#my problems almost feel like dumb so i don't wanna tell anyone personally one on one no matter wut

[kaleidakoolest]

Uuuuugh

[jaidens]

Maverick Mitchell angst fic where breakdowns in front of the reader after Goose's death

And Feel You Forget Me Like I Used To Feel You Breathe

pairing [s] : pete mitchell x reader

warning [s] : mentions of : death, crying, regret, blame |

a/n [s] : ty for the request! [requests are open]

After Goose’s death, Pete became distant and gone. Drinking away his feelings and long motorcycle rides to flee away from his problems, and people that brought up his problems. He only called Carole five times since that day; deciding that in her head, he was the worst person to ever touch the ground of the Earth.

One day he comes home smelling like cheap booze. He shrugs his bomber jacket off of him and sets it on the hooks that are on the wall. You're sleeping on the small couch with a thin blanket over you. The television is on and it's playing some dumb movie from the 70s. You pop up whenever Pete accidentally drops one of his boots too quickly on the floor.

“Pete! Oh, I was worried sick. Where have you been? Oh you smell like alcohol.” You stand up and walk over to Pete and smooth out his t-shirt. He doesn't hold eye contact with you. He looks at the ground like a kid who just got in time out.

“I was nowhere. Get off me.” The anger spits from his mouth and he pushes against you. You immediately turn to look at his back side. “What? I’m an adult. I can do whatever I goddamn please!” You can't even tell why he's so angry. You haven't crowded him or anything, he's just getting angry at his own head. You attempt to walk closer to him and he's huffing and puffing while throwing together a sandwich on the island counter.

You're dressed in his t-shirt and a pair of underwear. Usually, he would get real close to hug you whenever he gets home. Now, he's cold to you and only speaks to you whenever he's forced too. “Pete what is happening to you? Honey, you have to talk.” Your hand goes to his forearm and sits there comfortingly.

“I don't wanna talk. That's all everyone tells me. ‘You have to talk Pete!’ What if I don't want too? Has anyone ever thought of that?!” His voice echoes through the house and you see his lip quivers whenever he finishes. His eyes start to tear and you see his face start to flush. He covers his face with his hand and shakes it.

All you do is stare at him and choose to not speak. He's vulnerable right now and you worry you might hurt him. Quiet sobs start and he moves his body to lay in your arms. You attempt to drag him away from the kitchen to the living room, to let him sit down against the couch.

He sits down on the creme-colored couch and he sets his elbows on his knees. Your hand goes to his back and he almost begins to shake. You've only seen Pete like this a few times, vulnerable and scared. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I'm sorry. I’m Sor—” Pete says quickly before you stop him.

“Pete no, you don't have to apologize for anything. You're grieving. This is normal.”

Pete looks at you with blood-shot eyes, cheeks a burning red, and puffy eyes. The feelings he's been having finally started to cut through his strong walls he had put up. He wipes away the tears that fall from his eyes. “It's so hard. To go to work and know everyone looks at me. And it's my fault that Bradley doesn't have a Dad, Carole doesn't have a husband, and I lost my best friend.”

You sit there and let him talk. Pete curls in on himself to hide himself. “It wasn't your fault. I understand it's hard to not think that. The situation was the plane, not the pilot. Those are your words, not mine. Carole doesn't blame you, honey. You shouldn't blame yourself. Bradley has so much love.” Pete continues to sniffle as he attempts to breathe and relax from his crying fit.

“I know. And, I'm sorry for just not talking to you. I couldn't look you in the face knowing what I did.” Pete admits and you smile at him. He gently scoots over to you and lays against your shoulder. You kiss the temple of his head and put your hand on the side of his head. With a gentle pull, you lay against the arm of the couch and open your legs. Pete slides in-between them and lays his head on your chest.

“It’s alright. You're fine, I'm fine, we'll be alright.” You end the conversation with a hum and gentle rub of his back. Pete was still mourning; and with an understanding of his feelings you would be able to help. Either way, you knew it would eventually be fine.

[deadbydangit]

@vicketch I'm sorry you aren't feeling well, maybe this will help.

Cheering up a depressed Reader

Legion (Julie), Dwight, Kate

Legion (Julie)

Feeling down?

Not for long!

This girl has been there, done that.

When she first entered the realm, she had a period of depression.

But she pulled herself out of it.

And she's going to pull you out of that pit too.

First, she'll want to talk about it.

What's bothering you?

Is someone bothering you?

"If it is I'll go kick their ass right now."

She won't outright force you to talk, but she'll strongly encourage it.

Want some snacks?

She has lots of snacks.

Cookies were always her go to snack when she was upset.

Just no beer.

Or drugs

Julie knows better than anyone how drinking doesn't help solve the problem.

She and the other Legion have tried to drink and smoke their troubles away.

It does not work.

It makes things worse.

Wanna play a game?

Maybe do a make over?

Prank Frank?

Go for a walk?

Tell stories?

You sure you don't want to prank Frank.

"Trust me. It's really funny. I once replaced his knife with a rubber one and he came back from trials pissed."

And laughing is a good way to feel better.

Sitting around just makes things worse.

She's the type who wants to keep you focused on anything but your depression.

She'll even swallow her pride and tell you about her own experience with it and how she dealt with it.

"I was with the others, we all worked through it together. And you? I'll work through it with you. You won't suffer alone."

Dwight Fairfield

You don't even have to say anything, Dwight can tell.

He's great at reading emotions and detecting small changes in someone's personality.

So, when you don't seem like yourself, he knows.

He's been through depression before.

He knows how much it sucks.

But he won't outright say he knows you're depressed.

He'll lay beside you one day, and just start chatting with you.

"I've been where you are. I felt so useless, I thought everything was just pointless."

He'll pull your head into his lap.

"But then I realized, there are so many more reasons to be happy than there are to be sad. Even here."

And he'll list some.

"Sunshine, flowers, you..."

And he'll look down at you with tears in his eyes.

But he's still smiling.

He hates seeing you so upset.

But him frowning isn't going to make you feel better.

He's no therapist, but he'll listen and give the best advice he can.

Sometimes he'll do something silly or tell a really dumb joke.

But you're laughing and smiling.

He's also very good about keeping track of your health.

Did you drink enough water? Have you eaten? Was it healthy? Too much junk food can make you depressed.

It may seem overbearing, but he really wants you to get better.

You being so sad isn't on his list of things that make him happy.

Kate Denson

"What's got you all blue sugar?"

She'll make sure to ask in private.

She understands if you don't want your troubles going public.

She had enough of that in the real world.

Kate is also very good at sensing emotions.

This girl is almost always rainbows and sunshine.

So it's surprising that even she dealt with depression at a time

"I wasn't doing what I loved to make me happy. So my music wasn't happy. Then no one is happy."

If you want to talk about it, she's all ears.

If not, she's not going to force you.

Instead, she'll change the subject.

Something funny like a story or a joke.

"...And that's how I accidentally made Hannah Montana hate my guts."

And she'll laugh.

And her laughter will make you laugh.

She had written some music when she was in her depressive moments, and she'll offer to sing it to you.

Then she'll sing you her most upbeat happy ones.

It's to show you how strong she bounced back from her sadness.

"Come 'er Darlin'."

She's putting your fingers on her guitar and guiding you to a few strings.

It's her way of saying that you can get over it too.

"And I'll be right 'er with ya' the whole time."

[stevie-petey]

SPEAKING OF SEASON FOUR

I'm so worried that the duffer brothers are gonna fuck up jancy. That flirting with Steve and Nancy in season four was not cute. Like jancy isn't my favorite ship in the series (because I'm in love with Jonathan but that's not the point) but we've established that Nancy DOESN'T love Steve. Did you see Jonathan's face when Nancy started talking about how Steve's grown up? You could tell it made him insecure, It's foreshadowing the love triangle all over again and there's no point in keeping it. It doesn't add to the story it's just another stupid plot for drama, which we don't really need!

It also takes away from Nancy's character!! She's not the kind of girl to just go from guy to guy. She's also not the kind of girl to flirt with her ex who's clearly still got feelings for her while she has a boyfriend!! Even if it was unintentional, like subconsciously, still she's smarter than that and she cares about Jonathan and Steve's feelings she wouldn't risk hurting the both of them at once.

I mean if we're talking about come home it could work as something for bug and Steve to work through I guess ( I don't wanna talk about it too much because it's so far away and there's a lot more we have to go through to get to that point) but it's so outside of Nancy's character. Maybe she's just confused cause she almost died and saw Steve get seriously hurt? But still Nancy isn't a homewrecker and she's not a super jealous or promiscuous person. Even if she didn't know about how close bug and Steve have grown she wouldn't go after him. But strictly speaking of stranger things now. She hardly interacted with Steve in season four, which is fair she's still in highschool and Steve has a job. They have their own shit going on. It's understandable. I feel like Nancy's character gets misconstrued a lot, partially because she keeps getting reduced to a love interest. I just hope Nancy and Jonathan don't fall apart because of how much they've changed during their time away. I love Steve but he's not right for Nancy and she's not right for Steve. I hope they Don't ruin such a great relationship with so much potential. Like I see the problems in jancy but I can see how well it could work if given the chance.

honestly it just feels like the writers dont KNOW what to do with nancy anymore or even jancy. i adore them and think theyre so sweet together but the writers are just ,,,, pissing me off. bringing back steves feelings for her and nancys weird feelings for him was just ??? unnecessary and NO ONE was asking for it

i will say however i do see the vision for stancy. i think they did have a good shot at being in love and happy, theyre right person wrong time, but if that was the plan since season 1 then ,,,, it shouldve been touched on earlier ?!?!!? we dont see nancys feelings for steve at ALL until season 4 like even WHILE THEY WERE DATING. its stupid. and like u said: nancy isnt like that !! she’d never directly hurt anyone :( shes so kind and loyal and the writers are mean

and jancy ,,, ugh they have sm potential if the writers would just figure them out. they keep having the same argument of jon wanting to care for his family and nancy wanting to uncover and explore shit its just. ugh.

for season 4 i will DEF be retconning some shit because yeah. im not dealing with a repeat love square that will be resolved literally THIS SEASON in season 2. feels so dumb to be so repetitive. i will however bring in some elements in that love triangle back in 4 but not in any definitive or dramatic way. smh

[glassanimalcollective]

I think your problem is that you don't understand that Seol isn't supposed to be a 1 to 1 representation of neither real life Japan nor Korea. I would actually say that if anything I think it's more inspired by China and Japan rather than Korea. Like the racists in game even call it the "Shao empire". But it clearly isnt trying to be real China or Japan

Is just a fictional culture

And I don't think the argument of "Taking inspiration of two different cultures to make a fictional one is bad" has a lot of merit when you fail to criticize the fact that Revachol in itself is clearly taking inspiration from both France and a post sovietic Republic, I've even seen people saying that Revachol reminded them of Manhattan. Very different cultures, but Revachol isn't either of them

And I wouldn't say whether they did good or not in how they handled the inspiration because truly, there's almost no content about Seol in the game as it doesn't aim to focus on that, but rather in Revachol's history. So how can I judge something that isn't there?

And BTW, hiring a consult for what is like 20 lines in a game with a million words isn't very viable either

By what I see on your posts, my guess is that you didn't play a lot because you didn't like it. Which is fine, but how do you expect anyone to take your criticisms seriously if you don't know what you are critiquing. Is like me saying that homestuck is bad, transphobic and problematic™️ because of something I've read, even though I've never even watched Homestuck, just seen some accounts of it.

Also, his name is Kitsuragi because is a reference to an Evangelion character, Masato Katsuragi

me with my eyes closed about the actual problem being pointed out. you can continue to enjoy your game but you wanna hear something real upsetting? this long ass message to me, trying to explain my own feelings about a badly written character is actually a pretty insensitive and (gasps) racist thing to do. Why don't you listen to other people's experiences? I played the game for a little bit and it made me so uncomfortable i haven't touched it again.

Talking to a consultant for the entire second character in your game actually makes a lot of sense. If you truly care about making something good and consumable by all people (ESPECIALLY THE PEOPLE YOU'RE TRYING TO REPRESENT?) you'll do that very basic work.

Maybe you should stay on your disco elysium blog and continue reblogging pics of your alcoholic meowmeow because you are not qualified to tell me about my own feelings here. This amount of grasping to tell me I'm not looking right at this game that could'nt even do research into the people it included in the story. They were *clearly* trying to write an asian experience but couldn't even be bothered to make sure their mashing of random cultures together wouldn't be upsetting to any of the asian people playing their game. It screams "didn't talk to one, not a single asian person during this game's creation."

Telling me the character is named after a random anime character is crazy too. that's still a japanese name when we claim the character isn't japanese, he's apparently part of a fake, poorly thought out franken-culture that can be basically described as "ambiguously asian." are you dumb?

[themysticsword]

Quitting RoR2 Modding

(posting this in case anyone who plays my RoR2 mods isn't in any of the discord servers lol)

So, basically, yeah, I'm done with Risk of Rain 2 for good. Don't wanna associate myself with the game. Just really want it gone from my life. I don't want to think about it.

All of the mods I made out of my personal interest are now marked as deprecated, and potentially will even be deleted later. The only things that will stay are projects that were either made for friends, had contributions from more than just me, or are funny enough that I feel like they should stay.

Why? For a lot of reasons.

The Community Manager

So, SeventeenUncles (or Suncles, as we all call him). The guy may seem like a chill person on the twitch streams, but god. He's Bad at server moderation. Everybody in the server knows it. And if somebody has any kind of complaint about that moderation, he silences all the critique and tells to open a ticket via Modmail, which will not result in anything because why would he care lmao he's the community manager and he makes all the rules.

Like this one. I wrote a proper, consise ticket about my mute (which was unfair, by the way!), expecting to either get unmuted or at least get a response or have a conversation as to why they think it was fair. Guess what I got.

you're welcome suncles.

There's a lot of problems with how he's running the server, which I'm not gonna talk about, because, luckily, someone else has already done it, in detail! https://www.tumblr.com/gabrielultrakill-bigboobs/723312859455651840/the-official-risk-of-rain-discord-and-its-hellish?source=share

A lot of nasty stuff. In the official server, mind you.

But yeah. He represents the company Hopoo Games, and who am I to support a company with a prick as their representative :)

The Community Itself

Now, I know this is a dumb reason to quit over, but it's not the reason. It's just one of them.

It's toxic. Elitist. And, most importantly, way too controllable. We have, like, 4-5 mainstream content creators, and almost all of them manage to give the worst tips to newbies despite sinking hours into the game and, supposedly, having a lot of experience and knowledge.

It's so bad to the point where some youtubers call out the wiki for giving "false information", so their fans go on the wiki and make edits while parroting whatever Mr. Youtuber said.

Picture this: you're a new player, and you have unlocked a hard character. You struggle with them, so you go to the wiki, and the first thing you're told is that you actually need to unlock a different ability for them to make them playable. And only 7-8 paragraphs below, the wiki tells you how to use the base abilities properly. You know. The ones that you have right now, as a new player. While also making them sound weaker than they are in reality. Doesn't this sound like imposing someone specific's preferred playstyle onto everybody else?

Constant arguments. You open the discord server, or the subreddit, or a youtube video, just about anything, and you'll see people disrespecting each other over a video game. These arguments usually stem from someone being incorrect, them getting corrected by others, and that person fighting until the end of times just to prove that they're actually right, because, for some reason, they can't accept being wrong.

And I kept seeing these arguments. Engaging in them. When you want to interact with the community of a game on this scale of popularity, you just can't not encounter the bad parts. Statistically impossible.

Oh, and you know why the community partially is like that? Because the devs and the moderators are fine with that behaviour. The devs are known to be all mean and like "massive trolls" or whatever. Meanwhile, you don't see this shit happening in the A Hat in Time or Celeste servers.

Other Projects

Lastly, I've been meaning to quit RoR2 for a long time now. I want to move on and do something else. I've been making RoR2 mods for 4 years now, I think? It's a shame I have to leave like this, but eh, whatever.

If you're reading this, I hope you're doing well! I'm doing well, because I got rid of the part of my life that's been bothering me for way too long :3 See ya in other games that I'll mod!

[cacw]

fatws rewatch thoughts

bucky breaking zemo out of prison was unbelievably dumb. bucky had no real reason to break him out it could have been ANYONE but bucky and it would have worked better. i don't even dislike him being there really it just doesn't make any sense whichever way you look at it. zemo didn't contribute anything worthwhile to the story at all unless you wanna believe that sam and bucky are complete idiots and couldn't manage this themselves. i mean i wouldn't blame you considering that's what the writers themselves seem to think

bucky tells his therapist she's bad at her job (true) but then when sam tells him the exact same shit he eats it up (get better friends bruh). sam down at the VA would not be saying any of this bs man. i can't even believe this was written in. bucky did not have to go and give everyone closure. that is the absolute last thing he should be thinking about. what good does that bring? does that improve any one of these peoples' lives? why is THAT the thing that's supposed to make him feel better? what the hell is wrong with all of you

sam and bucky are both done so unbelievably dirty. how do you fuck up so bad with only 6 episodes

no one is nice to each other and almost every line and character interaction feels so mean spirited. it should have been focused on sam and bucky's relationship and trauma and learning to grow and move past it and be there for each other and Be Kind but it seems like the writers were just trying to wrap up sam and bucky's storyline together as fast as possible

sam obviously does not like bucky. which is fine. but he doesn't trust him and that's the issue i have with it... you've known this guy for years you're not close but he was close with your best friend. he was your best friend's best friend. you put your life on the line to help save this guy. you have fought the same battles. you should KNOW he's trustworthy by now. has this spellman guy ever watched a cap movie because my bet is on no

bucky is never given a chance to breathe. why is bucky not allowed to be upset over what happened to him? why is the only thing in his mind the things he did as the winter soldier? of course of course it's gonna be so hard and it's gonna tear him up inside and that will never go away, but what about the rest. what about the years of brainwashing and torture and constant endless abuse. it's like he's not allowed to really feel

bucky is the show's punching bag for all 6 episodes. he's belittled and made fun of for the winter soldier shit all the time even though timeline wise it's been 9 YEARS since he was active. but it's all anyone knows him as for some reason. why is sam joking about this in front of his family. why is everyone treating him like a wild dog. why is this supposed to be funny

that isn't even mentioning how ooc bucky himself is. freeing zemo/damaging his relationship with the wakandans/rushing into fights/etcetcetc. it never ends. he's powered down both physically and mentally and once again it's a case of Bad Characterization Outside of Cap Trilogy

sam is such a good person. he's incredible. and he could be so much more if the writers had ever given a damn about giving him any real substance at all. does that make sense... it's the same problem they've always had with bucky. they don't know what to do with these characters they're too afraid to commit to anything and they end up neglecting to make their characters Actual Characters

i don't really think i hate john walker as a character as much as i dislike the way he's written (which is a problem i have with every character in this show). he is a product of his environment. it can be interesting. but it's not interesting enough to warrant making bucky look like the resident dumbass in order to make john look more sympathetic in turn

episode 5 (the boat episode) is the only one that's worth anything at all and even then it doesn't get the relationship between sam and bucky right. it's as close as they got but it wasn't enough

everything about this show is so shallow. it's so contrived it feels so pointless in the end because it doesn't REALLY feel like we saw anyone grow. the more i think about this the more i think it should have JUST been about sam. this is supposed to be about him growing into his title but it doesn't feel like anyone actually gained anything from this experience at all

the power broker stuff was dumb

i don't even know where to start with karli

you need to do better feige

[oddvanilla]

Some vent idk skip this

Yeah so this vent isn't really about me cause I barely have any problems to be struggling with but uhh I guess I have a small issue in my life

So if I didn't mention this before, I sit at the very back of the class between my two friends, In front of me is my other friend and in front of that is one of my classmates that i barely talk to💔 I'm really extroverted and I'm the student council president of my class so im pretty much in good terms with everyone in my class (or else they would vote for me lol) and the ex president was this really popular girl and stuff, and i dont dislike her but i just dont see myself having a casual conversation with her because she thinks I'm loud and stuff but whatever. Then my classmate who's Infront of my friend is for some reason always staring at me and my friends whenever we're joking around and acting dumb, and my friends got REALLY bothered by it but i dont think its annoying, i just think its interesting and i got curious and why that classmate is always staring at me. I had eye contact with them a couple of times but it never went past that. The ex president girl picked a fight the other day with them and I felt really bad because they're always quiet and almost never talked to anyone before. I learned that my classmate has 2 younger twin sisters in the same class as my sister, and my sister was telling me yesterday that she made a "your dad" joke in front of them and they told her that their dad is dead, sadly. When my sister told me that last night I felt really horrible and guilty, even though I didnt do anything wrong. Maybe that's the reason why my poor classmate is so reserved and doesn't have any friends, I never saw them sit with anybody during lunch and they're always left out whenever people are picking their groups for projects and stuff. I let that classmate in my project group because I felt sorry that they were a leftover and nobody wanted them in their group. I don't want them to feel alone anymore, I wanna be their friend. But then my whole class will hate me because everyone hates them and hates anybody who's friends with them. I wanna be someone they'll remember and feel safe to always hug me when they're upset. But I don't know how my friends will take it. My friends are pretty much done with me lmao😭 they're a little introverted and don't like new people, but every week I'm bringing in people from lower or higher grades to sit with us during lunch, and let me tell ya, it takes them WEEKS to get along together. I'm pretty sure that there's a sob story behind why nobody likes that one classmate, but whatever it is, I bet it's some stupid teenage drama. I feel like I'm on their side even without knowing the full story, and I wanna make sure to make them feel wanted and loved. But idk, maybe I'm just being too open and my hopes are WAY too high. But whatever???? Everyone needs a sunshine-person in their life, and I don't mind doing that for free🤑🤑🤑

[golbrocklovely]

not the same anon but i wanna add to the alcohol thing. go out,have fun, do you but stas has posted herself out drinking and celebrating getting drunk,being hungover, and curing that hangover with more drinking. i dunno what’s happened to kat, it was probably already in her but she does a lot of this often now almost as if this were the go to choice of beverage. they both have posted themselves pregaming to go out and get drunk and one of them just posted a tiktok where both are holding 2 drinks each. Im honestly glad someone else pointed this out and noticed it too because most of the fandom seems to praise them and treat it like the anon said all cutesy and silly when its not.

I remember last year people blaming snc as a bad influence on the girls for drinking and look now. It wasnt snc it was them. the boys are working and theyre fine. these two are using this as a crutch. also how can you not feel emotionally,mentally, and even physically exhausted going out every night and doing this.sam legit quoted stas last year saying she rather drink than eat.

i'm gonna combine these two asks together since they are about the same thing. hope you don't mind.

this is kinda long so... i'm sorry about that.

so the last time i talked about this type of stuff/the last time i got asks about stas and kat drinking was back in 2021/22 and any time i made the same argument i'm gonna make now, i got chewed out bc ppl misinterpreted what i said and felt like i was minimizing alcoholism. as someone that has had family members on both sides have addiction issues with alcohol (along with other things), i'm not one to be blase about alcoholism. this is also not me shrugging off the real issue that stas and kat could have addiction problems.

however…. we don't know them. we only see what they post. and it's not impossible that they make it seem like they're drinking a lot when in actuality they might only be having one or two drinks. does that make what they're doing any better? no. i'm not making that argument. what i'm trying to say is that we shouldn't jump to conclusions when we don't know the full story. plus, you can't diagnosis someone via a couple stories and snapchat or two. that's just reality.

does that mean that them joking about being alcoholics is cool? no it's not. it's really dumb at the very least, and extremely dark at the most. my hope and my personal belief is that they are just partying a bunch and made some tasteless jokes. i remember when i was in college, basically the same age (if not younger) as them, and ppl around me would joke about being alcoholics. i didn't find it funny, but they did. and i'm gonna assume that it's the same thing with them. that it's not them casually telling their fanbase that they have addictions issues, but more "omg isn't it so funny how we drink every night when we party??"

i don't think this behavior is great, especially since a lot of snc's younger fans have drifted into being these two girls' fans. it's not cute to aspire to be drunkards in your early 20s. you wanna go out and have your fun, so be it. but be realistic about what your limit is. also, you don't have to hit your limit every night. you don't have to drink every night either.

but again, as i stated before, i don't think they actually have addiction issues. if they did, that's for them and ppl close to them who know them to discuss and figure out. not for us to speculate over a couple stories and snapchats. i don't pay attention to them enough to really know one way or the other, but regardless i think it's best to not assume something's wrong. if it is really that much of an issue to anyone reading this, maybe reach out to them somehow and tell them you're concerned. or if it's too triggering, which is totally understandable, just block them and move on.

i truly wish them the best, and i hope their fans know that excessive drinking is not good for you.

[love-hatred-stuff]

Just a dream } Lim Sejun [victon]

genre: yandere, mild smut, fluff (,angst?)

warning(s): mentions of killing & stalking, suggestive!, mentions of other idols (subin&byungchan)

word count: about 3.3k

note: If u feel uncomfortable with any of the warnings above, feel free to skip! I will probably do more parts :)

I'm not that good in writing smut but I wanted it to be not too dirty, like there's sexual tension but everything is on a comfortable level

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Third person's POV

at school

Lim Sejun was your best friend, along with his stepbrother Jung Subin. You actually met Sejun through Subin.

At first only Subin was your classmate since 5th grade and you too eventually became really close. And later on, about two years, Sejun joined you because he moved here, when his Mom wanted to marry your other friends Dad.

You never never had romantic feelings for Subin, you just loved him as a friend.

But his stepbrother was something different. It wasn't like you had a crush on him, he just made you so nervous all the time.

You didn't show it, but inside you always slightly get butterflies everytime he stares at you or uses his deep voice to convince you to something.

Not to mention his looks, but he could do many things that made him get most girls attention. Though he never cared about girls except for you.

He was a rather cold person, kept most things to himself and didn't laugh very often. But when he did, it always made you happy aswell.

It was mostly you that made him giggle or smile but you never questioned it.

You were just grateful to have them as your friends. Even though the brothers fought like literally almost all the time.

But what you noticed is that Sejun was very protective over you. What you didn't know was caused by the obsession he had over you.

In the Beginning it was only a little crushing, adoring you secretly. This soon turned into serious, strong feelings, and desire that he kept inside and eventually real love.

Of course you obviously didn't know about his "little" possession, but you were everything to him and nothing would steal you from him.

Anyone that touched you inappropriately, wasn't blessed to live a long life. And he made sure of that. The killing wasn't a big deal for him, as long as you were safe it didn't matter.

School was long over, but you and Sejun were still sitting in the library to do homework and explain math to Subin when he had problems, which was like constantly.

"God, Subin! I explained this to you like a hundred times. It's Sejun's turn now, he is even smarter than me." You groaned at your friends intolerance.

You desperately looked at the dark haired boy, who sat on a chair and concentratedly wrote something on a paper.

When he was just giving you a look with a frown you sighed.

"Help your brother for gods sake! I can't do this anymore. I finished anyways, I could just go if I wanted to." You complained in a whiny manner.

Sejun still looked at you and than shortly at Subin. He shook his head.

"I'm not helping him. He has to learn himself. And he's just my stepbrother. Not my problem." He shrugged and turned to his paper.

Subin just looked absolutely cluelessly at the many numbers and even letters.

"Please Sejun! Your Mom told me to help him. She will think I'm dumb as well!" You continued, to stubborn to give up first.

"Hey!" Subin faked a hurtful look, laying his hand on his heart.

"Sorry, Binnie. But I won't explain this to you again." You touched his shoulder, smiling exclusively.

Now Sejun also noticed the contact between you too and made a noise to seperate you again and get your attention.

Your head turned to him, hoping he changed his mind.

But he just saw one thing at this moment; your thigh that was exposed because of the skirt that had slipped up 'til the beginning of you lace slip.

His eyes fixated on your beautiful legs and his mind went wild automatically. He was aroused immediately, imagining he was the one who could take it off of you.

You didn't bother to look down, where he was looking. You were just thinking he zoned out for a moment at waved your hand on front of his iced eyes.

"Sejun? Are you okay?" You wondered.

When he came back to reality he noticed how tight his jeans felt so suddenly. But managed to look up at you finally.

"Huh? Oh, yes. I will only explain this once to him, and I wanna get a treat." He wanted to compromise.

You waited a moment to process and decide if you wanted to compromise.

"Okay. What do want as your treat?" You asked innocently.

Sejun thought. How could he indirectly say that he wanted to be alone with you?

"You will go with me studiying tomorrow, after school." He grinned, secretly so excited to have you to himself for some hours.

Your eyes widened. Another study session?

"Fine, but why so obsessed with studiying? School's not everything, Junnie." You told him.

He stayed silent. If you knew what I want to do to you right now, Y/N. He thought, very aware of his bulge, growing even harder. But he couldn't do anything about it, he had to hide under the table until it would hopefully disappear.

After about half an hour, he had made everything clear for Subin. Well, supposedly. And the three of you went home.

Subin couldn't hold a moan back as he touched his boner through his black jeans. He hadn't been able to hold back the dirty thoughts of you telling him that you wanted him as much as he did. And now that he was finally home, he could release some of his inholded sexual sounds. He rarely listened to anyone but gladly would accept you as his domme.

He just loved you so much, of course he was craving for your touch. You were his only weakness at this point.

•••

the next day

You could walk to school because your house wasn't that far away. You didn't know that Sejun was always behind you, to make sure you came home safe and to enjoy your pretty features a little longer.

When you arrived and waited for you two only friends and greeted Subin happily with hug and a minute later Sejun with a sweet "Hey." Because you knew he didn't really enjoy skinship.

He greeted back politely. And thought about how pretty you looked again, although he saw you everyday in the same school uniform.

He secretly hated that the girls had to wear skirts in school. So he gave every boy who dared to look at you a second too long a warning glare to fuck off. And if they wouldn't hear, he would made sure they would never look at you again.

It was normal for him, he would keep you forever. And no one would destroy his plan.

~~

School had ended fast and you bid your goodbyes to Subin and went to the library.

You sat down next to each other and your knees would touch every now and then, making Sejun wanting to already moan your name out loud, by just this simple touch.

~~

One hour had passed and you slowly got bored, as you were just too done to concentrate on school stuff any longer.

"Sejun~" You whined, tucking on his blazer.

Holy fuck. He thought. I want you to whine my name like this again.

He tried to not look much affected and hummed as a response to you.

"I'm bored. I don't wanna study anymore. Let's just do something different, yes?" You tried to convince him with puppy eyes.

"What can we do?" He asked quietly, unsure if he would maybe be alowed to touch you a little.

"Kiss?" You said, leaning forward.

It wasn't really your intention but he could see some of your cleavage in this position. He told himself to keep control.

You laughed sweetly. He was so cute when he blushed.

You were just joking. But didn't know he was actually craving for the touch of your lips, just once. Once would be enough and he would be the luckiest man alive.

Now you frowned, he still wasn't looking away from your lips.

"Sejun, I was just jo-" You couldn't finish.

His hands snaked around your waist to sit you on his lap in a fast motion, disrupting you.

Him touching you in this way, affected you more than you wanted to admit.

"What are you doing?" You whispered.

Your butt sat on his thighs, your feet touched the ground. And your faces weren't that far away from each other either.

"I thought you were bored." His raspy voice made you feel the familiar butterflies in your stomach.

"Yeah, but what do want now?" You still whispered, so exited for his next move.

He grabbed your hips with more force, to shove you even further to his face.

A groan escaped his throat at the sudden friction he felt of your core grinding on his.

"You don't wanna know what I want to do to you Y/N."

He let his finger slide over your lower lip.

Why was he so changed all out of the blue?

He had waited for years to feel you right there where you sat on in this moment.

"Do you want me to stay still or move?" You asked as you were ready to risk it all.

You were feeling so out of this world, like someone would have drugged you. But you liked it, yeah, you enjoyed it.

"It's your choice, kitten. But be aware that if you cross a certain line I won't be able told back and take you right here, right now." He warned you in a husky voice, while breathing in all of your body right in his hands.

You let out a whiny moan at his dirty talking. You were kinda ready to get to his limits.

"It's okay, just tell me when I have to stop." You breathed out, against his neck.

As he felt your hot breath hit his exposed skin and at the same time, your hips moving into his he fekt like in heaven.

"Y/N~ah." He moaned out and threw his head back.

He felt like he would come right on the spot.

Between your movements you also let out hitched breaths at the immense pleasure your where giving and receiving, although you both still where having all your clothes on. But you forgot about that long ago.

Your bodys where still rocking together as he was watching all of your little expressions that showed on your face.

Though, at some point when you begin to settle kisses on his neck, jaw and cheeks, he couldn't hold himself back any longer and wanted to warn you again so it wouldn't escalate.

"Y/N, Y/N-ah, stop, it's too much!" He almost cried out for you.

You obeyed and stopped, panting a little.

"It's okay." You stroke his cheek. "We can continue this another time, Junnie." You promised.

His eyes flashed with exitement, as he struggled to come down from this so unreal seeming experience with you.

"I- I will just finish this work sheet. I have to calm down." Sejun told me as he got his ability to talk back.

He never thought, he would be able to find the confidence and touch you like this.

And you even agreed!

It was like a dream.

•••

Well, maybe it really was.

Sejun's POV

"Junnie, wake up!" Y/N shook me gently.

I was suddenly torned from my deep sleep. I breathed out and groaned.

I had dreamed everything?!

I felt so disappointed. I wished it would have happened in reality, it was the most pleasureable thing I had ever experienced in my life.

And it came out as just another wet dream of mine.

At this moment I told myself to be more confident and don't behave like a creep that hated skinship.

I had to be more cool with it, orherwise I would never get what I was craving for desperately.

"Are you okay, Sejun-ah?" She looked at me a bit worried as I still wasn't reacting at all.

But her voice finally brought me back to reality.

"No Y/N, I'm not okay." I answered.

"What is it?" She wondered.

I struggled to come up with an excuse, so I decided to be honest with her.

"You and me, we were here in the library and-"

"Oh, that? You weren't dreaming, Junnie. It happened."

I widened my eyes. It wasn't a dream? I blushed.

"But why did I fell asleep then?" I wanted to know, since it all didn't really made sense.

"You wanted to finish your paper to calm down. Well, it worked, you fell asleep." She explained

Suddenly I remembered. I had never dreamed. It had happened in real life.

Maybe I should consider sleeping more instead of watching her. I thought to myself, it was unacceptable to fall asleep during spending time with her.

•••

Third person's POV

You were sitting in the cafeteria of your Highschool, talking to your two guy friends.

It was a day like every other and everything was normal, except for Sejun's behaviour.

He was getting more confident in touching you but immediately blushed when he noticed that you were looking at him with a concerned face.

It was not like you lost interest or anything, you were still reacting to his teasing as intense as before. But you didn't thought he would want the two of you to keep doing these things.

Everything began two days ago in the library. He was getting more and more crazy for you each second.

Right in the moment he was secretly watching you talking to his stepbrother.

You were pure beauty in his eyes and he couldn't stop looking at your soft features and feminine body.

How you used your whole body while demonstrating something to Subin was something Sejun found absolutely adorable.

Every now and then you also glanced at him so he had to act like he wouldn't been staring at you the whole break long and mostly just nodded when you asked for his opinion or just wanted to include him in the conversation.

Sejun almost forgot to eat while being so busy admiring you.

When the bell rang for third period all the students stood up and he noticed that he wasn't the only one who didn't eat most of his food.

"Y/N you only ate your salad." Sejun walked next to you and pointed at your still full tablet with his finger.

You both were walking the same direction to put your tablets away and turn to your class after.

"Oh yeah, I'm not that hungry." You tried to explain.

But the actual reason was something else. You couldn't ignore Sejun's attentive look on you the whole time. You tried your best to ignore this weird feeling in you stomach but it was difficult when you knew that you had to endure that until you would be home.

"But you need to eat, to have enough energy for class." He pointed out while you made your way to the classroom.

Even if all his actions were meant to be innocent without any dirty intentions, it was hard for you to forget how you were sitting directly on his hard boner and could hear these pornografic sounds coming out of his mouth.

You liked how he had reacted to you in some way. Because no one ever had made you feel so wanted like he did that evening.

And you really gave your best to delete it from your memory but you just couldn't when you saw him every single day and felt how tensed he sometimes was. It reminded you of the Sejun that had called you Kitten.

You noticed you hadn't answered him yet and snapped out of your wild thoughts.

"Yes, I know but I have enough energy left. I promise, Junnie." You assured as you two arrived at the right room.

He just gave you a worried look and settled down on his seat like you did.

The three of you weren't directly seated next to each other but close, so the boys could still have an eye on you.

The teacher came in as well and the lesson began soon after.

Byungchan was sitting next to you since a few days, but you have no problem with that because he's very nice. Sometimes he would try to flirt with you and you would just act like you wouldn't know what he was doing.

He was also very handsome and popular at your school, though that hadn't had any affect on you. You just cared about the work you had to do together, nothing else.

Although... you do blushed when he made you a compliment, simply because you found it charming and sweet of him to care about how you looked.

What you didn't know was that Sejun was on the verge of killing him every single day since he sits next to you.

He even asked himself how to quickly and inconspicuously as possible have this done. So he would get rid of him finally.

He was so angry inside but told himself to keep his control awhile longer. You shouldn't suffer under his death too much so Sejun wanted to wait a little longer and threathen Byungchan first, to better stop flirting with you or else he had to be killed.

After a while the class was dismissed and for you, school had ended already. You completely had missed the time and were happy to be able to leave the school building already.

You packed your stuff and didn't even notice that Sejun was standing in front of you.

While he waited he stared down at you until he finally spoke up.

"Hey, Y/N. Do want to go eat ice-cream and hang out a bit maybe?" He asked as he restlessly scratched his neck.

You looked up, surprised to hear his voice instead of Subin's.

"Umm yeah, sure. But where's Subin?" You wanted to know, furrowing your brows and scanning the room to find you other friend.

"He had to leave early today. Mom told him to do his homework once in a lifetime." Sejun's monotonous voice was back and he was a little sad that you wanted to have Subin with you so badly.

You chuckled and put on your blazer and then your backpack, before you nodded at him to move on.

All students had left the classroom already so you were alone.

He started to shiver instead of leaving the room as he knew that he had to speak about what had happened between you two.

"Y/N.. I think we maybe need to talk." His shy self was back again.

"About what?" You asked, as you were wondering if he really would mention the incident again.

"About that day.. when you and I.." He wasn't able to finish his sentence, he was too insecure.

She probably doesn't want me to touch her anyways. Sejun thought and closed his eyes in brief.

"It's okay, Sejun-ah. We can just forget about it if you want." You patted his shoulder as you weren't really sure what to say or do.

"That's not it, Y/N. I want your permission to my touch. I want to be closer to you and not make you uncomfortable." The black haired boy looked to the ground, expecting you to be grossed out.

"You have my permission Sejun-ah, it's okay with me if you touch me more. I like it because I always enjoy your company. You have to know that, alright?" You gave him a warm smile when he finally found the courage to look at you.

He kept quite and nodded before leaving school with you.

He couldn't say it, but he deeply wanted to hold your hand.

You thought and felt the same so you just took the first step and interwined your hand with his.

You didn't expect this to be more than a close friendship but you enjoyed it anyways. As he always made you feel so safe and loved.

And Sejun was feeling like he just got everything he wanted in a matter of seconds. He would protect you, not caring about the rest of the world.

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

I edited the story cover by myself but the pictures are not mine (so is the gif), credits to the owners :)

[twinkies-posts]

I do care , dumbass.

Bakugou x buksquad

Waring: none , fluff soft caring bakugou with his little family hc

Have fun!

Mina:

Bakugou is mina's big bro , he acts like it all the time

Whenever someone dares to bother mina or tell her something that makes her sad , oh God

Bakugou will kill them

No no, he will literally bunch them and force them to apologize to mina

"Apologize you damn extra"

Whenever it's her period he is the only one of the squad who really knows how to deal with it

"Eat your food pinky, I will get you chocolate if you finished it"

The boy is sooo good in fashion, he really cares about how his girl dress, will go to shopping with her

"Am only here because if you are a part of my squad I will not accept you have a bad fashion taste "

Do tik toks with her whenever she is sad just so she become happy again

"Yah yah I will dance with you or whatever, dumbass"

He is really so soft for her , especially when she is the only girl in his squad, he will never let anyone hurt her and will always keep an eye on her and on everyone who is dating her

Denki :

Denki is a smart dumb person

Bakugou knows that , he treats him that way

So denki is not that smart in school stuff, he have trouble studying and understand things

In the other hand , bakugou is the top of the class , you see where am I going with this?

One night bakugou found denki crying in the kitchen because he can't understand anything and they have exams

And the whole thing goes like

"Hey pikachu, why the fuck are you crying in the Kitchen? It's 2 in the damn morning "

"S..sorry _ taking a breath_ it's just ..I can't understand anything and I feel so dumb and a-"

"Shut the fuck up , let me see what are you studying "

He came closer to denki, standing behind him to watch the books in front of the sad boy

"Calm down , God you are so dramatic pikachu...I will help you just stop crying "

"You will?"

"Yes , now go to sleep , we will start tomorrow...Jesus ! Crying at 2 am because you can't study? Who does that , dumbass?"

Denki laughed a little and smiled

"Thanks bakugou "

"Thc, just go to sleep already "

From that day bakugou was there to help denki with his studies all the time, small study dates with the buksquad become a habit, he will not let his squad fall behind

If anyone out of their class talked shit about denki they are so done

"WTF DID YOU SAY ? COME ON SAY IT AGAIN YOU DAMN EXTRA!"

he is really protective about denki because 1. Denki us dumb, 2. He is a sweet boy and it's easy to break his heart

Kirishima:

Kiri is a sweat heart, he trains so much with strong people so he gets stronger

So when kiri came one day to him , asking him to train together bakugou didn't totally mind

"Hey bakubro? I was wondering if you want to train with me?"

"I don't mind " he mumbled

So after every rough training season kirishima is tired , hungry and dirty

"Take a damn shower kirishima"

The first time they trained together and after they finished bakugou took a quick shower and started making some food for both of them

"What is that smell?" Kiri asked as he walks to the kitchen

"Am making food?"

"Wow bakubro I didn't know you can cook ! This is so manly"

"Thc , of course I can cook dumbass! Now set down the food is ready"

"You cooked for me too?"

"No , but it's enough for both of us anyway " he said with an annoyed voice and kiri smiled brightly

"Thanks man , I was going to eat some fast Making noodles or anything "

"Yoh can't eat that after training, your body needs healthy food dumbass "

"Yes but I can't cook-"

"Just set down and eat , shitty hair"

After this , he will make food for kiri almost every day , sometimes he makes food for all of his squad and sometimes it's just a quick thing for kiri

He really loves how kiri smiles every time he gives him food after training, it turns to be a habit so fast and now he does it most of the time mindlessly, he just makes food enough for his boys _ and mina_

Sero :

Sero is my fav baby here

He is sweet, chill and lovely

Bakugou likes to spend time with him because he don't talk too much and from time to time they smoke weed together

Sero teaches Bakugou Spanish, you can't convince me otherwise.

So yah bakugou does really like this guy, and he is protective around him too

If anyone said anything about sero being boring bakugou gets M A D

"WANNA TRY AND SAY THAT AGAIN DUMBASS??? WANNA TRY AND INSULT MY BOYS IN FRONT OF ME AGAIN??"

He and sero goes out together to skate

Surprisingly, bakugou is really good at it

Whenever bakugou is having a problem sero helps him and listen to him

Whenever sero needs someone to spend time with (smoking, playing guitar, talking) bakugou is there

They have chill nights where they watch something together

They make bets all the time

Bakugou let no one talks bad about his chill boy

In the end :

His squad keeps him sane , they take good care of him and makes sure he is okay

And he does it back , aggressively yes but he do

He cares for them from the bottom of his heart because they are not just his squad but also his chosen family

He will never admit it out loud anyway but they know it and it makes them feel so warm and fuzzy from inside 🥺🖤

Hope you enjoyed this🖤

[possiamo-andare]

Liar: JJ Maybank

JJ x Reader

(gif made by @rudypankows )

MASTERLIST

word count: over 9k (haha)

a/n: this is very angsty and I barely edited because it's so long. I'm so sorry in advance, the ending kinda sucks. I hope y'all like it tho!

description: this is a one part imagine, involving JJ and the reader (y/n). The reader and JJ meet at a beach party one night and start sleeping with eachother, but only staying friends. Soon, they fall for eachother and a sexual relationship turns into a romantic one. But JJ is hiding something and once it is revealed, will they ever be the same?

~

You rarely lied. As a kid, you would get hives when you lied to someone; your guilty conscience affecting your body. Lying was typically a very hard thing for you to do. It meant you were betraying someone's trust, and since you couldn't bear upsetting anyone, you couldn't lie. It got you in trouble all the time but your inability to lie was also your greatest strength. People appreciate your honesty and found your personality magnetic.

With that being said, you lied that night and it didn't even hurt you. 

He had looked so good, you told yourself that. That was the problem. He had just looked so damn good that night at the beach almost anyone would lie to themselves to get him. Even just a taste.

You wanted to ignore him at first. Maybe if you didn't care enough, he wouldn't notice you. Because, god, if he noticed you, then he'd come over and then you couldn't promise anything. So, you averted your gaze and instead paid attention to Kie as she spoke, telling you about the newest charity she was saving money to donate to. You had, once in a while, glanced his way but he had always been looking somewhere else so you thought that he hadn't noticed your stares. Until, you had accidentally looked his way when he was watching you. You knew it was an honest mistake and something that eventually would've happened since you were looking so often, but you were embarrassed nonetheless. You were trying to convince yourself he didn't even notice you when he walked your way. You felt his eyes burning into you and you mustered every ounce of self control you had and didn't look at him as he walked closer and closer to you and Kie.

When he finally approached, he spoke to Kie first. "Hey Kie." His eyes drifted towards you again, this time a smirk evident on his face. Him watching you made you shift uncomfortably. You knew he was taking you all in.

Kie smiled at him and briefly hugged him. Then she looked at you, a nervous smile on your face, as she introduced you. "This is my friend Y/N. Y/N, this is JJ."

You nodded towards JJ. "Hi." That name sounded familiar but you couldn't quite remember. You went to the same school as Kie, you being a Pogue but getting a scholarship to the academy. You were an intelligent individual but you knew, when it came to boys, you were just about the dumbest person in the world. You'd probably sell your left kidney just for a kiss with this boy you had never met before. It was dumb, but you were a teenager and hopefully would grow out of it.

"Hey, nice to meet you." He extended his hand for you to shake.

You looked down at it and shook it, electricity coursing through your veins.

"What's your last name?" 

JJ smirked, sizing you up once more. "Maybank."

JJ Maybank. You had heard about JJ and the things you heard didn't necessarily put a good taste in your mouth. But who were you to judge? Besides he was hot, and you doubted he would ever go for you. This was a harmless feeling.

Except it wasn't. One second, you were talking to JJ about surfing and the next second he was asking if you'd like to come back to his place. It had all happened so fast you were sure you had misunderstood him when he spoke. But then he asked you again and you were surprised. What surprised you even more was that you said yes. 

"This is a one time thing." You lied to JJ, untying your shoes at his doorway. 

He removed his shirt, pushing his hair out of his face. "Okay." He was smirking at you as you undressed, almost as if he didn't believe what you said. 

You believed yourself that night, but soon came to realize that was so far from the truth. That one night had been amazing and you had thought that would be it. But it was not that easy. It never was with JJ. Before you knew it, only a week later, you saw him again. This time with a brunette leaning against him.

You had been invited by Kie again to meet John B. and Pope. You had gladly decided to come, partly because you wanted to meet Kie's other friends and also because you knew JJ would be there. But you hadn't expected him to be kissing someone else. Although you wanted it to be you, you knew that wasn't possible. Besides, why did you care? You were not gonna let some blonde Pogue mess with you. It was one night. It was amazing, but you had told him never again. 

Then, it happened again. You were talking to John B. about helping him fix his car when, out of nowhere, JJ entered the conversation. He stood beside you and barely spoke but you felt his presence and that was enough. Once you and him were alone again, the conversation was short.

"Hey." He stated, matter-of-factly.

"Hi." You replied, pushing the hair out of your face.

"Didn't think I'd see you here." JJ smirked, taking a few steps closer to you. You remembered how harshly you swallowed. Boys like JJ rarely made you nervous.

"Well I am." You said defensively. You weren't about to let this boy play you. "Sorry I interrupted your fun with the brunette. What's her name?"

JJ chuckled. "Lacey. And you ruined nothing. To be honest, I wish it was you."

And then, that was it. Again, for the second time, you were in JJ's bed. Your clothes had been torn off before your body had even hit the bed. Shortly after JJ's were too. You barely had time to think, let alone speak but you managed to in between kisses.

"This is the last time." You smirked, both of you now knowing you were lying. 

You wished you weren't lying that night. You wished you hadn't slept with JJ again. Maybe, you thought, everything that happened after would've been easier.

After that second night, you and JJ started a relationship. He wasn't your boyfriend, he made that clear to you. You hadn't really wanted him to be anyways. You had just gotten out of a long term relationship and didn't want your heart broken. You chose the wrong guy again because JJ loved breaking hearts. He did it for fun.

The rules were simple. You'd only call each other at night and you would leave right after. No real conversations, no love, just sex. And for a month, that was easy enough. You needed him during that month as much as he needed you. You weren't looking for something serious, just to fool around. You were sick and tired of commitment and heartbreak and just wanted to relax and have fun. JJ never had commitments and enjoyed the company. He hadn't had a girlfriend in ages and there was rarely a girl who wanted this kind of relationship. He was really happy to know that you were that type of girl. And he believed that as long as you continued to be that type of girl, this could go on forever. 

Except it didn't. 

You weren't really sure when everything changed but if you had to guess, you'd say it was the night he climbed through your bedroom window. 

Your parents were out on a date night when you heard tapping on your window. At first you thought it was the tree outside your room but when it persisted, you decided to look for yourself. That's where you found JJ, leaning against your window sill. In a moment of shock, you opened the window and pulled him through. You were so shocked to see him mostly because the rules had been that if he wanted to have sex, he had to call you first. You had just been on your phone and since you hadn't gotten a call or text, you wondered why he was here in the first place. You were so shocked to see him here you almost didn't see his face. But once you did, you couldn't look away.

As he took a seat on the edge of your bed, you gasped. Not only was his face covered in blood and open wounds, he clutched his right side, as if he had broken a rib. You didn't hate blood, you hated the smell. To you, blood smelled like old iron and it made you nauseous. You probably would've become a doctor if it wasn't for the fact that the smell of blood made you nauseous. Maybe it was all the adrenaline of seeing JJ outside your window or the fact that he was badly beaten up, but you didn't feel nauseous when you smelled the blood coming off him. Your mind was too busy to remember to be nauseous. 

You went to sit beside him, your hand coming to touch his face. "JJ..." The second your hand touched his cheek, he winced and pulled away.

"My dad got drunk." JJ stated, looking at his feet. He was clearly embarrassed and when you didn't speak, he continued. "I didn't know where to go. John B. is with Sarah and I don't wanna bother Pope or Kie."

You nodded. "I'm gonna get you cleaned up."

You knew JJ's dad was a deadbeat father. Everyone in OBX did. When he wasn't gambling, he was getting piss drunk in his home. A lot of people believed that JJ would bear the brunt of his father's alcoholism but you didn't want to believe it. You didn't want to believe that a father hurt his only child. Your parents weren't the best, being Pogues they rarely parented and you were frequently left to your own devices, but they never laid a finger on you. You didn't want to believe someone as seemingly happy as JJ would be suffering from physical abuse behind closed doors. Now, you knew it to be true.

You wanted to cry for JJ. But you stayed strong and fixed him the best you could. You got some disinfectant and a cloth, with tons and tons of bandages and got to work. First, you washed his face. As the water cleansed his face, your sink started to look like a crime scene. The amount of blood that went down the drain almost made you think that people's water was gonna start to taste like iron. Once his face was washed, you realized that there were only really two big gashes on his face. One, right over his cheek and the other on his forehead. With some disinfectant and bandages, you knew it would heal in a couple of weeks. As for JJ, you didn't know if he would heal.

"This is gonna hurt." You said as you held the cloth you soaked in disinfectant. JJ was sitting on the edge of your bathtub as you spoke to him. 

He nodded. "Got any liquor?"

You smiled, shaking your head. "Sorry."

JJ sighed, shrugging his shoulders. "It's whatever."

And with that, you started to disinfect his wounds. At first, he was wincing but the more you cleaned, the less he did. Finally, when the two wounds on his face were clean, you put three bandages on each wound. Then, you moved onto his side, where he was clutching it tenderly. You knew that this was way out of your area of expertise but you wanted to help the best you could. And you knew JJ would never agree to go to a hospital. 

"You gotta take off your shirt." You stated, pointing to the bloody shirt he still was wearing.

JJ smirked, looking down. "You want me right now?"

You couldn't help but smile. Even in this state, he could make you laugh. How was he so strong? "No. I need to see if you're hurt anywhere else."

JJ nodded, still smirking as he lifted his shirt over his head. "Anything to see me naked."

You were about to counter with a snarky remark, but you never got the chance. Your breath was caught in your throat when you saw what was underneath JJ's shirt. Where he was clutching his side, was a large purple bruise that expanded through his entire side. It was horrendous and you knew it would turn black before it started to heal but that wasn't even the worst of it. There were smaller bruises all over his stomach and back. They were small but you could tell they were large before and were just starting to heal. You wondered how you didn't see them before. It was dark when you were together but it couldn't have been that dark. Granted, you weren't really looking out to see if there was bruising but you couldn't believe that you had missed these before.

You were silent for minutes and finally, JJ spoke. "I never wanted you to see them. That's why I want to only see you at night."

You looked to JJ's face, his expression unreadable. Although he was expressionless, you were not. Your face was in a deep frown and there were tears pooling in your eyes, threatening to spill over any moment. You wanted to speak, but you didn't know what you could say. What was there to say?

Finally, you found your voice. "JJ..." Your voice was weak and soft, filled with emotion. You reached for his hand but when he realized you were about to cry, he pulled away.

"No," he said defiantly. "Don't get emotional. I'm fine." He was acting so strong. Why?

You nodded, blinking back tears. You refused to cry. "I'll get you some ice. Go lay on my bed."

You barely looked at JJ in the face as you left the bathroom to go get ice. This was too much for you, and it seemed like another normal Saturday night for JJ. You couldn't decide whether to feel so bad for him or angry that he wasn't letting you cry. You knew he was holding back tears, just like you, but he resented that you wanted to cry. You knew you weren't strong like JJ. All this time, all those beatings, and you would've cracked. You would've ran away or worse, but JJ kept going back. That night, your opinion of JJ changed. 

The rest of the night consisted of you icing JJ's side and not speaking. You tried to get him to talk but he refused. You started with asking him about why his dad was doing this and for how long but he wouldn't answer you. Then you asked what had happened this time but he didn't want to talk about it. He complained he was tired and just wanted to sleep. You knew this was breaking a rule, but you cuddled beside him, laying your head in his chest to hear his heartbeat. He seemed way more calm when you were beside him.

Finally, after an hour of trying to get him to talk, you spoke for the last time. "Why'd you come to me?"

JJ shrugged one of his shoulders, the other one not moving because it was under your body. "I trust you."

You were shocked but too tired to say anything. You just laid there with him, hoping that you helped take some of the pain away. You hoped you had made some type of difference but you knew that with JJ, you were never sure.

After that night, things were different. JJ started calling you less and less and when you called him, he started making up more excuses. Sometimes you both went a week without speaking to each other and then he blamed it on how busy he was. You rarely hooked up, and when you did, it felt different. There was way more kissing and the kissing was more passionate and longer. Before, you had raced to take your clothes off and now, you let JJ make the first move. You felt different and at first, you thought it was because you felt closer to JJ. He had come to you in a time of need and you now were considered friends. That's why you thought it felt different. But then, JJ started acting very differently and you knew it wasn't just you. He would stay with you afterwards. He used to get dressed before you had time to catch your breath but now, he lingered on your bed and near you. You knew he wanted to stay the night but didn't know how to ask. And you were scared to tell him to stay. You didn't want to scare him. 

JJ was not the relationship type of guy but that's basically what you were. You had stopped sleeping with anyone else entirely after that night and focused solely on thinking of JJ. You knew what a crush felt like and you knew that you were developing feelings for JJ. But, it was so hard for you to know if he felt the same way. Sometimes, you were sure he felt the same way. There were days where he couldn't keep his hands off you and was so passionate you couldn't stop smiling. Then there were other days where he wouldn't text you back and didn't answer your calls. You weren't sure if he was sleeping with other girls but you didn't want to ask. If he was, you knew it would hurt you. 

Three days before the incident, JJ was having one of those days where he wasn't talking to you. You had texted him to ask him if he was going to Kie's party tonight but he only read it and didn't respond. You had just seen each other the night before and he was so loving and passionate that you thought for sure he felt the same. He had even stayed to cuddle afterward and talk to you about his day. You were smiling and laughing with each other and you were starting to feel like a real couple. Now, he wasn't responding to a simple question you asked. You felt so defeated. You couldn't tell what he was feeling and you felt like you were being strung along. You wanted to sit down and talk to him but you knew JJ and he didn't like that type of stuff. For JJ to even say he was happy was a lot since he rarely talked about his emotions. 

That day, you felt used. You knew he was playing you. You convinced yourself, in that moment, that if he likes you he would've already told you. You convinced yourself he didn't like you. You told yourself, if he came to Kie's party, you would ignore him all night and talk to some other guy. There was no reason to wait around for someone who didn't appreciate you. 

So, as you got ready for Kie's party, you turned off your phone. If he was gonna try to call or text you, you would make sure you couldn't see it. It would be way too tempting to keep your phone open. As you buttoned your shorts, you continued to tell yourself that this was for your own good. There's no point in being with someone who couldn't even decide if they liked you or not.

When you got to Kie's party, you instantly looked for alcohol. If you wanted to distract yourself, alcohol was your best option right now. You were halfway done with your second cup when Kie found you. 

"Hey honey." She said, slowly taking the drink out of your hands. You fought her grasp for a second but when she started to glare at you, you let the cup go.

You plastered on a fake smile. "Hi Kie."

She threw out the remainder of your drink before hugging you tightly. "You're gonna need to be sober tonight."

You frowned, your brain already a bit foggy. "Why?"

Kie let go of you, glancing at the beach for a moment before looking back at you. "Rafe is here." 

You wanted to gasp, but it came out more as a hiccup. Unfortunately, Rafe was your ex. You were together for a year before he cheated on you with someone else. You and Rafe had many great memories together but they were all tainted by the fact that he had cheated on you. Kie had told you from the beginning that a Pogue and a Kook dating was not a good idea but you were dumb and did it anyways. The good thing about Kie is that she never said I told you so. She just hugged you until you stopped crying. Now, you had to face Rafe for the first time since you broke up months ago. 

Surprisingly, you reacted normally. You shrugged, looking behind you to John B., who was handling the keg. "JB! Can ya get me another cup?"

John B. looked over to Kie, who was glaring at him. John B. knew not to mess with Kie. He then looked back to you and shook his head. "Sorry."

You frowned, glaring at Kie. "Seriously?"

Kie just smirked. "You need to be on your best behavior."

You shrugged, a devilish idea popping onto your mind. "I will."

Kie frowned. "I know that look."

You smiled, the idea in your head about to turn into a reality. "Step aside."

Kie shook her head but you were quick to push her away and walk ahead of her, straight in the direction of Rafe. Kie followed behind you, pleading for you not to talk to him. You had never resolved your problems with Rafe and you knew that was something he wanted to do. So, in an effort to get a rise out of JJ, you were gonna talk to Rafe. You knew he was somewhere at this party and if he saw you and his nemesis speaking again, you hoped he would cause a scene. It was a shitty thing to do but it was the only way to know how JJ truly felt about you.

Once you got closer to the ocean, you spotted Rafe. He was sipping on a red cup, probably filled with beer, as he talked to Topper. When he saw you, he almost spit out his drink. You locked eyes for a moment before Kie stepped in front of you, blocking your view of him. 

"No way. He cheated Y/N." Kie said, grabbing a hold of your hand.

You nodded. "I know."

Kie had a confused look on her face. "Then why talk to him?"

You looked over her shoulder and started to watch as Rafe made his way over to you. "Because of JJ."

Kie looked even more confused for a moment but then caught on. She had only suspected that there was something going on between the two of you but had no proof. Your omission right there was enough proof.

"Don't do this." Kie argued again, trying to convince you that this entire situation was a bad idea. She had seen what a jealous JJ was capable of and she knew if he felt even some feelings for you, this would not end well.

"If JJ can't admit his feelings towards me, I'll just talk to someone you will." You said to Kie, finally looking away from her one last time. 

Right behind Kie stood Rafe. The red cup in his hand before was now gone and he was smiling at you. He had come tonight knowing you'd probably be here. He knew he had made a mistake and was willing to fix it between the two of you. You were always such a good girlfriend and he missed hanging out with you. He hoped you were open to fixing things too.

"Hey." Rafe said, causing Kie to turn around. She took one look at Rafe and rolled her eyes before looking back at you. You smiled at her and she sighed, walking away. Kie was done. If this is what you wanted, there was no way to stop you.

"Hi Rafe." You giggled, twirling your hair around your finger. You needed to be extra flirty with Rafe. The more you acted like you still liked him, you hoped the more upset JJ would be.

"I wanted to talk to you. I hoped we could talk about what happened." He said, stepping closer to you.

You nodded, holding back a gag. Truth be told, there was nothing on this earth that could make you like Rafe again. "Sure."

"I just wanna say how fucking sorry I am." Rafe began, grabbing your hand. You wanted to flinch but you didn't. "I was such a fool and I realize that now. I want you back Y/N."

You smiled, pretending to be happy with what he was saying. To be honest, you wanted to gag. The boy had cheated on you for half of your relationship with a girl that, as far as you knew, he was still seeing. There was no way in hell you would ever take him back. He didn't have to know that. You felt like it was justice now. Maybe Rafe was getting what he deserved.

Before you could speak and tell Rafe you were willing to give him a chance, you felt two hands on your arm. The hands grabbed where Rafe was holding your arm and ripped you both away. You recognized the person immediately. It was JJ, and he was fuming. He barely even looked at you as he made his way to stand in front of you, standing in between you and Rafe.

JJ turned to you, his brows furrowed and his jaw set. "What the hell are you doing?"

You rolled your eyes. "Just talking to Rafe."

Rafe moved from behind JJ to beside him. He grabbed a hold of JJ's shoulder and tried to move him. JJ didn't budge, still glaring at you. You knew it was working. Finally, you had some type of answer. JJ had unresolved feelings for you. Now, he just had to admit it.

"Why?" JJ questioned, glaring at Rafe for a moment before looking to you again. Although he was mad, you could tell his expression softened when he looked at you.

Before you could speak, Rafe grabbed a hold of JJ's shoulders and pushed him away from me. Then, Rafe spoke. "We're trying to work shit out."

JJ moved out of the way but only enough for Rafe to squeeze forward. You kept your eyes on JJ, who was now beyond confused. Rafe was speaking to you again but you tuned him out and watched as JJ tried to figure out why the hell you would want to work things out with Rafe. Finally, it seemed to click. When it did, JJ grabbed your hand and pulled you away from Rafe. Your hand felt as if it was on fire and you wanted to smile so badly but you kept the frown on your face. Rafe tried to follow you but JJ stood in front of him so your eyes were only on JJ's now.

As you looked into his eyes, he grabbed a hold of your shoulders and brought you close to him. "If you want to know how I feel, just ask me."

Rafe spoke up now. "What the fuck are you -"

"Rafe!" You spoke up, glaring at Rafe for a moment. You tore your gaze away from JJ for a moment only to finally give Rafe a piece of your mind. "I'd only get back together with you if we were the last two people on earth, and maybe not even then."

Rafe was taken aback. He had definitely not thought you were going to act so rude but you could care less. "JJ..." Rafe began to say but JJ ignored him. You didn't know why Rafe was so confused by JJ's reaction but you didn't care. JJ was about to tell you how he felt and that was all that mattered.

There was nothing for Rafe to say to make you like him and he knew it. So, with that, he turned and left. Finally, your eyes were back on JJ. 

"You have to tell me." You said, crossing your arms over your chest.

JJ smirked, cupping your face in his hands. "You have to ask me."

You rolled your eyes. "How do you feel?"

JJ smiled this time, pulling you closer. "I like you Y/N. A lot."

You smiled back, wanting to scream for joy. Finally, there was no more confusion. "I like you too. A lot."

Finally, the two of you kissed. There was no more confusion or lies. It was just you and JJ, kissing. This kiss was different. It was full of promises. You liked each other, for real now, and you were not afraid to admit it. This is what it felt like to kiss someone you liked you, wholeheartedly. Someone who wanted you. Someone who cared. It had been so long since you had kissed someone who had cared about you.

That weekend before the incident, was probably the best weekend of your life. It was just you and JJ the entire weekend. The first two days were spent at your house. You just stayed together, half naked, talking and laughing and watching tv. There was no drama or confusion. It was just you and him. The kisses felt so real. The feelings felt so good. You felt a little more whole. You felt as though JJ felt the same. Those two days at your house were not only passionate but they were also a time where you got to know one another. This entire time, the both of you didn't know much about each other. Those two days in your house were spent getting to know each other. You learned that JJ loved fixing cars and wanted to own a hot tub one day. You knew his favourite colour and his favourite sport. And finally he opened up about his dad. When the abuse began, when it got worse and even what instigated his father that night he came to your house. You didn't cry and neither did he. You just soaked in his words and let him say his peace before comforting. JJ had opened up to you more in those two days than he had since he met you. You knew why. It was because you finally were a couple and he finally could be honest with someone. To JJ, it was the best feeling in the world. But, even as he spoke to you, he knew he was lying between his teeth.

The third day, you both had been at JJ's house. His dad had gone south for the weekend to gamble so you and JJ decided to get some fresh air and stay in his backyard for the day. There was only one lawn chair in his backyard but you both made it work. JJ sat down on it as you sat on his lap and cuddled onto him. For a couple of hours, you just laid there with him, talking at different times about everything. You felt so free now and you believed JJ felt the same. You knew it was because everything was out in the open. Everything had been said and anything that hadn't was still being developed. Even if it was just you and JJ laying on a chair, you still felt excited. You were with JJ and not scared anymore. You knew how he felt and it just felt so good to be wanted. It had felt like it had been a lifetime since you felt wanted.

When the sun finally set, you knew you had to say goodbye. Your parents were probably worried for you and JJ's dad would be back the next morning. The weekend was coming to an end and you were so upset. You and JJ had been in this bubble the entire weekend and you didn't want to break it. It was so hard to say goodbye. It took you and JJ ten minutes to say goodbye. You made plans to see each other tomorrow but it still felt like such a long time. You stood on JJ's front lawn for ten minutes, kissing and hugging each other until you were the first to pull away. You knew if you didn't get home soon, your parents would ground you.

"I gotta go." You whined as JJ kissed you again. 

He wasn't letting you go. "No."

You pried away from his grip. You didn't want to leave. Being with JJ always made you feel better, even more so now. "I gotta. I'll see you tomorrow."

Finally, JJ lets you leave. With one last kiss, you turn away from him and walk away. As you walk down JJ's block, there's an evident smile on your face. You probably look like a crazy woman to the neighbours but you could care less. It had been a long road, through so much confusion, but you finally were with JJ.

You thought back to the time when you first met JJ. You had promised him it was a one time thing and you knew it was a lie. It felt like years ago when you first met him when in reality, it had only been a couple of months. You pictured his face the first time you met him. He had the devilish smirk on his face and his pupils were dilated. You remembered how you felt, and it didn't compare to how you felt now. You had never felt this strong about someone in ages and it felt so good to be appreciated. You had known that night, whether you'd admit it or not, that JJ was going to change your life. You had texted Kie that night and told her -

Your phone. 

As you made your way onto the steps of your house, you remembered you forgot your phone at JJ's house. Dammit. You sighed and opened your front door, hoping your parents would let you go back quickly to get it.

Thankfully, your parents were sitting in your living room when you entered your house. They greeted you quietly but you told them you can't stay because they remembered you forgot your phone at Kie's house. You had told them you were at Kie's house and of course, they believed you. Your dad warned you to be quick and soon and you promised that you would. You were out the door and down your steps before your parents had time to warn you again. 

Although it was inconvenient to walk all the way back to JJ's house, you couldn't help but smile. Not only would it be a cute surprise but you also wanted to see JJ again. You had missed him already. 

You raced back to JJ's house and made it in ten minutes, cutting your travel time in half. You were desperate to see him again, even if it was only for five minutes. Your excitement died down once you saw JJ's house. 

The first thing you noticed that was out of place was that there was a BMW in JJ's driveway. JJ didn't have a car, let alone a BMW. That was something a Kook had. You looked at the license plate and it seemed familiar but you couldn't place it. As you passed the car, you slowed down. Something about this car made your body go cold, even on a hot summer night like this. Your gut was telling you something, but you didn't want to believe it. 

You somehow knew that you had to be quiet. As you made your way up the steps of JJ's house, you tiptoed towards the door. The closer you got, the more you realized that the door was slightly open, a glimmer of light from the house spilling into the darkness of night. You leaned forward, peeking through the slightly ajar door, hoping to get a glimpse of what was going on.

"Don't!" You heard JJ yell, his figure coming into the limited space you could see. He was yelling at someone that you couldn't see.

"Why? Because you know she'll hate you?" The voice made you gasp softly. You knew who it was. It was Rafe. It was Rafe's car that was in the driveway. Why was he here? And who were they talking about?

"Shut your fucking mouth!" JJ seethed, grabbing ahold of Rafe's collar and finally pulling him into your eyesight. 

Rafe pushed JJ off of him, shoving him into the wall. You wanted to scream but you knew if you did, you'd never find out what they were talking about. "If you don't tell her, I will."

JJ looked so defeated. You wanted to reach out to him. "Please don't. I love her."

You knew who they were talking about now. It was you. JJ had done something only Rafe knew about. It was something he knew you'd hate him for. What could he have done?

Rafe played with his keys in his hand. "I paid you to go out with her only for you to break her heart. So she'd come back to me. What was so fucking hard about that? Not my fault you love her. I want my money back."

Rafe paid him? No. You couldn't believe it. Wouldn't. Everything felt so real. JJ's feelings felt real. You knew it was too good to be true. Even before he approached you for the first time, you had a feeling he would never like you. When he showed interest, you were surprised. When he approached you the second time, you were even more surprised. It all made sense now. Why was JJ so reluctant to like you, why he pulled you away from Rafe when you were trying to talk to him at Kie's party. He was playing you. But it all felt so real.

You must've gasped really loud because JJ and Rafe heard you from inside. JJ had swung the door open, scared to see who was on the other side. He knew if it was you, it would be over for him. When he saw you, crying, he realized what he had done.

When you saw JJ reach out for you, you moved away. He disgusted you. How could he? How could Rafe? Granted, Rafe was an asshole but at least he wore it on his sleeve. JJ had tricked you. And you could never forgive him. You backed away from both JJ and Rafe, slowly moving down JJ's steps.

"Y/N..." JJ began, following you down the steps. Rafe just watched behind JJ, clearly enjoying the misery he caused.

"Get away from me." You seethed, tears rolling down your face so fast. God, you felt sick. You felt so nauseous. Everything was a lie. 

"I'm so sorry." JJ frowned, tears in his eyes. He seemed to shrink down as he walked towards you. The closer he walked though, the farther you walked. 

"You liar!" You screeched, your voice raspy. You could barely breathe. It hurt so much.

JJ shook his head, his arms out towards you. "No, no. I love you Y/N."

You shook your head, wrapping your hands around your body, hugging yourself. You closed your eyes for a moment and stopped walking. This couldn't be real. You didn't want it to be real.

You felt JJ come closer to you, finally wrapping his arms around you. You let him embrace you, even if you didn't hug him back. This was the last time he would touch you. The last time he'd hurt you. God, you had been so stupid.

The hug only lasted ten seconds because the second you collected yourself, you pushed him away. He looked so hurt, tears running down his face. You wanted to hug him, you still had feelings for him, but you knew you couldn't. He betrayed you. He lied to you. 

"You're a liar." You said coldly, finally turning around and running away. 

You ran and ran and ran. Away from JJ's house and away from Rafe. Away from everything that you once loved. You didn't even stop to catch your breath, your mind wouldn't let you. You believed that maybe if you ran far enough, you wouldn't be in so much pain. You wanted to run away from all your problems.

You made it to your house in record time. By the time you entered your home, your parents were gone. They left a note on your bed saying that they went out for the night and would be back by midnight. You didn't care. You used to care. You used to leave you but it seemed as if everyone was leaving you recently. 

You curled up into a ball on your bed and closed your eyes. Once your eyes were closed, you blocked the images of JJ that flooded your mind. You remembered you hadn't gotten your phone but you didn't care. You just wanted to sleep. You cried so much your chest was starting to hurt and you knew the only way for all of this to stop, was for you to rest your body and mind. It was easy for you to fall asleep. Your eyelids were already droopy from all the crying that it only took a couple of minutes for you to fall asleep. Once you did, you slept the entire night. You started to dream about JJ, but you stopped yourself. Your brain wasn't ready for that yet. You needed time.

And this is where you were now. You hadn't talked to JJ in two days. Kie had come by to drop your phone off and she tried to comfort you but you didn't speak. It was hard to comfort someone who didn't want to be comforted. You felt so empty. You felt stupid too. You had been so eager to trust JJ, even when Rafe had betrayed your trust already. But you were a good person. You guessed this was your punishment. 

When Kie couldn't comfort you, John B. had tried to come over. At first, you didn't want to let him in, but with some coaxing, you finally opened your door to him.

You wanted to ask how JJ was but you told yourself you shouldn't care anymore. He wasn't yours anymore. He never was.

John B., tired of the silence, was the first to speak. "JJ is a wreck."

This got your attention. You had hoped he was. So were you. You didn't say anything to John B. when he said this, just nodded solemnly. 

"I've never seen him like this. He's really sorry." John B. said, sitting down beside you.

You scowled. "Did you only come here to make me feel shitty? JJ lied to me. He betrayed me. I could care less if he was dying."

John B. didn't even react to what you were saying, almost as if he knew you were going to say that. "Yeah. I know. I wanted to come to see how you were doing, but I'd be lying if I said JJ didn't want me to come to see how you were doing."

You looked at John B., the scowl replaced with a frown. "If he wants to talk to me, he can come here himself." You didn't want him to, but you knew the only way to end this was to tell JJ yourself. 

John B. nodded. "When can he meet you then?"

You had decided with John B. that you were going to meet JJ at the beach, where you first met. You guessed it was only fitting. You had gotten ready a couple hours before you were set to meet with him. You wanted to look a bit presentable, only to show JJ that you looked better than he did. Even if it was not true, you wanted to appear like you moved on. You put on some makeup and changed into a new tank top with black shorts, praying to God that you looked a little better than you were. You wanted to appear as if you had healed, even if you hadn't. 

Waiting on the beach was absolute torture. You had been ten minutes early which was your fault entirely. You wanted to have some control over the situation, even though you knew you weren't in control. As you waited, you began to feel yourself start to cry. You couldn't believe how much everything changed. Only days ago you and JJ were together and happy, and now you could barely think about him without crying. Everything has gone so messed up. Although you desperately wanted to go back to the time where you two were still together, you knew that you couldn't do that. You had the truth now and as much as those old memories were good, you didn't want to forget the truth. You would come here with only one purpose. You needed to end things with JJ completely.

JJ was late by three minutes. You wanted to be upset but you know why he was late. You knew he wanted to prolong this conversation because he knew why you wanted to talk to him. You were here to end things for good and JJ didn't want that. By the time he finally arrived on the beach, he prepared himself. You were doing the same. 

Once he was close enough, you spoke first. "Hello." You were cold as you spoke, almost as if you were talking to a stranger.

JJ knew he deserved this kind of behaviour from you but it still hurt him deeply. With every ounce of being he had in him, he replied. "Hi." 

"I think you know why I want to talk to you." You said, the coldness in your voice still evident. You are afraid that if he even showed a small hint of emotion, you would break down and start crying all over again. 

JJ nodded, tears in his eyes. He knew how stupid he was. When Rafe had come up to him before the beach party, he had been planning to take this other girl named Lacey out but he had offered JJ $2,000 just to break some girl's heart. JJ did that shit for free and to get money for it oh, it seemed like a deal. He slept with you once and although he felt something, he ignored it. He got his money but Rafe was still unhappy because you hadn't reached out to him yet. So Rafe told JJ to hook up with you a second time but this time JJ didn't ask for any money. It felt wrong in JJ's eyes. He actually had a good time with you. You were a good person and it felt wrong. But he liked you enough to continue sleeping with you. Not for Rafe, before himself. After that night where you patch him up, he knew he couldn't deny his feelings for you anymore. He went back and forth in his mind, debating whether he should pursue things with you or not. You had made it clear many times that you felt something for him and although he felt something for you, there was a little voice in his head telling him that what he was doing screwed up because he hadn't liked you at first. There were so many times where he wanted to tell you but he didn't want to ruin anything because for the first time he actually ever felt happy with someone. Then he ruined everything. And now you never want to speak to him again.

JJ wanted to explain everything to you in detail and try to make you understand the situation that he was put in. There was no point though. He still had done a screwed-up thing to you and he didn't deserve you. 

"After tonight, I never want to talk to you again." You said plainly, crossing your arms over your chest. The sun was setting soon and you knew you should be getting home. But you needed one more thing from JJ. "Why'd you do it?"

JJ had been looking at his feet the entire time but when you said this he finally made eye contact with you. "Do what?"

You let a tear slide down your cheek and you watched as JJ frowned even more. "Why did you just break my heart like Rafe wanted? Why did you string me along?"

JJ sighed, looking at the ocean before getting the courage to look at you. He had hurt you beyond repair. He knew that there was nothing he could say, nothing he could do, to get you to forgive him. So he didn't sugar coat it. He just told you the truth.

"I could care less about you at first. I had seen you hanging out with Kie so many times before that first party and I thought you were cute but you were Kie's friend. Then race told me his plan and said he'd give me $2,000 if I could break your heart. I never cared about anyone. I was selfish. So at first, I did it. And it was easy. But you are so easy to love Y/N. You're kind and gentle. You didn't ask many questions when I came over to your house that night covered in cuts and bruises. You never pushed me to talk about my feelings because you knew that was not something that I was comfortable with. No one has done that. And I realized what I had been missing. But Rafe realized that you didn't love him anymore. He tried to get me to do it again and even offered more money but something told me not to do it." JJ took a moment to breathe, looking at the tears sliding down your face. He wondered what you were thinking. "It's so easy to be with you. I'm not easy to be around. I'm selfish and I'm cruel. I'm reckless. But you love me so much that you were patient. I know I should have told you. But it was so easy to be with you, that I didn't think I would be able to live without you. I'm sorry."

You didn't know how to react. This was the most JJ had ever expressed his feelings towards you. You'd be lying if you said you weren't surprised. You didn't know if it was enough though. You wondered if anything he did would be enough. 

When you didn't respond to him, JJ knew. It wasn't enough. He loved you and he said all those nice things, but it wasn't enough. He was a liar and he betrayed you too deeply for you to forgive him. He understood. He didn't blame you. He didn't say anything else. He doubted you wanted to hear his voice ever again. He made no sound as he turned away from you and left. As he walked to the boardwalk and passed the beach, he couldn't help but cry. Although he had cried before, this time he knew it was the end. It wasn't enough. 

You didn't know why JJ left. You are still trying to take in all those things that he said and by the time that you did, you realized that he was gone. You scanned the beach in the boardwalk and finally found him a hundred yards away. He didn't want to forgive him. You had come here tonight to make him hurt. You had come to end things completely. You had told yourself that no matter how much he pleaded, you were still going to walk away. But as much as you didn't want to admit it, you knew JJ and you knew when he was lying and when he wasn't. He wasn't lying now you knew he wasn't lying when you guys were together. He had screwed up. He had started a relationship with you for the wrong reasons. But he loved you. He loves you so much that he was willing to walk away if that made you happy. But you realized it didn't make you happy. And you wondered why you wanted to walk away in the first place. JJ had done all that terrible stuff before he knew you. And although it would take so much time for you to completely heal, you need JJ. So you ran after him.

"JJ!" You screamed, running closer and closer towards the boy you loved.

JJ stopped dead in his tracks. He thought his brain was playing tricks on him. But when you called for him the second time, he knew it was true. You had chased after him. You still wanted him. What had he done to deserve that? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

When he turned around, he saw you run to him. His tears instantly stopped and a huge smile fell over his lips. You had still loved him. You had run such a long way and JJ felt bad so he ran to you, trying to close to distance faster. Once you were close enough to touch, JJ reached out for you. When you reached out for him, he grabbed ahold of you, pulling you into a big hug. You both stood there for a moment, trying to catch your breath as you hugged. JJ was smiling so wide. 

Once you caught your breath, you let go of JJ. You looked at him, his hands coming up cup your cheeks. He was smiling so wide and you felt yourself smiling too.

"You're easy to love too." 

JJ didn't say anything, just pulled you close for a kiss. When your lips touched, you felt whole again. It would take some time but you needed JJ. And he needed you.

"I love you." JJ said, smiling wide. 

You nodded, pulling him close. "I love you."

And you both weren't lying.

~

taglist: @jjmaybanxx @teamnick

[marybethsjournal]

Always

Summary: Molly has hit a wall with Dutch and doesn’t know what to do; she feels completely lost. Not to mention that she has started to have complicated feeling towards another gang member.

Pairing(s): Dutch Van Der Linde x Molly O’Shea, Molly O’Shea x Sadie Adler (strongly implied)

Word Count: 1903

A03 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29265912

It was barely noon and the girls were day drinking yet again. This didn’t impress Molly much, but she had come to realize that nobody, not even Dutch cared about what she thought. Molly pushed the thought away. If she thought about how Dutch had been shutting her out and treating her badly in general, she would be driven to drink just like these harlots. And then she would be no better than them, which seemed to be the most humiliating thought possible at the time.

Molly was not surprised that Karen was leading the drinking charge of the day. That’s all the wench knew how to do, that and seduce men. She tried not to blame Karen too hard for that, though, because everyone knew Dutch was strongly encouraging her to put herself out there and if Molly verbalized her bias against working women, she’d have to implicate Dutch in the whole thing and she didn’t feel like doing that. Anything to exonerate her man from wrongdoing. What did surprise Molly was that that girl, Sadie, had joined the women for once. And not in the way Abigail had, coming over to get one drink and then gone back to her business (Molly didn’t blame her, she deserved a drink, especially since Jack had asked about 50 questions today already and the Marston man had tried to pants Bill and got a fist in his face in return). Sadie was downing the drinks faster than anyone else; she seemed to have no shame. Molly supposed that maybe she shouldn’t have been so surprised. Sadie had gone through a significant transformation over the past few months. When Sadie had been brought in by Dutch, Micah, and Arthur, she seemed weak and quiet. She had worn dresses and otherwise modest garments, although nothing too fancy. Now, she had the audacity to yell at the men and one day, when out on the town with Arthur, she had bought a shirt and pants and she hadn’t taken them off since. Quite offensive, in Molly’s opinion, but Sadie objectively pulled it off quite well. Molly had noticed herself staring at Sadie quite often, observing the woman. She couldn’t pinpoint quite why, but she assumed it was normal. Sadie was pushing boundaries and was overall quite an interesting woman, more interesting than herself. Not to mention, Sadie was very beautiful. Anyone could see that, it wasn’t an odd thing for her to think.

Molly found herself in the same situation yet again. She was staring at Sadie, who was downing another drink and laughing at some joke Tilly (or maybe it was Karen??? Molly wasn’t doing a very good job focusing on anything other than Sadie at the moment) made. Molly smiled, seeing Sadie throw her head back in laughter. Her smile was so huge and genuine. It was only recently that she had started smiling again. Sadie had taken it rough, just like any woman would, when her husband died. Molly knew the pain hadn’t gone away, but Sadie seemed to finally be letting herself enjoy life with little guilt. She thought about Sadie’s smile a little longer than she probably should have and her mind ended up drifting to a few nights ago when she and Sadie had danced. The whole camp was ambient with laughter and music, coming both from the gramophone and Javier’s guitar. Everyone seemed to have found a partner and was dancing: Mary Beth with Arthur, Jack with Uncle (their form of dancing was far different than everyone else’s slow dancing, the pair were waving their arms wildly and running in circles together), Karen with Sean, Tilly with Lenny. Hell, even Abigail and that fool John had put aside their differences for the night and were dancing up on each other, a bit too provocatively for Molly’s liking. Molly had actually been really excited about the spontaneous party that night. She felt the distance growing between her and Dutch the past few weeks and she was convinced that that night could make it all better. She had put on her finest dress, fixed her hair, and perfected before asking him. But to her surprise, he told her that he was too tired and maybe they could try another time. Her surprise had turned to horror when she later saw Dutch dancing with Susan. The worst part was, Dutch didn’t even seem to care when Molly noticed. It was like he didn’t even care about her feelings.

Molly had run into the nearby forest to cry. She knew her makeup would smudge and usually she would refrain from crying to the best of her ability, but she didn’t care anymore. It only took a few minutes before Sadie had snuck up behind her and asked her what was wrong. She had been sitting on a rock nearby, not in a party mood, when she had heard Molly crying, she explained. How embarrassing.

“So, are you going to tell me what happened so I can fight a bitch?” 

Molly, despite her sadness, laughed. “It’s not really a bitch. It’s Dutch. Wouldn’t dance with me but he sure is dancing with Susan right now.”

“That old fart? Ah you can do better than him.” Sadie seemed to get an idea and clapped her hands together. “In fact, let’s show him what he’s missing. I’ll dance with ya.”

Molly was taken aback by Sadie’s proposal. 

“I’m not too sure that’ll make him jealous. Maybe if I danced with Charles or something…”

“Oh come on! Sorry I’m not Charles.” Sadie grabbed Molly’s hand and drug her back into camp

Molly was confused as to why Sadie seemed so insistent to dance with her, but she was certainly pleased by the attention. She rarely got attention from this gang.

The dance went wonderfully; Molly almost felt something resembling butterflies in her stomach, which she dismissed as simple indigestion. It was perfect until Molly apparently got too close to Sadie and she asked, “Miss O’Shea, do you expect me to kiss you or what?”

Molly was horrified. She gave some phony excuse and ran away from the situation as fast as she could, ignoring Sadie calling after her. Things had been pretty awkward between them since then.

Molly was startled out her daydreaming when Karen yelled at her, “Hey Molly, what are you looking at? You wanna drink or something?” Oh great, Molly thought after realizing she had been staring this entire time.

Molly walked over to where Karen was and for just a brief moment, allowed herself to look at Sadie again. Unfortunately, Sadie seemed to have the same idea. Their eyes locked and Sadie subsequently excused herself to go talk to Abigail. 

“What the Hell is her problem? Anyway, wanna drink? I’ll share mine. It’s the good kind of whiskey.” Karen offered some strong whiskey to Molly. There’s nothing Molly wanted less than to drink after Karen.

“I try not to drink outside of social settings.” Molly informed Karen, politely declining.

“Then WHY were you looking at me earlier?”

“I wasn’t.” Molly responded curtly.

“Then you were looking at Sadie. Cause I know you weren’t looking at these here two fools.” Karen made rude gestures at Mary Beth and Tilly. 

“I wasn’t looking at anything, Karen. Just thinking.” Molly couldn’t find it within herself to look anywhere besides her feet.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to offend you. You two, get out of here. I need to talk to Miss O’Shea alone.” Molly tried desperately to get the other two girls to stay but Karen insisted they leave. Apparently, Karen had much more pull among the other women than Molly did. That wasn’t one bit surprising, but it still seemed wrong.

“Wow, you really don’t wanna talk to me. My feelings are so hurt.” Karen took another swig of her drink before continuing. “Listen Molly, you know just as well as everyone else that I think you’re lazy and entitled. Just all around a nasty person.”

Molly nodded. Karen generally was straightforward and rude when she wanted to me, but it still seemed the drink must be doing a number on her for her to be able to say what she just had said.

“But for some reason my the dumb bitch in me has started to care. I didn’t think I had an angel on my shoulder, but here she is, annoying as ever, telling me, ‘Karen, you have to warn Molly. You don’t wanna see her get hurt.’ And then I tell them back that I don’t care if you get hurt but I still feel like I do care afterwards.”

It didn’t take much of an intellectual to make the observation that Karen had had too much to drink. Molly honestly couldn’t understand what she was saying: it sounded like a whole bunch of incoherent rambling in which she said a whole bunch, yet nothing at all at the same time.

“I’m not sure I follow.”

“Of course you wouldn’t. You don’t have a heart of gold like myself. But at least you do have a heart. Listen, I just wanted to let you know Dutch don't care about you.”

‘“Leave me alone, Karen. You’re drunk and I won’t hear anymore.”

“See, you know it’s true! He sees you as a toy more than anything. You’re gonna end up hurt and he’s not going to care one bit.”

“If you think he’s so bad, why are you still running with him?”

“A lot of us don’t have a choice, miss society lady. Besides, I know better to get involved with him.”

“Sure, Karen. Thanks, I guess.”

Molly had walked away and pretended like she hadn’t cared but even days later, the short conversation haunted her at every turn. Even late at night, lying in bed next to Dutch, she replayed the whole ordeal over and over again in her mind. She hated to admit it, but Karen was right. The man lying next to her didn’t feel much for her anymore, if he ever had in the first place. It was just cold lying next to him. Like sleeping with a complete stranger.

She had spent several consecutive nights not being able to sleep out of worry. Late into the night, she would search Dutch’s face for any sort of sign that maybe he cared about something, maybe not even her. She always came up with nothing.

It had become all too much for Molly. She found herself crying yet again. She had never known herself to be this emotional. Part of her wanted Dutch to wake up and see her in pain, but she knew in her heart that he wouldn’t care. He would just be irritated that someone interrupted his beauty sleep.

One night when Molly couldn’t control her crying any longer, she left their tent so as not to disturb Dutch. She walked towards the rock that she usually sat on while she read a book during the day. On her way, she noticed that Sadie was sitting on another rock on the other side of camp. What was she doing out this late. She supposed she would have to find out. Now was her chance to finally talk to Sadie and apologize for whatever had happened between them.

“Can I sit here with you?” Molly asked Sadie when she approached her.

“Always.” Sadie smiled at her.

“That would be nice.”

[in-this-light-on-this-evening]

I hope this isn't too personal, but can I ask u how did ir start with F? how did you two meet, or what's special about him...I love hearing people talk about the ones they're over the moon with. anyway, I'm rooting for you girl <3

Hiii! 🖤 We met at work! We've both started working for the company almost at the same time.

Initially he was super awkward, didn't talk that much but day after day we kept going for a cigarette at the same hour and slowly we've started socializing a bit more.

I don't even remember when or what exactly triggered my brain into realising that "well, that's the one"... Tbh I fully realised this just recently but one thing is sure: everytime we share moments together, for me it's the best thing ever. I really wish I could put it into words but I can't find the right ones to fully describe it all. The best one I think is: he feels like home.

Like, literally. I've never felt judged, fooled, he's never made me angry or brought to the point of me willing to stop being friends together... He's one of the very few people, if not The One that I wouldn't mind having around all the time. Seriously. With the others I usually have to step back, take some Me Time and deflate in solitude. Him? Never felt that.

Anyway, he obviously has some flaws as every human should 'cause nobody is perfect but some of the things that I absolutely love about him is that he's super smart, always eager to learn new things (in fact he likes documentaries a lot) and always willing to share some facts about them. Side note: I'm pretty dumb and all the things I've learned are fucking gone with the wind, I don't remember anything, so it's nice having someone that tells you fun facts about different topics, ya kno?

Also he loves animals, dogs in particular. I've never seen anybody that would be as excited to see a dog on the streets as I do. We literally stop talking about whatever we're talking about and go batshit crazy "DOGGOOOOO?! LOOK AT THAT OMG DOGGO LOOK LOOK". Fucking embarrassing but we don't care 😂

And I love the fact that he makes me laugh even in those moments when anyone wouldn't even smile. It takes literally two seconds to make me feel better and face my problems more lightly. Nobody was ever able to do that, so I guess that's pretty special!

Finally I guess it's the matter of energy/vibes/whatever that people have. Idk what I could compare it to but the only analogy that pops in my mind is... sunshine. That kind of sunshine during the first days of spring that makes you feel all warm and happy after months of cold winter and rain.

The rest? I literally don't know, I feel this thing inside my heart, totally undescribable that you'd have to experience yourself to get what I mean. Something similar happened to me only once in the past and it took me literally 5 years to snap out of it (for various reasons). 5 YEARS. I don't wanna know how much time it's gonna take me this time 😅

[goosewhisker]

this crooked posture (is all you’ve ever known)

read this on ao3 || read this on fanfiction.net

i wrote this whole thing in a span of about 5 days :pensive: as u can maybe tell i have a lot of feelings abt that one conversation btwn scourge and jules...there is so much potential here and im sad we never got to see it

as far as timeline goes- this would probably take place in the pre-boot universe about six months or so after scourge & co escape from zone jail. the destructix are camping out on mobius for the time being to avoid drawing zonic's attention and knothole has wrapped up the ixis naugus/metal sally arcs.

Summary: Fiona heads off with a wave, and he's left where he started - staring through a window into a nearly-empty kitchen, looking in on a life was never his and never will be. Inside, the robian sets bacon on the stovetop to fry and starts making toast, blissfully unaware of the hedgehog just outside. It's hard to tell on a robot, obviously, but he looks perfectly content with his life. Happy, even.

Pathetic. 

Or: Scourge avoids his problems, Fiona is exasperated, and Jules is mostly oblivious.

It's the early hours of the morning. So early, in fact, that it shouldn't even technically be called morning because it's still basically nighttime and no one sane is up right now.

Which is probably why the idiotic robian is up at five o'clock in the morning, puttering around in the kitchen and making breakfast. There's literally no reason for it. It's not like he can eat anything, after all, and his stupid son lives off chilidogs, so he's not going to eat it. And his stupid wife isn't getting up for like two hours, so she's not eating it either. See? Idiocy.

Yet another thing that their universes seem to have in common.

"What are you doing?"

Scourge almost shrieks - key word is almost, 'cause he's too cool to scream like a dork - and tackles Fiona into the bushes. "Shhh!"

Fiona splutters indignantly and a second later her fist bounces off his jaw, which, ow. "Are you nuts? Get off me!"

"Shhhut up!" Scourge throws a quick glance over his shoulder at the window. No one's come outside to investigate, so hopefully no one's heard. He rolls off her a second later. "You wanna get us arrested, woman?"

"Hey, I'm a legal citizen of this universe!" Fiona protests. "If anything, it's you who's getting arrested, Mr.-Snooping-Through-Other-People's-Windows. That's so creepy."

"We're both wanted criminals here; if we get caught, we're going down together," Scourge points out, graciously ignoring her last comment. "And anyway, I'm... gathering intel."

Fiona snorts. "Pull the other one, Scourge. That's not gonna work on me." Crossing her arms, she adds, "You've been gathering intel every night for the past week. And I know you're technically the same person, but watching Sonic sleep is really weird."

"I'm not watching him," Scourge snaps before he can help himself.

"Oh?" Fiona's eyes glint and it's then that Scourge realizes he's slipped. "Then who are you watching?"

"Uhhh..." Scourge fidgets while trying not to look like he's fidgeting. "No one. I'm just passing through, not watching anything. Why'd I want to do that anyway?" He forces a laugh. "So lame."

Fiona regards him with a flat stare. "Your fingerprints are smudged all over the window."

"What?" Scourge whips around to check the window. He'd been so careful not to leave any traces of his visits, but-

Waitaminute.

"Very funny," Scourge growls into his gloved hands. Fiona snickers.

"Look, if you don't want to tell me, I won't make you," she says, standing up and brushing the dirt off her pants. "But I'll find out eventually. And if this new obsession of yours endangers yourself or the team, I'm going to put a stop to it."

"Yeah, yeah," Scourge mutters, waving her off. "Get lost."

"Mhm. We still on for that movie night?"

"'course. See you there, babe."

Fiona heads off with a wave, and he's left where he started - staring through a window into a nearly-empty kitchen, looking in on a life was never his and never will be. Inside, the robian sets bacon on the stovetop to fry and starts making toast, blissfully unaware of the hedgehog just outside. It's hard to tell on a robot, obviously, but he looks perfectly content with his life. Happy, even.

Pathetic.

Scourge kicks the side of the house, suddenly incandescently furious with everything. Inside, Jules looks up in surprise, but Scourge is already gone.

"I need to stop," Scourge says later. The movie is over - some samurai flick that Simian had picked out and Lightning had ruined with his constant nitpicking - and they'd gone out for ice cream afterwards (read: robbed that nice gelato place downtown). Getting used to having teammates again is... something, Scourge supposes. But it's not completely terrible.

"You need to stop," Fiona agrees. She's texting furiously, slouched into the ratty couch in their current hideout with Scourge's head on her lap.

"It's just weird seeing him alive, is all," Scourge tells the ceiling. "That's all it is. Like, when you see something weird, and you just gotta look at it. It doesn't mean anything."

"Are you trying to convince yourself or me?"

"Not tryin' to convince anyone. I'm just saying what it is."

Fiona sets down her phone with a sigh. "Look, you gotta stop hurting yourself like this."

Scourge sits up a little too fast. "Hurting myself? What? Babe, have you forgotten who you're talking to? I'm Scourge the Hedgehog, I don't hurt."

Fiona gives that all the acknowledgment it deserves, which is none. "I told you about the... the prison, when I was a kid," she says. Scourge falls silent. "I went back there a few times, after I was big enough to handle myself. There wasn't a reason, really. I just thought I had to see it. And it sort of helped the first time - I cleaned out all the bots and made sure that place couldn't hold anyone ever again - but after that, I just went back again and again because it made me hurt and that felt good. Because I was hurting anyway, and being able to make it worse when I wanted to made me feel like I could control it."

Scourge doesn't say anything.

"But that wasn't true," Fiona says. Her voice shakes just a little, and without thinking Scourge takes her hand. It's stupid (sentimental) but she smiles faintly. "I wasn't healing or in control or anything. I was just hurting myself. And I can't stand watching you do the same."

"Babe," Scourge begins hoarsely.

"Tell me it's not the same," Fiona says flatly. "Or tell me- tell me that if I went back to that prison and crawl through that tunnel I dug with my own hands and relive every moment of the hell I went through, that you wouldn't stop me. That you would watch me do it."

He can't tell her that. He can't tell her that and she knows it.

Scourge looks away.

Fiona sighs and runs her hand along his spines. "He's not your dad, Scourge," she says quietly. "He's an entirely different person. Hurting yourself isn't going to make anything better."

"Okay," Scourge agrees. "Okay." Then, after a moment, "Thanks, babe."

Fiona smiles again, and there's something so sad about it he squeezes her hand again (uncool, but it's not like there's anyone else to see it). "No problem, hun."

He goes back again the next day.

This time, the wife is there too.

Scourge crouches in the massive oak tree beside the window, pretending he doesn't feel like a massive creep. His green fur blends neatly with the leaves, rendering him all but invisible to any casual observers, particularly when it's not-quite-light. With luck, it'll fool robian eyes as well.

Anyway.

Scourge doesn't remember his mother. She was simply never in the picture; whether because of death or divorce he never knew. Generally, he suspects the latter - months upon months of neglect, of being constantly passed over and ignored for the more important burdens of the state and the good of the people - yeah, he can see how a divorce would happen. Not that he'll ever know now.

The hedgehog in the kitchen doesn't look neglected. She throws her arms around the robian, not seeming to mind the cold metal, and dances around him as they prepare breakfast. The robian, in turn, leans into her touches and takes advantage of a moment of distraction to dab pancake batter on her nose. It's disgusting. Scourge gags.

Part of him wonders what he's gaining out of this. Hiding in a tree, spying on some losers and their dumb domestic life - not exactly fitting behavior for the former king of Moebius, after all.

It's not... It's not that Fiona's right. It's not like he's hurting himself - like he told Fiona, he's Scourge the Hedgehog. He doesn't do that emotions garbage. That kind of wimpiness is more Sonic's thing.

(Let alone that Fiona had said it happened to her. Let alone that she's usually right, and that she's one of the strongest people he knows.)

He's just curious. That's all. Nothing more, nothing less.

(The voice in his head sounding suspiciously like Fiona whispers, Yeah, right.)

Inside the kitchen, the robian starts flipping pancakes. For a second, Scourge tries to imagine his own father like that: Jules the Hedgehog, king of Moebius, flipping pancakes in a frilly pink apron and laughing with his wife. Arguing over who gets to wake up their son. Talking and hugging and laughing and living -

- and the illusion dissipates. Jules wouldn't set foot in a kitchen. He had servants to do that kind of thing, just like he had servants to take care of his son.

Scourge drops down from the tree branch and lands lightly on his feet. He's done here. He slinks off into the streets, hiding his face from the strengthening sunlight as synthetic laughter rings out behind him.

"Hey, Simian," Scourge says a few days later.

Simian continues lifting weights without slowing. "Yes?"

Scourge likes Simian, as much as he likes anyone. The ape is steady and has a solid head on his shoulders, and while it's kind of a drag most times, he does occasionally have helpful bits of advice. And when he goes loose on the battlefield, he can be really fun to fight alongside.

So that, plus the fact that Hawk doesn't care and Lightning would probably make fun of him and he'd rather eat his own shoes than talk to Fly, makes him Scourge's best option.

Scourge swings his legs back and forth as they dangle off the chair and tries to think of a way to broach it. He just needs to be subtle, right? "When was the last time you saw your parents?"

And maybe that wasn't super subtle after all, because Simian stops in the middle of his workout session (he never stops in the middle of a workout session) to stare at him. It feels... extremely uncomfortable, actually, wow. Scourge hops up and starts his stretches (anything to avoid looking back).

"When I last left my village, I was eighteen," Simian says at last. He sounds thoughtful, which is never a good sign. "That was several years ago... six years, I believe."

"That long, huh?" Scourge moves to quad stretches. "You're pretty old, man. Slowing down anytime soon?"

He's rewarded with a sharp grin. "I'm not that old. Though I suppose most people look slow next to you."

"Damn straight!"

"Why do you ask?"

And that's the issue - when even Scourge isn't sure why he's asking. He takes his time answering. "Oh, you know... just curious. Ever think about 'em?"

There's another ponderous silence, which mostly just succeeds in making Scourge antsy. Well, antsier.

"Sometimes," Simian says. "But I am a dedicated member of this team. You can rest assured of that."

And that's nice, but it's not what he's asking-

"...but that's not what you're asking, is it?"

Scourge freezes. Is he just that transparent? Why can everyone suddenly read his mind now? "What're you on about, man?" he deflects.

Simian shakes his head. "I do miss them, sometimes. It is natural for children to miss their parents."

"Not me!" Scourge laughs, and if it comes out a little too sharp, well, who's to blame him?

"Of course," Simian says, sounding vaguely indulgent. "Does that satisfy your curiosity?"

"Uh, sure," Scourge lies. "A little heavy on the oversharing, but it's cool." And then he scarpers, because if super speed's good for anything it's for escaping uncomfortable conversations. Simian doesn't say anything about it later, and thank Chaos because he doesn't think he'd be able to face Fiona if she ever got wind of that little talk.

The next time he's in town, Scourge picks up a new set of woodworking knives and leaves it on Simian's equipment. It's not like he's gone soft, buying presents for his friends or whatever, Scourge tells himself. He's just... buying Simian's silence. It's a bribe, is all.

(Simian saves him some extra ice cream the night after and that's that.)

It is natural for children to miss their parents, Simian had said. Ha! As if. Scourge hasn't missed his old man a day of his life and he's not about to start now.

... that'd carry more weight if he wasn't spending two or three mornings a week moping outside their kitchen.

Scourge sips his frappe and pretends he's not sulking. Right now, he's outside some random diner in Knothole in full disguise, complete with a trenchcoat, fedora, and sunglasses. He was honestly expecting someone to stop him before now - this kind of garb is about as suspicious as it gets - but no one seemed to even notice anything out of the ordinary. Idiots.

Fiona would kill him if she knew the kind of risks he's taking - which, of course, is why she doesn't need to know.

Scourge checks the time. Seven o'clock, meaning the wife is just getting up and they're having breakfast right now - Chaos, he has their entire morning schedule memorized, doesn't he? Fiona was right, he is obsessed. Scourge slumps over the table and buries his head in his arms.

He can still turn this around. Knowing their schedule is useful, from a strategic standpoint; he could threaten them, take them hostage... even kill them. Sonic would be taken completely offguard. It would be simple. Easy. The smart thing to do.

Scourge's groan is only partially muffled by the table.

"...you alright, son?"

What-

Something electric shoots up his spine. Scourge's claws dig into the edges of the table with a crunch as he bolts upright. And there, before him, with a look so familiar but so foreign in his eyes is-

He's not the same.

His skin is metallic where it should be flesh, plated where it should be furred. His eyes burn a bright pixelated red when they should be brown. That stupid tuft of fur on his head is shining chrome that glints under the bright sun.

But the way he stands - colored though it is with a hint of a soldier's posture - that proud tilt of his chin, the gentleness in his hands as they reach out to him -

It's Jules.

It's different from seeing him in that dim, lamp-lit room. In the daylight, the differences are exaggerated - and so are the similarities.

For a second, Scourge can only see his dad standing there.

He reacts on instinct. Scourge rears back and smacks Jules' outstretched hand away. "Don't touch me!"

Jules straightens up, virtual eyes widening with shock. "I'm- I'm sorry, it looked like you were unhappy. I only meant to-"

"Well, don't," Scourge spits. "Get lost."

Jules looks at him longer and then, for some Chaos-forsaken reason, doesn't leave. Why isn't he leaving, Scourge thinks furiously, and only realizes he's breathing heavy when his breaths start coming too fast and harsh in his ears. Jules says something, but the words don't make sense and he can't tear his gaze away from the polished metal. Beneath his fingertips, the table starts to splinter.

And then there's warm hands on his shoulders, and a steady voice in his ears, saying, "Listen to me. Do you want me to leave?"

Nothing comes out of his throat. Scourge shakes helplessly. He wants him to leave, he wants him stay, he wants to never see him again. He wants his dad.

Jules must take it as permission to stay, because he doesn't leave. The grip on his shoulders is a solid, unmoving presence, and Scourge can't help but lean into it. "I'm going to count slowly. Try to match your breathing to my voice - it's alright if you can't. Starting now. One, two..."

For some completely batty reason, he tries, and it helps some. His breathing is a little too fast and a lot shaky, still, but it settles into a more even pace instead of the uncontrollable rush. Sense comes back slowly, and with it, an acute, uncomfortable awareness of what just happened.

Well. At least he's not crying.

Scourge stands abruptly, tearing himself from Jules' arms. The robian raises a brow but doesn't protest. "Are you feeling better?" he asks instead. It's entirely casual, with no hint of pity, and Scourge hates himself a little for being pathetically grateful.

"Peachy," Scourge snaps and whirls around, hiking up his collar. Jules isn't screaming yet, so he clearly hasn't realized who he is, and Scourge is in no hurry to correct him. Honestly, this hedgehog's stupidity knows no bounds.

"Well." The robian stands up, reaches for a grocery bag that Scourge only just realized was there, and adds, "Stay safe, son."

Scourge's vision briefly whites out from fury. "Don't call me that," he snarls and takes off running before Jules can reply.

He finds a secluded place in a lonely corner, throws his warp ring, and promises himself that he'll never go back.

Scourge does some research.

It's called a panic attack, apparently. Common among soldiers, which is probably why Jules knew what to do - he said he'd been on the front lines, hadn't he? Common among victims of PTSD, the website says, and Scourge scoffs and closes the tab. Trauma - ridiculous. Scourge doesn't do trauma. If anything, he gives it to other people.

He's still snickering at his joke when Hawk comes in to tell him that Finitevus called in with another job. Normally, Scourge would tell him to screw off, but he's offering a massive stack of Anarchy beryl in return - something they've been in short supply of since they ditched Moebius.

Scourge's body itches at the thought of going super again. He accepts.

Thirty minutes later, they're waist-deep in smashed Eggman bots and struggling to fend off a fresh wave while Fiona and Hawk bicker over the terminal.

"I'm telling you, if we do that, we'll get locked out of the system entirely!" Fiona snaps.

Hawk throws up his hands. "Fine! Ignore me! It's not like you literally just have to enter the code or anything!"

Scourge spindashes down the line of Eggpawns, smashing through them like paper. He hits the wall at the right angle to bounce right off and uncurls in midair to land on his feet.

"Wrap it up, guys!" he yells and ducks beneath a stray kunai. "Watch it, Lightning!"

"Thought you were supposed to be the fast one," Lightning calls back.

"And I thought you were supposed to be able to aim!"

"I can." Lightning flicks a wrist and Scourge drops backward into a roll to avoid the next kunai that comes his way. When he springs back onto his feet, ready to chew out the idiotic trigger-happy lynx, there's a Badnik pinned to the wall right where he'd been standing. Lightning shoots him a smug grin.

"Right back atcha," Scourge mutters and barrels through the cluster taking potshots at Hawk and Fi.

"Ugh, fine!" Fiona shoves Hawk away and starts typing furiously.

Scourge drops another five Badniks and skids to a stop as an Egg Launcher smashes through the wall directly in front of him. "Fiona!"

"Give us a minute," Hawk snarls back.

The Launcher brings its arms down to eye level and Scourge leaps into the air as its targeting system locks on - and then Fly drops out of nowhere onto on its shoulders. "Need help?" the frog giggles (sweet Chaos Scourge hates him) and rips the thing's head off. Scourge blitzes right through its chest.

As its body slumps bonelessly to the floor, another Launcher steps through the wall behind it... and another one. And another. Chaos.

"If those things unload all those missiles in here, we're going to have a problem," Lightning says, echoing Scourge's own thoughts.

"Out of the way," Simian grunts, swinging the first bot's disembodied missile launcher-slash-arm onto his shoulder and taking aim.

"Are you nuts, man?" Scourge yells. "Didn't you hear Lightning? You fire that thing and this whole building's going down!"

"Better have the exit ready, then," Simian returns evenly.

"Got it!" Fiona announces, jumping up from the terminal with a chip in hand. Hawk follows, looking severely disgruntled. "Turns out we really did just have to enter the code. Hah."

"I told you," Hawk begins, but Fiona waves him off.

"You were right once, don't go getting a big head. You got the ring ready, sweetie?"

"Everyone over here! You miss the ring, we're leavin' you behind!" Scourge doesn't wait for a response and throws the warp ring. The portal spins into existence, glistening faintly in the electric light, and they all pile in. Simian fires off a final missile salvo before the ring vanishes and they tumble haphazardly into the Doc's lair to the sound of the entire base going up.

For a second, no one moves, too tired and bruised and tangled together to bother getting up. Lightning sighs heavily from the bottom of the heap. Scourge laughs.

"I trust you have what I asked for?" Finitevus asks from literally two feet away, and Scourge isn't even going to question how he knew where they'd end up. After all, they are at his mercy inside his weird evil lair, and Scourge knows how to be tactful.

Scourge props himself up on an elbow. "So do you like, practice being creepy, or is it natural?"

Without looking, Fiona smacks him in the back of the head.

"Ow!"

"We have it," Fiona says, extricating herself from the tangle. Scourge considers tripping her as she walks past, decides against it, and settles for hooking his ankle around Hawk's heel as he stands up. The bird goes down with a satisfying squawk right on top of Lightning and the ensuing chaos lets Scourge hop up onto his own feet.

Fiona ignores it.

"All the files relating to the roboticization process are on this USB," she says, holding it out. Finitevus takes it and, after a moment's inspection, slips it into his robes.

"So why'd you want that, Doc?" Scourge asks, adjusting his sunglasses. "Woulda thought that robot stuff wasn't quite your style."

"It is true that roboticization is a perversion of the natural order and representative of that which I seek to destroy," Finitevus concedes. "But I am not opposed to much that will give me the advantage against my nemeses. And I must admit the idea of enslaving your opponent's will to your own has a certain... charm."

Scourge and Fiona exchange a look - of the literally why is he like this and the why do we talk to him again variety - and Scourge shoves his hands in his pockets and steps up. "Uh... yeah, man. Totally. Anyway, if we're done here, can we have the beryl now?"

"Of course. But first, I have one more task for you."

Scourge scoffs disbelievingly. "Are you kidding? The deal was we break into Eggman's lab, steal your stupid information, and hand it over. We've done that. It took like forever and it was a massive pain in the butt the whole time, we are not adding anything else onto that and that's final."

"...I'll double the amount of beryl."

Scourge hesitates.

... which is how they ended up here. Scourge crouches on the windy rooftop, tugging his dumb fancy suit jacket closer and hoping idly that something happens soon. "Can we go in yet?" he asks.

Hawk, who's busy adjusting his own disguise, shakes his head. "You really have no patience at all, do you?"

"Nope!" Scourge tugs on his overly-tight tie and mostly just makes it worse. "How 'bout now?"

"If you were any good at infiltration, Fiona would've let you go in already," Hawk says. He's typing on his communicator, syncing all their devices into something they can actually use. It's not that Hawk's particularly adept at technology, or anything; it's just that all the rest of them are so abysmal at anything electric that tech duty usually falls to him or Fiona. "Unless Plan C falls through, you're not headed in 'till the last minute."

Scourge sighs loudly, letting his feet dangle off the edge of the building. "I could just walk in and grab him. They wouldn't even see me coming. Then we wouldn't have to spend a million years sitting out in the cold."

Hawk doesn't look up. "And then Sonic would pursue, and then we'd have to fight him off while trying to kidnap a geriatric former soldier without killing him. Which, given our previous track record..."

The bird trails off and Scourge grimaces. Yeah. They'd given up on kidnappings for a reason. They wouldn't have even considered this one if not for the offer of Anarchy beryl - which has been in extremely short supply recently, given they can't hop dimensions without instantly snagging Zonic's individual attention. And it's not like Scourge isn't flattered that the self-important dimensional cop will drop everything for a chance at catching him, but he's not planning on seeing the inside of Zone Jail ever again.

Anyway. It's a small blessing that Zonic hasn't come looking for them personally, or sent Sonic after them, but it's one Scourge isn't willing to throw away just for a power-up. Thus the kidnapping mission.

Scourge swings his legs contemplatively and longs for Fiona to hurry up so he can bash some heads.

Right on cue, their communicators ring. "Alright, boys," Fiona's voice comes through a little tinnily. "You ready?"

"Heck yeah," Scourge says immediately.

"Ready to go whenever," Hawk confirms.

"Roger. Meet me where we agreed." The comms unit crackles and goes silent. Scourge hops up and starts stretching quickly, trying to limber up his half-frozen muscles. Hawk sets his communicator down and picks the lock on the trapdoor they'd been sitting next to. Once it's open, they slip down a small flight of stairs and through an empty hallway. At the end, they take a right through another hall and stop outside a janitor's closet.

Scourge raps on the door. "Knock, knock," he says.

There's a moment of silence. Then Lightning opens the door. "Hurry up," he whispers, peering over their shoulders.

Scourge clicks his tongue in disappointment. "Dude, you're supposed to say 'who's there.'"

"Yeah, Lightning," Fiona says from inside. "You're ruining the script."

"I- what?" Lightning sputters. "You people are so immature. Simian, can you tell them to shut up?"

There's a good fifteen seconds of judgemental silence. "...you should've said 'who's there.'"

Lightning rolls his eyes and Scourge pushes past him into the room. Simian nods as he enters and Fly, who's doing something he can't quite make out, cackles in a corner. Scourge spreads his arms wide. "Alright, I'm here now, the party can start!"

"Good to have you," Fiona says. She's sitting on an overturned bucket, one ankle folded over her knee and eyes glued to her phone. "Alright, so Plan A failed."

"Yes!"  Scourge cheers, pumping a fist in the air.

Fiona shoots him a glare. "We weren't able to get him away from his bodyguards and the speech is about to start soon. I didn't want to do this in front of a crowd, but we may not have a choice. Right now, we only have to deal with the normal security and Sonic. After the ceremony, they're going to meet up with a bunch of Sonic's friends before going back home to Knothole."

"Wouldn't it be better to wait, then?" Simian asks, folding his arms.

Fiona shakes her head. "No for two reasons. We can handle the normal security easily, especially if we use the crowd for meatshields while Scourge is distracting Sonic. Sonic's friends are, frankly, a much greater threat than the security, and they will not be holding back. And if we wait until they go back to Knothole, we have that... woman to deal with."

Everyone shudders at the mention of Nicole. Their last attempt on Knothole is not a memory anyone wants to relive.

"So if we use the crowd for cover and Scourge's able to distract Sonic for long enough, this is doable," Fiona resumes. "We'll just have to time it right. And we can not let Sonic know our target at all costs. If he realizes we're trying to kidnap his uncle, he won't let the old man out of his sight, and our job will get a lot harder. Got that?"

A quick briefing on everyone's roles later and it's time to go. Scourge starts to follow the guys out the door and is caught short by Fiona's hand on his wrist. "Sweetie, can I talk to you for a second?" she asks and drags him back inside before he can answer.

She turns him loose and Scourge spins around, rubbing his wrist. "Alright, if this is about what I think it's about-"

"Don't worry, I'm not yelling at you. Just..." she trails off to stare at him.

Scourge tries not to fidget and goes for a confident smile, propped up against the wall. "Babe, don't worry about me. This'll be a lark."

"It's... you know." Fiona shrugs and apparently decides to just go for it. "You've been having issues about your dad. I need to know if that'll affect your performance here."

"What?" Scourge is almost kind of offended. If it was anyone but Fi asking, he would be offended. "Babe, my uncle was a total nutjob. Like, worse than my old man. No issues here."

Fiona looks at him a second longer. "Alright," she says at last. "If you say so. I'm counting on you."

She brushes past him on her way out, squeezing his hand on the way, which is nice since she's weird about stuff like that. Scourge follows a minute later.

I require one more thing for my research, Finitevus had said. Charles the Hedgehog. Inventor of the roboticization process. He is receiving an award for his technological advancements in Central City in two days. Bring him to me alive and you will have your full reward.

Scourge scans the crowd for Charles now, leaning on the fancy railing of the fancy indoors balcony overlooking the fancy banquet hall. There's a name for a balcony like this - a mezzasomething - but he can't remember what it is. Maybe Fiona would know.

Scourge tugs at the collar of his unbearably fancy suit jacket and longs for his sunglasses.

He'd told Fiona the truth earlier - his uncle was a wackjob. Paranoid, jittery, simultaneously ravenous for power and terrified of it - no one had liked him, least of all his nephew.

Jules had liked him, probably. Enough to give him a home and a laboratory for his crazy experiments and to turn a blind eye when they started getting darker and more deadly. That had gone on up until Charles had invented a machine that turned moebians to robots, and its first (unwilling) test subject had been Jules.

Yeah. After Ivo managed to save Jules' life, they'd put a stop to that real quick.

They'd told Scourge that Charles had gone far away to someplace he could be happy. He still remembers that scene - Jules crouching down before him with mournful eyes, one arm cold and stiff where the roboticization process had gotten it before Ivo had pulled him out. His flesh hand had been warm and comforting on his shoulder, and Scourge had been so distracted by the touch that he hadn't even cared that his uncle was gone. He'd faked tears just to get Jules to stay with him a little longer.

Scourge shakes his head wildly, dissipating the memories. Anyway, it was painfully obvious in hindsight that Charles had either been jailed or executed for treason. Not that Scourge would have cared either way. Mostly, he's just vaguely curious to see what Charles is like in this world. Still a mad scientist, or something more benevolent?

A mass of whispering erupts at the main entryway of the hall. Scourge straightens up.

A bunch of bodyguards in black enter, followed by a few people who could be family or friends. Sonic's there, obviously, and next to him can only be Uncle Charles.

Scourge doesn't really remember his uncle; he was, after all, a kid when the guy vanished, and he avoided him whenever possible. But the face before him is undeniably like his own. He has the same sloping forehead, the same pointed muzzle. Honestly, he looks exactly like Sonic with a mustache.

Scourge leans forward, intrigued, as the old guy says something that has Sonic pitching forward in laughter. It's weird, seeing him. Not like seeing Jules, or even like seeing the mom. Just... weird.

Not the kind of weird that Fiona's worried about, thank Chaos. No, he'll have no problems handing this schmuck over to the Doc.

Charles and his little squad sit down in the front row while the bodyguards split up to cover the exits. Scourge tracks their positions automatically, mostly focused on the target. Charles claps his nephew on the back and leans over to whisper something in his ear. Scourge looks away with a sneer.

The ceremony starts. A bunch of people Scourge doesn't know talk about a bunch of things he doesn't understand, blah blah blah. Scourge yawns and taps a tattoo on the railing with his claws. Luckily, all the civilians seem to have gone down to the seating area, so he's alone on the balcony. As long as the security doesn't notice him, he should have no problem staying under the radar until it's time to make his move. Until then, he amuses himself trying to find the rest of the Destructix hidden in the crowd.

Down below, the speeches start wrapping up. Charles ruffles his nephew's quills one last time and heads up to the stage. Scourge straightens up as he accepts his award and takes the mic.

"First, I'd like to thank you all for being here today," the hedgehog says. Scourge taps his foot impatiently. "I know it's a bit of a long way for a lot of you - we've got some visitors from Holoska, even! - and it means a lot to me that you'd take the time to make it here today. So thank you."

Ugh, so boring. Can't Fiona hurry up? At this rate, they'll be doing the audience a favor by sparing them all this drivel.

"- of the University of Spagonia for funding my research and going out of his way to help me whenever I needed it. Thank you, old friend."

Scourge taps his communicator and almost jumps when it crackles to life.

"Alright, everyone's in position," Fiona says. "On my mark, Scourge, you're going to distract Sonic. Jump down there, challenge him to a fight, anything. His sole concern needs to be beating you up."

"All he has to do is be himself and Sonic'll be jumping at the chance to tear him a new one," Lightning interjects. "Works on me."

"Oh, shut up," Scourge says. "Fiona, tell him to shut up."

"...well, he has a point."

Lightning's amused huff is audible over the comm. Scourge rolls his eyes. Traitors, all of them.

Fiona's voice goes serious. "But for real. Get him mad and get him out of here. Make him chase you 'till I call you back, and don't give him a second to realize there's more going on. If he comes back here before we're done, it's over. Okay?"

"I got it handled, babe," Scourge says. "Worry about yourself."

"Believe me, I am." The comms go silent a second later. Scourge stands up, shakes the stiffness from his limbs, and hops up to crouch on the railing. It's showtime.

On stage, Charles is still talking. Does the hedgehog not know how to shut up? "And finally, I'd like to thank my family, who loved and supported me every step of the way, up to and including being here with me today as I accept this award. Sonic, my amazing nephew - you've grown so much and, while I wasn't there for all of it-"

Well, that's enough of that. Scourge leaps into the air, curls up, and lands a perfectly executed homing attack on the podium. Splinters, chunks of wood, and a massive dust cloud fly everywhere. Someone in the audience screams, and behind him he can hear Charles stumbling back and coughing furiously.

"Uncle Chuck!" In the front row, Sonic rockets to his feet and dashes forward, only to come skidding to a stop. As the dust dissipates, Scourge grins. He can feel the light glinting off his fangs.

"Long time no see, faker," Scourge spits. He pulls his sunglasses out of the stupid suit jacket's pocket and slides them on with a flourish. "Can't exactly say it's a pleasure seeing you... then again, I always look forward to a chance to kick your butt."

"Wh- Scourge?" the blue idiot sputters. The shock only lasts a matter of seconds before fading, as the flabbergasted expression turns into something more like a smirk. "Well, well. I haven't heard from you since I demolished you and left Zonic to drag your sorry carcass away. Did they let you out on good behavior?"

Good behavior. Hah. As if Sonic knows anything about what goes on in Zone Jail. "Please. I smashed my way out of there the first week. The Zone Jail's in shambles; just ask Zonic! Oh wait - you can't." He laughs.

Sonic's smile slips a notch and the quills on his back bristle. "What happened to Zonic?"

Scourge keeps laughing.

"Alright, pincushion. Maybe you'll tell me when I beat it out of you!" Apparently done talking, Sonic curls up into a spindash. Scourge, still laughing, topples off the wrecked podium and leaves Sonic to smash into the stage where he'd been standing. People are screaming, someone's escorting Charles off the stage, and Scourge is reveling in the chaos.

"Slowing down, blue boy?" he mocks him. "You'll never find out about your stupid friend if you can't even touch me." Zonic's perfectly fine, actually, unless you count the truckload of paperwork Scourge saddled him with after his escape from Zone Jail. Not that Sonic needs to know that, 'cause if anything ticks him off, it's a threat to one of his friends.

And, true to form, Sonic snarls wordlessly and Scourge knows he's got him.

"You're looking kind of slow today - let's see if those legs of yours still work," Scourge calls over his shoulder and takes off. The world blurs around him as he taps into his speed, rockets between panicked partygoers and confused waiters and angry bodyguards. Out of the corner of his eye, he briefly spots Fiona crouching behind a pillar before she's blown away in his wake. Like this, outside sounds, sights, everything drops away, leaving him alone with himself and the wind.

It's nice. Peaceful, even.

And then the only other being who can keep up with him barrels into his side, sending them tumbling over each other right through the big open doors outside. Scourge lands a kick to Sonic's chest, sending him spinning away, and sprints down a sidestreet towards the marketplace. A moment later, the sound of footsteps running at 300 mph picks up behind him.

Scourge grins. The plan's working, then - Sonic's so ticked that he hasn't even stopped to wonder why Scourge isn't stopping to fight, or why he crashed the party in the first place. Now he just has to play this out 'till Fiona's done.

"Been slacking your exercise regimen lately? 'Cause I thought you were faster than this!" Scourge calls out.

"That so?" Sonic returns. The sound is unexpectedly close and Scourge looks back to see Sonic running only a few paces behind him. "I could say the same for you."

Scourge growls and vaults a fruit cart, sending it flying with a back kick. Sonic dodges the cart and dives through the onslaught of flying fruit, coming up without a scratch. Scourge's gained a precious few seconds, but in a contest of speed, those seconds mean everything. He blocks Sonic's path - kicking over trash cans, dodging in front of moving cars, knocking a baby out of its mother's arms with a well placed swipe. Sonic dodges the trash cans, goes over or around the vehicles, and loses a good fifteen seconds saving the baby. By the time they've cleared the marketplace, Scourge is about thirty feet ahead and gaining.

"What's wrong?" Sonic yells. "Scared of a little fight?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Scourge yells back. "Dunno 'bout you, but I'm not wasting my time fighting someone too slow to keep up!" Up ahead, a pile of trash bags is stacked against a sloping wall, reaching up to the edge of the roof. Scourge leaps up in a single bound and sprints along the rooftop. Behind, the trash bags crinkle as Sonic races up, and tiles creak as the hedgehog fights for balance. Scourge snorts and picks up speed.

The rooftop run is fraught with near-misses and almost-falls. This area of town has a mixture of buildings; some are modern and boxy, with flat tops, but there's a number of older structures with pointed tile roofs. Scourge skids down the sloping ridge of one of these, slips off the building, snags a flagpole on the way down and turns his fall into a launch point. He lands upright on the narrow ledge of a skyscraper and darts along the line of windows, flashing a mock salute at some goggle-eyed kid in its bedroom.

Sneakered feet hit the concrete behind him as Sonic pursues, grinning despite his ferocious eyes.

Scourge hooks a fast right as the ledge ends and drops down to the top level of the parking garage nestled against the 'scraper. Mostly he's planning on going back down to street level, but Sonic puts on a burst of speed and tackles him right there.

They roll head over heels across the concrete, colliding with a dusty pickup truck hard enough to dent in the side. Scourge throws himself out of the way and rolls onto his feet just as Sonic picks himself up. The blaring car alarm is the only sound as they stare each other down.

Sonic moves first. He doesn't bother curling up, just lunges fist first at Scourge's face. Scourge ducks the punch and goes in low for Sonic's solar plexus, narrowly dodging a knee to his face. Sonic slams his heel down on Scourge's foot and drives an elbow into his neck. Scourge stumbles back, falling into a roll to avoid Sonic's left hook, and comes up on his feet with room to spare.

There's another moment of staring and circling as they pant heavily and pretend they're not.

And then Sonic steps something that crunches and looks down.

Scourge lunges. Sonic sidesteps him easily and snatches it up - and wait, Chaosdammit that's his communicator-

"Is this a mic?" Sonic asks disbelievingly and then the pieces click.

He stares at Scourge blankly, and Scourge can practically see his train of thought - comms means accomplices, accomplices means there's a plan, a plan means Sonic was intentionally drawn out here away from the ceremony, and if Sonic's out here then -

Then -

Scourge swears and moves to tackle Sonic but the idiot's already gone. Instinctively, his hand goes to his ear - "Fiona, he's coming your way, I-" No, wait, Sonic's got the communicator and it's broken anyway, dammit. The plan's falling apart and it's entirely his fault.

Well. It hasn't fallen apart yet.

Scourge takes off, running full-tilt after Sonic. The irony of the situation isn't lost on him, not that he appreciates it. Sonic's trail is a direct beeline back to the hall. It should be easy to follow, but for some reason Scourge can't catch up those last few feet.

"I thought you wanted to fight, you dingus!" Scourge snaps. "Make up your mind already, sheesh!"

"You tricked me," Sonic growls.

"Uh, yeah? I'm the bad guy. It's kinda what I do."

"What's your actual plan?"

"Thought you were gonna beat me up and find out?"

Sonic snarls and, impossibly, picks up speed. Scourge has to drop the conversation entirely to focus on just keeping up.

They hit the convention hall scarce minutes later. There's clearly a fight going on inside; explosions and the faint sound of screaming accompany the flood of people battering down the doors in their desperation to escape. The Destructix are clearly having fun... and more importantly, haven't escaped yet. What on Moebius are they doing?!

Sonic zips through the crowd, dodging panicking mobians with practiced ease. Scourge doesn't bother; he kicks one middle-aged cat into the heart of the rush and vaults over the resulting pileup without missing a step. "Babe! Hope you're wrapping it up in there!" he yells as they burst into the ceremony hall.

The Destructix are more than holding their own. The security has been almost entirely cleared out; fallen guards litter the area while none of their own are even scratched. Fiona, wielding a G.U.N. issue stun pistol, jerks up in surprise as Sonic skids into the room. "Scourge, you had one job!" she screeches.

"So did you!" Scourge rams into Sonic from behind, sending them both flying into a row of seating. Scourge comes out on top. "What happened to Ch- the target?" he asks, pinning Sonic down with an elbow to his throat.

"Escaped," Fiona says grimly. "We've already informed the Doc... and, uh, we have a new objective now."

Sonic makes a choked-off sound and Scourge leans down harder. Something shifts behind him but he ignores it. "Alright, what is it?"

Fiona hesitates.

And then cold metal claws clamp down around his shoulder and tear him off Sonic, lifting him bodily into the air. The hedgehog wheezes for breath on the ground, but Scourge isn't paying attention. He's not paying attention to anything anymore, because in front of him-

"What the hell are you doing here," Scourge breathes.

Artificial red eyes burn into his own. "Don't touch my son," says Jules, and the anger in his voice causes every limb in Scourge's body to lock up with instinctive fear.

Of course Jules is here, Charles is his brother, why wouldn't he attend the ceremony - hadn't the blasted hedgehog said as much during his speech? Scourge should've realized it then. This was a bad idea, they need to get out of here, why did Scourge even come here in the first place-

Something in Jules' mechanical expression thaws.

The clawhold on his shoulder eases as he's lowered to his feet, but Scourge's brain is still spinning in circles. He's gone completely unresponsive, some part of him knows, but he can't think.

"Get away from him!" Fiona yells and plants a high kick right in the center of Jules' chest. The robian goes flying, pursued by Simian, and Hawk swoops down behind them to tackle Sonic away. "Babe," Fiona says, kneeling down beside Scourge, feeling frantically at his shoulder. "Did he get you?"

The world shifts a little bit back into place. "No," Scourge mutters. "Fiona, I don't-"

"Save it." Fiona's eyes are full of worry as she grabs his wrist and hauls him to his feet. "I think you need to sit this one out, sweetie."

"What? No." Scourge grips her hand like a lifeline. "I can fight. I can still fight."

"Scourge... the new target is Jules."

Something in his chest catches. Scourge stares at her, and around them, the noise of the battle seems to fade. "...what? Why?"

Fiona grimaces. "We lost the inventor of roboticization. Next best thing is its last survivor."

"No. We're not doing that." Scourge has no idea what he's doing, only that they cannot hand his- hand Jules over to Finitevus. He catches both her hands in his own and squeezes them tight. "Call off the mission, we're going home."

Fiona stares at him. "What? Scourge, you can't be serious! After all the work we've put into this? And what about the beryl?"

"We already got the beryl from the first mission. We'll be careful and save it until we can restock. We've gotten this far without any beryl at all, we don't need it that badly!" Scourge hesitates. "...Fiona, please."

It's the last word that breaks her. She knows how bad he hates saying it, knows how much this means to him that he's saying it now. Her shoulders slump in defeat. "...fine. But you get to explain this to the Doc - and please, let's try to avoid burning that bridge again."

Scourge squeezes her hand one last time before letting go. "Thanks, Fi. And don't worry about the Doc; I'll take care of him."

"That's what I'm worried about," Fiona grumbles, but she's smiling. "Alright, team," she calls out, pulling out her warp ring. "Mission's off. We're going home."

"Wait, what?" Hawk asks and nearly gets clobbered by Sonic for his trouble. "Why?"

"Ask questions when we get home," Fiona says and throws the ring. As the portal whooshes open, Scourge turns to survey the troops. Lightning and Simian are slowly retreating back to the portal, fighting Jules every step of the way, while Hawk and Fly are trying without much success to fend off Sonic long enough to run.

Scourge spindashes into Sonic, knocking him off-balance. "Get to the portal, idiots!" To Sonic, he adds, "Sorry, but it looks like we're cutting this date short." If Chaos has even a drop of mercy in its unforgiving soul, Sonic will have been too thoroughly distracted by the fight to have overheard his exchange with Fiona.

And it looks like for once, his prayers are answered, because Sonic's grin, strained with exhaustion though it is, hints at nothing off. "I'm not letting you get away this time," he says and launches into another spindash. "I still have some questions for you to answer!"

"Then they'll have to wait for next time." Scourge ducks the attack and slams his heel into Sonic as he passes, boosting his momentum to slam into the opposite wall. "Alright, time to go!" he yells, scrambling for the portal. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees the rest of the Destructix doing the same.

Fiona's already waiting at the portal, with one leg halfway through, and-

"-aaaaaAAAUGH, WHAT THE HELL," she screams and falls back, pinwheeling wildly.

"Fiona!" Scourge yells and then the world blurs briefly and he's at her side, hauling her to her feet. "Fi, what's-" and then he screams too, because Finitevus is literally right there, climbing through the ring like a monster in a horror movie.

The battle cuts off. A few feet away, a newly recovered Sonic skids to a stop, staring incredulously. The Destructix are sort of ranged out behind him, looking to Scourge and Fiona for the next move. And who knows where Jules is.

"Dude," Scourge says emphatically, putting a hand to his chest. "Don't do that."

"What are you doing," Finitevus hisses.

Scourge makes a show of looking around. "Uh, escaping? I mean, what does it look like?"

"I should have known better than expect you lot to pull through," Finitevus mutters, and hey, that's actually kind of offensive.

"Hey! Screw you, man!" Scourge yells, shaking his fist. "We're leaving 'cause we want to, not 'cause we're losing!" Fiona slaps a palm to her face.

"Oh? And what possible reason could you have to do that?" Finitevus asks, but he doesn't seem very interested in an answer, because his hands flare with dark energy a second later, and Scourge knows what that means.

"Scatter!" he yells and hits the ground with Fiona as a bolt of Chaos energy goes right over their heads. Fiona rolls out from under him as he leaps to his feet.

Sonic seems to have switched targets. Currently, he's hammering away at Finitevus' defenses, running his mouth the whole time. The ring portal is still open behind Finitevus, but they need to get the crazy echidna out of the way first.

Fiona, as usual, is two steps ahead. "You're going to need to team up with Sonic."

"What, seriously? Can't we just let Sonic take care of the Doc and ditch?"

She gives him a flat look. "I don't know how he did it, but Finitevus must have hijacked the ring's signal and keyed it to his lair. I need time to reset it before we can leave. Just, you know-" she waves a hand vaguely. "Move the fight away. Whale on Finitevus. Keep them both off my back long enough for me to work."

"Ugh. Fine." Scourge turns around on his heel. "Hey, loser!" he calls out, cupping his hands around his mouth. "Five minute truce?"

Sonic uncurls in midair long enough to yell, "Make it two!"

Fiona had better work fast, because this isn't going to take long. "Destructix, watch Fiona's back," he orders and throws himself into the fight.

Finitevus was clearly anticipating something like this, because he moves smoothly into defending against the both of them without hesitation. And it's - frustrating. Whenever Scourge throws a punch, a ring portal swirls into being in just the right place to take his hit. If he tries a kick, the same thing. And Chaos forbid he spindashes, or he'll wind up on the opposite side of the room (or, more accurately, slamming into Sonic).

Between the ring portals and the constant misdirection, the two minute mark passes and they haven't landed a single hit. The guy isn't on their level, exactly, but he's unpredictable with enough tricks that he could probably take either of them on their own. Against both of them, he doesn't stand a chance - or he wouldn't if Sonic would get out of his way.

"Dude, we're supposed to be working together!" Sonic snaps.

Scourge flicks his ear (it's been ringing since Finitevus dropped a portal that sent a spindashing Sonic on a collision course with Scourge's face) and ducks beneath a Chaos-infused punch. "Not my fault you can't keep up."

He sidesteps a second punch and follows up with a roundhouse kick that comes inches from the Doc's face before another ring portal intercepts. Dammit.

Sonic, of course, chooses that moment to go for a homing attack, which takes him right into the portal as Finitevus dodges. From somewhere on the other side of the room, the moron makes a faint oomph sound as the portal spits him out.

Scourge rolls his eyes and sweeps his legs under Finitevus' ankles, forcing the echidna to stumble back. "You make a remarkably disloyal minion," Finitevus says and drops into a portal.

On a hunch, Scourge spins around and slams a haymaker into Finitevus' face when the echidna reappears behind him. "Calling me a minion was your first mistake, Doc," Scourge says. "I'm the king, baby."

Finitevus snarls and vanishes again. "I must wonder at the cause of this particular instance," his voice says. Scourge whirls around, fists up before him, but the scientist is nowhere to be seen. "You were, after all, so eager to serve at first. What changed your mind?"

"You really gotta learn the difference between serving and making a deal, bud," Scourge says. "This why your friends always leave you?"

Finitevus ignores him. "Nothing changed between then and now. Nothing... except the target." Something flickers in the corner of Scourge's eye and he starts to turn, but he's met with a blow to the jaw followed by one to the shin. Scourge crumples to his knee with a cry of pain and looks up to see Finitevus' Chaos-powered boot swing for his face-

And then someone's hand snags his wrist and they're moving.

The world blurs just a little as Sonic hauls him across the room at lightning speed to drag him behind an overturned table. Scourge clutches the lapels of his jacket and tries to force his racing heartbeat to settle. For a second, they just breathe.

"Okay, we need to coordinate," Sonic says belatedly.

"Don't tell me what to do," Scourge says, mostly on reflex.

Sonic rolls his eyes. "If you draw his fire, I'll go behind to take him offguard. Think you can do that?"

"What? No. You draw his fire and I'll sneak up behind him."

"Yeah, maybe I'd do that if I had any faith at all in your stealth. You aren't exactly subtle, bud."

Scourge thinks back to every mission that involved some level of sabotage/stealth/general sneakery and their inevitably disastrous ends and winces. Unfortunately, he has a point. "Fine, whatever. Don't mess this up, dweeb." A blast of chaos energy rocks the floor beneath their feet - time's up. Finitevus is here.

Scourge breaks for the left.

"Hey old man, having trouble keeping up?" He leaps into the air as Finitevus goes for a sweeping kick and curls into a spindash, aimed at the scientist's head. Predictably, he sails right into a ring portal and falls out several feet away. In midair, he uncurls and kicks off the ground to rebound towards Finietvus.

The Doc raises his hands coated in Chaos energy and actually catches the spindash. For a moment, they war against each other - dark energy to living buzzsaw - before Finitevus shoves back and they break apart.

Scourge hits the ground in a crouch and lunges again. This time, he feints an uppercut followed up with a knee strike to the gut. The echidna stumbles back, but recovers almost instantly. As Scourge goes in for another strike, Finitevus snags his collar and yanks him off-balance, slamming him into the dirt. Scourge tries to wriggle out of his grip, but the Doc pins him to the ground with a hand on his throat and a knee on his chest.

"I can't say I haven't been waiting for this," the mad scientist breathes, and raises a handful of swirling black energy.

Scourge scrabbles helplessly at his wrist and wonders, briefly, if this is it.

And then a blue ball of spikes rockets out of nowhere, smacking into the back of Finitevus' head so hard the floor creaks when he faceplants. Scourge kicks him off and rolls back onto his feet, smacking away Sonic's outstretched hand. The echidna staggers upright, but his shield is broken and Sonic and Scourge poised on either side of him. The echidna eyes them warily, rings at the ready, and for a second no one moves.

"Got it!" Fiona's voice breaks the spell.

Sonic's concentration slips. Scourge can see it; the way his posture straightens slightly, the way he half-turns to face her. Finitevus sees it too.

And then Finitevus' hands are up, radiating dark energy, and Scourge drops into a defensive stance 'cause the blue buffoon can get himself killed if he wants but Scourge is going down fighting- but Finitevus isn't looking at either of them.

He's looking behind them.

At Jules.

Jules, who has no Chaos abilities, can't break the sound barrier on a whim, can't dodge bullets point-blank.

Jules, who both is his father and isn't, who's a machine but still alive, who stood across from Scourge in a dark room and didn't flinch though Scourge held his life in his hands, who loves his wife and child and wouldn't hesitate to die for either of them.

Jules, who would walk a random stranger through a panic attack on the street but can't dodge a Chaos spear if it's pointed at his chest.

Time slows down to a crawl. Scourge doesn't think.

He just moves.

The last thing he sees, as pain erupts from his chest like lightning and the world is drowned out by the black of corrupted Chaos energy, is the bright red of Jules' horrified eyes.

There's a beeping noise somewhere near his ear. Fiona's phone, probably (even though it sounds nothing like her alarm). Scourge reaches up to shut it off and is stopped halfway by the clink of cold metal.

...huh?

He opens his eyes to dim electric light and a pounding headache. There's a hard surface beneath his back, thin sheets around him, and a metallic chill around his wrists, ankles, and throat.

Through the haze, something about the last one feels familiar.

Beside him, something rustles, and a soft voice says, "Awake, then?"

"Dad?" Scourge mumbles foggily. For a moment he's eight again, in the hospital after a near-drowning, and his dad took a whole day off from work to rush to his bedside and hold his hand. It was the first time he'd seen him in a week.

Then reality catches up and reminds him that no, his dad is dead and whatever's going on here is something to worry about. The fog is gone in an instant.

Scourge's eyes snap open and he throws himself as much he can to the far side of the bed from the figure standing there now. Jules is there - a little scratched and dinged up but very much alive.

There's a flicker of something like relief inside him before Scourge stuffs it down and crushes it very firmly. Chaos, Fiona was right. He let his stupid hangups about this robian get out of hand, and now look what's happened - the mission went south, Scourge is chained to a hospital bed, the rest of the Destructix are nowhere to be seen, and worst of all, he made a heroic sacrifice like he's Sonic or something.

Chaos, Scourge is never living this one down.

"It's good to see you're moving around already," Da- Jules says in that same too-soft tone. "Some of the doctors were convinced you wouldn't live another day. I suppose any son of mine, even from another dimension, is just too durned stubborn to go out like that..."

"Don't," Scourge rasps.

Jules blinks at him. "Pardon?"

"That." Scourge lets go of the bed's railing just long enough to gesture irritably. "I'm not your son. Don't call me that."

Instead of rearing back in offense or dropping the nice act altogether, Jules tilts his head slightly, as though in recognition. "Ah," he says after a moment. "So that was you."

Scourge freezes and tries to play it off. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"That day in front of Chuck's diner," Jules says. "That was you. I wasn't sure, since you were still supposed to be in Zone Jail then."

"Chuck's diner? What?" Scourge forces a laugh. It comes out entirely fake and just a little unhinged.

"You had a panic attack," Jules continues, unperturbed. "I walked you through it. Honestly, at the time, I thought it was because of me."

It was because of you, Scourge wants to say. Instead, he asks, "Whaddya mean?"

Jules gestures vaguely to himself. "I'm a robian," he says. "Robotnik put Knothole through a lot when the roboticizor was still functioning. Plenty of people have had... adverse reactions to my body in the past. It's unfortunate but can't really be helped, except through time and patience."

...for some reason, that stings. Scourge pushes the thought away and snorts. "Sucks to be you. Don't see what that has to do with me."

"You did ask," Jules reminds him, which is fair. He supposes. They lapse into silence.

Scourge slumps against the bed, a little more relaxed with no attack evidently imminent, and holds up a hand to the light. The dangling cuff glints coldly. He can't reach the collar on his neck, but he suspects it shines the same way - like the inhibitors back at Zone Jail. "You guys already talked to Zonic, then?" he guesses.

He's not really expecting an answer, but Jules gives one anyway. "We did. He gave us that inhibitor collar you're wearing right now." Nailed it. "He wanted to take you back with him to Zone Jail right away, but with the condition you were in, we didn't want to risk moving you until you were stable."

Scourge flexes his fingers, watching the muscles move. He'd suspected already, given how drained he feels right now, but knowing that he's wearing the collar is... disheartening. That level of powerlessness is something he'd never wanted to feel again. "I'm stable now. So when will you be moving me?"

Jules hesitates. "Now that you're awake, we'll probably call Zonic to pick you up sometime tomorrow. It's nighttime right now."

"What? How long was I out?"

"Two days."

Two days, and he's still here? Either the Destructix got nabbed too (possible), are planning a rescue mission (unlikely), or ditched (most likely). That... also stings. A lot. He'd liked Fiona, and he was getting used to the rest of the idiots, too.

"What about my team?" he asks.

"Vanished. They tried to retrieve you but retreated when reinforcements arrived."

It doesn't mean much - he is, after all, their strongest fighter and tactically it makes sense to avoid losing him if possible - but it makes Scourge feel better to know they'd at least tried. He lets his hand fall back to the bed with a metallic jingle.

"I still don't understand," Jules says, and Chaos, why won't he shut up? Is this something inherent to Sonic's family? "Why did you save me?"

Scourge inspects the patterns of cracks on the ceiling. That one looks like Sleuth Dog's face. "I have no idea what you're talking about," he mumbles.

"You took an attack meant for me. That much concentrated Chaos energy would've killed me - it's likely the only reason you survived is because you're a very adept controller."

"Sounds like you already have an answer to me."

There's a brief pause. Scourge continues avoiding eye contact. "I do have an idea," Jules says softly. "But I'd like to hear a confirmation from your own mouth."

Scourge doesn't say anything.

What's he supposed to say - that every time he sees Jules some stupid, long-dead part of him longs for his approval? That Jules is dredging up memories better left buried? That when he saw his dad - any version of him - in danger, that his first instinct was to protect him, despite everything he'd done?

Ha. Yeah, right.

"Think what you want, old man." Scourge bares his teeth. "It doesn't mean anything. It was an accident."

Jules doesn't waver. "I think we both know that's not true."

Can't this guy take no for an answer? Scourge huffs and rolls over as much as he can so his back is toward Jules. "Leave," he says. It's what you're best at, after all.

"Sonic heard that you attacked the ceremony to kidnap Chuck."

Scourge has a sudden, sinking feeling he knows where this is going. "I don't care. Go away."

Jules marches on, implacable. "He said that halfway through, after Chuck escaped, Finitevus told you to switch targets. That the new target was me."

"Shut up!"

"And that when you heard I was in danger, you-"

"So I called it off, alright?" Scourge bolts upright. The handcuffs snap back against his wrists painfully and his ankles scream as the cuffs cut into his skin, but he's too furious and aching and raw to care. "Yeah, I called off the mission. Yeah, I took that stupid attack. It doesn't change anything! I'm still your enemy, I'm still going to kill Sonic, I'm still going to tear apart your world and everything you love! So what if I- if I..."

"Risked all that to save one broken-down, tactically unimportant robian?" Jules finishes quietly.

"Yes! No!" Scourge tries to bury his face in his hands and can't even do that, damn this tiny range of motion. "Will you leave me alone?" Metal glints in the corner of his eye as Jules reaches out a hand. Scourge growls deep in his throat until the hand is slowly drawn back.

Mercifully, the robian is silent while Scourge desperately tries to keep himself from falling apart. Chaos, what is wrong with him?

"What do you want from me," he mutters.

This time, it's Jules who looks away. "There's not much time before I have to call Zonic in," he says. "Before he left the first time, there was talk of... life in solitary confinement. Or execution."

Breathe. It's fine. Scourge has been in worse scrapes before. "I can see where the similarities between you and my dad come in," he says softly. Venomously. "He never hesitated to lock me away, either." Sure, it hadn't exactly been tossing him in a prison cell and throwing away the key, but the perpetual grounding to an empty mansion, the total abandonment of him to an endless stream of nannies... and then, of course, that fiasco right before he died.

Dads. So eager to foist their screwups on other people, wash their hands and move on.

"Doesn't any of this setup seem odd to you?" Jules asks abruptly.

Scourge blinks, thrown. "What? You hit your head somewhere, old man?"

"Think about it. You're a top-priority prisoner. You've broken out of Zone Jail. And yet your only security here is an inhibitor collar, some handcuffs, and a broken-down old robian."

...there's a trap here somewhere, Scourge knows it. "Yesss?" He eyes Jules warily. Is this some kinda reverse-psychology thing?

Jules laughs wearily. "You're not the only one with emotional ties he can't quite cut, son."

"Don't call me that," Scourge says reflexively before the weight of Jules' words catch up to him. "Wait, what? Are you saying-" and then he cuts off, because that's so ridiculous it shouldn't be said out loud.

"Yes," Jules confirms. "I volunteered for guard duty because I had to ask, first. To make sure for myself that something of my son is in there."

"I am not your son," Scourge snaps. Distantly, some part of him recognizes that he's being actively detrimental - that if he plays his cards right he could actually walk out of this free - but he's past that kind of rational behavior now. "You're chasing ghosts, old man! Stop looking for stuff that isn't gonna happen!"

"You're not my son," Jules agrees. "You're not my Sonic. But you're a Sonic, and somewhere... that potential for great good is inside you."

And isn't that exactly what Sonic had said on their last birthday - the day he'd finally ditched that lame Anti-Sonic moniker, had finally stepped out of Sonic's shadow into his own light - that all it'd take is a bit of decency, and Scourge would be just like him? The echo stills him.

"You're making a mistake," he says hoarsely. He's not going back to Zone Jail, he'll die before he goes back to that hellhole, but he needs Jules to understand this. "I'm not Sonic. I'm no hero. If you let me go, I'm just gonna go right back to doing what I did before. People will die because of you."

"No, they won't," Jules says, half-smiling. "I've done my research. The Destructix don't kill. You wreak havoc and destroy things, but... no bodies. I understand it's to avoid trouble with G.U.N.," he adds, holding up a hand to forestall Scourge's protests, "But you don't have a body count. That's important."

Shows what he knows - but Scourge can't bring himself to point out the obvious. "I still ruin lives," Scourge says instead. "There's other ways to kill people without holding a gun to their heads."

"I know. And that's where I'm being selfish." The half-smile turns into a full smile, but it's so sad and wracked with exhaustion and bitterness that Scourge has to look away. "I... I lost my son once. I can't help it... I can't watch a son of mine - from any universe - be destroyed while I can do anything to stop it. I'm not a good person, Scourge. I've lost too much to try. So I'm going to be selfish, just this once, and hope you don't make me regret it."

Scourge is silent. He's silent when Jules stands up and unlocks the cuffs, one by one. He's silent when Jules reaches up to his throat to unlock the inhibitor, and he's silent when it falls away and power rushes freely beneath his skin once more.

His boots are on the floor, suit jacket draped over a chair. He pulls on the shoes and digs through the pockets until he finds his sunglasses, but leaves the jacket behind.

"Scourge," Jules says quietly, as Scourge pushes the window open. He hesitates over the window sill, half inside and half out.

If Jules asks him to stay, he doesn't know what he'll do.

But he doesn't. In the end, Jules looks down and whispers, "If you ever need somewhere to rest, my home is always open. Till then... be safe, son."

The words catch in Scourge's throat. He nods, wordlessly, and drops out of the window to land lightly on his feet on the ground below. For a moment, he dallies beneath the window, waiting for-

For...

He doesn't know. Scourge shivers in the cool night air and starts running.

...thanks, Dad.

He finds the base a few hours later, jogging to the next town over and hopping a train the rest of the way. When he walks in, the base goes dead silent.

Fiona leaps up from the circle of Destructix - planning a rescue mission, he later finds out - and tackles him, hugging and pounding him in equal measure. She cries a little too, which he only discovers when she points out he's tearing up himself. The Destructix surround them, yelling over each other and clapping him on the back until Simian picks them all up in a group hug. It's at that point that Scourge declares he's done with all this mushy stuff and if they don't knock it off he won't bother coming back next time. Fiona announces that if there is a next time he won't have to worry about coming back because she'll kill him first, and Simian gives them all one last squeeze before turning them loose.

Scourge retrieves his leather jacket with a sense of great relief and they all end up watching another trashy samurai movie, which Lightning ruins again. Fiona holds him tight the whole time and doesn't chew him out like he deserves, for which Scourge is unendingly grateful.

He doesn't go back to the house. He pulls jobs with the Destructix, they beat up on Sonic and his lackeys, they have one run-in which Finitevus that they come off much worse for. And they watch crappy movies, eat ridiculous amounts of junk food, and get personally banned from every arcade and amusement park across the continent. He's... not gonna lie, it's actually pretty fun.

But in the back of his head, the house is always there. The robian bustling around the empty kitchen in a pink apron. The scent of pancakes frying. Till then... be safe, son.

It takes a long time - months of denial, of wondering and longing and furious self-restraint - but he caves eventually.

He shows up on a morning he knows Sonic and his mom won't be there. He doesn't knock on the door, or ring the bell. Mostly, he just hovers outside, unable to work up his nerve to do anything.

He's about to leave when the door swings open. Jules stands there, looking exactly the same as he did that night by the hospital bed, with eyes too soft for his wayward not-son. Scourge, half-frozen on the sidewalk, searches for something to say and comes up empty. They stare at each other silently.

Scourge shoves his hands in his pockets and forces back the lump in his throat. "I was in the area, so I dropped by," he mutters. "Don't think this means anything."

Jules looks at him for a long moment and Scourge forgets to breathe. Slowly, softly, his dad smiles. "Welcome home, son."

[girlwithshipsshitshow]

Part 25

(Misaki Kneeled in front of his parents grave, tightly holding Usagi's hand, even though his tie had just been fixed before they left they house, it was somehow already crooked. He had no idea what to say, should he start by apologizing that he hadn't been to visit in the last fourteen years? Or introduce Usagi first like it's just a normal conversation.)

Misaki: (lets out a long sigh, Usagi Squeezing his hand for encouragement). Uh, hey mom, dad. This feels weird, I know I never really came to visit, mostly because for the longest time I thought your death was my fault, a-a-and I know that sounds dumb but it's true, so I never came, I'm here today because I lot is happening. I'm graduating!, I'm also getting married, to this guy. He's the love of my life, if you guys we're alive I'd think you'd love him. (He smiled gently at Usagi), His name is Akihiko Usami, but I call him Usagi. He's amazing, the best thing that's ever happened to me. I'm so lucky to have him, I want you to meet him.

Usagi: Um hi, I don't know how to introduce myself, should I say Usagi? (He ducked his head), No that sounds weird, I'm Usami. Misaki says he's the best thing that's ever happened to him, but truthfully, he saved me, I would not be this person without him. Before we met I was kinda an awful person, I never let anyone in, I was a mess, I almost died a few times, I never ate properly, I never really opened myself up to anyone, I had al these walls up, then Misaki came and I was this a different person. (he chuckled softly), Some might say softer. Misaki is the only person I've truly felt combatable with, he's my soulmate and best friend, the best person you could ever ask for, he's doing okay, he's happy, I'm so grateful for him.

Misaki: (softly), Usagi... (He wrapped his arms around the older man, leaning into him), I love you.

Usagi: I love you too. Thank you for bringing me here.

Misaki: Thank you for coming.

Usagi: You're parents would be so proud of you.

Misaki: How do you know?

Usagi: Because I'm so proud of you, how could they not be.

Misaki: Thank you.

(They stayed there for a while, in a silent embrace paying their respects, Misaki was happy he decied to come, he needed it. He was so grateful to have this man in his life, and really needed the support today.)

Monday March 16, 2020... six days before graduation.

(Misaki woke up feeling beside him, the space was empty, he was confused, usually this early in the morning Usagi would still be asleep, he rubbed his eyes, blinked a few times then gave his eyes a few seconds to adjust to the light, turning his head towards the alarm clock he realized it was only eight am, yeah Usagi should definitely still be asleep).

Misaki: Usagi?! (He called loudly, his voice was groggy from just waking up)

Usagi: Good morning, (He smirked entering the room with a tray of breakfast consisting of coffee, eggs, hash browns, and bacon).

Misaki: (Smirks): What's all this?

Usagi: (Sitting on the bed carefully placing the tray between them, he hands Misaki the cup of coffee and places a kiss on his cheek). I made you breakfast.

Misaki: You didn't have to do that. (He takes a sip of coffee, the warmth wakes up his body, he smirks, taking Usagi's hand), You're amazing.

Usagi: I know it's not a trinational bra-

Misaki: Stop it, I love it. (He smiles, taking a bit of everything), It's great.

Usagi: I'm glad you think so.

Misaki: So why are you up so early?

Usagi: A man can't wake up early to make breakfast for his fiancé?

Misaki: (Smirks, giving him a knowing look).

Usagi: Um, Isaka called last night after you went to sleep-

Misaki: How rude, Doesn't he know not to call in the middle of the night?

Usagi: I agree, but he's my boss.

Misaki: He's your friend, and as your friend he should know not too.

Usagi: He wanted to talk to you, but I told him you were asleep.

Misaki: Why does he want to talk to me?

Usagi: He wants to have a meeting with you today about us, and you being my assistant.

Misaki: Um, why now? I'm not starting until like the begging of may.

Usagi: I don't know, but he want's to meet at noon, so eat up.

Misaki: I'm supposed to tell you to do that. You're still recovering you know.

Usagi: So, feed me.

Misaki: (Smirks, feeds Usagi a piece of bacon, the older boy takes his hand lacing his fingers through his, pulling him into a kiss, knocking the food on the bed). Usagi!

Usagi: We can clean it up. (He pulls Misaki on top of him, running his hands through his hair, they kiss passionately), Hey, (he pulls away breathing heard, pushing hair out of Misaki's face, (wanna take this to the shower?

Misaki: I don't know Usagi... (He trailed off, he Missed having Usagi inside off him, he missed being inside of Usagi, but they only had six more days till they could have sex again, surely they could wait it out right?)

Usagi: I know we have six more days till we can have sex again but.. I can help you shower right? (He grinned kissing Misaki's neck, the younger boy moaned.)

Misaki: Um, do you really think it's a good idea to show up to a meeting with love bites on my neck?

Usagi: That's okay, I can put them other places.

Misaki: We can shower together, but maybe nothing that will cause a delay in getting ready?

Usagi: Fine, (He sat, gently pushing Misaki to stand), But you owe me.

Misaki: (Grins leaning down), We have three whole weeks alone once I graduate, that trip you planned, I know where it is by the way, not in Tokyo, we'll have plenty of time to do other things.

Usagi: (Wraps his arms around Misaki's neck), Good, and we are never leaving the bedroom.

Misaki: Okay. (Kisses Usagi, then pulls him up leading him to the bathroom), Now help me wash my hair, I love when you do it.

Usagi: No problem.

(Misaki Stood outside Isaka's door he was nervous, he kept messing with his tie, it was crooked again. Usagi glanced at him, fixed his tie, and his hair).

Usagi: Sweetie, you have to relax, you already have the job, trust me, being my assent will be easier for everyone. (He kissed him softly on his forehead). Just go in, he's expecting you.

Misaki: You should come to, I'm sure he'd loved to see you.

Usagi: I can't help you with this one, he told me I wasn't allowed.

Misaki: (Sighs), Okay. I love you.

Usagi: And I love you. You're amazing, you can do this. I'm going to bug Eri.

Misaki: Leave her Alone.

Usagi: She loves me.

Misaki: Usagi-san!

Usagi: TOO LATE (at the elevator), I'm already here! Good luck! I believe in you!

Isaka: (Opens door): Misaki! (Hugs him tightly), Get in here! Lets talk.

Isaka: You already have the job, this is just a formality. No one wants to be his assistant.

Asahina: No one.

Misaki: (Angry): No one asked you lover boy.

Isaka: Things you can't do in public, Holding hands.

Misaki: What about y'all?

Isaka: You already know about us.

Misaki: When I start the Job, everyone will know the two of us are engaged.

Asahina: Fair point, even so, you can't be all over each other.

Isaka: Keep it professional.

Asahina: To be fair Isaka; If you had it your way, we would be all over each other at work, but you don't so.

Isaka: Anyway, Meetings, he still hates them.

Misaki: I know, but he has to have them, we need to keep them to an hour, book signings and releases should be at least an hour and half not all day events, although if I'm there we can probably get them for two hours, he won't do much more than that, even if I'm with him. Events that have to be longer, he would only do a day long event, no matter what, he hardly wants to be at my graduation, I don't even want to be there.

Isaka: What about b-

Misaki: Book tour? That's a joke.

(Isaka and Asahina glanced at each other, frowning).

Misaki: A BOOK TOUR? NO WAY WHY?

Isaka: He wrote four books, we want all of them out at the same time, we figu-

Misaki: Okay, some of those we're written under his pen name you can't-

Isaka: Maybe it's time for him to come clean about that.

Misaki: What?

Isaka: He came out, you guys are going to come out as a couple, I'm sure he'll be fine with it, plus he would probably make more money if people knew the books were about you two.

Misaki: The early ones weren't. He doesn't want my brother finding out about that. (Misaki blushed he was turning beat red, this was not happening).

Isaka: Him, or you? We'll just call him up here and ask... (He picked up the phone, dialing a number).

Eri: So have you guys deiced on a date?

Usagi: No, but Misaki knows how much I love Cherry blossoms so maybe in the spring, but also snow is important to us, so could be in the winter.

Eri: You can't plan that though.

Usagi: Doesn't matter, ever significant event in our lives happened when it was snowing, or snow started. It's fate.

Eri: (Smiles) Like you two.

Usagi: Exactly.

Eri: So d, (Her phone starts ringing) One sec, (She rolls her eyes), Its Isaka, (Picks the phone up), What? he is, we're busy, fine, he'll say no but I'll send him up anyway... Okay, Yeah we can do lunch, the five of us? you ask them. Bye Isaka. (Puts the phone back in the receiver, roiling her eyes), He's a pain in the ass.

Usagi: I know, what did he want?

Eri: He want's to talk to you, I told him you'd say no, but you should go up there anyway.

Usagi: What was his question?

Eri: (Sighing), I'd go find out.

Usagi: Okay. (Stands, leaning down to hug Eri).

Eri: Oh, and we're all having lunch together.

Usagi: Of course we are.

(Misaki taps his fingers in the desk, he can feel himself turning red by the second, when Usagi walks in and sits beside him he freezes, he hasn't felt like this around him in A long time).

Usagi: What's up?

Misaki: (Through gritted teeth), you don't want to know.

Isaka: How do you feel about doing a book tour?

Usagi: (Folds arms, leaning back in seat), I think you already Know the answer to that. What else?

Isaka: You're books about the two of, the ones under your pen name?

Usagi: Yeah, I know the ones? What about them?

Misaki: He want's you to say you're the one who wrote them.

Usagi: No, I can't do that, I don't want anyone to know I wrote the early ones.

Misaki: That's what I said.

Isaka: Like Misaki's brother?

Usagi: I can't ever let him know how I felt about him. If it was know I wrote those books, and thought about that... oh god (Places head in hands), and if I think about doing that stuff with Misaki.

Misaki: (Blushing harder)

Isaka: Wow, I didn't know you could turn that red.

Asahina: That is interesting.

Usagi: I can't do a book tour, two of the three books I wrote are the books about Misaki and I.

Isaka: But the other two aren't.

Misaki: He'll do a two month book tour with his books under his name.

Isaka: I think we can figure out a way to release the books under your pen name without any trouble.

Usagi: The scenes were Eri's ideas, most of them.

Misaki: My brother doesn't read that, but he will if he knows that you wrote them.

Isaka: Maybe we only print the new ones? Wipe the old ones out of exc-

Usagi: I'm telling you no!

Isaka: Some people already know, you kinda let it slip when you came out.

Usagi: I know, but I don't want anyone to know who doesn't already, plus I have the "All names are completely a coincidence"

Misaki: Yeah, right. We are going on tour with his two new books, "Beautifully drawing swords" and "Broken scars".

Isaka: Why are those titles so sad.

Misaki: A lot of his are, do you even read his books?

Usagi: The books aren't sad, "Broken scars" is-

Misaki: It's about two who are broken, they meet by chance after running away from home, fall in love and learn that broken people can heal scars.

Usagi: (Smiles) Yeah, You read the manuscript?

Misaki: Of course I did, Beautifully drawing swords was good too, more of a short story though, I wish it was longer.

Usagi: I wanted it to be, but the more I was writing it, the more I thought it worked better as a short story.

Isaka: What's that one about?

Misaki: A girl who collects swords finds a broken one a thrift shop, and makes it into a new one, she bonds with another girl across the street, and they talk about their sword collection, it's cute.

Isaka: Doesn't sound like something you'd usually write.

Usagi: I know, but I Got inspiration from a picture that Mahiro made, Eri thought it would sell, if she didn't I wouldn't have written it.

Misaki: I think kids will love it, and teens.

Isaka: I like it.

Usagi: You did agree to it.

Isaka: Did I?

Asahina: Yeah you did.

Isaka: Oh, well... it sounds sweet.

Misaki: I'm proud of him.

Isaka: You should be. Misaki, you're going to make a great assistant for him. No one can handle him like you, I mean I guess Eri, but you got him to write four books in two months, and all of them are amazing.

Misaki: (Shrugs), I don't know how.

Usagi: (Wraps his arms around Misaki), Because you're amazing, and I love you.

Misaki: I love you.

Isaka: What do you say we all go get lunch? Anyone up for pizza?

Asahina: Sure, call Eri, lets meet her in the lobby.

Misaki: Thanks for lunch Eri, (He hugged her tightly).

Eri: Anytime, hey so can I come hang out with yall later, Rose is working all week, and it's going to be lonely going home.

Usagi: Sure, but just for a bit, and you can't spend the night.

Isaka: (Laughs), Classic Usagi, not letting anyone in. (Points to Misaki), except Chibi here. (He pulls him into a hug. You're the only one.

Usagi: (Annoyed), Get off him.

Misaki: (Pushes Isaka off), Go hug your boyfriend.

Isaka: How did you do it.

Misaki: Even If I knew, I wouldn't tell you.

Usagi: (Takes Misaki's hand), No one can but him, and if we have kids.

Eri: You would spoil your kids, especially if you had a baby girl, Please have kids now!

Misaki: Can we finish building our house first? and get married?

Eri: (Clears throat), Oh yeah, sure. But after.

Misaki: You'd still want to be our surrogate right? because it might be hard japan stil-

Eri: Misaki, yes and don't worry, Rose said Ren can help, it's going to be okay.

Isaka: speaking of marriage, you guys still can't technically-

Usagi: We Know, Go to work, Asahina, take him upstairs.

Asahina: Got it, (Smirks), Pulling Isaka inside.

Isaka: HEY! YOU WORK FOR ME!

Asahina: (whispering) I'm the boss in this relationship.

Isaka: (Blushes).

Usagi: We know we need a Partnership certification.

Misaki: And that it doesn't grant us everything that a marriage would, but It's the best we can do right now.

Eri: When do you guys want to get married?

Misaki: (Grins), Winter, (He takes Usagi's hand), The snow is special to us.

Eri: You should get started now, at least looking at the documents, I heard it can take up to five moths. (Walks towards building). I'll email some information.

Misaki: (Siting on Usagi's lap, they are in his office on the couch, documents for the certificate in front of them. He sighs bowing air out), I didn't think it would be this much, we have to do this much!

Usagi: Yes. It doesn't change your mind, does it?

Misaki: (Turns to look at Usagi), What? Of course not, (He takes Usagi's face, rubbing his thumbs against his soft skin), No, it just means we have to look through all of this carefully, so we only have to do it once. If we start in August, we can have our certificate by December, maybe a little before. We'll also start the movie process by then, if we don't have any problems our house should be ready by the summer right?

Usagi: (He places his hands on Misaki's), Right, and by December we'll be moved in, we wanted to have a ceremony at our house anyway.

Misaki: Exactly It's perfect! (He grinned kissing Usagi hard), Now we need to put this in a safe place.

Usagi: I have just the spot. (He lifted Misaki, placing him beside him, stood up walked over to his desk. Opening a drawer in the bottom of his desk, he pulled out a binder marked wedding. He grinned hoping on the couch handing it to Misaki).

Misaki: Wedding?

Usagi: I've kinda been planning our wedding ever since you proposed.

Misaki: (Grins), Usagi, this is so sweet. (He holds the binder to his chest).

Usagi: Don't you want to look at it?

Misaki: Yeah, but I just remembered, I have to go get my graduation stuff, and the suit.

Usagi: Want me to come?

Misaki: Can you drop me off at the school?

Usagi: Yeah, and I can get our suits.

Misaki: Perfect. When we come we can look at the binder.

Usagi: (Eyes lighting up), Good because I have lots of ideas.

Usagi: I can't believe they had a gown that small, I bet it could fit Suzuki-san. we should test it.

Misaki: No, this, along with our suits stay in the closet until Saturday, then you can give it to Suzuki-san. (He took the suits and the gown from Usagi hanging them in the closet, then took Usagi's hand grinning at him). Okay, so let's look at the binder, you've been grinning about it all day.

Usagi: I'm so excited. (He smirked leading Misaki to the office, once there he placed the smaller man on his lap then opened the binder.) Okay so for us I'm thinking purple and blue wedding suits, purple for me.

Misaki: Of course, it'll bring out your eyes.

Usagi: Something like this. (He pointed to a picture).

Misaki: That's amazing.

Usagi: And for you, this one.

Misaki: I love it.

Usagi: And everyone else can wear black or red.

Misaki: Okay, any ideas on cake?

Usagi: Lemon, but I want it on theme, maybe this one?

Misaki: Maybe.

Usagi: You don't like it?

Misaki: It looks good, but I know we won't have a lot of people, we might need something smaller.

Usagi: Right.

Misaki: Don't say it like that (Kiss cheek), We have time.

Usagi: I know, I just wanted you to like it

Misaki: I do, and honey, we don't have to agree on everything okay?

Usagi: It would just be easer if we did.

Misaki: I know.

Usagi: We agreed on everything for our house easily.

Misaki: But not everything, there was some stuff you thought wouldn't work, and that's fine.

Usagi: I loved must of the stuff, some things I thought didn't work, so we changed them.

Misaki: Right, and it'll be like this planning our wedding.

Usagi: Okay, right. So the ceremony, you want it outdoors?

Misaki: Right.

Usagi: It might be cold though so should the reception be indoors?

Misaki: Maybe, we can look into that the closer we get.

Usagi: Okay.

Misaki: OH, the theme is amazing!

Usagi: Really?

Misaki: Yeah, I mean we won't need that many seats, but I get the idea.

Usagi: Purple winter wonderland.

Misaki: I Love it. (He turns to face Usagi embracing him), I LOVE YOU, so much!

Usagi: I love you too. (Picks up documents), Now these need to go in.

Misaki: We're getting closer.

Usagi: I know.

Misaki: I can't believe it, we've come so far huh?

Usagi: Yeah. Sure have. (He hugged Misaki tighter taking in his smell, he loved ever single thing about him, he always wanted a person, and now he had one).