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curseofaphrodite · 6 months ago

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A Very Sneezy Adventure

BUCKY BARNES X READER

summary: enemies to lovers in a domestic fluff setting?? yes.

The Winter Soldier saves the day, as well as two dozen kids! Some say even Starveil was spotted in the fight against the horrific minotaur.

"Fuck off!" you yelled at the TV screen, then turned it off.

You looked around the room in distaste. Your clothes were everywhere, there was an unnatural stench in the air, and your cat was nowhere in sight.

Turns out, being a witch didn't give you an upper hand when you were sick.

You laid back on your couch, the news reporter's words echoing in your ears. Being "spotted" in a fight against the villain that you were literally assigned to take down, only to have the spotlight taken away by your rival Bucky freakin' Barnes, did not feel good.

You knew the fight went down bad because you were sick, but you still pushed too hard. Hard enough for the Winter Soldier to come in from whatever the fuck he was previously occupied in and save your ass.

Did you atleast say thank you? No. You had barged off before he could even come over to your side.

As these thoughts trailed on, there was a knock at your door. You stood up groggily and went over to open it.

Bucky stood on the other side and you wondered if your sick brain had somehow conjured him up by fantasizing too much about punching his lights out.

"Hi?" he asked, making you slightly jump.

"Not a hallucination then." You remarked, sighing.

"Not last I checked," he smiled slightly. Smile? Was Bucky Barnes showing you pity?

"I brought you something," he continued, pulling his hand up to show a package. You didn't even need to ask him to know what it was. This was definitely pity with a capital P.

"What do you want?" you asked, sounding just as rude as you could be.

"Well, can't I come in? Things didn't go as planned back in 6th Avenue—"

"Look, if you came here to gloat, I'm not in the mood. I might magically make your mouth disappear."

"Threats already? I didn't even walk in the door." He smirked, holding up his hands in mock surrender. "Look, I’m not here to fight—" He glanced around your disheveled living room. "Though it seems like you've been doing a good enough job of that with yourself."

You scoffed. "Let me guess. You want me to get on my knees and say thank you?"

Utter bafflement crossed his features as well as a tint of red that wasn't there before. "I mean… it wasn’t your best moment," he said, his tone uncertain, "but that’s not why I’m here. Stark sent me."

Tony Stark doesn't excuse mistakes. Happy's voice rang through your ears. He's a big risk taker but if the risk doesn't pay off, you're toast.

Great, been an avenger for two months and I'm already sacked.

"Come on in," you mumbled, stepping aside. He made no remark about the mess, but sat in the couch as awkwardly as he could.

"What did he want?" you asked, dreading what was coming.

"Answers," he said with a shrug. "He wanted to know how you were stumped against the very type of demons that you specialize to know about. Asked me if you even know mythical creatures or were those just lies."

You gasped.

"That's not the end — he thought you might even be a double-agent."

Your gasp came shrill this time. "Double agent for who? Medusa? Does he think there's a secret lair of mythical unicorns planning to overtake New York?"

"If there is, he certainly thought you had the brains to be its head, so I would take it as a compliment."

You were openly glaring when you sat opposite him. "Well, I wouldn't. Greek gods have Olympus. I doubt they'd want the trash can that is New York."

He smirked. "That sounds like what I said."

"You stuck up for me?"

"I was surprised to be helpful too, don't worry."

"What 'help' did you do if he didn't believe it?"

"Who said he didn't?"

You opened your arms and waved around as if it was obvious. "You wouldn't be here if he did."

"Oh." Realization dawned on his face. "No, no, he did believe me. I came here on my own accord."

"No, you said you're here because of him."

"Well, I am. He sent his wishes too. Said flowers would reach you in two business days."

You blinked. "Flowers?"

"I told him you were sick."

"How the fuck did you know I was sick— I'm not—!" you paused to sneeze. He raised an eyebrow. "Alright it's obvious now, but how did you know in the fight? Don't tell me you're that observant over my health."

"I'm not. It felt like you were staring down the minotaur for no reason instead of using your powers. I figured you were fighting back a sneeze." He laughed. You turned red, easily embarrassed.

"Great, I'm a joke among you guys now." You stood up, sighing. "If that's all, I'll show you to the door. Leave the mask at the table."

"What mask?"

You frowned. "The mask I lost at the fight, which is clearly in that package right now."

"Y/N," he began slowly. "Have you lost your mind? This is chicken soup."

There was a pause.

Only then did it occur to you that he came in to check in on you. To see if you were okay. And he bought chicken soup. You blinked three times before replying.

"I — thank you," you resigned, not wanting to be surprised more. You sat back down.

"Do you have bowls?" he asked, looking at the unfinished plates of chips in front of the TV. "Preferably clean ones?"

"It's in the kitchen," you waved to your left door.

"I'll get them," he said, standing up before you could.

A wave of headache hit you before you could even assess if this "niceness" was all a plan to secretly kill you inside your house. But before you could ponder on it properly, you had fallen asleep.

You woke up an hour later to a clean room and the smell of chicken soup. Plus a very comfortable Bucky Barnes in the midst of it all.

You realized you could get used to having someone to help.

"Why're you smiling at me?" he asked, looking up from his bowl. You immediately rearranged your face to a scowl.

"You used the fancy china! Stop snooping through my cupboards, you creep!"

"I was just trying to help—"

"Well, THANK YOU!" you said, just as angrily as before.

Bucky shrugged, then went back to watching TV. He was used to your mood swings. You got up, hoping the flutter in your stomach was just a side effect of being ill.

THE END

commissions | KOFI

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #fluff #bucky barns fanfiction #bucky barnes #imagines #astoria writes #sebastian stan #enemies to lovers

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yourlocalsmutwriter · 4 days ago

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There are twice as many stars as usual - minotaur! Daniel Ricciardo x reader

cw: daniel actually cursing the second seat, body transformation verging on body horror, monster fucking, primal play (chasing reader through the woods), dubcon, dark! Danny, author read greek mythology in her formative years instead of talking to boys, so now we have this

It's September in Singapore, the night after the Grand Prix, and Daniel Ricciardo can't sleep. He lost his race seat. He heard the venomous words from Helmut on Friday. But he held on. He knew he could get the tractor out to Q3, he had the ability, the experience. Just not the pace. The old engine was holding him back, and that P18 was the final nail in the coffin of his career. He still tries, might as well go out in a blaze of glory. He manages the fastest lap, soft tires sparking up against the streets. Daniel brings her home to the garage and sits. He just waits. He's like a petulant child, hiding out in a bathroom, not wanting to face the world. Not wanting to let go of the comfort of the cockpit. Not wanting to face everyone like this. But it's hot, and he's not about to be a frog boiling itself alive. He still had a job to do. He gets out and gives his interview, misty eyed, and broken. His signature smile gone. The mention of Austin doesn't help.

Everyone knows why he stays in the paddock. Lando comes by, and Danny also swears the Netflix people are still lurking in the shadows for him. They should unionize, he thinks, along with the photographer that's waiting for a last shot. Daniel gives it to him. And goes back to his hotel.

Maybe it's the heat. Maybe it's the sheer nausea from the track. The shock of an icebath after it. Maybe it's months of unprocessed feelings and the week from hell recently in the media. But no matter how hard Daniel tries, he can not sleep. So he sets out with a plan. And thankfully the expensive hotel they are staying in has a receptionist 24/7. One that laughs at his face when he asks for the best place to find a witch.

"Sir, pardon me, but this isn't the White Lotus. I'm not some plot device that will magically bring you everything you need cause you're staying with us. I can help with a faulty AC, a light bulb that doesn't go out, sure. But I can not find you a tarrot reader at 3 in the morning." They say. Daniel sighs and opens his banking app. He hates using his status and money for things. He had a nice personality and good looks he'd rather utilise. He tilts the screen and asks

"How much?" Within an hour, a taxi stops in front of the hotel, and an old woman is knocking on Daniel's hotel room door.

"You must be pretty desperate to seek me out, young man. What is so pressing that you couldn't wait any longer?" She asks, clearly skeptical of him.

"I want to place a curse. And reinforce one I made years ago." He says, dead serious. Daniel explains the infamous second seat at Redbull curse he had actually asked for. How he had the terrible, winless seasons in Renault to repent for it. The worst luck from his stint in McLaren was due to the fact he was wishing evil on Pierre and Alex. It lessened when he had no seat or when he was a reserve. After all, as long as the "energy drink team" had him, there was no need to be despising them. Now Checo was collateral damage. Whatever podiums he'd had in 2023 would be his last. Daniel felt a bit conflicted about that, he and the Mexican driver did have a good time once. He breaks it down, as cohesively as possible. Describes exactly what he knows about the woman from Etsy he hired then. The witch listens intently to what he wants now. The second VCARB seat, too. Daniel Ricciardo could be a petty motherfucker when he wanted to. And Liam Lawson was going to feel that.

"Look, I am capable of it. But it comes with a price. I see your pain, your anger, your resentment. They are built up inside of you. That reserve is not endless. So when you no longer feel them, you will have to change. Shed your old skin and give in to what you want. If you do this, you might become nothing but a raging bull. Is it worth it?" She asks.

"Yes." He says without hesitation. The world of racing wouldn't be the same without him. But he knows that he also wouldn't be the same without racing. Not without a fight, right? Well, this was his fight.

Daniel lets the woman take a lock of his hair. He covers the smoke detector in the room with a trash bag so she can light her candles. Closes his eyes when instructed to. A magician never revealed secrets, huh?

It works, Daniel thinks, watching the rest of the season. Liam fights with Alonso of all people. As if Fernando was going to let a rookie make a fool out of him. The Alpine double podium in Brazil puts the French team up in the constructors and bumps the VCARB down. Meanwhile, Daniel is thriving. Enchanté is selling like hotcakes. He's still got the wines, the Thorne ads. He's dubbed a WAG of Josh and Scotty, he's traveling. He even attends some Redbull things. God ,does he like the bikes better. Maybe he should listen to those fans and stay in motorsport but on two wheelers. He had the ass for MotoGP, that's for sure. Of course, he has to lose something, too. That's how curses work.

The media is still vicious on him. The commentators, the articles, they help feed the datkness sometimes. But honestly, he is less petty than he was years ago. Repeated loss taught him to forgive. There was no use dwelling on the past. He was focused on the present, the future. Unfortunately, that's not how curses worked. It started with the announcement. Liam was moved to Redbull. Now, it was almost solely focused on him. He carried two curses. Which meant the universe had to take double from Daniel. Equivalent exchange and all of that. There was the reel fiasco. Who knew Enchanté would invite a comedian who was also a horrible person. The digital footprint of that wasn't great. Then, the underwhelming collection, where people criticized him for having higher prices and less inclusive sizing. But, as the season started, and he got to Australia, it had stopped. Maybe it was Daniel congratulating the New Zealander for the promotion. Maybe it was the combined bad luck of hometown heroes Doohan and Piastri. Maybe it simply had an expiration date he wasn't aware of? Either way, he had sold out his new drop. What was meant to be a homecoming in Australia for the new season.

Danny reflects on Saturday evening when he gets the message that it's all sold out. He won. Then Sunday, Isack's crash on the formation lap, Liam and Yuki's performance out of the points. It was taunting him. A hat trick of bad luck was coming his way. And he was none the wiser.

Daniel was getting hairier. He'd always been blessed with good genes, his dad's Italian heritage. The thick curls, the bushy eyebrows. But now it was a lot. His beard was out of control, and no amount of shaving cream could let a razor pass through it. He could only attempt to style it, the silver clippers burning slightly, but doing the job. His happy trail was more like a scarry dark road now, not to mention his bush. Danny had to put 4 pimple patches on his ingrown hairs, wincing as he pulled out the curly strands with tweezers. It was almost like he was growing fur, the hair was forming a peach fuzz on him everywhere. It got worse as the season went on. When Max started getting penalties out of nowhere, Danny sighed. But the sound that came out was inhuman, almost like a cow's moo, that terrifying throaty sound. It spooked Heidi so much that she got mad at him for pulling a prank on her. She kept telling him that she knew he played the sound on his phone, an app of some sort. But his trusty iPhone was charging upstairs, and he was as confused as her. Danny guessed it was just something going down the wrong pipe, an accident. But it kept happening, again and again. Sighs, snores, even words turned into that horrifying sound. The Grand Prix weekend ends. Daniel turns to speak to Heidi, but he can't. It's all a demented moo. He pleads for her to listen, to help. She calls an ambulance and tells the paramedics something about a "psychotic break." or an episode of some disorder. They shove the world's thickest needle in Danny's ass. He's out like a light, and when he comes to, it's Monday night. They keep him for tests, just a few days. There's apparently nothing wrong with him. He comes back home, and there's left of Heidi is a note saying she's sorry. That's strike one.

He packs up his stuff too. There's no use. He had moved out of Monaco. He could move out of this one too. Go back to his childhood home, spend some time with his parents. He could run things from there too, couldn't he? Visit some local someliers, work on what's next. Plus the extra money from selling this place would be good. Of course he manages to wrap it up in 4 days, get an initial meeting with his realtor on Monday. Daniel knows he shouldn't tune into the GP. Suzuka is a good track, though. He rations that if the race is boring, he'll just doze off, the sound of the engines putting him to sleep. Right? He watches the whole thing, ears perked up. Yuki, in his home race, first in the Redbull team, isn't doing too hot. And Daniel feels bad for him. Maybe it's camaraderie, for the almost 2 years they had in formerly Alpha Tauri. Maybe it's guilt, because all of the bad luck was only meant for Liam. Not for everyone. But there is no malice in Daniel anymore. He can't really sleep that night, there's a splitting headache that's troubling him. He googles it all - stroke, brain tumors, aneurysms, the lot. But nothing feels like the constant pain he's having at the sides of his skill. It's almost like when he had his wisdom teeth coming in sideways. There was something trying to grow, to pierce through when it couldn't and it was driving him insane. He took advill and paracetamol or ibuprofen, something to ease it. He was skirting on the amount, almost on the verge of actually taking too much when he managed to fall asleep.

Daniel was late. Badly, horrendously late. At the last minute he stormed in the realtor's office, still in the tanktop he had slept in. Curls messy, face red from the pillow, head still throbbing. He didn't stop when the receptionist screamed (she was new, he noted, must be a fan). He sat down and saw the realtor's face turn fifty shades of red. Daniel was dragged out with a "Why you?" and a "Am I some sort of twisted joke to you." and something about hornbearing. The former athlete looks in the mirror in his car and almost thinks he's still dreaming. There are two big straight bull horns coming out of his head. Actual horns, made out of god knows what. Danny googles hornbearer and in some languages it's slang for being cheated on. He remembers his realtors messy divorce. The wife running away with the best friend, the whole affair lasting for years. The fact that Danny shares a first name with his realtor. Daniel is a hornbearer, Ricciardo wants to remind him of that. The complexity of that sentence worsens his headache. He goes to buy a ridiculous fedora. By the time he's home and trying to call someone else, the rumor that he's a horrible client spreads like a wildfire. The house doesn't sell. But right before the next free practice on Friday, the horns are gone. Which is good, because Danny can't really justify them to passport control. That's strike two.

Australian soil seems to do him well. For now. Maybe it's because he doesn't watch the race. Maybe it's the huge time difference. Maybe it's just a bit of luck. But for a few days, nothing bad happened to Daniel Ricciardo.

It's actually just a fluke. Just like the mini break between China and Suzuka, that seemed shorter to everyone. But the third strike and the bad luck from Bahrain 2025 was going to catch up to Danny. No matter how fast he ran from it.

Farm life was his thing. Before, he couldn't even get that close to the animals. They didn't know him. Didn't trust him. He was a stranger. Now he was shearing sheep and alpacas like a pro. Always knowing when the cows need to be milked. He even knew more about them than the farmlands. Daniel could tell which animal was sick. Which cow was fertile. It started to freak him out. It wasn't like he was using a farmer's almanac or something. It just came naturally. Like driving. No, like breathing. Then came the next race. Saudi Arabia. He didn't have the fondest memories of Jeddah. Didn't feel like tuning in. But his dad was somehow now invested in Doohan's performance. Something about a fellow Aussie in the sport. Daniel knew that Joseph saw younger Danny in Jack and Oscar. That hungry, scrappy 20 something battling for points, for a win. Alone, in Europe, missing home, trying to get sponsors, trying to get the people back at home to tune in. So he sits by his dad, and despite all odds, Daniel cheers for the McLarens. He should really pick a team he had no history with, like Ferrari or Aston Martin. Seeing the VCARBs scramble for points is like a punch to the gut. He can't help but wonder what he'd do in the car. Would the upgrades be kind to him? Would he be able to outperform Isack or Liam or Yuki. Could he be even close to them on the SIM, or would he be at a Sauber's pace or in the wall. Danny looks at his hand, the scar still visible. Oscar is on the podium again, being drowned in champagne like his predecessor once was. And Mark Webber before them. And Jack Brabham. Who would come after them? Where was the rookie that would take it home one day? Daniel thinks of all the kids he could visit on the karting tracks. How he's getting old now and should be thinking of making one anytime now. After all, somebody has to give baby Verstappen- Piquet a run for their money.

Dan goes to sleep in his childhood bedroom and wakes up in a barn. He can't see properly. His eyes seem so far apart, and his head feels heavy. He takes a breath and hears a loud "pff" coming out of his nostrils. That can't be right. He tries to get up, but his hair keeps getting in his eyes. The dark curls are entirely too long, almost like bangs now. He looks around, and he can't recognize any of the animals. He sees the brands, the tags, and it clicks. He's in the next property over. The one which got inherited by some distant relatives of the original owners who wanted nothing to do with it. Who turned it into an AirBnB, giving the guest an "authentic experience." And discounted prices due to the animal stench. Daniel recalls listening on the farm hands talking about the trio of friends and how they messed up, thinking they'd be able to travel to Sydney and back every day. How one of them apparently wore his team hat like a uniform, not having any idea, he lived nearby. This was bad. He had to get out of there. He couldn't afford for a fan to see him dazed and confused, post sleep walking and apparently, judging by his bare feet scrambling on the hay, naked. He tried to walk, but he collided head first with a pole. Daniel lets out a groan, and here it is that moo, from months ago. The sound that drove away Heidi was now back. And it was scarring the cattle. He was walking over to them, trying to soothe them, but to no avail. It was only getting worse.

He hears footsteps and tries to hide. But the sudden movement makes him dizzy, and before he realizes what's going on, he's on his ass. All he can do is try to hide his head between his legs, literally. But as soon as he realizes that two protruding horns are on his knees, he knows he's inevitably and irrevocably screwed.

You hate this entire trip. Your Australian friend finally goes back home, and by some miracle, you can send her off before going long distance. Then, at the airport, she gets the text that her friends are no longer welcome in her parents' home. Something about traditions and bad luck. Slight bump on the road, but that just means that you'll have to find a cheap hotel nearby. The only thing in your budget that can accommodate 3 people is hours away. With no other option, you're on a farm in Perth. And now, in the middle of the night, the animals are freaking out. The rest of your friends think that the livestock will calm down on its own. But you see it as an omen. What if there's a snake or a spider that's in the barn? Or an intruder, a drunk teenager, or something. So you go to check it out, classic horror movie trope. Lone girl in the dead of the night, only in her babydoll nightgown. Serial killers were also a possibility you reason with yourself as you use your phone flashlight. George Orwell did not prepare you for this might be one of the last things you think. At least it was iconic.

You walk in and the cacophony starts again. Of course the animals aren't happy, they don't know you. But there's something wrong. There's a statue in the middle of the barn? A perfect replica of a minotaur that wasn't there before. You go to touch it and it moves. You jerk away immediately as if you're scalded by burning water.

"Jesus, what are you? A freaky robot?" You ask and it shakes its head.

"Wait, was that a coincidence? Can you actually understand me?" The creature shakes its head again and then nods. So there was a human in there. An anatomically correct one, judging by the quick glance you make towards it, well him now. You should go. Get back to bed and blame this on whatever moonshine you drank with your friends after finding a bottle in a closet. Call it a sleep paralysis demon or something. But you can't just leave it. Because he looks as confused as you are. His dark brown bull eyes remind you of someone. You ask him if he's seen himself and he shakes his head no. You ask him if it's okay to take a picture with the flash on and show him. He nods. You almost laugh as he poses, a rock on sign next to his horns. You snap the shot and walk over to him. You try to move in such a way he sees himself, but when you're close enough, you get your eureka moment. He has tattoos, ink on his skin that's as familiar as if it was on yours. The American traditional ship on his thigh. The rose on his hand. The of love and life on his collarbone. This creature was your celebrity crush. Daniel Ricciardo was in quite of a pickle. And you'd be in one too if you let on that you knew it was him.

Because Daniel was off the grid, in more than one way. Even the Instagram and Tumblr fan pages were in a drought. Scotty's content was only throwbacks, the man was practically a ghost. Technically a minotaur, you joke in your head. You absent-mindedly hand him the phone, let him see what he looks like. You don't notice the sounds of distress. How both of his hands fly to his crotch, cupping it awkwardly. How he's shaking his head, almost wanting to throw away the bull face with sheer force. You're terrified, but you do something stupid. You start comforting him, as if he's a child. Whispering that it's okay and that he's safe. That this can be fixed. You should leave. You should give him some clothes and snacks, let him sleep in or something. But you can't help it. You touch his head, attempting to brush off the fur out of his eyes. A male highland cow, you thought, fit him better than a honeybadger. He huffs, his dark brown eyes filled with rage.

"I'm sorry, Daniel." You say, entirely to loud. He knows you know. So you do the one thing you know you shouldn't do. You turn your back on him and run.

He's an athlete. Albeit retired, he has his stamina. He can run. And you barely see in the dark. You don't know the layout, just that it looks huge. You somehow have a head start, the bunny slippers having good grip on the grass. But you can hear him behind you. Huffing, mad, a raging bull. You speed out of there, happy that your friends left the door to the wooden fence open. You're in the thick of it now. There's just a dirt road ahead of you and you take it. Twigs snap around you, you scrape your legs on bushes. You feel like Daniel is enjoying this, enjoying how you already sound out of breath. How you occasionally look back to see him dangerously close to you. How a snake darts out and you shriek, backing into him. How he takes the creature and lets it curl around him, seemingly needing the heat. Danny releases it, letting it go in the opposite direction of you. You, who's kneeling, exhausted, trying to catch your breath. Mud is caking the hem of your nightgown and you're just defeated.

Daniel should pick you up and lead you back to safety. He should trust that you won't tell anyone about this. Who would believe you anyway. If you sold the pictures, they'd think you got a little crazy with photoshop. Or that he was into some weird furry sex thing. But there's something about you, looking so vulnerable, caught by him, helpless that makes him feral. So he has to get it out of his system, the anger he just felt posses him earlier.

He kneels, tan legs familiar with the soil. He'd sit here often after a bike ride, knee pads off, just stretching or squatting. And now he was on top of you, elbows on either side of your face, cock heavy, almost brushing against your ass. He can see that you're frozen, eyes wide in fear. Your breathing is irregular and he's scared. He knows what a panic attack feels like, knows how your chest is tight already. So he does what a bull might do to a calf that's in distress. Licks.

The thick bovine tongue smells bad. The texture is almost slimy, but it also feels good? It encompasses your whole chest. He presses it against your left breast, and swirls it. He's trying to feel your heartbeat, you guess but the only thing he's successfully doing is flicking his tongue against your nipple. Again. And again. And again. You scratch at the ground bellow you, caking your nails with dirt.

"Daniel please." You say and he gets the jist. You've calmed down. He pulls away, a thick string of saliva connecting you. You're not sure what you're doing and why. Maybe it's all the adrenaline, scrambling your brain. But you get on your hands and knees and spread your legs for him. You move your panties to the side, exposing your cunt to him. It's an invitation. A peace offering, if you will. He pressed his wet nose against it and attempts a kiss. When it doesn't work, he simply licks a stripe from your clit to your entrance.

It's soaked and sloppy and clumsy, and yet it has you aching for more. You reach your hand behind you, spread your folds open, showing him exactly what you need. His tongue is as thick as regular cock, even worse. It fills you, stretching you out so good. The texture which you thought you'd hate was actually good, foreign yet intriguing. You shift your hips, trying to move, to get more, to fuck yourself on it, on him. Daniel doesn't like your squirming. It's throwing him off, what if you move the wrong way and accidentally scratch yourself on his new horns. So he grabs you around the waist and picks you up, your knees around his shoulders. He thrusts his tongue into your slick cunt as you're upside down, just moaning and catching an eyefull of his monstrous cock.

You're sure your perspective might be off because that thing did not fit with Daniel's human lower half. It was big, bigger than anything you've ever seen (aside on your curious browses of the Bad Dragons site) and definitely way more than anything you've ever taken. The minotaur above you didn't let you be distracted for long, flicking his tongue. He fully grabbed your hips and pulled you towards him, fucking you with his tongue. He's fast and unrelenting and before you know it, you're coming against his face. Danny sets you down gently, but you're still face to face with his cock. Angry, red, the tip decorated with beads of precum on it. Begging to be used, begging to shoot loads into your pussy, to fill you and breed you. Well, when in magical realism, you think. You silently ask that Australia has good gynecologists on speed dial and affordable healthcare before saying.

"Danny, will you sit for me. I think that will be the easiest way for me to try to take this. Rely on good old gravity." He lets out a puff of air from his nostrils, what you take as a chuckle. But he obeys. He holds your hips, giving your thighs a gentle squeeze. Daniel nudges the monster cock around you, trying to gather the slick from his saliva and your orgasm. He can't even get the tip in. You take a deep breath and relax, and just try to move down. It's slow, but it feels good. So, so good. Danny wants to hump you, to shove his dick inside of you, but he knows he can't. He settles for groping you instead, rough, calloused suntan hands against your tits. Squeezing, making you moan. You're so responsive to him, gone is the fear and hesitation. You're running on lust fumes, fucking made for taking his cock. You try to move, to bounce on it, to get something. But you're lucky because your partner is sensitive. Hasn't felt even his own fist around his cock, much less a perfect wet cunt. It doesn't take much for you to be feeling the telltale slowing of his hips, the throb of him inside of you.

Daniel Ricciardo kisses you as he cums. It's sloppy and gross, and you can taste yourself a tenfold of his large tongue. But it's also right. You get off him, legs jelly. You're too tired to move, and you just hope that you're actually able to flee with him. God knows what a farmhand will think if they find the two of you like that. For now you curl against Danny and try to get some sleep.

Daniel still wakes up before you, feeling lighter, like the worst is over. He turns to you and there aren't horns digging into the dirt below him. He looks around and luckily enough, he did manage to drag you far enough for no one to see. You were sleeping peacefully, his fucking cum dried in a puddle beneath you. Your clothes are intact enough, albeit filthy. He nudges you, getting ready for the most unusual morning after conversation. But when you open your eyes and practically cover his face with kisses, he changes his mind. Maybe it would be worth keeping you. Especially after you promise to get him a clean pair of clothes to change into if he points you to the way back.

Of course, his smug laughter echoes when you realize he's fully naked and mutter "that wasn't part of the weird minotaur thing, god does have favorites." He also finds it amusing that your most oversized clothes are the Hugo shirts he "modeled for", you were a bit of a crazy fangirl, huh. He liked to be liked, to be praised, to be worshiped. He dedicated his life to this sport, so why wouldn't he profit from it. Danny likes that you find a loophole in your visa and stay with him in his parents' house. You're constantly encouraging him, making him appreciate life again. Helping him draft his little LinkedIn posts. Just listening to his ideas and showing him the little Tiktoks fans make to support the Enchanté and F1 academy collaboration. Both of you cheer and drink a shit ton of the new wine when Christian Horner gets demoted. Maybe that's why in the morning you're vomiting, head almost in the toilet. The cheeseburger Danny offers as hungover food also doesn't bode well for you. There's something wrong, and you think it's stress. International moves lead to missed periods, right? Somewhere, in Singapore, an old woman is looking into a crystal ball. It's May in Australia, and Daniel Ricciardo can't sleep again.

#f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1 imagine #f1 smut #dark f1 #daniel ricciardo x you #daniel ricciardo smut #daniel ricciardo drabble #daniel ricciardo imagine #monster fucker #terato #minotaur boyfriend #dark daniel ricciardo

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vilebird · 11 months ago

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FUNERAL AFTER A NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE

a painting of a pale sky and bright blue sea crashing onto dark rocks and foaming. it's oriented the right way. - Day, by Frederick Judd Waugh

"and the man looks me in the eyes and he points to the blue-orange vault over heaven's gates and he says the face of everyone you miss is up there and i know i know i can't see them but i know" - And What Good Will Your Vanity Be When The Rapture Comes, by Hanif Willis-Abdurraqib

"i've cut myself off. i can feel the place / where i used to be attached. it's raw, as when you grate / your finger. it's a shredded mess / of images. it hurts." The Door, by Margaret Atwood

"i found you / i found the door / but when i stepped through / there was no floor" I want you, by Mitski

a still from a video of a bright setting sun against a dark orange sky and dark blue sea, with the caption "don't cry" - The Green Ray (1986)

"i feel dead. / i feel as if i were the residue of a stranger's life" - The Lost Pilot, by James Tate

"the shuddering moan of blood, a song to calm the sacrificial, the loss across the river. the way a dying animal will look at you is seared into me. we tie together and all over again." - i cant remember what this one is sorru

"i am feeling numb. it's a curious feeling, and i get it all the time. my attention to the world around me disappears, and something starts to hum inside my head. far off, voices try to bump up against me, but i repel them. my ears fill up with water and i focus on the humming inside my head. / i am inside my skull. it is a little cave, and i curl up inside it. below it, my body hovers, unattached." - Madness: A Bipolar Life, by Marya Hornbacher.

"-though we're dry and waiting. part of me died here so another could go on. the body i raised-" - When They Say you Can't Go Home Again What They Mean is You Where Never There, by Marty McConnell

text: "there'll always be a few things / maybe several things/ that you're gonna find / really difficult to forgive" image: a black silhouette of a minotaur sitting on top of a pale pillar rising out of a pale maze, looking out at an orange sunset over an empty desert beyond the walls of its maze. the text is black letters on white pasted in strips over top. - Up the Wolves by the Mountain Goats and Minotauro by Jordi Garriga Mora. collage put together by @scatterghosts

"i know there are things i haven't survived." - Lord of the Butterflies, by Andrea Gibson

"it seems to me that the dead only return for love or for revenge. who did you come back for?" - White is for Witching, by Helen Oyeyemi

a painting of a bright white bird on a background split between dark blue and black - Promised Land (2013), by Michael Creese

"and with or without your support, i will continue / what im trying to say is you never know what you've been through / til you pause and cough it out" - Cough It Out by The Frontbottoms

"painting all the mirrors black / i won't see you staring back / i'm getting lost forever / searching in the broken glass / trying to ignore the past / and put myself together" - Mirrors by 8 Graves

"saint calvin told me not to worry about you / but he's got his own things to deal with / there's really just one thing we have in common: / neither of us will be missed" - Saint Bernard by Lincoln

"so many bright lights to cast a shadow / but can i speak? / well, is it hard understanding / that i'm incomplete?" - Famous Last Words by My Chemical Romance

"being in a completely normal nonthreatening scenario & environment and thinking 'i have GOT to get the fuck out of here' with the intensity of some trapped neurotic prey animal" - tumblr post by user @greelin

"but you know me / what can't i conjure into hysteria / and longing? / any place is a funeral as soon as i get there. / of course i'm the disaster / but you're the one foolish enough / to learn my name." - The Next Time We Talk on Facebook, by Clementine von Radics

"if your wounds are still open, trust / they are the doors to an answer, / and walk through." - You Better Be Lightning, by Andrea Gibson

text: "what a tremendous thing to learn from" image: black text on white strips across a blue-orange gradient - i forgot this one too sory

"when the body remembers, it bucks wildly / when we try to heal, the phantom smell returns / while in the shower, you break down / while you wash your body you realise it is not your body / and at the same time, it is the only body you have" - Bless the Daughter Raised by a Voice in Her Head, by Warsan Shire

"that was the thing. you never got used to it, the idea of somebody being gone. just when you think it's reconciled, accepted, someone points it out to you, and it just hits you all over again, that shocking." - The Truth About Forever, by Sarah Dessen

"the spirit is so hurt / it don't know the / body / it / looks in / the mirror / and asks, who is it?" - On/My/Aging, by Carolyn Marie Rodgers

"could we sit together in new bodies, shoulder to tender / shoulder, / the lovely and the thorned, the bitter and the failed, / the grave to the left of us, the sea to the right?" - 8, Always a Rose, by Li-Young Lee

"the fact of the matter is / you survived, / it's what you do. / death and you / walk side by side / all sigh and scythe / you stay alive. / and you have the right / but struggle to believe. / you're still allowed / to be alive. / it feels inappropriate." - It's What You Do, by Lena Oleanderson @lena-oleanderson

a painting of a bright orange sky at sunset, sun nowhere to be seen, over a pale sea crashing onto dark rocks and foaming. it's oriented upside down. - Night, by by Frederick Judd Waugh

#webweaving #webweave #web weaving #poems #spilled ink #collage #litstack #axed title: i cant tell if surviving was the better option #wtf else did i tag this shit

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changingnames-constantly · 7 days ago

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So i'm listening to Epic the Musical again and so I'm labeling Starbound characters as gods/people from Greek mythology :)

Asri: Hesphestus but also like- Apollo? He's like a mix of both because he's strong and does the labor like Hesphestus but his personality is very Apollo-like

Evren: Dionysus, I personally think this is self-explanatory but if not-WINE DIVA

Tad: He gives Hermes to me-, I haven't watched much of the vods but from what I do know he seems like Hermes

Aura: Athena, specifically more EPIC Athena as it is not surrounding just her strategical smarts but her emotional smarts. Also her expectations, I know Athena is a little contradictory but Aura gives Athena to me. Although also in a weird way reminds me of Theseus? Or even Circe in the way that she had to earn respect. Also Daedalus.

Vesper: The deceiving side of Circe and also Vesper kind of being like how Circe turned Scylla into a sea witch- that's kinda what happened to Vesper when she decided to bully Aura-. Hermes in a trickster/thief way, also travels as Evren can fly and she can't, a contradiction as Hermes had to travel a lot through the world and the underworld and Evren being able to fly but Vesper not being able to.

Vic: Artemis because fox, a little Hermes to

Romeo: Hera. Specifically EPIC Hera. She gives me that vibe.

Mi-Go: Aphrodite BECAUSE of the whole Hephestus and Ares thing. I like for Mi-Go it would be a metaphor for wanting to find that soulmate but having to put up with another one/ones first to find that.

Epsilon: Hades or Nyx vibes. Is kinda there, you know it's there but struggle to where or what it's thinking.

Navi: Penelope as in waiting to wake up, only being able to talk to one person, etc, not the Odysseus part, more of it's loyalty.

Ronja: I don't know like- anything about her but her vibe gives me Helios for some reason.

Daiv: Aesculapius cause a healer and medicine, I feel like he's a mix with Apollo maybe.

Skye: Ares but with a mix of Helios and/or Hermes, I take fighter pilot seriously lol. Helios cause the chariot and Hermes cause travel but I think Helios makes more sense.

Laika: Prometheus with a mix of Achilles, don't ask me why- I just get that vibe.

Aeros: Seems Hermes like to me, I don't know much about Aeros but from what I do know, Hermes.

Starco: Minotaur. HEAR ME OUT specifically the Minotaur in Circe by Madeline Miller. Again, I don't know why, but it makes sense okay-

...I think that's everyone...

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hedonistbyheart · 2 months ago

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I finished the hymn to Dionysus. (Beware spoilers)

It's been a while since a book settled into me and added to my mental tapestry. The Watchmaker series did that, but her other books didn't really. This one did.

I stand by my take about the pacing; Phaidros' relationship to Helios is summarised a bit too much for how much space it takes up in his heart and the narration in general. I'm guessing Pulley didn't want to have Phaidros' two love interests fight in the reader's mind by focusing too much on showing what he and Helios built as adults, but it does make Phaidros' devotion ring a little hollow, because we don't get to experience it close up for very long.

I love everything else. Pulley is always great at characters, but with Phaidros I think she managed what I don't think she did with Missouri Kite; a character who is unmistakably ruthless and quite broken, but also loyal and gentle sometimes. She went too far for me, with Kite, but Phaidros strikes a balance that keeps me from despising him.

I love Dionysus the most. He is very much like Wuxi from Lord Seventh: a strange witch in black, veiled and dangerous, who has pet snakes and jaguars and controls nature, but he's also very much his own thing. It's just easy to see why he would be my favourite. He echos Mori a lot too, in mannerisms and type and I can't help but wonder if there are tiny pulleyverse threads there?

I love the blind agender/non binary prophet as well and I think they're in the actual myths somewhere.

That's another thing that works incredibly well in this book: it keeps recalling the Greek myths, both directly as recent history or a spoken reference, like persephone or Troy, but also as woven into what's happening in the story: the minotaur isn't spoken of directly, but it is referenced in the events.

Plato's allegory of the cave is something Phaidros constantly uses as a mental framework, but he exists before Plato so it's not referenced like that. I could tie it to linguistic relativity if I wanted and since I wrote about that in my literal master's thesis, you can imagine how I'm fucking buzzing, lol.

Other than that it's a beautiful love story, it has those inscrutable immortals I so love to read about and it is full of so so much beautiful prose, but you'll always get that with Natasha Pulley.

#the hymn to dionysus #pulleyverse #thtd spoilers #literary chatter #Natasha Pulley

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twsted-kinks · 1 year ago

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Djsjdjjd the monster fuckers are hungry 👀 👀 👀Love to see so many people like the ideas and git some if there own! Gonna number each of these and give me thoughts for each one.

I can't believe I didn't think about Rollo but yes definitely a human trying to "save" Yuu from monsters. Your ask got me thinking and now my priest kink came to mind cause just imagine Rollo is the priest for a church in a small village with Yuu being maybe like the black sheep of the village. Rollo wants to "save" because Yuu 1) is a witch (with Grim as their familiar) or potion maker 2) they often go to the neighboring village filled with monsters 3) if Rollo saves them then Yuu would be indebted and would have to marry him 👀. I'm just imaging him is a cassock and it's making me feel things. I could do the classic seducing a priest during confessional fic but there's a lot of depends. I really love the idea of Yuu taking Rollo's virginity but an idea I love more is Yuu and Malleus both fucking Rollo like a Rollo sandwich of him fucking Yuu and Malleus fuckijg both Yuu and Rollo because double decker dick.

I love slimes for all the sexual shenanigans you can do with them that I think work well for Cater. As a slime, he can make copies of himself like his unique magic so multiple Cater's to fuck. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. Cater, as a slime, can squeeze into a lot of places fully or leave small parts of himself behind. For the voyeur side, he can leave a little bit of his slime in your home that watches you undress, bathe, pleasure yourself, or pleasure others even. He could also make himself a pseudo ovipositior and leave little eggs, which are just a part of him, inside you. He has complete control of the little slimes so his "eggs" can move around while inside you. You could also be inside of him. Like his body can almost act like a blanket or restraint that was around you as he fills your holes. He can also kinda shape-shift and have whatever and any number of parts he wants. What I'm debating about Cater is if he's translucent or not or both. I'm probably gonna go with him being a translucent pink color naturally but can change colors and opacity so he can turn into other people at least look wise.

I love Riddle centaur! Show horse having to be all proper and formal but he turns to mush around Yuu. One if my favorite centaur tropes I think works very well for Riddle, has a boner but can't reach. Whenever he gets horny he can't do anything about it! He's never been able to touch himself :( I don't have an order of who Yuu will fuck but I do know for Riddle that his first time with Yuu is gonna be because they take pity of the poor centaur, cock dripping and balls heavy with no release.

Bunny Deuce I think is so cute and works so well for him, and, yes, he fucks like a rabbit. He totally hooks his arms around your torso and apologizes as he ruts into you. He's sorry he can't stop you just feel too good! Or maybe he's ridding you reverse cowgirl and you see his little tail wiggling as he cums 🤤. The thing I'm not sure about with Deuce or with a number of the monster au guys is if I want to go the hybrid route (basically human with animal ears and limbs) or or full fantasy furry kinda deal (kinda like a classic minotaur but different animal heads and other traits)

#twst smut #twst x reader #answers #twst thots #twst #twst monsterfucking #twst monster au

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busybeewriting · 9 months ago

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Piggybacking off your last ask: thoughts on a monster AU for the cast? :0 It's canon it's a magic universe and there's witches/dragons at the very least, I wonder if werewolves or mermaids exist as well!

Oh my gosh yes! I love this!! I love supernatural or like monster AUs!! I had my friend help me imagine some too- so Hayden, Balor, Reina and Valen all have her ideas as well :3

Adeline: I think given her status- she'd be a dragon hybrid. Maybe not fully dragon but she definitely would have the scales and maybe horns and a tail.

Eiland: Piggybacking off of Adeline. This man is a dragon. Through and through. Not one single character screams thier monster more than Eiland screams Dragon. Balor: Vampire. Enough said. If you've ever played Balder's Gate 3? Astarion types of Vampire. Or, a trickster fae who likes to make deals with people. Celine: I love her so much and I can not decide if she would be like a fairy, or a mermaid. Im leaning toward fairy more than mermaid for the soul fact that she would be like Thumbelina and also she could sleep in flowers. Hayden: Mans is the Minotaur. Look at him, then look at the Minotaur and tell me I'm wrong. You can't. Ryis: This man is a dryad. Made of wood and likes to attract creatures. He would be so happy to be a tree and have birds sit on him and be so happy. Reina: I can not decide what she would be. I think in this fantasy world she's the bar maid who sends people one quests and takes no shit. She could be anything and also nothing. March: He is a werewolf. He would be the same way in his human form as he usually is- but his wolf form? They would love you so much, like good luck getting up from his big paws. You have to cuddle with him during the full moon and he is so happy about it. Valen: Vampire. I mean- c'mon. Doctor? Blood? She'd be all about it.

A/N: This lowkey made me wanna write a werewolf!March x reader but I hope you enjoyed! And as always-

Requests are open!!

#fieldsofwriting #fields of mistria x reader #fields of mistria #fom march #juniper fom #hayden fom #fom x reader #fom #fom reina #fom valen #fom eiland #fom adeline #fom celine #fom balor #fom ryis #ryis fom #march x farmer #fom march x reader

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grigori77 · 2 days ago

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TOTAL PARTY KILL (the Chicago Live One Shot)

Okay, here we go ... who's in this then?

BEAUREGARD LIONETT!!! Yeah! Nice one ... and yeah, Marisha had ALL THE ENERGY right now ...

Well I mean OF COURSE it's gonna be Grog Dtrongjaw. That's like a no-brainer, isn't it?

Kingsley Tealeaf? Oh, well this should be interesting then ...

Once again, OF COURSE it's Caleb!

And yeah, I'm much happier with Veth, she's too good not to be in this one ...

Fearne? Oh, that's ALSO interesting ... but also cool ...

Please Jester, please ... YAY!!! Yup, that makes me most happy, she's my favourite ...

Sam ... oh, poor Sam, once again not understanding the assignment at all ... XD

Oh boy ... here we go, what fresh hell this time with Riegel? Wow ... yeah, he really is so bad at accents ... oh no ... please, not audience participation ... oh gods help us ... Ben Franklin's famous quote? What are you fishing for, Samuel?

Travis (chuckling): "Oh wow!" Matt: "That's a new nightmare."

Thank you for that affirmation, Marisha! Thankfully I didn't run into any major spoilers I wasn't ready for, so ...

Oh, interesting ... no title sequence? Okay, then ...

Only months? Hmmmm ... and yes, what IS going on in Exandria now? How big a mess have you made for yourself, Matt Mercer?

The Council? Gilmour! Allura! Kima! And Cassandra! Nice ... meanwhile even though we've got FIXED CHARACTERS here we're STILL getting the rest of VM as well ... yeah ... should have seen THAT coming ...

And Scanlan's STILL a centaur ... but then isn't Pike one too now?

Oh wow, yeah ... that's tight, Vax IS here ... and he's right, nothing has changed ...

Ah, Grog ... yeah ... boy hasn't changed at all ...

Oh great, what's THIS shit? Ah, I see what you did there ... yeah, this is it, then. This is how it starts ...

Zemnia? Hmmm ...

The Cult of the Cloaked Serpent? Huh?

Yay! The Nein! Okay, this should be the proper kickoff ...

A distant slithering sound ... lovely ... what the fuck is THIS shit? Oh, that can't be good ... Beau: "Oh cool, it talks. They made snakes worse!"

Is this it already? Initiative time? Oh no ... here it comes, then ... this is it ...

Yup, it's happening ... wait, how's this going to go for whoever's left behind?

Issylra? Nice ...Bells Hells now ... how's THIS gonna go?

A|h yes ... Orym's constant ridiculous high Perception ...

Asivine glyph? LOvely ... MAKE SAVING THROWS!!! Marisha: "Witches be ditzes!" The sexy minotaur? Oof ... oh crap, a Judicator?

Yup, here we go ... it's all kicking off ... and now they're all leaving the stage? Hmmmmm ...

Wait ... is Matt making US complicit in this madness? THis is deeply weird ... O.O

Okay ... um ... where's Mercer going? Huh?

Oh, hello Robbie ... oh, this is ... yeah, I actually quite like this ... Malvolio Contreras? Hmmmm ... and Merty? Okay ...

Yeah, this has all gone a bit surreal, but I like where they;re going with it ... it's all going a bit X-Men ...

Robbie: "I know there's nothing a fandom love more than sudden change!" Yeah ... O.o

The first victim, then? Beau? Oh, this should be interesting ... is she just going to beat the fuck out of them both?

Beau: "Ugh! It's got branding! Gross!"

Grog? An "unstoppable intellect"?

Oh yeah, OF COURSE he's into this ...

Beau: "What did you do?" Grog: "I took a shit!"

Kingsly: "You must be the ruler of the Tacky Dimension!"

Caleb starts trying to count the crowd ... wow, our boy is DEFINITELY a bit confused wright now ...

Oh yeah, the classic Veth scream! I love that ... "Oh wait, Fjord isn't here! Yes!"

Yeah, I expected this, OF COURSE Fearne's just TOTALLY okay with this ... but not so much to outfit. Yeah ...

And suddenly she's glued to her chair!" Fearne: "Oh ... FUCK!"

Classic overly excitable Jester ... and of course she IMMEDIATELY thinks this is the Traveller ... oh yeah, that's right, ply her with pastries!

Veth: "Jester, he's holding us hostage!" Beau: "Jester, don't indulge them!"

Caleb: "Ah, so they are all our ENEMIES." Veth: "Wait, we have to fight all of THEM?" Yeah, that's probably not gonna work out too well ...

The first game? Oh gods, it's starting already ...

Wait, they're competing AGAINST each other? THat's not good!

Merty: "We never promised balance! We just promised ENTERTAINMENT!!!"

Rolling for a representative? Hmmmmm ...

And now Caleb's a giant orange ape ... okay then ...

Malvolio: "Toadies, bring out the props!" Oh dear ...

Oh boy ... what is Liam doing right now? You mad monkey boy ... O.O Oof ... this doesn't look good ...

Gods ... this is already turning into Taskmaster ...

They're sitting on baloons? Great ... yeah, this really isn't dignified, mate ...

What the fuck am I even watching right now?

Malvolio: "Sixty seconds was longer than we thought it was! Can you believe we've never rehearsed this?"

THat sleight of hand roll ... nice one, Veth!

Fearne: "I love punishment!" Yeah, I'm not sure you're gonna enjoy THIS, luv ... oh crap, it's HELLFIRE? Not good ...

They have some of their magic back? Hmmmm ... oh boy, this is all getting ugly already ...

"The Traveller's Blessing"? Oh boy ... yeah, I figured this would get her attention. Jester: "I want to do it! I volunteer as tribute!"

It's a ring toss? Wow ... the surreality continues ...

Boulder Parchment Shears!

Grog's Nat20 gets a standing ovation ... OF COURSE it does ...

Haste? Caleb's getting underhanded .., meanwhile Veth gives Beau some booze ...

I love how Fearne and Jester are STILL just being chummy ... :3

For the most ahtletic members of the crew these two are doing REALLY BAD right now and I'm loving it ... XD

Blood Curse of the Eyeless? KIngsley! O.O

I was right, this IS basically Taskmaster!

Step of the Wind? Sounds like it's worth it, Beau ... O.O Gah! Nuts ...

Guiding Bolt? Bloody hell, Jester!

Seven to the Blue team ... five for the Reds? Ouch ...

Great ... what's in store for them then? Jester tries to work out of it by trying to make MC her Maid of Honour ... I'm not that sure how this is gonna go ... YEAH, that's about right ... a Black Void of Spite? Bloody hell ... O.O

THIRTY-EIGHT POINTS of Necrotic damage? Oof ...

Intelligence? Oh dear ... not sure how THIS is gonna go either ... who are we choosing? Grog is NOT a good choice ... wait, SEVENTEEN from Grog? HOw the actual FUCK? O.O

Wait ... are Kingsley and Fearne flirting right now?

Trivia ... great ...

Malvolio: "Who is this Dani you speak of?"

Grog can't even grasp the concept of multiple choice ... oof ...

Wait ...

Oh they're not doing well at this at all ... so far it's all NEGATIVE points ... what's gonna happen is NOBODY answers ANY of these questions?

Oh boy ... yeah, Veth is TOTALLY horny for the MC right now ...

Oh thank fuck at least CALEB is doing all right ...

Wow ... the trash talk is just ... SO BAD ... Jester: "I have donuts! You want one!" Ummmm ... okay?

Kingsley's all threatening ... and STILL gets it wrong ... ouch ...

Veth: "Caleb, have pity on me! I'm a mother!"

Wait! He's powered by the applause and adulation of the crowd? Interesting ...

Sleight of hand for the answer? It can't hurt .., roll high, Ashley! Meanwhile Veth casts Phantasmal Force? Oh, this is gonna be interesting ... it's all down to AN INTELLIGENCE CHECK? Oh boy ... yeah, Fearne's goose is cooked ...

Wow, this is just a car crash ...

Veth: "Maybe Grog's dumb is spreading!" Grog: "Wouldn't be the first time something I've had has spread."

Take the risk, Veth! It's worth it ... go big or go home!

Veth: "I really don't pay attention when Matt talks!"

Calen just TURNED VETH INTO A SLOTH!!! Or rather DOESN'T ... and she answers correctly! YES!!! She won!

They're tasting the Void? Oof ...

"Tough Shot"? What the hell is THIS shit?

Yeah, Grog doesn't actually know what that word means, mate ... wow ... oh my gods they're good at this one ... bloody hell ... O.O

Liam is truly stone faced ... I'm not at all surprised ...

Beau: "Are you used to having strange liquids in your mouth?" Fearne: "Oh-ho, yes I am."

Wow, they all just KILLED that round ...

He really is a sore loser, isn't he? Back up again ... a "Prarie Fire"? Holy shit ... this is not gonna go well ...

Veth: "I;m gonna lose!" Beau: "No you're not! Pucker your asshole!"

Oh thank fuck ... O.O

Second to last game? Already?

An art challenge? They have to draw while BLINDFOLDED? Holy shit ... O.O

Rollies!

Wow, that was, like, STUPID easy ... yeah, that was a little too biased, methinks ...

Nice ... yeah, that worked out better than I expected, actually. This is NOT going how the bad guys planed at all ...

Malvolio attempts to make Jester throw the round ON PURPOSE ...hmmmmmm ... O.O

Shit ... is she having a crisis of confidence now?

Oh, is it Tusk Love?

Beau: "Wait! I object!" Malvolio: "Overruled!"

A DANCE-OFF?!!! Oh sweet fuck no ... O.O

Charisma checks? Crap ...

Beau attempts to Extract Aspects from the MC ... hmmm ...

Oh yeah, Marisha's about to OWN Travis ...

Travis does the Worm and then a combat roll! Marisha (to Laura, angrily): "You didn't tell me he could do that!"

First round is a tie? Hmmmm ...

Am I getting a bit of a switched dynamic here with the villains? Is that what's going on here?

Thaumaturgy? Now there are little dicks floating around Kingsley ...

When did this turn into a mosh pit?

Yeah! Shake that booty, Fearne!

More applause! Yeah, he's just DRINKING THAT IN ... I am SO SUSPICIOUS right now ...

Veth: "May I ask a question? Is this D&D?"

Jester: "MC, does your mama love you?" Malvolio: "Mrs Contreras is a good mother!"

Wait ... what the fuck just happened?

Yeah, this just got all kinds of fucked up ... something is very off right now ...

Shunted into a green room? Oh, I see ... time for commercials, then ...

Oh, so we're IN the green room right now? Interesting ...

Okay, I think they're getting it ... yeah, clearly the MC is NOT the one who's really in charge here. My money's on Merty ...

Mass Cure Wounds! Yes! Smart move while you can, Jester!

Here he comes, then ... great ...

Yeah, this is definitely the smart play ... keep laying into him, guys. Oh yeah, Beth is SO GOOD at this ... XD

Back on stage, again ...

Holy shit, when did this turn into American Gladiators? Or is it more American Ninja?

Wait, ALREADY? Come on, man! This is not cool ... O.O He's making her dance! I mean it! NOT COOL!!!

Nice jab, Kingsley! and he rolls a NAT1 on his save! Yes! Take that Malvolio!

Inflict Wounds! Go off Jester!

YEAH!!! Roll Initiative!

Beau comes in swinging! CRACK CRACK!!! NAT20!!! Go Beau! Stunning Strike! And he fails his Con save! Yeah!

Wait ... oh that is some BULLSHIT!!! Jester just too the hit instead? Not cool! You douchebag! And now she's STUNNED!

More Dope Monk Shit, then ... second attack MISSES? Bah ... oh, she didn't do well in THIS round ...

Impossibe Trivia? Hmmmm ...

Oh fucking hell, PLEASE remember that fan's name! Oh my GODS!!! River? Balls ... yeah, that didn't work out ... oof ... thank fuck she succeeded that save, then ... that was almost SO BAD ...

Bardic Demoralisation? On Grog? Oh that is a LOW BLOW, MC ... fucking hell Robbie, that's a bit much ... O.O Yeah, that's WAY too effective ...

Merty goes for Veth ... but she just dodges ... and FLICKS HIM IN THE GOOCH while she's at it! Nice ...

Inflict Wounds goes through after all? Nice ... yeah, make this a good roll YES!!! Pefect! BOOSH!!! And it's SEVENTH LEVEL? That's a lot of damage! O.O ... 53 points of Necrotic damage!

Grog would like to RAGE!!! The crowd goes nuts! He makes two Bloodaxe attacks with a Reckless! But at disadvantage? Balls ... yeah, that's right ... so BOTH of them miss ... shit ... but the THIRD ONE HITS BIG TIME ... much better ... 26 points of Slashing damage! But it doesn't do that much? Interesting ...

Kingsley cuts his tongue with his sword and cuts Malvolio's cheek ... okay, what's THIS gonna do? Wow, that is A LOT of dice maths ... 32 points with some Radiant in the mix ... nice ... but yes, there IS something going on in this ... another attack, but this one's at Merty? Interesting ... and it hits ... 22 points on him ...

Legendary action! Merty dives for Jester and FACEPLANTS instead ... oof ...

Veth just starts taunting Malvolio as she casts Phantasmal Force ... oh, that's just CHARMING, Samuel ... oh yeah, that's BRILLIANT ... for a SINGLE POINT of Psychic damage ... hmmm ... but THAT does some REAL damage ... interesting indeed ...

Caleb activates his Stormrider Boots and casts a Dunamantic Immovable Object spell right onto him ... NICE!!! Oh, that is a SERIOUS DC ... I think he's TRAPPED ...

Fearne casts Moonbeam at 6th Level ... and that is DEFINITELY a fail ... nice ... oh yeah, she has GOT HIM ... POW!!! SIX D10s!!! That is a fuckton of damage! Oh, and that REALLY hurts him too!

Mister chucks some flaming shit at him! BOOF!!!

Veth: "You need some toilet paper to wipe that off?"

Legenday Action? Oof ... he reverses his damage at Fearne ... OUCH!!! Oh, and now it hits EVERYONE ... not cool!

Beau: "I'm bad at insults!" Yes. Yes, you are. She starts looking for a camera ... which she might not actually KNOW what it woudl actually LOOK LIKE ... but there is SOMETHING like that dotted around ... hmmm ... so she heads for the hnearest one ... running OVER PEOPLE'S HEADS ... and starts battering the crystal ... BOOM BOOM!!! She's cracked it ... then the second SHATTERS it! Okay, then! That actually SEEMS TO WORK, too! So she goes for the next one and starts beating on that one too ... she cracks it but doesn't kill this one ...

Malvolio's recovering ... hmmm ... Passive Ability: "This Is My Domain"? Cute ... whoa, scene change ... and no cameras? Hmmmm ... can he get out of the coat? Oh, and he's also STILL taking damage from the Moonbeam too ... oh, can Merty help him with this? Nope, first try doesn't do it ... OR the second ... nice ... OH MY GODS that fail just INSTANTLY knocked Malvolio right back to his original form! O.O

Feet pics? Robbie, what are you doing to us? O.O

Insight Check! Roll good, Ashley!

Bardic Demoralisation against Jester! OOF ...

Okay, so what CAN she do, then? Spiritual Weapon! Yes! A giant golden floppy Traveller dick! Thwack upside his head! Oh boy ... yeah, that didn't ultimately go quite as intended, did it? Hmmmm ... that was EXTREMELY funny, though ...

Double Demoralisation ... nice ...

Sacred Flame! And he AUTOMATICALLY fails to save because he's STILL FROZEN!!! Yes! 22 points of Radiant damage! PHWOOSH!!!

Grog goes into a Frenzied Rage! And goes swinging at BOTH the MC AND against the giant god space cock! Oh my GODS, Grog ... Robbie: "Why would you attack the penis?" Travis: "Why would you NOT attack the penis?"

Fucking hell, Matthew ... way to really stump the fumbest person here ... Grog: "Focus Grog, leave the space whale for another day."

Kingsley takes a redirected hit from Grog instead ... DAMN IT!!! But at least he gets ONE hit into Malvolio ... while he determines to leave the space cock for later ...

Malvolio casts 2 Fiery Bolts at Grog ... which both MISS!!! "You can't retcon me in my own game!"

Kingsley tries to stab the hat right off the MC's head ... O.O ... oh my ... roll well, Taliesin ... holy shit, Robbie you are TANKING this game, it's almost painful to watch ... and there goes the hat ... beautiful ... and now KINGLEY is wearing the hat instead ... and he TAKES A BOW ...

Oh my god those horns are TINY ... O.O

Veth appeals to the crowd and gets them to MOCK HIM with their laughter ... nice one ... that's Vicious Mockery, all right ... oh, and they CHOOSE to fail? Nice one ... Yup, now they'reroaring with laughter! Ouch ... that's so nasty and I love it ... oh yeah, he's in trouble ...

That took a dark turn ...

Caleb walks right up to him, puts his hand to his chest and CASTS DISINTEGRATE?!!! Holy fuck ... O.O

Oh my gods ... SERIOUSLY? Not cool! But it is KIND OFcool all the same ... Caleb: "He's behind me, isn't he?"

Blood Curse of the Eyless? PLASE make this work, Tal ...

So that gives Lavolio DISADVANTAGE? But it doesn't hit ... so Caleb casts Shield! But it doesn't work ... CRAP!!!

Mery lunges at Caleb ... oh, that's just nasty ... he's just SHREDDING Caleb right now ... O.O

Fearne walks up to Malvolio and puts her hand on his shoulder and casts a 5th Level Contagion? Okay ... but he RESISTS it? Balls ... and that's an all-or-nothing attack? Shite ... so she tries to WIN HIM OVER to our side instead? Ballsy ... could that actually work?

Yeah, I guess not ...

Beau can NO LONGER smash the cameras ... hmmmm ... she was a little slow on the uptake, it seems ... O.O ... so she uses Step of the Wond to run A HUNDRED FEET BACK and runs OVER the space cock and flips down in front of him. POP POP!!! First misses, but second hits! Stunning Strike! But he succeeds ... nuts ...

ANOTHER stage change ... holy shit, this just got all kinds of meta ... O.O

Awwwwwwww ... this is actually kind of sweet ...

Holy shit, Robbie Daymond what are you DOING TO US right now? You're making me choke up ...

Yeah, that was pretty awesome. Thanks for that, Rob. That may be the coolest thing we've EVER SEEN on this show ...

The Deadly Game? Hmmmmm ...

Fearne and Veth have to make acrobatic checks to prevent being impaled on dorito spikes suddenly coming up out of the floor ... O.O ... and they have to roll AGAINST each other? Oh, that's fiendish ... roll well, guys!

Fearne is OUT?!!! Shit ... and they STILL have one more round ... shit AGAIN ... fuck, Fearne fails TWO DEATH SAVES?!!!

AND he castsBardic Demoralisation on Jester? You bastard ... Merty charges her and she can't do much of ANYTHING to prevent him fucking her up! Oh, except for HELLISH REBUKE!!! And he fails! Nice! 24 points of Cold damage!

And Beau gets a Sentinel attack against Merty? Nice ...

Jester rushes for Fearns while she attacks the MC again with the phantom cock ... which does FUCK ALL ... and she gets hurt getting to Fearne ... but she casts a 5th Level Mass Cure Wounds ... to heal Fearne and herself ... 25 points each ... and Fearne is BACK!!! Phew ...

Grog smashes the Titanstone Knuckles together to get MASSIVE, then goes swinging at Malvolio ... BRUTAL CRITICAL!!! But he pulls Fearne in front of him so SHE takes the samage instead ... and she's OUT again! NOOOOOO!!!

Grog: "This has happened once before! Why does this keep happening to me?" Fearne: "I have a vague memory of this ..."

Kingsley tries to make a VERY PRECISE Occult Shot directly at the back of Malvolio's neck ... YES!!! 24 points of damage! PING! Away flies the gem ...

Oh wow, what the hell even IS HE now?

Wow ... this just got VERY SPECIFICALLY surreal ... O.O

Yeah! Make him dance! Nice one, Veth ...

OKay, that is just EMBARRASSING ... I love it ...

Wait ... is that IT? O.O

Yeah, he's just gone ... but what about Fearne?

It is STILL surreal ... oh Robbie, I gotta love your commitment to the bit ...

Jester heals Fearne back up again before they're all shot back to their respective places in reality ... thank fuck ...

That was supremely weird and deeply fucked up ... in the best way ... but IS THAT definitely it for good, then?

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sanyu-thewitch05 · 11 months ago

Text

Yandere Prince x Witch! Reader pt. 2

TW: Drugging mention, abortion mention, violence, honestly just the ordeal of waking up and finding out you're pregnant.

WANNA GET ME A ☕?

Five Months Ago...

"I need it. I need the reassurance she'll love me when I pick her," Helia said, walking into The Woods.

The Woods have light peaking from the tall trees, vines in the sky, and houses of flying creatures in the tree branches. Like an ecosystem, the fairytale characters and creatures that aren't in a castle harmoniously live in the Woods as a community. Near the lakes and streams are where the mermaids and nymphs live. The forest grounds are where mostly minotaurs, elves, fairies, dragons, and dwarfs live. Meanwhile, the sky has the harpies, phoenixes, and others. But everywhere in the forest has witches, vampires, and other magical beings to find and chat with.

"Excuse me, Mr. Elf, do you know where to find someone who can make a love potion?" Helia asked, tapping on the elf's shoulder.

"Oh wow, another royal in these woods. Luckily, you'll find what you seek right in front of you. My friend Y/N made extra potions of the highest quality with the most potent ingredients for the upcoming ball of Prince Helia," The elf responds, handing Helia a vile of pink liquid.

"Do the people who requested this potion want to use it on the prince?" Helia asks, giving the elf some golden coins. "And what does this friend of yours look like? Is she a witch?

"Haha! No. Let's just say gala and ball babies are trendy," The elf laughs, creeping out Helia. "But if you want to see her, look there."

Helia looks at the sunny Woods' path and sees a witch with a basket of herbs, fruit, and meat.

"She's beautiful," Helia thought, embodying the feeling of being bewitched.

Helia returns to his castle and doesn't look back at the woods, for if he did, he'd never return.

~~~~~~~~~~

It's been six months since the ball, and your relationship with Helia couldn't be better. However, that's because after the first love potion dose wore off on Helia, he's been giving you doses so you can't wake up from your lovely dream. But more importantly, the two of you have been preparing for the arrival of your baby girl, Maya.

"How's my beloved wife doing?" Helia asks, crawling onto the bed and rubbing your big stomach.

"You're gone too long. You missed our little girl kicking when I ate some peppers," You say, kissing your husband.

"Aw, sorry I missed your feeding time, baby," Helia coos, kissing your stomach. "How about this? I'll give you extra cuddles while we sleep."

"No complaints from me as long as I get free access to your cock if I get horny," You say, pulling back the covers and letting your husband in.

"Deal."

Helia climbs into bed and spoons you as sleep creeps up on you for the 45th time today. You wake up at 3 am, your body floating a foot in the air. Questions run through your fatigued body as you process your surroundings. A mirror sparkles in the moonlight, and you see the silhouette of your pregnant belly.

"Wha?" You whisper, subconsciously feeling the other side of the bed as if someone was supposed to be there.

You get up and look at your body. Your stomach is large with child, and your breasts are big and swollen with milk. You stare at your reflection in horror, touching your stomach and confirming your new reality. A whimper escapes your lips, and you sink to the ground. Your fetus kicks your stomach, and your whimpers turn into cries.

"Stop moving!" You cry, your nails digging into your stomach.

Your fetus kicks more and more, making you look for a way out of the bedroom. You see an uneven wall and run towards it, hitting the wall for a secret opening. Eventually, you hit the right spot, and an opening appears, leading to a dark passageway with cobblestone stairs spiraling downward. You put a hand on the wall to help keep your balance and go down the stairs, hoping for an escape. When you reach the end, you take your first step toward freedom as you walk on the crisp new grass of spring.

"Into the Woods I go," You say, walking away from the castle and to your home.

It's a silent walk on the way home as the village surrounding the castle is asleep. With only you, your fetus, and your thoughts, you begin to talk to your daughter.

"You know, I thought about trying to find someone to abort you, but it wouldn't matter anyway. No one on this land, Woods or not, would do it. Ever since the royal family passed the lineage law a century ago, nobody could abort a fetus of royal lineage, illegitimate or not. The last time someone did that led to everyone not human living in The Woods. It's not your fault you're inside me, it's not my fault I'm pregnant with you, it's not our fault we were in that castle," You say, stumbling into the lively Woods.

As you walk the village's dirt roads, the castle erupts with noise. You hear horses leaving their stables and running out.

"No, no," You groan, walking into the Woods faster.

"Find Queen Y/N, and bring her back to the castle or King Helia. Do not harm her!" The royal head knight commands, making you run further into the Woods.

The Woods become dark, and the liveliness you love and know becomes non-existent.

"I must be in the Fairytale district," You say, holding your stomach as you trek through the dark woods full of thorns, shrubbery, and trees that seem to be closing in.

"My love," Helia says, seeing your figure in the woods.

You run, tearing your dress as it gets caught in the thorns.

"Y/N, my love! Wait! You'll hurt yourself!" Helia yells, making his horse speed up.

You jump over a fallen tree and try not to focus on the pain from your feet.

"Leave me alone!" You yell, sliding down a steep hill.

You think you can handle the speed, but suddenly, you're sliding out of control. You scream as you head toward a dark valley full of fog and embrace your stomach, preparing for the worst. A hand grabs your arm at the last minute, and you're dangling an inch above raging rapids. Helia carries you back up, and you both rest on the forest floor.

"Are you crazy? You could've gotten yourself killed!" Helia screams, grabbing your shoulders.

"It would've been better than whatever was going on in that castle!" You scream, holding your stomach. "Do you know what it's like waking up and not knowing what happened to your body? What happened to yourself, and why you can't recognize places that feel familiar?"

"All you had to do was stay as my sweet wife, but it's my fault. I didn't give you another dose of love in time. But I won't make that mistake again," Helia states, pulling out a syringe filled with a love potion.

"No! No, please!" You beg, holding Helia's hands.

"Just stay still, and it'll all be over!" Helia screams, trying to stab your neck.

"NO!"

Magic shoots out of your body, flinging Helia across the forest. The silence from the forest takes over, leaving you with your tears and your baby's kicks.

"I'm sorry, May-Maya-no, May. That's right, May. I'm sorry, May. I shouldn't have hurt your daddy," You ramble, crawling to Helia's body.

You grab the syringe and use your magic to incinerate it. Then, you tap on your husband's cheeks for a sign of life. If his body is found in The Woods, it'll be the end of the magical and supernatural creatures in the kingdom.

"Helia, please. Please wake up," You beg, lightly slapping his cheeks.

"Mm...my love, you didn't leave," Helia groans, weakly holding your hand.

You couldn't leave. Not if you wanted any semblance of a future for your friends and family.

"Hey, how about we read parenting books, and have dinner?" You suggest, hoping he will not wonder where the love potion went.

"Queen Y/N, what happened to King Helia?" The head knight asks, jumping off his horse.

"A bear was about to attack me. Helia defended me and got wounded in the battle," You lie, holding Helia's hand.

"Guards, take King Helia to the infirmary for treatment and get the royal doctor and wizard. I'll take Queen Y/N back to her quarters," The head knight commands, picking you up and putting you on his horse.

And so, the witch and the prince return to their castle. Their unborn child is as calm as ever as the witch opens a book with a stork carrying a baby on the cover. The prince, now king, curls up next to his wife, his hand rubbing her belly. The witch hiding her disgust and she turns the next page.

#sanyuthewitch05 #yandere prince #yandere king #witch!reader #yandere x reader

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