#meanwhile gerda is being quieter than i had anticipated BUT not uncomfortable around people
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Tumblr is available in 18 languages.
Text
.
#so my characters are becoming EXTREMELY independent and i haven't even finished the first chapter yet#*sharpay voice* 'this is not what i planned' lol#kay specifically is just doing whatever the heck he wants#my original conception of his character was that he was very socially aloof and kind of deliberately cultivated the 'tragic artist' vibe#but currently he's turning out a bit like tom from the glass menagerie and he's trying to be an EXTROVERT. darling you're not an extrovert?#stop being so charming??? where did you get those social skills?? I DIDN'T GIVE YOU THOSE GET BACK HERE#meanwhile gerda is being quieter than i had anticipated BUT not uncomfortable around people#which i think i like for her#she's not necessarily a 'social butterfly' but she gets along with everyone and everyone knows her#she overall is very comfortable with her environment and with who she is#she's not quite a woman but has already begun to hollow out her#own little place in her community to make it a home#(the problem is she doesn't know who she is to everyone else and#what she means to them. and by 'everyone else' i mainly mean kay but he's not the only one#she wants to know how to be of value within her community and what exactly that means)#she knows who she is in her community but doesn't have a sense of who she is on her own#meanwhile kay is so uncomfortable with where he is and who he is. you look at him and you feel he might jump out of his own skin any#minute and shed it like a snake#he feels that the safe haven he's grown up in is confining him like a childhood bed you outgrow#and he's seen so many people leave for good and so many people close to him in abandoning him have apparently found something out there#that fulfills them and is more important than he was to them that he feels there MUST be something out there to fill the void inside him#that's eating him alive#he can see the beauty of his little world around him but he only as representative of the greater beauty that must lie beyond#am i saying abandonment breeds abandonment? i don't know?#and it's this point of tension that lies between them unspoken because how do you address something that integral to your being at that#age? how do you even articulate it? can you even make sense of it in your own head?#but the tension is there and they both feel it and it grows more tangible the older they get and IF ONLY I COULD TRANSLATE IT TO PAPER#anyway sorry feel free to ignore this just working out writing problems in the tags#val's ocs
3 notes
·
View notes