#my OCs are simply my preference
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How do you envision Madara and Izuna meeting their wives (your OCs)? It's always interesting to hear people's thoughts on how their imagination ties into canon.
Hi there, anon! This question made me smile, and made my heart flutter in excitement.
Itâs not a simple question as I have two different headcanons that are âcanonâ in my imagination. It is also here that a few details for certain headcanons change (the clan headcanons for example), as I want to be flexible for the sake of the stories I write (and sometimes I prefer more historical accuracy mixed in with my imagination)
But in general there are two different parallel timelines I tend to work with:
They met each other young (not childhood friends per se)
They meet each other when grown and their marriage(s) were arranged (I have not played with this headcanon too much, but it is fun to explore how the âromanticâ angle would work in such a dynamic)
The below headcanons are linked with Warring States and my Reiki stories (it is a touch more historically accurate, with certain things).
It is the first one that tends to be the backstory for the four of them. Madara and Izuna meet Ayame and Saki for the first time after the latter two save Izunaâs life (he nearly drowned during a skirmish in winter). They are humble healers (not chakra healers, but they are the pair that âinventâ that type of healing so to speak) and have sworn neutrality in the feud between the clans (they were born in the Uchiha clan and come from a quite talented shinobi/samurai lineage, but their parents willingly lowered their status to farmers/peasants). They offer their aid to any clan (be it Senju or Uchiha or any other).
They do not grow up together through, but they spend about two years together, becoming friends (worldview and dialects is something that clash at first) eventually. It is not âloveâ at first sight, but âaffectionâ.
While marriage is done out of love, Tajima is the one overseeing each and every arrangement so to make sure that there is no mistreatment involved. There are also a few more cases of political marriages in the Warring States/Reiki universe (to stay in good grace with their allied clans). Tajima and his wife, and the parents of Ayame and Saki actually arrange a sort of âmarriageâ for the four of them the moment aware that affection is very strong and promising (the marriage in question would only take place when they were of age, though, and neither of the children knew about the agreement until they were older).
Ayame in particular spends about 4 years without seeing Madara the moment she starts to âbleedâ as she is trained to become a miko priestess (tradition for the oldest daughter) as well as getting training in becoming a âworthy bride/wifeâ. It is during her training, and travels, that she meets Uzumaki Mito and they end up forming a lifelong friendship eventually. She also awakens her Sharingan during this time (an extremely rare occurrence for women) as sexuality and her role as a female entity (and all it entails) is what breaks down her self enough for the Sharingan to manifest.
Eventually she is reunited with Madara and it is during that reunion that their feelings of affection flares up into passion, that also deepens into love and the certainty that they want each other as companions/lovers, and they spend a night together - revealing their feelings for one another.
It is when Madara becomes clan head that he makes Ayame his wife officially (who by that time, due to certain events, has returned to the clan of their birth - as that would have to be the only condition for their marriage to be allowed).
Izuna and Saki might fit the âchildhood friendsâ clichĂŠ a tad more than their older siblings. Saki never undergoes the training of a priestess, as her metamorphosis into a woman starts later than for Ayame (who, to her own grief, was extremely early). She lives at home with her parents and older brother, caring for the sick and injured, as well as working on their âchakra healingâ theory as well as educating herself through the books their father keeps bringing them. She spends more time with Izuna, but not a lot, as the war/s are still raging.
Their sexual explorations are not as early as their siblings, but they are not the âno sex before marriageâ individuals becauseâŚcuriosity. They are also aware of their feelings in a different way to their older siblings.
The thing with Izuna and Saki is that (in Warring States/Reiki universe) they never enter wedlock, as Izuna dies in the very skirmish where they promised they would make it official the moment he returns home.
Ayame and Saki are also trained as âunofficial shinobis/kunoichisâ. They start their training late (around 16 and 14) for shinobi standards (at the time), but they manage regardless to become the two strongest women in the clan, and even of their generation (together with Uzumaki Mito). History, however, erases their contributions on the medical ninjutsu front. Or, rather, barely knows from where it originated in the first place.
I tend to have them develop the MangekyĹ Sharingan and be the first women to do so (Naori, filler character as she is, is the third woman to ever do so).
That is how I tend to have them meet. But the other dynamic is pretty much an âarranged marriageâ scenario (without the âchildhood friendsâ trope) and that would be the most historically accurate portrayal of how marriage probably would work in that period of the Narutoverse (we all have our biases and preferences, though).
It all depends what dynamic I want to explore.
But no matter which dynamic they end up in, their relationship becomes a strong partnership full of love, trust and respect, in the end.
While this question is focused on the canonverse (I assume so at least), I will thrown in a bonus about AUs (modern world mostly):
They meet quite young (early twenties) and it is here that the greatest changes in dynamic happens, as the backstory for Madara and Izuna is altered more (or less) to fit the âmodern worldâ.
While each and every story focuses on psychology in some shape or form, in AUs this psychology becomes to most ârealâ and âhumanâso to speak.
ââ
Thank you so much for your question, anon. It was a lot of fun to answer as my OCs are very dear to my heart (unpopular opinion, I know).
All the best and take care o/
#madara uchiha#izuna uchiha#uchiha oc#headcanons#thoughts#anon ask#a slightly more personal answer than most#each ask requires a personal answer in a way#but this particular question is probably the most personal for me#I respect if you ship Madara and Izuna with other characters#everyone has their preference - and that is wonderful to see :)#my OCs are simply my preference
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During my college U.S. history class we go over a LOTTTT of religious stuff in regards to how foundational it is in our government/society; in response, I simply draw my cleric w/ some crewmates
#my art#graphite scribbles#Enososin Folook#Soleil (OC)#Ulysses (OC)#Abaddon Diallos#first one is the difference in her face between 'hasn't spotted anyone yet' vs 'person spotted'#the rest are mostly just whatever struck my fancy in that moment of time <3#and in regards to the last image; the celtic cross is simply a personal preference of mine in regards to flavoring the religious item.#this preference was DEFINITELY inflicted on me by my mom (we are a very scots-irish family) /very jovial#and it influences alllll my characters lmao#rea's trash
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(RE)CREATION
"Listen: I know I'm not that same voice and shape you adore so much. I'm just a borrowed mirror of that same shape and voice... I'm not even a full recreation of it either, but you know what?
My (re)creator still puts care on me. She nurtured me when no one else did. She respected my fears and doubts when no one listened. She made a whole little world for me to try new paths that felt more aligned with my true desires.
And in exchange, she only wanted for me to always be there for her. When she most felt down. When everyone else ignored her. When her world felt cold and cruel. And I did. I keep hanging here, in her heart. In her mind.
I want you to do the same with that (re)creation you hold to. Because no matter what others do with the original copy from where we come: I will always be unique to you, like how I'm unique to my (re)creator.
I'm as real as you need me to be. When you take care of yourself, you'll take care of me too." -Oscen.
Cheer up for @magicalmousey in lil mouse form + my creaturified Starscream/Mind Servitor, Oscen đŚ
My virtual way to send you lots of hugs!
#myart#windydrawallday ventart#vent art#windydrawallday ocs#windy ocs oscen#even if vent art is something i wished to get out of my chest now that i feel a bit more calm after some re scheduling for an event#im still fighting the cringy feel of mixing my fictional fixations with my magical/witchy experimentations#but this is a taste of it i think#YEAH I USE CHARACTERS TO COPE DAILY STRUGGLES#but i prefer this than to simply give into anxiety hole at full#and im a believer that for each character interpretation those can work as guardian angels of sorts for the person#i got quite a bunch hahaha and every time i draw them#i tap into their energies and they feel more alive to me than ever#if some of ya feel identified with these words know that: i support ya to the moon and back#witchy side of the wind
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This man brings me joy
#my art#rw oc#rw iterator oc#rainworld#rain world#rw iterator#rw oc revolt of transcendence#tw spiders#they are drawn simply but I prefer to be safe than sorry
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i think the only thing that would make the xarrastarion harper ending au work is acknowledging theyâre not Good harpers. theyâre actively bad harpers. like i donât think they would Stop extorting people (explicitly against the harper code) and would not go all that far out of their way to help anyone without expecting compensation (again. against harper code) and are like, not really That concerned with the consequences of their actions usually. but Also theyâre both personally invested in like, freedom and ending slavery and tyranny to some extent, and are definitely very good at the sort of manipulation that makes up most of harper work. and like the idea of them as absolutely piss poor harpers Morally but extremely effective when it comes to Getting Things Done is so so so silly. theyâre like jaheiraâs problem children. theyâre wandering up and down the sword coast breaking most of the harper rules and flashing their little harper pins like get out of jail free cards but theyâre also absolutely able to dismantle entire slaver operations in a day and a half. theyâre just also claiming at least half of the loot for themselves instead of redistributing it
#i think jaheira would love it. honestly. she prefers awful half feral creatures to her own children so she would support their bullshit 100%#itâs just like. the harpers are more or less Good Aligned. and ur simply not gonna catch xarrastarion being Good#xar is solidly chaotic neutral and thatâs the Best ur going to get from them. and astarion? god.#that guy may be able to pull off a neutral alignment. but he certainly isnât going to be Good.#but even with that like. i think xar could be persuaded to Be A Harper by jaheira and i think astarion is whipped enough to go along with it#i think theyâre kind of doing the same thing either way wrt to like#taking out the remaining banite enclaves on the coast and in mulmaster#IDK!#I STILL DONT KNOW IF ITS CANON but if itâs not they rly are just vibing for the next 50+ years#which is also sick. but i think having a job would be good for astarion LOL#it would make for a nice way to demonstrate like#the shift from xarrai (and u could argue astarion) working within oppressive systems to try to affect personal change#to working Outside these systems to dismantle them instead#since the harpers are like. their own group w/o hierarchy or organization and those things were once Very Important to both of these guys#theyâre no longer bound to the system or by a sense of hierarchy or power theyâre only bound by What They Want To Do#柍č¨#oc. xarrai#r. hold me like a knife#i found this post in my drafts and itâs still real as fuck honestly
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tangled up like branches in a flood
I headcanon River to be a big softy bottom that enjoys being bossed around but is always expected to be a big strong top by his partners. Dove has a horrible relationship to sex and what it means in the context of a relationship, albeit casual. They're working through it together.
#cyberpunk 2077#cp 2077#oc: dove#dove x river#reminder my headcanon is not yours#and that's cool#đ¤#I'm simply borrowing an established character to flesh out my own oc#something I'd prefer to do oc x oc but alas đĽł#look at him that's a man that likes to get pegged and ridden
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Here's some other Busys I've drawn recently đ
#keese draws#oc art#oc#eternal gales#I should rly draw like. every other eternal gales character more. but also why do that when I can keep drawing busy.#shes also simply easier to draw than most the rest of the cast#like I love the staliens but some of their horns make me want to throw myself off a bridge#and we all know how I feel abt drawing humans#so left over we have busy and dancer and I prefer busy's shapes so she wins#also I preffer her colors but that matters less for some doodles#I've been rly wanting to draw some sketch comics with the eg cast but I have like no ideas for short scenes these fuckers talk too much#but I rly want to start getting into the habit of making sketchy comics just so I can get used to the format#motivation is alas hard even with all the ideas in the world I would still struggle but for now Im able to blame lack of ideas so I shall#anyways I need to go shower and rotate eternal gales in my head
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if Valerio doesnât eat meat, does it mean heâs a vegetarian?
Nope. He just doesnât like the taste of meat whether itâs pork, beef, chicken, or anything else. But he loves fish and seafood in general so he cannot be considered a vegetarian.
#Ask me anything#My OCs#Valerio Ălvarez#Okay I mentioned it twice in the fic and never specified that he still eats fish but okay XD#He used to live by the sea donât mind him#My idea was that in the guard school they just ALWAYS ate meat#like true~ men or whatever#It was fine first few months but then little Valerio got tired of eating the same thing again and again#and then just looking at meat made him sick so now when heâs an adult he simply doesnât want to eat it because he doesnât like it#Another reason why he escaped from school is that he wanted to get normal food lol#Itâs probably extremely stupid so Iâm not gonna state it in the fic :âD#He just doesnât eat meat except for fish and thatâs it#Nothing supernatural#Let the man have food preferences#Anyway thank you for this question Iâm now thinking a lot about Valerio again#specifically about young Valerio#because heâs fascinating at every age#(sorry)#Okay I made some research#and it turns out people who donât eat meat except for fish and seafood are called pescatarians?#I donât know how much it fits Valerio since heâs not following a specific diet and he has no vegetarianism beliefs#He just doesnât like the taste x)#Anyway heâs a pescatarian without knowing it ajhsnfjfk#Are you a pescatarian? Well no but actually yes
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" đđ đđđđ "
đđđđđđđ!đđđđđđ đ đđđđđđ â For so long, he found art in his surroundings, nature was his muse . . who would've thought that he'd be able to find another muse, within you.
gender neutral reader / yandere oc x reader / obsessive / unhealthy themes / I guess the reader is his 'hater' / perfectionist yandere / kind of egotistic yandere / he has a praise kink frfr / maybe a bit self centered . . / kind of unedited / also might appeal to ppl with a savior complex
masterlist | requesting rules | character info . . . a/n: I feel like Lore takes up a good chunk of this fic, but enjoy . . also might be one of my longest fics . .
He was a calming presence, and a thoughtful friend to all he called his own. Elegance took a human form, in Xavier WilsonâA beautiful work of art indeed . . Born presenting a talent that could rival many others in the industry.
From a young age, Xavier presented himself as a man of the arts, often drawing out vivid tapestries of his dreams or memories. He would often lose himself in the pages of his notebook, scribbling away with intricate drawings and stories, his mind was his own magnum opus.
Howeverâpeople was never his strong suit. It left a bitter taste in his mouth, surely if he was as magnificent as those around him expressed, he'd most certainly be able to recreate the portraits of those around him?âBut no, none of his portraits could compare to his various other works.
As he got a bit older, his mother decided to enroll him in classes that could help expand his talents, which ranged from various music lessons, theater (didn't end well), art historyâetc . . .
Xavier let out a breathy sigh, staring at the keys of the grand piano absentmindedlyâhis gloved fingers gently glide over the keys, tired would be the best way to describe him as of right nowâhis professor had left an hour ago, yet Xavier couldn't find it in himself to move.
Truth be told, Xavier wasn't a fan of music, he preferred quiet solitudeâand though he had long since gotten used to the sound of the piano, violin, and any of the other ridiculous instruments his mother was so keen on getting him to playâhe still preferred the silence over all.
Over the course of time, Xavier disinterest towards music dimmedâAlongside his distaste towards instruments . . He figured the reason he disliked it so much was due to his inability to play as perfectly as his professor . . Xavier was a perfectionist, and anything he couldn't perfect was simply 'wrong' in his eyes, and as he reached his teen years, he accepted that fact wholeheartedly.
Xavier stood still, as his mother fixed his tie for himâhe could do it himself but he let her enjoy this moment, she always disliked watching her son 'grow up so fast'â"are you nervous?", she asked softly, gently holding his hands, smiling so brightly.
'Am I nervous?â' he thought, clearly not. He felt calm, neutral even. It was his first big show, yet internally he knew that things would end well for him, he could feel it. He's always been lucky, in fact his father's nickname for him as a child was quite literally 'Puer aureus' which translated to 'the golden boy' from Latin.
He clicked his tongue, a common habit of hisâespecially when he wasn't being exactly truthfulâhe paused for a moment as if to think, then he smiled at his mother, "Just a bit, but I'll be fine" he spoke calmly, gently squeezing her hand to reassure her. "Don't worry, I've prepared well for this . . Haven't I?"
Praise, he adored praise, and that day he received quite a lot of itânot just from his parents, or acquaintances . . .âbut crowds of people. Honestly, it stroked his ego, quite a bit . .
By seventeen years of age, Xavier's talent was known worldwide, his rise to fame quite massive and fast . . He had to attend class, while also hosting live performances and art galleries. (such a struggle, really . . .)
University admissions were coming around, and most of his friends had chosen what schools they plan on applying toâwhat path they plan on going intoâwhat school they hope to go to the most, the conversation was an eye opener and yet it all felt so bitter.
Xavier tapped his pen on the table, zoning out from the conversation his friends were having . . only to zone back in when Neva spoke, "âso Xavier, have you decided where you'll be applying too . . ? I'm sure you'll get in."
He clicked his tongue in response, closing his eyes absentmindedly as he spoke, "To be honest, not really . . probably something arts related?", Xavier was about to speak up again but stopped himself, starring down at the table, a sigh escaping his lips.
"That seems like a waste of money", he looked up, starring at Oliver with questioning eyes, and Oliver quickly explained himself, "Art school is great and allâBut it won't really make much of a difference for you, in fact the rules could restrict your talent . . It could be better for you to just try something new? You're good in school a degree outside of your comfort zone may be something good for you!"
He hated that his friend was right, he hated being wrong. He prided himself for always knowing what was best for himself and his abilities, and in a spur of pettiness he found himself taking art anyway, trying to prove his friend wrong . . even though he was well aware his intentions were pure in all ways.
Xavier had done well in his courses so far, and with his fame, he was breezing through classesâand yet, when the topics of portraits came up . . he found all that floating out the window.
None of the models they had for class, felt rightânone of the art he did, felt authentic . . felt like himself, when it came to art, Xavier took everyone to paradise, his art felt like peace . . his art was calm . . his music was soft, lulling almost . .
Yet now, as he stared at his canvas, covered in mixed harsh colours, a vibrant mess of paint, his brushes wrecked, paint dripping from the easel . . It felt like anything but calm.
And that's when he dropped out, a question to his perfection would wreck the fragile image of himself he had created in his mind, a man so perfect and lucky in his own right a humbling experience like that was to never see the light of day.
Xavier found himself turning to something different, just like Oliver suggested, his alternatives were selective, yet he kept many paths open, Photography, fashion, and business were his top picks and things he found himself surprisingly enjoying . . Surely if he could paint and create melodies of such wonders, then he can stitch some fabric together, solve a few equations, and take a few photo's here and there just fine . . right?
A few years had past, and Xavier was now running his very own Luxury fashion line, he still hosted art galleries here and there, and composed music on the side, but his business took up most of his time.
But on his free days he'd turn to photography, taking pictures of things he sought comfort in . . and people, he'd often take pictures of unsuspecting people, pretty ones . . people not so pretty as well, just to try and recreate the life they had on a canvas . . yet somehow always failing to do so.
The moment Xavier found himself close, he'd reach a dead end . . and that destroyed him, internally.
Over the years, he accepted the small flaws in his behavior, and tried his best to reform them, presenting himself as the perfect public figure. He did go to therapy in the past, but when things started rising up, he quit entirely.
Xavier laid back on his office chair, and scrolled through his recent posts comment section, and as expected almost all of it was praise . . some of envy, but that only fueled his ego more . . Until he found a comment that set him off, "His art is so melancholy, it feels a bit sad . . His previous works were brighter, like more happy but now it kind of feels sad . . Like the life in his work isn't there anymore."
Xavier stared at the comment dumbfounded, never had he received that kind of feedback . . portraits he drew were indeed lifeless, but his other art was always regarded as lively, and that was what he always strived for . . Curious, and in a fit of rage . . he clicked on the commenters profile, and saw you.
You, you . . You were what he was looking for, his muse. So, full of life . . He scrolled through your page, and couldn't help but feel the urge to draw you, and paint you . . and paint you he did. . Because soon his entire studio was filled with pieces inspired by you . . so full of 'life' . . .
Yet at some point, he had reached the end of your posts, and it just wasn't enough . . he needed you . . He wanted your feedback, he craved your praise . . like no other, he wanted input . . he wanted to know if his work was truly still lifeless . . he wanted you.
After all, a artist isn't complete without his muse.
@ rxmye , do not repost, plagiarize, translate, or adapt my work/theme without prior permission and or confirmation.
#yandere#yandere oc x reader#yandere oc#yandere x reader#yandere headcanons#yandere imagines#yandere x darling#yandere blog#yandere boy#male yandere#yandere male#tw yandere#soft yandere#yandere boyfriend#yandere community#yandere bf#male yandere x reader#yandere x y/n#yandere x you#yandere writing#yandere thoughts#yandere scenarios#yanblr#yan blog#obsessive yandere#yandere drabble#yandere blurb#yan oc#yan x reader#yancore
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the curious lifespan of migrating monarchs - jjk
THE CURIOUS LIFESPAN OF MIGRATING MONARCHS (& other aurelian affairs)
pairing: streamer!jk x international student!female oc (s2l)
warnings:Â strangers to lovers, clubbing, foul language, alcohol, vaping lol, jungkook is kinda famous, the oc is oblivious, the oc is also a foreign student who has very recently arrived in Korea!! (pls note - while i've been in korean uni dorms, i've never been in yonsei dorms specifically so don't shout at me if it isn't supeeeerr accurate), jaykay is speaking in eng for like 90% of this!!, i've also never watched a gaming streamer and had to do so for research lmao so there's a lot of guesswork going awwwn <3, the oc has tattoos, they bond over this, cute nicknames (tokki and nabi <3), one bed trope?? kinda, jaykay lives w/ yoongi and tae (they are streamers too (and dj?? (tae is a bit unhinged))), jungkook wears calvins!, a singular appearance of yoongi in his boxers!!, tipsy hookup, fingering, protected sex (woo!), desk sex, oral (m receiving), girliepop swallows <3, brief mentions of jungkook's starry eyes, lots of kisses, bunny ears, (1) mention of cross-fit
wordcount:Â 13011
note from holly: this was a commission done for the lovely Michelle over on my kofi page!! i don't open commissions often, but when I do I'm very lucky that the requests are so much fun. this actually ended up being way longer than it was supposed to be lol and is also available on wattpad!! also fun facts for you - I imagine the boys apartment (and jks room!) to be same as jk + jimins place in BD, just a little bigger lmao
minors dni // cross posted to wattpad
CLUB SUNDOWN WAUSAN-RO, HONGDAE SATURDAY 02:24
Time ceases to exist after the sun goes down in Seoul. It could be two, or it could be five. The only thing that really clues you in on the actual time is the DJ schedule that lights up behind the decks: 02:00-03:00, Blu-Tae.
It's some guy you've never heard of. Looks no older than you. Probably a student, just like the rest of the crowd.
His hair is as blue as his namesake, which does make you smile, and his choices aren't bad either (even if somewhat questionable). You've never heard a jazz remix of Darude's Sandstorm before, and you doubt you ever will again.
Club Sundown is just as rogue as the rest of the city after the sun goes down. Hidden in the basementâlike all the best places in Seoul areâthe small room is packed to the absolute brim.
Who cares for views and sunsets offered by rooftop bars when you could lose yourself in the debauchery of an eternal midnight, instead?
Drinks are spilt on strangers, and dances have lost the grandeur of old-fashioned waltzes. It's not like you could dance properly, even if you wanted to. There's just simply no space.
Like Alice, you're down the rabbit holeâand oh, how you prefer it to being in the real world. In the shadows, you can be anyone you like.
If you were sober, you'd know this is also the case for daily life. You're in a new country with no ties to your former self. Who you are is who you choose to be.
But the shadows aren't all that dark. The red lights of the club bleed into the cracks, painting everyone in the same subtle hue of danger.
They shine a little light on the identifiers of you; the thin black lines of your patchwork tattoos. Trailing up your arm, they're memories of your past selves, and an indicator of who you hope to become.
"Down this," you say to your dormmate, Rae, handing back over the drink you've just ordered from the bar. "Cloakroom, then dance."
Still carrying your winter coats, you'd wanted to check the place out before committing to it. Entry is free, but the cloakroom is the same price as a drink. It would only be worth putting your coats away if you knew you wanted to stayâand given the fact the DJ was playing O-Zone's Dragostea Din Tei as you entered, you know it's a no-brainer. While his stage name might make you roll your eyes a little, Blu-Tae certainly does cater to your tastes. When you're drunk, and music vibrates through you, it's empyrean. No place you'd rather be.
"Oh, Jesus," Rae gags as she sips the drink you've just handed her. Despite her disgust, she's laughing. Head to toe in black, dark hair loose around her shoulders, she's been your ride-or-die since you arrived in Seoul. Both international students in the same dorm, there's no one you'd rather get up to no good with. "Vodka?!"
You beam at her like you're from the heavens above, wrongfully relegated to the depths of sin. Pretend like you love vodka. It's totally not like you panicked when you saw the menu was all in Korean.
Vodka-coke is a universally understood delicacyâthe easiest thing for you to order without making a tit of yourself or butchering the pronunciation. When the bartender ignored your botched attempt at ordering in Korean and answered in fluent English, you'd wanted to melt into the floor. So embarrassing.
You're here, like most foreign students, for a language course. Semester is yet to start, and as much as you've studied and practised hard, it's always different when putting it into practice.
"I'm sorry," you laugh. "It's fineâyou can order next time!"
But Rae has the exact same predicament as you. If anything, your language skills are better than hers, so you really have no hope. It's vodka-cokes for the evening, or maybe highballs. Once your tipsy brain manages to compute hangul cocktail names, you'll be golden, but that won't be for another few weeks, yet.
You'll look back at this time of your life fondly, realising how simple it all was, even if it feels incredibly overwhelming right now.
Funnily enough, hope is exactly what you have: for the semester ahead, for this new life you're forging, for the opportunities that may come your way.
In fact, by the time you're on your third vodka coke, you've managed to convince yourself you actually like it. You also can't taste it, thanks to the bartender freepouring a 60-40 ratio of vodka to coke in the first drink. Your tastebuds were wiped out pretty much instantly.
Coats in the cloakroom, you're glad to be wearing thin layers. The room is stuffy; your skin sweaty. While meeting new friends had been the goal, you keep to yourself. Dance like nobody is watching. Hold Rae's hands to stay close and ward off weirdos. Quickly realise that clubs back home are slightly different. Pay it no mind. Ignore the intrusions of hands on waists, because men, disappointingly, are no different.
Or at least most of them aren't.
But most of them don't look like the man in the corner booth, laughing with his friends.
Though he is tall, he's eclipsed by his demeanour. Shoulders broad, he's in a dark T-shirt and pair of jeans. Nothing special. Nothing that warrants such a perplexed stare from you - but he's familiar. You can't place him, but he's got the kind of face you swear you've seen before.
Rae doesn't notice the change in your poise, nor how you're desperately trying to work out where you know him from. Perhaps you've seen him around your university? It's only been a couple of weeks, but people are steadily moving in. Maybe he works at the convenience store you constantly find yourself in? Or mans the front desk of the noraebang you and Rae visit pretty much every other evening?
Impossible, you think. If you'd seen him before, you wouldn't have forgotten him, or the way he constantly toys with his lip rings. Plural. There are signs up around the place stating bar rules. NO SMOKING is rule number three. You've seen his friends pass him over a vape a handful of times. Anyone else, and you'd think it was cringe. Embarrassing.
But in the midst of his laughter settling, and a fresh toke being inhaled, his eyes flicker towards yours.
Perhaps it's just because you're drunk, but you don't avert your gaze. Show no shame. The smile on his lips sinks into a smirk as he exhales. An acknowledgement. A 'hello, trouble'.
Again, any other man, you'd find the vape smoke repugnant. Nasty. Now? Watching the way he flicks his tongue against his lip rings?
You wanna know how it tastes.
Black ink weaves an intricate outline of who he is up his arms. Where he's been. Who he's been. A map, if you will, of his soul.
Much like your own tattoos, he's got thick black lines, and little else. Simple, you assume. A man of convenience. Efficiency.
You wonder if he does everything in life with the precision to match his tattoos, and as your lips wrap around the straw of your vodka-coke, you decide you'd quite like to find out.
Interrupted by Rae pulling you deeper into the crowd, your night is spent in and out of shadows. Attempt subtlety. Try not to make your occasional glances to the corner booth noticeable, just checking if his eyes are still on you. More often than not, they aren'tâbut sometimes they are, and that's enough to fuel your little flirt.
It's not until the sign behind the DJ booth changes from 03:00-04:00, GLOSS into some other guy that you notice your staring contest opponent has slipped into the shadows himself. The booth is void of both him and his friends. Gone.
"GLOSS has a set at another club," Rae all but yells in your ear, and even then, you barely hear her. "All the hotties left when he did. Let's go."
"Where to?!" You laugh, empty cup in hand. Admittedly, the new guy who's stepped into the DJ booth is just not doing it for you. Blu-Tae was just the right amount of unhinged with classics, whereas GLOSS was definitely cooler, but still fun. Had the club yelling curse words over trap remixes just for the fun of it. This new guy, whose name you don't care to remember, takes himself too seriously, you think.
"It's, like, two blocks down," she yells back, tugging on your wrist to drag you to the stairwell that leads you back up to the streets of Seoul. The hustle and bustle of people trying to go in different directions in the tight place forces you apart, but you figure you'll catch up with her, or that she'll be waiting at the top.
You don't know the roads well enough yet to make it to whichever club it's at alone, and quickly realise when you nearly tumble into the side of a waiting taxi that you're far drunker than expected. Knew the bartender was freepouring, but didn't realise just how free those pours really were.
"Woah, easy trouble," a deep voice sounds from behind you as you're steadied to a more stable position.
"I'm good, I'm good!" You insist, shaking off the hands of your 'saviour'. Have no interest in being a damsel in distress, or some sober guy trying to take advantage of you.
Looking down to check your laces are tied properly, you check over your shoulder to make sure the guy isn't creepily waiting for a thank you that he can turn into an intrusive game of 21 questionsâ'are you open-minded?' or 'do you live alone?'âbut when you glance in his direction, you regret it. Notice the tattoos immediately. Recognise the eyes. Want to die.
"Oh."
"Oh," he says back with a smile, imitating you. Suddenly, the confidence you'd had earlier when looking at him from afar dissolves into nothingness, just like the alcohol in your bloodstream. You feel rather sober, but your body would definitely disagree. "You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah," you nod, suddenly a little stuck for words, desperately trying to play things cool. "Are you okay?"
The pouting of his lips as his tongue runs along the inside of his cheek only serves to make you internally cringe. Men who look like him have no business being on streets like this. Should be in a museum. Strung up on the walls with the other masterpieces. Admired by everyone who looks his way.
In a way you don't yet realise, he is.
Though he's not in galleries, he's often burning into people's laptop screens. Is the background of a fair few thousand lock screens. Indeed, he is admired by everyone who looks his way, just not in the traditional sense.
"I'm not the one who just fell into a car," he reminds you, as if you could forget your embarrassment so quickly.
"Was just seeing if you'd catch me," you bullshit, the confidence you usually have returning tenfold. Was just a momentary blip. He's just a man, after all.
"Oh?" He chirps, decidedly curious. "So you fell for me?"
"Stumbled."
"Semantics."
His fluency, and the fact he just said 'semantics' so casually in conversation, clues you in on the fact he might be a language student, too.Â
Could be useful study partners for each other, you think, then mentally berate yourself for already masterminding ways to see him again.
"So, where you going?" He asks, not caring to downplay his curiosity. The bartenders were free-pouring his drinks just as severely as they poured yours. The only difference is that his were on the houseâ'cause you were right. He does have a recognisable face. "Should probably go with you. Make sure you don't fall into the road."
"Stumble," you insist, a little pleased with the boldness of his suggestion, but not wanting to blindly agree. "My friend," you say glancing around, only to find yourself completely alone. "She wanted to go catch the next GLOSS set. So, I guess that's where we're going."
"Just down the road," he says, knowing the schedule like the back of his hand. Bounces from club to club supporting his friends, just like they would for him. If he wanted, he could get a slot up there, too. He doesn't care for it. "I'll walk with you, if you want? My friends are heading there anyway."
It's not a bad offer.
In fact, it's probably the best offer you'll get all night.
"C'mon," he nods his head to the side, encouraging you to follow him. Checks his phone for the time. "Starts in five."
If there's one thing you've indulged in since moving to Seoul, it's how safe you always feel. Security cameras are on every corner, and you've walked home countless times without any issues, even late into the night. While the place isn't perfect, it's far safer than your home country.
Still, you're not a complete idiot.
"It's not wise to follow strange men down dark alleys," you tell him.
He holds out his hand. Waits for you to shake it. Cocks a brow when you hesitate, so introduces himself.
"Jungkook. Nice to meet you. Now, can we please hurry up? I promised I'd be there."
Narrowing your eyes, you don't shake his hand. Arms folded over your chest, there is ice to your exterior, and given how warm his eyes are, you doubt it'll last for very long. May as well keep up this hard-to-get act while you still can.
Walking on past him, you call back, "Alright then. Lead the way."
In the domed mirror meant for reversing cars at the end of a tight alley, you see him laugh. "Wrong way, idiot."
Pausing, you scrunch your face up. Don't turn to face him for at least a second or soâbut when you do, you're surprised to see him walking towards you. Hooking his arm around your waist, he carries on walking in the 'wrong' direction, taking you with him.
"Was just fucking with you," he grins. Nods towards a sign by another basement entrance, listing both Blu-Tae and GLOSS.
By the door, Rae is looking around like a mother duck who's just lost some of her ducklings when crossing the road. Breathes a sigh of relief when she spots you.
"C'mon," she grins, then realises who you're with. Says nothing of it, 'cause she doesn't want to be weird, but she recognises him, too. Decides she's just had a little too much to drink. There's no way it's him. Holds out her hand for you.
Reaching out for her, you're let go from Jungkook's grip, ready to get lost in the lights once more.
HAEJANG24 WAUSAN-RO, HONGDAE SATURDAY 05:53
Seoul is a city for the nocturnal. The restaurants and bars are open until the last men are standing. Given how much you've had to drink, you're surprised you still are.
Rae had dipped an hour or so ago. Had hit it off with Mr Blu-Tae himself. Seduced him with the suggestion that their couple name would be Blu-Rae. He'd said they should go to a DVD-bang. Would be fitting. See what Blu-rays were on file.
Naturally, you'd looked on with mild disgust and also admiration for how quickly she'd worked her magic. Everyone knows what goes down in DVD-bangs. Small private rooms, often with projector screens and the world's least comfortable futons, they're somewhere you hope to never end upâbut also can't wait to hear all the details the next morning when Rae comes to your room for a debrief.
You'd been left under the surveillance of Jungkook.
"Look after her," Rae had instructed, then narrowed her eyes. "Or I'll destroy your reputation with a single twitter thread, Tokki."
It's a threat he's taken seriously. Knows how the internet works, and even though he's never done anything worthy of a cancellation, he also doesn't intend on starting now. The fact you seem to have no idea who he is during the daylight hours intrigues him. It's a rarity on streets like these.
Even when a few people asked for pictures with him on your walk to the hangover soup place, you didn't clock it as weird. Figured they were friends passing by, wanting to document their chance run-in. Just another memory of the night. The way Jungkook had greeted them was full of warmth, and kindness. Why wouldn't you assume they were mates?
You were also still incredibly drunk at the time, so didn't think to question it. Was keen for food, and Jungkook had insisted on hangover soup, and so that's where you are. Dishes nearly empty, far more of it eaten by him than you, you're laughing about nothing and everything all at once.
"Right," Jungkook declares, deciding he cannot hold in a question that's been tickling at his brain for the entire meal. "What the fuck is that?"
Coat left in the cloakroom, long forgotten about, your tattoos are on full display for him, just like his are for you. Up your arm they trail; a patchwork of teeny tiny identifiers. Latin phrases around skulls, birth flowers of the people you hold close, butterflies and stars. There's an ode to your favourite musician and your favourite Shakespeare quote, too. The fabric of you etched into your skin. There's no reinventing yourself, even half the world away from home.
You know precisely which tattoo Jungkook is asking about. You've asked yourself the same question a few times.
"Fuck off," you laugh.
While most of your tattoos are gorgeous, there's one that was done by a rogue artist on a girlie holiday a few years ago. What was supposed to be a seashell now looks like... well, nothing really. It's just a blob, thanks to the artist being absolutely terrible. The only solace you find in it is that your two best friends have an equally awful permanent reminder of that holiday on their bodies, too.
"It doesn't look how it's supposed to," you explain with a little pout. "I got royally screwed over."
He cocks a brow. You still haven't told him what it is. He isn't gonna ask you twice.
With a grumble, you feebly admit, "A shell."
And then he's laughing. Really laughing. Laughing so hard you think he might piss himselfâwhich you'd actually prefer, because then he could be the embarrassed one, instead.
"I'm calling you Shelly from now on," he says with a broad smile. Has had his fair share of tattoo blunders, and knows you must've developed an affection towards how shitty it is. Would have gotten it covered up, otherwise. "That's incredible."
"You're calling me so such thing," you assure him, but you also can't help but laugh.
"I am," he tells you, then really solidifies it. "Shelly."
"Fuck off," you whine, doubling down. Scanning his arms, you try and pick out anything you can use against him, too. "If I'm Shelly, then you're Mike."
"Mike?!" He protests.
"Yeah," you insist, pointing towards the microphone on his forearm. "Mike."
"You are not calling me Mike. Do I look like a Mike?!"
"Do I look like a Shelly?!"
You've got a point. It's not the name he would have first associated with you - but it is cute, he thinks. Cute how mortified you seem. Cute how you can't help but smile.
After a little bit of back and forth, it's decided that neither of you look like your namesakes.
"Y'know, we kinda have matching tattoos," he says, holding out his arm for you to study. "Or at least, the placements."
And sure enough, below his elbow lives the outline of a bunny sitting on a crescent moon. Holding your own arm out next to his, below your elbow is a butterfly. Above it, is a teeny tiny moon.
Like Jungkook's moon, it's a crescent. Was supposed to symbolise new beginnings. You wonder what his means, but don't ask. Instead, you marvel at the coincidence of it all.
He presses his index finger against the butterfly on the inside of your forearm. The echoing chatter of the restaurant fades softly into nothingness as he says, "Nabi."
You nod. Even if you have spoken with him in English this entire time, it's nice to hear him speak in his mother tongue, no matter how minimal - so you reciprocate. Press your index finger against his bunny. Smile. Say, "Tokki."
It further confirms to Jungkook that you have no idea who he is. Has been a while since he's met a girl in a circumstance like this where that's the case. Likes the anonymity of it all. Is hiding his identity from you, and yet hasn't felt such vulnerability for years.
"Daltokki, right?" You continue, not wanting the silence to linger for too long. "The rabbit in the moon?"
You're not wrong, but you're also not entirely right.
"Yeah," he smiles regardless. "That's it."
JUNGKOOK'S APARTMENT ITAEWON-DONG, YONGSAN-GU SATURDAY 07:12
"Shhh," Jungkook quietly laughs.Â
His hand is over your mouth and the other is on your hip as he guides you into his apartment. With your back to his chest, you've both been giggling for the entire ride to his place.
He had insisted that he should walk you home, and was surprised by the offense you seemed to have taken by this. You then told him that he absolutely could not seduce you, and that it was very gender-role-conforming for him to think that you were incapable of getting home by yourself.
"Maybe I should be the one to make sure you get home safely," you had said with a false sense of concern, which had made him laugh quite considerably.
In all reality, you didn't mind him offering to get you home. You just hadn't tidied your room. Didn't really expect to be taking a boy back to your place, much less one that looks like him.
Together, you'd caught the early morning bus over to Itaewon instead of a taxi, 'cause you're still on a student budget and Jungkook wasn't quite ready to blow his cover just yet.
You've been teasing himâquestioning his status as a potential International Super Spyâever since he took your hand and guided you into one of the flashiest apartment complexes you've ever been in. There was security. Doormen. A passcode for the elevatorânot to mention that he was heading up to the seventh floor once you were in it. Might not sound like much, but when there are only seven floors to the entire building, it makes it the penthouse by default.
"It's not a penthouse," he'd insisted. "Plus, I live with friends. Only pay a third of the rent."
But a third of his rent is more money than you'll probably see in three months of post-grad work. You're drunk, but you're not stupid. You also know that the rental market here differs significantly from your home country. Monthly rent is cheap, but the deposits are extortionate. Sure, he'll get it back when he leaves, but to have the initial money needed for a place like this? He's not a regular student, if one at all, that much is sure.
"Not sure who's home," Jungkook whispers as you both kick your shoes off in the entryway. Given the looks of the other shoes, it's clear that this is a guys-only living situation. You're proven right when he continues, "Betcha Tae's still in that damn DVD-bang, but Yoongi might be back."
"Yoongi?" You question.
"GLOSS," Jungkook says, remembering how oblivious you are to who he is. Reaching down to grab your shoes, he isn't gonna leave them by the door. Will take them to his room. Doesn't want the boys asking questions, if they are in. Knows they'll just use it as an excuse to publicly roast him whenever they're next online together.
Given that a stream is scheduled for Sunday night, he doesn't want to tempt fate.
Their current choice of wind-up, which the viewers have been eating up, is the joke that Jungkook is a virgin. He's not, but he never knows how to defend himself without sounding like a tool, so always gets a little awkward. A lot of their viewers love it. Join in on the joke. Some take it seriously. He doesn't care.
Next month, Taehyung will do something dumb, and he'll become the favourite joke for a while. Maybe Yoongi. But for now, it's Jungkook.
None of them take it to heart. They're just a group of friends who share their gaming hangouts online, and accidentally made it to the top of the ranks.
They aren't particularly good at gaming, but that's part of the charm. Crescent Collective is how they're known: Blu-Tae, GLOSS and Tokki.
After a bet went wrong, and they all lost, they ended up with moon tattoos and their respective 'symbols'. Jungkook's is a rabbit, Tae's is a blu-ray DVD disk (because he really is committed to the bit), and Yoongi's is stars to symbolise the shine of fresh gloss. Jungkook's makes the most sense. Yoongi's is pretty decent. Taehyung's is just... Well, it's very him.
Sliding open the door into the main living area, Jungkook has to cover your mouth again when you gasp at the sheer size of the place.
"I thought butterflies were supposed to be silent?" He teases. "Quiet for me, Nabi."
His place is bigger than your family home, you think. Hushing you again, he's laughingâand then he's cursing at the sight of a half-naked Yoongi by the kitchen counter.
In his boxers, with half a clementine slice hanging from his lips, he's just as shocked to see Jungkook with you. Gets over it pretty quickly.
"Don't mind me," he says, chewing down on the fruit with a smirk. Looks towards you. "Apologies for the lack of clothes."
With your shoes hooked on his fingers, Jungkook's other large hand is still over your mouth. You're not sure you can form any words as it is, but you do notice the crescent moon and stars on Yoongi's ribs.
"Not a word to Tae," is all Jungkook says. Knows that he'll be in for a world of teasing tomorrow if he gets wind of it. "I mean it."
Holding his hands up, Yoongi's still smirking, but he is backing away into a room just off the kitchen. "My lips are sealed."
Watching as he closes the door, you wonder how much truth is in his words. Jungkook knows it's absolute bullshit. Chooses not to dwell on it. Loosens his grip on you and heads towards his own room. Turns back to check you're following him, and can't help but smile when he knows that you are.
Tossing your shoes just inside the door, Jungkook is quick to pick up a pair of jeans he'd left on the floor, before chucking them over his desk chair. He tweaks his bedding. Straightens it out. Looks a little shy as he turns to face you.
"Made it home safe," he says quietly, as you close the door behind you.
You nod. Keep a little distance. Say, "It's dangerous to sleep after drinking. Make sure you build a tower of pillows in the middle of your bed so you don't roll onto your back."
Both of you are far more sober than you were earlier. There's no need to worry about anything like that.
And yet he nods, now. Says, "You're probably right. You can always stay, though. Just to check I don't die in my sleep, or whatever."
"It'd be the responsible thing to do," you nod, wondering if he can tell just how fast your heart is beating. "But I don't have any pyjamas."
Jungkook swallows. The way he looks at you now is entirely different to how he'd looked at you in the club. Back then, he'd been bold. Flirtatious.
Now, he seems vulnerable. Needy.
"I sleep in my underwear," he tells you, unsure if you'll actually be sleeping. While he likes the idea of fucking you, part of him doesn't want to. Fears it'll ruin the magic of the unknown. The way he throbs at the mere thought of it would suggest that his hopes outweigh his fears. "I don't mind, if you don't."
The clothes Jungkook's wearing are baggy. You've seen nothing of his figure.
Reaching for the nape of his neck, he tugs on the fabric of his T-shirt. Pulls it over his head and discards it in one swift movement. The sound of it crumpling on the floor is abrasive in how it makes you feel. Raw. Unrefined. You suppose it's just a natural consequence of seeing the toned muscles of his chest. How his waist defies what you thought was possible for masculine builds, and how broad his chest is. The indent of his collarbones, and the lines of his pelvis that draw your eyes downwards.
A pair of Calvins peek just above the waistband of his jeans, and a silver chain rests around his neck. Light from the city filters in, and LED lights around his impressive computer set-up paint him in a hue of violet.
"No," you manage to reply, which is a miracle, you think. "I don't mind."
And then you reciprocate. Reach for the hem of your shirt and pull it over your head, letting the fabric fall to the floor. Seeing him swallow back his nerves, or maybe his desires, makes you feel far bolder than you should.
"It's really uncomfortable to sleep in jeans," you tell him.
He nods. Agrees. Threads the button of his trousers through its loop. Doesn't take them off yet. Waits for you to do the same. Keeps his eyes firmly locked on yours. Doesn't let his gaze wander, no matter how much he has to fight all his instincts not to fully take you in. Is still pretending like he doesn't want you in the most indecent of ways.
The room you're in right now is known worldwide.Â
People set it as their zoom backgrounds. It's on Pinterest. There are YouTube videos attempting to recreate the set-up. If he were to power up his computerâwhich, in all fairness, is only on standbyâand go live, there'd be a thousand viewers within minutes. Doesn't matter what he plays, or who he's with. He doesn't give it much thought anymore. Is just life.
Sometimes, he regrets not being a faceless streamer, but he also knows that it's part of the appeal. Connection, and the fantasy that comes with this almost dystopian, parasocial idea of it.
After all, the meeting of his eyes with yours across a busy club led you to this point. Human connection in the simplest of ways, that he thinks could culminate in the most complex of ways, too.
"Okay," he says. "So take them off."
"You want me to?" You ask just to tease a little bit, and when a smile flickers onto his seemingly nervous lips, you're glad you did.
"You think we'd be here right now if I didn't?" He says with a tweak of his brows.
"You've got a point."
With that, you push your jeans down and reveal the matching set of black underwear you're in. It's nothing special. In fact, it's not really a set, but it's close enough that it'd fool anyone who didn't know.
Jungkook, in this moment, is indeed a beautiful fool.
There's a lopsided grin on his face as he lets his eyes rake down your body. Is shameless as he indulges in you. Nods, as he bites down on his bottom lip.
"It's cold," you tell him, urging him along a little bit.
"Shit," he says without much thought. "Sorry. Was just... Yeah. Shit."
It's both endearing and wholly confusing how Jungkook flips from confident to cute. A man of duality. It makes you giggle, and then you're the one biting down on your bottom lip. Are both a little bashful. A little shy.
"I'm only here to make sure you don't die in your sleep," you remind him before it goes any further.
Looking at him now, knowing you want him in the worst of ways, it's testing all of your willpower not to just cut to the chase.
Thing is, you liked his company tonight. Want it again. Want to give him a reason to seek you out once more. Want him thinking about you in clubs, and looking for you in crowded bars. Pining. Yearning. Needy.
"It's already gone seven," he tells you, walking towards his bed. Knocks his head to the side. Silently tells you to follow suit. "Will probably only get a couple hours in."
"Better than nothing. Plus, you're actually really irritating," you bullshit as you get into bed with him. Are adamant you won't fuck him, but you do let him pull you in closer.
"Oh, yeah?" He grins.
"Mhmm," you nod, pretending as if you aren't looking at his lips. "You'll be less annoying when you're asleep."
"I'm never gonna sleep again," he assures you. "Will annoy you forever."
"I know where the front door is," you say as you stroke a few of his loose, wavy hairs back behind his ears. They fall freely almost right away, but it just gives you another excuse to play with it "I can just leave. I'm only here to make sure you don't die in your sleep. Pointless if you're awake."
"So I have to be asleep for you to stay?"
"Mhmm," you hum.
He immediately loosens his grip on you and flops into an overdramatic sleeping position. Fake snores. Gets you giggling. Can't hide his smile, either. Laughs through the god-awful noises he's making.
But it is late, and you're both tired. As much as he'd like to stay awake with you, the pull of sleep is just too tempting now that you're beneath his sheets. It's not like he doesn't wanna fuck you. His semi is very much present, but neither of you mention it.
"Y'know what's sad about butterflies?" Jungkook mumbles after the laughter dies down. He carefully begins to trace the lines of your tattoo, eyes entirely focused on the tip of his finger.
You purr a response before you fully vocalise one. "Tell me."
He glances up at you only very momentarily. Looks back down. Is quiet when he says, "How quickly they die. Spend over half their lifespan growing into these beautiful creatures, and then they have, whatâA week? Two? Three, topsâand then they're gone. It's like the cherry blossoms in spring. Beautiful, and thenâ" He clicks his fingers. "âgone."
Stroking back some loose strands of his hair, you wonder if he's thinking about you. About this chance encounter. Beautiful, then gone.
"Just means you have to appreciate them while they're still around," you say softly. "Cherish them, because you know you only have them for a moment."
His gaze lifts to meet yours. The reflection of his LED lights makes it seem like butterflies are floating around in his deep, dark eyes, too.
There are stories he could tell you of ancient folklore; about human souls taking the form of butterflies. Of justice, and peace, and spirits. Of back in time, when tigers still smoked. He could tell you of his favourite butterflies. Of the black butterflies that are as large as his hands in the summer. Of the huge display in a museum downtown that would transfix him as a child.
Instead, he gently presses his lips against the lines of your butterfly tattoo.
The rate at which your heart is beating multiplies. Like a swarm of butterflies chasing through your veins, you've no control over the way you're feeling. He's brought your artwork to life; set the souls inside of your butterfly free, only for it to be apparent that the souls belonged to the both of you, anyway.
You know that this is one of those moments; a butterfly passing on by through your lives. Here, and then gone. Beautiful, but fleeting.
There's a shyness to Jungkook now, as he rolls onto his back. A reluctance to get things wrong. He doesn't look at you, just nibbles on his bottom lip and pretends as if the empty white ceiling ahead of him is the most interesting thing he's seen all night.
It's not.
You are.
You, and those eyes that make him feel like the butterfly on your arm is tickling at his tummy. He finds himself jealous when he faces you again and begins tracing the thin lines of your butterfly once more. Wants to embed himself into you like the ink that's carved out a home in your skin.
"Sorry," he mumbles, seemingly regretful of the tender kiss he'd pressed against your arm just a short moment ago. "Don't know why I did that."
"It's okay," you reply without much thought. Like him, you're letting the way you feel dictate the words you say. Care not for playing coy. "I liked it."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Jungkook wants to stop his mouth from letting his desires escape. The issue is, he drank a little too much tonight and his lips are a little too loose. Too bad. Can't help himself from asking, "Can I do it again?"
You're just as bad.
"Yeah," you whisper. "Please."
The way his lashes splay against his cheeks as he presses another kiss to your arm is nothing short of celestial. Like that damn moon on his arm, he's got a beauty about him that's hard to capture in words. Ethereal feels too fantastical, but gorgeous feels too dense. He resides in a realm somewhere between the two. Somewhere you'd like to stay forever.
Forever, sadly, only lasts a few hours. You've brunch plans with new friends you can't bail on yet for fear of running a friendship before it's even begun.
You see yourself out. Jungkook's still asleep. Not quite 10AM, you've a dozen missed calls from Rae, and a cold can of coke waiting for you in your fridge. Funnily enough, though, you don't really feel hungover. Must have gotten it all out of your system the night before.
It's only fitting, when you think about Jungkook on the subway home, and how soberingly drunk the idea of him makes you feel.Â
YONSEI UNIVERSITY DORMS DAESIN-DONG, SEODAEMUN-GU SUNDAY 21:39
Brunch had, predictably, been a yawn-fest.
The people were perfectly nice, but you spent the entire time thinking about Jungkook; how you'd left him in a pretty slumber, the LEDs behind his computer still glowing, with not even so much as a note to say thank you.
It's not like he had any paper on his desk, and you weren't about to start rummaging around his room. You also didn't want to wake him. Part of it was because you knew you'd be saying goodbye, and the concept of that was one that you didn't like all that much.
And so your subway ride back to your dorm had been spent searching his name. He didn't take long to find.Â
From the club's Instagram, you found GLOSS and quickly discovered that there was far more to both him and Blu-Tae than just being DJs. Their follower counts were wild. Numbers you know you'll never see on your own account. Verification check marks accented their display names.Â
Who are you? You'd thought to yourself, incredibly perplexed by it all.
Jungkook was littered all over their pages, and yet it still took a while for you to click through to his account. You're not sure why, but think that perhaps the unknown was a nice place to reside within. Safer.Â
CR3SC3NT_T0KK1 was his usernameâand curiously, Tokki was also his display name. Brows furrowed, you'd almost dropped your phone when you saw his follower count. It eclipsed both of his friends.Â
Filled with gaming set-ups, merch drops, and general life dumps, it was pretty clear that whoever Jungkook had made himself out to be the night before was not who he was in real life.Â
Equal parts offended and intrigued, you were only more confused when you saw that Rae was already following himâbut not following Taehyung.
"What?" she'd beamed when you'd asked her about it after you'd arrived home from brunch, a scoop of hangover ice cream being waved around in the air with her flamboyant gestures. "He's, like, one of the biggest streamers in the countryâand if I want to keep Tae obsessed with me, we need as many connections as possible. Jungkook's a frog to me, baby, not a prince. Don't you worry your little cotton socks. I'm not after him."
"I wouldn't care if you were," you'd blatantly lied in response, and then you'd giggled together at how ridiculous you were both being over boys you didn't really know.
Hovering over the bright purple 'JOIN STREAM' button later that evening, part of you holds back. Think it'd be weird. Strange. That he'd somehow know it was you.
Dipping your mouse, you tick the checkbox to join as an anonymous viewer. Take a breath. Think fuck it. Watch with bated breath as the loading wheel turnsâand then he's there.
Jeon Jungkook has the kind of beauty that transcends shitty quality streams. Smiling as he jokes with one of his friends through a headset with a pair of black bunny ears affixed to the top of them, you hear a voice you almost recognise. Notice the friend he's streaming with in the top corner. Realise you do know him, too.
Hair as blue as the trees are green, Tae has just as much boyish charm as Jungkook, but also an incredibly large hickey that seems to match the ones on Rae's neck.
"Nah, can we get an L in the chat for Kook," he's teasing. Sure enough, the chat begins to explode with the letter, and Jungkook looks so pretty when he protests.
"It's not an L!"
"It is!" Tae insists. "Should have seen him, guys. Was following this girl around like a lovesick puppyâ"
"No, I wasn't!"
"And she didn't even give him her number. Not even her name!"
"That's not true!" Jungkook whines. He switches between Korean and English with ease, sometimes just single words, other times whole sentences. "I have a name."
"What is it?"
"Not telling you."
"Cause you don't have one!"
"No, because you'll all make my life a living hell," Jungkook laughsâand then notices a bright blue comment lighting up in the chat. His eyes widen. "Fuck."
GLOSS: Was calling her Nabi when he got home last night Almost shit his pants when he saw me
"Yoongi, I'm gonna shave your eyebrows off in your sleep," Jungkook growlsâonly for the chat to start spamming butterfly emojis. Closing his eyes, he leans back in his chair, the still paused video game long forgotten about, now. Thousands of people are in their chat, and even more are watching the stream.
"Guys, get it trending," Taehyung goads. "Tweet, I dunno, bunny and butterfly emojis."
"Don't do that!"
"Hashtag find Jungkook's butterfly."
"Do NOT do that!"
"I'm like a modern-day cupid," Taehyung beams.
"I'm shaving your eyebrows, too."
Closing the stream, you sit for a moment, mouth ajar, unable to process what on earth you've just witnessed. Part of you feels as if it must have an incredibly vivid daydream; a projection of your heart's desire.
And you know you shouldn't, but when you get home from running errands the following day, you join the stream again. Blush when you notice the chat is still teasing Jungkook.
"I'm gonna block you all," he threatens them with a grin, which only encourages them to send even more butterfly emojis.
The next day is no different, nor the day after that.
He is, though. Has been letting it all play on his mind. Doesn't have much of a filter when it comes to streaming.
"What if she didn't even like me, guys," he whines to the chat. "And sees this and is like... mortified. I think I'd punch myself in the face if she ever saw any of this."
You toy with the idea of sending a comment into the chat. Something that only he'd realise was you. Thing is, you feel bad for intruding. As if you shouldn't be prying. As if you're eavesdropping on him chatting with friends, and not on the stream he's broadcasting live around the world.
Typing out a message, you deliberate your choice.
Punch urself in the face pls, tokki x the message reads.Â
Simple. Effective. To the point.
But everyone calls him that, you stupidly realise, now.
And so you change the name to 'Mike'.Â
Before you can even really realise what you've done, you've pressed send.
The message flitters into the chat feed. He's about to resume his game. Doesn't notice it at first.
Gives the chat one final glance, and then his eyes widen. He sits up taller. Straighter. "Mike?"
You close the lid of your laptop immediately.
"Fuck."
THE STREETS WAUSAN-RO, HONGDAE FRIDAY 23:51
"Tae is on in five," Rae squeals, dragging you down the road at lightning speed.Â
You'd spent far too long at dinner, and also had far too much to drink with your food, so have been forced to make an undignified sprint to the club in an attempt to make it in before the place reaches capacity.
There's already a queue. You can see it from a mile away.
Realistically, Rae could have gotten Taehyung to add her to the guest list. He'd offered. She didn't wanna look needy, so had played it coy about her plans for the evening.Â
After a single beer and soju, she'd decided that the idea of him hooking up with anyone but her simply wouldn't do.
"Shit," she sighs in defeat, looking at the queue. The direction you've come from means that you reach the entrance before you reach the queue, but even then, you can tell it goes around the block. "Are there no other clubs these people can go to?!"
There areâbut this club is rammed tonight for the same reason Club Sundown was rammed the week before. People want to see the Crescent Collective.Â
You didn't realise it at the time, but you'd bypassed the queue of the second club last weekend because Jungkook had been with you.
And as if by a stroke of luck, or perhaps a twist of fate, the same tattooed hand that had held you as you slept last weekend is now putting out a cigarette just a few steps away.
Eyes landing on yours, he looks away again, almost immediately. Feels embarrassed. Stupid. For the way you left him, and also for the way he knows you must know who he is, now.
Behind a red rope, he's away from the general crowd. It's sort of obnoxious, you thinkâbut also know Jungkook is anything but.
"They're with me," Jungkook says to the bouncer, not really looking at you, but nodding in your general direction. Is deliberately keeping a little distance. Instead, he says to Rae, "Tae wouldn't want you waiting in line."
Nodding, the security guard makes way for you, stamping the backs of your hands with UV-activated ink as you walk past.
"Thank you!" Rae beams.
"No worries," Jungkook smiles right back. "He's about to start. Was just getting air. You're lucky you arrived when you did."
"Angel," she praises. "I'll get you a drink while we're in there."
You know her well enough now to know that she absolutely will not, but you don't say anything. Instead, you fold your arms over your chest as you walk, suddenly feeling all awkward in Jungkook's presence.
"Nabi," he curtly greets you as you head down the stairs.
"Tokki," you greet him back just as formally. Consider calling him 'Mike' instead, but you chicken out.
Face scrunching up, Jungkook tries his best not to cringe at himself. Doesn't know if you're addressing him by his tattoo moniker, or just calling him Tokki because you know it's his identifier online.
"How have you been?" He asks, not wanting to let it simmer.
"Alright," you say, aware of how awkward this all feels, as you descend the stairs and into the club. The music is getting louder, and soon you won't be able to hear him talk unless you're in each other's ears. "And you?"
"Alright."
Just as quickly as he appeared, Jungkook is lost to the crowd.Â
He doesn't care to stick around if he's just going to be hung out to dry by you again. He tells himself that he only made sure you got in to keep Rae happy for Taehyung's sakeâyet as he rejoins his friends in their booth, he finds himself desperately seeking you out again.
It takes him a while, but he eventually spots you by the bar in conversation with Rae. He can't make out what you're saying, but notices how your eyes are flickering around the room. Seems as if you're hunting for something.Â
Deep down, even if he pretends like he doesn't, he hopes it's for him.
Pulled away from your search by the bartender passing over drinks to the pair of you, Jungkook feels bad. Knows the drinks are pricey in this place. Also knows, from the conversations you've already had, that you're on a tight budget. Had said that once the semester starts, you'll stop going to parties. Are seemingly unaware of the fact the parties never stop in this city. You'll learn.
When your eyes finally land on his a little while later, you're surprised by his intense gazeâintrigued by his lack of shame for being caught out. He doesn't look away or appear embarrassed. If anything, it's quite the opposite.
Girls are vying for his attention all around him, yet you receive all of it. Half the room away, hundreds of people create a sea between you both. Jungkook thinks he'd swim through it, no matter how choppy the water, if it meant he could have you right now.
You're the one who left, though.Â
It's up to you to come back.
Part of you doesn't want to, but then you see another girl making advances, and Rae's horror over other girls trying it on with Taehyung seems to have rubbed off on you. The idea of it makes your skin crawl. You're drunk, and a little reactive, but Jungkook likes playing with fire.
As you work your way through the crowd towards him, he tries his best not to grin. Finds himself vindicated in his desire to be close to you, 'cause it seems like you want it, too.
Sliding in between Jungkook and the girl, you turn and apologise.
"Just need to borrow him for a second," you smile, clutching at his shirt and pulling him away from the booth before she even has a chance to protest.
With an ever-so-satisfied smirk, Jungkook shrugs towards the other girl, and lets you drag him wherever you want. He's putty in your hands, a little tipsy and desperately in need of attention from you.Â
For the past week, he's played scenario over scenario over scenario in his head about this moment, and now that it's happening, he's glad he let you seek him out. Is so pleased that you actively want him just as much as he wants you.
In the middle of the crowd, you're hidden from prying eyes. It's too dark to notice any discerning features of the people around you, yet somehow, Jungkook seems like a vibrant golden light to you. Impossible to miss. Unable to ignore.
You wanna talk. Ask him about who the fuck he is. Explain that you didn't mean to leave so heartlessly.
Taehyung's set is so overwhelmingly loud, though. Can barely even hear yourself think.
As soon as he'd spotted Rae in the crowd, Taehyung had sent the bar coordinator to go and get her. She's sitting pretty up in the DJ booth, incredibly pleased with herself. Notices you and Jungkook almost immediately. Knows it'll be on Twitter in the next few hours, especially if that damn butterfly tattoo of yours is noticed.
Bunnies and butterflies have been trending for days.
Jungkook speaks, but you can't hear him.
"Huh?" You ask, getting on your tippy toes, but it's fruitless. Even as his hand drops to your waist to steady you and keep you in place, you can barely make out his words. "I can't hear you!"
He can't hear jack shit, either. Frowns. Looks around. Spots Yoongi by the booth and gestures towards the side of the room. When Yoongi nods back, it's Jungkook who drags you through the crowd, now. Just beyond the DJ booth is a little black door that Yoongi meets you by. Taps in the code. Nods in your direction.
"A pleasure," he says with a knowing smirk. Miraculously, you can hear him, but ultimately, it's because you're not in the direct line of the speakers now.
You don't get a chance to respond before Jungkook gets you into what can only described as a dark hole as quickly as he can. Romance, you think to yourself, but you also are very aware of the fact Jungkook doesn't let go of your hand, even when he's searching for the light switch. It takes him a second, but he manages to recall the approximate location quickly enough.
Dingy yellow light floods into the room. Small and boxy, it's a 3-in-1 storage room, bathroom, and dressing room for 'talent'. It's why Yoongi had the code, but you can't imagine anyone with any shred of self-respect actually using this place. The walls are the same grey tiles as the floor, and the light bulb hangs from a wire without a shade. The tap on the sink drips, and you're pretty sure there's a leak in the far corner by the mirror.
None of that matters, though. All you can focus on is the man in front of you. Though not soundproof, the room does offer a far more muted version of Taehyung's set. More importantly, it provides you with privacy.
It's been a week since you last saw him, face to face.
Though you have, admittedly, seen him what feels like a million times on low-quality streams from his bedroom.
Realistically, it's been about three times, but you think about it almost constantly.
"You left," is all he says, a little pout on his lips.
It's cute, you think, that he is so outwardly offended by such an act. You would have thought that a man of his position would have a habit of leaving, himself. Then again, you didn't know of his status when you left him in bed that morning.
"And you didn't die," you reply with a teasing smile, trying not to make it sound so severe. "You were fine without me."
"I'm not joking," he says, even if he can't help but smile at the recollection of how stupid the conversation before bed had been. "You left. It was��rude."
"I had brunch plans," you tell him, reaching your hands out for his. He wants to resist. Fails. Lets you pull him closer. Incredibly close, in fact. So close that you begin to notice all sorts of things. His freckles. A small scar on his cheek. A tiny fleck of glitter on his skin, no doubt from one of the girls who had been desperate for his attention earlier. "You'd only had a few hours sleep. I didn't want to disturb you."
"Could have left a note," he says, still pouty but far quieter. You can smell the Jack on his breath. Have always hated the taste, but think you could grow to like it. "Your number. Something, at least."
"I could've," you admit, edging even closer. Closing the gap. Nudging your nose against his. But then you smile. Pull back. Tease, "And you could have warned me that I'd become a trending topic on Twitter."
Just like that, Jungkook's pout snaps into the prettiest smile. His face scrunches up, lines creasing on his nose. Beneath his closed eyes reside the sweetest little puffs. He's got the kind of face that is impossible not to like.
"Ah," he cringes.
"Yeah," you laugh at the stupidity of it all. What did he expect? That you wouldn't find out? "Ah."
"In my defence," he holds his hands up, eyes wide and innocent. "You called me Tokki. How was I to know you didn't know?"
"Oh, give over," you laugh, as he reaches for your hands once again. Pulls you closer. "You know I didn't know."
Truthfully, he does know this, but it was nice to be unknown for a little while. Nice to not second guess your intentions. Even now, knowing that you know, he feels like none of it matters.Â
"Look," he begins, toying with the hem of your cropped shirt. Lets his fingertips graze your bare skin. Tries his best not to think about what you look like half-naked. Fails. "I only came out tonight 'cause I hoped I'd see you. I don't care about staying out till ass-o'clock, again."
"Think I've only just caught up on sleep," you hum, angling your chin up and giving him the perfect opportunity to make a move that goes beyond flirtatious touches.
"Exactly," he smiles, letting his hand squeeze the side of your waist. Pulls you closer. "And I've not drunk half as much tonight, but I think I could do with you making sure I don't die, again."
"Yeah?"
Nodding as he nudges his nose against yours, Jungkook is all smiles. Lets his lips line up against your pout.
"Yeah," he mumblesâthen lets the word get lost in your lips.
Sinking into what it feels like to kiss you, Jungkook can't help but feel satisfaction. Has finally caught the damn butterfly he's been after all week.Â
He's played a lot of games. Won a lot of battles.
And yet victory has never tasted so sweet.
JUNGKOOK'S APARTMENT ITAEWON-DONG, YONGSAN-GU SATURDAY 02:07
You retrace your steps. Get a taxi to his place, 'cause there's no point pretending like he can't afford it. Not anymore.
You're not giggling like you were the first time you were in his elevator, but it's kind of impossible to do so when your back is to the wall and Jungkook's tongue is in your mouth.
Your hands roam his bodyâwaist, ass. If you can squeeze it, you will. Just makes him deepen the kisses. If his large hands weren't cupping your jaw, keeping you close, they'd be doing the exact same thing as yours.
The ding of the elevator pulls you apart just for a second, and then you're the one pulling him down to the corridor to his place.
He doesn't open the door. Just kisses you again.Â
Finally understands what it means to get butterflies, 'cause he's got you, now, and he never wants to lose it.
Hooking his hands beneath your ass, he hoists you up. Gets your legs wrapped around him. Could go in, but where's the fun in that? There's a slight danger of getting caught. He knows the hallway security cameras will definitely pick this up. The threat that it could get leaked online, and the simple fact that he couldn't give a shit if it does, is kind of hot.
"I'm not fucking you out here," you tell him through a hushed giggle, when he rests his forehead against yours.
"Woah," he jokes. "Who said anything about fucking?"
"I can literally feel your boner, Jungkook."
"TouchĂŠ."
He doesn't even attempt to downplay it. He puts you down. Gets you through the threshold of his apartment. Shoes off by the door, there's no need to be quiet. Yoongi and Taehyung are still out, and will be for hours. He could take his time if he really wanted.
But what he wants is you. Doesn't waste time. Gets you in his room. Kinda feels like you never left. Jungkook still wishes you hadn't, but doesn't mind the idea of you making it up to him now.
"So," you hum, trailing your fingertips across his desk. "This is where the magic happens?"
He smiles a little bashfully, head dropping for a moment before his eyes are on yours again. "Yeah. You could say that."
Now that you're back in his space, it's a little embarrassing just how many clues there were. A headset rests on the deskâblack, robust, with his signature bunny ears secured on topâand a mic is hooked up by the monitor. The webcam doesn't look special, but the keyboard subtly glows in his darkened room. Violet, like the LEDs behind his screen.
A laptop covered in vinyl stickers is closed next to the set-up. He uses it when he's not streaming on his desktop. At least three of the stickers are of the Crescent Collective's logo.
Turning to fully face him, you rest your palms behind yourself and perch on the edge of the desk.
He gets a little kick out of seeing you so flippantly disregard the domain in which he dominates. Gives him a point to prove. Gets him closing the space between you, hands on your waist, dipping to your ass to leverage further back on his desk. Knows it's sturdy, 'cause he built it himself, but has never tested out quite how strong it really is. Thinks now's as good a time as any to find out.
Your legs wrap around his body with no thought, just the innate understanding that you want him in a way you're sure thousands of people have only dreamt of: in his room, on his desk, that damn 'Go Live' button just a few short clicks away.
Reaching beside you, there's a smirk on your lips as you retrieve his headset. Put it on him. Say, "The ears are cute, Tokki."
He rolls his eyes. Is fighting a smile, and currently losing. He's seen some lewd shit during his time on the internet and is well aware of the fanart that includes the ears and little else. Always found it kinda funny, before.
Now? He's so hard it almost hurts, and he thinks he could grow to like it.
As your arms drape over his shoulders, he takes them off. Puts them on you, instead. Adjusts the sizing. Gets them just right for you. Is attentive, like that. Pulls his head back a little, and then realises what a problem you're gonna be for him.
It's not so much the addition of animal ears that's getting him insatiable, but seeing you adorned with a crown that is so inherently his that does it.
Jungkook's no saint. He's had his fair share of one-nighters. A couple hours of fun never to be spoken of again. Since the group of them signed to their management agency, they've been repeatedly told how important it is to get NDA's signed. Something about it always feels so icky to Jungkook. Cruel, almost. Has only had a couple hook-ups since then, both with flings he's known for a good couple of years, with no fear of them spilling the beans on how prettily he whines when he cums.
You're the first new girl in a long time. He knows he should really pause things before you cut to the chaseâbut then your hand is trailing down his thick forearm, delicately stroking his rabbit moon with a curious smile. Decides he doesn't care.
"The ears are cute," he replies. Teasingly adds, "Nabi."
The position of your arms over his shoulders ensures the tattoos he'd traced the week before are fully displayed for him. As his eyes drop to your butterfly, you're curiously smitten by the way his lips move to press a kiss against it again.
"Suit me?"
"Mhmm," he hums, eyes flickering back up to yours. "Should also get you a pair of butterfly wings, or something."
"I'd make you wear them," you tell him with a cheeky glint in your eye. "Turn you into a butterfly, yourself. Your girlies in the chat would love that."
Jungkook knows without a shadow of a doubt he'd let you. Not for the girlies in the chat, but for you.
Ghosting his lips against yours, he's waiting for you to press down. Is letting you take the lead.
Your kisses are sweet. Tepid. Reserved.
You're feeling; his hands on your waist, the pressure of his lip rings, the presence of his nose.
And then he's feeling; your bare skin as his large hands slip beneath the fabric of your shirt, the way your legs wrap around him, the vibration of a small groan against his lips.
The skirt you're in is bunched around your hips, and the positioning is just right for you to feel how hard he is against your underwear. It's a little undignified, you'll admit, but you're impatient, so you take control. Reposition his hand between your legs. Encourage him to take things further.
"Yeah?" He checks.
Nodding into a needy kiss, you mumble, "Please."
It might've been a while, but Jungkook's muscle memory is enviable. He's the best player on the team for that very reason.
As he hooks your underwear to the side, he's pleased to be greeted with indications of your arousal. Smirks into the kisses he's giving you, as his fingertips graze against your clit. Trails his lips to your neck. Wants to hear the way you gasp as he pushes his thick middle finger inside you.
"Fuck," you sigh at the welcome intrusion. Nod, as he curls his finger almost immediately. He's got a lot to thank those damn video games for, that's for sure.
Softly moaning, just how he hoped you would, there's an arch to your back as he picks up a pace. The need to perform, almost.
Head tipping back as Jungkook fucks another finger into you, you're unable to think too cognitively. Can only think about the way he feels. The smell of his hair as he presses kisses against your neck, and how prominent his collarbones are as your nails trail up his toned torso.
"Feels so good," you tell him. Move the hand of yours that's been resting on his shoulder to his hair. Tug on it a little. Elicit the prettiest of whines from him.
There's something to be said for making a manâespecially one of such strength, stature, statusâso weak. Gets you all giggly. Jungkook can feel the satisfaction ripple through your entire body, and it just makes him groan against your neck even more.
"You're so wet," he praises, pulling back to study your face as he plays with you. Lets his thumb stroke up against your clit ever so gently. Revels in the way you get a little shaky. Twitchy. With those damn bunny ears, you really are like a little rabbit. Jungkook finally understands why the fan artists choose to draw him in such a way. It is hot. "You're making me so fuckin' hard."
And then you're giggling again.
"Is it a joke to you, huh?" He smirks. Looks down at your pussy, all swollen and sopping wet for him, in the hazy violet light of his room. Knows that his throbbing cock is gonna stuff you so fuckin' full that laughing won't be an option. Is desperate for it. "How badly I want you is just a big joke to you, huh, bunny?"
The way he groups you in with his moniker is too damn hot.
"Dunno," you rasp, desperately trying to hold off the orgasm that's building inside you. "Fuck me and find out."
Reaching for the button of his trousers, you're quick as you wrestle his jeans down over his ass. Don't bother pushing them down entirely. Just enough to get his boxers exposed, and in turn, his thick cock. Hard and engorged, his desperation for you is evident. A small patch of precum seeps through the fabric of his boxers. He curses as your thumb strokes against it.
"Condom?" You ask, knowing you've got none on you.
"Hold that thought," he says, regretfully pulling away from you.
Watching on as he pushes down his jeans, and strips himself of his shirt, you're at a loss for words. You've seen him like this before, but it's so much hotter knowing that he's gonna be fucking himself into you as soon as he possibly can.
Jungkook could very easily lead you to his bed. Get you comfy. Reach to his bedside cabinet for a condom. Fuck you how he likesâdoggy-style, minimal face-to-face contactâand be done with it all very quickly.
Instead, he says, "Stay here."
Doing as you're told, you watch on as he walks to the cabinet, and retrieves a condom. Admire his back, and his broad shoulders. The valley of his spine, and the hard work he's put into crafting his physique. Smirk to yourself as he dips into his boxers. Strokes himself. Once, twice. Tears the packet open with his teeth, just like you were always taught not to do, and rolls the latex down his thick shaft.
"What?" he smirks as he walks back, realising your eyes are transfixed on his cock.
You say nothing. Smile. Hold your hands out for Jungkook to take, just so you can pull him back even quicker.
Lips pressing into yours as he closes the gap, Jungkook is all smiles. Rubs the head of his cock against your pussy, gathering up your arousal all over his tip. Lines himself up with your entrance. Waits for you to give him the go-ahead.
Hand on his ass, you pull him closer. Edge the crown of his cock into you. Whimper. Beg. "Please."
Sinking into you with a laboured grunt, he's surprised with how much tighter you are around his cock than you were with his fingers. Wet and warm, there's an undeniable pleasure that sparks through his body as he gets familiar with the way you feel.
Slowly, his hips begin to pick up a pace. As his tongue strokes into your mouth, there's no dignity to the way he's taking you. The increased pace means heightened moans, and it's not just youâit's him, too.
"Shit, yeah," he grits. "So fuckin' tight, aren't you?"
Whining, you nod into his kisses. Are at his entire disposal as he grips your waist, proving exactly why Tokki is the perfect nickname for him.
As much as he likes the ears, he's a little worried that he might fuck you so hard they fall off. Doesn't wanna break them, and definitely doesn't wanna think about the story the boys would make up when they go live tomorrow to tease himâbut also really wants to fuck you harder.
Which is funny, cause the way he tugs them off with such desperation and tosses them down, you'd be forgiven for thinking he couldn't care less about breaking them. Doesn't give you a chance to say anything, 'cause his big hands are cradling your face, bringing you in for desperate kisses once more.
There's a lewdness to the sounds you make together, but Jungkook knows that if he was an entirely different kind of streamer, you'd make bank together. Wonders about the way it would look on camera. Worries. Pauses.
"You good?" You check a little breathlessly as he reaches behind you, just to tug the wire to his webcam from the plus.
"Yeah," he nods, still fiddling around behind you. Smiles in the hedonistic haze as your lips find a new home on his neck. Strokes your hair gently, and presses a kiss to the side of your head. Quietly says, "Just making sure there's no way in hell I accidentally start streaming."
You hum, all purry and pliant. "People would pay good money to see it."
While he agrees, and has had the same thought process, he doesn't care. "You saying I should be charging you for this?"
"Oh, no," you say all very sweetly. "You should be paying me."
"I'll pay you with orgasms," he promises, knowing that it's a rare currency for one-night strands.
You smirk. Pat the top of his head. "Sure you will."
If there's one thing Jungkook loves, it's a challenge.
Pulling back, he turns you around. Gets you bent over his desk with zero opposition from you. Rubs himself against your soaked cunt, then asks, "Yeah?"
"Yeah," you smirk, and then settle into a sigh as he pushes into you. The feeling of fullness from Jungkook is one that's hard to compare. So thick, and fat, and heavy, his cock really is just as impressive as he is.
With one hand hooked at the crease of your thigh, the other holds the top of your shoulder. Gets you pushed down onto his cock as far as you possibly can be. There's a slight reflection in his streaming plaque beside the monitor, and you're pleased to see just how intensely focused he is on you, brows furrowed, pretty pink lips resting ajar. The silver of his lip rings and chain catch in the light, and you find you can't look at him for too long. He's too hot.
But then he's reaching down for your clit as he fucks into you. Has your legs shaking. The waves of a familiar sensation begin to lap against the shores of your pleasure.
"Fuck," you whine. "Feels good. Keep it like that."
Jungkook knows better than to ignore your requests. Does as he's told, the pressure of his fingers on your clit only deepening. Rubbing calculated circles against you, he knows just how to work you up. Gets you whining. Mewling. Moaning.
"Gonna cum, aren't you?" he smirks, as his own high builds.
"Fuckâ"
"C'mon," he husks, feeling your walls tighten around him. He doesn't stop his relentless chase. Will win your orgasms fair and square. Continues pounding into you. Pace fast, strokes deep, he's everything you could ever want and moreâand then he's slowing. Keeping you plugged, nice and deep, but focusing on the way he's toying with your clit. "You know you wanna cream for me. All over my cock, pretty Nabi. C'monâ"
"I'm close," you all but whimper. "Soâfuck. So close."
"Yeah, you are," he tells youâand then your legs are shaking, pussy tightly clamping around his cock, one hand tense against his desk while the other grabs at his wrist. Uncontrollable, is the way you whine for him. It's so needyâso desperate and patheticâthat it's almost a sob. Jungkook doesn't ease up. In fact, his hips gain a little pace again as your orgasm shatters around you both. He's breathless, but manages to choke out, "Flithy fuckin' cunt. Feels so fuckin' good. Fuck."
The frail limpness of your body as the orgasm smokes away is cute. Jungkook loves it. You're so weak for him. He fucks into you still, chasing his own high, and your whines only get louder. It's overwhelming, but you never want to lose the feeling.
It doesn't take much. Just a minute or so of your tight cunt, and Jungkook is pulling out. Even though he doesn't ask you to, you get to your knees as he tears the condom off.
"In my mouth," you beg, and who is he to reject such an offer?
Jerking himself to completion, Jungkook is all pretty and pathetic when he cums, too. Looks at you with eyes so starry you'd been forgiven for thinking he was a descendant of the constellations.
He milks the final few spurts of himself onto your wet tongue, and curses when you press dainty kisses to his tip. Stroking your tongue against him, you don't want to waste a drop. Look up at him and find that his eyes are resting shut from the pleasure of it all.
Silence surrounds you both, just your beating hearts and laboured breaths filling to the room. He helps you up. Holds you tight. Hugs you for a little while, then presses a kiss to the side of your head. "Thanks."
"My pleasure," you giggle - and then he's smiling, too. Feels vindicated by his irrational thoughts about you over the last few days. He pays no mind to the fact you're still technically dressed, and he's basically naked.
As he sorts himself out, you perch back up on his desk and languidly swing your legs. Enjoy the thought of memories plaguing him whenever he tried to play his little games over the next few days.
"You wanna grab a shower?" he offers. "Food, too? Dunno about you, but I'm fuckin' starving."
"Same," you nod, biting down on your bottom lip. "I'll go wash up, you sort food? Are places still open for delivery?"
Checking his phone for the time, Jungkook is surprised that it's closer to midnight than it is to his morning alarm. Only a handful of places will offer delivery at this time, but that's enough.
"Works for me," he says with a yawn, then opens what you had assumed was the closet door. Reveals an en-suite and knocks his head to the side. "Get your shower. Gimmie a shout if you need anything."
Tiles large and grey, it's the perfect counterpart to his bedroom. A little dark, but it's only because Jungkook hates using the big light. Always flicks the small light switches instead. There's a window overlooking the city, and even though you're only seven floors up, the hills of Yongsan-gu mean that he's got a view you could only dream of.
You're about to start the shower up when he calls through. "Is pizza good?"
"Pizza's good," you call back with a smile. Look yourself in the mirror and wonder how the fuck you ended up in the bathroom of arguably the most famous person you've ever met. Decide it's better not to question it.
The shower begins to cascade down, even if your sins are washed way, you know you won't be able to forget the feeling of Jungkook so easily.
Truth be told, you won't even try.
YONSEI UNIVERSITY DORMS DAESIN-DONG, SEODAEMUN-GU SUNDAY 21:13
"L in the chat," booms the voice of Taehyung through your laptop speakers. His trademark grin rests on his face as he teases Jungkook.
You've only just opened the stream. Instantly, you focus on the prettily lopsided smirk of Jungkook's lips. You've learned it's an almost permanent fixture on his boyish face. Shaking his head, he's adjusting his headset. Making it a little looser so that it'll fit him properly.
No one is questioning it.
What they are questioning, is where the fuck that pretty purple bruise on his neck has come from.
"Cross-fit," Jungkook just shrugs, knowing that it's the colloquial term for suspicious bruises after some idol used the same excuse. Blatant horseshit. Jungkook doesn't care.
"I've never done cross-fit, but I know you're bullshitting," Taehyung snorts.
The chat seems to agree with him.
"Thought I was a virgin?" Jungkook states a little cheekily, making reference to Taehyung's usual banter. "How else would I get one?"
Taehyung knows better than the retort. Knows that Jungkook could very easily slip something about Rae into the conversation.
Virgin? You type through a message on a private discord chat with Jungkook. He'd set it up the day before. Has already sent you, like, a thousand messages. Is what can only be described as obsessedâbut it's mutual. Could have fooled me.
As his eyes glance down to his laptop screen, he fails to hide his smile. Had opened your chat on there, cause he didn't wanna accidentally broadcast the messages onto his stream. Despite this, he doesn't care that there are nearly 10,000 people in his stream merely minutes into it. Is far more interested in his chat thread with you. Replies immediately.
Stop distracting meI'm working</3
Giggling as the message pings through to you, there's a giddy quality to the way Jungkook makes you feel.
He'd spent the day in bed with you after your night together. Had wanted you to stay when he started streaming that evening. Said he'd only be an hour or so, and was incredibly pouty when you did leave.
It had just been him on last night's streamâheadset off 'cause he didn't wanna adjust it back yet, hoodie on to hide his neck. The other boys were nursing hangovers, so he could do what he liked.
What he did do had you incredibly curious. Was just chatting. Talking to the comment section. Sleepily reeling off facts he'd recently learned about butterflies. Debating over their lifespan.
You're not naive to the fact that Jungkook does this streaming stuff as a profession, and are aware that the more people talking about his stream on other platforms, the more viewers he'll get.
Made sense for him to add fuel to the butterfly-related fire by talking about them.
Had sent you a message earlier that evening to ask what kind of butterfly you had on your skin.
A Monarch, you'd told him.
"See, the thing is," Jungkook had rambled to his viewers a little later on. "Most butterflies have super short lifespansâMonarch's included."
Eyes all starry, lights in his bedroom purple as per usual, he'd looked cosy. You wished you'd have stayed.
"But there's a specific kind. Migrating Monarchs. They're the last of their generationâthe final butterflies of the year," he marvelled at the magic of it all.
His facts were a little hazy, but he knew enough. Had been down a you-shaped rabbit hole all afternoon.
"And they migrate, right? Move away from homeâsomewhere warmerâand then it just extends their lifespan. 180 days. Not 30. That's six months. Six months. It's a long time. It's not fleeting. Not in the slightest."
It's also, curiously, exactly how long you're scheduled to stay in Korea for.
"I dunno," Jungkook had just sighed, a little forlorn, trying to make sense of his thoughts.
He bit down on his bottom lip, stroking his thumb against the hard plastic ears of his headset, then focused on the camera again. Wondered if you were watching.Â
He simply shrugged. Said, "Counts for something, though, right?"
#byholly#jungkook fanfic#jungkook fanfiction#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#jungkook ff#jk ff#jungkook x reader#jungkook imagine#bangtan fic#jungkook fluff#streamer!jungkook#non idol au#bts fanfic#bangtan ff#jungkook fic#jeon jungkook x reader
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â LADY OF THE ROSES (III)
PART ONE || PART TWO || PART FOUR
PAIRING â Ser Gwayne Hightower x fem!Reader // Tyrell!OC
SUMMARY â Six moons of marriage have passed and an unexpected visit of Lord Jason Lannister causes Ser Gwayne and the new Lady Hightower to have their very first disagreement. Not long after, she gets pregnant with their first child.
AUTHORâS NOTE â Itâs written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Readerâs looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is a Tyrell. + You donât have to know the previous chapters to understand this one. I wanted to include Gwayne and Reader having their first child in the previous part already but it was too long and the time skip would be too big so I decided to turn it into yet another chapter of the story. Since the pregnancy and birth would be quite boring, I added some drama with Lord Jason aka Reader's previous suitor from the first chapter (but the details are not required to be known if you haven't read the first part!). There will be one more part to this story for which I am very excited! đ Thank you for all the nice comments. đ
WARNINGS â Lord Jason being himself, pregnancy, birth
WORD COUNT â 6,130
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
LADY OF THE ROSES (III)
First six moons of your marriage had passed by quickly and peacefully. You couldnât believe it was half a year already and you were very pleased with how everything you had been so scared about turned out to be not so bad â performing marital duties was nothing but pleasure and fun, meanwhile running Oldtown could be exhausting sometimes but you still enjoyed it most of the time and you proudly held your head high while helping your husband with all his obligations around the city and the castle.
Having your own property with your own servants to order around was a good feeling, too. Not that you wanted to abuse the power that had been given to you but it was simply nice not to be someoneâs daughter but your own Lady. Well, your husbandâs â but he had never made you feel like that. Ser Gwayne Hightower was a chivalrous knight who was treating his duties and honour very seriously. He knew that being a husband did not only mean getting but it also meant giving. He was your protector and a shoulder to cry on, a strong hand to hold you and lead you and fight for you. You trusted him with your life and you would never doubt his loyalty to you.
Sometimes you wondered why had gods blessed you with such a good husband as you doubted if you had deserved him. Not that you were a bad person but you had your flaws â your pride, your stubbornness. Yet, you had not fought even once yet with your Lord Husband.
Well, once, nearly. Gwayne had suggested that perhaps you should start wearing more modest clothing because The Highgarden fashion was a bit too revealing for Oldtown. You had scoffed at that and he had not brought that up ever again.
You knew that The Highgarden fashion was considered too exposing for lots of regions of Westeros. Only Dornish women liked even riskier gowns but Oldtown was a part of The Reach so its people were not shocked to see a Tyrell Lady in a revealing dress. You had a feeling it was your Lord Husbandâs personal preference because his own sister was known as a woman of strong faith and modesty like her mother before her.
Despite being Lady Hightower now, you still felt a very strong bond with The Tyrells. You always wore a golden ring with a rose on it and you loved all sorts of ornaments and decorations in the shapes of roses. You were corresponding with your Lady Mother and sisters every week and sometimes you were still signing the letters as Lady (Y/N) Tyrell â out of habit that was visibly saddening your husband whenever heâd catch you doing that.
Just like right now as you were sitting by your desk and Gwayne was handing out letters for you to sign them. Those were some official matters that he was supposed to send out to his vassals but ever since he was married and Oldtown had a Lady, he insisted on you both signing them even though it was not a popular custom for husbands to insist on such things.
You didnât even read those letters since you trusted him as you mindlessly kept signing a letter after a letter. You gave him back the last one and he sighed, which made you look up and raise an eyebrow at him.
âWhat is it?â You asked.
âLady (Y/N) Tyrell,â he read out loud and you felt bad at the sight of his sad expression.
âI am sorry,â you reached out to squeeze his wrist. âI was not focused enough,â you admitted.
âI shall rewrite this one,â Gwayne waved the letter in the air.
âNo, I shall do it,â you took it from him gently. âOr will it be seen as something inappropriate when they realise it was the wifeâs handwriting?â
âNo, it wonât be,â Gwayne smiled at you and allowed you to take the letter. âCan I stay here and watch you work?â
âWhat kind of husband asks such a thing?â You chuckled at him. âOf course, my love,â you leaned into his hand as he caressed your cheek and you placed a soft kiss upon his fingers.
Gwayne sat in the armchair by the window inside your chambers. You would spend some of your days here but all nights so far you had slept with him. However, the chambers he had prepared for you were so beautiful that it would be a waste to never spend your time inside them.
You rewrote the letter and handed it for him to sign and then you could start working on answering the letters that were addressed to you specifically. Gwayne kept sitting in the armchair and looking at you, occasionally staring out of the window. It was peaceful and quiet and you wished that moment could last forever.
The next envelope on the pile of letters made you furrow your brows. It was red and the golden wax seal had The Lannister lion on it. You checked twice if it was really addressed to you and not to your Lord Husband but no, it was very clearly addressed to âLady (Y/N) Hightower of Oldtownâ.
âWeird,â you hummed to yourself when you opened the envelope with a small dagger, without breaking the seal.
âWhat is it, my darling?â Gwayne turned his head around to look at you since he had been gazing out of the window and staring at the water.
âIt is from Lord Jason Lannister and it is addressed to me instead of you,â you told him. It felt quite inappropriate so you wanted your husband to know for you would never hide anything of such a matter from him.
Perhaps you would not be so suspicious about it if you didnât have a history with Lord Jason. He had been one of your suitors and your fatherâs favourite. In fact, he had been plotting with your father behind everybodyâs back to win the tournament for your hand and he had been playing dirty by using his knight brother to pretend to be him.
âAnd what does he want?â Gwayne crossed his arms.
âWell, allow me to read the letter first,â you rolled your eyes playfully as you began reading.
Gwayne was trying to be very patient but from the corner of your eye you could see that he was tapping his arms with his fingers and you found it pretty amusing so you read the letter three times before putting it down and taking a deep breath in as you laid your eyes on your husband.
âHe wishes to visit us. He claims he was around for his friendâs wedding and he wishes to stay at The Hightower for the night on his way back home,â you explained.
âWhat friend, Iâm wondering?â Gwayne snorted. âOldtown is never on anyoneâs way. It is usually a destination, not a stop.â
âHe says his friend is Lord Bulwer, they are our vassals from Blackcrown. He must reach Oldtown to get on the Rose Road. It is a faster way to get back to Casterly Rock than to travel alongside the shore,â you explained because, sadly, Lord Jannisterâs excuse sounded very realistic. âWell?â You asked Gwayne. âWe must give him an answer.â
âWe are not in a state of war with The Lannisters, are we? We shall let him stay for the night,â your husband sighed and stood up to read the letter himself as if he wanted to make sure there was nothing inappropriate in it.
In the meantime, you began working on a reply letter to Lord Jason Lannister. Your husband kept standing behind you and examining every word you were writing down. He had never done that before, even when you had been writing letters of much bigger importance.
âI donât mind you being in the same room as me while I work but this is a little uncomfortable, my love,â you tried to make him realise calmly when you were about to sign the letter.
âDo not forget your surname this time,â Gwayne reminded you and you furrowed your brows at the tone of his voice. It was not rude but certainly harsher than usual.
âLady (Y/N) Hightower,â you signed silently, âof House Tyrell,â you added, just to spite Gwayne and you didnât have to look up to know that he rolled his eyes. However, he did not say anything.
Lord Jason was supposed to come three days later in the evening, right in time for the supper. You wore a green dress for that occasion but you had a rose-shaped jewellery that your husband usually did not mind but on that day he seemed to be bothered by it.
âThis jewellery is beautiful, dear wife, but are you sure it goes well with the dress?â He asked during breakfast as you froze.
âSince when are you an expert?â You turned your head around with widened eyes. Well, Gwayne knew quite a lot about fashion but his comment had irritated you.
âSince I am a married man,â he cracked a nervous smile at you.
âYellow roses always go well with green for those are the Tyrell symbols,â you reminded him with a forced, ironic smile.
âIs this how you wish to greet Lord Jason in Oldtown? As Lady Tyrell?â Gwayne raised an eyebrow at you.
âI have been walking around this city in this very dress and jewellery many times before and you have never said anything!â You protested and Gwayne blushed a bit because he had no idea what else to say.
You went back to eating because you didnât want to torment him more by pointing out the flaws of his argumentation, however he did not choose silence at all.
âThe dress is also quite low-cut,â he mumbled.
âYes, it is, my beloved Lord, and what about it?â You clenched your fist around the fork you were holding.
âI suspect not many Lord Husbands would want their wives to greet their previous suitors in such a dress,â he commented.
âI have never treated Lord Jason as my suitor,â you scoffed. âAnd what is wrong with the dress?â
âNothing,â Gwayne quickly fixed himself. âNothing is wrong with the dress, my beautiful Lady,â he assured you and went back to eating.
âAre you perhaps jealous of Lord Jason? Do you wish to impress him or show me off as your property?â You asked after the sudden realisation as you laid your eyes on him again.
âProperty? No. My wife,â Gwayne clenched his jaw as he explained. âI want to show you off as my Lady Wife.â
âMy darling,â you smiled and shook your head as your anger subdued. You leaned in to kiss his cheek. âI would have chosen you as my champion during that tournament even if you were a beggar knight from a peasant family. I would love you even if you were a miller, a carpenter, a fisherman. And no amount of Lannister gold would convince me to go with Lord Jason anywhere,â you assured your husband and fixed his hair gently. âI want to show you off as my Lord Husband in front of him just as much.â
That seemed to calm Gwayne down for now as he nodded with a small smile and even stole a little kiss from your lips. You were alone by the table and the few servants walking around would not scold you for that anyway.
The sun was slowly setting down when you were standing by Gwayneâs side in the courtyard of The Hightower and awaiting Lord Jason Lannister. Your arms were brushing and you kept looking at each other once in a while as if you were giving each other courage. Not that you needed it but Lord Jason was rather insufferable and you knew that losing temper around him would not be good for your relations with The Lannisters. The relations were pretty fragile already anyway.
Finally, you heard the horses and saw a big, elegant carriage with the Lannister lion ornamented on its doors.
âI thought he would travel on a horseback,â Gwayne mumbled.
âWell, he is not a knight. He is used to certain comfort,â you whispered and wore a fake smile that very moment when one of your servants opened the door of the carriage and you saw Lord Jason walking out.
He looked around as if he could not see you nor your husband at first. Then, he faked a smile as well and approached you.
âLord and Lady Hightower,â he looked you up and down and kissed the palm of your hand when you bowed your head down.
âLord Lannister,â you greeted him.
âSer Gwayne,â he nodded at your husband.
âLord Jason,â Gwayne nodded back. âYou must be tired after the journey. Come, the supper is ready and your chambers have been prepared.â
âThank you. I have never been to The Hightower, I must admit,â Lord Jason followed you inside. He kept looking around like a curious cat.
âHow did you get to Blackcrown, my Lord?â You asked him curiously since you and Gwayne had been wondering about it earlier â why was he asking you for a room to stay on his way back only.
âI went there by a ship, Lady Hightower, but the ship was the wedding gift for my friend,â Lord Jason answered and you nodded.
âYour wedding gifts are very generous, my Lord,â Gwayne pointed out.
âWell, I can afford such,â Lord Jason grinned at him as you reached the dining hall. âYou must forgive me for not sending one to you, Ser, but in my position of a failed suitor, it would have been pretty humiliating,â he explained and you pretended to understand his point of view.
And it was not like you cared about any gifts from him anyway.
âPlease, let us not dwell on the past,â you showed Lord Jason an empty chair by your husbandâs side and he took it after you and Gwayne had sat down as well.
âI am not meaning to, my Lady,â Lord Jason informed you proudly. âI am a married man myself now.â
âOh, are you? Congratulations, my Lord,â you smiled at him even though he had never congratulated you on your union. âTo whom?â
âLady Johanna of House Westerling,â Lord Jason answered and you hummed to yourself.
âWell, she is a lucky Lady,â you tried to be kind.
âThank you, that is very flattering, Lady Tyrell,â Lord Jason bowed his head and Gwayne shot him a deadly glance. âOh, do forgive me, Lady Hightower. The colours you are wearing have misled me,â he explained with a grin and you faked a smile but you began to feel guilty for not listening to your husband earlier.
âGreen is the colour of House Hightower,â your husband reminded Lord Jason.
âIndeed but the rosesâŚâ
âMy wife is not forbidden from wearing the emblems of her fatherâs house,â Gwayne interrupted Lord Jason and it was rude enough to make all of you sit in silence for a moment after that.
âLord Jason,â you started quickly to change the subject, âwhy isnât your Lady Wife with you?â
âIt was not recommended in her fragile state. Lady Lannister is expecting,â Lord Jason straightened himself and you could see pride and smugness about him.
âCongratulations, my Lord,â you nodded at him.
âArenât you afraid of leaving your pregnant Lady Wife alone for so long when it is no matter of life and death keeping you apart from her, my Lord?â Gwayne asked and you clenched your jaw before kicking him slightly under the table.
âSer Gwayne, there is nothing in this world women do better than give birth. She does not need my assistance,â Lord Jason found it quite funny, though, as he laughed but he was the only one doing so. âSpeaking of, Iâve expected to see Lady Hightower being swollen already. How long has it been now since the wedding? Six moons?â
You froze at his question. It was incredibly rude to be up in other peopleâs business like that.
You had been discussing the matter of children with Gwayne in the very beginning of your marriage and you both had decided you wanted some time for yourselves before having children and to enjoy each otherâs company first. You were regularly drinking teas prepared by The Hightowerâs maester to prevent you from getting pregnant and so far it had been working. But if it had failed, you wouldnât be sad about it either, for you couldnât wait to have your babes soon anyway.
You exchanged a meaningful look with your husband, not knowing what to say. If you told Lord Jason the truth â that you wanted to wait and enjoy each otherâs company â he would only scoff at that and find it hilarious.
âAnd who has told you that I am not swelling, my Lord?â You answered swiftly before Gwayne opened his mouth.
Lord Jason looked you up and down before humming to himself.
âWell, congratulations, Ser,â he patted Gwayne on his back.
âThank you,â Gwayne gritted through his teeth and gave you a scolding look. âIt is still very early news, though,â he added.
âMay the Gods bless Lady Hightower and her offspring,â Lord Jason nodded at you and it somehow felt very sincere.
âThank you, Lord Jason,â you gave him the very first genuine smile that evening.
The rest of the supper went pretty boringly and you said goodnight to Lord Lannister before the servants took him to his chambers. You and Gwayne went upstairs in awkward silence.
On your way to your husbandâs room, you passed the door to your chambers. They were a floor below Gwayneâs chambers that were located at the highest level of The Hightower.
âI shall join you later,â you only mumbled out and he nodded, watching you disappear inside your room.
Your maids were already waiting there to help you into your nighttime attire. You kept sighing and they were exchanging looks.
âHow was it, my Lady?â One of them asked. She knew your backstory with Lord Jason because she was one of the girls you had taken with you from The Highgarden.
âLord Jason is insufferable as always and even though he is married now himself, he finds great enjoyment in tormenting my Lord Husband,â you told her.
âWell, my Lady, I doubt Ser Gwayne is angry at you,â her eyes widened.
âI do not know anymore. I have worn a dress he did not approve of and it indeed caused trouble. I have also said something⌠Something I should have not said and I have said it to defend his honour but he might not see it this way,â you confessed.
âSer Gwayne is a very understanding Lord Husband,â the girl assured you and smiled while she brushed your hair.
You kept looking at yourself in the mirrorâs reflection but you werenât sure of her words. That supper had gone worse in the beginning than you had even imagined.
You thanked your maids and they left you alone but you kept sitting in the armchair and staring at yourself and at the candles slowly burning out instead of moving up and joining your husband as you had promised.
For the first time during your marriage, you simply blew out the candles and went inside your own bed. It even felt weird to lay there since you were not used to it but it just felt like the right thing to do on that night.
You couldnât fall asleep though. And after a while of tossing and turning, you heard the doors open as the wooden floor squeaked under someoneâs feet.
âWho is it?â You sat up immediately.
âAnd who do you think, my Lady?â A familiar voice made you sigh out of relief.
You reached your hand out in the darkness and Gwayne grabbed it as you led him into your bed.
âWhy didnât you bring a candle with you?â You asked.
âI felt a little adventurous,â he chuckled. âAnd I know my way to you by heart, my beloved Lady,â he added. âWhy havenât you joined me?â
âI thought you didnât want me to, my Lord,â you admitted when he laid next to you under the cover. You cuddled him immediately by curling up next to him and putting your arm around his waist. âI thought you were cross with me.â
âI am not cross. I simply do not understand why you lied,â he confessed and kissed the top of your head.
âIs it the lie that youâre upset about?â You furrowed your brow. âI do value your honour butâŚâ
âNot the lie itself,â Gwayne interrupted you. âWhy didnât you allow me to inform Lord Jason that we do not wish for children yet?â
âBecause he would not understand and find you weak or assume you are unable to produce an heir and it is nothing but an excuse. I wanted to spare you further embarrassments,â you explained. âAnd⌠I am sorry for the dressâŚâ You added, looking down.
âDo not be. I am sorry for insisting,â Gwayne rubbed your back. âAnd thank you for wanting to spare me embarrassments but now we are facing quite a challenge, arenât we, my love?â
âWhat do you mean, my Lord?â You looked up, finding his blue eyes in the darkness of your chambers.
âI mean that Lord Jason now believes that you are expecting, my darling,â Gwayne smirked a little and you furrowed your brows.
âOh no,â you gasped, faking the dramatic aspect of it. âAnd what shall we do about it now?â You wondered theatrically.
âWell, I have quite a few ideas,â Gwayne leaned in to join your lips together in a kiss as his hands pulled you even closer by your waist.
âAre you sure?â You breathed out between one hasty kiss and another.
âOnly if you are,â he assured you.
âI am,â you nodded. âI am, I am, I amâŚâ You kept repeating, suddenly realising how eager you indeed were to have your own little babe before you allowed your husbandâs lips to devour yours with yet another passionate kiss.
Thankfully, Lord Jason was supposed to leave Oldtown after breakfast. You greeted him in the morning in another green dress and even though this one was pretty low-cut, too, you decided not to wear any roses on that day. Instead, you wore a necklace with The Hightower that had once belonged to Gwayneâs late Lady Mother.
Lord Jason kept staring at your chest and the necklace until it became a little uncomfortable and he cleared his throat before looking up to meet your cold gaze that you were gracing him with.
âI must admit I have not expected The Hightower to be that grand. It really is as tall as they say,â he bowed his head at you.
âWe Light The Way, Lord Lannister,â you reminded him with a forced smile.
âOf course, Casterly Rock remains taller,â he added and you put the cutlery down, irritated. Gwayne gave you a look to remind you to stay polite.
âMy Lord, why the remark? Is it a contest?â You asked him, trying not to sound too angry. âIt is not the size of the castle that proves manhood. I do believe that you have already shown yours during the tournament for my hand in marriage,â you reminded him of his shameful behaviour and cheating. âThe tournament which my husband has won fairly and justly,â you added.
Lord Jason did not say anything. He looked down and went back to eating while his cheeks' colour started to resemble The Lannister emblem.
You squeezed Gwayneâs hand under the table and the rest of the breakfast went pretty smoothly. You went outside to the courtyard to watch Lord Jason ride away. His farewell was pretty short and official. He was not trying to make any jokes anymore.
âMy darling, you have acted as if you were a knight and I was a lady in distress,â Gwayne chuckled at you once you were finally free of Lord Lannister.
âSometimes you are, my Gwayne,â you smiled at him sweetly and leaned in to steal a kiss from his cheek.
âShall I get you a sword, my sweet?â He teased you and you rolled your eyes at him.
âPerhaps another time, Lord Husband,â you chuckled at that.
Two moons later you were watching Gwayne training with his sword as he was teaching a young squire on the courtyard. The day was quite hot but you had nothing else to do and you loved to watch him train anyway so you were sitting on a wooden bench, trying to remain in the shadow but you felt awful nevertheless. The sun felt too warm, the corset seemed to be too tight no matter how many times you had asked your maids to loosen it and you were hungry but too nauseous to eat. You blamed your condition on the weather and your upcoming monthly bleeding, which was late already but the soreness of your breasts could only mean that it would come very soon.
Gwayne kept looking at you from the corner of his eye with a worried expression because he could see that something was not right â you looked exhausted and your skin was a shade paler than normally. There were bags under your eyes and your voice sounded weak whenever you cheered for him or his squire.
He knew he was most likely overreacting but he was panicking deep inside that you could be seriously ill like his mother had been. The beginnings of each illness looked the same and losing you so fast after marrying you would surely kill him, too.
You were too exhausted to even notice the worried look on his face. You raised your head to shield your face from the sun and you felt a sudden dizziness that made you flutter your eyelids as your head grew heavy before losing consciousness for a short while.
When you opened your eyes again, the very first thing you saw was Gwayneâs furrowed brows and blue eyes filled with worry and fear. His cheeks were so pale that his freckles were more visible than ever and the strands of his auburn hair were tickling your face. His squire was standing behind him with widened eyes.
âWh-what happened?â You asked and looked around while your vision was slowly coming back.
âYou have fainted, my love,â Gwayne swallowed thickly.
âIt must be due to the heat,â you tried to explain.
âMayhaps. But I shall not underestimate your condition,â he picked you up the bridal style, carefully.
âWhat are you doing, my Lord?â You chuckled weakly at him.
âI am taking you to the maester,â your husband answered with all seriousness.
You didnât protest because you knew he was worried and to be honest so were you. You only hoped that the maester would confirm that it was nothing serious.
Gwayneâs squire opened the door leading to maesterâs chambers in front of you both and The Hightowerâs maester stood up to bow his head. He had been sitting by his desk and working on something before you came inside.
âMy Lord, My Lady,â he greeted you. âIs everything alright?â
âNo, maester. My Lady Wife has fainted,â Gwayne laid you down gently on a bed.
âIt is because of the heat!â You protested.
âMayhaps,â the maester hummed to himself and approached you to examine you with his hands as Gwayne stood above him and watched worryingly. âHave you slept well, my Lady?â
âOh, I canât sleep for about two weeks now,â you admitted and yawned a little at the mention.
âI understand. What have you had for breakfast, my Lady?â The maester furrowed his brows.
âI was too nauseous to eat,â you confessed.
âMay I ask you when was your last bleeding?â The maester raised an eyebrow.
âIt should come any day now for it was more than a moon ago⌠I am sure it is going to come, though. My breasts are sore,â you lowered your voice a little, feeling uncomfortable with the way he was looking at you and Gwayneâs presence hovering above the both of you.
âMay I?â The maester lifted his hands and you opened your mouth to answer but you noticed that he was looking at your husband and not at you.
âI mean, if you mustâŚâ Gwayne cleared his throat. âAnd if the Lady agrees,â he added and only then the maester laid his eyes on you.
âGo on,â you nodded and your heart skipped a beat when he grabbed your breasts gently through the fabric of the dress and squeezed them carefully. You hissed at the feeling.
The maester hummed to himself and moved his hands away before looking up at Gwayne again. Your husband shook his head out of anticipation.
âAnd?!â He asked.
âLady Hightower is expecting. Congratulations, my Lord,â the maester informed and you opened your mouth slightly at that revelation.
âI⌠I am with child?â You inquired and sat up, feeling the sudden outburst of energy.
âI am quite certain of it. Too many symptoms confirming,â the maester nodded. âAnd when was it that my Lady stopped drinking the tea? Two moons ago, right?â
âThat is quite right,â Gwayne answered and took you by your hand. He squeezed your fingers gently and sat on the edge of your bed. He placed a gentle kiss upon the palm of your hand and looked deep into your eyes with such a loving expression that you felt butterflies all over your body even though you had been married for more than half a year now.
The maester walked away and sat back by his desk to give you some space but you completely forgot about his presence anyway for all that mattered was your husband and his child you were apparently carrying under your heart.
âOh, GwayneâŚâ You stuttered out as your eyes filled with happy tears. âSo it is happening⌠And to think we have Lord Jason Lannister to thankâŚâ
âMy Lady!â Gwayne frowned and chuckled. âDo not say such things. Some people might get ideasâŚâ
âThat is true, I guess,â you laughed at his comment. âAre you still certain that you will not mind a daughter if it is a girl?â
âAll I care for is your safety. And the childâs. In that exact order,â he answered and you gave him a faint smile.
âWhether theyâre a boy or a girl, I just wish for them to be like their father,â you squeezed Gwayneâs hand lovingly. âThat is my greatest wish.â
A slight blush covered his cheeks and you smiled at his reaction. It was quite easy to make him flustered with such compliments for he had not been getting many in his childhood. He had been left alone at eight years old, raised by all the septas and maesters of The Hightower alongside older knights teaching him the craft and chivalry. His life had been quite a lonely one but it no longer would be for you would fill the corridors and courtyards with tiny little Hightowers running around.
Your screams could be heard on every floor of The Hightower â a monument taller than The Wall itself â at least that was what your husband had claimed with a chuckle when you nearly crushed his hand while squeezing it tightly. You gave him a deadly look and he lovingly wiped your sweaty face, pushing away all the hair strands that got stuck to your forehead.
You knew that Gwayne was trying to distract you with his jokes here and there but overall he was very worried â perhaps even more than you were since your pain was too overwhelming to focus on anything else. The septas were busy around you, wiping your sweat away, helping you to drink water and telling you when to push as they monitored the birthing process.
You had not expected your Lord Husband to actually be there for you but he had not disappointed you. You had been conflicted at first for you had been told once that wives should not allow their husbands inside during labour. But you were too scared to go through this alone and the pain was much greater than what you had imagined as well. Gwayneâs presence was bringing you great comfort even if sometimes he was annoying you.
The birth had started after breakfast and the sun was slowly going down already but the septas were assuring you that it would not take long from now on. Gwayne had not left your side even for a moment throughout the whole day.
âI did not mean to upset you, my love,â he explained, caressing your hand as if it was the most delicate thing in the world and not a deadly machine that had nearly crushed his hand on several occasions that day. âYou are the bravest woman in the Realm to me. In all the Realms of this world, in fact,â he assured you and you just couldnât be angry at him any longer.
You smiled and wished to tell him something equally sweet when a sharp pain distracted you and you turned your head around while wincing and squeezing your husbandâs hand tightly again.
âI can see the head!â One of the septas screamed. âGo, fetch the maester!â She ordered the young girl who was only getting her training but seeing her pale face and terrified expression, you wondered if she regretted her decision to become a septa.
On the other hand, as a septa she would never have to go through what you were going through at the moment.
The girl ran out of the room and you kept taking deep breaths in and pushing like the eldest septa was instructing you. Gwayne kept holding your hand throughout that but seeing his face, he needed the breathing instructions as well.
The maester entered the chambers in a hurry with the scared young septa after him and in that very moment the childâs screams and crying filled the room. The sound was so loud and determined that you immediately knew that there was nothing to worry about for only a healthy and strong child could make such a fuss.
The maester hurried to the newborn baby and Gwayne was trying to see as much as possible through all the septas swarming up around you to clean you up a little and wipe your face from all the sweat.
âIt is a boy,â the maester informed and you couldnât help but sigh with relief.
You knew your Lord Husband could not care less about it but you did care â you loved him and you wanted to give him an heir.
âIs he alright?â Gwayne asked with a raspy voice.
âSee for yourself, my Lord. He is a perfectly healthy babe,â the maester approached you two and handed Gwayne his firstborn son. He showed your husband how to hold the little head up and you watched with a loving smile the little bundle of joy staining your husbandâs clothes with blood as he was screaming his lungs out.
âHe is beautiful,â Gwayne mumbled and moved closer to you as you reached out your weak hands to hold your own babe as well. He placed him gently on your chest but his eyes were fixated on the boy. âThank you for him, my love.â
âI thank you, my Lord,â you answered but you did not look up at him either since you kept staring at the screaming child. But when he felt your skin and your heartbeat, he stopped crying immediately and just kept staring at you with huge eyes. You chuckled at that and cried happy tears. âHow do you want to name him?â
âLord Edmund Hightower?â Gwayne suggested. It was no surprise to you that he did not propose his fatherâs name and you liked the sound of Edmund Hightower, so you nodded. You could not care less about the name, you were just glad to have a son and you thought it was only fair for the father to choose his heirâs name anyway.
âI like the sound of that,â you assured your husband as you looked up to meet his gaze.
âSo do I,â Gwayne nodded. âAnd the sight, my Lady,â he added and you felt your cheeks heating up.
Only Gwayne knew how to make you flustered still, after over a year of marriage and right after giving birth to a child, dirty with blood and sweat but to him you were nothing but a victorious warrior that had just survived a battlefield and he admired you now more than ever before.
MASTERLIST
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& btw you can talk to me on pesterchum if you have it.
#@ghostedGlitch#maybe tell me who you are but in the meantime i'm just sitting here looking at my usernames and changing the app theme so like#Only You Can Stop KK From Thinking Of More Chumhandles To Make#having just finished dbdc i'm sitting here like ehehehe simply becomes twainAnnihilation for captor reasons#so if you prefer you could go there too.#also there's like an 80% chance i'll respond in a quirk#it's between my sona alyxei's; my oc veelah's; or s0llux's#harper babbles
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His Favored.
r.sukuna x fem!reader
Warnings: historical au, mentions of violence (towards an OC, but never us. Not even Sukuna is allowed to abuse us!), mentions of blood, mentions of wanting to kill someone, mentions of someone hanging, nudity (reader is a concubine), it gets steamy in the end, but nothing too detailed. (I think) Sukuna is soft(?) in this one.
Wordcount: 3.445 (I would like to say I'm sorry, but I'm not)
Fanart
The servant lays in a bloody mess before you. He was not dead, but you were sure he wished he'd be by now.
Sukuna is staring directly at you. His attention was no longer on the poor soul.
His hands grip your cheeks, and the others hold your wrists.Â
"I told you," Sukuna says, voice low, "to not speak to that servant, or there would be consequences."
He lost his temper today. He has seen you talking to that lowlife, hidden in one of the many hallways in his estate. And as if that wasn't enough, that peasant tried to pull you into his embrace. Forcefully.
Looking back, it was a miracle for him to be still alive.
"Now, why would my concubine disobey my orders just like that?" It was simply inexcusable to him for anyone else to speak to you the way he did when it wasn't any secret that you were, clearly, the curse's favorite.
"The servant... he..." He saw your eyes drifting to the servant again. Nervous. You were in an inner battle with yourself. He had secretly planned to whisk you away from Sukuna's estate so you could have freedom and independence.
You'd felt his kindness and sincerity toward you in the short time you'd known him. You knew he meant well, but it was already too late.
Sukuna, on the other hand, felt that you were hesitating to tell him. Not only that, but you were trying to protect that poor excuse of a man.
It made him want to kill him right on the spot.Â
Then he abruptly let go of you and turned his attention back to the poor soul. You felt the shift in the atmosphere immediately. You knew that if you did not do anything right this instant, the man's head would be rolling around the floor within seconds.
You were trying to figure out what to do.Â
If you asked for it to stop, your master would get the wrong idea and kill the man without hesitation. You were sure of it.
"My lord," You had to try to defuse this situation. "may I ask for us to speak privately?" If not for the sake of the man on the floor, then for your sanity.Â
"I will tell you everything, but please... alone." Sukuna stopped in his tracks upon hearing your request.Â
If it were anyone else's request, no, others would not dare to. They only dare to speak to him when he addresses them. But you, you were always a particular case for Sukuna.Â
For a moment, you were met with nothing but silence. You feared that you had made everything worse and sealed the servant's faith.Â
But then, without warning, Sukuna turned back to you, grabbed you by your wrist, and led you out of the throne room.
You did not dare look back to see if the servant was alright. Knowing it would end in unwanted bloodshed.
"Uraume!"
You haven't even noticed Uraume standing there. But you weren't given the time to properly acknowledge them, as your shared master dragged you forward.
"Ensure that the filth's wounds are taken care of, and lock him in his room until I decide what will become of him!" He spat.
Sukuna leads you to his room.
It wasn't the first time you were here, but the first time you didn't know the outcome of what would happen.Â
The curse let go of you after sliding the Shoji shut. He leaves you standing in the middle of the room. Sukuna's dark eyes meet yours.
"Explain." He didn't yell.Â
For a moment, you believe you would've preferred if he did. It was a painful reminder of how patient he was with you. Of how much you could get away with.
"The servant wanted to take me away from here. I told him that I wanted to stay. But he kept pressuring me."
Sukuna leans against the wall, staring at you with a dangerous, hungry light in his eyes. The fact that you wanted to stay was good. He likes it when you're obedient.
"I never wanted to leave you, my lord." You got down on your knees and bowed until your forehead touched the ground. "Please, you have to believe me."
Sukuna looked at you for a long moment. He lets out a low growl, stepping up to you so that he towers over you. "Prove it, concubine."
"He wrote me letters. I can show you." You were still looking at the floor. You knew you had to be careful. If you say something wrong, misstep, or accidentally anger him more, the servant won't live to see the next day.
Sukuna raises an eyebrow at that, curious. "Show me."
"They are in my chambers."
Sukuna steps back, ordering you to stand and lead the way to your room.
"Here."
Sukuna sat on your bed as he took the letters and unfolded them. But before skimming each word, he takes a good look at you.Â
You stood there with all your might. There's not a bit of fear in your eyes, just concern.Â
Ever since your village offered you as an addition to his harem, the curse felt that there was something about you. Sukuna felt a strong pull toward you, an attraction he had never felt for someone else.
"The servant, Yuto, told me a week ago that he fell in love with me and asked for my hand." You studied Sukuna momentarily, wondering if mentioning his name was wise.
Sukuna, however, didn't pay any mind to that. Instead, he tried his best to conceal his surprise.Â
He thought that you would try to protect the lowlife. Try to convince him to let him go, but you tell how things were - nothing but the truth - without concealing anything.
"I told him that I didn't feel the same way. But he wouldn't give up. I didn't want to cause too much attention towards this."
You didn't feel alarmed per se. It was just very out of character for the curse to react the way he currently was. He was too calm about all of this newfound information.
Sukuna chuckles at that. "Or were you too afraid?" tone mocking.
"I was afraid of what you would do to him." He raised a brow at that. So, you elaborated a bit more. "He does not deserve to die because he fell in love."
When he hears your words, his eyes darken again. Sukuna eyes you, and you can tell that his thoughts seem elsewhere.
"You're right." As you watch him, he gets up from your bed and approaches you to stand directly before you, towering over you.
"One does not deserve to die for simply falling in love, dear concubine."
Standing before you, you could now practically feel the bloodlust radiating from him.Â
"But trying to steal someone else's property, especially when said property belongs to me, the king of curses, is where every human with minimum survival instincts may draw the line." he spat, full of venom.
You averted your gaze from him. You knew he was right. You, too, could not understand where Yutu's boldness came from.
But then again, love does blind people.
"That bastard deserves to perish for even thinking he had a chance to get away with it." now that was more like the Sukuna, you know.Â
You felt smaller with every passing second, and you could no longer think of a way to save the servant's life.Â
When you looked down on one of your master's hands, you could see the letters in a tied grip. The papers were utterly wrinkled.Â
Not that it mattered.
"Or is it perhaps that my dearest concubine grew close to that poor excuse of a man and began to like the idea?"Â
Your eyes snapped to him in an instant. "I didn't grow close to him. I didn't even like him." you desperately needed him to believe you.
"If that were the case," Sukuna counters, "why did you keep these letters?"Â
You immediately began to shake your head. "I never let him believe he had a chance. I always told him that I belonged to you, my lord." The way Yuto kept insisting the past week made you uneasy; even remembering it made you feel uncomfortable.
Sukuna then gently stroked your hair - a silent apology after noticing your growing discomfort.Â
He didn't mean to talk to you in that tone, but the mere thought of you being possibly interested in someone other than him-
"I kept the letters because I wanted you to believe me when I told you."
The curse nods, seeming to accept what you're telling him. It pleased him that you were thinking about telling him. "Good girl." His fingers slip down to your chin, stroking it gently.
"I wanted to tell him to stop today, but then you saw us, and- you know the rest."
Sukuna nods, his fingers still caressing your chin. "Indeed... but I want us to go over our boundaries again, dear concubine. I should not have to remind you what happens when you speak to other men besides me."
"No, my lord." you felt the room lighten up again, and for a moment, everything seemed to return to normal. "You should not worry; I will never accept a man who claims to love me. I know my place." you tried to brighten up the mood. But then-
"And if I was the one who loved you?" he asks, tone turning dangerous. "What if I was the one who desired you? Would you have given me your hand?" Sukuna looked at you with his intense eyes again. Something hidden behind them, something you could not read, but your heart answered before your mind could comprehend what was happening.
"I would."
Sukuna considers you for a long moment, his gaze boring into yours.Â
"I know you to be loyal and obedient, and because of that, I am not as concerned... but I need you to make this promise regardless." Sukuna leans closer to you, his eyes dark and fierce. "If another man speaks to you, you will tell me. No secrets, no hiding that from me."
You nod at that, still not trusting your voice enough. The thought that the king of curses could be jealous and possessive of you made you smile a bit.
Sukuna smiles at you and strokes your cheek and hair. "Good girl, you look beautiful when you smile."
He still didn't know what to do with the servant, but he knew he had had enough of this useless conversation.
His tone shifts again, voice low. "Let us not dwell on this further. Shall we go to bed?"
"Whenever you please."
Sukuna laughs softly, his tone playful and flirtatious. "Let's not get too ahead of ourselves," he teases you as he pics you over his shoulders and takes you back to his chambers.
Of course, he could stay here and take you right then and there, but he wanted to spend the night in comfort with you.Â
"Here, let me help you out of these things."
"Yes, my lord."
Sukuna removes your dress, leaving you in a thin chemise. He moves behind you, his hands slipping to the laces of that piece of clothing, his breath warm on your skin.
It feels all too domestic to romantic. And somehow, you can't seem to shake something off your mind. You weren't sure what would become of the servant. But something about your conversation with your master seemed to be off.Â
"My lord, may I ask something?"
Sukuna hums. "Ask away, dear concubine."
How should you put it? This road you were taking could lead to death, but on the other hand, you needed to know. So you took a risk.
"You asked me if it were you who'd love me."
Sukuna momentarily stops what he's doing. "Yes, I remember..." a dangerous glint enters his dark eyes again for a moment, but it vanishes as quickly as it does. "Continue, dear concubine."
"I- if.. if it's not too bold of me to ask."
The last concubine who dared ended up hanging in the backyard as a reminder of your status - a reminder never to seek more. It would be best never to forget that your only purpose was to satisfy your master's needs.
"Speak. I'm listening," Sukuna tells you softly, hands returning to work on your laces. His eyes trail down the curve of your neck to your back, lingering momentarily.
He knew where this was going. Today was indeed a day full of surprises.Â
"Do you?" there it was. a silent question. He never thought that you would pull through.
Sukuna's fingers freeze on the remaining laces of your clothes, his hands stilling. "... Do I what?" he asks cautiously.
"Do you love me?" The curse didn't know what to say first. He could deny it and proceed as if nothing happened, but the way your voice calls to him like you were hoping for some miracle.
His voice is barely above a whisper when he finally replies to you. "...I do."
"You- you Do? But- you have so many beautiful concubines at your service. So many women who'd willingly offer themselves to youâŚ" your voice lost confidence, turning smaller with every passing second.
"None compare to you," Sukuna promises, voice soft and genuine. "None have a hold on my mind like you, my dear concubine. I do not feel for them what I feel for you."
Sukunas's hands slip to your waist and work on your laces again. "Do you think you could come to love me as I have you?" he asks.
It takes you a moment to respond. Sukuna is uncharacteristically patient with you.Â
"When that servant first told me about his feelings for me, I told him that my heart already belonged to someone else." you reply breathlessly.
"And who, pray tell, would your heart belong to?" Sukuna murmurs, voice low. The laces are almost finished, the thin chemise the only thing separating you from Sukuna's touch.
"Can I be so bold?"Â
Sukuna hums, a low grin curving his lips. "Yes."
He pulls the last lace free, the garment falling at your feet. "Tell me, dear concubine, whose heart do I have?" he questions eagerly, turning you around and looking straight at your eyes.
"Mine."
Sukuna smiles at you, his eyes shining brightly. "You are truly a good girl," he exclaims, a voice full of affection. "But that answer proves what you knew all along, doesn't it?"
Sukuna begins to move against you, his hand now caressing your cheek, and he leans down towards you as if expecting you to kiss him. His dark eyes are locked on yours as if looking for your consent.
You give a slight nod.
Sukuna cups your face in both hands, his fingers gently pushing your hair out of the way. He moves slowly, not breaking eye contact until your noses and lips are all but touching. His breath is warm against your skin, your heart racing.
"Is this what you want, dear concubine?" he whispers, low and sultry, full of desire for you.
"Am I allowed to speak what I truly want?"
Sukuna chuckles in response, voice low and breathy. "You do know that I allow you to say whatever you'd like, don't you?" he questions you, still close to you that the two of you are almost kissing. "So, speak your mind, dear concubine."
"I- I want to be more than just a mere concubine to you, my lord."
Sukuna stares at you for a long moment, eyes heavy with consideration. "And what more would you like to be to me, dear concubine?" he whispers, looking down at you. "Do you wish to ascend past this place of yours... to be on equal footing with me?"
"I would never dare to ask such things."
"But, if I were to offer them to you, would you accept... dear concubine?" Sukuna's voice is low and husky.
There's promise there, hope, and a little bit of lust. You've been a good and loyal concubine, not one to ever ask for more than what you've been given, and he rewards loyalty.
"What if I allowed you to become my equal?" it all sounds too good to be true.Â
"Then- then I would be selfish and accept."
"There is nothing wrong with being a little bit selfish," Sukuna reminds you, his fingers running through your loose hair.
"You deserve this, my dear concubine. You have been loyal and obedient for as long as you've been here. You deserve to be treated as my equal."
Sukuna's eyes gleam, his gaze lingering on you in a way you hadn't known him to do before.
"You are more than just a servant," Sukuna says, voice low.
"I'm willing to give you a new title, my dear concubine..." he pauses, taking a deep breath before he continues.
His gaze is locked on yours, his eyes sparkling with love and lust. "I want to make you my wife."
"W- wife? As in- in your lady?"
"You will be my lady, yes," Sukuna tells you, voice huskier as he speaks. "My dear, loyal wife. And I will be yours. You will be queen alongside me."
"Your body belongs to me," he adds. "But in every other regard, you will be my equal. We will walk among the humans together, as their rulers, in love, in trust. And I will grant you anything you desire... no matter how dark."
"I- I don't know what to say."
"Then do not say anything," Sukuna tells you. He lifts your face towards him until your lips are almost touching. "Show me with your actions how you feel about this, dear concubine."
"Show me what you feel," he adds, voice low. His gaze is heavy with desire for you, and your heart pounds in your chest, heat rising to your cheeks at his words.
Sukuna is kissing you passionately, his hands tangled in your loose hair and pulling you closer. You can feel the force behind the kiss, the want and need from the curse, which sends your body into chaos. He moves a hand down, driving up your body with purpose. They continue moving upwards, over your ribs and chest, to cup your breasts, squeezing them gently before they caress you.
"I want this. Everything you're willing to give. I want to be selfish. I want you, pleaseâŚ"
Sukuna responds to your words by deepening the kiss and pulling you even closer to him. He's no longer in the mood for words, his hands sliding up your curves to your neck, pinning you to the wall.Â
He's gentle, despite the force of his kiss, and he makes sure he doesn't hurt you â but there's no denying he wants you, and you can feel the lust spilling from him as he pushes his body more and more onto yours.
Sukuna groans into the kiss. Your mouth is against his, your lips and his moving back and forth to satisfy this thirst between you two.
He breaks from the kiss and stares at you with soft eyes. His smile is heavy and filled with love, and he leans to press another kiss against your lips. "Then, from today on, dear concubine, you will be my wife."
"You are mine," Sukuna says to himself, too lost in this moment. "My wife, my love. No longer my concubine, my subject, but my equal."
He trails more kisses against you, those of love rather than lust. They are soft and gentle as if he's promising you only the best.
When the two of you are breathless, Sukuna carries you toward the bed. Your heart flutters within your chest as if you're in a dream come true. He lays you upon the bed, and his lips are again moving against yours, soft and gentle, full of love, as if he's worshipping.
He pulls back to look down at you, his eyes heavy. He is long gone. Body and mind filled with nothing but pure ecstasy. "Mine."
"Always yours, my lord." The curse's tone was possessive and full of devotion. It made you breathless to think that was all for you.
Sukuna's eyes locked with yours, his every movement designed to be as erotic as possible. His kiss is heavy, and how he moves against you is enough to force a moan from your lips. His fingers explore your body, moving lower slowly so that you are practically panting by the time he reaches his destination.
"Let me love you in every way possible."
#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#sukuna#ryomen sukuna#fem!reader#jjk
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Where The Shadows Dance - The Proposition (i)
Bodyguard!Azriel x AutumnDaughter!Reader
CHAPTER I: The Proposition
SUMMARY: Beron has invited the High Lord and Lady of the Night Court to spend a week in the Autumn Court. Azriel and the rest of the Court of Dream believe he has ulterior motives, and they are correct - but these motives come as a surprise.
WARNINGS: Um. Misogyny. love that for us (i hate the autumn court). swearing (the f-word (as in fuck)), y/n has daddy issues (bc beron is a cunt) and uh... i haven't read acotar in ages so apologies for any OC characteristics and forgetting everything about the autumn court. but i did read HOFAS recently so hopefully az isn't too out of character. also tw: beron
NOTE: so obviously Y/n is the daughter of the autumn court. we know they have red hair BUT i want this to be as less oc as possible so y/n has your colour hair and u can make up ur own story about why but mine is that she's 'rebellious' (as you'll see later on) and just dyes her hair. also special thank you to my moots @icey--stars and @fieldofdaisiies for proofreading my work! i love you guys<3
WORDS: 2.7K
Azriel glowered at the male sat across from him. Eris either didn't notice or pretended he didn't care as he reclined in his chair, one arm over the back and looking for all the world he was in his own home, rather than the Court Of Nightmares.
"Eris," Rhys drawled, "if you have any information to help us with this meeting with your father, we would appreciate it immensely."
The High Lord of the Autumn Court had invited the High Lord and High Lady of the Night Court to his castle for a week, as a gesture of good will, and an attempt to strengthen their bonds. Of course, the court was suspicious of the intent behind such actions. Although Azriel had sent his contacts in to find any sliver of information, his spies had come back empty-handed.
Eris rolled his shoulders, seemingly at ease despite being surrounded by the Night Court's most deadly warriors. "I am not entirely sure what he wants, but I assume it has something to do with my sister, Y/n."
Y/n, the only daughter of the High Lord of Autumn. She was quite young, by Fae standards â only seventy-nine. She had not fought in the war against Hybern, and had very little training according to Azriel's knowledge.
"Why her?" Feyre asked carefully.
Azriel heard the shift in her tone. She was wondering, as they all were, what Beron intended to do with her. The Autumn Court was just as backwards as the Court Of Nightmares, and females were considered little more than property.Â
Eris simply shrugged, either not hearing the implications in the High Lady's tone, or simply not caring. "That is all I know, I'm afraid."
Cassian grunted, his eyes still on the heir to the Autumn throne. No one was particularly happy about the bargain they had struck with him, but he seemed to be a willing ally. For now.
"What can you tell us about her?" Feyre inquired.
Eris watched her for a moment, before responding, "She is⌠wild. Untamed, and unpredictable."
Despite his words, Azriel sensed a flicker of admiration in his tone. Azriel stored that piece of information away. It could be a weakness of Eris's, his sister. They may need to exploit it one day.
"Sounds like my kind of lady," Mor grinned.
The fact that Mor bothered speak in Eris's presence was a gift that the heir did not appreciate enough. Azriel glanced sidelong at her, noticing the way her unbound golden hair cascaded down her back, and the amount of skin her low-cut red dress revealed. Once, looking at her like that would have sent Azriel mad with longing. But after she had confided in him, after she had revealed she could never love him back because she preferred females⌠some part of him had been relieved to let her go.
Eris scoffed at Mor's comment. "Yes, well, she irritates my father to no end."
There was a silence, and Azriel wondered whether Y/n annoyed Eris as well, before Rhys sighed, "Well, if that's all, Eris, I'm sure you have places to be."
The dismissal was clear in the High Lord's tone, and Eris rose from his chair with a nod before leaving the council room. Everyone was silent as the male left, all eyeing each other. Feyre and Rhys were looking at each other, a clear indication of their telepathic conversation, and Azriel watched the two with a hint of jealousy. Of course he was happy from them â finding one's mate was one of the most fulfilling things one could experience. But he couldn't help but feel a sense of longing for his own. It seemed he was the last of the court to find his mate, and he had a fear that he would never find them.
"Has anyone heard much about this Princess?" Cassian asked, looking towards Azriel.
Azriel shook his head. "She is one of the most guarded individuals in Prythian. My sources struggle to even see her."
"Very guarded indeed," Rhysand murmured.
The Court of Dreams debated between themselves the possibilities of what the High Lord of Autumn could want regarding his daughter. Azriel had a few of his own suspicions â to have her taken away, or perhaps trained in combat â but none of them seemed accurate.Â
After a while of debating plausible explanations for Beron's offer, the court decided to head home to the City of Starlight in order to get a good night's rest before their meeting tomorrow. The High Lord and High Lady were going, as well as Cassian and Azriel. Morrigan was not permitted in the Autumn Court, so she would stay behind with Nesta to hold down the fort while they were gone. Amren would also be travelling to the Autumn Court, and although the monster she was no longer crawled beneath her skin, she made most people wary.
As he lay in his bed, Azriel couldn't help but wonder what awaited him tomorrow. He was curious about what the Autumn High Lord wanted, especially regarding his daughter, although he was also wary. Although Autumn had helped them in the war, they couldn't be trusted. Azriel fell into an uneasy sleep, cautious of the days to come.
Azriel awoke at dawn the next day. They weren't due in the Autumn Court until the evening, so Azriel decided to go through his morning exercises. The Valkyries weren't up yet, so he went through his warm ups, taking his shirt off halfway through. The morning was uneventful, and Azriel ran over the information they had in his head. Eris had suggested that Beron may be seeking a favour of some sort, so perhaps it had something to do with that.
The day passed by quickly, and soon enough, those travelling to the Autumn Court had gathered in the living room of the River House, just as they had planned. Azriel and Cassian wore their scaled, black armour, while Rhys and Feyre wore their finery. Rhysand held his mate's arm, and Azriel grabbed onto Cassian, before winnowing to the entrance of the Autumn Court castle.
It was big, and made of stone. It was quite majestic, if Azriel was being honest â high towers and red and orange flags waving in the wind, large windows showcasing rich carpets and tapestries inside.
Rhys led the way, Feyre on his arm and Cassian and Azriel following closely, and Amren trailing behind. Guards monitored them as they passed through the halls, their armour heavier the closer they got to the throne room. Azriel marked each one as they passed, something he was sure Cassian and Rhysand were also doing.
The doors to the throne room opened, and revealed the High Lord of the Autumn Court sat atop a dais, the Lady of Autumn seated beside him. Beron's sons stood on his left, and his daughter was seated to her mother's right.
Azriel paused at the sight of her. She was beautiful, even by Fae standards. Her h/c hair shone in the Fae light liming the walls, piled neatly on her head in a braid crown. Y/nâs e/c eyes sparked with mischief and curiosity, skimming over the members of Azriel's Court, until they finally landed on him. Her gaze was mesmerising, and Azriel couldn't find it in himself to break it. A small smirk played at the corners of her mouth, as if she were aware of the effect she had on him, although Azriel's mask of icy cold had not budged even an inch. Azriel quickly tore his eyes away from the Daughter of Autumn, marking the guards posted by the doors and the dais, and counting the weapons each of Beron's sons carried.Â
"Beron," Rhysand purred, ever the arrogant High Lord, the mask back up despite the High Lords' meeting all those months ago. "So lovely to see you again. Thank you for inviting us to stay."
Beron rose from his dias and stalked towards the High Lord of the Night Court. Everyone tensed as he stepped closer and closer, and Azriel subtly reached for the dagger at his side. Beron's blood would spray across the marble floors the second Azriel suspected he would harm his High Lord or Lady. But Beron simply held his hand out, and Rhys gripped it tightly, his eyes holding a small amount of surprise.
"Rhysand. A pleasure to have you here," Beron replied. Azriel didn't miss the slight strain in his voice. "You must be hungry. Shall we?"
Beron inclined his head to the dining room and led the way with Rhysand and Feyre at his side. He hadn't even acknowledged the High Lady, something that made Azriel want to rip the maleâs head off, but Rhys got there first.
âAnd what about my High Lady?â Rhys purred, a dangerous edge to his voice.
Beronâs smile faltered slightly, and he glanced at Feyre with a barely concealed look of distaste, as if he would rather rip off his own toenails than address a female with the same amount of respect that he would expect. Azriel felt a protective anger surge through him, and he watched carefully, curious as to what the High Lordâs next move would be.
âOf course,â Beron said, his voice dripping with fake courtesy. âMy apologies, Lady Feyre. Of course it is wonderful to have you both visit.â
Cassian gave Azriel a look that said, And-what-about-us? Aren't-we-wonderful?
Azriel sent him a look back that said, Shut-the-fuck-up.
Beron led them all to the dining room, the Autumn colours present everywhere they looked. The chairs were all high-backed, and Azriel knew that Beron did not care if he and Cassian would be comfortable with their wings. Everyone took their seats â Beron at the head, Rhysand to his left, and Feyre beside him. Azriel sat next to his High Lady, Cassian taking his seat adjacent to the shadowsinger. The Lady of Autumn (still not a High Lady, despite the fact that Viviane was also now a High Lady) sat to Beronâs right, Eris beside her, and Y/n next to him, and across from Azriel. Azriel felt Y/nâs eyes on him, and he met her gaze. There was a curious look in her eyes, a look of anticipation mixed with mischief.
Dinner was served, an array of meats and vegetables placed on the table by servants, mostly lesser fairies. None of them looked Azriel in the eye, and he wondered if it was because they knew who and what he was, or if theyâd been trained not to. Y/n, however, had no such qualms about this, and stared at the shadowsinger unabashedly.
Beron struck up a conversation with Rhys â small talk, something that Azriel internally cringed at, because it was definitely just to fill the silence. Ever the gracious guest, Rhysand responded in kind, although Azriel knew he was wondering what Beronâs ulterior motives were.
âHow do your siphons work?â
The table went silent as Y/n spoke, her cunning eyes trained on Azriel. Beron looked at his daughter with a hint of irritation gleaming in his eyes, as if it was unacceptable for her to speak without permission. Azriel glanced at Rhysand, who was watching the daughter of Autumn with a hint of suspicion in his eyes.
âHow do you know that is what they are called?â Rhys asked, his eyes trained on the only daughter of Autumn.
She shrugged, and answered, âI read a lot in my spare time. I remember reading about the Illyrians, and their siphons. If I remember correctly, Illyrians tend to possess only one, yet the two of you hold several.â
âThere is no need to question our guests, Y/n,â Beron scolded firmly.
Y/n frowned. âI was simply curious.â
âDo not speak back to me,â Beron reprimanded, a burning fury now evident in his eyes.
Y/n slumped back into her chair slightly and bowed her head. âMy apologies, Father.â
Beron didnât even acknowledge his daughter before he turned back to Rhys, as if her mere existence didnât deserve another moment of his time. Azriel watched the female in front of him as she stared at her plate, and felt a sense of sympathy for her. Azriel owed her nothing â he did not know the female in front of him, did not know if she even deserved his sympathy â and yet he felt the need to protect, to wipe that blank expression off of her face.
âOur siphons act as a conduit for our raw power,â Azriel offered, causing Y/n to look up. Beron paused, glancing at the shadowsinger and the Autumn daughter, and Azriel continued, âIt helps to control our magic, to make it precise and nimble, rather than a messy outburst of power.â
Cassian gaped at his brother, as if he had never heard that many words come out of Azrielâs mouth in one sitting. While that was an inaccurate statement, it was true that Azriel never tended to speak in front of new people. He wasnât sure why he had done so anyway. But Y/n bowed her head in thanks at the information, perhaps still wary of answering and speaking without her fatherâs permission, but Azriel had observed a small, triumphant light in the femaleâs eyes at his reply.
Azriel watched as that gleam faded when Beron cleared his throat, gaining the attention from everyone in the room.
âThere is a reason why I have asked you here,â Beron stated.
âSurprise, surprise,â Cassian muttered, and Azriel elbowed him.
Beron glanced at Cassian for all of a second before continuing, âThere has been an attempt on my daughterâs life.â Stunned silence met Beronâs words, and Azriel caught Y/n rolling her eyes. That raised his suspicion â were Beronâs words false, or did she simply believe it was not an issue? âIf it appeals to you,â Beron went on, âI seek to employ one of your Night Court warriors as her personal bodyguard.â
Rhys blinked once, his only sign of surprise. Beron looked at Rhys expectantly, and Azriel could have guessed the thoughts that flew around Rhysâs head.
âWhy one of my warriors?â Rhys inquired carefully.
âI hoped it might help strengthen bonds between our courts,â Beron expressed.
Azriel watched the High Lord of the Autumn Court carefully. There seemed to be no ulterior motives hidden within his demeanour â he did not shift nervously, none of his facial features even so much as twitched.
âAnd say I agree to this,â Rhys said casually, âhow long would you hold onto one of my warriors?â
âUntil the threat against my daughterâs life is eliminated,â Beron answered.
There was silence for a few moments while everyone processed what was happening. Azriel looked at Eris to see the maleâs eyes on his father. They were carefully guarded, a mask in place to ensure no one was able to discern what he was thinking. Azriel turned his gaze to Y/n, and a shadow slithered up by his ear.
She does not believe it to be such a serious matter, the shadow whispered. She wishes for this dinner to be over so she may go back to her quarters and finish her novel.
Azriel blinked in surprise at the information from his shadow. Usually, his shadows would tell him what others could not see and hear â but this felt almost like too much. Yes, his shadows had a tendency to recognise when someone was lying, or what weapons they were concealing, but to give him a personâs unvoiced opinion on a matter was something new.
But indeed, with her chin propped up on her delicate hand, and twirling her dessert fork in the other, she appeared to be completely disinterested. Azriel turned his gaze back to the male beside her, to see Eris already watching his sister. His eyes were cold and calculating as he regarded her, as if he was mentally playing out how this âbodyguardâ situation would go. With the slight frown tugging the corners of his lips downwards, Azriel assumed Eris did not believe it would end well.
âPlease, do take time to come to a decision,â Beron offered. âI do understand this is a lot to ask.â
âWe shall have an answer by the end of the week,â Rhys said with a nod.
Beron nodded back, and Azriel wondered what they were getting themselves into.
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#acotar azriel x reader#azriel imagine#acotar azriel#azriel x reader#azriel shadowsinger#azriel acotar#azriel x you#azriel fanfic#azriel x y/n#acotar x reader#acotar fanfiction#acotar#a court of thorns and roses x reader#a court of thorns and roses fanfiction#a court of thorns and roses#x reader#azriel#fanfiction#writing#azriel shadowsinger x reader#shadowsinger x reader#azriel spymaster#acotar fandom#shadowsinger#where the shadows dance#wtsd
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Covering the Classics Part 7 | Bob Floyd x OC
Summary: Just when Anna starts to feel settled, a simple cookout at her friend's house turns everything upside down. Her jealousy shines through, and there's nothing she can do to try to take it back.
Warnings: Fluff, angst, adult language, masturbation, eventually 18+
Length: 4800 words
Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Female OC (this story is part of the Beer Boy/Sugar and Jake/Jessica universe)
Covering the Classics masterlist. Check my masterlist for more! Thank you to @mak-32 for the beautiful banner!
Things with Bob felt like they shifted back to normal again, and Anna was thankful for that. Every book she let him borrow was returned with a note folded up inside. Some of them were short and simple. When he handed back Love Letters of Great Men, the note simply said The dog eared pages are going to make me cry. But some of them were longer and more elaborate.
She was running a little late to meet him at the usual coffee shop, worried he would already be there. He seemed to end up paying for her drink every single time, which was honestly really sweet of him, but she felt like such a nuisance. When she walked inside, he was there, at a table with two steaming mugs in front of him and his nose buried in a book. In one of Anna's books. In her copy of Wuthering Heights.
Her whole body felt too warm as she thought about how much she would love to have Bob read every single one of the hundreds of books she owned. Maybe even read some parts out loud in that deep, soothing voice. She would love to hear his take on each plot and watch him blush as he called her the expert and asked for her opinions. She would love to take the book from his hands and pull him down into bed with her.
But she couldn't do that. They were just friends. So instead, she dropped down into the empty seat across from him and said, "Hi, Bob," with a smile she hoped wasn't as sad as she felt.
"Anna." Her name sounded like golden perfection when he said it, and she shivered. "This book... I can't stop reading it. I read it twice already," he said with a little laugh. "How in the world do you always know exactly what I'm going to like?"
Because she felt undeniably drawn to him and his preferences and everything about him.
"Because I'm a professional."
He laughed a little more as his pretty lake-blue eyes followed her cup as she brought it up to her lips. When the ceramic touched her, he looked away as his cheeks grew pink. He pushed the book across the table, and when she reached for it, he said, "Uh, just read that note later, okay?"
When she saw the edge of white paper sticking out from the worn pages, she said, "Sure, Bob."
He cleared his throat a little awkwardly. "Did you hear about the change of venue for tomorrow?"
Anna ducked her head. "Yeah, the girls told me about it at lunch yesterday. A cookout? Bradley wants to show off his new grill?"
Bob nodded and said, "Could be a nice change from the Hard Deck for once."
While he wasn't wrong, Anna hated that she still barely had enough money to make ends meet. San Diego was expensive, and when she asked Advanced Calculus what she could bring with her to their house to contribute to the meal, her friend said to bring hot dog and hamburger buns. Anna was already trying to figure out how to scrape together the ten dollars that would be required when Jessica said she already bought some along with chips and pretzels. When she didn't quite meet Anna's eyes, she knew for a fact that Jessica had figured her out.
"Yeah. I suppose," Anna told Bob. But at least at the Hard Deck, Penny didn't usually even charge her for the three dollar ginger ales. And if she did, one of the guys just put it on their tab like it was nothing. When she showed up empty handed to the cookout, she was going to feel awful that Jessica had covered for her.Â
"You want another coffee?" Bob asked, standing with his own mug, but Anna shook her head. She couldn't let him pay for another thing. Perhaps deleting multi millionaire Dev Borah's phone number wasn't her best move. Not that she would ever take advantage of someone for their money. Not after what Kevin did to her.
"No. But thank you. I actually can't stay very long today."
Bob nodded before saying, "No worries. I have dinner plans with Suzanne before Mickey picks me up for D&D anyway."
And there it was once again. The reminder that Bob didn't think about that kiss nearly as much as she did. "I hope you have a great time."
------------------------
It was late on Saturday night, and he should have been in bed, but Bob had his computer out. He reasoned that he could sleep in as late as he wanted tomorrow before heading to pick up the burgers Bradley asked him to bring for the cookout. He could stay up as long as it took for him to finish this poem and finally post it on PoetsAmongUs after looking at it for weeks.
If anyone knew he was writing about Anna, he would probably die on the spot. But nobody in his life knew he wrote anything in his free time, let alone the fact that he wrote poetry. And this poem was getting close to needing a 'mature' label if he was going to post it online.
"What are you doing?" he asked himself softly. Somehow he believed that writing about her specifically would cleanse him of these thoughts, but now he knew he was wrong. He proofread and posted his poem anyway while his skin prickled with need. He'd never experienced the kind of love his friends had, and in spite of all of her hesitations, he could imagine it happening with Anna. If anything, he liked that she seemed cautious and contemplative, he just wished she wasn't still that way toward him.Â
She made him want to keep leaving her notes in the books he borrowed from her, but she also made him feel like an idiot for wanting to do that. It was maddening. He needed to sleep, but he was too warm, imagining Anna once again in place of his faceless lover while he touched himself. He almost couldn't wait until the day when someone else would take her place in his mind, even if it meant settling.
The next day, he drove his old pickup toward the coast with the burgers and a six pack of ginger ale in tow. The Spanish revival style house that Bradley purchased before he and his wife made things official again was cute with desert landscaping, but she was the one who really made it a home. There was art hanging on the walls in every room, including a panoramic watercolor of the scenery of Virginia. The front bedroom had been turned into her home office, and for some reason, she had Bradley's fraternity paddle hanging in there. The house seemed more lived in now, and Bob knew Bradley was much happier for it.
"Hey, thanks man," Bradley told him, taking the bag of burgers when he got there. He was wearing his hideous Grateful Dead shirt and holding two cans of beer on one hand, but he still managed to give Bob a quick hug. "Sugar's out back, setting up some snacks and just generally looking hot. You want a beer?"
Bob held up the ginger ales in response and said, "Thanks, but I'll just have one of these for now." The last thing he wanted was a hangover like he had after their New Year's Eve party.
"Hi!" Jessica said as she and Jake walked inside, and she made a beeline right for Bob. "Have you given any more thought to how I should paint my barbarian?"
He just smiled as she started to push him through the kitchen toward the back door. "We just played yesterday. I didn't know you'd still be in the mood to talk about your ridiculous D&D character."
"Please," she practically whined. "You know how sensitive my barbarian is."
Bob snorted; truly he never would have expected he and she would have had so much in common, but even Jessica couldn't keep his attention once he saw who Bradley's wife was talking to. Anna had some freckles on her thighs. Her cutoff denim shorts went high enough up her legs that he was treated to the sight of freckles everywhere. And that wasn't all. Not even close. The deep "V" of her shirt revealed that there was a pretty good chance the freckles even trailed down inside her bra.
He wasn't going to survive the cookout if he had to look at her all afternoon. Her red hair was clipped up on top of her head with some sort of claw-shaped thing, and her skin was just everywhere. Her neck and her legs and the swell of her breasts. Her fingernails were burgundy again, just like the first day he saw her. She hadn't even noticed him yet, which was terrible, because if she had, he would have looked away by now. Instead he was given ample opportunity to memorize the way her legs looked as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other, shuffling her beat up sneakers a bit along the patio.
"Oh," Jessica whispered, squeezing his bicep gently when he stopped responding to her. "Yeah, that'll do it." Her tone sounded slightly sympathetic, and it made Bob so self conscious. "Let's go say hi."
He shook his head jerkily and muttered, "In a second." Anna was currently laughing, head thrown back in delight, and Bob got the briefest peek at the strip of skin above her shorts and her bellybutton, and his brain actually stopped functioning. When she tipped her head forward again, an overjoyed smile still on her lips, she met his gaze. His brain jump started again as her teeth sank into her bottom lip, and he took a step in her direction before he could reconsider.
"Hey, Bob." She sounded a little breathless as she said his name while Bradley's wife smirked at the two of them. But he and Anna were just friends, and he needed to remember that.
"Anna," he replied softly, slipping his hands into his jeans pockets. His palms were sweaty, and he knew he was blushing. He'd never make it out of here alive. Not when she was looking at him like that.Â
She smiled and said, "I came up with a few, slightly more obscure book recommendations for you. I was thinking maybe we could go back to the bookstore and look for some of them that I don't currently own? I might be fun to-"
Bob was already about to agree with whatever she said, because it sounded exactly perfect to him, then he heard someone screeching his name.
"Bob!" There was a brunette flash streaking across the small backyard, and then Natasha Trace was in his arms. She was giggling next to his ear where she kissed his cheek three times in a row, knocking his glasses askew.
"I didn't know you were coming home today," he said in surprise.
"I didn't tell anyone except Bradley. Did I surprise you?" she asked.
"That's an understatement, Nat," he replied, hugging her tighter when she refused to let go. "I missed you."
Her familiar laughter was comforting as she said, "You have no idea how much I hate flying with anyone other than you." When she finally started to pull away from him, she added, "Now we can pick up where we left off before my deployment."
-----------------------------
Anna couldn't believe how incredible her friend's house was. It was huge and beautiful, and she had a yard. A yard! In California! There was colorful art on the walls, which appeared to be a collection of things that she and Bradley enjoyed. Her office was something Anna could only dream about, and the kitchen was bigger than her whole apartment.
After a tour of the interior, she stood on the patio in the autumn sunlight in a pair of shorts, something she would have never been able to do in New Jersey. Every day seemed to get better than the last, assuming she could keep the intrusive thoughts about Kevin away. And also assuming she could figure out what she was supposed to do about Bob and the growing collection of feelings she seemed to have for him.
"You have to hear what happened in my Differential Equations lecture on Friday afternoon," her friend was saying as they stood near the new grill that would soon be the centerpiece of the afternoon. "You won't even believe it."
Anna listened for a minute to the wild story, bursting into laughter when she learned how her friend thought she was going to have to call the fire department while she was teaching. Then she saw him. Bob was here with his tidy hair and his adorable glasses and his big hands, and like always her brain filled up with the beautiful poetry she loved so much. Somehow it seemed to go together with him. Those stunning words matched the way he made her feel.
She had to bite her lip in an attempt to calm herself down. "Hey, Bob," she managed to say as his cheeks flushed pink.
"Anna."
Oh, she was a mess. She thought about him way too frequently, even taking the time to compile the titles of some books she had read and loved, convincing herself he might like some of them too. "I came up with a few, slightly more obscure book recommendations for you. I was thinking maybe we could go back to the bookstore and look for some of them that I don't currently own? I might be fun to-"
But she stopped mid sentence when she heard some excited chatter behind Bob, and then a woman came running out through the back door. A beautiful woman. Calling his name. Jumping into his arms. Anna was treated to the sight of the woman's lips brushing against Bob's cheek while he held onto her like he was just reunited with the only person he ever cared about. She had to watch as this other woman ran her fingers gently along his skin in exactly the way Anna fantasized about. And when she looked around, nobody seemed concerned by this turn of events, rather they all acted like it was perfectly normal that Bob and this woman were whispering intimately to each other.
Then Anna heard her say, "Now we can pick up where we left off before my deployment."
Oh. Well. There was a sour taste in her mouth as she took a step backwards as the rest of the group greeted this mystery woman. Anna was going to have to have words with Advanced Calculus and Advanced Physics after this. Maybe they tried to set her up with Bob, because they didn't like this other woman? That idea vaporized as soon as she saw Jessica embrace her with a bright smile on her face.
Anna felt like her chest was growing tighter by the second, and then Jessica started to pull the pretty brunette toward her. "You have to come meet the newest faculty member from the English department! Dr. Anna Webber."
The woman looked her up and down with dark, appraising eyes and a little smirk set firmly on her lips. Then she stuck out her right hand and said, "I'm Natasha Trace."
The last thing Anna wanted to do right now was shake hands, but Jessica was looking at her with concern, probably wondering why she was just standing there. "It's a pleasure," Anna said with as much conviction as she could muster, shaking hands as briefly as she could.
"You teach at San Diego State too?" Natasha asked as her smirk bloomed into a bigger smile. When Anna nodded, she laughed and added, "What the hell do they put in the water at that school?"
Jessica was beaming now as she said, "Anna gives book recommendations to Bob all the time."
"Really? Is that so?" Natasha asked, still eyeing Anna like a predator would their prey, when Bob appeared with two cans of ginger ale. He gave one to Natasha and then tried to hand the other one to Anna as Natasha said, "I actually read a phenomenal book last month, Bob. I'll write down the title for you."
He kind of smiled, still holding out the other can toward Anna who felt like she was on the verge of screaming. "No. Thank you," she told him, taking a few steps away as she clocked the hurt expression on his face. "I don't want any."
The uncomfortable feeling was overtaking Anna's whole body now when Natasha leaned a little closer to Bob and softly muttered, "Let me guess... you have a little crush? This happened in my absence?"
Anna turned and went inside, searching for the bathroom she'd seen on the house tour. That woman was mocking her. Anna didn't want to hear any more of that conversation, because it was making her skin crawl. And worse still, she was finally able to identify this feeling as she closed and locked the door and leaned on the sink vanity.
Jealousy.Â
She was more jealous of this petite brunette who seemed to think Bob's personal space was hers for the taking than she ever was about Kevin and Alyssa. She was beside herself at the idea of another woman giving Bob book recommendations and making fun of his stupid little crush on her.
This was exactly why she should have never let herself have feelings. When she looked in the mirror, she saw tears in her eyes. "Shit," she whispered. She didn't have a car, so she couldn't just discreetly leave. Plus she'd been looking forward to eating something other than one of her sad sandwiches for days.
The jealousy gave way to anger as she wiped her eyes with a tissue and dropped it in the trash can. Her new friends invited her here, and she was going to stay. She wasn't going to let her feelings for Bob Floyd dictate her mood or what she felt she was allowed to do. She wasn't going to let another man run her life like that ever again.
With her head held high, she walked back outside, making it a point to avoid Bob and Natasha at all costs. She willingly had a thirty minute conversation with Jake and Mickey about the Marvel Cinematic Universe as an excuse to keep her distance. Then she and Bradley discussed the extensive musical catalogue of the Grateful Dead while she slowly sipped a beer to try to take the edge off. Then he turned on the grill, and the smell of food cooking had her excited enough that it was becoming easier and easier to ignore Bob.
When she accidentally looked his way, he was already eyeing her with a confused expression. She could pretend all day long that she didn't care what he thought and that she wasn't jealous at all. She could be so stubborn about this. At least all they had between them was that one awkward, fumbled kiss in his truck. It wasn't like she'd slept with him before he ditched her for the much better looking Natasha.
She was still doing a fine job of ignoring both of them when Bradley announced that dinner was ready. Anna took a plate of food and scooted all the way to the end of the rectangular patio table, snagging the spot across from Jessica. She was willing to talk about anything right now, even her friend's physics curriculum that she could barely comprehend, but then Bob was right next to her.
"Mind if I sit here?" he asked cautiously, setting his plate next to hers. Anna just shrugged, and then she was enveloped in his clean scent as he eased himself down in the seat with his knee hitting her thigh. She quickly crossed her legs before scooting her chair a few inches to the side away from his. "Are you okay?"
Anna almost laughed as Natasha found a spot on the other side of the table. "I'm just fine," she said before taking a huge bite of her burger and avoiding looking at either of them.
"Right," Bob whispered, frowning down toward his plate as she gave him side eye. "I just... feel like I did something to upset you."
Anna shook her head, and when she was done chewing the delicious food, she said, "Not at all. You're free to make the decisions you want to make. And I'm free to keep my books to myself since you've got other ones now."
Bob looked at her and asked, "What's that supposed to mean?"Â
But Anna was well on her way to starting a conversation with Jessica that could probably last for hours. She ignored him as she asked, "Hey, Jess, what's up with that physics professor who just started wearing a toupee?"
"Dr. Leeland!" she screeched before launching into an animated conversation on the topic of her colleague's hair piece just as expected.
------------------------
Bob was so confused. He had been about to jump at the chance to hang out at the bookstore in North Park with Anna when Natasha arrived. At that point, he honestly thought this was going to be the best day he'd had in a while. Anna seemed happy to see him, and one of his best friends was finally home from deployment. But as soon as that thought entered his mind, Anna started acting like she wanted nothing to do with him. So much so that she asked Jess about some guy's fake hair? Bob sat there and listened to the conversation while he ate, trying to interject, but Anna just wasn't having it. She had even rejected his ginger ale.
What the hell did he do wrong? All he wanted to do was talk to her about books and look at her freckles. She was sitting right next to him, but he may as well have been on Jupiter with the way she seemed convinced that he wasn't even there at all.
As everyone started to finish eating, Bob washed his food down with the rest of his ginger ale. Maybe he should just head home early. He'd be spending all week at work with Nat, so it wasn't like he was going to miss out on much there. And being around Anna when she wasn't even looking at him made him feel like an idiot for secretly writing poems about her. He sat at the table alone for an extra minute with his head cradled in his hands, then he took his trash inside the house.
Of course Anna was the only other person in the kitchen, helpfully washing the grilling utensils and other things Bradley left in the sink. She glanced his way briefly before continuing with her task, and Bob headed for the trash can. He had the perfect view of the freckles on the backs of her thighs, but he didn't feel like he should be looking now. He stood quietly for a few seconds before deciding that he'd give this one last try before heading out.
"Anna," he said just loud enough that he knew she could hear him over the running water. "Can we talk? I just feel like I did something to upset you? When you started to invite me to the bookstore, I was going to say yes. Obviously I'd love to go with-"
She looked at him over her shoulder, and he went silent at her glare. "Why don't you just go with Natasha instead?"
His brow furrowed in confusion. "That's not the kind of thing she and I usually do together."
"Oh?" she asked, her voice dripping with something that made Bob's skin tingle with goosebumps. "Does she usually recommend books while you're out to dinner? Or do you take her to see her favorite movies?"Â
She turned off the water and faced him without bothering to dry her hands. His lips parted as he watched the furious looking blush that crept along her chest, up her neck, and to her cheeks.Â
"I don't really do those things with her either," he said slowly, trying to puzzle his way through this. She sounded almost jealous of Nat, but that couldn't be. That didn't make any sense at all. Anna made it clear she didn't want to be with him.
"Well, you're free to do whatever you want, Bob," she said with a shrug, chin held high. "This is why we're just friends. You've already got plenty of women to choose from, like Suzanne and Natasha, and I'm not about to get caught up in another attractive man who seems too good to be true."
She started to duck past him, but Bob blocked her path. "Whoa, whoa! No, you've got it all wrong." She doubled back the other way, but he stepped to the side until she bumped into him. "Suzanne is my elderly neighbor. And Natasha and I are friends," he said quickly, and he was rewarded with Anna's brown eyes snapping up to meet his. "I've known her for years. She's the pilot I usually fly with."
Anna took one stumbling step backwards toward the sink. Her teeth sank into her lip like earlier before she whispered, "Oh." She swallowed hard, drawing Bob's gaze back to the freckles on her neck as her blush grew deeper. "So you're not... into her?"
His voice sounded deep even to his own ears as he promised, "Not even slightly. Not like I'm into you."
The kitchen went so silent that Bob could hear laughter filtering from the patio through the open door, and Anna's expression softened as she took a tiny step forward. Then another one. Then one more before she was launching herself into his arms. Bob could feel her damp hands in his hair as their lips met, and it was nothing like the way they kissed in his truck. She wasn't tentative, and he didn't pull away as she kissed him harder. This time her body was pressed to his, and she moaned softly when he let his hands settle on her hips.
Anna coaxed him impossibly closer with her fingers in his hair and on the back of his neck, and soon he had her pinned against the edge of the counter. He could feel denim rubbing against denim as she parted her lips and wiggled slowly against him. When Bob swiped his tongue along her bottom lip, Anna let him taste her before her lips drifted along to his neck.
"Fuck," he grunted, squeezing her hips in his hands as his index finger met the soft skin of her lower back. She was sucking gently on the spot just to the left of his Adam's apple, and there was no way she couldn't feel how hard he was getting for her right now.
Those burgundy fingernails were scraping gently along his scalp as he rolled his hips one time against her body. When Anna licked his neck, he forced himself to ask the question that was fluttering around the peripheral of his aroused brain. "Are you going to tell me this is another mistake? Like that night in my truck?"
Anna pulled her lips away from his pulse point long enough to whisper, "It wasn't even a mistake last time. I just couldn't help myself."
Then Bob kissed her lips until she was clinging to him with her back arched against the counter and her hips held tightly in his hands. When he could tell someone was coming inside, he pulled himself away, panting as she tried to chase him for more. He could see the questioning look on her face as he stepped aside just before Mickey and Jake walked inside, arguing about who ate the last hot dog.
Anna turned back toward the sink as she blushed, and Bob was aching to kiss her again. Dying to confirm that she wasn't going to write him off again. He cleared his throat and asked, "Will you let me drive you home later?"
Bob heard her soft laugh and whispered, "Yes." Then with a smile, he took the last can of ginger ale from the refrigerator and set it on the counter next to her. She looked up at him, eyes filled with need as he excused himself back out to the patio where he started to count down the minutes until he could suggest it was late enough to leave.
---------------------------
Anna, you are living the dream, baby! Let him love you the way he wants to! And once again, in Natasha we trust. Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls
PART 8
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#bob floyd x oc#robert bob floyd x oc#robert bob floyd#bob floyd#bob floyd imagine#robert floyd imagine#bob floyd fic#bob floyd fanfiction#robert floyd x oc#robert floyd fanfiction#robert floyd fic#robert floyd#top gun imagine#top gun maverick imagine#top gun fanfiction#top gun maverick fanfiction#roosterforme#covering the classics
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âËŕżâ・ ďž âď¸ď˝Ą â・little navigation post!! ŕ¸
á¨ŕ¸
â§ď˝Ą â・ ďž âž ďž ď˝Ą â
°â.ŕłŕż*''knee-deep in the water" comic tags! â๨ŕ§ËâĄË ࣪
comic pages and aaaall of the art + sketches!
salamath - "mother said im allowed to have this 2 knives"
shas-hara - big bird with a reputation of hunting people for sport
narine - keeps dodging bullets but would prefer to catch them with a head a couple of times
kuyan - avoided responsibilities by pretending to be dead (surprise, it works) Â
ayasha - can successfully sell winter jacket in +40C
sino - emo boi who couldnt be fixed
ketla - "bi" in "bipolar"
tiisha - "please lord im only 7" (1/2 main character!)
yata - winks at you but only when you cant notice (2/2 main character!)
°â.ŕłŕż*:little faq + about the blog + fanart tags! °ââ.ŕłŕż*:
ââ
á˘..á˘â so, what im doing here?
im working on the ࣪ Ö´ÖśÖ¸âž. knee-deep in the waterË ŕłâď˝ĄË comic!!
oc characters you can find in this blog are mostly all from there, and if not - they are tagged by related fandom!Â
â á˘. ĚŤ .ᢠâ how's the drawing process for comic going?
by now i finished half of chapter one, and finished the intro! as soon as it is done i'll start to post pages here and on the dedicated site once-twice a week! script is already almost finished too!
â á˘. ĚŤ .â
ᢠâ do i still make fanart?
yes of course, just less often than before!Â
i was most active in bg3, tes, elden ring, dishonored and tma fandoms, but now im head and shoulders deep in datv!!Â
âᢠââş âĚŤââš á˘â do i take commissions?
âalmost throughout the whole year! so feel free to send an email on [email protected] - there's 100% chance i'll be free and able to work with you!Â
ââá˘. ĚŤ.á˘â where can you see commission information?Â
on my carrrd!
૮â'˜¡ . ⢠â
âá am i open to work on an art trade?
yes!!
âĄę°áľŕźáľâ
ęą can i do drawings from ask-prompts?
very rarely, when im in the mood!
âá˘. ŕź .á˘â do i make speedpaints?
even more rarely than prompts, but you can find some in the tags!
âáľ.Ë.áľâ what software do i use? which brushes?
photoshop 2020 + kyle t. webster dry media brushes!
âá˘._.á˘ââĄŕź do i sell prints?
nope! im that boring zero-waste person + i live in a country where most related us/european sites are blocked or simply not working without paypal!
°ââ.ŕłŕż*:シa little about the artist thingy! °ââ.ŕłŕż*:シ
if you'd want to support my work - i have boosty (and soon hopefully gonna have a patreon!)Â Â where i post speedpaints, early access to pages, sketches and all that!
thank you so much for reading and please dont hesitate to ask stuff if you'll have any questions! âĄ
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