#mother fucker ”Would you rather fight 100 duck sized horses or one horse sized duck?”

[xanthicantag]

do all the asks scrub

you have truly mastered all i have to teach and reached the rank scrub lord

We got D for Darren, IT for inktree, TE for scary terry, G for garramoosh, F for fellos and UN for unfaceable

1. How many dead parents do they have?

D: 2!IT: 0!!TE: 5!G: a whole deadass clanF: A whole mess of dead family poor kidUN: she technically killed her own father so like

2. How good are they at tongue twisters?Except for Darren, BAD

3. Biggest regret?D:Losing friendship powerIT: the lose of boyfriends 1-6TE: not killing more peopleG: Letting all his friends and family die and having to live with the regret he couldn’t avenge them and then took up the mantle of those who slew themF: Letting the clan of @purplewombat14481​ ‘s character die, he thought no one else would vote for the kidUN: listening to her friends and not ripping that Darrus guy in half

4. Are they formally trained or have they gone through a more organic learning experience for their skillset?

D: No training just a lot of the street lifeIT: All the fucking goddamn trainingTE: he’s a damn good murder sorcerer is what he isG: as much training as a paladin bugbear could get?F: Not as trained as Inky but he was trained real goodUN: ex military baby, and also a naruto like training period

5. If they could hang out with one famous person in 18th century American History, who would they want to hang out with?

None of them would last 5 minutes without killing them, except maybe Inktree, she’s a smart girl

6. What’s their theme song?

D: It’s a hard knock lifeIT: The Killing Type -Amanda PalmerTE: Young and a Menace - FOBG: Believer - Imagine Dragons or Every Kesha songF: Praying - KeshaUN: The Wolves - JJ & the pillars

7. What fictional character are they most like? Was this an intentional or accidental influence?

fukc dude, Garamoosh is kinda like the man of lamancha?

8. Paper or plastic?

all paper all the way

9. What’s their dump stat?

D: StrengthIT: Charisma (she’s not a good talker)TE: I don’t remember I think he might have busted stats tbhG: It was INT before he got a 19 in thatF: His cunning was bad? (this was for dragon age dnd)UN: Int and Dex, she was the strongest ranger

10. What’s their best stat?

D, IT, TE, G: DEX (also INT for IT and CHA for D and TE)F & UN: They are ripped as fucking hell.

11. What is their favorite anime?D & UN: NarutoF: Neon GenesisTE: High death animeG: he loves that slice of life anime about the big guy who finds love, it really gets to him as a big guy who’s just looking to have a family

12. What’s their favorite beverage?All but G: AlchoholG: He drinks water since it’s holy

13. If they can use magic, what’s their favorite spell?D: Burning handsIT: Booming blade or Magic MissileTE: Hellish Rebuke (I love tieflings btws)G: Divine smite (and shield, and find steed, he loves that horse, and magic, he’s a giver really)F: He likes his big hand grabby spellUN: Goodberry or passwithout trace, Hunters mark had it’s day in the light one time

14. Most heroic thing they have ever done?D: Tried to help someone in their time of need, that guy was a piece of shitIT: Saves the rest of the party, every time, always, she is tired of it, she wants restTE: Murder is bad and he is only good at thatG: he is techincally stopping a bunch of evil cults from ending the world, and murdered a slaver, it was dopeF: Saved a party memebers child, but also let a whole clan die so it kinda wasn’t so greatUN: Stopped a genocide and and punched a god

15. Most despicable thing they have ever done?D:He got over zealous and ripped a guys head off for style points after he surrendered, scared the rest of the partyIT: Techincally breaking out of jail is illegal but she doesn’t follow lawsTE: he is a murderer, like, really, he killed the other orphans, who does thatG: He techincally may have broken his oath once or twice, but it’s for good and he’s smater than religion now so no one can stop himF: see all times i mention those dead elvesUN: She kind of worked for a totalitarian order of assholes for a while

16. Are they a hero or a supporting protagonist?D: He wants to shine as a true hero with a heart of gold, but he’s really evil and is bad at being goodIT: she just wants some fuck and some sleep, she would gladly not be any whereTE: noG: That party is full of ridiculous hero backstoriesF: same as GUN: she was really stubborn but also didn’t really want to be front and center

17. What’s their favorite food?All non IT: any foodTE: The spider meat (the underdark is making her crazy)

18. Would they rather fight a hundred duck-sized horses, or one horse-sized duck?100 small horses, they are all good at aoe

19. They have to go live on a deserted island. They can take one thing and one person. What do they take?Alchohol for all non-GG: his family

20. Are they religious? If so, what god or gods do they serve?G: The golden Hog who saved him from death at the hands of a paladinF: The maker kindaNone for the rest

21. How did they become an adventurer?D: by accidentIT: she was arrested and said no i’m not staying hereTE: he’s really notG: the people needed himF: he wanted to save his brotherUN: she woke up in a basement and found a new family, a better one

22. Most amazing monster they have ever killed or helped kill?D: a battalionIT: shadow demon wizard fusionTE: i don’t even remember he needed to relaxG: a lot of high-powered high-ranking cultists, and a dragonF: Some hot guy UN: a fake god and then technically a real god 

23. Thoughts on death?BAD

24. Do they have any interesting skills?D: can pickpocket stuff with a whip (says he can pick a lock with it but everyone knows he just breaks the door down)G: has skin with AC 20UN: can pull rank sometimes

25. Favorite animal?IT: She really loves owlsD and TE: their pets ratG: HogsUN: her sweet dogF: Mabaris

26. Expansion of civilization or the preservation of nature?All of them except Fellos are for nature

27. They’re at a tavern. They bump into a big burly angry drunk with a combative attitude. What happens?That fucker get’s his ass beat is what happens (or eviscerated by D or TE) 

28. What do they do between quests?G: tries to raise his boy (another player)D: hunts a bastard manTE: his never not doing murderF: finding his brother (plot twist he found him it was awkward) or learning more about his friendsUN: systematically killing every member of the order she used to work for, or having a nice day with her doh

29. Biggest positive and negative influences on their life and development?D: himself and his murdery tendencies are bad, his friends were goodTE: HIMSELF, not goodIT: the other gnome and druid is the only not negative influence, everyone else is a negativeG: He loves everyone, until their evilF: His mother was his only big role model/ parent, and he is trying to do good to be that kind of figure for his brother, but the demon who lives in his brain (IS THE BEST INFLUENCE SHOUT OUT TO MY BOY)

30. Would they smooch a ghost?

100% YES