#my fanart: pile of contradictions

[ivorywreathablaze]

Sometimes, she thinks she feels him there.

Happy (belated) Halloween!

[galacticnova3]

i don't know what's going on but i really hope things start getting better because its disheartening to see people stressing you out needlessly. i wish those anons a very "hey. cut it out"

Tbh at this point it’s less stress and more “man what did I do to get this crap”. I’m not even one of the Big Tunglers™️ so it’s not just bigger audience meaning higher chance of weirdos. I am just some guy(gener neutral) who made an intentionally easy-to-hate-but-not-just-annoyingly-unlikable character and suddenly someone decided “yea I’d bang” and never made it clear if it was ironic or not. Also the tortilla shooter thing was brought up and quickly devolved.

While that initially got old I personally think the new idea of collaborative shitpost “oc” developed by random people in my inbox has good meme/inside joke potential. Also just the social experiment of seeing where different folks take it and what becomes accepted tortilla canon or not. I want to let the chaos unfold. I want to witness some shit like an indirect argument over whether or not misogynistic tortilla oc should be officially named Brad or Iru 2 and instead of mediating it I would simply provide an objectively worse name suggestion. I want to watch someone try to write a tragic backstory for a fucking tortilla and have it immediately contradict another potential backstory. Imagine fanart of what is essentially just a sentient tortilla that disrespects women. I think this has too much funny potential for me to ignore.

Ok that was a long tangent, uh… To express something I said elsewhere recently, at least I was lucky in that it was Iru getting the bulk of the weird attention. If people were like that towards my more serious characters like Reloh or Roa I think I would have combusted and collapsed into a small pile of fine powder. If people treated Loa as a Tumblr sexywoman it would have been my villain origin story. Iru is still in the space of “yes he is a real character but also I don’t always take him seriously”.

[spacetwiga]

leave c!phil out of bullshit 2k21 -- a not so tiny post by a new enthusiast

As someone who finds both common fanon and actual canon to be quite fun, I really think the general DSMP fandom would benefit greatly from a few things in general: the greatest, in my opinion, is learning to accept that popular fanon won’t usually be the canon you receive. Another, of course, is that POVs are golden, but with these two things being flimsy in being accepted, they are the major flaws that cause about 90% of the absolute messy takes that gain traction, oftentimes poisoning a canon character's ability to exist in the story.

My biggest beef regarding this comes from how y’all treat c!Phil, so here I am, being annoying on main side! 

TL;DR... Just because someone acted like like a guidance to others, doesn’t always mean that they'll want to be the father figure role for everyone that breathes. Similarly, pinning down a character on a single trope is wack, so don't be surprised if they grow away from it.

Baby’s first little dsmp rambling below!

(Warning: it's long as hell)

The Dream SMP plotline is not written out like most popular media. With so many moving parts in the form of daily streams and the wonderful tool of live improvisation, it makes perfect sense that such a giant cast would not always be on the same page. Adding onto that, it also makes more sense that a vast majority of the cast will be placed into supporting roles, as the story needs to have characters that serve as narrative anchors and others that function as the links in a chain, all weathering the storm that is the plot.

Screentime, of course, plays a major factor into canon exposure -- in terms of the Dream SMP, POV matters equally, if not more, too. 

It’s a pretty neat way of showing things, but in the end, the fanbase has a lovely (read: godawful /lh) way of analysing characters, particularly when it relates to how they interact with others from their fave character’s POV. The tendency to analyse things from a single character's POV is fine, but not when attempting to critique the greater whole of a conflict. Both sides, no matter how wrong they may seem to be, matter.

Adding onto the fact that everything is live, there are things that will spiral out of control, casual words being skewed and thus having the potential of a single line seemingly contradicting the entire ‘story’ that the fanbase has made. If it directly affects a fave's POV in particular, one is more likely to take offense, as bias immediately bars one from trying to see the other person's side of things.

POV is important. 

Which brings me to c!Phil, and how critics tend to ignore his perspective to prop up another character, or justify the tearing down of another.

Improvisation is both a blessing and a curse; the fanbase, however, loves to test out the latter. With it, the fanbase starts crafting tales to justify it...And so begins the mess that is c!Phil discourse.

Say it with me, folks: c!Phil is not supposed to be your fave’s fluffy father figure... unless you’re c!Wilbur!!!

😃☝🏾Dadza is good...👉🏾😎👉🏾 But fandom wants the excessive, idealized version.

-- birb 2k21

Family dynamics are generally loved for their potential for comfort, particularly those of a found family nature. Fandom in general tends to lean into them wholeheartedly, with most major bases having at least one prominent group present; SBI, of course, is no different. From fanart to popular fanfiction, it's arguably the biggest group dynamic alongside the Dream Team, and for that, a precedence was set. 

c!Phil, if he ever joined, would fix everything! All of the ‘kids’ would turn to their new mentor and everything would turn out fine! This all knowing, morally just character will chuckle at their antics and wacky hijinks will follow! Fun times, right? /s

The hope for it, however, has long since been shattered, and frankly, good for him!

To go a little ooc, cc!Phil has stated multiple times that, while he was friendly with a lot of the cast as c!Phil, his only paternal link (at least biologically) lies with c!Wilbur. Simple, right? It should be -- there are multiple clips of him saying this -- but fans choose to ignore it in their critiques, generally citing favouritism or downright neglect for the character’s flaws. From 'favoring' Techno (who, in canon, holds the highest link in friendship outside of c!Wilbur's familal link) to 'neglecting' to visit Tommy (who he barely knew, and also assumed, like many others, that he was fine), these critiques weigh heavily on the scale that judges Phil’s so called father figure trope. 

The story, however, has only leaned into (and persisted with) that for c!Wilbur alone, and adding onto it, there is an established acknowledgement from both ccs. That confirmation should hold the most weight, especially since both Phil and Wilbur seem alright with it. Even so, that familial has yet to be explored much for both characters, particularly regarding c!Phil, who has his debut (at least narratively) in a scene that feels opposite to the classic fatherly role.

c!Wilbur denounced accepting that helping hand to fall entirely into his explosive end, setting a precedence unlike most fatherly types arriving to save their kid. Usually, fandom narrative would love a close save, father and son uniting to heal and build up what was broken, but c!Phil’s entrance inks his story in failure. Angsty, right? We love angst!

And yet, as the story ticks on, the bad takes pile up.

Why? Well, I’l used to think that it is a “funny haha” type thing; a way to grieve for a character that was lost, as Alivebur was genuinely a great character. However, with the plot slowly progressing c!Phil’s story to evolve away from the ‘mentor the kids’ trope , I should have seen a storm on the horizon.

It should have been seen from the moment he stabbed c!Wilbur in the chest, but optimism is one hell of a smokescreen.

Built up fanon, however, is probably the greatest fog to ever exist.

There are lines before the button room confrontation that paint a picture of Wilbur seeking out the approval of his father (who seemed distant, at least from his POV), as well as hints to the SBI dynamic, but with the countless dismissals/retcons from CCs involved, as well as little to no consistent canon acknowledgement of this team dad role...Why base an entire hate piece of c!Phil just because popular fanon isn’t real? 

Why, for the sake of building up a well rounded character, would one place the title of a communal parental figure on a grieving father who has little attachment to the community involved, especially when most of them are too busy delving into their own issues?

Furthermore, why go for Mr. Philza Minecraft: Angel of Death, CEO of KEKW, Functioning Immortal????

It’s madness, luv, and frankly, antis cannot let c!Phil process any of his grief (or flesh out his character) without his contributions being fatherly. His role has been idealized to the point where he is not a character on his own, but an accessory to the happiness of other characters. That is not how the world works, and in a conflict riddled server like the dsmp, arguing that it should be like that is counterproductive.

c!Phil had his own shit to deal with, and as he slowly uncovers how fucked up the server actually was, he merely adapts to it. He learns to play the game by his own rules, and people become mad that he’s succeeding in his own way. It's as simple as that, particularly when referencing his initial exposure to the world he now inhabits.

c!Phil is a man who used to hear of his son’s success from the letters he received, words spinning tales of won revolutions and newfound friendships. To a father, those letters are more than enough to assume that all is well, and with it, he had no reason to check on his son, who was already old enough to be carving his path alone. For him to arrive and see just how broken his son actually was, and then, in front of faces he only vaguely knows, kill said son... There's a lot to take in.

He shouldn't have had to care about L'Manberg in those moments, not when he had his son in his arms, dead by his own goddamn weapon; his son who, to his knowledge, was doing pretty well up until he caught wind of his plot. Yet, he does.

He gives them the benefIt of the doubt, even ignoring the one person he has shown to have deep history with (c!Techno) to assist the nation in defeating the withers and rebuilding what was lost.

c!Phil stays in a nation that has seemingly brought his son right into his demise, holding in that grief to help people who he assumes have the chance to rebuild, to reform. For a moment, he trusts that the system can turn into something positive, offering to hunker down and do what he can to help. That’s the start of a fatherly type role for most -- with many expectations rising from fans to ‘fix’ all these traumatized characters.

In another plot, perhaps critics could have gotten the tropes they want from c!Phil, but to blame the character for reacting negatively to a world he barely knew, right after seeing it ruin his son and target a friend...Maybe the need for a "father figure" only stems from making their faves happy.

Characters that don't directly support your fave are not inherently awful characters. Critique based on that alone is...flimsy, really, but honestly, you can use to to show how they process things.

Which brings me to the events leading up to Doomsday, and with it, the steady rise of c!Phil’s defining traits.

Say it with me, folks: c!Phil is one of the most loyal members on the server, but loyalty doesn’t mean he's blindly following along!

😃☝🏾Butcher Army take this L👉🏾😎👉🏾 Found it in the L’Mancrater

-- birb 2k21

The butcher army arc, while nestled among the mainline story of Tommy’s exile (which I will not even mention, because those dadza takes about visiting may deserve a post on their own), allows for c!Phil to see into the minds of those who had once been with (or even against) his son’s plans. Sure, he may be witnessing them after the eve of their newfound traumas, but this is an important observation to make when comparing how easy it was to denounce his affiliation to them and side with c!Technoblade.

Unlike the new Administration, slowly dipping deeper and deeper into their own form of power hunger, c!Technoblade’s base desires had never wavered. His trust in others, however, had, still nursing the sting of a betrayal, but with no conflict in sight. He is reforming, finding comfort in his solitude, and still maintaining contact with those he trusts.

Techno's Compass, for one, is a major example of their mutual trust. Despite being on opposing territories, they are civil enough to trust each other, just like old friends.

Thus, when you take two old friends who are more than used to conflict -- one grieving and one betrayed, but both seeking neutrality -- it shouldn’t have surprised the antis that c!Phil would place c!Techno’s whereabouts (and life, mind you) over some government he barely knew. 

And yet, above all else, c!Phil starts off as a neutral party for everyone's sake, forgoing potential conquest for peace.

To c!Phil and c!Techno, it’s like fighting back to back, knowing that one can always trust the other to fend off those just waiting to take advantage of your blindspot, while also quelling the need to imagine your partner turning around and doing the same. That sort of friendship is forged through many, many hardships.

They betray what little trust he had built in them. That’s on them.

c!Phil is aware how untrusting c!Techno is, and while c!Techno feels safe enough to give his all for c!Phil, he never exploits it to get ahead, which is something L'Manbergians felt okay with doing.

They take a book out of the playbook used on c!Techno, for c!Techno.

They went after yet another person who was close to him, using their power and influence to hold an execution under the guise of seeking justice. If c!Wilbur, at least pre-corruption arc, sent letters to his father, one would at least expect some of his old ideals of freedom and fairness to leak through into his friends, right? To see those c!Phil assumed would hold similar ideals immediately skew towards a darker, brutal side, particularly in threatening others to get what they wanted...Well, shit hit the fan.

c!Phil does not have that strong relationship with any former L’Manbergians, and despite there being potential for such, it didn't work out that way; instead, however, those characters manage to mistake his kindness for weakness. They take his preferred neutrality as a way to exploit him, to gain in such a way that he lost agency...

No more Mister Nice Dadza, and honestly, he’s justified in that notion.

They’ve lost his trust, time too short to have gained that strong link like c!Techno’s or c!Wilbur’s, and with it, came the inevitable association with Doomsday.

c!Phil knew c!Techno’s intentions from the beginning -- which had only wavered into dormancy because he had grown tired of fighting, understanding that the cycle he wishes to break is not worth his efforts -- so the agreement in participating is effortless. 

c!Dream was there too, of course, but in their mutual quest for eradication, it’s made canon that c!Techno and c!Phil hid away most of their arsenal, despite seeming overprepared. They have no loyalty to c!Dream; they’re smart enough to play along, however. He was a means to an end.

There’s no lies present in their relationship; c!Phil needed someone who didn’t try and pull wool over his eyes, and c!Techno let him see.

c!Techno needed someone who wouldn't stab him in the back, and c!Phil stayed true as his hidden sword.

Which is why, as the two joined forces, ideals aligning and power synergized, they didn’t think twice about nuking the nation to bedrock. Mutually agreeing that the system needs to die, they did what they could, and they succeeded.

How cool of them, tbh LMAO.

New L’Manberg tugged too hard at the sleeping tiger’s tail; they shouldn’t have expected it to roll over.

Their openness to each other was known.

There was no need for underhanded plays, for hidden betrayals, for undisclosed words.

Their loyalties were strong.

They were in sync.

In conclusion (maybe, maybe not...this shit is long holy heck)

😃☝🏾 I may hate this analysis in 30 minutes👉🏾😎👉🏾 Or I may make a part 2. Fuck it!

-- birb 2k21

And that’s what makes c!Phil an interesting character: He tends to be critiqued in reference to chatacters who have very well wronged him, have no affiliation to him or get associated to him through popular fanon. There's a lot to cover that I haven't (from Ghostbur to the whole Tommy 'dilemna') but overall I'm digging what I have now and if I ever get more energy, I'll continue!

c!Phil enthusiasts, I hope I did you proud LMAO. It's my first forray into this side of tumblr 👉🏾👈🏾 I'm a lurker.

c!Phil antis, you can either act respectful or go argue with a wall. I got experience dealing with antis on Tumblr; I am immune to BS.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed. Signing off!

- BIRB.

[nomchonks]

i have to talk about the cannibal discourse

so, first off, i think twitter user/professional storyboard artist batshaped is creepy. for me there is a simultaneous fascination/repulsion with her artwork. i first discovered her through her animal crossing fanart, which is as well-drawn as all of her stuff. her style is very cartoony and expressive and i want to keep looking at it, but the content is, uh. 

for example her AC fanart is centered around office cat Raymond being delighted at getting punched in the face by fellow cat Katt. it really horns him up so there are wacky antics where he tries to get her to punch him in the face/step on him etc, because she’s not really that into it. i think it’s the combination of cutesy child-friendly characters, kink, and coercion that i find, frankly, disgusting. imagine if it was a series of comics about Raymond trying to take creepshots of Katt’s feet. 

anyway i just dont follow her on twitter so it’s nbd. but then she gets outed as a cannibal.

actually what transpired is that she occasionally posts about wanting to try human meat, and this last time people decided to cancel her for it. i dont know if she recently crossed the threshold of number of followers that made her an OK target to pile on or what.

actually before i knew about the pile on i had seen a different tweet from her and decided to check out her timeline because like i said, im drawn to her work. i saw this exchange.

my response was complete disgust. the combination of the way she describes human meat and the least funny joke ive ever seen in my frickin life is just. ugh. i think i kind of hate this lady.

but anyway i still dont follow or interact with her in anyway so i just stopped looking at her timeline and went on my way. i didnt know there as backlash until i saw her tweets reposted by an artist on my timeline.

the discourse going on in her mentions is a mess. there is:

1) arguing back and forth about whether it is unhealthy/dangerous to consume human meat

2) arguing back and forth about whether it’s immoral or not to consume donated human meat (batshaped calls herself an “aspiring ethical cannibal”)

3) arguing back and forth about whether or not batshaped is joking

for number 1, whether or not human meat is safe to eat is not a good basis for giving someone grief over being a cannibal, because bad shit is a regular part of most people’s diets. number 2 is just a really boring conversation im not interested in (my problem with her tweets is they make me uncomfortable, not that i think they make her a bad person). but number 3 kind of baffles me.

there’s a contradiction in saying “my friend always eats weird meat, but is joking about eating human meat.” it’s not a joke! she really wants to eat human meat! and that’s fine (maybe, again i dont care about that discussion). 

anyway when it comes down to it it’s absurd that people are harassing her and trying to get her fired for being an aspiring cannibal. i understand the backlash for her saying nasty gross shit, but people need to learn about the unfollow/block buttons before making the leap to “she draws really detailed teeth so she’s probably a child predator.”

[ronsenburg]

8,6,7,5,3, and 9!

3: Describe yourself as if you were a character in a novelShe existed within a strange bubble of contradictions that never seemed fully settled. She spent exorbitant amounts of money on things like hair care, clothes, and makeup, but spent most of her days lounging around under blankets on her couch in oversized sweaters and messy buns with a dog curled in a tight ball on her lap. A perfectionist first and foremost, she was so afraid of failing that she often preferred never to try in the first place and, instead, appear to the world like an unmotivated slacker —-

Never mind, I’m taking this way too seriously kldjflksdjfkjsf

5: Name one place you would never want to go to:This is such a tough one! I think that going anywhere can be amazing with the right kind of planning or people to show you around, but I guess… Antarctica? Even for science reasons. I am NOT a big fan of cold weather or vast stretches of nothingness.

6: What was a weird thing you did as a child?I used to subject my family to very long “shows” that I would spend literal weeks building sets and planning dance numbers for. Imagine cardboard boxes with construction paper taped to it with really bad drawings scribbled on it. I’d rope my little brothers into performing with me, but I’d change my mind so many times about the songs we were singing or the dance routines that they usually ended up as bad, 8 year old improv while my brothers just stood next to me giving me serious side eye. My grandma usually cut me off after an hour.

7: Describe a memorable dream you’ve had.I had this crazy dream last night that I was being psychologically tortured by some bad dude who kind of looked like Kristoph Gavin? He literally kept putting me in these insane situations where I had to make difficult moral decisions that put either myself or a series of strangers in danger. I kept trying to run away from him, but it was set in the 1800s and I had so little autonomy as a woman that people kept telling him where I’d gone and then the cycle would start again. And I woke up and laid in bed for, like, an hour after wondering if I had made the right choices and if he really would have killed the people he threatened to. It was messed up. 8. What’s something that would make you really happy?I wrote something really heavy here first, BUT I’M GOING TO ERASE IT AND SAY INSTEAD- drabble prompts, HC requests, messages about fandom stuff, comments on my fcs, fanart of my fics, messages from my mutuals, ALL THAT STUFF IS THE BEST ILU GUYS.

9: Describe your best friend without mentioning body features or personality traits:Unpaired socks left in strange places about the apartment, subscriptions to finance magazines that pile up in the corner of the bathroom without ever having been read, a collection of fine glassware that you might find in an upscale restaurant collecting dust in cabinets, the sound of unrestrained laughter and off-key singing echoing from the other room, strong coffee and hastily penned love notes waiting on the kitchen table in the morning. Warm comforters, unconditional acceptance, love.

oddly specific asks

[nightjarring]

fffffgck fuck i like looking through tags of ppl who reblog my art and I've noticed some stuff surrounding stuff that's small yeah but it's consistent and I've been making stuff for the same thing for myself based 100% on the thing as i interpreted it (and also + joax w fremb) and i was sorta relaxed about making fanart 4 this 4 like, almost the exact opposite reason im relaxed about making pokémon fanart in that everyone's done so much different stuff that it feels like there isnt any expectation or mold 2 break and with this i figured there wouldnt b any potential letdown bc i wasnt aware of any preconceived stuff i thought ittt was just music and drawing stuff based on how i interpreted the plots/implied characters couldn't really contradict anything so im good im fine but no nope i was wrong fuck fuck i hate anxiety yes i realize this is incredibly irrational but hey yeah im just gonna go lie in some dirt for a while. I'll b in my dirt pile, if u need me. Fretting.

[ivorywreathablaze]

I have wanted to fill out this meme for literal years, and after months, I’m finally done! It's posted in its all-together form on my deviantArt page.

Original meme here.

1: As usual when I start working on a ‘me’ character, by the time I finished working on her she was no longer me, lol (I have no particular fondness for poinsettias). Gifted to me here.

2 & 3: Kazumi Yoshida haters will be blocked on sight (joking, you’ll only be blocked if you’re rude about it).

4: “I find the Aizen siblings more annoying, but they are also harder to draw,” I said, and then proceeded to struggle with the lighting lollll.

5: I should clarify I haven’t read the Light Novels entirely, but from what I have read then this is what I’ve gleaned. (Thank you Poor Man Translation and Baka-Tsuki translators!) As for the ship themselves, I can and have made rants about how much I love my OTP and they’re perfect for each other, so I decided to spare you and just give a summary of how I interpret their canon relationships.

6: I made their eyes too big, and forgot to write that he knows it’s romantic because of the expensiveness of the chocolate + the mysterious note attached (which I also forgot to draw. lol) . . . BUT! I still really like this. I should make more little comics with them. For more info on Valentines Day in Japan watch this Youtube Short.

7: . . . I may have already sketched some things for this AU, haha!

8: I think Keisaku would have some trouble with understanding all of Outlaw’s terminology when he first starts working for them.

9: With the second question, after having re-read the manga it seems like time doesn’t stop—but I’m still curious about how this is perceived! Do teachers end up not teaching certain classes? Has anyone ever been fired over work they weren’t able to do because they were in a seal? If not, why?

10: I don’t like tagging people, so just do it if you’re interested!

[ivorywreathablaze]

Recent sketches!

[ivorywreathablaze]

Happy New Years day!

Sortof a followup to the Christmas picture.

[ivorywreathablaze]

Happy belated Valentines day! I didn’t think I was gonna post for the holiday until I remembered this picture, so today is a good enough excuse to post it, because I like the way it turned out.

[ivorywreathablaze]

Merry belated Christmas!

Please don’t expect anything of this quality to come from me ever again lol

[ivorywreathablaze]

O T P

I have finally given up on having an avatar for my profile pic. Have some Khamsin x Kazumi instead

Oh, and Kazumi’s hair is long because from the short story ‘Future,’ it seems like she’s growing it out. So they’re both older here