#my thing is like... i dont want people writing about certain topics but i also know that i cant stop people

[mbat]

honestly my biggest wonder about yesterdays drama was like... who even was that? not the person being called out, but the one calling them out. like, its one thing to make a throwaway to make a callout post, but to go on anon and try to pull unrelated people into it? this was clearly someone still in the taleblr server since they had screenshots from literally the same day in their callout

this isnt me taking sides because genuinely i have more important things to worry about than all that, but its different when it comes to this person because like... i just thought yall were different than that? maybe we all dont totally consider eachother friends entirely but i liked to think we were all somewhere around there for the most part

theres only so many of us and we all try to stay chill (to more or less success) because like... theres probably less than 100 of us left, and we're all adults by now as far as i know, and i know age doesnt really equal maturity, but its just so immature to try and stir drama by messaging unrelated parties.

honestly even if the person told me in private who they were its not like id make shit worse by posting about them or something because, again, i have bigger things to worry about, im just curious at this point. its not even an obligation for them to come forward, im just admitting that im curious.

if anything all i have to say is be the bigger person and block and move on when you dont like someone or something someone did. i get that you saw stuff that you found gross and you wanted everyone to feel the same way you did, but the rest of us just want to live our lives. plus i think the people that were messaged arent even in the discord so it was honestly even weirder to do that

ive had my fair share of seeing things that made me feel gross to see or read or know about, like, seriously i found out one of my friends was a pedo last year (and i promptly blocked the cunt). but it doesnt do anything to pull other people into the mess and try to start shit.

basically, just be more mature, cause i know yall are better than that. you dont have to read fics that you dont like, and you dont have to interact with people you dont like. your online experience is yours and the best option is always to block and move on. ive had my fair share of drama, and all it does is ruin peoples days, and not much else.

my biggest point, honestly, is that this is such a small fandom and i dont want whats left to come crashing down because some drama makes everyone left hate it here. i dont care whos right or wrong because literally whatever its internet drama, i just dont want this community to die out.

[noblest-roman-of-them-all]

Some of y'all can't handle the concept of certain abuses existing in the first place, muchless a character who went through that abuse and is now showing realistic symptoms of said abuse.

"we need more traumatized characters/characters with ptsd and/or who are abuse victims portrayed realistically with symptoms that Arent cute and soft and pretty!" you guys couldnt even handle lapis lazuli

[mimikyuno]

trans representation: my hopes and fears about mizuki5 🏳️‍⚧️

im writing this post so that i can keep a record of all of my current thoughts on the upcoming n25 event, which im fairly certain will come soon (september?). i just. i have a lot of thoughts on this topic and i wanna share them before the event drops.

disclaimer: i am tme, and while i am not cis, i am not transfem.

depiction of transfeminine characters in anime has been quite… how do i even put this into words. trans women are depicted as either a joke, or as an “otokonoko” which for brevity’s sake let’s translate to femboy (i highly recommend on reading on the history of the term though). the trope of “tr*ps” was quite common, and used for comedic effects. i think of ruka from steins;gate, who is clearly a trans woman; she has dysphoria, asks okabe to go back in time so she can be born biologically female etc. yet, her womanhood is never taken seriously. “she’s a dude after all.”

i have already written a small post about the history of the “otokonoko” label and the way trans women consistently get third gendered in the anime scene so i won’t repeat myself. the thing is, many transfem characters i have seen in anime are either uncracked eggs or, when out, are often not taken seriously by the rest of the cast. a lot of transfem characters i know of fall in between being an uncracked egg and being out; these would be the very many “girly boys” who identify as male, while living their lives as women and being happy about passing, while people around them who know about their agab either treat them as men or third-gender them. for example, kuranosuke from kuragehime stays an egg throughout the series. as i mentioned in a previous post, i see makoto from the currently airing senpai wa otokonoko as a closeted trans girl struggling with internalised transphobia. she has dysphoria, is happier and feels like her “real self” when presenting as a girl, displays gender euphoria when she passes, and more. narratively, she is coded as a girl. i havent read the manga, but i know the author drops the ball, and makoto never gets to come out in the series.

i can only think of a handful of trans women who are both out AND are taken seriously within the narrative. for example hana from tokyo godfathers, nao-chan from skip and loafer, or isabella from paradise kiss (iirc). though i have not watched these anime, i know that lily from zombieland saga, alluka from hxh, seiko from lovely complex and shuuichi from wandering son also tick both the “out of the closet” and “taken seriously” categories.

the situation is slightly different in manga. in manga, i have always found more trans representation (both transmasc and transfem). however, before we move on to mizuki, i really want to talk about one of my favourite mangas, namely “love me for who i am”, aka fukaboku (anime adaptation when ;-;). this manga revolves around mogumo, a non binary teen who is struggling to make friends. their classmate, a cis boy, mistakes mogumo for an otokonoko, and invites them to work at the crossdressing cafe that his sister (a trans woman) owns. mogumo is initially upset; they are not a girly boy, they are non binary. mogumo is reassured that the cafe is a place for people to be who they are, and they dont have to identify as an otokonoko to work there. this strikes a nerve with mei, one of the kids working there, who is a closeted trans girl. throughout the manga, these characters all come to be more and more unapologetically themselves. lgbt themes are addressed constantly (they even go to a pride parade!!) and the trans women depicted in this manga are some of the best written ones i have come across. because they are actually acknowledged as women.

the reason why i want to talk about fukaboku before discussing mizuki, is that the 4 kids who work at the cafe cover the spectrum of “crossdressing boys” we usually see in anime, though taking it a step further with mogumo and mei. firstly we have ten-chan. he mostly identifies as a boy. he likes anime and manga and cosplaying, he’s into girls (but also hinted to bi maybe? i need to reread this), and he’s an adorable weirdo. to him, dressing as a girl in the cafe is fun, clothes have no gender to him. then there is sou, who is gay and also identifies with his agab. sou has a boyfriend, and the cafe is the only place where he gets to gush about him and feel accepted. he likes cute clothes but always dresses masculinely outside the cafe. then there’s mogumo. as mentioned, mogumo is non binary. they like cute things, so they sometimes like feminine clothes like the maid uniform they wear at the cafe, but they actually prefer a cute androgynous style (they often wear shorts instead of skirts). lastly, mei (my fave, my daughter, light of my life). at the beginning of the manga, mei is a closeted trans girl. initially, she resents mogumo for rejecting the “girly boy” (otokonko) label that she thought she had to embrace to survive and be who she is. thanks to mogumo’s courage, and the guidance of two older trans women (one of which is the owner of the cafe and the other is her friend, who works in fashion), she finds a more stable sense of herself, and canonically and textually identifies as a girl.

AND NOW, onto mizuki. first things first, i see her as a trans girl. her struggle with her identity, the way she presents, her history of bullying, dysphoria (the covered mirrored), and depression (in middle school, before transitioning), visual metaphors (all the pink and blue symbols, i should make a post about this tbh) all hint at her being trans. i really dont think mizuki is an otokonoko; typically, in anime narrative, when there is an otokonoko, the fact is revealed early on, and the struggles are about being accepted as a boy who dresses like a girl or as a funny gag (tr*p). tbh, i think it wouldnt make sense for mizuki to be an otokono. if she were, her main struggle would be to accept that she wants to dress as a girl. once accepted, the arc should be resolved. and she wouldn’t be scared to say “hey im a boy” when people assume she’s a girl. especially with niigo? they met online when she was still pre-transition, if she was an otokonoko it would have made more sense if niigo thought she was a boy, and then irl saw that she looks like a girl and THAT would have been the obstacle. but that is not the case with mizuki. she is happy in people assuming she is a girl, and is terrified of being outed. that is not in line with the trope of otonoko. in fukaboku, we have two characters who are Actually “girly boys”, ten-chan and sou, and neither are like mizuki at all. they dont present femininely with their family nor at school. mizuki is way more similar to mei, when it comes to gender presentation and identity. characters who are similar to mizuki from other media and who dont identify as girls all share the same trait: they are commonly regarded as eggs.

my hope for mizuki5, is that she gets to come out as trans to ena and the rest of niigo. mizuki being confirmed trans, indirectly or not, would make the most narrative sense, looking at her story, imagery, and the build-up for the reveal. and while i desperately hope this is the case, i am overwhelmed by fear. times are changing in the anime scene, and we got canonically gay and trans characters in similar games (the lesbian couple in d4dj or the trans girl in enstars). however, project sekai is massive in japan, and quite renowned internationally too. and that comes with expectations and pressures. when gundam witch from mercury finished airing, bandai namco had to issue a statement that the relationship between miorine and suletta was “up to interpretation”, despite the fact that the two literally get married. gundam is also a huge franchise, and bandai namco chose to issue a statement that would give them plausible deniability. not only is project sekai huge, but as i previously mentioned, representation of transfeminine characters overwhelmingly labels them as an otokonoko. i think the label of “otokonoko” is very useful when it comes to plausible deniability in media; u can see this character as a closeted trans girl, or as a crossdressing boy. you pleased the transgenders, and you pleased the transphobes. expect, u didnt please us. im gonna say it, i hate the crossdressing boy trope in animanga. in most instances, it’s a way to deny the character their identity, and in others, it’s treated as a means (willingly or not) to perpetrate violent and harmful transmisogynistic jokes and stereotypes. tho i will admit, i love a lot of “otokonoko” characters, tho for my mental health i tend to view as transfem nb or just trans women.

project sekai, with the massive reach it has, has the opportunity to give its audience a canonically transfem character. a character who is a fan favorite, whose story has, so far, been handled with so much love, kindness and understanding. mizuki could become the new standard, she could change the way transfem characters are portrayed in mainstream animanga for real. i know we have to let go of the expectations that queer characters have to verbally and explicitly state their identity for them to be taken seriously by the audience but fr i hope this will be the case for this event. i dont think most people would get it otherwise, and will just keep seeing mizuki as an otokonoko. which is in itself sad; being cishet is such a default, that gay and/or characters who never explicitly come out are either misunderstood or seen as a sign of “queerbaiting” (dont get me started on yuribaiting and how insane some of y’all are calling a show with gay women “yuribait” if they dont kiss or say “I AM A HOMOSEXUAL WOMAN).

mizuki’s and ena’s VAs told us to please be kind and understand the characters in preparation for the upcoming event. i hope they go for it. i really, really do. this could for real be a huge game changer in the industry. i see how project sekai keeps inspiring other shows and games (i should make a post about this too lol), so i hope mizuki won’t be third gendered, or shoved into the otokonoko label. i hope she gets to be herself. a girl. and be accepted as one by ena and the rest of niigo. it could be huge. or it could be a flop. no in between. which is why im both excited and terrified of this event. SEGA pls-

[analgesic-comic]

Hii i just came to communicate a thing or two.

And also im curious witu you guys opnions.

First of all, i will remind yall that my comic will most likely have no ships in it. Even if i love them i dont want to put them into it cause i want to talk about something more serious now we come to the second topic.

Analgesics will be a comic about HEALING, Jimmy is mentally ill, and i want to write about him becoming a better person and starting to acknowledge his actions.

I dont want to spoil anything about the comic, but jimmy is honestly my second favourite character, and even if i despise him, i would like people to acknowledge that i will be portraying improvement and becoming better as the main important part of the comic.

I do believe Jimmy is awful, but i do also believe he also regrets his mistakes and that he feels guilt over his actions to a certain extent, that doesn't make what he did good, but does mean he is not just a psychopath. Understanding a character doesn't mean pitying or condoning his actions. So even if i do believe he feels bad about it, it doesn't believe i dont think he doesn't deserve the hate he gets.

Anyway, as im writing and drawing, i would like to know if Anya should keep the child or not? i want to know that for future chapters

[dr-spectre]

Introduction Post!

Hey all! I'm Dr. Spectre! (can call me spectre if you wish.) 20 years old, very big yapper and love to discuss topics relating to Splatoon. Sometimes i might switch it up if I'm feeling bored. (E.G. Sonic the Hedgehog or any other gaming franchises)

-MINORS! BE FOREWARNED! SOMETIMES I TALK ABOUT CONTENT NOT SUITABLE FOR YOU AND I SWEAR A LOT!!! I will give warning if I wanna talk about something not safe for minors. So yeah BE CAREFUL WHEN GOING THROUGH MY BLOG! DO NOT INTERACT WITH POSTS THAT I MARK AS NSFW!!!! OKAY?!?!?!

-Writer & Essayist - Love coming up with various different concepts and ideas and writing them down in any way I can. Sometimes I do analyses on certain things relating to Splatoon or any other gaming franchise I'm very into at the moment!

-I do not reblog other people's posts as I treat this page like a personal diary for me and a way for me to express my thoughts. I dont wanna clutter it with other stuff unless i want to reblog an older post of mine. But feel free to reblog my stuff!!!!!

-Please feel free to ask me anything you want in the ask box! However, that doesn't mean I am obligated to respond to your ask. I may just delete it and move on so keep that in mind.

If you wanna watch a guy go on long tangents, ramble about Splatoon and go into deep dives into the story and writing of Splatoon then feel free to follow! You are allowed to disagree with points and views that i share but you must be respectful and polite about it, if you are i MAY respond and we can have a discussion if you wish!

(also a big callie fan i love her so much omfg ghfjdjsjsj shhhhhh!!!!! Don't tell anyone tehehehe....)

IMAGE DONE BY: @fuzzyoctoplushie

[theunbrightside]

(this is not a fanfic, if that is what you are looking for, please scroll on by)

hello everyone, i would like to put my two cents onto the internet for everyone so they can look at the perspective of my own thoughts. alot of people are not going to LIKE this, but, whatever your two cents about this topic is also appreciated! you are totally free to put your opinion on this topic as well. however, your opinion will not be considered valid if you did not read the entire post.

TLDR: please dont pretend to care about minors on your blog if you use "minors dni" or "age in bio" it is NOT the correct way to combat minors. infact, its stupid. you cannot use "minors dni" as a way to combat minors. you also cant use "age in bio" as a way to combat minors, its dumb and as an adult, you should know that it's dumb, which really makes me question if alot of fanfic writers are actually the adults they claim to be.

given that the statement is true, there are two possible options for the people who use this statement on their own blog; they are either REALLY oblivious, or they don't care about minors in their spaces as much as they say. to be honest, i think they care more about how many notes they get.....they just also want to look like the good guy at the same time. before i start the yap session, i would like to make it clear who i am blaming and adressing in this post, if you are not mentioned, you do not apply..... i am blaming ADULTS who write PORN and PRETEND to care about MINORS reading their content when they don't use the NEEDED PRECAUTIONS in order to keep them out.

I am NOT saying you need to care about minors reading your content. As long as you are following the rules of tumblr, you can post whatever you want. you also need to understand that it goes the other way around, people can read whatever they want to, that includes the contents of your blog.

if you DO care, you can't be fucking stupid about it, you need to take the VERY IMPORTANT REQUIRMENTS in order to do so.

minors, i know you read the porn on tumblr, and you can because alot of the adults don't care about you reading their content. however they act like they do, which makes me angry if you think you are mature enough, you have the ability to do so. this is not meant to target you, it's meant to target the adults for trying to act like a saint while being the problem at the same time, okay? (tw large amounts of opinionated yapping. oh boy i might be ambushed for this....oh well)

given that obliviousness is one of the options here, i will explain my standpoint as to why it is stupid. this is tumblr. and alot of you are writing porn around a fandom that gravitates towards minors, especially certain anime. ESPECIALLY ones like my hero academia, demon slayer, jjk, those type of things. YES, i am aware adults also watch anime, and some adults want to read porn about their favourite characters in said anime. but do you want to know who reads porn about their favourite characters more than adults do? MINORS! and because most of you have a really airheaded way of combating minors, guess who the main consumer of your content is??? MINORS! it's mostly minors reading your content, sorry to break it to you. and i have decided to point the finger here, people who write about MHA are the absolute worst when it comes to this situation. because not only are you creating a toilet paper wall to "stop" minors from reading your content, you are writing porn where the fandom is pretty much all teenagers and some young adults. AND ON TOP OF THAT! MOST (keyword most) of the characters you are writing porn about are literal minors in the show! LIKE??? i personally dont care too much if it stops you from writing porn about ACTUAL children....but like...please do not pretend to care about minors reading your content it pisses me off if you actually want minors out of your blog, I have a solution for you! let me help you! Solution, promote your writing with SFW content only on your tumblr blog, and put your NSFW content behind a wall that requires age verification. you have multiple ways to do that! for example, use something like patreon, or if you want to bump it up a notch, use something that requires genuine age verification, like an ID. the down side? you won't be as popular, infact you'll most likely be unpopular! and you will realize how little the amount of adults in your blog are, because your likes will be VERY LOW on your nsfw content. but.....that's okay! as long as minors aren't in your blog! ....right?

[mihai-florescu]

Putting a message i sent earlier under a read more, it has some thoughts ive expressed before tho. ES, of course

My thoughts as an EichiP... i view ! and !! as different stories in the way they're approached tbh, what i fell in love with enstars for was the character driven storytelling of one event seen through different perspectives, where you see the antagonist in one perspective become a protagonist in another story and can empathize with the entire cast like this. I fell in love with eichi's story of second chances, getting what you want and regretting your actions in the process, redemption, desperation, overcoming fate and asserting one's self into the story, saving a school in a dying industry that saved your life by giving you a dream; i consider it an arc fulfilling to the reader at the end of ! era. But we still had to continue... and it's not like we didnt get inklings of eichi's dreams of idol utopia, the idol soldier idea goes back to main story 1, but !! loses the charm of the original series through expanding the worldbuilding so much and shifting to a plot driven story that opens 10 cans of worms instead of offering resolutions. There's not really room to breathe if the stakes just keep getting higher and higher...

As for the colonisation plotline, it's been here since the beginning of ES2. The SS arc makes it obvious, but i remember even before, the talks about ES taking over from local businesses, trying to be seen as the standard, it was always the direction ensemble square as an institution would take. But the "antagonist in one story, protagonist in another" approach doesnt work anymore with such subjects. The guys responsible for this are your coworkers you share dorms with. I read the stories but cant empathize anymore, so i've been feeling disconnected from eichi for a while. I see enstars with eichi at its core but i didnt care for his center event, i read it, didnt like the ending, and overall felt off. Eichi becoming the villain of ! to attone for the war kind of loses significance if a year later he is a cartoon villain idol colonialist you can't even sympathize with anymore because of the magnitude of events. However i do think !! has done good things for some characters pushing them further or developing them in a way ! didnt. But for others...

I also have my issues with sci fi elements becoming the norm, even taken metaphorically or as hyperboles, when one of the central themes i love about enstars is humanity. Then again, i am a war era fan that relied on manipulating human desires and perceptions, and the fact that there were no monsters or gods, just humans framed as such, playing on people's fears and beliefs, it's a bit jarring to me to have them introduce AIs forming from escaped comatose brains (im minimizing the switch climax rn, i didnt even hate it as a whole, just this resolution im unhappy with)

It also feels like we've lost some of the meta aspects of the writing i liked, a certain awareness of being characters in a story and there being an audience. But im still struggling to word my thoughts on this matter. I felt it present in main story 2, even if it annoyed me at parts in its obviousness ("good thing we're not protagonists, no one would want to read about us" youre right aira you are not interesting to me. And yet i'll read your story to try and empathize nevertheless. I have other thoughts on aira too, perhaps for another time). I wish we explored a bit more what it means to no longer be the central protagonist, from trickstar's perspective...and brought back the successors topic. But i havent read every ts story yet so i'd be foolish to complain before really making sure i've checked everything. To me ! ended satisfyingly with room left for elaborations and imagination, but i dont feel like !!'s ending is really ending anything at all. Not necessarily bad since it's not like the game is shutting down, but overwhelming worldbuilding wise while underwhelming character wise...

Let's see... im not sure how to end this. Just a bit of a stream of consciousness as a ! fan who still loves enstars despite my critiques. Mainly, well, no one's gonna take away the stories that already exist that i do love and impacted my life greatly. And i do think !! had some really good things too it brought, or at least stories i hold dear too. Change is scary and i don't think it's always for the best, but it's also fun to see where it goes next...

[petricorah]

i wanna start making comics but like. i dont really know how??? are there any tips that you could give me perhaps?

hi!

i've been working on trying to compile a list of resources for people (@aangsfrogs--i didn't forget!) who want to make comics for a long time. It would consist of some of my personal tips and a lot of links to other people's PDFs and youtubes. But that's...a hefty project, so if you had any specific questions for the meantime, my askbox is open!

But, for just beginning, here would be my tips:

Read comics. Read manga and webcomics and cartoons and medical comics. There is so much out there, and reading is such a big way to learn. If you see something you like, take a moment to think about why you like it. Are the expressions or colors appealing? Did it make you feel a certain emotion? Analyze what the artist may have done to get across what they did. (Is it the camera angle? the style they chose to draw in? the paneling? the pacing? the color? etc.) Doing this over time will help you recognize the tools available for telling stories through this medium, and you'll be able to put them in your own work.

Try to think about what you want to make comics about. What moves you? What topics interest you? What ideas or tropes do you love in media or think about often? What do you hate and wish was done better? What characters are you drawn to, or what characters do you want to create? (What about them compels you?) I find it's hard to create an idea out of thin air, but if you start writing down random ideas you have, you'll start thinking about them, and over time, you'll have a bank of things to pull from when you want to create.

Lastly, anatomical skill or knowledge of color does not a comic make! You don't have to know much to begin, and there aren't rules. Just start drawing what is meaningful to you!

This is just cursory and doesn't get into super specifics like paneling or scripts or plotting or colors or thumbnailing or....etc, but I'll try to expand my list of resources and get that out! And, hmu if you have any specific questions on topics!

happy drawing~

Book list under readmore:

Scott McCloud's Understanding Comics and his Making Comics. These books are taught in like, every comic class ever. While not my complete favorite, they do a good job of showing some history and fundamentals, and how easy it is to make comics even if you don't have a lot of drawing experience.

99 Ways to Tell a Story: Exercises in Style by Matt Madden: Really good if you don't know how to start analyzing comics. (Also it's just a fun visual exercise.) It shows the same short story done in 99 different styles with different emphasis on different moods and points of view.

The PreHistory of The Far Side: A 10th Anniversary Exhibit by Gary Larson and The Calvin and Hobbes: Tenth Anniversary Book by Bill Watterson: Two great books with work from my two favorite cartoonists. They both have writings from the author about getting ideas, developing stories, and being a comic artist.

Uncanny Bodies: Superhero Comics and Disability, edited by Scott T. Smith and José Alaniz and Black Comics: Politics of Race and Representation, edited by Sheena C. Howard and Ronald L. Jackson II: These two aren't really about making comics, but they are great collections of analysis about old and new comics alike.

By no means a complete list, but some good ones that I can think of off the top of my head.

There's also the book Webtoon School: Everything you need to know about webtoon creation and story writing. To be honest, I didn't read this completely through because it was a bit more fundamental than I was expecting, but it gives a good cursory look of how to write comics if you're just starting out! It covers some history, how to write stories and arcs, etc.

Also, look to your favorite writers! A lot of webtoon/webcomic artists do tutorials or youtube videos. for instance, velnxi has this great tutorial up I really suggest looking at here.

[melloneah]

this is all for the writer ask!!! :3 hope it's not too much >_<" answer the ones you're comfortable answering and don't force yourself to answer all of them if you don't want to! <3

🌵🥤🌻🍄📚 🍬🔪🥐🏜🦋🐝🧩

EHEHEHEHEHHE NEVER TOO MUCH THANK U SMMMMMM 🌵 ⇢ share the link to a playlist you love

i dont really listen to premade playlists, so ill link mine >:333 this is a playlist i made for a roadtrip to berlin, including all the songs i was listening to at the time, and ive since been adding new ones actively, so it's literally just a huge list of everything i love :D 🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

first of all gonna plug my besties ofc @levi-dayne writes sick ass fics for death note @uriekukistan writes amazing itafushi angst (and not only :33) SENDING BOTH OF THEM SMOOCHES GO READ THEIR STUFF! and a fic that id read recently and LOVEDDD was all about love by fullvoid (@casgore on here :3) the yuuji characterisation broke my heart - it was a gutwrenchingly real way of depicting mental illness, and i loved seeing how different he acted around people vs alone. and it was super cool seeing a healed megumi helping yuuji rather than the other way around!!! HIGHLY RECOMMEND!!!!

🌻 ⇢ tag someone you appreciate but don't talk to on a regular basis FIRST OF ALL U!!!!!! i love the mutual interactions THANK U FOR BEING HERE!!!! @alonelystargazer is very sweet and i interact with her pretty regularly i feel :3 THANK U FOR INTERACTING WINNIE!!!!<3 cant think of anymore rn but if i do i WILL edit this post TRUST 🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

megumi likes penne but yuuji hates it so they always disagree over pasta shape if theyre making it for dinner. yuuji always wins bc his favourite is spaghetti and obviously everyone likes spaghetti so megumi doesnt bother fighting him on it 📚 ⇢ what's the last thing you wrote down in your notes app? 

HEHEHEHEH nervous. lets see "what kinda gay shit goes on around here when im not around" LMAO the choso x todo wip in action. what a quote thank u past me. you'll find out the context once i post it sjdhfgsjhfks

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

hmmmmm from random shit i think like. 1980s window designs in england lmaooo

🥐 ⇢ name one internet reference that will always make you laugh 

answered here :333

🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

ARRGRHRG ANY COMMENT. i get so excited u cant even imagine. i sometimes type 'AO3' in my gmail just to delude myself that i got a comment and get that little pang of joy seeing the notif 😭 my favvvv must be ones that quote certain lines tho bc then im like HEY!!!! I WROTE THAT!!!! U LIKED THAT??? DUDE UR NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS I WROTE IT

🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately

i feel like an everpresent topic ive had on my mind especially often for the last year is kindness. there's a multitude of things i could say, whether that's bashing people for lacking it, or get all teary over how beautiful it is (which!! it is!!!) but i think what ive recently discovered is that it's my only constant :3 when everything else goes wrong, that's all i have, and im really happy it's second nature to me (altho im still actively working on making myself better!!!!)

yeah, maybe everything sucks right now, but i know i can make someone else's day better :3 and often it makes things a little more okay to me too

🐝 ⇢ tag your biggest supporter(s) and say one nice thing about them

RAHHGHG BESTIES. question for the bestiessss

@levi-dayne is so dear to my heart!!! such a sweet and kind person, who truly and deeply cares about others!!!! makes music, writes well AND ALSO DRAWS??!!! amazing and super talented person with super high ambitions too!!! SO SLAYFUL. what did i do to deserve such a slayful friend<333

@uriekukistan is one of the most naturally talented ppl i know!!!!! they write amazing fics, can DANCE super well, and took up drawing like 3 seconds ago and are already churning out really cool stuff on a fucking TOUCHPAD. ON THEIR LAPTOP. gofundme for rin graphic art kit when?? also ofc. a really good friend and very kind person :3333 <333

ILYSM BESTIESSSS

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

from a writing style perspective: first person and tense switches

from a content perspective: anything fucked up like noncon or incest....how tf are they often not tagged like??? or putting that at the bottom of the warnings list 😭 oh yea im far more concerned about swearing and underage drinking......

something im picky abt that sometimes annoys me enough to click off but i feel like it's just a weird personal preference is the overuse of alternatives to a characters name. so using "the brunette" like 5 times. just say his name!!!!! it's ok!!!!!

RAHHHHHH i usually reread my answers before i post but not this time. adios fuckers i dont remember what bullshit i wrote here but ur left with the consequences. if u wanna deal with even more of my terrible takes ASK ME STUFF

[suzukiblu]

It feels a little weird and awkward to say this but thank you? For doing so much accidental baby acquisition/baby acquisition stuff in general? Its kinds always been my favourite thing to both read and write (has consistently been for over 10 years now) but people seem to majorly have a thing against it (especially when the parents are teens, which like, kinda fair because thats not SUPPOSED to happen irl, but thats also what makes it so interesting to explore in fiction yknow? Especially as a teen pregnancy baby myself) so I always feel very discouraged from writing that stuff. People go on and on about "kids not being a mandatory life step that everyone wants to do, stop giving these characters kids" and I'm just sitting here, absolutely certain I'll never want kids myself, wanting to explore the topic in fiction, and feeling super hurt by that. Why cant those people just leave it alone if they don't like it? What happened to dont like dont read? Why do they have to pick on people who write these topics?

That got a little venty, sorry

Anyways, I just really want to thank you for writing kidfics so often, as weird as that is. I've only been following you for a month but its already made me start feeling better about my own writing and favourite tropes. Its dumb to let assholes get to me, but they do start wearing you down after 10 years yknow?

Thank you, I'm so glad you're liking my stuff! And don't sweat it on the venting, I get it, lol. Sometimes you just gotta vent some.

Honestly I was kinda meh on kidfic/baby acquisition fics when I was younger and tended to go the "don't like/don't read" route on them myself, but these days it's just kinda helpful to be able to get out some of my feels about both how I was parented and how I'm very unlikely to ever BE a parent despite having previously wanted to, so like, accidental baby acquisition especially has just been REALLY vibing with me as a genre. Like--in the sense of if I ever end up with a kid myself, it almost definitely will BE unplanned and accidental, and also in the sense of my feelings about the idea of making a very deliberate Choice about being a parent, as opposed to just kinda doing it as another checklist item on the list of expected things you just do as you go through life.

Also I'm glad to hear you're feeling better about your writing, it's nice to hear I could help with something like that. ❤ I've been very lucky with the reception I've gotten for my stuff, generally speaking my readers either just don't engage with what they're not into or tell me "hey I'm not even into this, but actually I really enjoyed the way you did it once I tried it". So like, usually I prescribe to the theory of writing about things I care about and trying to be honest and not self-censor too much about the feelings and thoughts I have on those topics, and just try to let my audience find me via tags and word of mouth. If there's people who aren't into my preferred genres, then they can just go play in their own corner of the sandbox and I'll play in mine.

Plus fuck it, man, I just like writing cute kids and also working out personal trauma and helping other people just, like, get the catharsis of reading a healthy parent-child relationship. It just feels good, y'know?

[wygolvillage]

a new year's resolution

well, as of 2024 i’ve decided i will no longer be posting on tumblr... this shouldnt be the hugest surprise since ive been pretty critical of staff, the over-monetization of the website, the site culture, and the user experience for the past year and gradually reducing my time spent scrolling the ol’ dashboard- ive even mentioned my intent to eventually leave; well, that eventually is now! gradually ive found myself analyzing the effect that using tumblr for 7+ years has had on me, and the effects of social media in general.

ive never had to write a goodbye letter like this before. while ive joined and left several online platforms over the years, its always been a gradual fade in interest rather than a conscious decision to stop. never have i used a platform as long as ive used tumblr, over 1/3 of my life. ive grown up with tumblr, for better or worse. how do you write a goodbye for that? i guess ill have to try my best. because as important as tumblr was for me, ive recognized the way its hurt me too.

finding other avenues of online self-expression particularly has made me think a lot about this. when i edit my website i feel accomplished, happy, and content, feeling i have put something of myself out into the world, my seed to grow and garden to tend. when i scroll through tumblr i feel as if my brain is mostly idle, and when i do emotionally respond its often out of anger or annoyance, because anger = engagement and social media sites like tumblr WANT engagement. particularly because i have OCD ive found myself upset by certain aspects of tumblr discourse culture, as well- it is basically the Scrupulosity Website and much of the way i react to and interact with media has been colored by my years spent absorbing the viewpoints of said Scrupulosity Website! i even used to look up discourse topics on tumblr just to anger myself on purpose, which is a dangerous road to go down, to build up Enemies and Factions in your mind- this is how discourse culture works. the culture of tumblr teaches you to see the world in black and white, and to feel like youre always in danger of compromising your moral purity or being attacked by the morally impure. If You Don’t Reblog This You Are A Bad Person. even as someone who nowadays tries to stay away from discourse entirely, its still there in the back of my mind, because the way we interact on this website is colored by this. when im online i dont actually want to be angry all the time! in fact i like putting my effort towards more positive stuff. but additionally: tumblr made me unhappy but it also made me an addict

and yeah social media addiction sounds like a silly boomer thing to complain about but one thing i noticed when i started trying to curb my time spent on tumblr was that opening the site was damn near compulsive. we all know those “open tumblr, close tumblr, open tumblr again immediately after” memes but that did describe my behavior pretty accurately. the draw and allure of social media feeds is powerful, if i accidentally click the youtubes short tab ill find myself a half hour later scrolling through random shit i don't care about and asking well how the hell did i get here? i dont even like that stuff! tumblr is no different no matter how much the site tries to coast on the reputation of being the last social media that's a “remnant of the old web” and “has no algorithm”. i like my chronological dash but it is equally as addicting to scroll through the thousands of people ive followed over the years, as it is to scroll through the algorithmic feeds of youtube shorts, because that's just social media!

and kicking addiction is pretty damn hard. before 2023, i made two separate attempts at reducing my tumblr usage and both fell through within a week due to that addiction. for reference this current bought of thoughts about reducing my tumblr usage and making my online/irl balance more healthy, around the start of 2023 when i began working on my website and its taken me an entire year to wean myself off of the hellsite, bit by bit. theres a point where it stopped being a conscious act, and even as i was carefully whittling down how often i use tumblr with extensions like leechblock i still had that compulsion go off multiple times every day, its a really strange feeling. but now that ive found so many more ways to express myself online, i just feel more whole now... i guess what im saying is that when i post on tumblr my first instinct is to complain or wallow about something, when i post on my own handmade blog on my website i always want to talk about things that excite me or make me happy! and its been such a tangible change in the way i think and act and im certain its because of the way social media and tumblr have their own “societal expectations” and structure that is built to feed on this negativity loop.

and a lot of the biggest shifts happened when i began immersing myself in the ideals of the web revival, while creating my own website. finding things that genuinely interested me and niches i want to occupy made me so much happier. i know we make a lot of jokes about having mutuals we never talk to that mean the world to us and i do think that is indicative of something. like, when i post on a forum full of strangers i am engaging with more “face to face” (or the digital equivalent) communication than i do with years-long mutuals. how genuine are these connections, this dashboard, the enjoyment i got from that meme post ill forget in 10 minutes? (not to say that i don’t genuinely care abt my followers and mutuals. ykwim?) i can still get all the things i enjoy out of tumblr in a more curated form via rss feeds; ive been so much more proud of what i post and create and code on my website. what am i here for? i gradually realized that i am losing absolutely nothing when i “miss out” or block tumblr on my phone or what have you.

since starting working on my neocities site ive felt so much creative drive. ive created whole interactive essays and worlds and games and writings and so many things i could never host on social media. my website is a place of my very own, and ive been learning the value of focusing on what i put out into the net compared to what i take from it. its made me feel so much more fulfilled when i spend time online.

and let's not forget about staff. i have broader issues with how automattic in particular has gone about running the site. the ads only took up more and more of the dashboard, and every month it felt like there was some new paid feature doomed to never take off. all while the user experience gradually degraded. using the site without browser extensions to fix the ui and block the ads and tumblr live and all the other shit they threw all over the place makes it look like its ridden with viruses, and i think the fact that its become so normalized to feel like we have to stay in spaces that become increasingly hostile to us, even while the internet is so vast, is really strange (i mean, i also thought that way at first). but Anyway. so much time and effort was spent on features no one liked or wanted in some desperate attempt to get a little extra money, while staff members get in public fights with users who complain about getting monetization shoved down their throat. its so openly pathetic. the merch store had mostly mediocre designs and the digital tumblrmart is absolutely full of useless digital goods with free alternatives. considering this is a userbase that gladly donates to other sites donation drives for hosting costs (i.e. ao3, wikipedia, internet archive), i am shocked that staff never considered the obvious answer of a fucking donation drive once a year or so! the ceo telling people with concerns about the ads being unsafe for epilepsy to “just pay the ad free subscription” is one of the most disgusting things ive ever heard from someone officially representing such a platform. do not be fooled by the reputation tumblr has cultivated: all that it cares about is making money from you. tumblr is “in danger” because it can't turn a profit- because a profit is all they care about!

so why stay here when im happier elsewhere, apart from the addictive compulsion? that's what ive been thinking through for nearly a year, realizing that i have no reason to, and that weaning myself off of the addiction is in my best interest. i can create and blog and have fun online and connect with others and follow other peoples work all without the need for tumblr anymore! and i think id be all the healthier for it.

over the past year ive truly fallen in love with the internet again and ive loved putting myself out there, unrestrained in ways i havent felt since i was very young. but nonetheless ive learned a lot on tumblr, ive had some of the worst and best experiences of my online life, and i dont doubt that i would be a much different person if i had never been a tumblr user for as long as i was. but i had to break out of this shell eventually.

i keep going over this wondering how i can express every feeling in my head, how i can word everything just a little better, how i can make the perfect goodbye. but i think this will have to suffice.

you can still keep up with me online here:

-explore my website: i keep it consistently updated and im always adding new things and writing new posts on my blog! you can even speak to me directly on the site! if you sign my guestbook or use my chatbox ill try to respond :) if theres anything on this list you do id like it to be this one! i worked hard on it! you can even send me chat messages on my homepage! just keep in mind it may not display everything right on most mobile browsers, but it should be mostly navigable...

you can also subscribe to my rss feed. if you don't know what rss is, it allows you to use a feed reader to keep up with updates from sites all over the internet! my rss feed will notify you whenever ive made a new post on my blog or made an interesting edit on my site id like you to take a peek at :0 convenient, right?

you can also email me at wygolvillage@gmail.com to message me directly. if you prefer im also “wygolvillage” on discord

thank you and happy new years :) thanks for seeing me off as i sail to a new sunrise <3

[the-s1lly-corner]

TADC X READER REQUESTS + RULES!

a modified list of rules for requesting for TADC! for the most part its the same as the original post, but with some important modifications! The inbox part is especially important as I will likely close and reopen requests several times depending on how many are sent in! While I did have loads of fun doing all the requests last week it was very overwhelming and extremely taxing on my mental and physical health <\3

That said, yahoo, I'm back!! Not sure how active I'll be today (11/4), since I'll be spending a lot of the day drawing and prepping for tonights dinner. But !!!

How to request!

sending in a request is simple! you can go into my inbox and send in the character(s) you want! you can describe what kind of reader you want, as well as put in any scenario you want! If you are unsure on whether or not my requests are open, you can refer to my bio, which i keep up to date with of the request status! What all you can request will be detailed below!

What you can request/What I will write!

Please note that if you send in a request while they are closed it will not be answered**, so its best to hold on to your requests until theyre opened or to find another blog !!

**anything sent in while requests are closed will not be answered even after they were reopened; otherwise there wouldn't. Really be much of a point of the open/close system, yk?

you can request most anything so long as it is not listed in the will not write section! if anything slips by and makes me uncomfortable i will let you know!

romantic, platonic, and familial hcs are all welcome here!

the reader is GN by default, you can request a gender if you want, however due to the style of my writing it wont make much of a difference

you can request anyone from the entire TADC cast (save for bubble and Kaufmo), however i will note that occasionally some characters will be left out of full cast lists due to the admin not having any worthwhile ideas for a character. this is less of a "dont request certain characters/less characters" and more of a "hey this is headsup and this is a case by case thing but overall i do do the entire cast"

readers that are similar to existing characters! just a headsup that if i dont know the character i will rely on a character wiki or a friend who knows about the character! So theres a solid chance I may do a disservice to the character in question, heed this warning (/lh)

im also down for character x character! again if the ship makes me uncomfortable i will let you know so you dont have to wait on a request/can move on to a different blog to answer for you,,, should note I rarely do character x character so quality on these will be especially shotty

What you cant request/What I will not write!

no NSFW or kink related asks, please. this blog is SFW, anything that is NSFW or kink-adjacent will immediately be denied

no yandere. while i do write for jealous partners and readers, full yandere stuff is where i draw the line as i am not personally comfortable with the trope/the romance stuff surrounding it

general no no stuff (ab^se of any kind, active** SH, ect ect)

SH is allowed so long as its about healed wounds rather than the act itself being written

Other!

full fanfics and oneshots

I have the right to deny any request for any reason, be it discomfort or feeling underqualified to write about a certain topic. It is nothing against you, there are some requests I simply may not be able to complete. I urge that you respect that and to not push me to answer a request I have already denied

please do not spam or try to push me to answer your request sooner, i tend to answer requests in the order they have been sent; so while it may look like im answering a bunch of people and ignoring you, it is likely not the case! as well as this, sometimes tumblr eats stuff so sometimes it could also be that and i am unaware that you have requested something

my posts tend to be a short paragraph per character or a list of bullet point hcs, i am not at all confident in my skills of writing actual. fanfics, so uh uh .. yeah

[flowercrown-bard]

Thank you @restless-witch for tagging me ^^

Questions for 15 friends

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?: Not as far as I know (i like to believe I'm named after a character feom "Pippi Longstockings" but i know I'm not) If, for some reason, i don't want to tell someone my given name I tend to use names of characters I played in a ttrpg or in a play (my favourite name is Valentine from Twelth Night) if that counts?

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?: Monday, from 8pm until 10:30pm, with some breaks (i had a bit of an exhausting week with a lot of bottled up emotions and rehearsing for a play in which sickness, death and loneliness are prominent topics is both cathartic and very hard sometimes)

DO YOU HAVE KIDS?: Nope

WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?: i used to play handball (hated it), vaulting (loved it), track and field athletics (hated it), hip hop dancing (it was fun i guess but i also felt incredibly awkward), Judo (loved it), Jiu Jitsu (loved it). Now I dance (for the theatre but I'll still count it) and go running sometimes and very rarely I do some sword fighting with a friend (i feel like I'm missing something but i dont remember anything else)

DO YOU USE SARCASM?: Yeah, but only with certain people. I am very bad at telling if someone else is just being sarcastic or is genuinely insulting me, so i often worry that my sarcasm comes across as such. I often follow it up with "just a joke" or something

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?: Probably hairstyle and clothes? Visual things by which i can try to remember them

WHAT’S YOUR EYE COLOUR?: Brown

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?: Depends on my mood

ANY TALENTS?: One time I got out of bed and failed so hard that i broke a foot. Make of that what you will

WHERE WERE YOU BORN?: Germany

WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?:

Theater (including singing, dancing, acting, building the stage set, crafting the props)

cooking (i love doing it, i just don't do it very often)

playing the guitar

ttrpg

going on long walks/hiking -running -creative writing -indulging in the hubris of thinking i can teach myself a new skill without doing any research (aka. Whittling, embroidery, crocheting, making my own dnd dice) I feel like I'm missing something but oh well

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?: Sadly no. But I'll give an honourable mention to the dog I'm taking on walks whenever i got time

HOW TALL ARE YOU?: 168cm probably. I haven't measured my height in ages

FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL?: Theater and literature. Honourable mention to maths, not because i liked o4 understood the subject but because my teacher was the absolute best

DREAM JOB?: Kindergarten teacher (and maybe publishing a book one day)

Tagging: @dhwty-writes @parttime-creative @sinilumi @combatbootsfemme @lycanbucky @lokibus @a-kind-of-merry-war @witcher-and-his-bard and everyone else who sees this and wants to do this <3

[aloera]

Aloera hii came running when i got the notification, djdjd incredibly as always ❤ can i ask how much time did it took you to find that tone in ur writing? I mean they way you describe things and feeling without making them too "poetic"and corny like it often happens when one tries to write? Also i wanted to share with you the manga panels i searched after reading your fic just so idk gsjd the expressions and significance fjdjf (i love this face is so :() (second one their canon dynamic>>> fanon)

I know these last too have been brought so much times but idc this will always be iconic, the first high epic point in the manga, everything got set in motions after this(to me) wish with a follow up more substantial after this a hint of a conversation idk (a lot of people have move on from this but i will always remeber) sorry that this got so long i just wanted to share this with you excuse my english have a great week/end.

first off thank you so much!! youre so sweet :)

as to how much time it took ive been writing since i was like.. six. and im twenty now. so ig fourteen years skull emoji.. but in general i think i focus less now on trying to sound like... super smart? if that makes sense? sometimes i think what makes things sound kinda corny is when youre describing stuff that you dont actually know.. so i try to just focus on stuff that i do know!! like for example with similes and stuff i just draw from stuff that i see in my own life.. common things.. and the hope is that it comes across as familiar and people reading that go oh i know what that feels like. yk? instead of trying to like.. idk be the next shakespeare and be super poetic and delve into topics that are maybe beyond me or just not really suited to my style of writing. no shade to people who do that!! thats just what worked for me in terms of developing my style :) for dialogue as well i'll sometimes say it out loud to see if it sounds like smth a real person would say outloud bc sometimes... its not... and i rewrite it until im not like. cringing as i say it LMFOA but also mind u i think there will sometimes always be a certain level of corn bc we are writing fic. like it is inherently corny asf. but once you get over that you can have a lot more fun with it :D

KIRISHIMAS LITTLE FACE SHUT UPPP i love him. i love him so bad. he actually invented facial expressions its crazy. have u seen that one panel of him glaring at monoma i think about it everyday hes SO FUNNY

you r so so so write on canon>fanon w them. their canon interactions are just so lovely and so full of heart and so recriprocated like i just know they are the most annoying two people to be around but they dont even care bc they are having so much fun with each other!!! which is why i love them :)

also. yeah. you and me are very right where you left me coded re kamino. i will never be over it i fear. i will be like seventy years old talking about "it has to be you" "if i cant do this im not even a man" "come" "you idiot" LIKE THAT WAS CRAZYYYYYYY i feel like as much as i get annoyed ab horikoshi kind of forgetting ab krbk i will never fully be able to be mad at him bc he gave us that.... like That Moment seared itself into my personhood. kickstarted a hand fixation and an undying loyalty fixation and like. twenty other fixations. is what it is ig.

sorry this is so long omg i just had sm to say but in conclusion thank you so much for the ask!! i will always love talking ab krbk so i really appreciated getting to talk about them with you :)))

[trash-can-sam]

OKAY this is a long one but I dont see people talk about Grace and I deeply adore her shes my second favorite (almost tied with first (Qi) tbh) and deserves more love.

Heres the line that I pretty much based this on:

When I fist saw that line I was like oh thats interesting but then I learned about what she was and I was like OH MY GOD SHES TALKING ABOUT HERSELF. Because what are the chances she just happens to have a sister with a very similar job as her, and the wouldnt you get sick of a life like that implies she doesnt like her job even if she does actually have a sister.

(Also this line from her engagement letter)

NOW THINGS THAT I IMPLY THAT ARE NOT CERTAIN BUT ARE TRUE TO ME (you do not have to read this to understand anything I just want to talk about her):

She genuinely is interested in archeology. Her collecting various things for archeolgy could have just been her making herself seem more convincing, but she does genuinely seem very informed on the topic. AGAIN, could be her being more convincing, but I wouldnt doubt if she actually majored in it (or at least took a few classes) because it would make sense to play a character with something youre kind of knowlegable about, and she seems to know quite a bit about specific school practices and genuinely be opinionated on archeology's place in the world. Also, her likes indicate this is something shes genuinely interested in and passionate about. THE DIGGING HOLES IN THE GARDEN THING ALSO IS NOT MADE UP, and she says "Old habits die hard I guess", implying (at least to me) that she did it for similar reasons or maybe that she found something that inspired her to be interested in archeology.

She definetly seems to not really have faith in the system shes in, or at least doubt in it. Im not saying shes radical or anything (IF WE ARE GETTING SPECIFIC (Using current day terms) she seems reasonably moderate, pretty center left yk but I wouldnt be surprised if she believed in more socialist policies and shes clearly informed in whats going on, partially because of her job and also because I think being informed is important to her) and she still does work for the government, but she seems to not really be completely content with it. I dont really have any concrete proof for that besides this line which is really just how she thinks:

NOW she says she wasnt really involved in politics, which I think at the time shes saying this is true. I wouldnt be surprised if she was more involved when she was younger, but I think for the most part she has ideas. She really likes to think (also proved by this line, I think she thinks a lot of thoughts in a similar vein but for the most part doesnt share them because they dont really fit her brand) and I feel like that would translate more into thinking more of ideals than actual politics, especially since she feels like people who are noble and want to make a difference cannot under the current system.

I feel like there were more lines in quests and what not with her being more disillusioned but full disclosure this could entirely be an illlusion of the mind palace.

Since she also mentions specifically making a difference, I also decided to extrapolate that was strongly about her as well. Wanting to make a difference being attatched to her choosing the job is also something not said at all, but something I decided to connect because it makes sm sense to me

I THINK THATS ALL. But a lot of this is largely headcanon since we dont have that much info on her (Character development is still low, therefore I cry and sob and make things up completely BECAUSE ITS FUN.)

please think about her more so i dont have to make another 12 page kind of comic, mostly illustrated writing.

[inqilabi]

I’ve been following you for a while (since 2017ish) so interesting to see how your views and ideas about certain topics have evolved! It’s refreshing to see. In terms of dating/relationships, is there something in particular that made you become more open to relationships/dating after so long? did you actively made an effort to seek out romantic connections or do you think it’s something that was naturally bound to happen being that we live in a society where romantic relationships are more valued so becomes a natural trajectory..?

thank you so much, i appreciate it 💖💖

i think what made me open to it is realizing that 1) life is going to more difficult alone. This world is not built for single people. And while, i have been isolated and "alone" for many years - because many of my friends got married long ago and i didnt date for like almost a decade. So I was use to this. But the other aspect is that i realized 2) the acceptance and comfort i had with being alone was likely a trauma response. I didnt have the best upbringing. And i think being comfortable with being alone was a cope. A good one because i mean, it does protect you. especially from men - if you are okay leaving men behind because you know youre going to be fine, it's very protective.

Me not wanting to seek out relationships for a decade is something i dont fully understand. I dont understand now what i spent my time on. Why i didnt build this aspect of my life. I did write about it a bit here where i say that i intellecualized a lot of my feelings. And honestly when it comes to relationships with men, all of that intellecualization is spot on. That's what made it hard to discern from whether this is actually a legit response or a trauma coping mechanism. I was just so apathetic.

I do think that in a healthy happy upbringing and society, we are social communal beings. You do want a companion. Could be romantic or platonic. Someone to share things with. It could be friends as well. I socially isolated where i didnt try to make new friends either. You want to build basically as i said in this post. If you are well adjusted, you want positive outcomes. Not negative or apathy or indifference. It doesn't have to be romance, it can be friendships and community. you just want more for yourself and the world. And that was not a state i was in until recently. When i did get into that state, i started muay thai, i made a group of local women to meet up with and do activities and i also started dating. all of these things happened simultaneously.