#might end up deleting this tbh im so self conscious of my writing lol

[ambalambs]

I ended up writing a little something on Asra for once and maybe its late enough now I dont have to be embarrassed to post it and have too many people see it xD but idk I just felt like sharing cuz he's fun to explore and ive been consumed with his voidsent's backstory lately. Again im not good at writing but im having fun with it :'D also Leon belongs to the lovely @e-dragoons u3u

Asra finally slumped himself down against one of the many trees on the Sharlyan campus. It was a particularly warm day so the shade was welcome. He took a brief moment to take in the scenery, the sounds of the nearby river rushing along, the birds in the tree above him, the wind in the reeds and leaves. For a moment if he closed his eyes he could almost trick himself into believing he was back home in the forest.

But reminiscing was not why he was here. He quickly gathered up the reeds he'd harvested and set about weaving himself a basket. It was a silly thing to be doing really, what with the more modern cultures having plenty of shops with baskets already fully made and available for purchase. But Asra needed something to occupy his time. Leon and the rest of the scions were conducting their heroic daring-do in the library and he was of no use in such an environment. Probably more of a distraction really. So he resigned to a moment to himself on the grounds and once these reeds growing by the river had caught his eye he knew exactly how to waste his time.

He expertly began to braid and weave the strands together in smooth and quick motions. It had been some time since he'd made anything quite like this but the fingers never forget and as he let them do the work his mind was left to wander.

He was suddenly reminded of the time he made his first basket. He was so young, a small kit at the time. His older sister had sat him down and helped teach him claiming they had to hurry up and make some while the berries in the meadow were ripe.

Thinking back now it seemed like such silly timing for a lesson when they should've just gotten already made baskets if they were in such a hurry.

But at the time he was too young to question it. So he followed her instructions as best he could and crafted a basket of incredibly questionable durability. But he was so proud and his sister seemed satisfied enough with his work that the two immediately set out to gather their quarry.

Once their baskets were filled to the brim, although some berries being consumed along the harvest, they began to make their way back to the village. But tragedy struck when the bottom of Asra's basket had come completely unraveled, spilling the entire contents of the berries within. It was only then did he realize he had been leaving a trail of berries along the entire trail and had been stepping on them the entire way. Feeling heartbroken at the loss and embarrassment that only a young child can experience, Asra had begun to cry. His sister had quickly ran to his aid and did what she could to dry his tears and gather whatever berries could be salvaged into her own basket. She somehow managed to calm him down enough to guide them the rest of the way back home and by then Asra had calmed down and the two were able to sit and enjoy the berries from his sister's basket. As they munched and Asra observed his destroyed basket mournfully, his sister promised to help him get it right the next time.

Asra smiled softly at the memory. Such a memory of his sister brought up others then. Small moments in their childhood. Most happy, some sad, some just silly. Moments that felt like an entire lifetime ago.

"You miss her." Asra jumped slightly at the familiar and unwanted voice inside his head. He suddenly realized his lapse of focus in the moment. Moments like this when he almost feels as though he's alone and forgets to keep the wall up in himself against his unwanted passenger were rare. He quickly ran a check over that wall and catching the small window that had formed within it. The wall itself was still firm, keeping the creature at bay on the other side. But it was there and it was watching and had gotten a full view of his reminiscing.

Asra paused in his weaving then and did a quick scan about his surroundings. It didn't seem like anyone was around to hear his mad ramblings so he judged it was safe to respond outloud.

"I do, yes," he said softly. Funny how responding to the voidsent lurking in his mind aloud made him feel less crazy. Anyone to witness though would no doubt feel otherwise.

There was a pause then. Asra held his breath as he waited for that brief wave of exhaustion to run over him. The telltale sign of the voidsent feeding off his own aether while his emotions were full of sadness and longing for those halcyon days. However that feeling didn't come and Asra, though suspicious, let out the breath.

"You claim to miss her but that seems awfully silly with how you little rabbits live," the voice finally continued. Its voice was uncharacteristically casual. Although in hindsight it had been as such more often lately, Asra noted. "When I found you hadn't you already left her?"

Briefly Asra tried not to think about the moment it had "found him" so he quickly shoved that memory down. He instead looked out at the water in the river before him rushing by, chewing his cheek in thought.

"It's different now, I think," Asra began. "Before, its tradition and my duty to return home every few years so it was always guaranteed I'd see her again. But now..."

Asra paused. Now...yes what about now? He glanced in the direction of the library. He thought about Leon then. Of all the places they'd already journeyed, the lives they'd saved, the lands they'd seen that he could never have dreamed existed. Before, when he was first burdened with this occursed creature bound to his soul, he believed he was still serving his duty to his tribe by taking the danger with him out of the wood. He even kept his forest name in the foolish belief that he hadn't technically left the wood if he was still protecting it by leaving. But things were different now. Felt different. The thought of leaving Leon and the scions caused more pain in his heart than the thought of never returning home now.

"But now it's harder knowing I may never return at all. That it means I really will never see her again," Asra continued. He waited again for that feeling of the voidsent feeding knowing this wave of emotions was ripe for the picking for it. But again nothing came.

After a moment the creature spoke again, "I see..."

Suddenly a flash of a memory that was not his struck Asra like a lightning bolt. He jerked at the suddenness of it, his hands gripping the half made basket in his hands. It was just a moment of a memory. As if he was looking briefly through another's eyes at a young man. His hair jet black, his eyes a soft green. He'd seen eyes like that before. They were a near match to the ones he'd seen belonging to his unwanted passenger but instead of the pale sickly green that matched that of moss on a pale corpse, these were soft. A color more akin to grass dusted by the frost of an early dawn. The young man was looking back at him and he flashed a bright grin, a laugh escaping him. Asra felt like he had to squint just looking at him. The man was so bright. Like he was a beacon of light.

But then there was a cascading wave of emotions that came crashing down upon him all at once.

Love. Admiration. Pride. Hope. Love. Pain. Loss. Grief. Grief. Grief. Love. Hollow. Anger. Betrayal. Hate. Rage. Rage. RAGE. RAGE.

And then there was one word that almost seemed to scream through his mind: Brother.

Just as quickly as the flash appeared it was suddenly yanked away. Asra gasped audibly at the abrupt absence of it, gasping for breath that he didnt realize he had been holding. It felt as if someone had struck him across the head and he was reeling as he tried to recover. It was only then did he realize the loud hiss that was ringing in his head. Asra found himself reaching out for that wall between them in his mind and felt himself recoil. It was not just the wall he had made now, no. There was a darkness enshrouding it, keeping himself at bay.

"I-I'm sorry," Asra stammered, not exactly sure what he was apologizing for. The brief moment of accessing a memory he wasn't supposed to see? For whatever caused these emotions that were clearly the voidsent's from a life before?

"Keep your pity, little rabbit, and leave me be," the voidsent snarled. The casual nature of his words before were now gone and the familiar animalistic venom had returned. Asra winced at the volume of it as it rang through his mind.

He tried to take a moment to compose himself then. Steadying his breathing and recollecting his thoughts. There had been times when the voidsent had let its own memories slip through. They were mostly ones of its mortal life, moments of its cruelty even then. They were never like this though. Something unbidden and so rich with emotions. So strong.

Finally after a moment of silence Asra glanced down at the crushed basket in his still tight grip. He relaxed his fists and tried to smooth out the weaves, finally sighing heavily as the tension in his mind began to calm. The voidsent was silent, curled within a corner behind the wall it had reinforced. Asra chewed on his lip a moment.

"Im sorry...It's hard losing someone you care about," he said. Not really sure why he felt the need to say it considering all the torment this creature had put him through. But all the same whoever that man the memory was, he...was good. Asra had felt certain of that and the man deserved some kind of word.

The only reply Asra received was a guttural snarl. He half expected more. Maybe a tear at his aether but again surprisingly nothing came.

Asra waited a bit longer, the silence becoming painfully obvious that this would be the end of their exchange for the day. He took one final glance at the library and the surrounding area around him self consciously hoping nobody witnessed whatever it was he just experienced. When it seemed he was in the clear he quickly straightened himself up against the tree, wiped the tears that were not his from his eyes, and tried his best to return to crafting the basket in his hands.