#miarenmert

[miarenmert]

Self portraits 2024

When darkness fades Let the dreamworld end

(Offended – Dreamworld)

This year I was able to understand so much more of what was angering me and find inspiration in what I had been missing all this time.

Bracing myself to say goodbye To pack my bags, run out of sight All of a sudden I realize it's all lies That's my mind playing tricks on me  (Moonlight Haze – The Dangerous Art Of Overthinking)

Also this year the internet brought me the greatest anxiety and suffering from isolation, but in the end it also helped me find accepting people and the hope I thought I had lost.

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Self-portraits 2023

Now that the truth is revealed, pain is no longer in me (Claymorean)

Once upon a time Doors vanished one by one The goddess' home was out of sight Temple's gate Turned into stone Now, no one can go no more to Avalon Where elves are free (Velvet Viper)

In search for things you think will make you happy

You’re sad to see that nothing fills you up

The reason is you already are happy

Enjoy it while you can, don’t you dare to stop! (Szigeti Juli)

[miarenmert]

Marina Mert

I am the dark lady. The creative person is not of this world. The eccentric writer and weary artist, who draws inspiration from my own dreams. By nature, lonely and unsociable, immersed in my own imagination and endless fantastic worlds...

[miarenmert]

Self-portrait 2022

I realized that the culture of the 1920s had been close to me for a long time, and I did not notice this until I got carried away with it in the 2020s ... because history repeats itself. Where am I a true decadent that watches the destruction of everything around with a crack in the heart, but in my head I think only about creativity and entertainment. I listen to new wave swing, although initially I tried to find something completely different. I read the news all the time, even though it only makes me feel worse. Sometimes even bad news is comforting because how many people actually care.

The past is meeting the future

The future is meeting the present

The present is meeting the past

(Wolfgang Lohr & Loredana Grimaudo – Twenties)

Yes, it’s the 1920s

The time is hard enough now

(Coronatus – Josie)

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Self-portrait 2021

Inspired by a dream where I played Arlecchino who couldn't remember who he was before he put on the mask. The performance ended with the fact that I went to the mirror, where I saw the real me. When I woke up, I even remembered the poems that I read in my sleep, but when I tried to write them down, I could only remember the last line: “I want to discern every detail of you.”

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Self-portrait 2021

And I always knew in worlds apart Yeah, I always knew you were An autumn child...

(Coronatus – Autumn Child)

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The Erratic Dungeon

I don't remember how I started descending into this dungeon. I don't remember what led me to it. Fragments of thoughts about magical objects swarm in the corners of memory, they are always different, but with black metal patterns on moonlight gold, turning into violet-blue. Something about scientific experiments with glass that were carried out here. During the last time the red-haired boy stole the key. Something about a woman whose footsteps I followed because I admired her tragic but majestic fate. Something about the dead that were buried here, and I thought I knew who they were, but now I see only their shadows around every corner. I'm scared, but I keep going.

I tried to start this path many times. There is always something here that I didn't expect. And at the same time, everything seems infinitely familiar. Something that I only recognize when I see it and then forget everything but the ghostly images that I can't describe.

There are patterned walls everywhere, covered in circles and spirals. There are secret passages and many levels. There are traps everywhere, the arrangement of which is incomprehensible to my mind. I see through them, I skilfully bypass them, but I am constantly in the dark and do not understand how I see.

Sometimes it looks like crypts, but instead of coffins, passages to the lower levels. Sometimes there are huge expanses of greenish light with stone bridges over refreshing black waters. In such places, I meet the shadows of other people. They are all looking for the same thing as me. We overcome dizzying falls, flying over abysses, to inaccessible walls. There we meet a seer in a scarlet hood, who was something very important, but now I do not remember her words.

Often I am afraid to move forward. Then I stick to familiar places. Again and again I go around the corners that become familiar. I live in them like at home. Gray cold stones covered with patterns - that's all I know and all I want. I’m scared of the unknown that is so close. Lies beyond corners where I haven't been yet. But I'm also curious. I'm drawn to the thought that there's something more out there than these patterned walls. Maybe even something that will lead me to unravel the mystery of the patterns themselves. And for me there is nothing more beautiful than these patterns, and I will go anywhere to unravel them. Their secret can be disappointing. But then I can finally leave. They won't let me go until I know. And if this is what I hope for, this journey will not be in vain. Everything I have found so far has exceeded my expectations, and I can go crazy with what lies ahead for me. So I keep going on, going deeper and deeper.

And there I found a lift that takes me through time, takes me deeper than I could imagine. And I see cosmic dust in the revealing clearings. Through the foggy veil, I see the indescribable colors of the eras when the inhabitants of this dungeon prospered. I see impossible passages opening up where gravity wouldn't let go.

I return to this dungeon in many dreams. But I won’t post my dreams here, because all of them will eventually be woven into my works.

[miarenmert]

Self-portrait 2020

See my face I am blind

Jerked breath from my clogged lungs I am the rust of a forgotten chest

(Hamka – Ignition)

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Different art style self-portraits 2018

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Self-portrait 2017

We won't stand for the violence and mistrust Never shed one single tear for us - You choose Do what you want We have nothing to lose You'll rule the day For every year of abuse - You choose

(White Skull – You choose)

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My solitude

To my deepest regret, it turned out that communication completely drains my creative energy, so again I preferred creativity. And once again I am left alone with a bunch of works, most of which no one will ever see, and exciting ideas in my head that will be forgotten sooner than I have time to embody them...

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Self-portraits 2016

I’ll take my force from the darkness of your eyes

And seal my fate by the cold steel of the sword

(Fairyland – On the path to fury)

Look at us now Your own creation How we grew up Stronger than Gods and Devils

(Whyzdom – Theory of life)

Take my hand we will fly together Return to be born

Only I want to live forever Out of this world

(Dreamaker – Without angels)