#my hands are stiff now yayyyy

[evimortem]

“We knew you’d end up here”

Wanted to try out a new technique to create more realistic art

[markie-baby]

If You Love Me | pt.1

🌹AngstFluff/Smut (18+ MA) Part II 🌹Black Female Reader x Mark Tuan 🌹shower sex 🌹Your boyfriend Mark has been away on his first solo tour for his album, The Other Side. You haven't seen him in months and something is...off. Now that he's back home, there are a few things you need to get off your chest.

You stared intently at the last text messages your boyfriend sent you.

(7:00 pm) Markie-moo💜: I just landed😁

(7:05 pm) YAYYYY💕 can't wait to see youuuuuuu

(7:05 pm) you sure you don't need me to pick you up?

Read 7:09 pm.

(7:10 pm) Markie-moo💜: I'm sure😊 I need to go by the studio real quick, then I'll be omw

(7:10 pm) Markie-moo💜: I can't wait to see you, beautiful🖤 I've missed you so much

(7:15 pm) Okay💕 Let me know when you're otw home... I've missed you more!

Read 8:30 pm.

You glanced up at the time on your screen...It's 11pm.

"Your father is very late." You sighed at Milo, who could only look up at you and tilt his head as if he understood the severity of you using the word 'Father' and not 'Daddy'.

The television screen shined through the tall bottle of red wine that sat on your living room table, which casted a shadow on an open bag of gummy bears. You already started snacking on them an hour into waiting for Mark to get to your apartment, and only just realized that you obliterated half the box already. You spent the past three days gearing up for Mark's arrival from his first album tour; aimlessly cleaning your place, cooking all of Mark's favorite foods, buying wine, and meticulously sprinkling rose petals all over the bedroom. You even got dressed up and wore that perfume he liked on you... only to find yourself feeling silly, scratching the belly of his furry baby, as your bones grew stiff waiting for him.

Regrettably, you couldn't deny that you weren't surprised he was a little late. The strongest part of your relationship with Mark was first and foremost, honesty. Mark hated lies and had never told you one himself. Which is why it was so obvious that he has been lying for the past few months. Badly. I was stuck at the studio and I lost track of time, being the most frequently used of the bunch. You'd find him speaking in a low tone for phone calls, rarely letting you use his phone or laptop, and getting absorbed into his phone screen. He started becoming distant... becoming someone completely different from the man you met. You started suspecting he was cheating.

You moved to LA six years ago to pursue owning a business and had no intentions of having a long-term relationship. Mark was a little timid towards you when you first met him through a mutual friend. He never said much outside of the realm of "Hi", "How are you", and "How are you doing?" But as you stuck around more and more, you couldn't help but be drawn to him. You felt connected talking to him about your aspirations, hopes, and fears, knowing that he was always there to listen and share some of those same feelings. It also helped that Mark was (and still is) the most beautiful man you've ever met in your life. Every time you met up with him, you found yourself drinking up all his features; from his pink, heart-shaped lips that opened to a breath-taking smile, to his deep, dark, entrancing eyes. The last time you got lost in Mark's eyes as his best friend, was when your business hit an all-time low.

~

"I just don't know, Mark..." you sobbed through clogged sinuses. "I don't think I can't still support myself if my business can't make more sales."

Mark was only inches away from you on your couch as you cried into your fetal position.

"Hey, hey..." Mark gently placed his warm hands on your shoulders. "Don't think like that. You've done amazing so far... There has to be something else you can do to get your sales up."

"Well..." You poked your head out briefly. "I could do more marketing... but I already spent so much money on marketing and-"

The tears started reforming in your sore eyes as you hid your head back into your knees. Silence hung in the air like a bad joke as the idea of complete failure circled in your head... You would have to leave the life you worked so hard to build in LA, only to return home to square one, with your tail between your legs. You weren't ready to leave your hard work, your home, your friends, or Mark...

"Y/N..." You felt Mark leaning closer to you with a rasp in his voice. "Look at me."

You reluctantly looked into the eyes of your friend, and suddenly, all the anxiety and fear that you felt only seconds ago, felt like forgotten emotions. His eyes seem to pull you into their calming, deep brown pools.

"Ever since I met you, I have seen you fight and work hard for this. I've admired your passion, and how dedicated you are to your dreams... It's one of my favorite things about you. You can't give up on this now. Not after you worked this hard. Not after you've built this life for yourself all on your own... Not to mention how hard it would be to say goodbye to you if you leave."

"Mark..." You felt your heartbeat in your throat.

"I care about you... and I hate seeing you struggling like this. If you need help, why didn't you ask me?"

"I just didn't want to inconvenience you... I know you've been busy in the studio and doing photoshoots I-... just figured that could do this on my own. Like I've always done everything on my own."

Mark's eyes trailed yours, slowly inching to your nose then your lips...

"You don't have to do this alone." You felt Mark snake his long fingers in between yours. "I'll be there for you... like always."

The bubble developing in your throat was an indication that the waterworks were rising again. Up to this point, Mark has been the most supportive, honest, sweetest, considerate, and the most chill person in your life. He's always been there to listen to whatever you had to tell him; what you see each other doing in the next few years, or a late-night drunken rant about pineapples on pizza. And whenever Mark called, you would drop everything just to hear how his day was. Whenever you hung out with him, you could be alone or in a group of other people, it was like it was just you two. Your soul mate...

You looked into Mark's eyes again, feeling your heart start to race... in your trance, your eyes wandered across his face, admiring how the low glow of the Livingroom television showed his soft textured skin. How his hair was poofy since he raced over to you from his nap. Sometimes you felt like you didn't deserve someone this amazing and supportive to be in your court. But Mark was just your cute little blessing on top of all the other ones. Overcome with emotion, you crash into Mark's arms and held him tight.

"Thank you so much, Mark. For everything." Your stress left your body in a big sigh. "I love you..."

You felt Mark's arms around your waist slowly pull you closer to his body and his face buried into the crook of your neck.

"I love you more..."

You replayed his response in your head as you held on to him.

"I love you more" Thump.

"I love you more" Thump-Thump.

"I love you more" Thump. Thump-Thump-Thump. Thump.

Your heart started to race. Goosebumps raised when Mark's breath lightly brushed your neck, and you felt his strong heartbeat thump against your chest. What was this feeling? You were scared to pull away, frightened of getting lost in his gaze again.

"Um, right s-so..." You cleared your throat. "Thanks again, Markie."

You tried pulling away... but found that Mark's grip was still tight around you.

"Wait..." He spoke in a low tone that made your spine shiver.

Your heart felt like it was going to climb out of your mouth. Of course, you've been this close to Mark plenty of times before, you guys have practically held hands before. But there has never been this type of tension hanging in the air. It was almost suffocating. You looked into Mark's eyes for some sort of sign... but damn, he was looking so gorgeous. Your eyes traced his whole face; every curve of his pink lips, every line in his jaw & every eyelash sitting upon his beautiful eyes. Oh, his eyes... they seemed to sparkle... and they were intently fixed on your mouth. Instinctively, your hands made their way up to his jawline, which produced a small sigh from Mark's parted lips.

He was slowly closing the space between your faces. The heat started to rise in between your ears, as you battled with the thought of kissing your best friend. If you did, you could be either making the best decision of your life... or ruining a friendship with a man you cared for deeply. But you couldn't deny... you wanted him. With every heavy breath that Mark breathed, with every second his hands tightened around your thighs, with every inch that his lips drew closer to yours... your desire for him grew. The realization that you loved him grew.

"Mark-"

With the most genuine softness, Mark closed the painful gap between both pairs of lips. Both of your bodies were lost in each other... neither of you realized just how steamy your little make-out session got. You became a couple shortly after, with this year being your third year together.

~

With each passing day, you felt more frustrated in your conflicted feelings. On one side, you were upset at him... but more at yourself for letting the situation grow. On the other hand, you felt the yearning for him grow hot and restless in your core, and eventually, you couldn't help but touch yourself out of the thought of him. The way his dark, loose curls flop over his forehead, the sparkle in his eyes, the sincerity of his smile, the sweetest of his cologne, the slight curve of his lips, the softness of his skin, the heat of his breath-

You snap out of your trance when you hear the jingle of keys at the door. You tap your screen back to life. It's 11:55 pm.

"I'm home!" Mark poked his head through the door at beamed at you on the couch.

"Mark..." You couldn't help but sigh.

"Babe!" Mark cheesed the brightest smile you've ever seen as his chest collided with yours.

His arms tightly squeezed around your waist as you heard him drink in your scent. Finally, your boyfriend was home, with a bouquet as bright as his smile. Almost instinctively, your nerves weakened in his warm embrace, and you melted around him. You forgot about everything you were ever upset about. With every bone in your aching body, you wanted to hold him... feel his skin gently graze yours, caress his adorable face, and shower him in kisses... but he still broke his promise. The one person in your life who was always truthful, real, and loyal... wasn't anymore.

"I missed you so, so much..." Mark whispered into your ear.

"Mark..." You pulled away from him. "What took you so long..."

"I'm sorry," He sighed. "I got tied up again-"

"Mark I..." You paused. "I've spent all of the past 3 days preparing all this stuff for you. And I have been... trying so hard to be so excited for you to come home. For you be in my arms again, to kiss you, to make absolute love to you..."

"What?" Mark's eyes widened.

"We need to talk about something."

Mark's smile slowly started to fade and the bouquet slowly lowered from his grasp.

"You've broken the one promise that we've had in this relationship... you lied to me, Mark. And you've been doing it over and over... And I'd hope that our bond was strong enough for you to realize that I would notice that."

"Hey-"

Mark gently placed the bouquet on the kitchen counter and held both of your hands in his.

"Do you truly think I'm cheating on you?"

You looked longingly into his eyes, only to be handed a cold, serious gaze in return.

"No," You bit your lip in hesitation. "You wouldn't do something like that. But I don't know what to think, Mark."

Mark sighed deeply...

"I leave for months and come back to a fight..." He scratched the back of his head in frustration. "You said that the one promise we made in this relationship was honesty, but you broke another one too. You don't trust me to be loyal to you?"

"I do trust you! But what am I supposed to make of this, Mark?" Your eyes stung.

Mark's cold gaze softened. "I have never had the thought of ever cheating on you and would never. I'm sorry that I was distant and made you feel that I wasn't being truthful."

"I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about it until now..."

"You have nothing to be sorry about. I've been waiting for forever just to get back home to you." You felt his warm hands caress your waist. "Can I please kiss my beautiful girlfriend now?"

"Yes." You breathed.

Mark snaked his hands further around your waist, and with a passionate firmness, pursed his lips between yours. You felt your body tingle with warmth and your heart beating heavily against your boyfriend's chest. A groan left Mark's lips as he left yours.

"Hey..." Mark's voice turned raspy as he eyed your body. "You deserve my honesty; The real reason I have been distant is because I was putting a lot of energy into planning something really important."

"Planning something...?" Your head cocked to one side. "For your album?"

"No, for you."

"For me..?"

Mark's lips cut your question short and derailed your train of thought.

"It's a surprise for later." You could feel a smirk developing on your boyfriend's soft lips. "Let me enjoy the surprise you have for me first."

Mark gazed over at the romantic display you made in the living room.

"Do you like it? I hope I didn't go overboard..."

"It's perfect." Mark looked into your eyes with the utmost sincerity. "And you even got me my favorite gummy bears? It's everything I could have wanted. And you being here with me makes it all better."

Mark infused passion into every aspect of his life, and his way with words was no exception. Surprisingly, conveying his feelings verbally wasn't always his forte in our relationship. However, he consciously broke free from the habit of murmuring, trailing off, and avoiding eye contact. Despite not being the most talkative when we initially met, the incomprehensible extent to which Mark went out of his way to express how much I meant to him was truly remarkable.

"I'm so glad you're home." You wrapped your arms around your boyfriend's torso and pulled him close.

"Me too." You felt a light peck on your forehead. "Why don't we get this night started?"

~

It was 2:45 am when the credits started to roll on the third horror movie that Mark insisted that you both watch. Unfortunately, he had been too invested to realize that you had fallen asleep since movie number two. You found the most heavenly spot on his chest to rest your head, and with his right arm snuggled gently around your torso and his left hand resting on your thigh, it was a guaranteed recipe for a great night's rest.

"The gore in that was something else-" Mark cut himself off when his eyes came to gaze on your sleeping figure.

Your face was adorably smushed up to Mark's chest, letting out soft breaths as you rested. All four of your limbs found themselves wrapped around his slim body, trapping him in your sloth-like embrace. Mark's eyes traveled and the bottom hem of your dress found itself dangerously hiked up to expose your smooth thighs.

Mark rubbed his hand against your thigh. "Wake up, babe."

You blinked your eyes awake and gazed upon the tired eyes of your boyfriend. "Oh shit, did I fall asleep?"

"Definitely. And I think you were snoring a bit, too." He joked.

"Oh stop." You rubbed your eyes to get a better view of the clock. "Oh shit, it's late..."

Mark's voice became hushed. "Maybe we should...continue this celebration upstairs?"

"You're ready for bed?"

"I am. But not necessarily sleep."

You smirked, picking up on his hint. "Oh, I see..."

Without saying another word, you took Mark's hand and guided him up the stairs, where you were greeted by the romantic glow of the moon.

"Oh..."

"You like it, right? I got rose petals, the candles are all lit..." You gestured towards the bathroom.

Mark pulled your hand back towards his body and planted a firm, hungry kiss on your lips.

"You are so sweet. This is amazing..." His warm hands caressed your cheeks. "How do I deserve someone as perfect as you?"

You could feel the heat of his breath on your lips. He was close, too close. The temptation to press your mouth to his was too much to handle. You could almost taste the mint of his toothpaste.

"I know I've been a little distant for these past few months." Mark started. "It's just... I've had a lot on my mind. There's something I've been meaning to talk to you about, but I didn't want to rush things."

"Yeah?"

"But now, I can't hold back." He cupped your cheek and brushed his thumb against it. You felt his gaze bore into yours, and he seemed to study every inch of your face.

"What is it, baby?" You pressed.

"I'm so in love with you. I love you so much that it hurts. I love how passionate you are, I love how you make me feel when we're together, and I love that you've been patient with me during this whole process. You're my rock. You make me want to be a better person. I want to be worthy of you."

"Mark, you already are." You gently held the sides of his face. "Don't say that. You are good enough, Mark. You have such a kind heart and a big soul. You're the most loving and caring person I know. Just don't get too caught up in your music, and start overworking yourself. You're not gonna find me there."

Mark let out a soft chuckle in response.

"You always know what to say," Mark breathed. "I need to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"I know that I was gone for a while, and I want to make it up to you. So, how would you feel about me taking you on a trip?"

"A trip?" You shot him a confused look. "Where would we go?"

"Oh, don't worry about that." Mark kissed the tip of your nose. "I'll take care of everything. Just be ready to leave for this weekend."

"Three days??" You giggled. "You really just planned a whole trip, huh?"

"Anything for you."

As Mark leaned in to kiss you again, you couldn't help but notice his scent. He smelled like the airport and the plane and everything else that was not his normal aroma.

"Speaking of jet setting, you smell weird," you chuckled.

"What do you mean?" he laughed back.

"I'm not sure, but you just smell different."

"Well, I should take a shower then," he suggested. "And maybe you can join me."

"Okay, but don't try any funny business." You smirked.

"What?" He feigned innocence.

"You heard me," you replied, wagging your finger at him.

"Well, I guess we'll just have to wait and see," he said, pulling you close.

"Wait and see, huh?" you repeated.

"Yeah, just wait and see."

You rolled your eyes and pulled away from him, making your way toward the bathroom. As you walked into the bathroom, you could hear Mark following closely behind. You pulled him toward the bathroom and turned on the shower, the sound of the water filling the small room. The sound of unzipping made your head turn to Mark, who was already undressing. You watched on in perverted wonderment at how his abdominal muscles flexed under his perfect skin as he moved to remove his underwear. He glanced over his broad, muscular shoulders, smirking while keeping eye contact as he bent down. You admired how his hair grew poofy from the steam beginning to form around him.

"Enjoying the view?" Mark's husky voice startled you, causing your eyes to snap to his face.

"Shut up," you said as you joined him, sliding the flimsy slip of material you wore onto the floor.

Mark's eyes burned with need as his gaze traveled up your legs, slowly drinking in the image before him.

"Damn..." he breathed as he raked his teeth across his bottom lip, his dark eyes meeting yours.

You smiled coyly at him as you stepped into the shower, closing the glass door behind you. Mark's eyes never left yours as he joined you in the warm spray of the water.

"Mmm," he hummed as he cupped your cheek and brought his lips to yours.

The kiss was soft and sweet at first but quickly turned passionate and needy. You ran your fingers through his damp curls as he pressed his hips into yours, his hardening length brushing against your stomach. His hands were everywhere, exploring every inch of your bare flesh as the water cascaded around you. You moaned softly as his lips found your pulse point, sucking the sensitive skin into his mouth.

"I love the sounds you make," he growled as he gently nipped the delicate skin.

"Hey, don't forget that you have to take a shower, stinky." You chuckled.

Mark grinned and rolled his eyes, grabbing the bottle of shampoo that rested next to the tap.

"Okay, okay."

You watched in anticipation as he squirted some of the soap into his hand, before applying it to his hair. His eyes stayed fixated on yours, which flickered down briefly to take in his naked, glistening body. You couldn't help but admire his perfection, even when doing the most mundane task. How his pectorals flexed with every movement, as he brushed and lathered the soapy bubbles throughout his coils of dark brown hair. How his veins tightened from his arms to his hands, and how each drop of water seemingly dripped at a pace slow enough for you to memorize. Your gaze traced down from his chest to his abs, and even further down past the borderline of pubic hair where-

"Babe."

"Sorry, what?" Your eyes shifted back to his face.

"Were you paying attention?" Mark smugly raised an eyebrow.

"I was definitely paying attention..." You trailed off.

"So what was I saying?"

"You were saying, that I was being the best girlfriend ever!"

"Mm-hm."

"By making us dinner tonight."

"Mm-hm."

"And how your favorite gummy bears are an ample reward for me having to put up with you-"

"Alright," Mark chuckled as he laid his index finger on the seam of your lips. "Point made. You got me."

"Duh." You nipped at his knuckle. "You're so easy. What did you say, anyway?"

"Something..." Mark teased as he dunked his head back under the water, washing the remaining shampoo down his torso. "About how much I really, really, missed touching you. All of you."

You snorted. "You mean our little quickie at LAX before you left didn't cut it?"

"Is that what you call what happened at LAX?" He asked, pulling you close and pressing his arousal against you.

"Yes," you giggled. "Because that is exactly what we did. You were the one trying to miss your flight."

"I couldn't help it." He groaned. "It was just so hot."

"Oh shut up." You laughed.

You grabbed the bottle of body wash, poured some on your towel, and rubbed the soap into the cloth.

"Are you gonna help me or what?" You asked playfully.

"What do you think?" He replied, grabbing the other end of the towel and helping you rub the wet cloth along your body.

Your breath hitched as his hand moved from your ribs down to your hips and your mouth dropped open when you felt his fingertips graze your behind. You groaned loudly as Mark continued to caress your ass, his other hand sliding around your waist and pulling you into his embrace. You shuddered as he pressed his lips against your neck, murmuring words of love and encouragement in between every kiss.

"Why didn't you come with me on tour, again?" Mark asked as he continued massaging your skin.

"We talked about this, Mark," you replied, lightly rolling your eyes. "I wanted to be here and continue working. And I don't think I'm cut out for road life."

"But I wanted you there..." he pouted, making your heart stop. "I missed you like crazy."

"I missed you, too..." You turned to face him, seeing him still with an upset frown. You reached for his hands and gently ran your thumb over his knuckles.

"But I don't think I can spend another tour without my Markie-Poo," you admitted with a soft smile.

You looked up to see your boyfriend with the brightest grin you've seen him with in a long while. Mark immediately took the back of your head and pulled your face towards his in a loving embrace, getting soap all over his arms and torso...

"So you're telling me that the next tour I have, you're coming with me?"

" I promise."

"I could get used to having you near me every day," Mark whispered into your ear, his low voice sending shivers down your spine.

"I'd hope so," You replied. "It would be pretty confusing to accommodate another presence in our bed, otherwise."

You could see a pout starting to form on your boyfriend's lips. You loved how Mark could make a face of indifference switch from a stone-cold wall into a begging, adorable, child. The pout quickly melted away, however, and you were only able to appreciate its short existence for a split second. His eyes shifted from your own to your neck, his pale and slender fingertips gliding gently against your exposed collarbone.

"Hey..." You whispered into his ear. "What are you thinking about?"

Mark didn't speak. Only paused for a moment, as if contemplating what he wanted to say, but only getting lost in your beauty. Your breath hitched. His eyes were focused on yours as he inched closer to you. He never broke your stare until his hand suddenly reached up and he placed it ever so carefully against your cheek, causing you to inhale deeply. His eyes flickered over your face, resting for a brief moment at your lips, then back up to meet yours once again. His hand traveled from your cheek and made its way down to your chin, tilting your head up slightly. His lips met yours, softly and gently. He didn't push or rush. He seemed to savor the moment, pulling away just enough to let out a small whimper.

"Did you just moan?" He asked.

"Mmmm, maybe," you replied teasingly.

"If we weren't in the shower right now..." he started.

"Then what would we be doing, Mark?" You asked, grinning at him.

"Then," he said, his low voice rumbling as his hand wrapped around your waist, gently moving his face close to yours. "I would be taking you against the glass."

Mark kissed your forehead tenderly and continued his gentle ministrations against your skin.

"We would start slow," he began. "My hands would travel all over you, starting at your hips. I'd go over them over and over until I could feel you shake."

You bit your lip as Mark's movements matched his words. You could feel your cheeks warm from the way he talked. He had never talked to you this way. Never with the confidence and sultry tone of voice. Mark was normally a gentle, passionate, yet quiet lover.

But this was different. It was sexy. You loved it.

A moan escaped from your lips, unable to suppress the shiver that ran throughout your entire body. The mere thought of having him inside you caused your muscles to twitch and spasm. Mark chuckled lightly as he leaned into you, his hands still exploring your curves. You loved it when he held you. His touch felt so warm and comforting. It made you feel safe and protected, but at the same time, you loved how strong his arms felt against your frame. He felt so large compared to your small size and it gave you the most pleasant butterflies.

"After that I would pick you up, your legs around my waist," he said softly, pulling back a bit to stare into your eyes. "And then, I'd drive you insane..."

He emphasized each word as if he were whispering them into your ear, and his words left you breathless and speechless. Mark's voice had a way of making you feel things you've never felt before.

"Sounds like you really want to have shower sex," you said with a slight giggle.

He kissed you passionately as his hands glided back to your ass once again, gripping you firmly as he slowly lifted you in the air. You wrapped your arms around his slender neck, and your legs around his waist. As your curves pressed against him, you could feel his excitement, causing your eyes to widen slightly. You hadn't even touched him yet, and he was extremely excited for you.

Mark placed one hand against the shower wall for support and you looked into his beautiful brown orbs once more.

"Have you been wanting me, like I have been needing you?" He asked in a low and husky voice that sent shivers through your body. You answered him by pressing your lips against his and kissing him passionately. After a few seconds, Mark moved his kisses across your neck and down to your collarbone. He sucked on it lightly, causing you to gasp as your nails dug into his shoulders. He let out a small groan, and you couldn't help but laugh slightly. The man was adorable.

For five agonizing minutes, he tortured you with his mouth, and slowly lifted you higher. Your heart started beating so fast, causing a mixture of nervousness and excitement that blended perfectly.

"Relax babe," Mark cooed.

You took a deep breath, the smile not leaving your face, and nodded at him.

Mark entered your slit slowly, his length engulfing your walls slowly. You sucked in a breath and shut your eyes tight, letting yourself enjoy this feeling of being filled so completely by your boyfriend. He went deep, his entire length inside you now. He let himself stay there for a second, giving you time to get used to this new feeling. Then he pulled out a few inches before sliding back into you. He continued this process, slowly getting a rhythm, his thrusts growing in power. You moaned each time his length penetrated you.

"Yes..." you breathed and heard Mark moan in response.

He increased his pace even more, driving his length into you and then withdrawing completely with each thrust. Soon, the sounds of water splashing off your wet skin filled the room. Mark became a mess of grunts and pants every time he penetrated you, audibly teasing you toward your climax.

"Babe, you feel so-" A deep moan escaped your boyfriend's parted lips.

His breath was hot on your neck as he worked you towards your release, and it felt like electricity every time his skin touched yours. You had forgotten where you were, who you were, and what was going on around you, it was only you and Mark.

"Mark..." you moaned.

You couldn't hold off your orgasm any longer as waves of pleasure washed over your body. He continued his ministrations as you rode your high, and you watched him as you came down. You looked in awe at this beautiful specimen of a man standing before you as he held you in his arms. He just smiled at you and placed a kiss on your forehead.

Then he exhaled and put you down, slumping against the cold tile wall. His wet hair dangled over his blushed face. You smiled and placed a hand against his cheek, stroking it gently as you gave him another kiss, he kissed you in return, and the soft brush of his lips lingered as you pulled away.

"I love you," he said, his gaze fixed on yours.

"I love you, too."

You say "You took the energy out of me."

Mark smiled and leaned back against the wall. "I guess you could say that," he smirked, raising an eyebrow. "Do you think you'll be able to get to the bedroom? Or do you need me to carry you?"

You slowly stood up, ceasing the sound of running water with your index finger. "Carry me, please!" You pouted and raised your arms.

Mark chuckled as he opened the shower door to retrieve your towels.

"Alright, alright, my queen," Mark threw your wet towel on your head, muffling your laugh. "I'll carry you to the bed."

You pushed the towel off of your face as Mark slipped his arms underneath your wet body and scooped you up into his arms.

"Mmm, you smell much better," you murmured as you nuzzled against his neck. Mark snorted and kissed the top of your head.

You were smitten by his scent and the way he handled you with such ease. He gently laid you on your bed, sinking in on top of you, like you had been daydreaming of for months.

"I've missed this," he whispered, "missed touching you, missed watching you sleep..." He brushed a strand of hair away from your face and gazed down at you like you were the only person in the world.

"I missed waking up next to you, seeing your face in the mornings, and hearing your voice at night."

He brought his lips to yours, softly and sweetly like he was afraid you would break. His lips tasted like the memories of stolen kisses in dark corners and glances behind closed doors. The more you tasted his lips, the more you craved, and you pressed into him, desperate for more.

"Baby, I've missed you so much," he mumbled against your lips, "and you don't understand how crazy it's been."

"No kidding," you replied, returning his kiss with equal vigor.

"Everywhere I went, fans were throwing themselves at me. All I could think about was you. All I'm ever gonna want is you."

Your heart skipped a beat at the confession. You pulled away to smile at him, taking in his beautiful face. It wasn't just his looks that captivated you; it was his mind and his heart. He was pure goodness through and through, and you knew you were the luckiest person in the world.

"And all I ever want is you," you replied. Mark cupped your face and stared into your eyes, his deep brown eyes pooling with emotion. "You okay, babe?"

"It's nothing...I just- I love you," he said, his voice cracking slightly, "so much."

You kissed him fiercely, overcome with emotion. "I love you a shit ton too."

Mark laughed, the corner of his eyes crinkling. "Well, you better. You won't be able to get rid of me that easily."

"Good."

Mark smirked and moved his head down, trailing kisses across your stomach and past your navel.

"What are you doing down there? Aren't you tired?"

Mark looked up, his eyes twinkling mischievously.

"It would be a waste not to take advantage of the candles and rose petals, don't you think?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

~

To Be Continued.

[cosmiclatte28]

POOL (YUTA X READER)

Hello!! I'm finally back with a story! I hope it's not like a beginner story but oh well i tried!

Tw : surrounded by males. Pool game, touching without consent

Net @superm-net @multifandomnet tagging @neopalette

Here we go!! Thanks for reading hope this is enjoyable

Friday night, the awaited day has finally come! All the fatigue of the week is expected to be drowned in lots of fun games and by sharing laughter. You sit nicely on one of the corner of the common room, casually playing with your mobile phone while you wait for your best friend, Mark, rushed back to his room because he forgot his wallet. You tap your heeled boots to the rhythm of a song playing in your earpods and hum along to the lyrics. 

As you throw your eyes to the big window panel that shows you the picturesque scenery of purple sky, your smile brightens when you hear Mark's footsteps approaching you. 

"Come on, the boys are already waiting! We'll gather at Johnny's dorm as he has the most game options in the common room there." Mark explains as both of you start taking steps down through the stairs.

"Well, blame the students here for stealing the pool ball." You giggle when you remember checking the pool table with Mark earlier and found out that it was empty. 

"Right, well we can always hit the club to play but I guess Johnny's dorm has complete balls there." Mark gently opens the door for you and soon after the two of you are already in front of Johnny's dorm. 

You can see the guys gathered near the pool table and at the table soccer place.  You shrug your shoulder when Mark noticed there's no other girl.

"You wanna bring your friends?" Mark offers after greeting Johnny. 

You shake your head "I'm good. Just Johnny, introduce me to these hot people." You wink and both Johnny and Mark, who knew you by heart, just nod their heads.

There are not many boys, actually the lobby is empty and there's only Johnny, you, Mark and three other guys you never met before. 

Mark just greets them but from the vibes,you know he also just knew these guys. 

Johnny claps and catches the attentions of the boys who were chatting. 

"Guys, meet (y/n) and (y/n) meet Jaehyun, Taeyong, and Yuta." The Chicago man points to the guy with a dimple, a guy with a sharp jaw and super small face. He looks so godly, and lastly to a guy who smiles so sweetly but in a mere of second after shaking your hand can give you a super sinful smirk. 

You blink one time after shaking all of their hands, whoah did you really just hit the jackpot and you're standing in front of three deadly handsome people. 

"So, Johnny said we could play pool because I guess everyone knows how to." Mark moves to take the sticks and hands it down to the people.

"I haven't played lately, I used to play for fun three years ago." You rub your neck, feeling shy that you're surrounded by tall people.

Jaehyun smiles, "You sure? What if suddenly you're super good?" 

The boys burst into a laughter "Nah, she looks amateur." Johnny teases you and you are totally fine with it. 

You shrug your shoulder "We'll see, so how do we play?" 

Taeyong smartly suggests making a team of two and just have four of us play first and the winner can go up against the best, in this case Jaehyun and Johnny. 

"I'll play with (y/n)!" Yuta calmly assign the team and everyone else agrees. You don't mind playing with anyone because you don't want to make yourself too confident too and be embarrassed if you lose.

Yuta made a nice opening shot, breaking the balls to different direction. Everyone cheers when Mark already pockets his first solid color. 

"We're doing stripes now (y/n), don't be nervous." Yuta helps you aim for a ball. You can feel your stiff playing, well there's no warm up so you're just trying your best and at least your hits are accurate.

Yuta claps when you pocket two balls inside "Whoah you're not bad." He high fives you and your heart grows warmer. Well it's either your happiness of playing the game well or his sweet smile. 

Taeyong is the hidden ace card, on his turn he almost finishes pocketing his solids but one missed shot and Yuta is taking over the table now. 

Despite Yuta's precise shots, your team still has two more balls because you did some mistakes earlier and that aided the other team.

Johnny and Jaehyun are just enjoying it, keeping calm and helping the four of you play. 

"(Y/N), try this." Johnny shows you a steadier way of placing your fingers to give friction on the stick. 

"I am not used to it, I'll stick to mine." You tried to aim but feel something's off with your hand. 

Yuta chuckles and stands next to you "Go like this, and excuse me," He shows you his hand position and after you copy it, he suddenly holds your hand and help you aim. His bigger frame cages your shorter body and he helps you move the stick so you get the feeling.

Your heart skip a beat and you can feel your cheeks go red. No one made a comment as they are all busy watching the ball and trying to calculate the game. 

Yuta smirks when he sees your red face, he lets go off you and steps back. "Got it? Now do that it will make your shot 90% accurate." 

You focus on what he taught and sure enough put two more balls inside. 

But on the next attempt, you missed and that means it's Mark's turn to play.

"Oh dude we only need to pocket 8!" Mark was so happy and Taeyong just remains calm.

"Okay  call the pocket Mark or it's not counted." Jaehyun calmly examines the table. 

Mark thinks for a while and finally goes with the upper right corner. Everyone holds their breath when Mark made his shot, the ball bounced and rolled and made it into the hole… another hole, not the one he called.

"Fuuuckkkk" mark yelled and taeyong only laughs. 

You are still confused but Yuta is clapping so hard with Johnny "We won by default!!" Yuta explains to you and you laugh "So we're going against Johnny?" 

Johnny just keeps teasing Mark about losing and Mark is still agonizing himself. 

Jaehyun already rearranges the balls and this time, you got the honors to do the first hit. 

"Just hit super hard." Yuta advises you, and as you start to warm up from the first game, your hit makes a nice sound and the balls roll around the tables.

"Sweet, that was nice!" Jaehyun whistles as he realizes there's not much good shot for any of the balls. 

The hot man tries to attempt a short hit. He places the stick behind his back and gracefully tries to hit a solid near the hole, but he missed and you smirk. 

You've learned about the back hit before and you were once good at it. 

It is your turn now and Johnny takes a look on the table "(y/n), do you want to try do the short aim like Jaehyun did? It looks hard but it's not." 

Yuta was trying to find another possibility but looks like doing what Johnny said is the best option.

"But she might not have the height to do it." Mark blurts a comment and Yuta was ready to throw punches. You, however, only quietly bring yourself up the table. You sit on the edge and place the stick behind your back. 

"Ohh looking nice girl," Johnny comments on your posture and your aiming direction.

You move your right hand and give a very nice strong spot on hit on the stripe.

"Woah" Jaehyun and Yuta both scream and clap. You just smile "Guess I still have it." 

Johnny gives you a thumbs up and Mark is left speechless. The rest of the game happens quite fast since Johnny keeps pocketing all solids and Yuta backs you up a lot leaving you with two stripes but Jaehyun is already trying to pocket the last 8 ball.

"Come on we got this (y/n)!" Yuta cheers you up when Jaehyun missed the shot. 

You try to not feel nervous and gather your focus.

One clean shot, and the boys all have their jaws opened.

"Wait what? She did that?!" They were surprised when you made one clean shot and now you're boldly striding across the table  aiming for your last stripe.

"Take it easy." Yuta whispers and hints you which side of the ball you should hit. 

You aid his words and true enough you pocket the last stripe.

Now everyone has their eyes on you. "The last 8 ball! If you pocket this and call the right pocket, we win.. but once you miss its their win!" Mark tries to make you worked up but that makes you super nervous instead.

"Yuta do you want to do it?" You plead but he shakes his head "No, it's your turn. You should do it. It's okay to miss. It's only a game." He squeezes your shoulder and bends to match your height 

"Go hit that side and call the middle left pocket. I know you will win it." He pats your shoulder and leaves you a space. 

You take a deep breath, Johnny is watching you from the aimed hole. He also looks nervous and you did your shot. 

"Yayyyy!!!!" Jaehyun screams when you missed by a hair on the aimed hole. Johnny is already screaming around with Jaehyun too  laughing at how they win because you missed the ball.

You grin and Yuta pulls you into a hug "Great job girl! That was a nice game!" He ruffles your hair.

You freeze in his hug and pull back "What? You're okay with me making us lose?" 

You almost say sorry for messing it up, but Yuta already shuts you up. "Nope. It's a game and I'm having fun! i don't need to win, i just love spending my Friday like this!" He pinches your cheek and you blush. 

"We can play more if you want," Jaehyun already has the table ready. 

You glance to Yuta and after sending a quiet conversation with your eyes you click your tongue 

"Let Mark and Taeyong play, the winner play against us." You hand the sticks over and pull Yuta away to the side. 

"While they play, why don't we get something to eat? i haven't eaten dinner." You cock your head to the side.

Yuta gives his warm smile and touches your cheek "Okay cutie, let's do that. Look at you hitting on me smooth like butter.

You wink and Yuta only snickers "We'll see who is the better flirt-er then!"

End

[toomanyfandoms02]

Evidence // Spencer Reid x Reader

HEY guess who's back. I'm SO SO SO sorry for the delay. I've been having the most SERIOUS case of writers block and I'm finally pulling myself out of it YAYYYY. So here ya go.

Not a request, but I couldn't resist this prompt!

Summary - Spencer and Reader get locked in the evidence room.

Prompt - “What on earth happened in here?"

Word count - 2.9k

Spencer and I often stayed after together to finish up work. We didn't like to have to wake up so early to make touch ups. So here we were, sitting on the floor in the back of the evidence room. We were sat behind tall filing cabinets, a dim lamp lit beside us.

We were working a case in Arizona involving 3 girls. It was running relatively smooth, the problem was that the police station that we were placed at was in the middle of nowhere. And that was proven by the signal warning on my phone.

*unable to send message.*

Good thing it wasn't anything important.

There were multiple pages sprawled out in front of us, we looked between them all.

"I don't think we will have to stay too long after today." I commented. "It looks like we are working pretty fast this time around."

"I guess we're getting the hang of this " Spencer laughed, writing something down.

*click*

I craned my neck around the cabinets, wondering if someone was coming in the door. Seeing no one, I turned back to him, shrugging my shoulders.

We continued for another hour (and 28 minutes by Spencer's count). I stacked the papers together, shutting them in a folder and tucking it under my arm. I stood from my previous position, stretching my back.

"That's enough sitting on a concrete floor for me." I complained, hunching over and dragging myself to the door. This earned a laugh from Spencer. I reached for the knob, eager to get to the hotel and sleep.

But the knob only jiggled.

And jiggled.

And didn't budge.

"Uh. I think, I think the door is locked." I whispered, turning to Spencer slowly.

"No way." He stated, lightly pushing me out of the way. I listened as he jiggled it, desperately trying to turn the door knob. His head was placed against the glass, hands framing his eyes while he looked out the small doors window. "The lights are all off out there. I think they are on night patrol."

"Well this is thrilling." I laughed, slumping onto the floor. I pulled my phone from my pocket, holding it in the air and attempting to call Emily. The call started, my excitement being crushed by a warning on my phone.

*Your call cannot go through at the moment, we are unable to find a signal.*

Well fine then.

"Do you know how to pick a lock?" He asked.

"If there was anyone that knows how to pick a lock, I thought it would be you."

"Why?" His posture looked stiff and offended.

"You know everything." I deadpanned offering a dumb look. He rolled his eyes at this and sat down across from me. "Do you think we'll die in here?" I asked nonchalantly. Spencer squinted his eyes at me.

"Well statistically, no." And that's all he said.

"Is that all you got?"

"I'm too tired to ramble." He groaned. His head was leaned back on a cabinet. "But I will say that on average night patrols and at around 3:30 to 4 am. So we have quite a few hours to kill." The clock on the wall read 11:17. Yeah, we had some time to kill.

"Alright, we aren't just gonna sit here. We are gonna play games, I can't stand to sit in silence." Spencer sat up slightly, flashing me a confused look.

"Like what?"

"We are going to start with would you rather. I'll start." My head started sorting through all of the would you rather questions I had been asked that I loved and found the perfect one for this genius.

"Would you rather lose the ability to read or the ability to speak." I watched as he opened his mouth to answer then closed it, thinking again. I thought this would be a pretty obvious answer for him.

"I think I would lose the ability to speak. I could do nearly everything the same. I would just have to write my findings down." He sat in thought for a moment. "Would you rather have unlimited international first class tickets or never have to pay for food at restaurants?" I was thoroughly surprised by the question.

"That's a good one! I definitely want to travel, but I do eat a lot... First class tickets. I want to see ancient ruins, can't walk to them." I laughed. We played this game for around 10 more minutes before getting extremely bored of it.

"Alright enough of this." I groaned, coming up with a new idea. "We are gonna play two truths and a lie. Pretty straight forward, I'll start and you try to guess which one is a lie." Spencer nodded and waited. "I broke my leg while falling from a tree when I was 9, I've had a crush on someone on the team, and I once ate nerds candy for a whole week when I was 7 and had to get my stomache pumped." The last one had his eyebrows furrowing. I remained still and emotionless so he couldn't read me as well.

"I completely believe that you ate candy for a week and had to get medical attention as a result." He pointed out oh so graciously. "And you're a total klutz too, so it wouldn't surprise me if you broke your leg. Plus I think I'd know if you ever liked someone on the team. Final answer you've never had a crush on anyone on the team." He looked so smug in the moment, this just got me more pumped to wipe that smile from his face.

"Nope." As expected, his face immediately fell.

"Who did you like!" Spencer's arms were flailing in exasperation.

"I don't have to tell you that." I chuckled. "Now you go." My foot kicked his lightly, egging him on. He gave a glare and moved on reluctantly.

"I'm afraid of the dark, the only reason I drink coffee is because I had a crush on a girl who liked it, and I drank 11 cups of coffee one day and was up for 39 hours straight."

"You definitely drink coffee because you like it and not because of a girl, lie." There was no question about it, that would be a dumb reason to drink something.

"Actually that is why I drink coffee."

Huh?

"The lie is that I was up for 39 hours straight, I was only up for 35."

"Christ Spence!" I shook my head in disapproval. "Tell me about the girl." I could see his cheeks flush in the slightest. ~~Silently wishing that I could make him feel like that~~

"Her name was Josephine and she lived on my street. She and I would play chess together in the park whenever I wasn't studying, and she would bring a cup of coffee every day. Eventually, in my own way to impress her, I started bringing coffee too. And she liked that, but of course we drifted apart because of how fast my life was moving. It's unfortunate." He was staring down at his hands now. "You and her are very similar. I think that's why we've gotten so... close." That comment got me very curious.

"How were we alike? If you don't mind me asking."

"She was kind and funny, never let anyone down. And she was intelligent. Not only in personality either, you have the same color hair and eyes. I bet you guys would have gotten along really well." I could see him making his thinking face, I assume he was looking into past memories.

"That's so sweet." I kicked his foot with a smile, bringing him back to reality. "So, last round until we are playing the dreaded truth or dare ooooOooOooOooo." Spencer laughed and rolled his eyes. "I use to have a cat named Piglet because of how obsessed with Winnie the Pooh I was, my first boyfriends name was Spencer, and I play guitar."

"There is absolutely no way your first boyfriends name was Spencer, it's the 828th most popular name. That would be nearly impossible or a crazy coincidence." His hand gestured were out of this world at this point, completely flabbergasted that I would even try to tell him such a *lie*.

"Wrong again pretty boy, that's true. His name was Spencer Allen Sallow. The only reason I remember his middle name is because I remember his initials being 'SAS'. Are you ready for truth or dare?"

"I guess." He mocked annoyance and threw his head back.

"Ok, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"If you could make one wish, right this second, what would it be?" He stared at me intently for a moment, as if he was looking for the answer in me. He then lightly shook his head, it was so small, but hard to miss considering we were practically having a staring contest.

"I would wish for the door to be unlocked so I could sleep at the hotel." His head nodded.

"Boring, I choose dare." I was now sitting much closer to him, waiting for whatever that beautiful brain could come up with. Spencer looked to the papers on the floor and then back at me, an evil smirk forming on his lips.

"Do a snow angel in our paperwork." My shoulders slumped.

"What if I rip something!" I wouldn't usually whine like this but *geez* I did not want to redo all this.

"Just be careful then." I looked at him with a pleading look. "Oh so you're *boring*." That's what got me.

"**Fine!**" I slowly lowered myself onto the papers, flattening out and looking up to Spencer, he was hovering over me slightly in a criss-crossed position with that evil smirk. His hands gestured me on.

I laid my arms and legs and and moved them, hearing the paper scrape against the floor and giggling. I had to admit, it was fun. And if having fun with Spencer meant I had to redo a few papers.

Then so be it.

I sat up after Spencer told me I'm done through fits of laughter, holding his stomache and nearly toppled flat on the floor. I looked around happily to see most papers were only crinkled, not ripped. I'll just have to flatten them out tomorrow.

"Okay asshat, truth or dare." He tapped his chin, looking daring for once.

"Dare." Perfect.

"Serenade me." I crossed my arms over my chest as I watched his face fall.

"With just my voice?"

"Oh no no, I have an instrument, the bag I carry with us on cases is like a never ending bag." I reached into the giant bag and pulled out a ukelele case, but not an *ordinary* uke case, a *mini* uke case. "Can you play ukelele?" I pulled it from the case, handing it over to him.

"No, but I may be able to pick it up."

"So you will actually serenade me!?" I got my hands ready to clap.

"Sure, why not." I clapped infinitely fast, watching him pluck at the strings a bit and lean back into the cabinets. Then he started on a beat, one that I recognized.

"Put your head on my shoulder, hold me in your arms, baby. Squeeze me oh so tight. Show me that you love me too." I listened to him through the whole song, knowing full well that as soon as he was strumming that ukelele I was already done for.

"How did I do?" He strummed the last chord and look up at me with a smile.

Oh how I wanted to tell him that he serenaded me to the sun and back.

"That was amazing! You learned that om the spot?"

"Yeah, like piano. It's basically just math and note remembrance." He shrugged, setting it back in my case. "Truth or dare."

"Truth."

"What's the first thing on your bucket list and your biggest secret?"

"You can't ask two questions, that's cheating!" I laughed.

"You technically never specified that so, answer."

This little shit.

"Fine. The first thing on my bucket list has been the same since I was an 8th grader, which is to fall in love. And I know that's cliche but I'm sticking to it." I didn't want to tell him my biggest secret. Truth be told I had a pretty normal life, so my biggest secret was my attraction to him. After telling my mom about it she told me workplace romances were dangerous and wrong, so I tried so hard to get over it. But it's not going away, it's doing anything but that.

"Come on y/n, I'm not going to judge you for your secret."

Yeah uh huh, sure.

"It's embarrassing, and I would prefer not to tell you in a locked room so I can immediately escape after I tell you. So can I just tell you when the door gets unlocked?"

"It can't be that bad."

"It is."

"Please Y/n!"

"I like you!" His mouth shut quickly, tilting his head like a confused puppy. Now that I had given out my biggest secret, I felt a little... powerful. I crossed my arms firmly over my chest, maintaining eye contact, my heart pounding out of my chest. He wanted the truth and he got it, I hope he's happy to be stuck with me in this room for another hour and a half.

"Really?" Was all he could say.

"No. I just said that I could have awkward tension swirling around the room for the next hour, I love doing that." I replied in the most monotone voice I could muster. A very faint smile was appearing on Spencer's face, making me a little nervous. He quirked one eyebrow.

"Are you sure it's not sexual tension?"

What?

My eyebrows raised at the question. Was he... flirting with me? I didn't know he knew how to do that, let alone so *well*. He began speaking again.

"Truth or dare?"

"It's my turn to ask you."

"Truth. Or. Dare." Who knew Mr. Sweatervest could seem so intimidating.

"Dare."

"I dare you to act on your biggest secret." Is this some weird way to make me kiss him, because it's working. If we aren't on the same page, this is about to get Mega embarrassing, but I don't think this could get any weirder. I crawled forward, placing myself on his lap and staring into his eyes. I've never seen him smile so big.

"Are you sure about this?"

"Actually no, this is awful you should really stop." He deadpanned, lightly placing his hands on my hips.

"One, since when do you use sarcasm. And two, I hate you." I giggled, pulling his face to mine. One of his hands fled to my cheek, rubbing his thumb across it. He pressed further into the kiss, all while pulling me impossibly closer.

Is this real?

I pulled one hand away from his face, putting it on the skin of my thigh and pinching myself.

"Ouch shit!"

And apperantly I don't know my own strength.

"Are you okay?" Spencer's face was a wave of concern, scanning over my face quickly to make sure he didn't do something wrong.

"Yeah I was just, pinching myself to make sure this was real." I lifted my hand to his shoulder, resting it there.

"Why? Is this like a lot of your dreams?" He winking obviously at me as I slapped his chest.

"Please stop." I whined, pulling myself off of his lap. "I'm very tired and we still have an hour left, are you up for a cat nap?" I pulled a blanket from my bag. "We can use this as a pillow, it's already pretty hot in here."

"Definitely." I made it into a pillow, giving him enough room. He slung his arm around me, burying his head in the crook of my neck. "Thank you for telling me. And for the record, I wouldn't want to be locked in a room with anyone else." And with many papers scattered messily around us, we fell asleep.

-

I shot up, hearing voices I knew all too well.

"What the hell is happening, since when it pretty boy a playboy."

"Finally! Now y/n can stop silently pining and telling me about it."

"I knew those two had chemistry."

I blinked slowly, trying to release the sleep from my eyes. Spencer's sleepy arm was still wrapped around my waist, unmoving. Once my eyes adjusted I was met with the staring eyes of Derek, Garcia and Emily. Then there was Hotch, just entering the room.

“What on earth happened in here?"

"We got locked in here and played some innocent party games." I explained gesturing to the messy papers. "Spencer dared me to make a snow angel in our files." I smiled sheepishly. Spencer was now stirring awake, sitting up and looking at our teammates. Derek held out his hand for a fist bump and Spencer highfived it weakly.

"Told you you would rope her in." He chuckled. I rolled my eyes at the comment and stood up.

"Let's finish up this case. We've only had 1 hour of sleep and I want this day to be over with already. Save the comments for when I'm asleep on the jet." And with that we were off.

But let's not ignore that Spencer and I's hands were clasped beneath every table we sat at that day, it's not to be ignored.

And I won't be forgetting that day any time soon.

[deobienthusiast]

meet my guard cat

• pairing: lee juyeon (the boyz) x reader

• word count: 1,833 words

• genre: fluff

• warnings: mentions of not feeling safe, angry juyeon, a few curse words

• notes: the amount of titles i came up with for this, it was hard to pick one (none of them were good tbh😅) also i reached 400 followers YAYYYY! Thank you so so much for that🤍🤍

• requested: yes | no by anon

“Are you sure this is how you want to spend your birthday? Just walking around the mall?” You heard your boyfriend, Juyeon, say behind.

His arm was being strongly held (and pulled out of its socket) in your grip as you pulled him around the large building. He had managed to put in some time off from work to spend time with you for your birthday, and when you told him you wanted just a lowkey day, going to the mall wasn't on his mind.

You turned to look at Juyeon as he stared down at you. his cat-like eyes glistened under the bright, fluorescent lights as he raised an eyebrow at you.

“Since when are you turning down the mall? Aren't you the one that is obsessed with the food court?” You teased him.

Juyeon’s eyebrow fell as he let out a laugh. “Touché.”

You stood on your tiptoes to peck his cheek as you smiled. “I promise, a shopping spree is the way I want to spend my birthday. Okay?”

He let out a sigh before nodding and breathing out an ‘okay’ of his own. This time you pecked his lips as you started pulling his arm to drag him through the mall again. Juyeon chuckled as he brought his free hand to grab his shoulder, trying to run out the tension that was being brought to the joint.

“I think I��m going to need a visit to an orthopedic surgeon when we get finished.” Juyeon said under his breath, just loud enough for you to hear.

You stopped in front of a store, making the boy bump into you, as you sheepishly turned to him, giving him a smile as you dropped his hand.

“Sorry,” You said shyly.

He pecked your forehead. “It’s okay.”

This time, Juyeon grabbed your hand and walked you both at a comfortable pace into a department store. You let go of his hand as you ran off into the store in a different direction than your boyfriend. He didn’t even have time to process you letting go of his hand as he turned to ask you something and you were gone. Juyeon noticed you on the other side of the store, looking at different pairs of jeans before his eyebrows furrowed. A guy he was certain that neither of you knew had walked up to you.

“Can I help you with something?” The guy asked, making you jump.

You brought a hand to your chest as you smiled slightly. “Oh, you scared me. Um, I think I’m fine. Thank you, though.”

The worker watched you momentarily as his eyes raked up and down your body. You suddenly felt uncomfortable as you excused yourself, quickly heading to a new aisle. Once you were away from the worker, you looked at the shirts hanging up on the racks. You found one that you particularly liked that would look good on Juyeon as you pulled it off the rack.

“You know, that shirt wouldn’t fit you.” You heard from behind you.

Turning around, you clutched the shirt closer to you as you spoke.

“Obviously. It’s not for me.” You told the worker as you went back to looking at the different shirts.

He took a step closer to you. “Buying it for a friend?”

“Try boyfriend,” Juyeon said as he joined you by your side.

The worker took a step back as he took in Juyeon’s large stature. Your boyfriend definitely had a couple of inches on the guy. Juyeon pulled you into him as the guy smiled.

“Nice to meet you,” He barely spared a glance at Juyeon as he spoke to you again. “Between you and I, I’d never leave someone as good looking as you in a store by yourself. Anybody can scoop you up and take you away. Be careful about that.”

He winked at you, before throwing a smirk towards Juyeon. Walking away from the two of you, Juyeon pulled the shirt out of your hands and pulled you out of the store.

He held onto your hand tightly as you both walked towards the food court. Juyeon stayed mostly silently, this time keeping a close eye on the people around the two of you.

“Juyeon-ie, just relax.” You told him, rubbing his arm.

You felt the stiffness of his arm disappear beneath your fingertips as he looked down at you.

“I’m sorry. He was just worrying me.” Juyeon said softly.

You got on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek as he tilted his head slightly, pushing his nose against yours. “Thank goodness I have you right?”

Juyeon nodded with a chuckle as he pulled you guys into line at an ice cream shop. Pulling you in front of him and wrapping his arms around you, Juyeon let you pick whatever you wanted from the menu as he just opted for a plain double vanilla scoop in a waffle cone. You both chose a table that was towards the back of the food court just so you could people watch.

“Good birthday so far?” Juyeon asked as he watched you stick a mouthful of sprinkled covered ice cream into your mouth.

You nodded, cheeks full as he laughed. “I told you I didn’t want to do anything else. Just shop and spend time with my person.”

Juyeon smiled widely as he looked around the food court. The different people walking around, the elderly couple bickering over what place to order food from, the teenagers who were acting like idiots and disturbing the neighboring families, and even the same worker from earlier.

“What is this guy’s deal?” Juyeon said, catching you off guard.

You scrunched up your nose in confusion as he stared straight ahead, almost as if he was staring into your soul. He wasn’t looking at you though, rather he was looking past you. Craning your neck around to follow his gaze, you noticed who he was talking about.

A sigh left your mouth as you looked at your boyfriend, who’s cat-like eyes had narrowed as he shot daggers at the worker. You finished off your ice cream as you grabbed Juyeon’s hand and pulled him up from his seat.

“Hey, look at me,” You said, cupping his face in your hands so he’d look at you.

Juyeon’s brown orbs traveled around your face before staring into your eyes.

You pecked his lips, making his cheeks turn a light shade of pink. “Don’t let him ruin this day. I’m having a great time, shopping, eating ice cream, and spending time with my favorite boy. Okay?”

His eyes watched you momentarily, drifting up to where the worker was still standing before nodding. You smiled as you pulled him away to another store. This time to a store that both you and Juyeon could both shop at. Juyeon decided to stay close this time as he helped you pick out some outfits that he thought would look good on you.

He ventured off just slightly, leaving you to look at a wall of shoes.

“I definitely need some new shoes.” You said to yourself as you ran your fingers along the different shoes.

When you found a pair you liked, you pulled them off the rack before feeling a presence behind you.

“Find something you like?” You asked, as you turned around, expecting to come face to face with your boyfriend.

“I absolutely did.” Said the worker from earlier.

“So it’s your birthday, huh?” He asked you.

You swallowed back the lump in your throat as you looked around the store for Juyeon.

The guy took a step closer as you took one back, running out of room as you were near a corner. “Happy Birthday.”

He looked you up and down, making you feel insanely uncomfortable considering he was practically undressing you with his eyes.

“It’s kind of cheap of your boyfriend to bring you to a mall, don’t you think? If you were mine,” He paused backing you into the corner. “You would be getting wined, dined, and pampered. All day, everyday.”

You noticed Juyeon quickly coming up behind the guy as you smirked. “I chose to come here, because I’m not a materialistic person.”

The guy gave you a confused look as he immediately let out a yelp, causing people to look over at your side of the store. Juyeon had a firm grip on the back of the guy’s neck as he pushed him against the wall rack of shoes. Some fell from the rack due to the force as Juyeon held him there. The guy let out a cry of pain as you quickly moved from the corner.

“I’m so over you bothering people. You’re like a dog with bone. Why can’t you just leave us alone?” Juyeon said as you finally got him to let go of the worker.

He pushed you behind him as he kept you out of harm's way. The worker turned towards the two of you as Juyeon stood his ground.

He scoffed at the sight. “So you don’t like material things, and judging by your boyfriend, you don’t like dogs. So what the hell do you like then, you prude?”

“Cats.” You said as Juyeon punched the worker.

A crowd had gathered as you managed to pull your seething boyfriend out of the store. You dragged him out of the mall as he continued to mutter to himself about how much he hated that guy for following you two around all day. You managed to pull the boy into the car park as you stopped in front of his car.

“Juyeon,” You said as he continued to grumble. “Juyeon.”

He kept talking to himself before you smiled and shook your head. “Babe!”

Juyeon stopped as he looked at you. “What?”

“It’s over. You won. I doubt he’ll bother us ever again.” You told him with a laugh.

He looked at you confused. “How are you so calm? He was practically eating you with his eyes, salivating over you.”

You giggled. “Juyeon, you were protecting me. I knew I would have nothing to worry about because you’d never let anything happen to me. You’re my guy. My guard.”

“Cat.” Juyeon added.

“What?” You asked with a grin.

“I’m your guard, cat. You said you like cats more than dogs. I’m your cat, so I’m your guard cat.” He said as a smile grew on his face.

You looked at him for a moment as you giggled again, pecking his lips. “What you are is outrageously adorable, but I like what you said too. Now come on, I want to spend the rest of my birthday at home.”

“With your guard cat?” Juyeon asked.

You kissed him again as he wrapped his arms tightly around you, nuzzling his nose into your face. “Yes, Juyeon. With my guard cat. Thank you for always being my guard cat, Lee Juyeon.”

He pecked your temple. “Forever and always, my dear.”

[lovecinnatwist]

ooooooooooh, Omega Jason adopts Tim and Mother's milk?? 👀

Yayyyy two of my faves!

Omega Jason adopts Tim- its basically a tower AU!

The blood curling keen of a puppy longing for pack snaps Jason back to himself. 

He’s standing over the shriveling, shrunk figure. The desperation and fear nearly covers him with a physical layer of musk. Before the bow staff can come down, stiff fingers release, sending the weapon crashing to the floor.

There’s a flinch. Clear and violent as the tiny trembling figure tries to crawl back. Jason chases after it. He chases until the pup is up against the corner teary eyes wide with terror. The chuff is awkward and heavy in his chest. It shifts through emotions of rage, betrayal and blood lust until something foriegn and sweet bubbles up to the surface. 

Packless, Lonely, unloved. 

Jason knows it well and knows that he can’t hurt the fragile thing trying to scramble away from him. 

Which he had every right to. Jason had been going to- well he had been about to- none of that matters. He can’t think about that now. He needs to get his hands on his pup and get him out of here before the real monster can get to him. Not the man in a purple suit, acridic makeup and greasy green hair- but a billionaire in leather and kevlar and promises nothing but broken dreams. 

“ C’mere puppy. “

---

Mothers milk is a touch darker. It's all about how Talia used her omega nature to manipulate Jason during the lost days!

“ ‘Ahlaa My precious son do not hide anything from mother. Never anything from your Umm. “

A large part of him wants to move away from the touch but it’s so gentle and loving he melts into it. Talia touches him with such sweetness and love that his heart aches. He feels like it’s overflowing. It’s the only thing that chases away the green so he doesn’t stop her. Instead when she tells him to drink he submits and does so. 

She calls him many things. ‘Ahlaa, Habibi, Beloved- There’s a far away thought that there’s something wrong here but when she introduces him to the small child whom he’s to call Ahki Jason realizes he is thinking too much. 

He is awkward with the pup. The feeling of the living squirming creature is foriegn despite his biology screaming that it is right. Damian is a small little thing. With piercing green eyes that cut to Jason’s very soul. It makes his stomach churn every passing moment. 

Shame is a caress against his skin as he hands the infant back. 

He doesn’t make milk and Talia expresses her disappointment in scharrine promises of soon. All while Jason’s eyes stare at her own full chest. Discomfort tenses in his stomach. He doesn’t want to but can’t will his lips to make the words. A good omega listens to their malikat al'umi.

[quxntumvandyne]

Sweet Cheeks (Tony Stark x Reader)

Words: 921(it’s short i’m sorry)

Warnings: flirtinggggg ooooo

Requested: BY MY HOMEGIRL BIB @magic-marvel

Summary: Being Mr. Stark’s personal assistant comes with pros and cons, one of them being Tony’s constant flirtatious personality in the workplace. It was hard to focus and you knew he had a thing for you; what if you played along?

A/N: IT SUCKS BUT HERE WE GO YAYYYY

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!! and if you wanna be on my permanent taglist, just ask!

MASTERLIST

. . . . .

“Fancy meeting you here, sweet cheeks.”

“Tony, you asked me on the date.”

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.

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You didn’t know or care much about Tony Stark. That was until, you had become his personal assistant. It basically then, became your job to know and care about everything he had done or needed to do. Which drove you crazy, because he was a total ass. He could do absolutely nothing, and he’d still manage to annoy you somehow.

Everyone was convinced you two had the hots for each other but you weren’t convinced. Sure, Tony flirted with you but he flirted with girl practically. It’s his nature. Sure he was pretty nice to look at and you weren’t half bad yourself, but nothing would ever happen. Not that you wanted it to.

You had just arrived at the complex when you already had 12 messages from Tony, asking when you’d arrive. You roll your eyes as you walk in with you bag to meet him and discuss upcoming events he needed to attend.

 “How can I focus when such a pretty lady is sitting right in front of me?”

Tony had been flirting with you since you started working for him. but today had been one of the worst. Basically anything that came out of his mouth was flirtatious and you began to formulate an idea in your head.

I wonder what Tony would do if I flirt back?

You thought this all out while going over Tony’s schedule with him and what needed to be done today when Tony asked you a question.

“Are you hungry?”

“A bit. Why’s that Mr. Stark?”

“Y/N, we’ve been over this. Call me Tony sweetcheeks.”

“I don’t know, Tony.” You said, turning toward him and slowly standing up, never breaking eye contact with him. “Mr. Stark just seems more professional doesn’t it?”

You walked behind him, Tony still in his chair and a bit stiffer now. You could tell that he was more tense at your sudden attitude change.

“Yeah, I guess your right Y/N but maybe you shouldn’t be so professional all the time,” Tony replied, turning his chair to look at you.

You looked him up and down in his casual clothes for the day; long sleeve dark blue shirt and black joggers. He seemed to go for comfort today, while you were in a black strapless jumpsuit and short white heels, making you still shorter than Tony. You walked closer to him with his eyes looking you down and up, but only until you held him by his chin with your other hand on the arm rest and you were almost nose to nose.

“You seem a bit stiff Mr. Stark. Anything bothering you?” you said, looking at his lips and biting your own bottom one. You let go of his chin and he began to stand up, so close you could feel his hot breath on you.

“Nothing is bothering me, but things just got a bit more interesting don’t you think?” Tony said, walking so close that he backed you into the glass and put his hand on yours very gently, with his expression becoming more soft.

He looked at you with softness in his eyes. “Hi.”

You’d never seen him this way before and all those claims from others about you two liking one another and maybe they were all right. You’d never seen Tony make this expression before. Especially with you. But a warm feeling rose in your chest and you interlocked you fingers with his.

“Hi Tony.” You said gently. You never noticed that there was a bit of amber in the brown of his eyes. You grabbed his other hand and intertwined your fingers again with your back pressed against the cold glass. You experienced something different with Tony in these few moments you stood together enjoying the closeness of your bodies when Tony leaned down and and gently kissed your cheek.

He lingered for a few seconds, you feeling a warm sensation spread throughout your body and you melted into him immediately.

You had had feelings for him for awhile but you buried them inside your own head with thoughts of hatred because you didn’t think he liked you. It almost felt like a high school love story, even though you were adults but that seemed to be fine with both of you. It seemed that Tony felt the same way and now you could express what you’ve secretly wanted to for awhile.

You pulled away from each other but right before you did, Tony whispered something in your ear.

“What size dress do you wear sweetcheeks, because I’d like to spoil you if you’d let me take you out tonight.” Tony winked at you like he always did but it felt more genuine this time, making you laugh.

“Depends on where you’re taking me sweetcheeks.” He widened his eyes at the joke you’d made and then jumped up to give him a small kiss on the cheek before seeing the rest of the group at the complex speechless and frozen in their tracks. After a few seconds, Rogers screams “Finally!” as the whole group comes over to discover that you two had finally realized you liked one another after a year of working together.

Later that night, you and Tony went on your date at a nice restaurant and had a walk afterward back to your apartment, because Tony wanted to be a “gentleman”.

He tried his best and he succeeded, time and time again.

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hope you all liked it!!!!!

 permanent taglist: @holland-haven @minnie-marvel @magic-marvel @sunflowerannawrites @peter-prkers @highlady-ofthe-summercourt @e-ms-world @signed-potato @0captain-marvel0

[squirenonny]

All squares have been claimed!

Sooooo.... Been a while. Sorry ‘bout that. Life, you know?

Fun story about this one. I've worked 10 of the last 11 days and missed my lunch break on two of those days (yayyyy Thanksgiving week at a grocery store~) Anyway, I was dead tired all this week and couldn't focus on any of my WIPs, so I scrolled through my list of @badthingshappenbingo​ prompts and this one sparked my interest.

Got 500 words into it before realizing why "Worked Themself to Exhaustion" might be striking a chord. |D

Anyway, enjoy! You can also find this on AO3 here!

Spoilers through Chapter 31 of Shadows of Stars. Chapter 34 provides some useful additional context for this chapter, but you won't find any actual spoilers for that chapter here. Set sometime nebulously in the future, relative to the most recent update.

Worked Themself to Exhaustion

Original prompt (from anon): Allura/Meri 'Worked Themselves to Exhaustion' for the Bad Things Happen Bingo?

Allura found Meri on the bridge several hours past midnight, standing at one of the computer terminals near Coran's station, backlit by a frosty blue glow. "Are you still up?"

Meri jumped at the sound of her voice, then tried to cover with a laugh. "Allura! You scared me." Allura crossed the bridge to where she stood, pulling her dressing gown closer as she walked. She hooked her chin over Meri's shoulder and peered at the screen. "Working on something important?" Meri shrugged with the shoulder that wasn't currently supporting Alllura's chin. "Nothing terribly interesting," she said. "Just going through reports from the Accords and stuff." "Couldn't that wait till tomorrow?" Meri shrugged again, tension creeping into her spine. Allura tipped her head to the side, studying Meri's face in profile. She looked tired. She had since she'd returned from her stint as a spy, but it showed now more than ever. The screen's light only deepened the inky shadows beneath her eye and accentuated the lines pulling at the corners of her eyes, and her hair hung limp around her face, the way it did when she'd gone too long without a shower. Except in the immediate aftermath of a battle or other emergency, Allura couldn't remember ever seeing Meri so not put together. Spying had changed her. Allura didn't know the details of it; Meri had remained tight-lipped on anything that wasn't actionable information. The projects Haggar was working on, the abilities of the druids, whatever she'd managed to dig up in digital records or in conversation with other druid candidates--all of this Meri shared freely and with little inflection. It gave away more than she probably wanted to admit to, but she studiously ignored any probing questions into her own well-being. She'd done what she had to to maintain her cover, and that was all she'd say on the matter.

Allura wrapped her arms around Meri's waist, pressing flush against her back. Meri instantly tensed, every line of her like stone in Allura's embrace. Allura frowned, sneaking another look at Meri's face. Lit from beneath by the display screen, it looked even more gaunt than ever, her eyes dull and distant. "Why don't you step away for a while?" Allura asked, trying not to put any judgement into the question. "Come get some sleep, start fresh in the morning. I'll help?" Meri gave an awkward shrug, her eyes never leaving the screen. She reached out mechanically to navigate the menus, and Allura idly followed her progress. She wasn't doing anything any more involved than she'd said. Just cataloging distress calls, routing memos from the Accords and the paladins' allies, approving maintenance reports and other minutiae of castle upkeep. She did it all with that same stiff posture, remaining rigid in Allura's arms. Maybe it was just Allura imagining things, but she seemed to actually be leaning away from her touch. "Meri?" Allura asked. She hesitated, all her diplomatic training failing her as she found she had no idea how to ask what she wanted to. Meri preempted her by turning around, a smile softening her face. It was a convincing smile, too. It even reached her eyes to crinkle them at the corners in the way that was so utterly Meri. But they were close enough that Allura could sense the faint currents of Quintessence running beneath her skin. Meri had shifted her features to produce this smile. If she wanted to, Allura could have reached out and cut the strands of Quintessence, forcing Meri out of the shift. She held off, but it wasn't respect for Meri's privacy that stayed her hand so much as a fear of what she would find underneath the perfect smile. How broken was Meri, that she couldn't even force a smile on her own face? "Sorry, 'Lura," Meri said. "I really should get this done tonight. Don't feel like you need to wait up for me, though. I know you've got an early day tomorrow." It was a dismissal, clear as day, and it stung enough that Allura couldn't scrounge together a response. She just gaped at Meri, fighting against her hurt and indignation. This wasn't about her. She couldn't lose sight of that. This was about Meri, hurting and upset and ashamed of it all for some reason Allura couldn't fathom, except that she knew what Meri looked like when she was punishing herself. She'd looked very much like this in the aftermath of Allura's mother's death. Freshly bonded to Blue, she'd withdrawn, building up a facade of strength and indifference in an attempt to be what she thought everyone expected her to be. She hadn't known how to build shifts like this back then, but Allura thought she would have worn them if she could. She'd never wanted to add her baggage to other people's. Meri didn't wait for Allura to find her voice. She just turned back to her busy work, shutting Allura out entirely. Allura could have pressed, could have turned this into a fight, but that wasn't what she wanted. It wasn't what either of them wanted, she suspected. In Meri's eyes, she probably thought she was sparing Allura the worse pain. With a heavy heart and a tongue that felt like cotton in her mouth, Allura retreated. She would talk to Coran in the morning. He might have some advice for her on what to do to help.

Coran wished he could say he was surprised when Allura came to him about Meri, but of all the ways to describe how he felt about this complicated nest of emotions, shock was not one of them. He was, after all, adjunct to the Blue Lion. He'd felt Meri's torment since long before she returned to the castle. Allura had been waiting outside his room when he woke for his morning duties--an early call even for Allura, who had always hated wasting the day away by sleeping in. She'd been dancing on her toes, clearly battling herself over whether or not to knock on his door and risk rousing him early. One look at Allura told him all he needed to know, especially coupled with the groggy malaise he sensed from Meri's direction. She wasn't asleep, though he thought she might have been trying. For once. "It's going to take time," he told Allura once she'd finished pouring out all her concerns. He'd ushered her back into his room and sat her on the edge of his bed, sending off a quick message while he fetched the down comforter that had always been her favorite. Something had come up, he told the ranking officer on the bridge, and he would be late to his usual rounds. "I know you were hoping for a better answer, and I wish I had one to give you." Allura sighed, pulling the corners of the blanket tight at her throat and leaning on Coran's shoulder. "I just want to be able to help her. I know she's hurting. Why won't she let me see it?" That was a complicated question with a complicated answer, and Coran didn't think Allura needed him to say so. She knew as well as anyone how hard it could be to admit weakness, even to a loved one. How long had she carried her grief for her father close to her own heart before she let the other paladins see her mourning? And this situation with Meri was more complicated still. Coran had seen glimpses of it in Thace, and he'd felt whole volumes from Meri through the bond. Considering that this insight was somewhat ill-gotten gains--and especially considering she'd pushed him away as much as she pushed away everyone else, to the point that Coran hadn't been able to tell her properly what it meant for him to be her adjunct... Well, he wasn't about to go telling Allura everything he'd inferred. "She's been through a terrible ordeal," Coran said. "I don't know the full of it, but I know she probably needs time to process. All you can do is be there for her. Remind her that she's not alone anymore. Then when she's ready to talk, she'll know who to turn to." Allura's sigh said she'd already known what it was she had to do, but she didn't like the idea of sitting around waiting for something beyond her power. That was fair. Coran didn't like waiting, either.  So an hour later, after he'd coaxed Allura back to bed to catch up on the sleep she'd lost fretting over Meri, Coran himself went to find his insomniac paladin. She was down on the training deck, apparently haven given up on resting. She didn't notice him come in, and watching her sluggish movements as she took on a training bot--fairly low-leveled compared to her usual fare--Coran had to wonder just how much sleep she'd missed since her return last week. The shadows under her eyes were darker than he remembered from even just last night, her skin dry and waxen, her hair a limp mess. And she was moving slow, too. It wasn't the sluggishness of someone nearing the end of an intense workout. Meri quite simply couldn't track the training bot's movements, which meant that it kept catching her by surprise with its attacks. Coran winced as she took a blow to the ribs, staggering back with a soft grunt of pain. Her face screwed up in frustration and rage, and she launched herself at the gladiator, foregoing the staff she'd selected for this session in favor of a more... hands-on approach. Quintessence flared bright around her fingers, crackling in the air like a living thing and filling up the space between Coran and her. He couldn't read the currents to know her intent, but her hand sank into the gladiator's chest panel. The robot froze at once, its joints locking up, and an uncharacteristically vindictive smile flashed across Meri's face as she yanked her hand back and let the gladiator fall.

The crash of metal rang loud in the sudden silence, and Coran wasted no time in stepping forward. Better to announce himself than to have Meri notice and wonder if he'd been intentionally spying. "You're up early." She whirled toward him, horror dawning on her face for a brief moment before it was smoothed over--quite literally. If he hadn't seen the transformation, he never would have guessed that Meri had donned a shift, but there was nothing natural about the way the panic in her eyes glossed over to bland disinterest, or the way her skin and hair brightened minutely, lessening the appearance of neglect and exhaustion. Even the slump of her shoulders eased by way of a subtle shift in bone structure. Coran's stomach turned at the sight--or perhaps that was the coil of fear reaching him through the bond, stronger even than the shame and guilt twisting Meri's insides into knots. "Coran!" she said brightly. "Hey! Yeah. Figured I'd start the day off right. Haven't been able to keep up with my training lately, what with all the..." She trailed off, her manufactured smile dulling somewhat as anxiety wrapped around her throat. Coran felt it like it was his own emotion, and he had to swallow before he could speak. Even then, it came out strangled. "Of course. Let me know if you ever need a sparring partner." He grinned at her startled blink. "What? I'm not an old man just yet. And I need to be on my toes, what with the whole adjunct situation." She hummed, clearly too distracted to pick up on the hint Coran was trying to give her. He sighed, contemplating how else he might broach the subject of her emotional state. She was so on edge he knew she wouldn't respond well to a direct approach, and the last thing he wanted was to make her shut him down. She needed friends now more than anything. "Do you have plans for the rest of the day, then?" he asked instead, graciously bypassing her obvious exhausted stupor. She shrugged. "I finished the signoffs last night. Went through most of the backlog of Coalition memos, too. There's a few you or Allura will have to take a look at, but..." She trailed off, tightening her mouth around a yawn. Coran wished she would just admit how tired she was--or at least admit what it was that was keeping her from sleep. It felt wrong to ignore the yelmore in the room when he could have punctured her facade without much effort. But that wasn't what it meant to be the blue adjunct. He knew what his paladins needed, and what Meri needed right now wasn't more guilt on top of what she had already piled on herself. To have churned through so much work last night--Coran, better than anyone, knew just how much of a slog that would have been. He was amazed she hadn't fallen asleep at the console halfway through the fiftieth dull report from an ally somewhere. "Well," he said brightly, clapping his hands together. "Thank you for clearing that off my plate. If it's not too much to ask of you, perhaps I could get your help with a few more tasks?" A flush of pride briefly overtook Meri at Coran's thanks--far too much pride for such a simple thing, and it spoke to the depth of her self-loathing. Even more baffling was the staggering sense of relief that answered his request for help. Coran took a page from Meri's book and applied a touch of a shift to his face to conceal his alarm. He wasn't as practiced at it as Meri, and he was sure there were flaws in his shift--he'd never been the best at crafting new forms for himself, and he'd never attempted a partial shift like this before. Thankfully, Meri was too tired to scrutinize him too closely. She crossed the training room to retrieve her discarded staff, nearly toppling over in the attempt. She caught herself on the wall, freezing for a moment as a flood of heat washed through her. She was keenly aware of Coran's eyes on her; he could feel her self-consciousness and averted his eyes before he realized what he was doing, but even knowing its source, he couldn't make himself look directly at her until she'd stowed the staff in the weapons rack and joined him by the door. She wove a bit as she walked with him toward the elevator, fatigue written in every line of her body. She didn't offer any conversation, and he didn't try to tease it out of her. She looked like she might fall asleep standing up--and, in all honesty, Coran would have been glad of it. He didn't feel her exhaustion, exactly. It wasn't carried through the bond like true emotions. But there was a thick haze over her mood, dampening her emotions and heightening those few flashes that broke through the muddle, and trying to adjust himself to it all did give him a taste of what she must have been feeling. She didn't ask where they were going. If Coran had to guess, he would say she didn't care. It seemed to Coran she just wanted something to keep her moving. To keep her awake. He wondered if it was dreams that were bothering her. He reminded himself, again, that she didn't owe him answers, and let the silence swell as they neared their destination. He'd contemplated several options for the first step of what was sure to be a long journey to healing for Meri. She needed sleep, certainly, and he'd briefly entertained the idea of taking her up to the map room in the hopes that the low lighting and peaceful atmosphere might coax her into an involuntary nap. It seemed a little heavy-handed, especially as he couldn't be sure it would be worth the effort. He might well only succeed in stoking Meri's resentment before she stalked off to less lulling pursuits. So instead, he'd opted for a simpler deception. He'd asked Thace to join them in one of the equipment storage rooms for a routine systems check on the supply of BLIP-tech drones. It was a suitably voluminous task to justify having three people assigned to it, but straight-forward enough that it didn't require the attention of someone trained in the upkeep of complex machines. All that was really required was a visual inspection of the casing for damage or corrosion and a manual verification of the last self-check. Thace didn't know anything of the troubles Meri had been facing--at least, not more than he might have inferred because of his own history with espionage. Coran hadn't asked him to speak with Meri, nor had he told him that he had arranged for Zelka to call him away half an hour into the task. It didn't make this any less meddling, but at least he wasn't conspiring on top of that.

Besides, he couldn't very well have just asked Meri to go see Thace. Coran had long suspected she was deliberately avoiding Thace, and the way she stiffened when she saw him waiting inside the storage bay lent credence to that theory. Her steps slowed, her shift slipping momentarily as she visibly weighed the benefits of simply walking out of the room. She eventually decided to see it through, though her reluctance was strong enough to slow Coran's steps, too, and he shook himself, clapping his hands briskly as he entered the room. "Well!" he said, sending a silent apology to Thace, who had startled at the sudden noise. "Now that we're all here, let's get started, shall we?" It took only a few moments to demonstrate the checks, and then they were all off, working their way down separate rows at their own pace. Meri lagged behind the other two, moving on autopilot and struggling to stay awake, but Coran didn't call her on it. They were spread far enough apart that conversation was unnecessary and somewhat awkward, so they worked in companionable silence until Zelka called and Coran took his leave. He only prayed that Thace could help Meri where the rest of them couldn't.

Meri silently cursed Coran for leaving her alone with Thace, and then felt immediately guilty for the thought. There was nothing at all wrong with Thace. He was a good man, and the advice and resources he'd provided her with when she left on her ill-informed espionage mission had probably saved her life several times over. It had certainly enabled some of her more idiotic decisions, but that was hardly his fault. It also wasn't his fault being around him reminded her too much of her time in Haggar's inner circle. He had a way about him, a vigilance even soldiers like Shiro and Keith couldn't match. He was aware of his surroundings at all times, wary of potential threats, but he also watched with an eye that was well practiced at looking below the surface. He didn't have to stare for her to feel as though she were being picked apart. The only saving grace in this situation was that he was two rows over and Coran had promised to make this as quick as he could. With luck, he'd return from helping Zelka in ten or twenty minutes, and Meri could go back to shuffling along like a zombie and trying not to pass out in the middle of her inspection. Quiznak. She was so tired. She shook her head, though, shoving away her exhaustion, and kept moving. She finished ten drones, then twenty, and still Coran hadn't returned. Thirty drones on, she looked up to see Thace approaching down the next row. He was focused on his task, but his proximity raised an alarm in her bones. Someone was here. She couldn't let her guard down. She never had found a way to confirm whether or not her shifts held while she slept, and if he saw something he wasn't supposed to-- Meri caught herself following familiar old tracks of paranoid thought and stopped where she was, staring at her reflection in the polished shell of the BLIP-tech drone. What was she talking about? She wasn't on the Eryth anymore. She was among friends, and she didn't need to worry about someone seeing that she was an Altean. A purple cast had crept into her hand while she was drowning in pointless panic, and she banished that, too, mentally checking herself for any other Galra traits that might have slipped through. It had happened at least once a day since she'd returned--fangs, fur, purple pigmentation. Once she'd fully shifted her ears to the longer, floppier version she'd used as part of her Reza shift. Thace continued working as he drew near to Meri, not looking up from the screen in front of him. "Have you ever tried krebu?" Meri lifted her head to frown at Thace. Logic said he was talking to her. After all, there was no one else in the room. Still, her tired mind couldn't quite grasp the concept of conversation. "What?" she finally said, eloquently. Thace had enough tact not to comment on her mental state. "It's a tea," Thace said. "Old Galra recipe--though perhaps not as old as we like to pretend." Meri cracked a smile at that, the expression pulling at muscles that she swore she hadn't used in months. "I imagine a lot of things seem old until you meet someone from ten thousand years ago. It's good?" "A little bland for my taste, but I suppose that's the point." "The... point?" "It's a common remedy among civilian families. A lot of my men grew up with a parent or grandparent who liked to prescribe it for all sorts of ails. Nadezda swears by it. Personally, I find it hard to believe a few herbs can do all that people claim it can. It is good for insomnia, though. Better than anything else I've tried." Suspicion came roaring back in, popping Meri's bubble of complacency. She reinforced her placid partial shift on instinct before Thace's last statement clicked into place. "You too, huh?" she asked, well aware that she was admitting her own weakness. Well, a piece of it, at any rate. But Thace had a nonjudgmental air about him and, more importantly, there was just enough distance between them for it not to feel like a threat. It wasn't like with Allura and Coran, or even Lance and Rosa. She didn't-- Well, it wasn't that she didn't care what Thace thought of her. She just didn't think he'd known her long enough to have expectations for her to live up to. Thace smiled. "Ever since I left the Accords," he said softly. Something passed between them in those few words. An understanding, of sorts, that went beyond the insomnia. He'd been there. He'd done things to maintain his cover--awful, horrible things. Things that haunted him. Things he regretted, and had regretted from the moment he did them, but he'd done them all the same because the mission mattered more than one solitary person's conscience. The tears took her by surprise, as did most emotion these days. It snuck up on her, stealing her breath, and she turned back to her work before Thace could see her tearing up. She tried to breathe, but breathing only widened the cracks in her composure, so that left her holding her breath and squeezing her eyes shut, as though by forcing the tears out faster she could reach the end of this hysteria sooner. Hysteria. She almost had to laugh at the fact that this was the word her mind had conjured to describe herself, when she'd always hated the way it was so often slung to undermine someone's emotional turmoil. To cheapen it. But she'd impersonated a druid, participated in the interrogation and torture of Imperial prisoners, risked death on a daily basis, and now here she was, crying over tea. Maybe hysteria was an apt word, in this case. "How do you do it?" she asked, hating the way her voice shook but unable to stop the words pouring out of her mouth. Thace remained quiet, waiting for her to elaborate, and she waved her hand in the air, using the gesture as an excuse to wipe her cheeks. She still stared at the pod in front of her. "After everything we've seen, everything we've done, how are we supposed to go back to the way things were?" "Slowly," Thace said, frankly, "and with the support of people who are better than us." He shifted, and when Meri finally turned, she found he had given up all pretense of keeping busy and was watching her now--with sympathy, yes, but also with an ache she knew all too well. "Is it the memories?" "No." Meri hesitated. "...Yes and no. Not memories as such. Just..." She turned away, a lump rising in her throat. "It's like it's not my mind that's stuck back there so much as my body. I couldn't... I never slept through the night while I was there. I was too afraid someone would walk in and notice something off about my shift." Her voice wavered, and she cursed herself, wiping her eyes now with both hands. There was nothing subtle about it, but Thace was far too perceptive to have missed the signs of an impending breakdown, anyway, and she just didn't have the energy to keep pretending. "I don't have to worry about that now. I shouldn't-- I want to sleep, but every time I try I wake up an hour later in a panic. It was worse when I tried to sleep in Allura's bed. It was-- She was there, and there was a part of me that thought she was the enemy."

Remembering that moment, remembering the way she'd reached for a weapon, the way she'd come so close to lashing out, to attacking the one person who mattered more to her than anything else in the universe--

Meri choked on a sob, shaking her head to dislodge the what-ifs that had been haunting her ever since. "When I wake up like that, I can't just go back to sleep. I'm up for another eight hours or more, and the only thing I can do is try to go until I'm about to drop and hope the exhaustion buys me an extra twenty minutes or so before it all starts over again." Her vision had blurred so much by now that she could hardly make Thace out across the row of drones, but he approached slowly, telegraphing his moves. Meri hated that she was so fragile he felt he had to treat her like a wounded animal, but she couldn't pretend she wasn't scared of how she might have reacted otherwise. She didn't expect him to trust her when she couldn't even trust herself. Instead, though, she remained where she was as he approached, his arms spread in a silent invitation. Of all the people in the castle who might have offered her a hug, Thace was pretty far down on the list, but coming from him it didn't feel so much like pity. She teetered on the edge for a moment, then fell against him, turning all her focus toward her breathing in a desperate attempt not to fall apart completely in his arms. "I'm sorry," Meri whispered, turning her forehead into his shoulder. She wasn't sure what she was apologizing for--crying on the lapels of his uniform? Or having this breakdown on him, instead of literally anyone else? She had a whole castle full of people with more reasons than Thace to care about her bullshit. Thace only hummed, an echo of a melody in the sound. "You have nothing to apologize for. Your actions saved a great deal more people than they harmed. It will get easier to see that, with time." Meri scrunched her face up as the flow of tears increased. "I know," she said, not knowing if it was the truth. "I just wish I'd been better." "Be better now," Thace said. "That's all you can do. And remember, this team you have... They don't know the things we know. I pray they never have to learn. But they know a thing or two about healing a fractured spirit... Coran knows the weight of regret as well as us, in his own way." Meri snorted with a sudden realization, then felt immediately silly for not having seen it before now. Vrekt, she really was tired. "He didn't just 'get called away,' did he?" Thace hummed again, one hand rubbing circles on her back. "I very much doubt it. For what it's worth, I didn't figure it out until he got the call, either." "Well... It kind of worked out, in the end," Meri admitted. She lingered in Thace's embrace for another moment, then pulled back. "Thanks. And... I'm sorry. I don't want to burden you with all of my drama." "It's not a burden to offer a little sympathy every now and again," Thace said. "I'm sure Allura and Coran would say the same." "I don't know if I can talk about it with them. Not yet." Thace smiled. "Then tell them that. They'll understand. The wonderful thing about comfort is that it doesn't require exhaustive knowledge of the context. They already know you're hurting; that's enough to start. Tell them what you can, and tell them that you're not ready for the rest, and then just... go from there." Tell them what she could, huh? Meri wasn't sure what that was, but she was long past the point of having enough energy to keep running from the darkness of her own mind. She just wanted to feel safe in her own body again. "Okay," she said. "I'll try." She wiped her eyes again, and pulled back to stand beside the next BLIP-tech drone in the row. She hesitated before beginning her inspection, however, and opened her mouth to ask a question that never came. "Go on," Thace said. "I don't think you need to stay here any longer." He glanced sidelong at his own drone. "If Coran actually needs this to be done, I'm sure he can find someone else to help him." "Punishing him for tricking you?" Meri asked with a feeble smile. Thace chuckled. "If he asks, I'll tell him we figured out what he actually wanted us to do and came to the logical conclusion that nothing else was required of us." Meri shook her head, but she wasn't going to complain about getting the rest of the day off. Her little miniature breakdown had worn her out faster than three hours on the training deck. She might actually make it a full two hours before she woke this time. She nodded to Thace and took a single step toward the door, then stopped again. "Actually...." "Krebu?" Thace asked with a knowing smile. "I stole some while we were on homeworld. Would you care to join me for a cup?" Meri smiled, a weight lifting from her shoulders. "I'd like that very much."

Allura got another hour of sleep before giving up the effort. A very large part of her wanted to go find Meri--not that she knew what she would do after that point. Her conversation with Coran kept rattling around in her head. Be there for Meri, but don't push. It was a delicate balance to strike, especially for someone like Allura, who by her nature wanted to fix problems, not merely commiserate. Unfortunately, Coran was right. This wasn't a problem she could fix. There was no clever solution she could propose that would mend all of Meri's hurts, and until Meri reached a point where she was ready to ask for help, there was very little Allura could do. But she would commiserate until the end of time if that was what Meri needed. It would be better than trying to help and getting pushed away again. Apparently she had time to come to terms with the gentle approach, though, because Meri seemed to have finally gone in search of sleep--or at the very least, she wasn't in any of her usual haunts, new or old. No in any of her favorite places--the synthetic hot springs at the top of Blue Tower, the observation deck where they'd spent so many evenings watching the stars. She wasn't with Blue, either, and Lance hadn't seen her all morning. But she wasn't on the bridge or the training deck either. She may have been in her room, but if she was, Allura was loathe to disturb her. Allura stifled her disappointment and returned to the observation deck to think. It was good that Meri had allowed herself to take a break. She needed all the rest she could get. It did leave Allura feeling rather useless, however. Coran had told her to take the morning off, which meant she still had several hours before he expected her on the bridge. She supposed she could go find Shiro and see what else needed to be done today. She contemplated doing just that, but she'd already settled in on the cushioned bench beside the large, round window, a blanket draped over her lap and a mound of pillows behind her. It was a cozy little nest (not as cozy as it would have been with Meri beside her, but some things were outside of Allura's control), and she was reluctant to move. She wasn't sure how long she sat there, watching the slow drift of stars as the castle-ship drifted through space, but it was long enough that she'd begun to drift herself, her mind falling into that pleasant, weightless warmth right on the edge of sleep. The door hissing opened startled her awake, and she scrubbed at crusty eyes as she turned to see who had found her. Meri stood in the doorway, a sweater in the human style pulled over her rumpled uniform. She had a steaming mug in each hand, bags under her eyes, and a shy smile on her face. "Meri!" Allura stood, tripping over her blanket. She was wide awake now--wide awake and filled with directionless energy. She wanted to say something to Meri, but she didn't know what. Didn't know why Meri had come to find her, after spending the last week trying her best to avoid being alone together. Meri closed the distance between them first, holding out one of her mugs to Allura. "I brought you some cocoa," she said. "Rosa's recipe." "Oh," Allura said, staring dumbly at the mug. "Thank you." They stood there awkwardly for a few moments longer, Meri staring into her own mug, which looked more like tea than cocoa, Allura watching Meri for a sign of what she wanted Allura to do. She looked more vulnerable than she had last night, like she'd finally decided to let her guard down, but Allura didn't want to ruin that by asking probing questions. "Do you... Do you want to watch the stars with me?" Allura finally asked. Meri's answering smile lit a bonfire in Allura's chest, and they settled in together on the bench by the window, shoulders pressed together, the blanket spread over both their laps. The cocoa was delicious, and it spread the warmth throughout Allura's body, soothing some of her nerves. "I'm sorry I've been so distant," Meri said, both hands wrapped around her mug. She stared out at the stars, the soft blue glow of the room's emergency lighting catching in her hair, which was still damp from a recent shower. The light softened her, washing away the marks of her experiences in Haggar's circle. Allura laid a hand on her arm. "You don't need to apologize, Meri. You've been through a lot. You're allowed to take some time to adjust." Meri gave her a watery smile, laying her own hand atop Allura's. "Thanks. I... I know you want to help, and you deserve to know everything. I just... I don't know when I'll be ready to talk about it. It's all too fresh right now. Is it okay if we just... sit... for a while? I've missed you." "I missed you, too," Allura said, squeezing Meri's wrist. "We can do whatever you like. You know I'll always be here for you." Meri's face crumpled, and she gave a self-conscious laugh as Allura pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry," she said, her voice hitching. "I just... You shouldn't promise things when you don't have all the information." Allura's throat constricted, and she carefully set aside their two mugs--her still mostly full, Meri's down to the dregs. She turned, cradling Meri's cheek in the palm of hand and gently turning her head until their eyes met. "You're right that I don't know everything you've done," she said, bringing up her other hand to curl around the back of meri's neck, her fingers tangling in the short, fine hairs at the base of her skull. "But I know you, and I know why you did what you did. That's enough for now. When you're ready to talk about what happened, I'll listen, but I already know nothing you say will change how I feel about you." Meri's eyes watered, and she pulled away from Allura's touch. "You can't know that." "Of course I can," Allura whispered. She leaned back into the mound of pillows, pulling Meri with her. "We're at war, Meri. We all face impossible decisions--some more horrific than others. Sometimes we regret our decisions. Sometimes we wish there had been another way." She paused, weighing her words. "You think I think less of Shiro for his past? Or Keith? Thace? I won't pretend that the decisions I've had to make are anything like what you've faced, but I'm not naive. I know the ugliness that exists in this universe." Meri wound tighter in Allura's arms for a moment, then slowly relaxed against her, her breathing evening out. "I guess we all do, by now."

"Unfortunately." Allura wove her fingers into Meri's hair, combing it back from her face. "But I also know that good people are still good, whatever ugliness they’ve faced, and that we can still carve out places to breathe for a moment, away from it all."

"Places like here?" Meri asked, turning so her chin rested on Allura's breastbone. A crooked smile had taken over her face, and it made Allura's heart melt.

"Places like here. Whatever ugliness is out there, I won't let it reach you while we're together. I swear it. So try to get some rest, all right?"

Meri's smile slipped. "I... I'll try. But, Allura, you need to know--sometimes, when I first wake up, I forget that I'm not back there. I don't--You don't need to worry about it. I'm dealing. I'm learning how to. But you should know, because I'm probably going to wake up in a couple hours, and there's a good chance I'll wake you up when I do."

Allura's chest tightened in sympathy, and she kissed Meri's forehead. "Thank you for telling me. Is there anything I can do to help if that happens? Or should I give you space?"

"Space," Meri said, after a moment's pause. "Just for a minute. Just until I figure out what's happening."

Smiling, Allura guided Meri's head down onto her chest. "I can do that. Now rest. I'll be here when you wake up."

"I love you, Allura."

"I love you, too. I always will."