#meetingcelebritycrush

[dsmiind]

(IM)POSSIBLE

Hiya, my name is Doris. I have an account on tik tok and I'm doing pretty good. It's something I wated for a while now. I enjoy it and I hope you will check it out if interested. It's ds.mind. Afew months ago I started writting a book. A spicy one. I enjoy reading so I got a few ideas and wrote my own..I will post some of it here, only a few chapters... I hope you'll read it and tell me your thoughts and complaints on it. It's not published yet and I still have a lot of things to make better and change. It's about a girl who met her celebrity crush, but not the usual encounter, I would say...

Enjoy and thank you. <3

I keep recalling things we never did.

                                                                             -Taylor Swift

CHAPTER 1 

ASTORIA

I'VE NEVER BELIEVED IN MIRACLES. LIKE, I BELIEVED THAT THERE IS MORE THINGS that we humans know of, but the things that happened to me were im(possible). I just left my job because they were dicks. Allegedly my coffee was awful, although, my job should have been photography. Oh yes and I left my boyfriend. I was living with him at that time and everything was okay...but I was never normal girl. I always imagined more for me. I believed in real, raw, passionate love and I never got it from Joah. It was childish, cute but never more. And the sex was awful. So, after we broke up, I felt empty and in need of something new. I left town a bit after that happened. It was bitter and sad but I wasn't heartbroken because I think that our relationship was a pure habit.  As bad as that sounds it's true, we just didn't want to admit it. So, enough sad talk, it was my first moving day. My mom, or how my brother would call her, Sara and sister were helping me to bring things upstairs.  My brother Leo and dad were fixing some broken stuff. It was okay apartment, considering it in the center of the city and the price was affordable. I, sure, should start to look for a job but that's problem for another day. My parents are paying for first few months as a reward for finishing college. I hated being dependent on someone but it's okay for now I said to myself. „I am really happy for you, Astoria, this is really big!“ my sister almost shouted. „Thank you, Maria. After everything, every tear and damn nerves that I lost in that damn law school, this is well deserved. I had a very good relationship with my siblings, we were a very happy family.  Although I lived away from them when I was in college, I was sad because this time was a little different. Now, we would be 1,5 hour of drive away, on good days...

I watched Maria and mom leaving with a few boxes in the apartment. I sat for a bit on the bench next to the moving van to appreciate where I am and how happy I am. It was mid September, New York was beautiful at this time of the year. It was warm but also you could sense some chill in the air, and as my phone says, we could expect rain soon. Works for me cuz today all I had to do was unpack everything and chill. I don't have any obligations other than looking for a job and finding myself in this big city. Honestly, living in the countryside was much better for me, I loved it more. I was working with my family on the fields, looking after our animals.  We enjoyed our everyday, mid day, coffee and tea. Unfortunately there are no jobs available for a photographer. So city it is. 

CHAPTER 2

ASTORIA

AFTER THEY HAD LEFT, I STARTED TO UNBOX EVERYTHING AND PUT IT IN THEIR PLACES. 

The closet was way too small for all my stuff but what can you do? That took a few hours so I took a little break, made myself a yogurt bowl and chilled for a bit. After scrolling on social media for what felt like 6 hours, I stumbled upon something that was unbelievable.  Asher Miller is doing a live interaction with his fans at event...TOMMORROW!! I looked at it in pure shock. „Gosh...“ 

Asher is a very famous actor, and I may or may not have a huge crush on him for like a few years now. He is 35 years older than me so that would make him 58, he has a wife, and two daughters. I know how this looks but don't judge. I mean it's not like I'm in love with him. Okay, maybe a bit, but I never in my life thought that I would actually be in a position to be this close to him, let alone meet him. That crush started like every other girl crushing on a celebrity actor.  I would watch pictures on pinterest, see all the movies that he was in, tiktok edits. But after some time, it just evolved into something deeper. Like, I couldn't explain it, but I wouldn't find any other guy attractive. Not a bit, and I would find myself thinking and imagining fake scenarios with him, every day and night. --- Okay, you get the point. But this is it, I could really see him tomorrow night. There is no damn way that I'm speaking with that man but I COULD SEE HIM. After my shock faded a bit, I immediately called Maria. It ringed a few times, it felt like an eternity, but she finally picked up. „Maria, now listen to me because this is unbelievable." She listened.  „Fucking Asher Miller is coming to the city tommorrow to have some live thing. I don't even know, with fans!!“ First, nothing.  Just silence...then she shouted. „Astoria, you have to go, this is all you've ever wanted. You will see him!!! I wish I was there with you, but you're going.“ She was damn right, I am going. „You have to dress sexy, maybe he spots you, you never know!!" I knew that, so I cut our conversation short, and after that, I went to buy a ticket. Thankfully, there was still available tickets, just more expensive. Because it was last minute.  It was an event about whiskey. He would be there as,  of course, a few other famous actors because they all had their whiskeys so that's a link why.  That night I was so nervous I couldn't sleep, I turned and shifted in my bed. I was thinking and dreaming about how it will all be and will he maybe notice me. I knew it was unlikely but hey, a girl can dream. I still can't believe I will see him in real life. Then I started to wonder if I like him as well as through the screen or will he be different, I was very interested. Part of me wanted him to be as attractive to me as he is through the TV. Like, on every interview he got compliments from both women and men. On the other part I hoped he would be different in person so that I could forget about my obsession with him. 

CHAPTER 3

MORNING CAME SO FAST, YET SO SLOW. 

I haven't slept too much but it was enough. I got up, made myself some breakfast, and chilled on my phone. First, I was looking and searching for some jobs, and then TikTok, of course. It might be an obsession  at this point. I loved watching people organize and stage their new houses. Also, I loved cooking videos and people decorating for holidays. Although my for you page was full of Asher. Two hours passed like nothing, and a few more hours separated me from getting ready for that damn event. I texted with Maria the whole time, she was more excited for me than me myself, if that's possible. I called my mom and dad, texted my brother, to catch up with them, because we called every few days. I like that about us. We were a very close knit family, but they couldn't understand my obsession with Asher. I mean, I don't blame them because he was married and a famous man and I don't know what I expect them to say. They were happy that I'm going to my first event in years and they told me to have fun. 6 o'clock came and it was time to start to get ready. I first washed my hair, and put it in a heatless curls method I learned from one girl on TikTok. Then, I did my makeup the best possible. And of course that when you need it to look perfect it won't. So I took everything off, cleaned my face, and did it again. This time was perfect. I had clean skin so thank God it was easy. I did a light eyeliner, lashes and a lot of blush, as like I won't blush immediately when I see HIM. I put lip butter on my lips and waited for my hair to be done. I had one hour to spare before I had to go so it was okay. As I sat on my couch I started to think about how would all of it would look. But nothing came to mind. I couldn't even imagine meeting him because it felt impossible for too long that even now it felt like that. I never was a girl that was obsessed with someone or even celebrity crushes, and I'm not gonna be that girl now. I wasn't obsessed, like I wouldn't chase that man down.  I wouldn't even ask him for a picture if I ever saw him on the street, as if that was ever a possibility. I don't know. It felt weird and inhumanly to do so. I always thought that celebrities are normal people and deserve to have a normal life. As much as possible.

And, of course, you can guess the weather outside. It's freaking raining like there is no tomorrow. I called a cab because I knew it would take a lot of time to get there. I put on my dress. It was a basic, but sexy dress, with a little cleavage that showed my little perky boobs.  I wasn't wearing a bra underneath I put on my best parfume and my black heels with a black bag. After I let my hair down, comb it and spray it, my cab was already here. I locked my doors and got in the car as quickly as possible not to get wet. The drive was okay, slow because of the traffic, loud because of the rain and all the cars passing. Driver was very nice and left me right in front of the building where the event was. I paid, thanked him and headed in there. I had to get to the 3rd floor. I stepped in the elevator and I was so dizzy I almost fell – that's how nervous I was. My breathing was fast and short. Ding – and there I was, WhiskHEY event, full of all kinds of people, but also it felt very normal and relaxed. Everyone was so classy, even the waiters were in suits. They walked throught the crowd and offered us some whiskey and champagne. In the right corner was a band prepping for their five minutes on stage and everything was full and noisy. Not my type of a night out but I know why I was here. And people say that if you want something you never had you have to do something you never did. I stood a few rows further away from the stage. Everyone started to talk quietly and then a woman came and introduced us all in the event and all the actors in it. „Welcome everyone, it's a pleasure to welcome you to our 5th WhiskHEY event. Tonight there will be a lot of guests. Each one of them will present their drink a bit and they will chat with you after that. Don't forget we have an awesome band, as well. Enjoy. I leave the stage to them. I heard a lot of famous names, she mentioned, but couldn't see anyone yet. At that moment everyone started clapping and cheering so ,naturally ,I knew he's gonna come out now. And I was right, HE stepped on the stage at that very moment. 

 

CHAPTER 4

HE LOOKED EXACTLY LIKE ON THE SCREEN. 

Tall, skinny, tattooed arms and fingers, short shirt, black jeans.  He looked so sexy with his gray and black beard and his damn smile while he crunches his nose. He was literally a walking sex god. I was looking at him for some time while some other actor spoke. Honestly, I didn't even got what he was saying. Something about his career, the whiskey he made and all about it, I have no clue. I heard nothing. I was staring at him, lost track of time or space, actually I think I wasn't even breathing. Fortunately, I managed to come to my senses when the other actor took the mic. I drank a little bit of champagne that got warm in my hand and listened to Enrick Jones.  (Another famous actor, who starred in one movie with Asher). I was so deep in my thoughts I didn't notice that Asher's turn was next. I snapped out of it and took a few pictures then sent it to Maria, who freaked out and sent probably approx. a thousand stickers and emojis. I watched and listened so closely to everything he said. He spoke about his family and how happy he is with his life and career.  Don't get me wrong I am happy for him, but Jesus, I couldn't help it. I felt some strange feeling in my stomach.  I felt all kinds of feelings, my body was so hot, and my face burning while I watched him. After him, there were 3 more guys who spoke about their things and they were gone from the stage. The intro of them talking wasn't long, you figured. But, that's because they'll have a chat with fans in a few minutes.. The audience welcomed, again, that woman from the start.  She said that the meet and greet will be starting now.  Staff started to put stools and tables on the stage for them and people started to crowd. I knew that there was no way in hell I'm going to talk to him.  Even though Maria sent like a hundred messages about how I should go and meet him, but I couldn't. If I met him, I think I couldn't move on with my life. 

I should've left earlier, because now it's so crowded I can barely move. I don't understand the rush. Room is big but small enough to see and hear them no matter how far you are. I stood there for a minute more, waiting for space to clean a bit. At that moment, the waiter was passing by, so I put my glass on the tray.  Finally I turned around to leave. I was looking at my feet because I didn't wanna trip and fall in my heels, but then I bumped into someone. Brick wall, tall man stood in front of me in the crowd. „Damn, I'm sorry, darling.“ He smiled gently and put his hand, friendly, on my shoulder. Our eyes locked and then I figured it was Asher!!!