#my thoughts are like fucking soup spilled on the ground rn.

[beagleboysinc]

we found a vet today who does at-home um. its too hard for me to say directly or i will fucking cry more than i already am. but. you know. to have us say goodbye.

we're thinking we're gonna have..only a few more days. it keeps shattering my heart with how late we caught it and how fast things are going downhill.

right now we're just. looking for signs that shes in too much pain and when to have the vet come.

[promiscuous-jalapeno]

Songbird-Ch. 5

Mystic Messenger Mafia AU 

║ch1║║ch2║║ch3║║ch4║║ch6║

Word Count: 2,407

[Violence/Murder]

~A/N: I was going to add the smut in this chapter but I decided I would separate it into it’s own, that way people that don’t want to read the NSFW can just skip it! Sorry it’s been soooo long, guys! My life is just hectic so it’s hard for me rn but I hope you enjoy this chapter! 

     "I heard you the first time, Saeyoung,” V spoke softly, his hand gripping the head of his cane as he sat unmoving in the chair.

     “Y’know, a good way to indicate you’ve heard someone is to actually reply. Just a tip,” Saeyoung snapped. “You’re being alarmingly calm about this, considering the shit storm that’s decided to roll it’s way through us.”

     V sighed, though his vacant gaze was unwavering. “I’m anything but calm. However… acting out in hysterics isn’t going to solve our problem. Talking like adults…deciding our next course of action. That’s what gets things done. Point a finger at me again, Saeyoung, and I’ll pop you in the mouth myself.”

     Though they both knew he would never, but still Saeyoung slumped down in the nearest chair with a sour face. V could barely make it out, but he knew the expression well. It had been the same since he was a child. The corners of his mouth pulled down and his brow pinched together with fury, like it’s the last face he’ll ever make, and V tried to hold back a fond smile.

     “Do you have any inkling on who it might be?” Jumin finally spoke up.

     “If I did, I wouldn't be here talking to you, now, would I?” Saeyoung huffed, not bothering to hide his annoyance.

     “Sorry to interrupt,” an unexpected voice found its way into the room.

     “Jaehee, what is it?” Jumin straightened up as she closed the door behind her.

     Her face held hesitancy and she cleared her throat before finally speaking.

     “It’s about the latest bootleg shipment. Apparently, it’s gone missing,” she reported.

     “What the fuck do you mean, missing?” Saeyoung sat up from his chair.

     “I don’t know how to make it any more clear…” she made a quick glance at Saeyoung before returning her eyes to V. “The truck never made it to the drop point. No one has seen it or heard from the driver.”

     “This is not good,” Jumin hinted.

     “No shit,” Saeyoung said, the look on his face making it clear that his gears were turning.

     The room was silent as a church, everyones eyes on each other as if thinking the same thoughts. They were in good standing with the neighboring families. Everyone knew their territories and happily stuck to them. Plenty of police force names lined their payroll…so why now?

     “It could be the coppers,” Saeyoung said with a serious face.

     “It could,” said V, “it could be a number of things.” Jumin nodded in agreement. “ First things first. Jaehee, bring me more info on this missing shipment. I don't care if you have to knock down the drivers’ mothers’ door, I want info. Find Frank, see if he’s heard of any recent booze busts.”

     “Of course,” Jaehee nodded and left the room as quickly as she could.

     “Saeyoung,” V continued, “you know what to do. I have my hands full as it is with this wedding situation.”

     “Oh yeah,” Saeyoung peeked through the blinds onto the courtyard. A crew of men were still setting up tents and tables in preparation. “Is this really the best time for this?”

     “It’s Marcos daughter, of course it’s a good time. When things get rough…that’s when we need celebration. There’s no better time to boost morale. Besides, he’s one of our best, and I seem to remember him saving your ass from a pinch more than a few times,” V smiled.

     Jumin decided to chime in. “Like his first soup job?” Both V and Jumin gave a hearty laugh. “Driving around the whole damned city with the safe in the struggle buggy,” Jumin continued, “before Marco showed up to save your ass. And how much did you end up cracking for, again?”

     “You know damn well how much,” Saeyoung sneered.

     “Then there’s no reason you can’t say it. Go ahead, hot shot. Remind us how much you swiped.”

     Saeyoung’s face turned sour, like the words were bile in his throat. “…Ten dollars,” he finally barked.

     Both of the men roared with laughter for a moment at the memory, so much so that Jumin seemed to wipe a tear from his eye.

     “Okay, okay,” V breathed in deeply when he stood from his chair, “leave the poor kid alone. Come on, let’s get some dinner.”

     He began to trail behind Jumin but paused for a moment, placing his hand firmly on the shoulder of Saeyoung and squeezing just once. His body was stiff and serious.

     “I’m trusting in you, Saeyoung. Find that son of a bitch,” V’s voice was almost a whisper, and as quickly as he had faced him he was now turned around, satisfied with his message.

     Saeyoung watched as they left, taking note of the fact that V seemed to be favoring his cane a lot more in the last few days. The weight of what that could mean fixed heavily on his shoulders, but his body remained stiff and strong with his resolve.

****

     There were joyous smiles all around as the sound of Zen’s singing filled the tent. Suddenly everyone was a hoofer, even the tough burly men could be found rolling up their sleeves and dancing with their gals to the music. It was strange to see the cities most dangerous criminals laughing and jabber-jawing, seemingly carefree. You had to admit, even you couldn't help but get out there, taking Yoosung for a time as your partner. Now you took a break, fondly overlooking the bride with her done-up chestnut hair, her and her groom with goofy smiles as he spun her around.

     “How about that food,” Jaehee walked up beside you.

     “Look at you, all dolled up!” you smiled as you grabbed at the lace of her dress, “is it because…” you gestured with your eyes to Zen.

     “It’s a wedding,” she huffed but a pink tint spread on her face, “last I heard, you were supposed to dress nice,” she said matter-of-factly. “Besides, you don’t look half bad yourself.”

     You gave her a shy thanks before she thrust a bottle into your hands.

     “Say, do me a favor and bring that bottle to my table? They’re dry but…I wanna sit and listen to the rest of this song,” she mused.

     “Whatever you say, boss.”

     The table was half empty, two women you didn’t recognize and a guy you’d seen before on various jobs. He was portly with a kind face, practically jumping for joy when you placed the bottle on the table.

     “Join us, have a drink!” he shouted and poured you a glass quickly, sliding it in front of you as you sat.

     “I’m Betty,” the blonde girl to your left produced a perfect smile. “Isn’t this party just swanky? I’d love to get a look inside that house,” she sighed, sloshing the liquid in her glass before taking a sip.

     “She means inside the bedroom, particularly,” the brunette piped up. She had quite a bit of rouge on, or perhaps she was just that drunk, you couldn’t quite tell. The waves of her hair pressed neatly against her oval face.

     “Will you quit razzing me, already,” the blonde stuck her tongue out.

     “Anthony!”

     The source of the voice was none other than Saeyoung. He and two other men approached the table in earnest.

     “Boss,” Anthony stood from his seat at once.

     Saeyoung gave him a few enthusiastic taps on the cheek as a greeting.

     “You haven’t come to say hi! Now I see why,” he laughed and winked at the ladies sitting in their seats, their bodies leaning in interest at the exchange.

     Saeyoung snatched the glass from Anthony’s hand, draining the contents into his mouth with one solid gulp. He gave an immediate look of disgust, shaking his head as he placed the cup on the table.

     “How can you drink this foot juice,” he pat the man’s broad back, “come on. I got the good stuff inside. You don’t mind if I steal him away, do you, ladies?”

     “Rhatz! No…go ahead,” they both nodded despite their pouty expressions. They were clearly hoping to be invited.  

     “Excuse me, then,” Anthony remarked before being led off by the men.

     Saeyoung tipped his hat to you before joining the other three in a laugh about something you hadn’t quite heard, their voices trailing as they made their way to the house. Something about the way that went made you feel cold. You’d never seen them interact much before. So, while everyone got lined up, occupied with giving their gifts to the happy couple, you decided to sneak off and see what they were up to. You couldn’t miss and opportunity to hear important information, and if anyone caught you, you’d just say you were looking for the powder room.

     Sure you had seen them go around this exact corner, but the grounds among the house were vast and confusing. You’d been here less than a handful of times, and never were you allowed to just wander around V’s house. The sounds of the music and chatter faded more and more, until you found a door slightly ajar.

     Your chest tightened with adrenaline and you stilled your breathing before peeking in the crack. The first thing you saw was Anthony, bloody faced and curled over on the floor, followed by a low hum of voices. A swift kick landed on his chest, the foot belonging to none other than Saeyoung.

     “It’s just like I said,” Antony hacked between his words, “the c-cop is my neighbor…our…our daughters play together…that’s all,” his hand gripped at his chest and his large frame began to shiver with pain. “I don’t know n-nothin about-“

     Saeyoung cut him off, bending down and grabbing Anthony by the collar.

     “You know what I think? I think you’re a fucking liar. I think you know a lot of things, things you might have told that cop friend of yours. And I just can’t have that,” he puffed a heavy breath of air before bringing his fist down thrice on the side of the mans face. “You fucked with my money.”

     It was a pain like no other creeping inside of you. Watching another person get beat, knowing it could be…should be you, instead. The guilt of it all was too much to handle. This man had a wife…a daughter. Sickness threatened to rise up and spill from your mouth.

     Saeyoung pulled a gun, his fingers readying it with a harsh click. Piss soiled the front of Anthony’s pants, streams of pleading words jumbled together through tears. However, the gun pointed swiftly towards the door. Towards you. All you could manage was a gasp before the trigger was pulled.

     The bullet blast through the door just above your head, raining shards of wood into your hair. After taking a moment to remember how to breathe, you kicked the door open, letting your rage take over.

     “Did you seriously just fucking shoot at me?!” you let out an exasperated scream.

     “Depends,” he stood up, dropping a now passed out Anthony back onto the floor and facing you with a calm expression, “did you seriously just fucking eavesdrop.”

     “Are you out of your fucking mind?” you said shakily.

     “Relax,” he drew the word out in a joking manner, “it’s not like I hit you,” he said casually, shrugging his shoulders.

     “She’s right,” another man spoke up, “what if V heard…we’d be in a shit load of-“

     “Ugh,” Saeyoung groaned, “you guys are too serious. No one heard, the music is too loud and they’re all drunk anyway.”

     He nudged at Anthony with his foot, the body still limp and unmoving.

     “Get him out of here and finish him, he smells like piss,” Saeyoung said.

     The two men each carried an end, hastily removing him from the room. And then it was silent for a moment.

     “Are you gunna keep staring at me or you gunna say what you wanna say?” Saeyoung broke the silence.

     “You have blood on your sleeves,” you quietly pointed out.

     Saeyoung inspected his arms. “So I do,” he rolled them up to conceal the stains before grabbing a towel to wipe his knuckles.

     More silence hung heavy in the room.

     “What if you’re wrong?”

     “About?” Saeyoung replied curtly.

     “Anthony. What if you’re wrong…won’t you feel bad?”

     “Now why would I go and feel something like that?” he smiled quizzically.

     “You can’t possibly be that cruel.”

     “And how do you know what I’m like,” he threw the towel before turning to you. “One mans life means nothing in comparison to what we have built. I’ll do what I have to to keep us alive.”

     “Even if that means killing the innocent?”

     “Doll, none of us are innocent.”

     That may be true, but it didn’t mean someone deserved to die. Laws are in place for a reason. The way they operated was barbaric, but of course you couldn’t say that. Not unless you wanted to end up in the same body bag as Anthony.

     “You’re too trusting. That’s how you end up dead, don’t forget that. Why do you care so much how I feel, anyway?” Saeyoung asked, stepping a bit closer to you.

     “I…I don’t know,” you admitted.

     Why did you care? You had a desperate need to know he had some good in him. Something about his character drew you in. Sometimes, when you were together, you could even forget that you both were on opposing sides.

     “Why are you here?” his voice was bold, his feet carrying him even closer to you.

     “I don’t know,” you said once again.

     His hand brushed the soft skin of your cheek, wiping at the rouge. “Are you stuck on me?”

     His face softened and the corners of his mouth formed a small smile. He held still, waiting for you to say something, anything. As much as you wanted to deny it, you couldn’t ignore the rapid beating of your heart at his touch. The look on your face must have said it all.

     Ever so slowly he pressed his lips against yours into a surprisingly gentle kiss. When you didn’t pull away, each kiss became rougher, all the built up tension releasing into this single act. He pressed himself against you and you moaned softly, realizing you had wrapped your hands around his neck at some point and pulled him closer.