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amberjazmyn · 8 months ago

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my love, my life

𝓲𝓶𝓪𝓰𝓲𝓷𝓮 - my love, my life

𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 - mentions of deaths of parents from cancer, the birth of a child and baptism of said child, non-religious mom and semi-religious dad, crying, abba music if that's a warning, medical inaccuracies when it comes to pregnancy, inaccurate mentions of coronavirus

𝓭𝓮𝓼𝓬𝓻𝓲𝓹𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 - with the lyrics of mamma mia's version of abba's song, "my love, my life", we see misha collins' younger sister, elouise collins o'shea and her husband, ollie, have their first child, a little girl called eleanor rebecca, who was born on the same day as and named after her grandmother rebecca tippens.

𝓪𝓾𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓻'𝓼 𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓮 - i've had this idea in my head for ages since i have always wanted to write something with the lyrics of "my love, my life" by abba since it's probs one of if not my absolute favourite abba song. as always, the lyrics will be in bold italics, any flashbacks or flashforwards will be in italics and year-stamped so it's not so confusing and present time of the literal baptism will be in regular font. also, just as a repeat newsflash, misha's parents, both of them, are still alive and well from knowledge. however, in this work of fiction, misha's mom rebecca and dad richard, are portrayed as passed on. also, i know misha's no longer with his ex-wife, vicki but, for the purposes of this story due to when it is first set timeline wise, misha and vicki are still together but, by the end of the story, it is then mentioned that they are no longer together like in real life since it was said that they divorced in twenty twenty-two when this particular storyline ends.

masterlist listen to "my love, my life" right here!

- - -

i've never felt this strong, i'm invincible, how could this go wrong?

december 28 | twenty twenty

elouise almost screamed but couldn't since she was back at her family home in boston, the rest of her family and her nieces and nephews in the loungeroom where her husband was. this couldn't have been the reason why elouise had been so ill recently, absolutely not was she pregnant and had been for a whole entire trimester already? there was absolutely no way that the positive pregnancy test in front of her and the messages from her obstetrician over the random boston hospital phone app that she had were telling her that she had spent the last twelve/fourteen weeks pregnant with her and her husband ollie's first child and had absolutely no idea whilst also going through the last year of her mother's life due to cancer- rebecca tippens succumbing to the horrific disease a couple of weeks ago, not even, on the fifteenth of this month.

but, it was absolutely true that elouise was pregnant with her first baby. and it was the fact that if only she found out even two weeks ago, she may have just made it in time to tell her mom about her newest grandchild. and that was what took elouise's strength and invincibility that she had built up since the death of rebecca from one hundred to zero with the click of a finger. elouise was panicking, she was bent over crying, her head resting on the bathroom sink as her iphone filmed the entire thing. she had taken the pregnancy test at first as a joke after vicki, misha's wife and elouise's sister-in-law, suggested it since vicki had recognised the way elouise was sick being the same way she was sick when she was pregnant with her and misha's first child, their eldest son, west anaximander. not once at all did elouise think she was pregnant, sure, she thought she was ill but she genuinely just thought that was due to the grief and stress she had put herself through after the death of her mom rebecca and the broken heart syndrome that her father, richard, had just recently received, a few days after supernatural's last season was announced.

no, here, here's where we belong, i see a road ahead i never thought i would dare to tread.

after elouise finished her freak-out, she realised that maybe, whilst it was a road she never thought she'd tread, it was a road she belonged driving on. wiping away her tears, elouise picked up the pregnancy test with her shaky hands and she smiled, turning the positive pregnancy test to the iphone camera as she started laughing.

whispering, she spoke up, "...ollie's going to freak the fuck out! oh my gosh, he's going to be so happy this said positive!" elouise giggled as she then looked down to her tummy which didn't even indicate a 12/14 week baby bump

elouise then realised because she was going into her second trimester, she was able to tell the rest of her family since there was now no longer any worry about her losing the baby. and then, she started crying all over again when she remembered misha and vicki. misha had always wanted his little sister to have a little baby and now, his dream was finally coming true. but, without their mom with them.

turning back to her iphone, elouise spoke up again, "i need to tell everyone! but what do i do? i can't just tell them..." elouise trailed off as she tried to think of what she could do to announce the pregnancy to the rest of her family and husband as she quickly pressed stop on her camera recording

that was when a knock sounded on her door and she almost screamed, however, the voice that followed was not who she thought it was, "...sorry, didn't mean to scare you el, it's just vicki here, are you okay? you've been in the bathroom for a while now, what did the test say?" breathing out in relief, elouise unlocked the door so her sister-in-law could let herself in

letting herself in, vicki closed the door and felt her heart sink when she saw her sister-in-law's teary face however, she wasn't ready for the scream that was to follow, "...i'm pregnant vicki!" elouise squealed out as loudly but also as quietly as possible as vicki's face lit up in excitement

"seriously? elouise, i didn't even mean to--"

"--no, don't apologise, vicki! it's a good thing that you recognised my symptoms as being the same ones you had when you were pregnant with west and maison! because i totally wouldn't have, not until i was giving birth anyway it seems like it..." elouise trailed off as vicki looked confused

"...what do you mean? you can't be that far along, could you?" vicki questioned as elouise nodded her head as vicki's eyes widened

"vic, i've been pregnant for an entire trimester...if only i found out earlier, i may have been able to tell mom..." elouise trailed off as vicki's face deflated as she moved closer to the younger blonde

"...oh, babe...elouise i am so sorry!" vicki's voice trembled as she pulled her sister-in-law in for a hug

like an image passing by, my love, my life, in the mirror of your eyes, my love, my life.

january | twenty twenty-one

elouise and ollie couldn't hide their excitement as they watched their ob-gyn do an ultrasound of their baby. after giggling over the coldness of the gel that the nurse had placed on her stomach, elouise was entranced by the image on the ultrasound screen. she couldn't believe that inside of her tummy was a growing human being. whilst it wasn't their first ultrasound of their baby, it was still something that blew the husband and wife's minds every single time they came in for a new scan.

"...mr and mrs o'shea, because of how many weeks the baby is, we are able to tell you guys the sex, is that something you want to know now or would you like to wait until the birth to find out?" the female ob-gyn questioned as elouise and ollie smiled, their excitement doubling

"may we know now?" elouise asked nervously, ollie nodding his head in agreement with his wife as the nurse smiled and nodded her own head in confirmation

"of course, you guys can! well, if you just look here, i can tell you that you are having a baby girl!" the ob-gyn was stoked to tell the new parents they were having a little girl, elouise and ollie were silenced by shock

thankfully though, they weren't silenced for too long as tears quickly slipped from the corner of elouise's eye that was closest to ollie as he wiped them away for her, "we're having a little girl, el! that's amazing, thank you, doctor!" ollie spoke up with excitement as the doctor smiled and nodded her head as she moved the probe across elouise's tummy a few more times

"my pleasure ollie and elouise, and i can already tell how loved this little munchkin is," she responded as she wiped off the residual gel that had stayed on elouise's tummy, allowing the soon-to-be mum to clean herself up properly

whilst the ob-gyn cleared her own station and led the o'shea's back to the reception desk with the little envelope with the pink piece of paper inside of it stating that their baby was a little girl, she couldn't help but feel her heart breaking for the way elouise reacted. it wasn't a secret that the collins' had just gone through a tragedy. it had been reported on by almost every single american and canadian gossip news site that misha collins and his family had lost their beloved mother, rebecca tippens. and it was obvious that finding out that elouise was now pregnant, not that long after the loss of her mom and now finding out it's a little girl would have been so conflicting and an added bag of emotions for the young girl to be carrying with her. the nurse just hoped that this child, this little girl would be the healing angel that elouise and the rest of her family needed to heal and to see the light at the end of the grieving.

and, turns out that the ob-gyn was correct, that little girl would be the healing angel that the entire collins/krushnic/tippens family needed.

i can see it all so clearly, all i love so dearly, images passing by, like reflections of your mind, my love, my life are the words i try to find, my love, my life.

february | twenty twenty-one

elouise smiled and waited patiently in the green room of an entertainment tonight interview alongside her brother's supernatural cast. she was going to announce publically, to the world, that she was pregnant after it had been rumoured. she was with the supernatural cast because the rumours had gotten so bad that the magazines and journalists had started asking the spn cast and their families about the rumours since elouise hadn't actually told any of them apart from misha and that was only because of the fact they are brother and sister. and because misha had actually found out accidentally whilst elouise was filming an ad for a clothing brand on her instagram. since elouise's last ultrasound scan when she and ollie found out she'd be having a little girl, she had blown up like a little balloon and was starting to show so, it had gotten somewhat harder to hide the bump however, she managed with an oversized white button-down with a flowy skirt. the button-down being tied at the base of her belly button which somehow hid the fact she was ballooning with her little pregnancy bump after not showing for over fourteen weeks.

"...on this evening's edition of entertainment tonight, we have my personal favourite guests in the world and they are the cast of supernatural and elouise collins o'shea. i interview them and i also find out what i'm being told is the best news in the entire world after this break so don't change this channel..." matt cohen, the interviewer announces as the cameraman then signs that it's a commercial break to which matt moves closer off his seat to speak with his former spn cast and elouise

as he spoke with his favourite guests, matt had a slight idea of what the younger girl's announcement could be but, again, he didn't want to pry nor did he wanna ruin the surprise for himself. so, he didn't even think about what the surprise announcement could even be. so, he continued his conversation like he always did, happy to catch up and also quickly sending his condolences to misha and elouise for the loss of their mom, rebecca, moments before they were back on air. misha and elouise thanked matt sweetly as they both smiled and readied themselves for the interview.

back on the air, matt smiled and introduced the segment before he handed it over to the spn cast and elouise, "...so, as i said before the break, i have the amazing cast of supernatural and the even more amazing, gorgeous young lady, elouise o'shea who is misha's little sister! so, guys, how have you all been? even though we did catch up a little during the commerical break, give us the gossip, what's been happening over lockdown?" matt questioned, getting excited as he noticed the way elouise seemed to be wanting to just already tell him and the rest of the supernatural cast and the world the big surprise news she was even in this interview for

"well, personally for the remaining supernatural cast, we've just been getting ready for our upcoming fifteenth and final season of supernatural. so, we're very very keen for everyone to see it. but, honestly, that's the only thing that's been different to what everyone else has been doing considering we've just been through lockdown just like everyone else has..." jensen chuckled as matt nodded his head and then smiled over to elouise so she could answer for herself

"...umm, personally for me, i've been writing some music in my little home studio and doing some self-tapes for some tv and movie auditions but, ollie, my husband and i also recently returned from our honeymoon since it was postponed. because, for those who weren't aware, ollie and i got married just at the very beginning of twenty-twenty so, right before covid kind of destroyed everything *giggles* and it was only in the last couple of weeks where we were able to safely have a little honeymoon a year later so we went to hawaii for a couple of weeks which was exciting..." elouise trailed off with a giggle as she had to stop herself from suddenly caressing her baby bump - a comfort thing she had since picked up ever since the belly had popped out of seemingly nowhere and instead placed her hands on the couch beside her

matt smiled sweetly with a head-nod, "...that's gorgeous, i mean, we have got some photos here and where you and ollie were staying just looks absolutely lush! but, obviously, you made sure you were completely covid safe and took all of the precautions *elouise nods her head* that's great. i'm glad you guys had so much fun considering it was still tainted due to the continuing worries of the pandemic..." matt trailed off as elouise nodded her head and smiled as she looked to misha with a cheeky smile as he couldn't hide his giggle

this, obviously, caught the attention of matt and the other costars so, he questioned it, "...what was that about, misha and elouise? care to share with the class? i feel like a teacher saying that but, care to share what's made you two giggle?" matt laughs himself as the collins siblings calm themselves down as misha speaks up

"i think elouise is just ready to reveal the surprise announcement. you see, my little sister can get quite impatient and can sometimes be close to ruining surprises if you make her wait for too long!" misha giggles as elouise shyly nods her head as matt's face relaxes and he smiles, nodding his head as the other costars are still considerably confused

"okay then elouise, come out with it. what is this big surprise announcement that you are so eager to tell us..." matt was being cheeky as elouise bit her lip as misha gripped her hand tightly and she just came out with it

and, truthfully, this was not the surprise annouoncement that matt or jared, jensen and alex thought it was going to be, "...i'm pregnant with me and ollie's first baby..." elouise trailed off, finally allowing her hands to cradle the growing baby bump, misha's hand moving back to his lap as he bit his lip to stop his smile from getting any bigger and stupid

it was silent which freaked elouise and misha out but, it didn't last for too long when matt cheered and stood up. ignoring the fact that he really shouldn't have pulled the newly pregnant woman in for a hug in regular non-covid times. but, especially now due to corona but, he'd known this girl since she was a kid when misha first introduced them to each other before matt was even a news anchor for entertainment tonight. giggling, elouise hugged the floridian host back before she moved out of the hug so she could sit back down as the other three, jared, jensen and alex were in shock at the surprise announcement. they genuinely had no idea that their costar's little sister was pregnant. they knew she had been unwell ever since the loss of her mom, rebecca, but never did they think it was because junior collins was pregnant. but now, it made so much sense to them, especially when they remembered the way vicki immediately rushed up the stairs at the slight sound commotion heard by her from the upstairs bathroom to the right on that day that the three guys came to realise as the day that elouise found out she was pregnant.

jared was the first one out of the three to stand up and pull his costars' sister in for a hug as she giggled, "...congratulations, elouise! you've been pregnant this whole time?" jared whispered as elouise giggled and nodded her head

"yeah, this whole time!" elouise giggled as jensen and alex joined seconds later in an excited group hug as misha watched on

thankfully the hug didn't last too long and matt started to just focus on this new announcement and asked all the questions, "so, elouise, how long have you been pregnant for? because from what it looks like, it looks like you've got a little bit of a bump," matt smiled as elouise smiled sweetly and nodded her head, caressing her little bump

"i found out i was pregnant on the twenty-eighth of december so, not that long after christmas and not that long after misha and i lost our mom. however, i had been pregnant for a whole trimester before finding out that day. so, if i had found out earlier, i may have had the chance of telling this wonderful news of another grandchild to my mom..." elouise trailed off as her smile stayed strong and didn't falter

"...aw, love. do you know the sex of the baby or, is that something you and ollie want to keep a secret until the birth?" matt asks cautiously as elouise nods her head, her smile growing wider as misha was now in shock, he wasn't told the sex and neither, obviously, were the other three

"yes, we do but, the surprise will be for these four, they'll need to wait until the birth but, matt, if you really can't wait that long, i can whisper it to you?" elouise giggled at the end as matt's eyes lit up as he nodded his head, not caring this was live television

matt stood up as elouise followed, grabbing the new's anchor's hands and whispering it to him, matt, if he wasn't on live television, could have burst out into tears but he managed to hold them off, "...congratulations, elouise! oh, this baby is already so loved!" matt whispered back after elouise revealed that she and ollie were having a little girl

"thank you, matt, this baby is so loved," she whispered back as they sat back down

the interview continued even though the excitement of elouise and ollie's pregnancy took over and was still a big topic of discussion on everyone's lips, they continued to mention other things that were also supposed to be talked about. like the details of supernatural's finale season that jensen mentioned and the songwriting and auditions that elouise had mentioned she'd been doing as well.

but i know i don't possess you, with all my heart, god bless you, you'll be my love and my life. you're my one and only.

present time | twenty twenty-two

elouise was running around everywhere like a headless chicken as ollie and their little baby girl stood watching. elouise was trying to sort everything out but wasn't able to due to the way she was so manic about it and, ollie called her out over it.

"...babe, babe, ELOUISE...darling, you won't be able to sort everything out before little one's baptism if you continue to be so manic over it!" ollie chuckled at the end as elouise finally stopped herself and nodded her head in agreement

"sorry babe, it's just..."

"...yeah, i get it, it's hard that she's not here but, just remember who still is here. i'm here babe, you're here, our little one is here. if you keep on freaking out, you won't be able to get anything done..." ollie trailed off before continuing

"...i know your mom wasn't so sure about our future children getting baptised into the catholic church, but the irish catholic church more specifically. but, it's truly only because of the fact that her daddy's irish and, if my own mammy wasn't so insistent, i would have also said no to this happening. but, because i'd get me arse kicked, i compromised...we compromised and said our children would only get baptised and if they so chose to be religious as they got older, they could choose..." ollie smiled as he wrapped his arms around elouise as she smiled and nodded her head

her husband was correct. the only reason why their one-year-old was getting baptised into the irish catholic church at a year old was because of the little girl's irish lineage due to her father being fully born and raised in ireland. because originally, not only elouise but ollie himself was unsure about their children being baptised when it wasn't really a thing that exisited in his wife's family.

"...so, el, what is it you need to get done before we leave?" ollie was calm and he was collected and that was truly one of the reasons why elouise fell in love with him because he always balanced out her impulsiveness and her anxiety-induced living

and, when it came to responding to her husband's question, elouise had no idea how to respond, "umm, i actually don't know..." and that was because everything that needed to be done had already been done so this very situation wouldn't happen even though it was going to happen anyway because it always did

"...thought so, and it's because everything has already been done! we should be in the car driving to the church right now for this one's christening but, because i already suspected that this was going to happen, i rang up the priest in advance just in case. so, your welcome baby, now can we make out way out of this house and to the church, please?" ollie tilted his head to the side with a cheeky smile as elouise opened and then closed her mouth and smiled, shaking her head

"thanks, ollie. i'd really be losing the plot if i didn't have you with me," elouise whispered as she moved closer to her husband and daughter, her lips almost caressing her husband's face as he pulled away with a chuckle

"not here babe, we need to go watch our daughter's christening and your welcome and i too would lose the plot if i didn't have you with me," ollie spoke as the husband and wife left it at that with their conversation and made it out of their house to their car

on their drive to the church for their daughter's christening into the irish catholic chruch, which would be photographed by people magazine, elouise felt a calm rush over her. her husband was right, she should really stop making her focus be on those who she no longer has with her. even though it included her parents, rebecca and richard, richard lost his battle with broken heart syndrome ten months after rebecca, a couple of months after elouise had given birth to her and ollie's little girl.

i held you close to me, felt your heart beat and i thought: i am free. oh yes, and as one are we in the now and beyond, nothing and no one can break this bond.

may | twenty twenty-one

elouise hadn't felt this kind of pain in her life before but, it was a pain that she was sure she never wanted to feel again...even if it meant she never gave her daughter any more siblings. but, in all truthfulness, this pain was surely going to be forgotten about any moment when she...

...hears the cries of her little baby girl for the very first time...

"...here's your little girl, elouise and ollie. isn't she just gorgeous?" hayley, elouise's midwife and smiled as she handed over the baby girl as elouise choked down a happy sob, her arms cradling her baby girl as though it was a regular instinct - as if in a past life elouise had been a mother before

"she's beautiful, oh my goodness, we made this baby, ollie!" elouise turned to her husband who smiled tearfully as he nodded his head

"yeah we did babe, we made out little miracle, babe!" ollie sniffled, wiping away a tear with his shoulder as he slowly sat himself down on the edge of the hospital bed, his hand reaching up to touch the top of his newborn's head

"wow...we're parents, ollie. we actually have our little family! we have our little dog, our husky girl bambi and now we have our little eleanor rebecca..." elouise trailed off, tears hitting her eyes as she realised she had just said the name of her baby girl out loud for the first time

and it made both ollie and hayley smile, "...so, is eleanor rebecca this little pretty's name?" she asked, rolling her wheely chair towards the computer to write up the birth certificate as both parents, elouise and ollie nodded their heads

"yeah, eleanor rebecca is her name...rebecca for her middle name since that's her grandmommy's name and because they were born on the same day and eleanor as her first name since it's my middle name," elouise explained as hayley nodded her head, knowing the significance of the little girl's name

"that's beautiful, elouise. however, because little eleanor rebecca is earlier than her due date in august, we do have to place her in an incubator, however, once she reaches a certain weight, she'll be able to leave. is that all okay?" hayley asks, knowing how daunting it can be from being so happy with your newborn in your arms to them then being taken away to a different room

and elouise and ollie smiled, both understanding that they couldn't hold onto their little girl forever like many other mommies and daddies who had their babies on time, "absolutely fine, hayley. thank you for telling us, we'll be glad to hear that she'll be able to gain some more weight since she is really tiny," elouise spoke up, only now realising just how tiny their little eleanor was as ollie too only realised

"wonderful, well, if you two want to, we can either have the grandparents and godparents meet little eleanor in here or we can place her in the incubator and have them meet her in there. which would you prefer?" hayley then asks as elouise and ollie smile, they could choose how their family meet their little bundle of joy

"we can choose?" ollie choked out in shock as hayley giggled and nodded her head with a smile, making elouise and ollie smile

"absolutely you can! however, if you do want for them to meet eleanor in here, it can only be for five minutes per person before i'd have to then take her and place her into an incubator a couple of floors above us. is that okay?" hayley questioned as ollie and elouise nodded their heads straight away

"that's absolutely fine, hayley! we just want them to see her, they've waited for so long already, i feel selfish enough making them wait whilst we have this conversation," elouise giggled as hayley nodded her head and encouraged ollie to fetch his parents, eleanor's grandparents and the godparents, who were obviously misha, elouise's older brother and jared and genevieve padalecki since misha was no longer married to vicki, his now ex-wife.

so, that's what ollie did, like the proud husband and father he was, he wiped away his tears with a tissue. placed it in his jeans pocket, gave a kiss to his two girls and rushed down the hallway to announce the happy news.

like an image passing by, my love, my life, in the mirror of your eyes, my love, my life. i can see it all so clearly, images passing by

june | twenty twenty-one

the last time elouise sat in an interview with matt cohen, she was in the second trimester of her pregnancy with her little eleanor rebecca and now, she was just a month gone from giving birth to the little girl. since it was the twenty-ninth of june, this interview today was.

and, in the audience, slightly behind the camera was her husband ollie, their little girl eleanor and eleanor's godparents misha, the padaleckis and the rest of eleanor's uncles and aunties who were jensen and danneel and other spn cast members watching the solo interview.

with the show on the air, matt introduced his guest, "...on today's show, i have my favourite guest on the show. you know her pretty well because the last time i interviewed her, it just felt like yesterday when it february, only a few months ago, she announced her first pregnancy with her husband on live television with her brother's supernatural cast...it's only elouise collins o'shea sitting with me today on our brand new couches everybody!" matt introduced as that earned a lot of applause as elouise giggled and applauded

"haha, thank you for that wonderful introduction matt, it's great to be back being interviewed by you and on this new couch, oh my goodness, so comfy!" elouise giggled after pulling out from the hug matt pulled her into as she sat back down, crossing her right leg over her left, slanting them to the side

"isn't it so comfy? i'd sleep on these couches if i could *giggles*. oh my goodness, it is so lovely to see you again and to catch up since, like already mentioned, the last time you were here, you announced that you were pregnant with you and your husband's first baby. and then just after that we spoke only briefly during my interview with misha at the end of may since you were in the background and you were just about to pop weren't you?" matt pointed and brought it back to rest on his lip as elouise giggled and nodded her head

"yes, i was about to pop! literally hours from giving birth *giggles* so, my due dat was originally in august of this year so, in two months...one month basically. but, no, the little one said absolutely not mommy, get me out of here now! *giggles* and i had to be induced and have the c-section to get her out and, she was a preemie baby but, thankfully she gained weight pretty quickly and within a couple of weeks i think, we were able to bring her back home with us," elouise nodded as she smiled as matt smiled as well

"aw, isn't the little one just gorgeous, falling asleep in daddy's arms," matt cooed, his eyes captured by the little sleeping girl as elouise's eyes followed and she nodded her head with a small giggle

"i know, i still can't believe she's ours. like, i was fine with just having our little husky, bambi for a little while before starting to try. but, apparently, we didn't even need to try," elouise giggled as matt and the audience giggled as well

"seems as though you didn't *giggles* but, back to this little bundle of joy because, you and ollie have obviously picked out a name for her, but, it's quite a special name, isn't it? would you like to tell us what the name of your beautiful little girl is?" matt introduced, even though he was already told, he was still hanging to see how the rest of the audience (minus the family who of course already knew) was going to react

"of course i can, matt. so, our little baby girl's name is eleanor rebecca o'shea *coos* and the reason why she is called eleanor rebecca is that one, eleanor, her first name, is my middle name and two, rebecca, her middle name, is the name of misha and i's mom. we also came up with that name ages ago not even thinking what day eleanor was going to be born on either..." elouise trailed off as matt smiled

"...so, what day was little eleanor born on, may i ask, elouise?" matt questioned as his eyes sparkled with excitement as elouise smiled, her concentration going to the very little girl and her brother who was teary

"she was born on the twenty-ninth of may, the same day as her grandmother, rebecca," elouise smiled, her own tears building in her eyes, managing to will them away as matt's face relaxed and he smiled sweetly

"aw, that is so special and that is crazy because that was the same day we saw you for the last time briefly in my interview with misha, elouise. so, you were moments away from popping!" matt smiled, a still of his zoom interview with misha and just a little peak of six-month about to give birth pregnant elouise

"i know, it was absolutely terrifying as well matt because it was like, the second your guys' interview finished, my contractions started. and bam, misha, myself and ollie were off to the hospital and after trying to have eleanor naturally, my midwife, hayley, came back to us and said we had to c-section because eleanor wasn't in the right position since she was so small. so, the only other safe way to get eleanor out and delivered alive was to have her c-sectioned and i'm forever grateful that we did do the c-section otherwise i wouldn't have my little love," elouise explained as matt smiled and nodded his head, the audience watching in awe

aw, bless. and speaking of the little one, how old is she now?" matt questioned as elouise's eyes widened, how old was her daughter? what day was it? was today the twenty-ninth or the thirtieth of june?

"uhh, shoot, what day is it today?" elouise asked in a hilarious panic as misha reached for his phone

"it's the twenty-ninth, el!" shouting back to his sister, elouise metaphorically clutched her pearls, grateful that her in-head counting was indeed correct along with the finger counting she hadn't been so secretive with as she liked

"oh, thank god! she is a month old! oh my goodness, i didn't count wrong!" elouise could only giggle at her baby brain in the same way she laughed over her brothers, ex-sister-in-law's as well as the rest of the spn family's baby brains when the ones that did had their children

"wow, she's already a month? that's crazy how time flies, soon it'll be two!" matt was in shock as elouise nodded her head and she turned after hearing the crowd coo in aw only to see a photo elouise had posted of the day she, ollie and little eleanor left the hospital

"i know, don't start me off, matt. it makes me so emotional that she's already a month!" elouise giggled as she turned back from the photo back to matt to continue the interview

the interview continued on smoothly, except for a couple of times when eleanor cried out for her mommy. the second time ollie had apologetically brought up the little one so she could be held by her mommy for the rest of the interview. where in which she stayed silent the rest of the interview, content in her mommy's arms, her tiny little hands gripping tightly to her mommy's pinky finger.

like reflections of your mind, my love, my life, are the words i try to find, my love, my life. but i know i don't possess you, with all my heart, god bless you.

present time | twenty twenty-two

walking into the irish catholic church with her little bundle of joy, her little eleanor rebecca, elouise was happy. she was content and she was in peace. even though none of her family, including her parents, rebecca and richard, weren't so sure on the irish catholic baptism of their granddaughter, it was still upsetting that they weren't there to witness it. because whilst they weren't really wanting it, like elouise and ollie weren't, they wouldn't have disrespected the event because they knew that it was a compromise made by the parents and grandparents of eleanor that she would be baptised and if she got older and wanted to go further in the religion or not, she had that choice to. but, honestly, elouise had truly made peace with that ages ago, way before the situation in the house had happened before they left. it was truthfully just a moment of vulnerability for elouise and she had no other way of describing it other than her missing her parents, her mom especially.

in her flowing champagne-coloured wrap dress, elouise held her daughter as eleanor's christening dress overwhelmed her because of how big it was. elouise held her as she walked through the hall of the church and towards the priest, her husband ollie and eleanor rebecca's godparents, misha and the padalecki's, jared and genevieve.

elouise smiled in a joy that could have only been described as overwhelming. she knew every single person in this church: first, her brother misha and his two beautiful now grown-up children, west and maison; the padalecki family, jared and geneiveve and their three gorgeous kids, thomas, shep and odette and last but not least, the ackles family, jensen and danneel and their three beautiful kids, jj, zeppelin and arrow. and that was just the "main" supernatural family, there was no use in introducing every single guest and their families and their plus ones that sat in this church for eleanor rebecca o'shea's christening. however, it just really reiterated to elouise how loved this little one-year-old baby girl was to so many people that weren't her direct family.

elouise basked in the flashing lights from the photographers but made sure to still shield little eleanor's face just in case the lights still frightened her like they used to. however, in a cheeky, sly move, the little one-year-old smacked her mommy's hand away and seemed to stare right down the barrel of one particular photographer's camera. of course, this shocked both mom and dad but also made them snicker at the same time as elouise then looked up and blood rushed to her ears in an instant.

elouise couldn't help the blank, emotionless stare she shared towards the female photographer that little eleanor had also seemed to be entranced by. it was just that...the young photographer looked scarily similar to her mom, rebecca tippens. that was until the young girl had completely morphed into elouise's mother and the young mom was glad she didn't completely drop her little eleanor rebecca herself.

it obviously scared the crap out of elouise that she was the only one that was seeing her own mother in this female photographer but, she continued to zone out until a little side tap from her husband, ollie. it was only then that elouise fazed out from the void she was in and noticed that the young female photographer no longer looked like her mom and continued to photograph the christening. little eleanor rebecca taking a liking to the girl.

"...oi, el, babe, what was that all about? you okay?" ollie later questioned as he held eleanor rebecca after they finished the walk back up to the church foyer now that eleanor rebecca had been christened

"yeah...yeah, i'm fine babe. just, that female photographer, the one with brown hair looked scarily similar to mom, that's all..it seemed as though little eleanor rebecca thought so too..." elouise shook her head and rubbed her eyes, feeling like she was going insane as ollie smiled, gently kissing his wife's golden hair

"...i thought i was the only one who noticed that. she did look so much like your mom, i secretly hoped she'd do the dramatic movie reveal thingy, coming out with the dramatic news that she was your long-lost sixth sibling," ollie chortled as elouise cackled, her head shaking

"oh shut up, ollie...she is not our long-lost ninth sibling, you utter doofus. besides, the more i looked at her afterwards, i saw the differences that truly sold it to me that she wasn't anyone in the family that we should have been told about," elouise giggled as she grabbed eleanor rebecca from him as ollie nodded his head

"okay, that's good to know babe, i'll be back in a moment, i promised misha and the kids that i'd touch base with them after the christening, see you soon darling, i miss my two girls already!" ollie shouted after he had left his two girls with kisses to their heads as that allowed the padalecki's to swoop in to have a conversation with the mother and newly christened daughter

"...hey, jared and gen! tom, shep and odette! did you three behave?" elouise lit up in excitement, hugging all five of them as the kids nodded their heads to their aunty elouise

"they behaved exceptionally well, elouise, they were quiet the whole entire time. and, also, just a quick note, did you notice the female photographer right at the front that looked ridiculously like your mom?" gen whispered at the end, just in case she felt like she was insane as elouise giggled and nodded her head

"good to hear they behaved and, yes, i did and so did little eleanor rebecca. did you see the way she smacked my hand away when that lady's camera started flashing?" elouise giggled as gen and jared both nodded their heads

"it was absolutely bizarre, i thought i was going crazy when i turned around to see her," jared spoke up this time as elouise nodded her head in agreement

"i thought so too! i then had that weird moment where after looking at her for too long, she actually turned into mom which was even weirder. but, i then saw the things that was the reminder that she wasn't my mom," elouise giggled as she bopped eleanor rebecca up on her hip higher since she started to slip

the padaleckis stayed to chat with elouise and eleanor rebecca until daddy had come back from his conversation with brother and the niece and nephew, misha, west and maison and happily picked up eleanor rebecca when she reached out for him. allowing elouise to build up her arm strength again after feeling like they were going to fall off.

you are still my love and my life, yes i know i don't possess you. with all my heart, god bless you, you are still my love and my life

present time | twenty twenty-two

elouise softly started to sing the song that was playing during the mamma mia: here we go again movie when she finally looked up from playing with eleanor rebecca and realised the song she had been singing the entire time...

...she had been singing along to my love, my life without even consciously realising it whilst the entire christening scene of sophie and sky's baby was going on during the duration of the song. and it reminded elouise of eleanor rebecca's christening that had just happened the day before. it was sort of ironic because the scene that was playing in front of her was the exact same scene that played in elouise's head when she saw that female photographer that looked ever so similar but yet still so different to her mother.

she then grabbed her phone and quickly put together a little instagram post dedicated to her little girl, her love and her life: eleanor rebecca.

liked by ollieoshea, misha, jaredpadalecki, jensenackles, genpadalecki and 9k others

elouisecollinsoshea you're my one and only eleanor rebecca 🤍

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ollieoshea my two beautiful girls 🤍

elouisecollinsoshea ollieoshea my beautiful man 🤍

misha absolutely gorgeous 🤍

elouisecollinsoshea misha thank you mish🤍

jaredpadalecki pretty baby girl 🤍

elouisecollinsoshea jaredpadalecki isn't she just jared 🤍

jensenackles eleanor rebecca is gorgeous, elouise 🤍

elouisecollinsoshea jensenackles i mean, her parents are also gorgeous so it makes sense

genpadalecki beautiful baby and baby momma 🤍

elouisecollinsoshea genpadalecki truth has been told 🤍

mattcohen4real eleanor rebecca is beautiful, elouise 🤍

elouisecollinsoshea mattcohen4real thank you, matt! she is truly everything i could have dreamt of for my first baby 🤍

- - -

and this is finished! woo, what a fun time writing this but it was difficult! i am also kind of proud of the kind of mamma mia/elouise moment i added in there but, i think it could have for sure been written better, right now, i like it. also, just to reiterate, misha's parents are alive and well from what we know! and also, i totally made up the fact that matt cohen has his own tv show but whatever!

ok ily bye

wc; 7337

#supernatural cast #misha collins x ofc younger sister elouise collins #jared padalecki #jensen ackles #alexander calvert #fluff but with angst if that makes sense #mattcohen #danneel ackles #genevieve padalecki

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