#my absolute base rate is 260/hr so now you owe me money & u can either pay up or get the fuck away from me
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#when the episode starts to feel like i need to delete all of my social media and drastically change my entire life#i said that it didnt feel BAD this time but also it doesnt feel much of anything at all in relation to anyone or anything else#but dealing with the severity of my cptsd at the same time SUCKS FUCKING ASS. agoraphobia is so fucking annoying#like oooh what if i go outside and there are people there and they percieve me!! like .then you GET percieved get the fuck over it!!!#nightwalks are nice though ... idk i fucking hate being outside during the day esp around the times that kids r going to and from school#idk why it just brings back stress... like lol &too many men try to talk to me and these freaks literally feign to need help with direction#just to get me to stop pretending i dont hear them its actually unhinged. no i dont want to go to a coffee shop to smell the coffe beans w/#the FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN ASNFSKFDNDSJD that one cracks me up still helpskjdsfhgdfh#THE FUCK DO I NEED TO WEAR TO GET THE MESSAGE ACROSS IM N O T I N T E R E S T E D G O A W A Y#my absolute base rate is 260/hr so now you owe me money & u can either pay up or get the fuck away from me#okay whatever im gonna either go for a walk or get groceries so i feel less whatever this is and schizoposting is prob not helping lmao#UGH#dane cook is disgusting but i hear the bit about yeah youre gonna hear a lot of cars for the rest of your life in my head so often#bc literally. my body is like SOMEONE IS LOOKING AT US!!!#and its like yes. people have eyes. and they can see you like you can see them. this will continue to happen forever.#and it honestly helps LMFAO#i could take shrooms and walk to the forest waitamin...#once my body stops having an extremely dramatic allergic reaction to that bug bite ill be able to work and feel normal again ughhhhhhhhhhh#x
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