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Progress pride flag made from the Dead Boy Detectives :)
#they are walking pride flags#my favorite dead married couple on acid#this took an embarrassingly long amount of time to make#payneland#charles rowland#edwin payne#charles x edwin#edwin x charles#the dead boy detective agency#dead boy detectives#dbda#dead boy detective agency#dead boy detective netflix#art#dbda art#is it accurate to tag this as art?#idk but whatever
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Swearing in Dead Boy Detectives: Crystal Palace Surname-Von Hoverkraft
Overview:
115 curses total, 12 different words said in 8 episodes.
Episode 1: 2 Fuck, 2 Shit, 1 Ass, 4 God, 3 Jesus, 2 Screw
Episode 2: 6 Shit, 6 God, 1 Jesus
Episode 3: 4 Fuck, 6 Shit, 1 Bitch, 1 Ass, 2 Damn, 2 Hell, 3 God, 1 Jesus
Episode 4: 2 Fuck, 1 Shit, 1 Ass, 2 Hell, 1 God, 1 Jesus
Episode 5: 1 Fuck, 4 Shit, 4 God, 1 Pussy, 1 Dick, 2 Screw
Episode 6: 4 Fuck, 2 Shit, 1 Ass, 2 Hell, 3 God
Episode 7: 2 Fuck, 6 Shit, 1 Ass, 4 God, 1 Jesus, 1 Screw
Episode 8: 5 Fuck, 5 Shit, 2 Bitch, 7 God, 1 Jesus, 1 Prick
Curses Per Episode:
Episode 1: 14
Episode 2: 13
Episode 3: 20
Episode 4: 8
Episode 5: 13
Episode 6: 12
Episode 7: 15
Episode 8: 21
Uses Per Word:
Crystal’s favorite curse words are Shit and God, which she says 32 times each! In third place is Fuck, which she says 20 times.
Shit: 32
God: 32
Fuck: 20
Jesus: 8
Hell: 6
Ass: 5
Screw: 5
Bitch: 3
Damn: 2
Pussy: 1
Dick: 1
Prick: 1
Unique words:
Crystal and the Cat King are the only characters who say Pussy.
Crystal and Charles are the only characters who say Prick.
Crystal, Jenny, and Esther are the only characters who say Screw.
Crystal, the Cat King, and Twitchy Richie are the only characters who say Dick.
Percent of Total:
Crystal swears 115 times throughout the season, which is 35.9% of all cursing in the show.
Rankings:
Who Swears the Most: Crystal is in 1st place, with 116 times.
Most Curses in an Episode: Crystal holds 7 spots on the top 10 ‘Curses per Character per Episode’ list:
Curse Word Variety: Crystal comes in 2nd for swearing variety, with 12 different words used throughout the show.
Individual Words: She holds the top spots for usages of seven different words: Fuck (20), Shit (32), God (32), Jesus (8), Hell (6), Ass (4) and Screw (5). She is also tied for first for her unique word usages of Pussy (with the Cat King), Dick (with the Cat King and Twitchy Richie), and Prick (with Charles) one use of each.
Lines:
Episode 1: Oh my god, why can't I remember?
Episode 1: It's just a stupid fucking name.
Episode 1: Jesus, where did he go?
Episode 1: Oh, Jesus. I'm gonna wait in the bathroom until they leave.
Episode 1: Holy shit, did you take some of my memories? I don't have some screwed-up amnesia, you took them.
Episode 1: God! I just need a second, okay?
Episode 1: So maybe he's our fucking demon now!
Episode 1: God, I just want to take their heads and just crush them together, I am so mad!
Episode 1: Jesus, I am such an idiot.
Episode 1: Oh my god, I never even thought about the fact that they could still be alive.
Episode 1: Which was totally my bad and very screwed up and I should have told you everything.
Episode 1: Holy shit. (Edwin tells her about girl turned into small piece of plastic)
Episode 1: He's still a stalker, still an asshole. But I am going to get my memories back.
Episode 2: Ok, props for the like, Herculean-level effort, but vandalizing my shit isn't getting us anywhere.
Episode 2: Oh, shit. Sorry. (Almost runs into Niko)
Episode 2: Oh my god, holy shit! (Niko collapses)
Episode 2: God, I feel lonely too.
Episode 2: Jesus, you guys are like a dead married couple on acid.
Episode 2: Oh my God! Holy shit, how does today keep getting more disgusting?
Episode 2: God (After Edwin asks 'And were there any graves or decaying bodies near her in the woods?')
Episode 2: Oh my god, Charles back me up.
Episode 2: Oh, shit, uh... (Sees sprite-controlled Niko in butcher shop)
Episode 2: Oh my god, Niko! (Niko starts seizing)
Episode 2: Niko? Holy shit, your hair!
Episode 3: Holy shit, who knew this town was such a Mecca for troubled ghosts?
Episode 3: I just heard some people talking about it in the um, God, it was the… malt shop and it sounded super crazy.
Episode 3: What the actual fuck?
Episode 3: Jesus, I can't watch this again.
Episode 3: Just what the fuck is it?
Episode 3: So ok, if we figure out what sent that piece of shit dad over the edge, we can what? Free the family?
Episode 3: Good luck finding it now, asshole.
Episode 3: Where the hell did he go?
Episode 3: Thank god, there he is.
Episode 3: His dad was bad, Edwin. Royally fucked-up bad.
Episode 3: And if I have to hear that goddamn song one more time, I am gonna lose my shit.
Episode 3: Oh shit, yes.
Episode 3: Oh my god. Son of a bitch owned an electronics store.
Episode 3: Damn it, I know you choose the worst times to show up on purpose.
Episode 3: Go to hell.
Episode 3: I am done wasting my energy on your fuck-boy bullshit.
Episode 3: (Crystal we did it) Holy shit, we actually did.
Episode 4: Sorry, I've just been dealing with some shitty stuff with my ex.
Episode 4: God, it's driving me crazy.
Episode 4: What in the hell was that?
Episode 4: Jesus, she thought about it too, like she definitely knew something and then it was just riddle.
Episode 4: You fucked with my head, I'm gonna fuck with yours.
Episode 4: Niko- thanks for like, saving my ass today.
Episode 4: And I am tired of riddles and spirits and demons and not being any closer to finding out who the hell I am.
Episode 5: Holy shit! (Waking up from nightmare)
Episode 5: Oh god. Cash and condoms. Thanks.
Episode 5: Oh, no it's porn, it's all just porn. Oh my god.
Episode 5: Deep down, guys that make gay jokes are always the biggest pussies.
Episode 5: Because all nice guys give their girlfriends date rape drugs to screw with their future.
Episode 5: You walk around acting like the sun always shines, and then you lost your shit while beating the Night Nurse. Edwin and I are walking on eggshells around you instead of just saying 'what the actual fuck?'
Episode 5: I am really not sorry the world is short two toxic dickheads.
Episode 5: It's a really shitty thing to have in common.
Episode 5: Hey Jenny? Hey, what's with the fl- Holy shit.
Episode 5: No boy is screwing my life up.
Episode 5: I can't keep him out of my head. God, he just keeps coming, I don't… I don't know how to stop him. God, what if I can't?
Episode 6: What the hell? I have to pay my rent. I can't be a homeless person with a heart-shaped gem.
Episode 6: I want to keep this demon the fuck out.
Episode 6: God, I just want to be normal.
Episode 6: God, I feel totally useless.
Episode 6: So no, I didn't read the stupid tree! … Shit.
Episode 6: It's like he's fucking haunting me.
Episode 6: What the hell just happened?
Episode 6: I gave up my powers, OK? I got you out of my fucking head.
Episode 6: You can't get in anymore, asshole.
Episode 6: I am nothing special, So why don't you just leave me the fuck alone?
Episode 6: OK, enough uh, emotional bullshit.
Episode 6: Oh my God, are you guys OK?
Episode 7: Holy shit, you're still alive?
Episode 7: What kind of bullshit is that?
Episode 7: Jesus. You have never been to hell, stop acting like an expert. Look, when I got possessed, when I nearly ran off a cliff, when I screwed up and lost my powers, you both helped me.
Episode 7: God, Edwin is my friend too, whether he likes it or not.
Episode 7: God, if you really won't let me go, then I'll find my own way to Hell.
Episode 7: Fucking bullshit, like I can't help.
Episode 7: God, that's fucking insane.
Episode 7: Holy shit, Jenny. You shouldn't be here!
Episode 7: Just cut this shit!
Episode 7: These are mine, asshole.
Episode 7: Oh, bullshit. A good detective does what he has to in order to close the case.
Episode 7: God, I gotta figure out what I'm going to tell her.
Episode 8: Am I ever wrong about this shit?
Episode 8: My parents won't say shit, they don't even--
Episode 8: Jesus Christ! You guys scared me!
Episode 8: God, it's like being punched in the face and the stomach.
Episode 8: Yeah, well blame my parents. Holy shit!
Episode 8: Mom? Oh my God. Mom is that--
Episode 8: Maybe karma is just a bitch.
Episode 8: Oh, my God. Oh, I'm a fucking awful person. Oh, God, I'm the worst.
Episode 8: God, I was a bad person before him.
Episode 8: Because if you did, God, you'd hate me.
Episode 8: Oh my God, Jenny are you OK?
Episode 8: Shit! (digging Niko out of rubble)
Episode 8: Fuck! (Esther has the boys)
Episode 8: Because whatever fucked-up little thing you have going on with Edwin, you must care about him a little.
Episode 8: She probably put a, like, kill-you-instantly spell or some witchy shit on the door.
Episode 8: I am so sorry he was a colossal prick.
Episode 8: Hubris is a bitch, am I right?
Episode 8: I don't have to give up my new fucked-up life while I'm trying to sort out my old fucked-up life.
Notes:
Not Included:
Crystal flips Edwin off in the malt shop in episode 1.
Updated:
Added in top spots for usages of a couple words I missed.
Added in Twitchy Richie for unique usages of the word dick.
Added in a god I missed in episode 2.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
More Dead Boy Detectives Swearing Posts:
Masterlist
Swearing by Episode
Swearing by Character
Swearing by Word
All Swearing Posts
And if you like lists of things like I do, you can check out my other Dead Boy Detectives ones here!
When Charles’ Shirt Colors Change
George Rextrew’s Edwin comic inspo board
Full soundtrack with timestamps
Moves, Incidents, and Cases Masterlist
First pass at finding where the songs in the score are used- full post with timestamps in progress
#dead boy detectives#dbda#dead boy detective agency#crystal palace#crystal palace surname-von Hoverkraft#dead boy detectives swearing#dbda swearing#swearing by character#compiled by me#Dbdshow
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Re: your post about JohnandPaul. If you do wish to share them, I'd love to know your headcanons about John and Paul's feelings for each other. ( I do get your discomfort about sharing though and yeah, I also miss the long discussions and metas from back when Get Back came out. It feels like, except you and some others, most of my favorite blogs have moved on from the fandom)
I've been sitting on this ask for several days now.
First of all I hear you, re:blogs moving on. It's understandable, but it's also sad when my brain does not want to give this stuff up any time soon lol.
In my post I talked about having specific headcanons about their feelings for each other, but the truth is, it's more like I imagine hundreds of very specific somewhat plausible scenarios, while not actually fully buying into any of them.
I always struggle with how sure people are of some definite timeline of McLennon because I just don't see how it's in any way clear: the most compelling evidence that at least John had Those Feelings™ for Paul is stuff he said after the fact (compiled with the stronger case for John being attracted to men in general) – so, if I choose to interpret his words in that way, I'm still not very close to knowing when he developed this attraction. Let alone concluding anything substantial about Paul's feelings.
(And no, I really don't find the two of them saying the other looked good when they met particularly compelling. Appearance plays a huge role in first impressions, regardless of attraction.)
So I guess, it's more that I have open questions I return to again and again, for which I try to construct hypothetical answers that make sense to me. Aside from that bigger timeline question, here's a few more specific ones:
From what I've gathered researching the topic, listening to psychonauts speak about their trips, the acid mindset very much romanticizes all forms of human connection (among other things). I think that's probably what was going on during those "I know."–"I know." sessions John and Paul had on LSD. With that in mind, how might that have mixed in with John trying to understand how he felt about Paul? Could it have confused him? Opened him up to the idea? "Appeased" him for a while? (and again, the answer here would depend on the timeline of feelings in the end)
I still lean towards "Paul is not meaningfully attracted to men" (or at least "Paul valued other aspects of his relationship with John much more than physical attraction") – with that in mind I do kind of ask myself what Paul thought his relationship with John was exactly. Like, I don't pretend it was a standard, run-of-the-mill friendship, so I wonder a lot what his end-goal was, how he saw both of them continuing into later stages of life. The way he talks about the breakup, equating John choosing Yoko with John leaving Paul, speaks to something somewhat true about most couples that marry – but why did he not anticipate that before? What was different? Also, for $20 don't copout with "hurr hurr cause Cyn didn't matter"
Paul's various takes on The John Question continue to puzzle me. On the one hand, it sort of seems to me like Paul would have had enough context clues at the time to get that John was attracted to men, because some of our evidence for it is evidence he would have had access to – he also indicated at least once that John was in fact kind of openly bicurious??? (note: that rant keeps me up at night. Could write a whole thesis on it and also it's so fucking funny) On the other, Paul is pretty insistent that the rumours are Not True and he's not actually the only person to shoot them down like that. (May Pang, Julia Baird, Tony Bramwell, Hunter Davies off the top of my head) It shouldn't be a stretch of the imagination that a man born in the 1940s might have trouble rearranging the image he's made of his dead best friend so drastically (or in a way that might feel drastic to him). So what is it? Is Paul obfuscating the question to protect John's reputation/because he thinks the curiosity is in poor taste or does he genuinely not buy into it? I'm not actually sure whether he's weighed in on this since Yoko's "John Was BI!!!!" reveal. Has this stance developed over the years? And if I assume Paul does know about John's sexuality: does he in fact think John had feelings for him? I do think this is a thing he would never talk about if he did so it feels like there would be no way of knowing either way. But it also makes me wonder about the barriers he might have set up in his head to avoid that very question – because the truth is that if John had Those Feelings™ for Paul and Paul never knew, that's sort of the second-worst case scenario from Paul's perspective, right after John having never liked him in the first place.
AND THEN THERE'S JOHN. Because just because Paul may not have picked up on it, doesn't mean John wasn't putting anything down. But he could also very much have been sending mixed signals from his own end, right? And again, acid mindset + mid 60s Free Love shit: in that culture, how much could John making advances be perhaps taken as Flowery Friendship? Did he justify it to himself that way? Or was John actually violently shoving all of that down? Was he truly capable of that?
It really never ends – I'm not certain of ANYTHING, but give me a proposal (ie. "In My Life is about Paul") and I'll talk myself into circles exploring the ins and outs of that hypothetical.
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ok here we go. some of my 5 star books from the last year or two 🫶🏽
A PLACE FOR US; fatima farheen mirza || contemporary literary fiction. exploration of family dynamics and faith. cannot recommend it enough if u enjoy either of those things in media. it’s one of my favorite books of all time but i do feel a responsibility to say only read it when u have time to sit and cope with it for a while. it WILL leave u a husk of a person! (if u read this and dislike it, you Must lie to me)
TRANSCENDENT KINGDOM; yaa gyasi || contemporary literary fiction. mommy AND daddy issues, dead sibling, arduous relationship with faith, a fair dose of the immigrant experience. not as taxing as the previous rec but definitely still an emotionally heavy read. i need to read it again soon actually i think it’s so stunningly written
BURNT SUGAR; avni doshi || contemporary literary fiction. what can i say about this book. what emotion didnt it make me feel. just the epigraph alone was enough to make me want to drown myself in a vat of acid. the cyclical relationship between mothers and daughters is so fucking sickening and the way it's depicted in this book... my god. i was so miserable reading it and i wouldn’t recommend it anyone who has mommy issues and hasn’t learned how to deal with them. if you dont have mommy issues... you might have them after reading this book who knows. but it’s still 10/10 from me
NINTH HOUSE; leigh bardugo || dark academia, fantasy. loser girl of all time who can see the dead is put in charge of keeping secret societies at yale university in check. a random girl gets murdered and all signs point to one of the societies being responsible. book 3 isnt out yet but it’s sooo yummy u will adore alex she’s my best friend (also has a sexy generationally wealthy white boy. i want to eat him)
THESE VIOLENT DELIGHTS; micah nemerever || dark academia, thriller. definitely one of the crazier books i’ve ever read. batshit insane. two boys develop a delicious friendship that devolves into the worst kind of codependency and results in them murdering someone to make sure they can’t ever replace each other in their lives. gay people can do anything except be normal.
GIOVANNI’S ROOM; james baldwin || classic literary fiction. i don’t think i need to say anything about this. it’s about realizing you don’t know u have a home until you leave it and once you’ve left you can’t ever go home. it’s about isolation—self-inflicted and otherwise. it’s just… everything. everyone should read it. everyone!
HAPPY PLACE; emily henry || contemporary romance. exes who pretend to still be together at their friend group’s annual vacation. i’m not typically a romance novel girl and not everything i’ve read of henry’s has done it for me but this one… i was giggling and twirling my hair. getting flustered and having to take a moment to collect myself. it’s so so good. i do believe it’s miss henry’s best work
THE ROUGHEST DRAFT; austin siegemund-broka & emily wibberley || contemporary romance. cowritten by a married couple about a cowriting duo that hasn’t written together in years. they haven’t spoken since but they’re contractually obligated to put out one more book together. didn’t make me giggle like happy place but i really enjoyed it
seed i love you so very much HELLO!!!! thank you. I've already written all of these down. i cannot wait to dive into their pages.
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2023
Art Klaudt: Getting married
Anonymous 1: stressed and excited about travel outside the country
ava: getting into the band the mars volta
kate: In 2023 my partner moved to a town further from the city for work. In September of that year I decided to move in with him. My apartment for the past couple years before that was my favorite one. It had been only a couple blocks from his mom's house (where he had lived), it was a cheap (for the location) little one bedroom with a fire escape we could sit outside on and nice sunny windows for growing plants. I loved it, it was "my" place. The fact that I had to leave was devastating, and especially because I was leaving it for a shitty little town with no gym or movie theater or good restaurants where nothing was happening and the apartment was bare and ugly with gross green carpet and a nasty bathroom, and not even a tub to soak in. To top it all off, for months I had been looking for a different apartment near the train station that we would both move into so he could move out of the shitty one and I could still get to work downtown. I was doing this essentially alone because he was too focused on work to help. He was too focused on work to help me pack or organize the move, and I had almost signed a lease for a place twice the price when he told me to back out of it because of the smoking/vaping clauses in the lease. It sounds terrible, I know. I'm not making him sound very good, and I was extremely angry at the time, but looking back it was the right thing. We would've been able to afford it but only just barely, and it would've been less space honestly.
Anonymous 2: walking back to the train after a concert. in a lot of pain in my joints but very pleased. meeting someone while waiting for the train back across the river who had also just come from the concert and realizing that we had spoken a few months prior on a dating app
Lucas: Meeting my friend collin prison
Anonymous 3: Throwing up in a dead-end alley between two businesses next to the yard that contained the bins and dumpsters belonging to the restaurant I was working in, mid-way through an evening shift, at Christmas time, because it was so busy and stressful during the shift, and I'd eaten a really big and very dry sandwich really fast on my break and it had got kind of lodged in my chest, so the cause of being sick was both the sandwich and also the stress, and my sick landing on the scrappy weeds that were still growing in that sheltered place even though it was December, and having to go back into work and work the rest of the shift with the acid flavour of sick in my mouth and my throat hurting.
Anonymous 4: The beginning of my first long-term relationship
Anonymous 5: Starting the job I currently have
superswag: date with someone, incel phase
v0w0v: Chainsmoking while drunk in the alleyway outside of my studio apartment. I was one of the only smokers who went outside to do it, and in order to stay away from the ventilation system for the building I would sit on the pavement between the cars parked there, startling dog walkers and passers-by. Once someone asked me to move so he could park his car, and because I was so starved for human contact I rode the high of him smiling at me for the rest of the day. It was a lonely year. Many things got worse.
Anonymous 6: Having a catastrophic psychedelic trip and feeling a guitar riff ring in my head as I met every partner past present in future lie beside me and then vanish into water while I tried to hold them. Deciding I didn't love someone anymore the next day and resolving to stay sober.
Anonymous 7: getting glasses for the first time and seeing trees.
binnie: Emma visiting me in New Jersey, my dad paying for us to stay at airbnbs in Jersey City and New York...Going to the
Anonymous 8: My university graduation and becoming a teacher
April M. Mildew: It's late in the year. I am in a discord call with close friends. It is nice. I am streaming my first playthrough of Portal 2. I have been doing this for a few days now. Discord calls with friends. It has been nice. For a while the days had been too fast and this has been slowing it down. I pray this will last. It does not. Things fall apart, such is life. also for a brief time during this year a friend invited me to a discord server run by the person running this survey. And I saw a bunch of other people who I remembered from years ago on other places on the internet. I realized I had remembered seeing links to that server being posted on tumblr years ago and I was too scared to click on them. The world is very small. It's actually very big, just parts of the internet are small. This does not really belong on this survey.
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This is generally for my cinematic universe where most of my novels take place.
1. The royal family is the government whit its own hierarchy but there are nobelty who make suggestions. So kinda like medival europe
2. Yes there is but you are not suppose to root for them. They are just as evil as the government and they have an even more messed up moral code.
3. Money is a thing but it has basically no meaning for them.
4. Yes. But they are called Gods only sometimes.
5. In every way imaginable that is not being naked. There are certain uniforms or specific clothing for traditional holidays but generally everybody wears whatever.
6. The Angel-Demon civil war
7. The myth of why are angels and demons sworn enemies
8. The dead bodies completely dissolve after 12 days of being dead. The funerals are dependent on the dead's wishes and the gods they worshipped. There is no singular funeral practice.
9. The most common one is a duel to settle disagrrements. If they are done under the rules of a traditional ritual they are completely legal. These duels are not supposed to be fatal.
Additional Note: They have this thing called the Natural Selection what is basically a ceremony on the parh of becoming an adult and a lot of children die in it but I don't know if it is strictly considered murder.
10. Pre-marrital sex is absolutely fine because they don't reproduce via sex and hold marrige to such high importance that a lot of couples with kids or grandkids never even got married.
11. There is no specific beauty standard but youthful and soft features are preferred on both men and women.
12. Dinner. There are a lot of traditions that feature giant feasts at night.
13. There is a celebration of music that is one of their most important yearly holiday. It is held in really high regards but on it's core it is listening to music non-stop for 2 weeks straight while the fortunate use drugs to be more connected with the music. That is for the general public. The really rich gets high and drunk for two weeks straight while listening to said music and/or performing said music. It gets out of hand so wildly that every marrige made during this two weeks is concidered as not legally approved. Also there is no specific date, so if you don't know when it's happening, you can get married and find out only weeks later that it is not recognised because you choose the date wrong.
14. Probably regeneration. That or the poisionus acidic black blood
15. I have multiple but there is more like a system and families ad places than events, so you can have whatever plot.
16. There is this jelly kinda thing made from leftover meat except it is made from human organs and bodyparts. It is a traditional dish but they are only allowed to be made from already dead humans.
17. Maybe my favorite is that there are people who are distrustful around mirrors because Princess Jennyfer was locked in a mirror for tousands of years as a punishment from the king and after being let out she used her already existing connection to mirrors to spy on people and spread rumors turning the saying "even the walls have ears" into a reality.
18. Military. There is a requirement for 2 years of public service but if you do it good they will try and probably succeed in keeping you in the system.
19. My inspiration was elements and concepts that I didn't in stories as a child such as: A system that is matriarhical with the privleged gender being women, why are demons the bad guys and angels the good guys? And why are there no stories where we are supposed to root for the government who is fighting against the rebellion trying to take it down.
Additional Note: For the last one as I got older I understood the reason and changed my story into a more acceptable version of my original idea as I now see it problematic. I'm also trying to change the world building parts that really inforce the gender binary because since then I have made myself more familiar with the concept of being transgender and the concept of gender as a concept.
20. There are laws against violence towards creatures that are lesser beings but they are broken way more than it should be. They are mostly given from difference in culture and socialisation but they do hold stealing a bigger crime than murder. Altrouh it is situational.
Okay, this was really fun! Reading through some of my anwsers I feel like I have to clarify that the main characters are demons. They are also basically unkillable gods that are really violent and grotesc and gory but also tragic.
Their moral code and understanding of the world is wildly different and should not be held to human standards.
And yes, they make really good chacter studies but they also infuriate me.
RED ASK GAME: WRITEBLR: WORLD-BUILDING
CRIMSON - What is the government?
SCARLET - Is there a rebellion?
RUBY - How rich is the population?
GARNET - Are there gods?
CARNELIAN - How do people dress?
POPPY - What historical event does every student learn about?
ROSE - What is the most known myth?
BLOOD - What do the people do with the dead? What are their funerals like?
GORE - What is the most common method of murder? Is it legal?
BLUSH - What are the views on sex before marriage? How strict is it?
LIPSTICK - What is the beauty standard, and how often is it met?
APPLE - What is the most eaten meal?
CHERRY - Describe a celebration!
STRAWBERRY - What was the first thing you created in this world?
RASPBERRY - How does the world support the story you're telling?
POMEGRANITE - Name a food!
JAM - Share your favourite piece of worldbuilding information!
TOMATO - What is the most common occupation? Do the workers enjoy it, or is a requirement?
PEPPER - What inspired this world?
WINE - What is the most broken law?
#ask game#writer#writers#worldbuilding#world building#worldbuilding ask game#world building ask game#writeblr
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Only One Choice, Chapter 5
Read it here on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic
They’re sitting in the car outside her mother’s house, and she’s stalling.
“Are we going inside?” Ethan asks with a confused smile, and she nods wearily.
She’s been dreading telling her family. Well, not her mother; Mom will be thrilled, as will Bill. Charlie will act appropriately happy but doesn’t actually care that much. But Missy….Missy will see right through her. She always does.
They exit the car and make their way to the front porch, her stomach twisting in her gut all the way. Ethan knocks, casting her concerned glances intermittently. She knows she’s not playing the part of “recently engaged” very well. She’s told Ethan that it’s just nerves, and that she hates making big announcements, which is true. She’s still trying to convince herself that’s all it is.
The door swings open and Charlie greets them with smiles and quick hugs, and they make their way to the kitchen where Mom is still finishing up dinner.
“Grab some wine and take a seat,” she directs them as they each kiss her on the cheek, “Missy should be here any minute.”
She pours herself a very full glass of wine after asking Ethan if he can drive home, then plants herself in an armchair that only seats one. She’s been craving personal space lately.
Ten minutes later, Missy breezes in the door, giving Dana a skeptical glance; leave it to Missy to immediately pick up on something being off. They better get this over with soon.
They all sit down and say grace. Missy holds her left hand and she can feel the moment her fingers make contact with the ring. Missy yanks on her arm and gives her wide eyes as everyone else at the table thanks the lord for their daily bread. Dana glances at her briefly and then looks away. It will all be out in the open momentarily.
“Before we dig into this lovely meal Mom has prepared for us,” Ethan begins, “Dana and I have some news to share.”
Oh god, here it comes. Maybe the huge glass of wine was a bad idea.
“Am I gonna be an uncle, D?!” Charlie says excitedly, and both she and Maggie shoot him an unamused glare.
“Not just yet, Charlie,” Ethan says with a cautious smile. “Dana and I got engaged. We’re getting married!”
Dana holds up her left hand with a thin smile, and Maggie and Charlie both provide appropriately big, happy reactions complete with hugs and congratulatory slaps on the back. Missy raises her eyebrows and looks at her baby sister with a bemused expression.
“Oh, this is such happy news, I wish your father could be here,” Maggie says, clutching her hand to her chest. “We’ll have to call Bill and Tara after dinner.”
Dana forces bites of pot roast down her throat and avoids her sister’s eye for the following twenty minutes, then leaves Ethan and her mother to share the news with Bill as she escapes to the back porch. Charlie, as usual, finds his way to the couch with a beer.
She’s sitting on the steps of the porch, working on her second glass of wine, when she hears the creak of the screen door behind her. She doesn't need to look to know that it’s Missy; she can hear the swish of her flowy skirt and the jangle of her stacked bracelets. Missy sits down beside her and they are quiet for a few minutes, the dark night illuminated by a waxing crescent moon.
“Is this really what you want, Sis?” Missy asks in a tone that’s soft and concerned.
“Of course, Missy. Ethan and I have been talking about getting married for years,” she says, hoping it sounds more convincing than it feels.
“I know. But…” she trails off and sighs.
“But what?” Dana prods her.
“Look, Sis, Ethan is great. I love him, and he’ll make a great husband. I’m just not sure he’s the right one for you.” Dana can feel her sister looking at her in the dim light, but keeps her eyes on the blooming hydrangea bush at the bottom of the stairs.
“He’s a great guy, Missy. He’s kind, and generous, and he has a stable job. He treats me really well. There’s no reason NOT to marry him,” she offers, taking a big gulp of her wine. “Dad loved him, he’d be so happy to know we got married,” she adds.
Missy scoffs. “Two years underground and you’re still trying to please Dad?”
“He was cremated, Missy,” she replies deadpan, avoiding the point.
“Okay, so two years underwater, then. Doesn’t change the fact that Dad liking him isn’t a reason to marry someone. Neither is them being great husband material. The only reason to marry someone is because you want to marry them. Do you want to marry Ethan?” She can feel Missy’s eyes on her face.
“Yes,” she says in a weak voice, unwilling to elaborate.
Missy sighs. “Okay, if this is what you want, I’ll be here to help you in whatever way you need. But if you change your mind-”
“-I’m not going to change my mind, Missy,” she cuts her off.
“Well,” Missy continues, “whatever happens, I’ll be here. Thick and thin, right?”
Dana looks at her sister then, and smiles as they clasp hands. “Thick and thin.”
&&
The following week, she takes herself out for Sunday afternoon coffee to one of her favorite places near the apartment. She likes to go out alone for coffee or lunch sometimes, just to have some space to think. Lately, she’s been needing a lot of it. The cafe is bustling with the after-church crowd, which makes her feel guilty for not going to mass with her mother. It’s difficult to talk to Mom right now; all she wants to do is talk about the wedding, and that’s the last thing Dana wants to discuss. Ethan wants to get married soon, this fall, and the whole thing is so overwhelming she shuts down every time they try to talk to her about it. She wishes she could pause life for a while, until she can sort out her feelings.
“Fancy meeting you here,” she hears a familiar voice call from beside her, and she looks up to see Mulder, dressed casually in jeans and a grey T-shirt.
She smiles reflexively, the first time she’s felt a real smile tug at her lips in a week or more.
“Mulder, hi,” she says, genuinely pleased to see him. “What are you doing here?”
“Oh, this place is right near my dealer’s house,” he responds, and flashes her that boyish grin at her shocked expression. “I was actually just checking out a record store around the corner and decided to grab some coffee. How are you?” The question feels so real, like he actually wants to know how she is. She doesn’t want him to leave.
“I’m well, would you like to sit down?” she says as she gestures to the empty seat across from her, pulling her hand back when she realizes that he’ll likely notice her ring. She surreptitiously slips it off her finger and tucks it into her pants pocket.
He sits, and she can’t help but take in the way his shirt hugs his broad shoulders, and the hint of defined pectorals underneath. He is a seriously good-looking man.
“So, whatcha been up to?” He asks, taking a sip from his to-go cup.
She should tell him the happy news that she’s gotten engaged, but she very much doesn’t want to.
“Not much, just cutting up dead bodies and teaching others how to do the same,” she responds dryly.
“Slicin’ and dicin’,” he says with a nod, and she feels a sense of relief at being able to make such a crass joke to someone who understands the kind of work she does.
“Exactly. How about you, working on anything interesting?” she asks, and never has a social nicety been more genuine.
“That depends on your definition of interesting, I suppose,” he begins, “we’ve got the face mutilator, the acid thrower, and the super-stabber, who you’re familiar with.”
“Quite the line up,” she retorts.
“I realize I didn’t get the chance to ask how you ended up at the Academy,” he inquires.
“Oh, um I was actually recruited out of medical school,” she replies, taking a sip of her coffee.
His eyebrows jump and he leans forward a bit. “You’re a doctor, then?” he asks, and she gauges only that he’s impressed, not surprised, which is a nice change of pace. People don’t seem to realize that it’s not a compliment to express disbelief that she, of all people, would be a medical doctor.
“Mmhmm, all pathologists are trained medical doctors,” she confirms with a nod.
“Your parents must be very proud,” he offers, and she makes a face.
“Not exactly. My father actually passed away a couple years ago, but he was less than pleased with my decision not to pursue medicine as a career. My mom is moderately more supportive, thankfully.”
She catches his eye and is surprised by the intensity of the look he’s giving her.
“I’m sorry to hear about your father,” he says as though he knew the man, and it catches her off guard a bit. She changes the subject.
“What about the X files, anything interesting happening there?”
“Well, no, given that they don’t exist anymore. You wanna hear about an old one I investigated?”
She nods emphatically.
“There was this team of researchers up in Icy Cape, Alaska. They were geophysicists, drilling ice core samples. They’d been up there a few weeks when there was an odd video communication received from one of the research team members saying “we are not who we are” before he shot himself in the head, then all communication went dark.”
“What happened to them?” Scully asks, leaning towards him. She’s immediately drawn in.
“Well, that’s what we went up there to find out; myself a physician, toxicologist and a geologist. When we got there, the whole crew was dead, only a dog that belonged to one of them survived. He appeared to be rabid, and he attacked me and our pilot. When we examined the dog, he had these black nodules on his skin.”
“That sounds like a symptom of bubonic plague,” Scully offers.
“That’s what Dr. Hodge thought too. Anyway, the pilot ended up getting infected as well, and we had to restrain him and remove this worm-thing from his neck. He died immediately after we removed it.”
“A worm-thing?” Scully asks, “what was it?”
“I’m still not entirely sure. The geologist found an ice core sample that was probably over 250,000 years old, and I think the worm came from the ice. Some kind of prehistoric parasite that overtakes its host. We eventually figured out that to kill it, you have to introduce a second worm into the host, and they’ll destroy each other.”
“Why haven’t I ever heard about this? It seems like the kind of discovery that would make the news, at least in the science community,” her mind is reeling, now with excitement.
“Well, that’s the thing. After we were evacuated, they destroyed the drill site and all the evidence.”
“They?” she inquires. “Who is ‘they’?”
Mulder smiles knowingly and she has the overwhelming urge to touch him.
“That’s the million dollar question, Scully. That’s what the X files sought to answer. Who, or what, is behind the mass coverup of information that would prove the existence of extraterrestrial life?” He says it so casually, like it’s the most irrefutable fact in the world instead of some half-cocked conspiracy theory.
“Huh,” she sits back in her chair. “Are there a lot of cases like that one? In the X files?”
Mulder’s mouth quirks, and she can tell that he’s pleased by her interest in his old work.
“Hundreds, though I only have about fifty in my possession. I took the juiciest ones, of course.”
“What else is there? Tell me about another one,” she asks unabashedly. She’s fascinated.
Mulder looks at his watch and makes a face. “I wish I could, but I have a prior engagement. I have them stored at my apartment, I could show you sometime, if you’d like. Do you like cats?”
Her eyebrows lift. “Is there an X file about cats?” she asks, and he laughs.
“No. Well, actually yes, but I’m asking because I have a cat. You aren’t allergic, are you?”
“Oh, no,” she says as she feels her cheeks warm.
He reaches into his wallet and hands her his business card. “Give me a call, or shoot me an email. I’ll show you what the FBI doesn’t want you to see,” he punctuates this with a wag of his eyebrows as he stands. “It was really good to see you, Scully,” he says with an earnest look, those eyes seemingly seeing right through her.
She swallows hard. “You too, Mulder,” she replies, and watches him walk out the cafe door.
She looks down at the business card in her hands:
Fox W. Mulder
Criminal Behavioral Analyst
Behavioral Science Unit
She wonders what the W stands for. She wonders why she cares.
#the x files#txf#dana scully#fox mulder#gillovny#msr#sculder#x files#alternate universe#x files fanfic
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temptations
request from nonnie!! “Hi! I loveeee your writing, you’re absolutely amazing! I had a dream recently that i was hoping I could request?? A Georgexreader where they’re dating and the readers love language is touch & affection. Then one day she overhears George saying how irresistible she must find him or something obnoxious like that? So for revenge she completely stops touching him and showing any affection. Maybe a frustrated George in result??? Or something similar? :) Thank you!!”
pairing: george x gryffindor!reader
word count: 3.4k
A/N: this was such an adorable request and one i very much enjoyed writing; i don’t believe i've ever had a request like this one so i was very excited to write it! i didn’t mean for it to be so ~thirsty~ but shoutout to my discord babes -- the thirstiest chat of all has resulted in this story, so thank you! hope you guys enjoy, please leave feedback and reblog if you so please x
tag list: @mintlibri @georgeweasleyx @seppys-return-to-madness @fopdoodledane @fredd-weasley @iprobablyshipit91 @darling-details @laneygthememequeen @lupinsx @keoghans @helloallthethingsilove @waschbiber @dreamer821 @feffffffy @the-hufflepuff-of-221b @62442-am @wtfweasleyy @obsessedwithrandomthings @thoseofgreatambition @harrysweasleys @sleep-i-ness @shadowsinger11 @shadychaoticcollection @haphazardhufflepuff @afriendlyneighborhoodhufflepuff @hood-and-horan @letsfightsomeorcs @theweasleysredhair @purpleskiesstorm @hxfflxpxffs @wand3ringr0s3 @finecole @angelinathebook @highly-acidic @purplefragile @90shermione @zreads @susceptible-but-siriusexual @parker-potters | message me to be added, loves
Being George Weasley’s girlfriend came with loads of things you couldn’t seem to get enough of -- endless laughter, playful teasing, witty banter, consistent hugging. Snogging. Cuddling. Mostly in private, of course, so as not to annoy those around you with your PDA. But there were always small, shared kisses in the corridors, tight embraces after Quidditch matches. Your fingers would interlock with his during feasts, or you’d place your head on his shoulder in the common room. But you tried to save most of this for just the two of you. So the second you were alone, it was pretty difficult to keep your hands off of one another.
Fred was always calling you an “old, married couple”.
But you wondered now, as George slipped his hands under your shirt, spread his hands out against your ribcage, and moaned against your mouth, if old married couples acted like this.
“Love?”
“Mhmm?” you mumbled, barely breaking from him, not even giving him a chance to speak. You locked your arms around his neck and tightened your embrace. He just laughed against you and ran his hands delicately against your skin. It was almost immediate that goosebumps had appeared.
It wasn’t always like this, though. Not in the beginning, at least. You hardly let yourself even hold his hand, worried that you wouldn’t be able to control yourself. You were embarrassed by just how much you craved his touch -- whether it was just his fingers intertwined with yours, or something a little more -- the intensity of your feelings terrified you. You found yourself jolting awake in the middle of the night and swinging your arms to the other side of your bed, only to be disappointed when you realized, in your groggy state, that he was across the common room and not in the bed next to you, with his limbs entangled with yours.
You restricted yourself from feeling too much. What would he say? You didn’t want to scare him. You didn’t want to come off as one of those people, give yourself a bad rep before even really having been able to create one. You also, if you were being honest, found yourself to be a bit worried that if you immediately handed yourself over to him, George would take it, and leave.
But even all this time later, George had proven himself to be a gentleman, and you scolded yourself for ever thinking he could’ve been anything different than exactly that.
He pulled away from you now, squeezing your hips and checking his watch. “We’re going to be late,” he said flatly.
You frowned. “You’re absolutely sure we’ve got to meet Lee in Hogsmeade? Now?”
He laughed at you and began to button the top of his shirt. “Unfortunately, and I mean that truly, darling -- yes, I’m sure we’ve got to meet Lee in Hogsmeade, considering I’ve canceled on him the last three times.”
You groaned. You and George hadn’t really had a ton of alone time the last few weeks, as your studying had increased and your homework piles began to resemble that of mountains -- plus, with excitement of their shop soon opening up, George was busy with Fred, putting the final touches on every single one of their products. It was sheer luck when you both were able to find even five minutes to spend together.
George noticed the change in your expression as you thought on this; he pressed another gentle kiss to your lips and then one to your temple. “Promise to make it up to you later tonight,”
“I’m holding you to that, you know.”
“And if I disobey?”
The words alone set you aflame, but you resisted the very strong urge to pull him back into you. A comment like that would normally send you into a complete and dizzying overdrive. He knew it, too -- the sensual smirk that appeared ever so slightly on his lips told you exactly what he was thinking.
You swatted him playfully with your hand. “Oh shut up, Weasley.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Ugh,” you groaned again while he fell into a bit of laughter. He was always acting like a git. You supposed it was a good thing that he was so cute. You pushed him away from you and jumped off of your bed in the desolate girls’ dormitory. The tension was still hanging in the air; next to you, fixing his tie as if he were off to a business meeting, George just shrugged gently, playing off the entire exchange. You rolled your eyes, “If you’re going to be a prat, then you at least owe me a drink.”
-- -
“Mate, I’m telling you, I must be irresistible to her or something.”
His voice was relaxed, smooth. You stopped dead in your tracks right outside the empty Transfiguration classroom, where Fred and George were both fiddling with their inventions. You wanted to surprise George right after you finished your lesson -- you were dying to get some alone time with him, especially after having spent your disaster of an afternoon in those dreary dungeons with Professor Snape, who’d scolded you due to your potion, which he’d deemed ‘mediocre at best’. But instead, you stopped where you were, leaned closer to the door, and listened.
“Oh yeah?” You could practically hear the smirk that was, no doubt, growing on Fred’s face. He continued with a laugh, “How so? Y/N yanking you into broom cupboards more often than not?”
By the tone of George’s voice, you could imagine exactly how this exchange must have looked: Fred, eyebrows raised and lips formed in a thin smirk as he waited for more information; George, chest puffed and arms folded across it, his air of confidence engulfing the room entirely. “I’m not that much of a prat. Some things I’ve got to keep to myself, haven’t I?” At least he’s being smart, you thought. You appreciated that he at least wasn’t divulging the very intimate details of your relationship to his brother. “All I’ll say is that she can’t keep her hands off of me.”
Both boys ended up snickering like two young kids. You knew it was harmless; they were two of the most genuine blokes you knew -- they meant nothing of it. It was all innocent. But still, you found yourself feeling a bit embarrassed. Your entire body suddenly felt very hot, and not in the way it felt when you were alone with your boyfriend. Was George really going to be that self-righteous? Well, you’d show him, wouldn’t you?
Instead of turning inside the classroom to greet your best mates like you’d planned, you turned on your heel and headed quickly in the direction of your common room, hellbent on making the next few days of George’s life ones he’d certainly never forget.
-- -
You felt different. Strange. Exposed, even. But you reckoned it was worth it if it taught your silly boyfriend a lesson he desperately needed to learn.
You slid yourself next to him on the bench in the Great Hall, but he didn’t look up from his parchment right away, and you didn’t prompt him too. Instead, he finished scribbling something on a bit of parchment, smirked and said, “There’s my favorite girl. How’s your morning?”
You began to pour yourself a bit of tea and mumbled, “Just fine.”
When he looked up, his eyes immediately widened at the sight of you. It was rude of you to do what you were doing, you knew that, but he deserved it after what he said. He deserved it after acting like a git.
You didn’t meet his gaze, but you were quite certain he was eyeing you up and down, something you were used to since you began dating him. But this, you dressing this way -- this was blatant. This was done purposefully. So to feel his eyes wash over you in this moment felt sort of fraudulent. He immediately began to snake his fingers around your waist. “Well good morning to you, too.”
You shrugged him off and giggled slightly. You knew it would work. You knew it as soon as you’d looked at yourself in the mirror this morning -- the exposed strap of your bright red, lace bralette, the tight knot you’d tied at the bottom of your shirt to expose a bit of your skin at your hipline, just above the top of your skirt -- it was just enough to keep you from going too over-the-top and getting into any type of trouble, but enough to get his attention. Enough to make him sweat.
“George, we’re in public!”
“You’re the one who dressed like you want me to rip it all off of you right now.”
“Our professors are literally sat at the other end of the hall. You do know this, yes?”
After you’d wriggled free of his grasp, he figured he’d try something different -- he leant in, pushed a piece of hair behind your ear, and tried to press his lips to your neck, but stopped just before he did so.
“Bloody hell, woman, are you joking? What are you wearing?”
You shrugged casually, as if it didn’t really matter. “Angelina and Katie bought me this perfume for my birthday. Haven’t ever really worn it before. You like it?”
He scoffed a bit, and you knew you had him wrapped around your finger. It was clearly evident in the way he breathed so heavily into your ear. “Like it? Yeah, darling, you could say that,”
Of course he did. He was mad for it. You had worn it once before, actually, on your fourth date. Things had seemed to escalate a bit quickly that evening. You’d then pocketed this perfume for moments when you’d really need it. Today seemed as good a day as any.
“Anyway,” you breathed, grabbing a piece of toast to-go, “have got to run. Want to get there early for my Dark Arts lesson. Meet up with you later?”
You stood up from your spot and swung your bag across your shoulder; George grabbed your wrist gently and pulled you closer to him. “Mmm, think we can sneak away for a bit?”
“You’re sweet,” you replied, bringing a hand to his cheek and stroking his jawline swiftly with your thumb, “but I don’t think so. Have got loads of assignments I’ve to finish tonight -- plus, you and Freddie have to continue working on your products, yeah?”
You turned on your heel and marched out of the hall -- and just as you expected, he was right on your tail. Once you were out in the corridor, George grabbed your hand and twirled you around, a pained expression on his face. Bingo. “What d’you mean ‘I don’t think so’?” He brought his hands to your cheeks and gently caressed your jawline. He teased, “Aren’t getting sick of me, are you?”
Ugh. You were using every ounce of your willpower not to pull him into you; once again, the craving that overtook you felt incredibly intense. You forced yourself to slowly guide yourself away from him. “Sick of you? Of course not, love. I’ve just been thinking -- I’ve been so busy being all over you lately --” you smirked at how rigid his body went at these words, and you continued on sweetly, “--I’ve realized that I really do need to get a handle on some of my assignments, you know? Have got to get my hands off of you at some point, or another.”
You noticed his jaw clench. “Ah -- I see what this is. Heard me and Freddie chatting the other day, did you?” He threw his hands up in surrender, “Alright, I’m a right git, shouldn’t have said it -- I’m sorry, and I love you. Now can I please kiss my girlfriend?”
Just as he leant in, the bell rang out, signaling five minutes until the start of the first lesson. George groaned very audibly, earning himself looks from passersby. He threw his hands into his pockets and leant against the wall, looking grouchy. You giggled to yourself and pulled your cardigan tighter around your shoulders. “You don’t need to apologize.” You inched closer toward him, ran a hand through his bright red hair, and whispered, just barely grazing his lips, “I love you, too.”
And you swept yourself down the corridor and into your Dark Arts classroom without an embrace, without a snog, without anything, and you were most certain (and proud) that you’d left the most cheeky boy in the entire school completely and utterly breathless.
-- -
It had only been six hours since George was knocked off balance at the sight of you -- but without the hand holding, the embraces, the kisses against your skin -- to him, it felt like bloody weeks.
He supposed, as he watched you practice non-verbal spells and earn yourself tons of praise from Professor Flitwick, that he probably shouldn’t have said what he’d said to his brother. He was just teasing, anyway. He knew he didn’t hurt your feelings -- you had thick skin, thicker than him, even. But apparently he’d poked you enough that you now wanted to poke back, and he was paying the price for it.
When he tried on his own to work on some non-verbal spells and failed miserably, Fred began to laugh quite haughtily. “Not feeling frustrated, are we, George?”
George knew what he meant -- not frustrated about spells, of course. But about other things. He hadn’t realized how much he craved your touch, too, until he couldn’t have it. Until you began withholding it just this morning. He wondered how long he could really last. He found himself getting lost in his thoughts, and his mind almost always wandered to his dormitory, you pinned beneath him giggling like mad, him pressing kisses to your neck. The temptation circulating through his veins was strong. He really needed to snap the hell out of it.
Fred, still laughing, groaned in pain after earning himself a nice elbow jab to the ribs from George.
But it wasn’t just the snogging, or being alone with you with his hands wound tightly around your waist. He missed the small things, like being able to hold your hand in the corridors, gently placing his fingers on the small of your back to guide and steady you through the portrait hole, being able to run his hands through your hair when he was sat next to you during lessons. He missed all of that, and it hadn’t even been one bloody day!
You’d said something to him when you’d first started dating, something about love languages. He didn’t really know much about it, but he found himself becoming incredibly intrigued when you’d begun explaining it. You’d been perched against a tree near the Black Lake, practicing simple Charms as you’d studied for your upcoming exams.
“Sorry -- a what?”
“Your love language,” you’d said casually, adjusting yourself in his arms. You’d explained to him that each person’s love language was what they craved most in a relationship. George didn’t really know his, but he’d been excited to find out. You told him yours was touch and affirmation.
“Oh,” he’d laughed, beginning to tickle you near your stomach, “you mean like this?”
You’d both spent the rest of the afternoon on the grounds, discussing things and snuggling closer together. That was the very first time Fred had referred to you both as an old, married couple. George never let on to how very much he enjoyed that. It was then decided, after much conversation, that George’s top love language seemed to be words of affirmation. Or, so he thought.
But now, leaving Charms, as you wiggled your fingers at him and fled down the opposite end of the corridor to your next lesson, he reckoned he was probably wrong.
Maybe his love language was physical touch, too.
-- -
You were struggling to make it through the week, to say the least. Dramatic, yes, but true. You couldn’t believe this bloody plan of yours -- you should’ve just ignored the comment and carried on as usual, because you today’s lessons felt like an entire month’s worth.
Hopefully George would learn his lesson soon, so you could tug him away and snog him for hours again without him making some silly, childish comment.
Apparently, he was feeling the same way, because at the end of the day, you found him poring over a bit of parchment in the common room, looking positively woebegone.
You two hadn’t embraced, kissed, held hands or anything of the like in nearly seven days. To say you were both going mad was a severe understatement.
He pulled at his hair, looking incredibly frustrated. But his facial expression softened when he looked up and saw you -- his eyes lightened and his face flushed pink, and his smile was relatively bright for someone who looked absolutely exhausted.
“Hi,” he said, not getting up from the armchair.
“Hi,” you echoed him, taking a place on the couch across from him.
The whole layout of the scene was rather dramatic.
“How were the rest of your lessons?”
“Just fine. And yours?”
You were both making silly, stupid small talk, but it was obvious to you both (and the world) that all you wanted to do was kiss one another. Which was normal, wasn’t it? And what was more worth it, you thought -- that, or your bloody pride?
“This is killing me, you know.”
You crossed your arms and smirked at him. He flung his parchment onto the table and made his way toward you. He placed himself down next to you -- not close enough to touch, but closer than you’d both been all day. He let his head fall back dramatically onto the couch and grinned at you. “Glad you’re learning your lesson.”
“Don’t tell me you don’t miss it.”
“Dunno,” you said sarcastically, fiddling with the edge of your skirt, “maybe you’re not as irresistible as you think.”
He groaned and rolled his eyes. He inched closer to you, though. “That’s mean.”
“Maybe it’s what you deserve.”
An evil sort of smirk tugged at the edges of your lips, and he playfully went to poke you in your ribcage, but stopped himself. You both laughed a bit, and he took a deep breath, and started. “I was a git.”
“Yeah,” you replied flatly, “but, to make it up to me, you’ve now got to endure massive amounts of teasing in the foreseeable future.”
Slowly, trying to read your expression, he reached out and began running his pointer finger along the arm of your cardigan -- the most touch you two had seen in days. It sent a spark through your entire body. Again, dramatic, but truthful. He let his hand fall next to yours, both of your pinky fingers touching ever so slightly. “You know,” he began, tracing light circles on your hand, “you’re pretty irresistible, too. Even without all of this going on.” You knew what he meant. The bralette strap, the exposed skin, the lipstick you’d been putting on, the perfume you’d been wearing. The withholding of everything he so desired. “I love you just the way you are.”
His voice had never sounded genuine, and you allowed yourself to gently jab him in the stomach, earning yourself laughs from him. “Wow, Georgie, going soft on me? That was the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.”
He frowned at you dramatically.
“Told you -- teasing in the foreseeable future. ‘m going to take what I can get, love.”
You guessed that he took your sweet smile as an opening, because he reached out and ran a hand through your hair. “Can I bloody kiss you now?”
A sigh of relief escaped the both of you. “Yes,” you said, leaning in. But before his lips touched yours, you pulled away, bit your bottom lip, and wiggled your eyebrows at him. “Irresistible, huh?”
“Never going to hear the end of that one, am I?”
“Nope.”
You felt revitalized when he pressed his lips to yours; sure, it had only been a week or so, but a week too bloody long. You loved the feeling of his hands wound around the back of your neck, the way your fingers danced delicately on his chest or in his hair. How you two had managed this long was beyond you, but you were glad this was over.
Just then, Fred and a few others hopped through the portrait hole and waved to the two of you. Fred noticed how close together you were, rolled his eyes teasingly, and called, “There’s the old, married couple. Things back to normal now, I reckon?”
George swiped his thumb across your cheek and pulled you into him. But you had other ideas. Cheekily, you winked at your boyfriend and called to your best mate, “Oi, Freddie! You’ll never guess what George just said about me.”
#george weasley#fred weasley#fred and george weasley#weasley twins#george weasley x reader#george weasley reader insert#george weasley imagine#george weasley fanfiction#george weasley fanfic#weasley twins imagine#weasley twins fanfic#weasley twins fanfiction#hp fanfic#hp fanfiction#hp imagines
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you’re out
Pairing: Joe Mazzello x Fem!Reader
Summary: Your favorite past time is roasting Joe about how much the Yankees suck. So, when you go to a Yankees game with him and make a bet about whether they’ll win or not, you can’t help but hope that maybe, just maybe, they’ll win so Joe can do whatever he wants to you.
Word Count: 5K
Warnings: SMUT (don’t interact if you’re under 18 please!), swearing, mentions of alcohol, continuous talk of how much the Yankees suck (they do, I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules!!!!).
A/N: Hello, hi, hey, anyone else bummed there isn’t any baseball to watch?? No?? Just me?? Alright, well, have soft, baseball loving Joe to fill the void in your heart. (and once again, thank you to @diasimar, @fairestkillerqueenofall and @mrhoemazzello for their contributions and for being in horny/yearning hell with me all day every day)
💖As always, likes, reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💖
"NO!"
"HA! See, that's why the Sox are the best team in the league right now and the Yankees, well, the Yankees, they suck." She took a long pull of beer as Joe’s string of curses were muffled by the material of his Yankees cap.
Slapping him on the back, she raised her hand to get the bartenders attention. Her friend, Dylan, nodded back and slid two tequila shots down the bar toward them, not even bothering to hide their laughter at Joe, who had fully slumped over the bar and was letting his forehead bounce lightly against the wood.
Pushing one liquid gold shot toward Joe, she pulled her own closer, watching a droplet of water fall over the edge of the lime's rind into the glass.
"C'mon Mazzello. Buck up. It's just the Yankees fifth loss of the season. Which means they’ve secured their status as the most suck-tastic team in the MLB." Smirking, she threw her shot back, quickly bringing the lime to her mouth and biting down on soft flesh, the sting of acidity biting back as she licked her lips, making sure she got every bit of salt from them.
Watching (Y/N) lick her lips was the only thing that was enough to make Joe stop feeling sorry for himself and start feeling a different emotion.
"Can't you have some sympathy for a mourning man? I'm dying over here. I'm slowly being killed by the thing I love most." He wasn't quite sure if he was referring to the Yankees or the more than friends feelings that he'd had for (Y/N) since the moment he’d met her.
And her boyfriend.
But the boyfriend was out of the picture (She'd swanned into his apartment one day, already monologuing, "So, I dumped Mitch. He told me once we got 'serious', my career would need to take a back seat so I left him, and our relationship, in the back seat of the Uber we were in.") and Joe felt like he needed to take his chance before someone else came into the picture.
Laughing, she reached her hand up to the Sox cap she wore, twisting it around so the brim was facing towards the back.
Joe almost choked at the action.
"Joe, if you don't take that shot right now I'm calling the cops because I'm pretty sure that's alcohol abuse to leave a perfectly good free shot sitting in front of you." Dylan raised an eyebrow as they finished wiping down the last glass they had pulled from the crate they'd brought from the kitchen.
Ripping his gaze from (Y/N)'s form, he hurriedly threw it back, scrunching his face up in an exaggerated fashion as the burn of the alcohol streaked down his throat and warmed his stomach. Popping the whole lime slice in his mouth he heard her laugh,
"Joe! God, how many times do I have to tell you that you don't have to put the whole lime in your mouth?"
"When you stop laughing every time I do it." He admitted as he delicately placed the mangled husk of said lime on his napkin. Dylan shuddered as they touched the very edge of Joe's napkin to let it fall into the trash can behind the bar.
Shaking her head, she swiveled in her chair to face Joe, "So. I have a proposition."
Please let it be that she things we should be together forever and get married. Or that she proposition me for sex. Either one.
"You know how I scored those tickets to the Yankee's/Sox's game for next week?"
Shaking himself from the imagery of shoving a piece of wedding cake in (Y/N)'s face, Joe nodded, taking another gulp of beer.
"Well....since you're my best friend who I love dearly," she placed a hand on his thigh, smiling, and Joe knew he would do whatever she wanted.
"I was thinking we could make it extra interesting." Her heart was racing at just the small action she had accomplished. Feeling Joe's thigh muscle tighten as she laid her hand on it made something deep in the pit of her stomach tighten as well.
Since she'd broken up with Mitch it freed her up to do things she'd always wanted to do. To focus on her career, her friendships, herself and on the fact that she wanted her best friend, Joe Mazzello, to absolutely wreck her in the bedroom.
The first time she'd envisioned it, she'd almost drained the new pair of batteries she'd put in her vibrator and since then she'd been falling without a parachute. The only thing that kept her from ripping the cord was the fact he was her best friend. They spent all their time together, what if it went wrong? It was a silly fear, she knew if anything were to happen they’d work through it like they always did, but it still bugged her that something so trivial was stopping her from potentially jumping into the best relationship she'd ever had.
Besides, she'd do anything for Joe and she knew he’d do anything for her. They'd picked each other up from the airport, taken care of each other when they were sick or hungover and once Joe had plant sitted for her.
(The key word there being once. She'd come back to all of them dead. "Joe...they're succulents. How do you kill those?")
She was nervous the fantasies she'd cooked up in her head would never live up to the reality that was in front of her, but recently she'd noticed little things that were starting to embolden her.
Lingering gazes, holding on for a second too long during hugs. Once, it had been late, and they'd pulled apart from a hug only for their eyes to lock. Her breath caught as the thought oh god it's actually happening flitted through her mind, but Joe just gave her a gentle nudge toward the door urging her to get into bed as soon as possible.
But, she was nervous that she was reading too much into these signs.
If (Y/N) had been able to read minds she would have been very confused to see Gwil in his "I Want To Break Free" get up but it was Joe's surefire way to get rid of an erection and with (Y/N)'s hand so close on his thigh, he knew he needed to do something desperate to settle himself down.
Bringing herself back to the feel of Joe's thigh under her hand, she peered up at him through her eyelashes and shot him a smile, "I think we should place a bet."
"A bet?"
"Yes, Joseph. A wager. On this ball game."
"Alright, what are the terms?" Joe leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. Her eyes were immediately drawn to the way the sleeves of his t-shirt stretched against his biceps. She swore he bought his shirts a size too small just to fuck with her.
"Well, if the Yankees lose, which they will because they suck," Joe made an indignant noise in the back of his throat, "then you have to do anything I want."
Joe's eyebrows almost shot into his hairline, "And if the Sox’s lose? Which they will," he declared pointing a finger in (Y/N)'s face, causing her to lean back in her chair, batting his finger out of her face, "then you have to do anything I want." Crossing his arms behind his head he settled back into his chair, smug smile firmly planted.
"It's so on, Mazzello." She declared as she stuck her hand out for him to shake. As his hand slid into hers, she could have sworn they both held on for a beat longer than was absolutely necessary.
~~~
In (Y/N)'s opinion it wasn't really summer till she went to a baseball game. The artificial green of the grass, the sun shining down, the crack of a baseball hitting a bat. There wasn't a scent more intoxicating than that of popcorn, hot dogs and cheap beer.
Which was probably why Joe had sent some serious side eye her way as she filled her lungs and drank in the scene before her, settling into their seats, hands clasped around flimsy plastic cups filled with overpriced alcohol.
"What? You don't love the smell of a ball game?" she shot him an incredulous look.
"No, I do. But I don't try to inhale the whole stadium through my nostrils."
Reaching a hand around she knocked his Yankees hat off his head, laughing as he scrambled to pick it up and jam it back on his head. Turning, she saw he had his best scowl prepped as he glared at her,
"How dare you try to knock the best good luck charm the Yankees have off my head?"
"Because I need my bathroom cleaned and I want you to do it." she shrugged as she took a sip of what was mostly foam. Gotta love baseball beer.
"I can't even be that mad at you because you did bring me to a baseball game that my team is going to whoop your teams ass in so, thanks, (Y/N)." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, bringing her into his side as she leaned a head against him, smiling and wanting to stay in that position for as long as possible.
"Oh, you two are just the cutest couple! Reminds me of myself and Harold at our first baseball game."
Both their heads turned in perfect unison to look at the form of a woman cautiously making her way down the stairs, cane in one hand, her grandson holding her other arm and mouthing I'm sorry at them over her head.
Laughing self-consciously, (Y/N) started to disentangle herself from Joe's embrace, "Oh. Ah. That's really not-"
"Thank you ma'am, that's really sweet of you. Were you and Harold married a long time?" Joe interjected, keeping his arm firmly wrapped around (Y/N)'s shoulders.
Stopping in the middle of the aisle, the woman’s eyes grew soft, "Oh yes. We were friends for the longest time until finally one day he kissed me on the cheek. I remember I turned to him as he turned bright red and looked ready to melt into the floor. But I just told him 'It's about damn time!' And planted one on him myself." She laughed at the memory as her grandson rolled his eyes,
"C'mon Grandma. Let's get to our seats. The first pitch is gonna be thrown soon."
Waving goodbye, they watched the woman toddle down the stairs. Lifting one thigh and then the other, (Y/N) felt her skin unstick and prayed to god she wouldn't have butt sweat once this thing was over.
"That's cute. But also it sounds like she was a huge hussy back in her day."
Snorting, she slapped Joe in the chest, "Really, Joey? You're going to call a sweet old lady a hussy for sharing a cute story about her and her husband?"
"I'm just calling 'em like I see 'em!"
"And that old woman is a hussy?"
"She's the one throwing herself at men!" Joe protested as he tried to hold back his laughter. Soon, they both were laughing so hard no noise was coming out, just their whole bodies shaking with mirth.
"Okay, okay...oh my god. I will give her credit, that's a very sweet story." (Y/N) admitted as she leaned back in her seat, adjusting her own lucky Sox hat.
"It is. I've always liked being friends with someone first before dating them." Joe admitted as he slid his eyes over to meet (Y/N)'s. Staring back at him, she felt her heart stop as his gaze burned into hers. Nodding, she mumbled, "Yeah, me too."
His lips twitched upward as he broke the gaze and leaned back in his seat, throwing one arm over the back of her chair and propping his foot up on the seat in front of him, "I think it's gonna be a great ball game."
She could only nod mutely as she tried to pick up the scattered fragments of her thoughts.
~
"C'mon. Go. GO. GOGOGO. DROP IT...AHH FUCK." Her head dropped into her hands. She was so sure that the hit the last batter had was going to be the one that got the Sox the win but the Yankees outfielder had just managed to snag it.
Beside her, Joe was on his feet, pumping his fists in the air and cheering along with every other Yankees fan in the stadium causing the floor to rumble underneath her Converse.
"C'mon (Y/N), you're missing the best part!" Joe laughed as he tugged on the back of her shirt. Lifting her head up she was met with confetti raining from the sky and Frank Sinatra crooning "New York, New York" over the stadium speakers as the crowd started to flood out of the ball park.
"You're an insufferable bastard."
"Yeah but I'm your insufferable bastard." Joe cooed as he patted her head, snickering as she rolled her eyes and dodged out from underneath his patronizing hand.
"Whatever, Mazzello. Let's head out." Pulling her phone from her pocket to call a ride, her brain was already going a million miles an hour, thinking about what Joe would possibly make her do. Just the kind of thoughts she was having were causing her to shift in place, trying to find some relief for the ache that was building between her thighs.
Joe was consumed by his own thoughts at the opportunity before him. He didn't want to make (Y/N) do anything she didn't want to do but at the same time...he wanted to kiss her. He'd almost been disappointed that the kiss cam hadn't landed on them.
Both of them were lost in their own world and as such didn't realize that the herd moving to exit the stadium had stopped which caused Joe to run into someone which made (Y/N) bump into Joe with an "Oof"
Reaching an arm back, he wrapped his hand around her arm, steadying her as she tottered on the balls of her feet.
"Without even looking back, that's impressive."
"What can I say? I'm an impressive sort of guy." (Y/N)'s breath caught in her throat considering what else about Joe was impressive but immediately snapped out of it when he turned to face her over his shoulder and waggled his eyebrows up and down.
Rolling her eyes, she shoved him forward, "Let's just get home so I can sooth my wounds with booze and maybe some leftover Chinese."
"Wait, but we had Chinese at my place, none of it is at yours." Joe wrinkled his brow.
"I know, that's why we're going over to your place. You have all the good food and booze." She shrugged as they pushed through the gates and walked to the bus that would take them home.
"You always say that and then I run out of food and have to buy more. Why can't you ever have the good food and booze?" he grumbled.
"Because I can't afford to have you eating and drinking all my stuff."
~~~
Shoving his door open, they fell into Joe's apartment, letting the artificial coolness of air conditioning wrap itself around them. Both of them letting out involuntary sighs at how good it felt after being crammed onto a hot bus with more warm bodies than seats.
"Time to munch..." (Y/N) clapped her hands together before she opened the door of Joe's fridge and pulled out a Chinese takeout container, popping it open, mouth watering instantly at the sight of the golden dumplings waiting for her, like little doughy presents.
Before she could even grab a fork, Joe's hand wrapped around the container, whipping it up and over her head, causing her to turn in place so she was witness to Joe shoving a dumpling in his mouth, "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I not tell you? Dumplings are for winners." He said through a mouthful of her dumplings.
"You're the meanest person in the whole world." She declared as she turned her back on him to rummage around in his fridge, only to emerge with two beers in her fist.
Joe couldn't help but admire how she looked in his kitchen. He couldn't help but think what it would be like to cook with her. Or cook for her. Having her sitting on the counter as he made her a home cooked meal, stealing kisses in between stirring and chopping, making small talk, kidding around with each other, he wanted that so badly he felt his heart seize with longing.
"Well, I guess we can't put it off any longer." She sighed as she slowly placed the beers on the counter. The look on her face was so melancholy, Joe put down the takeout box and felt his heart leap up into his throat, "What do you mean?"
"I mean the bet. I lost. Which, I would like to point out, how brave I am for admitting that without retching," Joe rolled his eyes, "But I get to do anything you want me to do so, hit me Joe. What do you want me to do?"
Peering up at him through her eyelashes she searched his face, hoping against all hope that he would say "get on your knees" or "get into my bedroom". She knew that was wishful thinking on her part but she couldn't help it. Watching his Adam's apple bob up and down as he took a huge swallow, she almost didn't hear what he muttered next,
"Want you to kiss me."
Her eyes shot up to his.
"I mean, only if you want to. I don't want you to do anything you're uncomfortable with but, fuck, (Y/N), I've wanted to kiss you since I first met you and I don't know, it feels like there's been something more between us lately and I didn't want to hate myself forever for not just, going for it, so, if you want, I'd really like it if you kissed me." He ended this speech with a shrug, fiddling with his fingers.
"Joey," she breathed out and Joe's form stiffened as he waited for her rejection,
"I've waited for you to ask me that for so long." she admitted, almost laughing at how wide Joe's eyes became.
Blinking he stepped forward, "Then get over here and kiss me."
Eyes widening, she stepped up to Joe, their arms hanging at their sides as they contemplated each other. Unsure, she tilted her head up. Joe leaned his head down, lips ghosting over hers as he whispered, "Are you sure?"
She just nodded and felt her heart clench as a smirk grew over Joe's face.
Reaching a hand up, he cupped her cheek, letting his thumb stroke over the soft skin. Closing the gap between them, he placed his lips against hers, gently. Not enough to really count as a true kiss, his last ditch attempt to give her an out if she wanted.
The electricity zipping through her body let her know that this was meant to happen.
Letting out a small moan, she reached her arms up to wrap around Joe's neck, dragging him down more fully against her lips. Twining his arms around her waist, he pulled her flush against him. Feeling her soft curves fit up against him in the most delicious way possible.
Deepening the kiss, he nudged her back toward the counter. She made a small noise in the back of her throat as her back hit the edge.
"Jump," Joe breathed and she did what she was told, leaping up onto the counter, spreading her legs as Joe stepped between them, running his hands up and down her thighs, giving them a squeeze when he reached where she wanted him most.
"Such a good girl taking my directions." he breathed into her mouth. Her head dropped back as she let out a groan. Joe smiled at the effect.
"You're gonna ruin me, Joe." she laughed weakly as one of her hands intertwined with one of Joe's.
"That's the plan, darling" he said devilishly, bringing his other hand to the back of her head, pulling her down to reconnect their lips. She cupped Joe's face with both of her hands, giving her all to the kiss. Letting all of her pent up want and need spill through her lips and tumble into Joe's heart.
Letting his tongue slip through her lips, he explored her mouth. She gripped his shoulders as she wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him flush against the counter. Chuckling, he twined his fingers through her hair, giving it a gentle tug as he felt her body become pliable at the sensation.
"So, you like having your hair pulled, huh?" He murmured as she mewled, scooting her hips closer to the edge of the counter, wanting nothing more than to grind her core against something, anything to relieve the ache that was building in her.
"Mmm and you're a needy little thing too." he cooed as his hands ghosted down her body, outlining her curves. Nodding ferociously, she drapped her arms around his neck, pressing her lips to his again as he gave her hips a squeeze.
"Joe!" the yelp that came from her mouth was louder than she intended but she hadn't been prepared for Joe's arms to lift her from the counter and carry her into the bedroom. Feeling his chest rumble against hers she smiled, "I got you. Don't worry."
"I know. You've always had me." she breathed into his ear and Joe had to bury his head into her hair to keep from letting the enjoyment he felt hearing that shine too strongly through his face.
Lifting his head from her soft waves, he gently laid her on the bed groaning when she stretched her whole body and smiled up at him, "Aren't you going to ravish me now?" she fluttered her eyelashes at him and felt her pulse quicken as Joe started unbuckling his jeans.
"Sweetheart, I'm going to make sure every inch of you is screaming with pleasure." Eyes widening, she started to fumble with the buckle of her belt as Joe chuckled, "I, uh, kind of wanted to be the one who did that." Lifting her eyes she saw the blush in his cheeks and smiled, "Then come here and get into these pants, Mazzello."
He pounced on top of her so quickly she wasn't even sure how it happened. His fingers making quick work of her belt and shimmying her shorts down her legs.
"God, you're gorgeous." Joe's eyes shone as he drank her form in. When he got to her head his lips quirked up, "You're gonna have to lose the hat, babe. Besides, if anything you should be wearing the hat of winners." he joked as she rolled her eyes. Then, a wicked idea overcame her.
Rising up on her knees, she placed her hands on Joe's shoulders to breath into his ear, "You mean like this hat?" Grabbing the hat Joe was still wearing, she flung her Sox hat to the floor and replaced it with his well-work Yankees hat.
Seeing (Y/N) wearing that hat caused Joe's cock to twitch in his boxers and he let out a soft whine as she placed a hand on his thigh, "Do you want to fuck me in your Yankees hat, Joey?"
"God, yes. I don't care how stereotypically male that makes me but, fuck, (Y/N), yes." his hands came up to her face, pulling her into a deep kiss that was interrupted by his moan as her hand started palming him through his boxers.
"Fuuuck (Y/N)" he breathed out as his head fell against her shoulder. Smiling she kissed his neck as she tugged at the band of his briefs, "I want these off"
Again, it seemed like Joe moved so fast she wasn't sure how it happened. In the blink of an eye he was laying on her bed, briefs off, shirt off and beckoning her closer with one finger, his eyes never leaving hers.
Smirking, she crawled over to Joe. Straddling him, she reached for the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head, being careful not to mess up the hat that was positioned on her head. Joe smirked at the action but his jaw quickly dropped when he saw her. Her pink bra and floral panties somehow making the hat on her head even filthier.
She felt his cock twitch underneath her heat and groaned at the contact. Leaning forward she pressed a kiss to Joe's lips then slowly started kissing his neck, down his chest and finally to his thighs where she most wanted to be.
Biting his hips, Joe finally hissed "(Y/N), please, wanted this for so long..." Taking pity on him, she wrapped her lips around the tip of his cock and started working him over. The way Joe threw his head back and groaned was all the praise she needed.
Even though, as she bobbed her head up and down, Joe was heavy on the praise, "Such a good girl, making me feel so good, babe. God, don't stop..." when she took his entire length in her mouth, she felt Joe tug on her arm, bringing her back up to his lips, he kissed her deeply.
"My turn," he murmured as he pressed her down into the bed. Smiling, she snuggled down into the pillows behind her and sighed as Joe pressed kisses all over her tits, reaching his hands behind her and making quick work of her bra.
She ripped it from her body and threw it to the floor as Joe danced his hands down to her cunt.
Stroking the inside of her thigh softly, dragging his fingers closer and closer to her entrance she whined, "Joe..." lifting his head from her chest, he smiled,
"What? Not moving fast enough for you?" She nodded frantically and Joe's eyes never left hers as he moved a finger to run up and down her folds.
With a gasp she threw her head back and Joe growled, "Shit baby, you're soaked. Who did this to you?"
"You...you did Joey. You always make me this wet."
"Always, huh? I think I'd remember if we hooked up before this." he smirked.
"Every time I touch myself I imagine you doing it..." she murmured as she bucked her hips up to get his fingers closer to her entrance which meant she missed how comically wide Joe's eyes got and was caught off guard when he planted another kiss on her lips.
"Those are the hottest words I could ever hear come from your mouth." she breathed out a laugh and then she felt her eyes rolling into the back of her head as Joe slowly inserted two fingers into her cunt.
"F-fuck Joe, that feels so good..." Her voice trailed off as Joe started pumping his fingers into her slowly, relishing in the feel of the walls of her pussy tightening as he sought out the one spot that would make her lose her mind. After a particularly deep thrust that had her eyes rolling into the back of her head Joe leaned down to kiss her neck.
Speeding up his fingers she felt her cunt clench, between his fingers and the way he was kissing on her neck, she knew was going to cum soon.
"Joe...I-I'm gonna cum"
"Good, want you to. Want you to cum around my fingers and then around my cock. Think you can do that for me, sweetheart? Want to feel how good I make you.”
Making a whining noise in her throat she reached a hand up to the back of Joe's neck to reconnect her lips with his.
Pumping his fingers in and out of her he started to swirl his thumb over her clit and she moaned into his mouth, "Fuuuuck, Joe, don't stop"
"Wasn't planning on it" he chuckled into her mouth as he felt how close she was. Pressing more firmly on her clit, (Y/N) saw stars and she didn't even have time to warn Joe before the waves of her orgasm crashed over her.
As she came down, she was aware of tightly she was gripping onto Joe's hair and let go with an apology.
"Never apologize for pulling my hair when I make you cum like that. Truly, it's a small price to pay to see someone as beautiful as you cum because of me." Blushing, she reached her hands down to shimmy her panties down her legs and throw them into her room.
Grabbing her hand, he gave it a kiss and they stared deep into each others eyes, she reached a hand down, brought his fingers up to her mouth and licked them clean of her juices, keeping direct eye contact the whole time.
Joe's eyes darkened, "I need to fuck you. Now."
"What are you waiting for then? Please fuck me, Joe." she cooed as she brought his fingers out of her mouth with a pop. Reaching her hand down, she pumped his cock a few times as Joe growled.
Batting her hand away, he guided his cock to the entrance of her cunt, swiping it up and down her folds, "God, there's nothing hotter than getting my cock wet with your own juices, baby girl."
"Fuuuuuck, Joe" she whined as she brought her hands up to rest on his biceps, squeezing them and laughing when she felt him flex, "Did you just purposefully flex?"
Winking at her he pushed himself fully inside. Giving them both a minute to adjust, he brought his forehead down to rest on hers. Both of them closing their eyes and breathing each other in, it was the most vulnerable moment they'd shared with each other.
This one moment, where they were closer than they had ever been, it felt so right they couldn't quite believe that in a city of thousands, they fit perfectly together.
"Joe?"
"Yeah, sweetheart?"
"If you don't move soon I'm gonna be pissed."
Laughing, he kissed her nose and started to thrust. Throwing her head back, she let out a string of curses as her hands clutched the sheets, feeling the walls of her cunt clench around Joe's length.
"Fucking hell, feel better than I ever imagined."
"You feel a hell of a lot better than my vibrator" she choked out as Joe let out a single bark of laughter, thrusting harder. He lifted her legs so they were over his shoulders, enjoying how the new angle let him get deeper inside her, and by the way (Y/N) had started babbling about how close she was, he had a pretty good idea it felt amazing for her as well.
"Fuck, Joe. Rub my clit. I'm so close. Again..." a moan swallowing the rest of her sentence as Joe started rubbing her clit.
Seeing her writhe underneath him, knowing he was the cause of her pleasure and the fact that this was all happening while she was wearing his Yankees cap was almost too much for Joe.
"Sweetheart, I'm close.." he choked out as (Y/N) nodded, "Me too, want to cum with you..." she murmured and Joe nodded, thrusting harder as she brought a hand up to tweak her nipples.
Pressing more firmly into her clit, (Y/N) felt her pleasure overtaking her body and succumbed to the orgasm that swept over her. Feeling her walls clench around his cock was the final push Joe needed. With a final groan, he filled her with his love, taking a minute to catch his breath.
When they finally both opened their eyes they burst into giggles,
"Hey."
"Hi" Joe breathed out as he tweaked her nose
Scrunching her nose, she reached her head up to press a gentle kiss to Joe's lips. Pulling himself from her, they both moaned at the loss of contact and after cleaning them up, he crawled into bed next to her, pulling her into his arms.
"God, that was...amazing"
"And long overdue in my personal opinion."
"Yeah, ya think?" he pressed a kiss to the top of her head then pulled back with a disgusted noise.
"What? Does my hair smell bad? Do I have lice or something?" pulling back she looked up into Joe's eyes.
"No, this hat smells nasty. I can't believe you wore it when we had sex, who would do that?"
"Don't lie, it was the one final push you needed to cum, yeah?"
"I don't have to admit anything to you" he sniffed as she curled up into his arms.
Nuzzling into his chest, she placed a soft kiss right on top of his heart. Humming, he drew her in closer, closing his eyes and locking into his memory how it felt to hold her in his arms.
His eyes snapped open, “Wait, hold on,” he jumped up, ignoring her protests as he rummaged around on the floor.
“Joe, c’mon, come back and snuggle.” Pouting she turned only to be met with the lens of Joe’s camera focused on her.
“JOE! I’m NAKED! What is your PROBLEM?” Scrambling, she threw the sheet over her form, peeking over the edge so only the hat and her eyes could be seen. They narrowed as Joe laughed, taking picture after picture of her.
“Holy shit, there’s a really great one here. I think I managed to capture the exact moment your soul left your body when you realized I was taking pictures...” his voice trailed off as he swiped through the photos he’d taken, smile growing bigger with each one.
“Glad you’re enjoying those horrible pictures. You better burn those Joe, I’m serious.” Pulling the sheet down to her neck, she fixed him with her best glare. It didn’t last long.
How could it when he looked up at her with adoration radiating from his eyes?
“You’re so beautiful.”
Her indignation drained and she sat up, patting the bed, “Come back to me. Please?”
Joe climbed into the bed, kneeling in front of (Y/N) to kiss her softly, “I’ll always come back to you.”
Hiding her head in his shoulder, she pressed a kiss to the soft skin there, fighting back the tears she felt welling up suddenly. Pulling back she heard the click of the camera one more time.
Joe lowered the phone, “So beautiful.”
Taking the phone from him she turned around, her back against his chest as she held it aloft, “C’mon, first picture as a couple.”
Smiling, they took one good one and the rest were a mess. One or both of them pulling ridiculous faces. A series of pictures where Joe was obviously playing with her boobs. Their favorite one was where (Y/N) was mid-laugh and Joe was looking at her, the love between them written so clearly in their eyes that they felt like they were infringing on a private moment.
Looking at it, (Y/N) turned to Joe, “You think we’ll look at each other like that, even when we’re old?”
Chuckling, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head, “Absolutely. You and I are gonna be like that old lady at the baseball game and her husband.”
“Are you calling me a hussy?”
“Again, I’m just calling them like I see them.”
“I feel like you shouldn’t call your own girlfriend a hussy.”
“Oh so you’re my girlfriend now?” Joe rolled on top of her, peppering her face with kisses as she laughed.
“Well I won’t be if you keep calling me a hussy!”
“What if I only called you a hussy when we’re getting sexy?”
Pausing, she reflected on Joe’s proposition, “Hmm, I guess that could be okay. But can you not call it Getting Sexy? That makes it decidedly not sexy.”
“Alright, we’ll come up with something good. Though you should definitely always wear The Sex Hat whenever we fuck.”
Sighing, she flicked the brim of the hat she was still wearing, “I set a dangerous precedent by wearing this, huh?”
“Darling, you have no idea how dangerous you in that hat is.” Joe growled as he nipped her neck.
“Mmm, I think I have a pretty good idea.” She smirked as she tilted her head to the side, “It’s just enough to distract you so I can do this.”
“Wha-” Joe hit the bed with an grunt as she slide out from underneath him and raced out of the room.
“I’M GOING TO EAT THE LAST DUMPLING AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME.”
Pushing himself up, Joe raced after her into the kitchen, knowing he’d be too late to stop her but he wanted to be around to imprint the image of (Y/N) naked in his kitchen into his brain for forever.
#joe mazzello#joe mazzello one shot#joe mazzello smut#baseball!joe#i miss baseball so much gang#might have to watch undrafted just to feel something
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A Night To Remember | A Han Jisung Scenario
Word Count: 2169 (hehe)
Type: Fluffy Smut
Prompts: 55 (It’s just you and me tonight. I was thinking we could have a little fun.) and 58 (I’m just a guy with a wife, two kids, and a Harley.)
Author’s Note:
I’m so sorry this one took so long. I was hoping to have it out like last week, but the storyline was so bland so I had to fix it.
I hope you like it!
I’m not taking requests from this list anymore because I reblogged a different one, but the prompts are from this prompt list.
Marrying your best friend was the best thing you’ve ever done. Having two kids with him? Even better!
Your kids were absolute angels, but they were also 5-years-old. Unfortunately, that meant you had to deal with big messes, arguments, and meltdowns. Tonight was one of those nights where you had to deal with all three.
“MOMMY! Taemin ripped the head off my unicorn!” Your daughter screamed at the top of her lungs, running into the kitchen with the decapitated body of a stuffed unicorn. Geez these children were violent little shits.
“DID NOT! I just wanted to play with him for a bit. SHE was the one who pulled his head off.” Your son ran into the room holding the head of the poor thing. Stuffing poured out of the neck, reminding you of a scene in a horror movie.
This childish argument should be easy to handle. You should have simply told the kids you’d fix the unicorn and turned the scenario into a life lesson. You should have told your kids that if they had shared the unicorn, the unicorn wouldn’t be understuffed with its head popped off. You’d have to buy some stuffing to fix that damn thing.
But no. You had a hectic day at work, and you wanted nothing more than to feed your kids and send them off to the living room to watch their favorite Disney movie on repeat. Thank goodness those kids both loved the same movie, otherwise you would have to deal with another argument.
The perks of having twins.
The timer went off, signaling the pizza was done. You quickly turned the timer off, pulled the pizza out of the oven and threw a couple slices on plates for your kids.
“We’ll deal with this in a bit. Why don’t you two sit down and eat. Dinner is ready.” You put the plates on the dinner table, hoping that having food in their bellies would brighten their mood.
Unfortunately, now you were just dealing with two upset children crying at the table over the unicorn that was thrown on the floor. Yeah, they must love that thing.
You pinched the bridge of your nose, hoping the chaos would disappear.
But it got worse.
“I don’t wanna eat.” Taemin pounded his fists on the table, causing his plate of pizza to tip over, spilling the hot food onto his shirt — which of course, led to another meltdown.
The boy dramatically threw himself to the ground screaming bloody murder as if a bottle of acid was poured onto his chest. If you weren’t dealing with a raging headache from all the screaming, you would have had trouble holding back giggles at the dramatics.
You bent down to his level, pulling his shirt up and checking the area for burns. Thank goodness there were none, but your son was convinced that you were wrong — per usual — so he curled in the fetal position and sobbed.
Nice.
Meanwhile, your daughter had knocked her juice onto the chair, staining the fabric red. She also knocked her pizza to the ground as she ran to her unicorn for comfort, forgetting that the damn thing had no head. She picked up the body and screamed, sobbing once she remembered her unicorn was beheaded.
What the fuck is happening?
Jisung arrived home just as you were starting to lose it. His eyes widened when he witnessed his son scream-crying on the floor holding his belly as if he’d been punched in the gut, and his daughter sobbing on the couch with… what the fuck was that and why did it have no head? He couldn’t help but chuckle as the whole situation was extremely hilarious.
Jisung glanced at his children and said, “Now what did that unicorn ever do to you two?”
“Daddy!” Just like that the two kids dried up their tears and ran to their father, hugging him tight.
Fucking hell. You took this opportunity to head to the kitchen for some much-needed painkillers.
“See? All I have to do is come home and everything’s fine!” Jisung laughed as you rolled your eyes, coming back from the kitchen.
“You’re never allowed to leave again.” You chuckled, walking up to your husband to kiss his cheek.
Jisung released his children to pull you in for a proper kiss. “Are we still on for date night?”
Ah date night. Your favorite day of the week.
A few years ago, you two decided that you needed one day a week to get away from your crazy children and have some adult fun, complete with wine, dinner, and a big ass dessert the two of you would share. You rarely strayed from the usual restaurant, but there were a few spontaneous dates where you two went to arcades and kicked each other’s asses at various games.
“As long as Jen comes over.” You smiled.
As if on queue, you heard a knock at the door before Jen barged in. “Hey guys, are you ready for some fun!”
“Yay!” The kids jumped up and down and ran to Jen, hugging her legs tightly. “We missed you.”
The kids absolutely loved the 16 year old girl. She was beautiful and smart, and she always brought several games and activities for the kids. You adored having her as a babysitter.
You couldn’t help but laugh. When you were 16, you were sneaking off to be with Jisung 24/7. Despite all the trouble the two of you got into, it was clear that you two were made for each other. Your relationship blossomed when you were young, and the two of you had been together ever since.
“You ready?” Jisung held his hand out to you.
You paused, looking at the clothes you were wearing. Ehhhh this’ll be fine. “Yep.” You took his hand and let him lead you out the door to his motorcycle.
Jisung put his helmet on before handing you the white one on the back. “Here. You get to wear the goofy one.” He chuckled.
“What? Why can’t I swear the cool one?” You giggled and put the white helmet over your head.
“Because I’m the driver. I get first pick.” Jisung laughed when you smacked his shoulder.
You rested your hands on your hips and struck a goofy pose. “What do you think? I think I look good in it.”
“You look like an egghead.” He dodged your hand, laughing as you chased him around the motorcycle. When you caught him you tickled his sides, sending the boy into a fit of giggles.
“Okay okay mercy!” He held his hands up. “You look like a gorgeous model. Now let’s go on our date before we’re late.”
You laughed and climbed on the back of his motorcycle, wrapping your arms around his torso so you wouldn’t fall off. Jisung turned the key, making the engine roar to life. “You ready?” He asked.
You leaned your head onto his back, before answering him. “Yep. Let’s go!”
Jisung twisted his wrist, making the bike lurch forward. You loved riding on the back of his motorcycle. You could remember the day he first got it. He saved all the money he made from work as a teenager and bought the thing in cash when he was nineteen years old.
Jisung parked the bike in front of a fancy looking hotel in the city. You couldn’t help but wonder what Jisung had planned for the night. Of course if you were getting a room at the beautiful hotel, you figured you’d be getting intimate tonight. The anticipation sent shivers up your spine.
“Why are we at a super nice hotel?” You couldn’t help but gawk at the amazing architecture and wonder what it looked like inside.
Jisung merely laughed. “It’s just you and me tonight. I was thinking we could have a little fun.”
Yep, that was exactly what you were hoping he’d say. Every single time you and Jisung went past making out, one of your kids would barge into the room screaming about how the other ruined their life. You had many close calls — nearly having to have the talk with a pair of nosy 5-year-olds. So intimate moments were few and far between.
You held your hand out to his. “Then let’s get going.”
Jisung smiled and practically pulled you into the hotel. The two of you booked a nice room and quickly headed to the elevator. As soon as the doors closed, your lips interlocked. Jisung’s tongue slipped into your mouth with ease, hands pulling you closer as his tongue slid against yours.
A ding startled the two of you as you pulled apart. You giggled as the doors opened to show another man standing in front of the elevator.
“This is our floor babe.” Jisung pulled you out of the elevator, laughing with you as you headed straight to your room. As soon as the door closed behind you, Jisung dimmed the lights and took off his shirt.
The makeout session was messy, uncoordinated tongues sliding together, hands frantically removing clothes as the two of you bumped against the walls. Jisung pulled your right knee over his hip, tapping your thigh to signal for you to jump. You hopped up, wrapping your legs around his waist, moaning into the kiss as he pulled your panties to the side and thrusted into you.
Oh god that was sexy.
When did he get his pants off? A deep thrust into your core had you forgetting all about it as your hands shifted down to hold onto his shoulders. Jisung moved, pressing you against the wall as he set a quick pace, snapping his hips into yours.
God you felt so good around him. Jisung lifted you off the wall making you giggle nervously. Your arms tightened around him, hanging on like your life depended on it. “You good?” Jisung chuckled as he walked over to the bed.
“Mhmm.” You smiled when he kissed your lips.
“Good.” Jisung smiled deviously.
What was he planning?
You shrieked when he tossed you on the bed, giggling when he crawled up your body to rip your bralette over your head. He quickly pulled your underwear off your hips and slid back inside you, hiking your legs over his shoulders.
The new position had him hitting your g-spot dead on, making you cry out in pleasure. Your back arched off the bed as you rubbed your clit. Jisung kept with the harsh pace, savoring the sounds of your sweet moans.
“Fuck Ji.” You gasped when his tip rammed into your g spot once again. “It feels so good.” Your fingers rubbed your clit faster, toes curling as you hit your high.
Jisung moaned as your walls clenched around him, milking him into his orgasm. He thrusted a few more times, helping you ride out your orgasm before collapsing on top of you.
“It’s been a while hasn’t it?” You giggled.
“Hey!” Jisung pushed your shoulder making you laugh even harder. “It’s not my fault…” He paused. Yeah… Yeah it was his fault. It was his fault the two of you didn’t spend more time together.
He sighed and rolled over, pulling you onto his chest. “I’m sorry.”
“Wait, Jisung that’s not what I meant.” You sat up, pressing a gentle kiss on his lips. “I was just teasing you. You seem exhausted.”
“Yeah because I haven’t fucked you in ages.” He chuckled. “We need to do this more often.” Jisung pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Because that was great.”
You giggled and tightened your arms around his frame. “You need to pull out or we’re going to have another round.”
Jisung chuckled and pulled out of you. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
“Well we do have to get home to the kids.” You sat up, frowning when Jisung pulled you back down onto his chest. His arm wrapped around your shoulder, pressing your body closer to him.
“Nope. I paid Jen to stay there all night. We have until noon tomorrow.” He smiled, running one of his hands through your hair.
You leaned into Jisung’s touch, eyes closing as you enjoyed the sweet attention. “You’re the best.”
“Me?” Jisung chuckled. “Nah, I’m just a guy with a wife, two kids, and a Harley.”
You couldn’t help but laugh at his nonchalance. “You’re so much more than that though.”
Jisung kissed you softly before leaning his head against yours. The two of you sat in silence, simply enjoying each other’s presence. It was nice to lay with your husband without hearing your kids scream for you at the top of their lungs.
“Hey.” Jisung poked your side, making your body jump.
You lightly poked his stomach in return. “Hmm?”
“I brought the Switch. Let’s hook it up to the TV and play Mario Kart.” Jisung had a cute grin on his face.
You shot up off the bed and threw on Jisung’s T-shirt. “THIS is exactly why I married you.”
This was definitely a night to remember.
#han jisung#stray kids han jisung#stray kids jisung#stray kids han#han#jisung#skz han#skz jisung#skz han jisung#han jisung scenario#han jisung scenarios#han jisung imagine#han jisung blurb#han jisung imagines#han jisung blurbs#han jisung drabble#han jisung drabbles#jisung scenario#jisung scenarios#jisung imagine#jisung imagines#jisung blurb#jisung blurbs#jisung drabble#jisung drabbles#han jisung x reader#reader x han jisung#jisung x reader#reader x jisung#han jisung x you
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Ask game for fanfic writers! ⌨️🖊📓📝
1. What fandoms do you write for?
2. What pairings do you write for?
3. What is your most popular fanfic?
4. Do you write original stories as well?
5. What fanfic of yours should everyone have read?
6. What is a fandom you will never write for?
7. What is a ship you will never write for?
8. Archive of Our Own, FanFiction.net, Wattpad, Tumblr, etc. which platform do you prefer?
9. What are your favorite fanfics?
10. How do you stay motivated to finish what you’ve started?
11. What’s your longest fanfic?
12. Do you want to break your readers‘ heart or make them laugh?
13. What is your planning process?
14. What have others criticized about your fanfic?
15. OCs or no OCs?
16. Do you use sentence starters, writing prompts and/or fandom headcanons for your fanfics?
17. Do you use/follow advice from writing blogs/posts?
18. What is your favorite writing prompt?
19. Dead or overused tropes?
20. Can we get a list of all of your current available fanfics?
21. What’s your shortest fanfic?
22. Do you listen to music during your writing process? What music do you listen to while you’re writing?
23. Long chapters or short chapters?
24. How many WIPs (work-in-progress) do you’ve got?
25. How many WIPs will you finish?
26. First-person-narrative or third-person-narrative?
27. Do you take requests?
28. I will name you three things (drunk Ian — shared bachelor party — Gallavich): write a paragraph or two!
29. What’s more difficult? Fanfics or original work?
30. What writing software do you use?
31. Do you use beta/sensitivity readers?
32. Past or present tense?
33. Do friends and family know that you write fanfics?
34. How did you find the magical world of fanfics?
35. What is your favorite review?
36. Did you ever delete a work of yours?
37. Did your work ever get plagiarized?
38. Do you partake in any fanfic/writing events? (Big bangs, zines, NaNoWriMo, etc?)
39. Collaborations or working solo?
40. Do you have any rituals before uploading a fic?
41. What is something you don’t like about your writing?
42. Rudest review?
43. Guilty pleasure tropes and scenarios?
44. Does fanart of your fanfic exist?
45. Do fanfics of your fanfic exist?
46. Few long essay reviews or many short reviews?
47. What fanfic of yours is truly underrated?
48. What is your favorite sentence that you’ve used in a fanfic?
49. Where do you draw inspiration from?
50. Can we get a teaser for an upcoming chapter?
(Don't feel obligated to answer. Thought if you're into these kinda things, that'd be a nice ask. ;))
Oh this is so nice!! Thanks for sending this @annansmith
I chose a few of them to do.
1. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently, I’m writing for Shameless (Gallavich) but I’ve written for:
Veronica Mars (LoVe), Veep (Amy/Dan), Arrow (Oliver/Felicity), Once Upon A Time (Hook/Emma), The Old Guard (Joe/Nicky), That 70′s show (Hyde/Jackie), Sons of Anarchy (Tara/Jax), Vampire Diaries (Klaroline), Hart of Dixie (Zoe/Wade), Gilmore Girls (Rory/Jess), X-men (Rogue/Pyro), One Tree Hill (Haley/Nathan), and a few others.
2. What pairings do you write for?
Now I write Gallavich.
But I’d say my top ones I love writing for now (my fanfiction writing has spanned about 14 years) are Dan/Amy, Veronica/Logan, Klaus/Caroline, Mickey/Ian.
3. What is your most popular fanfic?
My most popular fic on Ao3 is The Course of True Love (Arrow) and on FF Of Bloodshed, Babies, and Epic LoVe (Veronica Mars)
4. Do you write original stories as well?
Yes, I do. I’m working on a book, well, two books. But it’s going very slowly. The first is a memoir of my travels from around the world and the second is a vampire urban fantasy one. We’ll see how it goes, but I’d like to finish them by next year and see if I can get them published, but it’s hard so who knows.
10. How do you stay motivated to finish what you’ve started?
Well, recently I’ve really been trying to finish everything I write. I have a lot of WIPs from years and years ago and even within the the last year, so this answer is pretty new. Basically, I focus on one fic at a time and write a little every day to stay motivated. Now, I try to update once a week on a certain day. I think comments/reviews and kudos and people being genuinely encouraging helps though. It’s also what’s gotten me considering finishing my older fics.
11. What’s your longest fanfic?
Of Bloodshed, Babies, and Epic Love (over 165k)
13. What is your planning process?
Now, it’s different. I have a doc of ideas and I wait to see which one I can’t seem to shake. Then I plan out each chapter with a few sentences and I have a list of things I want to focus on in the story. Usually, each story now has a kind of theme to it and a main focus. I sometimes will just want to write a certain situation/scene/focus and the story is born from there. But what really helps is writing down chapter 1, 2, etc. and having a sentence or two for what I want to happen. It doesn’t always go according to plan, but I never get writers block or forget what happened in previous chapters now.
16. Do you use sentence starters, writing prompts and/or fandom headcanons for your fanfics?
Probably a mixture of fandom (or my personal) headcanons. I don’t start with prompts unless it’s a challenge or sentence starters. Usually, I have a scene I already want to write in my head and then I sit down and write it.
17. Do you use/follow advice from writing blogs/posts?
Yes, I’ve read several books on writing. My undergrad was creative writing too, so I learned a lot there. I also follow writing instagram accounts which are helpful. I take everything I learn with a grain of salt and I see what is best for me. The best advice I heard recently was short sentences and so now I’m experimenting with that.
20. Can we get a list of all of your current available fanfics?
There’s a lot from many different fandoms. I used to be on FF.net as Psyc0gurl0 and now I’m ProstheticLoVe on a03. I like writing on ao3 better cause it’s easier and I love the tagging process. Plus the gallavich fandom on there is unreal. So to think about going back to ff.net to finish my WIPs seems like such a process now.
Currently though, I’m writing an Ian’s POV 5 chapter fic called Chocolate. It’s not out yet, but it’ll focus on Ian from 1x06 to 1x09 or so and how his feelings for Mickey change and evolve. It’s the second part to a series called Chocolate and Cigarettes. Mickey’s POV was Cigarettes.
22. Do you listen to music during your writing process? What music do you listen to while you’re writing?
Yes, I listen while writing but I need silence while editing. I have a Love (lol) playlist. It’s basically all the love songs that remind me of couples I ship. So for example, The Acid is in there a lot because their music is great, but also Basic Instinct is so haunting. Overall, I like all music except country, so sometimes I’ll listen to my larger playlists while writing.
23. Long chapters or short chapters?
So this has changed over the years. Initially, I wrote short chapters, then when I got back into fanfiction while writing klaroline they got a lot longer and now it’s just basically where the chapter has a natural ending. So the chapters are between 4 - 10k words depending. I try to get over 4k though. Right now, once I’m done with my current fic, I really want to write something over 100k.
24. How many WIPs (work-in-progress) do you’ve got?
A lot...none in Shameless though. Well, I guess my current one, but I haven’t posted that yet. I’d say I probs have about 10 WIPs spanning different fandoms. I know. But my goal for 2021 is to pick two and finish them.
25. How many WIPs will you finish?
Not all of them. Some of them are from years and years ago. But I’d like to finish the ones that I still get reviews on. So there’s a SOAs fic I want to finish cause that fandom is so lovely. I also want to finish a klaroline one cause that was fun to write. And my Amy/Dan ones I’d like to finish. I would like to finish my Veronica Mars ones (I have two) but they need a lot more attention, so when people message me about them I tell them the planned ending.
28. I will name you three things (drunk Ian — shared bachelor party — Gallavich): write a paragraph or two!
“Fuck, Mickey, I probably shouldn’t have had the third Hot Toddy,” Ian grimaced as the world around him spun.
Mickey laughed at him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Ian wanted to think his future husband just wanted to pull him closer, but he had a feeling it was to steady him.
“Probably should’ve cut you off earlier,” Mickey said tugging Ian closer.
Ian wobbled and plopped down on the back steps of the porch. Mickey followed suit a moment letter and they both looked out toward the backyard where the Gallaghers, Balls, and a few of the Milkovich cousins were alternatively huddling around a fire, drinking, and dancing.
“I blame Lip for making us have this stupid shared bachelor party in the first place,” Ian grumbled.
Mickey kissed him on the forehead as Ian lay his head on his shoulder. “It’s Sandy’s fault too.”
Ian hmmed in response and Mickey knew he was going to fall asleep any moment. He ran his hand up and down Ian’s arm and watched as Debbie bounced over to them.
“Jesus, you aren’t even married yet and you two are like an old married couple. Are you going to come dance or what?” she whined.
Mickey looked down at Ian, whose eyes were already closed, and then back up to Debbie. She was watching them with knowing eyes.
“We’ll dance at the wedding. Go grab Lip, I need his help to get Sleeping Beauty upstairs.”
Debbie turned to go get her eldest brother and Mickey looked back down at Ian. In his sleep, he nuzzled Mickey’s shoulder, breathed deeply, and a gentle smile appeared there.
3 more days and they’d officially be husbands.
34. How did you find the magical world of fanfics?
I was about 10 and my cousin used to write a buffy the vampire slayer zine. There was a link to a site called buffyworld.com or something like that. And I found fanfic that way. There was a link on the site to ff.net and that’s how I stumbled across that. I stayed there for many many years until my second time in the veronica mars fandom around 2014 when I was lead to a03 and then I’ve been there ever since. On and off, my writing has fluctuated through the years based on my personal life.
49. Where do you draw inspiration from?
Everywhere! omg. It’s insane. Gallavich I love writing for. There’s so many different facets to them, but truly everywhere I find inspiration. I have a whole doc of gallavich ideas that have stemmed from other fanfics, headcanons from me and other people, rewatching episodes, what’s going to happen in s11, cute moments i’d like to see happen, holidays, and just general life. I saw a pic of WW2 vets who were in a long term relationship and i was like mickey and ian! another idea is born.
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Pride Month may be over but Dead Boy Detectives lives on forever 🙏🙏 (that pun was not intentional, but I’m keeping it like that because it’s funny)
Happy Not-Pride-Month to my favorite dead married couple on acid
#dead boy detectives#dbda#edwin payne#charles rowland#payneland#dead boy detective agency#dead boy detective netflix#not-the-living-ghost
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Wicked (1/10) - No One Mourns the Wicked
A/N: I been working on a Bucky series for a little while, but I didn’t have any inspiration for it. I’ve recently went and saw the musical Wicked which is one of my favorite musicals. I knew I wanted to do a fusion of two of my favorite things, Wicked and Bucky Barnes. This is the first chapter in the series.
Summary: Bucky Barnes did many horrendous and evil things. He didn’t felt worthy of love and affection because after all, who could learn to love a monster.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Masterlist
"No one mourns the wicked, no one cries they won't return, no one lays a lily on their grave"
When the Black Widow released all of Hydra's files, all of their dirty and horrendous secrets came out. This included the files of the mysterious Winter Soldier. The world learned that Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, Captain America's best friend, didn't die when he fell from the train on that fateful day in Austria. Instead, he was captured by Hydra and was tortured and brainwashed into becoming a deadly assassin. Some of the information included in these leaked files were the Winter Soldier's long list of victims, which included Howard and Maria Stark: Tony Stark's parents. Pair this new information with the events that happened in D.C., the court of public opinion was split. Some saw Sergeant Barnes as a victim of war. He never had any say in the matter. He was kidnapped, tortured, and experimented on. He was then forced to kill innocent people to advance an organization he was forced to be apart of. Others, while recognizing these points, thought he was a murderous assassin. They thought, that in the end, Barnes was responsible for all of these murders and that he should be held responsible in front of the law. They felt that he was a monster, who deserved no sympathy or empathy, and if you were to ask Sergeant Barnes, he would agree with them.
After Princess Shuri was able to remove the trigger words from Bucky's head, and finally take him off the cryofreeze, those close to Bucky hoped that he could finally put his terrible past behind him. But, things aren't as easy as we think they will be. While the trigger words have been removed from his mind, Bucky still suffered from PTSD, anxiety, and petrifying nightmares. In Bucky's mind, he thought that the nightmares were the worst. They were the worst because it was always the same dream and it wasn't a replay of the countless murders he executed, or even about his torture. It was about his mother, Winnifred Barnes.
Tonight's dream is just like every other dream. He survives the war uninjured. He and Steve make their way back to Brooklyn. Steve goes on his own back to the tiny apartment he had when he left for the war, leaving Bucky to walk back home by himself. Walking home with a stupid grin that's plastered on his face, he can't wait to see his ma. Despite the player and lady's man persona he has created, deep down Bucky Barnes is a mama's boy. During the war, he would write back to his ma every week. That's why when he reaches his home, his heart can barely contain its joy. He opens the door to see his ma sitting at the table, arms folded across her chest. Bucky is taken aback by her attitude. "Aren't you going to come give your boy a hug?" Bucky asks, wondering why she is acting in such a peculiar way. "Why would I want to touch a monster like you?" Winnifred Barnes responds, her words laced with acid. "I don't understand what you're talking about Ma. What's going on with ya?" Bucky, now completely and utterly confused, asks. "You know perfectly well what I mean. I've seen what you have become. Tell me, how does it feel to know you are nothing but a murderer? Did it feel good?" She says while standing up. Her face is covered with pure hatred. "It would have been better if you were dead. Then I could have forgotten you completely because who would want to be the mother of a murderer. And it would be better for you. Cause who would want to marry a murderer? Who could ever learn to love a monster like you?" She harshly asks as she gets closer to Bucky. She grabs Bucky's shirt, pulling him closer and saying "Because I know I could never learn to love you again!" She yells as she lets go of Bucky's shirt, causing him to fall. He falls into a casket. Looking up, he sees his mother for one last time, as she starts to pour dirt into the casket sized hole.
Bucky wakes up sweating, his breathing irregular and extremely fast, and crying. He always cries after this dream. It breaks his heart to hear such harsh words come out of his mother's mouth. It breaks his heart even more because he knows that his mother is right. All Bucky wanted during the war, and now, after all, he has been through, was to start a family. Find a loving wife, have a couple of kids and just settle down. But he knew that his mother was right. How could anyone ever learn to love a monster like himself?
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes#marvel#wicked#series#angst#bucky fic#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes fanfiction
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[untitled Ironstrange excerpt]
Note: May be largely offline for the next 36 hours, so I don’t think I’ll be able to finish this over the weekend, but I wanted to put something up anyway. For the bingo square “Water,” but I’m not going to tag the bingo folk for this until the whole thing is done.
I am running very late for my out-of-town bus so...posting this now and apologizing in advance for any typos or continuity/grammatical errors. This will highly likely be edited before it gets finished and goes into AO3.
***
Tony wasn't warned that when the sorcerer "died," he was going to haunt Tony's dreams.
"...Well, that's creepy," were Tony's first words upon finding out. “Could’ve told me earlier you can do that.”
“It was a last-minute sort of thing,” was the vague, quiet explanation.
"Does that mean you're not really dead?"
"It means I've found a way to escape being completely banished from this reality,” Stephen calmly explained. “I wouldn't call it 'not dead,' as I don't have a body anymore. I’m still technically around, I’m just not able to interact with anything outside of the dream dimension.”
Tony blinked. “The what now?”
“The dream - “ Wrong approach. He had to make it simpler. “- okay, your dream, specifically. A couple of people’s dreams.”
"You mean I’m not the only one who enjoys this special privilege?” Tony asked with a hefty dose of sarcasm, folding his arms across his chest.
“No,” Stephen answered, deadpan. “I can visit a few other humans. Other sorcerers. There’s Wong, for example - you remember him?”
“Course I remember,” Tony snapped. “He was the one of the only two wizards I know who didn’t let Thanos waste half the universe.”
Stephen paused. A small, frustrated sigh escaped him.
“You’re still sore about that...”
“Yeah, no shit,” Tony replied. “Since you can go bother other people, why don’t you go ahead and do that?”
“I need to talk to you, Tony.”
“Yeah, well, tough.” Tony scowled. “I’m in a life-or-death situation outside of this dream, and I doubt anything you tell me can make a difference.”
Tony’s spite burned, but was far from unforgiving.
There was still a flicker in his eyes, which asked Why? Why did you do it? Why me?
It told Stephen that Tony needed time.
"Don't worry," Stephen assured him. "you'll forget we ever talked when you wake up."
Before Tony could ask what he meant, he vanished, leaving Tony to see the rest of his dream through.
***
But time was something Stephen didn’t have in abundance. He had to hurry it along somehow.
He had to set the scene.
The last time they spoke, in the real world, Tony was in a broken ship, with a daughter of Thanos, millions of light years away from Earth.
The barely-moving derelict’s supplies were running out. The daughter of Thanos, not human, could barely understand Tony’s need for human contact at that bleak, desperate moment.
All this, Stephen learned by observing Tony as he dreamed of soft beds, cheeseburgers, coffee, friends’ laughter, and the warm embrace of the woman he wanted to marry.
In the dream dimension, Stephen couldn’t see into Tony’s thoughts, but he could see Tony’s desires and fears.
Tony was afraid he wouldn’t see Earth again.
Deathly afraid.
Knowing that helped Stephen figure out what to do.
So the next time he and Tony spoke, it was in the premises of a cozy lakeside cabin, facing out into the water.
The house wasn’t familiar to Tony. Not yet. But when he materialized on the porch in his dream, he took to the place instantly.
“I see you’ve redecorated,” he remarked, clearly impressed. “This place isn’t bad.”
“You should know, you chose it.” Stephen caught himself and added, “Well...will choose it. And it isn’t actually you, but Ms. Potts who’ll be doing the choosing. It’ll take you the better part of a year to warm up to it, but you’ll get there.”
Tony said nothing. He was looking out into the placid water. Stephen looked out of it, as well.
“This was - is - will be - your favorite spot.”
“Has anyone ever told you how weird you are?”
Stephen didn’t miss the acid in Tony’s voice. But he chose to ignore it.
“Think of this as a vacation house. A place where you can recover.” He continued slowly, “I know that I left you in a...difficult place.”
Tony snorted. “A difficult place” was a hell of a euphemism for “floating in space with fast-depleting resources and no hope of rescue.”
“You need your strength, so it’s important that you rest,” Stephen said, with undisguised warmth. “We’ll have time to talk later.”
Tony could have had a comeback to that, but he was tired...so tired. He was often tired in real life, but he couldn’t disguise it in his dreams.
And the man who walked his dreams, who could see what he hid inside of them, left him quietly to recuperate.
[tbc]
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Listed: Prana Crafter
Portland’s Prana Crafter, aka William Sol, works with guitars, synthesizers and singing bowls to create free flowing improvisations rooted in organic sounds. He’s recorded his kosmische flavored psych rock and acid folk on labels including Beyond Beyond is Beyond, Eiderdown, Deep Water Acres, Reverb Worship, Sunrise Ocean Bender and Cardinal Fuzz Records. Jennifer Kelly reviewed his latest, a split with Tarotplane, approving, “a feedback blistered, electric attack that is nonetheless somewhat pastoral, like Neil Young through a thick filter of codeine.” Check out a Listed from Prana Crafter’s partner-in-psych, Tarotplane, here.
Ash Ra Tempel—Live at Cologne/Köln (1973)
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When I first heard Göttsching I felt like I had finally heard someone as engaging and creative as Garcia and Hendrix, and I still feel that way about him and he’s a continual source of inspiration for me. Ash Ra Tempel is something that I listen to consistently and part of what brought Tarotplane (PJ) and I together. PJ is a true encyclopedia of knowledge about European psychedelic music, and when he read that there was some guy out in the PNW being written about with descriptions including references to bands like Ash Ra Tempel and Popol Vuh, so he had no choice but to check out some music and see how far off the mark these writers were, but luckily he liked what he heard and reached out to talk to me about AR & Machines! A bit later he turned me onto this live Ash Ra Tempel set from ’73 which I hadn’t heard and it blew me away. What I attempted to do with my side of Symbiose was to follow the path that Manuel laid out all those decades ago and do some really exploratory guitar work in an improvised fashion, across a broad canvas in terms of time-scale. A nice bit of trivia is that my side of Symbiose features a killer delay pedal that PJ sent me from to help me in my explorations of what I could do within the medium of solo guitar based music.
Terry Riley—Shri Camel (1977), Holland Festival
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Terry Riley is up near the top of my list of artists I listen to on a regular basis, the flow of his creative stream resonates really deeply with me when I am in a contemplative or creative mind-set. I do a lot of writing and reading and his music I find to be like cognitive-creative nectar. This particular clip is really a classic and something that I come back to often to watch and be absorbed within, it’s a blessing this was recorded and that all these years later we can enjoy watching the birth of something so beautiful and truly innovative.
Don Cherry—“Chenrezig”
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I didn’t learn about Don Cherry until a few years ago when I heard his duo work with Terry Riley. I knew right away I had been missing out and quickly rectified the situation by delving into as much as I could find, and I’m so glad I did. There is something so special about his phrasing, so alive and brimming with mojo, I’m pretty sure I could pick a Cherry riff out of a line-up with cotton balls in both ears.
The Grateful Dead—Jam 5/19/74, Portland Memorial Coliseum
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I make no qualms about my love for Jerry Garcia and obsession with the Dead sound and energy between the late 60s and early 70s. This jam, released as part of the PNW box-set last year is fantastic in that it comes at the end of my favorite era, so it has shades of early-Dead, and foreshadows future trajectories, it’s funky and smooth, but still sharp and glistening with that psychedelic afterglow of the early 60s.
Garcia & Wales—“Space Funk”
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Although it seems very odd due to his godlike status among many, I actually think Jerry Garcia is underrated in the sense that many people just see him as either a ‘rock’ guitarist, or a psychedelic icon, but if you dig into his acoustic and jazz work, you really hear what a humble master he was. Probably nothing in my collection gets more play than Garcia & Wales Side Trips Vol. I and Hooteroll!, what can I say, it’s just absolutely phenomenal stuff. There is a live recording floating out there which is really great, but besides that it’s hard to find anything else featuring these two masters together. From what I understand, Wales still lives and performs occasionally around Marin County.
Bill Frisell & James McNew—“Dark star -> comes a time 10/05/2014,” Seattle, WA
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Of all modern jazz guitar players, I’m really drawn to Frisell, Ribot, Conners, and Scofield, and have been listening to Frisell for a long time. So when a friend named Joel Berk (Joel released a great track on Hypnic Jerk tapes under the moniker Ragenap) turned me onto this live recording of Frisell and James McNew doing a very loose but dynamic dark star -> comes a time in my neck of the woods, my ears were drooling. I love having friends with impeccable musical taste because they facilitate this constant process of being surprised and delighted by sonic treasures.
Medeski, Martin, & Wood—“Shack Man”
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I first heard MM&W when I was going to the Evergreen State College here in Washington, this was almost 20 years ago now and some of the jam-band type things that are still around now were really in their prime and a lot of people at the school were from that scene, but also loved things like Zappa, and MM&W, and that’s where I first heard this type of modern improvisational jazz. It was cool for me because for part of my childhood my mom was married to a guy who played in a jazz quintet and they practiced at our house, so seeing and hearing MM&W was like going back in time and feeling that group improv vibe again, but this time oozing out of psychedelic beatnik seeming guys instead of the more uptight orchestra crowd.
Donovan—“Jersey Thursday”
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I listen to a lot of acoustic based folk music from the 60s and 70s and Donovan has been a favorite since I was a kid and my dad would play ‘Hurdy Gurdy Man’ on his old 1950s Martin guitar. He told me that when he was younger and a friend would be having a bad trip, they would put Donovan on, medicinally, to mellow the person out, I’m guessing it wasn’t ‘Season of the Witch’, I imagine it to be something more like this absolute gem ‘Jersey Thursdays’ or maybe ‘Wear your love like heaven’, and definitely ‘first there is a mountain…’
Friends of Dean Martinez—“All in the Golden Afternoon”
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Of modern psychedelic bands, Friends of Dean Martinez are one of my favorites, I really enjoy the spaced out pedal steel and really ominous tone of the whole band as they meld together and create a truly cinematic sound that I’m surprised hasn’t inspired more copy-cat acts across the country over the past couple decades. This particular track is my favorite of their material and I think it probably always will be.
Sandy Bull—“Electric Blend (E Pluribus Unum)”
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Sandy Bull is someone I really admire in terms of his approach to improvisation and the really primitive vibe he conjures, even when playing an electric guitar. Terrence McKenna used to talk about a ‘primitive revival’ in which people would be drawn back to a stronger connection with the natural world and a primitive way of relating to life, and when I hear Sandy Bull I feel like I’m listening to something timeless, as if I could be hearing the same thing 1,000 years ago on a remote mountainside, a mustached Sandy Bull sitting in the doorway of his hut, snaking his way around the strings of a homemade Oud, grinning that cosmic smile. This was the B-side of his classic album E Pluribus Unum from Vanguard and I’d be remiss here not to mention my love for John Fahey as well, and although I’ve never had the honor of releasing on Vanguard myself, one of the nicest things a writer has written about my music was Dave Thompson from Goldmine Magazine who wrote this about my first CD release on Deep Water Acres: “if you want to play a really good trick on your snobbiest friends, slap an old Elektra or Vanguard label on the CD and make them guess who it is.”
#dusted magazine#listed#prana crafter#ash ra tempel#terry riley#don cherry#the grateful dead#jerry garcia#howard wales#bill frisell#james mcnew#medeski martin & wood#donovan#friends of dean martinez#sandy bull
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Michael After Midnight: Seed of Chucky
So after Child’s Play 3 fucking failed, where could the series possibly go? Well, by the time a sequel came out, it was the late 90s, so obviously it had to be a tongue-in-cheek black comedy! Bride of Chucky was a lot more comical than the previous films in the franchise while still keeping a somewhat dark edge to it; the kills are still brutal, and a lot more sensible than the ones in the last film. Brad Dourif is back to the top of his game here too, with Chucky being a bit less bullshit stupid and more enjoyably psychotic and demented.
But of course, the absolute best thing this movie brought was Tiffany, Chucky’s equally crazy killer girlfriend, played by Jennifer Tilly. Tilly does an excellent job, and her voice is seriously perfect for a crazy, sultry, sexy serial killer. She’s easily the best part of the movie, and the best addition to the franchise since Kyle in the second film. This film has a lot of weird shit, like doll sex, but it’s all part of the charm here; this movie isn’t as good as the first two, but as a film on its own it ain’t too bad, I gotta say. It’s enjoyable at the least. The film ends with Tiffany, seemingly dead, giving birth to a new doll due to the unprotected doll sex she had earlier… and, well, that leads us into tonight’s film, Seed of Chucky.
The story is of a doll, a pasty little ginger doll who wants to know where he came from. His “Made In Japan” birthmark leads him to go to Hollywood, because he saw Chucky had the same tattoo and they’re now filming a movie based on Chucky… a movie starring Jennifer Tilly as Tiffany. So The kid goes there, wakes up his parents, and then what ensues is basically a family comedy with murderous dolls who are trying to impregnate and possess Jennifer Tilly. Oh and the kid is not anatomically correct so Chucky calls him Glen and Tiffany calls him Glenda. Hijinks ensue.
So this film actually reminded me a lot of the fifth Friday the 13th film… and that’s not a good thing, since that movie fucking sucks. This movie is definitely better than that one, but they both have a similar problem, in that one character brings the entire film down. In that film, it’s the character awkwardly revealed to be Jason at the last second, while here… it’s Glen. This ugly, creepy, pasty freakish doll child is an awful character, and I don’t mean personality wise or even voice-wise, though both of those things are really grating. No, he’s just so goddamn uncomfortable to look at and just plain ugly. His parents aren’t exactly lookers themselves, but Tiffany and Chucky at least have somewhat appealingly creepy designs; Glen, on the other hand, is straight up uncanny valley material. He’s just unpleasant to look at, and since he’s our lead, dealing with his parents and their insanity, he’s onscreen for a vast majority of the film. It gets even worse near the end where Glen gets a split personality called Glenda, who is equally unpleasant to look at and is absolutely demented.
It’s a shame too, because there’s a lot to like in this film. Of note is Jennifer Tilly, who is playing a hilariously overexaggerated version of herself. Much like in the last film, she’s the best part, but here’s she’s doubly good since she’s playing both Tiffany and this caricature of herself. Chucky and Tiffany are pretty on top of their comedic game here, and while it is a bit offputting there is something dementedly hilarious about these two psychopaths chatting and bickering about normal married couple things. One of my favorite moments comes when Chucky axes through a door and sticks his head in; you expect, at this point in a movie overly saturated in references, for him to make an obligatory reference to The Shining. Instead, he says something to the effect of, “You know, I can’t really think of anything to say.” It’s dumb, but I laughed. It was certainly a lot funnier than when Chucky and Glen drove Britney Spears off the road and made her explode. No idea why THAT was in the movie.
Back to my problems with the film… there are a lot of moments in the final third where I felt the movie could have ended and kept a little dignity, but… it just kept going on and on and on. Like, Chucky, Glen(da), and Tiffany have Tilly, her newborn twins, and her chauffeur all tied up and they’re ready to do the voodoo soul switch ritual… but then Chucky interrupts with a pretty epic speech before Tiffany gets sick of his shit and decides to leave him and take the kid. Then after Tilly is in the hospital, you think it might be over, but then Glen and Tiffany show up to possess her and the kids, BUT THEN Chucky shows up, BUT THEN he kills Tiffany, BUT THEN Glen does a fucking kung fu leap and kills Chucky and chops him up…
BUT FUCKING THEN IT CUTS TO YEARS LATER… WITH THE TILLY FAMILY… AND THE TWO KIDS WERE POSSESSED BY GLEN AND GLENDA AND JENNIFER HAS BEEN TAKEN OVER BY TIFFANY. BUT FUCKING THEN, AT THE LAST FUCKING MINUTE, THEY GOTTA THROW IN SOME MORE BULLSHIT AND HAVE CHUCKY MAIL HIS ARM TO GLEN AND oh my god who fucking cares. At this point the movie has lost every shred of decency and dignity it ever had; no amount of John Waters having his face melted off by acid can make up for this bullshit… ok, it helps a little, but god, this still fucking sucks.
This is just an unpleasant movie to watch. It’s like the entire film is in the uncanny valley thanks to Glen and his utterly creepy design. It’s just not fun no matter how many good jokes and good performances are here, all because they had to make Chucky’s kid into a hideous, disturbing, whiny little British twat. This is the fucking bottom of the barrel as far as slasher sequels go, and it’s easily the worst film in the Child’s Play series.
The series remained dormant for a long while after, eventually coming back for the straight-to-video Curse of Chucky, which ended up being awesome and suspenseful much like the first film. That was followed up with the also awesome Cult of Chucky. Interestingly, while it is absolutely evident Bride is still canon – Tiffany being there is proof enough of that – it’s a bit ambiguous as to whether or not this film is, because aside from some vague allusions there’s nothing that directly confirms it. Glen(da) sure hasn’t shown up, which I sure am glad for… let’s hope it stays that way. These films are back on a good track, so let’s not fuck it up by bringing back the most unpleasant character in the series.
#Michael After Midnight#Review#Movie review#Child's Play#Chucky#Seed of Chucky#black comedy#horror#slasher
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