#my current work is way too toxic good work don't get praised

[ilikedetectives]

I think the interview went well. The recruiter sent me an application form after so I guess that's a good sign?

[marilynthornhilllover]

can you please make a fanfic we’re Larissa dies like in the show then wife reader makes and attends the funeral, but when she gets home she realizes that the front door to her and Larissa’s home was unlocked so she goes in slowly but she sees Larissa at the kitchen table drinking wine and Larissa says something like “miss me darling” and then some smut if you want. ❤️💋

Filthy love

Larissa weems x Fem reader

Warning: Angst, grief, sadness, slight anger, pain, lots of talk about depression, faking of death, smut, fingering, cunniligus, usage of toys such as : vibrator and strap, slight choking, kinda soft sex, praise kink, stalker kink if you squint, slight mommy kink, slight degradation kink.

A/n: I just want to say a HUGE THANK YOU to all of you who got me to 1,005 followers!! I'm so so so grateful and happy. I'm looking forward to continue writing fanfics for you all, thank you for interacting with my work and blog and simply liking my content and i am blessed to have each and everyone of you on board with me, sending love to you all also I hope you enjoy this 1k following special fanfic 👀💖.

There wasn't enough words in the English dictionary to describe the pain and emptiness that you were feeling as you stood over larissa's closed casket. There were no more tears left to cry. All you felt was emptiness, a never ending suffocating cycle of pure sadness, filled with rage. They say death has no sting and that it sneaks up on you and it's absolutely true. Nothing compares to what you felt currently.

You couldn't feel anything, you couldn't hear anything. It's like being trapped in the middle of the ocean with no air yet your still not exactly drowning, you don't want to drown but you refuse to be rescued out of the toxicity of the air.

You felt utterly numb. It's as if you too weren't alive, like a part of you died with her, and is to stay forever buried with her. Soon you'll have to thrown the first batch of sand on her grave, plant flowers two months later, listen to people express their condolences and state how larissa was a ' sunshine in a word filled with gloom'. Correct - absolutely correct. She was your sunshine in your world of gloom.

Truth be told you didn't deserve larissa - Or maybe larissa didn't deserve you. You'd always argue, she'd always stay at work. Nothing was simple, everything was so complicated behind the thick walls of your home. Fake bright smiles where somtimes even the Toothpaste couldn't clean the disgusting words you'd both spit at eachother behind close doors just to apologize minutes after with kept hatred inside.

It's as if you weren't there, but she was still here. It's not possible. She no longer existed and you wished you could swap places. She died so you can live but really and truly you didn't want to be here either.

The word is toxic and exhausting and larissa kept things joyful for you, always ready to sacrifice her happiness to see you smile. The memories of the good kept attacking your brain, handing in return instant headaches.

The first time you both laid eyes on eachother.

The time she asked you out on your first ever date.

The time she asked you to be her girlfriend.

The time she proposed.

The time she asked you to move in.

Right until the day you both said ' I do' the only soft, truthful words to ever be said to eachother. Maybe if larissa was here she offered up her happiness. You felt everything at once. It was all overwhelming. You wanted to be no where and here at the same time. The sadness you felt inside was unbearable yet no tears dared to escape..... they all stayed dried.

With a sigh you sniffed and made your way towards your seat, sitting besides Wednesday you flicked a warm smile towards her, you weren't sure if it was quite excalty warm though, after all your warmth was laying with her hands on her chest in a small, itchy casket. Larissa hated small spaces, if she was alive she wouldn't even be lying there now..... and that's how you knew she's really dead.

Because in the back of your head, there was a part of you that believed this was all a joke and that maybe thos was all a cruel prank to be played.

" are you ok?" You turned to look at the small girl besides you, forcing a smile you nodded. She definitely didn't believed you, to be honest who would?. Calling your heart broken would be an understatement, you don't know how celion dion sang that song because your heart definitely will not be going on without larissa. If you could have took her hand in death you would have.

"Til death do us part"

Wednesday truly cared for larissa, under her tough goth act there laid a heart of gold for the sapphire, Elsa blond hair and beautifully paled skin beauty.

You were once again broken from your trance as the pastor began to do his speech.

This you realized was your Roman empire, your own wife's death. You should really he celebrating her life but she hardly enjoyed her life. She was too tied up with work and you being on her back 24/7 percent of the time. She wasn't allowed space to breathe, well now she has more than enough.

After the pastor was done doing his speech you stepped on stage to say your urology - your last words. Taking a steady breath, and a long exhale you positioned the paper infront of you on the podium as you tried your best not to allow the tears their accompanied time frame.

" firstly, i want to thank you all for truly being here today so that we can honor our beloved and bright spark, Larissa Weems..... larissa was many things.... she was a principal, to some a English teacher. She was a daughter, a lover, a role model etc but t-to." You sighed as you looked down steading out your breath as your voice broke.

" to me larissa was much more than that in my life. I was a field of dead flowers before I met larissa, a-and she was like the sun that came out, bringing both warmth and healing into my life. She was and will forever be my hero that wore heels and my sunlight that brighten and made my life and day better. S-she never failed to make me smile or laugh, even giggle. I know to many of you she was so much more than just a sun.... she was the entire world even universe. And as we lay her to rest today I hope we all find the time to heal and be storng, because that's who larissa was, storng....."

Everyone sniffed, some clapped, most breaking down in tears. You never ment for anyone to shed even more tears or for any hearts to be broken any more than they already were you just needed everyone to find peace just as much as you wanted to find it as well.

After the funeral was over you hugged everyone goodbye and wished them a safe drive home as you also headed home, already planning to sleep because you couldn't accept the pain that you will feel after arriving home and realizing the house is empty.

As you pulled into the driveway you noticed the door looked pushed open. You weren't in the correct headspace but you knew for sure weren't crazy, you remember closing and locking the door perfectly well after leaving. After switching off the car and getting out you carefully walked up to the house - the mansion.

You fired all employees for three months with pay since you needed the time and house for yourself to simply be human and do human things which in this situation will be to grieve. Upon arrival you inspected the door before pushing it open and stepping inside slowly. If there was an intruder you'd rather catch them in the act, then call the police.

" hello?? Who's there? I suggest you just surrender now or I won't hesitate to call the cops on yo-" as you rounded the corner of the kitchen you saw larissa sitting on top of the countertop with her heels long forgotten on the carpet of the dinning room chair. Her lipstick was smudge as her legs swinged back and forth. She looked...... well not dead obviously. You knew for sure you weren't dreaming and she definitely looked very alive.

She moaned softly as she finished her wine and placed the glass down ontop the counter with a small cling. She sighed as a smirk was quickly painted across her face. You didn't know how to react. Maybe you should scream and run for your life, be happy and joyful or to maybe stay sad just incase this was your own mind manipulating you into a maladaptive dream land trance.

" hello darling....." She spoke in a low husky voice as her eyes flicked up towards yours, they were dark and swirling with desires for many things - things that you knew of and knew not of.

" did you miss me?" She asked as her eyebrows quirked up in a teasing manner. Your body stayed frozen as she jumped off of the counter and strides towards you very slowly. Her hips swayed as the smirk remained on her face. You could hear your rapid heartbeat in your chest with every closer step she took towards you, not breaking eye contact nor curving her lips into a non - smirk.

She finally stopped right infront of you as she tilted her head to the side, inspecting your face, possibly trying her best to read your every emotion as well as she can. As you looked into her eyes you saw, warmth, passion, love, peace, joy, everything that made larissa unique was swirling around in her sapphire iris, you felt your connection spark that you had with her ignite as her hands made their way around your waist pulling you flush against her body.

" I'm alive, my love. Long story but right now I think I'd rather cherish you" she whispered against your earlobe, gently pressing a kiss towards your neck before leaning back to look at your face, but again it remained blank because you did not have any reactions or emotions lingering on your face or in your eyes. It's like you were a statue, frozen before time.

Larissa chuckled softly, her hands making their upwards your chest Slightly grouping your breast making a moan escape your from the back of your throat. She grinned as she pushed you up against the counter. Despite all odds and questions that needed to be asked about everything that happened you needed her badly, she was like a drug that you needed desperately to live. You grabbed her cheeks and forced her lips against yours.

It took her by surprise but she quickly kissed back with the same equal amount of passion. You opened your mouth and gaved her access as she gladly took it by slipping in her tongue and using it to her advantage. Her hands traveled down your body wildly as she squeezed your ass and grabbed your hips harshly as she picked you up and took you to the bedroom.

She kicked the door open with her feet as she switched on the lamp light before throwing you onto the bed aggressively. She crawled up towards you and reconnected both your lips again in a heated, sloppy desperate kiss that spoke so much words that the lips could never utter.

You helped her take off her clothing as she helped you in return.

" fuck I need to taste you darling" she mumbled before spreading your thighs apart and smirking. She bit her bottom lip as she admired your baby pink lace panties before proceeding to pulling it to the side. She groaned as she saw your arousal spreaded all around your cunt as your puffy clit stared back at her. Larissa wasted no time as she enveloped her mouth onto your small bud immediately setting a fast sucking pace.

Your mouth fell open in a silent cry as your hands immediately flew to her hair pulling her even closer.

" your so fucking delicious darling" she purred as the vibrations from her speech made your shiver. Larissa used her hands to hold your thighs open to prevent you from squirming and bucking your hips as her tongue flicked back and forth against your clit in a rapid pace.

" f-fuck, larissa, I'm gonna cum." You whispered as she chuckled darkly, her hot breath on your cunt was driving you crazy. She knew fully well what she was doing to you. Your stomach twisted as you felt larissas fingers trace slow steady circles around your entrance that caused your back to arch.

" so needy for mommy huh baby, you need me to be alive to fuck you senseless" your brain began to get fuzzy, the effect larissa had on you was dangerous - deadly dangerous. Your grip in her hair tighten as your nails digged deeper into her scalp. Your eyes rolled back as she continued to violate your clit endless in the most oragam way possible.

You felt the knot in your stomach tied as it was ready to explode. Your other free hand gripped the sheets as you swore you were gonna leave holes in it.

" such a dirty slut for mommy darling" she cooed as she slowly thrusted her two slender fingers into you at once before pulling them out, and that was all it took before you cummed in her mouth. She removed her lips from your abused bud as she gently kissed it before leaving open mouth kisses on your hot sweaty skin all the way up to your lips.

She watched as you tried to catch your breath as you gently shivered.

" I'm not done yet princess" she whispered before leaning over towards the side table and pulling open the drawer, her hand rumbled around in there for a while before a pink clip on button vibrator cake evident in your eyes. Larissa smirked before snaking her way back down to your pussy. She took both sides of your underwear and pulled it down as you lifted your hips to assist her.

You spread your legs even wider for her. She looked up at you with an evil expression before attaching the vibrator to your sensitive clit. As soon as she turned on the button you collapsed onto the bed in pleasure. You moaned as her hand wrapped around your neck. She leaned down closely to your face, her lips ghosting yours. You leaned in to place a kiss onto her lips but she pulled away chuckling.

" such a needy little girl, letting me do what I want with her needy cunt" you gasped as she slipped her two slender fingers into your cunt, your eyes rolled back as you let out a sigh of satisfaction. You could hear as her fingers went in and out of your wet cunt with squelching noises and your sweet moans and whimpers for her. You were her bitch to fuck.

Her hold on your neck tighten even more as her pace picked up to something more brutal. You cried out as she curled her fingers in you, hitting your sweet spot over and over again that had you going dumb for her and crying. She loved the way your greedy cunt clench led down around her fingers. Your hips rocked back and forth desperate to meet her thrust.

" Come on darling, cum again for me" she cooed as she picked up her pace, pushing her fingers deeper into you lr cunt past knuckle length.

" OH GOD! MOMMY! P-PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE, NEED IT SO BAD" you screamed as larissa pinched your nipple before slapping it, feeling as your body quirked and trashed beneath her, as your cunt spasms around her fingers. You wanted to try to hold off your oragsm a little while longer, not wanting to seem ' truly desperate ' as a whore who just needed her pussy fucked every second of the day by her wife but you simply couldn't.

" I know you want to" she whispered in a sultry voice, and that was the end of you. Your back arched as you let out the most pornographic moan ever to be heard as you coated larissas fingers with your cream. She continued to fuck you through your oragsm until you couldn't take the overstiumlation anymore. She removed her fingers and cleaned them off with her tongue, keeping her eyes on you.

The way her tongue swirled around her everyone finger, licking up your juices that ran down her hand made your cunt throb. You gulp as you cleared your throat.

" I wanna ride you" you spoke lowly and larissa scoffed.

" go on, get the strap then you can fuck yourself on mommy big cock, maybe if we're lucky I can put a baby in you, get you all full and round with my baby" she groaned.

the thought along had you sprinting towards the closest to get the biggest strap with the most deepest curve possible.

And with this you knew tonight was going to be a very very long night....... hopefully one with pleasure and maybe when that's finished you can get the answers you deserve, because you didn't deserve all that pain and heartache.

[asgardian--angels]

just rewatched steven universe future (and the movie) and I just gotta say.

I still have no idea why fandom was so upset about the show, why opinion turned against it, or anything. I didn't understand it then, I don't understand it now. I've enjoyed every single minute of that show, start to finish, all iterations. A show hasn't left me sobbing like that in a hell of a long time. It handles heavy, dark emotional topics with incredible finesse and heart in a way that all of us could learn from. It remains one of the most aesthetically beautiful animated series I've ever seen, and the soundtrack is so incredibly moving. I'll never get why shows with the most hopeful themes, like this one, end up with the nastiest 'fans' that harass creators and artists for making something that encourages us to be kind to each other. like, insert good omens meme i guess, yknow? but I will always love this series (the OG, the film, and Future). I'm glad I was never really involved with the fandom back when it was airing so I didn't have to hear any of the shit that people were tossing around. But knowing that this series basically got thrown to the wind after it was done airing - like, no one even talks about it anymore, as if there were some Game of Thrones effect WHEN THERE WASN'T - breaks my heart. It was so incredibly influential, for animation, for queer representation, for creativity in art, and for helping a lot of people feel seen and teaching us a better way to be towards our fellow human beings. I don't know who the fuck can be angry about this show, but whoever they are, I feel sorry for them that they have nothing better in their lives than to be senselessly cruel to people who are trying to make the world a kinder place.

anyone out there who hasn't watched Steven Universe before, and maybe was intimidated or put off by how it's talked about on here, please don't listen to that. It's one of the best made series, animated or not, in the modern age. It touches people of all ages. It inspires hope, and forgiveness, and working towards a better world. It has incredible character development, intergenerational trauma, dismantling colonialism, the horrors and fallout of war, xenobiology, troubled families, damaged people trying to grow and find new meaning, building community, nature vs nurture, perfectly done slow-burn plot arcs and reveals, and an art style that's so gorgeous you'll mourn the current state of the industry that stifles creativity like this. And it does all of this so profoundly and intelligently that it defies summary. Give it a try.

That's all I'll say. I never post about the show anymore bc I'm not a part of the fandom and I don't know how active it is on here anymore. But I've always cared deeply for Steven Universe and I always will. I hope outside of the insular bubble of toxic online fandom that it continues to have a steady mainstream following. Rebecca Sugar deserves accolades and a big thank you for bringing this show into the world. I'm sure she did not get a fraction of the praise she should have, and instead had to endure endless vitriol. The bar's always too high for some people who want something to be mad at, who want to blame and hate instead of supporting the few brave artists out there trying to make queer shows and pave the way for the future. The enemy of queer rep is so often queer fandom spaces themselves. Let's not let this life-changing show fade into obscurity if we can. It was groundbreaking in so many ways. It brought joy and hope to so many. I hope new people will continue to watch it and be uplifted by it, as I have all these years.

[sunflowerdigs]

Interested by what you said about Mencken killing a Roy kid, can you elaborate?

That was just something I threw out there. I don't think Roman is in any danger of Mencken actually killing him, that wouldn't make sense with the story. But what I meant is that the power dynamic between Roman and Mencken would be fundamentally different than that between him and Gerri or him and Brex, if anything sexual were to occur between them.

Roman doesn't like boundaries and safe words because he's looking for a certain realism in his bdsm encounters. He wants to feel like he is actually being abused by someone who actually doesn't care about him. However. In the situations with Brex and Gerri, i think Roman's money and status were unspoken "safe words" for him. He told Brex that if he ever actually got hurt, he would call a bunch of lawyers to sue him. Gerri knew that if she hurt Roman too badly, he might turn on her and she'd lose her job. Roman was therefore able to safely submit to both of them. I also think that Roman purposefully chose people who seemed either affable or who kind of liked him. What he really needs from these encounters, imo, is praise and acceptance for passivity, for simply being himself and lying there, taking the abuse. But he can't accept that yet, he's too full of self-loathing to deal with aftercare. So, I think the "aftercare" in these encounters was both the trainer and Gerri continuing to work with him after seeing him in the weakened, passive state. Gerri continued to believe he could be a good exec and Brex continued to believe he could build his body up; neither found him a waste of time. At least...that's my guess. Idk.

Anyway, Logan is dead, and even if he wasn't, because Mencken is an even worse narcissistic autocrat than Logan, he's never felt beholden to the old guy ("I think you could use our push" "I think you could use mine"; he delivered the Coke but he did it in a way that made it impossible for Logan to drink, due to the rules of toxic masculinity - he kissed it. You can't just drink a Coke another dude has kissed, that's gay! Of course, Roman drank it anyway, lol...). On top of that, he's currently much more valuable to ATN and WR than Roman is. He's their presidential candidate, not a nobody employee they can piss off and get rid of on a whim. There is no safety net with Mencken - under him, Roman becomes NRPI. If Mencken hurts Roman and Roman tries to sue or expose him, Roman will be stopped. WR will buy, bury, or twist the story, and then wreck Roman in the press.

So...that's kind of what I meant. Hope that made sense.

[fareehaandspaniards]

Thank you for the tag, @fantomette22!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

4 rn, one of them in progress

2. What's your total A03 words count?

30 871 yeah! Will be more, when I will continue my current fic!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Only Bloodborne last few months.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Не все равно

Ты останешься со мной

Соловей

Видения моря (0 KUDOS LOL. My poor self-care smut written in russian D:)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Not always. On my account on a russian web-site Ficbook I got much comments on my old fics, mostly responded. I do not respond, when comments are toxic or just don't need an answer

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Current one will be angsty one! But I don't know, even if my ending is angsty, there is always thread of hope for a better

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Lol... It wasn't on AO3 and it wasn't about Bloodborne. I made truly a happy ending for my beloved character from Warhammer! But of those I have on AO3 it's "Видения моря" because no one left sad there..... both sides liked what happened and do not try to act otherwise........ Phahahahah

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Once, not on AO3. I had like 66 fics there, and yeah, the largest one got some hate! Some people don't like fairytales, but nobody makes them read like 40 chapters, but they still do it and get mad :^)

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Yeah, I write it sometimes. When I get the right mood (level of horniness is too high). Actually wiriting sex scenes is a good way of characterization, and I take it seriously, especially if it's not self-care fic (a self-care fic is more about your own preferences in a character behaviour). Every detail of a character's actions is told by their habits, tastes, childhood, relations with others, mood and etc. Every word matters!

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

No. I wrote one 8 years ago. It was angsty. And funny a bit. For a fandom Amnesia The Dark Descent x Warhammer

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No lol WHO in the world needs it (if it happened, I don't know about it)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No! D: I use too many words thst are difficult to translate, I don't know how to deal with them...

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

I don't know..... Too many ships I was OBSESSED with...

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

There is one old wip. But I know I will never finish it! My try to put OCs into a Warhammer universe. It was quite good try! Wonderful, actually! But no mood and bad time in life stopped my work...

16. What are your writing strengths?

Many people told me I have cool, "alive" dialogues. Also sincere feelings of my characters, that's what I was praised for! And good language.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I have a rule. One day = one chapter, until fic is finished. If this rule is failed, writing will be tough... (That's why I have only one not finished fic)

Wiriting only when I have LOTS of inspiration, right mood and characters "talking" in my head, otherwise no, I just can't.

I rarely can detalize environment, it's too hard sometimes! And I got so invested in feelings, so later there is no space for describing environment... So I skip it, when it's not necessary xd

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

No, cringe for those who knows that language xd Better just mention another language and not write what characters are saying, if main char doesn't understand them.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Katekyo Hitman Reborn xddddd Anime of my teen age!

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

"Тень крыла на твоём челе" for Warhammer fandom. And actually "Не все равно" with Damicolash on AO3 which was written not so long ago! Sometimes I re-read both of them

[stackslip]

Love hearing you speak on Roman so much like you get him!!

The man is leaking with paranoia and abandonment issues barely holding himself together with the title in his hand. Underneath the facade he shows, the manipulation, the gaslighting and the overall abuse he has been perpetuating he's just a man who's been rejected time and time again. From his peers,his family and the audience. He's gotten what so many have coveted but its empty and hollow. I'm interested in seeing how his character will progress after wrestlemania. Will people question his tribal chief title? Will he break down? How will the dynamics with his family members change? Honestly I'm waiting for Seth-Roman confrontation because it will be so ough

Side note but it's also really funny that he always gets betrayed by similar people like Seth,Sami and Jey. My little headcanon is that he lets his guard down with more light hearted people like Jey & Sami as a result of his Shield days. Roman to me is just in his own wrestling time loop lmao.

Feel free to ignore my gushing but your posts have been making me think of him more :]

YES HAHA YES the reason i talk about him so much outside of like, special interest, IS because there's like three, four people on tumblr max speaking of his character and the storyline and actually exploring the meat of it instead of like............. hoping Big Samoan Daddy Wins Again so they can write self inserts or whatever. like i see so many people talk about punk with such passion and it's great and i'm also like look i know he's the big face of wwe and you don't care to see much of him but that's a shame bc what he and the rest of the bloodline have been doing is incredible, bar some missteps and longer lulls in the story. i agree that so much of his current character stems from a deep fear of rejection and a history of abandonment/betrayal from both other wrestlers and the audience itself, it's what makes him so tragic to watch and also so fascinating. like roman. buddy! by setting up such a horrifically abusive dynamic you're literally setting yourself up for people to leave you kicking and screaming, triggering the abandonment issues even more!

i know people have been complaining about his schedule in recent months (which imo stem more from like wwe management + irl stuff we're not privy too--it's important to remember that joe anoa'i's cancer isn't gone and it never will be, it's under constant management and he's mentioned having to switch treatments and their negative effects before) and tbh it has its issues, but i've enjoyed how...... pathetic he's been since jey left him. people have bitched about how diminished he feels, but i think it's 200% on purpose? after he wins matches now he doesn't walk around smugly like a final boss, he clings to his belt and goes to paul almost like a child seeking praise and reassurance. he cant win without solo and jimmy anymore but he doesn't like or trust them nor does he rely on them. he's terrified of solo and despises jimmy. currently the bloodline is in tatters, a shadow of its former self, and that's why it works!

the rock's inclusion, as much as i think it was a pivot, could be a real interesting way to mix things up after mania. for one i think that the only good decision rn is for roman to lose that damn title. he's been playing it this way for months now--the title feels like something he's clinging to, he has no control except for this! but it's interesting that during the press conference, the bloodline family tree named the rock as "high chief" which implies he's above roman in the hierarchy. and like. this is a toxic, shitty hierarchy! the twins were literally given to roman to do as he pleased bc he pulled rank on them, and this is unambiguously presented as something deeply abusive and a terrible state of affairs. the rock could do the same with roman!

so there are two things i'm hoping from roman post-mania, hopefully one or other other, or one after the other. this is assuming that he not only loses the titles, but that solo and rock tried to interfere only for roman's army of exes (now all cody's boyfriends) to get in there and stop that from happening.

the first thing i'd be interested in is roman sinking to whole new pathetic depths, to be stripped of what's left of his mystique until he's just a wounded mad king who cannot get over his kingdom being ash and dust. attacking others savagely (or pathetically failing to do so and being beaten the shit out of), others taking revenge after years of him dominating wwe in the same way the guys on raw tried to go after jey, and *especially* a potential feud with seth where the two are really at each other's throats, with seth confronting the monster he created and roman blaming him as the architect of his misfortunes, an easy target, something he can lash onto. i need him to lose that HARD and tragically. i need him to break and shatter to the point where the audience feels uncomfortable and even somewhat sad for him, same for seth.

the second thing i want to see is the rock pulling rank as high chief and roman, unconsciously or not, being relegated to the role jey used to be. rock proved in that conference he could do lowkey intimidating and more subtle acting that's not steeped in attitude era dramatics or flashiness, and wwe is playing on the idea that he and triple h are fighting for control behind the scenes in kayfabe. rock pushing roman out of the head of the table and roman slowly realizing what's happening as rock begins scolding and mocking him for not living up to what the family expect of him, progressively realizing he's going through what he put jey through (especially the manipulation and physical/mental abuse)--this would be a great way to eventually turn him face and build sympathy from the audience. it's gonna be HARD getting that sympathy, in part bc roman was such a charismatic heel and seeing him sink so low--it will def be harder to pull this off with him than with sami, the eternal underdog. but i think if they play it right they can have roman gradually realize the dynamics of the family are themselves hell, how much he contributed to it, and maybe others can reach out to him and try to tell him to get out. maybe even seth himself, or cody if he's still face, or sami. jey i'm hesitating on--i think it would work but only if he's yelling at roman to wake the fuck up and realize what this is at all. they would REALLY have to work for this, and it would take months if not a full year for it to actually be able to build to a face turn where roman would be *actually cheered*. i think it could work against the rock himself, now the authority over wwe, with roman having to make active amends with old enemies and gain forgiveness from people like jey and sami through active work. and it could inevitably lead to the roman/rock match they wanted so so bad. but i'd love a war games where roman isn't at the center, but has to learn to be part of an actual team and is struggling to not be at the center of the universe anymore. again this would be assuming wwe doesn't fuck it up and there aren't unplanned injuries or other plans. but to me it would be the most satisfying way to complete roman's arc--make him turn face *naturally*, and have him finally FINALLY receive the crowd's cheers and love after a lot of deserved work.

[yunwooz]

Sorry I just saw that post, I now scrolled and saw where was all coming from! About Eden I understand you, I actually said in my post between parenthesis that it still was obviously bad so we actually thought the same😅

And for the rest I didn't say that was the only reason, that's why I said "to say one", as in just an example of other things. Also, I don't think they are mistreating them nor not doing things like the examples you put on purpose (not saying you are), but instead it all comes from a reason: not having time and also bc of planning it for another moment on purpose for marketing reasons like release this thing in another key moment bc it will have more good response(but I wouldn't agree either, I would like them to have freedom without thinking if what's the best moment to do whatever). Which is the root they need to change and put of their part. I get that the guys themselves are workaholics and love their job and also said like Mingi once that even if they don't like it they are freelance so their type of job requires them to work a lot but they still should put boundaries...I don't think there is malicious intent and I can't generalize the company either. Idk, I think is a bigger problem than that from Korea in general (tho can name more countries), of the toxic hussle culture, praising effort and passion to the point of not sleeping much and working a lot..Like, you can see this everywhere including the guys so it's hard to change a whole system and specially in such a competitive world that forces both KQ and the guys to work that much and having to put even more effort bc of being a smaller company, they truly can't afford to stop. But! They still should say no to some things and find other ways bc that's not going to be sustainable long term, everyone involved including the staff that the guys said they even worked even more than them is going to burn out so bad sooner or later🫠

But I'm assuming they will eventually manage that? I mean they will be forced to do it bc.. But also they may thought that once they reach the level of Fame they want they will be able to stop more but that's not going to happen bc they will have to maintain the fame and all that, bts Is the best example. So idk, I hope they find a way seriously😮‍💨

i honestly and truly think that kq are simply terrible at managing ateez well and properly, so yeah i don't think they're intentionally robbing certain members of opportunities but rather they don't manage ateez's time well enough or take enough care to cater to each member's interests and talents well enough either. there most definitely is that toxic hussle culture you mention prevalent all throughout kpop and this mindset of having to move fast and quick as though there's a timer counting down on them and their time as a group. however, i think kq must realize sooner rather than later that with the way they're currently pushing ateez, it's not feasible for them to be able to continue long term solely on account of burnout, mental fatigue, or physical fatigue. i'm not saying they should stop completely but rather slow down for a time. they've got plenty of money. the tours have made them a huge amount of money. ateez pretty much singlehandedly pulled kq out of debt and funded a great deal of other projects kq is doing too, not speaking from a point of bias but from what market reports have shown in recent years. i think they're got enough money to slow down on world tours, festivals, and things like kcon appearances as well.

i also really believe that kq is wildly understaffed still to this day bc they want to maintain the 'family-like' mentality of the company. kq could really make good use of a social media manager, a bigger team of stylists, and certainly more higher-ups who specialize and understand business really well. and i feel like they should have already managed that by this point in time... especially since they debuted a new boy group? like i would hope that they would have had this all sorted and figured out prior to starting a new project like that bc now it affects not only just ateez but also the new group and everyone who manages and works with that new group too. and frankly from the way ateez discuss their trajectory and their fame, i don't see them finding a happy place to be content at in terms of fame. each time they achieve something, they adjust their goals and keep pushing for something bigger and higher than before, which is likely a product of them coming from a company outside the big4 and also just their work ethic in general but i don't see them slowing down any time soon which is another layer of concern for how the company is working them right now

[myjunkisyuzuruhanyu]

Same anon as before and thank you so much for your fast and super detailed reply! It explains a lot, especially the bit about scoring. I had no idea shoma’s technique was so controversial ( I just think he’s beautiful on ice and I love the way he moves, and that’s enough for me ^^;)

Can’t believe ppl think his family buy his scores though, is his family *that* wealthy? ( I mean they’re obviously well off, but).

I’m also well aware of the controversy around his words and I personally think it’s a steaming pile of bullshit. I hate current internet culture where you just need to say something stupid ( if it was him at all) once and you’re cancelled forever. smh. I can’t believe people still bring that up. Especially given that it happened in a very dark period of his life, I can only imagine how Shoma was feeling in that period :/ anyways, I’m really happy to see him in a much better place now 🥰

I’m so grateful for his YouTube channel too, it really gave me so much insight into his personality and I find him super endearing. I want to sit his haters in front of those videos and make them watch all of them u.u

Anyways, I guess I will just stay away from the toxic fan communities from now on ^^; do you have any recommendations for places (beyond tumblr) that are good for Shoma fans?

Thank you again <3

No need to thank, glad I could help. I'd rather answer such things quickly if I see them as I don't like to have them in my inbox. Better tick off the uncomfortable questions...

___

Yes Shoma's technique is controversial, but Shoma is far from the only skater with technique issues on the contrary many skaters have technical issues. Shoma only gets more hate because he wins and because skaters with the "right" technique don't "benefit in scoring" from their technique being better.

___

Anyone in this sport is from rather wealthy families. I don't know any skater who isn't "well off" however I do think that Shoma's family can be called rich. (there are fans who look for the prices of the stuff they have at home as what you can see on the puppy YT channel and they own loads of exclusive and expensive stuff)

Shoma buying his scores is big fat bs. There is no proof or any words of any official that ever pointed to this direction. It was just made up and spread by haters. Ppl who believe such bs are ppl who don't know how scoring works and can't properly evaluate Shoma's skills in this sport. I don't say that money can't have influence in scoring but any money cannot help Shoma land quads and develop the skill that he has. He was praised for his skating skills back in juniors when he wasn't even able to land 3A or quads and experts found it rather sad that such a talented guy would probably never win titles without the high scoring elements but as we know things turned out differently. In scoring consistency and reputation is key. Shoma may not always be clean but he can still deliver better than most other competitors and his results are pretty consistent. Shoma managed to stay one of the top skaters throughout his complete senior career, that's something that doesn't happen this often.

___

The only advice I have is to curate your own social media spaces. Hate can be anywhere. Block ppl on platforms who hate on Shoma, there is no use to argue with them. Then any social media platform can be a nice space.

I only use Tumblr and Twitter, but I know that Reddit for example is also quite nice for Shoma fans. Goldenskate forum has a Shoma fan fest section and there will only be talk about Shoma and hate isn't tolerated and will be deleted. (I know there can be drama in other general threads on other skating topics but as I don't use it I can't tell for sure)

Tumblr is mostly a safe space for Shoma fans, but as Twitter could crash at any day I see many Twitter users get back here and I can only hope they're not bringing the toxicity with them. But tbf I think it's easier to avoid hate on Tumblr as you need to tag words to make them show up in the search. You can also just stay with those you follow and you won't see any hate at all. (and thank goodness the confession block is gone) (and also because you can't see the number of followers you won't know who is "popular" around here and how blogs are connected and you can like whatever you want and it won't show up in recommendations)

There is one space for Shoma fans I can wholeheartedly recommend and use quite frequently but you should send me a PM that I can invite you to it as it's a little group of Shoma fans who created their own space.

[satorhime]

★ ⋆ ࣪ CALL 1-800-BOYFRIEND#2 ! an anthology | ˚｡jjk men x female reader ᨀ minors do not interact˓˓ aged up!characters, infidelity, toxic relationships, explicit smut, unprotected sex, creampies, degradation, squirting, praise kink, + more content warnings listed before each piece! ˚｡ FEATURING ᨀ fushiguro toji, gojo satoru, getou suguru, nanami kento, fushiguro megumi, itadori yuuji. ˚｡ SUMMARY ᨀ whenever you get in the mood, just call boyfriend number two! a collection of smut works inspired by the song boyfriend #2 - pleasure p; ꒰ PLAYLIST ꒱

★ ⋆ 𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮 ᨀ ࣪exes with benefits, ex boyfriend!gojo, belly bulges, cervix fucking.

you knew that it was wrong to invite him in while your boyfriend is waiting and let him fuck you, but how can you possibly atone for your sins when the closest thing to a god is the one helping you commit them between dirtied sheets?

“you gonna answer that, angel?” satoru taunts over the cheerful chime of your ringing cellphone. five missed calls from your boyfriend piled up in your notification center and he refuses to give up. your heart plummets down at the sound, sitting right next to the pretty bulge of your ex-boyfriend's cock in your lower belly as he fucks you mercilessly.

your tongue may be barbed with insults for him after your break up, but your pussy is still honeyed and sweet as ever to him. making the cutest noises, splitting like a good girl for the delicious stretch of his cock. he's got you embarrassingly fucked out too, ruining you before your date— lipstick smudged, thighs possessed by bruises from his teeth, all the while he's busy fucking his thick load back into your cunt from the first round.

“i recommend answering it, huh? tell him you're all taken care of, angel. don't want him comin' to your rescue when you're about to cum for me, now do we?”

“w-wait, i need to-” you choke, hand scrambling to find the phone somewhere in the soaked sheets— wanting to answer for your boyfriend even as your back curls off the bed when gojo fucks it just right, the fat mushroom tip of his cock bullying your cervix with each bruising thrust. “h-hold on a minute, f-fuck- slow down, my boyfr-”

he rolls his eyes, finding your phone easily and tossing it on top of the lewd bounce of your tits— a sneer on his lips as he fucks into your cunt with nasty, possessive ruts of his hips that sloshes slick and cum out of your abused little hole in a frothy drool that you can feel dripping down the line of your ass. he has no intention of slowing down or stopping so you squeeze your eyes shut, sucking your lower lip into your mouth to stifle your noises and finally, pick up the ringing hotline.

“hnnng h-hello?”

“hey, baby!” your boyfriend of one year greets cheerfully, oblivious and sweet. he upset no balances in the world with his birth and he isn't the strongest of anything— he's just a kind man, attentive and storybook romantic; the kind you dreamt of, but that doesn't stop you from letting satoru fuck you whenever he wants. “takes a while for my pretty girl to get ready, huh? know you're going to look amazing, too, but.. our dinner reservation was at 8. where are you?”

satoru snorts, shifting his hips to drag your attention back to him. your heart clenches at the same time your pussy does, cock catching you on a good fuck that shoots white hot pleasure simmering through your nerves. it's too much— you claw at his arms with one hand while the other shakes against the phone.

“i-i'm on my way soon, baby. sorry, oh my f- h-hah...” your lower lip wobbles as you fight the urge to cry out, dewy tears clinging to your lashes. gojo is relentless, bringing a violent tremble to your thighs as he lowers a hand between your legs, the calloused pads of his fingertips rubbing raw circles over your clit so good you drop the phone onto your chest.

“hello? babe, what's wrong?! are you there?” you can hear your current boyfriend's staticky voice on the other end while your ex leans forward, bracketing your head with his strong arms as he mouths wet kisses along the soft skin at your jaw; sucking the lobe of your ear onto his tongue.

“tell him this pussy is mine, you little slut. see how good 'm fucking you? where else are you gonna get it this good? don’t you want me back? wanna be able to fuck on this dick any time you want?” he growls, sickly sweet into your ear, the yandere tone of his voice rumbling shivers into your skin. “tell him who it belongs to or i will.”

“i-i can't- can't do that to him, 'toru-” you blubber, even though you want to. miss the way dating satoru made you feel complete. salty tears spill down your cheeks that gojo sweeps away with his tongue like a lazy cat lapping at his favorite bowl of milk.

his fingers quickly flick and twist overstimulation under the hood of your swollen clit until he feels your pussy squeezes around the stretch of his cock, cackling in response as he gets what he wants. he’s breaking you down, got you on the ropes. “see? this pussy knows what she wants, even if you don't,” he groans out too loud, hips stuttering and sloppy now, a rhythm that fucks you open while all you can do is sob and writhe like the wanton little whore you are.

“who the fuck is that- hello? hello? what's going on? are you okay?”

gojo is high off the power trip of your moans and though he knows that rubbing it in is breaking the ultimate code, his free hand's picking up the phone before he knows it—

“'toru- satoru, n-no-” you whine out, but he jerks his hips hard against yours to shut you up, lodging his cock so deep inside your pussy, your mind short circuits.

“yo!” gojo greets into the receiver, voice winded but clear. he's mockingly casual as he tucks the phone between his cheek and shoulder to free up his hands, as if he is discussing the latest gossip with a friend, his fingers digging prints into your hipbones.

“who the fuck is this?” you hear your boyfriend demand in confusion and you lurch forward to take the phone away, but the force of his cock lays you flat.

“i'm sure our girl's told you about me, yeah? the only one who broke her heart, the one who can't settle down, the one you're so much better than. blah blah blech- name's satoru!” he introduces himself and grins wide, glancing down at you. his pretty ex-girlfriend whines against his shoulder, thrashing against the sheets as he fucks that bubble in your lower belly to bursting. fucks you like no one else can. “anyways, cock's- oops, i meant cat's- got her tongue right now so i wanted to let you know that she won't be able to make it to your date tonight... ain't that right, baby?” he hums, holding the phone out to you so your boyfriend on the other line can hear the sweet, traitorous sounds of your moans as you cream on another man's cock. “yep, that's right. she finally decided to come home. where you should go too, man.”

gojo doesn't elaborate further, clicking the little red icon to end the call with a winner’s smirk on his lips and then his attention is back to you, on fucking a bellyache into you with his skilled fucking and your boyfriend's name out of you, the lewd sound of your slick gurgling out of your perfect little pussy sounding like sin. gojo's fingers are back on your clit, pinching it hard. “now back to you, angel face. cum for your boyfriend.”

★ ⋆ 𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢 𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨 ᨀ college!au, professor!nanami, student!reader, blowjobs, desk sex, semi-public sex in a classroom, use of "sensei" to address kento.

kento is the last of your professors you would have expected to keep you company while you cry over your boyfriend who would rather spend drunken nights out at frat parties, but you are quickly finding out that fucking your pretty little body is professor nanami's favorite after school activity.

“keeping yourself busy down there?” nanami has the nerve to inquire while you're on your knees under his desk, putting in real work for the title of his best student.

your expression is dazed and full of wonderment, a cute wrinkle between your brows at the way you are actually able to fit your professor's cock inside your mouth, nose pressed to the tamed patch of sandy hairs at his crotch. it's amazing how it can erase all bad thoughts of your neglectful lover from your mind and you worship it greedily. nanami's thick thighs spread wide, cafe au lait eyes gazing down at you over the top of his round reading glasses while you suckle on his cock like a lollipop. it's heavy against your tongue, weighing it down with the strain and drooling sweet opaque drops of precum down the slope of your throat. he barely makes a sound, but he rewards you with a jolt of his hips each time you swallow a drop of it with a whine.

“aaa-atta girl, just like that, huh? why don't you do that thing for me?” he drawls out in an appraising tone, lax in his chair.

you obediently draw back, eager to please him. you grip his wet cock gently in your small hold, kitten licks into the sensitive slit before you wedge your tongue under the head, sucking over a fat, forked vein. he is composed, the picture of professionalism during his working hours but you are the only one who is allowed the pleasure of seeing nanami kento with his hair mussed, glasses askew as you suck him wet between the legs. sleeves rolled up as one hand pins his pressed white shirt out of the way while the other rests on your head, petting your soft hair with affection.

“fuck, little darling- that mouth will be death of me,"” he breathes and you suck him down slow on the pull in, letting the tip of his cock nudge against the fleshy patch of your throat before tears spring into your eyes and you bounce back with a wet gag— bathing in the way that he hisses, in the way that you make him feel. he doesn't regurgitate bad lines from porn like your boyfriend does, but his grunts of pleasure and soft praise shoot like fallen stars across your pussy, making you sneak a hand into your sopping panties, immediately sinking two fingers past your entrance with a whine, the vibration like a hot rubber band around nanami's dick.

“wan’ you to fuck me now, p-please.”

“e-easy there. i'll take care of you. stop that and come here,” he coos, hooking an arm under your elbow as he drags your mouth away from his cock.

“o-oh-” your professor spins you around, bending you over his desk. he takes care in folding your skirt up, his big hands kneading the globes of your ass cheeks in a gentle circle. you wriggle your hips back desperately until you bump against his damp cock, squirming on the desk over his ungraded papers, takeout flyers, and seminar invitations.

“k-kento-sensei, hurry up, please-” you simper, eyes glazed over and glossy with lust for him already.

“i'm right here, doll,” he reminds you and he's in a good mood— he doesn't like impatience or insolence, but he lets you rut your ass against his crotch for friction until he stills your hips with a click of his tongue. “you don't have anywhere to be, after all. that fella of yours is at that party you were crying over, isn't he?”

your lips plump out in a pout, about to scold him for reminding you, but the words shrivel on your tongue as he edges forward to tug your panties down to the middle of your thighs, spreading one ass cheek to the side and exposing your pussy to the air. you're so pretty and wet for him, hole fluttering and glossy with slick.

“how badly do you want it?” kento chuckles under his breath, barely nudging his cockhead into the entrance to your cunt. your professor does not fuck like your boyfriend. he doesn't believe in ten minutes of sloppy, selfish fucking that leaves you unsatisfied. even with the risk of someone walking in, he is a man unhurried. he waits, petting two fingers between your folds. “hmm?”

“want it real bad, real real bad!”

“tch, have i taught you anything? use proper vocabulary when you beg for my cock.”

“once upon a midnight dreary, while i pondered, weak and weary, over how your cock would feel fucking me silly,” you smile cheekily into the strewn papers, arching your ass further against his hips in invitation.

“naughty girl, don’t ruin the classics,” the tiniest of smiles quirks his lips at your antics, snuffing out a laugh.

but nanami gives you what you’re begging for. he is discovering that refusing you is becoming increasingly difficult. his fingers curl around your waist, tugging your body down his desk until he impales your little pussy on his cock. the stretch is painstakingly slow, forcing you to feel every fucking inch, every ridge and vein— dragging along your walls in an overwhelming sensation. you scramble to grab purchase into the desk, mouth slacking open with a long grunt as you press your forehead to the desk.

“good girl. look how well you take me, hmm? if only you could listen so well in class, too,” he hums in approval, watching the way your pussy expands as he draws out, only to suck him in nice and tight as he plunges back into the warmth of your cunt. you've always been his worst student, combative and mouthy— barely able to sit through the nasally drawl of his lessons with your impatience, so it's no surprise when you drop your head onto his desk, gripping the edge as you bounce yourself back against his hips.

“did i tell you that you could-” but his reprimand is shut off with a sharp grunt, his hips stuttering while you tremble and frantically fuck your cunt on his cock at a quick pace, the pleasure coiling in your lower belly hard and fast. “oh, is that what you wanted? to cum?”

“yuh-yes! i-i need t' cum, kento-sensei!”

“cum then, call my name instead of his when you gush all over my cock. go on, love.”

★ ⋆ 𝐟𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐨 𝐭𝐨𝐣𝐢 ᨀ age gap (toji is in his 40s, reader is in 20s), babysitter!au, mean!toji, car sex, cowgirl, breeding kink.

toji wasn't a nice man, but he had well-behaved kids and secretly tipped you bonuses on days you wore short dresses or skirts to the house as if you wouldn't notice. it wasn't uncommon for him to give you a ride home whenever it gets too late, even if his dark eyes linger on your thighs the entire time. crawling into his lap like a money hungry little whore and unzipping his jeans in the front seat of his car after he offered you five hundred dollars to see if you could fit his cock inside you was new, though.

toji used a safety pin to tack the wad of fresh green dollars against your tank top with a crooked grin, as if you were a birthday girl. he moves the cash now to pull your tank top aside and expose one of your nipples, the little bud puckered up from the blast of the air conditioner behind you.

“m-mr. fushiguro, i have a boyfriend- mmph!” you whine in protest, a contradiction after you crawled across the center console with a competitive glint sparkling in your eye, the steering wheel of his jeep digging into your lower back.

you don't remember how the conversation started, but it ended with you in his lap and your bank account a half thousand richer. you should be disgusted, toji is sleazy— he'd rather spend time chasing after loose women than raising his children and he stares at your tits mid-conversation, but no. to you, he is the epitome of a dilf, all bulky and rugged lines and dark edges. and that's why you moan for his big, rough hands sliding under your simple tank top, cunt oozing slick for the father of two.

“that so? why're you grindin' all over my lap then, little girl? get off 'n' get outta my car if you're scared,” he growls, even though he knows you’re not running anywhere while he's got your skin feverish and sweaty as he tweaks one of your nipples, pinching the perky bud between two fingers. the sly smirk he wears on his scarred lip both irritates you and simmers arousal between your hips. you swear that your hips move on their own accord, bumping into the weighty girth of his cock that you forgot is sitting wedged beneath your ass. “yeah, you ain't going nowhere, are you? like it when nasty old men stare up your skirts and down your shirts, dontcha?”

his filthy words have your folds messy, leaving a damp patch on your cotton shorts. you move before you can stop yourself, reaching nimble fingers between the shadow of your bodies to unbutton his jeans, tugging his cock out with saliva drooling in your mouth. you wish that you could see it, but you can feel it, stomach lurching. the wide, blunt head twitching fat against your palm before toji is manhandling you, jerking your cotton shorts to the side and forcing you to grind your bare cunt along the length of his cock.

“let’s see where all my money is going to, eh?” he grunts at you, each of his huge hands are between your legs now, prying your folds open with his thumbs as you circle your clit against the surface of his cock. “so easy too- don't know if i want a little whore like you around my kids, hah. look at how wet you are for a man you ain't dating,” he rasps out in a salty, degrading tone, pinching one of your folds before he wraps fat fingers around his cock to hold it steady.

“y-you're so mean, mr. fushiguro,” you sigh out blissfully, not caring in the least bit when his cock rubs against your clit, creating delicious friction.

“yeah, and you're fuckin' slow. sit on my cock already or gimme my money back.”

your legs are split over the wide planes of his thighs, so snapping them shut isn't an option when he presses you back against the steering wheel, the horn beeping pathetically, pushing his thick cock into your sopping pussy.

your eyes widen at the overwhelming twinge of intrusion as toji feeds you every inch of his veiny girth— your hips having no choice but to drop into his lap and take his cock. watery tears prickle your eyes because it hurts so fucking good. he's the biggest you've ever had to fuck yourself on, bigger and wider than your boyfriend, twice as fat as he is long. but that doesn't stop you from levelling your weight down, letting your cunt sink and sink and sink, until finally he's so fucking deep that your clit is buried in his pubic hair and your ass is pressed up against his heavy balls.

“what's going on with this tight little pussy, mm? this guy not fuckin' you right, doll face?” he wolf whistles at the feeling of your cunt slobbering around him, desperately trying to accommodate his massive girth. “c'mon, move. don't sit there tremblin' on me like a fuckin' leaf.”

“f-fuck, too much it's big- so big, mr. fushiguro-”

“can't take it a cock this grown, doll?”

“i-i don’t know-” you whimper, but you don’t want to lose. hiding your face onto his shoulder, pleasure surges through your veins, dopamine fogging your brain as you lift out of his lap until the tip of his cock pops on your entrance. a devastating, heavy drop of your hips that spears you on his weighty dick, building up a rhythm that has you whining and creaming all over toji's cock. images of the man you've been dating flashes through your mind before your thoughts are clouded by the single father of two fucking you towards an orgasm. your pussy gushes, the bulb of your plump clit rubbing against the hard ridges of his abdomen.

“you want my cum? want me to plug you up all nice and full?” he grunts out the question, his breath fanning hot across your cheeks in the dark shadows of his car.

“yuh-yes! want your cum, want you to plug me up! want you to give me a baby,” you chant in a lusted moan, eyes rolling shut as he dips his head to your breasts where they've bounced out of the side of your tank top, suckling one of your nipples onto his tongue with a rough chuckle.

“woah now, who said anything about you havin' one of my rugrats? you like watching 'em that much?” he lifts a thick brow, but he would be lying if he said it didn't make his cock twitch inside of you. if it didn't make him rut his hips up into you with deep, low grunts in the depths of his chest. he bares his teeth, pinching your nipple between his sharp canines in a hard bite, throwing you off the edge—you drop your hips, cunt spreading around the base of his cock and creaming all over him as you cum, squirt dripping on his leather seats.

“fuck, oh fuck. you’re so tight, ain’t ya? you want my runts so bad, take every fuckin' drop of my cum, little slut, ‘n’ don’t complain about it,” his abdomen tightens at the feeling of your cunt spasming around him, his cock jerking as he heat washes over his body, shooting thick, wet ropes of seed into your cunt.

★ ⋆𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐮 ᨀ stranger!suguru, hookups, bathroom sex, cunnilingus, panty sniffing, tongue piercings.

he was dark and alluring, ensnaring your attention like a siren calling across the dance floor. you should have declined his offer to buy you a drink and he should have bid you goodnight when you told him you were taken, so how did you end up here?

“aren't you precious?” the stranger purrs breathily into the drum of your ear, breath the scent of cigs and mint as he advances on you, crowding you up against the cool sink. thankfully, the bathroom is clean and there is a lock on the door, hiding you away from your friends and their judgmental eyes. “you couldn't resist following me here, even though your friends are worried and there is someone waiting at home for you. i'll make your betrayal worthwhile, don't worry.”

your breaths wheeze out in a fog, his accusation burning hot but the handsome stranger is reaching under the hem of your mini dress to soothe the sting of his words, slipping your panties down your thighs. there's a cheshire smirk on his thin lips, rows of perfect teeth gleaming in delight to find you dripping for him already— the fabric clinging to your folds, connected by sticky strings of slick.

“these are a nice pair- i hope you'll forgive me, pretty,” he hums, inspecting the lace before gathering the damp panties in his hand and bundling them against his nose, an audible sniff snorting through the quiet that warms your cheeks in embarrassment. “you smell fucking divine, too. it's a shame that boyfriend of yours won't be able to take them off at the end of tonight.”

they're your favorite set, navy blue fenty lace that you wore to boost your confidence. that you planned to seduce your beau into ripping off of you when you stumble in from the club. instead, here you are, heart beating behind your ribs in the dark corner of a bathroom as a complete stranger tucks your panties into the pocket of his black jeans.

“d-don't talk about him like that- and give those back! i don't even know your name,” you hiss, irritation twisting your face at the nerve of this infuriatingly attractive no-name, but the raven-haired man looks unimpressed with your fervor as he circles his spindly hands around your hips and hoists you onto the sink, adjusting your thighs until one of your feet are propped up on the surface of the counter, spreading you wide for him.

“you'll know my name soon, don't worry,” he promises, the rolling drawl of his lilt making you shiver. the cold air breezes relief against your bare, feverish cunt as he presses close to you, settling in between the space of your open legs. he trails hot kisses over the pulse point at your neck, where your perfume is sweetest. your head lolls to the side with a lustful sigh, eyes butterflying closed as his teeth nip against the skin of your collarbone.

you gasp when you feel his fingers slip between your legs to shift through your drooling slit, your leg accidentally jolting off of the counter as he draws teasing figure eights into your clit. arms wrapping around his broad shoulders, your fingertips caress the long inky ponytail waving down his back, accidentally untying the leather strip holding it together.

“o-oh, your fingers-” you gargle, a soft moan spitting from your lips. he draws the digit down your slit, pushing the long appendage into your pussy, curling it up on the slow drag out, combing along your walls.

“call a new name tonight, precious. suguru. say it and i'll give you whatever you need.”

“s-suguru-” his name whines off your tongue so prettily as he fucks his finger into you languidly; your hips angle down, trying to suck it in deep and trapping his hand against the counter, but it's not enough— clamping down on it, but greedy for more. for a thicker stretch, for the cock you felt pressed up against you on the dance floor. you reach for the zipper of his jeans, but suguru angles his hips away with a tut. “i thought you said-”

“i promised i would give you what you need, pretty. not what you want,” he says, and then he's dropping to his knees. he's so tall that his head is level with your pussy up on the counter. he hooks his hands under the seat of your ass and scoots you to the edge of the counter, until you're on the edge of his own personal dinner table. his dark, crescent eyes trained directly on the juices webbing your folds together and the sight of your hole, unstretched and eager for him. “let me open you up first.”

his tongue swipes out, wetting his lips and you catch a glimpse of a silver jewel embedded in the pink flesh. glinting in the dim light of the bathroom— his tongue piercing and oh god, the sight of it has your cunt clenching around emptiness in want. he tilts his head forward, dark waves of hair falling like a smokescreen over his shoulders.

he spits on your pussy, a thick, bubbly glob of it trailing down your slit before he licks it up. long laps up your folds, the hard ball of his piercing making you squirm and gasp out, fingers sinking into his soft hair before you slip down to his ears, pressing your fingertips to the black gauges hooked in the lobes— causing him to suck in a sharp breath. suguru's lips are warm and wet, skilled as he secures a soft suck around your clit that draws your vision to a cross.

“oh my-”

“you like that, do you?” he smiles, eyes shaping to moons in glee— burying his head between your legs. he massages his piercing against your clit. hot stimulation and wet kisses over your cunt as the bass of club music thrums behind the bathroom door, stiffening his tongue for a harder lick. he swipes a few times against your clit until it swells, sweeping his tongue to your hole, curling his tongue inside to taste where you're leaking the most.

“i-i like it so much, sugu-” you moan and the shortened sound of his name on your tongue makes him snarl, roping his arms around your thighs and hooking you open for him. renewed in the way he slurps up the clear slick drooling out of your cunt before fucking it back in, the squish of his tongue flicking against your walls turning you limp— flaming your sensitive nerves with each heavy swipe. the sharp line of his perfect nose bumps your clit, sweet friction that has you drooping back against the sink mirror, widening your legs shamelessly.

“can't believe you're letting a stranger eat out a pussy this sweet- wonder if you'll let me fuck it too,” you feel like sobbing at the thought of being filled with his cock. your cunt squeezes his tongue desperately and he draws back, up to your clit where you're most sensitive at. putty in his grasp as he pulls the swollen nub onto his tongue, suctioning you in deep until you feel an orgasm tingling in your lower belly.

“i'm going to cum, suguru-” you whistle out breathlessly, clawing at his scalp. he grunts and pries your cunt apart with three wide fingers.

“what are you waiting for, pretty? cum for me.” it's not the cock you wanted, but his fingers are experienced— curling out and prodding in deep, switching and spreading until they push right against that sweet spot inside of you.

“o-oh-” gut lurching, your orgasm bubbles up fast as suguru fucks that spot until you cum, cunt pulsing rapidly. you sink, nerves raw and thighs shaking.

you're still tingling when he stands to his feet, his chin and nose covered in your slick. the handsome stranger rubs his fingers along your lips until you part them and suck them onto your tongue, eyes fluttering closed as you taste yourself on his skin. suguru unlinks his belt and your heart dips in lust at the sound of it.

“clean me up and i'll give you my cock up next, pretty girl.”

★ ⋆ 𝐟𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐨 𝐦𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐦𝐢 + 𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐢 𝐲𝐮𝐮𝐣𝐢 ᨀ best friend!au, no cheating, threesome, spitroasting, cum eating.

“you ever wondered what it would be like if we fucked each other?” yuuji joked, and though you and megumi swatted at him and berated his bad humor, you never expected a normal saturday night with your best friends to end up like this. with yuuji's tongue down your throat and megumi's lips on your breasts while the two of them fucked into each other's hands.

megumi knows that he should say something— he should say that what the three of you are doing is wrong. you're all best friends, empty red solo cups litter the floor of itadori's funky bedroom, but his mind is too full of cotton and cheap booze and he is entranced.

there is no way he can tear those jadestone green eyes away from the way you're begging for both of their cocks, from the way you writhe and whine on the bed as megumi and yuuji both play with your puffy clit, their fingers bumping against each other's clumsily while they fuck you.

you feel overwhelmed, overstimulated on both ends. the plump peach of your ass jiggles against fushiguro's tapered hips as he humps his cock into your pussy from behind, your breasts bouncing lewdly underneath your arched body as you suck yuuji's cock up front.

“'gumi, yuu- please! c-can't take it anymore!” you feel like crying, but the sound chokes off into a needy gasp as megumi's long cock drags through your walls at the right angle, his cockhead fucking against that gummy patch deep inside of you. you need them to cum— to give you a break. you never expected your sweet friends to fuck you like this.

megumi huffs, sweat beading down his neck as his fingers pet and rub quick against your swollen, sore clit. almost sobbing when your soft walls clamp down on him so tight that he fights to pull out.

“i'm gonna cum soon, but f-fuck- stop fucking clenching around me like that, stop-” megumi's raspy whine is guttural, yanking his cock out suddenly to stave off the burning orgasm at the base, watching the way your cunt pulses around emptiness, stretched and pretty, before he feeds it back in.

“fushiguro's cock feeling good down there, babe? hitting all the right spots?” your strawberry-haired friend groans out, neck blotchy with blush and shuddering as you flick your tongue over the seam of his balls. his heavy cock bumps against your cheek, smearing precum all over your foundation before you slack your jaw and suck him back into your mouth. you grasp his hipbones desperately to fuck his cock deeper down your throat. yuuji is painfully thick, stretching a dirty twinge in your jaw while megumi is long, spearing your puffy walls until your cunt aches with pleasure, nerves flipped inside out with each rolling thrust of their cocks.

neither of them expect you to answer the question the way that you do— reaching between your wet thighs, fingers bumping megumi's cock where it squelches in and out of your hole, you scoop sticky cream onto two fingers and show the drizzle proudly to the two boys drilling you. their groans reverberate on each end of you as they fuck you harder.

if you didn't feel overwhelmed with the white hot licks of sensation scorching a trail through your body, you would be embarrassed letting your two best friends see you like this— creaming and drooling all over them.

“i-itadori, don't do that-” megumi suddenly hisses, hips stuttering as his cock thickens out. his fingernails cut bruises into the soft flesh of your ass as he watches yuuji bring your hand to his lips, wrapping them around your fingers to shamelessly suck the combined mixture of you and megumi's cum from the digits.

“fuuuuck, f-fuck! why d'you two taste so-” yuuji cries in a mumble around your fingers, tongue lapping against your fingertips for more. it's not your pretty little mouth caving his stomach inward with the way you suck his cock, but the bittersweet taste of his two best friends' cum bursting over his tastebuds that sends yuuji over the edge first— ropes of warm cum shooting into your mouth without warning, kicking a pained grunt out of the male's chest. you choke, drawing back to suckle the tip greedily as he feeds you his cum. “fuck, babe-”

“itadori, move.”

yuuji is barely on the comedown before megumi's fisting a hand into your hair and tearing your mouth away from his friend's flagging cock, chasing the burning deep in his own gut as he suddenly flips you onto your back. he presses your legs to your torso, feet brushing his shoulders until you're folded in half beneath him and your creamy cunt is open wide for him, a pitiful wheeze squeaking out of your mouth—

“m-megumi-”

the male wraps his fingers around the base, fumbling with it because it's drenched and slippery in your juices as he lines his cock back up with your pussy, fucking in so quick that you cough and scrabble to grab for yuuji, as if he can save you from the force of megumi's fucking. but your other friend is no help, stretching out on the bed next to you and shifting through the wetness between your folds to rub your clit.

“b-boys, i'm so close! please please please! wan'... wan' you both to make me cum!” you beg, thighs trembling violently against your chest and expression twisted in full bliss as yuuji pats wetly at your squishy clit while megumi fucks you out so good that tears spill hotly, blurring your vision as you cum, gushing so wet that you soak the bed. clawing at their arms and screaming their names so loud it makes megumi clamp a hand over your mouth. the latter is only two thrusts behind you, painting your insides with thick globs of seed that oozes out of you embarrassingly when he pulls out.

“i-i'll get a towel,” megumi breathes, sitting back on his haunches. his cheeks turn a rosy shade as he surveys the wreckage of his two best friends in the afterglow. it’s disgusting to megumi how the two of you are able to rest on top of soaked sheets, yuuji’s cock flagged and megumi’s cum funneling out of your used cunt. but neither of you are letting him run, your and yuuji’s fingers wrapping around each of his wrists and pulling him on the other side of you.

“or you could come cuddle me instead?”

yuuji did not need any convincing, but both boys can’t find it in themselves to move an inch when your breasts are the softest pillows their heads have ever touched.

[stanurines1mp]

Poison Me

Pairing: Shigure Sohma x Fem!Reader (she/her)

type: angst + slightly mature themes

an: im back eheheh. anyways, here is a short oneshot i wrote for one of the worst people to ever exist in the fictional world. He's literally so hot but goddamn this man is a walking red flag. i hate him but like i love him??? i feel like it cud be better. like, this isnt my best writing but this is just a short idea i had last night. also please interact thank you :) enjoy :) any requests, let me know :)

warnings: mature themes (no actual sex(?) but def close(?)), angst, shigure being the manipulative and toxic mf that he is, praise kink(in a sexual but also sad way(?)), shigure is a pretty shit person but thats not off-character. that's all? let me know if I missed anything. if you're not comfortable with mature themes, please don't read it! thank you :)

~~~

"I love you," the words slipped out of his lips in a grunt.

Liar.

You're such a liar, Shigure.

You always lie.

I love you, I love you, I love you...

But you actually don't.

You don't even remember how you met Shigure Sohma but you did. And because of that, you are now stuck in an endless cycle of pain. All because you couldn't let him go.

It should have been so simple. You knew the agonizing truth. You knew, he knew, everyone knew...

Yet why is it that you just refused to let go of him?

What about him kept you so addicted?

Was it because of his good looks?

As handsome as he was, that wasn't the reason.

You knew the poison he fed you were the words of his lies. That was the poison that's ruining your life, even now.

His poison wasn't deadly but its harm caused you pain more than any real poison would. It kept you just at the edge of life, not really killing you just yet. And honestly, you'd rather die than have to taste his poison again.

But his poison was addicting just as it was intoxicating.

There was no way you could ever actually leave him.

"You're so pretty, Y/N."

"You're so sweet, Y/N."

"Always so good, Y/N."

Even if you knew they were lies, you still couldn't get enough of them. It's like the tiniest amount of attention he graced you with overpowers all the pain he's putting you through.

He always knew how to make you feel good. Whether with his words or actions, he just knew how to string you along like a puppet.

And you succumbed your limbs to him. Your soul gets devoured by his cruelty disguised as kindness.

Even now, the reason you're currently under him, clothes discarded somewhere in the room, body vulnerable under his touch, was because you couldn't escape his poison.

In fact, you longed for it. And he was always there.

For someone who was never there, he was always there.

The night started normally. You had to go to work in the morning, a usual daily routine for you. Nothing bad happened. Really, nothing bad at all.

Nothing unusual, nothing out of the ordinary. Except when you suddenly thought of him. But to be honest, even that wasn't unusual.

You missed him.

You missed his words.

You missed his comfort.

You missed his touch.

You missed him.

So after work, you went back home. Again, so normal, so mundane. You were finishing dinner when your phone suddenly started ringing. Your eyes brightened up at the same time your heart mellowed. All because of the name displayed on your screen.

Shigure Sohma.

Swiping right, you answered his call. You gulped, bracing yourself for another night of torment alongside his company.

"Hey, pretty angel," his cheery voice passed through the line.

"Hey, Gure," you answered normally.

"How was your day, sweets?" He asked, so caring and kind.

As if you actually fucking care, Shigure.

But wasn't that sweet of you to ask me, Shigure.

"It was fine. Normal," you replied, trying your best to show that you don't care.

"Come over, Y/N. I miss you so much," he sweet-talked. "I couldn't stop thinking about you," he added.

You missed me?

Did you really miss me, Shigure?

Or did you just miss my body?

"I miss you too, Gure," you couldn't help but smile as you uttered those words.

"So you'll come see me, angel?" His tone sounded so hopeful.

Like he actually did miss you.

Like he actually did want you.

And maybe he did.

Because as he made love to you, he managed to give you what you needed.

"Yeah," you breathed out. "You know I could never say no to you."

"Hmm, that is true," he hummed lowly. "Right! Guess I'll see you later. Look pretty, princess," he added the last sentence with a sultry tone, proving easily what he wanted from you that night.

And what he wanted, he took.

That's how you ended up under him for God knows how many times even after you swore not to end up there anymore. His name left your lips like an unholy prayer.

And it was the same for him. His dirty words clouded the room as he claimed your body as his again and again and again and again.

"Always so fucking good for me, Y/N."

Don't wanna disappoint you, Shigure.

"Fuck, just like that, Y/N."

I'm glad you like me.

"You're doing so well, pretty girl."

You really think I'm pretty?

"Always know how to make me cum, angel."

Only me?

"I fucking love you so much, my good fucking girl."

Liar.

You've always been a liar, Shigure.

But please don't stop.

Please lie to me, Shigure.

Lie to me.

"Was that good, Gure?" You hummed against his bare chest.

"Yeah," he stroked your hair, providing further comfort.

I'm glad you liked it.

Such an innocent action for such a cruel man. Yet you couldn't help but fall into his arms. Fall for his words.

You laid on his chest, your arms wrapped around his neck while he held you. Even if you knew that he lacked any care for you, you couldn't help but focus on the fact that he was holding you.

And the warmth he radiated, God, why couldn't he just love you?

Your face was buried in the crook of his neck, hiding from his eyes. You couldn't look at his face. If you did, you'd just kiss him.

"You don't love me, do you?" You spoke, pushing your face deeper into his neck.

Silence.

"You could never love me. You only love her," you whispered, loud enough for him to hear.

You could feel Shigure's body tense under your touch. Wasn't that proof enough that you were right?

But you didn't even need that. You've seen her around before.

You've seen the picture frames scattered around Shigure's house. Pictures of them together sometimes with others, sometimes just them two. And you've certainly seen the way he looks at her.

Love.

That's what it was.

What you needed from him, he gave it to her.

Akito was beautiful, that wasn't even a question. And her years with Shigure were longer and more fulfilling than your time with him.

And you knew the only reason he was with you was because he couldn't have her.

You didn't know why but you didn't care much, either. Because he wanted you. And just like a stupid doll, you gave yourself to him.

Your soul, your smile, your body, your heart...

In turn, all you received was his poison.

"Isn't that true, Shigure?" You gulped, finally lifting your head up to see him.

Once again, silence.

But you knew you made a mistake of seeing him.

Just like you expected, the only thing you found yourself wanting to do was kiss him. You adjusted your body on his, your face the same level as his.

His lips were inviting and his eyes were so fucking gorgeous, you couldn't resist even if you wanted to.

And you really wanted to.

But again, you didn't want to look away from such a pretty face.

"Yes, it's true," he answered with a straight face, eyes staring back at you.

"Praying for your love is useless," you mumbled, eyes flickering from his own orbs to his lips.

Leaning in, you gave him a sloppy kiss. One that would certainly lead you back to the start of the night. But you didn't care.

Because he kissed you back.

"Yeah," he breathed against your lips, hands beginning to roam your naked body.

"Push me away," you begged, your fingers finding comfort between his dark locks.

Even as you said those words, you were still kissing him. And he was still kissing you back.

"Please, Gure," you begged breathlessly, feeling engulfed in the way he was leaving kisses down your neck. "Fuck," you moaned out softly as his lips tuckered that one spot that he knew drove you crazy. "Push me away."

Stopping you from saying and doing anything else, Shigure pushed his body off his bed. Your body was flipped to be under him, completely vulnerable and naked for him.

Just for him.

Just how he liked it.

Just how you liked it.

His left hand was next to your body, providing him support to loom over you. His right hand was pinning both your wrists over your head and against the silk sheets of his bed.

His head dipped down to meet yours, soft lips enveloped in a passionate kiss that lacked true passion.

"Do you want to push me away?" He breathlessly whispered against your lips, his hips grinding against yours, causing friction between your bare skin against his.

"N-No," you sighed. "Never," you added.

"Good girl," he grinned against the kiss before lowering his head to your neck, leaving more and more kisses. "You're mine, aren't you, angel?"

Yes, Shigure.

Always just for you.

So please, Shigure.

Please keep on lying to me.

Please lie to me.

Feed me your poison until eventually, it takes over me, Shigure.

Let me die by the lies behind your sweet words.

Please tell me you love me.

Please tell me you want me.

Poison me.

[msommers]

I would love more Maeve + Superstore thoughts, her friendship with Jonah sounds amazing

(i forgot about this in my drafts for too many days bc i’m a huge dummy don’t look at me here we go slamming post lmfao) oh boy, the tags were a 30 second long goof experiment but i'm always prepared to extend that for any scenario. let's make up some absolute nonsense for the lulz and cuteness.

literally do not ask me why posh brit accent maeve is working at a store in missouri because i don't have time for it and that's not part of the "everything here is for fun" theme.

one of her running gags is that she’s always talking about concepts for stories and tropes that she wants to explore/deconstruct, but anytime she’s asked about progress she’ll have some wild explanation for why she didn’t get very far into writing. there have been at least two rr martin comments made about how long it’s taken her to finish her first book. jonah, amy, sandra and cheyenne have all read some of her short stories/misc chapters of the first book because they’re here favorites full stop. final two seasons are for sure the “oh [bleep], maeve published her book and it’s really taking off” arc for her.

cheyenne is the little sister that she never had, they have matching nails and accessories all the time. maeve often does her hair for her because it’s fun to them and gives them chat time.

she did sandra’s hair and make-up for her wedding 🥰

was genuinely intimidated and putoff by dina for a good while but i cannot be talked out of believing that they wouldn’t have a c-plot in a later season episode of maeve making dina look as hot as can be and trying to teach her how to flirt without being so blunt. is she successful with that last bit?? not really, but she gets to dress dina up and also receive some good advice on not taking people’s shit along the way so that’s fantastic (garrett’s dying in the background and that’s all part of the plan tbh)

obligatory b-plot of maeve having to explain bisexuality and polamory to the breakroom clowns because most of them can’t understand her love life. probably came about as a result of another running gag where maeve talks about one of her dates and it doesn’t add up with her former comments much to the confusion of her coworkers, and then she has to whip out the lecture because she gets accused of straight up lying or fooling around on her partner.

once accidentally made people think she and amy were going on a date because she told justine they were "going out for dinner tonight" and it started an entire Discussion behind their backs (she does, in fact, put out the offer to amy before leaving work. gotta shoot that shot, maybe amy’s feeling a little curious that night who knows a girl can dream)

she and jonah instantly connected and became great friends. they share a specific optimistic outlook in the way that they can see the world for what it could be instead of what it currently is and it’s something that brought them together, then kept them close even through the rough times. she loves his commitment and dedication to any cause that he undertakes, his efforts are inspiring and keep her going whenever her own start to waver. she is absolutely obsessed with how he consistently finds a way to put his foot in his mouth during any conversation, the yin to her yang as maeve’s known for being able to spin a web as quickly and for as long as necessary. their shared need to be validated and praised goes a long way between them because they’re annoyingly nice to each other all the time. they’re those two at the breakroom table talking animatedly about their latest interest or topic they picked up from a podcast/news article/reddit post (toxic masculinity, current politics, feminism, some obscure piece of history or a cryptid of the week, etc). he’s endlessly patient with her and she’s beyond thankful for it. flipside is that she unironically loves listening to him go off on his Woke Rants and gets bullied about it but doesn’t care, she’s there for him through the relationship struggles and does her best to give advice while not stepping over the line (might toe it once or twice but. what can you do, she’s a drama lover). she might have been late because beauty routines but she was also there each step of the way for the union work, besties get it done. maeve sweet talks them and then jonah goes on a righteous rant it’s a win/win.

i think it’s entirely possible she and jonah dated because of how well they get along, but i don’t see it lasting a crazy long time. maybe two, three months at the most (perhaps it’s mostly bc i’m an amy/jonah hoe and they belong together forever but whatever, don’t perceive me). a scenario where they’d both decide it’s better they stay friends and they get away with it without much weirdness, aka maeve’s fine and jonah or the coworkers makes it awkward sometimes before it settles. i do in fact think he’d be the first love interest of maeve’s that i can see her using “baby” as the primary petname because like,,,it’s jonah. you get it. if they dated, she has a photo taken of them from one of their dates taped up in her breakroom locker and it stays up there until she leaves the job bc she adores it so much.

insert bit where maeve makes a threesome joke with her + jonah and amy, and there’s a pause Just long enough with everyone looking between each other that it appears genuine consideration is there but the camera cuts before anything else is said. the world may never know what happened after that

everyone keeps trying to make drama between her and amy because they’re both close to jonah, but i fully believe maeve would adore and respect her far too much to reach any level of rivalry. she’d be in awe of how strong of a woman amy is between raising her children and working her ass off so successfully, and i imagine a lot of their bonding would be maeve persuading her into taking time for herself or them having girls’ nights (whether by themselves or with some of the others).

put the tabby obligated “they have two hands” joke here about maeve/amy/jonah. i haven’t put any thought into if it’d work out or if the other two could be into that sort of relationship but i’m legally and morally obligated to bring it up on the principle that it’s My Thing.

[pipipinyyy]

Explaining why I have added every song in my entire and very long Niragi playlist because I can and because over analyzing him is my passion (I usually update it from time to time but I'll do it with the current songs)

Completely self indulgent post, but I decided to share to feed my fellow Niragi stans (*˙︶˙*)☆*°

This is entirely based on my view of the songs and how I interpret them while thinking about Niragi. I'm aware that most of them have entirely different meanings, this is just for fun :) (Also sorry if my explanations don't make much sense, English is not my first language and I might make mistakes when trying to put my feelings and thoughts into words)

This may contain manga/s2 spoilers

Hayloft-Mother Mother: Vibes

Criminal-Britney Spears: The whole song describes him ("he is a sucker with a gun") and the fandom's obsession ("mama I'm in love with a criminal")

Daddy Issues-The Neighborhood: I feel like he would act like this, using the most vulnerable spots to pick on someone ("cry little girl, nobody does it like you do")

Psycho-Jin Dogg, OVER KILL: Vibes

Riot-Hollywood Undead: He'd definitely start a riot like he did in the 10 of hearts, burning and destroying anything that crosses his path

Bitches-Mindless Self Indulgence: He most likely thinks he's a total fuckboy and popular with girls since he can get almost anything he wants out of scarying people

Baby's on Fire-Die Antwoord: Vibes

Insane in the Brain-Cypress Hill: This man is being consumed by his own way of protecting himself

Wolf in Sheep's Clothing-Set It Off: Based on how he feels towards the people who hurt him in the past ("Listen, mark my words, one day, you will pay" "You've always been a huge piece of shit, if I could kill you, I would" "Karma is gonna come collect your debt")

Death no more-IC3PEAK: Vibes

Gasoline-I Prevail: Sort of similar to Riot, ("So burn it all down, burn it all down, I don't give a fuck")

Toxic-Britney Spears: The whole fandom knows how much of a piece of shit this dude can be, but we still find ourselves liking/enjoying his character (to an extent), a toxic addiction

Nice Guy-GRLwood: As much as I love this man, he'd use the "I'm a nice guy c'mon" card just to fuck. If he wants to, he'll get it, if he doesn't, he'll most likely get mad

Dernière danse-Indila: Vibes

TRRST-IC3PEAK: Mostly vibes, I kinda see this song as how he felt the first time he killed someone on purpose inside the borderlands ("mama they say I'm a terrorist, I did nothing wrong but I got on the blacklist")

Saint Bernard-Lincoln: Vibes

Nowhere To Run-Stegosaurus Rex: Being with him at the Beach would either be ignoring each other completely or a game of tag, no inbetween. If this man wants to kill you, he'll get his fun time out of it as well ("You're gonna die, I'm gonna kill you")

The House of Wolves-Bring Me The Horizon: Based on how he sees life after being consumed by his current mental state ("Show me a sign, show me a reason to give a solitary fuck about your god damn beliefs" "What you call faith, I call a sorry excuse")

Smells Blood-Kensuke Ushio: Vibes

SIU-Maretu: Similar to Daddy Issues, don't expect this man to be a therapist. If he sees anyone crying or panicking in or outside a game, he'd most likely tell them to suck it up, just like this song.

Judgement-Kensuke Ushio: Vibes

MONSTER ENERGY GUN!-KevinKempt: Vibes + He for sure has an energy drink addiction, specially pre-borderlands

HURT-1 800 PAIN: Vibes

Fear Is The Mind Killer-Zheani: Vibes

I Bet on Losing Dogs: Based on how I know Niragi is toxic, and most likely unsaveable of his deteriorating mental state, but I still have him as my biggest comfort character ("I bet on losing dogs, I know they're losing and I'll pay for my place")

Emo Boy-Ayesha Erotica: He's been in an emo phase (and maybe still is), the lyrics are pretty self explanatory, they describe us Niragi simps perfecrly ("come on fuck me emo boy")

Crybaby-Destroy Boys: Vibes

The Fox's Wedding-MASA Works DESIGEN: Vibes

You're a useless child-Kikuo: We don't know much about his past, but judging by the unstoppable bullying he's suffered, his parents didn't care about him, or were straight up absent. He's been insulted by pretty much everyone in his past to the point of believing it and telling those things to himself ("You're a useless child, the most useless child in this world" "Drool in snot, dandruff, shit and piss" "I'm a useless child" "Nobody will save me" "I'm a lonely kid")

Take A Slice-Glass Animals: Vibes

Fighting With The Melody-Jimmy Urine: Vibes

Comics-Caravan Palace: Vibes

Rhinestone Eyes-Gorillaz: Vibes

Butch 4 Butch-Rio Romero: Mostly vibes, sort of how I think the most "peacefull" moments in a relationship with him would feel like, kind of bittersweet feeling

Suki Suki Daisuki-Jun Togawa: Yandere Niragi. If he's interested in someone, he'd go through an obsessive phase, most likely forcing the other person to "love" him. This man is so confused about the feeling of love that he's unable to tell when he loves someone or when he's obsessed with them due to his lack of attention ("Like you, like you, I love you. Say you love me or I'll kill you")

:(-The Garden: Vibes

Kitty City-Cyriak Harris: Vibes

Blood-My Chemical Romance: If Niragi went to a therapist, he'd act like this song, with his signature cocky and sarcastic personality (at least before he gets better) ("I can't control myself because I don't know how" "They can fix me proper with a bit of luck" "I'm the kind of human wreckage that you love")

A Mask of My Own Face-Lemon Demon: He feels like he needs to protect himself or else he will get hurt inside the borderlands by others again. He uses another personality, a completely ruthless one, even if he doesn't like it and hates himself for it, he doesn't see another way to deal with his fear, allowing his "new self" to consume himself. ("I'd wear that mask of my own face" "I look into my eyeholes and what do I see? A handsome motherfucker motherfucking looking back at me")

I'm a Murderer-Freddie Dredd: Mostly vibes ("I'm a motherfucking murderer")

'Cause I'm a Liar-Mcki Robyns-P: He would lie just for fun even in serious situations. If he needs to manipulate someone to survive, he'll do it his way, after all, he doesn't care anymore, he just seeks for excitement. ("Without emotion, without devotion. It's much easier to fake something happy")

I Disagree-Poppy: I don't know exactly how to describe it, but I feel like this is how he sees and feels the world and those around him, feeling misunderstood and going his own way ("If only all of you could see the world I see, then maybe everyone could live in harmony")

Personal Jesus-Mindless Self Indulgence: He has a superiority complex, that's for sure. I don't think he sees himself as a god, but I see him joking about it

Rainbow Factory-GLAZE, WoodenToaster: Vibes

Frontier Psychiatrist-The Avalanches: I kinda see this as Aguni taking the role of Niragi's "father figure" inside the borderlands, realizing he's turning insane and is unable to control him ("That boy needs therapy")

Hate it. Hate it. "JIGAHIDAI!"-WADATAKEAKI Kurage P: Jealousy. I can see it either in a pre-borderland situation where he hates the popular students in school, or inside the borderlands hating both Chishiya and Arisu. Jealousy takes over him constructing a big ego, causing himself to develop his superiority complex ("You see, I hate that popular girl!" "Does she think I don't notice? How she looks at me as if I'm trash" "I want to be praised" "I'm different from you all, I have my own ego! I'm not a side character" "I have zero common sense. I'm special")

Villain-Stella Jang: He knows damn well he's a villain, that's his goal after all, but what if someone took his point of view? wouldn't the villains be all of those who hurted him in the first place? ("We all pretend to be the heroes on the good side, but what if we are the villains on the other")

Violent-carolesdaughter: This is how I view an argument inside a relationship with Niragi. He's used to violence, to cause fear, and getting what he wants, so being in a healthy relationship would require a lot of patience and strenght. While he's getting better and suppressing those violent actions, there will be times where he accidentally uses violence or threatens the other person unintentionally, mostly hurting himself and his partner psychologically. The lyrics change between both points of view ("Don't make me get violent, I want my ring back baby that's a diamond" "She knows I'm a wreck" "I gave you all my trust and I told you just don't break it")

Hey Bunny-Baby Bugs: Based on how I think it would feel to partner up with him inside the borderlands and catching feelings for him while knowing the huge mess he is ("Hey bunny, what's with those evil eyes?" "Hey bunny, what the hell is wrong with us?" "Hey bunny, what if I loose you too? If I become the monster, together we can always be blue")

Kokoronashi-majiko: I'm pretty sure Niragi isn't able to see himself as someone able to love, even if he doesn't want to be alone (just like when he confesses this feeling while fighting with Chishiya and Arisu). If someone truly loved him and was willing to not letting him go, it would hurt. He can't see himself as someone who can love or be loved, so he can't accept the love he's seeking for in case that turns him "weaker" making his true self confront with the protective mean personality he's created. He could learn how to accept it, so he might want the other person to stay in the end, but it wouldn't be easy for him to accept it ("It's awful, I'd rather you destroy my body, tear it to sheds, do as you please" "No matter how much I'm loved by you, my heart is just one" "I don't know this, don't leave me alone")

Nightmare Parade-FAKE TYPE.: Vibes

Slipping Through My Fingers-Meryl Streep, Amanda Seyfried: Niragi seeing himself loosing his young, gentle and caring personality due to his fear, being unable to control what's happening inside, nostalgia and sadness kicking in ("The feeling that I'm loosing her forever" "That funny little girl" "Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture and save it from the funny tricks of time")

Kuroneko No Tango-Pink Martini, The Von Trapps: Vibes

YKWIM?-Yot Club: Him confroting his feelings of loneliness when he's left alone with his thoughts ("It feels like I care too much when I'm alone, oh no")

Romantic Lover-Eyedress: Just appreciating his physical appearance ("She's a killer, I love her features")

Wrecking Ball-Mother Mother: Based on how he sees himself as someone who needs to destroy everything in a way or another in order to be powerful + the fun he has with it ("Call me a reckless wrecking ball" "Let's break it just because we can")

Edge-Rezz: Vibes

Freaks-Surf Curse: Again, confronting feelings when loving someone, but not in such a painful as Kokoronashi ("I need a place to stay where I can cover up my face" "Don't cry, I'm just a freak")

Little Bit-Lykke Li: Vibes

6up 5oh Cop-Out (Pro/Con)-Will Wood and the Tapeworms: Vibes

PHONKY TOWN-PlayaPhonk: Vibes

I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE-Måneskin: Freaky time. He would absolutely love this song, definitely his type of thing ("You could be the beauty and I could be the monster" "I wanna touch your body so fucking electric" "I wanna make you hungry, then I wanna feed you")

#BrooklynBloodPop!-SyKo: Vibes

A Cold Freezin' Night-The Books: Vibes

A Pearl-Mitski: My most favorite song to associate with Niragi. Represents his evolution as a character. Creating an scenario where he is loved by someone,he rejects it at first, acting tough ("I don't want your touch") and then proceeds to explain why ("It's just that I fell in love with a war, nobody told me it ended" "it left a pearl in my hand and I roll it around every night just to watch it glow") the war being the borderlands and his new personality, he loved it, but nobody drew a line and it's getting out of hand. The pearl is the feeling of power, the one he has to remember when feeling weak just to feel something. At the end of the song it changes to ("Sorry I can't take your touch"), realizing that he wants love, but he's not able to take it or else he'll become the Niragi from the past

Problematic-Bo Burnham: Him acknowledging his problematic actions but not wanting to apologize because he doesn't feel the need to. He knows he's done bad things but he is going to laugh at it and be a sarcastic mf about it

First Love/Late Spring-Mitski: Similar to Kokoronashi, he wouldn't be able to accept love and how it makes him feel. He would think that he prefers for everyone to hate him and be lonely instead of sacrificing his tougher side. Also talks about how he's grown way too quickly for him to understand feelings properly ("So please hurry leave me, I can't breathe, please don't say you love me" "One word from you and I would jump out of this ledge I'm on baby" "I was so young when I behaved 25, yet now I find I've grown into a tough child"

The Other Side Of Paradise-Glass Animals: Vibes

Bodybag-Chloe Moriondo: How I feel about liking his character, confronting feelings basically ("Don't know if I hate you or if I wanna date you" "I don't wanna like you, I just wanna tie you up, then keep you in a cage and watch you sleep for ages"

Get Into It (Yuh)-Doja Cat: Vibes

Psycho Killer-2005 Remaster- Talking Heads: Vibes

HOT DEMON B!TCHES NEAR U!!!-CORPSE, Night Lovell: Vibes

INFERNO-Sub Urban, Bella Poarch: Again, another song that describes him pretty well ("Baby I'm the reason why hell's so hot" "Terribly like terrible, she's a villain" "Think I'm getting butterflies but it's really something telling me to run away")

Bad Morning-Omori: Vibes

Trouble Brewing: Vibes

Dueles Tan Bien-Bruses: Another song about my confronting feelings with this man ("You know what? You taste better than alcohol to me. You know that and you've got control" "Because you hurt, and you hurt so good that I don't know what to do")

And that's it!! This took me the whole day to write but it makes me very happy to be able to share it :)

I've you've read the entire thing, hope you enjoyed the character analysis! ლ(◞‿◟ლ)

[lovelettersforthevoid]

16, 22, 34, 36, 46, 56, 64, 66, 70, 76, 78, 86, 88, 92, 94, 96, 100

16. Do theoretical ethical debates have any value? Is it important people discuss ethical dilemmas, e.g. the trolley problem? I just think it's fun to think about stuff like that, so it is of value for me. I also think it can be pretty insightful when you take the position of the devil's advocate.

22. How long does it take you to fall in love with somebody? Is the sensation of ‘falling in love’ or ‘being in love’ better? Since I think that I've found my true love I can say that the being in love part was reached quite quickly. And oh my, truly being in love is something else. The first week of us being together already felt like we've known each other for ages.

34. Was your childhood happy? Yes, I cherish a lot of moments and feelings.

36. Have you ever met someone who had a very similar personality to your own? Did you get along? We've been together for almost four years and we love each other deeply.

46. Is true world peace ever possible? Man I wish, but I don't think so. Humans will always find ways to form groups and discriminate against each other. We will always find new differences that will separate us. It's just in our nature.

56. What do you think about artificial intelligence? I love working with it and thinking about the ethics behind it. Like what does it even mean to understand something. We're all like 'well it's just programmed to show emotions or learn a language', well yeah but how is that any different to the way humans learn about the world?

64. How consistent is your perception of time? Pretty inconsistent as of late. I sometimes forget parts of what I've done during the day. Sometimes being in the present feels like it happens ages ago. Did I even go for a run today? What did I eat yesterday? I am quite scared of losing my mind pretty early.

66. How do you feel about the idea ‘an eye for an eye’? I understand the historical significance of it. As it being one of the first forms of regulated justice. But now it's a very antiquated way of thinking.

70. What’s the tragedy of your life? I would describe myself as a quite artsy and visual person. And I have a condition that will eventually make me go blind.

76. Do you crave approval and/or praise? Oh yes. I think everything I do is wrong or stupid or I'm not doing enough in general, so I need constant reassurance.

78. Are you ever going to be satisfied? I think I'm on a good way.

86. What’s your toxic trait? Are you trying to improve yourself and fix it? Needing time to process things that bug me or depress me. I often need a while to come forward with an explanation as to why I’m quiet or in a bad mood. I’m aware of that

88. Are you a jealous person? If ContraPoints has taught me one thing it's the difference between jealousy and envy. And I would consider myself more of an envious person, especially regarding skills, abilities, looks, etc.

92. Do you speak multiple languages? Which do you dream in? What language would you want to learn? Fluent in German and English. I think and dream in both. But I'm currently learning Dutch. And if there was more time I'd also love to learn more Japanese and Korean.

94. How would you describe yourself when you love? Do you love forcefully, unconditionally, gently, quietly, desperately? Passionately, with every fiber of my being.

96. Is your perception of yourself similar or the same to how others perceive you? I recently found out that it differs quite a lot. I think I'm barely doing enough for uni and everyone else thinks I'm a huge nerd who does way too much.

100. What belief do you have that isn’t logically grounded, but you still firmly believe in? That love is the most important experience of the human condition and that soulmates exist.

Those were a lot, took me a while, thanks for the questions ✌️

[holywankenobi]

SW fandom rant

To be honest, I don't really know how or where can I start talking about this. If you aren't interested in any of the Star Wars drama that is going on then skip this post, cause its gonna be long... these goes for the SW fans we are concerned about the whole situation itself. I barely have the strength to do this and exposing my opinion about certain things makes me uncomfortable but it's been a long while since I'm keeping things to myself. There's much information I have to process so please be patient with me since I barely know how to express my emotions in the right way (that's why I'm holding myself back a lot here: it will seem I'm calm... but I'm not. I'm angry and tired at the same time).

DISNEY CANON

We all know where it all started. The Force Awakens premiere in 2015. We will start from there.

As ANY star wars movie, there will be people who liked it, people who loved it and people who hated it. And there is where some fans clash with the others. Fans who enjoy practically every movie or SW related things and those fans who demonize every movie (specially the ones from the new Disney canon) and the only thing that matters for them are the episodes IV, V, VI and the Legends canon (some of them also defend the prequel episodes I, II and III, fact which I'll talk about it later). And they bash against everyone who likes the Disney sequels.

BOI IM SCARED OF TELLING PEOPLE THIS WAS MY FAVOURITE SAGA SO FAR. And I already had problems with Legends hardcore fans.

Let me tell this straightaway... Star Wars are movies for kids. They've always been. George Lucas said it. They seem to be thirsty for feeling again what they felt when they were kids whenever a SW movie comes out but they always exit the cinema with a feeling of extreme disappointment.

I was talking about the last movie with my co workers at the beginning of the year and they complaint it was "too Disney". And that's precisely what I'm trying to explain! It's ok whether you like the sequels or not like them. Everyone has his own taste. I just find funny complaining for a whole saga originally made for kids for being "too Disney". I dont know if you get my point here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEsOqEpNF0k&list=PL8SlwcJuVWR2FNtL-6Wo5QUP6LMjpNJUA

LEGENDS CANON

Then there's those who hated the prequels, that said there was nothing worse than the phantom menace, those who hated on George Lucas for doing such a crap, but now praise the prequels because Disney is satan for them and they want the old canon back. George Lucas ended up selling SW to Disney because, he ain't no fool, he knows this fanbase is one of the most toxic and ungrateful that has ever existed. And he saw it with the prequels feedback... Then they now have the guts to demand him to continue the old canon? Smells like hypocrite-crying fanboys to me.

My whole point is....It's ok if you are a new/Disney sequels fan, it's ok if you are a prequels fan, it's ok if you are a SW original movies fan, Legends canon fan, OG fan, casual fan, hardcore fan... as always you understand that not everyone will agree with your point of view, not everyone will like or think the same way as you do, or live SW the same way as you do. There's a difference between respecting and agreeing with, concepts which sometimes get mixed and taken as the same thing, which is not. Respect other fans mean "I don't agree with you but I know how much this means for you, so I won't intentionally mock you" WHICH THING LEADS US TO THE NEXT TOPIC:

JOHN BOYEGA

*takes a deep breath*

Man. I dont know. He's a full grown up man and he's behaving like a 5 yo on his social media...... John is the actor who gives life to Finn (the ex stormtrooper). It all started with this sexist comment he responded to a fan in his IG. 

Then people (naturally) got offended, specially reylos. But instead of apologizing he kept on going, remarked what he said and also did a video to mock the reylo community.

You think I'm only defending a ship here but no. Its bigger than that. He has the right to feel left out in this saga because I agree with him IN THAT FACT. He is probably the actor which is more into the SW world, he was always a big fan (of the whole cast I mean). Thats why fans love him do much. And I did love him too. And he (naturally) wanted to have more spotlight on this saga ( I think Finn was one of the most wasted characters of these movies tbh) But instead of taking it the mature way he's having a tantrum on his IG because Finnrey did not become a real thing, he's trolling reylos and encouraging SW haters and antis to bully them whose are already having a hard time with TROS end (which I'll talk about later because I dont like their attitude about it either).

And it's not just raise the hate on shippers thing dude you could just apologize because you said something sexist and offended a lot of people who ship reylo and really means a thing for them. The whole thing that the greatest achievement a man can have with a woman is sex is just DISGUSTING. Rey kissed Ben but now he's gone Finn has the road clear and can fuck her? BRUH.

This is all so wrong and he was the one who started it.

ADAM DRIVER

I'm really relieved Adam does not have any social media because omg I would be suffering so much rn...

I honestly have never emotionally connected with an actor so much as I did with him. His whole acting is so good and I could really notice on this last movie. I'm starting to watch his other movies. And not just his acting, he's so professional off camera too.

I'm really happy and proud of him for his Oscar nomination, he really deserves it TT

But I'm worried this whole John Boyega thing affects him. Idk how I would feel if I were in his shoes, if my coworker was saying those things on social media and then smile at me like nothing is happening. But honestly what hurts me the most is he's having a worse time with "reylos".. I think the rumors of him having an affair with Daisy Ridley was what messed things up. I honestly dont know if its true, I've got some info but it's hard to believe. Because there are so many haters manipulating fake info that I dont trust anything and anyone anymore.

And this is where I talk about:

REYLOS AND DAIVERS

BOI OH BOI

This is gonna be hard....

First of all, I don't consider Daivers (Daisy x Adam shippers) as part of the reylo community. I'm sorry. But its fucking disgusting you going to demand Adam to divorce from his wife, abandon his son and then start dating Daisy because of this rumor or because you can't separate fiction from reality.... I read he even recieved death threats ARE WE NUTS??? They (Adam and Daisy) having a good chemistry working together doesn't mean they are in love, kids...

Driver has an awesome wife and a lovely son. Daisy is currently dating someone.

Infidelity is gross. No more. And I would be so disappointed at them if this turns out to be true. But seeing all what's happening around the actors and specially having all this haters out there... I'll say this was all false information.

Daiver is not real and won't be. So stick only to the fictional ship.....

About Reylo itself. I find REALLY funny how people who dont know shit about what this ship means say it's an abusive relationship. Bullshit. I wouldn't be shipping them if so.

Also the people still stating it's not real/canon hiding themselves behind the "Ben solo is dead lol" argument. Do you stop loving someone when they die?

Yes, they love each other. No, it wasn't always reciprocated love. They started being enemies in the force awakens, friends who understood and cared for each other through force dyad in the last jedi and ended up being lovers at the end of the rise of Skywalker. Rey wants to revenge her family (her falling to the dark side) but also wants Ben Solo back, and he wants to be the most powerful leader on the galaxy and still being kylo ren. But they eventually meet in the middle between light and dark and Leia finally reaches out to him to make him turn to the light.That's their fight. That's the angst. That's the tea. "No one is ever really gone" there's always hope. Star Wars is centered in HOPE. And their story represents it at its finest.

NOW. The reylo community.

Despite you liked it or not the end they gave to the saga... I think JJ Abrams doesn't deserve all the hate he's receiving... he probably did a lot of things wrong but seriously... just stop. Not only from reylos but the whole fandom.

Sending hate won't lead to anything now...

I enjoyed The rise of Skywalker. Indeed I spent half of the movie crying and I loved it.

You can cry as much as you want the loss of Ben (although I have hope for him still being alive in a way, there are plenty of theories) but that doesn't give you the right to death threat JJ. And I think I'll stop here cause I'm already tired.

Everyone has their own taste, preferences, favourite characters, ships, whatever. I pray for people stop judging others for their tastes, specially in this cursed fanbase. Sorry if I ever misbehaved trying to defend what I think or like. I just want this place to be supportive and safe for everyone and everything what's happening is not helping... We are all SW fans and that's our connection point. Dont discredit others for having another point of view...

I'll leave it here, but I'm open to debate or talk about anything I said in a respectful way.

[garrusknight]

To the anonymous who wrote this to garrusxnightbound: "can you shut up about the nb project, like you left and it should be in your past now, grow up and solve your shit out like an adult (im assuming you are one, but considering the way you’re dragging this shit out, you’re probs immature as hell)"

Dear anonymous,

I don't want to interfere or hurt your feelings but garrusxnightbound doesn't deserve what you said. Actually no one deserves a message like that because that could hurt the feelings of someone. If someone would send you something like this then you wouldn't like it either, right? @garrusxnightbound has the right to post whatever they want because this is his blog and if you don't like it, then just continue scrolling and ignore. That's much better than writing that ask you did and using words like "shut up", "solve your shit" or "immature as hell". We're in a Choices fandom and we should stick together. Besides, "at the moment" garrusxnightbound just posts some edits to show, it's the other anon who still ask him questions about his connection to the project. And well, he just answers them how he feels. He's the real founder of @nightboundfanfiction and people just want to know what happened and if they should still support them or not. He's a really friendly guy who still wishes the nb team good luck and the way he praises the blogs he admires in this blog and in his old brycebound blog where he even posted good things about them (like @clansayeed ; @ ladylamrian ; @ distantshoresproject ; @itlivesproject ; @ ... and more). That's so sweet. I agree, all these blogs are great :)

Enough about him, let him rest. I hope you're alright anonymous and having a good time. I just hope you and every other heartbreaker understands that no negativity among the fandom is beeing wished and tolerated. Take a break, relax, drink a lot of water and take care <3

Thank you Anon for having my back.

I really do want to put this toxicity behind me and move on to happier times but I also need to get some things off my chest and not suffer in silence.

I was in a toxic situation caused by the current book lead. I really wish I had done something sooner and had done a better job at handling things and not have all the innocent members associated but I was in such despair that I feared speaking out until it was too late.

My two biggest mistakes in this were 1). trusting the wrong person and not paying attention to red flags and 2). not doing a better job at keeping the rest of the team members safe from all of this.

Let's be clear that the rest of the team members are also victims in this and deserve better and I failed to give them that.

Now as far as wondering if you can support the project while still supporting me the answer is yes you can! Just as I don't support Joss Whedon for his toxic behavior I also acknowledge that his associated work is separate and that not everyone on those projects was toxic.

You can absolutely support the work of these creators while also supporting me and my work at the same time.

I believe both can coexist.

[attackfish]

I feel so sad that people don't appreciate Ursa's character, especially in the comics. In the show, she was only a loving mother with a secret surrounding her. She had almost no characterization beyond that. The comics showed us a much more complex and interesting character (and I don't think the comics contradict anything in the show), and even though she was not perfect, I don't think she deserves all the hate she gets.

Almost all of the hate Ursa gets in this fandom is from fans who want someone other than Azula to blame for Azula’s cruelty. You can also find these same people talking about how Iroh is terrible and sexist, and if he had been a better uncle, he would have fixed his niece the way he did his nephew, or that Mai and Ty Lee are terrible for “betraying” Azula, and if they had been better friends it would have fixed her, or that Zuko is a bad brother and should have fixed Azula. Basically everybody is responsible for fixing Azula except Azula.

This alone is infuriating, as I talk about in my last reblog here: [Link] because it makes Azula’s mental health and actions other people’s responsibility. This is abuser logic and it’s Azula’s own. She believes she has the right to use other people to prop up her own sense of self without their consent, and if they refuse, as Mai and Ty Lee did, they have wronged her. Mai, Ty Lee, and Zuko are all victims of her abuse, and most arguments that they shouldn’t have “abandoned” or “betrayed” her focus on the fact that she needed them to maintain her equilibrium, or that she really did love them deep down, because her needs and feelings must take preeminence over those of her victims. Her needs deserve to be catered to, and her victims’ should be scorned as selfish and suppressed. Iroh and Ursa are not Azula’s victims, but the fannish logic is the same, the idea that they are selfish for not filling Azula’s emotional needs and thereby fixing her.

This logic interacts in a really poisonous way with society’s expectations of mothers, and this is one part of why the Ursa hate is so virulent. The other reason, I think is simply that she is a minor character and doesn’t have the fanbase to drown out the haters. There is of course no way to be a perfect mother, because mothers are people and people can’t be perfect. And yet the idea of imperfection on the part of a mother is one that we as a society are extremely uncomfortable with. Mothers in media are rarely allowed the same range of humanity as other characters, because we are uncomfortable with their independent humanity and the evidence that they have needs and wants separate from those related to the task of being mother. Real life mothers find their every decision critiqued in relation to how it might affect her children.

Mothers and the choices they make are credited with a near-magical ability to save or ruin their children. Back in the mid twentieth century, a frightening amount of ink was spilled blaming every conceivable psychiatric or developmental condition on mothers. If a mother was too affectionate, she would make her son gay, not affectionate enough, autistic. If she was one way, she could make her child schizophrenic, another, she could make them mentally retarded. She had to be perfect, and if anything went wrong, we knew who to blame. This attitude did not fade away as we learned the underlying causes of many diseases. Growing up, I got to watch doctors, teachers, and just general busybodies blame my brother’s and my own problems on my mother, problems that through my parents’ persistence would be diagnosed as an immune disorder. The difference, I might add, between how my mother was treated and how my father was is stark. So Azula is manifestly and obviously screwed up. In our current societal milieu, it’s not at all surprising that fans looking for a reason would almost reflexively blame her mother. It’s what we do. The fact that Azula had an obvious abusive father does not matter.

There’s another reason Azula fans who are looking for someone to blame for Azula’s actions will look to Ursa instead of Ozai, and that reason is Zuko. Zuko was Ozai’s unfavorite child, the one who was burned and cast off, while Azula was praised and cosseted. If Zuko could overcome the “worse” abuse, what excuse would Azula have? She must have an excuse, since what we are trying to do here after all is justify her behavior. This ignores of course how toxic and damaging being the favorite of somebody like Ozai actually is, and how terrifying being one fall from grace away from being treated like Zuko must have been, something I argue in my Three Pillars Theory of Azula: [Link]. I also have in fact witnessed what the kind of mothering Ursa’s staunchest critics claim she should have given Azula looks like in the real world, and it is not pretty: [Link]

The Azula fans who hold Ursa, or for that matter Iroh, Zuko, Mai, or Ty Lee, responsible for Azula’s actions often claim they want a redemption arc for her similar to the one Zuko got, however, this is pretty clearly not the case. One of the big themes of Zuko’s redemption and recovery arc is that he had to acknowledge fault. He had to acknowledge that yes, he was hurt and hurting, and thought he was doing right, but that he had hurt other people and needed to make amends. People who want to blame other people for Azula’s actions want to absolve her of the very responsibility Zuko learned to shoulder. Another major theme of Zuko’s redemption and recovery arc is that nobody could “fix” Zuko, which is to say nobody could do the emotional work of coming to realize both that he had been wronged by his father and should not try to please him, and that he had hurt people in the name of pleasing his father and in the name of Fire Nation imperialism, except for Zuko himself. Nobody could make amends on Zuko’s behalf, or heal his hurts. Zuko had to do that himself. Iroh could advise and support him, but he couldn’t do it for Zuko, or make Zuko’s choices for him. Most of the Azula fans who want somebody else to blame also want to give her somebody who will love away her damage and pain and make her a good person, which isn’t the way it works, and also is deeply deeply ironic, given that one of the biggest things Azula has to work on is her sense of entitlement to use others to fulfill her emotional needs.