#might delete this later cuz I'm kinda embarrassed about it but. i feel like every little thing is going to make me burst into tears lol

[somelazyassartist]

I am having. A very emotional night. Not over anything bad I'm just horribly emotional over like everything right now including happy stuff and using it as an excuse to draw my fursona again

[hella-free-space]

Oh shoot I forgot to hit anon on that last ask. Please just reply to this one or reply to the other one privately. Gosh I'm so embarrassed.

-- i accidentally posted the non-private ask, so i deleted it asap. i only thought to copy the response and not the ask cuz i’m lame af, but this answer was more of an answer directed to anon specifically and not necessarily an educational post that for later referencing like with some of my other posts, so i’ll leave my answer here --i’m gonna start with a personal experience: i have adouble-tail halfmoon betta, his name is mr. percival b. beans (usually you cansearch ‘beans’ on my blog and find him), he’s a very beautiful and colorful andheavily-finned boy-o…who has now bitten off most of his tail fin :T his tankhas 2 large swords and a large ornament centerpiece and he has lots of thingsto rest on in his little 5 gallon tank (he even uses the betta hammock thatnone of my other kiddos would use). he kinda floats odd when he’s near thesurface but it doesn’t seem to be a swim bladder issue, just that he floats atan angle because of his weighted fins. after seeing a post about someoneeuthanizing their betta because of incurable fin-biting i kind of stepped backand looked at my fish too. i usually don’t post my tanks because they’reusually a mess (hair algae, plants that should be pruned, etc.), but with him idont know if i’d post him+his fins unless i was making aneducational/discussion-oriented post…i dont think people would be mean to me orsuggest that i euthanize him or anything like that, though…i just feel badbecause it’s not like he can tell me how i can make his life easier or if ieven can and i dont know for sure if i’m doing a Good Job or not, so i feellike i understand where you’re coming from with having a betta that bites…

i shared cuz i dont want you to feel alone, and i’m surewe’re not the only ones who feel worried or nervous about sharing our bettas~but there are plenty of people on here who have larger-finned bettas that nipand still love and care for their fish the best that they can and share theirfish with the rest of the community and they’re loved and supported becausethey’re a part of this community

also, on the euthanizing: it’s a very personal decision. theperson i talked about above chose to euthanize their fish, because they felttheir fish’s quality of life was dismal or declining. i choose to not euthanizemy fish because he eats and swims and is otherwise healthy. so far into myfishkeeping journey, i’ve found that if a fish wants to live, it’s gonna live,and if it doesn’t want to, then it wont…which is generally why people don’trecommend euthanizing sick fish unless the fish seems to have completely givenup and won’t eat/won’t swim/can’t be cured and is quickly declining. i wouldn’tthink any less of someone who chose to euthanize their fish, though, and idon’t think any less of you for choosing not to euthanize

on the tank size: smaller tanks are generally recommendedfor larger-finned fish. i wouldn’t put my silver delta tail boy or my doubletail boy in a 10 gallon, even though they’d have more space – well, becausethey’d have more space…

i’m sure that not every fish is the same, but with my doubletail boy, i had him in a 2.5 gallon until it started to leak (i had planned ongetting a 5 gallon anyways so it worked out tho i guess)…he didn’t bite at allin the 2.5 and seemed to do pretty well, even though it was small…i moved himto the 5 and he started nipping, so i lowered the water level and added moreplants and stuff but the biting hasn’t declined. i lowered the water levelbecause i’ve heard that it helps with going to the surface…but im actuallythinking about moving him to a 3 gallon that i have or going and picking up a2.5 gallon because he swims around the whole tank. which is good because he’sactive and exploring, but i think because he feels the need to swim around theentirety of his territory (aka his 5 gallon) he gets v tired and frustrated byhis fins and bites them off so he can swim around longer without getting astired. (i assume that this is where the largest argument for euthanizing comesfrom, that if they can’t display their natural behaviors without selfmutilation then they cannot live a ‘healthy’ life. i disagree, but i understandwhere this argument is coming from.) so in a smaller tank, he’d still have roomto swim around and stuff but he wouldn’t have to patrol as large of an area andmight feel less of a need to tire himself out and then bite his fins…not sureif it’ll work but i have a 3 gallon on my counter so i figure it can’t hurt totry.

also, i dont know if it makes you feel any less alone, butthere are quite a few people i’ve seen/know on tumblr that keep their bettas intanks under 5 gallons and also don’t get judged or get rude/hate comments ontheir posts/blog because of it…sometimes its a space thing or their betta doesbetter in a smaller tank (i should mention tho that i wouldn’t go any smallerthan 2.5 gallons due to possibly having an unstable cycle). i’m sure there aresome blogs that aren’t as understanding about people with smaller tanks orfin-biting bettas, but the vast majority of bettablrs/fishblrs promote a kind,inviting, and understanding atmosphere and encourage others to do the same. ithink it’s one thing to look at someone’s tank and go “wow, that’s an awesomeexample i should try to emulate!” and another to say “wow, that’s an awesometank and mine doesn’t look like that so i feel bad now”. i genuinely believethat people here enjoy lifting each other up and encouraging best-practiceswithout endorsing one-upping or a holier-than-thou type of approach. if youwant to post your tank and your fish, i dont think you have anything to fearfrom others in the community

i guess i just want you to know that a 5 gallon is okay(even if its tall) and that you’re still providing a good home for your boy andhis fin-biting may not be something that you can fix, and that’s okay

[lollytea]

I'm kind of scared to talk to you because I tried once and it felt like I was just annoying you and I tried sending asks with that account once or twice off anon but I still think I was being weird and I ended up deleting it. I'm sorry if you thought I was weird.

Aww friendo, its not your fault I promise. Listen I feel like other people were a little disappointed by this too but I should mention that I’m WAY different in private messages than in asks. Unless I know you well, that is. There’s only a few people I’m comfortable messaging regularly. I’m kinda reserved. I mention a lot that I have a problem answering messages too cuz I’m a lil recluse who often doesn't wanna converse.

But I can never remember being legitimately annoyed by a message. Not ever. Like I’m not gonna discourage anyone messaging me. Anybody’s welcome. But I might answer, I might not. Either way, I’m not annoyed by you. I have nothing against you. I might even see your message and smile at it even if I don't reply. I’m just not much of a talker sometimes. (”but you never shut up when answering asks?” ye but that's different)

Also I don't answer every ask I get so don't worry about that either. Sometimes I get too much to answer them all, sometimes I don't know what to say to them or how to answer them, sometimes I see them, say I’ll reply later, forget and am too embarrassed to reply several days later once I remember. And sometimes tumblr just eats them. It varies.

I don't know who you are but just know I’ve got no problem with you whatsoever. I’m just kinda a hopeless communicator. Don't worry about it. You keep doin you buddy.