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alexlovestarjeiandjack · 3 years

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The Addy and Blaze Chronicles: (Part 1: When I Found You Chapter 1:

Blaze:

The Mer Palace is a buzz with everyone from my aunties, uncles, cousins. literally everyone I have probably ever met in my life. I told dad I don’t want a party for my sixteenth. I swear I told him that every day since my last birthday, but the message still never got through.

“Blaze,” he would call out my name dramatically. “I want to celebrate your life, because we never know how many years we have left.” Very morbid I know. He’s been that way ever since mum died a year ago. Morbid and an overprotective pain my ass.

It’s like no one else gets to mourn her. its all about what he feels and what he wants. Yes you lost the love of your life dad, but I lost my mum too. I never had the time to grieve for myself because I was always looking after you or running the whole damn kingdom on my own at fifteen, without so much as a “Thank you Blaze.” But somehow old man, you have the strength to throw a whole damn party I didn’t ask for.

Suddenly there’s a knock at my door. Should have figured I couldn’t hide in my room all day.

“Are you done moping around? It’s your birthday for God sake. You ungrateful little brat!” Riva. I can only grunt in response to her taunts.

Apparently we had a falling out when we were kids, I don’t think either of us even remember what it was about. I sure as hell don’t but that’s just the normal for us, we hate and torment each other to no end.

I swim over to my mirror taking my time to push my mess of golden curls off my face. Presentable at most.

“Your dad says he has some big news so you better get your tail down here before I come in there!” Riva is still there? Get a life girl!

I run my hand through my hair one last time and look over the old photos I have stuck on my mirror of mum. My favourite one is the one of me and her on her birthday, just a week before she died. You can tell she was sick but she looked happy. We both did. Dad swore I was all her. Maybe that’s why he hasn’t had time for me all year. No Blaze! We are not doing this now. You are not going out in front of all those people looking like you’re breakable. Because you are not breakable Blaze! Head up! Push on!

Riva rolls her eyes at me when I finally come out of the room. “Ungrateful.” She mutters under her breath and I shove her out of my way as my tail takes me out to the palace foyer where dad is making small talk with every person I have ever met.

My cousins give me the cold shoulder. But I don’t care. They’re all maybe one or two years younger than I am. And as soon as I didn’t want to partake in their mer-ball and mer-biking, I became invisible to them. But what do I care. I refuse to be held to their medieval gender roles.

“Blazey!”

Blazey? Okay dad has had a few drinks with the uncles that’s normal enough, no need to panic. Yet.

“Happy Birthday my favourite son!” He swishes about as he comes swimming up to me. He’s not a threat till he takes you out with his giant blue tail. So far so good.

“I’m your only son.” I mumble but he hears me anyway. He laughs.

“Always, with the quick wit but slow with the actual connections to others.” Well that took a turn I wasn’t ready for. A metaphorical tail hit rather than a literal one. My stunned look doesn’t stop him though it never does. He just looks me over like its nothing, waves a dismissive hand and keeps talking. “Which brings me to my news,” He looks between Riva and I with knowing eyes and then back over to Riva’s parents who nod their encouragement.

Oh boy what are they all up to behind my back?? Is there still time to retreat back to my bedroom to my inner sanctum of alone time.

But my dad’s hand on my shoulder tells me its far too late for that.

“I’ve been in discussions with Riva’s parents Joe and Sil. And it is decided that come the eave of Riva’s sixteenth birthday she will be married to Blaze.”

After that time seems to completely stop. My chest tightens and im fighting with everything I have not to pass out. Simutaneously I become aware of everyone’s eyes as they flicker between me and Riva. Some are happy and some are shocked.

Someone, I’m not sure who, says; “Aren’t they a bit young? Yes.

But dad comes back with a reply that I don’t catch and that person doesn’t speak up again. I go back to trying to breath until I feel this rage build up in my stomach and explode out of me. “That is not happening!!” All eyes on me again. Well that what happens when you yell Blaze.

“When I get married, I want to get married because I’m in love.” Yes I’m a sap, I always have been. Is it so wrong that I believe in love? And that I don’t want the usual arranged marriage my people expect of me. And two years early?

The room fills with laughter and snickers, mostly from my cousins who flip the bird too. Dad scolds them and then tells everyone to “quiet down.” Like he’s the one that’s been running the kingdom all year. Like he still holds that power. But sadly he still does and the cousins stop their antics.

Dad turns on his blue tail so we are face to face.

“Blaze, my son. You know that marriage in this kingdom is an alliance, that’s how it is, Riva is your friend and you will grow to love her.” I know what this is, it’s all a show for everyone here. It’s not for me.

I steal a glance at Riva, she flips her brown ponytail on to her back. Completely unfazed. How can she be so okay with this? It’s at this moment I know I have to get out of here. I swing my red tail and high tail it the hell out of there. I don’t know where I’m going its just got to me away from here.

I hear my father calling out to me but its not too long before it becomes muffled background noise.

I swim past dozens upon dozen’s of houses and sea life. My head is filled with a burning rage that leaks out my eyes and I can feel bile rising on my stomach but I don’t stop. I can’t stop I have to get out of here.

They only way out I can see is to keep swimming until nothing looks familiar anymore. Maybe then I can start a new life. A life that isn’t my father’s idea or what anyone else expects of their mer prince.

That’s what this is. It’s what they expect from me and I just won’t do it. I believe in love! I deserve love. I don’t really know how love feels but I know I want it. My grandparents had it before all of this stupid marriage is for alliance bull shit that my dad started preaching after my grandfather died when I was a kid. I’ve seen love, I’ve seen how it fills someone up and how you don’t have to be alone.

Because as much as I say being alone is my style, my way of life. That’s only because it’s the only life I’ve known.

My thoughts turn to anger at my dad because he knows all of this. Knows how I don’t just connect with other people like he does or anyone else in my family. I’m different. And maybe that is okay? Because when I do find love its going to be remarkable. Like nothing else in the world.

But maybe its all just a boyhood dream that ive concocted in my head. The boyhood dreams of a lonely child perhaps?

But I will never find out if I stay here.

Suddenly I’m pulled out of my trance like state by my tail hitting some coral bushes and that’s when I realise I no longer recognize my surroundings. I’m lost. In a different part of the ocean that I’ve never seen before. And its not all relief there’s some anxiety too because I didn’t take into account how safe or unsafe I’d really be out here.

#mermanlove #queer #lgbtqia #fiction #novel #creativewriting #openingchapter #queerbooks

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