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phagechildon · 5 years ago

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That Which is Human - Chapter 5

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Summary: No one’s mentally prepared as Natsume’s past comes back to haunt him. But he’s not going down without a fight, especially not when his friends and family are more than ready to protect him, even if it’s from his own choices.

Warnings: Torture, blood, child abuse, mentions of child abuse, Stockholm Syndrome, and kidnapping

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Where am I? It’s cold… so, cold…

My hands move up and rub my upper arms, but it does little to nothing to ease the chill.

It’s dark… why is it so dark?

Slowly I open my heavy eyes, hardly noticing a difference.

Strange… how can it be so dark when I hear so much? The cawing of seagulls, the crashing of waves, people’s laughter and chatter - the soothing sound of water gently moving up the sand before receding.

I rarely go to the beach, but I know the sounds and smells. The salt water makes my eyes burn slightly as I try to savor this moment.

But I can’t. There’s a deep uneasy knot in the pit of my stomach that’s telling me to scream for help.

My voice is gone though, I can’t speak. I can barely breath.

My arms are pinned to my sides, along with my feet.

I can’t move.

Not like this… please not like this. I can’t be trapped again!

Cold water brushes my feet, making my heart stop in my chest.

The water is rising. Sharp pain echoes through my left arm as I try to move it.

It’s broken. When did I break it? More importantly, how am I going to get out of this?

‘Sensei-’ I yell, finding my voice swallowed by a cloth in my mouth. My eyes widen, my breathing quickens as a full on panic attack settles in. Desperately I thrash around only for the pain in my broken arm to grow, which worsens my panic attack. Tears of fear trail down my cheeks as I try to scream at the top of my lungs.

‘Sensei! Nyanko Sensei!!’ I try, but no words echo past the cloth.

No one can hear me, and no one knows where I am. The beach is far from home, no one would even think to search for me here.

‘Help me… someone... anyone…’

The cold water rushes up my legs and stops at my hips, making me whimper.

‘I’m coming-’ a very faint voice whispers, so faint I almost dismiss it as my imagination. ‘I’ll find you-’

‘Takashi,‘ my eyes widen in shock, hearing Shigeru’s voice. There’s a warmth on my shoulder, a warmth that helps me take a deep shuddery breath. What’s Shigeru doing here? How did he find me?

‘If only you could see how many people are here to support you.’

Huh? What’s he talking about?

‘Come on Natsume,’ Nishumura’s voice calls right after, only making him more confused. ‘Wake up already or we’ll graduate without you!’

‘He’ll wake up way before then,’ Kitamoto scolded the other. ‘Get better soon Natsume, we got fishing to do!’

‘Seriously? We have final exams coming up and all you guys can think about is fishing? You can’t leave me with all these irresponsible delinquents Natsume,’ Sasada’s voice came next. ‘Besides, you already promised we’d all go to the art museum, so you better wake up while they still have a good student discount going!’

‘You should see what Sasada had the whole school make for you,’ Taki chimed in, her voice hoarse as if she was sleep deprived. ‘There’s a thousand of them, each made while praying for your safety and health.”

“I-it was a group effort,” Sasada bashfully retorted. “The teachers helped too!”

“The Fujiwaras and my father made some as well,” Tanuma said, sounding even worse than Taki.

“Hey, what am I, chopped liver?” Shibata snapped, oddly sounding exhausted as well. “I know you’ll wake up, you’re tougher than this!”

“He’s right,” Natori said next, his voice almost sounding hollow, as if he hadn’t slept in a week. “You’ve become quite the popular guy. You’re almost as popular as me,’ he tried to joke, but there was an underlying sadness the exorcist couldn’t hide from him. ‘Wake up soon Natsume, we’re all waiting for you.’

I can hear them - I hear all of them surrounding me with their love. I take another deep breath and find myself completely wrapped in their warmth. My arm’s fixed; I’m no longer bound. My feet start moving as I follow their voices towards a growing light - and home.

The light vanishes - it’s dark again. But that’s okay - he’s okay. The voices are a lot louder than before, but far less in number.

Sluggishly he opened his eyes, the bright light forcing him to close them, unintentionally letting out a pained groan.

The voices stop, the room instantly filling with silence. Fear slowly bubbles into his heart, wondering if he had just imagined the voices altogether. But how was that possible when the voices made him feel that way?

“Natsume?” Natsume’s heart stopped in his chest, realizing that voice belonged to Natori.

Forcing his eyes open, he grimaced from the light. Strange, it was never this bright in the barn. But if Natori was here, then this couldn’t be the barn. Maybe he was at a hospital, like the one he saw in his nightmare.

Summoning what little strength and courage he had left, he tried to speak. “N-nn-” only to erupt in violent dry coughs, his eyes forcing themselves shut as pain shot through his chest and down to his spine.

Oh, there’s the pain. At least he could speak; it was rare not being gagged anymore. He was so relieved a small tear slid past his cheek.

“-need to take it easy,” Hinoe’s voice slowly rang, making him even more confused. Hinoe and Natori were in the same room? That was definitely a combination he thought he’d never witness.

Taking another deep shuddering breath, he opened his eyes again, seeing both their worried and pale faces staring down at him. The ceiling above them wasn’t dark brown wood, it was white tile, which could only mean one thing: He was in a hospital, not the barn. He was finally out of there, finally in the soft and gentle hands of people who cared about him. Tears of pure relief fell past his cheeks as he looked between the two, his weak fingers clenching the sheets as he let out a choked sob.

No more punches, no more blades, no more cigarettes, no more water - just recovery.

“Are you in any pain?” Natori quickly asked upon seeing the tears, to which the boy merely shook his head, finding it agonizing to do so and immediately regretted it.

“N-no,” he managed out, those pale cracked lips slowly smiling in pure relief. “Wh-ere?”

“He found you in the woods,” Nyanko’s voice came this time, making Natsume’s eyes widen in relief. Nyanko Sensei was here too? More tears gathered in his eyes as warmth fluttered into his heart, feeling fully safe for the first time in what felt like ages. Knowing Natori was here made him feel comfortable sure, but Sensei made him feel at home.

He opened his mouth to speak, only to feel his entire body freeze over in an instant. Something brushed his leg, something was touching him. No cry or gasp left his lips, so used to being gagged during the majority of the captivity.

Natori quickly pulled Nyanko Sensei from the bed and into his arms, both of their faces filling with deep concern. “It’s okay, it was just Sensei,” the exorcist reassured, relief washing over his face as Natsume finally started breathing again.

Strange, he didn’t even notice he stopped. He just braced himself to feel pain. Part of him was concerned as to why he didn’t feel it. It must’ve been because they were real, right?

“Sen... sei,” he choked, finding himself at the verge of another violent coughing fit. “Is this… real?”

“It is,” Hinoe reassured as she took a step towards Natori, coming into his line of sight again. “Take it easy, you’ve been through a lot.”

“As much as I don’t want to, we have to call the doctors in to take a look at you.” The exorcist very slowly reached over and pressed the emergency call button that was resting at the edge of the hospital bed’s gate, watching with both anger and sorrow as Natsume tensed considerably, just as he did with Sensei. “Sorry, the doctors need to check you over,” Natori explained as Sensei jumped out of his arms, not wanting the doctor or nurse to see him. “You were in a coma, mostly induced by a curse, but they need to make sure you’re alright.”

Natsume’s eyes widened in absolute horror at the news. He had been comatose? For how long, and why??

No, that wasn’t important - Toshiki was. He didn’t have much time before he was dumped in the forest, so how much time did he have now?

“H-how long?!” He asked, his whole body shaking. What if it was already too late?

“The doctor will explain-”

“How long?!” His voice got stronger through his desperation. Natori’s eyes widened more, sensing the underlying serious tone and stiff body language.

“It’s been three days.”

Three days?? It certainly wasn’t ideal, but they could work with it - they still had time.

“I-” the door to his room opened, his words halting. Talking drew attention to himself, he couldn’t let that man hear him-!

“It’s just the doctor and nurse,” Natori gently explained, seeing the fear fully encompass him. The doctor and nurse both smiled warmly at him, their pace slowing as to not frighten him, but his attention was no longer on them.

Just past Natori and in front of the door, his eyes settled upon Shigeru and Touko who were sleeping against each other on some chairs where Tanuma and Taki were standing behind, their tearful horribly sleep deprived eyes staring right at him. They were holding back for his sake, he realized. They didn’t want to overcrowd him, and Natsume was more than grateful as he was overwhelmingly glad to see them.

“Everyone out,” the doctor ordered. As soon as he did the Fujiwaras woke up, blinking awake at the commotion. Despite seeing their faces, fear started settling in with that command.

Everyone out? But he just woke up - he just got here! Why did they have to leave? He didn’t want them to leave - he didn’t even get to talk to them yet! What if they were seperated and this was the last time he got to see them?!

“Don’t worry, they aren’t going anywhere,” Natori motioned to Hinoe and Hiiragi, realizing Natsume was no longer paying attention to him as his eyes met his foster parent. Taking a deep breath he looked at Hiiragi, who nodded.

“We’ll protect him,” she reassured.

“Takashi-!!” The Fujiwaras both gasped as they ran to the bed, ignoring the doctor’s order. Tears of pure relief gathered in their eyes as Touko very gently reached out with her warm and gentle hand towards his face. Natsume couldn’t help the way he tensed and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling that hesitant hand caressing his cheek.

Warm… it was warm, the same warmth he felt in his sleep. The tension immediately left as he opened his eyes again, staring at both of them with more tears starting to well.

This wasn’t an illusion, this was real - they were real. He was finally safe; he was finally home .

“You’re awake - thank the gods you’re awake!” She cried in pure happiness.

“Are you hurting anywhere?” Shirgeru asked, to which Natsume gently shook his head, more tears falling down his cheeks as he ignored the pain.

“I-I’m okay, s-sorry-” his sore and dry throat couldn’t handle so many words as he started coughing again. Immediately the doctor and nurse came over, forcing the Fujiwara’s back.

“Please leave the room. We need to check him over and make sure he’s okay. You can come back in once we’re finished.”

As much as the couple didn’t want to leave their son, they both sighed, knowing it was best. “We’ll be right back, okay? We’re gonna be on the other side of the door, waiting to be let in again, promise.”

Natsume didn’t want them to leave - he was terrified he’d never see them again! For all he knew this doctor and nurse actually worked for that man. His racing heart was detected by the machines, making him stiffen a bit. He didn’t want to worry them anymore but he was finally home, what if something ripped him away again?!

“We won’t let them hurt you,” Misuzu’s voice reassured from outside, making Natsume grow still in confusion. Was that Misuzu? How? Despite the pain, he slowly glanced over to the rest of the room, feeling his heart swell in relief and happiness. The Dog’s Circle was there smiling warmly and worriedly. Misuzu was peeking in through the window, Hinoe was standing next to Chobihige and Kappa while the Middle Ranks were sitting on the ground drinking sake. He could make out Sensei’s eyes from underneath a jacket left by someone on a chair, obviously trying to blend in so he wouldn’t get thrown out. Considering Hiiragi moved to stand behind the chair, it must’ve been Natori’s jacket.

He wasn’t alone, he’d never be alone again even as the Fujiwaras closed the door on their way out.

“Hello Takashi Natsume, I’m doctor Irie Kyosuke, but call me Dr Irie. You’ve been in my care since you arrived. How are you feeling?” Natsume slowly turned his attention back to the humans, his neck intensely sore and throat aching. He wasn’t sure how much he could talk, but the faster they left the better.

“I-” he didn’t last one syllable as he started violently coughing again, his entire body igniting in pain. His breathing started to get shallow as his ears started ringing again, making him feel even more disoriented than before.

“Don’t speak,” the doctor quickly instructed, hardly audible above the ringing. “You were severely dehydrated and malnourished when you were brought in, we had to use a feeding tube yesterday. We’re going to give you something that’ll help. But in order for us to do that, we have to raise the bed a bit, okay?”

Natsume bite his bottom lip, not wanting to feel the pain that wracked his body earlier. But if he wanted the others to come back he needed to do what they said.

Nodding slightly, the nurse picked up the remote that was strapped to the side of the bed and pressed a button on it. The upper part of the bed instantly started raising, the pain in his chest becoming sharp and prominent.

Pain is temporary, he reminded himself as he took a deep breath through his nose, ignoring the black dots that plagued his vision.

“I need you to take a drink, okay?” The doctor instructed. Natsume looked over at him, not even realizing the bed stopped moving. “It’ll soothe your throat and make it easier to talk.” When the solution was offered, he reached up to take it, but found it very hard to move his hands even an inch off the bed. It felt like his blood had been replaced with lead! Fear starting bubbling within him again, wondering if there was something wrong with him.

“Don’t worry, you’ll recover,” Hinoe said from the foot of the bed, trying to help him calm down. “We dispelled a curse a few hours ago, your body hasn’t recovered from it yet. The medicine they’re giving you was made by Benio, we just made them think it’s from their storeroom.”

‘A curse?’ Natsume wanted to ask, but held back. They broke the sleeping curse, not the other. Thank goodness.

“That’s okay, the nurse will gently tilt it into your mouth, okay?” The doctor said as the said nurse brought the small cup to his lips. It smelled like berries and mint, which was an odd combination. It was made by Benio though, so he decided not to question it as he opened his mouth, swallowing the solution. As it slid down his throat, it seemed to coat it, much to his surprise. The mint even helped soothe the burning sensation while also clearing up his sinuses.

“Is that better?”

“Yes,” Natsume smiled, his voice still raspy but much better and stronger than before. He could even breath a little easier now while the pain in his throat nearly completely vanished.

“Good,” the doctor smiled back. “As the others probably informed you, you’ve been comatose since you were found three days ago. I’m going to ask a series of questions. Please answer them to the best of your ability.”

“Okay,” Natsume agreed, seeing the doctor waiting for a response from him.

“Do you remember your name?”

“Yes, I’m Takashi Natsume,” he said, though found the answer almost felt foreign on his tongue.

“How old are you?”

“Sixteen,” he said, feeling his mind getting a little hazy. Was it because of the medicine, or perhaps his condition? The doctor and the nurse looked at him a bit in concern, but didn’t say anything.

“When’s your birthday?”

“July first.” The doctor took out a small flashlight from his pocket and shined it in one of his eyes. Natsume knew better than to shy from it, but the beam was so powerful it became painful. The ringing from earlier slowly started fading back with a vengeance, getting louder and louder the more the doctor shined the light in his eyes.

“How old are you, Takashi?”

Natsume’s eyes scrunched in confusion, his head starting to ache horribly. Didn’t he just answer that? “Sixteen.”

The doctor and nurse grew worried as the ringing grew even more intense, making it hard to hear. “When is your bir-” the rest was lost as a sharp pain coursed through his head, forcing him to squeeze his eyes tightly shut.

Dizzy, he was so dizzy, and cold. He couldn’t help the way his body shuddered, the strong smell of salt water overwhelming his nostrils as his head pounded harder than a jackhammer.

‘Don’t worry, I’ll find you,’ he heard himself whisper faintly against his will. ‘I’ll help you, I promise I’ll help you - I’ll help all of you-’

Natsume felt his eyes snap open, finding himself looking up at the tiled ceiling again. The lights were dimmed a bit, which made it easier for his eyes to adjust this time.

“Takashi,” he felt a warm hand clench his, making him immediately stiffen. That voice though - slowly he turned his sore neck and saw Touko smiling tiredly at him. Shigeru was asleep in the chair next to her, his arms crossed and body hunched forward a bit. It was obvious he tried so hard to stay awake, he probably just fell asleep too based off the position he was in.

“How are you feeling?” She asked softly, bringing his attention back to her.

“Confused,” he admitted as his eyebrows slowly knitted together, his orbs searching the room for the doctor and nurse. Where were they? And where were Natori, Taki and Tanuma? Sensei was in his true form with his head resting against his bed while the Middle ranks and Hinoe were sitting by the window-

Wait, it was dark outside - was it night already?!

“Wasn’t I just… talking to the doctor?”

Touko’s breath hitched as she brought his hand up to her cheek, more worry enveloping her features. “You passed out,” she said as she pressed a kiss to the back of his hand, her breath shuddering against it. “They… they said you were confused and didn’t remember much.”

“What?” Natsume blanched, shaking his head ever so slightly. There was no way he got those questions wrong. He turned to his youkai friends, seeing Nyanko sadly shake his head yes.

“Wh-what did I say?” His voice trembled. How… could he have gotten them wrong?

“You said you were eight, and that your birthday was February twenty first.”

His face paled over instantly. That was not what he said, he was absolutely sure of it.

“I’m… sixteen, and my birthday is July first!” He croaked, squeezing Touko’s hand back in fear.

Light reignited in her eyes as she hiccuped into a small relieved sigh. “Oh thank goodness,” she sniffled, holding his hand to her chest as she leaned over the bed a bit, pressing the call button with her free one. “I knew you’d remember.”

They were always so quick to click that button - all he wanted was some time to talk to his loved ones and tell them what was going on. No one could be trusted, not even the cops that would no doubt enter the room to take his statement later.

He needed to talk to Natori and his youkai friends together. He needed both of their opinions since this involved both humans and youkai.

Before he could ask Touko where Natori went, the door to his room opened, the same doctor and nurse coming in. Touko turned to them with such a happy relieved smile it was contagious; he didn’t have the heart to blow the staff off completely. Shigeru stirred when they entered, but stayed quiet. “He remembered this time.”

“How are you feeling Takashi?” The doctor asked softly. When Touko tried pulling her hand free to give the doctor some space, Natsume only held it tighter.

He didn’t want her to go, not this time.

“Confused,” he said, trying his best to cover the quiver in his voice. “I know my birthday is July first and I’m sixteen years old. I could’ve sworn I said that.”

The doctor smiled even more when Natsume said the answers correctly this time. “That’s correct,” he said, his smile falling shortly after. “You kept insisting you were eight and your birthday was February twenty first. We took some scans of your brain again and even ran some labs, both came back negative.”

Natsume felt his eyes tremble a bit. They came back negative, meaning they didn’t know why that happened to him?

“It’s… entirely possible that what you’re being affected by isn’t on the physical level, but on the psychological level, which is normal considering what you went through,” the doctor said, making Natsume’s trembles slow a bit. “After the Chief of Police arrives and takes your statement, I’ll see if our in house therapist has some time to see you.”

Natsume felt his anxiety rise. He didn’t want to talk about it - he refused to go back there so soon especially with people he didn’t know if he could trust!

“I’m fine,” he insisted, holding Touko’s hand back tightly. What should he do? Even if he told the Chief of Police everything, there was no way of knowing if they were part of the Yakuza or not. He learned from his mistake, the lingering pain in his left fingers reminded him.

“I understand, but it’s hospital policy for someone with your case,” the doctor informed.

Natsume didn’t care if it was hospital policy, he refused to speak to anyone outside his friends and family for now. Despite how long that list has become over the past few years, there were only a few people he felt he could rely on in this delicate situation. “I won’t talk to her,” he reaffirmed, leaving the Fujiwaras flabbergasted. They’ve never heard Natsume refuse someone in such a way before, let alone outright say no.

The doctor looked annoyed as he went to speak, but Natsume beat him to it, his throat still scratchy. “Is Natori still here?”

“Natori?” Touko asked, growing even more confused and concerned than before.

“He went home three hours ago,” Shigeru informed, scooting a bit closer. It was obvious the Fujiwaras noticed the change in his demeanor, especially with the way Touko tightened her grip around his hand. “I can call him if you’d like.”

“It’s really late, it’s probably best-”

“If he came instead, you’re right!” Touko interrupted the nurse this time. “He’s trembling - you’re trembling Takashi, please stay calm, he’ll be here soon okay?” His and Touko’s joined hands started to shake, making the teen look down. He wasn’t doing that, it was Touko-!

Shigeru quickly got to his feet and went to the other side of the bed where the doctor and nurse were. Natsume braced to feel him grab hold of his injured hand, but he didn’t. He just stood there, shielding him from the peeved nurse.

They were doing this for him.

“Sir, this isn’t protocol-”

“Putting our son into a full blown panic attack because you’re refusing what he needs to stay stable after what he went through should be against protocol,” he said sternly, eyes narrowing. “I’ll even let Natori take my place if that’ll make you happy.”

The nurse opened her mouth again, only to be stopped as the doctor gently placed a hand on her shoulder. “We’ll allow it, just this once considering what he’s been through. We’ll let the hospital staff know.” He pulled the nurse along without another word, not like they cared much.

As soon as they left, Shigure pulled out - wait, was that a cell phone? When did he get a cellphone?

“Takashi,” Touko pulled his attention away from the other, his eyes widening as she held up a small box. “We… should’ve given this to you sooner,” she sniffled, guilt evident in her voice. “But now is better than never, right?” Natsume felt himself really tremble now, very slowly lifting his hand, his wrapped fingers gently sliding across the box in her hand.

He knew what it was without needing to open it and felt guilt wrap around his heart. He never wanted them to spend this kind of money on him. “Touko-”

“Don’t Takashi, just… don’t,” she said, her eyes downcast as she tightened the trembling grip she still had around him. “Don’t worry about the money, don’t worry about paying us back. For once, please… just worry about yourself,” she begged, her eyes finally meeting his. Natsume felt tears fall past his cheeks as he saw the pure love and worry in her eyes. Reality slowly hit him from a different perspective, reminding him that his kidnapping had worried them beyond sick. When he didn’t come home, they probably feared the worst - they probably thought they’d never see him again. There were times he thought he’d never see them again…

He couldn’t say no to her, not after this. “Thank you-” he sniffled, feeling like he could burst from their kindness. “Thank you.”

“It’s not just for you, it’s for us too,” Shigeru said as he came back to the bed, smiling softly down at him. “We’ll know when you’re running late and can ask you to run errands while you’re out with your friends. And if you’re ever lost, you can use the GPS to find your way home.” Shigeru took the phone from Touko and opened the box, revealing the bright red case around the phone.

“We chose red so you won’t forget it,” he smiled, pressing a button to wake it up. “Natori programmed it for you with Tanuma and Taki’s help since we’re not tech savvy. We spoke to their parents and agreed it’d be best if you all had phones.”

Natsume’s eyes widened even more, recalling the few conversations he’s had with his friends about asking for phones. He hoped they weren’t upset with him.

“Natori said he’d be over right away,” Shigeru reassured, pulling him from his thoughts. “You know… if there’s anything you want to talk about, we’re here for you, no matter what.”

“I know,” the teen said, sniffling some more, not knowing what he ever did to deserve them as his guardians. He couldn’t tell them everything, but they at least had the right to know why he was suspicious. “I… uhm…” he averted his gaze to the sheets, his mind reeling in fear at the memory. “While I was… uhm, yeah, we escaped-” he stopped and closed his eyes, just letting himself breath for a moment as he felt himself nearly slip into a panic attack. He could do this, he had to do this. “We got to a gas station and told the clerk everything. Before he could even call for help… a cop came in… and… shot the clerk.”

Touko and Shigeru both gasped in horrified shock, to which he ignored.

If he stopped now, he wouldn’t get it out.

“They’re everywhere,” he said, taking a few deep shuddering breaths. “They... could even be here.”

They grew silent, the severity of those words sinking in. The doctor could be part of the Yakuza - the nurse and even the police officer standing guard outside could be part of the Yakuza. As long as Takashi was in the hospital, he wasn’t safe. But where could he go? He needed medical attention and they needed police searching for the one who did this to him.

“Natori… might have some ideas,” he said, finally opening his eyes a bit, though didn’t dare look up at them. “He’s an actor that knows how to stay off the radar. It’s… a long shot, but…”

Of course it wasn’t the only reason, but it was enough to make the Fujiwaras aware. More importantly, he wanted them to be safe . They killed the clerk because he was a witness. They wouldn’t hesitate to kill his foster parents and friends too.

When they didn’t respond, he clenched his injured hand’s fist as much as he could in anger - anger at his uncle, at his torturer Toma, and himself. If he hadn’t talked to those investigators, none of this would’ve happened - the Fujiwaras wouldn’t be in danger either.

And yet… he couldn’t bring himself to regret coming forward.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, trembling a bit more. “I’m sorry… because of me, you’re both in danger-”

A hand pressed against his injured one, making him quickly squeeze his eyes shut, once again waiting for pain to follow shortly after. Instead the hand quickly pulled away. “Takashi,” Shigeru said in such a serious tone it made him slowly open his eyes. It was rare to hear him speak like this. “I know we aren’t your real parents, but we’re still a family. I’m not sure how you see us, but we see you as our own son. We’ll do whatever it takes to keep you safe.” Natsume felt tears welling in his eyes again, unable to look away from Shigeru’s intense loving gaze.

They really saw him as their own child?

“He’s right,” Touko confirmed as she gently squeezed his hand. “When you… went missing, it literally felt like a part of us was torn away,” she sniffled, trying her best not to cry. “I know we aren’t perfect, we’ve never had a child of our own so we’re not really sure if we’re doing a good job or not. So when… you disappeared, we thought it was all our fault. After all, we should’ve asked the investigators if you were at risk and taken extra precautions until after the trial.” Natsume shook his head, more tears leaving him. She was wrong - there was nothing they could’ve done! “Touko-”

“We can’t change the past,” Shigeru said, making the teen turn back to him. “And saying we’ll prevent this from happening again is a lie. We don’t know what the future holds, and although we pray nothing like this will ever happen again, we don’t have the power to guarantee that. All we can do is our best to prevent it.”

Natsume was filled with so much warmth it confused him. Was this what it felt like knowing someone truly loved and cared about him? He literally couldn’t find the words as he let out a soft sob.

What did he ever do to deserve such loving foster parents? An even more selfish question: Why couldn’t they have adopted him from the start? He knew the reason - they were very distant relatives to the point of almost not being related at all. But still… he couldn’t help but feel a little selfish.

Yet after such a conversation, Natsume really wasn’t sure how to proceed from here without hurting and worrying the Fujiiwaras.

A gentle knock came at the door before it opened, revealing a disheveled out of breath Natori. His jacket wasn’t even on correctly while his glasses and hat were crooked. The Fujiwaras both smiled upon seeing him, unable to hide their relief and amusement.

“Sorry for calling you so late,” Touko bowed a bit as the actor came forward, his and Natsume’s puffy red eyes meeting.

“No no, I don’t mind at all,” he reassured as Hiiragi appeared behind him. “How are you feeling, Natsume?”

Natsume offered him a small smile, but even he knew it was a failed effort. He was starting to feel sleepy after the emotional event, which made him sigh.

Why was it so hard to keep his eyelids open now? He couldn’t fade, not this time. “I’m sorry to call you so late,” he said, taking a deep shuddering breath. “But… I need your help.”

As soon as he said help, Touko collapsed against the bed while Shigeru’s legs gave out from underneath him. Terror filled the teen as he sat up, only to yelp as sharp blinding pain erupted from his chest and branched out to every inch of his body.

When the pain finally subsided, he felt his face resting against familiar warm fur, making him calm down a bit.

“Stay still, idiot,” Nyanko scolded. “Do you want to rip your stitches out and worsen those fractures? They’re fine!” Natsume looked past the fur and saw Hinoe holding Shigeru up, having caught him before he fell.

“Sorry Natsume, we’ll give you a warning next time,” Hinoe sighed as she gently helped Shigeru into a chair, for once not cringing in disgust having to hold a man.

“Wh-what?” He stuttered, looking down at Touko who was hard to see past Sensei’s snout.

“They put them to sleep so we can talk,” Natori explained as he carefully went to his bedside. “Do you need help leaning back?” He reached forward a bit, making Natsume tense. The exorcist stopped, but didn’t let his hands retreat. “You could hurt yourself if you fall back.”

He was right, besides this was Natori, he wasn’t going to hurt him.

Taking another deep breath, he nodded. “S-sorry,” he mumbled to both of them, not meeting their gaze again.

“Don’t be, there’s nothing to be sorry for,” Natori reassured as he very slowly helped Natsume lean back. He hated how much the other tensed and wanted nothing more than to hurt the ones who did this to him. “What did you want to talk about?” He asked, careful not to bump Touko.

“I…” he bit his quivering bottom lip, furious at himself for hesitating a second time. It should be easier to tell Natori than his foster parents! “During… yeah, we escaped. We found help at a gas station, but a cop… shot the clerk that was helping us… and took us.” Natori’s eyes widened in pure horror, a look Natsume came to hate. “They’re everywhere… I think… they’re here too.” Natsume glanced over at the IV and medicine bag that was dripping into him, feeling even more tired and weak than before. He couldn’t even trust what was in the bag until he knew he could trust both the doctor and nurse. His ears were starting to ring again as he started feeling a little light headed.

“Natsume-”

“That’s not all,” he quickly interrupted, finding it harder to catch his breath. “There… were others. Toshiki, Satoshi… and a cursed god. They need our help. We… don’t have much time.” His head was starting to pound… and he was getting dizzy.

Natori couldn’t help the way he stiffened, recalling what Matoba said he saw in a vision. “Natsume, I know you hate leaving people behind, but this is a job for the police-”

“Let me finish,” the teen interrupted once more, his breathing not evening out, much to his annoyance. “It’s complicated, but… the god tied my life with Satoshi’s. If he dies, so do I.”

The second curse - the one they couldn’t lift! Everyone in the whole room grew horrified, realizing what he meant. If they didn’t save this Satoshi kid, Natsume would die.

“It’s… complicated. But it’s a train reaction,” Natsume stopped for a moment to catch his breath as his head throbbed even more. No one said anything, wanting to hear it all before interjecting. “If… Toshiki is killed, then Satoshi will die. But… when I was… rolling- no,” he brought a trembling hand up to his head as his eyesight cut in and out, the ringing slowly coming back. He couldn’t let whatever this was claim him, not yet! “Before I was rolling out of the car, I heard them talk. We were both in the van… and they said there was a countdown… to the body. I don’t… know what he meant, but... I’ve been… having these dreams-” his hand fell to his side as his eyes closed.

Natori’s eyes widened in fear as he quickly reached for the button, but Natsume gently rest a hand against his, stopping him. “Water, at a beach… slowly getting higher against me. That’s… the only clue… I have.”

“He wasn’t like this earlier,” Sensei said as his eyes narrowed in on the IV stand, obviously finding it suspicious. “The nurse changed it before you got here. He was fine and more awake until then, but that nurse didn’t seem to want you here either.” Shit, that only confirmed Natsume’s statement then.

“Take… me,” Natsume mumbled, hardly coherent against the bed, his eyes staring blankly at him. “Please… I… need to… find… give back-” Natsume’s eyes rolled up into the back of his head as his arms and legs started twitching a bit. The exorcist’s eyes widened in terror as he pushed the emergency button.

Faster than ever, the doctor and nurse came in through the door, the doctor seeming to grow even more concerned upon seeing Natsume flailing slightly. “He’s having a seizure,” he said, surprised. “There’s nothing to do but wait it out. I’ll double check the MRI, but I didn’t see anything that would warrant a seizure.” The nurse handed him the Ipad with the scan on it, to which the doctor took it and started reexamining it.

Natsume’s arms and legs slowly stopped twitching after a few minutes as his breath started regulating again. Those golden eyes fluttered open and closed a few times, obviously confused.

“Na...tori?”

The doctor handed the nurse the Ipad as he went to the bedside, taking out his flashlight again. “Don’t worry, he’s still here. Do you remember your name?”

“Takashi… Natsume,” he said as he languidly looked to Natori, trying to figure out how the doctor was suddenly back. “My birthday... is July first, and... I’m sixteen years old.”

The doctor let himself smile a bit at the answers. “Yes, very good. Your memory is still intact, but I’ll have to look at the original scan to see why you experienced a seizure.” He turned to the Fujiwaras, though frowned upon seeing them asleep. “Okay, Shuuichi Natori, since you’re here press the button again if he has another seizure. I’ll be back after reexamining the MRI.”

“Will do,” he said, his eyes not leaving the nurse who stayed quiet the whole time. He waited until they left before going back to Natsume’s side again, the youkai all around them growing tense.

“If there’s nothing on the MRI or anything weird in the IV, it might be a byproduct of the second curse,” Sensei announced with an annoyed tick in his voice.

“It’ll be lifted after I save Toshiki,” Natsume said as if it wasn’t open for discussion, feeling exhaustion starting to overwhelm him.

“After you save him? You’re not leaving this hospital unless it’s to another facility!” Sensei growled, the others glowering at Natsume for even hinting at that as well.

“We almost lost you,” Natori added, the intense stare enough to make Natsume look down at his lap uncomfortably. “Even after we found you you were possessed by a youkai none of us could sense or dispel on our own! Hinoe and Matoba had to help because a normal exorcism would’ve killed you!” His voice started getting louder and more tense, making Natsume bow his head forward a little more each time. “I know you want to help, but you need to stop and focus on yourself for once goddammit! Do you even know how injured you are? Did you know you’re still cursed?? None of us can break it without finding that damned youkai and who knows if it’s actually tying your life with that other kids!”

Natori was mad, but only because he cared about him. Despite the lecture, Natsume couldn’t help the warm smile that made its way to his face. “Thank you, Natori,” he said as he slowly looked up at him, confusing the adult greatly with his smile. “Being lectured reminds me that I have people who care about me, and that I have people I care about too. If roles were reversed, I’d be doing the same thing. But things are just a little more complicated than that…”

“Is this better?” The man’s gruff voice hissed as he tightened the ropes around Natsume's left wrist that bound him to a metal chair. Natsume languidly pulled and tugged, water dripping from his hair and onto his bleeding broken skin, but his struggles did nothing.

“Yes, father,” Satoshi stoically said as he walked up to him. Natsume felt fear run through his veins yet refused to let it show as he merely looked up at him with a determined still soaking wet face. The boy dunked his head in water once or twice just a few minutes before, but apparently not the way Toma would’ve liked, so his tormentor switched gears.

Taking out a cigarette, the man lit it and look a deep breath of it. “You still scared of thunderstorms?” Toma smirked darkly, making Natsume stiffen. How did he know that, and why was that relevant? “If it were raining we’d stick you out on top of the roof and see if lightning would find you, but since it’s clear weather we have the next best thing.”

Satoshi pulled a remote from his pocket and pointed it at him. A deep uneasy feeling nearly made him want to tremble as his mind desperately raced. He was wet, confined to a metal chair, and Toma mentioned thunderstorms?

Satoshi pressed the button, unleashing an intense burning sensation that vibrated throughout his entire body, completely paralyzing him. His insides felt like they had been set on fire only for it to be doused seconds after. A persistent deep ringing in his ears slowly came into existence as the blurry world very slowly started coming back into focus. He wanted to vomit, he wanted to pass out. Of course, none of those happened, no matter how badly he wanted unconsciousness to claim him.

A rough hand grabbed his chin and forced him to look up, his eyes meeting Toma’s which were filled with sinister pleasure. “Still with us?” He asked as he inhaled some more of his cigarette, moving his face mere inches from Natsume’s before blowing the smoke out against him. The teen was forced to cough, the action literally sending stabbing pains from his chest to the rest of his sore and fried body. Toma chuckled almost against his skin, watching in glee as Natsume’s face finally contorted in pain as he swam between consciousness and unconsciousness. “Lightning is worse, you know.” Letting go of his face, Toma took a step back, handing the other teen the cigarette. “Put it with the others.”

Natsume tried forcing his fading eyes more open, realizing it didn’t make much of a difference, he could hardly see past the black dots.

An intense heat pressed against his shoulder, forcing Natsume to let out a small cry. He tried to flinch away, but immense pain wracked his sore body, immobilizing him. It must be the cigarette, his mind supplied as Satoshi went back to his father’s side who was already smoking another one.

“You did a higher intensity than I thought, I’m proud!” His father gently nudged the other, as Satoshi merely looked down at the ground.

“Thank you, father,” he said, his voice still void of emotion.

“We’ll come back to him, let’s check on the other one.”

He heard them leave, much to his relief. They were changing targets, meaning Toshiki was next. As horrifying as that was, he couldn’t help but feel slightly thankful. He finally got a break, even if he was swimming at the edge of unconsciousness.

As much as he wanted to sleep, he couldn’t. He had to try to escape, even if he felt as horrible as this.

Taking a deep breath, he pulled on the rope again, surprisingly feeling it slightly loose. The rope felt charred, weakened by the electricity somehow.

Deciding not to question it, he pulled and pulled, slowly but surely finally pulling his wrist free. The sudden jolt made him bite back an intense hiss as his whole body reacted, feeling sharp needles nearly everywhere inside him.

The pain didn’t matter, he had a chance-!

Clumsily he moved and undid all the ropes that bound him to the chair. Every movement was pure agony, yet worth it.

Sluggishly he got to his feet and stumbled in a random direction. His world was turning and blurring together, but he didn’t let it stop him.

He could see something, it looked like a door-!

An intense heat and energy came up from behind, violently pulling him back. With a loud thud he fell to the ground as fingers wrapped tightly around his sore and raw neck. Instinctively his arms moved and scratched at the wrists, finding them very hot to the touch. His eyes finally focused on the blurry form on top of him, seeing a dirty and chipped off white oval mask covering the attacker’s face as long black hair tickled his skin. The robes were a dark brown color, completely covered and caked with both dirt and mud, making him wonder if it was originally a bright red at some point. There was also some dirty gold on his clothes and what looked like a rope tied around the top of it’s head and mask, but it was so hard to make out with his blurring vision.

This was the youkai that rushed up from behind back in the forest - this was the youkai responsible for his capture. It even had that same oozing evil aura that made it hard to breath.

“Who… are you?” Natsume somehow managed out between grunts, the hold around his neck tightening, forcing him to squeak.

“No one,” the youkai said as it leaned further down, their faces closer than before. The poison it gave off started filling Natsume’s nose, making him want to cough. His face was starting to turn pale blue, his consciousness swimming even more. “No one…” the hold around his neck slowly loosened, allowing the human to choke and sputter. He prepared to feel the poison send needles down his throat, but it didn’t happen. In fact, he couldn’t even feel it in his nostrils anymore despite the fact that the hands were still around his neck.

Slowly he opened his eyes again, seeing the youkai still on him. Now that his eyes could focus a bit, he saw the oval mask was chipped in multiple places, one of them being at his right light blue eye that held a very small speck of dark red in it.

“I’m sorry…” the youkai whispered next, those hands slowly moving away from his neck. “I’m so sorry, grandson of Reiko, but I can’t let you go.” Natsume felt his eyes widen in complete shock, the horror slowly seeping into curiosity. How did such a dark youkai know his grandmother? “When I learned who their next target was, I tried to resist, I tried to interfere as little as possible, but it kept tightening. I can’t die, not yet.”

“Die?” Natsume weakly mumbled as so many questions flooded him, his eyes slowly moving to the rope around its head. It looked very similar to the one that had bound Hiiragi; he must’ve been cursed just as she had, which meant he was being forced to do this.

“How-”

“There’s no time,” the youkai said, looking up past Natsume, back to where he had been tied. “But maybe… maybe you can help him - maybe you can help us .” Slowly the youkai leaned forward, that poison seeping into his nose again, making him feel weak. It was more intense than before; was he doing this on purpose? “I can’t help you, but will you listen to my story when we have more time?”

Natsume took a deep breath, shaking the memory away. “Shirudo used to be a normal youkai that settled in a mountain to the west, however his ability to mask presences in every way became a refuge for both humans and youkai alike who were being hunted down. All leads became dead ends, even scents animals picked up were lost. Once you’re under his protection, no one can track you down. His followers built shrines and worshiped him for decades, making him into a god. As time went on, more and more people became interested in his power. It wasn’t long until greedy humans found their way to the mountain and used his power to get away with horrific crimes. Shirudo grew furious and tracked them down, but the humans were ready. They hired exorcists who then bound him to a single family and cursed him. If he didn’t make sure the family succeeded, a rope around it's head would him.”

It went unsaid, but everyone was thinking the same thing. Humans not only took the god from his pedestal and made him lose his status, but they also forced him to do the antithesis of his beliefs. Instead of protecting innocent people, he was forced to mask the Yakuza scum as they hurt and killed thousands of innocent people. There was no doubt that he became a tainted deity; the curses on Natsume were a testament to his power.

“That explains why I couldn't pick up your scent,” Sensei growled, horribly annoyed.

Natsume gave an apologetic smile to his bodyguard, feeling bad for putting everyone through this. “We only have until the next full moon to save him. Our captor, Toma forced Satoshi to come up with a way to kill Toshiki, but he came up with a way that would give him some time to be found. In the visions, I sometimes become him. He’s in a cave on a beach, but I’m not sure which one.”

No one said anything, mostly because they weren’t sure what to say. Without being able to track the kid down, how would they find him? There were several beaches and even more caves. Searching them all would take too long. Even without the deity’s power, it would be nearly impossible for police to find the child in time. This was something only they could do.

“Despite your curse, you’re not going,” Natori said, his hair covering his face in shadows. “That god knew what state you were in, tying your life to Satoshi’s was just a sure way to make sure you died-”

“That’s not true-”

“You can’t even sit up!!” Natori snapped, making Natsume jump and shrink back into his bed. The exorcist immediately took a step back, feeling horrible for making Natsume scared.

“He’s right,” Sensei said, for once agreeing with Natori. “You always try to do things alone, but you have all of us.”

“He’s also right,” Hinoe said, sounding peeved as well. “We’ll have everyone regroup and search for Toshiki instead. It’ll be a lot easier considering we know some general areas.”

Natsume couldn’t help but blink, a little confused as he still didn’t meet anyone’s gaze. “Everyone?”

Sensei let out an annoyed grunt. “Once everyone learned you were found, they tried making their way here. The Dog’s Circle, Kai, that fox child, Benio - jeez, too many to even mention! Half of them stayed outside standing guard.”

Natsume couldn’t help it as he brought a hand up to his heart, feeling it teeming with more warmth. Even Kai and the little fox? He didn’t want to bother them with this, and he didn’t want to put their lives at risk, but for now he nodded, far too exhausted to argue with them anymore.

“Rest,” Sensei said as he gently used his snout to make sure Natsume was leaning all the way back. “You’re starting to stare again, don’t get another seizure.”

Natsume didn’t even realize he was blankly staring as he looked to Natori, who nodded. “Sorry for yelling. I’ll work with the Fujiwaras to see what we can do about keeping the Yakuza away.”

Natsume thought for a moment as he felt his eyelids grow even heavier. “The detectives… they seemed okay,” Natsume whispered as he closed his eyes, feeling himself slipping.

“Detectives?”

“The ones that first came to us,” Nyanko Sensei clarified, though his voice grew faint.

“Thank you… everyone…” yet even as Natsume drifted to sleep, he knew it wouldn’t work. There was another part to this he forget to tell them, but since Natori was there, forgetting was probably for the best.

#phage writes #natsume yuujinchou #natsume's book of friends #almost forgot to upload here fliuashdf not like anyone's reading it here but lots are on ao3 but just in case XD

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