#my head still hurts but i ate an ice cream sandwich after drawing this so im feeling better now :3

[koishisjumpscaremansion]

[our-smooty]

Flowerbeds and Fertile Soil: Chapter 5

Fandom: Good Omens

Rating: Explicit

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens, )Anathema Device/Newton Pulsifer

Tags:  Kidfic, Mpreg kind of, they can choose to present however so idk, Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Crowley Has A Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has A Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has A Vulva (Good Omens), OCs Galor, parenting, using your snake form to avoid confrontation, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pregnancy, if I missed a tag lemme know

Summary: They could do anything, go anywhere, all without the worry of Above or Bellow making a fuss. Even so, they mostly kept to their little patch of Eden, their cottage and garden and the simple life they’d carved out among the locals. Aziraphale opened a book shop in town, where he only occasionally sold any books (and the ones he did sell, were all modern and stocked specifically for that purpose). Crowley focused his attentions on the garden, and if he occasionally helped their elderly neighbour with her disobedient willow tree, then that was a secret no one needed to know. Lately, however, they had both been feeling rather restless, unbeknownst to each other. Aziraphale tried reorganizing his store, changing the way he tied his bowtie and even ate pizza –something he considered to be far too messy for him personally. Crowley had branched out into birdwatching, and then car maintenance (the human way), and even reading. Nothing scratched the itch for either of them.

Ao3 Link

My Ko-Fi

3 days later, they finally wore each other out. By the end of the last day Crowley was practically incapable of speaking and Aziraphale was a jittering mass of sensation. They stopped when the mutual shaking of their bodies made it nearly impossible to continue. Shortly thereafter, they both fell asleep after a very half-hearted miracle from the demon to clean things up. Crowley couldn’t have cared less himself but knew the angel would be very uncomfortable and upset when the woke up if they didn’t get clean. It was the least he could do, after innumerable orgasms. 

Crowley’s sleep was deep and dreamless which was rare for him. Even all those times when he napped away months and decades there had been frequent strange--sometimes upsetting--dreams that forced him awake. It was probably one of the reasons those naps lasted so long; it was hard to feel rested if you can’t actually rest. But this time Crowley was out like one of Aziraphale’s Heavenly lights for just two days, practically a catnap, and when he woke he felt hazy, but rejuvenated. 

With a satisfied sigh and a great big stretch, Crowley burrowed under to covers, a stupid smile on his face. He felt fantastic, especially since his sleep had let him skip any muscle soreness. All that was left was the pleasant buzzing of a very satisfied libido. Again he reached down to touch his lower belly, something akin to giddy nervousness. Would he know right away? Or would he have to wait like any old human? It wasn’t like there was a president. 

In the end he didn’t spend too much time luxuriating in their bed. Mostly because he could hear Aziraphale downstairs and the idea of getting some morning snuggles--even if it was nearly noon--appealed to him greatly. The getting up and getting dressed part was only a little tricky; even after three days his legs still felt a little wobbly, but in the end he managed it without using a miracle. Comfy clothes in place Crowley made a quick pit stop in the bathroom to brush his teeth, then meandered down the stairs into the living room where he knew Aziraphale would be curled up with a book and a cuppa. 

“Hello dearest,” Aziraphale greeted, setting his book aside to pat the couch beside him. Crowley folded himself into the space and over the angel’s lap. “Did you have a good rest?”

Crowley nodded making a grabbing gesture for Aziraphale’s cup of tea, which he was passed very without complaint. Contrary to his taste in coffee, Crowley liked his tea very sweet and milky, which luckily lined up with his lover’s tastes exactly. He handed the cup back to Aziraphale and nuzzled further into the angel’s shoulder. “Lunch?”

Aziraphale wiggled happily, setting the tea aside with his book and drawing Crowley in closer. “I heard that the pub in town has been getting very fresh produce this summer and have been using it to make the most delicious tea sandwiches.”

“Sounds good angel, they have that cider too, yeah? The kind with ginger in it?” The sandwiches he could take or leave, and usually he’d give his portion to Aziraphale just to watch him enjoy them. Alcohol though was always something he enjoyed. 

“Yes, but I think we should be avoiding that now, shouldn't we?” Crowley frowned in confusion for a few seconds before he groaned. 

“Aziraphale… We don’t even know if its--If I’m--” He was really going to have to get over this inability to talk about it. 

“Still, it’s good to get into the habit, and I’m sure they have some lovely non-alcoholic drinks we can enjoy.”

“We? S’not like you can’t drink,” he groused, fiddling with the buttons on Aziraphale’s waistcoat, thoroughly prepared to throw himself into an epic sulk. 

Aziraphale made a considering noise. “It wouldn’t be fair though, would it? I don’t think I’d feel right, indulging while you can’t.” That made him feel… something. Grateful maybe? Or embarrassed. Either way it calmed him down enough to avert a really moody disaster. Curse Aziraphale for being so attentive and sweet and not giving Crowley any reason to have a really good brood. 

“Fine. But I’m ordering the most expensive, most complicated drink they have. And I might even send it back,” Crowley grumped. Aziraphale giggled and pressed a kiss to the demon’s sleep-mussed hair, which was entirely too pleasant for the simple gesture it was. It made Crowley want to turn into a snake and curl up in the angel’s lap and forget about going for lunch. 

“I wouldn’t expect anything else, my dear. Shall we get ready to go? I’m sure you don’t want to go out in your loungewear.” It was Crowley’s turn to laugh and plant a kiss on the angel’s cheek with an exasperated eye-roll.

“They’re trackies angel, not loungewear. You’re such an old man.” He still didn’t get off the sofa though. “No idea why I want to have your k-kid, to be honest.”

“Love probably has something to do with it,” Aziraphale teased lightly. Crowley grumbled but didn’t deny anything. Not like he could have, with how badly he was blushing. Damn these human corporations and their vascular systems. 

“Shut up,” he groused, snuggling further into the warmth and softness of his lover’s well-worn jacket. “When do you want to leave?” Crowley knew it was best to let the angel set the pace, lest Aziraphale get himself into a tizzy.

Aziraphale considered briefly before nodding decisively. “I think I’d like to remain here for a little while, if that’s alright. I’m enjoying just sitting here with you.”

“Mmm, fine with me. You’re warm.” His snakey nature shone through in moments like this, and Crowley had the secret suspicion that Aziraphale had been gradually increasing his natural body temperature since they had begun living together to cater to his reptilian side. He couldn’t find the will to complain about it. 

“Splendid. We’ll head out in a little bit.” Aziraphale used the hand not around Crowley’s shoulders to reclaim his tea and they took turns sipping. If the tea lasted longer than it really should have between them, Crowley was willing to let it slide because it gave him more time to cuddle up to his angel. Miraculously, the pub would have a large number of tea sandwiches still ready and fresh when they got there, despite the fact they regularly sold out. 

The next 2 months were a flurry of sex, cuddling, and preparation for Pulcifer-Device child number three. They were eventually forced to stop their near-constant state of being in bed or recovering from being in bed to watch Lottie and Annabella while Anathema and Newt made final preparations--and got as much sleep as possible before--their newest addition. Luckily their South Downs cottage was already equipped with a room specially made for the girls and they were both more than prepared to watch them for at least a week at a time. Though they still paniced occasionally becuause raising the Anti-Christ was one thing, especially since they really hadn’t been raising him so much as influence. Taking care of and watching over two little girls who they were invested in was entirely another. 

In the final week before Anathema was due Aziraphale had offered to have Lottie and Bella stay over at the cottage until the baby arrived. Anathema had readily agreed--probably desperate to get some rest before the big day--and Newt had brought them and all of their supplies over. As far as they knew, this was just another fun trip to spend some time with their uncles, and not a brief respite for their parents. Crowley did not envy Anathema and Newt having to deal with two children under 5 all the time.

“Crowley, why are the girls eating ice cream for breakfast?” Aziraphale asked as he strolled into the kitchen on the second day. Both Annabella and Charlotte had heaping servings of chocolate ice cream in front of them, and on them, and on the table. It was an impressive mess. Crowley glanced up from where he’d been scrolling through his phone and shrugged. 

“They asked for it. Figured after the tummy aches set in they’ll never ask again, or this’ll be one of those “fantastic childhood memories” humans like so much.” Aziraphale tutted and snapped, changing the bowls of ice cream to whole wheat pancakes and fruit. Lottie sighed dramatically but didn’t complain too much because the angel had made sure to stack her plate high with strawberries, which were her favourite. Bella on the other hand was only three and did not appreciate her sugary feast being replaced. Crowley saw the subtle chin wobble and furrowing of her tiny brow and immediately glared at Aziraphale. 

“Big mistake angel,” he drawled just as she took in a  deep breath. Aziraphale gave him a confused look before the situation seemed to strike him all at once. It was too late though, because in the next second she let out an ear-piercing screech that could have rivalled Beezlebub on a bad day. “At least the ice cream was keeping them quiet.”

“You can't give children pure sugar for breakfast, Crowley! It’s not good for them and I would expect you to know better!” Aziraphale near-shouted, wringing his hands this way and that as he hovered around his youngest god-daughter. Lottie was still calmly eating her strawberries and making a mess out the pancakes by squishing them up and pushing them off the plate. It was a far cry from the peace Crowley had created with the ice cream.

“You think I didn’t miracle away most of the sugar and other gunk before giving it to them? I’m not an amateur Aziraphale.” Crowley rolled his eyes and stood, procuring a can of whipped cream from thin air and dolloping a fair-sized amount on each girl's portion. Almost immediately Bella began to quiet, but Crowley wasn’t finished. “Use your words, Bella. What do you say to Uncle Aziraphale and your sister?”

She squirmed and pouted before relenting. “Sorry for yelling.”

“Good, now finish your breakfast and then we can go to the park yeah?” She nodded happily and began to dig into her food. “And Charlotte for Somebody's sake stop making a mess and just eat your food. You aren’t a baby and you don’t need to mush it up, do you?”

Aziraphale watched with wide eyes as Crowley completely diffuse the situation he had created. The demon could feel his nervous, unsure energy from across the room. He vanished the whipped cream--because he knew his god-daughters well enough not to trust them around it without close supervision--and gave the angel a pat on the shoulder. “S’not good to spring stuff on them like that angel. Besides, it’s gonna be confusing enough for them when the baby shows up, might as well let them have some fun.”

“I didn’t think--I’m sorry dear.” Aziraphale physically deflated. “I’m rubbish with children, aren’t I?”

Crowley sighed and pulled Aziraphale into his side, not trapping him in a hug just in case Bella’s screaming earlier had been too overwhelming. “You just need some practise angel. We can work on it.”

“No more sugary stuff for breakfast though, alright dear? Even if you do make it healthier, I don’t want them going back homing and demanding sweets.” Crowley supposed that was fair, though he might still sneak the girls a little something when Aziraphale wasn’t looking. It was only right, especially with how busy Anathema and Newt would be with the new baby over the next few months. 

“Sure. Are you coming to the park with us?” Crowley asked, nuzzling into Aziraphale’s jawline and taking in a big whiff of that familiar sunlight and book glue smell. Normally Crowley could do this for hours, basking in the fact that he was allowed to do something as absurd as sniff his angel now, but this time there was something wrong. Aziraphale smelled off and bad and Crowley jerked back, automatically throwing a hand over his mouth while sprinting to the sink. 

“Crowley?” Aziraphale asked, voice dripping with concern. “Crowley, what’s wrong?”

At the table, Charlotte and Annabella looked up from their breakfasts with wide eyes. “Uncle Azi is Uncle Crowley alrigh--ahh!” Bella screamed as Crowley heaved over the kitchen sink and threw up the coffee he’d had for breakfast. And then the remnants of the chips he’d stolen from Aziraphale’s plate the night before. And then, when there was nothing left, he kept retching and retching until he could taste the bitter-poison taste of bile coat his tongue.

“Crowley!” Aziraphale said again, rushing over and holding back the demon’s hair to prevent any more sick getting stuck in it. “Oh goodness, what happened? Are you ill; can demons even get sick? Tell me what to do!”

“Ngk--shhhh” Crowley hissed, spitting the last of the sick in his mouth out into the sink and gagging at the smell. “M’fine, need water.” Immediately there was a glass of ice cold water being thrust into his hand and fluttering hands combing through his hair. The water helped with the bad taste and with the strange, unexpected nausea, but I didn't do anything for the sudden dizziness he felt. “Think I’m… I’m gonna pass out..”

The edges of his vision began to fade out as his ears began to ring. Faintly he could hear Bella and Lottie’s upset little voices talking over Aziraphale’s equally panicked one, followed by a firm grip keeping him mostly upright and the shattering of glass. Angel’s could be strong, when they needed to be. Crowley sagged into Aziraphale’s arms bonelessly and completely out of it. He wasn’t sure if seconds or minutes had passed but eventually things began to calm down and right themselves. His vision came back--when everything had gone fully black and reddish he wasn’t sure--and he could distinctly hear the sound of Aziraphale asking Lottie to get him Crowley’s cell phone from the table. It sounded like the angel was about to call someone, but who? 999 wasn’t exactly equipped to deal with occult beings passing out in their kitchens. 

“Zzzzira?” he slurred, wondering when they had gotten on the floor. “Wha’happened?”

“I’m not sure dear,” Aziraphale’s voice was shaking, clearly terrified. “You were throwing up and then you just… you just fainted. How are you feeling now?”

It was still difficult to string thoughts together, but Crowley knew he needed to for Aziraphale and the girls. “Hot, kinda sick. You smelled… wrong. Who’re you calling?”

“I-I’m not sure. I thought maybe one of our friends, Madame Tracy is a bit of a Jack of All Trades, she might know what to do…”

“Absolutely not. She’ll bring Shadwell and I don’t think I can deal with him right now,” he groaned, wiggling into a sitting position. “I’m already feeling better angel, I’m OK.”

“Uncle Crowley?” a tiny voice to his left called out. Both girls stood back a few feet, clutching at each other and looking entirely too worried. If Crowley thought worrying Aziraphale was bad, he was entirely unprepared for the way those scared faces made him feel. 

“Come’ere,” he said, opening his arms so they could each bury themselves in one of his shoulders. Aziraphale leaned in too, wrapping his arms around Crowley’s waist and pulling him close to his chest. “I’m alright, sorry I scared you.”

“You threw up and passed out Crowley, I wouldn’t call that alright in any sense of the word,” Aziraphale murmured into his hair. “Can you tell me what happened, at least?”

Crowley thought for a bit, idly twisting and playing with the girls’ hair. “I was OK and then I smelled you and it made me feel sick, and then I was on the floor,” he explained, starting a more complicated braid in Lottie’s hair. “You didn’t smell any different than normal but it was just… not good.”

Behind him Aziraphale hummed. “I still think we should call someone.” Crowley grunted and refused to respond, hoping that if he didn’t acknowledge it that Aziraphale would drop the idea. Besides, he felt fine now, maybe a little weak, but in general ok. In front of him Bella squirmed out of his grip, wrinkling her nose at the smell from the sink. 

“It’s like mummy,” she said, pinching her nose. Both Crowley and Aziraphale’s head snapped towards her. 

“What do you mean, sweety?” 

Bella made a face and stuck her tongue out in disgust. “Mummy got sick, when the baby was starting to grow in her tummy.” Suddenly, everything clicked into place and Crowley’s stomach dropped and fluttered at the same time. Aziraphale went inhumanly still at his back; no breathing, no heartbeat.

“Morning sickness…” Crowley wheezed, the plait he was working on slipping from his fingers. “Makes sense, the sensitivity to smells, the sick, the dizziness.”

“Does it?” Aziraphale squeaked. Crowley laughed a little, surprised at how out-of-depth the angel sounded. 

“Didn’t you watch over Eve in the Garden?”

“Yes but--!” Aziraphale blustered. “I didn’t ask about those things Crowley, that would have been rude!”

“Oh of course,” Crowley intoned. The only reason he didn’t roll his eyes was because he was worried it might make him dizzy again. “Wouldn’t want to ask anything inappropriate.”

“Quite.” They fell silent again outside of Bella’s continued complaints about the smell. “Wait does this mean you’re--?”

“Yup,” Crowley answered his voice wobbling up and down in a distinctly freaked-out way. “Also, I need you to get a bucket, cause I’m pretty sure I’m about to get sick everywhere again in about 10 seconds.”

[rewritingstevenuniverse-blog]

Gem Glow-S1 ep 1 Rewritten

[Trans. Ext. Big Donut]

Steven: Nooooooooooooo!

[Trans. Int. Big Donut]

Steven :This can’t be happening! This has to be a dream! Lars! Lars! *grabs Lars around waist* Please tell me I’m dreaming!

Lars :*shakes Steven off* Get off me man, I’m stocking here!

Sadie: I’m sorry, Steven. I guess they stopped making them.

Steven :Stopped making them?! Why in the world would they stop making Cookie Cats?! They’re only the most scrumptious and delicious ice-cream sandwich ever made! Don’t they have laws for this?!

Lars :*kneels in front of cabinet and sighs* Tough bits, man. Nobody buys them anymore. *stocks shelves* I guess they couldn’t compete with Lion Lickers.

Steven: *groans* *walks over to the Lion Licker’s display case* Not Lion Lickers!. Nobody likes them! They don’t even look like lions! Kids these days — I’ll tell ya what!

Lars :*chuckles* Well, if you miss your ice cream so much, why don’t you make some with your “magic belly button”? *laughs*

Steven :That’s not how it works, Lars, you idiot! … Right? *holds stomach and sighs* *stomach jiggles* Oh, sweet Cookie Cats, *draws a cookie cat on the freezer with his finger* with your crunchy cookie outside and your icy creamy insides… you were too good for this world. *kisses freezer as a single tear rolls down his face*

Sadie :Uh… Steven? You okay?

(Steven doesn’t reply as he hugs the freezer,audibly sobbing now.)

(Lars turns from the counter and looks at Steven.)

Sadie: Do you want to take the freezer with you?

(Steven nods.)

[Trans. Ext. Beach House]

(Steven hums “Cookie Cat” while running home,now in a completely different mood.)

[Trans. Int. Beach House]

(Pearl, Amethyst, and Garnet are fighting a horde of Centipeetles.)

Steven:Hey, guys! you won’t believe this!

(Steven is suddenly attacked by a Centipeetle.)

(Centipeetle roars, Steven screams.)

Amethyst :*uses whip to yank Centipeetle off Steven* ‘Sup, Steven? *grunts*

(Gems fight off centipeetles.)

Steven: Awesome! What are these things?

Pearl: *lifts up Centipeetle, groans* Ugh! Sorry, Steven. We’ll get all these corrupted gems out of your room. We think they were trying to get into the temple.

Steven :Aw. You don’t have to get rid of them. They’re really cool.

(The Centipeetle that Pearl is holding spits acid onto the floor. Steven and Pearl look down into the new hole.)

Amethyst: *poofs a Centipeetle and picks her nose* Um, you guys? These things don’t have gems.

Garnet: That means there must be a mother somewhere nearby.

(A Centipeetle sneaks up from beside her as she quickly punches it causing it to poof.)

Pearl: We should probably find it before a human gets hurt.

Steven: *excitedly* Oh! Oh! Can I come?! Can I?! can I?!

Pearl :Steven, until you learn to control the powers in Rose’s gem, *snaps Centipeetle’s neck while Steven watches in glee* we’ll take care of protecting humanity, okay? We don’t want Rose’s only son to get hurt trying to summon his weapon!

Steven: Aw, man. *notices a Centipeetle raiding the fridge* Hey! Get out of there! Go on! Shoo! Shoo! Aw! they got into everything! Not cool! *Garnet punches and poofs it as he notices that the fridge is full of Cookie Cats* No way. I-it can’t be! Wha-where did you get these?! I thought they stopped making them!

Pearl: Well, we heard that, too, and since they’re your favorite…

Amethyst :We went out and stole a bunch.

Pearl: *grunts at Amethyst angrily* I went back and paid for them.

Garnet:The whole thing was my idea. *retracts gauntlets back to her gems*

Amethyst: It was everyone’s idea.

Garnet:Not really.

Pearl :All that matters is that Steven is happy.

(Steven,overjoyed, sings the “Cookie Cat” song.)

(Gems burst out in laughter and applause.)

Steven: I can’t believe you did this. I’m gonna save these forever! Right after I eat this one. Hello, old friend. *bites into one* Oh, so good! (Steven’s gem begins to glow-Steven is oblivious while the Gems freak out.) I like to eat the ears first.

Amethyst :Uh, Steven…

Steven: Wha-? My gem!

Amethyst :Quick, try and summon your weapon!

Steven :I don’t know how! *panicking* Ah, its fading! How do I make it come back?!

Pearl :Calm down, Steven. Breathe, don’t force it.

Amethyst: Yeah, and try not to poop yourself either.

Garnet: Please, don’t.(The hint of a smile is visible on her face)

(Gem glow fades away, collective sigh.)

Steven: Ah, I was really close that time! Can one of you just explain how to summon a weapon?

Pearl :*singsong voice* Oh, I’ll go first!

[Trans. Ext. Hill with a blossoming tree whose petals are falling]

Pearl: Pay attention to these petals, Steven. The petals’ dance seems improvised, but it is being calculated in real time based on the physical properties of this planet. With hard work and dedication, you can master the magical properties of your gem and perform your own dance,just like Rose did! *summons spear* Like so.

[Trans. Ext. the Big Donut]

Steven: *picks up pile of petals and tosses them in the air* Wah!

Amethyst :Did Pearl tell you the “petal thing”?

Steven :Yeah, I need to practice really hard so I can dance like a tree… I think.

Amethyst :Listen Steven, all that practice stuff is just garbage. Whenever I really need to summon my weapon, it just happens. Like this!

(Amethyst summons her whip and breaks a garbage container in two.)

Amethyst :See? Didn’t try at all.

Lars :*runs out back and drops trash bag* Huh?! Again?!

[Trans. Ext. top of Crystal Temple near light house]

Steven: So I’m supposed to work really hard and not try at all at the same time?

Garnet :Yes. Or… you could link your mind with the energy of all existing matter. Channeling the collective power of the universe through your gem, which results in— *summons her gauntlets* At least that’s my way of doin’ it.

[Trans. Int. Beach House kitchen]

Steven: I think my best bet is to recreate what happened the last time my gem glowed. So… *points* Garnet and Amethyst were here. Pearl was next to the fridge. Hmm. Amethyst, I think your arms were crossed?

Amethyst :Okay, your majesty. *crosses arms*

Steven:And Pearl, your foot was like this. *moves it at the angle it was*

Pearl :I don’t think it works this way, Steven.

Steven: And Garnet, uh… *moves her face upward* Yeah.

Steven: Then I took a bite of this Cookie Cat. Oh, wait! I sang the song first. Uh, he’s a frozen treat, all new taste, interstellar war, now available at Ghurven’s. Aww, it was funnier last time. *sigh* Maybe I’m not a real Crystal Gem.

Garnet: *bends down next to Steven* Don’t be silly, Steven. Of course you are.

Amethyst :And you’re fun to have around, even if your gem is useless.

(Pearl glares angrily at Amethyst.)

Amethyst :I… mean, you’re one of us, Steven. We’re not the Crystal Gems without you!

(Garnet nods.)

Steven: Yeah, even if I don’t have powers, I’ve still got… Cookie Cat! *takes a bite* Mmm, so good.

(Steven’s gem glows then summons his shield, collective gasp.)

Pearl :*amazed* Steven, it’s a shield!

Steven :Whoa, what?! I get a shield?! Oooh… yeah!

(He accidentally launches his shield which ricochets around the room, breaking a TV.Amethyst bursts out laughing while Pearl puts her hand to her head.)

Pearl:Just like his Mother(shakes her head slightly)

Steven: Huh? Cookie Cat! I summon my weapon by eating ice cream!

Pearl :*picks up wrapper* What’s in these things?

(The house rumbles.)

Steven: What was that?

[Trans. Ext. Crystal Temple]

(The Gems and Steven look as the Centipeetle Mother and several other Centipeetles crawl up the temple.)

Garnet: It’s the Mother! *leaps towards it*

Pearl :Stay in the house, Steven!

Steven:No way, I’m coming too! *goes back to grab several Cookie Cats and freezer*

(The Gems chase the Mother which leads them to the back of the Temple and she attacks, the Gems take cover behind a broken hand statue as acid is pouring over the side.)

Amethyst :We could really use Roses’s shield right about now!

Steven: *chucks pebble at Mother* Hey! *plants freezer in ground* Leave them alone!

Gems(though Pearl is by far the most audible): Steven, no!

Steven :Cookie Cat Crystal combo powers, activate! *eats a Cookie Cat and nothing happens* Uh-oh. Aaaah! *retreats further back*

Pearl :We need to save Steven!

Amethyst :Can we save ourselves first?!

Steven:Goodbye, my friends. *eats several Cookie Cats and nothing happens* Why isn’t it working? *retreats once more*

Garnet: Steven! *holds back Mother’s pincers*

Steven: *sees destroyed freezer, gasps* No… Oh, no no no!… *slowly* Cookie Cat, he’s a pet for your tummy. Cookie Cat, he’s super duper yummy! *picks up freezer, more aggressively* Cookie Cat, he left his family behind! Cookie Caaat! *chucks freezer at Mother which shocks her, causing her to screech in pain* Now available… nowhere.

Amethyst: Yes!

Garnet:Gems, weapons!

(The Gems summon their weapons.) Let’s do it.

(Gems burst from cover and attack all at once,Garnet leaps and pulls Steven out off the way of some poison. All Gems set to work,destroying the mother, a gem falls and Garnet bubbles it away.)

Steven:(Picking up a Cookie Cat wrapper) Farewell, sweet Cookie Cats. I’ll always remember the time we spent together. *stomach rumbles* Shh, hush now.

Amethyst :Are you crying?

Steven: *shouts* Only a little!

Amethyst :Well, I guess your powers don’t come from ice cream.

Pearl :Of course they don’t come from ice cream. Don’t worry, Steven, I’m sure some day you’ll figure out how to activate your gem.

Garnet: Yes, in your own Steven-y way.

Steven: I’m okay guys. I just- *stomach rumbles* Ugh, I think I ate too many Cookie Cats.

(Gems laugh, Steven laughs anxiously, then retches.)

Amethyst: You may love the Cookie Cats,Steven, but I don’t think they love you.

[END]

I didn’t really change too much,since I found this to be a fairly solid episode,especially for a show now starting out.