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munson-blurbs · 2 years

Note

Hi there Bug! May I request one where Eddie and FemReader are in a committed relationship and Eddie’s breeding kink has been full on big time in overdrive because he really wants a kid and the more sex the better! Plus it’s around the holidays and they keep looking at baby stuff and Santa stuff etc which for some reason is making it worse But femreader finds out she can’t have any kids for whatever reason and is convinced Eddie will leave her because of it so heartbreakingly she tells him what’s going on and tells him if he wants to go and be with someone who can give him kids she would understand? Not being able to have kids myself and giving away little things I had gotten for the someday that never will come made me think of this one. (And No, I am not sad anymore about it- it just lets me help care for the little lost sheepies who don’t have anyone really. ) Thank you 💖

I hope I did your request justice. Thank you, from a little lost sheepie, for looking out for us 💚

Warnings: smut (18+ only, minors DNI), breeding kink, infertility, mentions of abortion, angst, hurt/comfort

WC: 3.1k

Dividers from @firefly-graphics

The First Christmas

The Starcourt Mall around Christmas time was always a nightmare, packed wall-to-wall with busy, irritated shoppers. You were one of them; your husband was too busy pointing out every item he wanted to notice your misery.

“Babe, check out that leather jacket!”

“That notebook with the dragon on the front would be perfect for writing lyrics.”

“Holy shit! A collector’s edition of the new Metallica album!”

After years of dating and a few more being married, you’ve gotten pretty good at ignoring him when you need to. But when he drags you towards his next find, you can’t help but pay attention.

“Maybe we could get this?” It’s a thick, hardbound book of lullabies and bedtime stories. Drawings of barnyard animals adorn the cover. Eddie runs his forefinger over it gently, caressing it while deep in thought.

“Don’t you think it’s a little below your reading level?” you tease, threading your fingers through his free ones.

Eddie gives you a wanting look, deep brown eyes meeting yours. His expression is completely sincere. “I want a baby,” he states plainly, as though he’s simply asking for a bag of potato chips at the grocery store.

“Okay, Eds,” you snort, rolling your eyes. “Maybe Santa will leave one under the tree for you this year.”

“I’m serious.”

You sigh, tucking his hair behind his ear. “Can we have this discussion, like, not in the middle of the mall?” you whisper.

“Is that a ‘yes’?” he asks, unable to disguise the excitement in his voice. A hopeful grin stretches across his face.

“It’s a ‘maybe,’” you tell him, but there’s already a buzzing feeling in your stomach. You’ve been waiting for him to bring up the subject of kids. Of the two of you, he had been the most resistant to parenthood. It wasn’t an issue of liking or disliking children; Eddie had plenty of experience being a babysitter (well, co-babysitter with Steve Harrington) to his gaggle of misfits during his high school years. The problem was Eddie’s confidence in himself to be a good parent. No matter how many times you reassured him that he wouldn’t be like his own dad, or that your kid would absolutely adore him, he’d remained hesitant.

But now here he is, in a Borders bookstore, damn near begging you for a baby.

Eddie refrains from talking about it for the remainder of your shopping trip, save for when you passed by Santa’s Workshop. He’d taken one look at the kids running around joyfully and murmured, “that could be us with Baby Munson next year.”

The moment you close the car door, Eddie looks at you, beaming. “So,” he starts, rubbing your thigh, “can we talk now?”

“Since when are you ready for a baby?” you question, glancing over your shoulder as you pull out from the parking spot. “I’m not complaining, but I don’t wanna get my hopes up just for you to change your mind.”

Your husband pauses before he speaks; you know from experience that this is a rare occurrence. “This might sound dumb,” he chews on a fingernail while he speaks, “but when I saw that book, I could just picture reading it to a little baby. Our little baby,” he amends. “And I’m still scared, but I–I think I can do this. With you. Feel like I can do anything with you, sweetheart.”

“So, when do you want to start trying?” you ask coyly, though you have an idea of how he will respond.

“As soon as we get home,” he affirms, and you laugh at his intensity and at your correct prediction. “If it wouldn’t cause a wreck, I’d start right fuckin’ now.”

You grip his left hand with your right. “We’re really gonna do this?”

He squeezes your hand back, and there’s a slight tremble to it. “Let’s start our little metal family.”

As soon as you get through the door of your apartment, Eddie is weaving his hands through your hair and kisses you deeply.

“Eds, the presents,” you manage, but he just drops them by the couch before picking you up and carrying you to the bedroom.

“Don’t care about ‘em,” he mutters, plopping you on the bed with a gentle thump. “Just need you.” His tongue parts your lips as he climbs on top of you, knee nudging against your sex through your jeans. “You have no fuckin’ idea how badly I need you.”

You trace your fingers over the obvious bulge straining against his zipper. “I think I have a clue,” you murmur, giggling when he moans at your touch. “Sensitive, are we?”

“Sweetheart,” Eddie says, pulling your shirt over your head and unclasping your bra, “you just gave me permission to give you a baby. What did you expect?”

You press your lips to his exposed collarbone before undressing him. “Want your baby, Eddie,” you whisper into his skin. Your fingers toy with his belt buckle and pants button until they’re both undone.

His strong hands slide beneath your panties; you can feel him grin as he glides his fingers along your folds. “Y’got this wet thinkin’ about me filling you up?” he teases, and you can only nod your response. “Ready for me to cum in you over and over until you’re pregnant with my baby?”

“P-Please,” you stammer, and in an instant, you’re taking him in. His thick cock stretches you in a familiar way. You hiss at the pressure, his thrusts speeding up as he lets himself get deeper inside you.

“You’re s’fuckin’ gorgeous, babe,” Eddie muses. “Can’t wait to see how beautiful you look, all round ‘cause you’re having my kid.” He gives you an incredulous look. “I just remembered—your tits are gonna get huge, fuck.” As if to emphasize his point, he sucks a bruise just below your left nipple.

You whimper as he grows even harder, tip rutting against your g-spot and pushing you towards your own release. “Gonna cum,” you choke out. You clench around him as you finish, crying out his name while digging your nails into his back.

“Good girl,” he praises you, which only turns you on more. “I c-can’t hold out; y’feel too good.” He spills into you with a groan, using his softening length to push everything in. “Gotta make sure it takes, y’know?” He kisses your cheek as you both come down from the high.

“If it doesn’t, we just get to keep trying,” you smile, catching your breath. At the time, it doesn’t seem like a bad thing.

The Second Christmas

You didn’t get pregnant that first month. Unsurprising; it rarely happened that quickly. You were disappointed when your period came, but you and Eddie had no problem having copious amounts of sex.

But after ten months without success, you decided to consult a doctor. “Maybe there’s, like, medicine I can take to help,” you’d told Eddie before you left. Still, a bad feeling gnawed at your insides as you’d said it; a feeling that was only confirmed by the doctor’s news.

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Munson,” she’d said. “It looks like you don’t have any viable eggs.”

She’d droned on about genetic issues, but your head was swimming. It all boiled down to one outcome: infertility. Not giving Eddie the baby he wanted so badly. Not becoming a mom.

You’d practically collapsed into his arms when you came home, apologizing profusely without offering context.

“Baby, baby, what happened?” His own eyes filled with tears, as they often did when you’d cry. “What did the doctor say?”

After slowing your sobs, you’d repeated what you’d been told. “‘M so sorry,” you choked out. “I understand if you don’t wanna be with me…if you wanna be with someone who can get pregnant.”

Eddie’s eyes widened. “Absolutely not,” he shook his head, pulling you to his chest for a tight hug. “No, baby. ‘S only you. We can…we’ll figure something out.” A tear slipped down his cheek, though he’d tried to wipe it away before you noticed. “Maybe we were meant to look out for our little sheep, rather than have ones of our own.” But he didn’t believe it, not really.

And now it’s Christmas again. You pulled on a red sweater dress and ran a comb through your hair. The platter of cookies you’d made yesterday was wrapped and ready to bring to Nancy and Jonathan’s house.

“Eds? Good to go?” you call out, frowning when you don’t get a response. “Hello?” You pad out into the living room, finding him standing in front of your bookcase, looking forlornly at the book of nursery rhymes he’d bought this time last year.

“Sorry,” he clears his throat and blinks his red-rimmed eyes. “I was kinda hopin’ for a Christmas miracle.”

“Me, too,” you admit, wrapping your arms around him. You could stay like this forever, safe in his grasp.

“Y’gonna be okay today?” Eddie asks, offering a weak smile. “With, y’know…”

You knew. It has been on your mind every day since Thanksgiving. All of Eddie’s little sheep, now in their senior year of college, were back in Hawkins for the holiday. Everyone was chattering about career plans and graduation vacations. Well, everyone except for Max.

“You all right?” you’d asked her, concern written all over your face.

She’d quickly dragged you into the other room, away from everyone else. “Please don’t be mad at me,” she’d begged.

“Max, you’re like my little sister. Even if I got mad at you, I can’t stay mad at you for long.” You gave her a smile, but it faltered at her words.

“I’m pregnant,” Max blurted out. “I-I hooked up with someone when I first got back to school because I was really upset about breaking up with Lucas, and I was stupid and—and now I’m pregnant. And I was afraid to tell you because I know you…” she trailed off, not needing to finish her sentence. “I understand if you hate me.”

You were stunned into silence. “I don’t hate you,” you whispered. She barreled into you for a hug as you asked, “do you know what you wanna do?”

Max looked up at you with misted eyes. “I waited too long for an abortion,” she explained sheepishly. “Guess I was kinda in denial.”

You’d nodded, knowing all too well how easily it was to ignore the obvious. “Whatever choice you make, I know it’ll be the right one.”

That night, you’d curled up into Eddie’s chest and cried. Cried for Max, facing a daunting decision. Cried for you, trying so hard to have a baby with no success. Cried for the situation, that some people could get exactly what other people want, even when they don’t want it themselves.

You knew you’d be seeing Max again on Christmas, and now that day has arrived. It would be hard to look at her little bump, but she needed you now more than ever. You could suck it up for a few hours.

“How’re you feeling?” you ask her, attempting a genuine smile.

“Better now that I’m in the second trimester,” she started. “Not as nauseous.”

You swallow a lump in your throat. You’d risk nausea every day for the rest of your life if it meant having a baby, but you push on. “I’m glad to hear it.”

“Can I…can I talk to you and Eddie for a sec?” Her eyes flit between the two of you. “It’s important.”

You wave Eddie over, who’s listening to Steve ramble about a new car he’s thinking of buying. He nods at you gratefully. “What’s up?”

“Max has something to tell us,” you say, and his face blanches. Sometimes you forget how your infertility also impacts him; seeing Max pregnant wasn’t easy for Eddie, either.

“Sh-sure, yeah,” he mumbles, and the three of you duck into the guest bedroom.

“I’ve been thinking. A lot.” Max fidgets, tugging on a strand of her red hair. “And I realized that, as much as I already love this baby, I’m not ready to be a parent.” She takes a deep breath and blinks back tears. “But you two are.”

You sit forward. “Max, what are you saying?”

“I’m saying—well, asking, really—if you would maybe think about adopting it.” She finally allows her eyes to meet yours.

“Oh my God,” you manage, grabbing her hand. “Are you serious?”

She nods. “I want to be a forensic psychologist. Help solve crimes and keep people safe. But I know I can’t do that if I have a baby. At least, not right now,” she adds. “But I was really anxious about placing him or her for adoption with random strangers. Maybe it sounds silly, because I wouldn’t be the one raising the kid, but I couldn’t stop worrying about it.

“And then after I talked to you on Thanksgiving, I felt a little better. I didn’t have an answer yet, but just…just talking to you made me feel better. And I realized that whenever life got tough for me, I turned to you guys.” She gives you and Eddie a small smile. “And it was, like, why didn’t I think of this before? You’d be the best parents. You’ve already had plenty of practice with all of us.”

Eddie looks at you, slack-jawed. “You would do that for us?” he asks Max. “You really want us to adopt the baby?”

“Absolutely,” she confirms. “I know we have to get lawyers and all that stuff—”

“We’d cover that,” you jump in. “And we can help with doctor’s appointments, too.”

Max pulls you both in for a hug. “I’m still scared,” she admits, “but this makes it a little less scary.”

It’ll be a long road ahead, you know this for sure, but the three of you take a collective sigh of relief. Maybe you and Eddie have gotten your Christmas miracle after all.

The Third Christmas

“Nance, where do you want the green beans?” you call over your shoulder as you pull the casserole from the oven.

“You can put them on the table; should be space for them,” she answers, thinly slicing the ham. “I’m almost done with this, and we can sit down to eat.”

Gripping the dish with the oven mitts, you walk into the dining room and place it down. “Dinner’ll be ready soon!” you tell the other guests.

Hopper flashes you a thumbs-up. “El was just initiating Katie into the adopted daughter’s club,” he murmurs to you. “I heard her saying that they’re both extra special because they were specifically chosen by their parents.”

“She’s not wrong,” you laugh. “Although El’s powers help with that whole ‘extra special’ deal.” You look around the room. “Where are they now?”

“Diaper change,” El says as she passes by. “Eddie took her to Nancy and Jonathan’s room.”

You nod gratefully, walking over and lightly rapping on the door. “Is it safe for Mommy to come in, or is it a toxic waste zone?”

“You’re clear!” Eddie calls back. You hear the diaper bag zip up, accompanied by the sound of baby giggles. “This just in: Katie thinks zippers are the funniest things in the world.”

You bend down and scoop her up in your arms. “That’s only because she hasn’t heard any of your fantastic dad jokes.” Your body fills with warmth when your daughter rests her chubby little cheek on your chest. Your daughter. You still can’t get over it even though she’s nearly seven months old. Max gave birth a week after her graduation, and after fifteen hours of labor, a six pound five ounce Katie Munson was born. Once you found out that Max’s middle name was Katherine, you knew exactly what your baby girl would be called. You’d been worried that you wouldn’t bond since she’d spent the last nine months in a womb that wasn’t yours, but you’d felt an overpowering love from the moment the nurse placed her in your waiting arms.

Watching Eddie get to be a dad was nothing short of amazing. The way he peppers her face with kisses, or wakes up for middle of the night feedings, or picks out her clothes. Sometimes, he juts out his lower lip and holds up a tiny dress, cooing, “I didn’t even know they made clothes this little!”

“Let’s go get some food,” you say to your husband, bouncing Katie on your hip. You walk out of the room just as Max is walking out of the bathroom. Her face lights up when she spots Katie.

“Hi, Katie-girl!” she exclaims, reaching out to hold her. “Can Auntie Max get a hug?” You hand her over, watching Max inhale sharply.

You place your palm on her back. “You okay? If it’s…if it’s too much to see her…”

“No, no,” she reassures you. “I mean, it’s hard, but…I know I made the right decision.” She starts making funny faces at Katie. “Look at you with your red hair! It’s a blessing and a curse.”

“I can’t wait until she’s old enough to understand what her Auntie Max did for her…for us,” Eddie ruffles her hair as though she’s still fifteen years old instead of twenty-two. “We seriously cannot thank you enough, Red. You…you made us a family.”

The four of you are silent, absorbing all the love that flows between you, until Katie starts babbling and sends you all into a fit of laughter. “She says, ‘it’s time to eat!’” you joke.

And after a long day at Nancy and Jonathan’s, you finally arrive home. You try not to wake Katie when you take her out of her carseat, but she stirs and starts to wail. Muttering a swear word under your breath, you try rocking her back to sleep, but she keeps crying.

“C’mere,” Eddie says, lifting her from your arms. “I know what she wants.” He walks over to the bookshelf and plucks the book of nursery rhymes that he'd bought at the mall two years ago. He sits Katie on his lap, a big hand on her pudgy tummy. “Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall,” he starts, speaking in singsong, “Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.” He raises his eyebrows and gasps dramatically. “Oh, no! What’s gonna happen to Humpty Dumpty?” You smile as he finishes the rhyme, Katie now fully enthralled in the story. Her cries have completely subsided.

Maybe this wasn’t how you intended to become a mom, but now, you can’t imagine life any other way.

#eddie munson #eddie stranger things #eddie x reader #eddie x you #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x f!reader #eddie munson angst #dad!eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #stranger things fanfic #fanfic #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things #requests

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writing-whump · 10 months

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I love your OCS! Can I request something where Matthew is sick, but it's not his shadow, is just some good ol' human tummy bug and he's all over the place not knowing what to do? With Seline as caretaker? - 🎃

Aww thank you for the request, nonnie! My first for the werwolf story, I'm so excited. Here you go.^^

Contains emeto and mentions of scat.

Stomach flu

Seline wasn’t sure how or when it happened that Matthew now accompanied her from classes back home, but somehow it had become routine before she even realized. Since the day he stumbled upon her and pretty much tore himself to pieces with his shadow to protect her from a random threat, he basically made it his mission to be around in the afternoon hours. How it fit his schedule, she had no idea. Somehow he was simply there - and she suspected he didn’t follow his classes nearly as reliably as he did hers.

So she didn’t wonder or say anything. She didn’t feel obligated to make herself especially available - it wasn’t as if she invited him over - but she didn’t protest his presence. But evenings suddenly became their evenings, with her sitting by the central dining table connected to the living room, working on her laptop and Matthew dozing on her couch or flipping through her Netflix account. When she was done studying or no inspiration came to her for new songs - self-made songs were the most effective for magic - she would sit a few meters away beside him and watch as well.

Seline only realized how much of a routine it had become when something disturbed it. Like today.

Matthew was restless. He was shifting on the couch like he was sitting on a bee hive and he had that angry scowl on his face she associated with difficult days with his shadow. Except he was cautious with his shadow around her - they didn’t have an incident inside her apartment. As if her defensive magic woven into the floor now worked more in his favour, clearing his mind. Which was a good thing, natural thing, since witches usually provided comfort and calmness to their wolves. But they weren’t a pack and she wasn’t his witch or he her wolf - here they were just two students, bounded by a secret they never talked about. Somehow it mattered very little here and she liked it that way.

Seline was biting her lip, looking up from her laptop occasionally. She wanted to ask him what was wrong but didn’t know how well he would take it. Maybe the best she could do was give his discomfort privacy, no matter what it was.

Suddenly Matthew stood up, expression drawn and uncomfortable, hand on his belly. Then he bolted to the bathroom. Seline watched him go, concerned.

She watched out for gagging noises, but none of that came. Maybe she was reading too much into this. Would he tell her if he was sick? Wolf and witch relationships aside, if her stomach bothered her, she would rather die of emberassment than admit it. It was an intimate, awkward thing, stomach issues, so she bet he would rather be left alone if something was wrong.

You can only offer what you would like yourself. She was aware she wouldn’t know what would help him. How can you spend evenings with a person each day and not know this?

The bathroom door opened abruptly, but the followed steps were shuffling and slow. Matthew dragged himself on the hallway to lean against the wall across from her. Her gaze flickered to him, trying to be inconspicuous.

Matthew was sweating buckets, dark red hair plastered to his face. He was usually pale, but now he was glistening, freckles standing out on his cheeks and nose, his arms wrapped around his stomach. He was swaying, bending forward a little.

“Seline.”

She turned towards him immediately. “Matt? Hey, what’s wrong?”

He gulped and ran a hand over his face. “Ugh. I-I don’t know? It’s just-” he looked away, flushing, “my stomach really fucking hurts.”

“Did you throw up?” she asked, eyebrows drawing together.

“No. But it feels like my guts fucking exploded,” he threw a sheepish look toward the bathroom. Seline noted he closed the door behind himself, which he usually wouldn’t bother with. “...and it didn’t help at all.”

“Oh.” Seline nodded, trying to figure out a sensitive, emphatic way to talk about this without embarrassing him or getting squicked out herself. “You know what? I have these herbal drops that help with indigestion? They are a miracle thing, I swear.”

She brushed past him towards the kitchen for her yellow bottled drops. Learned to use the herbal things from her mother and knew a really good doctor who made herbal drops from his own garden. Her whole family used it for years for all kinds of issues. It was always her go-to before any hard-on medication.

Counting 30 drops for herself and adding 20 more for Matthew’s weight into a bit of water, she swiftly returned with the glass.

Matthew slid down the wall on the floor, pulling his knees towards himself and hugged them close, face hidden in the crook of his arm.

Seline crouched down beside him, her heart swelling up at the sight. “Come on. Drink this. Maybe it will spare you from throwing up.”

He eyed her with glossy eyes. This close to him, the smell of sickness and sweat hit her senses, and she suppressed a grimace. Matthew took the glass of water and took a tentative sip. “Hmm. Is this a witchy concoction?”

“Just regular human medicine and traditional herbal knowledge,” she snorted at him. “If it worked for them a few hundred years ago, it will work for you now.”

Matthew nodded and emptied the glass. She took it from him before he could drop it on the floor, hunching over himself.

“You will feel better in a minute,” she promised, doubting words immediately. “Come on, up from the floor. Let’s lie you down on the couch.” She wrapped her hands around his arm, coaxing him to stand. He swayed unsteadily as he got up. Better get him sitting down now, or he might not get up on his own soon.

The redhead sprawled on the couch, but then moaned at the movement and curled up on his side instead, shivering. Seline noted how he hugged his stomach protectively and pulled his hoodie up, nuzzling his face into the couch’s decorative pillow. “I just don’t get it. What’s wrong with me?”

She sat down across from him on the edge of the couch. “You have been handling your shadow pretty well lately, right? Keeping it down so consistently. Ever managed that before?”

Matthew took a shuddering breath, his bleary eyes focusing on her. He squinted against the light of the living room lamp over him. “No?”

“Well, there you have it. Congratulations! You managed to keep your shadow down enough to catch a stomach flu. It’s been going around the campus, I hear.”

“Congratulations for sure,” Matthew grumbled, huddling further into himself, squeezing his eyes shut.

Seline didn’t really have a reason or good excuse to stay beside him, but she didn’t feel like leaving at all. Shutting off the light, she brought her laptop to her lap, sitting cross-legged beside Matthew. This way, she could keep an eye on him all the time.

The noises his stomach was making didn’t get any better, though. If anything, they grew worse with each passing minute, gurgling and whining. Matthew wasn’t asleep either, hiding his face in the pillows and rubbing his stomach angrily.

A burp sneaked past his lips. Matt’s eyes flew open and he coughed a small “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Do whatever you need to,” she said. She couldn’t focus on her work at all, watching all the telltale signs of oncoming sickness.

Closing her laptop resolutely, she threw it on the nearby table and fetched a trashcan. Better be safe than sorry.

Matthew looked horrified at the trashcan, sitting upright to lean against the backrest. He scowled at her and then burped instead whatever he wanted to say, pushing a hand over his mouth.

“I’m-m not gonna throw up,” he declared, a fighting glint in his eyes. He was radiating heat. She could feel it even standing up. She cracked the window open and then sat beside him, pushing the trashcan nearer with her foot.

He glared at her and then belched. A shiver ran through him and he swallowed hard. His breaths came in short, panting huffs.

Then he pitched forward with a painful-sounding retch. Seline quickly grabbed the trashcan and brought it close, just in time for him to hunch over it. Another retch wracked his body and he lurched violently over the trashcan. Nothing came up. Only a few drops of saliva hang from his lips.

“Mattie. You are doing fine. Psshh. Just let it happen.” She pulled his hoodie down and dared to put a hand on his back, rubbing gently.

The movement coaxed up another burp. Matthew panted over the trashcan, eyes opening and shutting hard. He grimaced and spat into the bag, looking offended and angry to boot.

“I’m sorry.”

“Seriously, you don’t-”

“For real,” he interrupted, looking at her from the side. “I didn’t mean to come to your place to hurl. I never mean it and it somehow always happens and I’m really sorry. I can leave if you-”

“Oh, shut it,” she said with a small grin. “It’s okay. I’m not letting you leave like this. So stay put and get better.”

He smiled slightly in return, then grimaced. “Seline?”

“Yes?”

“I hate this.”

She laughed softly at that and leaned closer. Matthew took the trashcan from her hands and buried his head inside it. Putting both her hands on his back, she felt his whole spine shake with the next lurch that finally brought chunky liquid out. She winced as it splashed against the plastic.

A slight pause came. Matthew lifted his head hesitantly. His nose was running and there was vomit hanging from his lips and chin.

Seline patted his arm. “Be right back.” She hurried to get a paper roll from the kitchen before sliding behind Matthew. He had his feet planted on the floor, trashcan between his knees, head hanging low over it, looking helpless and lost. But he sighed at her touch.

She offered him one of the papers, but his grip on the trashcan didn’t loosen one bit. She gave up and wiped his chin herself, catching all the droplets and throwing the crumpled sheet into the trash. “There you go. You are alright.”

Matthew stayed silent, blinking hazily. Then his back arched and he was heaving again. She raised herself on her knees with his back in between and rubbed at the sweaty pullover.

When he pitched forward with a loud throaty gurgle, she sneaked a hand under his hoodie, over his stomach. Seline wasn’t sure what was allowed or not, but he didn’t protest her administrations, so she went with the feeling. His middle was bloated and tense under her hand, puffed out despite all the emptying his body been doing from both ends.

Matthew moaned against her and she could feel his stomach muscles clenching against her hand. She kneaded against the gurgly organ, which ushered a burp out and a handful of milky sickness. At least it was more watery now, coming easier.

Matthew gagged and heaved, a torrent of liquid rushing out. He was left coughing and catching his breath for a few more minutes, even when he came up empty. Then he let go of the trashcan and tipped back, unknowingly leaning against her chest. She squicked quietly and laughed. “Okay, okay, easy, big guy.”

Seline slid from behind him and helped him ease against the couch until he was lying down, propped up on two pillows. When she stood up to get rid of the stinking bag, she felt a tug on her sleeve.

“Where-...are you…?” Matthew blinked sleepily, dazed and confused. It wasn’t fair. Why did she suddenly feel so protective of him? His dark brown eyes looked like big chocolate cookies, lost in his ashen face.

Taking mercy on him, she twisted the bag shut and pushed it aside, sitting down next to his head. “Shhh. I’m not going anywhere.”

They sat in silence as Matthew took deep breaths, his chest rising and falling irregularly before evening out. His eyes slid shut and he reached out a hand towards her. Seline could do nothing but take it, holding it over his shoulder. Effectively trapped beside him.

Pretty sure he would never allow himself such a touch if he was fully coherent. But with the fever raging against him and with how dizzy and exhausted he was after the bounds of vomiting, she could see a completely different side to her gruff red-haired protector. Protector? She still thought his shadow was more of a hindrance to him, but he was getting better. This human weakness was proof.

She slipped her fingers over his forehead, pulling the sweaty strands from his face. Then she combed them through his hair.

Matt grumbled softly, sounding content.

#ask #sickfic #emeto #emetophilia #vomiting #whump #my writing #emeto writing #hurt/comfort #stomach flu #werwolf wip #hey it took only 4 days #I'm happy ^^#finally writing a bunch #Matt

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celestiall0tus · 4 months

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Tales of Bloody Bug and Chat Noir - Chapter 12 - Pharoah

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Alix ran around the new Tutankhamun exhibit in the Louvre. Jalil followed her and explained each display. She took notes before he started in on his theories to the next. She made her way to Tutankhamun’s specter as their dad joined them.

“How’s everything going, you two?” Alim asked.

“Amazing. I’ll have the best project for History yet,” Alix beamed.

“And you, Jalil?”

“It’s unbelievable! You managed to get everything I need,” Jalil exclaimed.

“Need for what?” Alim pressed.

Alix rolled her eyes. “Oh, here we go.”

“Indeed. I want to direct your attention to the scroll on this wall.”

Alim and Alix followed Jalil as they approached an adjacent wall.

“So, Dad, you know this, but for Alix, the one with the scepter is Tutankhamun the First. There, opposite, is Nefertiti, his princess. There are exactly one hundred mummies beside them. She died several years before him and the sun god, Ra, took her as his goddess.”

“Get to the point,” Alix said.

“I am. Tutankhamun wanted to bring his princess back to life by offering the sun god a new wife. The scene illustrates a ritual he devised. However, nobody has ever fully deciphered the hieroglyphics, but I have. It’s a magic chant that needs to be recited in order to complete the ritual. I’m sure of it. I just need the scepter and I can carry out the ritual.”

“I mean, that’s cool and all, but it looks like you need a human sacrifice for the ritual. Aren’t we long past that?” Alix asked.

Alim sighed. “Jalil, I love the interest you take in your study, but even if it were to work, I can’t allow you to do that.”

“Yeah. And the human sacrifice thing again. Who would you even use for it? Did you even think of that?”

“Indeed, I did. The lucky sacrifice I picked is none other than Chloe Bourgeois,” Jalil announced.

Jalil pulled out a crudely drawn imitation of Chloe. Alix snickered while Alim scowled.

“Alix, don’t laugh at that.”

“I mean, it’s kinda funny,” Alix admitted.

“No, it’s not, young lady,” Alim scolded.

Alix pursed her lips as Alim stepped closer to Jalil.

“As I’ve said, I admire your dedication and passion for history and the supernatural aspects of it, but I cannot allow this. Not only because I cannot stake my entire career and our livelihood on a potential legend, but I will not let you indulge in these murderous fantasies.”

“Don’t you see it’s perfect? We could discover the secret to resurrection and keep Alix safe. No more anger, no more worries.”

“How would this help her?”

“Because Chloe is clearly a focal point for a lot of Alix’s anger and stress. We remove that and-.”

“Absolutely not. Jalil, do you hear yourself? We should be helping Alix work through it to the point. Not eliminating the cause without knowing the reason why. Without getting rid of the roots, it will spread. If not Chloe, it’ll be someone or something else.”

“But-!”

“Enough! I won’t hear of this anymore. I want you to take the day off, Jalil. I need you to get your head on straight before you even consider coming back here.”

Jalil opened his mouth but closed it and stormed off.

“Dad, you’re not upset that we aren’t making progress on my… issues, are you?” Alix asked.

“Alix, honey, no. You are young and going through a lot of change in your life while dealing with a past trauma. It is a challenge, but we’ll handle it at the pace that you’re comfortable with. That is what matters most.”

“But what if we never find out? What if I don’t get better?”

“Sometimes that happens. Which, we just need to learn to adapt, just as our ancestors did. We are still human and capable of so much. Even if you never find the source of your anger and trauma, you’ll learn to adapt and live around it. Sometimes it’s all we can do. Much like your mother.”

“Was she hurt?”

“Well, let’s just say she didn’t have the upbringing you and Jalil have. Far from actually. It made her very slow to trust and guarded. I’m still amazed I got through her walls, but I’m glad I did. I got to be with the most amazing, flawed woman and human I’ve ever known. On top of that, we had two equally amazing and flawed children, just like we are.”

“Is that why you push me to make friends?”

“It is another reason, yes. I know it’s cliché to say love saved us, but it really did. I wasn’t half the man I was before I met your mom. She made sure to toughen me up and in return, I softened her. With me, she was able to open herself up, even if it was just a little.”

“Did Mom have trouble too?”

“Oh, yes. And I’d get to hear all about it, but that was all part of the process. It’s a slow and painful one, but one that must be taken at your own pace.”

“Excuse me, but are you the Director of the museum?” Nathalie asked.

Alim and Alix turned to the entrance where Adrien stood with Nathalie and Gorilla. Alim stepped forward.

“I am. May I help you?”

“My boss’s son heard about this exhibit arriving and wanted to visit it to gather information for a school project. Is it open?” Nathalie explained.

“It may not be open just yet, but I can allow this. After all, my own daughter has been doing the same. Uh, Alix?”

Alix stepped up beside Alim. “Yeah?”

“Would you assist him while Jalil is out for the day?”

“Do I have to?”

“No, but I would appreciate it.”

Alix considered, approached Adrien, and gave him her notes. “Give these back to me or you will hurt.”

“That’s not what I exactly had in mind,” Alim remarked.

“Sorry, Dad, but I do have to get to roller derby.”

Alim’s eyes widened. “I forgot about roller derby! It’s not a match today, is it?”

“No, just practice.”

“Thank goodness. Do you need a ride?”

“Nah, I’m good. Thanks though.”

“Stay safe, Alix. See you for lunch!”

Alix waved goodbye and headed for the museum exit. She stopped when a tall, muscular man with roseish black skin, blue glowing eyes, and decked out in gold Egyptian jewelry, shendyt, and mask. She eyed Jalil’s scarab necklace in the collection of jewelry.

“Jalil?” Alix asked.

“Jalil is gone. I’m the Pharoah!”

Alix grimaced and ran. She headed back to the Tutankhamun exhibit. She made it down the steps when Pharoah blocked her path. She skidded to a stop and scrambled back.

“You’re fast, Alix, but not fast enough.”

“Enough, Jalil! Cut the fucking crap!” Alix roared.

“Alix?” Alim called.

Pharoah turned where Alim’s voice came from. Alix took the opportunity and ran to hide. She transformed into Bloody Bug and ran back to the exhibit. She spotted Pharoah approaching Alim while Adrien, Nathalie, and Gorilla made their escape. She chunked her yo-yo in, and it wrapped around Alim. She pulled him out of Pharoah’s path.

“Go! I’ll keep him busy!” Bloody Bug yelled.

Alim hesitated, then ran.

Bloody Bug turned as Pharoah closed the gap. Her eyes widened to see his mask had shifted to a lion’s head. He landed a blow on her side and sent her into the wall. The impact created a crater with her plastered to the bottom of it. She took a sharp breath as she felt the pain through her suit. He reached in, grabbed her face, and lifted her up.

“Fucking bastard! That hurt!” Bloody Bug roared.

“Then let’s make this easy for both of us. Give me your earrings.”

“Over my dead body! Lucky Charm!”

Ladybugs swirled and created an unassuming box. Pharoah laughed and picked it up.

“Is this the best you can do, little bug?”

Bloody Bug snarled and swung her legs up. She hit the corner of the box and it exploded. Pharoah yelled as she was propelled back. She rolled and staggered to her feet. She headed out of the museum as she heard his furious screams. She got as much distance between her and Louvre as possible. She slipped into an alleyway and de-transformed. She leaned against a wall and groaned.

“That hurt.”

“This is bad. We should go see Master,” Tikki said.

“My thoughts too, Tikki. I think we should use elation. What do you think?”

“Maybe call Bomb Bee back too?”

Alix nodded. She stuck Tikki in her cap and headed for Wang Fu’s massage parlor. She headed in and found him finishing with a patient.

“Ah, my next client. I’ll see you next week,” Wang Fu said to the patient.

Alix slipped past the patient and shut the door. “I’m going to need help again.”

“Twice in a row? It’s not that one girl again, is it?”

“I’d rather that. No, my brother was akumatized into this demigod thing. He had a normal mask, then it was a lions, and then I was seismic punched into a wall with my own impact crater. Still feel the sting of it.”

“Not to mention she blew up the exhibit and scepter that Jalil wanted to use to perform an ancient sacrificial ritual. So, he’s going to be coming right for her,” Tikki added.

Wang Fu’s eyes widened. “That’s… concerning to say the least. Alright, one moment.”

Alix took a seat while Wang Fu retrieved the Miraculous Box. She lifted her shirt to check for bruising, but didn’t’ see anything. She had expected to see a massive black bruise of Pharoah’s fist in her side.

“Don’t worry. So long as you have me on, you won’t sustain any injuries, though you’ll feel the pain still,” Tikki reassured.

“Fucking lovely,” Alix groaned.

“Alright, here we are. Make your choices,” Wang Fu said.

“How many am I allowed?” Alix asked.

Wang Fu considered. “I’ll lend you three this time. Just as before, they are to be returned immediately after.”

“Well, I know I want elation and action, but what would you suggest for a third?”

Wang Fu considered, then took off the turtle shell bracelet he wore. “This belongs to the kwami of protection. I think you can guess what it does.”

Alix snorted. “I don’t know. It might take a lot of guesses. Oh, you have anything I could give Tikki to recharge?”

Wang Fu nodded. He left and returned shortly after with a plate of store-bought cookies. Tikki munched on a few before she flew up.

“All good.”

“Good. Saddle up, it’s going to be a long run,” Alix said.

“We aren’t transforming?”

“You said it yourself. He’s coming for Bloody Bug. It’d take longer, but we’d keep the others safe until we get the jewels to them. Now, in the cap.”

Tikki giggled and hid under Alix’s cap. Alix messaged Marinette, asking where she and Alya were. She waited a minute when Marinette said she and Alya were at Places des Vosages. She put her phone away and headed to the location. She spotted them with Nino, sitting on the fountain. She slipped into an alleyway, transformed, and lassoed the three of them. She pulled them into the alley with her.

“Woah! Bloody Bug? What’s up, dude?” Nino asked.

“No time. I need help. I decided to pick a fight with a god and pissed them off. You three are going to help.”

Alya squealed and jumped forward. Bloody Bug handed Alya the bee comb. Alya bounced, put the comb in her hair, and transformed into Bomb Bee.

Nino’s jaw dropped as he pointed at Bomb Bee.

“Surprised? You should be.”

Bloody Bug snapped her fingers, getting Nino’s attention. She held up the panja bracelet for Marinette and the shell bracelet for Nino. “You two have the same deal as Alya. You get these for one time, help me, and give them back. Marinette, prove yourself strong and not too soft-hearted by accepting elation. Nino, you’re just here, so congratulations.”

Marinette put on the panja bracelet while Nino put on the shell bracelet. Orbs shot out and circled them before they morphed into a magenta tiger kwami and a green turtle kwami.

“Alright, make this snappy you two. We have a god hunting me,” Bloody Bug urged.

“Oh my. Very well. I am Wayzz, kwami of protection. Pleasure to meet you, young man.

“And I’m Roarr! Kwami of elation at your service, girlie!”

“Tell them what they can do and how to transform,” Bloody Bug interjected.

“Right. You can generate a shield saying ‘Shelter.’ To transform, say, ‘Wayzz, shell on.’ To de-transform, say, ‘Wayzz, shell off,’” Wayzz explained.

“And for me, when you say ‘Clout,’ you can deliver a devastating sucker punch! Oh, and “Roarr, stripes on,’ to transform and ‘Roarr, stripes off,’ to de-transform,” Roarr yelled.

“Be careful with these powers. One per transformation and then you have five minutes before you turn back. Now, suit up,” Bloody Bug ordered.

“Wayzz, shell on!”

“Roarr, stripes on!”

“Sekhmet, give me your strength!” Pharoah demanded.

Chat Noir ran in as Pharoah’s mask shifted to a lion. Pharoah clapped his hands together that sent a shockwave that repelled Chat Noir. Chat Noir scrambled to his feet as Pharoah grabbed his face.

“Where is that wretch, Bloody Bug?”

“Couldn’t tell you even if I wanted to, which I don’t.”

“You’ll soon change that tune when I-,” Pharoah started.

“Hey, ugly!” Bloody Bug yelled.

Pharoah turned to see Bloody Bug standing atop a nearby building. He laughed and dropped Chat Noir. He stepped forward when Bloody Bug jumped down and approached him.

“Bug, what are you doing?” Chat Noir asked.

“Oh, you know. The same thing as before.”

Chat Noir raised a brow as Bloody Bug didn’t move. He stepped forward to intervene, but she held up a hand and counted down from five. He tilted his head when she got to one and used her Lucky Charm that created a simple book.

“A book? That’s just as useless as your bomb,” Pharoah mocked.

“See, that’s where you’re wrong. The book is a trident true that’s never failed me before.”

“We’ll see about that.”

Pharoah reached for Bloody Bug, but she jumped back. She hurled the book at his head that staggered him. Chat Noir jumped in and knocked Pharoah off his feet temporarily. Pharoah got back to his feet as a massive spinning top slammed into him. Bomb Bee and a cerise tiger heroine stood atop the spinning toy.

Chat Noir’s jaw dropped, and eyes widened seeing the tiger girl. He was captivated by her simple, yet beautiful tiger-themed suit that was cerise, the perfect blend of red and pink, of femininity and aggression, accented elegantly with bronze stripes. Her deep magenta hair was pulled back into a pair of high pigtails that whipped wildly in the wind. All that paled in comparison to her savage, orange tiger eyes that shone with a wild delight.

“Cowabunga, my dudes!”

Chat Noir snapped out of his trace as a guy in a turtle themed superhero suit shield surfed past him, pulled along by Bomb Bee. He tilted his head at the nagging familiarity of the turtle hero’s voice.

“Curse you, Bloody Bug! Too cowardly to face me alone?” Pharoah roared.

“Aww, is the cowardly lion too scared to face us?” Bomb Bee mocked.

“Excuse me?”

“C’mon, meow meow. Let’s see how those tiny claws compare to a real wildcat.”

Bomb Bee gestured to the tiger hero, who stood ready to fight. Pharoah shook his head and went for Bloody Bug, but the turtle hero cut him off as Pharoah’s attack bounced off the turtle shield.

“I don’t think so, my dude. You want Bloody Bug, you’ll need to defeat me. Before you defeat me, you’ll need to beat them.”

Pharoah roared and reared his arm back for another attack.

“Shelter!”

A dome-like turtle shield covered the turtle hero, Bloody Bug, and Chat Noir. Pharoah pounded on the barrier, but it wouldn’t relent.

“Anyway, will he does that, name’s Carapace, dude Noir.”

“You… seem familiar. Have we met?”

“Can’t say we have. If we have, hit me up. I wouldn’t mind this hero gig again.”

Chat Noir hummed as he looked back at the tiger hero. Pharoah finally turned away from them back to Bomb Bee and the tiger.

“Fine. I’ll squish you two first.”

“Let’s test the strength of your claws, kitten. Clout!” the tiger exclaimed.

Chat Noir watched as the tiger and Pharoah’s fists connected that sent shockwaves out that ripped apart the street. They stood even for a brief second before the tiger pushed back against Pharoah. He struggled to fight against her when Bomb Bee snuck around and used Venom to paralyze him.

Carapace dropped the shield, allowing Bloody Bug to take the necklace and break it. The Akuma flew up from the broken pendant. She caught and purified it, then grabbed her book and threw it up.

“Miraculous!”

The book burst into a swarm of ladybugs that repaired the damage done while Pharoah reverted to Jalil.

“What happened? Where am I?” Jalil asked.

“You were akumatized. I had destroyed the Tutankhamun exhibit and painted a target on myself. Now, any reason you went into that exhibit?” Bloody Bug asked.

“I… wanted to used Tutankhamun’s scepter to perform a ritual. I hoped to prove one of my theories true, but also protect my little sister.”

“Little sister?” the tiger asked.

“Yeah. She had a foul run-in with that awful Chloe Bourgeois and was nearly consumed by her rage. It sent her spiraling and I just… I wanted to keep her from that happening. She was so scared of it and I hated seeing her so broken down. I felt like I couldn’t do anything when I should be able to. I’m her older brother, and I can’t do anything to help her. What good am I to her?”

Bomb Bee started towards Jalil when Bloody Bug knelt.

“Your sister sounds like a hard case to crack, which I can relate to. It’s not easy going through life with those challenges. She’s going to have her highs and lows as we all do, but the biggest thing you can do is just be there for her. As long as you do that, you’re doing great.”

Jalil’s eyes widened as Bloody Bug saw a flash of recognition. He reached out and pulled her into his arms. “Thank you! Thank you so much! I promise I’ll be there, always!”

Bloody Bug chuckled nervously. She patted Jalil’s head, then pushed him away as her earrings chirped.

“Bug, you’re about to change back,” Chat Noir said.

“Fuck. Cat, get this man back to his home. Carapace, Bomb Bee, and Lady Tigress, move it.”

Chat Noir watched the four of them all head in different directions. He watched the tiger, Lady Tigress, vanish before he scooped up Jalil.

“Where am I taking you?” Chat Noir asked.

“Uh, the Louvre.”

“Right-o! I’ll have you there faster than you can say ‘meow.’”

Alix returned home after she gave the miraculous jewels back to Wang Fu. She managed to swing by roller derby, but she had missed practice. Her coach would have laid into her, but she explained Jalil was akumatized and she didn’t want to put the team at risk, which shut her coach up. She had checked her phone periodically on her way home to see Chat Noir had eagerly messaged her, asking about Lady Tigress. She had put her phone on silent as she ignored him, not wanting to indulge his curosity.

Alix headed for the stairs when Alim called to her. She turned as he grabbed her shoulders and looked her over.

“Are you ok? Are you hurt? Any injuries, bruises, or anything?” Alim asked.

“I’m fine. It was just practice, Dad. We don’t actually hurt each other until match time.”

“You’re talking about… derby? No, Alix, not that. I’m talking about your fight with Pharoah. You’re not hurt, are you? I saw the impact and the overall destruction of the exhibit, but-.”

“Wait, Dad, you aren’t saying I’m Bloody Bug, are you?”

“Alix, you can’t fool me. Well, maybe. I didn’t recognize you immediately. It was like I saw you, but it wasn’t you. It was… such a strange feeling not being able to recognize you from your face. As your father, I should, but I couldn’t. I likely wouldn’t have until you spoke. I didn’t place the voice immediately, but I know your tone and speech patterns. They’re just like your mother’s.”

“Yeah, you can’t hide the truth from us, Alix!” Jalil yelled.

Alix glanced over as Jalil ran down the stairs and joined the conversation.

“I heard it too. It was harder for me to place, but I caught on once I recognized where I’ve heard such a tone before.”

“Ah, fuck it. Fine, yes. I’m Bloody Bug,” Alix admitted.

Jalil gasped. “We knew it! How do you do it? Did you gain them from some ancient ritual or a blessing from an old god?”

Alix rolled her eyes and took off her cap. Jalil and Alim looked at Tikki, who was curled up taking a nap.

“Interesting. Looks like Jalil’s theory of magic creatures might have some weight after all,” Alim mumbled.

“Does that mean you’ll-,” Jalil started.

“Absolutely not. Jalil, we have to keep this secret. That means no interrogating whatever this creature is or revealing any information regarding Alix’s superhero identity.”

“So, wait, you’re not mad? And you’re not going to tell me to stop?”

Alim sighed. “I would like to, but I know you. You listen when you want to but have developed a habit of disregarding the rules. Not all, but a lot of them. I know if I told you to stop, you’d just keep doing this. It’s how you are and how your mother was. You both are the types to learn by doing. It won’t matter how much I warn you otherwise, you’ll still do it to find out for yourself.”

“That’s not always true. I listen to you sometimes.”

“Yes, but would you listen to me on this?”

“Probably not.”

“Exactly. I don’t necessarily like it, but I can’t stop you. I want to keep you safe, but I can’t always. You’re in those stages where you are becoming your own person. As much as I’d rather shelter you, I know she wouldn’t want that. She’d have encouraged and supported you, so that’s what I’ll do. For you and for her.”

Alix took a shaky breath. “I appreciate it, but you don’t have to do everything for her if you don’t want to.”

Alim chuckled as a tear fell. “Well, maybe not, but it’s how I can honor her memory and wishes. To see you both happy and strong, just like she will have always wanted. For you both to live a life where you could be yourself. If being Bloody Bug is part of that for you, I will support it and you.”

Tears fell from Alix’s eyes as she hugged Alim. “Thank you.”

Tikki yawned and sat up. “What’s going on?”

“Ah, she’s awake. Greetings, little creature. It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Alim said.

Tikki blinked. “Uh, Alix?”

“They know. My voice gave it away,” Alix said.

“Oh. Yeah, the glamor isn’t the best in this age, but we’re also not designed for this kind of environment. So, yeah,” Tikki remarked.

“What’s the glamor do?” Jalil asked.

“It masks our holder’s identity. The appearance is the big one, except it can’t mask the immutable like body mass and height. It can also hide the voice, but not necessarily the tone and speech. Which, I guess that’s how you figured it out, Mr. Kubdel?” Tikki asked.

“Yes, but please, call me Alim.”

“Well met, Alim. My name’s Tikki.”

“Likewise, Tikki. Are you by chance hungry? Is that something you can do?” Alim asked.

“She can and probably is. I didn’t have any extra snacks packed, so, yeah.”

“Not to worry. I’ll help you with that. What do you eat, Tikki?”

“Sugar. Preferably sweets.”

“Well, that would explain the boxes I’ve been seeing from that one bakery run by Tom and Sabine.”

“Yeah, I’ve been treating Tikki a little more. Plus, I had received a free box of macaroons from Tom last week for when Cat and I kept Marinette safe from Evillustrator.”

“Treating me or yourself?” Tikki grumbled.

“Hey! I get hungry too and they do have the best pastries in all of Paris. So, I’m allowed to indulge too,” Alix remarked.

Alim chuckled. “Alright, you two. I can swing by and get some pastries for Tikki. Let you use your money on other things, Alix. Just make sure you’re still careful out there, ok?”

“Always. Thank you, Dad.”

Alim smiled and hugged Alix. “Always, Alix. I love you.”

“I love you too, Dad.”

23 notes · View notes

strangerwheelerthings · 5 months

Note

Can you write an angsty hurt/comfort fic about the wheeler siblings?

Mike was screaming at her. He was screaming himself hoarse as he tried to get her to leave. He threw an action figure at the wall beside her. When that didn’t make her flinch, he stepped forward, intent on shoving her out of his room. On any other day, she would have left long before it got to this point, grumbling about her weird brother with clear anger management issues. Not now. Today she would stand her ground. She wasn’t going to budge an inch.

For the first time, in far too long, she saw the pain in her brother’s eyes.

For the first time, she paid attention to more than his words, and worked to understand where all this frustration was coming from. It wasn’t rooted in anger like she’d thought for so long, but in pain and fear buried deep below the surface.

His reaction to their father’s words over dinner had finally unlocked something. The puzzle pieces all came together at once, making her sick to her stomach at the realization. Not the realization of who her brother was, but the realization of how little she’d stepped into the role of supportive older sibling throughout the last few years.

The blindness was gone, and she determined to never let it creep in again. She was not going to sit back and watch her little brother self-destruct alone. She’d go down with him if it came to that, but he was going to know he was loved if it was the last thing she did. He was going to know that his hurt and anger at the world was justified and understood.

No eleven year old should have ever suffered the heartache and trauma that he had. No child should have had to shoulder that alone, to pretend it never happened just because some Government Agent Assholes had declared it so. No little boy should have to suffer their father’s repeated homophobic remarks at the dinner table, making him feel so ashamed and scared that he struggled to admit his sexuality even to himself.

No, none of this had been acceptable. It could not go on this way any longer. Something had to change, and that something started with her opening her own heart back up to a sibling relationship with him again.

His voice had broken under the stress, and he went quiet. She knew this was not by choice. His tone was cold as ice as he strained to make himself heard. “Get Out. Please.”

“Not yet.”

She stepped forward to snake her arms around him before he could register her intentions, and pulled him into a hug.

“What’s wrong with you? Let go of me, weirdo, and get out of my freaking room!” He tried to pull away, but didn’t quite escape her grasp. He could have, if he had truly wanted to, she knew.

“I love you no matter what. You know that right?” She tried to put every ounce of sincerity she could into those words, desperate for him to really hear her and believe. Desperate to squeeze past those solid walls between them that they’d both been responsible for.

“Uh, yeah, sure, whatever.”

She released him, and stared directly into his eyes, needing him to fully understand. “There is nothing you could do or be that would ever make me love you less. I don’t think you understand what that means.” She smiled weakly, half joking but entirely serious as she continued, “I would bury a body for you. I would create a body to bury, to keep you safe. Something as small as who you love would never even faze me.”

He sucked in a startled breath. His mouth opened, but no sound escaped. Silence reigned for a number of moments.

Welp, that was probably more than enough vulnerability for the night for both of them. Small steps. She patted his arm awkwardly, then backed out of the room. “Anyway-” she rushed out, “Just wanted to let you know that. You can talk to me about anything. Ok, goodnight. Sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite.” She shut his door in his face before rushing to her own room. She was emotionally spent, and embarrassed by her fumbling attempts to support him. She felt as adept as a newborn lamb. Hopefully something she’d done had gotten through to him.

Her sleep was restless, but when she awoke the next morning to a note under her door, her heart lightened considerably.

“You too - Mike”

|—---------Hug #2-----------|

For a moment, Mike could only stare. He was shocked speechless at the overwhelming despair in his sister’s voice.

“I didn’t know!” Nancy wailed, tears streaming down her face. He had to strain to understand her through the hiccuping sobs. “I didn’t. I didn’t know…”

He stumbled back a step when she collapsed against him unexpectedly. His arms instinctively circled her as she clutched his jacket sobbing into his shoulder.

“I- I just wanted to be a rebellious teenager for once in my life. I didn’t mean to kill her. I didn’t! I promise. Please.” She was begging, pleading to some unknown God or being to relieve her of all the guilt and pain, yet unwilling to part from it if they did exist. She didn’t believe herself to be worthy of the release.

Mike had no freaking clue what to do. He hadn’t even been present for whatever triggered the start of this breakdown. He’d found her staring at a bleeding hand, glass covering the kitchen floor at three in the morning, not moving. Her eyes stared vacantly, even as her head turned in his direction at his entrance.

“What’d you do?” he’d asked,originally more tired and grumpy than worried at the sight of the mess.

It took a moment for her to react before all hell broke loose and she completely fell apart. It became quite clear quite quickly that Nancy was not grounded or aware enough to talk out of it. She was lost in her own world of pain and memories, and it was all he could do to keep his arms around her as she shook.

His brain kept fumbling as it attempted to adapt this scene into his understanding of his sister. She was always so uptight and bossy. She worked hard at her job and at school, and he’d always been a little jealous of how well she’d handled everything since the first Upside Down incident. He’d never seen her cry. Not since she first learned about Barb's death.

He’d always assumed that she had moved on. She’d worked towards justice by taking Hawkins Labs down and then lived her life. She never seemed scared when monsters attacked. She became quieter after, in some ways, but that was all he had noticed.

The girl crying in his arms on the kitchen floor was not that unstoppable girl. She was broken and small, and so overwhelmed. He held her as the sobs eventually sputtered off to quiet weeping, and then finally silent stillness. She wasn’t asleep, that much was obvious through the tension still present in her body. She didn’t say anything, just sat there, unmoving.

At some point. He gently pushed her back enough to see her face. Her eyes were dull and unfocused. She’d detached from reality in an entirely different way, exhaustion shining through easily. Seeing her then, after truly coming to understand how not ok she was, it scared him how familiar this expression was. He’d seen it hundreds of times, not always so overt, but still plain to see. Except he hadn’t seen, had he. He’d glossed right over, taking it to mean anything from disinterest to simple tiredness. He’d assumed that Nancy’s pain would look like his, and when it hadn’t, he’d never looked deeper.

After who knows how long, he eventually guided Nancy back up to bed, before finally stumbling back to his own. His original goal of a midnight snack was long forgotten. Despite his own exhaustion he didn’t sleep, simply stared at the ceiling, lost in thought. He didn’t know what to do with this revelation, but he did know he would be far more observant of his sister than he’d ever been before.

#sorry for the long wait #I was originally going to create more of the story around these two incidents but that just didn't pan out how I hoped #hope you enjoy!#wheeler siblings #nancy wheeler #mike wheeler #stranger things #st #hints of #byler

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demigodofhoolemere · 7 months

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Collecting all of my thoughts on the 60th specials now that they’re over and there’s a cohesive overall picture, because I had many and I want to de-clutter them in my head for my own sake. Not in any particular order of significance, just stream of consciousness as I rewatch.

Be warned that while there were definitely things I enjoyed, there’s going to be a good bit of negativity in here, so if you understandably don’t want to see critiques of something you really liked, please do yourself the favor and don’t read this. I know what it’s like to see very negative takes on something you loved a lot and I know how bad it can feel as it sits with you in your stomach for a while if you’re particularly sensitive to it. Enter at your own risk. Also, I’m not looking to be argued with so if you read any of this and disagree with me on things, please just keep scrolling. This is just me throwing my thoughts at the wall.

And obviously, massive spoiler warnings here. I’ll be talking freely about all the things.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE STAR BEAST

- I’ve seen people make fun of the opening but I don’t find anything wrong with it in particular. The Doctor standing there like he was cut and pasted is a little silly but it’s not laughably bad either. I get the feeling they realized after they’d already shot the specials that they needed a recap and threw it together pretty quickly but it’s not terrible.

- The new credits are GORGEOUS and the music makes me very happy.

- I have issues with it that I’ll get into but despite myself it’s nice to see Tennant again. He was my first Doctor and his era is very nostalgic for me so it would be hard to be totally unhappy to have him around.

- That said, now with the context that the return of this face somehow has nothing to do with the Toymaker, I’m baffled and not a fan of bringing him back just for the sake of it. I really thought there was going to be SOME kind of interference by the Toymaker that would be delved into a bit when he eventually turned up, something to justify this, but no. Which means that he really is just back because that particular regeneration needed closure or something, and yeah, Ten had issues and not the happiest sendoff, but in my personal opinion it just feels more like favoritism from RTD. For 57 years, regeneration has meant letting go, and it comes across like RTD can’t do that if he has to make up non-interference-related reasons for bringing an old face back and thereby altering regeneration mythos (which he does again in an even worse way later…) by suddenly saying it’s possible for a past life to come back. I know there’s technically precedence for old faces returning, in the form of the Curator, but that was done so quickly and vaguely that it’s not invasive. This is asking us to go along with old faces coming back for *checks notes* reasons, and to give a whole new number, altering our numbering system forever, to who is essentially just Ten again. I’m sorry, but I am never calling him Fourteen. I’m resigned to the fact that I’ll have to refer to Ncuti as Fifteen and so on from there, but that’s just Ten. The only difference is that he’s got three more lives in his head that make very slight differences to his personality. Very, very slight. But it’s bugging the crud out of me that Tennant is apparently so special that it’s fine to randomly have him become himself again, that he gets two numbers, and is now being made to appear twice on every poster that has the full lineup. I am never going to acknowledge him as a whole new regeneration between Jodie and Ncuti, I’m sorry. I adore Tennant, he’s my first and I’m legally obligated to mention that I do love him extremely dearly, but if none of this had anything to do with the Toymaker torturing him and playing with his emotions or something by making him look like his old self who had so much baggage, then this whole thing is immediately silly and self-indulgent on RTD’s part.

- I know that the Doctor and Donna were brought together again because the two of them combined as the DoctorDonna could save London, but it happens so fast and without emotion. Their paths just sort of happen to cross, immediately. It’s done very quickly and in a way that doesn’t let me feel the full weight of him reacting to seeing her again.

- However I love seeing Donna again. She’s very much the same Donna I’ve always loved and it’s great to see her.

- I do like bringing back the recurring joke of Donna missing out on obvious alien attacks, lol.

- Nice that this stuff takes place in Camden seeing as Bill Hartnell partly grew up there.

- I appreciate moments like the psychic paper saying “Grand Mistress” instead of “Grand Master” as acknowledgment of Thirteen’s existence. I was worried she’d be entirely swept under the rug.

- Allons-y! 💙 That does my inner 2012 self’s heart good.

- Shaun Temple is a sweetheart and a delight.

- Gotta love throwing in one last reference to Nerys, lol.

- Donna, I’m proud of you for being such a good person that you want to give away your money to people in need, but keep at least SOME of it, girl! You’ve got a family!

- Shirley Anne Bingham is awesome and she can stay as long as she likes.

- Oh boy… pretty much everything to do with Rose feels very ham-fisted and clumsy to me. You can have a trans character without going about it like this. If the point is supposed to be to normalize portraying it in media, then it should be natural, not be about making a point. Shoving it down the audience’s throat every minute is naturally going to make people dislike the writing, even people who fully agree with the intent. I’ve already seen a fair number of LGBT+ viewers discuss this being poorly done. It doesn’t feel well-written to me and I don’t think it’s going to age particularly well either. More on this later as the worst of it crops up.

- I love Sylvia trying so hard to protect Donna by completely denying anything alien and acting like everything is normal. This poor woman is doing everything she can. I never thought I’d like her so much.

- Sad to hear Donna talk about feeling like she’s lost something but never knowing what it is.

- The Meep and the Wrarth Warriors all look incredible.

- Not a fan of the sonic basically being a magic wand. There’s a reason they ended up ditching it in the Classic series, because it was getting so that the Doctor relied too much on it, and that was before it had anywhere near the convenient powers it’s had throughout the modern series. This is a big step even further than they’ve ever taken it before and it really took me out of it. The sonic shouldn’t be able to create Iron Man HUD screens or Green Lantern hard light shields. I’m hoping they don’t do that again as the show continues.

- Murray Gold’s music is beautiful and it’s great to have it back. It does have a tendency to get too loud, though. I like to hear what people are saying.

- I do quite like the interactions between the Doctor and Shirley. She’s got a good personality to bounce off of him. I especially like them waving at each other as he sneaks off onto the UNIT truck.

- That pretty purple light coming from the ship was more exciting when I thought it was the Toymaker’s power coming to control them. Oh well.

- Love Donna’s reaction to the Meep.

- Poor Sylvia at her wit’s end. Someone help that woman.

- While it’s fitting that the Doctor has now been slapped by the trifecta of mothers from the RTD era, I’m not sure that we should still be doing gags like that where it’s apparently okay and funny to slap someone if they’re a man. The reverse would go down very differently. At least in context it makes perfect sense for Sylvia to be angry that he’s shown up and to want to get rid of him, but I hope that kind of humor doesn’t stay.

- Shaun walking in on all of this chaos like

- Nice to see the Doctor get emotional over Wilf. Same, dude.

- ^ I also really like that Kate took it upon herself to get him into a nice care home practically for free. I appreciate that she gets in touch with so many of the companions and that she’d go out of her way to help him have what he needs. I could see her dad doing that, too. I’d like to think that Yates is in the same care home (considering Richard Franklin is in real life at this point) and he and Wilf can share stories.

- Gaaahh at, “You’re assuming ‘he’ as a pronoun?” Nobody talks like this.

- Not sure the Doctor should be talking so freely about aliens and two hearts right in front of Donna and risk her remembering. He even casually hands her the sonic for a moment and shortly after starts explaining what it is. Probably not the best idea. Bit careless, mate.

- Part of me feels like the barrister wig bit is a little too silly, but then again:

- Anyone who had any awareness of the original comic was already waiting for the Meep’s turn, but knowing didn’t make it any less of a good reveal. I liked the very sudden shift.

- Shirley having weapons in her wheelchair, heck yeah. Reminds me of the Brig’s concealed gun in his cane in SJA.

- I like Donna feeling compelled to help even if she can’t remember having ever done anything like this. I also like Sylvia’s chilled realization that Donna called him “Doctor” without having ever been told.

- Lol at the kid watching the destruction from the window and not running or looking freaked out in the slightest. Boy has no self-preservation instincts.

- There is definitely some good emotion going on with the Doctor’s conflict in having to reactivate Donna’s memories, and it’s extremely well acted, but for whatever reason I don’t feel as much weight here as I should. It’s not just that I’m too disconnected from their original run at this point, because I rewatched The Stolen Earth/Journey’s End as well as The End of Time in the lead-up to this airing and I was severely emotionally impacted like I’d been thrown back 10 years in time, so I have no idea why I just don’t feel as much as I wish I did. It’s definitely not about their acting. Maybe it’s just too quick? Because I feel like the pacing of this episode in general goes by so fast that there hasn’t been enough time to really drive home the drama of what remembering will do to her, or the full extent of their relationship. Everything just sort of happens. The conflict of having to choose to restore her memories is great but the actual regaining of those memories just feels… sudden? Unearned? I don’t know.

- Don’t know how to feel about Donna having straight up Winter Soldier trigger words to unlock her memories.

- I really feel like her getting her memories back should have been a much more emotional moment between the two of them. She has no reaction to suddenly having it all back — it’s just undercut with the humor of yelling about having given away all of her lottery money, and being mad at him that there was a subconscious part of her that had his influence that drove her to do that. Honestly, I believe Donna would do it anyway, you don’t need to make some explanation for his soft heart still sticking around in her head like she wouldn’t have done that on her own. After a decade of wishing Donna could one day have her memories restored, this isn’t what I wanted out of it.

- It’s better a minute later when she realizes she only has 55 seconds left before her brain fries but she’s okay with it because it’s the best 55 seconds of her life to now be fully herself again. It’s also sweet when the Doctor is holding her as she begins to fade away, even if it’s undercut a moment later by her suddenly waking again.

- I’m not sure why the metacrisis energy in her head would split off and have half go into Rose in the womb. I suppose you could come up with a way that makes it make sense but it’s pretty convenient.

- Doctor: “We are binary.”

Donna: “She’s not. Because the Doctor’s —”

Doctor: “Male.”

Donna: “And female.”

Rose: “And neither. And more.”

… Huh??? Are they trying to say that Rose is trans because the Doctor is capable of being either male or female and the metacrisis somehow passed this on?

- I like the quick moment between the Doctor and Sylvia. Didn’t know I wanted more of them.

- The Meep’s ominous allusion to “the boss” doesn’t seem to have been about the Toymaker, so… what gives? Not that that’s a bad thing that it wasn’t, I wasn’t sure what to think of him having people working for him anyway, but I’m curious if that thread will ever get picked up.

- Donna: “Yes, we know.”

Rose: “We know everything, thanks.”

Donna: “And you know nothing. It’s a shame you’re not a woman anymore. ‘Cause she’d have understood.”

Rose: “We’ve got all that power, but there is a way to get rid of it. Something a male-presenting Time Lord will never understand.”

Okay, first off, why the attitude with the Doctor? Geez. Second, Thirteen never let go of anything in her life lol, no she wouldn’t have understood. Third, did they not just say that the Doctor is ‘male and female and neither and more’? Now a few minutes later the Doctor is suddenly just a dumb man who could never understand because he doesn’t have a woman’s perspective? One minute we’re saying gender doesn’t matter because he’s both and none, the next we’re using the standard binary against him to act like the women are so much smarter than him? There’s no need to pick on him like that, and please, just pick one, you can’t have it both ways. Also, oh my word, ‘male-presenting Time Lord’? Russell, can I have a word with you about writing sentences that sound like they would actually come out of someone’s mouth?

- ^ Additionally, the solution to the metacrisis is to just… let go of it. They literally just choose to make the energy leave them. Easy as that. That feels so incredibly unearned and completely undermines the stakes involved. For 15 years Donna was at risk of having her head explode. Her ending was an absolute tragedy with very serious consequences. And now they just go, ‘Well, they can let go of the metacrisis though’. All of the drama of her circumstances feels horribly undermined by the easiness and convenience of that. I don’t think they should have fixed everything in just the first episode of this anyway, let alone that lazily.

- I am quite a fan of the new TARDIS interior. It’s a bit big, hopefully we’ll get some furniture in there over time or something, but it’s a very neat design. I’m very pleased to have the Classic white back, but that the lights can also change colors if they feel like adding a bit more mood or character to a scene. I’m also assuming that its wheelchair accessibility means we’ll get Shirley in there at some point, which I look forward to.

- Aw at the Doctor remembering how Donna takes her coffee.

- “I really do remember, though. Every second with you. I’m so glad you’re back, ‘cause it killed me, Donna. It killed me, it killed me, it killed me.” Aw 💗

- “I said so!” Poor Sylvia, lol.

- Watching this the first time under the assumption that the Toymaker was pulling strings throughout the first two specials, I really thought they ended up at the end of the universe because he hijacked the TARDIS, and the coffee was a coincidence. Nope. Turns out the TARDIS really just broke down that bad over one spilled cup of coffee. It really should be more resilient than that!

~~~~~

OVERVIEW

I liked more than I realized, there is some good in here (Sylvia was the unexpected MVP), but for me the bad just outweighs it too much. The things I do like are generally small moments and the things I don’t are generally quite big ones, which is a problem. I’ve got a number of issues with the writing, and that’s just if the episode were standalone, let alone the fact that this is supposed to be for a big anniversary. In the context of the entirety of the specials it’s got even more problems. This doesn’t feel like it’s celebrating anything, except perhaps the original comic which is nice at least, but apart from that, it’s just… an episode. A poorer one at that, imo. The pacing is rushed and the writing is often either forced or lazy or both. It doesn’t have anything to do with the next two specials and it doesn’t set up anything that it should. Maybe I shouldn’t have expected that it would, but I find it bizarre that it doesn’t.

I really wanted to like this and I went into it expecting that I would, but even beyond the writing problems, I just couldn’t connect. I don’t know if it’s the pacing or what but I don’t feel nearly as much as I want to and feel I should. Ten and Donna are being very much themselves and they’ve got stuff here that should make me emotional, and to a degree it does, but… something is just off. I don’t feel the weight of it, and that’s a recurring problem throughout all of these specials. For whatever reason the episodes just don’t emotionally resonate with me for the most part, even if I’m pleased to be watching Ten and Donna and should therefore be more excited about it and care more about the fact that they’re back on my screen. I really, really want to care more about seeing them again. I do care, but it’s just… off. The rushed resolution to Donna’s problem doesn’t help, either. I don’t feel the emotional payoff. Part of me feels like if they were going to undermine the impact of Journey’s End by solving everything with such ease and casualness, then maybe they shouldn’t have done this at all. And I love Donna, I do, I’ve always wanted her to remember eventually, but I really feel there needed to be more to it than this. This doesn’t feel earned. I’ve got little to no emotional catharsis out of it. I would wonder if it was just a me problem if not for the fact that my sister came away from it feeling the same. Tales of the TARDIS handled this better for Jamie and Zoe in just 5 minutes — they didn’t have stakes for remembering like Donna did, it was just a cruel thing done to them, so it doesn’t feel like it’s undercutting anything to have their memories restored just as easily as they were taken, and there’s a whole ton of emotion packed into that 5 minutes that feels real, earned, and gets to me every time I’ve watched it. Why I don’t feel the same about Donna is beyond me.

I’m really struggling to understand why after just this first episode so many people were rejoicing that RTD has saved the show. Granted, I didn’t hate the Chibnall era, just select parts of it in the same way that I would have problems here and there with RTD and Moffat, so I’m not coming from a place of having felt like the show I loved was dead, but I really don’t see how The Star Beast is any better than most given episodes of the preceding era. I didn’t feel some magical shift. If anything, I liked most Chibnall era episodes more than this. I don’t know what everyone is talking about.

Thankfully the next special is a vast improvement imo.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WILD BLUE YONDER

- The opening with Isaac Newton just feels completely unnecessary to me. I feel like Russell just wanted to make a joke about changing the word “gravity” to “mavity” and decided to create that opening scene. I believe I also saw that the actor is a friend of his so this also could have spawned from him trying to create a bit part for him. Whatever the origin is, I’m not a fan of it. I really hope the mavity joke doesn’t continue past these specials, because I find it very annoying for reasons I can’t even quite place. Just gets on my nerves. And let’s forget the fact that the word gravity existed before Isaac Newton anyway.

- The TARDIS blaring the military song at the beginning and later near the end is another thing I would have sworn was the Toymaker having a laugh. Nope. No clue why it’s doing that, then. They do say something about the TARDIS playing them a war song, I guess they mean to imply it was some kind of warning of what they were getting into? But it kind of just happens. I feel like RTD keeps doing things without explanation just for fun. And there’s definitely a time and place for that, but in these specials it keeps being stuff that really should have elaboration and then they just don’t.

- I really like the massive spaceship and its design. Feels like something my brain would make up as I’m listening to a Big Finish story. The moving pieces are awesome as well.

- This is just me being someone who primarily prefers the Classic series a lot of the time, but I’m kind of done with New Who making a point of people’s attractiveness. I don’t need commentary on how hot the characters think anyone they’ve run into is, let alone a historical figure. New Who has a strange obsession with sexualization. RTD and Moffat are the worst offenders with this. Can’t call to mind times where that happened in the Chibnall era but I could be missing something. In any case I really want them to grow up a bit.

- Hey, that’s the first reference to the Doctor snapping his fingers to control the TARDIS in who even knows how long! Not that I was even a fan of that concept but it’s interesting to hear about it again.

- I like that Ten quickly stops himself from placing any blame on Donna and apologizes.

- The Doctor kissing her hand and holding it to his chest when she starts panicking is very sweet. 💗

- Woohoo, bringing back the HADS! Troughton fans unite!

- I love the robot. That is a great robot.

- I totally thought that the void outside was the Toymaker’s realm. That’s what I get for listening to Solitaire I guess.

- ^ I was also waiting for the glass that the Doctor was pressing against to completely disappear and he would fall into the Toymaker’s realm. Would make a good fic though.

- With all of the shots of Ten and Donna being watched from behind I kept expecting the forms of old companions like Susan or Steven to show up to mess with the Doctor. Never mind.

- I knew he was going to lick the strange gooey substance. Same old Ten.

- Poor Donna wondering what her family would do if she never returned.

- I thought it was abrupt that the Doctor had finished his job and already come back to Donna, but the moment where we cut back to the Doctor fiddling around immediately made it click that Donna was NOT talking to the real one, which is terrifyingly creepy.

- ^ I assumed at first that the Toymaker was faking being the Doctor to get information out of Donna. Then when the fake Donna turned up I thought they were both just his puppets he’d sent. Even when it was revealed what they really were I still imagined the Toymaker had something to do with sending them after them. Still jarred that these first two specials had absolutely no set-up for the big bad they were teasing in promotions for ages. But this particular instance is still very good without having anything to do with him. The Not-Things are chillingly creepy and I was constantly on edge.

- I like how Donna has absolutely no reaction to, “My arms are too long,” as if the Doctor would just say that lol.

- The long arms are so freakish in the best kind of freakish way.

- I seriously thought for a minute that they were turning into giant marionettes. There’s a bit of music during the reveal that sounded a bit circus-y for a moment as well. I could not stop seeing the Toymaker around every corner lol.

- David and Catherine kill it as the Not-Things. It’s fascinating to see them play against themselves in such a dark way.

- The way they look when they’re growing enormous and are appearing more and more freakish really feels like something my brain would concoct while listening to Big Finish if they did a story like this.

- I really enjoy the darkness going on here generally. They didn’t shy away from being absolutely twisted and terrifying and disturbing. It’s good to have a bit of that sometimes.

- This is seriously David and Catherine at some of their best. This special has the best stuff for the Doctor and Donna as a duo and their relationship, as well as having to play everything twice. They’re so good at making the Not-Things convincing that I was genuinely having a hard time figuring out which ones were real for a while.

- I hate the Timeless Child lore but it’s used here to good effect. Same with the Flux. I actually quite enjoyed the Flux arc but the fact that it did permanently wipe out half the universe without getting reversed or fixed and we just don’t talk about it is ridiculous. While I wish they would fix the situation, similarly to the Timeless Child it’s used well here.

- That contorted crab walk thing is incredibly disturbing even if it does look stupid lol.

- Really, how can they use a line like, “To play your vicious games and win,” and not have me think the Toymaker was involved somewhere in here?

- The Doctor not being able to stop thinking is very relatable lol. I would fail so badly in this scenario.

- I really like the design of the old captain of the ship. I’d love to see what that species looks like when they’re not just skeletal remains. Unless they actually do just look like bone anyway like Thestrals, in which case that would be even cooler.

- Everything about the climax is very well-executed. The drama, the pacing, the stakes. Very strong stuff.

- Poor Donna being left behind. But do you know what I was expecting? Naturally, for the Toymaker to pluck her out before the ship exploded so that he could keep her alive to force to play games. These specials did not go anything like I expected lol.

- Sweet Ten and Donna just sitting there reeling for a minute.

- Not sure what invoking a superstition at the edge of the universe is supposed to do with the return of the Toymaker in the next ep. He says it’s because the walls of reality are thin and all things are possible, but that doesn’t mean that pouring some salt on the ground magically has something to do with him specifically. Feels like a very weird reason to give when the logical thing to do would just be to say that the Toymaker has been plotting to get him back for a long time and finally showed up now.

- Wilf broke me. This was the one thing in any of these specials to get me truly, legitimately emotional. Shed a tear over him and his sweet face. It’s a shame they weren’t able to film any more scenes with him but I’m so glad they got that one in.

~~~~~

OVERVIEW

By far the best of the specials. I quite enjoyed the sheer darkness and madness of this one, and David and Catherine absolutely knock it out of the park. The writing is largely very good and it’s very effective in its scare factor, as well as in showcasing the relationship between the Doctor and Donna. This is the best stuff they have in any of these specials and I felt a little more connected to them here than in the other two. That doesn’t say as much as I’d like it to, but I’ll take it.

It stands up very well on its own, which in one way is great and the mark of a wonderful episode, but in another way also speaks to one of my overall problems with these episodes which is that they’re not connected to each other. This is a fantastic story and extremely well done, but once again it doesn’t feel like it’s celebrating anything and I truly don’t understand why these specials weren’t written to be a lot more connected than they are. At the end of the day it’s just a collection of random episodes that fill a gap before Ncuti takes the reins. That said, I’m not complaining about this one, this really was very interesting. Definitely the standout episode out of the three.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE GIGGLE

- Getting this out of the way right from the start lest I comment on it during every scene of his: NPH steals the show. He acts his heart out here. On the one hand it’s a very different approach to and portrayal of the Toymaker, which would otherwise bother me, but I can buy it as a Toymaker who has had centuries and centuries since the original serial to grow madder and madder and madder (and though he doesn’t regenerate like a Time Lord, I’d still be willing to believe that pieces of his personality might shift with different faces). On the other hand, there is still very much an element of Michael Gough in his darker, more intense moments. Glints that you can see in his eyes and his wicked grin. Very different but very the same. I really wish more of the episode had focused on him, and even further that he had been involved in all three of these specials.

- I appreciate the different accents he puts on throughout, as it proves me right that he just copies things from all manner of cultures he has no connection to. Vindication.

- Genuinely creepy in the opening scene the way he talks about the doll family as if buying the one doll would be separating it from its family and make them sad. You get the impression he’s not kidding. Even creepier when he says the hair on the doll was from a woman who won’t be missing it and won’t miss anything ever again. This one scene sets up right from the off that he is deeply unsettling and has done truly horrifying things to the victims of his games.

- I keep looking for Easter eggs in the toy shop and keep finding nothing lol. Wasted opportunity to have a Trilogic game or something hidden in the background.

- There’s some very dark music that plays frequently which seems to be the Toymaker’s theme. I really like it.

- Very unsettling that the Doctor’s first interaction with the Toymaker is unbeknownst to him. I like that he just stays in the background for a minute before messing with him while he still doesn’t know it’s him.

- I don’t like that the new UNIT building is essentially Stark Tower. That’s much too ostentatious for an organization that’s supposed to keep a low profile. Their building in The Power of the Doctor was already way too big. I don’t know why they seem to have gone very public now.

- I like that Kate is so scared by all of this that the first thing she does is to just grab the Doctor in a hug. Also, nice shoutout to Kate having fought Yetis.

- Mel! 💗 It's so nice to have her here. I haven't seen her Classic stuff yet but I've always adored her from afar, she's so precious. I'm always here for bringing back old friends as long as it's done well. The Doctor's reaction to her is so sweet.

- Sorry to disappoint, Mel, but you’re not the first redhead lol.

- Cool little robot guy. I'd ask why they have him working for them but they also had an alien as their scientific advisor for years, so whatever.

- Very interesting to demonstrate what happens to people's minds by turning Kate's protective armband off. Her tirade over nothing is both funny and frightening.

- The return of newscaster Trinity Wells! Nice to see you, girl. Though I have no idea how UNIT not only created but has already been trying to mass produce and give to the world these Zeedex bands within 2 days for this to even be on the news. Apparently they were an invention of the robotic character the Vlinx but that’s still a bit fast lol.

- I like that Donna was able to figure out the music scale from a perfectly ordinary experience. And lol at having Bonnie Langford sing the arpeggio.

- Considering the implication that having traveled in the TARDIS prevents the effects of this on an individual, I now want fic of every companion who's living in modern day Earth reacting to all of their neighbors and family suddenly losing their crap. Ian and Barbara watching their friends pick loud fights in the streets, Jo seeing every member of her family go mad. Not to mention the characters who either never set foot in the TARDIS at all or not long enough for it to protect them. Poor Liz Shaw somewhere, and Benton and Yates. All of the SJA kids except for Sky since she's an alien, and she'd have to deal with all of them being terrible.

- I like that they have Mel doing some technical stuff since she was supposed to be a computer programmer.

- Glad they gave a reason for why and how Mel is back on Earth lol. Nice shoutout to Glitz while they were at it as well.

- Kate really seems to like offering everybody a job lol.

- Subtle bit of creepiness to the Toymaker that no matter how many of his juggling balls he throws, he's still juggling the same amount of balls.

- I'm glad they had him already know Donna's name. I imagined he would have to but you never know what writers are gonna do. I'm also very pleased that it's immediately acknowledged that the Toymaker is an extreme threat by having the Doctor tell Donna to go back to the TARDIS the second he's realized who it is.

- Heck yes to the brief Hartnell and Gough flashes! It's not only lovely to see them in general but I love the weight that it adds, that they know each other from so long ago, and that those people are still who they both are inside the different faces. You can see Michael Gough's eyes in NPH right here in particular and for a moment I feel I can even see Bill's eyes in David.

- Shoutout to the hidden Joeys in a couple of different places. They're not nearly as visible in the episode as the set pics made it seem but I know he's there.

- Love that he means Hartnell when he says, “When I was young.”

- I like the unnervingness of the endless hallway and all of the doors just leading you nowhere. I can imagine that kind of a trick in the original serial. (In fact I now really want to see that be something they'd have to deal with. I can just hear Steven's huffy, 'Oh, no,' when they realize they're never getting anywhere lol.) The two of them ending up separated is also good stuff.

- I still don't see what invoking a superstition at the edge of the universe has to do with bringing the Toymaker in. It's a really weird and nonsensical reason to give when the only reason you need is that he's finally coming for his rematch.

- Very creepy stuff with the poor man being made into a marionette, as well as the Doctor seeing himself as one. That’s the kind of disturbing factor I was hoping for with this special. There isn't a ton of this kind of thing here and I'd have gone quite a bit darker myself for this whole episode but I appreciate what we have.

- The Toymaker looming above, looking down as he holds the puppet strings is some really good imagery.

- Donna vs the rest of the doll family is very freakish, but I also feel bad for them because there's no way those weren't real people at one point. Particularly disturbing to have Donna rip Sue's head off and kick it across the room, considering. I know she doesn’t know these were people, and even if she did she does have to protect herself somehow, but yikes.

- I love the painted stage backdrops in the middle of absolute black nothingness. I was hoping they'd have this sort of thing, since much of the original is in this sort of broad, void-feeling space.

- I really like this bit where the Toymaker is showing what happened to the previous companions that have been on the show since Donna left. Very chilling to see him be well aware of all of the particulars of these events and I’m glad they went for it in torturing the Doctor with personal pain. It wasn’t as much or as dark as I’d hoped but I like it, and I always like seeing a Doctor acknowledge companions he was with when he had different faces. Very nice to see Ten’s face talk about Amy, Clara, and Bill. Also, nice recap for those who may have stopped after Tennant originally left, and wow, the Moffat era really had a ton of tragic departures. I keep thinking what must have been going through Neil’s head reading about a character who was killed by a bird, and the various insane-sounding reasons from the Doctor as to why these characters are somehow okay despite what happened to them, considering he apparently didn’t know about Doctor Who whatsoever prior to being approached for the role!

- Oh, the shift in the Toymaker’s face when the Doctor challenges him to a game. Stuff just got real.

- It’s so good to see them playing at a table again.

- “I made a jigsaw out of your history. Did you like it?” Not sure what that means unless they’re trying to indicate that he’s somehow responsible for the Timeless Child mythos, or at least for various inconsistencies in the Doctor’s life. I doubt they’d hand-wave away the whole TC arc like that when Russell said he wouldn’t undermine his friend’s work, so I don’t know what to make of this. But if we can ignore that from here on out then that rocks.

- Poor Master, lol. I can only imagine bedraggled and broken Dhawan being offered a chance to live if he played a game, taking the offer, and promptly losing. I want to know how that went down. Apparently very badly, if the price was being trapped inside the Toymaker’s gold tooth. Also, is he aware of what’s going on or is he just sort of in stasis in there? It would be awful for him if he were conscious of everything, but awful results are how the Toymaker operates, so I wouldn’t be surprised. Imagine the Master trying and failing to scream to the Doctor to do whatever he has to to get away.

- Okay, who on earth is this person the Toymaker supposedly didn’t dare play? They’re claiming that he played and defeated God but there’s somehow someone even more powerful that the Toymaker of all people is scared of? “The one who waits”? Jokingly headcanon-ing that it’s Rory until we get anything further on that, lol.

- I mean, the Toymaker ain’t wrong about the issues of the human race in the 21st century 🤷‍♀️ VERY weird to hear him say the word ‘cancel’ though. That originated here on tumblr to my knowledge. Things like that have gotta stop breaking containment, now they’re spreading so far that a character from 1966 is saying them.

- Love the Toymaker’s aghast reaction to Donna saying he’ll just cheat. Though they make it sound like he’s forced to always play by the rules by some sort of cosmic force that binds him. In the original you get the impression that it’s just a matter of principle to him, which I prefer.

- I like that the king on the playing card looks like it could either be Michael Gough or NPH, or perhaps a blurred line between them to represent both.

- Part of me feels like the dancing scene is a bit too far in terms of silliness for circumstances that should be very serious, but it’s also too enjoyable for me to not get a kick out of. They also managed to make it quite dark and threatening, having him appear all over the place, forcing Kate and then Mel to dance, turning the two UNIT men into bouncing balls that still retain the images of their screaming faces and the Doctor telling Kate that they’re dead, and making all of the bullets turn into rose petals therefore showing them all that they’re helpless against him. For something that should come across as ridiculous, it’s actually surprisingly effective. Though I don’t know what it is with RTD and having his big bads dance to girl group songs lol.

- When Kate asks where the guards and staff have gone and the Toymaker just goes, “I think they’re still falling.” Eek.

- Ten really has a thing for offering bad guys to travel with him instead of wreaking havoc lol. But I love that they had him say that the two of them together could be ‘celestial’. Thank you for the little reference and for proving me right again that that’s the context in which we’re supposed to take his title. Also, interesting little moment there where the Toymaker very nearly almost seemed tempted.

- This scene is very quickly ruined, but I like Donna and Mel going to the Doctor’s side to be with him as he regenerates. Very sweet to see two past companions who still love him very much and are willing to put themselves in the line of fire just to make sure he’s not alone. And when the Toymaker comments, “Handmaidens,” it reminds me of the original serial when he comments on Steven’s “adolescent expressions of loyalty”.

- Nice detail that Mel seems a lot more prepared and okay with the realities of regeneration, just comforting him with a smile and not seeming terribly worried whether he’s going to be okay because she knows he will be, she’s seen him in the aftermath of a regeneration before and loved both Doctors she was with. Of course she and Donna are both emotional, but Mel definitely strikes me as more ready to deal with what comes next.

- I’m really mad that this moment is all about to get undermined, because having Ten 2.0’s last words be, “Allons-y,” aka, ‘let’s go’, is incredibly fitting and poignant in contrast to the original, “I don’t want to go.” Why’d they have to go and ruin what could have been a nice, touching regeneration?

- Aaaand here’s the moment that ruins the entire rest of the story for me. Rather than regenerating like normal, the Doctor “bigenerates”, splitting into two of himself so we have both Tennant and Gatwa together. It’s hand-waved with, ‘oh there’s this thing called bigeneration that’s supposed to be a myth but apparently not!’ and then not discussed any further. Russell, you just got back, did you seriously have to already bring a massively disruptive lore change with you? We just had one. I seem to be in the minority, at least on tumblr, but I am not on board with having two Doctors existing simultaneously. It feels more like the Doctor split off a twin. You can’t copy a soul and have two of that soul at the same time. That is not how people work. I keep having to focus on Mel being adorable in the background because the rest of this is aggravating.

- I feel it robs Ncuti of a proper entrance as well. He doesn’t get the same process that every Doctor before him since Troughton has gotten. He’s relegated to splitting off of the fan favorite rather than taking his place as is kinda his right, which could also easily cause people to forever view him as an offshoot and not the proper Doctor. Not to mention the fact that their split also divided articles of clothing between the two of them, meaning Fifteen is left running around in underwear for the entire remainder of the episode. A lot of people seem fine with this but I really think it’s an undignified entrance for the poor guy, and I’m not sure it’s going to age very well either. It would be humiliating enough for any Doctor to start out that way but I can already see people in the future looking back on it as a very degrading introduction for the first black Doctor. My mind also often goes to considering whether certain things would come across the same if it were a woman, and boy, that would not be received well if the new Doctor were a woman having to run around in her underwear as an intro, which means it isn’t really great for a man either.

- I wish I could enjoy the two Doctors excitedly interacting, but that’s the kind of thing that’s only fun or interesting in the usual context of multiple incarnations meeting up from different time periods. This stuff would otherwise be cute, but in the context it’s in, I’m just too uncomfortable to enjoy any of it.

- “Do you come in a range of colors?” is another line that I’m not sure is gonna age well. I’m not sure I like the sound of it now as it is.

- The Toymaker claims he played against the “guardians of time and space” and shrunk them into voodoo dolls. Are we talking Fifth Doctor era Guardians? Poor guys.

- Part of me feels the “ball game” final fight is cool looking (or at least, it’s well-shot to distract me from the fact that it’s not that good; I can’t decide), but the ultimate result is disappointing. It’s pretty unsatisfying to have the Toymaker’s defeat be that he happened to not catch a ball. It makes him look unskilled to just have it graze past his hand when he easily could have stretched slightly further and gotten it. I know people say that his original defeat in the old serial was anticlimactic, but he was defeated because the Doctor was clever. It wasn’t that the Toymaker did anything that would lead to his own loss, it’s not that he wasn’t as clever, it’s just that the Doctor had a good idea and succeeded with it. It was very evenly matched, but somebody has to win even in a very tight game and it was the Doctor. Here, the Toymaker loses because he was unlucky. It wasn’t a victory on the Doctor’s part, the Toymaker just messed up. That doesn’t feel like a satisfying defeat at all because it’s not even a defeat. Everything hinges on the Toymaker somehow not catching a ball.

- Don’t know if that’s the last we’ll see of the Toymaker. It may be the last of NPH playing him at least. I wouldn’t be shocked if they brought the character back for another round some decades down the line, just get him out of the box and dust him off on the rare occasion.

- He says his “legions” are coming, and I believe RTD has said that Fifteen is going to keep facing them. Curious who those will be. I don’t exactly see the Toymaker having armies in reserve somewhere.

- Good for the poor man that he gets to not be a marionette anymore!

- Fifteen: “You can’t save everyone.”

Ten: “Why not?”

Because you go Time Lord Victorious when you start asking that question. Have a Snickers.

- Again, I wish I could enjoy the two Doctors. Fifteen comforting Ten should be a very sweet thing, but this whole thing just feels so wrong to me.

- Well, cue endless speculation on whose hand picked up that gold tooth with the Master in it. That should keep the fandom going for a while.

- ^ Also, ahhh, the various Master laughs when it focuses in on that! I think I hear my beloved Delgado!

- I greatly appreciate all of the Classic references when they’re talking about all of the things they’ve gone through and never stopped to rest after, and all of the people lost.

- Fifteen: “Sarah Jane has gone, can you even believe that for a second?”

Ten: “I loved her.”

Fifteen: “I loved her.”

Owww, official confirmation in TV canon that Sarah Jane is gone by now. I’d appreciated that they had never explicitly said anything like they did with the Brigadier. I loved her, too. 😢

- ^ Also mentioning loving Rose, ahhh. The Doctor has never actually said those words to or about her because he was always an idiot thinking it didn’t need to be said. Finally, a Doctor says onscreen that he loved Rose! 2012 me is pleased.

- Mavic Chen! RTD said he’d be mentioned at some point, but still, there’s a deep cut of a reference! Heck yeah, Hartnell enthusiasts rise.

- “I’m fine because you fix yourself. We’re Time Lords, we’re doing rehab out of order.” Okay, this particular line would seem to imply that at some point when Ten 2.0 eventually regenerates, it will be to Fifteen? That he’s thrown back into the timeline and bigenerates out of himself as Fifteen, thus meaning there’s still just the one Doctor and the timeline aligns itself? Nothing else in this episode indicates that whatsoever, but if that’s what I’m meant to take out of it then it would fix a lot.

- So… they’re seriously saying that he became Ten again for the emotional catharsis of sitting back and living with Donna’s family for a while. Messing up regeneration lore to enable past lives to come back, ignoring that the point of regeneration since its inception is to move forwards, for what is essentially RTD’s fix-it AU fic for his own characters. This continues to feel like it’s RTD’s celebration of his own stuff rather than an overall 60th anniversary celebration. I really want to be happier about having my Ten back, and that Donna gets to remember everything, but so much of the way this has been done leaves a bit of a bad taste in my mouth.

- Aaand oh boy. Here’s the bit where they duplicate the TARDIS. For the sake of argument, say that Fifteen really did come after Ten 2.0 living his life with the Nobles and he’s just thrown backwards in the timeline. If that’s supposed to be the same with the TARDIS, that he’s just bringing it into this time somehow from where it last was with Ten 2.0 prior to his regeneration, then that would be fine. But there is absolutely nothing that indicates this. The takeaway I get is that the TARDIS has been copied. Tennant is going to stay at the Nobles’ and have the original TARDIS on hand so he can still leave sometimes. Gatwa takes off in the copied TARDIS. The Doctor that we’re supposed to be following from here on out is no longer traveling in the very same TARDIS as he always has. If that’s seriously the case, then that’s a GIGANTIC heck no from me. Absolutely not.

- Oh, how I wish I could more properly enjoy this final scene of Ten with the Nobles. On paper it’s absolutely adorable. If they confirm that Fifteen is the regeneration after and not an awkward offshoot, then retroactively I could enjoy this a lot more, but until that potentially happens, I’m still uncomfortable with the two separate Doctors at the same time and therefore uncomfortable with the context of him being here because there was a second Doctor who can keep going instead.

- Would have sworn that the Doctor’s eyebrow story was going to be about Delphon but then he says another name. Oh well.

- I do really like that Mel gets to join in on the Noble family gatherings. Lovely to keep her until the end and that she gets to have sort of a family. “Mad Aunty Mel” 💗

- ^ Also sweet that the Doctor took her to New York in the Gilded Age for a nice little trip at some point in the time skip before this. Mel deserves nice things.

- Why are we saying that Wilf is shooting the moles in the garden? Unless there’s something I’m forgetting where he’s done something like that before, I don’t feel like Wilf would hurt a fly let alone moles. With how hard it was for him to take out his gun after so many years in The End of Time I’m not sure I buy him being okay with shooting anything. Weird note to end on for him.

- Having the Doctor spend most of his time living with the Nobles and resting presents a bit of a Steve-stays-in-the-past-in-Endgame problem in that there’s no way he wouldn’t always be trying to right wrongs around him. Just like Steve would have to ignore every horrible thing he could do something about, including rescuing Bucky who is being tortured out there, any time this Doctor isn’t there when something is going terribly wrong nearby, it means he’s ignoring it while he lounges. That doesn’t sound like him at all.

- And off Fifteen goes, getting ready to go into the Christmas special. I’m worried about it but hopefully it’s better than I think it will be…?

~~~~~

OVERVIEW

Oh, massive mixed bag.

I really like the Toymaker parts of the episode. He wasn’t in nearly as much of it as he should have been and his downfall is disappointing, but the overall writing for him and performance by NPH was fantastic. There’s some very good dark and twisted stuff in here and I’m glad they went for it, even if I would have done even more with it. He is far and away the main highlight of the episode and much of my enjoyment of it is down to him. Mel also plays a considerable role in that, just because I’m thrilled any time an old companion turns up, but I also felt more connected to her, whose stories I haven’t even seen yet, than Ten or Donna somehow. Honorable mention to Kate and Shirley who were also great.

As has been true of all of these, I still just can’t fully emotionally connect with Ten and Donna. I desperately wanted to, and there’s a part of me that did in a way, but nowhere near how it should have been. I feel like I’m insane because on paper there’s nothing even wrong with them and it sure as heck ain’t the performances. But going from a few of their episodes in series 4 in the lead-up and feeling all sorts of strong emotions, that somehow just didn’t carry over to this and I don’t get why. Pacing? Trapped in the poor writing around them? I seriously can’t figure this out, but it doesn’t feel the same as it used to at all. Something is wrong and I don’t know what the heck it is.

And there’s the matter of Ten coming back because apparently that specific incarnation needed a happy ending. I really feel the need to emphasize that I LOVE TEN, but being nostalgic and sentimental isn’t a good enough reason to mess with the regeneration cycle and skip backwards a few lives. Literally the reason they give is that this particular face needed rest (they do say that the Doctor needs rest generally, but they didn’t have to go back to this face to do that — Donna indicates that this face came back so that he could ‘come home’ and be happy.) It feels way too much like favoritism to single this incarnation out in such a big way, and honestly? Ten needed to go when he did. He was becoming someone he wasn’t and it was his time. Of all of the Doctors, his was the one that actually really needed to regenerate, for the sake of his own soul. It was certainly distressing but it was a solid end for him. I don’t feel he needs this do-over to go back and get a happy ending. No one Doctor deserves that over another (though if they did, it would be poor Two whose life was cut short by execution courtesy of his own kind.) I love Ten so dearly but it feels wrong to act like he’s so important that he specifically has earned any of this treatment. I’m beginning to appreciate Tom Baker’s approach of not making multiple comebacks precisely because of his popularity.

For a good chunk of this ep, the writing was pretty good, especially where the Toymaker himself was concerned. But once the bigeneration happened, it was so downhill that it makes me struggle to want to rewatch this even for the good parts. I’m really, really hoping that I’m right and Fifteen is meant to come after Ten 2.0 has already had his lifetime, ditto his TARDIS, because it would largely save this episode for me and because the alternative is completely appalling and I can’t be okay with it. To make matters worse, Russell has claimed that he believes the bigeneration echoed back into all previous regenerations and causing each Doctor to split off from the last so they all get to go on with their own life, that they’re ALL out there in some kind of “Doctorverse”, which is absolutely insane. It defeats the purpose of regeneration: “Times change and so must I,” and, “Life defends on change and renewal.” This completely flies in the face of a critical aspect of the show, that one has to move on eventually. There’s a time for each of these incarnations, but they can’t last forever. It weakens all of these deaths, a good number of which were sacrifices, to claim that they all actually get to live on, and the very idea of it also supports my fear that there’s seriously just supposed to be two Doctors now and we’re supposed to be okay with that. According to Russell there’s a whole ton of Doctors existing simultaneously and that’s supposed to be okay. It’s the definition of bonkers is what it is. I really feel the opposite of all of the ‘RTD saved the show!’ sentiments; it feels like he’s gotten too big for his britches and has returned with a bizarre god complex where he’s wielding way too much power and plans to use all of it however he wishes. He’s single-handedly making me nervous for this entire next era.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BIG PICTURE

Though there are definitely things I liked, particularly the Toymaker and Wild Blue Yonder, there was far too much that I don’t feel good about for me to be able to say I really loved these specials. I probably won’t reblog much of it beyond what I already have and I’m not particularly motivated to rewatch these except in a full-scale series rewatch because I’m not the sort of person who can let myself skip stuff.

I really feel like these should have been either Jodie’s or Ncuti’s. Ten didn’t need to be here, much as I love him. It could have either been a very dramatic ending for Thirteen (though I enjoyed The Power of the Doctor for that) or a very interesting beginning for Fifteen. It would be interesting to see a brand new Doctor have to navigate such intense stuff. And if it had been Thirteen, I honestly feel I may have emotionally connected better because she’s who we’ve been with.

In my perfect world, these would have all had to do with the Toymaker. Have him be woven throughout the first episode (and give that first ep a very different plot than what we got) and then a cliffhanger that reveals him as having been behind it all, leading into two full episodes of fighting against his power. Either keep Wild Blue Yonder, because it’s pretty darn good, and just have it so that my initial thoughts regarding involvement from the Toymaker were correct, or alter it entirely and focus on really delving into who he is and how much danger they’re in. Make them play deadly games. Get some incredibly dark and disturbing visuals and emotional torture in there; show past companions as puppets and dolls (whether it’s really them or not), have them come to life and taunt the Doctor if they’re fake or hauntingly beg him to save them if they’re real, make him face choosing between saving Donna vs other friends, really dig in as deeply and darkly as is possible without permanent consequences like death. Make episode 3 a long battle of wits with lots of intimate time between the Doctor and the Toymaker, with extremely severe personal stakes. Go all out. If you’re going to use the Toymaker again you really should be taking advantage of just how far you can go with a character like this, and the dynamic between him and the Doctor. Give NPH a boatload of screen time and a big, twisted sandbox to play in. Loads of emotionally, mentally, conceptually, and visually dark and disturbing things. They had some very good stuff but there should have been more of it, and even more unsettling, or at least on par with the marionette man and the soldiers turned to balls. If we keep Tennant for this, make the regaining of his face a plot point that was influenced by the Toymaker, something to torture him because Ten was one of the most emotionally volatile and damaged. When regenerating into Fifteen, let it be a normal regeneration, preferably caused by the Doctor needing to sacrifice himself to defeat the Toymaker because he can’t get away like he did before — this time, he really does have to face going down with the Toymaker to succeed. Keep Donna because she’s a prime resource for hitting Ten where it hurts, but have their reunion be orchestrated and the regaining of her memories be more complicated. It shouldn’t be as easy as it was. Have ample time to give full acknowledgment to the stakes involved. If she regains them in the first episode and it feels too easy, make it so that the Toymaker has only made it seem that way, but she’s in serious trouble the longer she goes on with her memory intact. Either tragically make her forget again in the end to save her life and to not completely undo Journey’s End, or make it far more complicated to ensure that she can safely retain the memories. It should only be in the final episode when they’ve fought for it and come out victorious that they can confirm that she’s safe and is able to go on this way. Definitely keep Mel somewhere in here, as well as having other old friends appear in some way or another. In the VERY least, just reference Steven and Dodo, because they didn’t, dang it all, and I ask for so little.

There’s so much that I wish these specials had done, that I wish they’d been. And largely, they just didn’t. For all the good that there was, there was a heck of a lot that ultimately makes it fail as a collective whole, at least for me. I had to put on a Classic story as a palate cleanser after going through all of that again.

#doctor who #dw critical #negativity #60th anniversary #the star beast #wild blue yonder #the giggle #spoilers #dw spoilers

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save-the-villainous-cat · 2 years

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A flirtatious villain with a stoic and increasingly flustered hero in a hotel room together, there is only one bed

“Fuck,” the hero whispered. “Holy fuck.”

They stared at the bed with all the hatred their pure little heart could come up with. However, it was a bit useless. Unfortunately, the bed didn’t disappear. It didn’t even come close to it.

“Damn. Someone has some hidden anger issues,” the villain said in their favourite taunting voice. It had been bad enough that the hero was stuck with them. It had something to do with negotiation or whatever. The hero was very bad with listening. All they knew was that the agency wanted them to meet someone very important tomorrow. And the villain had to accompany them.

Sometimes the hero wished they’d listen some more when their superiors were talking.

“I don’t have anger issues,” the hero said. The villain was so stupidly annoying they were certain that it would actually cause anger issues in the very near future.

“Don’t worry.” The villain punched the hero’s shoulder playfully. “Your secret is safe with me. I like it a bit rough, actually.”

The hero sighed as they already felt the hauntingly familiar heat in their cheeks. It was happening way too often.

“I hate you,” they whispered.

“That’s so hot.”

Ignoring them, the hero threw their backpack next to the bed. They were definitely prepared for this. The training at the agency didn’t have a course about flirtation.

“I’ll take the floor,” they announced. Apparently this was funny to the villain. They laughed as if the hero was the funniest person in the entire universe.

“Look, you don’t have to be intimidated by me. My skills are…advanced but I’ll go easy on you,” they said eventually and the hero wanted to bury themselves right there.

The flirting had gotten worse over the last few weeks. Yes, the hero enjoyed it. Being liked enough by your enemy to be punished with their flirting was…flattering. But the hero hated how they reacted. Their face blushed. Their hands started shaking. Their thoughts tumbled through their skull.

“Could you stop that for just five seconds?” the hero hissed at their enemy. “We’re not here to flirt or to kiss or to sleep together.”

“Darling—” the villain said. Their facial expression had changed rapidly, as if they’d just realised something but the hero couldn’t really interpret it. Nor did they were interested in that. It was odd but the hero needed to get this out of their system.

“I am really not in the mood for your games. The last time you flirted with me, you trapped me and pushed me against a wall. Like, you drive me crazy…” the hero continued.

“Darling,” the villain tried again. To no avail.

“It’s just humiliating. I can’t flirt. I’m not good at it. I get embarrassed and can’t do it, it’s just—”

“Darling.” The hero stopped talking instantly, their head whipping around to their nemesis.

“What?!” They realised too late that they’d reacted to the pet name. But the villain didn’t seem to care. They looked tense, they looked concentrated.

“The room is bugged. Someone knows we’re here.”

Oh fuck.

#yes yes villain very Smart #writing snippet #heroxvillain prompt #heroxvillain snippet #heroes and villains #hero #villain #hero x villain #heroxvillain #request #an answer for an ask

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yesterdayiwrote · 10 months

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I really want the thesis on George mirroring people if you’re so inclined 👀

So I also got this anon and the two things are kind of tied together...

i would absolutely read your essay about how george doesn't know how to be himself because i also have so many thoughts about his personality that i'm too scared to voice for a fear of people saying that i'm making assumptions😶😶😶

I will try my best, but I am absolutely dreadful at putting my rambly observations/overanalysis/bug under a microscope theories into coherent prose sometime so apologies in advance this tails off or gets a bit muddled!

I think it's quite obvious that George it's a bit... socially awkward? He's confident in an oratory way, he seems quite chatty and social, he's not shy about his body and showing it off, and yet there's just an undeniable 'awkwardness' to him that it’s hard to put into words?

It’s always said by people that George is too ‘PR’ and I think he really does try hard? Possibly too hard sometimes because it seems so noticeable that he’s trying, but I don’t think it’s because of any nefarious reason, I feel like he’s just really kind of… self conscious?

I think there’s a tendency for people to view self consciousness through a lens of vanity and pre-occupation with perfection but actually a lot of the time it’s a confidence issue too and I’ve just always got a feeling that despite appearances, George isn’t always the most confident in himself and doesn’t know how (or perhaps want to) let down his walls completely and just be his full unguarded self in public.

I think we see flashes of it at times, and I think all of them are wary of being fully open in public, and yet George always feels the one to me who is perhaps most worried about being ‘silly’?

Which is where the mirroring thing comes in. Sometimes I feel that in his quest to present a ‘version’ of himself, he almost strays into emulating other people at times? (This is where it gets all deep and if you’re not into the bug under a microscope stuff you may want to jump off here)

I feel sometimes (and I may be way off here) that George still isn’t quite sure who he is yet or how he wants to be seen. No criticism because I think that’s totally normal. He’s still young, there’s more pressure to be a character of some kind of substance in the public eye, and I think plenty of people much older than him still don’t entirely know who they are, who they want to be or how they want the world to perceive them.

So, I think sometimes he kind of emulates people around him, which again isn’t unusual, I think we all do it. I think it’s part of how most of us find ourselves, and I’m totally willing to admit it may be me drawing parallels where they weren’t necessarily intended. It may be that he does these things completely subconsciously but idk I still just find it all fascinating?

He went through a brief streamer phase just after lockdown which felt like it was kind of leaning in to what Lando was doing. It gets picked up that Daniel bops along to the National Anthems and now George bops along to them too. Lewis posts a thirst trap… George posts a thirst trap. He hangs out with Jack Grealish once and within two months he’s got his hair style (sans chunky highlights which is an OVERSIGHT tbh)…. - okay that one may be a reach but I’m struggling to think of more examples off the off the top of my head 😂.

As I say, I don’t say it as anything bad and actually I think it is subconsciously part of human nature but it just makes me giggle because it feels like he has such… hero worship of people around him and idk… it’s cute?!

#george russell #bug under a microscope #idek if this makes sense #apologies for the in-depth psychoanalysis #if you don’t like that stuff then avoid…

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destinylordoffreaks · 1 year

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has promised my yearly strong heart bears piece it's been 7 years of draw her the idea began because I remember seeing a breast cancer awareness bear when I was a kid and thought the idea was intriguing Care Bears that taught awareness and understanding of health issues As someone who grew up with physical and mental disabilities, it’s been cool to be able to see representation, but I’ve never really seen anything for my specific issue, so I decided to make one.

Strong heart bear and grumpy bear enjoying a beautiful day in the forest of feelings with their family after the rain

I did it I finally did it. It took me over two weeks from start to finish. It’s finally done. I had to push myself so hard to finish the coloring job on this like I hit a wall where I just did not want to finish but I promised you guys art and so here it is.

So the concept was kind of like a follow up to my earlier strong heart bear and grumpy bear piece where strong heart is sort of comforting him because he’s upset and the idea is sort of the sunshine after the rain how sometimes you just need someone to be there and it helps I had at one point considered making this as a two-part piece and having a second piece that would’ve been just strong heart and grumpy bear but I’m not sure if I’m gonna finish it if I do I’ll post it but at the moment it’s just a Sketch’s

You also may have noticed I kind of a redesigned, noble, hard horse a little. It always bugged me that in the cartoon he didn’t really look like a horse where has in his original sketches. He looks a lot more horselike as well as the comics, so I just sort of decided to change that a little and I feel like I like the way it turned out. I also tried to make the colors on all of the care Bears has close to their original stuffed animals has possible except true heart and noble heart colors are sort of a mix between their concept art and their movie art although I ended up using their concept art belly badges I use their TV art colors has the umbrella that they’re holding so fun fact for you.

And the trees in the background were off pain I redrew them like three or four times trying to get this look just right, so I hope you guys enjoy it and I don’t know if I ever said it, but I would love to hear comments and opinions, especially on any of my random thought posts Even if it’s constructive criticism like if I missed something or forgot some thing remembered feel free to chat I can’t guarantee that I will respond quickly, but I will try to respond .

#chd awareness month #chdawarenes #strong heart bear #care bears #care bears art #oc #original art #destinylordoffreaks #grumpy bear #cheer bear #swift heart rabbit #tenderheart bear #funshine bear #friend bear #hugs and tugs #lotsa heart elephant #noble heart horse #true heart bear #2023

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itcamefromthetoybox · 2 years

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Clearly the Bad Guy

Tomorrow’s my birthday, which, as you can imagine, I’m super excited for. Already, I’m getting birthday presents in the mail, and so, I decided to talk about one of them today. It’s fitting that the last review of 2022 is this dude, considering how we started 2022, and also considering what a dumpster fire the year turned out to be. Let’s end the year how we started it: looking at a creepy skull face. Now, let’s delve into “Masters of the Universe Origins 200X Skeletor” and see if he deserves a spot on your shelves.

My first exposure to “Masters of the Universe” was as a kid in 2002 when Cartoon Network aired the rebooted series. I absolutely adored Skeletor. He was sinister, proudly evil, comedic, and also a legitimate threat. His own minions lived in fear of him and he rode around on a panther. Unlike the Filmation Skeletor, who I am also very fond of, he was funny without being a joke, and viewers knew this was someone to dread. In this series, we did see an origin for Skeletor. 16 years ago, Skeletor, then called Keldor, tried to conquer the world and found himself opposed by the man who would be He-Man’s father, Randor, leading the other heroes. In the final battle, he tried throwing a vial of acid at Randor, who deflected it into Keldor’s face. Yeah, that was a bit intense. Keldor fled and made a deal with the demonic sorcerer Hordak to be transformed into Skeletor, since acid to the face tends to be a bit deadly, and Keldor wanted to live longer than the next hour. He and his minions were sealed behind a mystic wall for 16 years, though they eventually escaped to do battle with He-Man and his band of do-gooders.

This Skeletor will be old enough to drink next year!

This figure’s really interesting to me, because it’s an Origins figure, meaning that it’s an updated design from the original line of figures in the 80’s, but it’s meant to emulate a figure from 2002, released in honor of the 40th anniversary of the “He-Man and the Masters of the Universe” franchise. Skeletor does come out looking good, but if you know the 2002 figure, you can really see where the designers had to make compromises with the design to make it work with the Origins toys. On the upside, if you don’t know the 2002 figure, then you won’t notice this at all, since he’s just a straightforward Skeletor with no gimmicks. He looks exactly like how Skeletor should look, he has a very basic design, and he honestly works as a good first Skeletor figure for people looking to get into the Origins line.

Like all Origins figures, Skeletor has fantastic articulation. He’s very posable and fun to play with, and his chest piece and skirt, which are removable with some difficulty, don’t get in the way of his movements. Just know that they’re made of a softer plastic and can be bent out of shape if you’re not careful.

Once sold out his entire team to see if he could hire actually competent staff.

Skeletor comes with two accessories: his magic Havoc Staff and his sword from the 2002 cartoon. The Havoc Staff is unchanged from every other Origins Skeletor, so not really much to say there. It’s a purple staff with a ram’s head, and it fits in Skeletor’s hand. His sword, meanwhile, both looks cool and is my one problem with the figure. The 2002 Skeletor’s sword could split in half into two swords, and in their combined form, they actually had two handles. Each side of the sword even looked different, to show kids that they were two swords stuck together. This Skeletor’s sword has the two handles, the different designs on each side of the sword, and even sculpted line down the middle of the blade like the combined sword from 2002 had. The issue is, though, this sword doesn’t split in two like the 2002 one. It looks cool and fits in Skeletor’s hand, but the fact it has all the signs of being two swords but isn’t bugs me. I can live with it, but it’s still something to note if you’re getting this toy.

Dark plastic really does not photograph well. I mean, at all. Pretend you can see the detailing.

Other than my issue with the sword not being able to split, there is one other problem I have with this toy: there’s nowhere to store the sword. Most Origins figures don’t have a place to store accessories, so that shouldn’t be an issue, but my most recent Origins Skeletor is Battle Armor Skeletor, who has a place to store his sword, so I can’t help but be a little annoyed, especially since the 2002 figure did have a storage spot on his back.

Now for the moment of truth: would I recommend this figure? Absolutely. He’s a really solid Skeletor other than a few details that I admit are me nitpicking and comparing this figure to one from twenty years ago. He’s also only about $12-$18, depending on where you get him. I know that’s a wide range of prices. Toy prices have been kinda weird lately, and most stores with a toy aisle have He-Man stuff. But I would definitively recommend this toy for fans both young and old, and I for one really enjoy him. Also, it just hit me that I watched the show this guy’s from over 20 years ago. It’s seriously been over 20 years. I’m 31 tomorrow. Oh God, I’m old. Anyways, this is JS, signing off and wishing you Happy Toy Hunting!

#motu #masters of the universe #motu origins #masters of the universe origins #skeletor #toy #toys #toy review #review #reviews

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rattoes420 · 2 years

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For otp! You know it, I know it, you're gonna do it eventually, JERIC

All of em⁉️ alright bet I’m deranged like that

1. Who most initiates PDA?

Eric obvi

2. Any sleep habits either had to get used to?

Eric prob sleeps weird, I’m not elaborating on that, and I think jacks the type of mf who needs to be at a certain level of comfort at night or else he’ll die, he’s willing to let some things pass but not much

3. Jealousy issues?

Yea y’all saw witches of pennbrooke

4. What’s a Night Out for them?

They’ve got range, shits anywhere from nice restaurant to club to breaking into mr Feeny’s car

5. What’s an evening in for them?

Watching films, eating shitty food and being gay and stupid

6. Double Date? Thoughts? Who?

Jeric double date with Rachel and whatever bitch they try and set her up with real (also I’m pushing lesbian Rachel)

7. Do they want (have) kids?

Yea :)))

8. Have an AU thought?

I’ve got a boy meets world remake in my mind and heart (and google docs) if that counts, but so far I haven’t come up with any of my lil batshit completely disconnected shit yet

9. If they got engaged… who proposed?

Jack,,,,

10. How do they deal with the other’s family?

I feel like jack would kinda wanna impress Alan and Amy but overall he gets along with them and like,,, Shawn likes Eric and that’s all that rly matters

11. What is their love language?

Both prob mostly quality time but Eric also probably physical touch

12. How are their communication skills?

Average? I feel like Eric is kinda defined BY his emotional intelligence so that helps but they’ve got their issues (specifically cause of the time gap thing)

13. A little personal… but… Hot and Steamy or Soft and Tender?

Haven’t thought too much about this and if I’m being real idk if I wanna

14. How did they first meet?

K that one is just canon, shoutout to Cory for introducing them, he is a real supporter of the lgbtq+ community

15. Why do they like each other?

They both kinda bring something to each other that they themselves don’t have so they kinda balance each other out and bring out the best in each other because of that, I think that’s kinda why they like each other???? Cause of the differences and new perspectives and shit idk

17. Morning rituals?

Thinking about adult jeric, y’all they have real jobs now and Eric probably has to get up early as fuck, I doubt he’s at all functional when he first gets up, my guy is like “five more minutes” when he’s literally a senator, jack probably read some article once about the healthiest morning routine and has tried to abide by that ever since

18. Evening rituals?

Mfs watch tv and films till one of them falls asleep and I really believe that

19. How are they at parties or gatherings?

Jacks mostly cool and normal, Eric makes things fucking crazy/pos

20. Most cuddly?

ericericeric

21. Movie Night?

Of course they do that shit, oh to be a fly on the wall well they decide to watch a horror film 😔😔😔

22. Who is the photo bug?

Prob Eric but I could see it being jack

23. How well do they know each other’s favorite foods?

Pretty well probably they literally live together (side note but Eric’s either the type of mf to eat like three different type of foods with very little variety or the type of mf to have a new food he’s obsessed with every other week no I’m not elaborating)

24. What do their texts look like?

Adult jeric time :)))) jack has that stereotypical old man texting style, Eric does that weird thing my grandma does where it’s like “congrats on the show today🏄‍♀️🌈🍰”

25. Parenting style?

Dude Eric would literally be such a good dad, fun parent, Eric Matthews be my dad challenge, I think Jack might be worried about fucking up but overall I think he’s do a good job, he’d make sure that kid didn’t die

26. If they have kids, who named them? What would they name them?

I’m not entirely sure?

27. Who brings home an illegal pet?

Eric if either of them (Eric’s not rly a pet guy and jack has a hard enough time taking care of himself)

28. Who takes the longest getting ready to leave?

I’m not sure, this could go either way

29. Who said I Love You, first?

I like the idea of it being jack but it was prob Eric

30. When did they realize they loved each other?

Eric was prob during witches of pennbrooke cause,,,, I love that episode and I like the implications of it,,,, jack I legit think was probably after the end of the series but before girl meets world (I mostly like to think this cause it makes me sad 👍)

#don’t complain if any of this is ooc #I am TIRED #+ I’m not ceo of boy meets world #haha unless/j #boy meets world #jack hunter #eric matthews #jeric

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blankdblank · 2 years

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The White Dove Pt 38 - Stepping Down

Masterlist

So like I said here’s the next chapter and hope you guys enjoy the drama as it keeps on rolling in. Can’t wait for the next few chapters to be posted so you guys can enjoy them too, tons of fun ahead. :) I know how long the last chapter was and I hope you guys do let me know how you are liking the series so far and what you think might be coming up. Always fun to get some guesses of what might be coming.

***...***

“I’m a cheater,” Gwen’s voice turned your head, having just dropped your things at your place to head to the garage to meet your delivery of sail supplies. And her being here had Eddie, who was bringing the things Eldfalls had carried for you back home tied to the mast down to be carried to your place to put away the pictures and letters you had been given throughout your trip, look between you two curious if he should leave. “No, I want you to hear this too. We were together two months and my parents jumped on you at that dinner and you were both so nice about it, but I stupidly went and cheated on you right before Christmas.”

“Gwen you don’t have to do this,” you said to the tearful, blotchy cheeked blonde looking down at you adamant in not running away from this.

“Yes I do, you were upset about the trip and you were gone just two days, and I clearly can’t be trusted!” she said shaking her head mid wave of her arms, “I can’t make it one party alone how am I ever going to make somebody love me to marry me?! I cheated on you!”

“Gwen, you’re fourteen, marriage is way out of the question right now.”

“That is beyond the point and you know it, I-,”

A step closer you moved resting your hands on her arms causing her voice to crack and her to go silent in her stare down at you. “I am not mad at you. Clearly Harry tapped on a spot in the relationship I wasn’t meeting. We’re better as friends no harm in saying that.”

Softly she sniffled and said in a poor struggle to keep her voice calm, “Why are you being so nice?”

“Because if I’m going to be bothered by anyone in this it’s going to be Harry. In this equation he’s the home wrecking whore.” You said making her laugh and sniffle in a glance away. “Boy clearly has boundary issues, he sent me a message saying you wanted to be in a relationship,” and she shrugged. “Well I am not going to stand in the way, but the very first sign he’s possessive or aggressive or insults you or makes you feel small in any way you come and tell me and I’ll rip his arms off and leave what’s left of him to your dad.” Making her laugh tearfully again and nod in a wipe of her cheek to get rid of a stray tear.

“I will,” she said and her eyes swept over your face again, “I’m sorry.”

“You are going to be if your parents find out you’re skipping school.”

“It’s just Calculus, we have a sub today.” She said sniffling again.

“Go back to class and don’t worry about it, Dean Morita said I could come in on Thursday, get some spare sleep with an extra day off.”

“Okay,” she said reluctantly gathering her things from the far wall by the door to head off to Midtown leaving you to turn and press your head into Eddie’s chest and grumble.

“The main goal is you know Harry’s gonna fail, right?” he asked you in the fold of his arms around your back.

“End goal I get to tear the little bug’s arms off.” You said making him grin.

“That’s the spirit.” He said in your pull back at the sound of breaks sounding for the delivery truck.

“Now I just got to make sure I don’t end up with another accidental relationship.” Making him chuckle in setting the things down on one of the chairs to help guide what would be four foot tall twin spools of wool and two foot tall smaller spools of the colored material to stack up inside a new barrier to keep it all from being stolen. Mainly cleaning up and buying fresh food was how you spent the rest of day with Eddie, ignoring the messages as good as you could until you received one from Harry that he heard from Gwen you were back and he wanted to see you tonight at the gym to hear about your trip.

In sweats and a t shirt you walked rather reluctantly into the gym, and against your better judgment. When you saw Harry in his latest new set of gym clothes by the spot where he left his gym bag, you said, “I’m not gone even three days and you swoop in on my girlfriend?” Steve and the usual other broad shouldered weightlifter used to your banter stole wide eyed glances your way at your shocking admission.

“Gwen said you weren’t mad.”

“Oh I’m not mad cuz I know if you hurt her I get to break your arms and drop what’s left of you off to her dad, you know he’s a Police Captain right?”

“Yes,” he answered defensively.

“So hands to yourself there playboy she’s a good girl prove you deserve her attention and trust.” You answered flatly.

“You sure you’re not mad?” he asked with a brow raised uncertain of how to take your tone and blank expression that had Steve concerned on his path to the squat station to keep nearby.

“Not mad, pull-ups first,” you said pointing at the bar to your right.

“You’re gonna break me tonight aren’t you on this workout?” he asked trying to joke his way out of his discomfort at your lack of reaction to what he had done. Unaware the polite flat tone and demeanor you had was a kindness to keep from murdering his selfish self.

“Whether you break or not will prove if you kept up on your workouts or slacked off while I was away.”

“It was Christmas!”

“Football games are on Christmas,” You pointed again at the bar, “Twenty.”

Somehow in the workout routine that was no less rigorous than the usual, but with little reaction to his tries to make you smile or laugh eventually a joke about your new title had him starting with a comment that was both an insult to you and Gwen. He truly was doing you a favor by taking an unsuitable and gay relationship off your hands so you could pick some man to give you tons of babies to keep that title in the family.

Tightly your hand clenched and before you could show so much of a twitch in the path to the back room the owner of the gym had grabbed him by the back of the neck of his shirt and drug him out of the building, “I won’t be having no bigots in my building! Young Lass deserves twelve times what you pay to put up with a cruel little boy like you! Find another gym and trainer to boot!” was the final thing said before Harry was left to scoff at his bag hitting him in the chest to the slam of the door. Short and stocky the son of the owner who knew Steve back in the 40’s came back to where you were still standing and said, “You need money for training I got thirty meatheads who would be more appreciative of your efforts than that idiot if you’re hard up for cash.”

“He didn’t even pay me, he kept trying to pretend he was my friend, but I think that was only because his dad wanted to hire me after I graduated.”

“He’s no friend, and if his dad’s anything like him, steer clear. Spent my 20’s fighting through guys like that who wanted at my sisters and cousins. Not worth their weight in burlap. You can do better.”

“Thank you,” you said. From his bag having seen the drop of blood that smoothed down the side of your hand Steve pulled out a first aid kit in his bag he found a gauze pad from and came over. Subtly pressing it over your curled fingers, luring your eyes down to your hand then up to him as he nodded his head to the side, “Hey Steve,” you said flatly following him to your bag in the back room where he could subtly help to put a bandage over the dips your nails had left in the skin. Trying not to focus on the scarred smudges of skin, replacing the fingerprints across your fingers and palm, or the pain involved in gaining said oddities. “How’s the registry thing going?”

“We’ve been on strike past few weeks, Rhodes signed the papers, so did Nat. Tony is still having his lawyers dissect the terms for the registry.”

“Well for Lt Rhodes at least his pension is tied up in it,” that had Steve catch your eyes.

“What?”

“Military mandated, he’s active duty, he refuses that’s a Court Martial and he’s stripped of his suit and all his benefits in a dishonorable discharge.” That had his lips part and you said, “If you hadn’t been listed as dead back in the 40’s they’d probably still have you down in a uniform on the base too there, Private, signing those papers.”

“Wildly, his benefits didn’t cross my mind. I’ll give him a call after I get you home. He’s got a little girl, I should have considered that.”

“You know they have free art courses at the community college twice a week if you can’t afford the tuition on what they’ve paid you so far.” After a blink and you’d lowered your hand he let go of when the bandage was secured. “Found some of your sketches you sold the Times and the Bugle back in the ‘30’s. With some history and pop culture tutoring you could get a decent job as an artist somewhere.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“I haven’t slept well, past few weeks. Keep seeing the fire that burned down our home night my parents and I were taken. Apparently going back home didn’t help. I lost eight years of my life, but unlike you I wasn’t frozen for it, I had to watch it go by. I don’t know what I want to do or be, so I try a lot of things. You like art, heard you played something brass in school,” that had him roll his eyes.

“I had asthma, wasn’t able to play much of anything.”

“They have lessons for that, you could play jazz.”

“Why would I play jazz?” He asked defensively.

“Because you only listen to jazz,” you said lifting a finger to tap the ear bud resting on his chest.

“Oh,” he said and lifted his bag when you took a step away. “Seemed like you had fun on your trip.”

“I did,” you said and caught his eye as he again draped his coat around your shoulders for the walk onto the street. “I was tired, but it was fun.”

“He really steal your girlfriend?”

“Ya, but if anything it’s more on him than her. He’s a conniving little pest, and she’s a really sweet girl.”

He nodded and stole another glance your way, “Were you, together long?” he asked awkwardly.

“I thought we were just friends,” making him look at you still with a blank expression. “Somehow my helping her after rehearsal turned to her offer for coffee, which somehow either was our first date or the day I said she could come to my self pampering hair and nail day to go to some second hand shops after. Then in November me and Eddie get invited over and her dad flat out lays it on the table that because of my culture where we don’t date we were a couple. You don’t just, poof, a couple, there’s commentary, there’s some verbalization. But she was 14,”

“Oh,” he said with a nod and you looked up at him. “Bucky got stuck in that, Valerie, sweet girl, just fell for him, he helped to set her up with his younger cousin. Acted a bit upset for her sake but respectfully stepped aside.”

“I’m not mad at her,” you said and he shook his head.

“Oh you can’t be mad at her against that guy.”

“Soon as he heard we were an item he was all up in arms to have more ‘us time’.”

“So he’s jealous. That’s bound to be exhausting. You said his dad could have put him up to this?”

“Norman Osborn, I mean he left me a pretty flat snippy email. He’s been after genetic research for years now, especially my parents’ work, but the emancipation case was to reinstate their research and I couldn’t just go and sell it to him when it’s bound to my parents’ research center. He can huff all he likes, not that the military would pay him well for a way to cure degenerative diseases anyways.”

“He works with the military?”

“Him and Hammer picked up a big chunk of the war tech field when Stark stepped back. See you bought a looser fit shirt.”

Awkwardly he smirked in a glance away and answered, “Tore my shirt last week, had to, biceps are too big now to get the same fit across the chest.”

“Unless you’re challenging the Hulk on body mass might want to give art a try when you can’t sleep. Graphic novels can be a good way to journal what your nightmares are. My therapist has me journal mine, sometimes words can’t capture it or you can’t find the words to write it down.”

“Graphic novels, why would I write a graphic anything?”

“No, graphic, it’s a term, like a picture is a graphic when used in print, and t shirts with logos on them are graphic tees.”

“Oh,”

“So it’s a thick sort of comic and depending on the style can have other names too. Part of why you could look more into art classes to catch up.”

“You’re really serious about this?”

“You just want to keep killing people for one reason or another until you’re 325?” You asked, dropping his jaw, “Because they’ll let you, no matter how badly it breaks you. You are part of the war machine, never ending since the birth of the h-bomb.”

“Think I’m starting to catch onto that,” he said matter of factly.

“Did you meet any of the Vanderbilts?”

“I think you have the wrong impression of my circle from the 40’s.”

“I just mean their family wasted so much money and ruined so many architectural landmarks from this city.” And the way back through the subway to your stop he listened to what you had read on how the city had changed making him feel a bit nostalgic for the buildings that were long gone. Enough that when he did get back to the tower a bunch of printer paper taken and a set of pencils later and he had the start to his favorite haunts back in the day by the time he felt surprisingly calm as he drifted off to a more peaceful night’s sleep than he anticipated.

Paperwork in your mail had you curious and calling Rhodey over your breakfast, “Morning Pluto,” you heard him sigh, clearly just been woken up.

“I’m sorry, I thought I’d get your machine.”

“No, all good, I am at my desk, nodded off. Thank you for waking me. What’s up?”

“I got a contract from Tony Stark to design aircraft for his airline? You know him, wouldn’t I get a call or something first to interview me to see if our ideas mesh?”

That had him chuckle to himself, “Tony, can be like that. I won’t lie to you, it’s a ploy to help him crack the Goliath code.”

“He still doesn’t get it yet?” You asked with more amusement than confusion in your tone, making him chuckle again.

“No. Which is why he’s desperate and now Stark Industries can make private jets and larger planes for sports teams and all that. You don’t have to if you aren’t up for it.”

“I mean, it’s money and I finally get to see my BigBucks fly,” you said making him smirk at the name you’d shared with him before.

“He will love the name by the way.”

“I suppose it couldn’t hurt if he wants to creep into private jets while they’ve been knocked down. Stark Industries has been at a loss since he stepped out of war manufacturing. And he will have his clue, not that it will do him much good. How would we handle the hand off then?”

…

You didn’t need to even step foot in your first classroom to know that the school had taken sides and regrettably you were now a title having unworthy suitor who had been left for another. So blankly you made your way on your lunch break to find your Color Guard Coach as you’d heard there was a major rift growing in the team as to whose side to take. For how fun it actually was to be on the team you didn’t want to be the reason why Gwen couldn’t be on the team.

Gently you knocked on the open door to the teacher’s lounge that had their eyes shift to you in the doorway in front of a few other coaches who watched you step inside at their, “Something wrong Pluto?”

“I wanted to apologize for missing the last game and the past few rehearsals,”

“We all understood, if you were able to have done it here I’m certain you would have been able to do both as when you were in the ballet.”

After a quick nod you said, “About that, I’m not entirely certain on how the next few months will go, if I would have to fly back out again. Unfortunately I don’t believe it would be fair for me to stay on the team.”

Reluctantly they accepted your flag and rifle bag and watched you turn to the library where you confirmed with Ricky and his friends with earlier you would be eating there to avoid Harry trying to sit with you after last night.

*.*.*

“Is this a floppy disk?” Stark asked holding the top of five floppy disks from the small metal case with a triangular flip lid he was given marked ‘BigBucks’ holding the mint colored square for Rhodey to grin at the sight of it.

“She likes floppy disks. Makes them herself, should have seen the General’s face when she showed him the one for the Blackhowl flight program.”

“Kid’s got style. Classic planes, floppy disks, first model will be bodied out by the end of the week. Whole factory line is gunning to go. Everyone knows the Blackhowls can’t be touched and I’ve already got a fifty name long list of customers to buy when we start cranking them out.”

“At least if you won’t break the code you can enjoy the cash her BigBucks are gonna bring in for Stark Industries.” Rhodey said with a chuckle making Tony smirk back.

“Not about the money, I’m gonna beat Goliath,” he said waving the floppy disk in his hand he added to the container then chuckled at the usb connected floppy reader Rhodey handed him, “I’m gonna break it. I gotta be able to know what language this kid is speaking. I know I can’t beat this but I gotta at least know what language this is, because there is nothing like it, and I have looked everywhere.”

*.*.*

Alone at the empty table inside the library you muffled the open of your v8 drink you had just shaken and took a sip of it in hopes the taste would keep you from crying. Now it was hitting you how disrupting it would be to your schedule surely upsetting things far beyond the easy task of focusing on the spare time you would have on your boat or other hobbies and time with Eddie. There was now no excuse for weekly nail trips for paint jobs or reason to get after game snacks with the guys or have sneak away trips to the theater with them. Now the drift away from everything keeping you stable could start.

“Hey,” rippled through the group who came to join you with their lunches that were settled atop the table.

One of the guys said, “I got no clue how some of them managed to get into this school.”

Ricky however placed a hand on your shoulder when he noticed you were wiping your cheek to hide the tear that had broken loose from your control. “Pluto, Harry’s goons find you?”

Shaking your head you answered, “Just really wish my parents were here sometimes.” Sharply you drew in a breath and said in the smooth of his hand across your back, “Turned in my riffle and flags,” that had the guys shocked and you shook your head. “I have the medical trial and I just turned over a design for some private jets for Stark’s new airline,” you said. Dropping their jaw more in excitement than upset now, “Not all bad just an adjustment. Getting used to a new schedule, more nights off for my new jobs. I’ll still drop by to see you perform.”

One of the other guys said, “Half time is gonna suck now without you, can’t lie about that.” To which the others agreed.

Ricky said, “Tomorrow, movie night, my place. Right after the game, we are watching Dinotopia, you haven’t seen it, bring your bear sleeping bag it’s a long one,” widening a grin across your lips at the evening intended to cheer you up after the two nights of games you would otherwise miss with them.

“Professor Connors, I see you got a tan,” you said with a grin to the grateful man who gave you a nod and with his regrown hand offered you the cider he had gotten in the coffee shop having intended to meet you for your spare few minutes on the way to your first class. “Thank you.”

“Thank you,” he said turning to walk with you now smiling a bit wider, ignoring his own stares from passing students who were still getting over his new limb having been gossiping on how it happened to grow back again or if it was just a really convincing fake. “I really needed the time away. And I did,” he added with a clear of his throat to say obviously for the students listening as you passed them by, “Want to thank Misique as well. That experimental compound the Lizard set off, she saved my life, and accidentally used her atomic manipulation powers to regrow my arm in tearing the compound out of my system.” To yourself you grinned and he said a bit softer in a gap between now gossiping students, “It really means a lot to me, to have people who would be so resolute to help me.”

“I do try to be helpful when I can. I mean I’ve only lived here a few years so far and I can’t imagine what it was like before I moved here. I’m a magnet for chaos but occasionally it feels like this is the town in Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” making him chuckle.

“Vampires would be a new twist on our chaos, I have your brother’s clothes he loaned me, if you can stop by before your rehearsal.”

“Oh, I, quit the team,” making his mouth open and you shook your head, “I recently got out of a relationship and people are choosing sides. Including the team, it is easier for the team to remain intact if I step out of the equation. Plus more free time, I can get another snack and take the early train home between decathlon days.”

“Good, keep on that team, at least to summer, they do need you.” He looked you over as you took a lingering sip of the drink. “You never said you were in a relationship.”

“I thought we were friends,” making his brow arch up, “They’re 14,”

“Remember those years. Only questions, no answers.”

“I gave it a shot, they found someone who they want to give a shot to, so I stepped aside.”

“You can’t step aside every time you have a break up. For future reference.”

“Oh I can and will to keep from murdering Harry Osborn.”

“Now that’s terribly specific, he left you?”

“He kissed my girlfriend when I went out of town.”

And he nodded, “Step aside, he is not worth jail time. I get the feeling, Norman,” he shook his head, “I tried to explain your patents were tied to the study and you couldn’t just give them away to just anyone. He’s been in a mood. Then that rocket went off, it’s an Oscorp demo, I told the police, they’re investigating. No news yet.”

“He sent me such a weird congratulatory email about it too, I mean just because he pushed his kid to try and be my friend he thought he gets full dibs on my ideas. It’s as if he doesn’t know how many people die on his watch every year. Not a very flattering job offer, ‘hey come die for me’ terrible, terrible.” You said making him chuckle.

“True, enjoy your class I will see you later on.”

With a nod you replied, “See you, cider is good,” you said widening his grin.

“Why are you here?” Eddie asked having found you inside the garage with hold of the absurdly long straw you were going to weld into the end of the straw bit remaining in the end of the mast. From the rafters above ropes to help hold the straw level had been hung and made the sight all the more peculiar.

“I quit the team.”

Wide eyed he pointed at you, “I am eating that troll doll.”

“Whole school is picking sides, I didn’t want to spoil the team rehearsals and it’ll give me more time off for whatever gets thrown at me.”

Blinking at you a few times he then asked with a gesture at the straw, “Gonna weld that on?”

“Thinking about it, or at least have it hung up, the straw inside the mast already is too deep in to weld together so I have to remove a chunk to get to the straw already there.” Eldfalls gave a displeased hum making you add, “Something Eldfalls is not pleased hearing about, removing part of his perfectly intact mast.”

“Well then, I’ll bring a chair up and help you out.” He said fetching a chair from the wall to lift into the deck to join the welding torch and mask beside tools you might need then took hold of the straw you passed him so you could climb up as well.

On top of the deck you climbed up the mast to ease over the broken horizontal arm to support the base of the sail to sit down. Careful actions between what you discovered were chunks of mast to make the whole thing at the first scan of the mast helped to stir a stunning snap and fizzle of the connections. Followed by more on the underside of the thick mast Eddie helped you to wiggle the seventy pound chunk off the broken straw piece to stand up on its side. “Oh wow,” Eddie said peering up at the straw that was about shattered on the end coated in spider web like stress fractures. “That is not good.”

“I have a foot and a half spare length. I figure we cut off here,” you said holding a hand up flat to mark the location a couple inches from the near breaking end. “And it should be safer.”

“Fair plan, and you’ll still have a few inches to play with on the end.” He answered and watched you add the visor and lifted the welding torch you used to heat up the end and used the ellipse tool that had been used earlier Elliot had shared would help with this task via your latest email on how to handle this task. Supporting the straw on the healthy end of the breaks with your free hand the smaller loop was eased around the end to be pulled sharply through the metal to let the end fall to the deck. “That went well,” he said leaning in as you did to inspect the new end then leaned back to help bring the new length of straw to line up with where you wanted to join it. Carefully around the seam you welded with the torch, using the bee inside the straw you made certain not to seal it off internally.

Over your head the chunk removed, once the new seam was smoothed down to have a streamline exterior, was lifted to ease around the straw. At each rope support point Eddie unhooked the sling connection there to let you wiggle it on deeper to the next section he moved until the very end where he took hold of the chunk to let you climb onto the mast again. Inside the connections were made and the fizzle for the first latch faded once the final one was secured.

A box you had brought from your apartment held the pieces of the next chunk that for the filming bees you had Eddie’s help in assembling the next seventy pound chunk that for your own contained glee fizzled as the original chunk within the connection process. Eldfalls pleasantly hummed at the latest new parts and care you had given to the removal and additions. Always you had shown care in the roughest of tasks, which he highly appreciated, having been through the pain of being broken apart now being reassembled to have you care so much of his pains made the process all the more special to himself and heightened the bond he harbored for his new pilot.

Just the straw and one chunk were all you could manage to have created at this time and for now you had to leave him in supports until the rest of the mast could be completed. So for now Eddie marched you up to his place to have dinner and to come up with a workable schedule based on how long the first chunk took to be printed around what would be guessed to be the schedule coming up to complete it.

He didn’t want to be upset but he knew you were, and like always did try to show you that you could be angry about things that went wrong without internalizing it all the time, at least when alone with him. At least for him he had his spare sweats back that he was able to offer you to wear to curl up with him to not be alone tonight.

Pt 39

@devilishminx328. @theincaprincess, @lilith15000, @jesevans, @jiminapickle

#Escaped Child Assassin #Gwen Stacy x OC #exes #Eddie Brock #Venom #harry osborn #Steve Rogers #Supportive Friends #Magical Ship #Ship Repairs #Supportive Big Brother #Hard Times #Teenage Drama #Tony Stark #Lt Rhodes #Marvel #Gwen Stacy

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