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chelsorz07 · 7 years ago

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21 year old me was a little bitch

So is 28 year old me. Got another one for y’all. 2010/2017.

Are you cheating on someone right now? no. never have, never will. Still haven’t, still wouldn’t.

Day been rough? nope. it's been a good weekend. i'm just tired. Yeah actually, I spent most of it in bed sick.

Where was the last place you fell asleep other than your bed? the bed in my hotel room. The cats’ bed. Yes, they have their own full size bed. And yes, I sleep there with them sometimes.

Would you kill a hobo for 100,000,000 dollars? if i could avoid the repercussions of homicide, sure. I would kill anyone for a hundred million dollars.

What makes you laugh no matter what? "wang whiplash" lol Memes.

Have you done bad things with your parents near by? sure. Yeah but in hindsight not that bad. Just like, smoking cigarettes on the roof.

Do you think your future will be a good one? we'll see. Some days I have hope, some days I’m not sure I’ll see tomorrow.

If you could pack up and leave your life now to move away, would you? no. things may be starting to look up. Not leave but if I could bring my life back home to PA with me that’d be optimal.

Will your next kiss be a mistake? hopefully not. No.

What were you doing 12 AM last night? hanging in the hotel with my mom. watching a halloween special on HGTV. Watching TWD.

What does your ex mean to you? everything. He’s still my best friend, even after all the shit we’ve been through.

Honestly, who are you texting? no one. i'm gonna go to sleep after i'm done here. Everybody’s sleeping.

How late did you stay up last night and why? 2ish. that's early for me. i had a couple glasses of wine and actually slept more than an hour for once. 9am.

What if your boyfriend or girlfriend went through your phone? i don't have a boyfriend. Husband now. And I don’t care. Although I doubt he’d feel the same if the situation were reversed.

Are you angry with someone right now? no one in particular. Not really I just still feel crappy.

Do you have sex everyday? i wish. Funny. I’ve had sex four times all year. Once in January, once in February, and twice two weeks ago.

Do you do drugs everyday? nope. No days. Unless a steady stream of Aleve, ibuprofen, heartburn medicine, and Sudafed counts.

Have you hugged anyone in the last 72 hours? probably maranda. I have not.

Is it awkward when you run into your ex? no. we still hang out. We try to hang out every time I’m home. If not, I’ll at least visit him at work.

Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with? sometimes. Fuck no she’s my ride or die.

If you are up after 3 am, what are you most likely doing? trying to sleep. this happens every night. Sudoku, Netflix, and Youtube.

Does anyone call you baby? yeah but i wish he wouldn't. i'm not his girlfriend. and i'm sure as hell not his baby. Um no. We’re not a “pet name” couple. I call him Dick and he calls me “hey”.

Your latest ex calls you and asks you back out, you say? i thought you'd never ask. Sorry, taken.

Do you think you'll be single for the rest of the year? probably. I haven’t been single in a very long time.

Be honest, do you have feelings towards anyone? yep. You betcha.

Is there a girl you can tell anything to? michele and erica. Amanda. And more recently, Faith.

Has anyone ever drunk/high called/texted you? sure. it goes both ways. Many times.

Is there a guy that knows everything about you? yes. Two or three. Dave, Mike, my dad. Maybe Mark (my brother-in-law).

Have you ever liked someone just because they were good looking? well yeah. who hasn't? but if there's nothing deeper, it doesn't work out. I can appreciate some human beauty.

Do you think you can last in a relationship for over 6 months? i have. Over 8 years. Despite the fact that we weren’t technically together the first time I took this quiz, we decided that those 18 months didn’t count because we still spent every day together anyway and knew we’d end up here.

Have you ever lost someone you wish you didn't? understatement. Yeah but I got them back.

You love someone? indeed. I love a lot of someones.

You've had sex with over 12 people, haven't you? nope. two. and one of them, i shouldn't have. That number is the same. But the second one - a subpar one night stand in a Dodge Ram? Bleh. We don’t think about it.

Was 2009 a good year? best year of my life. It was quite good.

Do you think 2010 will top 2009? worst year of my life. 2010 sucked. 2017 has been a roller coaster.

Will you be dating someone in six months? i don't have a crystal ball. Married.

Who is the last person you physically hit? my mom, but jokingly. I don’t hit people.

Do you plan on getting married someday? i would if it were to the right person. I am.

Which is harder: walking away from somebody you love or coming back to someone who hurt you? walking away. hands down. Walking away. Never could.

Did you sleep alone last night? well my mom was in the room too. Yeah Dave won’t be home for a couple more days.

Do you believe teenagers can be in love and stay in love? in VERY rare cases. I mean I was 19 when I fell in love and still am.

Honestly, have you ever eaten raw cookie dough? of course. Yeah but I don’t anymore. Not really that into cookies.

Did you wake up in the middle of the night last night? several times. I didn’t even go to sleep until late morning. And yes, I woke up a lot. I do that.

Would you be able to date someone who doesn't make you laugh? not a chance. Hell no. I need the lulz to survive.

What's the biggest annoyance in your life right now? having to be patient even though i know things will work out eventually. My physical ailments and my location. And the fact that my tv is a piece of shit so I have to keep turning it off and on just to get sound.

Are you a patient person? no. but i have to be. obviously. Not even a little.

If you could go back in time and change something, would you? i don't think it would have made a difference, to be honest. I wouldn’t have let things get so bad with my family. And Dave and I would’ve gotten married at the courthouse instead of having a big wedding because it was a disaster.

What are you looking forward to in the next 7 days? friday. Dave coming back, getting Primanti’s, and going home this weekend.

Is it easy for you to talk to people of the opposite sex? yeah, now it is. It’s not really easy for me to talk to any people, unless they’re an important part of my life.

Did the last person you kissed name start with a B? no. Negative.

Do you stay up later than ten o'clock on a week night? i haven't been to sleep that early in like ten years. I don’t go to bed at night anymore. Like ever.

Are you taller than 5 foot 7 inches? no. I’m 5′6″.

Are you one of those people who just don't care? ohhh...i try to claim that i don't. but it's not true. Hahaha alright that’s still the case.

When was the last time you laughed hard and why? wang whiplash. Memes.

Are you generally a happy person? not lately. No I’m a miserable cunt.

Whats on your shirt? hey monday. The Horde crest from WoW.

Where will you be in an hour? here. sleeping. Probably right in this very chair.

Who was the first person you talked to today? mom. I haven’t talked to anyone today.

How do you feel right now? tired. In pain.

Had sex at school? nope. I didn’t even have sex for the first time until long after I graduated.

Who was the last girl you talked to? mom. Amanda.

When’s the last time you talked to your sister? like 20 minutes. Allie, probably a couple weeks ago. Mandi, couldn’t tell ya. Even when we’re in the same room we don’t speak.

Do you regret something you did today? no. I regret doing nothing today. But I couldn’t really move.

Do you miss someone? yes. I miss everyone. Dave when he’s gone, my family, my friends, my home. I just want to go back.

Will this Sunday be a good one? if i can take a nap, yeah. I’ll be in Bradford so yes.

Are you keeping a big secret right now? i don't have any secrets. Still an open book.

The past 72 hours have you been under the influence? yes. Nope. Don’t drink anymore.

What was the last thing you drank? dew. Water.

Have you ever had a panic attack? many. More than I can count. But I haven’t had one in a while.

Have your parents ever smoked pot? my dad did once. my mom never did. Same.

Want someone back in your life? like you would not believe. The people I want in my life are in it, they’re just too far away.

What's your favorite color? green. Green, black, grey, plaid.

Do you listen to music every day? i have to. it keeps me sane. Usually but I haven’t today. Didn’t have the energy to play anything.

Have you been a happy, angry, or sad person lately? sad, mostly. angry if i think too hard. happy? well, we'll see. All of the above, and then some.

Are you an emotional person? very. Yessir.

Has anybody ever given you butterflies? he still does. every day. i don't even have to see him. Yes.

Do you ever think about stuff and start crying? yeahh.. Often.

When is the next time you will see the person you last kissed? probably never. i'm fine with that. Possibly Wednesday night, definitely sometime Thursday.

Have any memories that you'd like to forget? no. Oh yeah.

#not spn #personal #about me #bring back myspace surveys 2k17 #i do what i want

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canaryatlaw · 7 years ago

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mmmm. tired because I’ve been up forever. but that’s good, because it means I woke up and didn’t blow off my responsibilities today! woot woot! that’s a win in my book. My alarm was set for 7, but my phone has been doing this weird thing where the alarm doesn’t go off for several minutes after when I set it for, and normally it’s a few minutes but today it was like 15 minutes, so I had to scramble to get out the door and make it to PT by 7:30. PT was fine, early, but fine, then I came back and tried to rest for like twenty minutes before walking to the train and going to therapy. I have this terrible habit of dreading therapy in my head leading up to it, but then it’s never actually bad and is generally good, but then the next time I still don’t want to go just as much lol. But today’s session was good, talked about school and family and breaking down how my whole stress about the job situation is really because I don't want to end up in a job where I’m unhappy, but I can’t know that until I start the job, so I may get a job I think I want and end up being miserable. good times! lol. from there I went to the other train line (and effortlessly flipped off the car that honked at me while I had the right of way crossing the street) and went to the DV courthouse. It was a pretty slow day, so I didn't actually get a case again, which was frustrating, but whatever. I took someone from the morning shift to court, and she legit already had her papers processed by the clerk’s office so I had to give her my abbreviated court talk on the way up to the third floor. We had a really good judge though, I can’t remember ever seeing him before but he’s this older guy and he was super to the point and no nonsense, and we walked out of there with the order in no time (if only they could all go like that). Went back downstairs and waited for a little while to see if a case would come in, trying to do some of my adoption law reading in the process, but after a while we closed up for the day. so since I’m supposed to get a certain amount of time in for the practicum, if the clinic closes early I’m supposed to go observe court, so that’s what I did. we got bounced around a bit trying to find a judge that was still up, but ended up in a courtroom and had to watch two unfortunate cases where the person legally did not at all qualify for the emergency order under the statute and the judge of course had to tell them that but you could tell they just didn’t get it and they were gonna walk away with the view that the system just doesn’t care about them, and like, that is such a frustrating feeling. We ended up talking to the judge for a bit afterwards, she was super chill and even expressed her frustration at cases like that where the cops or someone else will send someone to the courthouse to get an order when they don’t qualify at all, and then she has to be the bad guy and tell them no because she has to follow the law. Hung out some more and ended up getting two criminal OPs quickly, so the ASA questioned them and it’s a super smooth process. It was a little past 4 then which is when I’m supposed to stay till, so I headed out then and went to school. I ended up meeting my spring break friend (it’s been a year and a half since that spring break, but I like to use my nicknames for friends on here instead of actual names) at a bar a little down the block from school and got some food there before class, since I’m hardcore running out of food lol my fridge is practically empty and I ate the last of my frozen meal stockpile tonight so I had to outsource dinner. It was good getting to catch up with her. Went to adoption class, where OF FUCKING COURSE WE HAVE A QUIZ THE ONE WEEK I DIDN’T DO THE READING, thankfully it was open book at least so I could figure out some semblance of an answer to the questions rather than just completely fudging it which would’ve been a disaster. I had a minor chest pain incident a little after 7, it wasn’t very intense for a few minutes and then was intense for like 2 minutes, which is a lot shorter than normal, so that was good at least. It has me thinking it’s food related though, because I technically had fried stuff at the bar and that could’ve set it off, so I’ll have to watch that more closely. We got out at 8, I went home and found my roommate laid out on the couch watching a show. she fell down two stairs at her friend’s apartment the other day and sprained her ankle real badly, so she’s trying to take it easy. so I watched the show with her for a bit, then finished last night’s episode of the flash, and before I can even give you a reaction to the actual episode I have to tell you HOW FUCKING MAD I AM that they included that conversation where Barry was like “oh, maybe it was alright for him to plant evidence if he was just trying to help people, maybe I did the wrong thing by exposing his corruption” because ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?????? I was so fucking pissed off. That kind of behavior, when the cop thinks “it doesn’t matter, because he’s guilty anyway” is exactly what leads to so many people being wrongfully convicted, and to even entertain the idea that corruption and framing people is okay if you’re just trying to help people is so morally appalling I was honestly shocked they actually had him say it. I get that most people don’t have such strong feelings on this issue as I do, but this isn’t shit to play with. Anyway. The rest of the episode was alright I guess. Ralph was fairly likable for someone we’re clearly not supposed to like, the plot was kind of thin, but I guess it’s good that he’ll be helping their team out now. The whole Breecher hunting Cisco plot was, I’m sorry, but FUCKING AWFUL, like why on earth would I want to watch that?? no, just no. so much wrong. sigh. anyway, I stayed up for a little while longer, then started getting ready for bed, and more or less here we are. Damn I’m tired, so I’m gonna go to sleep now. At least I can sleep in till like 10:15 tomorrow. Goodnight babes. Stay awesome.

#daily journal #November 2017

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