#most /can't/ talk. to anyone. and can only express themselves non-verbally

[ranticore]

Oh I have more questions! How do Harpies sound? Both when talking normally and trying to speak a human language. And how do humans sound when trying to speak harpy?

Sorry I fell asleep again anyway the raptor harpies in human flocks vocalise from their syrinx which is at the base of their neck and often their tongue is fully just not involved with vocalising at all. So they can quite easily talk with their mouth mostly shut and not moving which humans can find disconcerting. The sound of speech is surprisingly guttural and metallic, it sounds raspy and can often be interspersed with ear-splitting loud clicks and fire-alarm noises. In general harpy flocks are very noisy, too noisy for an average human to really enjoy. For distance communication they employ shrieks and screams, to threaten they hiss. When speaking human language they struggle with some sounds which would require a human tongue to produce ("th" for example) and the words sound spiky and hard instead of soft.

There's not a single human in this setting who's bothered trying to learn a word of any of the hundreds of harpy languages, aside from maybe scholars but even then idk. The nature of humans' relationship with harpies is exploitative; one bends to the other. Humans see no need to learn

[dojae-huh]

I saw a recent ask and got curious and went back to read what everyone was discussing and saw people mention TaeTen. I wanna put aside any speculation of anyone's sexuality to say something. Do you trust that what we see on camera is everything about their lives? Because it isn't. The polaroid was a mistake. Ten never *showed* it. It was caught by fans in the background of a very good 4k cam. It was a private part of his space that he didn't realize he filmed(and never made that mistake again), where pictures of his family were, along with a Gengar figurine right next to it (Taeyong has posed with a Gengar recently and Gengar-Kitty art). Ten is a private person. Also, you say he only talks about Johnny. Since when? When was the last time he did? Cricket noises. And if Ten did like Johnny more than a friend, would he have mentioned him as a "bro" best friend in the past? (Always "bro" just like he talks about Mark). Or would he have kept it a secret? There is a good reason TaeTen is the biggest Ten pairing in Thailand, Ten's homeland where his most dedicated fanbase is. They pay more attention to Ten and how others and SM treat him than anyone else. They keep closer tabs on him than us. They know more than us. Ten has multiple friends he's never seen interact or mention much. And that's true for all neos. Taeyong and Yuta are very close friends but the fandom narrative is DoTae are the besties, when it's Yuta who kept close to Taeyong while they toured LATAM. Who entertains him enough to pose with Taeyong shirtless and probably took the pics so Taeyong could show off his new tattoo of two cranes, an animal who form long monogamous relationships with their mates. Taeyong, who also has a tattoo in Thai. Anyway, no neo owe us disclosure of their personal relationship details. And FYI, Ten recently picked Taeyong as the member he has most chemistry with. But nothing TaeTen does ever trend much outside of Thai Twitter, except when they perform BDS. They are a small ship and that's why people who aren't invested in both of them don't know anything about them. NCITY is stuck with 2016-2020 NCT interactions and don't seem to realize neos are people who grow and change. Taeyong is not some little helpless bubu who was to be controlled, he literally never said that. He's almost 28, a grown man, who tells us through his music he's a monogamous person. When people talk like Taeyong in this tired ass narrative like he's a tiny defenseless twink I just know they don't pay any attention to his art and self-expression. It doesn't feel like anyone here can have any meaningful conversation about Taeyong or Ten as individuals because not everyone is up to date. Much less a conversation about TaeTen or their sexuality. It's just not an informed conversation that people are having.

You are right to say that there is life behind the cameras and that the relationships portrayed before the camera are not always exactly how they are in reality. Idols need to demonstrate good relationships, be able to work together even if there is tension, or, other way around, pretend they are not as close as behind the scenes.

However, another member of the same group is not a non-celebrity friend. And bts videos and variety shows are not scripted controlled interviews. Idols are singers and dancers, not actors, they will inevitably betray a lot of things about their relationships through body language, verbal slip ups, the way other members react to situations and jokes, etc. Taeyong especially is a person who isn't good with keeping his composure (his giggles when neos flirt with him or he needs to hug Doyoung) or controlling his body (his hands always need to occupy themselves with clothes or poke a neighbour). That's why I asked anons who advocated for TaeTen or Taeyong being gay to give me supportive evidence (interactions, interviews). Toys and clothes can't be independant arguments, only supplementary material.

A TaeTen photograph can mean Ten's one-sided crush. Why is it interpreted as a photo of lovers? Gengar is a Pokemon. Taeyong can like this pokemon, Ten could have introduced the pokemon to Tae and persuade him to like it or inspire him to take pictures of it as "hey, this figurine reminds me of you, friend". Again, it is not a 2+2=4 "they are in love".

Where did I say Ten only talks about Johnny? I said when NCT meet for projects, we see more of JohnTen than TaeTen.

TaeTen promoted in Thailand with a song in Thai alone. When Ten was in U at the beginning, neos did several NCT Life-s in Thailand (Bangkok and Chiangmai), they performed together as Rookies, they had brand deals. TaeTen is in Super M. Taeyong is one of the most popular neo. There can be many reasons why TaeTen is the most popular Ten ship in Thailand.

DoTae are besties. It's not fanon. There is no reason for Taeyong to ask Doyoung to get into the same retirement home with him when they get old. And there is no reason for Doyoung to cry about this offer. TaeYu only recently became closer again. Body language doesn't lie. You can tell who is closer to whom simply observing relationships over the years and not cherry-picking individual events. And Taeyong has no reason to lie about his friends either. DoTae were roommates during Neo City tour a lot. So why does the same argument of "spending time together" doesn't apply to them?

Cranes mean longevity, purity and peace in Korea. Johnny and Taeyong both have swallow tattoos, which JohnTae shippers interpreted the same way you did with cranes and TaeTen.

Taeyong has a tattoo of a bunny with a house. And a tattoo of his dead dog. Is Ten a bunny? Is a dog a lover?

This is the tattoo you are talking about. It can be number "6" in Thai script, or it can be entirely something else. The second symbol is not a Thai number or a letter. You didn't even investigate how the tattoo looked like, just latched on the "in Thai language". Mind you, the squiggles are beside a tattoo of a swallow, and Ten is "kingfisher".

You are talking about informed conversation but mention the same "signs of TaeTen" that anons advocating for TaeTen brought up in the past. Which, I think, is a mistake.

Ten is in WayV, however, Taeyong is in 127. A profound change in him or his relationship with Ten, will have a ripple effect on his relationships with other 127 neos (Johnny-Ten-Tae dynamic, for example). The same way JaeDo getting together had a huge effect on DoTae and JaeYong and brought a change in Yuta and made Woo stop with his "confident gay" game towards Doyoung.

I don't remember anyone saying here "little helpless bubu", it's some fanon you bring from the fandom and project on readers here.

[autimind]

Autistics, flip the conversation!

Almost all of the time, people talk about us and over us. Especially since the thrice-cursed American juggernaut AutismSpeaks has hijacked the conversation basically right at the point that reliable information about autism became available. Before that, of course, the pathological model existed and it is still strong in our societies.

The pathological model sees autism as a disorder, describes autism as nothing more than a list of debilitating deficits and is nothing more than the most flimsy superficial look at autism as it looks only and exclusively at behahiour. Such is well-known to all #ActuallyAutistics.

The pathological model is genuinely toxic. As an example: if an autistic says something and a neurotypical person misunderstands then the autistic has a deficit in communication, can't express their meaning well. If the NT person says something and the autistic doesn't understand then they are mind-blind or have a deficit in non-verbal communication or something or other. This toxic lense through which society looks at us always puts the burden of building understanding on us, at the same time writing us off as less-than.

Not all of us are able or even willing to jump on the barricade again and again and fight to be heard. I know I am certainly no activist. I have a hard time enough holding down a marriage and a job as well as some semblance of a social life. Still, there is a lot we can do, a number of low-key activities that we can undertake to help allistic outsiders understand and perhaps become allies.

Almost everything people think they know about autism, they have heard from non-autistic people.

Almost everything people think they know about autism, they have heard from non-autistic people.

That's not an error. I just wanted you to read that twice. Imagine if only people with a physical disability were just ignored and talked over. (Well, to be sure, that does happen..)

Imagine if women could not talk about their lived experience because either they behaved in a masculine way (high-functioning) and so couldn't possibly understand about real women or they behaved in a feminine way (low-functioning) and so had no understanding or opinions anyway. That would be completely unacceptable to basically anyone in today's society.

Imagine if a character in a movie said to another "That's mighty white of you." Cringe, right? Sure, you should cringe.

Still, I'm told I'm a high-functioning person-with-autism. It is not a compliment, people!

Flipping the conversation

Allistic folk are often enough enamoured of 'thinking outside the box' and flip-thinking. They mean creatively rephrasing some well-known concept in order to see it in a different light. Well, let's do that. Let's flip-think about autism.

troublesome behaviour Troublesome to whom? Inconvenient for whom? Why can't these flexible neurotypical people just accept that some express themselves differently?

rigid thinking I already wrote about this. Isn't it rigid to demand other express themselves exactly like you do down to the minutest detail or you'll feel free to just dismiss them as weird, a freak, stupid? Because that is what allistic people do constantly, without even thinking about it.

It is not rigid thinking to hold on to your ideals, like justice or fairness. Far too often, not willing to compromise on these or not willing to lie even is called inflexible or rigid. I have been told again and again that I need to be more business-oriented because I follow the legalities like I'm supposed to. That is unethical, not flexible.

stereotypical interests and hyperfocus What is stereotypical anyway? What does that mean? I know people who can name every single soccer team in multiple competitions along with their most recent game outcomes and a fairly well developed statistical overview of what needs to happen for any one of a number of competitors to win the whole series. This is somehow normal. I can spend over twenty minutes talking about just Fermat's last theorem and its background, not even going into the mathematics. If I am lucky, this is called 'quirky'.

Sure enough if you tell me about your job at a party, I will ask questions and then more questions and will show you that I have understood your answers. Sure enough I can remain focus on my work or on a hobby for hours, forgetting to eat.

From my view, non-autistics are seldom really interested in anything, flutter around touching this or that subject, never really engaging with anything and basically just talk to be talking.

taking language literally This is a bit of a canard as almost none of us really do this, especially not in adulthood. Still, if you are focused on the words that someone speaks, it can be challenging to find out what they actually meant.

Still, why do they make everyone jump through hoops trying to divine one another's meaning? It is not as if allistic people can do this faultlessly; they just expect themselves to be right. This creates any amount of conflicts and confusion among basically everyone.

Why not say what you mean and mean what you say? If I ask a factual question, I want to know the answer. I will probably decide something based on the answer. I am not blaming or accusing anyone. If I mean to then I will say that and use the words blame or accuse. Why this constant searching for subtext and ephemeral meaning 'between the lines'?

Allistic people can say things like 'oh, you don't have to bring me anything' with a straight face and/or a friendly smile and then act offended when you don't bring them anything. You can explain to me that I have a deficit in non-verbal communication until you're blue in the face but I call that lying. Lying is bad.

I also usually still know what you said more than half a year ago on some point of policy and yes, I will confront you with your earlier decision if you suddenly act as if you meant the opposite all along. You are entirely free to call this rude. Be my guest.

inflexible when it comes to change, sticks to routines Well, sure. If I got a euro for every time I hear one of my allistic colleagues say that they need coffee right away before they are able to function I would be a rich man indeed. We all have our routines. Allistic routines are invisible to society because they are deemed normal.

What usually happens is that someone has had a whole thought process in their own mind that resulted in a change of plans and then just dumps the conclusion on me. I am then expected to right away see how obviously better that new choice is in that very moment and happily go along with it. They simply don't see that I didn't share their whole mental process. And we are called mind blind!

Austistics need a reason. We generally don't do authority or team-playing. Then again, if you stop me and explain in a few words why there needs to be a change of plans and give me a couple of seconds to process, I'll support you most of the time. Allistic people refusing to give us those few seconds are the inflexible ones, the low-empathy types in this case.

And so on and so forth. This is not a commercial for the aspie supremacy. Autistic people can certainly be inflexible or rigid and we can obsess over things to the exclusion of all else. All that is true. However, there are always (at least) two parties to communication and it doesn't do to always blame autistics for everything.

So speak up for yourself. Flip the conversation when some ill-informed acquaintance starts talking at you about autism.

They should speak with you.