#moon in the 12 houses through the eyes of god

[gardenofedenedenp]

♡Moon Throughout The 12 Houses From God's Eyes♡

Moon in the First House👑

Very happy people with a youthful disposition, would benefit from a career in therapy, counseling, or massage therapy.

Big, bright pretty eyes and a vigorous heart, this is the person you want by your side in a fight. In peace. In clarity and in joy.

The perfect example of "God's favorite."

♡♡

Moon in the Second House🙌🏾

It is a requirement to be mindful when it comes to spending finances, solely based on the need to "feel good."

A reminder to the moon in the 2nd House person, is "Use STRONG discernment when is comes to differentiating what is EMOTIONS VS A DOWNLOAD."

♡♡

Moon in the 3rd House💍

Bright personality, with a smart mouth. And attitude that is both endearing and sassy.

Most people can't stand a know-it-all with a consistent smug look of understanding and amusement on their face. But Moon in the 3rd house person just makes it look so Damm good.

♡♡

Moon in the 4th House🤣

A very scary mommy who always has a very full belly. This person has quite the appetite. For love, food, and attire from places like Marshall's and TJMaxx.

They truly enjoy the comfort of it all.

Can be very dangerous when upset. Proceed with caution.

♡♡

Moon in the Fifth House🩷

Ice cream, and billy goats. Ice cream and Billy goats.

Seems random? That's Because the moon in the 5th house IS RANDOM.

Always seems to have some money in their pocket. Veey lucrative people because their heart is always in the right place.

Finance advice for yall: BE HAPPY . if your at work and miserable, you will be broke. I will accept your "Thanks In Advance."

♡♡

Moon in the Sixth House😎

"The mom friend." "The work bestie." Who will ghost your a$$. If you so much AS DARE TO CROSS THEIR BOUNDARIES.

Similar to moon in 4th, this pookie has temper.

Except they will verbally decimate you, immediately to your face, because they can't miss their yoga class at 3:15pm because they wasted it on ENDING your reputation.

(Moon in 4th has alot of time on their hands, because they mastered time management at age 12 and will kill you. Slowly. Deliberately. And will celebrate with their elevated ancestors before the plans morph into 3d motion😳)

♡♡

Moon in the Seventh House💸

Omg. So many girlfriends. Or boyfriends. Depending on your gender.

Be careful with your boundaries. Too many soul ties makes for a unfit belly, and g3nitalia.

Mostly very polite and sociable, but has a detached air to them that they can sometimes be unaware of. Which can lead to heartbreak. TO either themselves or the 3rd party.

♡♡

Moon in the Eighth House🎇

BIG GOD. BIG BAG. GOTT A BIG GOD

, WHO GAVE EM A BIG, BIG, BIG BAG

They are not sharing their money. Unless you are Jesus or their future spouse. Current boyfriend or girlfriend does not count. Neither does mama.

♡♡

Moon in the Ninth House💖

Probably is married with their husband or wife abroad somewhere.

Oh. You were their friend of 10 years and didn't know that they have already been married for 12 of those years WITH a baby on the way in Zimbabwe?

Oh..

♡♡

Moon in the Tenth House🚘

Money bags. Money bags with tears. Mr or Mrs Money bags with tears that TURN INTO gold.

And no, you can't come for their wedding. You bullied them in 8th grade.

♡♡

Moon in the Eleventh House💌

Oh my gosh, best friend of the MILLENNIUM AWARD. also they cook really well. And tend to have gorgeous feet. (This is coming from a goddess who does not care for rhe feet of others.

But I respect it.)

♡♡

Moon in the Twelfth House💋

Oh Em Gee. Super intimidating. In a Care-Bear kind of way.

No. I Will not elaborate on that.

♡♡♡♡♡

[rogueddie]

996 hours, 39 minutes and 12 seconds.

Gareth has had enough. It's been long enough. He's sick and tired of waiting- he's taking matters into his own hands. He can't wait any longer. It'll kill him.

"Oh, hey," Steve looks surprised when he opens the door. "Gareth. Uh, what are you-?"

"Are you home alone?"

"What? Yeah, but-"

He grabs Steve by the shoulders, turning him around and directing him into his house, kicking the door shut behind him. He walks them all the way to the kitchen and nudges Steve into one of the seats.

Gareth sits across from him, narrowing his eyes. "Are you a homophobe?"

"What? No!" Steve looks deeply offended at the question, before a more curious, understanding look takes over. "Wait, are you-?"

"No, I just need to make sure you're safe. You don't have a problem with any of that?"

"No, I don't. I'm not an asshole- not anymore, anyway."

Gareth glances at the clock.

996 hours, 42 minutes, 08 seconds.

"Alright... do you like Eddie?"

"What?"

"Eddie Munson. Do. You. Like. Him."

"That- I don't- what- what does that have to- to do with, like, anything?" Steve flushes, shifting uncomfortably.

That's a yes, Gareth thinks, nodding to himself.

"I'm going to send him over here in, like... two, maybe three, hours. He likes horror movies, salted popcorn and diet coke."

"I don't know what you mean."

Gareth sighs, rubbing his head as he glances at the clock again.

996 hours, 42 minutes, 58 seconds.

"I can't deal with his stupid pining anymore," he grabs Steves hands, giving him his best pleading look, hoping his desperation shows. "Just... try one date. Please, for the love of God, I won't survive another day listening to him ranting about your hair."

"What? Wait... does- does he... like me?"

Steves voice is so quiet, timid, it nearly makes Gareth falter. It sounds so much like his little sister, when she lets the cruel shit other kids say get to her.

"Don't let him know I told you, but... yeah. Yeah, Steve, he really likes you."

"Oh."

Gareth can't help but laugh at how starstruck he looks, eyes so wide and awed.

"Wait, what- what does he say about me? You said... my hair?"

"Alright, I'm taking that as a yes," Gareth quickly gets up, waving off Steves excited questions. "Two to three hours, Harrington!"

1,002 hours, 34 minutes, 58 seconds.

Eddie shoves Gareth out the way as soon as he opens the door, immediately starting to pace in his living room.

"You alright?"

"No!" Eddie screeches, eyes almost as wild as his hair. "Steve kissed me!"

"What? Dude, that's great!"

"I know! I just- fuck, I have to thank you for giving him the heads up that I was on the way with his VHS," Eddie grabs both of his hands. "He set up a pillow fort so we could watch Nightmare on Elm Street together. Gar, the movie scared him but he put it on because I like it and... fuck."

"So, it went well?"

"It was amazing."

They sit together, Eddie walking him through every little detail of their date. It just further proves that Steve more than earnt his romantic reputation.

It's also a relief to finally hear Eddie talking with so much joy, and love. Even just talking about Steve, he has a look like he thinks he hung the moon. His own personal sun.

"Hey," Gareth interrupts. "Congrats, man. You deserve this."

[prncessjaeger]

jennifer’s body ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

ღsypnosis:' pranking' your bestie gone wrong (right!)

ღan: heavily inspired by one of the best thrillers ever, happy halloween!!

ღcw: mentions of death and blood, semi-descriptive smut or sum idk (first time btw so don't laugh), finger-fucking, oral (fem to fem obvi), manipulative tactics used, semi coercion, cussing, everyone’s 18+, and uhh i think that's all.

the moon was full tonight, and the blood you thought you rinsed off with a hose was still coated on your hands. you took a good look at them and licked your fingers dry, then looked up seeing mikasa’s light being the only one off. huffing, you saw the ladder next laying on the back of the house, and groaned, knowing you had a full fear of heights, but huffed and moved it closer towards her window. “fuck i hope your window’s unlocked miks.”

when you reached to the top, you juggled with her window and ‘ahh’ed when it opened for you, “bingo.” you saw mikasa’s figure sleeping soundly and sighed, taking off your jackets and pants while also checking yourself out in the mirror. you snuck in the her bed quietly and laid for roughly 10 minutes waiting until she turned around and once she did, you saw her eyes peek slightly open looking directly in yours.

“hi.”

“AHHH WHAT THE HELL?!!” a blood-curdling scream roared from her lips. she ran to turn on her lights, wondering who was in her bed this late at night, “enough with the screaming mikasa, damn you’re such a cliche-”

“GET THE HELL OUT!” you saw her holding her chest with one hand and pointing towards the door with the other, the fear evidently shown on her face “but we always share your bed when we have slumber parties?” you could still see the anger on her face, "but i didn’t invite you over…?"

"oh my god, when's the last time you've physically invited me over? since we were what, 12? we're past that stage now..." mikasa huffed loudly to show that she's irritated but you noticed she let her guard down, so you slid over the bed towards her and hesitantly slid her glasses off, “calm down…I won’t bite...”

“tell that to jean-”

“watch it. he was hitting on you, you know i don’t like that.. besides, he was a little salty so you're not missing out...” she saw your eyes turn from flirty to irritation in 2 seconds but brushed it aside knowing you'd be back to normal in no time. she stared down at the shirt you wore, something that was definitely not owned in your closet, as she felt you run her hands through your hair,

“where’d you get that shirt?” you looked down at the shirt, smirking, “it makes my boobs look great, don’t they mika?” mikasa rolled her eyes at your redirection the conversation to something else and gave you a long hard look, a total comparison to the soft, lustful look in your eyes, “c’mere,” you grabbed her cheeks and pulled her into a small kiss, the feeling of her soft lips caressing her made her feel something she couldn’t put in words.

she hesitated at first, but because you were so persistent, she leaned back in and kissed you back, hard. her soft breaths exhaled slowly, feeling your tongue wrestle against hers. abruptly, you backed away and laid down flatly on her bed, silently inviting her with a distinct look in your eyes.

“y/n, this is…so wrong-”

“of course it’s not wrong, best friends kiss all the time! i mean, we’re still best friends, right?” you sat up to meet her eye as she sat on the bed, nodding at you slowly. “but i’ve never kissed anyone.”

“you mean to tell me you 'n eren never kissed? as long as you've both dated? or anyone??" she shyly shook her head no, “well now you have! so let’s get to learning, shall we?” mikasa still had a fearful look on her face and sighed, knowing you’d probably had better kissers before her, “what’s the long face? you’ll be fine, mika, trust me.” your eyes captivated her and saw them roll obnoxiously when you weren’t budging, “you know what, i’m gonna find someone else to kiss if you don’t-”

mikasa instantly feels a burst of confidence and shuts you up, kissing you more passionately. pushing you back on that bed and crawling on top of you, neither one of you broke the kiss not once. heavy moans and breaths came from you both and you moved your hands to push her down on your crotch area, feeling and kneading through her ass through her black thin night shorts. she tilted her head then moved her hands to your tits, massaging them softly which erupted a long whiny moan coming from your throat. “fuck you’re so hot,”

“am i?” your hand went down to cup her cunt, moving your fingers against her clothed clit slowly which made her hips stuttering against you, “fuck, d-don’t stop, please,”

“wasn’t planning on it,” you hastily pulled her pants off, deciding to keep her cute pink and white panties on instead since it complimented her skin…

…oh! and they were pink too.

you continued to rub her clit through her panties, feeling a wet patch starting to form and mikasa’s moans were perfect, something you’d want to hear forever. they were loud, but not too loud to travel from the room and wake up her grumpy ass mom, and they were sooo high pitched, contrasting from her deep voice. “‘ts feels sooo good, y/n, shit.”

“mhmmm…” you pulled her panties down with your teeth while keeping eye contact with her, and when your cold middle finger slowly slid in her cunt, she fell over continously moaning aloud, “aww fuck!”

flipping over so you're the one on top and her beneath you, you saw the tears threatening to spill from her eyes, thrusting your fingers inside of her and kissing along her neck, feeling the need for blood, but shook that thought out, wanting to keep giving your best friend the pleasure she definitely wasn't receiving from eren,

“tell me how it feels baby,” hearing your raspy voice, she felt like she wanted to cum right then and there.

you noticed mikasa leg shaking, the crescent shaped marks embedded in your arm from her sharp nails which piqued an interest in something, “you wanna cum?”

“yesss i wanna cum, please let me-!”

“if you don’t tell me how you feel, i can’t let you cum baby,” you could hear the irritation in her sigh, and you moved from her neck to her face, “b-but i alre-ready told you how i felt--OH FUCK!”

you pushed another finger inside of her, feeling her cunt squeeze your fingers which restricted your movements for a hot second, “relax, baby relax,” seeing-well more like feeling that she wasn’t letting up, you moved down to her glistening pussy, and licked a stripe up to her clit, feeling mikasa tremble under you.

continously thrusting your fingers, you began to eat her out simultaneously and mikasa felt like she was seeing stars. the feeling from your two fingers and your tongue was too much for her, and when you sucked her clit, she couln’t even warn you when she came, her wetness dripping all over your face and down her thighs…but you didn’t stop sucking and slurping, removing your fingers and stuck them insider of her mouth once mikasa sat up, overstimulation hitting her hard. “w-wait wait wait-.”

“why would i wait, mikasa? huh?” you looked up at her, seeing her drool all over your fingers, going down your arm. with a small bit of strength, she pushed your head back away from her, closing her legs which were still shaking from how hard she came. “woah…you’re so wet right now fuck.”you rubbed against her thighs wanting to pry them open and slurp her sopping pussy up all over again. “oh shut up,” you quirked one brow up, and smirked, waiting for her to put her guard down, and as soon as you saw her exhale slowly, you slid open her legs and attached your mouth to her lower lips once again, "hold on y/n, wait-" even though she was steadily telling you to stop, her hands continuously pushed your head further into her pussy. "right there, baby right thereee," she grabbed your hair and moved your face basically up and down against her cunt, her legs continuously spasming.

your hands went inside of your panties, flicking your fingers inside of your own gushing core and rubbing your thumb against your clit, as you licked and sucked onto her clit once again, "you're such a bitch for this, y/n,"

you stopped your motions, not liking her choice of wording and in comes a brilliant idea in your brain, an idea that could instantly make her lose this sudden attitude she had and use her mouth for something better.

you immediately pulled your panties down, pushing her laid back once again and sat right on top of her mouth, facing your back towards her, “let’s put this mouth to good use, hm? or are you too scared to do something,” mikasa couldn’t lie, you were acting real cocky and knew that she needed to do something to shut you up.

so, she grabbed your hips to plant your warm pussy fully agasint her mouth and she began copying the motions you did to her previously, feeling you scrunching up the ends her tank top, “ooh, for once, you really know what you-you’re doing, you’re taking me so well princess…” mikasa didn’t let your hips go, instead even tried to ground them further, and you were lowkey scared the fat of your ass was gonna suffocate her.

you moved your hips against her mouth and nose, feeling her tongue go flat, and since you were faced back towards her, she reached up with one hand and pushed you down to her cunt, and you knew what she wanted so you began licking and sucking her pussy again, feeling her moan against you. “mika this- fuck- that feels sooo good, keep going keep-” your hips kept grinding against her mouth, softly moaning against her sex.

funny enough, you got the sense that she was trying to overpower you, and you could not let that happen so you shakily hopped off her face and spread her legs wide open, fully connect your pussy on to hers, the feeling of your grinding ontop of her clit made mikasa see stars. “ohh my…goddddd,” you held her leg in the air, feeling the wetness slosh together, “i’m-’m gonna cum again, you’re so good-

“the best?”

“the best everrr…” you moved just a tad bit faster, her moans that were so pitchy, soft, and so loud, you had to cover her mouth, “you don’t want your mommy dearest coming in, do you?”

her head shook no, a tear rolled down her cheek and she felt like she was about to cum even hard than before, and suddenly she fell out, relaxing with a blissful look on her face, unlike you who was still chasing your well needed high after today’s…events and finally came down right on her cunt, letting out a loud gasp turned into whine…

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

now you both were laid out in only just a shirt, cuddle up together when mikasa suddenly woke up and jumped from you, “what the FUCK is happening with me?!”

“wow mika, i never knew you could say the f-bomb so much now,” you giggled at her, watching her pull her panties up fastly, “i-i- saw you, did w-we-we just-!”

“w-w-we fucked? yeah it’s too late for you to be all shocked now, especially when you did your tongue like-“

“oh my god SHUT UP- MMMFHG!!” your hand clasped against her mouth, “god calm down…” she removed her hands from her ears and stared real hard at the shirt you were wearing, furrowing her brows, “isn’t that..eren’s shirt?” “

”hm? this old thing?? it might be, why?” she ignored your giggles and hurriedly called eren’s cell, hearing it ring and ring and ring, “come on eren pick up baby please-”

“baby?” you jerked your head and muttered, seeing her call another number, “hi ms.carla, have you seen eren tonight?”

“uh, no he says he was meeting a girl from his class for a project…y/n i believe, you know her right?” the phone slid from mikasa’s hand and she saw your eyes widen just a bit, then saw your infamous smirk grace your features when she knoes you’ve done something- well more like feasted on someone, “s-sorry ms. carla i-i have to go..” she hung up the phone and finally noticed the small splotch of blood splattered on the side of your jaw, something she swore she didn’t see the entire night. you giggled at her fear-distruaght face, licking the remnants of her off your fingers,

“oops.’

ღan: omg i’ve been gone for a bit but school has its priorities- but that don’t even matter rn🎀

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

🎃⁀➷ 31 days, 31 spooky prompts for Whumptober *ੈ✩‧₊˚🕷️🍂

1. ❝ don’t look, try not to show any fear as I tell you this, but I think that pumpkin behind you is alive, and it’s looking at us. ❞

2. ❝ please, I’m not crazy. that scarecrow is alive and it’s trying to kill me. you have to believe me. no one in this town is safe! ❞

3. ❝ you remember that body that was admitted to the morgue last night? the one that has human bite marks that looks nasty infected on the arm. yeah, well, this is going to sound insane, but it’s gone. the body’s missing. ❞

4. ❝ babe, you’re dead. this is the afterlife. we’re all ghosts here. ❞

5. ❝ do not come out of your room when it’s nighttime. no matter what you hear, you must stay in your room throughout the night. ❞

6. ❝ the bats, they’re biting and killing people. we have to run. now! ❞

7. ❝ is that a person sitting on the tree branch? why is she smiling like that? what’s wrong with her eyes? oh my god, she’s crawling down. oh my god, she’s crawling towards us! ❞

8. ❝ you haven’t heard of the blood moon curse? you must be new here. ❞

9. ❝ if you hear a voice calling your name from the woods at night, do not answer. ever. ❞

10. ❝ I got bitten, and I need you to kill me before I turn and become like them. please promise me you’ll kill me before I hurt anybody. please don’t let me be like them. ❞

11. ❝ no, don’t make eye contact with it. keep on walking, but do not run. ❞

12. ❝ there will be a ritual tonight and they will use you as a human sacrifice. you have to get out of here. ❞

13. ❝ shhh, she can’t see us, but she can hear us. be quiet. ❞

14. ❝ what do you mean the doll is alive? it’s just a doll. ❞

15. ❝ one of us is possessed. there’s one way to find out who. ❞

16. ❝ we’ve been walking in circle. we’ve walked past this house before. you see that lady in the window staring at us? she was also there the last time we walked past her property, staring at us through the window exactly like this. it’s like she hasn’t moved at all. ❞

17. ❝ you need my blood to stay alive. drink it. drink. or you die. ❞

18. ❝ I think there’s someone living in the walls. I can hear them breathing at night. ❞

19. ❝ this is a mistake. we should never have come here. the myth is real. we’ll never get out alive now. I’m sorry. gosh, I’m so sorry. ❞

20. ❝ if you see the shadow, you only have 3 days left to live. ❞

21. ❝ are those claw marks on the trees? they weren’t here last night when we set up the tent. ❞

22. ❝ I don’t think the blood on his clothes is fake, neither are the human organs in those jars. we have to get out of here. ❞

23. ❝ I’ve seen it all. the devil is real. it’s too late now. all of us are going to die tonight. ❞

24. ❝ they are not a cult. they’re my family. I’m not being brainwashed. let me go. let me go! ❞

25. ❝ what did you just inject me with? what’s in the syringe? what’s in the fcking syringe?!! ❞

26. ❝ those blood, it’s still fresh, meaning whoever — or whatever — killed it is still around. we have to keep moving, and we have to keep quiet. ❞

27. ❝ she doesn’t like her dolls to speak at night. if she hears your voice after 8 o’clock, she will rip your vocal cord out. ❞

28. ❝ there’s something in the mist. if you breathe, you die. ❞

29. ❝ look at me, hey, look at me, these people, they look like your friends and they sound like your friends. but they’re not your friends. your friends are dead. we cannot trust anybody. ❞

30. ❝ don’t get too close to the water. the fairies have very sharp teeth and strong grips. ❞

31. ❝ be careful in the full moon night. just… be very careful, alright? ❞

TAP HERE FOR; 31 DAYS, 31 TROPES FOR WHUMPTOBER

[talonabraxas]

Phoenix Arcanum XIX, The Sun

Divinatory Meaning of this Card

Every day the golden light beams of the sun disperses the darkness of night and the 30th path on the Tree of Life links the sphere of Yod (Splendour-Mercury) with Yesod (Foundation-Moon) from the left hand side to the central pillar. In Tarot symbolism it is known as the “Collective Intelligence” which translates as the sum total of the 12 zodiacal influences, the celestial portents as well as the fixed stars in the science of astrology that represent the total evolution of the human personality through the process of reincarnation. However, astrologically, it also represents Mercury, as spirit or intellect, acting through the sphere of the Sun, as the masculine principle upon the Moon as the feminine principle. The Sun is simultaneously a receiver and transformer of other planetary influences within its own solar system. In this sense therefore, as it is part of the astral triad, it denotes the rigour of the heart or emotions combined with that of the “hidden soul body”. In declaration of the phrase;

“We do not observe the Sun by the light of the Moon,

No, even the Sun is illuminated and perceived by its own radiance.

Similarly, the true self is made real in this world by the eminence of its own light.”

The gestalt image of a face (Resh) or countenance implying that this path is actually an alchemical synthesis of solar and lunar energies, often represented in the subtle body as the alternating, coiling spirals of ida and pingala usually illustrated in the winged symbol of the caduceus carried by the Greek god Hermes. This path or journey is both individual and universal since it embodies and integrates the physical, the intellectual and the emotional aspects of the personality. It suggests working in harmony with other forms of consciousness, the necessary application of the human will or directive, and the recognition in human affairs of the subtle influences of the collective sub-consciousness.

Positive: Union, material happiness acclaim and recognition celebration of friendship or marriage, success in creative endeavours, openness with children. New achievements, growth and liberation from negative forces. Altruism.

Negative: Loneliness, dissolution abnormal relationships, regression inadequacy.

SPHERE: The Collective Intelligence Resh – A Face Astrological: The Sun in Leo, the 5th House. Constellation: Pegasus – The Flying Horse Sacred Gemstone: Tiger’s Eye or Sunstone

[yanderecrazysie]

Could you do yandere hantengu clones x reader? Thanks

Title: The Winner Takes It All

Pairings: Hantengu Clones (Sekido, Karaku, Aizetsu, Urogi) x Reader

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, descriptions of death

Summary: Maybe you weren’t meant to be a demon slayer. Either way, you’ve bitten off way more than you can chew.

“The winner takes it all

The loser's standing small

Beside the victory

That's her destiny”

-From “The Winner Takes It All” by ABBA

The trees seem to press in on you, their tall branches arching over your head to cage you in. The darkness is all-consuming- inky blackness coats everything outside of the light of the village. The light is brighter than it should be, seeing as many of the buildings are ablaze, the fire casting flickering shadows across the dead grass.

The wood of the houses is dry from the lack of rain and catches fire like boxes of tinder. The inhabitants run screaming from the area, praying that they will reach the next village over and find refuge there. After all, their home is no longer safe.

The air is thick with the scent of demons.

You watch as your crow flies off, back to the safety of the demon slayer corp headquarters. Hopefully, it will return with a hashira, instead of more lower ranks like you and the only other two slayers that still stand.

There had been twenty-something of you to start.

Blood coats the ground in puddles and splatters. The bodies of demon slayers and villagers alike litter the streets and are picked apart by rats. Neither the innocent villagers nor the trained warriors were sufficiently prepared for this battle.

The two slayers that stand are both young men, a rank or two above you at most. You do not know them, but you beg the gods to keep them alive. It’s not for their sake, no, it’s a selfish wish.

You don’t want to be alone.

Chaos rages through the village from four completely different sources. The initial demon has disappeared, the false excitement of taking off his head long since faded. He was, no doubt, alive and hiding somewhere as the four new demons that had come from the beheading wreaked havoc on the burning village.

You want to go back to the headquarters, where it was safe, and find a job that didn’t involve actually fighting man-eating demons anymore. You had cut off the heads of 47 demons, but none of them had been a part of the 12 kizuki, much less an upper moon.

You had seen the “Upper Rank Four” kanji written on his wide red eyes as he begged and pleaded to keep his head. Such a pathetic demon didn’t seem to fit in the upper ranks, and it seemed like it would be a quick execution.

Now, you wish none of you had fallen for that trap. From his head grew another and another until four completely different, extremely powerful demons were wielding their destructive power on the helpless village.

“Hey!” a voice sounds above you, one filled with a boundless joy that does not belong here, “Isn’t that the girl Hantengu’s always watching?”

Slowly, you look up. You’re the only girl around, there’s no doubt in your mind that you’re the topic on his tongue, but you wallow in denial. Hantengu? Isn’t that the name of the whiny demon we were sent to slay?

Above you, flapping his wings, is one of the four demons that now plague this village. His golden eyes stare playfully down at you, his mouth open in a smile so wide that you can see the word “joy” written in black on his tongue.

“I’m so excited! I’ve always wanted to meet you!” Suddenly, the half-bird man is folding his wings and diving straight down at you, cackling gleefully.

You swing your sword upwards desperately but he dodges the blow with ease, his hands- or, rather, his talons, grip your shoulders and rip you off the ground with a kick that sends dust flying and the pair of you into the air.

You have nothing to grab onto but your sword and it takes all you have to hold onto that when the shock of your feet leaving the ground hits you. His talons dig into your skin through your uniform, the nails thick and sharp. Unable to do much else, you let him do what he wants.

He flies to the tallest building’s roof and drops you a few feet above it. You land awkwardly and feel a pain shoot through your ankle as you struggle to find purchase on the slanted ground. Finally, you come to a stop near the edge, heart pounding as you take your sword in both hands and glare at the avian man soaring high above you in the night sky.

A clang startles you and you swing around to face yet another demon. This one has red eyes that glare daggers through your very soul, and his Khakkhara staff bangs ominously against the shingles of the flat roof he stands upon.

He looks much less friendly than the bird-man and suddenly you wish you were in the air again.

Even worse, the other two demons approach from your left and right respectively. The golden-eyed joyful bird-man lands behind you, so that you are completely surrounded by the demon clones.

“You have a good eye, Urogi,” the demon to your left speaks to the bird-like demon with a grin. He has emerald green eyes and carries an Uchiwa, which you recognize as the reason behind most of the destruction in the village houses. You remember him waving the innocent-looking leaf and wrecking a huge hole through several homes at once with just the air alone. 

He catches your eye and sticks out his tongue playfully. You are able to easily read the word “pleasure” written on his tongue and cringe in disgust. He laughs, “Aww, she’s so cute! I just want to eat her up!”

The red-eyed demon with the deadly glare raises his Khakkhara and looks down on you with disdain, “I’ll finish her off quickly.”

You prepare for death, closing your eyes and forcing back tears. If only a hashira had come…

“But won’t Hantengu be sad?” a soft voice asks. You open your eyes and look over at the demon to your right. He has big, sorrowful eyes and he looks down, carefully avoiding your gaze. 

The scary red-eyed demon holds his Khakkhara in the air, mercifully keeping it from touching the ground and releasing the electric bolts that had spelled the end for several other demon slayers. He lets out an angry huff and his glare turns even crueller, “Maybe he will be happy to see her in pieces.”

“No, he loves her!” the blue-eyed demon insists.

“What demon loves a human?” the red-eyed demon questions in disgust.

“The one we split off of apparently,” the green-eyed demon snickers, taking the information in stride, “‘means we can’t kill her, Sekido.”

“Fine, kill the remaining two scum,” the red-eyed demon, Sekido, commands. 

Urogi spreads his wings and cackles, “Gladly!”

“With pleasure,” the green-eyed demon agrees.

The two of them leap off of the tall building, landing uninjured on the ground far below and charging the other two demon slayers. You watch in horror as Urogi opens his mouth, a yellow light glowing brightly in his mouth, paired with a feral screech from his throat before shooting out and hitting the two men square in the face. They fall back, paralyzed, completely helpless as the green-eyed demon descends upon them and…

You look away as the first blood splatter hits the ground. You can’t stand to watch them in their final moments, torn literally limb from limb. There is no hope for them. You know before the final scream that they are doomed to die.

Your trembling legs give way beneath you and you fall to your knees. You slide a little closer to the edge and you almost wish you would fall to your death. Surely that would be quicker than whatever these demons have planned for you.

The sounds of squishing flesh and splashing blood fills your ears. Tears drip down your cheeks and fall from your chin. You’re truly alone now. Or, rather, you’re the only human around.

“Hey, do you think Master Muzan will let us keep her?” an arm wraps around your waist and pulls you close. You look up tearfully and shudder when you see the pleasure demon looking down at you with excitement.

“How sad, maybe she would prefer death,” the sad demon says, “I fear that we may break her.”

The red-eyed demon walks up to you and grips your chin tightly, tilting it upwards so he can study you. He is quiet for a moment or two before he lets you go. 

“I can’t deny she is quite attractive,” he admits, angry frown still not leaving his face.

“So we can keep her?” the green-eyed demon asks.

“Ahh, my heart is singing with joy!” Urogi crows, “She’ll be ours forever!”

“Until she dies, of course…” the blue-eyed demon moans sadly.

“Don’t be stupid,” the angry demon huffs, “Master Muzan will turn her into a demon.”

“What a sad fate…”

Urogi smiled widely, “Well, why not begin forever now?” He turned to you, smile morphing into a smirk, “Sorry red riding hood, the big, bad wolf is winning this time around.”

He opened his mouth and a yellow light began to glow inside it.

In a moment, you’d be unconscious and completely at his mercy.

[ktwritesstuff]

The Babysitter (a Last of Us fanfic) pt. 1

Title: The Babysitter Fandom: The Last of Us Rating: PG (Later chapters will be explicit) Characters & Pairings: Joel Miller x Reader Word Count: ~2,000 Summary: Sarah's babysitter has a thing for Joel. Lovingly beta-read by @bs-fangirl, The Last of Us's number one fangirlie. <3

Part 1 (below cut) | Part 2 (posted 2/2) | Part 3 (posted 2/6) | Part 4 (posted 2/10) | Part 5 (posted 2/14) | Part 6 (posted 4/2) | Part 7 (posted 7/29) | Part 8 (posted 5/13)

Austin 2002

“Hey, Sweetpea!”

You looked up at the sound of your childhood nickname, not sure right away who was calling for you.  In a small town familiarity was de rigueur.  You went to school with people referred to exclusively as Cooter, Biggie, and Ears, so it could have been worse. 

You were waiting for the bus just outside the school cafeteria when your brother, Paul, came over in his football uniform.  He almost never talked to you at school, so you figured he wanted something.  He was old for his grade and had made the varsity team as a sophomore; your parents were over-the-moon.  In your opinion, it had gone to his head.

“You have a dollar?  I want to get a gatorade before practice.”

“Here,” you dug through your purse and fished out your last dollar, rolling your eyes as he sprinted off toward the vending machines without so much as a thank you.

“We’re going to the mall when Andy gets out of practice, you wanna come?” Your best friend, Cheryl, asked.  

“I can’t,” you said.  “I’m babysitting.”  

“Nah,” your friend Mercedes teased.  “She’s got a hot date with Papi Joel.”

“Oh my God,” Cheryl laughed.  “That’s so messed up, stop it.”

“Yeah, that’s super weird,” you laughed along, hoping they wouldn’t notice the blush rising in your cheeks.

The truth was, you had long-harbored a crush on your handsome neighbor down the block: rugged good looks and soulful brown eyes, hardworking, good with his hands, a loving father, the whole package left you feeling weak in the knees.  But you would never say so, not even to your best friend.  As nice as it was to daydream about, you knew it could never happen and admitting it would just make you look desperate and pathetic.

“Seriously though,” Mercedes insisted.  “If you had to pick a dad, he’s primo DILF material.”

“JJ’s dad is kinda hot,” Tina said, stubbing out her joint on the sidewalk ramp.

“JJ’s dad isn’t hot,” Mercedes corrected.  “He just lets us party in his barn–besides, clearly Mr. Miller has ulterior motives. What 12 year old still needs a babysitter?”

It was true, Sarah was getting a little old for a sitter, but Joel still asked you to keep an eye on her.  You figured he wanted her to have another girl to talk to.  Someone older and wiser she could confide in about bullies, to go shopping with her, and teach her how to use a tampon.  On paper, you were a certified good-influence: a church-going honors student, marching band, a literal Girl Scout.  

Joel couldn’t afford to pay you much, but he was a good guy.  He kept your favorite snacks in the house and gave you rides when your daddy wouldn’t let you use the Jeep; last summer he had installed a phone jack in your room so you could have your own line.  More than that, Sarah was actually a pretty cool kid; you liked hanging out with her.

“Seriously, Mercedes,” you warned.  “I know you’re just fucking around, but you can’t talk like that.  Not at school.  That’s the kind of shit that got Mr. Spaden put on a watchlist.” 

“That and flashing sixth period APUSH,” Mercedes laughed.   

“He’s like a widower, right?”  Tina asked.  “Kind of emo.”

Your brow furrowed.  

“I don’t know,” you admitted.  “They don’t really talk about Sarah’s mom.”

“I mean, she has to be dead, right?” Cheryl said.  “What kind of mom would just abandon her kid like that?”

You shrugged.  “Maybe that’s why they don’t talk about her.”   

The Millers’ house was just two streets over from yours.  At 4pm you met Sarah at her bus stop and walked her home.  

“So how was school?” you asked.  

Sarah shrugged.  “You know, it’s school.”

You wrapped an arm around Sarah, giving her an encouraging squeeze as you walked.  

“Guess what I brought,” you said, reaching into your bag for your copy of Clueless on dvd.  “We can make popcorn and paint our nails, give you a little makeover.  What do you think?”

“Sounds good,” Sarah leaned into you. “As long as you use real butter this time.  None of that diet crap that gave me the shits.”  

“Well excuse me,” you rolled your eyes.  “Not all of us can be effortlessly thin.”  

You ordered pizza–an indulgence, but Joel insisted on treating when he had to work late–and put on the movie.  By the time the credits rolled your mani-pedis had time to set, so you brought out your makeup bag and let Sarah pick out a CD to put in the stereo–some twangy duet.  A man and a woman singing along to a surprisingly cheerful tune.

Bye bye love, bye bye happiness Hello loneliness, I think I’m gonna cry…

“What happened to Destiny’s Child?” you asked.

“Nothing,” Sarah stuck her tongue out.  “It’s one of my dad’s.”

You knew Sarah had more alternative sensibilities–even more than yours–and sometimes struggled to fit in.  She didn’t shop at Hollister and Abercrombie, she didn’t have straight hair and pencil-thin eyebrows.  She didn’t even have a traditional family.  Everyone wanted to belong somewhere, but you hoped with a little guidance, Sarah could avoid some of the pitfalls you had faced in high school and figure out she didn’t have to change herself for the sake of others.

“You don’t have to like something just because your dad does,” you said as Sarah took a seat on the carpet beside you.  “You have to decide for yourself–make your own way in the world.”  

“For your information,” Sarah said.  “Loretta Lynn is very punk.”

“Alright, punk,” you laughed.  “We can work with that.”

You gave Sarah a mirror to hold as you dusted her eyelids with sparkly blue shadow and showed her how to apply pencil to her waterline.  

“You’re pretty enough as it is,” you said, dipping a brush into the blush to apply on the apples of her cheeks.  “We’re just enhancing your natural beauty.”

Sarah shifted her seat, her brows furrowing with tension.

“How do you find somebody,” she asked.  “Someone you like and let them know you want to get to know them.”

“I’m sorry, honey, I think I’m the wrong person to ask,” you said with a laugh.  “I haven’t had much luck in that department.  Just be yourself, anyone who doesn’t appreciate that isn’t worth your time.”  

“There aren’t any boys you like at school?”  

“To be honest, high school boys are pretty gross,” you said.  “Why, is there someone you’re interested in?”

“Do you like my dad?”  Sarah blurted out.

You froze; the hairs on the back of your neck prickling.

“What?  Are you being funny?” you forced a laugh, setting down your makeup brushes.  Your ears burned red.  “Of course I like your dad.  He’s super nice.”

“No, I mean do you like him like him,” Sarah pressed.  “Do you think he’s cute…”

“He’s a good looking man,” you stammered, hoping it sounded like it was the first time this had occurred to you.  “You know, for a grown up.”

“He doesn’t have anybody,” Sarah frowned.  “Doesn’t go out..Meet people…Date.  If he’s a good guy and girls think he’s cute.  It’s gotta be me, don’t you think?  I’m the reason he’s alone.”

“Oh Sarah,” you sighed, taking her hands.  “It’s not you.  And even if it were, you’re worth it.  Your daddy loves you more than anything–I wish my parents had half as much interest in my life as your dad has in yours.  You are amazing; you have such a good heart.  So you can’t think like that, okay?  You are enough.  You are everything.”

Sarah nodded and you dabbed her eyes with a tissue before her mascara started running.  

“Come here, let me put on the finishing touch.” You swiped peach-flavored gloss across her lips.  “What do you think?”

“I look different,” she said, observing her reflection in the little compact mirror.  “I think I like it.”  

“You should keep this one,” you said, handing her the lip gloss.  “Color looks better on you.”

Sarah held the tube of gloss in both hands and finally cracked a smile.

“It’s getting late.  You go wash up before bed, alright,” you told her.  “You want to take a bubble bath?  I brought Warm Vanilla Sugar.” 

You waited downstairs while Sarah cleaned up; she changed into her pjs and was in bed by 10:30.  You nodded off on the couch for a bit until Joel came in a little after 11.

“Hey, Sweetpea, thanks for staying,” Joel said, reaching into his back pocket and pulling a $20 out of his wallet for you.  “I really appreciate it.”

He looked tired.  In your half-dozing state, you wondered what it would be like to be the one he came home to at night.  To greet him at the door with a beer and a kiss.  To curl up on the couch together for movie nights with Sarah nestled between you.  To have someone to take care of and someone to take care of you.

“Yeah, of course,” you yawned, rubbing your eyes.  “She’s been good as gold.  Just got to bed about a half hour ago.”

“Let me just say goodnight and I’ll give you a ride home,” Joel said, heading up the stairs.  

You gathered your things while Joel tucked in Sarah.  He grabbed his keys and ushered you outside.  He opened the passenger side door of his truck for you to climb in.  

Joel started up the car and pulled out of the driveway.  His hand was resting on the gearshift.  You stretched, letting your hand brush against his.  He pulled away like you had burned him.  

“Your hands are freezing,” he said, reaching for the heater, turning the dial all the way up.  “It’ll warm up in a minute, put your hands up to the vent.”  

You drew your hands back into your lap, sitting stock-still and ashamed as Joel turned the car at the end of the cul de sac.   

“So how’s school going?” Joel asked, breaking the silence.

“Pretty good,” you nodded.

“You thinking about college, or���”

“Right now, UT Austin,” you said.  

“That’s a great school,” Joel said.  “Close to home.”  You watched a muscle in his jaw flex.

“It’s a guaranteed scholarship once I finish my Gold Award,” you said.  “I’m building a rosary garden for the church.”  That was if the stupid council ever approved your damn project.  Even after you had planted and mulched and hauled paving stones and gravel, they kept insisting you needed to do more.  Apparently anything less than solving world hunger fell short of their expectations–and yet the Eagle Scouts got all the prestige? 

“I remember, you were working on that the last time you came over,” he said.  “How’s it going?”

“Actually, I was wondering if you might let me borrow some tools,” you said.  “I’m building a pergola, you know, to shade the Blessed Virgin.”

You chuckled and Joel chuckled.

“Yeah, absolutely,” he said.  “Can’t let the Blessed Virgin get heat stroke, right?”

“I really appreciate it,” you said, glancing sideways at him.  “My daddy’s kind of useless.”

“Your daddy’s a good man,” Joel said sternly as he turned the truck down your street.  “A good man.”

“I know.”  You stared out the window.  Your father had helped the Millers out after Tommy got arrested at Benji’s drive in for decking some guy for calling him a wetback.  But clearly Joel had never seen your daddy drunk.  “I just wouldn’t trust him around power tools.”

Joel stopped the car along the curb at the end of your driveway.  You held your breath as he reached over you to unlatch the door and push it open.  

“You go on now,” he instructed.  “I’ll watch you get in the door.” 

“Goodnight, Mr. Joel,” you said, sliding down from the seat of the truck.  You were keenly aware of his eyes on your back as you made your way down the driveway.  

You paused with your key in the front door, looking back down the drive before you stepped inside.  Joel was still waiting; you waved at him and he smiled back before shifting the car into gear as you closed the door.

[rust-painted-fingers]

Day 2 ... Full Moon

Techno's finger's glided over the keys, touch quick and playful. His shadow danced and flickered, following the rhythm of the music.

It was half past three, and Phil has yet to arrive home.

A dissonant chord echoed through the house, Techno's accompanying sigh hidden.

"I swear if you come back with an open wound…" Techno murmured, gaze enraptured by the flickering flame.

Phil was having a very bad, no good, terrible fucking shift.

12 hours till 3 am:

"You ready Phil?"

He met Niki's eyes and they shared a sigh.

"I swear to god I'm never taking this shift ever again, I'll fucking transfer if I have to," Phil grumbled, going over inventory.

"That's what you say now, but then you'll start feeling like a hare in a colony of bunnies soon enough," Niki quipped, scrubbing down the inside of the truck. "If I couldn't stand three hours what makes you think you can?"

Phil ignored her.

"Uhh, what are you talking about…"

Ranboo jumped at the sudden attention from the two of them.

"Shit this is your first time, isn't it?"

Niki bulldozed through Ranboo's spluttering, "Ignore him, he's just grumpy his and Techno's schedule never align." She waved her, now ignoring Phil's indignant 'Hey!' "All you need to know is everything's about to be more chaotic."

"Chaotic…?" It was clear Ranboo had no clue what was going on.

Phil sighed, "The full moon is here and its about to make every patient ten times more difficult."

"I thought that was just a myth," Ranboo said, fingers fidgeting with the box of supplies Phil asked for.

Taking the box, Phil called over his shoulder, "Believe it or not, be prepared for the worst."

10 hours till 3 am:

"How do you cut your finger off with a pumpkin scoop."

Phil looked up from his stretch. "You alright?"

Ranboo lifted his head, wonder shining in his eyes, plus some speck of pumpkin guts. "It was a kid kit."

21 year old male, helping his nieces carve their first pumpkin. Overeager and began carving the pumpking before all of the guts were scooped. Wanting to clean it up a little more, he grabbed ahold of the pumpking bowling style and lobbed his ring finger off.

Phil shrugged, "You've seen worse."

"Yeah, and somehow a pumpkin full of blood is still more disturbing."

"Ok it wasn't filled—"

"Alright boys, we can worry about Ranboo's mental state later, can you reach the top? I think I saw some guts fly up there."

Phil watched as Ranboo sweeped pumpkin innards into a bucket, already tired.

8 hours till 3am:

"Oh my god Jason you fucking asshole!"

"Ma'am we need you to step aside."

"You know I get scared easy, why would you—"

"Hey I know this is a lot, what's your name?"

"Jessica," the young woman sobbed, tears and blood streaming down her face.

"Ok, hi Jessica, I'm Ranboo. I need you to follow me outside, I promise you my team is doing everything they can to help— Jason was it?"

"They named him after that stupid fucking movie, I know!"

"Hey this is not a judging zone, promise, let's get you…" His voice went distant, escorting the distraught wife outside of the kitchen.

Phil locked eyes with Niki.

"On three, one, two, three—!"

30 year old male, father. Wanted to surprise his wife who was preparing dinner. Instead, he got a surprise slash to the chest, inches away from his neck.

"Well there goes our scary movie nights…" Jason groaned. Phil and Niki were careful but speed was critical and a few bumps were unnavoidable.

They passed Ranboo and Jessica. "I can't fucking believe you did that on our anniversary." She seemed more composed, her wobbly voice the only sign of distress.

"Ranboo."

"Ready."

5 hours till 3 am:

"I thought firefighters were the ones who helped people stuck on trees."

"They do, but our patient isn't stuck in a tree anymore," Ranboo said. Phil was more preoccupied cleaning his hands once more with a wipe. Blood always got tacky and settled inside the skin. It was a feeling Phil grew used to but even he could only tolerate it so much.

Niki glanced over to the front. "Hey Ranboo, are you sure they gave you the right direction? The city doesn't have any trees, at least not this far in."

"Didn't you guys know, they installed a new sculpture downtown," Ranboo grimaced, eyes on the road.

A beat.

"You're joking."

"Honestly would've thought you knew, Phil, didn't Techno mention it?"

Phil didn't answer the question, because Techno did mention it. In fact, he talked about it in great detail, and Phil already knew the scene awaiting them was going to be bloody as all hell.

"Niki, get double of everything ready." Because the tree they were headed to was an installation that featured spikes surrounding the trunk. Phil can still remember the excited way Techno spoke of the symbolism, how there was a birds nest that the cuckoo chick basically took hostage. It wasn't meant to last long, there was a numbered amount of normal eggs the cuckoo was meant to push out.

Phil wondered if Techno would be fine missing that particular date night.

4 hours till 3am:

"You alright there mate?"

Niki nodded, as if there wasn't a huge black eye forming on her right side.

Ranboo was a little too quiet for his taste, so Phil let her organize the remaining inventory to check up on him. She was used to the frenzy.

Taking in a deep breath, he released it as he knocked shoulders with Ranboo. He really was too tall, sitting down and yet he only barely reached his chin.

"It's not my fault you're short."

Any and all good will left Phil as he captured Ranboo in an elbow lock.

"It's not a matter of short or tall, Ran," Phil gritted, "It's about the abnormaility that is your femur being longer than our entire torso."

They grappled for a bit, with Phil as a clear winner because Ranboo may be over two meters, but his limbs were gangly and a trip hazard more than anything.

"Ok ok! I'm fine I promise!"

Phil let him go, but left his arm resting on his shoulders. "Yeah?"

Those shoulders shrugged. "I mean, you were right. I'm used to seeing worse. Honestly I don't think anything will ever beat that time with the maggots." Phil suppressed the urge to gag. He managed to block that memory.

"I get the feeling there's more."

A chuckle, "I don't know man, it's just weird. Usually the worst of worst gets spaced between shifts, but we just came back from a scare actor punching Niki, and that's the tame part."

Three highschoolers, ages 16 and a 17 year old, excited for a haunted house promoted as free for students. The cost came in the form of unsafe practices and two electracuted teenagers. The seventeen year old sported broken knuckles for getting into an altercation with an actor right before they arrived. Niki was mistaken for the teenager and got sucker punched.

"You gotta admit, it was pretty funny seeing the guy fly through the air."

He got a laugh, and Ranboo wheezed in between breaths, "I keep forgetting she has a black belt in Brazilian Jiu Jistsu."

"And you better not anymore after that demonstration."

Both Ranboo and Phil jumped, Niki cooly leaning against the truck.

"Aye aye, captain!" They chorused.

Niki grinned and went to sit next to the driver's seat.

2 hours till 3am:

"How ya holding up," Niki chirped.

Phil looked at her questioningly.

She rolled her eyes. "We're close to done, did you and Techno have any plans?"

"No jinxing! I am so close to saying goodbye to the mortal realm and you are not taking that from me!" Ranboo chimed in.

"You just had to ask en route?" Phil grinned.

Niki shrugged. "Can't really ask after, can I? The minute the clock strikes and you're gone," she teased.

Phil conceeded. "There's nothing planned, maybe I'll listen to a new piece he practiced." He laughed at her pout. "What do you want me to tell you? We're old and I can hear our bones crack in the morning."

She blew a nonexistent strand of her off her face — Phil didn't want to mention the tightness of her bun in case of causing unecessary stress of balding— and snapped a new pair of gloves. "Well I'm going on a picnic. It's going to be romantic and I'll have LED candles to set the mood."

"Can I come."

"I thought you were leaving this mortal realm?"

Phil just smiled, and against his better judgement, hoped this would be the last call of the night. Maybe he could surprise Techno.

30 minutes till 3am:

"I swear to gods if they don't count this as overtime—"

"Are you kidding? I'm pretty sure the director is afraid of you."

"Ranboo bring the truck around, I don't think we can move any further without making the injury worse."

Long legs disappeared around the corner before Niki finished her sentence.

"At least it isn't too bad, we should be able to get back to the hospital just before clock strikes three," Phil said, patting the man's pocket for a wallet.

Unknown adult male, heavier with height and weight, a sliced achilles heel on the right leg. Currently unconcsious.

"It's kinda weird, they didn't tell us how he got hurt… Did you find a wallet?"

It was strange, even more strange how there was nothing, not even a social security card or anything. "No, did they say anything about his mental state?"

Niki hummmed, hands busy with bandages, "Not that I remember, but they said the line cut after he provided the address, maybe he got mugged?"

The male wore a typical business suit, four pant's pockets and nothing inside them. He checked the jacket's inner pockets and yielded similar results. "This is weird, he doesn't have any further bruising or lacerations—"

"Uhm, guys…" Niki and Phil looked up, and froze.

Ranboo, with shaky fingers and a trembling lip, said, "Sorry, I didn't mean to bring them to you."

Aimed at his head, a man pointed a gun.

Bored of waiting, Techno abandonded the piano in search of Carl.

"There you are, I guess you're waiting for him too huh?"

The tortie looked up at him with wide unblinking eyes, curled in a cute donut shape on the couch.

"C'mon, let's watch something while we wait. We'll make Phil jealous that he can't join the cuddle pile until after he showers." Techno scooped up Carl, and as predicted, he began purring up a storm.

Techno wasn't paying attention all that much when he turned on the TV. Really, he just wanted some background noise while cuddling Carl so it opened on the news channel.

So focused on the soft fur beneath his hand, Techno barely caught the next words.

"—hostage situation that is using three EMT workers and an unknown civilian. Currently the hostage taker speaks of religious affiliation and requests to, quote, 'let the ritual commence without interruption—"

Techno's chest got felt heavier as he drowned out the noise of the news anchor because suddenly he was meeting Phil's gaze. It was his word ID, the one he always complained about because he looked like a sleazeball when in reality he was caught mid blink.

"Mrow."

Techno barely noticed Carl leaving his lap, his head full of static. No fucking way. It couldn't be. There would always be weird shit that happened but never did Phil get caught in a fucking hostage situ—

"Techno, hey woah—"

Before he could think beyond 'danger' his fist swung. A hang grabbed and pulled him forward, but he caught their foot to unbalance them. As gravity pulled them down Techno met Phil's eyes and only had a proficient 'fuck' fly through his head before they hit the ground. Hard.

"Ah, mate, I just got out of a hostage situation, I don't think I can spar anymore without a warmup at least."

Techno was still speechless at several realizations at once. And then he grunted as he felt Carl's 15 pound body put all his weight onto his shoulder. "Carl why are you doing this to me."

"It's called karma, Tech."

"And you!" Techno shouted, surprising Phil, "Why the hell didn't you call me! Why did I have to endure five minutes of pure adrenaline before your pasty ass got home."

Phil spluttered, choking out a laugh. "If I called you would've been even more of a wreck, what are you talking about!"

"But it would have been a controlled nervous wreck instead of an unrestrained catastrophizing spiral into—"

"Techno we're still on the floor."

"— a future where Carl would be raised by a single father—"

"Can I please shower before reassuring you I'm ok."

"I'm not letting you anywhere out of my sight from now on," Techno sniped, pulling Phil up.

Phil scritched Carl from where he curled around Techno's shoulders. "I really wasn't hurt, Niki had the worst of us and the black eye wasn't even from the guy."

It took a few minutes of patting Carl before Phil looked at Techno's unimpressed face.

"And Ranboo?"

A wince. "We pushed for him to take a break but the kid doesn't know how to stop. I think he would go insane if he actually took it."

Techno sighed. "I'm organizing a tea party and you're all expected to attend."

Phil laughed, taking off in the direction of the bathroom.

[bingbongsupremacy]

How To Kiss Pt. 2

Pairing: Ellie Williams x reader

Warnings: Drug Use

Summary: While at a party, you run into the girl who was once your best friend.

Also Joel works at an Auto Shop in this.

Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Pt. 3

*Not Proof Read* TLOU Masterlist

*****

I'd heard the rumors. Joel and Ellie were moving back. They bought Mr. Hoagans' old auto shop. Sarah had passed and they needed to get out of the city.

But those were rumors. Rumors aren't true.

Most of the time.

They started back in July and for the most part, died down.

" Here put this on. " Dina shoves a silky top in my direction.

" Fuck no. I'm already going to Ian's stupid party. I don't want to ruin a good shirt with booze or god knows what. " I refuse.

" You'll look hot. " Dina protests. " And I promise it won't get ruined. "

I let out a frustrated groan, flopping back onto my bed. Dina's been pressuring me into going to this party for weeks. " Fuck, fine. I'm not wearing fucking heels though. " I warn.

Dina grins. " Don't worry, I wouldn't torture you that much. "

By the time we finish getting ready, we're half an hour late to the party. Majority of the street is filled with the cars of people attention the party. Drunk college students filter in and out of the building.

Dina squeezes my shoulder in excitement. " I'm gonna go find Jesse. get me a drink, will ya? " She leaves before I have room to protest.

Great.

I squeeze my way through the hallway towards the kitchen. I grab a couple cans of beer and wait for Dina.

Twenty minutes later Dina's still no where to be found.

She fucking forgot me.

I contemplate leaving, quickly realizing Dina drove here. Fuck.

I make my way to the porch. I need some air. This is going to be a long night.

I open the sliding glass door, a cool breeze quickly brushing against me. I let out a deep breath. I shouldn't have come here tonight. What did I think was going to happen? I haven't been to one of these in years? I don't know anyone here besides Dina and Jesse.

" I thought I saw you. " A voice says from my left.

I jump, startled by the sudden noise.

The moon shines on the person just enough for me to see their face. Ellie.

" Ellie? "

" Y/N. "

A slightly uncomfortable feeling runs up my body. What the fuck am I supposed to say to her? Hi? How are you? How was fucking Boston?

" You haven't changed a bit. " Ellie's eyes wander up my figure. Her hand moves to her mouth and I notice the familiar shape of a joint.

" Wish I could say the same. " I mutter while eyeing her arm tattoo.

Ellie lets out a small chuckle. " Yeah. I guess I have changed a bit. " Ellie shifts out of shadows and further into the moonlight.

She's wearing a white tank top and her signature flannel. The cuffs of her flannel shirt are folded up, exposing her tattoo and some of her muscles.

Her face is much more defined than a few years ago.

She holds out the joint.

I carefully accept it. Tonight can't get any more fucked, right? Maybe this'll help.

We stand silently, passing the joint back and forth.

A sense of nostalgia floods my memories. The first time we discovered weed, I'd stolen a joint from my older sister. We'd snuck out of Joel's house in the middle of the night to smoke in the back yard. Neither of us had ever smoked before and immediately ended up choking on the smoke.

Eventually we got the hang of it. Somehow Ellie always managed to snag some weed from god knows where. It became part of our ritual on Fridays. At 12-1 we'd sneak out of the house to smoke. We never got caught.

Usually there was a lot more talking involved.

Should I ask Ellie about what happened between us? About why she stopped calling?

Deciding against it, I just stand back and enjoy the moment.

" I missed you. " I whisper quietly.

Ellie's quiet for a moment. I almost wonder if she didn't hear me.

" I missed you too. " She replies quietly.

I glance over at her. Her eyes are trained straight ahead on the trees as she takes another drag.

Maybe I should ask her?

Before I get the opportunity, the door opens. A group of rowdy boys squeezes their way through us.

I look up, preparing to talk to Ellie again when I notice she's gone. I glance inside the kitchen to see her making her way through the hallway, abandoning me once again.

[mybeautifulchristianjourney]

The Future Glory of Israel

1 Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen upon you. 2 For behold, darkness shall cover the earth, and thick darkness the peoples; but the Lord will arise upon you, and his glory will be seen upon you. 3 And nations shall come to your light, and kings to the brightness of your rising. 4 Lift up your eyes all round, and see; they all gather together, they come to you; your sons shall come from afar, and your daughters shall be carried on the hip. 5 Then you shall see and be radiant; your heart shall thrill and exult, because the abundance of the sea shall be turned to you, the wealth of the nations shall come to you. 6 A multitude of camels shall cover you, the young camels of Midian and Ephah; all those from Sheba shall come. They shall bring gold and frankincense, and shall bring good news, the praises of the Lord. 7 All the flocks of Kedar shall be gathered to you; the rams of Nebaioth shall minister to you; they shall come up with acceptance on my altar, and I will beautify my beautiful house. 8 Who are these that fly like a cloud, and like doves to their windows? 9 For the coastlands shall hope for me, the ships of Tarshish first, to bring your children from afar, their silver and gold with them, for the name of the Lord your God, and for the Holy One of Israel, because he has made you beautiful. 10 Foreigners shall build up your walls, and their kings shall minister to you; for in my wrath I struck you, but in my favour I have had mercy on you. 11 Your gates shall be open continually; day and night they shall not be shut, that people may bring to you the wealth of the nations, with their kings led in procession. 12 For the nation and kingdom that will not serve you shall perish; those nations shall be utterly laid waste. 13 The glory of Lebanon shall come to you, the cypress, the plane, and the pine, to beautify the place of my sanctuary, and I will make the place of my feet glorious. 14 The sons of those who afflicted you shall come bending low to you, and all who despised you shall bow down at your feet; they shall call you the City of the Lord, the Zion of the Holy One of Israel. 15 Whereas you have been forsaken and hated, with no one passing through, I will make you majestic for ever, a joy from age to age. 16 You shall suck the milk of nations; you shall nurse at the breast of kings; and you shall know that I, the Lord, am your Saviour and your Redeemer, the Mighty One of Jacob. 17 Instead of bronze I will bring gold, and instead of iron I will bring silver; instead of wood, bronze, instead of stones, iron. I will make your overseers peace and your taskmasters righteousness. 18 Violence shall no more be heard in your land, devastation or destruction within your borders; you shall call your walls Salvation, and your gates Praise. 19 The sun shall be no more your light by day, nor for brightness shall the moon give you light; but the Lord will be your everlasting light, and your God will be your glory. 20 Your sun shall no more go down, nor your moon withdraw itself; for the Lord will be your everlasting light, and your days of mourning shall be ended. 21 Your people shall all be righteous; they shall possess the land for ever, the branch of my planting, the work of my hands, that I might be glorified. 22 The least one shall become a clan, and the smallest one a mighty nation; I am the Lord; in its time I will hasten it. — Isaiah 60 | English Standard Version Anglicised (ESVUK) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version Anglicised Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers. Cross References: Genesis 25:13; Genesis 27:29; Exodus 6:7; 2 Samuel 7:10; 1 Chronicles 28:2; Psalm 48:7; Psalm 102:13; Psalm 147:14; Isaiah 1:7; Isaiah 10:22; Isaiah 11:12; Isaiah 49:21; Matthew 2:11; Matthew 4:16; Matthew 15:13; 2 Corinthians 6:11; Colossians 1:13; Hebrews 12:22; Revelation 21:4; Revelation 21:23,24,25 and 26; Revelation 22:5

[megarywrites]

find the word

tagged by @thewriteflame and I'll tag......... @pinespittinink @daisywords @zmwrites @coarsely @at-thezenith and your words will be stagger, stoic, straight, and strong.

my words were rush, rule, rage, and reflect and I'll be pulling them from what I have rewritten so far of Parts I and II of the second draft of Seafoam.

rush - from Part II: Split, Chapter 12, "Ugly Truths"

The moons’ light sliced through the shadows, cool and as calming as the sound of the rush of the incoming sea. Squinting, I stepped into the patch of light streaming in from the first of the windows lining the wall, and headed down, taking care to try to steady my breathing with each passing step.  Had he—the Diamo…and the captain, I suppose—genuinely expected me to just…let him touch me? Without warning? Or provocation? Or, had I perhaps done something that made him think…No, nothing. I had done nothing.  Why had he thought that that was an acceptable thing to do to someone?  Had he no daughter nor wife?

rule - from Part II: Split, Chapter 10, "The Haven of the Gods"

Stretching far above, a dizzying dapple of colored light from the sun shining through the stained glass towers and turrets. The shimmering dust caught in the sunlight streaming through the vast expanse of glass was iridescent as it filtered gently down. Candle-lit chandeliers lined the beams criss-crossing over the benches filing the atrium.  All around, more candles flickered in the many indents carved in the marble walls and the bowls of water beneath them caught their glittering light and projected them in ribbons inside the indents. Elaborately carved panels of the same red wood as the doors and the beams filled the spaces between the depressions, showing an even more extensive history of how our religion Isotrei came to rule our land, compared to the simple, thin beams at the latridom back home. Even from here, I could pick out the depiction of Isolios, Tiegira, and Vaceli’s benevolence as they helped our ancestors with their crops back when the gods used to walk among us—before Nyari ruined everything with her wanton selfishness. Gold accented the carvings emanating from every iteration of Isolios himself, who seemed to be shown in every single display around the auditorium.  And, below, the floors framing the center aisle was made of the same marble as the walls and the steps outside, but the center aisle itself…the floor was made of glass as a window to look into the rushing Smara—the green, enchanted river of legend.

rage(d) - from Part I: Tremor, Chapter 6, "Sealed Fate"

The storm did keep us inside, just like I thought it would. It raged against our shutters for two days, and I braved the wind and rain to get some buckets from Ma’s potion shed to collect the rainwater that seeped into our home. We stayed wrapped up in our blankets and cushions, sitting as close as we could to the fire while Ma worked on her embroidery in the flickering firelight while I leaned against the hearth, using it as my counter as I made Ma’s flower crown.

reflect(ion) - from Part I: Tremor, Chapter 1, "Homecoming"

Glimpses into other lives—of the baker and his daughter preparing the next day’s wares, or arguments unfolding, of fathers entertaining their children while their wives were preparing supper—flashed before my eyes as I glanced through the windows of the passing homes. Then, further in, the darkened shop windows showed only my fleeting reflection.  A sweeping beam of light drew my gaze up to the tallest tower of Psari’s latridom, and I stopped in my tracks to watch it revolve over the land before it shone back out at the sea. The latridom was lit from within as well. For what, I wasn’t quite sure. Maybe the Stoli were preparing for tomorrow’s service, but… My attention drifted to the three circular stained glass windows adorning the face of the ancient house of worship with a bright kaleidoscope of colors against the gloom of the night.  They painted the surrounding mist and the wet cobblestones in gleaming reds, pinks, blues, yellows, greens, and purples. My skin and clothes, too, as soon as I stepped into its light.

[roman-catholic-mass-readings]

6th January >> Mass Readings (Except USA)

The Epiphany of the Lord

Or

6th January (before Epiphany).

The Epiphany of the Lord

(Liturgical Colour: White: B (2))

First Reading Isaiah 60:1-6 Above you the glory of the Lord appears.

Arise, shine out, Jerusalem, for your light has come, the glory of the Lord is rising on you, though night still covers the earth and darkness the peoples.

Above you the Lord now rises and above you his glory appears. The nations come to your light and kings to your dawning brightness.

Lift up your eyes and look round: all are assembling and coming towards you, your sons from far away and your daughters being tenderly carried.

At this sight you will grow radiant, your heart throbbing and full; since the riches of the sea will flow to you, the wealth of the nations come to you;

camels in throngs will cover you, and dromedaries of Midian and Ephah; everyone in Sheba will come, bringing gold and incense and singing the praise of the Lord.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm Psalm 71(72):1-2,7-8,10-13

R/ All nations shall fall prostrate before you, O Lord.

O God, give your judgement to the king, to a king’s son your justice, that he may judge your people in justice and your poor in right judgement.

R/ All nations shall fall prostrate before you, O Lord.

In his days justice shall flourish and peace till the moon fails. He shall rule from sea to sea, from the Great River to earth’s bounds.

R/ All nations shall fall prostrate before you, O Lord.

The kings of Tarshish and the sea coasts shall pay him tribute. The kings of Sheba and Seba shall bring him gifts. Before him all kings shall fall prostrate, all nations shall serve him.

R/ All nations shall fall prostrate before you, O Lord.

For he shall save the poor when they cry and the needy who are helpless. He will have pity on the weak and save the lives of the poor.

R/ All nations shall fall prostrate before you, O Lord.

Second Reading Ephesians 3:2-3,5-6 It has now been revealed that pagans share the same inheritance.

You have probably heard how I have been entrusted by God with the grace he meant for you, and that it was by a revelation that I was given the knowledge of the mystery. This mystery that has now been revealed through the Spirit to his holy apostles and prophets was unknown to any men in past generations; it means that pagans now share the same inheritance, that they are parts of the same body, and that the same promise has been made to them, in Jesus Christ, through the gospel.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Gospel Acclamation Matthew 2:2

Alleluia, alleluia! We saw his star as it rose and have come to do the Lord homage. Alleluia!

Gospel Matthew 2:1-12 The visit of the Magi.

After Jesus had been born at Bethlehem in Judaea during the reign of King Herod, some wise men came to Jerusalem from the east. ‘Where is the infant king of the Jews?’ they asked. ‘We saw his star as it rose and have come to do him homage.’ When King Herod heard this he was perturbed, and so was the whole of Jerusalem. He called together all the chief priests and the scribes of the people, and enquired of them where the Christ was to be born. ‘At Bethlehem in Judaea,’ they told him ‘for this is what the prophet wrote:

And you, Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, you are by no means least among the leaders of Judah, for out of you will come a leader who will shepherd my people Israel.’

Then Herod summoned the wise men to see him privately. He asked them the exact date on which the star had appeared, and sent them on to Bethlehem. ‘Go and find out all about the child,’ he said ‘and when you have found him, let me know, so that I too may go and do him homage.’ Having listened to what the king had to say, they set out. And there in front of them was the star they had seen rising; it went forward, and halted over the place where the child was. The sight of the star filled them with delight, and going into the house they saw the child with his mother Mary, and falling to their knees they did him homage. Then, opening their treasures, they offered him gifts of gold and frankincense and myrrh. But they were warned in a dream not to go back to Herod, and returned to their own country by a different way.

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

-------------------------------------------------

6th January (before Epiphany) 

(Liturgical Colour: White: B (2))

First Reading 1 John 5:5-13 There are three witnesses: the Spirit and the water and the blood.

Who can overcome the world? Only the man who believes that Jesus is the Son of God: Jesus Christ who came by water and blood, not with water only, but with water and blood; with the Spirit as another witness – since the Spirit is the truth – so that there are three witnesses, the Spirit, the water and the blood, and all three of them agree. We accept the testimony of human witnesses, but God’s testimony is much greater, and this is God’s testimony, given as evidence for his Son. Everybody who believes in the Son of God has this testimony inside him; and anyone who will not believe God is making God out to be a liar, because he has not trusted the testimony God has given about his Son. This is the testimony: God has given us eternal life and this life is in his Son; anyone who has the Son has life, anyone who does not have the Son does not have life.

I have written all this to you so that you who believe in the name of the Son of God may be sure that you have eternal life.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm Psalm 147:12-15,19-20

R/ O praise the Lord, Jerusalem! or R/ Alleluia!

O praise the Lord, Jerusalem! Zion, praise your God! He has strengthened the bars of your gates he has blessed the children within you.

R/ O praise the Lord, Jerusalem! or R/ Alleluia!

He established peace on your borders, he feeds you with finest wheat. He sends out his word to the earth and swiftly runs his command.

R/ O praise the Lord, Jerusalem! or R/ Alleluia!

He makes his word known to Jacob, to Israel his laws and decrees. He has not dealt thus with other nations; he has not taught them his decrees.

R/ O praise the Lord, Jerusalem! or R/ Alleluia!

Gospel Acclamation cf. Mark 9:6

Alleluia, alleluia! The heavens opened and the Father’s voice resounded ‘This is my Son, the Beloved. Listen to him.’ Alleluia

Either:

Gospel Mark 1:6-11 'You are my Son, the Beloved; my favour rests on you'.

In the course of his preaching John said: ‘Someone is following me, someone who is more powerful than I am, and I am not fit to kneel down and undo the strap of his sandals. I have baptised you with water, but he will baptise you with the Holy Spirit.’

It was at this time that Jesus came from Nazareth in Galilee and was baptised in the Jordan by John. No sooner had he come up out of the water than he saw the heavens torn apart and the Spirit, like a dove, descending on him. And a voice came from heaven, ‘You are my Son, the Beloved; my favour rests on you.’

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

Or:

Gospel Luke 3:23-38 Genealogy of Jesus Christ, son of Adam, son of God.

When he started to teach, Jesus was about thirty years old, being the son, as it was thought, of Joseph son of Heli, son of Matthat, son of Levi, son of Melchi, son of Jannai, son of Joseph, son of Mattathias, son of Amos, son of Nahum, son of Esli, son of Naggai, son of Maath, son of Mattathias, son of Semein, son of Josech, son of Joda, son of Joanan, son of Rhesa, son of Zerubbabel, son of Shealtiel, son of Neri, son of Melchi, son of Addi, son of Cosam, son of Elmadam, son of Er, son of Joshua, son of Joshua, son of Eliezer, son of Jorim, son of Matthat, son of Levi, son of Symeon, son of Judah, son of Joseph, son of Jonam, son of Eliakim, son of Melea, son of Menna, son of Mattatha, son of Nathan, son of David, son of Jesse, son of Obed, son of Boaz, son of Sala, son of Nahshon, son of Amminadab, son of Admin, son of Arni, son of Hezron, son of Perez, son of Judah, son of Jacob, son of Isaac, son of Abraham, son of Terah, son of Nahor, son of Serug, son of Reu, son of Peleg, son of Eber, son of Shelah, son of Cainan, son of Arphaxad, son of Shem, son of Noah, son of Lamech, son of Methuselah, son of Enoch, son of Jared, son of Mahalaleel, son of Cainan, son of Enos, son of Seth, son of Adam, son of God.

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

Or:

Gospel Luke 3:23,31-34,36,38 Genealogy of Jesus Christ, son of Adam, son of God.

When he started to teach, Jesus was about thirty years old, being the son, as it was thought, of Joseph son of Heli,… son of Melea, son of Menna, son of Mattatha, son of Nathan, son of David, son of Jesse, son of Obed, son of Boaz, son of Sala, son of Nahshon, son of Amminadab, son of Admin, son of Arni, son of Hezron, son of Perez, son of Judah, son of Jacob, son of Isaac, son of Abraham, son of Terah, son of Nahor,… son of Cainan, son of Arphaxad, son of Shem, son of Noah, son of Lamech,… son of Enos, son of Seth, son of Adam, son of God.

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

[tahanann]

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐋𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬: 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮

❝ To whoever finds these letters, I hope they reach you well ❞ ✎▫✧⭒....

Fandom: Hetalia Relationship: F/M Pairing: Alfred F. Jones (America) / (Female) Reader Chapter list: 00, 01, 02, 03, 04, 05, 06, 07, 08, 09, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14 Also posted on: AO3, Wattpad, Quotev

Chapter 13: " He's gone. " ✎▫✧⭒…

Everything in the world was still right now. The heat had recently swept through (Y/n)'s city, causing an overwhelming amount of warmth in the streets. A slight cold breeze had been a saving grace to the citizens having to deal with the current heatwave. Many people were in their homes or visiting malls to cool off. Lazing around was a popular activity for those who chose to stay in their homes.

(Y/n) was included in that bunch.

The young woman had been laying down on a picnic blanket underneath a tree in her backyard. The tree had been there ever since she's gotten this place and it was certainly a favorite of hers. The branches, with or without their leaves, gave her company whenever she had restless nights. It had been like a friend, who trudged through, giving the shadows that covered her from the moon's light. 

Her eyes stare up at the tree, watching little critters run around. Squirrels had made this tree their home. The sun's rays peeked through gaps between leaves, illuminating some of (Y/n)'s features.

Despite the radiance she received from the sun, she was as dull as ever. The young woman still struggled with her mental health but she took advice from her parents and close friends. She had to cave in because the days had been getting rather difficult to trudge through. With a bit of therapy and support from everyone, things have been much more bearable. 

Work was going smoother now and she was able to socialize as much as before. Felicia and Matthew had been giving her some food through their countless house visits over the past few weeks. Her separated parents found time to call her to check in after she told them about her struggles. They were caring, understanding, and kind. 

They had promised to look after her years ago and they were fulfilling it. 

It was safe to say that (Y/n) was surrounded by people that loved her, but the same can't be said for her love life. Her relationship with her main romantic interest was blurry right now. Her heart ached for a man who likely has a wife and grandchildren by now, but he was possibly not even alive anymore. Either way, the bridge she had built cannot even reach her destination. A restless fog had covered her sights for the end of the bridge. 

It was impossible to cross.

This relationship had been the main source of her misery and (Y/n) had been aware of it for so long. She always thought she could make it work and she fails to see that it has been steering in the wrong direction. The young woman devoted her love to a man that, she believed, loves her back. No one else but Matthew and Felicia knew about this. 

Thank god her parents didn't know. They'd tell her to fully detach herself from him, which seems like something she just can't do. She loved him too much and there was a lot to lose, seeing how her mental health hinges on the very thought of him.

Jones. 

(Y/n) shook her head, dismissing her thoughts. She cannot let herself get lost thinking about him again. Closing her eyes, she let out a sigh, before she opened them once more. The sun was still there, the sky was still as blue as ever, and the tree was still green and brown. She was still laying on a picnic blanket with containers of food surrounding her. 

Evidence of her picnic with Matthew earlier today. 

After a while of sky-watching, the young woman sits up. She pushes her hands through her hair as she adjusts to her new position. She blinked once, twice, three times, before continuing to push herself up to a stand. She gathered the remnants of today's activity and headed into her cold home. The backyard lays dormant for the rest of the afternoon, as (Y/n) once again cooped up in her house. 

The tv in the dark living room played noise in the background as she cooked dinner for one, with a little extra to be served as leftovers for tomorrow. The warm, orange light of the kitchen illuminates her form, but she remains cold always. The heat had left her home as soon as the sun disappeared. The temperature was deathly cold.

Her hands weren't shivering, but there was a chill pressed against her back, overseeing her chop vegetables and put them all in a pot. (Y/n) paid no mind to the presence, as she had been accustomed to it. The cold was always there, hugging her whenever possible. It lived here with her, almost like a partner, and she's grown to love it. 

As a matter of fact, she's always been in love with it. 

She only saw him once, but she always felt him. He was here, always stalking her during the night and disappearing for the morning. The moon energized him, (Y/n) believed), and she was fine with it. She supposed she could use the company.

(Y/n) hummed softly to herself as she finished cooking. It was done now and she could finally dine in the comfort of her living room. Wherever she went, the cold drifted alongside her. It sat beside her on the couch as she played something on the tv to keep her distracted from her thoughts. She ate her dinner, watched for a little while, and eventually went away to follow her usual nightly routine.

Afterward, she rested on her bed, her eyes staring at the abyss. The light of the moon seeped through the gaps between the leaves of the tree and the window, illuminating the area just a bit. It wasn't enough to keep the apparitions from appearing above her. 

Beside her was her phone, playing a random song to fill up the silence. Her (e/c) eyes continue to gaze at the darkness. She tried finding the sparkle of broken glasses again, though he did not appear. Not after that other night, after her dad's visit, did he appear again. The specter she wanted to believe was Jones never showed itself to her again. The ghosts that she saw tonight were the cells in her eyes, floating around in their liquid casing. 

Although she can't see him, she could feel him. The room is still as cold as ever, even if she had her blanket around her. There wasn't a hint of pressure beside her, but he was somewhere here. Watching her, protecting her, she'd liked to believe. The company didn't make her fall asleep, however. There was anxiety gnawing her insides. 

There were only two letters left in the box, and the decline Jones has been going through has not been bright. There were a few light-hearted letters but (Y/n) felt as if that was an attempt to make himself feel better. The war wasn't going well, or at least that's what Jones believed. (Y/n) feared that the last two letters will be anything but good news.

She had every right to think about it that way. 

Even if it was going to be good news, it'll end terribly for her. She'd lose him. The letters are all she had of the soldier.

The young woman continued to stare at the ceiling, letting her fears chew her insides. Eventually, through fatigue, she would fall into a deep sleep, only to wake early in the morning. The sun barely peeked through the horizon. The room was still cold, but only because of the morning chill that occupied her home. The presence that watched over her was gone. (Y/n) was truly alone in her room. 

The (h/c)-haired lady stayed in her room for a few hours, unmoving from her position. She'd pondered and imagined scenarios in her head to make her feel better. It distracted her from the gloom that came with opening the second to last letter. When she had enough energy, she stood up and proceeded with her morning routine. 

There, in the bathroom, she felt him. A cold spot was in the corner, and behind the shadows of her door, she saw a figure. The glint was barely visible, but she could make out his form. (Y/n) stared at the apparition, connecting eyes with him for a moment, before he would fade into the darkness of the shadow. From the mirror, she continued to maintain eye contact. Her body was unmoving, fearing if she did move, he would too. 

Her heart ached. 

"Come back, I want to see you," she'd say. This was the second time she'd see him. But the ghost wouldn't comply, for he had already expended energy to be slightly visible today. It may be that her eyes were just seeing things, but (Y/n) believed it was him. Her still body would eventually move to finish the rest of her routine. When she left, he'd appear within the darkness of her unlit bathroom. (Y/n) felt him move with her, just hovering around. 

She stared at the box that held the letters. The second one was sitting on her lap, ready to be opened, but her focus was on the last one that sat at the bottom of the box. Biting her lip, she turned her attention to the one already out of the container. She swallowed her emotions and ripped open the envelope. She didn't want to scan the letter.

It was all going to be the same.

"Good morning, Jones," (Y/n)'s voice cracked at the mention of his name. "How are you feeling?"

She already knew the answer.

To my darling angel, The operation at the beach was a success, but unfortunately, angel, I'm heavily wounded. I don't think I have that much time to live and I'm okay with that, honestly. I've come to accept that my death is nearing. There's not that much for me to live for anyway. Alex...he's gone. He died the day we stormed the beach. He told me he was going to live but he immediately got shot the moment the ramp opened. It's only been a few days since I last saw him but his image is still burned into my memory. Him, along with the annoying thoughts continue to haunt me. I think death is the only way to get them out of there. I'm the only one left out of my friends anyway. Nobody at home will miss me too much. All my friends are dead because of me and I can't handle the guilt of it all. I can't. It's always been my fault. I've already told Ma and Pa about giving up. They tell me to keep living, but it's hard. I don't want to have them deal with me. I know by the time I come back home, I'm not going to have an easy life. I'm so fucked up, it'll be so hard for me to get accustomed to civilian life again. I'll have so many problems and I don't want Ma and Pa dealing with all of that. I'd rather just get rid of the problem and spare them the trouble. I would live for you but I think it'd be useless. You don't love me anymore. You don't even think about me anymore, so what's the point? You've already, probably, tossed the letter aside. But that's okay. I understand. I won't hold any grudges against you because I know it's hard to love me. If you ever live with me after the war, you'd have the same problems as Ma and Pa. Leaving would make everyone feel better. I'll still love you regardless, even in my dying breath, my angel, I'll still love you. I've always told myself that I'd be your protector, so maybe, if God is good and great, he'll let me. At night, I'll be there, to make sure you're safe and happy. Maybe I can watch over you. I'd forever be the moon to your stars, my darling. I've been in and out of consciousness, or so I've been told. I've been in this med-bay for a while now and I know I can't make it out of here alive. It's kind of funny. I've always wondered what it was like to have death at my doorstep. I thought he'd be cold and overbearing, but he's actually a pretty sweet guy and gives people warmth and comfort whenever they need it. I feel him everywhere in this warm medical bay. He's always been by my side, waiting for my time and I'm afraid that it's already nearing. He sits on my bed and watches over me like the nurses and doctors that tend to my wounds every day.  He's here with me right now while I'm writing this letter. He's telling me that I should write down everything I want to say to you. He's telling me to snap out of it though, but how can I? The very thought of you gives me comfort. Maybe one day, I will, but for as long as I breathe, I'll forever think about you. My vision is fading, baby. I pray to God he'll let me write to you once more. Just one more day, angel, and maybe another. I want to see you again in my dreams. Maybe he'll let me since I can sleep peacefully now. Forever yours, Jones

(Y/n) looked at the letter in her hands, resonating with his acceptance. Her hands tightly gripped the paper as she stared at his writing. It was messy in some parts, but he tried to be neat. There were tear stains on the aged paper. The young woman had a feeling that, even if he said he accepted death, there was a part of him that didn't want to go. He was still in his youth. He wanted to live but what he went through made it impossible for him. 

The (h/c)-haired woman doesn't know the extent of his injuries, but the way he put it, he was gravely wounded. Even if he could be honorably discharged, his wounds make living life impossible. (Y/n) hated having to think about him in this state, but that's all she had in her mind. The thought of him being confined to a bed all his life, drinking medicine to overcome the pain.

It hurt her.

Though, the thought of him dying too, hurt her just as much. 

(Y/n) placed the letter against her lips, giving him her usual send-off. "I pray for your recovery, Jones," the young woman would say. She knew the inevitable was coming, but she wanted to believe that he was able to change his mind and fight for his life. The last letter in the box might be proof that he's moved on from his beloved and he went on to live a long, prosperous life. 

Despair lingered around her as she tucked the piece of paper back into its envelope. She stared at the aged paper for a bit before hiding it in her drawer. She lingered at her bed for a moment, as she felt a presence surround her. She could only smile before she'd shed a tear and cry out the emotions in her chest. 

She'd muster her feelings at some point and put them all in a bottle for future use. (Y/n) left her bed, with her phone in her hand, and went to the bathroom to freshen up once more. She put on a bit of makeup and redness-correcting eyedrops to mask the fact that she ended up crying this morning. A notification ping echoed in the bathroom.

Matthew must be here. 

He organized another hang-out with her today because he said he was feeling "a bit lonely". (Y/n) knew it was just a way for him to check up on her. He was aware that they were coming up on the last few days of her obsession. He wanted to make sure that she can get out of this situation alive and well. With the way (Y/n)'s been acting, both of them knew that it'll end in an emotional spiral. Matthew wanted to be there for her when that happens. 

The young woman stared at her appearance in the mirror and tugged the corners of her lips to fabricate a smile. It was good enough to wear. She sent her friend a text saying that she was going to get ready. She changed her clothes, fixed her hair, and made her way out with her belongings at hand. Matthew was standing outside her door, holding his fluffy, white dog with the leash.

"Hey. There you are," Williams grinned as he sent a wave to his friend. "Come on. If we don't leave soon, the beach is gonna be filled with a ton of people and we won't have a spot for us." Kuma barked in agreement with his owner, causing (Y/n) to genuinely smile.

"I've already got my things so we can start heading out now." The young woman went over to the Canadian's car and placed her few things in the trunk. Kuma had already hopped onto the backseat, already secured and ready for the trip. (Y/n) rode shotgun with Matthew in the driver's seat. She was given the aux cord so she played whatever music interested her at the moment. 

The drive to the beach was long but comfortably quiet. Somewhere through the drive, (Y/n) managed to fall asleep. It may have been general fatigue that knocked her out, or maybe it was due to the crying session she had prior to the trip. Maybe it was simply a little bit of both. 

Matthew often looked to his side to check on his friend. His focus was on the road, sure, but when they were stopped at a light, he would take his glances. A sigh left him when he saw signs of what happened to her before he appeared at her door steps. Despite her going to therapy, it was still taking a toll on her. Matthew would know. He's been there before, though it wasn't as heavy hitting as hers. 

He's always pondered how she got here, but he never fully dwelled on the thought for too long. Many people have different ways of getting to that point. It would be hard for him to understand where she was. She was dealing with a tough situation and he was only going to be there to support her.

Not question her. 

The day was still relatively young when they arrived at the beach. It took them a while to get a parking spot but they were here. Just the two of them, at the beach. Other people were near the shore, like families and couples that took their afternoon strolls. (Y/n) sat around with Kuma as Matthew set up most of their things, from the umbrella to the cooler that held the snacks he prepared earlier today.

Kuma panted, feeling the heat warm him up. With a dog that had such a thick coat, he was barely surviving in this heat. What kept him going was the fan that had been pointed at his face. (Y/n) sat by the hound's side, staring at the clear blue water surrounding the grey beach. The sounds of people and the water comforted (Y/n), but there was a thought that stayed in her mind. 

Jones.

A few letters ago, he mentioned pretty beaches and how he's always wanted to visit one with his significant other. As she stared at the water that threatened to come by their towels, she thought of him and his wish. She wanted to fulfill that with him, but she wasn't his. She could be, in her mind, but in reality, she can't. 

Her eyes envisioned him with her. The image she's created of him may not be true to life, but this was her Jones. His glasses were pristine and his smile was stuck on his face. He wore his green uniform, his hat, and sparkling medals on his chest. He was with her and he was well. Though the image of him disappeared when Matthew called out to her.

"You're blanking out," the blonde told her. He sat in front of her, with his back turned toward the waves. "Here. I got some snacks from the cooler. I dunno if you've already eaten yet, but it'd be nice to have something for the stomach, you know." Matthew had a sweet smile on his face as he handed his friend the food he packed for today. (Y/n) stared at it and nodded her head.

"Thank you, Mattie." She'd take a bite and feel slightly better. She'd turn her gaze away to look at the spot Jones had been. Matthew noticed her look and did the same, finding no one near them, though he could find a couple playing in the water. Her eyes were still blank and it looked like she was having a hard time focusing on the moment.

"I know there's something on your mind, (Y/n)," Matthew confronted her. 

"I'm fine," she mumbled.

Matthew noticed the sign and decided to give up almost immediately. He'd wait for her to tell him. It's no use trying to pry open something that didn't want to be opened. He would sit next to his dog, Kuma, who was now laying down on the blankets. The fan that kept him cool was still whirring in front of him as he took his afternoon nap. 

The Canadian stared out to sea, watching the water crash onto the shore. (Y/n) was doing the same, except her eyes saw something different. Her beloved soldier was there, playing in the water, smiling at her. His speck of green stood out in the sea of blue.

She was seeing things. 

The duo shared the silence as they sat around. (Y/n) broke their peace by saying, "Did you know...the letters mentioned a beach." Matthew looked to his friend, his eyebrow arching, asking her to continue. 

"Jones...he wanted to go to the beach with his girlfriend," (Y/n) continued, "he was stationed at a beach when he wrote that letter. All he ever thought about was her, you know. It pains me a lot to think about it. How he might not even get to see her at a beach." The young woman hugged her legs, but her (e/c)-colored eyes continued to stare at the sea. 

"I opened another letter today. The second to last one." There was hesitance in her voice. "He's dying, Matthew. And I'm scared that the last letter- tomorrow's letter- might be his written will." The man she was talking to would continue to be silent so she could voice her thoughts. That's all she needed to do anyway, to make herself feel just a bit better.

"I don't want to lose him. You know this already. That last letter is going to be the death of me."

Matthew's periwinkle eyes stared at his friend as he listened to her. "You know you have to let him go eventually. You can't let some dead soldier hang onto you and break you like this, (Y/n)." He hated seeing her go through something as painful as this, especially since her pain is coming from a dead man. Matthew can't confront the dead. 

(Y/n) dipped her head and let out a muffled, "I know." Her heart broke just a bit when Matthew spoke to her. She knows he's right, but she's stubborn. She'll let Jones break her anyway. Matthew reached out to her and placed a hand on her back. He could feel her breaths becoming shallow. She was going to lose it. The blonde did his best to comfort her, through small rubs and pats on her shoulders. 

He'd help her with breathing exercises and they worked, for the most part. It's hard to get rid of her thoughts about Jones though. Matthew didn't know that the beach would have such an effect on her. He should have planned this outing better. A hum leaves the Canadian as he looked at his friend. The friends connected gazes and smiled at each other. 

"I'm okay," (Y/n) would tell him. They knew both she wasn't, but she was going to try and be better. Looking back at the sea, she'd spot the blue again. The speck of green was still there and the faint apparition of Jones lingered in the water. He no longer had a pristine uniform. Dried blood coated his haunting form and his glasses were cracked. She could never see his face but she always looked out for his smile. 

It wasn't there anymore.

(Y/n) stared at the figure in the water, before the wave crashed over him, making him disappear completely. The young woman's lips pursed together and forced a smile. She hasn't told anyone about the visions she's been seeing because she knew that people would think of her as insane. No one would believe her if she said she was being haunted by the object of her fascination.

They spent today's afternoon lazing around the shore under the umbrella and playing. They build sandcastles and buried each other under the sand to distract (Y/n) from her thoughts. At the end of it all, they walked Kuma down the shore, letting the heated pup wet his feet to cool down. Kuma ended up being drenched in seawater, which Matthew had to clean once they were home.

To say that the beach hangout was a success would be a lie, but (Y/n) enjoyed spending time with her friend, Matthew. The blonde walked her to her home and made sure to give her his usual send-off for the night. He gently wrapped his arms around her for an embrace and kept her close for a bit. (Y/n) relished the hug and laughed a little when she felt her friend squeeze her.

"Good night, Mattie," she would say.

"Good night, (Y/n)," he'd reply back. "I trust you. Please don't do anything bad."

"I won't."

The two friends drifted apart and sent each other their final waves for the night. (Y/n) disappeared inside her cold, dark home. She lingered in there for a moment with her eyes scanning her surroundings for a hint of green amongst the void. Nothing, per usual. She turned on the lights of her home and got ready for dinner and her nightly routine.

It was the same old. Nothing ever changed. 

The young woman would rest her head on her pillow and stare at the void that wrapped around her. She'd feel pressure at the foot of the bed, finding a glimpse of green. 

This is the third time- now.

He moved ever so slightly in the dark. His broken glasses gleamed underneath the moonlight. (Y/n) stared at him before she moved. Her hand met his bloodied fingers halfway and they lingered there.

He was cold, colder than her freezer, colder than the artic, but the smile he held was warm and comforting. The young woman couldn't tell if she was hallucinating things or if his apparition was truly there. He began to shift into a blur the more she stared at him. 

"Stay-" (Y/n)'s meek voice called out. His form could only smile.

Then he was gone. 

"No-" she'd whispered after. Her fingers curled into a fist as she hugged her legs. Tears swelled in her eyes as she cried. This night would leave her with no sleep, as her tears and thoughts kept her awake. There was no need to worry though. She doesn't have work for another day, anyway.

The sun would rob the moon's spotlight, filling the world with light. It would seep through the tree that hid (Y/n)'s window. The young woman was at her bed as still as a rock. Her eyes were unmoving, staring at the ceiling, and waiting for the day to pass. 

Today was the last day, then after that, no more letters. A year has passed already, but it didn't feel like it. 

She'd lose energy but she could never regain it. (Y/n) lacked the need to sleep as her mind was constantly busy. She'd move a limb, then another, until she's fully out of bed. She moved like the undead, trudging along her floor until she managed to limp to the bathroom. The darkness of it all gave her comfort. Her (e/c)-colored eyes looked for green but found nothing. 

With a sigh, she turned on her lights and continued what she would usually do in the morning. (Y/n) corrected the bags under her eyes and practiced smiling. She's been doing this for a while now and there hasn't been significant progress. She could never feel truly happy.

Approaching the final day made her more miserable. 

But unlike Jones, she has too much to live for. She needed to keep fighting whatever was bringing her down.

Once finished, she appeared in her bedroom again. (Y/n) looked at the spot she knew held the box. Her stare was intense and her body was as still as she could get. Anxiety filled her stomach immediately but she reached forward and opened it. 

The last letter sat comfortably in its spot, waiting to be opened. (Y/n) didn't want to, but she knew she had to. Biting her lip, she plucked it from the bottom. There was something odd about this one. It was heavier than the others. It threw the woman off, but she pushed forward and she gently ripped the envelope.

The letter had been folded neatly inside and there were a few souvenirs too. The young woman knew that the man enjoyed sending home gifts, but these were different. She opened the paper and found dog tags and a black and white photo. (Y/n) looked at the photograph first. 

There was a man posing for his photo. He appeared to have blonde hair and bright eyes with small, square glasses sitting atop his nose. His complexion was clear and pale but flushed cheeks. He had a gleaming smile that completed everything. He wore a dark uniform that held no badges or metals. The soldier was young, handsome, and didn't have a care in the world.

(Y/n) turned the photo around to find writing in pen that said, "Me! Send copies to Ma, Pa, and Mattie when able!" There was no mention of a feminine name anywhere, but that wasn't what she was hyper-fixated on right now. Her thoughts revolved around the idea that she can put a face to him now. Her heart jumped for joy, but at the same time, she brought herself down. 

This was the last letter. She can't envision him after this is over. The fact made her emotional, which was enough to put some tears in her eyes. She placed his photo down and looked at the dog tags that accompanied the letter. 

"Alfred F. Jones," she whispered. That was his name. Alongside it were numbers, his blood type, his religion, and another name, though this didn't seem like his girlfriend or anything. She was thinking it was his mother since it said "Mrs. F. Jones."

(Y/n) could be heard muttering his name over and over again. She still had the urge to call him Jones. Placing the memorabilia down, she turned her attention to the letter. It was pristine, but she finally noticed there were a few blood splotches on the edges. It's aged, dried blood, which was a cause of concern for her, but it didn't matter. 

None of it matters anymore. 

"Good morning, Alfred," she'd greet. It was much more personal now. "How are you doing, darling?" She'd try to make herself feel better, but the greeting caught her off guard. It sounded like he was distancing himself away. He didn't call her angel anymore.

To whoever finds these letters, I hope they reach you well. I don't have that much time left in me, but I'd like to write down my feelings and my thoughts. I'm not asking for big audience, but if there is one, and you're the one, please listen to me. That's all I ask. I've been given a lot of paper, so I have enough to put down everything. At least I think so anyway. They say I can always ask for more, but I doubt I can. Breathing is getting significantly harder for me, but I'm trying to live just so I can write. I'm trying to unpack so that in the next life, I'll be given a fresh start. I want to leave everything here in my old body. I don't necessarily believe in the afterlife or in reincarnation, but I just want to leave my baggage here. Experiencing the near end of my life has given me a lot to think about. I've always thought it's impossible to find clarity in death, but now I'm getting first-hand experience and I can't help but think it's funny. I used to think it was strange but now I'm going through it right now. I've found peace in knowing that I'm going to leave soon and that has given me a clear head. I hope this is the first letter you've read because the past ones, the ones that will be sent to my home with this one, are filled with nonsense from a grieving madman. I don't care if you send these letters to a museum, just don't send them to my parents. Send them specifically to my house. If they've seen that their son has gone utterly insane over the years would hurt so much. You can put this anywhere you want, actually, just as long as someone reads them. It could be you, it could be anyone willing to listen to me. I just want to be heard. I want to be seen. I want others to know how a man can suffer because of this war. I don't know when you'll be finding these. You could be reading this years after I die. Just- you know, if you do happen to see my letters, please treat them with care, or not. Throw them away, just- please read them or send them somewhere where people actually care. You can even send it to a museum or something.  Leave the rest of these letters unopened so the curators can read them. They'll treat these with care, that is if they are still in good health and these letters are legible, but if you want, you can also take care of them. I don't know why, though, but if you think it's fine then be my guest. But if this is the last letter you've read, then I have a few words to tell you. Thank you, and I'm sorry you've had the misfortune of knowing me. I appreciate the fact that you've read everything because that's all I needed. I just needed someone to listen to me, even if it'll take days or years for someone to find these. You could be anyone, really, and I wouldn't care who you are because regardless, I appreciate you. I'm grateful for your patience and your sympathy because the Lord knows someone like me doesn't deserve it. The thought of someone finding these letters and reading them is enough to make me happy on my deathbed. Thank you so much for taking the time of your day to listen to me and my stupid, incoherent ramblings. Hey, you've been with me the entire journey. You made it this far. If I caused something to you while you're reading the past few letters please know I didn't mean to hurt you. I appreciate your sympathy, I genuinely do, but I am deeply sorry for the pain I may have caused. I've caused too much to other people and the last thing I want is for another person to be hurt because of me.

There were tear stains on the next few pages, but they were still legible. The paper seems fresh too, but it looks somewhat aged.

My darling angel, This is to you personally. I know you're reading this because you've come this far and haven't discarded me yet. I have one thing to confess and I hope that you can listen to me and forgive me. I've hurt you the most and I realize this might hurt you even more. Please, I ask for you to forgive me and listen to the words I have to say. Throughout my life, I didn't think angels ever existed. I'm not a religious man myself, but through the course of the war, I've started to believe God placed an angel to watch over me. You kept me happy and made me sane when things were rough. But the thing is- You never existed. You were never a physical person. In a way, you made me go mad. With some clarity, I realize that creating you was just my brain reaching for ways to feel better. Maybe my silent prayers were heard and God actually placed an angel to be with me from the start. Maybe I willed you into existence. But- You initially came in a form of a joke. I pretended to have a girlfriend because I felt left out. I thought it was funny to pretend to have someone to love. The rest of my friends had their own girlfriends to write to, but I was the only one who didn't have one. So I decided to play along and pretend that you existed, but then the more I wrote to you, a person who doesn't even exist, you became something to me.  You never had a physical body because you stemmed from my imagination. I projected to you the qualities I had. I also gave you hobbies I wanted to see. I believed that you were listening to me because Lord knows that's all I needed while I was fighting this damn stupid war. I made myself fall in love with the idea of you, which is by far the stupidest but the best thing I've done in my life. While I was thinking of you, you felt so real to me. It came to the point where I thought you were a living, breathing person that could actually write back to me. Everyone else was getting letters and I didn't. Not getting anything from you made me frustrated, but I held on to you so much because you're all I had. It pains me that you never existed, because I would have loved you so much, wholeheartedly. I would have done everything for you because the idea of you made me so happy. You were my everything.  I find my words weird and crazy the more I write them now, but this is how I genuinely feel. I fell in love with a figment of my imagination, but if by some miracle, you truly exist, I would have loved to see you. To hold you, to bring you out on dates, to kiss you. I want to do everything with you and I hope that in another life, I get to meet you. God has to be merciful enough to give me another chance. Maybe I'll win the life lottery in the next one, eh? I genuinely am sorry for the pain I've caused you. I've tried making it up to you. I promised you that I'd be the moon to your stars, that I'd be there to protect you. I've done all I can. I don't know if I could ever become a ghost, or whatever the hell exists out there, but if I could, I would be there at night, watching over you. I'd keep any dangers away from you because I'd hate to see you get hurt.  I've already hurt you so much, I don't want anything else harming you.  I know it's a lot to unpack. I know I've rambled. I know I've said a lot of shit, but it's all how I feel. This is the baggage I'll leave this body. I know I don't have that much time anymore so I'll cut it here. Breathing is getting hard for me but hey, I think I'll die peacefully. Thank you, my darling. I hope I get to see you in another life. I'll find my way to you again. I promise. I love you. Lovingly, and always forever yours, Alfred

Silence hung in (Y/n)'s bedroom as she stared at the letter in her hands. He was right. There is a lot to unpack, but the young woman doesn't have enough strength to handle it right now. Her vision is blurred with her tears, which dripped down to the paper. Her hands were shaking and soon enough her body would follow. 

Heat seeped through her room, but the area in front of her was deathly cold. Rubbing tears from her eyes, she could see just a bit clearer. Before her was an apparition of Alfred. He wore a clean, green uniform with brand-new glasses. The rest of him was in black and white, mimicking his appearance in his photograph.

Alfred knelt in front of her with his hands cupping her own. He held his usual bright smile but tears also ran down his cheeks. 

"I love you too, Alfred," she'd whisper. "I loved you so much."

They stared into each other's eyes. Slowly, he'd rise and press his lips against hers. 

A final parting gift.

The young woman would take at this moment and she'd close her eyes. They lingered for a bit before he'd leave. There were no more traces of him in her vision. She stared at the clear floor. The perpetual cold temperature of her room disappeared completely and the heavyweight that constantly rested on her shoulders disappeared.

Her mind was given clarity, but her chest was heavy with grief. This was the general grief experienced after losing a loved one though. It wasn't like the one she's felt over the past few months. She didn't feel the world on her shoulders anymore.

But this was at the cost of Jones. 

He no longer haunted her.

Perhaps the remnants of his soul have served their purpose and have gotten what they wanted.

(Y/n) smiled as she blankly stared at the spot Alfred knelt at. She'd eventually approach her door to try and get her day started. To make herself think about something else. To start the process of healing. Before she could leave she'd hear a whisper in her ear.

"I loved you too, (Y/n)."

[kalorphic]

Ella!!! im already SOOO obsessed with the demo i genuinely love K so so much 💗💗💗

noah wanting to get ice cream right after killing someone? yeha that’s icon behavior sorry i don’t make the rules!! & once again jess & salan UGH i love their banter jess is an icon <33

& ugh now ……. my beloved K oh my god im seriously so down bad for them 😔 i played with my beloved camille first & the way she’s so sweet & lowkey shy & k just hates her….. and then the ‘event’ ….. bestie i NEED to know what it is omg!!! and the guilt k has…… that line ‘their best friend, their protector, their guide’ …… SCREAMING CRYING 😭😭😭😭 oh my girl is gonna be so hurt i already know it the angst is gonna be so scrumptious!! and k has a room for the mc???! and their favorite snacks?!? when is it my turn 😔 and the homemade friendship bracelets…… the thot of k making a friendship bracelet for the mc….. and even though it turns out shit cami loves it…… UGH THEY ARE MY EVERYTHING 💗💗💗 and of course camille is a sweetheart so she thanked Cody for waking her up ….. and then they used her nickname & she was so happy ugh <3333

and then i played with my girl jade <3333 kalix & them having matching sun & moon necklaces screaming crying 😭😭😭 also the way with jade it’s like she’s stoic off the bat & so not ready to deal with K’s tantrums….. the rivals to lovers arcs of it all!!! and the way Cody & her lowkey hate each other gosh I’m so so excited!!! anyways sorry for rambling but YEAH genuinely loved the demo so so much I cannot wait for chapter 1!!!

Mal!! Thank you so much, omg!! 🤍🤍🤍

Noah knows exactly what they want in all aspects of their life lol. They literally dragged a very annoyed Manon to an ice cream parlour and ordered about 12 scoops like a giddy child while Manon got 2 scoops (and then complained for hours about a stomach ache which brought Manon great joy lol). As for Jess and Sal, I absolutely have to bring them back and let MC react to them because I really loved writing them! <3

Ugh I love Camille so much, she’s too good for early!K 😩 I’m sorry I put her through that (and will again when MC ruminates on things). As for the event…all will be revealed in good time 👀👀👀 K is very protective of MC, but writing I realised that MC is the true protector in this relationship and K knows it. They’re the all-seeing eye keeping K safe in the most dangerous of situations, which makes K even more guilty because they know how helpless MC is going to feel.

The angst scenes are going to kill me, I just know it 😭 but yeah, K has a huge house, they absolutely had to give MC their own room (and an en suite), cupboards, and space in the fridge. Any less would be unforgivable. As for the friendship bracelets, I thought the idea of K being terrible at making them would really annoy the perfectionist in them, but the sight of MC wearing it and loving it anyway, would always manage to make them smile. And Cody was 100% internally dying after using Camille’s nickname without thinking, but they definitely always call her by her nickname in their head, so the slip of the tongue was bound to happen lol!

I do not blame Jade for not wanting to deal with K’s shit lol! But that progression from that to them having matching necklaces is so good !! It makes me wonder how Jade would react to K’s inner thoughts about them 👀 LMAO rip to Jade and Cody having to live together 😭

Please never apologise for rambling !! I always love reading your thoughts on things, it’s always so fun and detailed <33 I’m glad you enjoyed the update!

[glassedice]

An overview of Azur Lane characters and their Zodiac Signs (Part 2)

And here I am, coming back to make another thread of paragraphs examining the Zodiac signs of real ships and seeing how it's potentially applied to their Azur Lane side. I've been sort of reluctant to make a second post given the far-fetched claims I made on these ships that would get further convoluted to fit an Astrological sign's narrative, as much of a coincidence their traits would sound, especially on a concept I still find myself at odds to believe and use with such confidence on literal weapons of massive destruction.

Oh well, given the amount of shipgirls I've noticed having an outwardly connection to the Zodiac sign their real counterpart was assigned at launch, I was unable to hold myself again, and I decided to go even further and longer with the thoughts I'll be expressing on this post. Before anyone scrolls through this post, I recommend to read my previous thread briefly adding context to the use of this tool. Furthermore, I'll add more additional information regarding the history and use of Zodiac signs to understand the more complex details ships will be given into.

Without further ado, let's begin with the addition of planets in Astrology according to easy descriptions coming from handy websites. Again, if you know this stuff already, skip the next paragraphs until I talk about the ships:

"To the Ancient Greeks who learned from the Babylonians - the earliest astronomers/astrologers - this group consisted of the five planets visible to the naked eye and excluded Earth, plus the Sun and Moon. Although the Greek term planet applied mostly to the five 'wandering stars', the Ancients included the Sun and Moon as the Sacred 7 Luminaires/7 Heavens (sometimes referred to as "Lights",) making a total of 7 planets. The ancient Babylonians, Greeks, Persians, Romans and others thought of the 7 Classical Planets as gods and named their 7 days of the week after them. Astrologers retain this definition of the 7 Classical Planets today.

To ancient astrologers, the planets represented the will of the deities and their direct influence upon human affairs. To modern astrologers, the planets can represent basic drives or urges in the subconscious, or energy flow regulators representing dimensions of experience. They express themselves with different qualities in the 12 signs of the zodiac and in the 12 houses. The planets are also related to each other in the form of aspects." - Wikipedia

This is where the stereotypical funny comes: For every of the four categories (Fire, Water, Earth, Air) the twelve Zodiac signs are located, there is going to be a ruling planet for every one of them that will further influence the traits of each sign according to the qualities of the planet in question; If a sign like Aquarius is often known for its eccentricity and notable intelligence among the people they are surrounded with, whether as a leader or preceptor, then it's going to get further deepened by the planet they are ruled upon: Uranus.

Creativity, Philosophy, Abstractionism, and a view of life influenced either by their own individualism or collective convictions and sense of morality is influenced by the need to change and introspective self-growth that Uranus provides because it's tied to Openness. For people outside its perception, Aquarius might be seen as a fascinating individual that offers an unique perspective to stuff normally everyone would pass along as trivial, mostly because of their inquisitive need to explore horizons of the human mind. It sounds ridiculously crammed and dumb, but normally this is how it always worked. A Zodiac sign doesn't merely work by being as it is, but it's done by multiple facets that gets even more complex to analyze and categorize (Sun, Moon, Rising), but I'll talk about that later.

For now, let's begin with a character I've been circlejerking their troubled personality since I started the game three years ago, and it's one that feels like they literally took the stereotypes of the Zodiac sign the real ship was assigned into, and made it real:

HMS Dido (37) Date of launch: 18 July, 1939. Astrological sign: Cancer. Planet in rule: The Moon.

To sum things up, Dido's personality is the epitome of complete and ruthless Autophobia plaguing her life, as for what's motivating her pursue for perfectionism regarding her duties as a royal maid. Her fear of abandonment makes up her sole motivation to reach perfection on herself, to feel like she's important and worthy of her place as a head maid capable of doing everything she's asked to do, and even things that are not her matter at all; Her desperate need for a sense of purpose and usefulness around those she cares deeply about also drives her insecurities even further, as far as to turn her into a paranoid believing for any mistake she does, or lack of orders she's given, the greater the possibility of being dumped by the commander grows, and so she keeps trying even harder to gain the attention of the player at any cost, regardless of the order. It gets worse when it's further exposed her grudge or upright jealousy towards other fellow maids, believing they don't work as efficient as she does and they don't deserve as much attention as they get from the commander. Overall, she's the concept of anxiety turned into a pitiable character that you just can't help feeling overwhelmed at her unavailability to rest a moment in her life out of fear that no purpose leads to oblivion, and oblivion leads to death. . Now, about the sign of Cancer:

"The self-awareness of a Cancer is like the tides–constantly moving in and out of focus. Their personalities are layered. Cancers have many moods, some of which are contradictory, but they also have a deep, core self that persists.

Cancers are weighed down by their own sorrows and the sorrows of those around them. They are frequently haunted by grief. It’s hard for them to share their pain with others, and they are often afraid to be vulnerable because they carry a fear that people will use their weaknesses against them. Cancers have learned to hide their pain to avoid burdening anyone else. They pretend they’re okay when they’re not.

Their emotions are like an exposed nerve. Cancers can feel everything. They’re like a tuning fork that vibrates at the slightest provocation. They tend to carry deep grudges because they can’t forget the emotional sting of even a slight." - costarastrology.com

As expected, Cancer is nothing short of someone that, in a stressful environment, can be overly protective and emotionally bleak due to their own insecurities. Their level of awareness will also determine the level of psychological pain suffered in stressful situations, often leading to catastrophic results if they are still in development. At their worst, they can be obsessive, manipulative, jealous, and an emotional fighter for anything that could feed their ego. It gets worse as the sign itself is influenced by their ruling planet The Moon, which is tied to Feeling and further makes their emotional output more intense, depending of which emotion is the strongest: Since the only thing Dido feels is anxiety and sadness, it's safe to assume she has it worse than anyone could ever imagine. In that sense, Dido is a living stereotype of the worst traits coming from her Zodiac sign. She cannot bring herself to rest a single moment in her life in hopes her pursue for perfectionism will make her feel less worthless and 'trash' to the eyes of the commander. She should seek therapy sessions with August von Parseval, if you ask me.

... Now now, for the character I've been waiting the most to post for unfortunate reasons shown below (ugh):

USS New Jersey (BB-62) Date of launch: 7 December, 1942. Astrological sign: Sagittarius. Planet in rule: Jupiter.

Ugh… I was thinking of making a separate post solely extrospecting her, but I'll leave that up for later and just make a quick summary on her personality: Her extroversion makes her both a free-spirit lover of life and a weirdo/burden to the eyes of Saratoga, as well as being a source of worries for Ticonderoga. Judging by her dialogue and animation videos alone, she's shown to be someone that's drawn to countless interests and ways of living her life, ranging from excess of candy with a total dedication to ice cream, to being a cinephile of whom you wonder if she has a Letterboxd account (most likely having basic kino as her favorite films🚬). If you don't get any idea of how to live by yourself, try asking her a bit of an advice, and she'll immediately throw one thousand and fifty-five ideas of living your life right at your face without a chance to say stop. While she is an emotionally expressive and honest ship, she also tends to be an eccentric person capable of overwhelming others with her personality; Her enthusiasm and desire to explore makes her a reckless person in domestic terms, often getting Ticonderoga to structure plans for her and coming to her rescue at times she's in a crisis. Make it short, she's emotionally intelligent, but so childlike that could either be tolerable to some people, or downright excessive to others. Up to the public's perception.

Now, about her Zodiac:

"Sagittarians are the ultimate empiricists. They will always choose principles over feelings and will often question who they are. They move from job to job, philosophy to philosophy, belief to belief. They are explorers of the human condition and are unafraid of change. Sagittarians feel like the world is their playground. They love to explore the unknown. At their core, they want to understand how the world works. On an unbounded quest to discover the whole of the universe inside of themselves, Sagittarians are unshackled from any particular worldly attachment. They are reckless in their pursuit of what they want, and often end up doing and experiencing things that defy conceptions of the possible.

Sagittarians are explorers. They are both the fearless adventurers and the jaded critics. They understand that knowledge comes in two forms: the shallow, disposable kind that comes from external sources, and the kind that comes from within. Sagittarians know that external knowledge can be easily gained while internal knowledge is exponentially deeper and more powerful.

Sagittarians can be overly aspirational. They want to believe so intensely that they can transcend the limitations of reality that it’s hard for them to accept life's simple joys. Sagittarians can be so focused on achieving their goals that they don’t stop to appreciate the small victories along the way. At times, their high standards make them seem dismissive and arrogant." - costarastrology.com

Tell me that Zodiac was a mere coincidence.

I BEG YOU.

The only difference between her personality and her Zodiac is that she's a very devoted individual, both to her convictions and to you post-oath, albeit a bit obsessive, but harmless in the end. On the other hand, an unhealthy Sagittarius is often paired with Libra with infamous stereotypes of being unreliable partners that cannot bring themselves to commit in long-term convictions, not just in relationships but to their own sense of personality. With such differences in mind, bringing gifts to fellow ships, watching films with her best ship friends, and committing herself to protect her companions, regardless of the methods, NJ is someone that made terms with her own causes and does everything she can to make her view of life as upbeat as ever, as bleak as it can be during war. More so, since her planet in rule as Sagittarius is Jupiter, which is tied to Protection, it's clear she's someone that places an important emphasis into her role as an Iowa-class battleship that comes to aid and uphold her Eagle Union values, as well as valuing the emotional connection she's gotten with her fellow ships and the commander. Clear and louder, almost an embodiment of the Sagittarius description, she's a free-spirit ship in search of emotionally meaningful adventures that takes the best traits of her sign in addition of upholding her commitments, like a very healthy person would do. What an interesting overview, I must say.

...

God fucking dammit, I went a lot longer than my previous post, even when I deleted as much filler paragraphs as I could. Welp, no point in crying over trivial details as these.

Once again, I wholeheartedly thank my sister for bringing this perspective on me, and studying these strange connections that just can't stop coming. Dido & New Jersey's Zodiac turned out highly stereotypical, which was either intentional or a coincidence bigger than anything I've seen so far. I'm actually surprised I haven't seen anyone ever bring up these two with their real-life counterpart Zodiac sign, given how utterly similar their description were to the personality Yostar built for them two, especially for New Jersey itself, which my sister noticed that connection first and made me see this topic in the first place. I wonder how many more shipgirls will have their personality connect to the potential Astrological mark the real ships got at the day of their launch, given the astronomical mistake Marblehead did by remotely referencing that goddamn concept that led me into this perpetual rabbit hole. Either way, I'll still be on my way to keep researching this subject, as idiotic as it may be. For now, I'm done in posting about this topic until I list more facts and ships matching their Zodiac, which might take a week or two to structure another part I could think of.

Without further ado, hasta luego.

[catolinewsdailyreadings]

Saturday of the Twenty-Fifth Week in Ordinary Time

Readings of Saturday, September 28, 2024

Reading 1

ECCL 11:9—12:8

Rejoice, O young man, while you are young  and let your heart be glad in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart, the vision of your eyes; Yet understand that as regards all this God will bring you to judgment. Ward off grief from your heart and put away trouble from your presence, though the dawn of youth is fleeting.

Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the evil days come And the years approach of which you will say, I have no pleasure in them; Before the sun is darkened, and the light, and the moon, and the stars, while the clouds return after the rain; When the guardians of the house tremble, and the strong men are bent, And the grinders are idle because they are few, and they who look through the windows grow blind; When the doors to the street are shut, and the sound of the mill is low; When one waits for the chirp of a bird, but all the daughters of song are suppressed; And one fears heights, and perils in the street; When the almond tree blooms, and the locust grows sluggish and the caper berry is without effect, Because man goes to his lasting home, and mourners go about the streets; Before the silver cord is snapped and the golden bowl is broken, And the pitcher is shattered at the spring, and the broken pulley falls into the well, And the dust returns to the earth as it once was, and the life breath returns to God who gave it.

Vanity of vanities, says Qoheleth, all things are vanity!

Responsorial Psalm

PS 90:3-4, 5-6, 12-13, 14 AND 17

R./ In every age, O Lord, you have been our refuge.

You turn man back to dust, saying, “Return, O children of men.” For a thousand years in your sight  are as yesterday, now that it is past, or as a watch of the night. R./ In every age, O Lord, you have been our refuge.

You make an end of them in their sleep; the next morning they are like the changing grass, Which at dawn springs up anew, but by evening wilts and fades. R./ In every age, O Lord, you have been our refuge.

Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain wisdom of heart. Return, O LORD! How long? Have pity on your servants! R./ In every age, O Lord, you have been our refuge.

Fill us at daybreak with your kindness, that we may shout for joy and gladness all our days. And may the gracious care of the LORD our God be ours; prosper the work of our hands for us! Prosper the work of our hands! R./ In every age, O Lord, you have been our refuge.

Gospel

LK 9:43B-45

While they were all amazed at his every deed, Jesus said to his disciples, “Pay attention to what I am telling you. The Son of Man is to be handed over to men.”  But they did not understand this saying; its meaning was hidden from them so that they should not understand it, and they were afraid to ask him about this saying.