing at your jokes like that."

"She laughs at my jokes." Jolly mutters, almost to himself, peeling his eyes away from his friend. He tries not to look your way, seriously, but he always seems to find you first in a crowd. You're finally walking away from the bar, carefully holding yours and Noah's drinks. "Why did you make her go up by herself? You should've gone."

"She offered!" Noah's quick to defend himself. "She literally got up before I could even stop her, I didn't make her do shit."

Jolly brings his beer up to his mouth to try and hide the smirk that's currently residing there, eyes on you as you finally make your way back to the table.

You had been one of the first people he met out in Los Angeles, through Noah of course because the guy just seemed to fucking know everyone. It's called networking, dude, he would say. Jolly scoffs at the memory before giving you a smile when you sit down, sliding Noah's drink towards him.

"There you are, my good sir." You say, putting on some kind of accent that Jolly thinks is supposed to be British, and he doesn't have the heart to tell you that it's nowhere close.

"Why thank you, m'lady." Noah responds in the same fashion, voice dipping deeper. Something inside Jolly turns when you laugh at the other boy. "Next rounds on me."

You open your mouth to argue, both of them are sure of that, and Noah holds a hand up towards you, eyes narrowing. "No arguing. Jolly just bit my fuckin' head off for making you go up there by yourself, when I didn't even do that."

Jolly groans. "I did not bite your head off."

"Don't listen to him. He was fucking vicious."

You laugh again, much louder this time, and Jolly swears his entire face flushes just from the sound alone.

"Now, why would you do that, Joakim?"

He's always loved the way his name rolled off your tongue, all sweet and soft. Almost like you were made to say it. He takes another sip of his beer, more so to try and hide the smile that's threatening to form and shrugs his shoulders.

"I didn't do anything. Noah's a fucking liar."

Another laugh pulls from you and Jolly lets himself smile now. He hears Noah scoff beside him and knows the younger boy is probably rolling his eyes, slumping back in his seat because he's too goddamn dramatic for his own good.

"Sounds like him." You say, finally picking your own drink up to take a sip. You fall back against your chair, eyes moving between both Jolly and Noah. "He's always been a liar."

"A shit one at that." Jolly remarks, and you laugh again. Pride fills his chest.

See. I make her laugh, Noah.

"I am literally still right here." Noah grumbles and Jolly finally looks at his friend and sees the small curl of his lips to indicate he wasn't actually mad about the teasing. "You're being assholes to the guy who said he'd buy your next drinks."

"My apologies, man." Jolly raises his glass in a cheer before bringing it back to his lips, taking another drink. "Remind me to be an asshole after you get us our drinks."

Noah rolls his eyes and throws up his middle finger, and Jolly tosses his head back in laughter.

The night goes off as it normally would, fucking around with each other, jamming along to whatever song is playing on the speakers around them. Every now and then Jolly would catch you looking at him, and he swore he noticed a slight twinge of color on your cheeks every time he caught you before you quickly looked away. It happens for the fourth time when Noah finally gets up to get you all another round of drinks, and this time Jolly decides to test the waters.

"What?"

Your eyes widen. "Huh?"

"You keep staring." He tries to act cool, passing it off as no big deal as his arms cross over his chest, and he tries to ignore his rapidly beating heart. "Is there something on my face?"

"No."

"Hm." He hums to himself, head tilting. "Just like looking at me?"

That catches you off guard and he grins to himself when he sees your cheeks flush, turning your head away from him to try and hide.

"You're so full of yourself, Joakim."

"Maybe... but you haven't denied it."

You face him again, the slight twinge of color still on your cheeks as your eyes meet. You smile, soft and small and it has Jolly's heart wanting to explode with... whatever it was he was feeling.

"And what if I do?"

That stuns him into silence but only for a moment, eyes never leaving yours. His lips twitch but he tries to suppress the smile that so desperately wants to stretch across his face, flicking his gaze off to the side.

"Well..." He clicks his tongue before gazing at you once again. "I don't blame you."

You raise a brow. "Hm?"

He shrugs then motions to himself. "I'm very handsome. I'm sure you're not the only one who likes to stare."

"Jesus," You roll your eyes but you're laughing, and he finally lets himself smile. "You really are full of yourself."

"Maybe I am." He reaches for his almost beer, taking one more swig of it before placing it back on the table. "But you like it."

The flush on your cheeks and the confused expression on Noah's face once he returned was very well worth it.

"What's going on here?" Noah questions, handing Jolly's beer to him.

"Nothing." You reply quickly, clearing your throat. You glance at him briefly before focusing your gaze on Noah. "Jolly being Jolly."

"That could mean many, many things." Noah sits back down, sliding your drink towards you before looking at Jolly. "What'd you do?"

Jolly shrugs but says nothing, bringing the new bottle of beer up to his lips, taking a long sip. Both you and Noah stare at him, Noah even more confused than before and your eyes narrowed playfully, causing Jolly to chuckle to himself.

"Ooo-kay." Noah drags out his words, not looking convinced one bit.

"Jesus." You sputter out after taking a sip of your drink, face scrunched up in disgust. "What the fuck did you get me, Noah?"

"A vodka redbull?"

"Are you sure?" You push your drink towards him and he takes it easily, bringing it to his lips and taking a sip.

"Holy shit." He coughs, pushing the drink away from him. "What the fuck is that?"

"That's why I'm asking you!"

"Listen. I ordered a vodka redbull. Your bartender boy is the one who made it so he's the one who fucked up. Take it up with him."

Jolly internally groans at the mention of the bartender from earlier, and rolls his eyes, bringing his beer back up to his lips and taking another long sip.

Of course he fucked it up. Not shocking at all.

"I'm going to." You grumble, staring down at the drink in front of you with extreme distaste. "I can't believe you paid for this."

"What was I supposed to do, drink it?”

"Yes." Both you and Jolly say in unison, casting each other amused glances.

"Unbelievable." Noah grumbles, slumping back against his chair. "Can’t believe you’re being mean to the guy who willingly bought you drinks.”

"You poor baby. How will you ever survive?" Noah grumbles something low under his breath, arms crossing over his chest. You snort before turning your focus on Jolly, eyes softening. "I'm gonna go get whatever the fuck this is fixed. I'll be back."

He nods, lips pressed into a straight line as he watches you walk back up to the bar. His eyes narrow when he notices the bartender find you immediately, a smug smirk sliding onto his lips. Jolly frowns as the realization dawns on him.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." Jolly all but groans before throwing his drink back, taking another nice, long sip.

"What?" Noah's no longer pouting, looking between him and the bar. "What's going on?"

"He did this on purpose, dude." He grumbles, gaze planted on you and the overly flirty bartender. "Knew what she was drinking. Made it shitty so she'd have to come back up there and talk to him."

"Shit." Noah nods to himself, bringing his drink to his lips. “…That's kind of smart when you think about it."

Jolly shoots him a glare.

"What? I'm right!" Noah exclaims. "Fuck up a pretty girls drink so bad she has to come back up and get it fixed, meaning she has to talk to you again? That's smart!"

"And fucking weird." Jolly grumbles, moving his glare away from Noah and back up to the bar.

His fingers tighten around the glass bottle in his hands as you laugh again at something the bartender says, internally rolling his eyes. He's probably not even that funny, he thinks to himself.

He hated that he was jealous. He didn't really have any reason to be, or any right for that matter, because you were just friends. Sure, maybe Noah was right when saying he should just get over it and tell you how he felt, but he can't. Not yet, at least.

Or ever.

Pushing the thought to the back of his mind for the unforeseeable future, he watches you carefully. His fingers tighten around his bottle again when he notices the very second your body language changes at whatever bartender boy is saying to you. Your shoulders stiffen and he can see your brows furrowing, lips dipping into a frown. He definitely just said something you definitely didn't like.

"Uh oh." Noah seems to have noticed as well. "Someone is not happy."

"You think?" Jolly grumbles but his eyes never leave you, glaring at the bartender who leans over the table closer to you.

Everything inside him is telling him to get up and go to you but he keeps himself seated. You can take care of yourself, you don't need him to protect you. You've told him and the boys countless times that you can handle yourself - and you can. He can't help it, though, especially when you take a step back when the bartender tries to reach for your hand, your head shaking.

Fuck that.

He ignores Noah's warning, telling him to let you handle it because he knows you’re capable. He can already hear you calling the bartender out halfway to you but his feet move without much thought. You don't notice him at first, but the bartender does, and the way his eyes narrow at Jolly has him giving the guy a scowl right back, placing his hand on your lower back.

"Hey," He says softly, letting his presence be known. You jump but relax when you see that it's him, relief washing over your face. "Everything alright?"

"Just making her a drink, man."

"I wasn't talking to you." Jolly's response is quick and he doesn't care if he sounds rude, throwing the bartender the fakest smile he can muster before focusing back on you, arm coming up to wrap around your shoulder. "You good?"

Your eyes flick between Jolly and the bartender. "Yeah. I'm good."

"You sure?" He presses. "You didn't look too happy. Decided I should come up here and see what's up."

"Hey man-"

"I thought you were making her a drink?" Jolly tilts his head, feigning innocent curiosity. The others eyes widen, having been taken aback by his words before he frowns, reaching for your now forgotten drink. "Thanks."

"Jolly."

He thinks he's pissed you off, been a bit too rude to your bartender boy, but when he looks at you again you're fighting off a grin.

"What?"

"You're an asshole." You all but sigh out, losing the fight as your lips stretch into a grin.

He can't help but grin down at you, eyes scanning over your face to double check that you weren't upset with him before squeezing your shoulder.

"You love it."

You go to say something but stop when someone clears their throat, the bartender sliding your newly made drink towards you. Jolly lazily moves his gaze back to him, giving him the most unamused look, but his focus isn't on him.

"So, like I was saying before we got interrupted," Jolly doesn't miss the sideways glance the bartender gives him before eyes locking on you again, giving you the sleaziest grin that has Jolly cringing, "in exchange for fixing your drink, why don't you give me that number of yours?"

"Seriously?" Jolly's mouth was moving, but it was you who beat him to the punch. He looks down at you and he has to hold back a laugh as you glare at the bartender in front of you, brows furrowed in disgust. "You fucked with my drink on purpose, dude."

"Yeah, but it was to get you to talk to me again." The guy shrugs as if it's the most obvious thing and Jolly can't help but roll his eyes at him, internally groaning to himself. "Plus, I fixed the drink for free. I think I should be owed something since I didn't make you pay."

"That's fucking weird, man." Jolly finally speaks up, anger washing over him. This dude can't be fucking serious? "She doesn't owe you shit, especially because you fucked it up on purpose."

"This has nothing to do with you."

"I don't give a fuck if it has anything to do with me, you're a fucking creep-"

"Oh, fuck you, man-"

"Stop." Your voice pulls Jolly away from the bartender, casting you a glance. You give him a small, tight-lipped smile before cutting your gaze back to the other, eyes narrowing. "He's right. I don't owe you shit, and the fact that you think I do tells me everything I need to know. Thanks, but no thanks. I’m not interested.”

The guy's jaw twitches and Jolly thinks for a split second he's going to do something rash and he can't help himself from dropping his arm from your shoulder and gently pushing you back. He slips between you and the bar, two barriers to keep you away from this guy. Jolly doesn't avert his gaze from the man in front of him until the bartender sighs, eyes rolling.

"Not even worth it," Jolly swears he hears the bartender grumble under his breath before their eyes lock again. "If you're not going to take the drink, then it's probably time for you guys to leave."

Jolly's eyes narrow. "Are you seriously kicking us out because she doesn't want to give you her fucking number? That's path-"

The bartender looks like he's about to cut him off, and Jolly genuinely wishes he does because he's just dying to rip this guy a new one, but he feels your hand on his back and another presence beside him.

"Everything alright?"

Noah's presence pulls Jolly out of the angry fog that was clouding his mind, head turning to stare at his friend. His expression was hard as his eyes flicked between him, the bartender and you and the bartender's arms crossed over his chest, his angry expression faltering for just a moment.

"Nothing." You say quickly, hand reaching out to circle around Jolly's wrist now. "We were just leaving, actually."

Noah's hard expression was changed to one of confusion, looking down at you with a raised brow. "Really?"

"Yes. Let's go."

With one more glare casted towards the bartender, Jolly let you drag him out of the bar. He ignored the glances from the other people inside, not really caring that anyone saw that. He's actually glad people did and hoped someone recognized that bartender for the fucking creep he is and-

"Jolly."

Your voice catches him off guard and he blinks, staring down at you. You were outside now on the curb and he glanced to his side to find Noah tapping away on his phone, presumably ordering an uber for the three of you. He blinks again and stares down at you once more, a sigh slipping from his lips.

"What?"

"You didn't have to do that."

"Do what?"

"Don't piss me off." You gave him an unamused look, lips pressed in a straight line. "I could've handled it."

"I know." And he does. "I was just making sure you were alright. That’s what friends do.”

You pause, eyeing Jolly. He feels like his skin is on fucking fire under your gaze and does his best to look anywhere but you.

"Joakim," Your voice is soft as you step closer to him, arms crossing over your chest. "Why'd you really do that?"

“I already told you-“

“Were you jealous?”

Your question stuns him and he can only stare down at you. Of course he was jealous. What else would he be? He can’t admit that, though. He was also your friend above all else, though, and seeing that dude make you uncomfortable was the last straw for him.

“Why’d you-“

"Dude." He cuts you off, pinching the bridge of his nose. He doesn't know if it's the anger bubbling through his veins from that interaction, or maybe because Noah's words are still swirling around his mind, but his mouth moves before he thinks twice about it. "You fucking know why."

There's another long pause.

The air shifts between the two of you and Jolly can hear Noah off to the side, shuffling his feet, trying to act like he's not eavesdropping on this conversation when he so obviously is. Your eyes are still on him, he knows that much, and he spares a glance down at you. Your gaze is much softer than before, arms still crossed over your chest, and he swears he sees a hint of a smile on your lips.

"Actually, I don't fucking know why you were a dick to him. Please enlighten me."

Jolly groans. "Dude."

"Dude." You mimic his voice, the smile playing on your lips only growing more and Jolly can't stop his own from forming.

"You know why." His voice drops, much quieter than before, and he finds himself almost feeling... shy? "Don't make me say it, okay?"

Noah clears his throat from beside him, coughing out a quiet, "Say it."

Jolly shoots a glare towards his friend and Noah looks anywhere but him, turning his back to stare at the brick wall of the bar. He rolls his eyes before focusing back on you, your head tilting with a playful grin.

"I think you should take your friend's advice." You take another step closer to him, the tips of your shoes touching now. "Say it."

"I can't."

And it's true. He doesn't think he can. At least not here, with Noah beside him. He thinks it's because he doesn't want to prove the male right. He'll be damned if he boosts Noah's already inflated ego. Another part of him knows that he would rather do it with just the two of you. Privacy, not in the open on the curb of some fucking bar you got kicked out of because the bartender was a creep.

"Why not?"

"Because it's hard." He tilts his head to where Noah's standing, back still turned but most definitely listening in. "Plus, he's right there listening like a creep. Can't boost that ego of his for being right."

"And what is he right about?"

He lets out a soft sigh of your name before saying, "Don't make me say it."

"Okay." Disappointment flashes across your face and Jolly's heart drops for a split second before you speak again, "Show me, then."

"...Show you?"

"Yeah. Show me. Since you can't say it."

His eyes lock with yours, searching for some kind of answer. You can't be asking for that. If it's what Jolly's thinking. Another beat of silence passes and Jolly's eyes drop to your lips quickly before dragging back up your face, but you definitely caught him.

"Are you sure?"

It's probably a dumb thing to ask, he knows, but he can't help it. He needs to know you're sure, one hundred percent positive before he does something that will change the trajectory of your friendship forever. This time it's your eyes that drop to his lips and he definitely doesn't miss the way your tongue darts out, swiping across your bottom lip before your gaze locks with his again.

"Yes. I'm sure."

Jolly could do two things right about now. He could run, like his body is yelling at him to do. Go on like nothing happened and possibly ruin whatever it is the two of you have going on. Or he could just do it. Say fuck it, listen to his mind for once, and right now his mind is screaming about how bad he wants to fucking kiss you.

His eyes search yours one more time, and the way you're staring at him, eyes begging, has his hand reaching up to cup your cheek. Fuck it.

He hears you suck in a deep breath, hand reaching up to circle around his wrist to keep his hand there. He chuckles quietly at the feeling of your shaky fingers against his skin and he's glad to know he's not the only one nervous here before dipping his head, lips pressing to yours gently. He keeps it short and simple, not exactly wanting to kiss you the way he's been dreaming of out of this corner. He can tell you don't mind with the way your fingers tighten around his wrist, sighing softly against his lips.

He pulls back moments later and watches your eyes flutter open, a small, satisfied grin settling on your lips.

"Oh." You breathe out, biting down on your bottom lip to contain the smile beginning to form.

Jolly doesn't know what comes over him but the urge to kiss you soars, his chest warming at the thought and he finds himself leaning back in. Your lips don't connect, though, a loud honking from the street causing the two of you to jump apart.

"Ubers here." Noah's already making his way to the Uber and Jolly hears him asking for the driver's name before he finally glances his way. "Keep your hands to yourselves the entire ride, please. I don't want to be traumatized."

"Fuck you, Noah." Both you and Jolly say in unison.

You give each other a look before bursting out into laughter, especially at the not amused look Noah is giving you. He grumbles something before getting into the car and you tug at Jolly's wrist, your fingers still attached to him.

"Let's go."

The smile you give him almost knocks the breath right out of him. He lets you drag him to the car and the three of you cram into the backseat, Noah whining about how he's already squished and how unfair it is. Jolly only grins from beside you when you start to bicker with Noah, his hand coming down to rest on your thigh. You don't stop speaking but your hand does come down to his, fingers lacing with his own.

Jolly turns his head to look out the window, hiding his smile.