#meanwhile I just had to pay a shit ton of money to schedule a 2 min interview to renew my student visa

[charlotte-of-wales]

Yeah somehow I doubt they would fail him. He’ll get the citizenship even if he answered every answer wrong

u know what that also crossed my mind. I'd doubt he's following all correct immigration procedure at the moment and he's still allowed to come and go as he pleases.

[vampykitty-kun]

This is the stuff I have to deal with:

The roommate’s GF quit her job a week ago. In that time I guess she’s been applying places but honestly I’m not up her ass and have no idea what she does and does not do outside of when I see her in the house or evidence left.

In that past week the dishes in the sink built up and were never washed. I could tell that she was waiting to see how long it took for me to do them. Except that their dishes are not my responsibility. I do all of my dishes either as/after I cook or in the case of dishes brought up to my room I do let them pile up a few days then I bring them down and wash them all at once. None of those dishes in that sink are mine and I’ll be damned if I’m going to wash them.

Well today she gets fed up and has a temper tantrum.

We crossed paths in the kitchen, she was doing the dishes and cleaning the stove all the wile slamming things around and ranting about how she’s the only one who ever does shit, etc, etc. Meanwhile I’ve already explained to you all the dishes situation. But let’s address the stove shall we? What is all over the stove? Pasta sauce and coagulated oil from things being fried. I’m sure most of you have tried to clean old fried oil off the stove or wall in the past so you know what I’m talking about. Well guess what? I haven’t made pasta in weeks, and it’s been way longer since I fried something. So again, not my problem. Am I maybe guilty of some mystery sticky on the center of the stove from leaving a spoon/spatula there while cooking? Probably. I won’t lie there. But the shit she’s having a fit about is her own doing.

Moving on...

We decided last month that we were all responsible for our own food. I had to buy and cook my own, those two as a couple had to buy and cook their own, and this other guy that was living with us and just moved out a few days ago had to buy and cook his own shit too. She was getting pissed off that she was having to cook a meal for all 4 of us each night- when no one EVER asked her to, and that none of the rest of us 3 were cooking dinner for everyone ever. So the solution was us being on our own which I had ZERO issue with. Except I’m apparently the only responsible and functioning adult living here (which holy fuck am I not a good example, so guys seriously, get your shit together!!!!! You’re 30 and 26, the 19yo that was living here at least had some excuse) and am the only one that pays attention to things. She got a link card. She knows how much she was supposed to get. She got a sheet stating how much she was supposed to get. Yet there was double that on the card. They spent it all last month, and then they were flailing around freaking out because no more money popped up on it this month. So now they have no link food money. Well like I said, she quit her job, which I can understand that part as she was driving a taxi, and they were just not getting calls. So after gas and the rental fee she was coming home with like only $6 some nights. But anywho, so she has no money for food OR rent. Well he’s working 5 days a week long hours, and he’s been giving the landlord his entire check just about. So, again they have no food money. but that’s not my fault.

Well for some reason, despite her being the one to initiate the whole “everyone for themselves” rule, she felt entitled to my food. I got on his ass about it, because trying to talk to her goes nowhere and I don’t actually want to start a physical fight. I start bringing most non-fridge stuff up to my room, and stuff in the fridge is all in tied grocery bags, and freezer stuff the same other than the freezer door which is also all mine. Despite all that’s going on some days I have a lot of leftovers from what I’ve cooked, and I’ve taken pity on them and shared some of the leftovers with them because there was just that much. Most of my meat is frozen when I get it or too large like a small roast, so I can’t portion out. But I’ve either offered or he’s asked me. Now, after I've bagged all my crap up she asks one day after he’s at work what food they can eat. She then gets pissed off when I said they could mess with the pantry stuff, as we have like 6 bags of rice, a bunch of different bags/boxes and types of noodles, and a ton of veggie canned goods. But she’s pissed because I won’t let them eat like my cheese, eggs, or meats and stuff. I tell my roommate this and he actually went off on her and gave her a massive lecture about how they’re not entitled to food I paid for. Things go okay for a few days after that.

But then, I made a shepherd’s pie sort of thing the other day. I go down for another piece a few hours later to find a slice missing. Turns out she took it, without asking, and hid it in the fridge for him for when he‘d come home from work. No asking, just did it, and did not tell me until I confronted them about it.

Then yesterday 2 of the 5 bananas I bought for banana bread were missing, taken and eaten by her without asking.

And now tonight, I made myself a small pork roast, with these garlic spinach noodles, and a can of mixed veggies with butter. The roast is larger than I can eat in one sitting, I know this. I will also have leftovers of the veggies and noodles. He comes home from work, says what I’m cooking smells good, and he says he’s running to the gas station. Asks if I want some soda, I say yes and offer to pay, but he’s like I’ve got it. Cool. She says she’s going to take a shower while he’s gone. Well he leaves, she states that she’s starving, looks at my food that’s in the oven just keeping warm, and says she’ll eat some of that when she gets out of the shower- without me offering and without even asking me, and then she leaves to take her shower. Meanwhile he comes home, I let him know what she said/did and he gets all flustered and frustrated with her. I’m like dude, it’s one thing for me to offer, or for you guys to ask, but neither happened. She comes down, starts rummaging for plates, he waits it out, and sure enough there’s no asking going on. HE then asks me, I say I guess even though I really didn’t want to share, and she gets all pissy, appalled that I wasn’t just going to let them take. She starts banging plates around and making noise with the silverware. All reasonable actions but purposely made loud to show her anger. She plates food out for the two of them, gets pissed off/jealous that we’re having an in depth conversation without her, and she leaves me a butt end of the roast, a thin piece, almost entirely fat- which I can’t eat as the texture in my mouth makes me gag. Something I’ve brought up before. Meanwhile, they eat, and go upstairs, and I wash MY dishes. While washing them I can hear him go off on her about not asking and crap and she’s basically all pissy and proud and arguing with him.

Like I don’t even consider this guy a friend anymore. But we’re getting along almost as well as we did in the start having a common human to vent about, and I am admittedly getting surges of happiness when he takes my side in shit, because then I know I’m seriously in the right.

Now on top of all this, she complains to him that I don’t clean the house- when I lock myself in my room the entire time I’m home unless in the bathroom or kitchen for brief periods of time. NOTHING is my mess. She’s also bitching about the gas and internet bill and how I’ve not given her any money for it. Meanwhile NO ONE has given me any money for the electric bill since it was put in my name in February. Even with me paying $100 on it each month the bill is currently sitting at $300 and I never paid anything on it this month because I was broke until today. When it was just me during the week my bill was $25. It has gone up massively with her and the other guy and now 2 ACs running with the heat. She leaves all the damn lights on all day, I run around shutting them off several times a day and she turns them back on, and she leaves their TV and AC running 24/7 most of the time even when they’re not home. So no, I’m not giving you shit for the measly gas bill. Now the internet? This month is the FIRST bill. Prior to this bill I’m the one that paid the damn $50 deposit connection fee! But again, the electric bill applies here thereafter, and I did not agree to her getting cable on the bill that is only in their room that I don’t watch when I have it let only when it’s only in their bedroom. And on top of these bills, because she’s not working, he has asked me to pay HALF of next month’s rent to compensate, instead of 1/3. When I just paid $100 this month, and $600 the month before that they were supposed to partly pay me back for and didn’t. (rent is $600 per month). And it’s like, I do not want to be paying most of the rent, for all of the electric bill, and all of the food, to live here and be miserable while you mooch off me. Especially when I did not give my consent for her to move in in the first place, nor the 19yo guy that lived here for 2.5 months. None of this shit is fair. I’m trapped her though until my housing gets moved back out this way and the guy doing it is taking FOREVER to have a spot in his schedule free to move it. I’m going nuts.

[vampykitty-kun]

Update:

Well, it’d been about a year or so and I guess it’s time to say that I’m not dead. I’ve only just now, as of an hour ago, gotten internet hooked up in my ‘home’.

This past year was a train-wreck.

the move I planned for almost 2 years, and spent all my savings on, was a bust. I had to move back after only 3 months, because once I got out there the property owner changed their mind on a whole bunch of crap. I spent the entire summer in 80-100 degree weather and no AC. Given that I was up in Wisconsin and lived my entire life in northern IL me and heat do not get along. They wouldn’t let me have the electric company come out and install electrical lines, because the company needed the property owner to sign off on it and he was a paranoid ass that kept insisting he was going to get stuck with the bill despite me having the cash in hand and the order being under my name. I spent the 3 months with one extension cord, no gas, no plumbing.

The guy that moved me out there also moved me home. He was a neighbor that was friends with my mother but only 3 years older than me. He was in a rough spot. Lost his job, his girlfriend left him, and the roommates he acquired after she left stole the rent $ and ditched him. By the time the 6 hour drive home was done he managed to convince me to move into his house. My father had stolen my bedroom after I moved out, threw out all my furniture, and was not going to give my room back. Neither parent wanted me to move back in with all of my pets either. I would have been stuck taking my grandma’s old room, which never would have fit all my stuff, and I had no furniture to speak of while this guy already had a bed, dresser, and TV in a room for me.

I took the chance and moved in. Honestly I just wish I never tried to leave home. I moved in mid September and spent the next several months without internet, paying all his back rent, paying most of the ongoing rent, buying all the food and cleaning supplies, etc, etc, etc, to the point that I’ve never been so tapped out financially in my life. He did start working on Halloween, but then was bad with his money, and it took several occasions before i had to start demanding to see rental receipts because not only would he often not give the landlord as much as he said HE was giving him, he often kept money I gave him for the rent and spent it elsewhere. Then because He was having to ride a bike home 40 mins from work as the buses didn’t run that late, he bought a beater car from a co-worker when we still weren’t caught up on rent. In the end I had to even contribute to that cost. Then we were FINALLY almost all caught up and he was laid off the first week of March. 

It got to the point that I flat out refused to pay for anything anymore, sold some things, and started saving money for my own place. But as many people know, renting with multiple pets is a nightmare. We were about to be evicted, he at the drop of a dime acquired a girlfriend who moved in the day they started seeing each other, and I ended up having to drop another $600 to avoid ending up out on my ass. He and she were of course supposed to contribute to that, but they didn’t. She did get a job and start paying rent after that, but he only managed to finally start work last week. I of course no longer have money saved up to move out so I’m trapped here until at LEAST July. I had to pay to get the internet hooked up and $100 towards rent again just 2 days ago.

Past housing related issues there have been plenty. 

Right before I moved out May 2016 my grandmother had a stroke. She ended up in rehab, recovered some after a few months, then came home. But then she had another stroke and ended up with mercer, and ended up back in the hospital just a week after coming home. She did not recover that time. She ended up in hospice. I did manage to go see her a few times before she passed away November 4th, just 2 days after my mother’s birthday and we had gone to see her.

Atticus, my sweet, adorable smooshy faced kitty jumped out the window a week before Halloween. I had repeated yelled at my roommate to put the screens back in the window, but he was ‘anti-screen’ saying it blocked air flow. I then repeated told him to warn me if the windows were open so I could lock Atticus in my bedroom. He of course never remembered. I was outside when he jumped out the window, I heard his collar bell, and did go after him. Unfortunately it was already dark out and I had no idea where the flashlight was, so when he dove into the garage I let him stay there. The garage has no power and has been used as storage so it would have been a nightmare trying to get in there in pitch black. he had gotten out a couple times before, during the day though, and after an hour or so he’d always come running if called. Those of you that followed me closely know I’m very anti-indoor/outdoor cat due to the zillion safety risks. I wasn’t thrilled by any of this. Well I tried an hour later to get him in and he did not come. I sat down, watched a movie, and just as it ended it started storming. I went out looking for him, got soaked completely through my coat, got the flashlight from the roommate who was home by this point, and NOTHING. He was no longer in the garage, not in the yard, not under any of the cars, not at my mother’s around the corner, he simply vanished. I went a few hours later and checked again after it stopped raining, and nothing. Checked in the morning, nothing. Walked the neighborhood listening for his bell when I called, nothing. I put up fliers. I called every animal control, shelter, rescue, and vet in the area. Nothing. Brought the fliers to them even. Checked animal control and the local rescue in person several times, nothing. I had this cat for 10.5 years and he just vanished without a trace. I got to hoping that someone at least found him and was cruel enough to me and attached to him to keep him. He was half persian which is a desirable look. But at least in that situation he’d be alright. My roommate watch me go nuts for weeks never giving up. It all ended when I found out from this girl he liked and I never talked to (I guess he thought I never would, but I went to McD’s and we started up a convo though when we ran into each other) that my cat was dead. As it turns out my roommate’s friend a block away found him the day after the storm dead at the curb in the grass near his house. My poor cat ended up hit by a car in a thunderstorm and died alone and in pain, all because of stupid ass screens. Instead of giving me the closure, my roommate hid this shit from me. He apparently told the girl this saying he had to get it off his chest but didn’t want to upset me. Then when I confronted him, he denied it. But he’d lied to me about so many things since moving in I never believed him. I continued to bring it up regularly, until he finally got fed up and admitted it to me. He claimed he went to confirm that it was him, then came home for a bit before he went back to pick him up, only to find that the city had already removed him. I doubt it. So not only did I not get the closure, but I didn’t get to bury him or anything. He never intended to tell me. he watched me continue searching. Watched me gt into the neighbor’s car and go to animal control various times. So yeah... coming on here to see that my profile pic was still my poor cat landed me in some serious angst...

Then after Grandma passed and the new year started, my mother had a stroke. Just after grandma had had her two. Turns out she had lupis, and it did something to her heart and tissue tore, and some of that tissue pinged around in her brain. She didn’t lose any feeling, but her speech and some other things were affected for a couple weeks. Because it was the heart and lupis that ultimately caused it, they ended up having to put her on the proper meds, and she had to have open heart surgery to correct the tears. She has since recovered mostly.

Meanwhile I’ve been having a nervous breakdown and existential crisis the past years and it finally blew up to the point where I couldn’t function at all, barely left bed, slept an average of 14 hours and still woke up physically and mentally exhausted. I had lost a good 15lbs out in Wisconsin for 3 months but at this time I have since gained 30lbs. Enough was enough, I started having some seriously shitty thoughts, and I went and got a medical card and adulted, scheduling a shit ton of appointments. I’ve started getting my bad teeth fixed, the ones I suffered through for the past 6 years. My blood pressure is magically stable despite the massive amounts of stress. No diabetes, a miracle. All my bloodwork came back normal. They have me scheduled to check for a couple different cancers, as there’s several in my immediate family. They have me seeing a therapy lady 1-2 a month for anxiety and depression. My anxiety got so bad in all of this that I started breaking out into hives and rashes at random. They have me on anxiety meds now and while they’re still trying to figure out dosages it did completely get rid of the rashes. They want to see how I do on these before they decide how to address the depression. They said if I think I need it they can assign me to someone to see weekly, but really I’m taking baby steps. 

Past all angst and chaos I’ve really not done that much fandom related, and I feel I have to apologize even though I guess I sorta have a legitimate excuse? I did draw some things during my time out in Wisconsin. They’re inked and I had started coloring them but never did finish. I didn’t touch any of my fics, though I certainly don’t want to abandon them, it’s just been a bad time. I did however start on two actual novel-novels, one of which is probably 2/3 of the way through. It was honestly easier in all of this to write something outside of fandom.

As for what I’m currently into, I’m still a big BatFam fan, but I did get into the Marvel Cinematic universe, and several Marvel comic titles outside of that. For the most part not their big main people, I like a lot of the smaller characters and a lot of the alternative versions of main people. I also dove into Teen Wolf the past couple months and a I forgot how much anything werewolf related thrilled me, so it’s been a good time there.

Idk where I’m going from here. I waited to come back to tumblr until I had my own internet connection. I guess I’ll just have to see how things go. I did miss this site’s content quite a bit, and shit, I really missed a lot of the people on here even though I’m sure some of you are gone, and no one has the same profile pics anymore, and a lot of you have even changed your names, so things are confusing, but I’ll figure it out.

I’m glad to be back and I seriously hope I can finish pulled myself out of this hole.

~Vampy