#means having blood on your hands. not like fawn. spotless and clean. a little broken but not unfixable. they’ll fix them :) they’ll Help :)

[villainsidestep]

(chanting) heartbreak!fawn !! heartbreak!fawn !!

oh survivor!fawn we are really in it now

[theunrealinsomniac]

Prompt 15,16,45 & 47 :D

Holy shit lol, okay, I’m gonna do these as separate little drabbles cus … well cus i can lol. I’m assuming these are all NaruSaku so …

15 - Don’t die on me - Please

Naruto spat blood onto the ground near him, some of it covering his raw and ruined shoulder. That final attack had come at far more of a cost than he’d expected. Or knew how to deal with. 

Sasuke knelt by his friend’s side and tried to hide the dread in his chest as he looked at what used to be Naruto’s jounin vest, the left side of it torn away like some kind of monstrous hand had ripped at him.

‘Son of a bitch,’ Naruto bubbled, the blood filling his mouth from his position on the floor. ‘Tell me you got that snake bastard.’

The last Uchiha’s Sharingan flared, the ebbing flow of chakra around them suddenly visible again. He nodded once. The foul chakra that had belonged to Orochimaru long since extinguished. 

The two halves of Sasuke’s old … sensei didn’t sound right and he’d die before calling the repulsive serpent master. Regardless, Orochimaru’s body lay in pieces from the joint attack, his final act of defiance being to drive a fang into Naruto’s heart as a serptine arm had launched out towards the blond.

‘Don’t move.’ Sasuke kept a firm grip of Naruto’s shoulder, trying his best not to excaberate the wound. And failing.

Naruto hissed. ‘Is he dead?’

Sasuke nodded again. ‘And so will you be if you aren’t still. Sakura is on her way.’ 

As if saying her name summoned her, Sakura dropped into the ravine they had fallen into and landed hard on the side of the small creek. ‘Naruto!’

Naruto coughed as he collapsed onto his back, too fast for even Sasuke to reach down and ease him down.

‘Sasuke move!’ A pink blur all but threw Sasuke out of the way as he was summarily dismissed by the third member of their team. ‘Stupid man, why didn’t you wait for back up?! Why do you never wait for backup?’

‘Sorry Sakura-chan,’ Naruto forced out. ‘Got the bastard though didn’t we Teme?’

‘They’ll throw you a parade when we get home,’ Sakura hissed sarcastically as soft green chakra glow covered her hands and she ran them over his prone form. ‘Okay, nothing broken, Kurama’s already started to heal what he can … but that poison … Sasuke, come over here, I need you to brace him.’

Sasuke moved, his hands on Naruto’s shoulders, keeping the stupid idiot still as those sharp blue eyes zeroed in on Sakura.

‘Okay Naruto,’ Sakura started, positioning her grip better around the large fang before looking him dead in the eyes. ‘This is gonna hurt and if I can’t get the poison out … just don’t die on me. Please,’ she finished, her voice catching on the final last word.

Naruto just nodded, his gaze never leaving Sakura.

The noise that came out of the blond was agonising as Sakura slowly eased the fang out of him. Sasuke had never heard him scream like that and it was all he could do to not look away. 

Once it was out, flung away so hard it embedded in the ground at the end of Sakura’s ever impressive throwing arm, the pinkette went to her task, her fingers going to the gaping wound in Naruto’s chest, eeking out the poison in globs and it was at that point that Naruto had started shaking.

Sakura had the poison out and Naruto’s wound started to heal with the combined help of Kurama and good old fashioned medic-nin jutsu. 

The blond fell asleep with a touch of Sakura’s chakra as she bandaged him up, the whole process being more or less pointless as the Kyuubi would have him healed up in minutes.

‘I know the idiot has already apologised Sakura,’ Sasuke muttered so only she could hear. The dozing moron’s head resting on Sakura’s lap after all. ‘But I am sorry we didn’t wait for you.’

‘It’s fine,’ Sakura said, her eyes glued to the rising and falling of Naruto’s chest. ‘It’s just lucky you caught up to him before he found Orochimaru and tried to take him on alone. I know he’s strong enough to crush that monster in a straight up fight … but he’s never exactly been the tactician he needs to be to take out someone as crafty as that.’

‘Good thing he has us to pick up his slack in that regard,’ Sasuke said.

Sakura didn’t appear to hear him though, her fingers playing idly with the ends of his fringe.

‘Stupid moron,’ Sakura murmured at long last, her hand resting over his heart. ‘Stupid, brave moron.’

Yes, Sasuke had to agree.

16 - I never meant to hurt you

Naruto let the keys fall onto the counter as he stumbled into the empty house. Too empty.

The shopping, left on the counter from when Mubeki had stormed out the house last night, still hadn’t been packed away.

He guessed she hadn’t come back before …

That was fine, just meant he had something to do when he allowed himself to stop and think for a minute. He gave it a cursory sniff to make sure there wasn’t anything off. 

Eyeing the newspaper next to them, reading the headline Two dead as Konoha Hospital is latest target of Oto terrorists!

Turning the newspaper over, he draped his coat over his chair at the breakfast island and slumped down into the sofa.

His hands went to his face, scraping down with the heels of his hands and tried to will away the dagger sharp tears in the corners of his eyes. How could this happen?

How could she have left him?

The question rattled around his head for the twentieth time since he’d started walking home from the hospital. 

It was unfair, the question, he shouldn’t ask it. Sakura didn’t leave him because she wanted to. She didn’t have a choice.

He clicked the answerphone message button on the home phone and waited through the autotone woman’s voice, that Sakura had always hated, telling him he had two new messages and one saved one.

First message - from Tsunade on Tuesday twentieth of October at eight-seventeen pm. ‘Hi Naruto, I’m just letting you know that I’m still okay to look after the kids for another week if you need it. Though they keep asking where Daddy is, it might be a good idea to pop round tomorrow, if you can manage it. I understand it’s still hard but you know Sakura wouldn’t want this. Anyway, call me. I’m worried about you.’

Naruto leant over, pressing the delete button and grit his teeth against the sob that was coming.

Second message - from Dr Aburame on Tuesday twentieth of October at six-thirty-six pm. ‘Hello Mr Uzumaki. I was just calling to remind you about your wife’s insurance forms. I hate to push but you need to sign them and return them soon. The longer you leave it the worse it will get. I can have them to the hospital lawyers and HR quickly and this nightmare can start to end. Please look after yourself Mr Uzumaki, Dr Uzumaki would not want you to dwell on what can not be changed. Hopefully I shall see you soon.’

Another quick delete and Naruto felt himself tense before the saved message was even played. The saved message beeped in and Naruto closed his eyes.

First saved message - from Sakura on Sunday twenty-first of September at nine-fifty-two pm. ‘HI babe, I tried your cell but you weren’t answering. I don’t know if you were in work or out but … well I thought best to leave a message on our machine just in case. I … just wanted to say, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for all those horrible things I said, I know you love me I never should have said you didn’t anymore just to get a rise. That was cruel of me and if I could take it back I would in a heartbeat. I didn’t mean to hurt you I was just so angry and scared … let’s just forget it all happened and start fresh. If that’s what you want. It’s what I want. Please call me back when you get this. I’m going to start my rounds in an hour but I’ll be free by the time you get out of work. I love you Naruto, I always will.’

The tears fell hard as he clung to the phone, pressing the replay button as he curled into a ball around it and listened to the last call Sakura had ever made to him over and over again.

45 - Do you trust me?

Sakura was having a weird day.

No seriously, it was just flat out weird. It had started weird, it had continued to be weird and she was pretty sure it was going to end weird.

When she’d come through to her kitchen in her student apartment, it was clean. Which while not unwelcome and honestly not even that much of a problem normally … there was always a certain level of clutter on the counter.

A chopping board or a plate left on the side and not the sink. Something. But today? It was so spotless you’d have thought they had a professional cleaner who had come in while they’d all slept and left with nothing but the scent of lemon pledge.

Maybe the boys hadn’t been back yet and so Ino had slipped out and ransacked the kitchen with cleaning supplies? She liked having Naruto and Kiba living with them, it left their apartment always quite alive with fun and laughter … and the fact that both men had a tendency to lose their shirts and were in the sort of shape that made grown women drool … she assumed, she of course would never allow herself to be so crude.

Though she had to throw a tshirt at Naruto once because he seemed to not get that he had to wear clothes when she was around.

She was actually kind of annoyed with herself for that. She was a medical student, she’d seen more naked men and women than the rest of her housemates combined … but there was just something about Naruto in nothing but his pyjama bottoms that made her all gooey. Sure he was cute but she couldn’t be that attracted to him could she?

So yes, the kitchen was clean, that was weird. Her classes had gone rather mundane though. Except for Shizune, the assistant of Tsunade’s anatomy class let her pet teacup pig loose and it had put nearly all the girls in the room torn between listening to the lecturer and fawning over the cute piggie.

Then for some reason she’d allowed herself to be dragged out to a house party. Which was where the weirdness continued.

‘Sakura!’ Ino hissed as she pulled the woman aside as she entered after a man with bright blue hair and a shark tattoo on his neck. ‘You gotta see this!’

Sakura was pulled through to the backyard and found something that she wasn’t quite sure how to process.

Naruto and Kiba, shirtless again for Kami’s sake, were doing shots in the middle of a large semi circle. It was a competition of some sorts which … well to be honest wasn’t too much of a surprise.

What was surprising though … was that after the shot they both did Kiba managed to one up Naruto, if that’s what you wanted to call it, by sticking his tongue down the unsuspecting throat of a nearby girl with lavender hair and almost supernaturally pale eyes, who’s cheeks burst into pink fires as she slowly came back to Earth to hold onto Kiba.

Who was grinning winningly at the woman before smugly staring Naruto down. As if daring him to match him. Which he obviously would, there were tons of gorgeous and willing women gathered around as if they’d known this was coming.

So the weirdness intensified when Naruto turned, sweaty and shirtless and filled with surety and intensity that sent sparks up her spine when their eyes connected. 

He was in front of her before she was aware what was happening and his words were muttered much softer than she’d ever expected.

‘Do you trust me Sakura?’ 

She nodded. Did that mean he was going to … oh Kami, she could feel her cheeks burning way before his hands cupped her cheeks and soft lips captured hers in a much more delicate kiss than the one Kiba had given the woman who was still trying to remember her name.

Fire, not electricity, burned somewhere below her navel and Sakura leaned into Naruto, her mouth opening readily as the kiss deepened as his hands went from her face to her hair, to the small of her back as he pulled her in and she almost crumpled against him when the kiss broke.

‘Ha! Nowhere near as intense as our kiss Naruto! You lose!’

Sakura wanted to argue that that had been way more intense and she was about to try and pull away when Naruto captured her attention all over again with two simple words/

‘Worth it,’ he murmured before kissing her again, his arms going around her as she returned the kiss with as much fire as she could drag away from her belly.

Like she said. Weird day.

47 - You’re cute when you’re angry

Naruto had really done it this time.

A vein was popping in Sakura’s head. He could see it, it was so obvious he was sure the children he would now never have could probably see it.

‘Do you have anything to say before I knock your block off Naruto?’ Sakura growled, water from the lake he had cannonballed in to right by her … he’d only wanted to say hi instead of shout it! 

Okay, he could do this! He could stop his teammate from decking him halfway across the training fields. She’d understand he’d just been excited to see her, yeah, they’d spent so little time together recently during the peace after the war had ended. Between her time at the hospital and his time being groomed for the Hokage chair by Kakashi and Tsunade … well it had been a while.

‘I’m waiting Naruto,’ Sakura snarled as she started stomping over to him, trying to shake the last droplets of water of her gloved fists, the water having made her long pink hair slick against her head like she’d just gotten out of the shower. Water making her already lovely skin glisten in the summer sun.

She looked divine and he wouldn’t even pretend she didn’t. Actually … it gave him what would hopefully be his ticket out of a walloping.

‘Erm … you look cute when you’re angry?’

He held up his hands, Sakura pausing mere centimetres from him when he’d shouted out his lacklustre defence. 

Once he’d noticed he wasn’t faceplanting the nearest wall, he dared to crack open an eye as Sakura was stood, crossing her arms in a huff, the summer sun making her cheeks red as she looked away from him and frowned.

‘Just don’t do it again you moron.’

‘Course,’ Naruto said tentatively. ‘Are you okay Sakura? Your face is red, maybe you should could stand under the shade of the waterfall? Help you cool off? It’s actually why I’m even here, it was so hot after training I had to get out of my smelly clothes and go for a dip.’

Sakura’s eyes ran over him and she glanced away, her face getting a little redder. ‘No I’m fine, I ‘ll just take a cold shower when I get home. A really cold shower, yeah, that will do it. Bye Naruto.’

And with that Sakura turned around and walked away. Having not kicked his ass.

Which he counted as a win, before he went back to the waterfall and let the cool water wash over him.

He hoped Sakura wasn’t coming down with sunstroke, she had looked really red when she was leaving.

[sidesteppostinghours]

#gideon shut the hell up challenge#people keep saying they’re sorry for your loss. Your Loss. that is how they refer to your brothers. how they refer to you.#you have always been one of three. part of the pack. and that has always been fine but now you are alone and you are not You but your loss.#julia says sorry for your loss. ricardo says sorry for your loss. you yell that it should be their loss too. it is everyone’s loss.#they have lost your brothers and now they have lost you too. (fate works in funny ways you think)#at the funeral people offer apologies. offer you flowers. offer you baked goods and stories of how [your loss] saved them or their mom or#their dad’s uncle’s wife’s coworker’s daughter’s friend from childhood or someone else equally unimportant. someone alive.#[I’m sorry for your loss] they all say and you do not say thank you. there is no being thankful for [your loss].#[I’m sorry] says ricardo. you stop listening. [I’m sorry] says julia. you wonder if she said it to the man she punched.#you do not apologize back. you do not let it be [their loss]. it is yours. they have always been yours.#[I’m sorry] says chen . for river and cyrus. the first to use their names with you. to acknowledge them as your brothers. to make them more#than just the pieces of you that have been broken. and you thank him.#we like writing in tags sorry !!!! also at some point the original idea was that any parts of ‘I’m sorry for your loss’#would start distorting and then get blacked out to show like. when u hear smth so much and esp w grief that u just block it out#anyway. survivor!fawn but still factoring in that chen is not afraid to just. Say Things.#esp in v3 I think the ortegas would be even more cautious w fawn out of wanting to not upset them and meanwhile chen is like yeah I’m gonna#just straight up acknowledge ur brothers for u bc I can tell that’s what u need#we are also thinking abt v3!au and fawn being heartbreak but. that’s not for this post obvs

#gideon shut the hell up challenge#really most of this is a continuation of the last hb!f post but. we will repeat it bc !! thoughts !!!#north purposefully reading the paper in front of fawn while keeping tabs on them…. watching as their eyes are glued to the headlines#the first is about heartbreak. the loss of the sidesteps. the fact that one survived. the funeral.#he says he can’t let them read the articles (maybe if they’re good he promises and the numbers mean they can’t tell if he’s lying) but then#well. if he takes juuust long enough for them to read the front article while he flips through the shit inside… how is that His fault? :)#one brother is dead he says. the other brother is alive. and he says they’re dead too. fawn tries to argue but he points out that#if he was going to rescue them wouldn’t he have? he saw you fall fawn. he knows there’s no body. where’s your brother? where’s his loyalty?#north says fawn has always been faithful. he knows that. he knows Them. he’s their handler! of course he knows them! so he knew they would#come back :) and if their brothers knew them wouldn’t they know? wouldn’t they care? wouldn’t they try to save their siblings instead of#just random civilians? they played hero and it killed their brother. their brother is playing hero still. maybe being a hero#means having blood on your hands. not like fawn. spotless and clean. a little broken but not unfixable. they’ll fix them :) they’ll Help :)#it takes years to get out. years of watching headline after headline abt sidestep’s exploits. more public now than before.#it hurts to read sidestep’s name. The sidestep. not the sidestepS. doing just fine alone. unlike them.#it is so hard to be upset at their brother. it is so Easy to be upset at their brother. there is a voice in their head that says#horrible things in a voice that is theirs but not theirs (it is cyrus and river and chen and north and heartbreak and-)#but they don’t listen. it would be so easy but they forgive him. they always will. and they’ll help him!#he doesn’t know they’re alive. or maybe he doesn’t care. but he knows abt the farm. he cares abt the farm. and they’ll help him be ready#hero hunter (prepare them) fawn who is doing so out of not self preservation but a fucked up version of love ??#‘​you let me die but I forgive you and will keep you alive’ ?? ‘my blood is on your hands but I will not have yours on mine’ ???#(​we haven’t thought at all abt meeting up w the villain!brother tho lmao)

PEER REVIEWING THESE TAGS FOR MYSELF BECAUSE. HEY. HEY!!!!!!

oh survivor!fawn we are really in it now