#my photography tumblr is much ignored

[beat-the-morning]

🖤Guitar Face || Hozier x Reader🖤

FULL FIC ON TUMBLR AFTER CUT || READ ON AO3

Rating: 18+ - Smut

Tags: Pre-Debut Hozier, vaginal fingering, finger sucking, vaginal sex, teasing, protected sex.

Summary: Andrew teaches you how to play guitar while you both try to ignore the very obvious and overwhelming sexual tension between you.

Word count: 5.4k

A/N: I’m back after a month of not posting (sorry lol) with a long fic to make up for lost time (yay) and to take our minds off of everything, really. When will I post my next fic, you ask? I don’t fucking know man, I’m just vibing. I do have a few ideas that I want to start, including a multichapter fic that will get written someday. Love you all, enjoy this pre-debut hozier fic💙

💙FULL FIC UNDER THE CUT💙

You needed a hobby, urgently. It was your second semester of your first year of university at Trinity College Dublin, and you had yet to find something to occupy your time that wasn’t studying, working, or just doing nothing with the group of friends that, despite your nervous and introverted nature, you had managed to form in your first semester. You were desperate for something new to do, a new skill or pastime to occupy you when all your friends were busy or simply when you felt like doing something other than hanging out with them.

The idea of learning guitar came to you after talking to one of your friends about your newfound need for a hobby, she mentioned that you had a great sense of rhythm and that you already really liked music, so why not pick up an instrument. She didn’t tell you to pick up guitar specifically, but it seemed like a good choice for learning in your spare time, and it’s not like you had the money to buy a keyboard or drums, much less a more classical instrument like a violin, a cello or a harp, and you already knew that you didn’t have the lungs for wind instruments.

You asked around your friend group if anyone had any suggestions for cheap guitars to buy, you got one that was moderately good and within your budget. You started to learn by yourself, the only thing was that you sucked, you barely understood the tutorials you found on youtube and didn’t even know if you were really doing it right, your fingers were sloppy and uncoordinated and you only angered yourself more and more with each note you got wrong. So, after two weeks and a half of frustration, you decided that maybe a guitar teacher wasn’t a bad idea, and that if that didn’t work you’d sell your guitar and pick up photography or something that didn’t require you to use your fingers as much.

It was Friday evening, and some members of Trinity Orchestra were having a small rehearsal/get together, and you knew your friend would be there since she was a pianist in the orchestra, so maybe she could help you learn guitar or at the very least find a teacher. You arrived at the get together when it was almost finished, you didn’t want to interrupt them, even if it wasn’t really a rehearsal, you felt out of place just by being there. Miranda, your friend, spotted you from her bench and beckoned you over to her, she’d been expecting you since you told her earlier that day that you’d go see her at the rehearsal, she was leaning on the closed piano, a half eaten bag of crisps sat on the cover of its keys. “I thought you’d come sooner, you missed the little concert.” She smiled.

“Nah, I’d rather not interrupt.” You smiled back, “anyway, what I wanted to talk about before you ran off today because of your horrible time manage skills-“

“-They’re not that bad, come on.” She pouted playfully, faking indignation.

“Bullshit.” You argued back, trying to hold in a laugh. “Now, do you know how to play guitar?”

“No, just piano, and the organ, kind of. Why?”

“I’ve been trying to learn how to play on my own but I can’t get the hang of it, I need a teacher or something.” You explained, trying to be quiet enough so that no one else would hear.

“Teacher for what?” A masculine voice asked from behind you, making you jump slightly in surprise. You turned around, a lanky guy with dorky glasses and a blonde fringe stood there, looking at you as he tried to guess who you were. “Have we met before?” He finally asked.

“I don’t think so,” you answered, a nervous smile on your face

“I’m Alex,” he smiled back to you, but his smile was more welcoming than anything else. You told him your name, and that you were a friend of Miranda, which prompted her to speak up.

“They’re trying to learn guitar,” she joined in. “Maybe you could help them?”

“Can’t, I’m drowning in coursework already, sorry,” Alex said earnestly, seeming genuinely sorry that he wasn’t able to help you learn how to play.

“Don’t worry about it, I’m sure I’ll find someone to teach me.” You assured him, relaxing a bit more now that you had spoken the slightest bit more to him.

“Andy could help you, though.” A smirk grew on his face, “he’s always looking for an excuse to not do his work.”

“Andrew’s a vocalist though isn’t he?” Miranda chimed in again.

“He does more things apart from singing, you know.” Answered Alex.

“I didn’t know he played guitar though, I’ve never seen him play it.” She argued.

“He does! He’s self taught though, so his has this weird way of playing where he-“

“Sorry, but, who’s Andrew?” You interrupted, needing some clarification as to who they were talking about.

“Right, you don’t know who he is,” Alex chuckled, “he’s that one over there.” He said, pointing over to a group of about five guys all chatting while standing around a table.

“Which one?” You asked, still not knowing who to look at.

“The tall one.” Alex and Miranda said in unison. Your eyes focused on him, a pale, lanky guy with dark, shaggy curls on his head and a 3 day stubble on his face and neck, he was at least half a head taller than the second tallest man in the conversation circle. He was smiling, his cheeks a rosy tone from how much he’d been laughing, his front teeth were slightly crooked from what you could see from a distance, and you noticed a pair of glasses in his left hand as your eyes trailed down his body, you assumed that they were his glasses with how he was holding them so close to his body. He was so cute, you thought to yourself, a bit of a nerd maybe but it’s not like you weren’t into it as well.

“Andy!” Alex’s call broke your train of thought, and maybe that was for the best, who knows where you were going to end up with those. Andrew turned to look at Alex, noticing Miranda sat on her seat, and then you, you could’ve sworn you saw him look you up and down as a small smirk formed on his face. Alex moved his arm to call him over, and he approached without hesitation, quickly walking over to the little group you were in.

Alex introduced you to each other and quickly explained your situation to Andrew, who agreed to teach you. You agreed on payment, how many times a week you’d meet, the whole thing, really, and then you exchanged numbers.

“If you want we can meet up tomorrow and we can start with the basics,” he suggested, putting on his glasses as he put your number in his phone. Fucking hell, he looked adorable with them on, you felt your cheeks heat up as you looked at him.

“Yeah, that’d be good,” you agreed without thinking, “I’ll send you my address and we can meet at my place if you want.”

“Sure,” he looked at you with a small smile. You decided on a time to meet and then went home for the night after saying goodbye to your friend.

You felt a nervous knot in your stomach as you laid down in your bed, the worry of making a fool of yourself in front of a cute guy was catching up on you. You shook those thoughts off, putting on some faint music before finally going to sleep.

You woke up the next day, looking at the clock on your bedside table only to find that it wasn’t actually morning, but past noon, almost 1pm in fact. You got ready for the day and had what could best be described as a big brunch before deciding to clean your apartment before Andrew arrived later in the day, something that you only remembered when you saw a message from him confirming that he had your address right. Why did you agree to this again? You cursed yourself as you cleaned up the small space you lived in, it was an attic converted into a studio apartment that was way too cheap for how big it was, but it’s not like you were going to complain.

Time passed as you finished cleaning your apartment, having just enough time to shower before Andrew arrived. You had just finished dressing up when your phone rang, you picked up to find Andrew on the other side of the line, asking you to open since the doorbell wasn’t working, so, taking your keys in your hand, you ran downstairs to open the front door for him. He was carrying a guitar case and what you assumed was a small amp, he wore a very simple outfit, a shirt and jeans with a brown leather jacket and some old tattered converse, but no glasses. “I like the jacket.” You said while guiding him towards the elevator.

“Thanks,” he smiled shyly, “I brought my electric guitar, I hope you don’t mind, my acoustic one has a broken string and I still need to replace it.”

“It’s fine, mine is electric too.” You smiled back.

You went into your apartment, he commented on the fact that it was a studio, and on the absence of a sofa. “The TV’s over there so I usually just put all my pillows on my bed and use it as a couch.” You explained, pointing out the TV on the wall next to the bed. Andrew laughed to himself, he mumbled something under his breath that you thought sounded like “that’s so fucking cute”. He sat on your bed, taking out his guitar and tuning it without even plugging it in to the amp.

You took out yours, tuning it as well with an app on your phone. You and Andrew talked for a bit, making jokes and breaking the tension before he explained the basics of guitar playing to you. You listened attentively and asked questions about the things you didn’t understand, he was a great teacher so far, and you could honestly listen to him speak for hours, his voice was lovely, no wonder Miranda said he was mainly a vocalist.

The time came to finally plug in the guitars, yours was already plugged to your amp, you just needed to turn it on, which you quickly did while Andrew set up his, he plugged the amp to the wall, grabbing the cable to plug it into his guitar, he wasn’t paying much attention to it though, his mind was somewhere else. While his head was, in fact, pointing down towards the guitar, his eyes were mostly looking up at you through his brows, using his curls as a shield so you wouldn’t notice him staring. His hand faltered, the jack circled the plug it was supposed to go in, making some magnetic noises come from the amplifier, you smiled at his dorkiness, finding it adorable. “Trouble putting it in?” You asked, not fully realising the other possible meaning of the question until it was already out of your mouth, he looked up at you with a quizzical look before you both burst into laughter at the question.

“I’m good, thanks,” he said between laughs, getting the jack into the plug once he finally stopped looking up at you. “‘trouble putting it in,’?” He echoed your words with a lovingly mocking tone, trying not to laugh again.

“I wasn’t thinking!” You tried to defend yourself while suppressing more laughter.

“Clearly,” he giggled.

The real, practical, lesson finally began, you spent the next hour and a half learning to play a couple chords and how to transition between them. It was hell, your hands were oddly shaky and very uncoordinated, so you asked for a break before you threw your guitar out the window. “Tea?” You asked, already thinking about making some for yourself so you could have an excuse to wander your apartment for a bit.

“Sure, I’ll have whatever you have.” Andrew nodded, standing up and stretching a bit and walking over to your bookshelf.

You went over to the kitchenette to put the kettle on, your thoughts wandering to how Andrew looked, he was so pretty, and you were definitely embarrassing yourself with your horrible guitar skills, but he had to have expected that, right? You did tell him that you knew basically nothing about playing guitar after all.

He walked closer to you, leaning on the kitchen island. “You’re not as bad as you told me you’d be yesterday, you know.” He said with a kind look in his eyes.

“I’m not?” You asked as you turned to face him.

“Yeah, I mean, your fingers are a bit uncoordinated and all but that’s just getting the hang of it.” He explained. “You picked up the chords and their positions on the neck of the guitar pretty quickly, though, that’s a good sign.”

“Oh, well that’s good at least,” you chuckled, “I don’t know if I’ll ever get the hang of it, though, I have horrible hand-eye coordination.”

“It can’t be that bad, come on,” he scoffed playfully, walking over to you and almost-sitting on the counter closest to you

“It is.”

“I think your hands are just fine, you just need to practise, and maybe learning guitar will help when you do other things with your hands, it did for me.” He winked, you felt your face heat up.

“What other things?” You tilted your head to the side as you smirked.

“Just… things, you’ll see what I mean.” He chuckled, he pressed his thumb into his palm. His eyes looked you up and down slowly, but you pretended not to notice.

“Oh I’m sure.” You laughed.

The water boiled and you made the tea, you lost the track of time as your conversation went on, it was ever so slightly flirty, just some comments here and there that made you both blush coupled with a few lingering touches. You’d be lying if you said that you didn’t want to do more than just learn guitar with him, but you didn’t want to be too forward, so you waited.

/#/#/#/

You met with Andrew for guitar lessons every other day for the next four weeks, slowly improving on your skill while also getting to know each other more and more, to the point that you’d hang out with him even if you weren’t practising, you’d gone to the pub with him and a few more friends a couple times and would just randomly message each other every so often throughout the day just to check on one another. It was nice, and, even if your crush on him had only gotten stronger as the days passed, you were glad to have a new friend. He was so sweet and just the right amount of dorky nerd that you couldn’t help but love him, you only hoped he felt the same way about you.

It was a Saturday evening, Andrew had been over at your apartment since lunch, you’d started the lesson right after he arrived at 1 and it was now 6:30pm, he’d been teaching you a song, or more so trying to. It wasn’t even a hard one, your hands just were not collaborating today and both you and Andrew were growing increasingly frustrated.

You were standing next to your bed while Andrew sat down on it, the guitar was strapped around you, you were considering making it against the ground in frustration. “You look angry, darling.” He pointed out, his expression unreadable.

“I’m not,” you lied, “just frustrated, I don’t know why I can’t get it right.”

“Maybe your hands are just tired, rest a bit and try again later.” He suggested.

“No.”

“The guitar won’t leave if you stop playing for a second, you know?”

“I just want to get this part right, just to hear how it sounds and then I’ll rest.”

Andrew scoffed, the smallest smirk forming on his face, he rolled his eyes before standing up and walking over to you, his frame towering over yours. “Let’s hear it then.” He ordered.

You swallowed air nervously, slightly intimidated by the combination of his height and the more strict and dominant tone his voice had taken. Your fingers moved on the guitar, clumsily playing the song and restarting it every time you messed up a note. After a few failed attempts, he moved behind you, grabbing the guitar even though it was still on you.

He pushed himself flush against your back, his hands playing the instrument as if you weren’t there. You felt the vibrations of the guitar against your abdomen and his body against your back, and, thanks to your height difference, you could perfectly feel his crotch pressing against your lower back. You felt your face heat up and a few whimpers escaping your mouth as he played, and he was definitely getting a bit into it as well, thrusting his hips into you as the song went on, the worst part was that you weren’t even sure if he was doing it because of the song or to rile you up, but that was the effect it was having anyway.

He stopped playing before he got to the chorus of the song, taking the guitar off you before he finally stepped away. “Heard it. Now, rest.” He instructed, throwing himself back on your makeshift couch.

“What the hell was that?” You asked dumbfounded, a nervous chuckle escaped you.

“Sorry, I just… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that, it was weird.” He mumbled, his eyes focusing on your pillows instead of on you.

“I didn’t think it was weird,” you stretched the truth lightly, you had thought it slightly weird when he did that, but you also couldn’t ignore the burning between your thighs and you needed to know if he was feeling the same way you were right now. “You could’ve just taken the guitar off me, though.”

“It wouldn’t have worked, you would’ve gotten mad at me.” He bit his lip to fight back a smirk. “I wasn’t really thinking, anyway, and you said you wanted to hear how it sounded so… yeah.”

Your eyes wandered to his crotch for a second, he looked like he was at least slightly hard. Quickly focusing back on his face, you giggled and threw yourself on the makeshift couch next to him, you laid on your side, looking at Andrew with a small, loving smile on your face.

“What’s the smile for?” He asked, turning to his side so he could face you as well.

“Nothing,” you continued to smile. “It’s just funny that you’re kind of beating yourself up about it when I actually kinda liked it.”

“Oh?” His eyes widened for a second as he scooted closer to you. “And what about it did you like?”

“I like how the guitar felt against me. The vibrations of it, you know? I play so slow that I don’t usually feel them like… that.” You bit your thumb lightly, trying to appear a bit more innocent so he wouldn’t guess what you were really thinking about.

“Yeah, they’re nice,” he looked at your lips as well, then scooted even closer. “Anything else you liked?”

“Well… I liked how you felt… against me.” You admitted, only to see Andrew’s smile widening. His hand moved to your cheek, silently encouraging you to keep going. “I liked how you were thrusting against me, it felt nice.”

“Just nice?” He teased, caressing your cheek.

“It was kinda hot, too.”

“I thought so too, maybe we could do something about it?” He suggested, his hand moving to your hip.

You nodded weakly, your lips parting ever so slightly. Andrew lunged in to kiss you, his mouth crashing against yours as you kissed him back passionately. Slowly he moved to be on top of you as you kissed, his right leg moved between yours, pressing against your core. Your hips moved against his legs, desperate for any kind of release. His tongue darted into your mouth, exploring as it pleased while your hands tangled in his shaggy curls.

You deepened the kiss, it became sloppier and more desperate as the seconds passed by, Andrew pulled back, a string of saliva still connecting your mouths to each other’s. His breathing mirrored yours, ragged and irregular even as you tried to calm down slightly. His glasses were slipping off his nose, so, as one does, you moved your hand from his hair and adjusted them, making him chuckle softly. “I feel like a fucking teenager.” He laughed, leaning in to plant small kisses on your jaw and neck.

“You’re twenty-two, not that far from it.” You teased while quiet moans escaped your lips.

“Shut up.” He laughed, his kisses on your skin turning more demanding. His hands snaked under your shirt, slowly pulling it off you until he could finally throw it on to the floor. He grabbed your breasts, moving his face between them before starting to kiss and lightly bite them, you arched your back into him, more moans escaping you.

“Fuck! Andy… please,” you moaned loudly, he hummed against your chest.

“What is it, baby?” He asked with a wicked smile, looking up at you through the rim of his glasses. You whimpered and rubbed yourself against his leg as a response, making him chuckle once more. “So needy… I’ve been wanting you for a while, let me at least play a little before I ravage you.”

“Play faster, I want you now.” You whined again, pulling him in to kiss him. He happily obliged, kissing you back while his hands made quick work of your jeans.

Your jeans and underwear quickly joined the growing pile of discarded clothing on your floor, leaving you completely bare. Your hands moved from Andrew’s hair as he pulled away from your mouth, instead trailing kisses down your neck and collarbone once more, your touch moved to the hem of his shirt, pulling at the cloth to try and pull it off him already. He quickly caught onto that and pulled his own shirt and undershirt off himself, uncovering his torso. He was still as lanky and thin as he was with clothes on, but he was a bit fuller than you had imagined, the slightest bit of pudge gathering on his abdomen. Your gaze turned him slightly shy, his cheeks reddening as he looked away for a second.

“I know this probably isn’t what you imagined,” he said sheepishly, a nervous tone in his voice, “I’m s-“

“You’re so pretty,” you interrupted him, still staring at his body.

“You really think so?”

“Yeah, I do.” You smiled, your hands grazed his skin. “You’re very hot, too.”

“Flatterer.” He smiled back, leaning in to kiss you again. You felt goosebumps forming on his skin the more you caressed him.

“I would never, I’m only saying what I think.” You kissed him back.

He hummed happily into the kiss, his hand travelling lower and lower on your body until it reached your core. He gently caressed it with two fingers, smiling darkly when he felt just how wet you were. Slowly, he played with your clit, making you whimper and buckle your hips against his hand, silently begging for more. He obliged, moving to push two fingers inside you and making you gasp at the intrusion, he slowly pumped them in and out, his thumb moving to play with your clit.

“Is this something that playing guitar helps with?” You teased while trying to suppress your moans.

Andrew chuckled, his fingers quickening. “Yes, actually.” He kissed along your jaw. “It helps a lot, makes it easier to fuck you.”

You moaned more, holding onto him like a lifeline as he played with you. His lips moved to your neck again, leaving passionate kisses and hickeys as he memorised every inch of your skin. His movements quickened even more, his thumb playing with your clit in a way that made your legs shake slightly, his other hand grabbed your hip, his nails digging into your skin. You felt the all-familiar burning-white desire in your lower abdomen, your whines got more and more high pitched until they were nothing more than needy whimpers.

Andrew chuckled, pulling away from your neck to look at your face as you came undone before him. “That’s it, let go for me,” he whispered softly, his free hand now moving up to brush your hair away from your face. “That’s it, good girl. Let me feel you, baby, please.”

You felt something snap within you at his words, pure pleasure running through you as you came on his fingers, covering them with your essence. He smiled at your blissed out expression, taking it in as he fingered you through your orgasm. Once it subsided he pulled out his fingers and licked them clean as you looked at him, a moan escaping him as he finally tasted you.

“Fuck, you’re delicious, I’m going to fucking devour you next time.” He growled.

“Why not now?” You teased breathlessly, still recovering from your orgasm.

“Because I might explode if I don’t put my dick inside you right now.” He teased back, reaching into his wallet for a condom. “Can I fuck you now, baby? Or do you need to recover a bit more first?”

“Now, please.” You begged without thinking.

Andrew smiled at your eagerness, taking off his pants and underwear to reveal his cock, it was as long as you thought, or hoped, it’d be, somewhere above average that was still enjoyable, but his thickness surprised you, he was wider than you’d imagined. You felt your mouth watering. “You’re staring.” He said firmly, rolling on the condom, “does it scare you?” He asked, his tone a mixture of dominance and genuine concern.

“No.” You smiled, opening your legs more. “I was just a bit surprised.”

“A good surprise, I hope.” He smiled back, grabbing your legs and pulling you closer to him. You chuckled at his words.

“A very good surprise, yeah.”

You reached out to touch him once again, his hands catching yours and pushing them to be above your head. He held them in place with his left hand while his right travelled to your thigh, lifting it ever so slightly as he positioned himself between your legs. His cock brushed lightly against your core, making you both whimper lightly at the feeling, then, slowly, he pushed in. Your gasp matched his moaning, soft and quiet enough that it was almost whispered, he was pushing in slowly, making sure it wasn’t painful for you. He bottomed out after a few more seconds, his movements stopping as he let you get used to his size. He leaned in to kiss you, a slow, loving kiss that had you melting into his touch even more.

You moved your hips after a few kisses, signalling Andrew to move. He happily obliged, slowly thrusting in and out of you. Your moans filled the room, making a symphony with his. “You feel so fucking good, baby, oh my god.” He practically whimpered into your ear, interlocking his fingers with yours. His other hand held tightly onto your thigh, his grip almost bruising as he lost himself in you. You shook your hand free from his, moving it to his hair along with your other hand to pull him in for a kiss, muffling your moans.

“Faster, please.” You begged between kisses, Andrew growled in response, letting go of all his restraint. His pace quickened to a brutal one, pistoning in and out of you without a care in the world. Your hands moved down to his back, your nails leaving scratches as you neared your peak just from the feeling of his cock inside you.

He straightened up, getting a better view of you, completely blissed out and moaning like crazy, sweat making some of your hair stick to your face. His hand caressed your cheek lovingly, his thumb pressing on your mouth to pry it open. “Open up, baby.” He ordered, and you obeyed without hesitation. His thumb moved inside your mouth, pressing on your tongue. “Suck.” He added.

And you did, sucking gently on his thumb as a lopsided smile grew in his face. He whispered soft praises as he fucked you, his thumb thrusting slightly in and out at a gentle pace to contrast the one of his hips.

He moved your leg with his other hand so your ankle would be resting on his shoulder, changing the angle in just the right position so his pubic bone would hit your clit every time he bottomed out. Your moans got louder, or as much as they could since your sucking of his thumb muffled most of the noise. Andrew moaned too, quieter, softer moans that could only be audible between your own, but you loved every single one you could hear. You felt his cock twitch inside you.

You felt yourself getting closer and closer to the edge, your own hand moving to your clit to give you the extra friction you needed. Andrew pulled his thumb out of your mouth and moved it to your clit before you could reach it on your own, flicking it rapidly as he moved your leg off his shoulder so he could lean in to kiss you again. You moaned into his mouth and he moaned into yours, both of you nearing your respective climaxes, his cock twitched more inside you, his thrusting becoming erratic and uncoordinated. You felt the pure, unadulterated ecstasy threatening to explode within you once more, your hands moving once more to Andrew’s hair as he kissed you.

“Come for me, baby, come on, let me hear you again pet.” He moaned, pulling back slightly so he could see your face as you came undone below him. “So fuckin’ pretty, come on, love.”

You came under him not long after, pure pleasure flowing through you as your body shook with your orgasm. But Andrew didn’t stop, chasing his own release as his thrusts became even more irregular than before, and, just as you were starting to feel the overstimulation taking over, he came, releasing his spent into the condom and stopping his movements almost completely, savouring the feeling of your walls around him. He moaned loudly, his head going back slightly as his eyes closed and his jaw slacked, you grinned slightly, recognising his current expression as the same one he did when playing a more upbeat guitar solo.

After a few more seconds, you both calmed down, and Andrew leaned in to kiss you once more, slowly and lovingly this time. You kissed back, your bodies still entangled with each other as you savoured the afterglow of your lovemaking. Carefully, and despite how much neither of you wanted that, he pulled out of you, detaching himself from you so he could take off the condom and throw it out. “I’ll be back in a second, stay put.” He murmured before giving you a quick kiss and walking towards your bathroom.

He came back not long after with a damp washcloth in hand, cleaning you up slightly before helping you sit up on your bed. “I should go to the bathroom,” you pointed out.

“Yeah,” he agreed, “go on, I’ll wait here for you.”

You smiled lovingly, getting up and into the bathroom, coming out of it a few minutes later after refreshing yourself. You found Andrew laying on your bed, having put his boxers back on while you’d been washing up. He smiled at the sight of you, opening his arms for you to cuddle into, and that you did, crawling into your bed and hugging him tight. He played with your hair as you cuddled, talking about random things before you decided to be a bit cheeky. “Did you know you have the exact same face when playing guitar that you do when you cum?”

“Shut up,” he laughed, “…do I really?”

“Yeah.”

“Is it at least a nice face or do I look like an idiot?” His face reddened ever so slightly.

“I think it’s a very pretty face, just like your normal one.” You assured him honestly.

“Thank god.” He laughed again, holding you tighter to him. “Can I stay the night?” He added, a hint of uncertainty and pleading in his tone.

“You better stay.” You smiled, nuzzling your face into his chest.

Andrew smiled back, burying his face in your hair and taking in your scent.

[boydepartment]

so cute - anton lee x reader

a/n: DONT LOOK AT ME RN…. okay i’m having a moment shut up i can’t sleep. this is completely self indulgent and writing for fun so whooooooops

warnings- none just fluff and goofy. idol! anton. photography major! reader. (i am not a photography major so pls um bare w me) THIS IS ALSO REALLY CLICHE SO I AM SORRY i also have no idea what tags to use :( so if you are on riize tumblr PLS HELP ME IN MY INBOX WITH TAGS

wc- 250-300

MASTERLIST

when you sat down after you ordered you got all your stuff organized. you had a plan to meet your friend to study together at a small but sweet boba shop. a lot of college students would come and go and half the fun of studying was procrastinating and choosing to people watch instead.

your friend was late and so you were left to fend for yourself. which was okay, it didn’t bother you. you got a little lost in thought and didn’t even notice the gaggle of boys walk in.

you didn’t even notice when the second cashier called up your order and you skipped over to pick it up. it tasted sweet and made you smile.

the way you set up your table looked really nice so you took a couple steps away from your chair to take a photo, not for class. just for fun.

your notes and laptop looked like those aesthetic posts on pinterest and the view outside the window was not the worst for a parking lot. you looked down at your phone and frowned, maybe the flash would help?

you went to get in position again when a guy totally bumped into you. sending both of you crashing onto the floor!

when you sat up you saw all his friends almost sprint out of the shop laughing, you looked down, eyes widening.

“i’m so sorry! here let me help you up!” you stood up and put your hands out. he was quiet and took your hands. you bent over and picked up his thankful pre-poked boba, nothing spilled thank goodness!

“are you okay?” you asked, handing his drink to him. it was a little hard to tell or read him as he was wearing a mask, there was only so much you could read with his eyes.

your head turned to the side trying to get an answer out of him. eventually he snapped out of whatever daze he was in. did this boy hit his head too hard?

“it was my fault! i was walking backwards while talking and i didn’t see you i’m sorry…” the boy was very soft spoken and it took you by surprise. a lot of people you met in college were a little outspoken.

you smiled at him, hoping to lighten the mood, “it’s okay it was an accident!”

“you fell pretty hard on your knees, are you okay?” he asked, noticing that they looked pretty scuffed.

“oh! i’m okay. don’t worry about it.” you went to grab your bag which softened the blow of your fall.

“is your phone okay? if it’s broken i can help pay for the damages…”

that was sweet of him…

you looked at your phone and saw the crack in the screen protector, “it’s a little cracked but it’s just the screen protector! it’s fine! if anyone asks i can tell them about this.” you laughed a little and looked at him again, “my friend’s gonna wish she wasn’t late…!”

you heard the boy laugh a little, “i still feel bad for tripping over you and ruining your photo, can i do anything to make up for it?”

“there’s no need to feel bad!” you said quickly- waving you hands back and forth, “again it’s totally okay. you should probably get back to your friends though… they kinda ran off.”

you saw him look outside the window, scoffing a little, “i’m going to choose to ignore them.”

this made you laugh, it was a total 180 from his voice, it was cute.

“i’m y/n. i figure since we’re having a conversation it’s appropriate to introduce myself, since you’re not just falling over me and dipping.” you stuck your hand out again.

he looked at your hand and shook it, “anton.” his eyes curved which told you he was smiling. cute.

“um… your friend still isn’t here… can i sit with you?”

you nodded, might as well, it wasn’t like you were studying. he happily took a seat next to you.

“you’re in college right?”

you nodded, “mhm! photography major!” you opened a file and scooted your laptop to him. anton looked through your photos almost amazed.

“i’m trying to put together my portfolio right now actually. i’m hoping i’ll get a job soon.” you explained, leaning your head on your palm.

he practically perked up at this, “my friends and i need a photographer for our next show!”

“show?”

“ummmmmmmmmm.” anton scratched his neck, “yes. show. music. yaknow….”

you smiled, “honestly, if it pays well, i’d love to.”

he looked at you and nodded, really enthusiastically. you felt pride bubble in you for someone being so impressed by your work to offer you a job.

“can i get your number to get the details?” you asked, unlocking your phone, he was cute and even if the job didn’t work out, maybe a date would. you could hear his phone buzzing rapidly.

anton nodded again and put his information in, “text me your name n stuff and i’ll answer i promise.” he stood up, “i really need to get back to my friends they’re blowing up my phone… even though they ditched me…”

you laughed again, “no problem. i’ll text you!”

“yeah!” he was walking away from you smiling when he ran into the door awkwardly. almost like the scene of a movie. it was so cute.

he was so cute.

[kbs-and-fds]

Yo, Welcome to my photography blog!

This is a photography project with a focus on older digital cameras sold before the mid 2000s. I've been working with these sorts of cameras since 2022, which grew from my interest in retro computers that I have had since 2020 or so. Here, I'll introduce you to my cameras, my computer rig, and try to convince you that this is a cool hobby.

General Q & A:

Whats in the name? - Kb refers to Kilobyte, all of the photos I take with these cameras only take up a little over 100 Kilobytes of digital storage per photo. FD refers to the physical media the photos are stored in, currently one camera uses floppy disks (FD), the other two use compact flash (CF) and smart media (SM) cards. unfortunately, their shortened forms do not rhyme and so they do not matter.

What can I expect from this blog? - amateur photography using old cameras, I guess. I'll say some nonsense below each photo but you're free to ignore it. I don't plan on reblogging anything here, so don't expect that. I am the star of this blog. me me me. I tend towards finding weird buildings/architecture, "liminal spaces", sunsets, and generally trying to see how well I can make a photo look like a blender render in a Kane pixels video. don't expect any consistency, though. the medium will remain the same but the vibes will absolutely fluctuate with my mood. I'll try and tag things correctly if it's off putting.

Are you a cool person? - I tend to be! I don't want this place to be alienating for anybody but assholes who don't deserve to see the stuff I do. being a tumblr blog, I follow a lot of the standard stuff. jerks are not welcome and I'm not gonna give you the pleasure of an argument if you do turn your head round these parts.

who are you? - trans pan girl. takes pictures. listens to Femtanyl. much unlike Peter Parker.

My Cameras

Mavica FD-7

released in 1997, this was the second of Sony's "Digital Mavica" line of cameras. it records photos of around 50Kbs in size to a standard 3 1/2" floppy disk. it has some standard features like a manual focus wheel, 10x optical zoom, and exposure control. I haven't found a strict source but I believe this camera is less than one megapixel. I actually have a few different Mavica cameras (a fd-71/75/83/85/87 and a cd-1000) but they aren't different from the fd-7 enough to justify being used often. I'll make note on individual posts if I use 'em at all.

Kodak DC220

released in 1999, with a quality of exactly one megapixel the DC 220 is a weird little thing. it has custom software, connects to a computer via com ports with a transfer speed of ~11,000 bit/s. (roughly 30-60 seconds per photo in my experience) you can add custom text to your photos in the cameras built in software, and attach custom audio to each photo. it is a pain in the butt to get working, but it's quirks make it worth the frustration.

Olympus E-10

made in 2000 with a quality of a whopping four megapixels, the Olympus E-10 is the newest addition to my collection, and possibly the nicest camera I'll ever own. it's a fixed lens DSLR camera capable of 4x zoom, you can easily adjust the aperture and exposure on the fly, it's photos tend to be a whole 100kb in size (1/10th of a megabyte!) and to be entirely honest I have no idea how to use it. but I will eventually!

My Computer

I try to use all era-appropriate tech to transfer photos and do any edits, this is the computer I do all that processing on! its a Dell Optiplex gx1- the daddy of pretty much any computer used in public schools (Chromebooks don't count) It's got a Pentium 3 CPU clocking at 500MHz, 512mb ram, running windows ME. it has all the original Kodak DC220 software installed, and I can't really access the Kodak's photos any other way. I've also got a few other weird bits attached to it -an HP sketch pro cad tablet and an external data cartridge SCSI device. both work, but I don't really bother to use them, they just look neat.

that's about it. have a good one! thanks for reading this all, if you did.

[shalomniscient]

you're so soooo right with ei being badly written, especially in her quest. the first time i saw her drip marketing and such i was extremely hooked, like oh we have a potential evil character (not really) who's morally grey, i mean she stole people's vision, then hoyo decided to turn our girl into a shut-in neet waifu *sigh ei spent 500 years in plane of euthymia mediating, and just after like, a few hours with the traveller, she already dropped her whole belief of 500 years and that made me mad mad. like you said, if she and traveller had a deep, meaningful talk about grief and their siblings, maybe ei's decision would be more acceptable. at least to me :( all of this is my point of view tho <33 since you write analysis very accurate to characters i wanted to share my small thoughts with you. hoyo did our girl dirty so much hshshs

i was an og raiden enjoyer alright like i had her as my wallpaper as my pfp on discord tumblr hell even fucking pinterest. my genshin pinterest board caption is still me flexing the fact i pulled c2 raiden on release. i LOVE her, she is truly so special to me i mained her for years and i still use her in abyss. but i physically can't ignore bad writing when i see it, and ei girl you have so much of it. i agree with your point where ei seemed to change her ideals so quickly. even if miko and traveler managed to break into the euthymia, and the traveler managed to awaken all the visions, that still seems ??? so weak of a reasoning ??? i'm glad they addressed this somewhat in ei's confusing as hell 2nd story quest, where even her own puppet turns on her for changing her ideals so quickly lmao also another hoyo fumble with ei... i remember this so vividly because i was SO disappointed, but at the start of her first story quest where we're about to take her out on the """date""" we take a picture first, and i remember thinking "holy shit, this is so cool. pictures are a form of eternity too, maybe ei will find an appreciation or passion for photography as an instrument of eternity" but no. instead we just. take a picture of her then go to the bookstore and have dango milk and beat the shit out of some dude in a duel. like be so fr man

[vinetae]

Can I please ask for a neighbour jimin who gets intensely attracted to y/n, they flirt a lil here and there and due to a guy's visit he gets extremely possesive and claims his ownership 💦🥵

“You’re cute when you’re angry.” Your eyes lull to the back of your head at his shameless attempt. 

“And you’d be really cute with this knife shoved in your thick head.” He laughs, raising an eyebrow up in questioning. 

“So you think I’m cute?”

You scoff, eyes rolling. “Not in the slightest.” He hums, tilting his head before following you into your room. 

“But you said really, which means that I was just cute before. So therefore, you think I’m extra cute.”

Smile - PJM

____________________

Genre: Neighbours!Jimin x Neighbors!Reader, (Ft. Love interest Taehyung)

Word Count: my guess... 12K ?

Warnings: Lying, accusations, broken friendships, cunillingus, f.masturbation, wet dreams, pinning, vaginal fingering, games under the table, exhibitionism, voyeurism, light ass play, dirty talk, hurt no comfort (I'm so sorry Tae Tae), use of the word 'faggot', cursing, harsh language, foul language. Camera play, videotaping of sexualactivities, pornographic described photos sessions. Possessive!Jimin, Yandere!Jimin, sub!reader, usage of 'wifey' terms and Y/n being a helpless damsel in distress. Y/n being innocent, and Jimin loves it lol. Jimin coerces Y/n into a nude photography shoot. Jimin is VERY VERY sneaky and charming.

A/n: this got lost in my Tumblr drafts which I don't use anymore. I'm so sorry, anon! Please forgive me 🙏🙏🙏🙏💜 I wanted to post this to remind myself to write part 2 when I get the chance. To give you guys a sneak peak I guess? I just gotta write the steamy.. 🥵

.

.

You take in a deep breath, nodding your head in assurance. “Thanks again for the help, guys! Really appreciate it.” They’re quick to ignore the comment, brushing past your shoulder quite roughly. You silently groan, rubbing at the sensitive skin before turning back around to meet their gazes. 

“Total’s 120 for the three hours plus lift.” He gruffs, jotting down the amount on the piece of paper. You nod, feeling the jolt of him shoving the little slip into your grip. 

“Have it paid by next Tuesday.” He turns around, picking the large toolbox up off your oak flooring before exiting. You rush over, leaning in the door to thank them once again but they don’t return the same attitude. 

You huff, folding your arms at the annoyance. Blowing a piece of hair from your view, your eyes scan the loitered hallway full of your things.

Your eyes follow a dark shadow across the corridor, waving at the young man. A black ball cap covered his face, along with a darkened gray mask. His clothes had resembled ones that someone would sleep in to keep warm in the cold winter days. Black sweatpants and sweatshirt to match. 

Your arm flies in the air, waving as he passes by. “Hi!” 

He brushes your arm, moving past your body before walking into the doorway of his apartment. 

“Hmph. Rude much..” You gruff, taking in a breath.

 “Alright..”  You lean down to lift the heavy box. It had been quite heavy, until suddenly the weight felt light as a feather. You lean to the side to look past the large cardboard box,  seeing a young flash you a bright smile. 

“Here, I’ve got it.” He adds, pushing his way past the rest of your things before turning around for guidance. 

“Oh uh- just set it down in the livingroom.” He nods, placing the large box down before walking back to the hallways. Your hand catches his shoulder before he continues. 

“Uhm.. who are you?” 

He flashes a quick grin before lifting another box. “I’m part of the moving crew. Sorry my dad’s such a..” 

“Pain in the ass?” He laughs at the joke. 

“Exactly.” His hand extends out, a boxy smile plasters his expressions. “My name’s Kim Taehyung.” You nod, shaking his hand with the same enthusiasm. You take a glance down the hallway, frowning. 

“Won’t you miss your ride?” He shakes his head, while hoisting two boxes into his grip.

“I drove here myself. I’m just working as a mover for the summer. Just some extra cash I can show off.” He winks before taking the boxes back into your apartment. You chuckle, watching as he makes quick work of the boxes that would’ve taken you hours to finish moving. 

“Oh- How rude of me!” You yelp, running to the kitchen, peaking out from the fridge’s door to call out to him. “Would you like anything to drink?” He sets the box down, lifting the hem of his shirt to wipe the sweat from his forehead. His permed fluffy, puppy-like hair had floofed up even more from Korea’s hot summers. 

“Water please?” He asks. Your body freeze at the sight. Eyes trailing down the plains of his torso, watching as his six-pack tenses with each move of his joints. The lump in your throat felt as thick as a golf ball. 

“Uh- yes. Of course!” You laugh it off, trying to hide the nervousness in your tone. You’re quick to make work of his water -like there was much to do anyways- before you set it on the coffee table he’d already placed down. His sweating body takes a seat on your hardwood floors, legs crossing in manner. 

“Thank you” He glances up through the glass, flashing you a bright smile. You plop down onto the edge of your sectional, taking slight-

Who were you kidding? 

You’re watching this Taehyung guy drink water like it’s the best telanovela you’d ever seen. 

He downs the glass quickly, setting it quietly on the coffee table in front of the two of you. “Anything else I can do?” He questions, internally smirking at the way you’d been staring at his adam’s apple for the past minute or so. 

You shake your head, pulling yourself from the rabbit hole of dirty thoughts. “I think that’s it.” You reach out to your purse, rummaging through the tiny folds of tightly laced fabrics before taking a glance up. “How much do I owe you?” 

He smiles, pulling out his phone to calculate the total. His eyebrows knit together, watching as his face intensifies on the numbers. After a few minutes of torture, he contuines, sliding the phone back into his pocket. 

“Sixty-nine dollars, or.." He eyes you up and down, lips trailing out to pad across his bottom lip. "you.”

Your eyebrow quirks at his weird statement. He shakes his head, chuckling nervously.

“No I mean- Ah fuck.. I’m not good with pick up lines, am I?” His hand reaches back to rub at the nape of his neck, acting as if he’s shying out of asking his highschool date to the prom. A few seconds go by before you get it. Your face immediately flushes. 

“No- Oh my God, I’m so dumb- Sorry! My Korean’s still a little wonky, you know?”

You smile, trying to hide the embarrassment behind your laugh. He chuckles at the irony. 

“But your total would be sixty-nine. Just saying.” You let out a sharp laugh, shaking your head. “No way.” He pulls his phone from the pocket of his khakis, showing the blue an black screen which indeed had sixty-nine calculated in for about an hour. 

“Damn.” He chuckles, nodding. “It’s a sign, right?” His eyebrows raise, flashing a cheeky grin towards you. 

“Oh, for sure~” You tease, reaching into the pouch of your purse, pulling your phone from its concealment. 

“How about this? I pay you, and ask you out?” You watch as a little hue of pink flushes his round cheeks. “Ask me out? Hey, I was the one to ask first.” You laugh, nodding. 

“Yeah but you sucked at it.” He pouts but eventually agrees. “Yeah.. okay fine.” He stands up, getting a little more confident. “So how about this Saturday? 8:30?” You nod, rising to meet his level. Your hand reaches out, handing him the correct amount of money, as well as your number written on the piece of paper. 

“Sounds like a date.” He smiles like a little kid in a candy store before making his way quickly out the door. Before you hear the lock click, he’s quick to rush back in, using the door as support. 

“Wait! What’s your name?” You giggle, leaning down to start unpacking one of your boxes. 

“It’s Y/n.” 

.

.

You let out a deep breath, setting the huge load of laundry down onto the floor, admiring your hard work. You’d gotten almost everything done in just a few hours, since it hadn’t been a huge apartment. Now, all you had to do was wash your clothes. 

You lean down, throwing your darks in first before setting the machine’s timer. 

[Error]

“What?” You groan, pressing the button again, just for the little alarm to beep at you again. 

[Error]

“Ugh!” You bend down more, examining if there had been anything wrong with the machine. Once you knew it wasn’t it’s compartments, you rise back up to meet with the annoying error signal again. 

“Okay.. try this again.” You inhale calmly, trying to remember your breathing techniques you’d learned from the free month of yoga you’d signed up for. 

“Breeeathe, Y/n. It’s just a little-”

[Error]

“Why you piece of shi!-” 

A hand comes to bang in front of your face as you fumble back at the sudden noise. Your eyes glance over to your left side, watching as the man who’d hit the machine had been reaching down to take his things out of the lower machine. He glances up, the black face mask hides any kind of emotion he might’ve shown. 

“It gets stuck sometimes. Gotta hit it.” He says monotony, lifting his charcoal gray basket to his chest. You flash a quick smile, bowing.

“Thank yo-” 

He was gone. 

.

.

Jimin lets out a sigh, throwing the bag of laundry down onto his duvet cover. Shuffling over to the computer, plops down into his gaming chair. He slides his headset over, turning on his PC. The screen flashes a few times before loading up his game. 

“Heyyyy it’s J-man!” His friends chant on the other line. He scoffs, quick to choose his gun and character. 

“Yeah yeah, don’t shit your pants, alright? I’m only gonna play one round.” They all laugh at that, echoing through the mics. “Jimin and only one round?” 

“Oh please, his girlfriends beg to differ!” The two boys snicker over the lines, making Jimin groan in frustration. One thing his stupid mates had said caught his ear though. 

“You hear about the new girl who died in Chun-dae complex?” 

“No shittt bro. Wait- Jimin isn’t that where you live?” 

Jimin’s body freezes. His mic goes silent, as he calms his labored breaths. His finger hovers over the mic button before finally replying. “Yeah.” Everyone goes crazy. 

“Oh shiiit. Bro do you know what happened?”

“Did you know her?

“Did you fuck her is the question, gentleman.” They all agree, waiting for his response. He groans, eyes lulling to the back of his head before pressing the T button. 

“Of course I didn’t know her. It was all over the news, though. Cameraman and news channels cleaned every inch of her apartment.” They all ‘ooo’ in curiosity. 

“Hah, knowing him he probably was the one to kill the poor thing.” 

“Hey, Ji-bom, that's not funny. My sister knew her.” 

Ji-sung scoffs over the mic before replying. “Oh yeah? Only ‘cause they were scissoring each other the night before, isn’t that right?” 

“Ayoo, Ji-bom chill man.” Kwang chimes in at the banter. Jimin scoffs at his idiot teamates. 

“I’m just sayin’. Fucking faggot got what she deserved, dude.” 

“Alright alright that’s enough guys-” 

“That’s enough, both of you.” Jin barks back at the two, silencing the chatroom. 

“Thank you, hyung. Anyways, Jimin isn’t there a new girl moving into her apartment?” 

“Oooo yeah. Go check her out. I heard she just moved to Korea, too.” 

“Foreigner?” Jungkook chimes in.

 Jimin lets out a sigh, questioning why he’s even friends with any these idiots. He picks up the mic piece, making himself as clear as he can before answering. 

“I’ve already seen her.” He scoffs, spinning quietly in his chair to face the wall. 

“Ain’t much.” He retorts, clicking out of the call before throwing his wireless headphones to the side. 

His eyes take a glance to the organized white board decorated meticulously with red and blue strings, the woman’s face in the center had made a smirk creep up his face. 

.

.

“Oh fuck-” You curse, watching as the little orange from your net rolls from the paper bags and down the stairs. You whines, setting the little bags to the floor, following the rolling fruit. 

“Come back here you little-” Right before you’re able to catch the run away, a soled shoe props itself ontop of the orange. Your eyes flash up, seeing the same man from earlier towering over your figure. 

“Oh- thank you..” You bow to reach the object, but he’s quicker to pick it up. The black hat had been capped over his head, revealing the flat of his glistening forehead. His milky skin gleams in the floruescent lights, as he observes your orange like an artist admiring their work of art. 

“It’s gone bad.” He comments, throwing it up the stairs as you both watch it land in the space of your bag. Perfectly sitting ontop of the thin paper container. 

“Wow..” You awe at his skills, turning around to thank him once more. His black mask is pulled down to reveal a set of large and cherry red lips. A smirk plasters his face. 

“Why didn’t you just take the elevator?” 

You take a look down, trying to remember why you had gone this was in the first place. 

“I.. Don’t really remember.” He hums, leaning against the white stair railing for support. 

“You’re the girl from room 13, right?” You nod, flashing him a bright smile. 

“Yep! I think you’re..” 

“Room 14.” 

You nod sharply, sticking your hand out. His eyebrow raises at the gesture.

“Oh right.. Korea.” You cheek flush with a red tint, as you slowly go to retract your hand. However, he’s quick to take it in his grip, giving you a firm shake. His grip had pulled you closer in proximity, your body almost flushed against his completely. You could see the little twinge of gold specks peaking from his chocolate irises.

Where had your voice gone all of a sudden??

“I..I- Uhm.. My name’s Y/n.” You watch the corner of his mouth tug upwards at your stutter. 

“Jimin.” 

.

.

It had now been the second day of moving in. You decided to go explore the complex a bit more, wanting to know its history further than what the website had briefly explained. 

Your feet click against the old marbled flooring, and echoed clatter sounds through the empty rooms. Your head swished back and forth, taking a few glances at the passing doors on your way to the elevators. 

That’s odd. 

You’d been told that this apartment was constantly having people coming in and out all the time, but you haven’t seen a single soul since the guy in the stairwell. 

You shake your head, pulling yourself from the rabbit hole of your silly thoughts. You chalk it up to a weird coincidence. You’d moved in on a Wednesday anyways. Everyone was probably at work when you had tried greeting them. 

You make your way past the set of elevator doors, pressing the button to make quick work of getting downstairs. 

“Hold it!” You hear someone call out, reaching out to pause the elevator doors form shutting completely. He sighs, bowing to thank you as much as the boxes in his arms could. He sighs, taking in deep breaths. 

“Ah, thank yo- Y/n?” Your head cranes to the side, seeing Taehyung’s boxy smile and permed, curly locks flowing in the elevator’s A/C.

“Taehyung? What are you doing back here?” He smiles, flashing you a thousand-watt grin. “I’m helping an ajuma switch rooms.” He leans down, lowering his voice to a hushed whisper. 

“She said she hates hearing the little ghost girl running across her ceiling..” Chills spiral down your back like a mattress coil. He chuckles, hitting your back gently. 

“I’m kidding! Well, I mean she did say that so.. I guess I wasn’t kidding..” He shrugs, fixing the collar of his Frank Sinatra hoodie. He continues to keep the conversation going, trying to explain himself. 

“Would it help if I said she was diagnosed with schizophrenia?” Your eyebrows knit in fear. A cold rush flows through your blood. 

“Not really..” He pouts, lip peeking out to quiver. 

“I’m sorry.. I didn’t mean to scare you, promise!” You finally let go a bit, flashing him a slight smile. 

“It’s okay.” He nods in excitement, glancing around the room awkwardly before turning back to catch your attention. “So how are you liking your new apartment?” He questions, rocking on the balls of his heels, clasping his hands behind his back. You let out a sigh, slightly nodding. 

“I like it. I wish people were a little more friendly, though..” He nods, a compassionate look plastering his face. “Yeah.. it’s got a lot of old people in it, so can’t really ask for the nicest of treatments.” You sigh, nodding at the truth. 

“But hey! It’s got a nice view, huh?” You giggle at his excitement, agreeing. “Indeed. And I’ve got one kinda nice neighbour?” He flashes you an adorable boxy smile. “Really? Who?” 

“He said his name was like- Jimin or something.” 

The whole atmosphere feezes. Taehyung’s once bouncy and energetic vibe fades, and a dark, mysterious look plasters his face. 

“Y/n..” He turns to face you, taking your hand in his gently. “Promise me you’ll stay away from him, alright?” Your eyebrow knits in confusion. 

“What? Why? He seemed okay.” He shakes his head quickly. “I don’t know much but- he’s got a not so nice reputation around here..” The elevator dings, as the doors slides open. He sighs, taking the boxes back into his arms before turning to give you one last piece of advise. 

“Just- stay away from him.”

.

.

“Come on you freaking- Ugh!” You’d been trying for the past two hours to hook up the wifi and ethernet cables so you can watch Netflix, but you lost the instructions packet while moving your things around. You groan out, throwing the screwdriver to the side in frustration. 

You rise before walking out of your apartment door, as Taehyung’s voice rings in your mind. 

“He’s got a ‘not so nice’ reputation around here..”

“Just- stay away from him.” 

Your head shakes the thoughts away as you ring the doorbell. 

A few minutes after, the door starts to unlock, cracking open to reveal a messy haired man standing in the doorway. 

“Uh- Jimin?” You ask, wondering if it had been the same man you’d see earlier. He hums, leaning on the doorframe for support. The fuzzy blanket wrapped around his small frame had made him look completely harmless. 

Which only fueled your motives. 

“Uh- Hi. We met in the stairway earlier and-”

“Ah yeah.” He yawns, face resembling one of a little baby puppy waking up from it’s naptime. “Y/n, right?” You nod, happy that someone had remembered who you were. 

“Yes, that’s me haha. Uhm so- I was wondering if you knew anything about wifi cables?” His eyebrow raises at the question, but continues on. 

“Yeah. Why?” You flash a large grin, putting on your best ‘I’m a woman, I need help, please help me’ look. 

What? 

It’s worked before. 

“Great! I’ve just been struggling with hooking up my wifi cables to the outlet and it’s really frustrating and-” He cuts you off with a chuckle. “That’s the easiest thing setting up in the apartment.” You huff, but continue. 

“Well if it’s so easy, then it won’t take you long at all.” He chuckles, arms crossing over his chest as you’d taken notice of his more aware self stealing ‘sleepy’s’ spotlight. 

“What’s in it for me?” He teases, flashing a cheesy grin. You nod, trying to think of something a man would want. 

Other than that..

“Uhm- I could make you dinner?” He thinks for a second, before opening the door all the way. 

“Alright. Just lemme grab a shirt.” 

.

.

Jimin’s eyes take a few double takes around Y/n’s apartment. The tiny couch tucked in the corner, covered in plastic wrapping and dusty blankets. The cream colored high walls stood twice his size, and really? That was the only beautiful part about living in these shitty apartments. 

“So where’s the cable?” He questions, head craning a full 180 to observe the lack of decorations. She flashes a small, embarrassed grin while pointing to a separate selected room. His fingertips graze the surface of her marble countertops. Lifting his finger, he examines the light dusk bits his skin had picked up. He’s quick to wipe the dirt on the fabric of his jeans. 

“You know, the landlord said that the internet cable would be in the mainroom but-” 

“What the fuck..” His feet stop behind yours, observing the cramped space of your bathroom. 

He watches your nails reach behind your head, scratching as you let out a small chuckle. “Yeah..” 

He scoffs, eyes taut on the little internet box shoved on a low rickety shelf above the toilet. You bend down to meet his level, waiting for his next move. “Makes sense on why they knocked off a few bucks..” You laugh nervously, eyebrows knitting together in frustration. 

He lets out a short chuckle, reaching around to pull the plug. He rises to his feet, arms crossing over his chest. “What a bunch of idiots..” He mumbles, sighing. 

You rise as well, glancing up at his frustrated figure. “Anything I can do?” He stops running his hand through his black toussels, taking a glance at your way. 

“Yeah.” He comments, bending back down to reach into his toolbag. 

“Got any beer?”

.

.

You take in deep breath, knee tapping anxiously against your hardwood floors. You’d been waiting outside the bathroom for the past ten minutes. He offer to relocate the router so it wouldn’t be a future firehazard. You happily agreed, trusting his insticts. 

He was the man, anyways. 

Your nails had almost been cleaned right off from the tightness of your jaw nervously chewing on the poor things. Every few minutes you’d heard a sigh of frustration or mumbled curse as he’d been removing the wires from inside your walls. 

“Hey, wifey,” He yelps out. You’re quick to make your way into the small bathroom. 

“Need anything?” Your jaw drops at the sight. His tanned skin had glistened with a sheet of sweat, jet-black locks greased and pulled back to sit slick against the crown of his head. A few dry and perfectly good stragles make their debut on the slick of his forehead. His white shirt you’d seen his thrown on prior to coming over was drenched making the thin material completely see-through. 

He gripes, rising to his feet once more. His large hands held the tiny router in one, with wire cutter in the other. He chuckles, watching your eyes blow as wide as cartoon characters. 

“Might wanna close that mouth if you’re not gonna put it to good use, darling.” 

That-

Didn’t help. 

You’re quick to pull yourself from the train of spiral thoughts, nodding at his commentary. He lets out a short laugh, pushing the little router into your chest. You yelp a little ‘oof’, gripping onto the device. 

“What.. am I gonna do with this?” You ask, watching him packing the things in his toolbag, slinging it over his shoulder before replying with a smirk. 

“Replace it. Piece of crap is older than my mom's kimchi recipe.” He reaches upwards, stretching the length of his elongated spine. You silently gawk at the peak of skin underneath his shirt. He twists around, giving you a little smirk. 

“Dinner ready yet?” You shake your head, pointing at the clock on the wall. He glances over, reading the time set. 

6pm.

He scoffs, throwing his bag onto the floor to lean up against the edge of your little centered table. 

“Besides,” You add, finally having found your voice once more. You watch one of his darkened eyebrows quirk at the comment. 

“I asked you to fix it.” 

“Yeah?”

“You didn’t fix it.” 

He chuckles, leaning further into the table’s edge. “Can’t fix something I don’t have.” 

You pout, crossing your arms to match his. “Why don’t you have it?” 

“You don’t get it, do you?” He asks, leaning towards your direction to lazily tower over your figure. You back down, feeling his intense aura consume yours like a little bunny caught by the big bad wolf. 

“You need a new router, the other one won’t connect to the complex’s main central.” You watch his narrowed eyes soften upon seeing your intimidated ones. He sighs, carding a hand through his greasy locks, flipping his chin up to shake the entirety of his head. 

“Hardware store’s closed for today already. You can check tomorrow. If you order it online, it’ll take up to a week to have it shipped.” You huff, annoyed with the cursed thing. 

His smirk toys with your aggravated posture. 

“I don’t supposed you have an extra one?” You plead, flashing your most intense puppy-like eyes.He smirks, shaking his head.

“Nope, sorry, Wifey.” Your eyes flash up to meet him. 

“What’s with that?” His shoulders shrug, an innocent look splays his sharp features. You groan, walking away to tug the roots of your hair in frustration. You twist around, throwing yours hands down. 

“There’s NOTHING you can do?” He lifts from counter, slowly coasting his way to stalk your frame. He towers over you, a smirk plasters his features. 

“There’s alot I can do. But for that?” His finger points to the little old device on the counter where you’d placed it. 

“No can do.” 

You take in a deep breath as he makes his way to jump onto the counter’s surface, feet swinging back and forth like a little kid. He watches your features slowly fade from hopeful to hopeless in a matter of seconds. Your eyes quicken over the area of your apartment, as if he could almost see the little gears trying to push their way to start. 

After a while of pacing and panic, you’d just settled on giving into fate. “Alright.” You sigh, slowing your paces to a stop. Your eyes glance up, seeing him propping himself back on the heels of his palms, an amused smirk paints his face. 

“Still up for dinner?” 

.

.

“Not very wifely of you, Y/n.” He comments, stuffing a face full of the hot rice you’d ordered for him. 

“I’m not trying to be wifely, Jimin.” He chuckles at that. 

You’d settled for just ordering in. So here you sat, using the flat of your old couch as a backrest as the two of you sat on the hardwood floor eating sticky rice and crunchy chicken you’d gotten from the place across from your apartment. 

“I like that.” Your head cranes, giving him a questioning look.

“Like what?” 

He grins, taking another bite of his largely portioned rice bowl.

“When you say my name.” 

You chuckle, clicking the remote to find something to entertain this kind of awkward situation. You feel him shift a bit, crossing his legs to get into a more relaxed position. 

“So,” he starts, digging in the little to-go box for the last of his rice. His voice strings with casualty and familiarity which he laced to ease this into a more comfortable atmosphere for the both of you. 

“Why this shithole?” You chuckle, reflecting back on the selection process you’d forced yourself to go through. 

“It was kind of an emergency situation. I wanted to come here for animation and graphic designs.. But, I had to move out quickly.” His eyebrow quirks at the questioning sentence. 

“Why?” 

You sigh, fingertip grazes over the ridges of your hardwood floor. Should you really be letting an almost stranger know so much about your personal affairs?

Well, you two were neighbors now. 

“Stuff just got too complicated in my house.” He nods, not wanting to pry on more of the obvious still fresh wound. His throat clears, as he begins clearing your table of the plastic wrappers and trash. 

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I got kicked from my own house.” You chuckle, head turning to face him. “Really? What could you possibly have done?” He laughs, leaning back against the couch’s front. 

“What? Don’t think I’d get into trouble?” Your head shakes at his question. “Frankly, you look like a cinnamon roll.” He chuckles, taking a sip of his soju. 

“Oh really?” He leans in further, the pad of his lips brushes your ear’s shell. Hot breaths roll past your heating cheeks. His voice is low and sensual now. 

“I mean- you just like blacks, right?” He chuckles at that. He reaches out, ruffling your hair between his fingers.

“You’re cute.”

.

.

“Oh fuck..” He moans out, hand palming himself over the clad of his boxer-briefs. His body, slung forward, propped up to leave the back of his chair lonely and cold. His chin tilts upwards, eyes focused on the bright of his screen. 

“Mmmm just like that, baby” He groans, free hand gripping the edge of his chair, knuckles hueing to a white tint at the pressure. He watches the woman drop the fabrics of her remaining clothing items. Her pink, basic underwear slipped from the waist of her tight skin. 

“Yeahhh” His heavy moans pant at the sight of the beautiful woman exposing herself for the camera. His palm wrapped around the base, a slow pace up and down the length of his throbbing cock. His sweaty bangs come to fly forward before sticking to the damped of his forehead. His mouth stifles sounds that would be a one-way ticket to hell.

Oh, how he wished she'd caress her breasts.  

His eyes focus on the way her hair falls out of its messy bun to cascade down the beautiful plains of her back. A small, cursive tattoo sits atop the nape of her neck. The little decoration only furthers him deeper into his state of temporary euphoria. 

The soap slides down her body, grime and grease being removed from even the most difficult crevasse. Suds and white foam paint a thin sheet over the bare of her entire frame. His hips slightly raise out of control at the sight. The red and angered tip of his cock leaks a thick string of pre-cum from his slit. 

Her hand reaches out to steady herself, making sure she doesn’t slip from the sudsy shower floor. Her long, manicured nails made him wish she’d ruin his back with them. Red scratches running up along the plains of his shoulder blades only edged him on further.

His balls tighten, warning him of his nearing end. He groans out, leaning back against his gaming chair as he lifts a leg to prop up on the desk, showing the invisible camera on his computer all of his lengthy and girthy glory. After a few minutes of slowed strokes, his balls ached with pain. 

He loved it.

His hand wrapped around his cock picks up the pace. Body practically leaping from his seat. 

“Fuck!” He moans out, lips dropping to form an O-shape as a string of hot cum shoots onto the towel that he’d held to his tip right before blowing his load.

He clicks a few buttons, watching as the camera zooms in at the perfect time. She’d finished up, exiting the shower to wrap a warm and fuzzy looking lengthy towel around her fitted body. The steam had fogged the glass mirror above the sink, but the camera still stood clear as fresh water. 

The cameraman had cleverly sprung for the fog-avoidant cameras.

He, being the cameraman..

.

.

You reach over, answering the incoming call that had rung for the past few seconds. You hug the portion of your towel to your body, clinging it as to not accidentally flash a single soul. An all-too-cheery voice answers. 

“Y/n! So, I was thinking- We never really decided on a place to eat at.” He pouts, a teasing tone peaks his expressions. Even though you couldn’t see him, you could see the child-like boxy smile he’d always sport. 

You decide to have a little fun with your new found friend. “I’m sorry- Who’s this?” You could hear the hurt in his voice. 

“It’s Taehyung.. Already forgot about me, huh?” You giggle, throwing the phone onto your bed after pressing the speaker button. 

“I’m playing with you Taehyung.” He huffs. “Not very funny of a joke, ma’am.” He retorts, making you snicker at the nickname. 

“You’re right, you’re right. I’m sorry Taehyung-ie. How about I make it up to you?” His voice cheers up quickly, amusement peaking his interests.

“And how would you do that, milady?” His voice sports a gentleman-y, british accent as if he’d been just brought out of a shakespeare play. 

You throw on a quick T-shirt before sprawling out on your bed. “Well, how about coming over tonight? I could make us some coffees.. Or I’ve got wine too.” He sucks in a breath, a saddened tone controls his voice. 

“Sorry, can’t tonight. Dad’s got me working extra hours all over Seoul, I’m not even home yet.” You pout, toying with your little anxiety ring you’d gotten from a friend back home. 

“Oh, okay then.” You’re quick to flip over, getting into a more comfortable position on your back. You stare up at the ceiling while talking with your only friend. 

“So, how is work?” Before you get a response you hear a loud crash on the other end. 

“Shit- I have to go, Y/n. Bye!”

“Oh oka-” 

He ends the call.

You sigh, rolling back and forth on the surface of your bed. You’d still been on Chicago’s clock, so you were wide awake right now. Your eyes roll at the time blinking on your nightstand’s alarm clock. 

12:39AM.

You needed to get to sleep. You KNEW you needed to get to sleep. But, your body had different plans. You decide to roll yourself out of bed, making your way to the little walk in closet right before the front door. You slide on your little fuzzy boots and a pair of sweatpants before walking out the door. 

“Oh!” You turn around, seeing Jimin leaning outside of his front door to drop off the trash in the hallway. You run up, catching him before he has the chance to slip back into his dungeon. 

“Hey-” You call, flashing him a warm smile. 

He slams the door in your face. 

Your frown reappears, sighing. 

What was everyone’s problem with you?

You were about to continue on your journey for late night convenient store snacks, but something inside of you had irked to get a hi from him still. So, you knock on his door. 

No answer. 

“Come on, Jimin. I know you’re in there!” You call out, banging on his door now. After a few minutes and a rude comment from a neighbor telling you in a very passive way to ‘shut up’ he’d finally opened the door. You push right through, hands on your hips to signal off confidence. 

“Y/n what do you-”

“Why didn’t you say hello back?” He shakes his head, not following. 

“What do you mean-” 

“I just said hi to you, and you slammed the door in my face!” He chuckles, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. 

“I just woke up.” Somehow, you don’t believe that. 

Your stupid self decides to rummage through his things. 

“Oh really?” You walk yourself over to his desk and gaming chair, feeling the monitor’s heat. “Hmm, computer’s still warm.” You comment, accidentally bumping the mouse with your wrist. The screen lights up, as your face drains with color. 

A bunch of women barely dressed on a leopard-print bed, hands rubbing and touching all over each other while some had fully been going down on one another. 

You could hear a dark chuckle in Jimin’s voice. A body comes up behind yours, towering your frame from backing.

“Caught me.” He whispers,fingertips trailing up the skin of your arms. You flinch, backing away from his touches as he lets out a laugh. “What? Aw, I’m just having a little fun with you.” He flashes you a cheeky wink as you try and calm your beating heart. 

“I– Sorry. I-I’ll just leave now-” He chuckles, opening the door wide. As you make your way through the exit, he leaves a few words to trail in your ears.

.

.

For the past few days you’d been bickering with Taehyung over where to go. Since you both were in moving saving mode, you decided to just cook up a nice dinner and watch a movie instead. 

You’re almost done putting the final touches on the dessert pie until you heard the doorbell ring. Walking past, you reach down to fluff a few pillows on your couch before answering. You crack the door open, a wide smile plastered onto your face until you’d seen who was behind it. 

“You..” He chuckles. 

“Me.” 

Franky you’d been avoiding Jimin for the past two days. Ever since your jet-lagged brain decided it was a good idea to march into his apartment and check out his browsing history, things had been pretty awkward between the two of you. 

Well, just for you. 

“I’ve got something.” He teases, holding his hands behind his back. You nod, keeping him outside of the door. “Uhm can it wait ‘til later? I’m kinda busy..” He pushes past your shoulders before you could even protest. 

“Payback, wifey.” A smirk tugs the corner of his lips as he holds out the tiny box on front of you. 

“Take a guess.” 

You sigh, shrugging. “I don’t know.” 

“That’s the whole point of taking a guess. You’re really bad at this game.” He chuckles, swinging the little box in his grasp. 

“I don’t know, Jimin.” He groans, pouting. “You’re no fun.” He unboxes the object, holding it out to show you. 

“I still don’t get what it is.” He shakes his head, obviously annoyed by your adituttde. 

“Fine, then I guess you don’t need the router.” Your eyes widen. 

“Wait!” You reach out to pause his actions, making him smirk. “Oh now you answer me.” He chuckles, setting the little device on your kitchen counter. 

His eyes take a glance to the kitchen table, feasting upon the delicious, mouth-watering platters and bowls filled with some of his favorites. 

“Ah, good! You remembered our deal.” Your eyes look at the food, then back to him to quickly shake your head. 

“Uh no- actually-”

Ding.

Dong.

.

.

Jimin’s eyebrow quirks at the revealment of the guy behind your apartment door. Taehyung’s bright and boxy smile soon drops as his eyes land upon the strange man in your livingroom. The newly dyed locks tinted with colors of the sky had shifted from their styled position. 

“Who’s this?” Taehyung comments, questioning the new man. Jimin’s lips tug more into a smirk at his confusion. 

“Her cousin.” Jimin retorts, watching as you flash him a ‘what?!’ look. Taehyung’s eyebrows knit in confusion as Jimin’s quick to correct himself with a light chuckle.

“Distant.” 

You let out a nervous chuckle at his words. 

Shit.

.

.

The dinner table felt like a couffin. Suffocating and awkwardly tight. Hadn’t helped that your little circular table could barely fit two people, much less three.You had tried to kick him out, really you did. But he had been too stubborn, pulling up his own make shift seat of your lidded trash can to support on. The smug and tight grin on Jimin’s lips had made your jaw clench with annoyance. Taehyung’s quick to clear the thick air, along with his throat. 

“So, Y/n. How do you feel about sea animals?” He smiles, trying to ignore the elephant in the room. 

Your mouth falls open to answer, but the slick circles drawn against your thigh halts you.. You take a glance over, Jimin on the sidelines taking a large bite of his pork and rice, completely unfazed by the situation. The tense of his right arm doesn’t go unnoticed by you. His hand slipped up the space of your dress, caressing your knee before rising his touch higher. 

Your eyes flash back to Taehyung’s who had a questioning look. You let out a loud chuckle, trying to shift your leg away from Jimin’s fingers as your answer. 

“Love ‘em.” You flash him a quick smile. He returns the little expression, a relaxed ease sets upon him. 

You? Not so much. 

“Well what about getting a little wet?” Taehyung quirks, leaning a little closer to make his voice clear. 

Jimin’s fork swirls around the surface of his plate, a bored expression plasters his features as he cuts in. “Easy.” You feel the tips of his fingers drag along the heat of your skin, resting on the outers of your underwear. His index finger presses slightly against your soaking panties, your lips fall to form a small O-shape. Thighs squeezing together at the sensation. 

“I don’t think she minds getting wet.” Jimin comments, an unamused expression toys his features as he takes a sip of his soju. You nod, shifting slightly in your seat, which in turn had made Jimin’s touch fall further in the gap of your thighs. His fingertips tease your clothed heat, a silent moan rumbles from the deep of your chest. 

“Perfect!” He turns his reach into his pocket, pulling out two pieces of thick paper. “The new aquarium in Incheon just opened. I was hoping you and I could maybe go tomorrow?” You nod, trying your best to stay silent. Jimin’s touch lingers on the outerparts of your heat, silently commanding you to beg him. 

You weren’t. 

Your grin follows the sweet tone in your voice you’d forced yourself to keep, even though everything in your body had been screaming to do quite the opposite. 

“So Taehyung,” Jimin comments, sliding the fabrics of your underwear to the side, carding one finger through your slick folds teasingly. Taehyung’s head tilts, smiling friendly even though he’d been quite disappointed in Jimin’s unannounced presence. 

“Yeah?” He questions. Jimin shifts, crossing one leg over the other to make himself appear smaller. 

Though, his actions had been quite the opposite. 

“How’d you two lovebirds meet?” He asks, quietly catching the way your chest tightens as his finger teases your entrance, coating the digit in your juices. A smirk presses his lips. 

Taehyung chuckles, a shy glance directed to you. “Well, here actually.” Jimin faints a forced interested look, nodding at the stupid interaction. 

“Yeah, my dad had hired me for his moving service for the summer before I go back to college so I could make some more money. I had helped her move in, then shot my shot.” You fight back a moan, letting out a sharp breath as he inserted the length of his finger past your velvet walls. Your hands reach out, one catching on Jimin’s forearm to steady yourself. Silently begging for him to stop so you could enjoy your date with Taehyung. 

Jimin nods, almost making your loose it when his finger starts to pump in and out of you at a teasingly slow rate. His eyes narrowed, getting bored with Taehyung’s little story. 

“Hah, how funny.”Though his words matched his features, his tone had not. A cold and hardly-entertained looks paces his face. 

Taehyung mentally groans at Jimin’s pulsing bicep. He stands, pushing hismelf away from the table with force. You startle, eyebrows meeting in concern. 

“Taehyung what’s-” 

“You know, it’s kind of common courtesy not to let your neighbor finger fuck you while you’re on a date with another guy.” Jimin smirks at his words, releasing you in his grip, watching as you rise to meet Taehyung’s level. 

“Y-You kne-” 

"Of course I fucking knew, Y/n. I helped him install his gaming setup when he moved in.” Your head cranes to Jimin, seeing the cocky grin upon his features. Turning back, your eyes meet Taehyung’s. His burned with anger and fury. 

“Taehyung I’m so sorry-” He chuckles, scoffing with a harsh tone. 

“My thing isn’t that he was groping you on our date, Y/n. It’s the fact that you lied to me.” Your heart aches at his words. Your feet close the space between you and him, but he backs away. 

“Don’t, Y/n. And you.” His eyes narrow to Jimin who’d shifted to your seat to lean back. Leg crossed over the other, while his shiny finger had been popped into the crease of his mouth. Taehyung’s hands fist at the sight. 

“Dick move, Jimin.” 

With that, Taehyung storms out. You tried following him down the hall, but he had been too fast for your7-inch heels to catch up with. You let out a silently breath, leaning up against your front door. 

Your eyes land crack open to land upon Jimin’s laxed figure. He’d risen to lean up against the back of your couch, arms crossing his chest. He shakes his head, smirking. 

“Not cool, Y/n.” Your fists clench at his cocky tone. 

“Get out.” You command, swinging the door open to lead him. He shakes his head, making his way to the door, walking out. 

.

.

“Over here!” You wave, signaling your location through this messy crowd. He makes a beeline to your table before sitting down quietly. A silence had drawn out for far too long. You take notice in the tanned, unusual overcoat he’d thrown over his white button up and navy blue suit pants. Black loafers to compliment his whole attire. 

“Thanks for meeting with me..” You let out a deep breath, trying to break the awkward silence between the two of you. He nods, eyes glancing around the restaurant to look anywhere but your pleading self. 

“You’ve got a probem with lying, Y/n.” He comments coldly. You could do nothing but nod, agreeing with his harsh but true words. 

‘I know.. Taehyung I’m so sorry for lying to you.” You lean forwards, trying to catch his gaze. He’d done a pretty good job of ignoring you for the past few weeks. 27 missed calls and 14 text messages later, he’d finally caved in and agreed to meet you at the little cafe you’d originally planned to meet at for your first date. 

His arms fold across his chest,, leaning back to entertain your guilt. “Go on.” 

Your fingers clench around the mug, toying with the warmed handle from the hot joe inside. “I shouldn’t have lied to you about him being my cousin. It was stupid, anyways.” You let out a short chuckle, feeling the atmosphere soften just a bit. 

“Indeed.” He still holds onto his firm and upset composure. You push the basket of break rolls to his side, a silent peace offering sits in front of him. 

“I do like you, Taehyung. You’re really sweet, and kind and always so considerate of others-” He chuckles, scoffing at your generic sayings. 

“Sounds more like a breakup rehearsal than an apology.” You nod, hitting your head at the stupid comments. 

“What I’m getting at is; I never should’ve let Jimin do any of that. He was honestly just there to replace my wifi router, swear!” He leans forward, studying your features for any sign of a lie. When he finds none, he returns to his slouched posture taking a sip from his wine glass he’d ordered. 

“Then why did you?” His question throws you off. 

Why did you let him touch you like that? Get away with it…

 Let it go so far.

Taehyung scoffs at your silence. His feet shift, eyebrows raised with sarcasm. His tone lowers, mumbling into the bottom of his wine glass. “Silence of the lamb.” 

You sigh, banging your head gently onto the tale before raising up. He takes pity on yourself, deciding to ease you. 

“Do you like him?” Your head shakes. 

“Liar.” 

“I’m not lying!” 

“Then tell me,” He leans closer, closing the large, table-sized gap between the two of you. 

"Would you have let me do that then?” Your pussy clenches at the thought, Taehyung’s slender fingers thrusting themselves deep against your slick walls, hand cupped over your mouth to shut you up from the ears of others.

Your lips fall flat. Eyes looking at Taehyung, imaging him doing all of those things, 

Yet, when you’re thinking of moaning his name, all you can hear is..

“Jimin.” He states coldly, tongue poking at the inside of his cheek. If green was jealousy’s color, he’d been a fucking broccoli stalk.

You shake your head, flushing the stupid thoughts from your mind. Your hand reaches out, eyes shading darker to his narrowed ones. You lean closer, brushes of hot air roll past his cheek onto the shell of his ear. 

“I want you.”

.

.

His dark chuckle stripes the atmosphere from the sexy and alluring scene you’d tried to play. He toys back, giving barely any attention to your neediness. 

“Oh really?” You nod, hand reaching down to palm at the forming tent between his thighs. His lips roll out a soft grunt at the touch. 

“How much.” He demands, warm hands coming to rub on the balls of your knees. Your lips brush the outer of his reddened ear, tongue poking the sensitive. You moan, sending the thin skin vibrating in waves. 

“So badly.” 

.

.

“Oh fuck-” You moan out, hands gripping onto the skin of his back for a false safety. Nails digging and scratching at the rededened the bare complexion. Your tongue grazes his lips, before he takes you in his reach to swallow yourself whole. Hands roaming each other like wild animals in some kind of feral heat. The headboard claps against the wall’s poor dimensions, securing the dents and markings that were sure to follow tomorrow’s awakening. His voice deepens with each passing, passionate second. 

“Shit!” His lips fall to a large O-shape, uncontrollably snapping his hips into yours. His large frame towers over yours, leaning down to plant heavily sloppy kisses to the base of your neck. 

“Mmm, gonna cum-” His raspy voice thickens, becoming easily weary of his nearing climax. You could feel the way his throbbing cock pulses in the depths of you, as yourself had been efforting the same pulse around his meaty cock. 

“Oh God-” You head falls back, arms catching yourself onto his neck to make sure you remain unscathed. Your legs wrapped around his waist, sucking his girth into yourself to your limit. His large banded arms coil around your smaller frame, pulling your body flushed against his. A few gruff and loud moans here to there, shared between the two of you. Soon, you’d felt the rushing wave of pure ecstasy coarse through your frame. His sweaty form drops onto the length of you, heavy pants exile his chest from the intense session. You glance down, seeing the blonde and greasy locks blocking his features. 

“Jimin!?”

.

.

Your body jolts itself awake, propping up like a doll with a metal pole as its spine. Your chest heaves with heaviness and anxiety as shock flushes your system from its previous ecstatic state. You find your hand slunk down into the space of your mini shorts, fingers pressed against your aching bud. Memories from the day’s events had coarse your mind like a taunting, awaiting jack-in-the-box. 

He pushes your body away from his own, hands releasing the tight grip you’d formed around his hardened length. Your frame falls backwards, catching itself right before impact. He stands, a furious aura surrounds his whole once bright and soft figure. 

“Good-bye, Y/n.” 

You groan, rolling over to reach for the pillow, suffocating yourself with the plush object. You head spins with uncertainty. You felt like shit. 

Your feet land on the floor, guiding you unconsciously to the self-indulgent kitchen you’d stocked. The darkness that floods your apartment had been good for keeping to yourself, not having to worry about anything else you had to get done, until you wake up for work in a few hours. 

“Morning.” A sudden voice becks out from the silence. You’re quick to land your grip on a steak knife from the counter, waving it blindly in the abyss for protection. His chuckle makes your heaty drop into your stomach. 

“Put that away before you hurt yourself, wifey.” You groan, tossing the sharp object into the sink, reaching out to find the light switch. His cocky smile makes your teeth grind with frustration. 

“How the hell did you get into my apartment?” You scoff, watching as he points his index finger to the wide open door. 

“You left it unlocked.” Your arms cross, a narrowing look paints your tired and gaunt features. His wide and torturous smile makes your stomach bubble. 

“Enjoy your sleep?” He questions, reaching over to put the bowl of cereal he’d made himself into the left side of your sink. 

“Did, until you came.” He chuckles, stalking your figure before he’s standing right infront of you. “Really? Cause it looked like you were wide awake before I even got here.” Scoffing, you push at his chest making him stumble back a bit to catch himself. 

“Go home, Jimin.” You make your way to the fridge to place the milk back on the shelf. He follows, hoping up onto your counter like a kid. 

“Don’t wanna.” You huff, slamming the cabinet. 

“Go. Home.” You repeat, already tired of his shinannigains. He leans closer, meeting your gaze. 

“I. Don’t. Want. To.” 

“Wasn’t. A. Question.” You retort, making him smirk. 

“You’re cute when you’re angry.” Your eyes lull to the back of your head at his shameless attempt. 

“And you’d be really cute with this knife shoved in your thick head.” He laughs, raising an eyebrow up in questioning. 

“So you think I’m cute?”

You scoff, eyes rolling. “Not in the slightest.” He hums, tilting his head before following you into your room. 

“But you said really, which means that I was just cute before. So therefore, you think I’m cute.” You plop down on your bed, body feeling extremely heavy from your sleep-deprived state. 

“Not listening, I’m sleeping.” He chuckles, scooting his way over to your side of the bed to lay next to you. His arm rests under his head for support. 

A few moments of silence flows by before he continues. “Didn’t know you were such a daredevil.” You sit up, giving him a stern look. 

“I’m not.” 

He chuckles, shrugging. “Really? Cause letting a stranger finger you while you’re on a date sure sounds like something a daredevil would do.” Your eyes roll, pushing his frame away with the soles of your feet. 

“Get out of here, Jimin. Why did you even come in the first place?” He smirks, walking around to the side of your bed, kneeling in front of your pillow cover face that’d been hanging off your bed’s edge. 

“Why, I heard my name of course.” Your eyebrow quirks at his words. “Oh yeah? Who called you.”

A devilish grin toys the corner of his lips. He lowers his voice to a deep tone, much like the one you’d heard earlier in your little escapade-like dream. 

“You did.” You let out a sharp chuckle. “Me?” He nods, making the fits of laughters wash in waves even more. Once you’ve settled down, you can clear the air. 

“Hate to break it to ya loverboy, but I was sleeping if you couldn’t already tell.” 

He lowers himself to meet your level once more. Hands slid into the fronts of his jean pockets, blonde locks falling to the sides of his face to frame his features perfectly. 

“I’m aware.” 

Your eyes narrow, not following in his little innuendos. He reads your expression, and decided to elaborate some more. 

“Well, these were more along the lines of ‘Jimin’.” He mocks a woman high-pitched moan, head thrown back to add a dramatically erotic effect. 

“Yeah right, like I did anything like tha-” 

“Oh Jimin! Oh fuck ah- Mmm, gonna cum!..” Your eyes widen like saucers at the little sounds. Eyes training upon the little cellphone held in his hands, showing you the recorded melody. His smirk never faulters from amusement of you. 

“You were saying?” 

Your body froze. That had for sure been your voice. Hell, it even showed a sliver of your bedroom for a second. You had been sprawled out on your bed, covers thrown off as your hand had been stuffed into the lining of your underwear. Thighs trembling to signal your nearing climax. 

You. Were. Mortified. 

“I- Well that- My dog-” The longer you’d tried to come up with an excuse, the stupider you sounded. He chuckles, tilting his head back while holding his stomach. 

“Your dog?” His eyes well into little crescent shaped moons, irises disappearing from sight. 

“The only bitch in heat my dear, is you.” You groan, reminding yourself later to go jump off Seoul’s largest bridge. 

“I called out your name,” He starts, sitting on the edge of the bed to slide his phone back into his pocket. He chuckles, remembering your sleep-induced reaction. 

“But you just got louder.” You grab the nearest pillow and start suffocating yourself. He laughs, prying the beautiful death away from your grasp. 

“Hey, you saw my porn collection.” He teases, poking at your side to try and get you to laugh this off like friends would. 

“Yeah, but it’s not me!” His body stiffens at the words. Lowering his tone, he mumbles.

“It might.” 

You sigh, wanting the earth to swallow you whole. You take the pillow from his grip, digging your face into the soft plush once more. “Just let me die.” He smiles, tugging the pillow from you once more. 

“Nah, I’m not into that necrophilia shit.” You huff, pulling your knees up to hide your face in. He leans closer, brushing a few strands of  hair from your vision. 

“Guess this means we’re even now, huh?” You chuckle along with him, cheeks still burning with embarrassment. 

“Was quite a unique sight.” He sighs, taking the pillow to tuck it under his clasped arms. Leaning back, he supports his weight against your headboard while continuing. 

“Never seen a girl masturbate to me.” You scoff, not believing that for a damn second. “Yeah right.” His torso twists to face you, giggling. 

“It’s true.” 

“No girlfriend?” 

He shakes his head. “They just wanted sex. Nothing else.” You shift, not really knowing what to respond to that. 

“They also thought I was weird..” Your head cranes, tilting to listen better. “Why?” 

His hands fidget between the thick of his thighs, shrugging. “I liked taking photos.” You smile, laughing. 

“Everybody does. Photography’s a very popular hobby nowadays-”

“Of them.” 

“Well yeah, you like to remember the fun times you had with loved ones-”

“Naked.” 

Yeah, you had no counter for that one. 

He chuckles, a tint of red flushes his cheeks. “See? You think it’s weird too.” Your head hesitantly shakes, denying it. 

“No- It’s just- I wasn’t expecting it.” He sighs, leaning his head back against your headboard. “I just think that women’s bodies are exquisite.” You chuckle, nudging his arm. 

“Large word for a small guy.” His eyes flash towards yours, suddenly not so bright eyed and puppy-like. 

“Think I’m small?”

You nod. “You’re not that big of a guy. Taehyung’s much larger-” He’s quiet to flip you on your stomach, sitting atop your lower back while holding your arm behind yourself. 

“Can still do this, though.” He smirks. 

“Yah! Get off me!” He chuckles, leaning down to brush the pads of his lips to your skin, ghosting your heated body. 

“No.” 

“Yaaaah Jimin, my baaack!” You groan, muffling your noises into the pillow below you. A smile creeps his lips, before he’s rising off from you. You groan, sitting up to speak. 

“Yah, that really hurt du- Jimin?” As quick as he’d left, he’s right back at the end of your bed, This time, sporting an old polaroid in his right hand. Your eyebrows raise in confusion. 

“What’s that for?” He smirks, edging himself closer to you on the bed. His proximity makes you fall back onto the bed as he towers your frame, camera still firmly held in his hands. 

“Mind being my model?” You laugh, hands pressing at his chest as he leans back to sit atop your lap. 

“For?” 

His eyes glance up, taking a peak from filling his camera with film. His blonde locks fall loosely infront of his vision, making the scene so much more intense.

“Me.” 

“Well of course you, idiot.” He smiles, wiping the camera lens with the thin of his black T-shirt, lifting the material up to give you a little peak of his softly defined abs. 

“I don’t need you jacking off to them.” He quirks, taking a glance to look back up to you. “You jacked off to me.” Your mouth falls to answer, but then shuts. He smirks, taking your silence as a win. 

“Just lift your top a bit.” He teases, holding the camera up to his face, peaking out the little lens. You laugh, bucking your hips up to try and nudge him off of your small frame. 

“Oh come on, Y/n. I feel violated.” He pouts, lip-quivering in a fake pained expression. 

“What? How so.” He whines, shifting on your lap like a little kid. 

“You violated my privacy. Barged into my apartment, and went through my laptop. Sexual harassment at it’s finest.” You scoff, eyes rolling at his stupid reasoning. 

“Your laptop was already on. And I’ve never sexually harassed you. If anything, that shit you pulled at the dinner table was sexual harassment.” He smiles, using his free finger to tilt your head to the side, getting a better angle. 

“Part your lips.” 

“Jimin I’m not doing this.” 

“Open your mouth or I’m gonna tie you to this bed and slip a vibrator into your panties. And take pictures of that instead.” Your eyes widen at his choice of words, suddenly feeling the room heat from his proximate figure sat atop you. 

He smirks, moving a few strands from your vision, while positioning your hair a bit to get a nice shot. Your mouth had opened slightly from shock, which he took as a chance to snap a little picture. 

“Got it.” He smiles, hiding the little sheet of film under the nearest pillow. 

“I’m pretty sure this is sexual harassment.” 

He chuckles, reloading for another shot. “Not harassment if you’re enjoying it.” 

“Now who made up that rule?” A devilish smile crack his straightened lips.

“I did.”

He reaches down, flashing you to the little polaroid picture from a few seconds ago. 

“Wow..” You gawk, admiring the beautiful position he’d moved you to. Pieces of your messy hair falls into your forehead, framing your face perfectly. The lack of light plus his flash had made this simple photo look like a work of art. 

“Natural beauty.” He picks up the camera once more, pulling the picture away to get another shot. 

“Okay you’ve had your fu-” 

“I think you’d look better tied up.” He giggles, scooting off of your body to sit on the side. He stands, walking to your closet to rummage through your things. 

“Hey, I didn’t give you-” 

“Perfect!” He holds out a silky tie that you’d forgotten to give back to your ex. The silky red material dangles loosely in his grip as he makes his way over to set himself next to your laid out figure. 

“Hands?” 

Your arms reach out, giving full access to whatever he wanted of you. The motion makes him smile, patting your head. 

“Good girl.” 

“Jimin it’s almost morning-” His eyes glance towards you, previously focused on binding your hands together. “So?” 

“So- I need you to let me up.” He chuckles, motioning down to your figure.

“I’m not holding you down.” 

He’s right. You’d been giving him permission to do all of this. You were the one who didn’t want it to secretly end. 

He reaches up, loosely tying your hands above your head to bind them to your grid headboard. He picks up his camera from off the side once more, holding it up to his face to angle it down your way. 

“Smile for me.” You shake your head, not being in the mood. 

“Smile.” 

He reaches down, tickling at your side torturously. Your head throws back, mouth popping wide open at the giddy sensation. One flash of his camera later, he throws the little old device to the side. 

“You’ve got an adorable smile.” He coos, hovering over your locked in figure. A rosy tint paints your cheeks. 

“Thanks..” 

His lips lower, bushing the soft skin of your forehead before dragging the back down a bit, mumbling something sweet. 

“Mine.” 

.

.

The smell of freshly baked bread waffs through your apartment. Your counters had been filled with sweet and gooey treats. Your whole upperhalf had been dusted heavily with flour and egg whites. Though it had taken almost 5 hours, you’d finally baked all of the necessary goodies you needed. 

You walk yourself through all of the desserts, making sure you hadn’t missed a single thing. “Pudding, cherry pie, hotteoks, creme brulee..” You sigh in satisfaction, admiring all of your hard work. 

You glance down, seeing your messy and caked in self. A chuckle exiles past your lips. Making your way to the bathroom, you’d just taken off your sweater before hearing the doorbell sound off. 

Walking over, you try fixing your hair best as you could before opening the door. 

“Welcome.” You swing the door wide, allowing the man to enter. 

“Thank you.” He takes in a deep breath, sighing at the delectable aroma. You take his coat, hanging it on the rack before leading him to the dining table. 

“Smells amazing.” You smile, silently patting yourself on the back for his commentary. 

“This way. I- Didn’t know what you preferred, so I just made all of them..?” He chuckles, making his way through your living room to sit upon the balcony’s patio. You’re quick to bring the treats out, only taking two round trips before settling yourself in the seat across from him. His dark button up, and white, creamish dress pants had made him look even more elegant than ever. 

“So, how's the progress going?” He questions, as you sigh in relief. 

‘It’s going great. The product’s development is really coming along. I could even move the release date up a month.” He smiles, watching as your delicate hands cut a few slices of the pie for the two of you. His large hand comes to cover yours, stopping your motions gently. 

“Y/n.. You didn’t have to make all of this. I would’ve been fine with cough drops for all I care.” You giggle,  shaking your head. 

“You’ve been a huge stepping stone in getting my stuff out there… I owe you.” He smiles, his face coming to close the distance between the two of you. His breath mixes with your own, a different kind of feeling settles over the scene. 

His voice lowers, but a bare whisper. “Y/n..” 

A brightly lit flash of light separates the two of you quickly. “Annnddd, got it. See Y/n? Told you you’re photogenic.” Jimin’s face scrunches at the picture. “Mmm, you bro? Not so much.” 

“Jimin!” You gripe, standing to push him out of your apartment. 

“What? Just trying to capture nature’s beauties.” He leans to the side, sending your co-worker a narrowed glance. “And.. uglies.” 

“Jimin, I’m in the middle of something!” Your voice lowered so he couldn’t hear. A deep chuckle exiles his chest. A hand places itself upon your shoulder, making Jimin’s fist clench in silent anger. The man’s hand extends outwards, offering Jimin a passive shake. 

“I’m Namjoon.” Jimin smirks, taking his hand in a firm shake. 

“Nice to meet you.” You sigh, rubbing your temples from frustration. 

“Jimin could you please just leave? I’ve got to discuss some things with Namjoon.” Jimin huffs silently, quirking his eyebrows. 

“Nah, Think I’ll stay.” He plops onto your couch, crossing one leg over the other in a relaxed position. You were about to protest but a beep cuts you off. 

“Ah, sorry Y/n. It’s Eleana, I’ve gotta get going.” He’s quick to make his way to the door, grabbing his trench coat from the rack. He throws it over his figure. 

“Wait- Who’s Eleana?” You call out, making your way over to his spot. He fixes the collar of his button up, tightening his tie. 

“She’s with High Lines. She’s our rep, but the bidders aren’t biting so she’s calling me in to sweet talk ‘em.” He calls out, making his way quickly down the hallway before turning around. 

“Thanks for the pie!” 

You wave, smiling brightly as he leaves. Once he’s completely out of sight, you slam the door, huffing from frustration. 

“Jeez, Y/n. So desperate.” He teases, taking a bite from the apple displayed in the bowl set on your counter. You turn around, ears -would be- steaming from anger. 

“I am NOT desperate!” He leans back from your volume, covering his ears to shield them from your anger. 

“I was trying to have a nice dinner with a coworker-” 

“Who you wanna fuck.” 

“And eat some pie with him-”

“Who you wanna fuck.” 

“And then a stupid photography student had to barge in and ruin my damn day!” 

He smirks, dragging out his words. “Who you want to fuck.” 

Your fists clench at your sides, face reddening from fury. You reach over for the throw pillow, putting its name to good use. He’s quick to dodge, laughing at your sad attempt. 

“And what’s with you, huh!? One minute you’re completely avoiding me and the next you’re trying to take nude photos of me?!” He goes silent, slowly reaching forwards to take a bite of one of the hotteok you'd made. 

“Been deciding.” He comments, licking his thumb clean of the chocolate. 

“On what.” You gripe, going to clean up the kitchen in anger. He hops off the counter, placing himself behind, gently slowly moving your movements to a halt before he has his hands on each side of your hips. His front gently presses against your back, his warm breath coming to creep up behind your ear like a little kid on halloween. 

“On you.” 

You turn to turn around to face him, but his hands steady your hips preventing you. Your head lulls back, originally trying to talk to him but he’d taken the opportunity to press wet kisses to the side of your neck. Your lips part, a soft moan escapes into the thin air. His hands follow the lines of your body, reaching forwards to cup your breasts. 

“You smell like cookies.” He whispers, making you laugh. 

“Gee, I wonder why?” He chuckles, twisting your body around to press flush against his. You two had been in the most intimate embrace of a lifetime. Your arms coiled around his neck, his hands settled back to steady your hips. His forehead nudges closer, pressing against your to tease your lips with his breath. 

Your voice softens, “That tickles..” He smiles, back the two of you into the counter. “Mmm, ticklish?” He wraps his arms around your thighs, lifting you up in one swoop to set you down on the counter. He plants himself between your widened legs, hands resting on the small of your waist. 

“Have you no memory of last night?” His head tilts, faking a confused expression. “Mmmm, remind me.” You laugh, going to unwrap your arms from his but he’s swift to scoop you up bridal style. 

“Or, shall I remind you.” 

.

.

Your pushed back into the soft plush of your bedsheets. The cream colored fabrics jumping in alignment with your bounce when pressure is applied. His body stalks yours, leaning over you like a falling Jenga tower.

"Jimin are we-" His finger comes to press against your lips, quieting your rambling mouth.

"Tell me right now that you don't want to fuck me. If you don't, then shut the fuck up kindly, wifey."

Your arms fall to your sides. You were going to protest, push him off of you and kick him out of your apartment never to be seen again but-

You did want him to stay.

Your head nods softly, earning him a small grin. His hands snake up your body, lips pressing against you neck in a slowed and hushed manor. Fingertips graze the hem of your cropped tee. His chest releases a lowered grunt, slipping the thin fabric over your head before throwing it somewhere across the room.

His fingers trail along the lace of your brassiere. A smile paints his lower face at the sight. "Pretty." Suddenly, his expression switches. From loving and soft, to demanding and hard.

"Were you planning on fucking that Nam-shoe guy?" You chuckle at his insult, hands cupping both sides of his cheeks.

"Honestly? A little." His hands grip onto the lace fabric, ripping the expensive-looking material from your warmed body.

You let out a short yelp, hands flying to cover yourself. He groans, pulling your hands away.

"Don't you fucking even try, baby." He smirks, leaning his head down to your level. His soft breaths roll across the skin of your cheek, landing on your ears. "Wearing these tight ass jeans, and a shirt that wouldn't even fit a fucking baby doll? You're just asking for it."

You nod, flashing him some cute pleading eyes. "I am asking." He lets out a dark chuckle, hands coming to pinch lightly at your exposed nipples. Your head lulls back, groaning at the sudden touch.

"I don't need asking. I want you begging."

Hands gripping the bottom of your thighs, he pulls your your body down until the hardened outline of his jeans had been pressed firmly against your aching core.

his arms lock into place, trapping you in his grip.

"What do you say?"

Your throat feels dry. However, your panties had become more than soaked through. You shouldn't do this. You really shouldn't. You'd already fucked up with Taehyung, and now with Namjoon? This man has caused you nothing but trouble.

Yet, you still couldn't help the words that seemingly fall from your lips so easily.

"Please."

________________________

PART TWO WILL BE RELEASED ASAP.

[foolsocracy]

i wanna know how you learned how to render, it's so yum 😞💔

thank you!!! I'm glad u like it. I can try my best to explain my process but its very much a 'feel it with my heart' experience. This is gonna be long and incomprehensible but I'm gonna try:

If we're talking about the (above) garth & baby arthur jr pic or the bloody pete pic, I'd say i started to actually render like that in maybe high school art class (they were much worse then ofc because i have years more practice now)? Obviously my process now is different than it was back then, but before I actually started physically painting canvases with acrylics I usually just did line art and color without the blending-painting pizzazz.

Thats actually where I get my weird random interspersed colors in my coloring as well. Acrylics dry super fast and a high school art class is like 45 minutes so I'd have to totally mix a new pallet the next day. Not that I couldn't color match, but its annoying and having variations with colors or just mixing something up to fill in gaps looks neat if you get it right. If it looks bad just paint over it, but its worth it to try.

My process with these is almost exactly like my non painterly rendered ones, just with steps after. Also, you can get away with a lot when not fully rendering, but when i do render PHOTO REFERENCE is to die for. Specifically for the lighting. I can't emphasize this enough. By the time i'm done with a drawing my search history should be like "knees. Knees sitting. Knee anatomy. Harsh light photography. Curly hair. baby. J. C. Leyendecker new year baby" + 8 pictures of u doing whatever pose you're trying to do.

Anyway, the process for me is usually: vague sketch > carve out the lines/neater sketch > flat colors > basic shading/rendering > color adjusting sketch lines (usually from black to dark red) > collapse everything into one layer & get to WORK

I know the 1 layer thing is scary, but thats life. Its easiest to adjust things that way (for me). No need to worry about layers and blending modes cause its all right there. I usually duplicate the layer the drawing is in before I start on something crazy just to reassure myself that if I fuck it up I can go back. So a lot of the time my layers in procreate are progressively more rendered stages of the piece lol.

Now that Im here trying to explain this im blanking on how to actually express it. Lets see. I can run through some general stuff:

For both of those artworks (baby & pete) they're 100% made with HB pencil on procreate (a default brush! I've never downloaded any new brushes cause im lazy). I actually made a brush explanation for someone a few months ago I can put that right here:

hopefully those are readable. sometimes tumblr flops lmk if my writing is illegible

the eraser tool is your BEST FRIEND!!!! The way I get my lines and shapes and whatnot is by making big ass strokes and then erasing until whatever I'm looking for reveals itself. Here's a video of that process from the aquababy pic. Ignore the jerky pauses lol. also there's the reference photo!:

rendering itself is really hard to describe. Basically just throw color at it until it works out. (just tried to add a video but tumblr says only 1 video allowed

I hope this is helpful somehow! Just threw a ton of stuff at you. If you want anything more or the actual video or smth just let me know!

[maddiescinema]

first, your services are very much appreciated and i hope you have a wonderful day

second, here's what i remember about the fic i'm looking for (and if it's not real wow my brain is so good at coming up with stories)

lando norris x reader

pretty sure reader is female

its (freelance?) photographer reader and i think also best friend reader

reader was hired by mclaren to do photography stuff for f1 and of the drivers, thats where lando and reader first met and became friends

im pretty sure its part of a (ongoing?) series

part smau part written

financial issues & mclaren not being able to hire reader all the time or smth like that (maybe) lead reader to accept a contract or whatever its called to photograph a football team

its one of england's/uk's football teams (im not well versed in football so bear with me) i think

i think the team may have been manchester city? and i think i remember a jack grealish or someone like that

anyways

reader goes there and does readers job and becomes accquianted with the team members

there's this one member who has a fuckboy/playboy reputation, and keeps bothering reader to go for dinner and eventually reader says yes bc he promises its just between friends

dinner goes fine until the end where he confides in reader that the team is going to let him go if he doesnt get his act together or so he believes

then he asks reader to pretend to be his girlfriend so that doesnt happen, reader says no, he threatens reader and her career, so she gives in and he says lets kiss in front of the paps so word gets out and they do bc theyre outside having this convo and there are paps around and an article is posted and it goes to social media

anyways that dude is an asshole

reader just ignores him and tries not to be with him and interact with him going back to work, and reader is feeling really alone bc lando isnt answering her calls and she deosnt really have anyone at the moment to vent and talk about this situation to, also the internet gets to her a bit i think

reader is camping out in an empty conference room getting stuff done when she goes to get a snack and maybe the bathroom to cry & try to call lando again?

when she comes back theres someone there and its jack grealish(?) (not the relationship forcing asshole) and shes like oh im sorry i must have forgot our meeting

hes like we had no meeting i just wanted to check up on you, bc ive noticed you been down lately and the whole dating thing

readers opens up and vents about being forced into the relationship

he shares that the team is either waiting or looking for a reason to let the asshole go bc his behaviour is bad and the players dont like him and dont get along with him

and he promises reader that if she ever needs anything that hes there for her and that she can go him

and she feels safe and happy and not alone anymore

and thats all i remember, and since im 94% sure that this is a series or at least part of a series, i might be mixing up parts

if you can find it thank you! if not thanks for trying!

p.s. why is it so hard to find things on tumblr??? ive tried to look for this but im also weak and give up to easily

first of all, thank uu 🫶🏻 i’m happy to help!!

second of all, I SWEAT I’VE READ SOMETHING LIKE THIS BEFORE, like i’m so sure but going back to find it is actually impossible 😭 i’ll try again tomorrow cause i know i’ve read this one BUT if anyone knows where to find it PLEASE let us know in the comments, my inbox or my dms!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻

UPDATE:

“A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words” by @f1byjessie

(thank you SO much to the comment and the anons who helped find this fic!! all the love to you guys!!)

[destiny-in-the-universe]

Updates on RC9GN Ships & Muses

I don't know why I need to clarify this since the RC9GN community has been amazing, and for those genuinely interested in my content, well, you can ignore this!

I'm going to split this into two different categories as well as how to send an ask because I am at my limit genuinely

Also, I can't remember who had this idea but I might create alternate ship names for the characters based on like, interests and/or objects.

Ships I'm Comfortable Writing

Randy x Howard (Weinerham) - emotionally constipated dumbasses who probably need therapy

Randy x Theresa (Fowlham) - high school sweethearts but they still need the nudge in the right direction

Randy x Debbie (Kangham) - the dumbass and the one who carries the braincells

Randy x Howard x Theresa (???) - i don't think there's an official ship name for these three! If anyone would like to help me come up with one, just let me know! (the enabler, the fuck-all attitude, and the epitome of flowers in human form-)

Randy x Howard x Debbie (???) - they also need an 'official' ship name. I thought of Chaos Trio for shits and giggles, but I'm uncertain atm (braincells and dumbasses: the sequel)

Debbie x Theresa (Fowlkang/Twirling Photography?) - literally a perfect match

Other Ships I Can Write but Are Not My Mains

Howard x Debbie (Weinerkang) - how to describe their relationship? who knows, but- well, it exists now

McFist x Viceroy (McViceroy) - the braincell and the dumbass

McFist x Viceroy x Marci (???) - McFist has two hands, y'all

Randy x Julian (Corpse Scarf!) - pls i don't have a silly way to explain their ship they're just adorable i love them sm goodbye

possibly Bucky x Julian (???) - don't expect me to write for this ship too much-

If there's any other ship you're interested in, let me know! Canon x Original Character is also allowed!

How to Send Me Asks?

Pick a ship! Or a muse (if you want standalone headcanons and/or ficlets/etc). You cannot get an ask answered without this.

Choose a prompt if you want something more specific. This can be literally anything from a song lyric (if it's the whole song, please send me a link- i obviously don't know all songs!), a word or two (park, coffee date, etc), OR anything else to your fancy. You can pick something more detailed!

If you want something set in an AU setting, please- please specify. Or I'm going to just write these as close to canon as I can

You can send multiple asks/requests! I really don't mind tbh- just don't send me more than three at once, I think-?

NSFW will not be accepted. Suggestive content is fine, but you have to be at least eighteen- it just cannot be straight up smut.

For original characters, please provide information regarding the OC! I can't write for a canon I know nothing about-

Anon will continue remaining open. I hope the situation has been dealt with because I just started deleting the asks- I will curate my tumblr experience to something comfortable for me and the people who truly want to have a great time here, but now we can talk about my RC9GN muses

RC9GN Muses

Mains

Randy Cunningham (He/Him, doesn't mind other pronouns) - age varies depending on ask/request. Unlabeled on Sexuality. Randy doesn't care about that sort of thing to be honest- he'll date anyone he feels an attraction for. Personal headcanon that he's trans!

Open for both romantic and platonic asks/requests!

First Ninja/Finja (He/Him) - age varies depending on asks/requests. Asexual, but Open to Dating. Doesn't care for partner's gender.

Open for both romantic and platonic asks/requests!

Human! Nomi/Nomicon (All Pronouns) - ageless/doesn't age due to immortality. Arospec + Asexual.

Open for Platonic Asks/Requests!

Secondary Characters

Howard Weinerman (He/Him) - age varies depending on asks/requests. Queer/Unlabeled. Doesn't care about his partner's gender.

Open for romantic and platonic asks/headcanons!

Julian (He/They) - age varies depending on asks/requests! Unlabeled. Bicurious, leans to men.

Open for romantic and platonic asks/requests!

Theresa Fowler (She/Her, open to other pronouns) - age varies depending on asks/headcanons! Bisexual.

Open for romantic and platonic asks/headcanons!

(I could not find a gif- shit)

Spike (He/It/Doesn't Fucking Care) - ageless bc he's a robot. Unlabeled.

Open for platonic asks/requests!

Nomirandy (No /jk He/They) - ageless?? Unlabeled/Bicurious. Kind of leans to men, but he doesn't care all that much

Open for romantic and platonic asks/headcanons!

Tengu! Howard (All) - ageless?? Who tf cares about labels?

Open for romantic and platonic asks/headcanons!

If there's other canons you would like for me to write, I can try but no promises to be honest- I'm experimenting with a lot of these and I thought they might be fun to write more often!

I might write another set of headcanons for each of these characters later tonight, and I do need to write the next piece of my meta-analysis at some point! Plus an ask I'm very bouncy about hahaha, but anyway- have a lovely day, everyone!

~ Ace (He/They)

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Heya! I just wanna first say I REALLY like your writing and it's so so cool to see some TD stuff on tumblr TwT the community is so small still so you are doing gods work here!!

I'm interested in a TD match up (possibly OM too if ur up to it!! either way idm<33)

- Name: Jay (nicknames: Bread, bug, jäyssi)

- pronouns: They/them

- sexuality: still figurin it out but I lean more towards men but also sometimes find women attractive too, non binary ppl are always a yes

- Zodiac/mbti: Cancer, ISFP-T

- appearance: 165cm tall, brunette ass lenght hair I usually just slick back using my headphones as a hairband. Always wearing noise cancelling headphones and prefer a more alternative style, almost also teetering to a 90's jock vibes :P small round sunglasses my beloved. Big love to suede leather bomber jackets and ripped jeans.

- Personality: Very empathetic, more of a listener than talker (unless it comes to my interests in which case I yap!!) Can come off as a bit monotone (I have alexithymia which causes emotions to be hard for me). I'm told I'm super approachable and comforting ^^" I get very excited over the little things and can be quite optimistic. I react quite badly to rejection or even the smallest failures.

- likes and dislikes: I LOVE snails, dandelions(my fav flower<33), anything mango flavored winter, art, everything and anything fluffy and listenin to music! I DISLIKE almost all fruits, summer, blood/gore (hemofobia), cooking (cooking anxiety), worded instructions.

- hobbies: I draw/paint digitally and traditionally. I always carry a sketchbook around everywhere :] I also really like going on easy hikes on forest trails as well as amateur photography!!

- extra info: I have autism/ADD so social stuff might suck and I can be very slow at times when it comes to learning stuff.

(If you're not currently doing matchups, please feel free to ignore this <3)

Hi Jay! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took a while. I hope you like your matchups!

In Tokyo Debunker, I match you with...

You and Towa make a good combination since you’re both good listeners and talkative at different times. When one of you is talking, the other is listening intently.

You like dandelions? Oh, Towa’s perfect for you! He’s always bringing you dandelions whenever he visits and plants them nearby so he has a constant supply.

I see him as someone who’s a fan of summer as well. He likes the feeling of the sun on his skin and enjoys going on walks through the Jabberwock fields with you.

He thinks it’s really cute that you have a fondness for fluffy things. There are plenty of those around Jabberwock and he’ll happily show them to you, as long as you show him some affection as well. His hair’s pretty fluffy after all…

Towa also thinks it’s really cute that you get so excited over little things. He thinks that sort of enthusiasm is much needed in the world and it’s lovely being around you.

In Obey Me, I match you with...

Simeon was first drawn to you because of your comforting presence. And the more time he spent with you, the more he fell for you.

Much like Towa, Simeon thinks it’s sweet how excited you get over little things. He feels he doesn’t have to hide his own excitement when he’s around you.

He’s a very creative person himself so he loves sitting by you when you paint or draw. He likes being around the creative process since it makes him feel inspired as well.

I can definitely see him as someone who likes photography and would really enjoy going on walks with you where you each take a camera and compare photos when you get back.

Simeon’s pretty good in the kitchen himself so as long as you don’t mind the company, he’d love to join you. If you prefer cooking by yourself, he’ll happily just have some of whatever delicious food you’ve whipped up.

[figula]

was gonna try and find this post on my blog to reblog it but tumblr being tumblr i couldnt find it even tho i searched for the words "wedding" "photography" etc lol which i definitely used in the FUCKING POST

anyway, the wedding photographer i hired, who is also one of my oldest friends, has not given us the pics. she told us it would take about 2 months. she told us this 9 montsh ago. lol

i checked in once and once only after the 2 months were up but she never got back to me

we paid her £1000 which is FAR below market rates, and absolutely a factor in why i haven't chased her for the pics beyond a "hey you ok?" type thing, but i want to stress that i specifically said to her even after she told us she'd definitely give us a reduced price bc she loves me etc: tell us how much to pay you and we'll pay it without argument, bc obviously i work in a similar type of field and i dont want to mug my friends off. this is fully the price SHE set!

bc she was ignoring me i messaged a mutual friend we have - she said that wedding photog is leaving her man, with whom she has 3 kids, this is obviously stressful... i just wish she'd told me instead of me having to hear it from someone else only when i asked??

i just dk what the appropriate course of action is really like i would be understanding if she sent am essage apologising for the wait and explaining her circs a bit more (again ive had radio silence since like the day after the wedding when we got a few taster pics sent over) but it has been SILENCE and even tho it was heavily reduced i did pay for like... what is a significant amount of money to me?

im feeling uncomforatble w/ doing it at all bc of our friendship (genuinely like fuck me for hiring a friend even a professional wedding photographer friend i was so pleased to have a professional wp friend lmao i was like ha ha i wont suffer like those people who just pay a friend with an iphone!!) so im probs just gonna hand the task over to ben bc he barely knows her so it'll be less awkward

[hamsamwich23]

Well hello there!

Howdy! My name is Sam and/or Mort.

I'm a 20 year old queer-asexual demiboy who uses he/they/it/xe pronouns. I am polyamorous and have one partner whom I love dearly💛

My main hobbies right now are creative writing and photography, but I also enjoy video games, roleplaying, cooking/baking, and reading in my spare time.

My bigger interests right now are Hello Puppets, 1nv&d³r Z¹m, Doki Doki Literature Club, Undertale/Deltarune, Cats Are Liquid, Regretavator (Roblox) and Cult Of The Lamb.

Video game interests (or games I Enjoy): Milk Inside/Outside A Bag Of Milk, Sucker for love! Games series, smile for me, Amanda The Adventurer, Undertale Yellow, Happy game, Night In The Woods, Limbo, Inside, *Omori*, The Dog Island, Minecraft, Needy Streamer Overload, *Bendy and the ink machine*, Yo-Kai Watch (1st and 2nd games), Hollow Knight, Okami, Backrooms games, Sonic Frontiers, I'm On Observation Duty, Among Us.

Show/series interests: Don't Hug Me I'm Scared, Adventure Time, Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood (just started), Tuca and Bertie, Nexo Knights, Ninjago, The Mandela Catalogue, Angel Hare

Music interests: GHOST/GHOST and pals, Lily Vane, RIProducer, Jack Stauber, Vocaloid, Peculiar audios, Penelope Scott

Misc interests/just stuff I like: Welcome Home project, Liminal Space, Moths, Space, The Backrooms lore, SCP Foundation lore, stickers, plushies,

*- I do not support the creator(s) behind these. And if anyone behind above listed interests has done something that I am unaware of then feel free to inform me.

I dabble in Self-shipping sometimes...I'm perfectly fine with sharing f/o's just don't be. Like. Weird or nasty about it? Like be chill be respectful and we're all good.

My DMS are always open to mutuals who want to talk, or anyone who's interested in my AUS or wants to talk about mutual interests, however please note that I have physical and mental health issues as well as work a full time job and am not always active or able to respond. I just appreciate any patience when it comes to talking to me.

My Two current main AUS at this moment are:

Unreality Au: A multi-fandom AU inspired by weirdcore and horror themes where the world has been overtaken by a unknown curse caused by dark magic. OCs and Characters from Hello Puppets, Doki Doki Literature Club, Undertale (somewhat), Fetch from mf Fazbear frights, maybe Regretavator dashed in and Hatsune Miku (because come on its Hatsune Miku!!! We can't NOT invite her to the multifandom au).

This story so far is planned to be told through one shots and short fanfiction. Not every fandom listed here is part of official lore but is implied to exist in the same universe for my own little fun

If interested, you can follow my blog: @unreality-au-content-hoard

Dimension 2020 AU: Revamped I/Z au featuring my Z¹msona/OC Twenty rewritten (as when I was younger the au was poorly written/executed). The new summary of this story is as follows:

"After being lost and found as a mere smeet, Twenty is finally able to move past the incident from years ago and live a normal life among other young irkens within the academy. Everything is going very well...until one day..... everything begins to go wrong."

While I will post links to the official fanfiction when it is started as well as updates on Instagram, I will not be posting anything about it on Tumblr for my own comfort.

Aside from these projects, Writing commissions and trades are CLOSED for an indefinite amount of time, as I am too busy to fulfill any more work. However, requests for Unreality one shots or suggestions are usually open.

DNI

While I am fully aware that people will most likely ignore my DNI boundaries, I am still going to put them out here that I will just block you if I see anyone in my DNI interacting with me. I may even end up blocking people out of paranoia or due to compulsions. I very much utilize the block button.

You will be blocked if you are- bigoted in any way/shape/form, pr0sh¹p/c∅msh¹p/similar, ship discourse focused blog, LGBTQ+ discourse focused blog, Rad-exclusive, a pro-harassment antishipper, people against self-shipping and/or OC x Canon, support use of AI art and AI content, support creators like Viziepop and JKrowling (or anyone I'm uncomfortable with), people who believe "black washing" is a thing and/or defend whitewashing, L∅l¹/sh∅t& con supporters/enjoyers, people who call themselves "M.A.Ps" (pedos. You're pedophiles), and anything similar to what is mentioned above

Though technically, even if you are none of the above, I still end up blocking people out of paranoia or if they give me bad vibes. I understand that it is irrational, however it is for my comfort and mental health.

Kink/NSFW blogs are okay to interact, but if you're pr/ship or make fetish art of minors/siblings/ect then uhhhh get lost

Please do NOT talk to me about Ship Discourse or LGBTQ+ Discourse I literally just want to chill here

Tags

Tags I would recommend blocking if they make you uncomfortable are:

woah sam that's REALLY gay - suggestive tag for future just in case(?) I doubt it'll ever be used but it doesn't hurt to have a warning

morts sad time - vent tag

If you're interested in my works or talking outside my Tumblr, my socials are below!

Discord: hamsamwich23

Instagram: hamsamwich23

Wattpad: hamsamwich23

SquidgeWorld: hamsamwich23

And most importantly...

This blog stands with the people of Palestine, Congo, Sudan, and the many other countries that are suffering and struggling right now. Below me is a post linking to resources to help these countries and more.

This master document was originally created by Seaweedlagoon on Twitter/"X" and reposted on Tumblr by user eggyolkperona3000

Thank you for reading!!

[bellaxgiornata]

Caught in the Undertow [Chapter One]

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Original Female Character

Summary: Eight months ago Emily Diehl moved from Hell’s Kitchen to the Upper West Side as her wedding photography business successfully took off. But between her recent, traumatic break up with an ex who won't leave her alone and her increased workload, she's lost touch with her friends, family, and herself. Struggling through grief and depression, Emily ends up confiding in one of her best friend's and former crush along with her old neighborhood's mysterious vigilante, Daredevil–though Emily doesn't realize the two are one in the same. Every day she is left wondering what it will take to find herself again. And as she slowly finds her way back, she's beginning to wonder just why Daredevil cares so much...

Warnings/tags: 18+ for this series; contains fluff, angst, domestic violence, depression, PTSD, smut

Word Count: 8k

a/n: Slowly posting one of my angsty Matt Murdock x OFC stories over to tumblr to see if there is interest. The first eighteen chapters are already written and this story is almost finished. Feel free to leave feedback so I know how interested y'all are in more of this one! You can find the entire list of chapters for this series here.

Balancing the heavy bag on my shoulder as I leant forward, I shoved the spare key into the lock and turned it, hearing the telltale click as the door unlocked. Straightening, I opened the apartment door and was immediately greeted with Ezra's voice calling out from his bedroom. 

"I left some pasta in the fridge," he told me.

I grinned, shutting the front door behind me before holding a hand against the wall as I kicked out of my uncomfortable heels. "You're a saint!" I called back.

I pulled the heavy camera bag from my sore shoulder and set it on the little kitchen table, rubbing the ache it had left behind absently as I crossed the small space to the fridge. I pulled the door open, my eyes widening happily when I spotted the bowl of spaghetti covered with a piece of plastic wrap. Hungrily, I pulled it out, ripping off the covering before opening a nearby drawer and finding a fork. Wasting no time, I swirled a forkful of pasta and shoved it in my mouth, my eyes closing as I chewed.

"You didn't even heat it up first?" Ezra's horrified voice rang through the kitchen. 

My eyes flew open and I saw my brother standing at the end of the hallway with a disturbed expression on his face as he watched me eat. His nose wrinkled further as he saw me shovel another forkful of pasta ungracefully into my mouth.

I shrugged a shoulder at him. "What?" I asked around the mouthful of pasta. "I'm starving."

"You're an animal," he said with a chuckle.

I kicked his shin as he stepped beside me, reaching up to pull out a glass before filling it in the sink. He set it on the counter next to me and gestured to it with his head.

"Drink," he ordered. "I know you don't get a chance to drink nearly enough during wedding days."

I swallowed another bite of pasta before mumbling, "Or eat enough."

I picked up the glass, ignoring how Ezra was staring at me from his place beside me at the kitchen counter, and chugged the entire glass in one go. He rolled his eyes and picked up the empty glass, returning to the sink and refilling it for me as I swirled a massive amount of pasta onto my fork again. 

"Animal," he muttered in amusement. 

"Shut up," I responded as I chewed.

"So you're finally gracing Hell’s Kitchen with your presence tonight?" my brother asked as he got himself a glass of water.

I continued shoveling the pasta down, rolling my eyes. "I told you I was coming out tonight. Marci invited me the other week." I chewed quickly as I brought the now empty bowl to the sink, rinsing it out thoroughly before shooting Ezra a look over my shoulder. "Dishwasher dirty?" I asked him. When he nodded, I pulled it open, placing the bowl inside. "I'm going to Josie’s tonight to see everyone. It's been…too long." I closed the dishwasher, straightening and glancing at him. "You were invited too."

I headed over to my camera bag, grabbing the lipstick from an outside pouch and ignoring the curious expression on his face. I made my way down the short hall to the bathroom, flipping on the light and checking my appearance in the mirror.

"We haven't been to Josie’s in forever," Ezra said, appearing abruptly as he leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom. "And why the hell would Marci Stahl be at Josie’s?"

I paused, shooting him a pointed look through his bathroom mirror as I touched up my makeup. "She's dating Foggy now, remember? And that was Foggy and Matt's go-to bar." My eyes darted back to myself in the mirror, capping the dark red lipstick and running my hand through the dark curls that had fallen from a long day of work. "She said the four of them go every Wednesday, Friday, and most Saturday nights when I ran into her the other weekend at Cece's wedding. But I've been too booked the past two weeks to meet them there."

He shot me another curious look, arms crossing over his chest. "You hate going out after working a full wedding, though."

"Yeah, well," I said, turning around with a huff and leaning my hip against the bathroom counter. "I haven't seen them in forever. I've been so busy building up this business ever since I moved out of Hell's Kitchen that I've neglected my social life. I miss Karen, Marci, Foggy, and Matt. And ," I told him firmly, "I'm sleeping on your couch tonight. So I don't have to go far after."

Ezra's expression suddenly perked up, his back straightening. "Wait, Karen's going to be there?" he asked immediately.

I rolled my eyes, making my way past him and slapping his shoulder as I went. "Yeah, lover boy. Maybe don't get too drunk tonight and ruin your time with her, huh?"

I heard Ezra scoff as he followed me down the hallway towards the front door. "You're one to talk."

I frowned, turning on my heel in the space between the kitchen and living room, shooting him a glare. "And what's that supposed to mean?"

He rolled his eyes at me now, a grin on his lips. "Oh come off it already. You've had a crush on Matt Murdock since day one ," Ezra pointed out. "If you hadn't been so off and on with that asshole Justin you'd have jumped Matt long ago." He smirked, stepping closer to me to ruffle my hair and laughing when I roughly swatted him away. 

I frowned as I tried to fix the hair Ezra had just mussed, feeling my heart lurch at the mention of my ex. It was not a topic I liked to dwell on.

"Yeah well, he's old news," I said solemnly, trying to slip my heels back on. I winced as the first one cut back into my already sore and aching foot. "And Matt and I are just friends. Always have been." I slipped my other foot into the black heel and closed my eyes, cringing at the pain. I let out a slow breath before turning back to my brother, watching as he slid his worn out Van's on his feet. "And you know I'm not dating right now."

"Right," he said, raising two fingers on each hand to air quote, "you're taking 'a sabbatical from all men.' I give it another month, Em." He pointed a firm finger at my chest. "And that's being generous ."

I slapped his hand away roughly, annoyed. "Let's just go."

I grabbed the small purse I had tucked into my camera bag for tonight, slipping it over my head before turning to the front door where Ezra was waiting with it open. We walked down the hallway together toward the elevator at the end. The back of my heels dug further into my feet with each step but I tried to ignore the pain. The moment I pushed the elevator call button, Ezra slung his arm over my shoulder. 

"Sorry about bringing up Justin," he apologized softly. "I know it's a…sore spot. I shouldn’t have." I grunted grumpily in response and he lightly shook my shoulders. "You going to be okay?"

I turned my head, eyeing him for a moment. He was staring back at me with worry in his eyes, his mouth pulling down at one corner. Ever since he'd gotten the call when I was in the hospital a few months back he had noticed something was off about me despite my attempts to hide it.

"Yeah," I lied easily as the elevator doors opened. His arm slipped back to his side as I stepped in with him following close beside me. Pushing the button for the first floor, I told him, "My biggest concern right now is walking around the corner in these heels without accidentally slicing a foot off."

Ezra glanced down at my choice of footwear before shaking his head. "I will never understand why you women torture yourselves."

"For fashion," I told him simply. "And it makes our asses look good."

He snorted, slinging his arm back over my shoulders as the doors opened and we exited, making our way towards the apartment building’s main doors.

"Well your ass is going to stick out like a sore thumb at Josie’s dressed like that," he snickered.

I elbowed him in the ribs, grinning when he hissed in a sharp breath. "I just finished working a thirteen hour day, on my feet in heels, toting around heavy camera equipment, at the beck and call of a bridezilla," I retorted testily. "I haven't had a night out for fun in months and I didn't have time or energy to drag my ass to the Upper West Side for a change of clothes."

"You and your fancy apartment," Ezra grumbled, rubbing his rib with his free hand where I had elbowed him. 

"You're just jealous," I shot back.

"Certainly not of your rent," he mumbled. "Should be illegal to charge that."

"Yeah, well, people apparently pay a lot for wedding photographers in the city," I muttered.

"And you're working yourself to death," he told me, pulling the building's main doors open and letting me pass through first. "Seriously, Em, do you even sleep anymore?"

"I'm fine," I answered sharply.

The sharpness of my words had abruptly cut off all conversation as we began the three minute walk around the corner to Josie’s. The night had cooled off a bit and the slight breeze felt good as we walked. I was glad for the silence, even if it was a bit tense, as we walked towards the bar together. I wasn't in the mood for his questions and scrutiny after the long day I'd had.

The truth was I wasn't fine. I hadn't been fine since I'd left Hell's Kitchen eight months ago. I was working myself to death but it was intentional. I was a level of tired I didn't know could exist because of the break up I'd had with Justin four months ago. I didn't like to let my brain have a chance to think or remember anything about what had happened between us back then, but I was admittedly quickly becoming too overwhelmed with work. 

I hadn’t told Ezra much about the break up either because I hadn't been able to bring myself to fully talk about it yet. If I thought about things too closely, my chest felt like it was constricting and the permanent ache there would only intensify. There was a knot in my stomach that wouldn't disappear, either; it sat heavy as a constant reminder that twisted and pulled anytime I thought about that night .

So I didn't want to think about that tonight; I didn’t want to have an anxiety attack because I’d had enough of them alone in my apartment over the past few months. I missed my friends and I was hoping some semblance of normalcy would have me feeling more like myself–or at least better .

When Josie’s came into view just a minute later, the red neon sign on the window out front casting its glow on our faces, I smiled softly. We’d spent many a night here over the past couple of years, whether it was just Karen, Matt, Foggy and I, or whether Ezra and Marci had joined us as well. We’d come here to celebrate many personal victories or drown out our stresses and struggles. For a long time it had been like a second home to me.

Ezra, ever the gentleman, stepped ahead of me, holding the door to the bar open. The sound of classic rock and the faint smell of beer and mold hit my nose the moment I stepped inside. The dim light cast from multiple rope lights around the ceiling and scattered neon signs cast a hazy glow around Ezra and I as we made our way straight to the bar, my heels clicking loud and out of place against the sticky cement floor. 

Josie spotted us immediately, placing a beer roughly in front of a man sitting at one of the stools before she wandered over. She smirked at me, a little glint behind her eye.

“Haven’t seen your smartass around here in awhile,” she said with a laugh.

I grinned, leaning my arms against the counter before cringing, having accidentally leaned into a damp spot. Josie slid some napkins towards me as I removed my arms and I gratefully wiped the booze off of me.

“Forgot how charming you could be,” I teased. 

She shot me a wink before her eyes passed over the pair of us. “What are you drinking tonight?”

“Two beers, the usual,” I told her, slapping some cash on the counter.

She grabbed the cash and wandered back down the bar to get our drinks. A loud noise almost akin to a squeal erupted behind me and I jumped, turning on the spot and causing the back of one of my heels to painfully dig further into my foot.

“Marci said you might come out tonight!” Karen shrieked excitedly.

She immediately darted forward, wrapping her arms around my neck and roughly pulling me in for a hug. My hands flew up around her waist to return the gesture. When she pulled back she was smiling wide before her attention shifted to Ezra who was handing me my beer.

“Ezra, we haven’t seen you out here in awhile either,” she said, lightly slapping his arm.

I swore I saw my brother blush as he half-shrugged. “Didn’t know you all still came out here,” he told her.

“Of course we do!” she said.

She grabbed me by the arm and began dragging me across the bar to a table where I could see Foggy seated beside Marci and who I assumed from the back of their head was Matt next to what must have been Karen’s seat. Marci was bouncing up and down in her seat, waving excitedly as I made my way over. Foggy shot me a large smile when our eyes locked as Karen continued to drag me over. When we were a table away, Marci slid off of her chair and rushed over towards me, pulling me into a hug much like Karen had.

“I didn’t think you were ever going to come back out and see us!” she told me.

A pang of guilt hit me hard at her words. “Sorry I just…I’ve been literally swamped with work. I just finished a thirteen hour day but decided I’d come out since I was going to be passing through Hell’s Kitchen.”

“Thirteen hours?” Marci asked, entirely appalled at the idea.

“Shit, take my seat,” Karen said, ushering me into the chair beside Matt.

I slid into the wooden chair, grateful I was no longer standing on my very tired and sore feet. Matt turned towards me in his seat, a small smile on his lips as his knees lightly bumped mine under the table. My heart gave a little lurch in my chest at the sight of him before me. He still looked good, even with the few cuts along his face, as he sat there in a dark gray tee-shirt that hugged his arms and chest just right as his red-tinted glasses stared back at me.

“It’s been awhile,” Matt said, his voice soft.

I nervously tucked a strand of hair behind my ear as I nodded. “Yeah,” I admitted, voice low. “I uh…maybe underestimated what I was getting myself into.”

“So what’s life like in the Upper West Side?” Foggy cut in, leaning dramatically forward on the table towards me. 

“Shit, you must have a nice apartment,” Marci said as she resumed her place beside Foggy.

I frowned, realizing I’d never had a chance to invite them out after I’d moved. What kind of shit friend had I been lately? Guilt sat heavy in my gut next to the beer I began drinking down.

“Yeah I never really did a housewarming, did I?” I mused lightly, setting my bottle back onto the table.

“No, but you still can,” Marci pointed out.

I noticed the narrowed glare Karen sent to her from her place beside my brother at the end of the table. I caught Marci mouth back a ‘what?’ in response.

“You know what, I’ll set something up,” I told them. “My schedule clears up a bit in a few weeks. I can stop being such a shit friend.”

“You haven’t been a shit fri–”

I held up a hand, immediately cutting Foggy short. “Yeah, I have,” I told him. “And I’m sorry. If I hadn’t run into Marci the other week at that wedding, I don’t know if I’d have seen you all again. Felt like…too much time passed for me to reach out.”

“Absolutely not,” Karen said firmly, shaking her head. “You’ll always be one of us.”

“One of us, one of us,” Foggy jokingly chanted from across the table.

Marci sharply turned her head, shooting him a look. I grinned, my eyes darting down to the table as my fingers fiddled with the beer bottle in front of me. 

“If it makes you all feel any better,” Ezra said, holding his beer to his lips, “I’m her brother and I barely saw her too.”

I shot him a look, my eyes narrowed.

“So I take it the photography is going well?” Matt asked from beside me, catching my attention.

“Too well,” I told him. “I had a hard time saying no at first if I had dates available. Ended up way overbooking myself. Still trying to learn what a healthy work-life balance looks like but I think in a few weeks, when my weddings thin out to a realistic amount, I’ll be in a better place. Work-wise at least.”

Foggy cleared his throat, his fingers tapping lightly against the glass he was drinking out of as he spoke. “Soo,” he began, dragging the word out hesitantly, “are you and…Justin still a thing?”

My eyes immediately dropped back down to my hands on the table, fingers spinning the bottle nervously in front of me. “No,” I answered quietly before grabbing the bottle and taking a long drink.

I saw Foggy glance at Matt beside me before he straightened up further, his eyebrows creasing together. “You mean, for real this time?” he asked.

I swallowed hard, forcing a tight smile on my face as I met his eyes. “Yeah,” I answered simply. “So how long have you and Marci been an actual thing?” I asked, very obviously trying to change the subject.

The two turned to look at each other, the look of pure adoration and affection in their eyes making my heart hurt. I tried to keep the smile on my face as Foggy flung his arm over her shoulder and turned back to me.

“A few months now,” he told me.

“We already sort of were,” Marci said, “So I figured I’d finally let him take me on an official first date.”

“She hasn’t been able to get rid of me since,” Foggy finished for her, a proud smile on his face.

“I had a feeling it was just a matter of time,” I told them, smiling lightly. My attention shifted as I turned a bit in my chair, my eyes darting between Karen and Matt. “What about you two?” I asked. “Any relationships I missed out on?”

Karen shook her head, her eyes briefly glancing to my brother beside her as her cheeks reddened. My eyebrow rose curiously at the sight. Was she interested in him too? She'd never mentioned that to me before.

“No dates,” she told me with a slight shrug. “Just been busy with The Bulletin. Haven’t had time to meet anyone.”

“I’ve been meaning to tell you, I love your articles,” I told her quickly. “I search for them in every issue. I think you found your calling with journalism.”

She blushed, murmuring a ‘thanks’ before my eyes slowly dropped to Matt beside me. He was tapping a finger against his beer bottle. 

“And, what about you, Matt?” I asked, my voice sounding a little tight as I asked. 

His head turned in my direction, his glasses reflecting my own anxious face back to me. He smiled a little before he shook his head lightly.

“No,” he told me. “It’s uh…it’s just me.”

Something about the way he responded made my heart twist a little. But I didn’t have much time to dwell on that before Foggy was loudly cutting in.

“He’s a perpetual bachelor, the bastard,” he told me. 

I nodded, a pained smile on my face as I said, “Well I guess some things never change, right?”

The corner of Matt’s lips turned down as he averted his attention back to his drink. I caught the curious arch of Ezra’s brow behind Matt’s now downturned head. He shot me a pointed look before his eyes roughly shifted to Matt and back to me. I very slightly shook my head, swiftly turning my attention to my drink.

The night carried on as we all caught up, ordering more rounds of drinks for the table as time wore on. Eventually it began to feel like I’d never disappeared for eight months with how much we all were suddenly joking, laughing, and teasing one another. It felt good. It was the most I’d laughed in a long time.

“Well I need to get home,” Karen eventually said as she placed her empty beer bottle on the table. “I’ve got an article to submit in the morning.”

“I’ll walk you,” Ezra quickly offered, downing his drink.

I grinned, watching the blush rise to Karen’s cheeks as she accepted his offer.

“You’re just going to let your sister walk home this late at night alone?” Foggy teased him.

Ezra shrugged, waving a hand at me. “She can walk around a corner, right?”

“I’ll be fine,” I assured Foggy. “If anyone gets too close I’ll stab them with one of my heels.”

Ezra wandered towards me, clapping a hand to my back proudly and saying, “That’s my baby sis.”

I slapped his hand off with a laugh, shooing him away after Karen. I mouthed ‘good luck’ to him and shot him a thumbs up as he left. When they were out of sight, I turned back, taking another pull of my beer.

“They’re totally hooking up,” Marci said abruptly.

I choked on the drink I was taking, coughing for a moment. Matt’s large hand patted me roughly on the back.

“Gross, that’s my brother,” I said when I’d regained my composure.

“And Karen’s been into him for forever,” she said, downing the rest of her drink. “Just like you–”

My eyes went wide and I kicked her quickly under the table. She abruptly stopped, her own eyes going wide. I shook my head as Foggy suddenly narrowed his eyes between the two of us.

“You know what? I’m drunk,” she said suddenly, turning to Foggy. “We should probably go home, babe.”

"Uh, yeah, sure…" he said apprehensively as his eyes slid over to Matt.

I cleared my throat quickly as I said, "I should probably get back to Ez's. I'm pretty tired after today anyway."

I picked up my third beer, downing it quickly before placing the empty bottle on the table and sliding off of the chair. I winced the moment my feet touched the floor, the fresh cuts reopening on my feet as I hissed. 

Matt was on his feet quickly, somehow finding my elbow and gripping it lightly in his hand. His head dipped towards me as he asked, "You okay?"

"Just my feet killing me," I told him, still grimacing. "It's fine."

Marci rounded the table, pulling me into a hug as Matt released my arm. "Thanks for coming out. I missed you, girl." She leaned closer to my ear, whispering, "Sorry I almost outed your secret."

I pulled back, smiling sheepishly at her. "I missed you too. I'll have to come out again."

"Yes, we're here most of the week with the ladies," Foggy told me, throwing his arm back around Marci. "Sometimes Matt and I swing by after work though, if you're ever around." He shot me a serious look as he said, "So don't be a stranger."

I gave Foggy a hug goodbye and promised I'd be back out again soon. When he and Marci took off, I was very aware of the fact that I was now alone with Matt. I bit my lip nervously, feeling my palms sweat as Matt turned towards me, a small smile on his face. 

"I guess–"

"I can–"

We both spoke at the same time, pausing awkwardly when we realized the other was about to speak. I tucked a strand of hair nervously behind my ear, feeling more awkward around Matt after months of having not seen him.

"I was going to say I could walk you home," Matt said, an almost shy smile on his face as he scratched the back of his neck with one hand. 

"Oh, uh, you don't have to," I assured him. "It's literally around the corner."

"I'd feel better if you didn't walk alone this late at night," he told me. 

"Okay," I agreed in a soft voice.

Matt grabbed his folded up cane from off of the table. I watched silently as he unfolded it before I stepped towards him, wordlessly grabbing his hand and bringing it to the inside of my elbow as I had done so many times in the past. For some reason this time I was more aware of the warmth of his hand as it wrapped around my bare skin.

My eyes flew to his mouth as his tongue darted out along his lips, wetting them. 

“You ready to go?” he asked me.

I had to force my eyes away from his lips, clearing my throat lightly. “Yeah, I uh…didn’t bring much,” I told him.

I began to lead him out of the bar, the sound of his cane tapping along the floor almost matching the sound of my heels as we walked. My palms were beginning to sweat as his shoulder bumped up against mine when we exited through the door.

"I hope I'm not making you uncomfortable," Matt said as we stepped outside. 

I glanced over at him as he turned to face me, his head tilted a bit in my direction. I couldn't quite make out his expression behind the dark glasses.

"What?" I asked him, brows furrowing at his comment.

"You seem uncomfortable," he told me.

I hesitated, my eyes darting to the sidewalk as we walked. With how bad my feet hurt, I was sure there was going to be blood in my shoes. I'd need to leave a comfortable pair in the future at Ez's.

"I just…feel like an ass," I admitted uncomfortably after a moment.

"Why?" he asked curiously.

"I should have stayed in touch with you all," I began, the words abruptly spewing out of my mouth. And suddenly I was spilling my guts to Matt like no time had passed at all; he had somehow always had that effect on me since I'd known him. "I've been a shit friend. I've just…I've had a lot going on and I've been intentionally keeping myself busy to avoid having to deal with anything else in my life. And you were one of my best friends and you didn't deserve that, and now here you are being nice and wanting to walk me to my brother's place even though it's literally a three minute walk and I just…I don't deserve that."

Matt paused abruptly on the sidewalk, causing me to come to a stop at his side. I saw his brows dip down beneath his glasses as he looked back at me. The streetlights above us cast his face in a warm wash of yellow and I became all too aware of his hand holding my arm again.

"Sorry, that was a lot," I apologized softly. 

He raised his hand with his cane, adjusting the glasses briefly on his face as he nodded, chuckling a little. 

"Yeah…just a bit," he said. "I wished you'd stayed in touch," he admitted. "We all do. We missed you. … I missed you, Em." 

"I'm sorry," I apologized again.

He hesitated as he looked towards me, the hand holding the crook of my elbow giving a light squeeze. I felt the knot in my stomach tighten, suddenly sure Matt could see straight through me.

"Are you okay, Em?" he asked carefully.

My eyes dropped down to the space between us on the sidewalk, the ache in my chest coming back. 

"Yeah," I told him–a blatant lie.

A deep frown crossed his lips as his head dipped down towards the sidewalk. He stared down at the pavement for a moment before he shook his head suddenly.

"Don't lie to me, Em," he said, his head rising back up. "You've been off all night. There's an edge to your voice that's not usually there. I’ve known you long enough to know when somethings wrong. You know you can always talk to me, right?"

"It's just stress," I told him quickly. "I'm fine."

He didn't answer, instead he stared at me with a pained expression on his face for a long while. Eventually I exhaled sharply, unsure of how he always knew when I was lying about anything important.

"Fine, I'm not okay," I admitted quietly. "But I don't want to talk about it."

The frown remained a permanent fixture on his face as he pulled me forward, tugging on my elbow. We began walking again and I spotted Ezra's building just a few buildings over. Matt was silent as we neared it and I eventually had to pull him to a stop.

"This is Ez's," I told him softly. 

Matt removed his hand from my arm, holding his cane between both of his hands now as he looked towards me.

"You know you used to tell me everything," he said, hurt in his tone. “We were best friends.”

I swallowed hard, looking at the building behind him. It was too hard to look at his face right now, not with the way he was looking at me.

"It's not…not a conversation I want to have right now, Matt," I told him weakly. 

He nodded slowly, taking a step back. My heart hurt at the visible space he placed between us.

"Do you…want me to get you a cab?" I asked him awkwardly.

"No, I know my way home from here," he assured me. "I guess I'll see you next time you come out, Em."

"Yeah," I said, voice strained.

"Goodnight, Em," he said, turning and heading off, cane tapping along the sidewalk as he went.

"Goodnight, Matt," I whispered at his back.

I watched him walk down to the end of the block, my heart sinking further in my chest as he went. With a huff I eventually turned and headed into the building, making my way up to Ezra's apartment.

°•°•°•°•°•°

I had tossed and turned for an hour on Ezra's uncomfortable leather sofa after he had returned from walking Karen home. His faint snores were audible down the hall; he'd fallen asleep almost the moment he'd lain down. He'd always been like that though, always falling asleep the moment his head hit the pillow. Ever since we were kids. I'd often wondered what it was like to be able to fall asleep so easily, to not have your thoughts keep you awake for hours on end and leave you exhausted the next day. Day after day after day.

With a huff, I gave up on sleep for now, the usual thoughts plaguing my mind now mingled with the look of hurt on Matt's face before he'd gone home. Throwing the blanket off of my legs I sat up, frowning at how sore and worn out my body felt from a long day of work. Carrying cameras around my neck that weighed five pounds for an entire thirteen hour day always did a number on my neck and back, add in being in heels for the same length of time and my body was exhausted. Doing double or triple weddings like that back to back left me damn near dead by the end of the weekend.

My arms were shaking slightly as I tried to rub the stiffness out of my lower back for a moment. It was pointless though, the only thing that ever helped was a few days of editing photos and answering emails and phone calls at my desk before doing it all again the next weekend. Thankfully I was at least coming to a point in my calendar where I'd gotten smart and stopped booking every available day someone asked for and instead just booked what I needed to make a living. Working myself to the bone wasn't sustainable. And it was starting to make me feel worse.

I rose to my feet and made my way to the front door, unlocking it and stepping barefoot into the hall. Just to my right was a small set of stairs that led to the roof access; many a drunken night crashing at my brother's place had found me sitting up on his roof. Tonight was no different. 

I sat down on the very edge of the building, one leg dangling off the side of the roof while the other was folded up, my chin resting lightly on my knee as I wrapped my arms around it. I was grateful that I'd left an extra pair of comfortable cotton shorts and a tank top at Ez's to sleep in in the past. The dress had been getting uncomfortable. 

I sighed, closing my eyes and listening to the faint sounds of the city below me. Somehow Hell's Kitchen was louder at night than the Upper West Side, though my apartment building was just barely a few blocks from the Kitchen. 

There was honking in the distance on the streets below, and if I listened close enough I could hear faint drunken yelling. I could hear the soft whoosh of traffic below from the cars and taxis on the busy summer Saturday night. Even the wind was louder up on the rooftop, the sound a low whistle in my ear. 

"You know it's not safe to sit so close to the edge," a deep voice cut through the night.

My eyes opened, immediately recognizing the gravelly voice even though I hadn't heard it in a long while. I glanced up to my right and spotted Daredevil in his red suit staring down at me. He looked exactly the same as the last time I saw him. His mouth was turned up at one corner in a small smile as he stared back down at me. 

I snorted faintly, turning my attention back to the street below me. "Not really too concerned about that," I answered him.

"Because you know I'd catch you if you fall?" he asked, an almost flirtatious teasing in his tone as if it hadn't been months since the last time we'd seen each other.

I hummed softly in response, shaking my head slightly. "No," I muttered. "I just don't really care if I do."

I could see him stiffen out of the corner of my eye at my words. It was a moment before he sat down beside me, dangling both of his feet over the ledge as he positioned himself a couple of feet from my side.

"That's a bit dark," he pointed out.

"Says the guy in a devil suit that spends his evenings hitting people," I quipped back. 

"Fair point," he agreed. "So what's going on? I haven't seen you in Hell’s Kitchen for a while."

"Because I moved just out of Hell’s Kitchen a few months back," I told him, eyes still on the street far below us. "Technically the Upper West Side, but it's only a few blocks from your… territory ."

"Sounds fancy," he mused.

"It is."

"But you aren't happy?" he asked, his head turning towards me.

I exhaled a long breath, closing my eyes. I could feel the ache in my chest and the knot in my stomach a little too well for my liking right now.

"You deduce that from a lonely woman sitting on the ledge of a four story building saying she doesn't care if she falls?" I shot back, though there wasn't much edge to my tone.

"That and the slow, erratic beat of your heart," he told me. 

I rolled my eyes. "You know I forgot you had weird, bat-like senses or whatever."

He chuckled softly, shaking his head. "Just heightened, not bat-like."

"Still weird though," I teased him.

Turning my head on my knee to face him, I caught the faint smile on his mouth. That mouth was all I could ever see of his face, whether he'd been in his man in black get-up or the new red suit he'd had for a bit. I'd always thought he had a beautiful mouth but it's all I'd ever seen–besides the muscles through the previous tight black shirt he used to wear.

It had been just over two years since the first run-in I'd had with him when he'd saved me. An asshole had cornered me in a dark alley one night after I’d been drunkenly bar hopping with friends. Daredevil–or the man in the mask at the time–had swooped in and beat the guy bloody before the man had a chance to do much. After that, he'd somehow often found me on and off over the weeks and months that followed. It usually helped that I had often been on Ez's or my previous apartment building’s rooftop. Apparently rooftops were sort of The Devil of Hell’s Kitchen's thing and he frequented them often. Yet somehow, despite the many late night run-ins and conversations, and occasional flirting, he'd never told me much of anything about himself, other than a little bit about his heightened senses.

"What's on your mind?" he asked softly, his voice bringing me back to the present.

"Too much," I whispered back, noticing the slight dip in the corner of his mouth. 

He was quiet for a bit and I turned my attention back to the street below us. Gently I swung my dangling leg back and forth, focusing on the feel of the wind rushing past my bare skin. It was refreshing, calming even.

 "You want to talk about it?" he suddenly asked.

I ran a hand over my face roughly, rubbing at my stinging eyes a few times. I didn't really want to, but somehow talking to him had always been easier than talking to anyone else over the years. Something about discussing my issues with a masked man who knew nothing else about me just made it easier to open up. 

"Don't you have something better to be doing tonight?" I countered.

I heard the stiff material of his armor groan a bit as he shrugged. "I think helping a friend is pretty important," he told me.

I snorted an unamused laugh at his words. He'd never referred to me as a friend before.

"I don't even know your name," I told him, turning back to look at him. "I've never seen your face. And I haven't even spoken to you in months. How am I your friend?"

He rested his hands behind him, leaning back on his elbows looking way too relaxed for someone whose legs were dangling off the edge of a building. A pained smile crossed his mouth, drawing my eye to the movement. 

"I've always considered you a friend," he told me, his voice strained. "I don't tell you who I am to keep you safe…and you've never minded too much before."

I watched him for a moment longer, curious if it was coincidence that he'd stumbled on me the one night I was in Hell’s Kitchen or if he'd somehow known. The ache in my chest tightened abruptly and I glanced down at my foot dangling off the edge of the building. 

"You ever feel like it's too much?" I asked him quietly. 

He shifted beside me, turning so he was facing me and pulling his legs up from the side of the building. He crossed his legs in front of himself, resting his elbows on them as he leaned forward towards me. 

"Ever feel like what’s too much?" he asked gently. 

"Everything," I breathed out. I ran a hand through my hair a few times anxiously. "I feel like I'm just drowning lately. Like I got swept into a river by some damn current and I keep getting pulled under. And every time I feel like I might be reaching the surface of…whatever this is, I get pulled back under. Just…drowning. In work and stress and…pain."

"Your…boyfriend again?" he asked hesitantly. 

A bitter laugh left me as I rubbed at the tears that had started running down my face. Everyone had hated Justin, and told me profusely as much after we’d broken up the very first time. Yet somehow I’d been a blind idiot thinking I was in love, too dumb to see how poorly he treated me until too much had already happened.

"We've been broken up for four months now. For good, this time," I confessed.

"What'd he do?" he asked, his voice suddenly dark and dangerous.

I glanced back at him, staring into the dark red eyes of his helmet. He looked angry even though all I could see was the thin line of his mouth and the tightness of his jaw.

"He uh…cheated," I admitted quietly. "Multiple times with stupid groupies.” I rolled my eyes. He played guitar in a shitty band, ‘groupie’ was a generous term. “He’d been lying to me about his cocaine use, too. Some things were…were going on between us,” I said nervously, having already felt like I was telling him more than I’d told even Ezra. “One night he got…mean. I don’t know if it was the drugs or the withdrawal," I told him, my voice suddenly sounding so weak even to my own ears.

"He put his hands on you?" the Devil snarled beside me, his lip curled back in a sneer as his shoulders abruptly squared.

"Once," I answered, my voice barely audible over the wind. "I was…I had been…" 

The words wouldn't come out, getting stuck in my throat. The knot in my stomach twisted, the ache in my chest constricting tighter. A choked sob came out of my mouth instead as my throat closed tight. 

Very slowly the Devil slid closer to me on the rooftop, the sound of something unfastening reached my ears before I felt a gentle weight wrap around my shoulders almost tentatively. When I opened my eyes, I saw he'd removed both of his gloves, having laid them beside him on the rooftop. He was carefully pulling me into him as I cried, tears freely streaming down my face. I resisted only briefly before I let him pull me into him; my face buried into the leather against his neck, his hands holding my upper back. My eyes clamped shut again, more tears pouring down my cheeks as I sobbed against his neck. The smell of him this close was comforting and somehow vaguely familiar, but I was too far gone to place it as I cried.

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” I choked out as I cried. My head shook roughly back and forth against him as images from that night flashed before my mind. "I can't…I can't," I repeated. 

“Hey, that’s alright,” he told me, his lips moving against the top of my head. His tone was gentler than I’d often heard him use and my hands immediately wrapped around his back, clinging desperately to him. “You don’t have to.”

For a long while I cried into the neck of his suit, feeling the warmth of his actual hands rubbing soothingly along my back as he just held me silently. His presence alone was somehow comforting and slowly I managed to gather myself, pushing the thoughts back down.

"I lied to one of my best friends tonight," I quietly admitted when my crying had calmed. "I hurt him. And I feel terrible."

"I'm sure your friend will understand," he told me softly.

"I feel like an ass," I mumbled, wiping one of my hands across my face.

"You're not an ass," he assured me.

I sighed, pulling reluctantly away from Daredevil's surprisingly warm embrace. I could see moisture glistening on his armor from where I'd cried all over him. 

"Sorry I uh…" I began awkwardly, gesturing to the wetness around his neck, "cried all over you."

He huffed a laugh, a small grin spreading on his mouth. One of his hands rose, lightly brushing across the dampness where my tears had fallen. His mouth twitched slightly but the grin ultimately remained.

"It's just tears," he told me. "I don't mind. Are you feeling any better at least?"

My head turned, glancing down at the street below. I rubbed the heels of my hands against my eyes, trying to wipe away the remaining wetness. I knew I couldn't lie, not to him, because he had told me before he could tell when someone did.

"No," I admitted softly. "But it's late and you should probably get back to doing gymnastics and hitting bad guys or whatever you do."

He stared at me for a long moment, a slight smirk on his lips at my words, but I could see his body was tense. Eventually he reached for his gloves beside him and I watched as he slowly pulled them back on. He gracefully rose to his feet before bending down, extending his gloved hand to me. I sniffled before accepting it, letting him pull me up. I stumbled for a moment on my sore feet, Daredevil’s gentle hands ghosting lightly along my hips for a brief second to steady me before they were gone.

“You should get some sleep,” he told me, that gravely tone back. 

“Right,” I said awkwardly, biting my lip.

“Until next time,” he said, walking backwards towards the opposite ledge of the building.

At the last second, I watched as he spun and jumped, landing impressively on the next building’s roof. Then he took off at a run, easily jumping over obstacles, until he was out of sight and I was alone again.

With a dejected sigh I went back downstairs to Ezra’s apartment, slipping in and locking the door behind me. A short while later I managed to fall asleep on the couch, wrapped up in the blanket and trying to trick myself it was someone else’s arms.

When I woke in the morning, Ezra was still asleep. I’d written him a quick note before changing back into my dress and shoes, grabbing my camera bag and heading outside. I hailed a taxi and found myself riding back to my apartment just before seven in the morning. Traffic was light since it was Sunday and it only took twelve minutes for me to get home.

As I opened the door to my apartment, I was greeted with the sight of my open kitchen and living room, with their large windows that gave me a decent view of the city a few floors below. Everything was neat and clean. Lots of white and crisp, modern lines. A stark contrast to what I’d had when I was in Hell’s Kitchen by far. But as I stood just in the entry of my apartment, all I could see in it was everything that I was feeling reflected back at me–everything that Hell’s Kitchen had never been. 

Cold. Lonely. Empty.

[rabtownsend]

Pinned/Introduction Post

Hi! My name is Rab. I'm a man in his mid-late-30s, based in Toronto, Canada.

I've been on tumblr for more than a decade, and have been sharing my colourful art-nude photography work here for nearly as long, but I'm also happy to interact with everyone here and use the site, rather than just dump my work here and ignore it.

Ask box is open. Happy to make new friends and even network with people who might like to pose for me, someday, if you are such a person.

If you're a fan of my photography, please understand that it is an expensive hobby, and not a profession. I don't make any money from it. If you'd like to support me at all, I recommend you use my ko-fi or patreon links on each photo-post (or just tip me here and there). There's not much in the way of rewards from subscribing, but it's just a way to support me and say thanks for the work that I freely share here and elsewhere.

Some links:

selfies are here tagged: #me

photo work is tagged: #my-photography

thoughts/rants/essays tagged: #rab thoughts

short fiction blog: @carolinelikegasoline

memory/archive blog: @townsendtenyearsago

[trunswicked]

As per your twitter I am here to ask about your modern!lyon

OH MY GOODNESS. Okay, so, I PROMISE I haven't been ignoring this ask..... I just had to put together something a little special for it!! I said I've thought about modern!Lyon a LOT, and after reading this list... you can be the judge of that.

First of all, artwork of the boy!!

Next...... everything else. This one is for you, Lyon fans (warning for a wall of text; I normally don't talk this much on this blog, but this is ABSOLUTELY a special occasion. You asked, and I deliver!!)

Firstly, our boy is – and I cannot stress this enough – a TOTAL fashion buff. His wardrobe is huge and he has an outfit for basically any occasion ever.

He wears a lot of loose-fitting stuff that kinda gives hipster/tumblr user, especially with the tattoos and glasses (lmao) but he can pull off any style if he tries hard enough. you can ALWAYS tell that he knows how to dress no matter what he’s wearing.

I don’t really have anything specific in mind that his tattoos represent – it’s a random collection of things that tapers off around the end of his forearm. There’s like, roses and thorns and swords and maybe even a dragon in there somewhere. He also has one separate tattoo on the back of his hand.

Dude’s got the round glasses, too! I’m 50/50 on whether he actually needs them to see, but I think it’d be cute if he did. Makes him seem a bit more nerdy hehe

He collects pins as well (most of which are pinned to his schoolbag). An ongoing list of them would be:

Mogall: a monster from his favorite video game (that happens to be on the GBA, perhaps).

Rose: a reminder of the twins, Eirika in particular because she gave it to him.

Sword: specifically the FE logo from Smash.

Bi heart: You Know.

Wolf: reference to Garm (Grado lore)!!

He’s also got total rich kid & city boy energy. He lives an extremely lavish life (I’m talking, like, chilling in an expensive bathrobe after a rose-petal bath, while sipping on a glass of red wine) because he’s dramatic like that.

And THAT’S because single-father!Vigarde makes some massive amount of money doing whatever business he does. He supports his son like the cool (if a little distant, because he works so much) dad he is. Lyon’s not completely reliant on his dad’s money, but he’s never had to scrape by, if you know what I mean lmao

Vigarde also contributes to his son’s college fund (we’ll come back to what Lyon is studying later) and helped him finance his own solo apartment.

Speaking of the apartment, it’s pretty spacious and has a modern look, w/ red brick walls and big windows overlooking the city (exactly the kind of interior you’d expect an art student from some crowded urban area to live in). He also manages to keep the whole place surprisingly tidy despite being kind of a shut-in lol.

The most important thing about his living space, though, is the indoor plants. you can barely even SEE through all of the plants he owns in certain places. It’s like a jungle in there.

And he dotes on every single one of them!! Instead of becoming a crazy cat person, he just became a plant parent instead…….. He is visited by a moody black cat (named after Fomortiis) sometimes, tho.

His place also has a good amount of art displayed around. Photos he took of the twins throughout the years are pinned on the wall next to his bed…. he likes to keep them close while he sleeps :)

And about the photos – he’s great with a camera, and I like to think he’s got a job in photography (it’s maybe also what he’s studying in college)! And not just that, but I also think the twins work with him regularly – it’s related to what they do for a living.

Eirika & Eph are his childhood best friends who temporarily moved out-of-country when they were all teens, btw. They later reunite with him in their 20s and it’s super sweet!!

True to character, he’s always had gigantic crushes on both of them; as an adult he’s still too shy to ask either of them out though lol. Especially because they work together. As it stands, all he does is admire them from behind his camera.

Eirika adores all of his plants – and cat!Fomortiis too 🥰 she visits Lyon as much as she can, and they bond over their fashion knowledge (Eirika is a cosplayer for SURE) and love for the same music/books/movies.

Lyon has a dozen of her books laying around his house (her recommendations). She leaves little notes in them sometimes, and it REALLY doesn’t help him think about her less.

He & Eph don’t share nearly as many interests, but they also hang out constantly. Eph is the one who drags Lyon out of his house to go do stuff together, which he appreciates (in hindsight).

Lyon’s always wanted to be athletic, charming & comfortable in his body like him, and regularly mistakes Eph’s attempts at flirting for him just being an asshole (affectionate).

But anyhow, everything else related to his character is basically straight from canon. He's a complete bookworm, knows a bit more about first aid than the average person, has a pretty weak immune system, struggles a LOT with his self-esteem, is introverted like his dad but likes making friends, and so on and so forth.

The "knows how to dress" part is probably the most important thing to emphasize here. He's one of the best-dressed guys in Magvel, I PROMISE that's true (but dw, Joshua is up there on the list as well).

So that's all I have to share!! I think more and more about him as time goes on, and will probably come up with more stuff, but this is just about every headcanon I've been rotating in my brain thus far. Hope you enjoyed this - and I hope I've convinced you into some of these concepts (like photographer!Lyon...... I want to believe 😳). He's pretty fun to imagine as a modern guy doing his silly modern stuff, but I'm sure you already knew that. This boy deserves all the love. <3

[inoppositionflorien]

Boy I sure do love people failing to understand how the nature of Tumblr creates extremely closed ecosystems, and assuming that they can get accurate data about site demographics with a poll, failing to understand that the bridges out of their ecosystem and into the other various ecosystems are very narrow, probably don't reblog that much, and probably don't realize that they're a bridge in the first place, leading to them deciding "Staff must be wrong about the ratio of queer people to not-queer people on the website because I sure don't see many non-queer people in this closed ecosystem. No, I don't follow tom-doplopsopin, the blog that has essentially no identifying information on it and posts nothing but photographs of furniture and has five thousand followers who reblog from it often, none of whom I follow or follow me because they're dedicated almost entirely to reblogging nature photos or furniture photos and I don't post those."

This is not to make the echo-chamber-is-bad comment, in fact the echo chamber is the intended and actually pretty good effect, but to comment on the fairly low-algorithm nature of Tumblr being actually far more conducive to forming echo chambers than a site that uses more algorithms.

The lack of the algorithm and the large (compared to like, a forum's) userbase necessarily means you're not going to have a great grasp on what the user demographics are unless you can look down from above, which you can't because you don't follow every blog ever, and probably have several blocked!

This is a good thing and what most people come to Tumblr for, they come for the very specific communities they want to join and ignore the others and are almost never exposed to the others, but people are very eager to decide "but what I see on my highly-curated-by-me dashboard must therefore be all there is on the website, because I am not Outlier Georg who should not have been counted, I'm Normal Georg, who should have been counted!" not realizing that the appeal of Tumblr is very much geared towards being a place where you can BE Outlier Georg and find community with other Outliers Georg.

This is why user polls will never be even remotely accurate when they try to get a general picture of the userbase unless they target something that's invariant across the communities it reaches. They have to hop between communities, many of which will never reblog a poll on principle because they're entirely dedicated to like, photography or motivational quotes or something.

The point is Staff is almost certainly correct about the demographics, or at worst, not undercounting nearly as much as people seem to think. It is technically possible that many of the people Staff assumes to be not queer are, in fact, queer and just hiding it for whatever reason, but that's irrelevant because you'd have no way to know either.

Your community is not the world, because you built it, and you didn't want to build the world.

[astroismypassion]

I always went to your blog for source by safari but only now realized I never followed you on tumblr! Now that it’s done I’m sorry if I’m sending a lot of asks TT! I wanted to know if it’s possible to say a thing or two about my chart ? If not just forget my ask haha and have a good day!

Answer:

Ahh, thank you so much, yes don't forget to follow as well. I notice readers tend to search up for information, but forget to follow the blog. I strive to post much more new notes on astrology.

You can be very moody and codependent on other people. You might also be quite intimidating to some people and you have an air of authority around you. You might be self-conscious about your networking skills or your hopes and dreams for the future. You might have a lot of stubborn family members that can be passive, lazy or indulgent. You might search up astrology a lot at home or your mother (or another family member) could be religious or at least spiritual. You might be the first in the family to do something for the very first time. Your parents provided a lot for your physical needs and not so much for your emotional ones. You might have felt a bit neglected by your parents or even ignored at times. You might have quite a sweet tooth. You might have a younger spouse or partner or even older, well, now that I look at it some more, most likely older or 2-3 years younger. You idealize your future goals a bit, but you are also confused as to where you are going next. Before you fall asleep you might think a lot about what you have to do or your parents, your future, career and long-term goals. Ohhh a Pisces North Node in the 2nd house at a Libra degree, basically now I'm "bringing" you closer to your life purpose by interaction haha, due to how many Taurus placements I have. Yeah, so NN shows your life purpose, which means that this shows what you feel called to do in this lifetime. So you might need more alone time, but also you have a humanitarian streak to you. Might also feel like spirituality is part of your life. You might like to dance, do yoga or meditate. You might often connect with foreigners or people who live on a different continent. You might be really great at photography. You might also need to establish financial stability and independence. You will be asked to take a better look at how you approach self-care, you will need to become better at it and not neglect it. You might also have some major life lessons connected around collaborating with others, teamwork, marriage, how to relate to other people.

Of course, as always, you are also welcome to book an astrology reading via Ko-fi.

@astroismypassion