#middle is one of my all time fave photos of him

[saitseeing]

i walk with my eyes open but i use my hands to shield them from the sun

✦ wooseok in soft primaries

[nenoname]

Gravity Falls DVD Commentary Highlights

(just a huge, and I mean huge, dump of random quotes that stuck out to me, which I sorta separated into characters+their relationships and it's probably gonna be obvious that Stan is my fave lmao

I dunno how to make this legible for anyone but whatever, just take all these rando character tidbits. Stan Twin pranks! Sonployee essays! The concept for a post-Weirdmageddon episode that Alex insists is just too miserable but I want it anyway! The Pines family making me cry!)

Stan

"We love the idea of Stan [in Boss Mabel] having a minute to uh, having a context where we want to see him be his worst self and seeing his big brash personality in like a setting that everyone can understand, because the Mystery Shack is a little bit ungrounded because he's in his world of his characters, but seeing him out in the outside world is funny weird."

We really enjoyed the fact that he's as awful as ever and he's rewarded for it. We like those anti-morals where Stan uses his terribleness to succeed incredibly well.

I think it was a little hard for people to understand in the writer's room at the beginning of the series was that, even though Stan is following a lot of these tropes of being a miser, he's not grumpy. Like he actually loves being himself. He really revels in it like even though he's got some kind of sorrow inside, his kind of day-to-day like he's more about just the uncle who loves to hear himself and make dumb jokes than he is somebody who's mean or cruel or cynical per se.

The [NWHS] storyboards managed to make Stan this awesome action hero while still keeping him Stan. Like I like the fact that he steals a wallet in the middle of it. He steals a wallet, he smashes somebody against the wall, he sasses him but he also has this just great Inception moment. And it's because we're building to a big question about “who is Stan?”, I felt a moment of seeing him be kind of awesome further increases your “who is this guy?” He keeps going back and forth between like “oh geez my back” and you're like “all right that's the Stan I know” and then like “whoa, he just did an awesome jailbreak! Is he some kind of super villain? Who is he really?

There's more of Ford in Stan than I think Stan realizes that I think only comes out in certain moments.”

Why did Stan keep a clipping of himself titled “grifter at large”? I think he thought he looked cool in that picture. “You know I kind of have a Clint Eastwood look in this grifter at large photo. I think maybe I'll use this as an About the Author one day. I gotta hold on to this one. You know what, I'm a criminal but I'm a nostalgic criminal! Loving the past is my greatest crime now!”

I know how Stan feels in this [Principal talking to his family] scene, when somebody comes in and says like “You know what? There was a race you didn't know you were running and you're already behind, way behind.” 

And you know even though Stan is a guy who looks like he's having a fun time, I always, in my gut, thought of him as somebody who is a huge well of sadness, a loss of human connection. And that need to please, that trying to get laughs from the crowd and constantly telling dumb jokes and you know putting on a big show in the Mystery Shack, he's trying to get from them the affection that he never got from his family and lost with his brother.

Stan has been waiting for years to have a reunion with his brother. He's always felt like a screw-up. Stan once again had an idea of how he thought things were going to go. He thought that his brother was saying “I need your help” for the first time. He's going to go up there, they're gonna have some drinks, they're gonna catch up and instead he ended up shoving his brother into another dimension and running out of food and money. It's sort of his worst nightmare. But this was Stan's entire character, from the very beginning of the series, was built around this idea that he's living with this tragedy. He's a guy who outwardly seems like he doesn't appreciate family but in fact wants it more than anything in the world and feels like maybe he's not worthy of it and would do anything to prove that he is.

Seeing Stan figure out what he's good at felt important to me. Like he's never been good at anything in his life and he makes a stupid hokey joke and it suddenly turns into a profit. I felt like without [showing how the Mystery Shack was created], I was missing something and understanding why he would do this, how this would be the solution to his problem.

We would like the idea that Stan appears to win through dumb luck, that it's sort of Intelligence versus Guts but Stan wouldn't actually bet everyone's life on a dice roll. He's a cheater! At the end of the day, I believe Stan has been thrown out of Vegas for counting cards and for weighing dies and I believe he could con his way out of any game, particularly for an obnoxious wizard like this. The idea that Stan would gamble everyone on pure chance is like no. No, he's got a plan. This is the guy who escaped prison using gravity leaps, he's got a way out.

The one big thing [The Stanchurian Candidate] does is really highlights Stan's inferiority complex compared to his brother. Part of what he's doing is he's trying to be an important man here and this episode is actually a pretty good setup in many ways for Weirdmageddon Part 3. When we see Ford they're all going on this rescue mission to rescue Ford and this episode shows you just how much Stan wants to be the hero like the reason that he can't shake Ford's hand when they're in that circle.  The cold open of this where he sees everyone loves Ford and now that Ford's back, he's the best. Stan's like “well, how about I run for mayor!” It's just to boost his ego and make him feel better about himself.

Dipper and Mabel

“Straight man protagonists are really hard to write because every other character had a comedic hook. We understand that Soos is kind of this weirdo, his brain is in another place. Mabel has this exuberance and sees the best in every situation and is very creative. Stan is a crooked conman. Dipper is… the normal guy and a character like that can often feel like they don’t have agency, start to feel just reactive.

Waddles is Mabel's only love that lasts the summer. Mabel is very prone to love at first sight and Waddles is able to love back with Mabel's degree of love.

[In Sock Opera] Mabel's in love with Gabe, Dipper's in love with the Author and they're both willing to do something crazy to get get closer to that thing

There kept being layers of adjustment to make it, “okay what would it take to get Dipper to make a deal with Bill?”  1: He would have to not understand the rules of the deal. He's been tricked, he thinks he's just giving a puppet, he didn't know was himself. Classic genie rules, you get what you wish for in a way you didn't expect.  2: There's a little ticking clock that just started, which if he doesn't do it by now, he's gonna lose all this.  3: Bill rightfully points out that Mabel has been kind of not sacrificing for him and he maybe needs another ally right now  4: He was sleep deprived and actually you'll notice that Dipper blinks right before Bill arrives and that's our way of suggesting that that countdown might not have even existed

I think Dipper and Mabel are of equal exact intelligence but Dipper's insecure. He sees his accomplishments as a way to make himself better and thus is motivated to focus on things that are accomplishment type things. And Mabel is very confident and likes having fun and when she's having a good time, she has a little tunnel vision for the people and the things around her. That's one of her biggest flaws. She's actually really, really sweet when she notices and understands your pain but not when she's doing a bit, when she's doing a scene, when she's doing a gag.

Ford

Originally [the fake Author] looked a little bit more like an oddball wacky inventor and I felt he had to be pretty idiosyncratic. There's certain color things about him you'll notice. He's more or less got the color scheme of the Journal, you know maroons and golds, so that you kind of feel instinctively like maybe that's him. A lot of these motifs though we would end up using in Ford's design, as well the gloves and the coat and all that but much cooler later on but preparing you, it's Ford Lite. 

Now this is there's no logical reason that Ford would break [the warnings about the portal] up into all these books this way but up until this point he's been shown as this sort of all-knowing mysterious Puzzle Master that it felt appropriate, even though it's not logical.

It works for the storytelling so when Ford wrote that, that's when he was super sleep deprived. He realized that Bill had betrayed him, he was starting to have a hard time differentiating between fantasy and reality, he was losing sleep and scribbling all sorts of lunatic serial killer looking stuff about the end of the world.

In Time Traveler’s Pig, we see what should be a young Stanford Pines even though again, the design's a little off but we knew big sideburns, bushy hair. Although that Stanford looked a little bit more swole than this guy and that's one of the what we thought were very subtle clues in season one that helped a lot of fans figure figure everything out way too soon.

[Using the memory gun on the agents scene] needs to show that Ford's really awesome and so we could get rid of the agents and show that Ford can pretty much handle anything that Stan can't and also call back to our memory ray all in one.

There was a lot of fan speculation when we first met Ford. Generally when television shows introduce a new mysterious character late in the game, they turn out to be a villain like 9 out of 10 times. They turn out to be a villain or they're there to get killed off to show the stakes of something and like we could have made Ford evil but I always felt that that would be less interesting. The point that I was trying to get to is that Stan and Ford had this relationship that fell apart and it was both of their faults and I thought that if I'm Stan, I'd be more frustrated if Ford is actually a good guy. It would drive me insane if he's pretty reasonable, pretty rational, better at me than everything.

So we've flirted with this brief moment where it seems like he's a villain and we worked really hard to make it so that like his eyes are being covered by the reflection of the light. His dialogue is ambiguous enough here that for a moment you believe what Dipper believes, which is “maybe he's possessed by Bill.” You just saw him shaking Bill's hand, what is he supposed to believe?

I like that Ford has this photo with him, he had for a really really long time all the way through multiple dimensions. And he's probably told himself- I almost imagined if McGucket found that photo in his coat while they were working on the portal or something, like “What's this here?” and Ford would say “oh yes, that's a photo of a very important moment! That's when I…  that's when I first decided I want to be an inventor!” There would be no reference to the real reason he's keeping it. “This is me and my brother.” It would be like, ��oh yes I was thinking about science as a horizon, a frontier to reach towards– you know like a boat, like a ship, like science! It's about science!”

Soos

You choose family. That you create over the course of your life and if that somebody earns being your family, like the Mystery Shack. These kids and Stan, they’re Soos' family and he's happy about that.

I feel like Soos gained something out of [Blendin’s Game]. He gains the knowledge that like “I'm tired of thinking about this man who I'm missing, who doesn't care about me. I'm going to concentrate on the people in front of me, the people that are my true family.”

Soos is a fan of the show even though he's in it. He's a big fan of Gravity Falls and [NWHS] killed him.

I always knew what I wanted Soos’ end to be Soos running the Mystery Shack. I imagine that Soos is actually way better at giving tours than Stan is because he loves all that stuff truly and he believes it. That's part of the difference. Stan’s like “um, all right suckers, this stagnant puddle is the befuddle puddle!” while Soos is like “yeah, one time I looked in there, I think i saw like a cyclops dude. Like, I really think I saw one! Like it might have been a reflection combining my pupils, but like?” and people are like “Whoa, really??”

McGucket

They hired a bunch of people and then they erased their memory. That’s my explanation for why there's like such amazing inventions that would take whole teams of people. McGucket secretly hired a number of contractors and erased their minds. Like I think of McGucket as being like a really sweet nice guy completely in over his head who just like “oh well, once I've erased one guy's mind, I gotta erase ten more guys’ minds to cover it up” and it just sort of builds into like “I guess I'm kind of this kingpin of crime and I'm starting a cult I didn't mean to. Whoopsy daisy!”

When we get to Ford and see their backstory and see their relationship, it just makes all the stuff that happens with the portal and what happens with Ford and all that more poignant that he had someone there who was not only his friend but also a voice of reason and telling him to stop and that he wouldn't listen to him, as opposed to Ford being down there on his own with nobody to bounce off, anybody to say “hey wait a minute, is this a good idea?”

“McGucket was the assistant and he was maybe this assistant who was sort of put upon and Ford kind of brought a college buddy together with him. You know Ford as somebody who lost Stan, and even though he rejected his brother, he kind of needs that other person and he tried to find that in this kind of sweet prodigy and he just pushed him too far.

[The test scene] is meant to show sort of what it was that McGucket needed to erase, what it was that drove him to madness. It was partially seeing the Nightmare Verse and the way it messed with his head and also partly just realizing that this thing has apocalyptic consequences and he doesn't want to be a part of it. And if he can't destroy it or talk Ford out of something, he can forget about it.

Because If Ford's weakness is pride, McGucket's weakness is weakness. He's got a kind heart and he can't stop people, he can't destroy things. I mean he should have basically knocked Ford out with a wrench and take this thing apart piece by piece. He's the one who understood how to build it but I think he's kind of a follower and I think he's the kind of person who could get suckered in by a cult leader. He’s the kind of person looking for instruction and he really respects Stanford and can't bring himself to uh, he's like “I just got out of a bunker! I don't want to go work for another guy down in another bunker! This is my third doomsday cult this year!”

Stan and the kids

Stan and Mabel have such a different life perspective it seemed natural that at some point they would get to a major conflict

Seeing Grunkle Stan and Dipper bond like, I sort of believe that both of them are bad with women and both of them would rather believe there's a giant conspiracy than that they have they just can't get ladies 

Can this idea about Mabel's relationship with Waddles actually reveal a rift between Mabel and Stan where Mabel and Stan actually get along pretty well in the series you know? When they they're both such strong stubborn personalities that when they conflict, they conflict hard like in Boss Mabel. But this idea that Waddles is sort of a metaphor for what Mabel loves and Stan loves Mabel but he doesn't really think that anything she thinks is necessarily smart or right. He loves her like “guys she's my sweet niece but she doesn't know anything you know? She doesn't know anything about a pig” She forgives a lot with Stan but like Waddles sort of represents like the purity of her deepest love and the idea that Stan would threaten that is genuinely a shock

In the previous season it ends with Dipper giving up his journal and there was a lot of argument about “oh is it lame if he just gets his journal back?” Another thing we struggled with, we knew that Stan knows the importance of this journal he wouldn't give the journal back to Dipper so it was a bit of a convolution we'd written ourselves into a corner. We wrote ourselves out, we said “okay he's photocopied it. he's giving it to Dipper because he knows that Dipper's really precocious and he'll never stop asking.”

“We knew that we wanted everything to come to a head when the kids are going to discover Stan's secret and they're going to discover it in such a way that they only get little bits and pieces and they have to decide for themselves based on the limited information. Is Stan's a good guy or if he's a bad guy? Ultimately that decision will be a decision of heart versus mind. And Dipper's mind, Mabel is heart and they're fighting with the scraps of information they have.  Should we trust our heart about how we feel about this guy over the course of the summer and everything we've been through or should we trust the clues? That seemed like a believable way to get Dipper and Mabel to begin a rift between them that is resolved by the end of the series.”

The way Stan acts in [NWHS] is like, to me part of what feels so grounded about it is like I'm a child of divorce and like I know that when parents or parent figures know that hard times are coming for the kids. They kind of lay it on thick they're like who wants ice cream you know what I mean? Like Stan being extra nice to them at the beginning is like it's kind of a realistic thing that that adults do when they know like big changes are coming.

I felt it was really important that we added the scene where they're at maximum bonding. They're up on the roof, they're shooting firecrackers. Stan knows in his heart that when his brother arrives everything is going to change in ways he can't predict and he's really savoring this moment because he knows, even if things goes completely smoothly, which they don't. the kids are still going to be mad at him, especially Dipper for basically lying.  They had this big meeting after the end of Scaryoke where of course Dipper also crossed his finger but Stan crosses his fingers and says “oh I'm telling you everything” and he knows that the kids are not going to be happy about the fact that he's been keeping this all from them because they've done amazing things together already and he should have trusted them before now. 

This act break is them saying, “wait, Stan might be a random grifter who maybe killed our real uncle!” That's pretty heavy for any show let alone a cartoon show.

What that would mean for them if all this stuff is true is so much further than just like, “oh he lied to us about a couple things.” It's just like, “no he's straight up just some random dude that we don't even know uh and the guy that I've been pining for this whole time is dead!”  We really try to stack the deck so it's like Mabel's perspective and Dipper's perspective are both kind of racing to see who gets in front and there'll be a moment where it's like yeah you kind of buy with Mabel she feels good about about Stan and then this scene is the most you’re ever with Dipper where we discover this huge crazy curveball and this feeling that you have looking at this newspaper and looking through these fake IDs this is how Dipper feels all the time.  If you want a window about what it's like to be Dipper, this moment where a giant conspiracy reveals itself out of little pieces and seems to suggest that no one is trustworthy like that's that's where Dipper lives and this to him confirms every bit of suspicion and every bit of paranoia he's ever had and he's willing to run with it. 

I love these characters so much that, for me I was like “I need to see Stan saying goodbye to the kids at that bus. And I don't want him to be some guy who isn't Stan, who doesn't even remember the kids.” That would be really dramatic. It might make you cry more but to me it doesn't actually mean anything. Their relationship which they've built, he was willing to sacrifice his memories to save them. That's how much they meant to him but because he was willing to do that, I think he deserves to get him back.

Stan and Ford

But I think Stan's hope is, that in Stan's mind this is going to play out one way which is that; he's going to free his brother, his brother's gonna come out of that portal after 30 years. Stan's probably imagining that Ford is weak, emaciated, wrapped in a blanket, that he'll stumble forward, through a beard. through blurry eyes, he'll be “my brother, is that you?” He'll embrace Stan, he'll hug him, he'll say, “all these years I thought I was goner but you saved me! I was wrong to mock you, I was wrong to call you the stupid twin! Dad was wrong about you! You're the greatest man and let's be friends again and who are these niece and nephew?” Like that was what Stan was kind of hoping. He knows it's there's a million things that could go wrong, including potentially the destruction of this dimension, but he so desperately needs to believe that he can make up for the problems of the past. He's hoping for this but he knows that things are going to change

When I started the series, I always knew Stan had a twin but all I knew about Ford from the jump was that he's everything Stan Isn't. So Stan is a guy with a huge chip on his shoulder, he's kind of a loser at life. There's somebody who is a winner at life or at least was a winner in all these ways that Stan wasn't.

We realized that in order to bring out the maximum amount of frustration in Stan, [Ford] needed to have a bit of a heart. Like here we see him being kind to the kids, he's not he's not all bad which is what's so infuriating to Stan. The idea that he would quickly get along with the kids when he can't get any respect from them. Ford is designed for what would bring out the most amount of conflict in the family. What would be Dipper's hero, what would be Stan's rival and who's somebody that we could empathize with. I mean, it’s  hard to empathize with a character that comes out and punches one of your characters in the face, basically before he almost says anything.

You see that at this age, that all the stuff [in their room] that would cross over, that would appeal to both of them. It's not just like “there's science stuff here” and then there's “what Stan would be into.” but no, they both like all this.

There was also a version [of ToTS] where early on, they'd rigged the school water fountain. They did sort of like a caper, it was science and a scam together when they were in elementary school but we decided to save the science for the science fair stuff.

We played around with the idea that you would see them working together doing little science games or pulling little pranks. There was actually a scene that some of it was even storyboarded where they're in a treehouse together and Crampelter and his friends have tracked them down and are begging for their lunch money and Stan and Ford have used their jerkiness and geniusness to rig up like a water balloon throwing machine that knocks Crampelter in the head. I remember him saying, “oh no, my old-timey paper crown!” We were really hanging a lampshade on all these sort of Little Rascal cliches.

Ford's not a villain. You know he's getting in Stan's face and saying “I want my life back” but hopefully by the end of the episode even though you don't root for his perspective, you understand his perspective where it's like Stan ruined his science project, Stan shoved him into the portal, Stan took over his house. He’s not completely unreasonable to want it back and he's not completely unreasonable about his request. He says “okay you've got till the end of the summer” and Stan's little look there tells you everything you need to know about how he feels about the situation.

We needed pressure to be at the point where Stan and Ford recognize their lifelong rivalry and Ford does a sincere apology to Stan and almost more importantly, he acknowledges Stan's intelligence. He says “you wouldn't have fallen for Bill's nonsense.” He recognizes that his brother has a kind of intelligence he doesn't.

I always imagined that as kids, Stan and Ford were like this dynamic duo. They were getting into scrapes and like planning pranks and with Stan's creativity and Ford's genius that they were an unstoppable awesome team, before life turned them against each other. I imagine that as kids they were always swapping glasses and tricking their parents so that they could get double presents. And this is a move they did back in New Jersey constantly. We had to figure out who's gonna make a sacrifice and how and even though it's Stan who agrees to be “I'll be the one erase my mind, it's fine, it's worth it”, it's a sacrifice for both. Ford at this point is willing to get his brother back and he has to lose him again. 

Stan and Ford, when they can finally work together, do bring out the best in each other. They just have been missing it for so long.

Post-mind return, Stan and Ford get along and that scene where they both threaten the bus driver gives a hint of what would happen if their powers were combined. We've never seen them working together as adults, they would be a really formidable duo.

Pines Family

[The Blind Eye has] such a great scene between Mabel and Wendy. We don't have a lot of scenes that are just them hanging out and she can kind of be like the cool older sister. Mabel's so obsessed with boys and Wendy's just like "yeah, whatever. They're a dime a dozen."

“in the storyboard, the postcard that Soos is holding up from New Orleans actually said Vegas and at the last minute we got really worried that people were gonna see that and think that that was a clue that Stan was Soos's deadbeat father. And because like our audience, we've trained them to look for clues and to connect dots, they start connecting dots that are not connected. And I called a late retake because, and I see people be like, “wouldn't that be cool if Stan was actually Soos's father” and I hate that headcanon. Whoever's listening and you think “that's a great idea!”-- that's a terrible idea!! Because it means that Stan ran out on his kid and then came back in his life. And weirdly pretends to not be his dad. It flies against the moral of this entire episode which is like, you know this guy who is Soos’ blood relative like cast him out and didn't come back and didn't make time for him and all these people did. These people are Soos’ real family and to say “Stan would be Soos' real father more if he was genetically–”, I'm like “no, no forget that!” Like relationships are about what you do. To me friendship is thicker than water and family is something you can create so I really didn't want anyone to think that we were suggesting that because to me, it actually wasn't just the wrong idea, it was like thematically against what the show's about.” "

"[In NWHS] Every character faces their worst possible choice, which is “Mabel must choose between Dipper and Stan” and “Soos must choose between Stan and the kids,” like “guard that thing with your life. I'm not going to explain to you why.” I believe that Soos would do anything to guard Mr Pines's secrets and these are the only two characters that could possibly make him doubt Stan, these two kids that he loves so much."

"For [DD&MD], you want to set it up as being like [Ford]'s like the coolest toy that's down in the basement that Dipper really wants to play with and he is not allowed to play with him."

"The first three quarters of the series are sort of about Dipper's crush on Wendy and this final quarter is sort of about his crush on the Author. He's such a fan of this guy and he's so used to being denied that which he's a fan of and he's never found anybody who cares about his nerdy stuff. Mabel doesn't care, Stan doesn't care, Soos cares but on a different level. He's so hungry for the approval of somebody like Ford This idea that they would bond over a nerdy board game felt like sort of the way to do this big idea in a sort of grounded way that I like better than like Ford presented Dipper with the Five Trials of the Genius Boy. “I passed these when I was your age! Can you do it too?” and it's like nope he just likes the same dork game that he does."

"The arrival of Ford is creating the two sets of twins starting to pair off between the Brainiacs and the Maniacs"

"Actually I enjoyed that [Ford putting the die in a cheap plastic case] got a little bit of a reckless side because it shows you the Stan part of him. The Stan part of Ford, the little bit that likes a little bit of danger, he likes a little bit of risk. If he would show that side, it would be in when he feels at ease, with a kindred spirit. Around Dipper he’d be like “isn't this pretty cool?” He'd never be that irresponsible around Stan.  I like that Dipper is sort of a little bit of a Achilles heel for Ford as well. Ford has certain blind spots and Dipper exacerbates some of those just because he's willing to encourage, he's willing to “yes and” Ford towards whatever dumb idea he might have."

"Dipper, Mabel, Stan and Ford, they're all characters who need each other. Without Dipper, Mabel's just in a fantasy land. Without Mabel, Dipper is just sort of just spiraling into misery, spiraling into his own neurosis and not being pulled into those social situations, not growing as a person."

"You want [Stan] to be true to our various awful grandfathers, so I feel like for the most part you know that [being shitty to women] a plausible thing for Stan to do, that you only forgive because you know he's not a role model. Nobody wants to be like Stan. The kids never look up to him. The only person who looks up to Stan is Soos and Soos is enough of a comedy character that you understand the joke is “oh this guy thinks the worst way to live is good.” And then at one point you realize why. We made it clear why Soos looks up to Stan is because he gave him his job. He gave him a father basically, he’s essentially Soos’ father. And of course Stan who's had a life of just chaos and disappointment, the only person who would be a surrogate son is [Soos] but also Soos has the biggest heart in the world. So only the biggest heart in the world could forgive all of Stan's many flaws and also if Soos can love Stan, then maybe there's something in there worth loving, then maybe we can too."

"Stan, even when he's sweet, he still has to threaten to murder his niece and nephew."

"I do think the value of [Stanchurian Candidate] is that we're learning just how important it is that [Stan]’s seen. At this point, the kids have become a surrogate family. At the beginning of the show, they were just kind of a little nuisance and then he kind of tried out getting the family from them that he never got from his brother and the idea that he would lose them to his brother is his greatest nightmare and the only way he can really express that is by trying to be impressive to them and trying to be his brother's rival."

"Ford offers Dipper this apprenticeship because Ford sees Dipper as somebody who's special like himself. That Ford's great flaw is arrogance. He believes that there's special people and everyone else and that you can be held back by your siblings. That human attachments are actually weaknesses. The song and dance that he's giving Dipper right now is the exact song of dance that he gave McGucket back when they were younger which is like “sure you could continue working on your job and computers but you and me are different. We're better than everyone else, we have a path that no one else can understand. Only us can do this.” And it’s a very seductive idea for Dipper but he starts to be a little insecure here. He’s kind of “I can't believe it” and he's sort of right to be suspicious because Dipper is a smart kid but Ford's projecting. Ford loves Dipper because he sees someone who tell him yes to everything. He'll never challenge him and if Dipper had taken Ford's apprenticeship,Dipper probably would have gone the way of McGucket, turned into a kind of insane paranoid hermit with no friends, just kind of losing his mind. Like it's a seductive offer but also ultimately Dipper needs to learn not to try to grow up too fast."

"This entire time Dipper's been having this journey of self-discovery and seeing his future as this wonderful thing that he can't wait for. Mabel has been, piece by piece, seeing her idea of the summer fall apart."

"As Ford and Dipper's relationship grow stronger, Stan and Mabel also find much more sort of connection. They both feel like the sibling that's getting kind of sidelined."

"I think [amnesiac!Stan] would be hardest on Soos, second hardest on Ford but Soos would show it. Probably third hardest on Mabel, fourth hardest on Dipper just because where their hearts are. Dipper's not heartless, that's a testament to just how heartbroken those other characters are."

Series goal+ The Finale

"So our idea was; the memory gun can erase a concept as designated by the dial. It stores it. It records you and it keeps that recording and that if you watch that recording things start to come back a little bit, that it hasn't actually completely erased it from your mind. It's more sublimated somewhere where it's really really hard to reach and in the series finale, my concept of Bill is that; if he hadn't gotten in all those forms and fought Stan, Stan is the one that destroyed Bill. Were it just the mind eraser itself that he would be sublimated somewhere but he was weakened in the mindscape and destroyed in the mindscape. But Stan's memories were being sublimated and by looking at the scrapbook in the same way that McGucket's memories come back, they start to come back to the surface."

"I think part of what makes [NWHS] work also is that it has the strongest ticking clock. Yeah, I mean. it has a literal ticking clock. Also the sun is going down it's also, the town is starting to drift apart as the characters are starting to drift apart. There's just such a sense of Doomsday and even though we have like a three-part apocalypse, to me nothing feels as apocalyptic as this episode now."

"The entire purpose of [ToTS] is that Stan and his brother have had this huge rivalry that remains to this day and threatens to tear apart Dipper and Mabel and briefly does, and then Dipper and Mabel are able to find their way together, which is meant to repair Stan and his brother's past."

"Here we're teeing up the rest of the conclusion of the series which is just “whoa this is different. The status quo is shifted and is it going to shift us?” and that was the mission of this entire story was shift. Shift things such that it pits Dipper and Mabel against each other so that they can ultimately make things right and fix their uncles’ trauma in the process."

"“Let's try to set things into motion such that all of these characters who we love, who love each other are placed at maximum odds”. So Ford's entire existence in the series is basically a wrench in the relationships between Stan, Dipper and Mabel, that Stan has had a sibling who he didn't get along with and they've grown up having this horrible rift. Dipper and Mabel are these two twins who love each other but are very very different and are at this sort of volatile growing up moment where if something goes wrong could they turn out like Stan and Ford."

"[The convincing Gideon] scene works for me because it sort of represents the full completion of Dipper's Wendy Arc. Even though he's talking about Gideon and Mabel, he's really talking about himself. That idea that you can't force someone to love you but you can strive to be someone worthy of loving. It really does come down to like be the best you, you can be and the right person will see and feel that."

"It was gonna be W1, W2, W3 and then some kind of goodbye story. I remember it being something vaguely about some sort of other time travel. Bringing Blendin back because he just kind of vamoosed in the middle of this big story. There was that discussed like time traveling back to the first day when the kids arrived. The challenge was thinking of a valuable arc. So like each episode needs to have like a new problem and a new resolution and I was trying to brainstorm what's something that could feel valuable for like a final episode after the apocalypse, after Stan's mind has been erased and he's in the process of getting it back. "

"The thing I remember I wrote one out it was it's the last day of summer. Dipper and Mabel are packing uh they're planning to go home, they're feeling like nostalgic, they kind of don't want to leave. Blendin shows up and he explains that there's all these time bubbles left over, these weird anomalies because of all the time business and what Bill has done and just to watch out and be careful. Then Dipper and Mabel actually accidentally trip into one of these bubbles that are sent back to the very first episode or actually beyond the first episode, their first day in Gravity Falls um and somehow this was meant their character arc was to go from being like a little sad that they're going to leave Gravity Falls to seeing what it was like on the first day. When they were scared to be in Gravity Falls. The idea is like their first day they're like “oh Grunkle Stan, he's this weird old man and we hate living in this house and like we missed our place of comfort back home! And this is a kind of scary new adventure that we don't like.”  The kids see their own growth and realize like “the way we felt about going to Gravity Falls like we don't think we can handle it, is how we feel about leaving.” That feeling of going into a new experience means that something new and exciting is going to happen you're going to grow. There was some thought that maybe over the course of that episode, Stan would get his memory back and something that the kids had done in the past would help him in the present, get his memory back.

"What's supposed to be happening here isn't that Stan's entire memory reappears in an instant. It's supposed to be a couple days of work and we see the beginning of that process when he looks at the scrapbook and then we're kind of jumping ahead a few days. maybe a week of just intensive memory therapy with Stan before he gets there."

"When we were trying to crack the half hour episode after Weirdmageddon, it felt like we were just kind of wallowing and Stan not having his memories. It was a very depressing thing. And we didn’t get to have Stan for the last episode, which was like “it's a great it's great i think you get the emotion like in this episode. It tears you apart when you see it. You could last a little bit longer on it. But going much longer, then you just feels like well what are we doing? Why are we just kind of wallowing in our own sorrows for no good reason.”

"When we had discussed the idea of an episode beyond this episode, a fourth episode, it was basically 20 minutes of [amnesiac!Stan]. This is so intense, you might think you want it but good lord, this is enough."

"Bill singing “We’ll meet again” was something that just felt like the perfect reference because this is kind of an ending about endings in a lot of ways and we know we know Bill's going to be defeated. We know that people like Vill and have grown attached to him and for him to sing “We’ll meet again” is sort of the perfect mysterious way to say like “I might be going, I might not be going.” It’s a reference to Dr Strangelove, a movie that famously ends with nuclear apocalypse and the song “We’ll meet again” so it's for those pop culture savvy. It's already tinged with a kind of a fear and an irony and the apocalypse built in, so it's perfect on a number of levels."

"The concept of the Zodiac as existing in our current canon is this idea that the prophecy was that friends and enemies would need to come together, seemingly impossible alliances would need to be made to stand up to Bill for this prophetic moment. You know that characters like Gideon who was who used to be an enemy, characters like Pacifica, like Robbie, that we've reached the point where thanks to the kids’ kindness and growth, they are now friends with Pacifica, they've resolved Robbie's jerkiness, they've helped McGucket with his memory. They've even overcome this issue with Gideon in W1 and so it seems like friends and enemies have all been restored, leaving only one thing which is Stan and Ford have to shake hands. And their pride once again is what dooms the entire world but they get so close."

"It's clear Stan, even though he's being stubborn here and holds things up, he's ready to do it.  He clasps Ford's hand and then Ford can't help but correct his ignorant brother with something that doesn't matter at all after professing how important all this is and how important it is to put pettiness aside, he's the one who ends up being petty in the end."

"I like that Stan [during the deal] is just thinking “all right, think white, think white, think white.” He's like “think about nothing but sitting on your lazy boy.” "

"Stan and Bill had never interacted in the series up until this moment  because he had just been taken over when he was asleep. We'd seen a lot of Ford and Bill, but Stan and Bill has never happened. And Bill sort of represents all the mystery and weirdness, and Stan is the guy who just wants to have a good life and protect his family. He's the one who never invited Bill in but he's willing to take Bill out."

"If Mabel's going home with a pig, Dipper's going home with this symbol of his friendship with Wendy. And even Stan he's wearing that Mabel sweater. That's a visual symbol of; he's softened up, he's embraced family, he doesn't need to be the tough guy all the time."

[vicsy]

Daniel Ricciardo and tennis – a masterpost (of sorts).

To start things off, here is a video of Daniel playing tennis that I think about way too often, especially lately, with the recent paddle mania that took over the paddock.

A few things I could note here, apart from the fact that Daniel himself said that if it wasn't racing, he'd go pro in tennis:

old school-ish (european) one handed backhand which is actually rather solid! Daniel said many times that he is a big fan of Federer (a true goat) and Daniel's technique here is pretty much imitating Roger's smooth and satisfying backhand strokes.

it is just a couple of hits but ball placement court wise in not bad - all past the half court mark, down the line, then cross court and close to the baseline.

his movement on the court itself comes off a bit wonky in comparison to regular players but I do like how he attacks the short ball (even if he swings a bit too wide but it still works).

Some assortment of interesting facts:

Apart from his love for Roger Federer, Daniel was a big Andre Agassi fan.

In 2021 Daniel and Lando stayed up to watch British teenage tennis player Emma Raducanu (who is an avid F1 fan and her fave driver is Daniel) win the US Open, her maiden grand slam tournament. This was right before the win in Monza and McLaren 1-2.

In 2020, Daniel took inspiration for his "Equality" face mask from the four time grand slam winner Naomi Osaka and called her a "strong voice" (which she rightfully was). Lewis Hamilton also considered Naomi a great inspiration in raising awareness of several social issues.

When Daniel was a kid, he would smash his racquet if he lost (that's so real of him and i do that too):

Ricciardo is widely regarded as motorsport’s nice guy. But when does the mongrel come out? "I’m a born competitor. As a kid I was a sore loser. If it was a tennis match, I’d smash a racquet or something," he said, laughing. (source)

Once Daniel was playing with his cousin and apparent he got a little outplayed, so in retaliation Daniel hit his cousin point blank with a tennis ball (which hurts A LOT). His cousin cried and then Daniel's dad gave him "a clip across the ear". Daniel also talks about it in one of the Grill the Grid videos. (big thanks to @go-daniel for finding the article and the video to back this story up!)

Daniel is childhood friends with Marcus Stoinis (an Aussie cricketer) and they grew up together playing tennis, driving to Dunsborough south of Perth and they would play tennis together for the whole day, practically hogging the court. (via this post)

Now, to the photos!

Carlos and Daniel playing a tennis match in 2013. Daniel won 6-3 2-6 7-6. It's from Daniel's old twitter post.

Daniel and Jannik Sinner in Piatti Tennis Center in 2020. Jannik is an Italian darling and current world number 3 on the steady rise to the top (i love my carrot boy so much).

Daniel on court.

Daniel attending semifinals of Wimbledon 2021.

Daniel with Juan Martín del Potro during Miami 2023 Grand Prix. Del Potro, now retired, was a prominent tennis player from Argentina, a "gentle giant" and he is also a fan of Fernando Alonso.

Daniel with Matteo Berrettini (and Francesco Carrozzini in the middle), Italian tennis player, current world number 142, during Met Gala 2023 (the way i yelled when this photo dropped omg).

It is all I have managed to gather for now but I will update if I stumble upon something new.

[ken-dom]

∘₊✧ Ryan Gosling ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Masterlist ✧₊∘

All works are x reader unless otherwise stated - interships are highlighted by character names in blue

I don’t take requests in the traditional sense, but I’m always up for talking about my faves and sometimes it inspires a fic!

Don’t be afraid to ask if you want to see more of a certain character, it’s good for me to know and I’ll try my best!

Relevant warnings are included in the individual fic posts

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

KEN ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Ken blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

Fluff ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Comfort headcanons

∘₊✧ Lavender Ken worries he’s not good enough (includes original artwork)

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ NSFW headcanons

∘₊✧ Sex On The Beach Ken learns about the cocktail and gets curious

∘₊✧ Ken After Dark Ken has a dirty secret that you’ll only discover if you skip girls night (includes original artwork)

∘₊✧ Ken’s Glitter Ken’s stuff ✧₊∘ is not like other humans

∘₊✧ Ken’s First Orgasm Exactly what it says on the tin!

∘₊✧ Ken Can't Do Flips But He Sure Can Strip Ken wants to put on a little show for you

∘₊✧ Pretty Doll (Lars Lindstrom x Ken) Lars has a new doll

∘₊✧ It's Crazy How I Need Your Friction (Driver x Ken) Driver leaves a gift for Ken

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

DRIVER ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Driver blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Kiss Driver has been fantasising about kissing you so much that when you do, it’s overwhelming

∘₊✧ Gloves Driver keeps his gloves on for you

∘₊✧ Lips You give Driver a blowjob

∘₊✧ Short Stories: Driver Three stories shipping Driver with Julian Thompson, Luke Glanton and Lars Lindstrom

∘₊✧ Bite My Lip ‘Til You Break It solo Driver, kissing kink

∘₊✧ It's Crazy How I Need Your Friction (Driver x Ken) Driver leaves a gift for Ken

∘₊✧ Everything Looks Better When The Sun Goes Down Driver gets hard from a car chase (and breaks into your house)

∘₊✧ Might Wanna Kiss Before The End of This Song You like Driver riled up, so you push him

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

HENRY LETHAM ✧₊∘

Fluff ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Your Voice Henry thinks he recognises you and finds comfort in your kiss

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Make You Worse you encourage Henry to be what he considers his worst

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

HOLLAND MARCH ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Holland March blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ NSFW alphabet

∘₊✧ A Long Time Holland wants you, but he's scared to move on

∘₊✧ A Nice House (With Nice Carpets) You mess up the carpet in Holland’s nice house

∘₊✧ Did I Dream That? Holland had a great time last night. You were amazing, apparently.

∘₊✧ Perfect Match Holland’s first time in a long time

∘₊✧ Cumming For Days Holland wants you filled to the brim with him

∘₊✧ I Can Fix Him Holland can’t perform when he’s wasted (part of a triple threat with @hollandstrophyhusband and @webbo0 — fics linked in post)

∘₊✧ Interview With The Mermaid Holland gets curious about mermaid anatomy

∘₊✧ One More Night Holland’s horny while you’re away

∘₊✧ Did You Get It? Holland gets horny in the middle of the day. And Healy is waiting right outside

∘₊✧ Forever (Holland March x Jackson Healy) Healy is amused with how much cum Holland can produce

∘₊✧ Dare To Dream (Holland March x Jackson Healy) There’s only one bed! And oops… Holland has a wet dream

∘₊✧ A Few Things About Holland You blindfold Holland

∘₊✧ Accidental Innuendo (Holland March x Jackson Healy) Holland needs to jerk off. Right. Now.

∘₊✧ March Magic Three times Holland couldn’t get it up and one time he did

Angst ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Come Back To Me Nightmare or dream? Why not both. (part one of a two part series with @heresthestorymorningglory — fic linked in post)

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

LARS LINDSTROM ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Lars photo collection series

∘₊✧ Lars blurbs, imagines, scenarios, etc.

Fluff ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ K-I-S-S Scrabble night ends with a flustered Lars

∘₊✧ Home Lars has a question for you (includes art)

∘₊✧ Signs Of A Lifetime Lars’s first New Years Eve

∘₊✧ My Body’s A Zombie Lars sings to you (includes art)

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Thank You Lars’s first time

∘₊✧ Possession Lars needs to know you belong to him

∘₊✧ Prioritise Pleasure Lars is nervous about cumming

∘₊✧ Part 2 Lars wants to return the favour

∘₊✧ Pretty Doll (Lars Lindstrom x Ken) Lars has a new doll

∘₊✧ Training Wheels Lars is such a dirty boy, getting hard for you at a party. Only one thing for it: bathroom hand job

∘₊✧ What’s Left In Me (Lars Lindstrom x Bianca) Lars needs Bianca to know she’s his

∘₊✧ Riding Lars Lindstrom’s Thick Thighs Exactly what it says on the tin!

∘₊✧ Wake Up To Me Every Morning Lars gets a taste for you

∘₊✧ Lars and sexual desire thoughts and an imagine about Lars’s sexiness

∘₊✧ Thoughts on eating Lars’s pussy

∘₊✧ Lingered Lips you move in next door. Lars helps you settle in (and warm up)

∘₊✧ Lay With Me, I'll Lay With You (afab!Lars) Lars follows your directions when he’s desperately turned on but can’t take any more touching

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

SIERRA SIX ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Sierra Six blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

Fluff ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Alone Together you share a carnival date with Six

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Aftercare headcanons

∘₊✧ Sense drabble - Six can sense what you want

∘₊✧ Just Another Wednesday Six surprises you after a long day

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

STEVEN WINGDINGS ✧₊∘

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Keyboard Smash Steven is not pleased with the font you’ve used. Until you find one he really likes

∘₊✧ Keyboard Caress Steven makes peace with Papyrus

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

JULIAN THOMPSON ✧₊∘

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Touch Julian needs to learn he’s worthy of being touched

∘₊✧ Comfort Hurt/comfort and smut with Julian after the fight

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

OFFICER K ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ K blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Take Me Home A sleepy morning with K

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

NOAH CALHOUN ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Noah blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

SEBASTIAN WILDER ✧₊∘

Fluff ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Dreams post-canon comfort drabble

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Midnight Thoughts (Sebastian Wilder x Jacob Palmer) sexting

∘₊✧ All of Your Flaws are Aligned with This Mood of Mine Seb goes too far during an argument

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

LUKE GLANTON ✧₊∘

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ I've Got You On My Lips Luke gifts you lipstick. It's for you, and for him

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

COLT SEAVERS ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Colt blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ I’ll Do Anything You Say If You Say It With Your Hands Long hair Colt + praise + overstimulation

∘₊✧ Stay Quiet, Stay Near, Stay Close You help Colt unwind with a hot bath and a massage

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

RYLAND GRACE ✧₊∘

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ The Stars Look Very Different Today Ryland is relieved to carry out a new command from the computer

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

JACOB PALMER ✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Jacob blurbs, imagines, scenarios etc.

NSFW ────────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧ Midnight Thoughts (Sebastian Wilder x Jacob Palmer) sexting

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

[bunnybubae]

✍🏻 !FIC REC LIST! 📖

Hello there! I've been using this platform for the past 6 years, mostly to read the amazing works of super talented writers! I would like to share my all time fave with you and at the same time, show them how mutch their work is appreciated! Here is a list, I'll update it from time to time, reblogging whenever I'll add new works, please remember to support the writers with all the love they deserve by reblogging their fics, by commenting and by using their ask box to share your thoughts! 💜

🅙🅤🅝🅖🅚🅞🅞🅚

Oh My God, They Were (Quarantined) Roommates by @ot7always 💜

Summary: What do you do when you’re quarantined for months on end with Jeon Jungkook - S tier cuddler, workout robot, and thirst trap extraordinaire? Fuck him, you guess.

Warnings: *takes deep breath* soft dom!Jungkook, sub!reader, dirty talk, vibrator use, fingering, size kink, hair pulling, pussy slapping, degradation, praise, unprotected sex, overstimulation, creampie, multiple orgasms, cum-eating, oral (m&f receiving), marking, spanking, face-fucking, rough sex, morning sex, soft sex, body worship, teasing, rimming, ass-eating, anal fingering, butt plug use, anal sex, cumshot, aftercare (don’t stress, this isn’t all one scene.

—hot boy bummer. (m) by @jungkxook 💜

Summary: when jungkook offers you a proposition of just sex, no strings attached, how can you possibly say no? after all, what are best friends for?

Warnings: kind of a crack fic, sprinkle of angst, way too casual conversations mid-sex, jealous jungkook, slight himbo jungkook tbh (he’s kind of a sweet loveable idiot), he also has a big dick oops, man bun and blonde jungkook to feed my fantasies!, multiple smut scenes!!!, missionary, dry humping, oral sex (m receiving), face fucking, unprotected sex, slight degradation (mostly jungkook hating himself), brief name calling, light choking, sort of praise kink.

I Heard a Rumor. jjk by @taeshobipop 💜

Summary: One slip of a finger, and you realize you’ve liked an Insta photo of college hotshot Jeon Jungkook…from two years ago. You manage to unlike it within seconds, except it’s too late — Damn Kim Namjoon and his lightning-fast eyes. Do not tell a soul, you hiss. The man merely smirks. Next thing you know, a rumor is spread throughout campus. Y/n likes Jungkook…and now he knows.

Warnings: spitting (y/n has a spitting kink don’t ask idk what i was thinking pls it’s not that bad), protected sex, fingering, making out, a little grinding, frat party, alcohol consumption, Namjoon is very unhelpful.

It Takes Two by @junghelioseok 💜

Summary: You don't need retrospect to tell you that dating a coworker was a bad idea. Two months after your breakup, he seems to have moved on to someone new━and quite happily. If his social media is to be believe. Meanwhile, the one new thing in your life is your roommate, Jungkook, who seems nice enough. Just nice enough to coax into coming to your company's annual holiday party, and more than handsome enough to show off a little bit. Or, as it turns out, a lot.

Warnings: slow burn, one (1) awkward boner, tatted!kook, long-haired!kook, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, jk's big dick, squirting.

By Its Cover (M) by @gimmesumsuga 💜

Summary: The one where Jungkook makes a horrifically bad first impression. 

Warnings: Jungkook is actually an absolute sweetheart.  Smut; kissing, handjobs, fingering and unprotected penetrative sex. 

Blizzard (M) by @curly-bangtan 💜

Summary: When a blizzard hits your town, you and your shy awkward roommate are forced to spend time together, not being able to leave the house due to the strong snowstorm. To make matters worse, the power gets cut in the middle of his shower. Which also means no heating.

Warnings: bit of a slow burner, vanilla!Jungkook, virgin!reader, dry humping, penetrative sex, fingering, oral (m receiving), losing virginity, shy soft boy Koo with a crush and a noona kink, your heart could possibly burst from how cute he is.

Liars and Fire (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜

Summary: It’s been nearly a year since your divorce was finalized. Why, then, do you still find yourself falling into bed with your ex?

Warnings (Smut): oral (female receiving), some nipple play, fingering, delayed/withheld orgasms.

Warnings (Other): mentions of miscarriage, mentions of therapy, slight jealousy from jungkook.

L is for Lunacy (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜

Summary: After two years of being sworn enemies (and 42,000 words of shenanigans), you and Jungkook had finally begun dating. As it turned out though, dating wasn’t any easier than coming up with the perfect witty retort to wipe the smirk from his face. When you came to the first Big Decision of the relationship, it was honestly anyone’s guess as to how things would go.  

Warnings: handcuffs (male + female), oral (male + female), very explicit dirty talk, degradation, semi-public making out, spanking, condom-less sex, cum play, things get soft (except Jungkook’s dick). Seokjin randomly procures invitations to formal events; no one really knows how.

How to Get a Guy. jjk [1] - [2] by @taeshobipop 💜

Summary: Star basketball player Jeon Jungkook has a reputation as the ultimate fuckboi. He’s loved by everyone. Everyone. And you would have followed suit if he had not broken all your strict Roommate Rules™ within the first week of his stay. Jungkook, on the other hand, thinks you’re absolutely bizarre. But there’s a silver lining — Mr. Fuckboi here knows basketball captain Min Yoongi, your dreadfully clueless crush. He strikes up a deal with you: he’ll teach you the ways of flirting if you lessen your load of rules (so Jungkook can continue perusing his way through the ladies on campus). Yet the longer Jungkook spends with you, the more he realizes that maybe he doesn’t want to be the campus fuckboi anymore. The problem is, how does he prove that to you?

Warnings: protected sex, oral (f. receiving), handjob through clothes??, cumming in pants :D, slow burn, a lot of making out, titty sucking, cursing, alcohol consumption from parties, drug (weed) consumption (but not main pairing), marking with nails (not from y/n tho omg), jk sleeps around, and he’s a basketball player oof, honestly jk and y/n are just hella confused.

What's mine is mine by @avveh 💜

Summary: You caught his eye from day one. As far as Jungkook was concerned, you were always meant to be his.

Warnings: Jealous behavior, possessive streaks (a lot…), masturbation, sexting, phone sex, elements of D/S, rough sex, slight impregnating kink, breathplay, degrading names, and copious amounts of dirty talk in general, continued disregard for safe sex THAT SHOULD NOT BE COPIED.

one morning stand (m) by @rendaze 💜

Summary: in which you and jungkook have one night stands with roommates and happen to be sneaking out at the same time.

Warning: don’t be fooled by the first half being fluff lmao; rough sex, a lot of dirty talk (jk will not shut up), heavy degradation (use of ‘slut’, ‘whore’, etc.), consensual slut-shaming (reader is into it), exhibitionism, cumplay, cum swallowing, unprotected sex, breeding kink, reader gets tied up at one point.

Ember Burning (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜

Summary: The dragon riders of Duret Ghal are known across the continent; fierce warriors who take to the skies on their leashed, winged beasts. You are the last Dragon Queen of Ashya, ruler of a dying species who can transform from human to Dragon at will. When a new foe emerges which threatens both Dragon and rider alike, you find yourself forced to broker peace with your former enemy. The King of Duret Ghal, and a dragon rider himself: Jeon Jungkook.

NSFW Warnings: oral (male and female), nipple play, fingering, multiple orgasms, big cock, dirty talk, hair pulling (her to him).... tattooed, man-bun jungkook who has a big sword.

Trigger Warnings: somewhat graphic depiction of a shoulder injury.

stars behind waves | jjk (m) by @taegularities 💜

Summary: With a decade’s distance between Jungkook and you, your paths cross on the same island you deemed your second home years ago. And you realise once again – the ocean can never compare to the twinkle in his starry eyes.

Warnings: so so much yearning and pining, gentle fuckboy jk cos i’ve no control over myself, a bit of jealousy, the first kiss, arguments/fighting, unresolved issues, heartbreak, angry confessions; explicit sexual content: making out, asking for permission, dom & big dick jk, handjob in the shower, oral (m. & f. receiving), some clit slapping, some biting, squirting, jk loves her tits... and her ass even more, fingering, protected sex, soft and rough sex, body worship !!, jk is SUCHHH a goner, he comes on her ass, aftercare, praises; so many emotions; lmk if i forgot smth!

The Present by @btssmutgalore 💜

Summary: Your best friend’s boyfriend Jungkook has a special wish for his birthday—you. This maybe wouldn't be such a problem if you weren't into him since the day you'd met him.

Warnings: MFF threesome, oral (M and F receiving), same-sex kissing, unprotected sex (always wrap it, folks), a lot of dirty talk, weird relationship dynamics, extremely mature

ruin you | kth & jjk (m) | masterpost by @taegularities 💜

"it started with a gentle spark and harmless gazes; but by now, you’re caught in a wildfire that will expand until you’re burned inside and out."

Summary of the first part: His eyes hold unfathomable darkness that lures you in, captures your very soul, steals any air you are trying to draw. And you know without a doubt that you're on the path to utter and irrevocable ruination.

Warnings of the first part: explicit sexual content, dom!taehyung, switch!reader (but mostly sub), switch!jungkook, blindfolding, some bondage (reader gets tied up), wax play, lots of dirty talk, oral (f. & m. receiving), fingering, kinda praise kink, rough sex, messy sex, unprotected sex (you know it folks, be careful), like one spank?, light choking, breast play, cuckolding/voyeurism kinda (yes - jungkook is into watching), swearing, y/n probably can’t walk the next day and she loves it, threesome (obviously)

idealizations concerning real life relations | jjk (m) by @venusiangguk 💜

Summary: jungkook loves to be loved, but he doesn’t love in return.

Warnings: jk is so sweet, but also so evil lmao, oc lives in her little noggin, angsty fwb, drug and alcohol use, tattoos, multiple smut scenes that include: oral (m/f), fingering (f), light face slapping (with hand and cock??), praise, degradation, marking, dirty talk, so many creampies yum, multiple orgasms, kissing :(, cumming in pants :), probably more but i cant think of it, ok other stuff now, manipulation, infidelity, oc thinks jk is made of stars :(, jk thinks she is so pretty :(, misunderstandings, some fluff if you squint, brunette jk, blonde jk, n blue jk,  1 mentions of: howls moving castle, too many mentions of: stars, the color pink

A Holiday Snowdown (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜

Summary: The Inn on the Hill is in trouble. Or that's what your boss, Namjoon, says during the last-minute All Staff holiday meeting he calls. You need money, and you need money fast, or his parents are planning to sell the resort. When no one can think of an easy solution, Namjoon proposes his parents' idea: a weeklong social media blitz with a celebrity guest. The celebrity? None other than Jungkook Jeon himself: two-time Olympic gold medalist, world-class snowboarder and the nation's sweetheart. What's the problem? You happen to have met Jungkook Jeon before, and sincerely hoped you'd never see him again.

Rating/Warnings: 18+ for sexual content. Fingering, oral (female receiving), hand job, mutual masturbation, breast play, some face riding, dirty talk, orgasm denial, clit smacking (is there a non plural form of this?), cum shot on chest. Mentions of past death (does not occur during story). Ankle injury (non-graphic). Yoongi is an enthusiastic MC. Bam is adorable. Jungkook has both lip and eyebrow piercing

Sugarplum Elegy (M) by @bymoonchild 💜

Summary: You know no bounds nor depth with Jungkook. While your fuck buddy loves sleeping in your bed and doing laundry for you with his favourite fabric softener, you are in love with a mysterious honeyed, velvety voice on Soundcloud. All’s fine, until you find out that the voice that metaphors your heart to a sweet sugarplum melody actually belongs to the boy who has been taking up a special spot in your bed and in your heart, strumming at your heartstrings all this while.

Warnings: Explicit language, hopeless and helpless pining, constipated feelings, lots of smut, rimming, cum-eating, spitting, blowjob, fingering, classroom sex, Jungkook is emotionally constipated but wbk 

Bunny [1] - [2] - [3] by @btssmutgalore 💜

Summary: An anonymous streamer puts on a show every couple of days. When you become one of his biggest fans, your social life takes a hit—you'd rather stay glued to your laptop and stare at him than go out and meet men in real life. But, what if?

Warnings: Oral (m and f receiving), intercourse, dirty talk, unprotected sex

blackout | jjk [1] - [2] - [3] by @jjungxkook 💜

Summary: Utility bills shooting up like this should be an international crime. Luckily, Jungkook has the perfect idea(s) to save up money and make your night sinfully unforgettable.

Warnings: swearing, he’s just a bit of a fuckboy, bickering, swooning over/thirsting for jk (🤷‍♀️), a manually induced fake blackout? dunno those 2 are odd k, they play uno, a lot of spending time in the darkness, kook has no chill, teasing, consent, dirty talk, fingering, cmnf for a while, sexual tension, oral (both receiving), shower sex, choking, hair pulling, reader cries a bit, jk likes to praise, dry humping?, pussy and tits slapping rip (and some ass ig), making out🙄, manhandling, jk loves her tits and ass and plays with them (a lot), he’s sweet but cocky too, protected sex, dom + big dick kook

Love to Hate (Master List) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜

Summary: Born with a silver spoon in your mouth, you've done your best to rid yourself of the taste since you were old enough to walk. Occasionally though, your mother manages to rope you into an obligatory function—or a blind date with playboy bilionaire, Jeon Jungkook. Jungkook stands for everything you loathe about the world you left behind, but you can't deny the spark of attraction between you. Intrigued by the promise of mutual satisfaction, you agree to one night in bed... and quickly realize you're in far, far deeper than you ever intended.

Warnings of the first part: semi-public nudity, slight voyeurism, dirty talk (mention of a threesome, mention of restraints), nipple play, fingering, spanking, oral (male), face-fucking, multiple orgasms, slight possessiveness, jungkook calls y/n sweetheart and princess; seokjin is not in the fic (yet), I'm sorry about that.

Dilf Jk: Series Masterlist [The Art Of] by @venusiangguk 💜

Summary: you find a baby in your store and in turn, a dilf finds you.

Warnings of the first part: cute baby!!!, jk being a good dad, he likes to garden :(, dom jk, sub oc, age gap, handjob, coming in pants, AYOOO OC GOT A FAT COOCHIE, lowkey body worship, fat coochie supremacy, oral (m/f), safe sex, sexual tension, praise, multiple orgasms, eye contact, jk likes to watch 🥴, asking for permission, jk’s lowkey controlling i guess but it’s soft and like not toxic lol, PLAYFUL use of the word ‘daddy’, no actual daddy kink 🙄, dirty talk

Mind in the Gutter (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜

Summary: Starting over is never fun. Especially not when you decide to take the phrase fully to heart; new job, new city, new coworkers and new relationships. When you are dragged to a happy hour by your new co-worker, Taehyung, you end up sitting beside a (very) cute, (very) shy IT worker named Jungkook. Several drinks later, he mentions he is in a professional bowling league with his friends and you rather enthusiastically invite yourself along. As time passes and you begin to grow closer, you still find it impossible to read Jungkook. Working in the same company and seeing each other so often, it is only so long before one of you snaps. But who? (HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JUNGKOOK!)

Warnings: dirty talk, thigh-grinding, public make-out sesh, inappropriate bowling innuendo, Jungkook’s abs, light choking.

Over the Edge (M) by @kpopfanfictrash 💜

Summary: so, you’re dating. everything is dandy, the sex is knocking your socks off, but what happens when you get in the First Real Fight? 

Warnings: semi-public sex, mirror sex, dirty talk (slight degradation), unprotected sex, a sweaty locker room

A Thousand Reasons Why | jjk (M) by @taegularities 💜

Summary: “And if all of this experience was indeed a dream, you chose to stay just a little longer.” After leaving to work towards his dream rather than the bonds that shackle him to home, you didn’t expect to see Jungkook again years later at your best friend’s wedding. And even less, for love to rekindle at second glance.

Warnings: a whole laundry list tf: (past) minor character death, somewhat toxic parents, (mentions of) gambling, blond & then 5th muster pied piper (fuckboy) jk lol, this jimin, jealousy, alcohol consumption, unrequited love (not between jk & oc), friends fighting; explicit multiple (2) sex scenes that include: dom & big dick!jk, light hair pulling, marking, tiddie sucking/breast play, clit pinching, pussy slapping, soft & rough sex, praising, biting, some spit ig, oral (f. & m.), fingering, handjob, consent <3, cockwarming, squirting, oversensitivity, multiple orgasms, mouth fucking,… uhh, consensual drunk sex, protected & unprotected sex…. yeah

The Boy with Galaxies in his Eyes | jjk by @oddinary4bts

Summary: you had never thought the night sky could be found in someone’s eyes. That is, until you met Jeon Jungkook and his gravity pulled you in. Will he crush you with the galaxies in his eyes, or will you learn to explore his worlds and make them yours?

Warnings: oc’s ex-boyfriend died and it takes an important place in the story, swearing, fuckboy Jungkook, fuckgirl oc, a whole bunch of red flags, miscommunication (they learn how to communicate don’t worry), exes that can’t stay out of your life, alcohol, they be a little toxic but they get better, explicit content: fingering, pussy slapping, squirting, oral sex (male and female receiving), mouth fucking, dirty talking, jungkook has a slight begging kink and an exhibitionism kink (not that present in the fic), dom!jk, switch!reader, car sex, sex in a tent, hair pulling (I think), tits/nipple play, unprotected sex, a little bit of ass slapping, mentions of choking

[kosije]

my faves and their headcannoned red flags. (these aren’t legit red flags, this is a joke. also, i’m not editing this. forgive me if this is unreadable lol)

miguel

he’ll ask you what he should get, and order something entirely different

makes really corny dad jokes

stinks up every bathroom he leaves. like it’s actually vile

insist he can fix everything that breaks (somehow does????)

atsumu

has really tough feet and will run them up and down you to be funny when y’all are cuddling. it’s like sandpaper on your calf

frequently eats too fast and almost chokes sometimes

covers his mouth when he’s whispering something as if everyone can’t already hear him

has pointed to you and said “this one’s for you,” before spiking the ball directly into the net

iwaizumi

bites his nails because he doesn’t want to by nail clippers and refuses to use yours

will say “that would be a cute name for a kid,” when you guys are watching something (not very subtle)

yawns like a yelp

takes really big bites out of the food you offer

hawks

kisses his biceps after getting something heavy for you

windex bottle laugh. will colapse on the floor from laughing too hard at something

asks the chef to make his food with “extra love”

makes “i need to grow my beard” jokes all. the. time. ( green flag: he’s an eater )

gojo

will “jokingly” hump you every time you bend over

constantly watches reality tv shows solely for the drama

wears those “i <3 my gf” shirts, but it’s covered with all your most embarrassing photos

will fake arguments in public (why are you suddenly crying about me cheating in the middle of kfc????)

[darkerthanblack-666]

Ok, so the summary of today's day (it's fun, you know I'm a writer, so I can make it fun):

Before the concert+the concert

I went out. It didn't rain. I got to the city centre and it was raining like hell, but of course I didn't have an umbrella... I had my leather jacket though. Leather jackets are useful, because you can take them off and cover your hair and they don't get wet. But when I got there, it stopped raining, yay! Lucky me 😆

I got there maybe an hour before the doors? I would get an usual spot at the barrier on the side, but a girl was keeping it for her friend, so I let them have it and went to the middle. It was scary at first, because I never know what my happen and it's hard for me to stand for too long (which everyone knows, because I talk about it here a lot), but as usual the BC fandom here is very chill and most people were super nice and friendly and polite to each other, it's one of the main reasons why I love their concerts so much 💖

Most of the time I didn't see much, but Joel and Joonas got many interactions, if I find videos of those, I'll let you know! I had Joel right in front of me almost all the time, I could see his red snoot and wet upper lip, and he hit his face with the chain all the damn time... this guy 😆. Honestly, I had more fun there, in the 3rd row, than at the barrier on the side. Maybe it's because I was close to Joel, dunno 🤣. But it was probably my best BC concert so far, because I finally managed to relax and my anxiety was on a very low level. It really makes a huge difference!

Oh, and of course I lost my hairband with a big red bow. All because of Ghostkid's vocalist! I was filming Dark Side and he got near the crowd, I had no idea he was going to jump into it, because I'm small, I barely can see what's going on with everyone around being so tall. So he knocked off my hairband and I managed to catch my classes on time 😭. But I did catch him somehow, I made sure he didn't fall. Also damn, this guy is so light! Even with my health issues I feel like I could carry him myself easily. Also I'm not super sad about the hairband, if someone found it they can keep it, it's just a funny story 😂. If I lost my glasses, THEN I'd be upset. Because glasses are expensive. Btw I literally have it on video, I have proof! It's the funniest part of it 🤣

We also got another "kurwa bob" moment and Niko got a flower crown in the colors of the Polish flag! I even managed to take a quick photo (as I said, my camera is shite):

(he took it off soon after, so I was lucky to catch this moment on my camera, also hi Joel you look awful here, but so do I in most of the photos and you're still my fave edgelord 💖)

Meeting the band after the concert

I wasn't sure if it was worth to wait for them. It was still a bit rainy and the last day bus was leaving in 30min (night buses arrive only every 30min, so it's a pain in the ass). Most people have left, there weren't many of us left, maybe ~20 people waited? But I thought I don't get to see them live that often, so what the hell, I'll wait.

There were staff members and guys from the supporting bands walking around freely (everyone is always polite and we let them work in peace, it's why I love the fans here, they don't chase anyone away 💖), even Olli just walked around unbothered (I think only I noticed him at that time tbh, but I ain't a snitch hehe).

Tommi and Aleksi just went to the bus and it's understandable. Tommi is just Tommi and Aleksi was sick. All of the other guys actually stayed with us to talk and I've never had such a long interaction with them before! I feel even luckier and I'm so happy that I stayed 😍

I think everyone knows Joel is sick, so we didn't want to bug him too much. He was nice enough to let us take some photos and let us give him hugs, and he was pretty much braindead 😂. But it's understandable, he's usually braindead and he's also sick, so it's worse. I'm happy I could give him a proper hug this time, because the first time I met him I was too scared for one. The 2nd time I asked for one and patted his shoulder nervously. But this time? I just hugged him with no fear! I'm making progress here 💖

Niko is always the most friendly one, so we had a chat with him and he asked what does kurwa mean (really dude? you have no google in your phone?) and I told him it's like vittu, other people added more information, and I said he should google it, he'll find funny things. Niko, please. Just google it, dude 😂.

I also hugged him and he has a really soft coat, which other girls pointed out and he joked he's wearing nothing underneath, because he's Finnish and isn't cold (a deja vu moment, because there was exactly the same situation in Poznań before: "Niko, aren't you cold?" "No, I'm Finnish"), so I also told him it used to be much colder here in general, because we did have very cold winters before. It's always fun talking to Niko 💖

The next one was Olli, but I'm leaving Olli for the last part of the story, because it's the best. Now, I did hug Joonas and got a photo with him, but my brain is totally blank if we actually did talk to him. I think not really? Uh, dunno 😂. But it was a positive interaction as well 💖

Now, Olli. Everyone knows I just couldn't like the guy because of his crazy stans, so I was "meh" about him, but actually meeting him properly just changed my mind. He's really easy to talk to! But I really didn't think I'd manage to come up with an interesting topic, I usually have nothing to say and I'm horrible at asking questions.

My brain decided to ask him about Silent Library. It basically went like:

Me: "So I watched this show, Silent Library Suomi, and you were getting all these red cards. Was it done like that on purpose, or was it just a coincidence?

Olli (grinning): "it's called back luck"

Now, if you watched their vlogs and he had those funny moments with puns everyone loved, IT WAS LIKE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS. But I don't have it on the camera (which is ok, I did that just for myself).

He explained it really was accidental and no one was plotting against him (I did joke that Joel maybe did 😂). I think he enjoyed talking about it, because I doubt anyone would get an idea to ask him about this show (though I might be wrong).

So here you go, it's called bad luck. That's it. I got the info from the man himself 😂

But, there's more. The girl who was taking photos of us had a malfunctioning phone and accidentally took a photo of his feet and he was wearing flip flops (she did show it to him too lmao). I'll share it as soon as I get it. Also she came up with a joke that I already told her I'm going to steal:

OlliFans

(feet pic coming soon 👌)

We all laughed really loud at it (Olli wasn't there anymore, so we=us girls), so I'm releasing it into the world, because it can't be kept in containment 😂

That's it for now, more video content coming tomorrow (cause I'm tired)

[keeponquinning]

Yes, Professor — Part One of Three.

Joseph Quinn x Erotica Novelist Fem!Reader. 18+

Word Count — 4.6k

Summary — slightly based on this, but mainly. You're Joseph's secret writer girlfriend who you met amidst the start of his convention tours, things are hot and heavy between you two, though strained for the inconvenience of not living in the same city and not being official. You're forced to spend a week apart but plan to meet up with him back in London on the last day of his Con appearance, and after teasing him for his Professor type choice of outfits, well, you just couldn't resist showing up dressed as your professor's favorite student, now could you? We thought not.

Part One | Part Two | Part Three

Part One — He's in London, you? Are not. In a party for you best friend's boyfriend, you manage to get him in a call, hearing his voice, laughing, conversations wishing to see his face, but you can take what you can get.

Preview —

Warnings — Not too many, nothing really smutty happens this part, maybe some dirty talk. Established relationship, it is a big ol' RPF and my first attempt. If not your thing, that's valid AF, just don't be mean / a dick about it. I am but a drop in this massive ocean called Tumblr, just swim on past and enjoy the waves without me if it bothers, I beg. There's also cursing. 18+ so minors, PLEASE, DNI!

Notes — Oh, this came out sooner than my last one, huh?? Mainly because I decided to split this into three parts instead of one big ol' one shot. I def learned my lesson lmao I had a lot of fun writing this, dialogue and banter are my fave things and there was a lot of that in this. Kinda fell in love with these two and planning on doing an actual multi-chaptered fic with them, how they met, all that jazz, let me know if it's something you'd want. Or not, if I get just one person like "yes, please" I'll do it bc people pleasing tendencies fuel me. I've left Reader pretty vague and ambiguous but we do have her mentioning Joseph's British-ness and obviously not living in the same continent because transatlantic romance is so rom com it hurts, but, feel free to ignore that and implant your own background on her, kinda the point, right?? Alright, hope you like this! Like, Reblog and Comment, they fuel me and make my heart go pitter patter!

Taglist — @lunaapis , @munsons-mayhem28 , @inourtownofhawkins , @hopperscock ( i fucking love this url you have no idea )

"What are you wearing?"

You hear an amused chuckle on the other end of the call, along with a distinct clicking of tongue. "...don't I get a hello first or are you missing me that much?"

A snort comes out your way, totally undignified, but he'd never call you out on it. "I mean, I am, but... Shut up." He's cackling now, that laugh that makes you smile stupidly and you're glad you're on an audio call rather than face time — though you wouldn't mind seeing his stupidly pretty face. "I'm serious, what are you wearing?"

"Why are you asking?" his voice strained, amused, but strained. He must be smiling, his laughter barely dying down.

Taking a deep breath, you explain, "Because I haven't seen you in a week and from the photos I've been seeing of you all day today... I need to prepare myself for when I see you tomorrow."

"I need you to repeat that, not the nonsense about my clothes but the...seeing me tomorrow bit."

Your eyes closed, lips stretching in a smile that, in the crowded room you were in the middle of, you tried to suppress. Teeth biting your lip, eyes cautiously looking around the party you were attending but your mind being on a man across the pond as it were, you let out a soft scoff. "....I need to prepare myself for when I see you tomorrow."

"Damn fucking right you will," his voice low, almost a growl that was...unfortunate, considering your surroundings. But more important, his tone was wistful. You heard the sound of gentle squeak, taking to mean that he sat on his bed, one that you missed very much at the moment. "I can't wait for that, and you will be needing to prepare yourself once we're alone... I fucking miss you."

"Mmm, your voice notes kinda gave that impression, yeah," you chuckled, hearing his as well. "Though I enjoyed hearing them when I wake up. It's lame, but, I do miss hearing your voice first thing in the morning." You hear him take a deep breath, exhaling with a soft hum. "Among other things. Hotel beds are just a bit too cold without you."

"Mhm, feeling the same way with my own bed, darling. Have to remind myself it's just been a week, but, feels a bit longer. Can't wait to have you back, though I know, temporarily."

"I know," this time it was you that sounded wistful. You knew you shouldn't, it was a good reason you'd be away from him. The latest in your book series was out there, digitally and in a week, in physical form. The gap between that and the previous book a bit too wide for your liking, or that of your publisher and readers. It was good that you finally finished it, but in that, included a tour of the book, which meant away from him, your sort of boyfriend. "At least you'll have me for a week, well, between your filming, anyway. Enough time for your friends to get sick of me and then wish I went away to have you to themselves again and for my friends to miss the me that isn't attached to your hip."

"Hah," he scoffed, a sound of a stretch that you could only assume was him laying down on his bed. "My friends are sick of me now, keep complaining about how I miss you. Even have Wes saying if I'm this needy without you, can't imagine how you handle me by your side, so, you've somehow got their sympathy and on your side, I'm the problem now, apparently." You couldn't hold in the laugh that barked its way out of you, and you could hear the offense even from the other line. "Oi. Don't laugh, you knew I was needy from the get go, I made no attempt to hide that."

Recovering from the laugh, you have a nod, though you knew he couldn't see, "Yeah, you are a bit of a clinger." Your smile still lingering, eyes soft, "But... It's...kinda one of your more endearing qualities, so... I'll take it."

"Oh, how gracious of you, accepting that I fucking adore you to the point of being miserable enough without you and getting on my friends fucking nerves"

He always made you laugh, you didn't even know if he intended to, but you could hear him laughing alongside you, so he must have, right? "God, hearing you curse is the best, y'know? You seem like a nice, proper boy, but then you curse and it..." You shake your head, "Makes me miss you more."

You heard him scoff, a wet sound, and you could almost see him licking his lips with a smile. "I know, dead sexy and all that... Hard to resist."

A shrug of your shoulders, more to yourself, of course, "...it kinda is. Makes me wanna do things to you to make you curse more..."

He groaned, which was also a lovely noise on its own. "Don't say things like that when you're not in grabbing distance, it's not fair."

You smiled, almost wickedly, eyes catching sight of your best friend, the only reason you were away from him at the moment. "Yeah, well, at least you're alone on your bed, I'm surrounded by people in my pretty dress, not getting grabbed and kissed by you and..." you trailed off as said best friend stopped in front of you, a pointed brow arched. You cleared your throat, smile still in place, "Which is totally fine, because I'm here to support my best friend and her crazy talented boyfriend on his birthday and album release and I'm totally fine with it."

"Mhm," she let out with a nod, "What I thought. Hi, Joe, can you two say goodbye because said boyfriend is gonna start up in a few minutes and I will not have you two have phone sex while he's performing, thank you."

"Excuse me!"

"You're not excused! You're so not excused — you're not allowed."

"That's just—" you were about to say rude when you very clearly hear the cackling on the other end of your call. "Stop laughing! You're not allowed to laugh right now, that's not fair."

"I'm sorry!" he let out, his voice thin, high, and you could hear an attempt to calm the laughter — but an attempt he did not win as more laughter came rolling out, making your lips twist and wanting to laugh despite yourself. Why did his laugh have to be so infectious sometimes? "I'll stop, I swear..." he continued, making you roll your eyes, looking at the smirking face of your best friend. "....oh, god... Tell Jen I said hello."

You couldn't help but let out a soft laugh, looking over at her, "The painfully British one says hello, because manners maketh the man I'm sure."

Jen cackled as well, shaking her head, "I'll give you two like, ten minutes, tops. You're introducing them, remember?"

"Of course. Ten minutes." A mock salute given, you watch as she turned toward the stage of the intimate venue, just a smaller group of closest friends. Taking a deep breath, directing your attention to your phone, "J o e."

"Oh, no, not Joe. I'm always in trouble when I get Joe instead of your usual Joseph."

"Damn right, that was not cool, I know we're not official, but, you have to have my back. It's the most chivalrous thing to do."

He snickered, "I'm... I'm sorry, I'm sorry! But, well," you heard him release a soft laugh, then heard, "...not to point fingers but you did start the conversation asking me what I was wearing... So was that...not where this was heading...?"

You clicked your tongue off the roof of your mouth very disappointingly, kind of. "No, you perv, I just wanted to know if my sort of boyfriend is going to continue dressing up as a slutty professor so I can figure out how to handle seeing that in person."

"I—" he started, but words cut off with a snicker, and then a proper laugh. "You—Okay. Several things. Don't fucking call me your sort of boyfriend. I am your boyfriend, just.... Well. Secret boyfriend. At least for now—"

"—until your publicist deems me worthy of being known to be dating you."

"No, just... Until we're more established, is all. And I am looking forward to that, taking you to events and such. I'd love to go to the book tour with you, show off how fucking proud I am of you and this book. But... I also don't want to overshadow your accomplishment, the way it's so mad right now. But I am your boyfriend, I know you say it in a joking manner with Jen and our friends, I get it, but... And it's fine to joke about it. Really. But I need you to know it's real for me and I hope it is for you, too. It... It is, isn't it?"

You smiled softly, his words warming your heart more than they should, once again blown away by his sense of sincerity. You never really dated anyone like that before and sometimes, it honestly takes you by surprise. "... Yeah, I know. And I don't mind it, honestly. I'd end things if I did... You're my boyfriend and I'm your girlfriend and...if my joking around hurt you in any way, then I'm sorry, you know I don't mean it. Not with something like this. You...mean a lot to me in a very short amount of time and...it's kind of overwhelming sometimes."

There was a soft sigh, a pleased one, from the other end of the call. "I know. I feel the same. Was never expecting you, or anyone, not like this. And no, you didn't hurt me, not one bit. There's no worry of that. I just needed you to know, I'm in this with you."

Though you certainly didn't need to hear it, there's a lightness from within your chest at his words, a light ease in your breathing and your soft smile grew wide. You didn't need him to confirm what you already knew, but, it was lovely to hear. "Me too. I'm in this, too. Especially if you're going to be sweet like that," you end with a light chuckle, joined by his own. "Not fair on your part. But, I'll let it pass."

"My girlfriend is very gracious like that, I'm so lucky to have her."

"Don't you forget it. Okay. I'm assuming you had more to say?"

"Yes, thank you for that. Was quickly getting side tracked... I just wanted it to be known that I am severely disappointed that phone sex is off the table, that broke my heart since we've been in an almost constant state of phone tag, its ridiculous," you giggled at that, actually giggled which was rare. And he knew it, you could hear his chuckle, and though you couldn't see him, you knew he was pleased with that smug little smirk on his lips. "But, I'll survive that. Also. Slutty professor? I've no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, come on. You dress like a romantic, slutty professor to these things and you know it."

"I think someone's too far into their own erotica stories and confusing some things, I... Dress as a professional. I have to. My stylist deems it so and I just...do as I'm told."

"...Joseph. What were you wearing today, and don't lie, I've seen the pictures. I just wanna hear you say it."

"You're being absolutely ridiculous, I... My loafers, my favorite ones, trousers, erm... Blue button shirt and... Well, a cardigan..." There was a pause, and you knew he was rethinking it all. "...beige cardigan and.....my dark grey...coat—okay. Maybe... Maybe it was a bit professor-ish. You...might be on to something there..."

"Uh-huh. Dressed like a professor who cares and has long office hours for any of his students to come by to unwind..."

"Stop that," he let out with a laugh. "That should be your next book."

"Oh, who says it won't be? I'll dedicate it to you, for inspiration. I'm assuming you'd be open for me to come to you for...brainstorming? Test out scenes, just, y'know, for the sake of art and authenticity?"

"Morning, noon and night, yes, I'm all yours and your....creativity." He chuckled, softly, there was a lingering silence between the two of you, and then a groan from his end. "Just out of curiosity... Would... I dunno, say...a sweater vest, erm... Like....Oof, a grey one with a dark jacket, that um... Is that slutty professor chic, you think?"

"I fucking knew it."

"Hold on! It was... It was a thought... Are you into the slutty professor look, though?"

"Why do you think I called you in the first place? Yes, of course I'm into it. Do you know what it's like, seeing your pics all over my social media, people sending me pics of you with that cardigan and long coat and just... Do you?"

You could almost hear his smug smile as he let out an even soft chuckle. "I do, actually... You're wearing that burgundy dress aren't you?" Your brows rose, though you didn't say anything, not yet. A soft little hum buzzing into your ear through your phone. "I've been stalking your instagram the past week, so I saw the picture you posted today. It's that burgundy dress I like. The one with the bow at the hip and the... The matching choker with the jewelry that you think is almost tacky but... I like it. Gave me something to look at the other time you wore it, remember that? Was it New Years? Took you to an empty room right before countdown, lifted your skirt and—"

"S t o p, we're not doing that, not now," though you smiled, remembering the moment quite clearly, feeling your skin flush especially as he laughed then. He had such a nice, deep, warm laugh sometimes. "...okay, so, yes, I'm wearing that dress... It's not the same, though, like, aside from that choker you love so much, it's pretty tame in comparison..."

"Mm, not for me. I love that color on you. I love anything on you if it means I can take it off of you. And—a cardigan's tame. A long coat is tame."

"The hell a long coat is tame, that's... Anyway, you wear the slutty professor really well and it's not fair. Especially if you're going to to do tomorrow. After being away from you a week... That's cruel, baby. I won't even be able to touch you until the con's over." You heard him hum, probably thinking the very same. A thought comes, making you chuckle suddenly, "I should retaliate."

"...oh god," he let out, clearly recognizing when a wicked thought comes to mind. "Pray tell, how?"

"Why... Professor..."

"....Oh, fuck."

"Yup. By dressing up as one of your favorite students, of course."

"....jesus fucking christ." You heard a small groan, "God, you would, wouldn't you? I don't know if I could take that. It's been a week, body going in withdrawal without you and the sight of you with knee high socks..."

"Hmm. Telling that the knee high is the first thing you go to. Noted."

He chuckled, "Yes, well... The thought of you in knee highs is rather... I wouldn't take them off. Not the entire time."

Your smile widened, biting your bottom lip. "Yeah? Mmm. Well, good, because I'd definitely wear your favorite colors, just for you, Professor."

"Fuck off," he said softly, though, and when you laughed, you heard him let out a breath. "Shit. I can't shake the image, now. My favorite student, dressed so pretty for me. Looking nice and soft...with uh..." He exhaled, "Burgundy knee highs, snug and soft..."

You kept a careful eye around you, trying so hard to suppress your smile. But the sound of his voice was so...alluring, finding yourself squeezing your thighs a little bit. "Keeping up with the color theme, I see..."

"It is my favorite color at the moment, especially on you."

You hummed, "Okay. Question, knee highs or thigh highs?"

"No," his voice instant, "Gotta be the knee highs. I'd want... I'd want your thighs absolutely bare. For my fingers to run and roam over the skin... And...then, y'know... I wouldn't be able to resist to kiss you there as well. Gentle ones of course, but, being away from you this time...wouldn't be long until I start biting..."

A breathless laugh escapes you, now not even caring if anyone looked or listened in on you. It had been a while since you talked to him in real time, without having to push play, it was too good to cut away from. "For someone that says they can't write for the life of them, you're not doing too bad, Professor. You might give a run for my money if you ever decide to go into the erotica business."

"Mmm, tempting, but no. I'll leave that to you. It'd just be a novel of me fucking you and I'd rather have the real thing. But... Was I good enough to get you wet for me, darling?"

It shouldn't make you blush, you built your whole career in literary dirty talk and seducing your readers with your words... But when Joseph did it, his words and voice always struck you deep. Much deeper than any other partner had, which was slightly scary and mainly thrilling. You felt the heat creeping up your neck, a soft giggle being awarded to him. "....you know you are." You heard a pleased sigh from him, taking in a deep breath as you try to calm yourself. That no, sneaking off wasn't an option, that the growing ache between your legs would have to wait, even if you wouldn't have him talk you through it, guide you toward climax in the only way he could. But. "You got me wet and feeling it now every time I walk around in my pretty burgundy dress in a room filled with people."

"Well... I'm alone in my lonely room with a very bothersome hard on and... Probably feel lonelier still when we say our goodbyes and I'll only have my hand and thoughts of you in your pretty burgundy dress, wet, wishing I can feel just how wet you are."

You let out a breath, closing your eyes a moment. "...and I'd wish it was my hand, my mouth, on that...bothersome hard cock," you heard him groan, making your heart flutter, as well as your cunt. "Like I've been fantasizing this past week."

He took a deep breath, you could hear the exhale produce static on your end, a soft hum. "Same here, love. Suppose we'll be doing the same thing tonight..."

With a dejected sigh, you have an affirming hum, "Our ten minutes are about done. Otherwise I'd sneak to a room somewhere and..." You chuckled, "Tell you in excruciating detail the things I'd do to you to make you curse." His laugh comes out at that, making your smile spread further on your face. "But. I am due on stage to introduce my best friend's boyfriend and his band, so... She'd kill me if I missed that, and then would go and kill you, and no one wants that."

"No, no, we do not. That's fine. More to release when I see you tomorrow. Probably keep you to myself for the rest of the week, fair warning, darling."

"Yes, Professor. I'm very okay with that."

The way he groaned at that made your heart flutter again, as well between your legs. You did miss him, terribly, your fingers and toys did little to satisfy you, not without his warmth, his kiss, the moans you'd swallow and hunger for more. "...keep that up and I won't want you to call me anything else."

"Is it bad I kinda like it? P r o f e s s o r?"

He gave a helpless laugh, "Shit, it is. It's very bad of you. Naughty, even. Wicked. My poor coc—"

"Tomorrow, only until tomorrow. And then I'll make it up to you, in any way you want me to. I'll call you professor if you want me to."

"I knew there was a reason you're my favorite student..." You smiled and you could feel he was smiling too. "Okay. I'm going to give you back to your best friend, again. Thank her for me, for letting me have you to myself for this long."

"I will, she'll expecting nothing less. Think of me?"

He chuckled, and you could picture him shaking his head. "When am I not? Especially right now, left to my own devices... Until I have you to myself again." You heard him take a sharp intake of breath, "Have fun, yeah? I love you."

You felt like a teenager again, at the sound of those three words, said recently, right before you left. A slip of the tongue, but meant with sincerity from you both. "I love you, too. I'll see you... Bye."

"Bye, darling. I can't wait."

There was a heaviness that weighed on you as you ended the call, knowing it had to be you, otherwise you wouldn't end it at all. The warmth of his voice lingered, the image of his face imprinted on your brain, curling your fingers around your phone. A thought hitting you like lightning, going to messages and tapping quickly.

Send me a voice note. I wanna hear you.

He liked it.

Your smile widening as you turned around, dumping your phone into your purse and with your heels, made it toward the small stage where the band were setting up. Hands went to Jen's shoulders, hugging her from behind. "I'm all yours, now. He said thank you for letting him have me for the call."

She scoffed with a roll of her eyes, "Gross, you guys are gross."

"Shut up, we're cute." Jen seeming unconvinced. "Whatever, I'm happy."

Your best friend gave a shrug, "Then that's okay." You pulled away and stood beside her, and she took a breath. "He does seem to make you happy and... I don't hate that. Just the whole...secret relationship thing gives me pause." Crossing her arms, she looked to you, raising her brow. "Be honest.... You really okay with it? Because if you are, I'll back off and be one hundred percent for you guys. Because he is nice and seems crazy about you and I haven't seen you this happy in a while... I just don't want you hurt, y'know? I'm not being a bitch—"

"You're never a bitch—" you interjected, pausing as you two looked at each other, and you smirked. "Okay, well, yeah, you are, but for good reasons. A boss bitch, through and through." You paused a bit, giving a shrug of your shoulders. "I dunno. We talked about it... I kinda get it, he kinda blew up overnight and doing...so many things and I... I can't even imagine. I got booktok and like... Well, this book tour, but, obviously nothing on his level. He seems more concerned about if it came out, he'd overshadow my book and the press for it." Which you did appreciate, you worked hard, but part of the reason you got the book done as fast as you did was his encouragement. Being the first to read your pages, his excitement over the story you crafted holding a huge part. "It would have been nice to dedicate the book to him, but, since we aren't....out, didn't really feel right."

"Mmhm..."

"But. I don't know, at first it was kind of fun, sneaking around, dodging photographers, you know. Secret affair type of thing except not being horrible with spouses to cheat on, that kind of thing? And we were casual at first, seeing other people, until... We weren't and...not casual anymore. I mean, it's kind of still fun but also...not."

Taking a deep breath, she sighed. "And how long until it's not kind of fun for you?"

Looking over at her, you frowned, hating that she had a point. "I don't know. I'm not there yet... And I'm hoping it doesn't come to that because... I'm really fucking happy with him." Raising your brow, you give her a reassuring smile. "I'll be careful. And if I'm not, you can kick my ass about it."

"Deal," she agreed to, seeming a little lighter about the situation. "So, is he still going to dress all Mr. Darcy as a Professor when you see him?"

"I swear, he's a walking Jane Austen leading man, like it's just straight up Professor without him even trying." She laughed, you joining in. "It's gotta be a British thing, it has to." Laughing a bit harder, "I teased him with an idea, though, dressing up like a student."

"Oh? Oh, that'd be perfect. Are you meeting him after that con or...?"

A sly smile comes across your face, then, looking at her with a slight chuckle. "Mmm... Don't laugh, but... I actually planned on surprising him at the con?" Your smile widened as she gasped, looking at you agape. "I bought a photo and autograph with him. I knew there'd be no chance on the day of and I thought it'd be cute, you know? He doesn't know."

"Oh, God, I hate to say it, but that's fucking adorable! And kinda genius." Her eyes widened, "You know, though... I mean... The set up's too perfect, you have to dress all slutty student."

"Hey, slutty is for Halloween, I'd be dressed as his favorite student, with knee highs, he seemed very into that."

If her eyes could widen even further, Jen's would, letting out a bark of a laugh. "Oh my god, knee—no, no," shaking her head. "You are doing this. You are gonna do this. Listen...we're gonna make this happen."

"We don't have time, I'm getting the red eye, remember? And by the time this is over—"

But she was determined, shaking her head, "Nope, look. You're gonna introduce the band, because you are my amazing writer friend and words are your thing. We'll stay for a few songs, and then I'm going to take you shopping, okay? I'm making this happen, I'm gonna make this happen for you."

"I thought he gave you pause and you're gonna work this hard to make a fantasy come true for him?"

She wagged her finger from side to side, "Oh, no, no. Not for him, for you. Look, he seems great and he probably is, and maybe there will be a time where he's like a brother to me, but right now? I believe you when you say he makes you happy and that you're happy with him, I see it, so, I'm doing this for you. Because you are my best friend and that's love, bitch."

"I love you. Like... You'll always be my first love, in a totally platonic kind of way. Only because of the fact that you're annoyingly straight."

Jen sighed, "I know, it's a pain, but, we'll always have each other's backs and our hearts, before anyone else." Her gaze going toward the stage, her musician boyfriend giving her a nod, releasing a soft smile. "We didn't do so bad, though. You're up. Make me proud of my boyfriend, okay?"

"Oh, yeah, how do you want me to go about it? Soft and emotional, very serious or...roast him but from the heart?" You both looked at each other for a moment, the answer quite clear.

"Roast him."

for your consideration....

[campbyler]

*i wrote all this at approximately 4am, so bear with me for how deranged i sound lol*

oh. my. GOD. AAAAAAAAA!!!! this chapter like holy fuck i was giggling and kicking my feet after reading the first three paragraphs. like omg my GOD THEY ARE SO ALFJDKAL!

i would just like it to be known that i have driven a standard vehicle one (1) time in my life and my experience was so similar to will’s with how i almost burst out crying the first time i stalled as well LOL! i can’t really say much about all the technical car stuff since its been a few years since i’ve driven a manual car and i don’t know shit about cars, but from what i remember my dad said basically the same things to me that mike said to will when teaching him so i would say it’s pretty spot on!

HOLY SHIT THEY ARE SO KING IF MY HEART CODED OMG!! “That’s it, baby!” like holy fuck “now you try on calling me baby like trying on clothes” first the thrift store date and then mike calling will baby!!??!!! so king of my heart of them. the mall date and the restaurant have changed my life. if i talk about it in too much detail i fear i might explode. so all ill say is OH MY GOD THEY ARE SO AAHADJKALSD LIKE “you should draw me” OMG I WAS SCREAMING JNTO MY PILLOW!!! “i already draw you all the time” KILLED ME! I DIED FOR A SECOND THERE ! “smoking hot… accurate portrait” i might as well have been six feet under at that point. “I’ll get jealous of her” holy shit michael wheeler. holy shit. i just have to continue before i really do explode. MIDDLE SCHOOL SWEETHEARTS!!! OH MY GOD I ALMOST DIED AGAIN! THE PHOTO BOOTH!!!!! i love a good photo booth moment and this one did NOT disappoint. THE HEART FRAME OMG!!!

will just absolutely ignoring max because she has them all figured out is just *mwah* but holy shit that car ride. will finally stopped ignoring that thing in the back of his mind and figured his shit out. like holy fuck my pillow probably hates me for how much silent screaming i’ve been doing through the chapter. will broke the no kissing in the mustang rule. HOLY SHIT HE BROKE HIS OWN RULE!!

this chapter is one of my faves!! can’t wait to see how mike is doing in the next chapter i bet he’s an absolute mess

AMAZING JOB AS ALWAYS!!! TAKE CARE!!!

<3<3<3

see you in the next chapter!

AHHH WE LOVE A 4AM COMMENT (EVEN IF YOU ARE INSANE FOR STAYING UP SO LATE TO READ)!! i am So So glad that you enjoyed!! i read this entire thing while nodding and also reaching thru the screen to pay your head gently 💗 tysm for reading and commenting and we hope you continue to enjoy the future chapters!!!

[thepalmofyourfreezinghand]

Loved Joe's photo dumb, both the nature and he look so peaceful. I love how much he likes being in the nature, walking in fields or among trees and the beautiful views he shares. That's so European of him and always puts a big smile on my face

Yes! There’s a lot I don’t like about Italy, but one of my fave things about living here is how “readily available” nature is. Actually, in Italy unfortunately we don’t have that many good city parks (the main park in The Hague, for example, is absolutely out of this world - you walk in it and you forget you’re in the middle of one of the most important European cities, you can’t even see the buildings or hear any city noise). BUT there are mountains and open fields and woods and beaches and lakes all along the peninsula, and it’s so easy to spend time in the nature, even if you don’t have that many resources or time.

And honestly it varies from person to person but for me, personally, nature just takes a lot of the stress away from me. Even the idea of living somewhere that has no green spaces nearby is claustrophobic haha.

[biolizardboils]

Underpanniversary mont September is almost over, so here’s one last headcanon dump for the road

General

The entire book series takes place in a single school year. The following is my vain attempt at cramming everything into that timeframe in a way that makes sense

The football game in Book 1 was the kickoff and happened in early August. The 4-to-6 weeks before the Ring arrived was really just 4 weeks, minimizing the Boys' slave labor and placing Captain's first day on duty in early September (not exactly the 1st but close enough)

Book 6 canonically happens during the cold and flu season (so late autumn), making it the halfway point of the school year and the series. (I just realized that it’s never shown snowing in modern-day Piqua? Maybe it only happened while the Boys were on winter break)

In Book 11, Krupp mentions there’s 7 weeks of school left. Summer break usually starts in mid-to-late May; subtracting 7 weeks from that places Book 11 in early-to-mid April

Book 12 happens in May. The Rid-O-Kid incident and sudden lack of gym teacher forced the school to close for damage control, then hold a half-day to do the yay-you’re-moving-up-a-grade stuff. (And yes, this means Captain Underpants Pizza Party didn’t happen and is merely a wistful fantasy 😔)

Also said school year is 1997-1998 (except for when I bring up any media that came out after that) because this is my post and I make the anachronisms

The Boys

Harold raises Sea Monkeys as snacks for his and George's pets

Speaking of their pets, they are NOT to be put in the same room together. George's are cats, Harold's are fish. Can I make it any more obvious

George had to stay home sick for a whole week once. when he finally came back to school, he walked in with this blasting on this boombox

George's fave computer game is Star Wars: Behind the Magic, Harold's is Insaniquarium (first the browser version, then Deluxe way later), and they both love Backyard Baseball

George's fave Disney film is A Goofy Movie. Harold didn’t have a favorite until middle school when Treasure Planet came out

The boys took Captain to see Hercules in theaters. He declared it the greatest movie of all time, so they bought it on VHS and played it in the treehouse whenever he asked. The boys kept it long after 4th grade and watched it whenever they missed him

They used to think boy bands were weird and girls were weird for liking them... until Heidi got into the Backstreet Boys. Harold caught The Fever from hearing her play their songs in the house, and George caught it from him. Their favorite song is Answer To Our Life

Harold would later joke that him catching The Fever should’ve been his wake-up call lol

The Old!Boys

In college they held a dorm party and made Jungle Juice in a (fully sanitized!!!) toilet so they could flush away the evidence after. And also just for laffs

Their kids go to Stubinville Elementary. It’s farther away and they have to take a bus, but it’s got generally better teachers than Jerome Horwitz. Go Stinkbugs

They wrote a letter to Krupp about what they did to him in 4th grade, but never sent it

Other

The Boys' parents didnt realize their families had blended together for years. It finally hit them when they asked Grandma and Grandpa to synchronize their visits. They were like "....Huh." and then went right back to setting the table

Other things both families do together: bills, carpooling, cooking, movie nights, fishing, picnics, holiday card photos at the mall

The Beards have a record player and a vinyl collection of every funk and R&B hit from 1968 to 1989. They always have one playing as background noise in the mornings and evenings. (The Hutchins like to play MTV instead)

Heidi goes to a preschool halfway across town. Robbie Hoskins (the little boy whose mom never believes him) goes there too

The Boys plan on being Heidi’s bodyguards when she starts kindergarten at Jerome Horwitz. No one’s gonna give her trouble, student or teacher, if they can help it

She can’t get in the Treehouse—not cus the Boys won’t let her, but cus she’s too small to safely climb the ladder 😔 Some day she'll get in there and eat all the hidden junk food, but not yet

I diagnose Melvin with EXTREME Gifted Kid Burnout post-canon lmao. He ends up going to the same community college as the Boys and they finally bury the hatchet there

Switching to paragraphs for this last one:

Long ago, when Krupp first started out as a principal, him and all the staff fell victim to an impossibly elaborate prank. He was excited to write his first detention slip and grilled the whole student body to find the culprit. 

After threatening to hold them hostage past the last bell, a dirty blonde boy in 2nd grade came up to him and claimed responsibility. Krupp locked him in the detention room and looked for his parents' number in the school directory, but couldn't find anything under his last name. 

Just then, he heard the kid make this noise. He stormed back to the detention room and opened it to yell at him... but the kid had vanished. The only sign he’d been there was his slip on the floor.

Krupp framed it in his office to preserve a milestone in his career, and vowed to crush that kid's spirit the next day.

But he never appeared at the school again.

[fanfictiongreenirises]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💗

this is so cute!!! thanks for the ask 💜💜💜 my faves change with every fic i write but at this moment it's probably these:

Point of No Return

Wei Ying distantly registers the sound it makes, too busy gaping at the person on the other side. His body is turned a little as if to head back down the steps, but Wei Ying would know that profile anywhere, even if it’s been years since he’s seen it in person. “Holy shit,” he says, trying his hardest to stop himself from gaping, mouth open and all. “A’Cheng?” Jiang Cheng shows up at Wei Ying's door out of the blue after years of living overseas with his mother, with nothing on him but presents for his nephews and siblings, asking if he can stay. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that something isn't right.

sometimes you write 26k worth of self indulgence (blorbo getting whumped, blorbo getting hugged) and this is absolutely that for me

please do not stand or wait in this area

Frank had thought that after getting Joe back, everything would be okay again. But recovery takes longer than he'd like for it, even if it feels like everyone else has moved on.

my hardy boys fic of a fic!! it turns out that writing grief and recovery is really fun :D

yours for the weekend

"Been meaning to ask," Jason said. "You and Kory… are you guys still… y’know. Going strong?” Dick almost choked on his mouthful right then and there. No, he wanted to tell him. We broke up months after you died. But a million memories swept through his head. Jason being utterly starstruck by Kory the first time he had met her, the million and one questions Jason had to ask Kory, taking photos of the two of them as Kory gave Jay a piggyback ride… the way that Jason, at one point, had rather memorably said, man, you guys are so perfect together. If you ever break up, that’ll be it, I’ll just stop believing in true love. “Yeah, no, we’re going good,” Dick said, lying through his teeth. “Long distance, y’know?”

this was supposed to a romcom fic but it turned into Such a fix it and has some of my favourite conversations that i've written. also my friend made art for it and they're not online anymore so it makes me happy to scroll thru and see the cute little dickkory figures they made for me

streaks

Months after Dick's return from Spyral, Tim has revelations that were a long time coming. In which the author uses Snapchat streaks for Bat purposes, there are tea parties, and more tears appear than expected.

9k of self indulgent canon fix it but then i project about culture for a solid chunk of the middle

autumn arrives

A mission in space gone wrong leads to Dick arriving at the Manor, five months pregnant.

we've come a full circle bc this one is also full of self indulgent blorbo gets whumped, blorbo gets (some) hugs <3

[faceglitchsworld]

It's the 13th of March here, which means one thing... it's Beomgyu's birthday! 🥳

Here's the collage I made for him ☺️

Very, very proud for this, capturing every side of him was very simple this time. As always the selcas have two of my weak point, glasses and hairbands, even tho I fought with the photos this time, zooming wise. I'm very sorry, but believe me, Beomgyu is wearing an hairband in the right middle.

Outfit wise, I decided to put in the middle my favourite TxT era + the song which made me fall in love with them. Probably I'll do this for the other members too maybe 🤔

Time for the little letter now.

Before becoming a full time OT5 stan, Beomgyu was my first and only ultimate bias at the time. There were many reasons for this.

First and foremost I think that the main reason why I fell in love with him was his fun personality. I clearly remember the first time I tried to see an interview TxT made for a magazine (must admit, I checked those because of the subtitles 😅) and how Beomgyu immediately stood out during it. And from that video I became literally obsessed with how he acted towards the members especially towards Yeonjun. My gosh, you don't have any idea how much I laughed while watching compilations of Beomgyu and Yeonjun being literally Tom and Jerry every second. And not let me start talking about every time I tried to watch a To Do Episode and I needed to stop for a second because of Beomgyu. This boy was meant to make me laugh.

I also want to talk about another wonderful thing Beomgyu did when I started my entire K-pop experience. If you've followed me for a while probably you know that I go completely crazy when two groups interacts together or even make collab (cough*theWeUsfamily*cough *theBTXTcrumbs*cough). Sometimes I even think about how collabs between my faves might work. The reason why I'm like this is thanks to Beomgyu. It's 2021, I finally added Stray Kids into my stan list with TxT and Monsta X. I'm minding my own business when I receive a notification about a TxT update. I click on it and I discover that Beomgyu made a selfie with I.N. I've been stunned for five minutes. And then my heart was overwhelmed of joy. It was the first time where I saw two of my faves interact to each other. Ok, ok, I admit it, I didn't know at the time that they were friends already. My bad. But I will never forget how I was relieved at the time. Seeing what seemed to me a genuine friendship into this competitive industry made me really happy. It was a ray of light for me, really.

And now, I think it's time to talk about something that is connected to him in a very special way: Maze in the Mirror. Ok, little story time. I was doing a little TxT marathon through their discography, I reached The dream chapter: Eternity and I started to listen to it. Everything was pretty normal until Maze in the Mirror started. I don't know what happened to me but I felt something different. I noticed that all the members were shining differently. It was like that song was more...personal to them. I stopped listening to the album and I searched the translated lyrics, which is something I rarely do, and I searched the credits. And once again I thanked my instinct since I was right. This was a song where they worked on.

But what caught me off guard was noticing that Beomgyu helped in the production too. I think it was that moment where I understood him a little better. I've understood that the same member who made me laugh and brighted my days was the same one who decided to hide his insecurities and fears with a smile. And I've understood that the minimal melody I loved so much in Maze in the Mirror was his personal way to communicate with us those insecurities. Yup, I think you've might understood it now, the reason why I love this song so much is thank to him and I'll be always be grateful for that.

My dear Beomgyu, thank you for being the kind friend who always looks up to the other members every time. Thank you for making my days a little more better with your effortless comedy. Thank you for just being you. Probably you don't feel the same insecurities you had while writing Maze in the Mirror anymore but, if there will be a moment, any moment, where you'll think that your efforts aren't enough remember that you have four amazing friends who'll always be with you. And remember that MOAs appreciate you in the way you are, always.

Hope you'll spent a great and funny day with the members and that you'll receive amazing gifts from them and your family too.

Happy birthday, teddy bear 🧸

[vertiny]

top three eras styling 💖

bec ilysm 🫶 okay so styling is so so fun in some eras so imma... not cheat, but ! break it up into two sections, hope you don't mind ! (one of these might just be purely bc of a hair colour but technically hair is a part of the stylings 👀 (i could do a whole top for hairstyles but that's not what we're here for) + these are gonna be a mix of mv stylings, stage stylings, etc.)

sorry this took so long getting out, i thnk i put Too Much thought into it KSJDGH

under the cut bc pictures are involved and i feel like i talked too much 🥹

SECTION ONE: BY MEMBER

1. yongseung - series ‘o’ [round 3 : whole]. i swear it’s not JUST his hair that puts him here but like . THIS HAIR COLOUR !!!!! wine red / burgundy yongs so dear to my heart, but other than that, the outfit choices made for him were such good ones. we always love a suit look, and there's smth about the copper(?) silk shirt that sits lovely against him, with a pop of a different pattern thanks to the collar, and then the silk shirts in general were just good choices, sarah stickered and seal of approval-ed, the whole works dskjgh, and then ig i just have a thing for yongs being in the orange / brown colour-wheel (especially with this hair) bc it just Suits Him, idk what else to say

2. hwanwoong - pygmalion. a mutual of mine got a real-time view into me, who was a singular leedo bias with a fondness for hwanwoong, who had also already seen the solo concept pics, completely disregard leedo in the group concept pics and zoomed right into hwanwoong with a caption of "HELLOOOO SAILOR 🤩🥰" so he was welcomed into the bias line officially... i think that speaks for itself SKDJGH and if it doesn't, look at the photos. they speak for themselves 🤭 (we also got yongseung & hwanwoong interactions again this era so many pluses in my book ! debut besties (oneus + vrvr debuted same day !) near and dear to me<3)

3. seonghwa - fever: epilogue. look at the material, need i say more? DKDKS no but fr, the pink hair is def a top reason this era of styling lives on in my head. we also got pink-haired vampire!seonghwa so… that’s worth all the hype 😌 also probs has smth to do with pink being my fave colour when i was younger, but either way, it's the colouring of everything together that really makes this era a fave. like, okay, hwa's got pink hair, but they didn't make it a hot pink that ran many possibilities of clashing with everything, and it's not a washed-out distant breath of the colour pink but a nice middle ground, and like i said before, look at the material. the brightness of the pink works with the dark blue and grey jacket, the pink goes up against the blue / green (teal?) of the overcoat and only serves to (imo) heighten the pop the coat brings - the clothes under the coat and the background are all monotone and yet, despite the pink, your eyes are instantly drawn to the coat. the third photo . well. that hwa might just live rent free in my head so i'm incredibly biased on it, and imma sound like a broken record but his pink hair is tied in with the pops of pink on the jacket, and there's spots of different patterns that draw your eye, but none that overwhelm you. and as for the fourth pic... pink (cat) hwa is so beloved to me and that's all i gotta say

(honourable mentions: seonghwa - halazia / seonghwa - crazy form / seonghwa - wonderland (bc sword<3) / yeosang - bouncy (esp this look & special mentions to these two hair stylings) / yeonho - undercover (esp this look) / gyehyeon - undercover (specifically 220508 & 220503) / wooyoung - bouncy (for this hair accessory & this styling alone lol idk i like it a lot) / seonghwa - deja vu / yongseung - crazy like that - and imma stop here bc i could apparently keep adding more :starcry:)

-

SECTION TWO: BY GROUP

1. verivery - tag tag tag. look, you know me, you know what my favourite colour is (red) lol BUT EVEN THEN there’s smth about the styling for this era that just hits so well. idk, it’s a mix of casual, of flowy, of literally “just some dudes” kinda looks that just work so well. i looooove the mix of fabrics and patterns and how cohesive they are while all being strong outfits all in their own. this set of stage outfits (pictured below) are, imo, great, like . giving dongheon (1) and yeonho (5) “red heavy” fits, giving hoyoung (2) and yongseung (6) black jackets to break up the monotonous of the singular colour, having gyehyeon (4) in a complete red look BUT using a deeper red and blue / black plaid overshirt to make him stand out AND THEN putting minchan (3) and kangmin (7) in black and white fits with a red accent belt? (even tho you can't really see the belt on minchan lol) SO GOOD 🤩 and even after all that, they've all got bits of silver jewelry that ties them all together too

2. p1harmony - killin' it. okay, so we aren't even in this era YET!! but like . the stuff i've seen... yeah, she deserves it. keeho (1) looks so good i'm 😭, theo (2) looks dark and edgy, jiung (3) looks - in the best way - like he's about to start a fight (and win) idk how to explain it but its so good, intak (4) i want his shirt rn plsnthx it looks like someone grabbed the stars and made it into a shirt 🤩, soul (5) is a son and batshit insane (affectionate) and i'm like so ?!?!? about his hair this era !! i don't think i could do it but it's so sick and suits him so well and jongseob (6) i lowkey expected a nosebleed in the styling? SDJKGH I KNOW THAT SOUNDS STUPID but i feel like it'd fit for his styling alone? not in the overall styling but if it was just him? piwon generally always has solid stylings !

3. victon - voice: the future is now. the era has 3 stylings but these two are so 🫶 !!!! to me lol (it's also my first victon era so it's v dear to me) the left side's styling gives off aristocratic vampires and i didn't know i needed this kind of styling in my life until i laid eyes on it ! the shirts all look like they're velvet and soft so that's always a plus in my books. and then the right side's styling !! i'd describe it as "casual royal" lmao it's the mix of them all in a simple pant, and then the jackets / coats are all bedazzled (and all different styles of bedazzlements !!!) making them the true statement pieces, and we both know that means they're sparkly and . well . gimme, i want them 🤲 SKDKD

(honourable mentions: verivery - get away / verivery - trigger / ateez - bouncy / ateez - crazy form / p1harmony - harmony: all in / oneus - pygmalion / oneus - baila conmigo / verivery - tap tap / verivery - undercover)

[talvenhenki]

how about the last 500 words of your lastest one on ao3 for the dvd commentary meme? :))

Okay so 500 words turned out to be A Lot so here you go (From The Song of Flowers: A 07-Ghost Story):

--

Shaking his head, Labrador moved a little. He reached out to his nightstand to grab something. A leather-bound journal. It was thick, and it looked like over half of it had been used up already. Castor had never seen that journal before. Neither Labrador nor Frau used any journals that looked like this, although Labrador did like to write things down occasionally. But he used separate slips of paper. Not a journal.

“She ran away after telling me that her brother is a Warsfeil”, Labrador explained, “and she forgot her journal. I took it, but…I don’t think we should read it. Whatever she’s written here must have been painful. She told me that the flower she was having tasted sweet.”

Ah. Labrador’s teas and plants had healing properties, and in particular, the tea flowers could bare someone’s soul entirely. Perhaps Kanon was just another lost lamb after all.

“Well”, said Frau, “I, for one, think it’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission.”

Frau grabbed the journal and was about to open it, but Castor reacted faster. He snatched the journal and pushed Frau away with his foot, all while still holding Labrador from behind. In the commotion, a photo slipped out from between the pages and landed on Labrador’s lap. He picked it up to study it better.

“Dammit”, Frau muttered, “she really was in the army.”

In the photo, three members of the Barsburg military were smiling at the camera. In the middle was Kanon. Her long lavender-coloured hair was braided around her head, only leaving her wavy bangs down. To her left, there was a smaller person with pink hair and an eyepatch. The person was hugging Kanon from the side, while Kanon had one arm around their shoulders. To Kanon’s right was a young blond man, perhaps a year or two younger than her. His eyes were light brown and he had one arm around Kanon. They looked so happy and carefree, almost like there never had been a worry in their lives.

“She looks so happy”, Labrador breathed, “I wonder what made her turn her back to this memory.”

“It’s no use speculating”, Castor said, “and we certainly should not read her journal without permission. Who knows what secrets it may hold.”

“It’s better if we let her keep her secrets to herself”, Labrador added. “Otherwise, we would have to reveal ours to her. No, she needs safety now. Not some strangers reading her private thoughts.”

“What about that photo?” Frau asked.

“I’ll tell her that it slipped out when I picked up the journal”, Labrador said, “maybe I can ask her about the people in the photo. That way, I could learn more about her.”

Castor nodded, pulling Labrador close once again. Labrador snuggled his head against the spot where Castor’s shoulder met his neck. Sighing, Labrador closed his eyes and seemed to drift off to sleep instantly.

Would Labrador’s dreams show him something of Kanon’s future, Castor wondered.

--

Writing this made me so happy you have no idea. I grew up with these characters, I was like 13 or 14 when I watched 07-Ghost and started reading it. It was also the time when I started realising that I am not so straight after all. It's been over 10 years and I, now pretty certain that I would like to experience a poly relationship, wrote three of my fave characters (okay Frau is still on thin ice) being soft and poly and idk it just made my heart do things.

I also feel like I got them really in character! There was definitely a more lighthearted tone while the characters still got the plot forward by talking.

[homosociallyyours]

Can I hear about 5dol?

YES OK

So waaaaaayyyyy back in 2018 one of my fave louies (Rhi, who's no longer on tumblr) did a project called 5 days of Louis. I wrote fic for 4 of the 5 days, each one inspired by one of the songs Louis had released. Of course at that point we only had 4 songs, so for the 5th I used the tiny teaser of "Always You" that we had gotten on his social media, which was literally just, "I went to Amsterdam without you and all I could do was think about you." (Wild to think back to that time, seriously).

I was late finishing the fic, and iirc I just wasn't totally happy with it. I remember opening an AO3 post and starting to put the fic in as a draft, but then I never posted it??? WEIRDLY???

Here's a link to the series parts 1-4, and here's a snippet from the 5th, which perhaps unsurprisingly includes Louis going to Amsterdam without Harry and missing him A LOT. This is after Louis' just gotten home:

“Alright, I need to hear everything about Amsterdam. Did you make it to Begijnhof? Were you able to do one of the canal tours?” Harry asked once they’d started eating. “I hope you took photos; I haven’t been there in years.” 

“We talked every day, love,” Louis said, reaching out to touch Harry’s arm. “Must’ve told you half of it already.” 

“Hardly! Every time we got on the phone, you’d ask me how things were going here, what Niall was up to or how Liam and Zayn’s flat hunting was going. One night we spent half an hour talking about the blueberry honey loaf I was testing out for the cafe.” Louis looked back at Harry incredulously, waiting to see if he had more to say. “You talked a bit about what you were doing, but a lot of that was telling me how well things were going for Lottie or a funny story from one of her business dinners. Feels like I missed all of it, babe,” Harry said, face scrunching into a frown that made Louis reach out to squeeze his hand. 

“Oh love, ‘m sorry. Never meant to make you feel left out. ‘F anything it was like you were there with me. Or like all I wanted was you there with me.” 

“What d’you mean? You missed me?” Harry asked, gazing back at Louis with the fond, careful smile that he sometimes got when he didn’t want to show his hand entirely. 

“More than,” Louis said, stroking Harry’s arm. “I did take one of those canal tours. They have one where they offer you music to listen to as you cruise along, and some of it was so bad. I kept thinking of the faces you’d make at the songs that were playing, you looking back at me and the two of us having a laugh. Had to take the headphones off halfway through, thought I’d listen to the guide, but turns out I’d gotten on the wrong boat. She was speaking French, and I barely caught anythin’ she had to say about the canals.” 

Harry laughed, resting his chin in one hand as he grazed Louis’ wrist lightly with the fingers of the other. “What else? Begijnhof?” 

“I was right in the middle of the garden when Lottie called me. My ringer was on top volume, and it scared the shit outta me. Dropped me phone as it was going off and I thought they were gonna kick me out,” Louis said, laughing to himself at the memory. “So I didn’t get to spend as much time there as you’d have wanted to. But I could see why you wanted me to go there. It was so old and quiet. Thought about walking through it holding hands, maybe the two of us seeing who could make the other be too loud.”