#my wifey booo

[cherryberry-sugarandspice]

°Anna Marie LeBeau- Uncanny X-Men 2024°

[earthmoonz]

WIFEY. PT 2 | EP ONE (1.6)

start / previous / next [haven’t read part one?]

a/n: thoughts on the new font style? is it easier to read? lmk!

(transcript below)

(Max): …I’m sorry sir but your card’s been declined.

(customer): [irritated, low] shit. try this one please.

[The card machine beeps, the second card has also been declined]

(Max): That one didn’t go through either. 

(Customer): [Raised, embarrassed] Then it’s your machine then! You should give me a free drink for the bloody inconvenience!

(Max): [Unimpressed] Sir please don’t raise your voice at me. Do you have a third card I can try?

(Autumn): [leaning over, mocking] Joe, are you bothering my staff again?

(Joe): N-No it's just my card, it’s not working.

(Autumn): Mmhm, and that’s our fault because?

(joe): It was fine earlier I just-

(Autumn): You just need to reel ya neck in. You only just got off a 6 month ban. I’d hate for the next one to be permanent.

(Joe): [heeding the warning]…Sorry. I’ll call my bank. See what the issue is. [He walks away]

(Autumn): [Facing Max] You good? Don’t let Joe rattle you, he’s harmless. Just gets mouthy from time to time.

(Max): …Yeah I’m fine. I know his type from before.

(Autumn): Alright. Why don't you go and take your break while it’s quiet?

[***]

[Max uses the toilet, their mind begins to wonder while they wash their hands]

[flashback]

(Aish): [Snorting a line] Sure you don’t want some?

(Max): You know I don’t do that shit when I'm working.

(Aish): Relax man, you got like a week left here.

(Max): Yeah and I wanna keep it cute in the process.

(Aish): Booo. It’s not everyday worry about how things look, Max. Imagine if you actually let shit flow for once.

[Bathroom door opens, snapping Max out of it]

[Present day]

(Max): [startled, breathless] Fuck.

[screampied]

Ohmygosh missing a flight is one of my BIGGEST FEARS 😭😭 I’m glad that you still made it to your destination safely and had a good time!!

Colorado is dry and hot lol it’s considered a desert state but it’s also BUSYYYYY. I grew up in the Denver area and there are SOOOOO many people, I hate it lol the traffic is awful, it’s expensive and the people are mean. But that’s why I don’t live there anymore 🙂‍↔️ I can’t do big cities, I’m too anti-social for that lol

It was good to see the fam fs! I hadn’t seen my little siblings in almost a year and I practically raised those little gremlins so it was great to spend some time with them ❤️❤️

And I gotchu bbs, anyone who thinks you’d cheat on the wifey Hoshi is delulu 😤

Buuuuuuutt I just saw the sucking on Sukuna’s NIPNOPS FIC AND GIRL IM SQUEALING. Never knew I needed that in my life until now. Sheeeesssshhhhh 🥵🥵🥵

-🕷️

LITERALLY. it was my first time missing a flight and i missed them TWICE 🚶‍♀️‍➡️i’ve been in like so many airports that week it was chaotic booo but the trip made it all worth it so 👯‍♀️ !!! thank yewww mwah i appreciate it xo

oooo idk why but i thought it would be like cold hmmm. hopefully u stayed nice n warm bae 💓. i can relate, where im from it’s super humid n hot like all year round bleh. oomf real i can’t stand big cities bc of the ppl n stuff </3 glad ur out of there tho !!!! and awww so cute glad u spent lots of time w ur fam 🫂 awhhh the gremlin bbs.

SEE 🤏 this is why ur real 🤏 thank yew 😙

and TEHEHEHEJ IM GLAD U ENJOYED ty for reading i was def horny n felt like adding that lil detail 😞 wanna suck his tits so bad oomfffff

[1tsdanny]

I'm 5'2.5!

Also, hi! I hope you had/are having an amazing day, and if anyone is being mean to you- STABBY STAB STAB🗡

Anyways-

I have MAPS tomorrow, they frickin' suck, the school system istg, deathhhh to schoolllll

-wifey

Hello my love! Aw you’re the perfect height for hugging and tippy-toe cheek kisses!

Booo school! School sucks! Good luck on your tests lovely!

[cxtronica]

League of Extremely Weird Non-Canons and Short Stories 1: Ashe, Queen of the Frostmites

Ever since that fateful day, Ashe was never the same.

Even with a steady win streak, the Freljordian did not hold a smile for long as she passed by the champions, summoners, and spirits that greeted her. She looked begrudgingly at her left hand, which glowed an eerie blue.

As she entered her room, she saw her husband Trynd, who was pruning a few Freljordian plants. A number of blue flying insects that looked like the cross of an ant, a bee, and a termite were bumbling about on the flowers, spreading pollen to each one of them. He held a calm demeanour as he approached his wife, wrapping her in his hug. The young warmother reluctantly accepted the hug. Anxiety and gloom clouded her thoughts as she put the frost bow on the table beneath the flowers.

As Ashe headed for the walk in closet, Tryndamere locked the front door.

"Is it the hand, dear?" he asked calmly, putting the gardening gloves and the shears inside the drawer. The blue insects followed the warmother swiftly.

"It's okay. The door's locked. You can change now," Tryndamere added.

With a few winces, Ashe transformed. Once she stepped out, she was something different. She still retained her upper half, except her skin had a good cyan tone. Below the waist, she was a frostmite queen:

her blue antlike thorax starting from the waist and extending a good four feet to the back

her six eight foot termite legs extending from the sides of her thorax

her elongated, large termite queen rear (which was 20 feet long, 8 feet high and 8 feet wide) attached at the back end of her thorax

and her six wings, a set of queen bee, queen ant, and queen termite, all attached to her human back.

She was wearing a white shirt with Doublelift's caricature in the center.

Ashe covered her face with her hands, and then Tryndamere went over to hug her upper half.

"It's okay, dear," Tryndamere replied, "Look up."

Ashe slowly looked up, her cyan eyes meeting his brown eyes.

"Pufferfish?" Trydamere asked. Ashe puffed up her cheeks with air. Then, the Barbarian king slowly pinched them, releasing the air. From his view, Ashe did look like a fish blubbing in the water. Then she smiled.

"Never fails to cheer me up, hub," she spoke as she lay on the bed, curling up her rear abdomen so that she could fit.

Tryndamere discreetly took a picture with his phone and uploaded it to Riotgram with this caption.

definitely.not.marc A happy wifey curling up in bed in her new form. Ever since that frostmite alate bit her, it's done some good to the tribe. Frostmites apparently contain True Water in their system, which makes Freljordian plants grow well.

Then he smiled as he climbed onto the bed. Tryndamere was invested in making sure Ashe gets comfortable no matter what form she is in. So, ever since the day she found out about her new form, he began taking candid pictures of her in her more 'regal' form, as he calls it, and uploads them on social media with uplifting descriptions. It was already three weeks into the project, and he felt that it was time to tell her.

"You know, hon," he said as he wrapped his left arm around her upper half, "I was doing something for you over the last three weeks on Riotgram. I've been secretly taking pics of you in your new form and uploading them on RG."

Instantly, Ashe stared at him coldly. In a voice equally cold, she asked, "You did what?"

"Yeah, I took pics of you and uploaded them on RG," Tryndamere replied sheepishly, "I was hoping others would appreciate your new form."

Furious, Ashe stormed over to get her phone and opened her RG account. She searched with fury for the photos, but none of them appeared.

"Where are they, Tryndamere?!" Ashe exclaimed.

"Follow my other private account, definitely.not.marc," Tryndamere replied.

"You better accept it!" Ashe replied. Her frostmites carried her bow over to her.

zee.frost.archer started following you.

Tryndamere accepted her request on his account, and kept a smile as she scanned through the pictures. There were pictures of them in their little home in the mountain cooking and cleaning and doing the household chores. There were also pictures of them snuggling in bed. But most of the pictures involved Ashe doing (or at least trying to do) the things she loved doing when she would still be fully human, and in all of those pictures, she was smiling.

One of those pictures was of her making a six winged snow angel in the Freljordian snow at its coldest, and the only thing she wore was a plain white T-Shirt. It held this caption:

definitely.not.marc Snow angels! My angel in the process of making a bigger snow angel. Did you know that frostmites developed a natural affinity / immunity to the harsh, unforgiving temperatures of Freljord? I guess my angel also has that too!

There was also another picture of Ashe, in her new form, cheering for Evelynn on the Summoner's Rift with the captions:

definitely.not.marc Go, Evie, go! Evelynn is one of her biggest idols in and out of the Rift. For that reason, Ashe has been playing "POP/STARS" and "I Won't Let You Go Away" non-stop.

evies.embrace AAAAAAAAAA JSKDIRIJRFNSJIFM Is that Ashe? She thicc AF!

Finally, there was a picture of her sleeping on her curled rear end on the bedroom carpet which is softer than the bed. It had this caption.

definitely.not.marc Snug as a bug in a rug! Waifu likes sleeping on what she calls her "butt-pillow". A few frostmites sleep around her, forming a cute little ring around their 'queen'.

This one had a little comment thread. So she opened it and read.

ava.ava.rose Is this what happened to my little warmother? Damn, she also make a fine BROODmother. #thicc #proudicebornrighthere #signalhereisgoodsomightaswelluseit

ryldasel BOOO!!!! Lame joke alert!

ava.ava.rose What? Can't I flaunt my tribe's own warmother having a new form, sis? Or is yours going out of shape?

ice.cold.L155 OOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! *fire emoji*

SEJofthenorth I'm still buff, u idiots. Anyway, nice ass Ashe! Irelia will be jealous.

ryldasel Out of all the body parts, u choose to critique her butt.

SEJofthenorth CAN'T U ALL RESPECT MY PREFERENCES.

ava.ava.rose Dudettes, chill!

ice.cold.L155 Lame joke alert.

Ashe burst into laughter right after reading the thread. Then, she turned to Tryndamere, and instantly understood what he was actually doing. He was making her love herself and her own skin.

With a wink, she gave the man her phone and asked her to take a full body shot. After that, Tryndamere climbed in bed with her and then, both of them took a selfie. The Queen of Freljord then uploaded the pictures on RG with this caption.

zee.frost.archer Hi! Long time no see. It's me. This is my new form. Hubba says he likes it. He's been sharing candid photos of me everyday for you guys, just to show me that I should love myself more. He loves me no matter what. Thanks, @the.real.tryndamere xoxo

[katiemcgrath]

hi, im new to your blog but i was wondering if you could give the general storyline of Lancelot and Guinevere? I tried to search on my own but there are so many versions, which one would be the "general" one?

 I suppose I mostly follow Le Morte d’Arthur, though as with almost all literature it has it’s problems. In a quick summary; 

Guinevere is kidnapped. Booo. Lancelot goes to the tower and saves her. Stuff happens, they do some naughty naughty. [Although in every edit that I’ve made I have made their relationship strictly non-sexual but thinking of perhaps changing that? idk]. More stuff happens, Guinevere gets extremely jealous when Elaine comes along and banishes Lancelot from court, at one point he jumps out a window. More stuff happens. Mordred and Agravaine find out about Guinevere and Lancelot and go to Arthur and are like ‘omg!!! arrrtttieee! your wifey is cheating on you’. And Arthur’s like ‘but I don’t wanna sentence her to death! :(’ and people are like ‘umh… you gotta’. So at this point Lancerunaway runs away. So Jenny’s there about to be burnt at the stake BUT THEN PRINCE CHARMING ON HIS WHITE HORSE COMES ALONG and is like ‘jeeeeeeennyyy!’ and she’s like ‘LAAANNNCEEYY’ and so yeah. And so then Artie’s like ‘I GOTTA FIGHT LANCELOT!!’ and so Arthur chases him to France and whilst he’s away, his bastard son, Mordred, is like; ‘my daddy is so mean. I should be King and Marry my step-mamma, Guinevere’. So Arthur comes back and battles Mordred, they both die. So Guinevere is at Almesbury convent and Lancelot goes to her and she faints… THREE TIMES!!! THREE TIMES SHE FAINTS! And Lance is like ‘Gwennypoo! Come with me! COME WITH ME!!’ and Jenny’s like ‘No. We have done bad. We do bad stuff.’ and so yeah. So then Guinevere dies as a nun in the convent and Lancelot takes her body to Glastonbury and buries her with Arthur. Lancey goes back to the monk place and is so heartbroken without his sweet dearest, most darling, lovey-dovey love and dies himself. 

“Truly mine heart would not serve to sustain my careful body.”

Every adaptation is different and none is right or wrong [except bbc merlin. ‘cause that is wrong]. Most stories follow a similar line. In a lot of older stories Lancelot didn’t exist. in a lot Guinevere is completely devoted to Arthur. 

In my eyes I either see them as Guinevere is helplessly and utterly in love with Lancelot as her sweetest and most devoted lover and she loves Arthur as her liege lord and King and that’s where the conflict is. Love vs honour. Other times, I see it as She loves them both in equal manners but she is not allowed to. Always, Lancelot loves Arthur as much as he does Guinevere and that’s the conflict for him. And Arthur is always heartbroken. And recently I’ve been toying with the idea of them loving eachother and happiness and even sexiness together, but yet to find a fancast for that.