#me@22: OH SHit I BEEN gay

[cinnamanz]

— ִ ࣪✮🕷✮⋆˙ DARLING, I .ᐟ ·˚ ༘ MANON BANNERMAN

when new york city’s widely-known spider-woman's life becomes unknowingly entwined with a member of the rising global girl group katseye, she learns that juggling superhero duties, university, and a sudden crush may or may not just be the downfall of her. but hey, at least she's helping people, right?

tags .ᐟ smau, crack, fluff, idol x superhero, unserious awkward losers, coarse language, suggestive themes, university! au, horrible jokes

featuring .ᐟ katseye, itzy, skz, le sserafim

pairing .ᐟ manon bannerman x reader

status .ᐟ completed

notes .ᐟ this smau was made for fun and entertainment. it is not an actual portrayal of the people mentioned in this smau, nor are the photos used to portray y/n. also let's just say that some kpop groups are currently living in nyc. IGNORE THE TIMESTAMPS. divider creds: @/adornedwithlight. TAGLIST CLOSED.

PROFILES!

nightmare blunt rotation brainrotted fine shyts brainrotted fine shyts 2.5

01. YOUR FRIENDLY NEIGHBOURHOOD SPIDER-WOMAN!

02. TOO LIT!

03. CAKE!

04. SWEET MOTHER OF CHRIST!

05. WEDGIES IN A SPANDEX!

06. MAMA A MINION GIRL BEHIND YOU!

07. FREAKY N PROUD!

08. WUH LUH WUH?

09. LOST IN TRANSLATION!

10. STALKER!

11. IT'S A DATE!

12. SICK N TIRED!

13. BOOTS R QUAKING!

14. SO ANXIOUS!

15. AND THE CROWD IS CONFUSED?

16. CANDIDS!

17. NEW YEAR, NEW ME!

18. NEW YEAR, NEW FRUSTRATIONS!

19. FEMALE DJS DO IT BEST!

20. JENNIFER!

21. LAST STRAW!

22. BLOCKED!

23. THIS POST HAS BEEN DELETED!

24. SO COOKED!

25. WHAT DOES IT #MEAN?

26. HEIROGILGER AHH TEXT!

27. QUEEN NEVER CRY!

28. THE TYPE OF GREED THEY TALK ABOUT IN THE BIBLE!

29. EYES ON ME!

30. FINALLY!

31. ONE HELL OF A DATE!

32. HALLELUJAH!

33. TOO GAY TO FUNCTION!

34. EMBARRASSING!

35. BLOCKED PT. 2!

36. THREE WEEKS!

37. SPIDER-WOMAN!

38. APOLOGY GIFT!

39. SALUTATIONS BEAUTIFUL!

40. IDGAF WAR!

41. APOLOGY GIFT PT. 2!

42. BLOCKED PT. 3!

43. SO HELP ME GOD!

44. OH SHIT!

45. LIFE OR DEATH!

46. STUPIDITY!

47. LIZARD THING LIVESTREAM!

48. MOVIE DATE!

49. WOMAN ON A MISSION!

50. SUSPICIONS!

51. GO HOME!

52. THE END!

bonus! incorrect quotes n text messages.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

hi ive been obsessed w fez for the last two weeks and ur fics are the best ones.

i am literally obsessed w u so thank u for helping me w my ‘fez fever’

i live for the fez x reader x (platonic) ash. i love when ash and reader banter and tease eachother 😭

I LOVE UU

I love writing this trope SO MUCH.

"You guys know you could do this anywhere else but here." Ash's deep groan from the other side of the room forces Fez away from me, my lips chasing his as he backs away from me. His hands stabilize me on each side of my hips, my legs hanging off the edge of the counter between us. "Like fucking go make out in the car or some shit." I bite back a giggle at Ash's complaining, watching Fez's cheeks redden in embarrassment and his chest puff in protectiveness.

"Oh, is our love bothering you?" I call out over my shoulder, not needing to see the look on Ash's face to know he's beyond disgusted and beyond annoyed.

"You guys are like fucking rabbits, always making out and shit." I push Fez away from me with a huff, hopping down from the counter so I can peer under the cabinet at Ash who sits in the living room, draped across the loveseat.

"Then leave the room Ash, no one's asking you to hang around." Fez groans, giving me a sorry look as his hand rubs up and down my back.

"It's my goddamn house-"

"And I pay the goddamn bills so I'll kiss my woman where I want." I can't fight the laugh that leaves me this time, Fez's hand slapping over my mouth instantly and Ash gives me a deadly look.

"Boys, seriously. I think I know what's going on." I push Fez away from me and wave my hands between them, stepping away from Fez so I can approach Ash with hands held up, mocking surrender. "I think Ash misses me." I throw a pout his way, reaching out to tug him up from the couch and into my arms.

"Fuck no, get out of here." He scoffs, trying to push me away but he doesn't try hard enough because I just continue to smother him with love, pressing kisses to the top of his head as he whines. "Stop tryna hug me, Y/n."

"C'mere munchkin." I coo and he finally gives up with a huff, patting my back in an exasperated attempt to please my 'insanity'. "I think Ash just needs a hug." Fez chuckles from the doorway, looking between his brother and I with a fond expression.

"You're mean to him." Fez sighs, folding his arms over his chest and I throw him a sassy wink.

"It's good for his character development." Ash finally pushes me away, deciding he's had enough of my love and before he can storm out, I can see the light blush on his cheeks.

Success.

"Fuck character development and fuck both of y'all."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane28282 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi @crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the heart @vampviolets@haylee-e @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife

@officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @witxhy-lexx @minjix @luvroseee @tee-swizzle @savageneversaw @admiringlove @hysteriahall @piceous21 @starlightandfairies @igotmajordaddyissues @drewstarkey-wife1 @manyfandomsfanvergent @revesephemeres @bungunz

[sardar106]

had this in drafts for a while. sleep deprived brain decided to post it now instead of waiting for the anniversary, so

okay— Ash (@thepersonwithoutaname) said before that An Epilogue 2/22 by TE/MO is Icarus coming back home and reflecting on their life and other people’s view on it. and I agree on this a lot but… if you think about it being the anniversary the Cathedral… it’s specifically Icarus in the Worldport during the anniversary of the Cathedral reflecting on their life and what happened

and here’s why and why I shake it so hard (kinda line-by-line analysis (also my first song analysis real?))

A year out from the day And it still feels like yesterday That some part of me died Upon that slab of steel

point one, anniversary of something point two, the memories of it feel so close, they funky as Quixis point three, change that to stone and you got that perfectly

Cuz when you think that you can swim You don't expect the tides to pull you in Especially when you're wading into Rivers ankle deep

Icarus. moving on— (but seriously tho, the whole arc after the Cathedral)

Now I’m hunting my own body A ghost miserable and lost The spirit of that January And everything it cost…

Icarus and hunting? with everything that happened with Haley and then thinking that it happened to Centross and also just being Quixis in general. they’re not like what they used to be. they don’t have their wings. they don’t have their jewelry. they’re just Quixis January? like how the Cathedral was in January? yeah what the Cathedral is and the aftermath of it caused

How I wish I could return to claim The parts of me that burned Oh I was mean at times But least that was a choice

burned?? arson??? parts of them that burned?? yeah. “mean at times” that’s a bit of an understatement, my guy not all of it was their choice, but at least wanting him back was

Ambition's waiting by the door Finally returning from the war But she's been gone so long We can't recall her voice

change war to the stasis chamber Isla was in, it’s after Rae got her out yeah… they already didn’t before becoming Quixis

It's a gold rush fever Panning for the simplest bits of joy

Gold? in this economy? yeah, Icarus because of Fable after Cathedral they tried so hard, went through so much, to bring him back, to be able to bicker and be with him

Oh I used to get things done And honey, Lord help anyone That stood between me and The empires I made

could be about before corruption and stuff you see, I know that line is different, but “honey, Lord”? about Centross. they be gay. he be a god don’t really have anything for the two other lines

Now when shit gets hard I walk And I can't stand it when I start to talk I hate it more than you That I can't put it in a grave

Icarus walking instead of flying because “when shit gets hard” is when the phantom pain in their torso is strong talking in the Worldport just feels weird. especially when there’s no one around they just want to burry all that grief and anger towards Fable but they can’t and they hate that fact

Oh I wish I could return to claim The parts of me that burned Oh I was mean at times But least that was a choice

Ambition's waiting by the door Finally returning from the war But she's been gone so long We can't recall her voice

It's a gold rush fever Panning for the simplest bits of joy

all three same as the first time as they loop their thoughts

Moving on’s a luxury They'll say I can afford But with pockets starved of gold dust Babe, just how can I be sure?

basically flash back in this part they couldn’t move on from Centross’ death but they’ve seen the people around them be okay starved of gold dust? Fable. thinking about what if he doesn’t come back

If time heals every wound But no one mourns the wicked dead Then she'll be trapped forever With each sorry tear she shed

Icarus and Isla. Icarus and Isla. Icarus and Isla wounded by not having her around as a child they’e the wicked dead. just, no more words she was trapped for eternity she. just Isla. she’s so sad about not being there for her kids

Bodies they remember What the mind tries to forget Bodies they remember What the heart saw as a threat

My body it remembers What the mind tries to forget My body still remembers What my heart saw as a threat

the understand that. they understand that and they know it’s happening to everyone in the universe. but if we call back the first verse with it being the anniversary, their body freaking out when it hits the day

Wish I could return to claim The parts of me that burned Oh I was mean at times At least I made a choice

we’ve been over the first part. but the last line at least they made a choice. their choice in the Finale

Ambition's waiting by the door Finally returning from the war But she's been gone so long We can't recall like anything at this point

the last line again first they said they don’t remember her voice but they didn’t remember anything about her Rae did. he told them. but it was never their memories

How I wish I could return to claim The parts of me that burned Oh I was mean at times At least I wasn’t gone

yeah. yeah. at least they didn’t die in the cave it sucks a lot that they had to go and put everyone through that but if Fable got the portal, went in the Worldport and took Midas’ powers, things would’ve been much more fucked

Ambition's waiting by the door Finally returning from the war But she's been gone so long We’ve learnt to carry on…

they’ve learnt to carry on cuz they had to they had to live without her they had to live not just that, they forgot her. they carried on, in a sense

It's a gold rush fever Panning for a reason to be strong

they have to be strong all the universes are carried by their hands they can’t mess up they have to focus

Somehow it feels like this is only the beginning… But I guess that means I'm getting better, doesn't it? With how much the body remembers Healing is not linear… But we find a start in the end and Go from there

this part. oh, this part. it’s spoken, not sung. emotions are controlled, they are done with it all they’re Quixis and it’s been a year since the Cathedral. it’s a new beginning new beginnings means getting better the body remembers, the mind not as much, healing has ups and downs, there’s not a solid way to predict it just, yeah

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 48

chapter 74:

1. NOT SIRIUS TELLING REMUS TO FUCK HIM AND THEN FINDING OUT HIS DAD IS ON THE PHONE. ID DIE- 💀💀

2. not remus going from: FUCK ME PLEASE to never touch me again, i am unworthy and but an evil temptress

he just went from one shade of dramatic to the next

3. “Remus likes that he can leave doors open and come and go as he pleases. He likes that he can just randomly take a walk whenever he wants, going anywhere and as far as he wants to, hearing the birds sing and letting his new home leave a lasting imprint in his mind, taking shape, something to settle in. He likes that he has the freedom to do anything, and really, all he ever wants to do is just—exist. Just be”

crying when i literally have an exam tomorrow at eight am. 💃🏼💃🏼💃🏼

4. wolfstar is living my dream. i can’t even begin to tell you. they’re living my dream. i’m so unwell knowing that they get everything i want. i’ve never wanted to be sirius more in my life at this point

5. BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHA SIRIUS PROPOSES WITH A SPOON i- that’s the faggotiest thing i’ve ever seen

6. awwwwwwwww remus said yes!! this is the cutest proposal i have ever seen in my life

7. they.. they are making out on the dirt ground of the market surrounded by people

8. “"Was it at least a nice spoon?"

"Worst spoon I've ever seen."”

LMAOOO

9. god i love sapphics. lily has the most dramatic proposal planned for mary. i love lily

10. awwww lily’s gonna have a baby with mary sometime in the near future. they have their own little family!!! i get so happy thinking about it

11. “In Alice's story, he may be the villain, but in his? In his, there was no villain, just pain, and now peace.” yes yes yes YES

12. awww it’s both sad that sirius leaves his mind during his wedding but also so sweet that remus stops the wedding so sirius can remember every bit of it

13. i cried at how happy sirius was to find out that remus waited for him at their wedding

14. pandora has no shame oh my god

15. but also!!!! canon polyam couple 💃🏼💃🏼

16. FHSHDJSJSKJDKDKSJKSKD REMUS AND SIRIUS ARE GONNA BE FOSTER PARENTS OH MY GOD

17. remus being there for lily during the pregnancy test is so special to me. what if i gnawed plastic or mulch or chomped glass? huh? huh???

18. holy shit. regulus babysits for one afternoon and suddenly he’s adopted two more kids. jesus he works fast

19. HARRY!!

20. domestic jegulus raising kids!!!!!!!!!! AND LILY ISNT SURROGATE!! SHES RAISING HARRY WITH MARY!!! 💃🏼💃🏼💃🏼

21. oh gosh they’re gonna adopt teddy, huh? i can’t wait for this oh my god

22. uhhh i was so invested in the story that i literally don’t have anything else to say about the end of this chapter. i was so fixated on this i swear

chapter 75: FINAL ONE OMG

1. remus is being so gay over sirius in a dress. and bud, me too. me toooo

2. “”You want to know something?"

"What?"

Regulus watches the rain come down, his lips still curled up as he murmurs, "I would have volunteered for you, too."”

i’m crying so bad over here. tbh i think my period is about to begin because i also cried over the episode in my little pony where they all tell the stories of how they got their cutie marks and then the mane six find out they were all connected by rainbow dashes sonic rain boom.

3. i finally recovered then got emotional over the horcrux hornet

4. shdjsjjsjsjs the hat made a full circle

5. EVAN!!! look every time i forget about him, his presence comes back to smack me in the face and hurt me

6. 😟 that’s it? i’m done? i’ve been reading this for months, and i finally finished. i feel both so completed and so very incomplete.

7. it’s over. huh. it’s really over. well. yeah.

[whysojiminimnida]

Remember When I Said Taehyung Might Not Be As Gay As We Thought?

Don't judge a man by his milfy wardrobe, he looks goooood.

It was... awhile ago. Maybe as far back as 2021 although I do not feel like link-searching it. It's in the archives if I didn't kill it.

Granted, there was a lot going on, then. There's still a lot going on and until now I had no desire to ever - EVER - return to this hellsite. Because Taekookers are fucking weird, yo. And some of y'all got a lil bit up in my shit too as I (fuzzily) recall. Which: it's whatever. I'm extremely unsocial, don't even answer my own DMs. And it's not personal, so I get it. I don't need or want to defend myself, but I will protect people I care about. With my absence, if necessary.

OT: I also totally kicked the big C while I've been out so that was nice. Yoongi the cat is pleased that his noms will continue uninterrupted. I will be in wigs for at least another year. It's all good. Oh LOOK at what we have here. Don't come at me for publishing this, I will explain.

I got it from actual media days ago, okay, and also: there was no expectation of real privacy. Keep reading. Or don't, I'm not telling you what to do.

ANYWAY. I had to come back, mainly to say TAENNIE IS REAL I TOLD Y'ALL IDK WHY NOBODY EVER BELIEVES ME BUT HERE WE ARE. I'm gloating. Honestly, it's so rude, I'd apologize if I cared. But I am rude and snorfling into my cheerios about this. Tae just made me so damn happy, is all.

LET THE MAN BE BI OR HETEROFLEXIBLE OR EVEN STRAIGHT IDC. Jennie clearly makes him happy. Look at his "I'm going to Paris to see my girlfriend" face!

And in that very specific jewelry look, no less. Foundrae. Again. Still. Hm.

Here's what I can tell you based on my limited third hand no sources no receipts this is probably utter bullshit usual disclaimer: It's a soft open, kids. This whole "oopsie we just so happened to get caught taking a lil walk in public with our managers in tow during which date at least one of us signed several autographs, what a surprise" is in fact a soft open for what will likely be a public confirmation PRETTY DAMN SOON. It might happen before I get this thing published, actually, depending on when I get it up. If it's before May 22 at noon my time, no idea. If after, well. Guess we'll see. Jennie's supposed to show up at the screening of HBO's The Idol that day, screening at the Grand Lumiere at 10:30 CEST. One wonders if she will arrive alone, or bring a plus one. It's a big ask, and if he does it they're probably getting married, that's how big a deal it would be. So I'm not holding my breath, but.

This seems like a reasonable prospect for a plus-one viewing. Might not be the only one but... Jennie's IN IT so.

I'M NOT SAYING THIS IS GONNA HAPPEN. I think it would be a fucking POWER move if it did, but I also do not necessarily expect that it will. It COULD. It... MIGHT. It might not. Either way they're a thing, I'm telling you. They are, have been, a thing. For awhile. And it is apparently quite serious - like up to and including talk of engagement serious.

Remember when a bunch of folk thought that one gummy bear dude was going to jail for "hacking" Jennie's phone only there's been no actual movement on any "investigation"? Yeah. Trickle truthing, they call it. Give 'em a little bit, let them deny it and yell and chew on it for awhile before you give 'em a little more. But c'mon, nobody's wearing half the love-themed couple pieces at Foundrae for no damn reason.

Seriously they got the whole collection almost and both have been seen wearing them almost exclusively. For a year.See airport pic above.

Look, I don't have inside info on Taehyung. I do not. I ain't hang with his friends and I don't know him personally. Never met the guy. But I know a PR move when I see one and this is exactly that.

We all know how toxic stan culture can be. Some ToadlicKKers (and a few of us house elves) are certifiably bonkers, if stan twitter is anything to go by. And the guys, the company, they expect a whole meltdown. They know this is not gonna make half their fans happy. I mean the tkkers have a point in that it looks like they wanted to be seen. BECAUSE IT'S A SOFT OPEN. What Taejen/Taennie/Jenhyung and the companies also know is that based on historic shipper behavior, this is gonna come back on Jimin, Jungkook, maybe Rose' and Lisa. And by extension, the other members. Maybe not as much due to their respective distance, but still. I bet by the time I finish this it will have already started.

Oh look there it is. Fuck those bitches, really.

Good LORDT. I'm not adding the audio, if y'all are that hungry for psycho hose beast Jimin hate hie thee to stan twt.

But, totally off-topic kinda...

... wouldn't it be cool if Jennie, who speaks great English, was hanging out with Troye Sivan and was like "so you know my boyfriend tells me that his bffs..." I'M JUST SAYING NETWORKING IS COOL AND FRIENDS OF FRIENDS GET THINGS DONE OKAY.

You know that girl has the scoop. If Tae knows it, she knows it. Oh heeeeyyy Troye.

Also OT: I love that Taekook have been hanging out a little more lately. It's refreshing. I genuinely think having Jennie in his life has been good for Tae in several ways. And you know, I'm kinda surprised Taennie has lasted this long. I didn't honestly think they would. It warms my decrepit, sad old heart a bit. Turns out I have a lot more to say so IDK IDK, if I feel okay about it I might be back. Right now I'm just waiting for the official Taennie nod and the continued total meltdown.

[ellsieee]

Stay With Me didn't let us down! 😭 We got kisses and a confession. There is no way anyone can say it's not a BL now. 🙄 Not that there was any doubt even before that. The subtext was just too obvious.

I can't believe they went there. Super sleuths have already found that it really is just lip balm, but the implication is clearly that Wu Bi's dad found his lube. Wu Bi why did you do your dad dirty like that? Don't smear your lube on his mouth! 🤣

Wu Bi was about to confess but he chickened out. 😅 Shy Wu Bi is so cute. Wu Bi really can't live without Su Yu. He had never been that bitchy and rude to Mo Yi before, but now there's someone at home he wants to be with and has no time for Mo Yi's shit.

First almost caught by Wu Bi's dad and now Mao Chong. Su Yu's nervous shifty eyes cracked me up. We all know he and Wu Bi have been doing something something in his room.

They are so happy to see each other!😭Their smiles. Really, I can't. I love how much they love each other. I could not stop smiling watching them hug.

Oh how I squealed. THEY ARE SO FRIGGIN CUTE!!! AHHHHHHH! This might literally be my favorite moment in the entire series.

"Go cough somewhere else" lol. Poor Mo Yi. Right in front of his salad.

Su Yu's little smile is EVERYTHING. I feel like we're missing a scene before this though. It just seems a bit out of place that Wu Bi would run up to kiss Su Yu at school and for Su Yu to not be surprised or embarrassed. I'm counting on that uncut release later. Actually I felt like the editing for these two eps was a bit choppy. I'm going to guess it's because they cut a bunch of stuff because it was too gay.

I love all the subtle ways they show us they're boyfriends. Su Yu casually using Wu Bi as a leg rest, Wu Bi teasing Su Yu about him not knowing he's Wu Bi's most important person, Su Yu taking care of Wu Bi, and Wu Bi making not so subtle hints about their relationship in front of everyone. Why always in front of Doudou? Always! 😅

The normally aloof Su Yu kissed Wu Bi! Again it's Su Yu's little smile after the kiss that makes it so sweet. The spoilers were actually true! I didn't think this would happen because in the behind the scenes Jiongmin had said there was no scene where he kisses Xu Bin, but here we are! Xu Bin's dream has finally come true. 🤭

I was not expecting such an explicit confession! They tried to hide the gay a little by having Su Yu add the ocean part, but Wu Bi's qq screen name is 我想我是海 (I wish I am the sea) and so when Su Yu shouts 我爱你, 大海 (I love you sea), he is not so subtly telling Wu Bi that he loves him. Awwwww. ​​​🥹

But also, I have to drag production a bit on the terrible green screen CGI here. It looks so fake! Did they run out of money? How hard is it to film a sunset at a beach?

No. Don't you dare Mo Yi. Fuck off. If the last two eps break my heart I'm going to consider SWM as having only 22 episodes where the boys are together and happy.

The girls on weibo only went a little crazy. I didn't see SWM on the main hot search but they were trending for a little while. Hopefully it was short enough where it didn't draw too much attention. 😅

[idkwhatever580]

Agatha All Along Commentary

⚠️WARNING⚠️ AGATHA ALL ALONG 1x6 SPOILERS AHEAD

you’ve been warned

Im late again guys 😣 alright. Here goes nothing. I’m seriously considering taking my anxiety meds before these episodes because atp that might help.

Started watching at 3:00 pm

I stg I stg I stg I stg if this turns out bad I’m gonna throw up. And that says a lot considering I have emetophobia

Ooh fancy he’s Jewish

I’m not familiar with the Jewish religion but seems pretty cool.

Okay so we have established that this is Billy Kaplan which idk how y’all dug so deep to figure it out but I guess it was common knowledge and I do not have common knowledge so it adds up

Ooh now there’s a party funnn lol

I wish I had parents that were proud of me

Lmaooooo “you’re both disgusting” is so fucking real

4:25

ARIANA WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???

She’s kinda hot guys. I have daddy issues but I’m a lesbian lmaoooo

5:14

WTFFFF I CANT DO THIS SHIT I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS BUT SHES TOTALLY LYING TO HIM IN THIS

5:42

wtf does the tower reversed mean bitch

6:14

Hearing her say baby is so fucking hot I’m gonna nut everywhere

Oh lord guys I seriously have problems… but don’t say you weren’t thinking it too 😏

6:51

WTF IS THAT THING A PROTECTION SPELL OR WHAT?!?!

DID SHE PLACE THE SIGIL?!?!

Omg if she placed the sigil on him that would be insane

7:46

If y’all out there with the theories about Billy maximoff’s soul taking over Billy kaplan’s body im kms because that’s so valid

——id like to let y’all know that I know nothing about the marvel comics and I do not intend on learning or digging that deep kk? I also don’t know what Wiccan is but I guess it’s Billy maximoff? Not looking for someone to explain it tho lol——

IM SCARED J DONT WANNA SEE MY BABY

NO WANDA NO WANDA I DIDNT NEED TO HEAR HER VOICE

8:34

Holy shit.

8:39

Watching it disappear is so sad. Like I know she’s hurting and saving the rest of them

9:00

OH MY GOD THE PARENTS STAYED ALIVE I THOUGHT YALL SAID THEY ALL DIED OR LIKE TWO DEATHS

9:33

NO FUCKING WAY THIS SHIT IS ACTUALLY TRUE

Y’all playing too hard

9:52

No fucking way. I’m actually so done right now. I’m so fucking done I need to scream at someone and it needs to be the fucking producer

10:15

That must be so fucking scary to go to “sleep” as Billy Maximoff and wake up in someone else’s body. Like in Disney shows when they switch and shit they have a moment where they look in the mirror and scream but this is def more realistic

Also I thought someone said there were two deaths. I don’t see no dead people up in this bitch

10:55

wtf is this?? inside out?

11:06

Noooohohohoooooo I forgot that Billy M can mind read and shit

12:33

That dog knows

Why is it always the dog that knows?

13:44

Having to call her mom must have sucked balls

15:22

Damn he already trying to fit the part bro. Moving on too damn fast

Him and his mom with the lying bro ✋🙄

Stop I sound like Agatha 😭

16:02

SHE DID PLACE THE SIGIL ON HIM WTFFFF

16:26

Okay I see you little emo gay kid having more piercings than me and having kissed more people than me and I’m older than you 🙄

17:26

Damn that’s crazy. He actually is telling this dude his shit

18:40

Damn that’s so fucking crazy his smile is creeping me out bro

Also I totally knew little Billy M was meant to be a little gay baby

19:24

Damnit all of these hoes have connection with him. Of some kind

19:57

You found a guy on Reddit. And you’re meeting him? That sounds like you’re getting killed.

OMG WHO IS IT TELL ME WHO IT IS

ITS RALPH NO ITS RALPH POOR RANDALL SORRY RANDALL ITS JUST WE KNOW YOU AS RALPH

21:06

Damn he went kinda crazy from being with Agatha all that time huh? That means the only one that can handle her is rioooooo

21:42

Don’t take my wife’s name in vain hoe

lol I’m kidding

I also apparently have multiple wives

Lmaoooo please ask about Agatha harkness

24:06

YOU FUCKING MURDERED SPARKY I WILL NEVER EVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS I DONT CARE IF SHE MADE YOU DO THAT SHIT I HATE YOU

24:19

Omg I can’t do this shit

Does this mean that Tommy is also in someone’s body?

25:27

I seriously do wanna know what kind of crazy that lady eats for breakfast. And I hope it’s me 😏

26:24

Yeaaaahhhh this song eats me up.

27:20

HOHOHOHHHHH THAT PICTURE IS THE IMAGE OF A FA- a gay woman. A gay witchy woman…. 👀

27:36

OH YEAH THEY BROUGHT MY GIRL DOLLY INTO IT

DOLLY PARTON FOR PRESIDENT 2024

Ahem… excuse my political views ✋😭

28:20

Omg omg omg he’s going on the road to find Tommy I’m gonna cryyyyy

29:43

Oh he’s so emo with his eyeliner and his black heart boyfriend and his belt chain and his witchy witchyness

…okay maybe im jealous

29:55

Ugh mommy. They’re both so hot. I know we only see Agatha in this part but I’ll nut to the thought of Aubrey Plaza

30:06

You’re seriously using a fucking house lamp you idiot ✋😭

30:29

You tell me to stop I’ll do it mommy

OH LAWD I HAVE ISSUES

I have to shit bro 😭

31:07

Hooligan is so fucking funny 😭

31:33

Guys I’m nutting everywhere from her sitting like that she’s soooo gayyyyyy

The producer really said “gay” and Kathryn Hahn said “yes”

32:16

I think if I was in that situation as teen, I’d say I want to. I want to poke that damn bear and see if she’ll throw me on the desk and- oh. Right right. Not the point ✋😭😏

I ALSO JUST REALIZED THAT SHE IS WEARING A SHIRT THAT IS RALPHS RANDALLS? Idk anymore bro

32:59

Wait… this is so fucking funny bro 😭😭😭

33:45

OMG SHES LIKE IN THE INTERROGATION TABLE AND ITS ACTUALLY HER HOUSE BRO

I NEVER MADE THAT CONNECTION 😭😭😭

34:21

HOT HOOOTTTTT SHES SO HOT RIPPING THAT TAPE IS SO HOT

34:28

THATS SO FUCKING FUNNY BRO

34:46

Hold on these side swipe things are going too fast I’m so lost. 😭 I hate having a horrible memory that makes me not be able to remember every single detail when we’re going back to something from a different pov

35:10

STFU SHE COULDNT HEAR EITHER TIME AND BOTH TIMES HE SAID SOMETHING DIFFERENT I WONDER WHAT HE SAID ON THE ROAD WITH THE OTHER WITCHES

35:19

YEEESSSSS IM SK GLAD WERE BACK TO THE ROAD

35:28

Yes! Pull yourself out of that mystery goop!!!

36:11

FUCK YOU BITCH FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU DONT BREAK THE SIGIL PIECE FUCK YOU

37:53

Wait. I am so gullible I like her being nice bro ✋😭

38:00

COVERED IN MYSTERIOUS ROAD GOOP OR NOT THAT POSE IS FUCKIGN HOT

38:09

I can’t tell if she’s crying because she’s happy the SIGIL is broken and she’s right or if she’s crying because she actually liked the kid

38:33

FUCK SHES BEING EVIL AGAIN I NEED A GOOD AGATHA AND I KNOW IM NOT GETTING THAT BUT A GIRL CAN DREAM

38:45

I’ll kill someone for you Agatha

39:05

Wait when she’s like don’t feel guilty about your talent I feel like she’s trying to be evil but it’s kind of endearing. Like. Shes so strong about it which means so many witches have felt guilty about their talents before and she doesn’t want that to hinder him. Even if she is evil that’s pretty sweet.

39:53

OH FUCK YOU BITCH KYS KYS HAHA THATS WHY YOU CANT USE YOUR POWERS BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO BE GOOD GOOD NOT DECENT GOOD

40:43

Stfu Agatha. Don’t mess with our bitch.

Robo papa? BAHAHAHAHAHAAA

she knowsssss

41:34

BAHAHAHHAAHAAAAA

42:02

“Got it” not her being serious for once ✋😭

42:25

DONT I KNOW IT BITCH YOU DIDNT HAVE TO TELL ME IM WATXHING YOU LITTLE MAXIMOFF BITCH

Post watching notes:

I seriously needed some Agathario shit and I didn’t get that and I’m mad. IM SO MAD THAT THE INTIMACY COORDINATOR WAS FOR TEO LITTLE BOYS I NEEDED MY MIDDLE AGE WOMEN TO MAKE TF OUT THEY ARE TEASING ME 😖😖😖

[im-out-of-it]

season 1, episode 11 “blood calls to blood”

aka guess who are “siblings” 💀

1. it’s almost funny that Valentine tricks jace this way. like jace thinks it’s his father and he’s so happy but all Valentine is doing is taunting jace and tricking them just so he can have the cup. just like Alec predicted lmao

2. you don’t have to heal jace. you can let him die. we would all be better off

3. I know I post a lot of anti jace stuff but if the writing actually had him being held accountable and he was a decent person, I could get on board. but I can’t. he’s insufferable, toxic, and self involved

4. well, we are back with Alec and Izzy. one shadowhunter trial about to come up 👏🏼

5. “I can’t find jace because I weakened our bond”- yes Alec did weaken it but let’s not just put it all on Alec. parabatai are supposed to have each others back and I haven’t seen jace do that for Alec at all. anytime Alec needs him, jace isn’t there. we don’t know their relationship before episode 1 so maybe he was there but knowing jace, I fucking doubt it lmao

6. “what am I supposed to do, sit here and play solitaire while they find something else to blame me for?”- Izzy. I’m just surprised she knows what that game is 😭 but honestly it’s kind of messed up that clary and Jace got to run off with the mortal cup while Izzy is here almost about to lose her being a shadowhunter. it’s not fair at all. and I think the treatment of jace and clary vs Alec and Izzy is something that doesn’t get discussed much. they hardly are held accountable for anything. they’ve ran off and who is to blame? ALEC. Izzy may have had a hand in helping meliorn but she didn’t do it alone so why is Izzy the one paying the consequences?

7. literally jace could go out and kill a bunch of downworlders and say they attacked me first! and he still would be fine. oh because jace is supposedly the best of us all except he always needs rescuing. Alec has paid the price for so many of jace’s actions.

8. “Izzy, I’m your big brother, please let me help you”-Alec 😭

9. I love that Simon has people helping him out. Luke in season one, Magnus in season two. Magnus had to deal with being a warlock all on his own. Luke had Jocelyn but no one should have to go through their changes on their own ☹️

10. LET JACE DIE! LET JACE DIE! LET JACE DIE!

11. I know Raphael is asexual but I would have been 100% okay with a Raphael and Simon pairing. THEY HAVE CHEMISTRY

12. but I love the importance of the showing making representation matter. we have Magnus who is bisexual, alec is gay, Raphael is asexual, and I can’t think of her name but that officer in season three who is a lesbian as well as aline and Helen. so nice to see 🥹

13. “Funny how those rules for downworlders stop being such a big deal when you need our help.”-ok Raphael tell her off 🔥 literally, what I have been talking about!!!! shadowhunters can break the accords = it’s okay! downworlders breaking accords = they’re evil and must be executed and punished!

14. having Camille only being on the show as temporary was a mistake in my opinion. I’m not saying she needed to be there the whole time but I think she’s a very underrated character who could’ve been more. she didn’t have one entire scene in all of season one that was terrible

15. ah blackmailing, how original

16. how I feel everytime jace gets away with something lmao (I always try to do shadowhunter gifs but I couldn’t resist)

17. Raphael: blackmailing me? how unkind, now stick around new advisor 🥲 raphael doesn’t play any games

18. ah, inquisitor herondale. what a cold bitch she is

19. well jace lives so yay I guess?

20. “this is real clary”-jace. ugh not them putting their whole mouths all over each and making cringe facial expressions 🤢

21. not sorry, I find them so cringe

22. ah, Valentine being Michael wayland being highly suspicious (shit I hope I didn’t ruin this for anyone, SORRY)

23. I love how “Valentine” sees jace following whatever clary says and is thinking hmmmm interesting

24. Izzy is all like if Jocelyn can be on the run then I can, but she had runes and weapons and Luke for starters so it’s not like Jocelyn was alone

okay so this isn’t going to be in order and this post will be more than likely go towards the trial 😌

45. I love the way alec says done and he just stares at Magnus like this man is going to take me for all I’m worth and I’m going to be happy about it 😭

46. the struggle is real for alec because not only is he denying a man who he is most likely having feelings for but he has have the audacity to go back to that same man 😬 and literally ask him for help while also trying to fight his feelings

47. like it’s just got to be hard for alec to be around magnus. I know he’s gay, we know he’s gay, literally the whole world knows he’s gay but alec doesn’t feel comfortable being gay in the shadow world. this is more of an assumption on my part when it comes to Alec. because he’s never dated and we see him “secretly” eyeing other men. which he is rightly validated in because the shadowhunters (more clave) are such oppressive ass judgmental prejudicial dicks who would rather control a being to their mold than have someone be comfortable in who they wish to be. they have this my way or no way thinking of how a shadowhunter should act and be

48. and the show doesn’t really touch up often on what it means to be gay in the shadow world or just different (I mean the books barely did and I would rather cc stay away from all matters because she burns everything she touches so no thanks)

49. also can we talk about how fucking gorgeous Magnus is???????

50. HE KNOWS HE IS FINE AS HELL

51. like how is Alec not drooling over him?????? man he’s got to be using every strength to hold it in and fight it 😭

52. also kind of funny how we’re introduced as jace being the one without emotions and clary as the emotional feeling one and the fact that clary is the one ending valentines reign, and Jace can never handle it

53. I sympathize with Jace losing his parents and having a messed up childhood but I don’t sympathize with someone who has this and uses excuses to be a shitty person. I’m sorry but I never once saw a change in either jace or clary in the show or the books.

54. “You don’t trust Alec so clary means more to you.”- “Michael wayland” ayyyyyy isn’t this what I have been saying this whole time????? dude is reading my mind I swear

55. and now he’s trying to act as though he trusts Alec. “Valentine” is right about something. he has put clary first since she arrived and Alec last. fucking Izzy is about to get deruned and jace and clary are out here basically having the time of their life. I know it’s an exaggeration but what did they think would happen after they saved meliorn????

56. MAGNUS THE LAWYER IS HERE

57. HES IN A SUIT AND TIE ALL READY TO FIGHT FOR THE LOVE OF HIS LIFES SIS AND HE IS ABSOLUTELY THE HOTTEST PERSON IN THE ROOM!!!!!!!!! this is who I need to represent me at any time!!!

58. Magnus: excuse me, your honor but this bitch is irritating the fuck out of me (magnus having to be near Lydia lmao)

okay, so part 3 coming soon 🥰✨

[3terna15unshin3]

Then Because She Goes

Instagram AU (volume ii)

volume i — back to masterlist — volume iii

a/n: These are far too fun make lmfao so expect more in the future maybe no promises tho

—

trumanblack

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trumanblack Tell me you like my hair or else

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1975adam Covid crazies at its finest

_fake_nudes_ sickkkkkk

este.manansala 2013 you wore it better

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↳ trumanblack You love it

-- ↳ este.manansala K fine u look fit

whatashaaame i like it ..? i think?

19 April, 2020

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este.manansala

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este.manansala a studio-matty pic on main since Notes is out today✨ it is without a doubt the1975’s best work and well worth the wait

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softsoundd_ Fav song???

↳ este.manansala tough to pick but probably Then Because She Goes or Me & You Together Song :)) or Jesus Christ bc i’m a _fake_nudes_ stan

-- ↳ trumanblack Good taste👍

jamieoborne ❤️

22 May, 2020

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28 May, 2020

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trumanblack

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trumanblack Fuuuuck I miss being on stage💔 but happy pride, my girlfriend is bi so does she deserve rights yes or no?? Comment below👇👇👇

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_catekeeling no none of that gay shit

↳ g3orgiaheadley Agreed x

parisagain GIRLFRIEND........????????

↳ elsie.ahmed babe this is old news where have u been

-- ↳ parisagain Omg fr?😭😭

---- ↳ elsie.ahmed yeah literally i've been following her since he reposted a pic of hers in like Jan of last year💀💀 they're really cute

este.manansala Drop the f slur again like in Roadkill. As a gift to me and the gays

↳ trumanblack Yo chill wtf

2 June, 2020

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7 June, 2020

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trumanblack Getting healthy so I can be more toxic

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este.manansala Stop bragging about the fact that you've read Infinite Jest

↳ trumanblack Well have u read it???? No

este.manansala cute pic tho very wholesome & Pinterest

↳ trumanblack Thank u love u

11 July, 2020

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este.manansala currently streaming folklore as u all should be as well ! but not my tears ricochet bc that's MY song...

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loveitifwemaadeit_ sooooo gorgeous wow

trumanblack Holy shit

trumanblack How are u real

trumanblack Give me a fucking break

↳ este.manansala are u saying I should delete ?

-- ↳ trumanblack I mean if u do I've still got the real thing so

_catekeeling goddess xx

↳ este.manansala I miss uuuuuuu call me !!!!!!!

25 July, 2020

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trumanblack If low rise jeans are rlly coming back here's a pic of me wearing them last year so that u know I was ahead of the trend

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este.manansala Hi x

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poesiedanslarue Oh the hip tatt wow

bedforddanes75 Gay

20 September, 2020

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este.manansala This weekend

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trumanblack God what’s with my hair

↳ este.manansala u literally made it that way

9 November, 2020

[kawaiibarty]

my favourite fics (or fics that i remember at all)

ive been a fandom collector since i was 12 so this is basically just me trying to remember my favourite ones in... no particular order.

major exposure time:

whatsapp - yuri on ice, text fic. wattpad 100+ chapters. victuuri, otayuri, emickey, basically all of them are gay and highschool students in a gc. it made me giggle shut up

the pakhan's jewel - yuri on ice. ao3. completed, 150k words, 23 chapters. abo with alpha victor and omega yuri. arranged marriage. super smutty uhm shut up i was literally only a kid

kill your darlings - harry potter marauders. ao3, completed 303k words, 28 chapters. college au. angsty asf but not the worst, trust. jegulus, wolfstar, rosekiller

a brief history of dragons - the only fic to ever exist. ao3. 23k words, 3 chapters. completed. wolfstar. just...wolfstar. it's so good please go read it

nights after dreams - oh boy...where do i begin???? i was there since the beginning. like. you don't get it chat. 2.5 MILLION WORDS, 754 CHAPTERS, fucking ONGOING. longhaul victuuri carrying on after season 1. angst and happy and happy and angst and uGH SO FUCKING GOOD. mature rating ig

way down we go - beautiful drarry fic. werewolf harry. after the war. setting: america. ao3, completed, 109k words, 29 chapters. almost everyone is gay. lookin at you romione.

dear your holiness - fleabag vibes galore. priest remus lupin. need i say more. completed. ao3, 140k words, 12 chapters. oh it's also a band au. smutty.

blackbird - first ever drarry fic, i think. absolutely amazing. werewolf harry again. i don't remember if there's smut. WATTPAD, completed, 22 chapters. (the writer's other shit is also very good so give their profile a looksie‼️)

four to the end (series) - long haul series of the marauders through their years at hogwarts. remus pov. ongoing (book three is currently underway with a regular posting schedule). each book is about 600—700k words

only the young - jegulus, read my daughter's fic rn. deaf!regulus, coda james. need i fuckin say more???? ongoing.

bare my heart to the stars in paris - i uhm...oh...well uh yeah. it's like that sometimes. victuuri. omegaverse...ao3 type shit yk. incomplete. most likely abandoned but yeah. super smutty. a lot of smutty.

blackbird - TW WORLD WAR 2 so expect all the shit that comes with that. victuuri, completed 107k words. 7 chapters.

where the cliff meets the sea - victuuri, pirates au. explicit. ao3. again tw for many things involving that period, such as racism and homophobia

clandestine - never ever in my life cried for a fic before. anyway. jegulus. slow burn. regulus pov. trans reg. tw for a lot of internalised and external homophobia/transphobia. 142k words. completed. 47 chapters.

dragon prince and winter swan - a song of ice and fire au, victuuri, slow burn. 121k words. completed.

twist of fate - drarry, 302k words, completed, memory loss fic. fic is from 2012 chat holy camoli. super angst. 4th year type shizzle.

astra inclinant - now i know we love scorbus bUt. i raise you scorpius x james sirius. come onnnn tell me you're not tempted by best friends brother AGAIN lolz anyway it says 37/38 but im pretty sure its finished (i havent finished reading it myself but alas) 336k words yorh my bruh.

blackberry jam - wattpad fanfiction, drarry. 46 parts SO FUCKING GOOD

flowershop boy - a fucking wattpad drarry classic folks. freckled draco for life dawg

TEXT TALK ISSNXKDNSJNXJDDN WOLFSTAR DJENDKFMDMDK

beneath a big blue sky - wolfstar, side jily. ao3 completed. 10 chapters.

zanko - FUCKING BEAUTIFUL 1OOk words, 16/16, victuuri. edo period historical yup yup

um...reblog with updates???? idk

[catwouthats]

I’m watching The Gay Deceivers. Will give live updates on this post as I edit it.

00:00:58 Starting off Strong with that green screen college tho-

00:01:08 That hat is slay.

00:04:30 aw they have been together since grade school

00:05:27 ish He’s like “I KNOW WHAT YOU AREEEE” once he s

00:05:40 This editing is amazing

00:06:50 OMG THE CENSORSHIP LMAOO

00:07:50 ish “DO YOU MIND IF I KEEP IT I DONT HAVE THIS ONE AT HOME” oh my GOSHHHHHH lmaooooo

00:11:00 Fellas, is it gay to keep on pretending to be gay and to heavily check out your homies when you DONT have too??

00:12:58 Okay but she is SLAYINGGG with that outfit

00:16:20 they are so sick of this shit lol. The gay agenda isn’t the internet, it’s the complexities of war.

00:17:33 THAT BLONDE ONE IS DEFINITELY BISEXUAL I COULD TELL FROM THE BEGINNING

00:19:12 one bedroom troupe but make it gay. Blonde guy is having a bisexual panic over having to share the bed.

00:22:36 He’s dropping so many hints that he wants to be kissed

I love the fake dating trope

00:23:56 I love this gay actor sm

00:24:45 “We’re newly weds..” AH BRO IS SO BISEXUAL ISTG

00:27:05 “Probably have it bugged” you’re just saying that so he kisses you Eliot

00:31:00 THE LANDLORD IS SO NICE??

“I bet he cooks better than you do?” And than he gets jealous, goes downstairs, watches him cook, than is like “shit he is a good cook but he definitely wants us!” Eliot I see you giggling when no one is watching. You’re not slick.

00:35:39 DANNY IS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFEEE RN

00:37:15 they way I’m panicking with Danny rn…

Okay but why is Danny’s sister homophobic lowkey 💀

00:51:31 oop he caught his bf

00:52:18 so… are you asking him to pay you back in the same way he was gonna pay back her?… bc bro…

01:03:42 why are so many of the girls in this film homophobic??? Acting like gay men are zoo animals to be gauked at and mocked… damn.

01:05:29 uh oh… it’s starting to click for her… she thinks their gay…

They may have girl bossed a little too close to the sun

01:07:25 ooooh… damn they are blaming Danny rn…

01:08:57 Them calling Superman Camp is so real

01:13:58 NO WAY…. No way… omg… bro is too in love with bro to be thinking of anyone else (it’s that or he’s too stressed about the possibility of getting drafted)

01:15:14 NOT ELIOT TRYING TO CHEER UP HIS BF

01:16:30 well Eliot is definitely having fun with the queer lifestyle now…

01:22:55 okay she’s not so homophobic she’s just confused.

Side note: Eliot being a little transphobic has me a little mad, but ofc that would happen bc he’s not used to the queer community.

01:28:30 they girlbossed WAYY too close to the sun…

01:29:55 NAW NOT THAT PLOT TWIST LMAOOOOOOOOO

[alexanderflowerbird]

DAY 22

Hey! I'm alive! I'm here! And I'm writing! Haha! Woof, my real life has been an interesting blur of work, sister time, friend time, caring for my polycule, husband time, ARCANE, and of course, writing. I have excellent news to report-- my goal for the month was to produce 30K words and GUESS WHAT. YA BOI HAS DONE IT. Even more than that, cuz of COURSE I'm gonna keep going. The writing group had a sprint night where many of us got together to do sprints, and I got so many little scenes done that I'm very excited about lol I got gators that jump like flying fish, I got the Seneca Beast being a fucking nightmare and nuisance, I got Dolcezza and Malachi finally kissing and admitting they like each other [Dolcezza says like, Malachi is so down bad it makes him look stupid lol poor guy he's such a romantic], I got all kinds of shit outta the sprints! My husband also helped me with a situation for the book I'm writing where Malachi and Dolcezza get stranded for a minute due to a car malfunction, and since Harrowben is a Car Gay, they were ready to help me, which resulted in me having a Husband Insert character lmao his name is Ben, he rides a motorcycle, he helps people fix their cars, he razzes Dolcezza for not having a work log for his truck, it's very fun.

I don't think I could have accomplished this much without having a group of people that inspire and encourage me, having a writing group fucking rules tbh. And we're doing a gas up call for me on Wednesday were I get to sit and listen to people bark about the fact that I keep writing emotionally charged stories and scenes that make them wanna scream cry throw up lol I'm SO excited. The gas up calls I've been a part of where I'm on the support side have been so fun and I think taking a break to tumble someone else's concept, to come up with ideas with them, to ask questions about their stories, it's a very good way to reinvigorate your own story/writing brain! Hmmm... I don't think I have anything else exciting to report. I'm just a very busy man lol, I make plans with everyone all the time, and I am not tired, or ungrateful for all the love and attention I receive, or how deeply I am valued in my communities, but man it sure is hard to journal when you're running full sprint and breaking the sound barrier to get all of your shit done lmao. But I'm back on it! Lovely to talk with you again. Today's excerpt is a pre-husband-insert moment between Malachi and Dolcezza while they're waiting for Ben to show up, watching a pair of tortoise-deer creatures battle each other and talking about philosophy. I made Dolcezza a Sagittarius because I can and it makes me laugh lol Taglist: @theskeletonprior @tragedycoded @badscientist @thelittlestspider If you'd like to be added to my taglist, please interact with this post

“Looks like your spark plug is busted…” Malachi says from within the car hood. 

“Ah, damn it all.” Dolcezza groans, sighing and tipping his head back before he goes around the truck to dig around in a large duffle bag Malachi only knows contains some first aid supplies and the flare gun. He produces that and continues digging, checking the canisters for the gun before selecting one with another belabored sigh. 

“Ben’s gonna have my ass.” He says to himself as he moves off the road and into the lush, mossy grass, putting several feet between himself, Malachi and the truck. He raises the gun and fires, the flare producing a comet of black smoke that is oddly ominous for an issue as trivial as spark plugs being shot. Though… Malachi thinks of all the cars abandoned in the wilderness, reclaimed by the land. Perhaps something like this is the sort of life or death situation that calls for a flare that blots the blue of the sky with pitch black. 

“We in some trouble?” Malachi asks cautiously, watching the black smoke disperse. Dolcezza follows his look and huffs a laugh. 

“Oh, no honey. I’m in trouble, but not you. Our travel mechanic just likes black, ah, goth I think they call the style. Town uses red for trouble, yellow for new folks found, blue for new resources. Benji just likes black is all. Shouldn’t be long, they ride a bike like a bat outta hell.” Dolcezza says, returning to the truck to put the flare gun back where it belongs. Malachi hums, coming around the truck to stand next to Dolcezza where he’s leaned his hip against it to light up a cigarette. 

“Is that why there’s so many cars with their hoods opened up?” He asks and Dolcezza hums around his smoke to affirm Malachi’s observation. 

“Makes it easy to tell which ones have been gone through for parts. Ben’s the sort of guy who would know by looking which one’s he’s touched, but they keep the hoods popped for the rest of us that might know what to do with our cars and want to go hunting for bits ourselves.” Malachi knows how to change spark plugs, it’s easy work, but as he looks around them all the cars in sight have been opened up and scavenged. Nothing to do but wait then. Dolcezza offers him his cigarette. Malachi takes it, breathes in the smoke, thinking about Dolcezza’s lips for just an indulgent moment before offering it back. There’s a comfortable silence between them, especially when a pair of tortoises have wandered from behind some of the cars, spotting each other at a distance. They are altered by the territory like anything else have, made strange in that they have long, jagged antlers protruding from their wrinkled heads and their shells are covered with fur the way a water turtle might get grown over with algae. The fur is raised like hackles as they stomp towards each other, making good time for tortoises. They meet and clash their antlers together with clacking that Malachi and Dolcezza can hear from where they stand, battling with slow and determined swings of their long necks. One of them catches the other in the shell and flinging its head back, some of that earthy brown fur goes flying. Malachi and Dolcezza wince in tandem, Malachi softly saying ‘oof’ while Dolcezza whistles. 

“It’s always like this, isn’t it?” Malachi asks, glancing Dolcezza’s way. 

“Sure. It’s always changing, but it’s always like this, yeah.” Dolcezza confirms, eyes still focused on the tortoises and their struggle. “Sometimes it’s worse than this, sometimes it’s better, just like anywhere else I suppose. People make a real fuss outside the territory, ‘specially with how odd the Tennessee Void is, but my heart goes out to people that way. It’s not so bad here… the changing is the worst part, of course. Ain’t nothing comparable to it in this world, I don’t think, not that we know as people.” Dolcezza sighs and looks Malachi’s way.

 “I’ve seen a lot of shit, helpin’ people out here, cartin’ around scientists and shit. Nature don’t got no qualms about killin’ and eatin’. With a lot of things, that’s the whole point of bein’ here. Fuckin’, fightin’, feastin’. Don’t know how we got to thinkin’ we’re different and separate, but it’s what makes us I think… we don’t kill and eat things we love, try not to, anyway, build the whole world round trying not to. But it’s natural.” Dolcezza laughs softly at the way Malachi is looking at him. His stupid fucking face is doing what it does always, admitting his fascination, revealing that he’s captive to Dolcezza’s handsome mouth and the words coming out.  

“Philosophical, I know it. I can go on an’ on, I’ll tell ya that. Some sweet girl I caught up a few months ago told me it’s cuz I’m a Sagittarius, whatever the hell that means. Somethin’ in the stars- she told me all about it but just now I can’t tell it to you again. Don’t know what the stars got to do with us… this, all this here? It’s got to do with us, to be sure.” He gestures around them. 

“Yeah… I get what you mean. We’re not in the stars, we’re here, in nature.” Malachi answers back, and Dolcezza smiles, beautiful, pleased to be understood. 

“‘Xactly.”

[katethevampire]

All right so the new episodes just came out like 20 minutes ago for me (oh yeah me from the future here it ended up taking me about 3 hours to finish watching the episodes cuz I kept pausing to write stuff in between so uh yeah lol) so everything under the cut will be my live reaction to everything. I'll add time stamps so you know where I'm at in the episodes. I can guarantee you that I will be sticking to my promise about potentially eating paper if I'm wrong about Sir Pentious not dying. Which honestly now I'm not sure if anyone will die, it was pretty much confirmed in a live stream that angel dust isn't going to be the one to die so my money is on one of the Angels. Also I'm using voice to text and while I'll try and fix any misspellings or wrong words I might miss them.

LOTS OF SWEARING PROBABLY also I very much abuse capslock

EPISODE 7

00:51- I love Sir Pentious looking at Keke I just thought I should mention that

01:03- OH MY GOD NO KEKE MOVED TO HIS LAP AND HE'S PETTING HER I LOVE HIM SM

01:10 aw Alastor was sleepy you guys woke him up!

01:22- I CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE RAZZLE AND DAZZLE BEING CUTE CHARLIE IS CRYING

01:29- he did the gay little hand thing

01:50- okay so I've already seen this part because of the small leak but I cannot get over the fact that Alastor has his shoes on the bed!! Like man take those off you're getting it dirty!!!!

01:59- mfs kicking his feet on the bed acting like a high school girl about to ask out her crush on the phone at a sleepover like dude you're a serial killer you can't do this to me 😭 also I should probably slow down cuz I'm making an update literally every 2 seconds

02:18 BROS CHECKING HIS NAILS AND DOING THAT POSE WHILE MAKING FUN OF HER ABOUT THE FACT THAT SHE UNINTENTIONALLY MIGHT HAVE CAUSED THE DEATHS OF MILLIONS 💀💀💀 so fruity i love

2:33- Alasto be like "it's called masking deary. Ever heard of it?"

2:44- if he wasn't saying this in such an evil manner right now I'd be saying he's so me frfr

3:07- what do I even say to that line. He popped off but also like respectfully I think I've heard a third grader say the exact same thing

3:53- OKAY SO I WAS GOING TO SAY SOMETHING BUT I'VE COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN LOOK AT THIS FRAME, this could easily be the profile picture for someone's film review channel and I'm not 100% sure that people will understand what I mean by that unless you know a very specific person

04:38- Alastor is in his hat man era

4:33- okay so a few things, thank you subtitles for telling me that the music is edgy I feel like just the word tense would have worked on its own but I appreciate it nonetheless. Number two, I don't like seeing the girlies be mad at each other :(

05:34 I will support my boy Sir Pentious through and through he did nothing wrong!!

06:54- not the voice I was expecting for Rosie but pop up Queen she speaks the truth

07:24- ROSIE KNOWS WHAT YOU ARE ALASTOR. Also his confusion, I love him so much

11:04- she's kind of like that one Pokemon

Ad time!- I DON'T CARE ABOUT VITAMIN PILLS THAT DOUBLE MY LIFESPAN

11:13- catabettes! Cannibals and catabettes!!! This is going into my vocabulary from now on. Also this frame that I paused at I love her face.

11:57- ugh, susan. All my homies hate Susan

12:54- I have a dream, I'm here to cause a scandal in the cannibal square

13:37- :( well it wasn't obvious to me I just thought the x over the eye was to look cool :(

14:35- SONG FUCK YEAH

15:26 If this song came out years ago I know for a fact there would have been an undertale parody version of it. Also I just got a cosmic brownie and some chocolate milk let's go guys we're eating good tonight

16:00 HOLY FUCKING SHIT SHE CAN JUST GROW BACK HER WINGS

16:30- therapist Rosie is not something I thought I'd be seeing today but honestly I love it. Also I don't think I'm going to be able to finish these episodes today because I'm only a little over 15 minutes through and I've been watching for like almost over half an hour and also I just realized that what if Lucifer is the one that dies?

18:12 ALASTOR GAVE HER HIS MICROPHONE I'M GOING TO EXPLODE INTO A BAJILLION CRYING PIECES RAHHHHHH

19:38 I'm going crazy I'm going insane right now bro literally what how I don't know what to say I love this act I don't know, it's just really good I don't know what to say like this is cool I don't I DON'T KNOW! IT'S I I LIKE IT everybody in cannibal town is cool and I like them and it's like 10 seconds later now and they're literally So based like free food like so me I don't know I'm just rambling at this point

20:56 ALASTOR AND ROSIE'S LITTLE DANCE THEIR LITTLE TIPPY TAPS OH MY GOD YES

21:06- alastor, you know it's not right to make someone your political puppet. Your little dances are cute though so I'll allow it for now.

I don't know why it thought I was speaking Spanish for a second but anyways that episode was really cute and good and I liked it but I'm also scared for the next episode cuz like now I'm wondering is someone actually going to die or were people just lying. I feel like either Adam is going to be the one to die or it's going to be Lucifer cuz they mentioned a lot in the previous episode about how Charlie needs to take up the throne and get ready to take her place on the throne like why does she need to take her place on the throne? Isn't that her dad's job??? Please don't kill Lucifer off please please please 🙏 also I'm still not on board and probably will never will be on the whole political puppet thing. Like I just know I just have a feeling in my bones that alastor's favor is going to be something like "Let me be the ruler of hell lololol" or something anyways

EPISODE 8

01:01-Why are you watching other men get fucked?🤨 (/j)

01:19 🥺 I love 🥺 I oove him so 🥺 so much 🥺🥺🥺 does he have a spatula like spongebob

02:02- wait so how is Vox watching them like does he have bug cameras in the air like those little guys in v3 (woah now I have to put a Danganronpa spoiler on this)

03:42 SOFT ALASTOR FANFICTION WRITERS QUICK WRITE THAT DOWN WRITE THAT DOWN!!!

04:18- I'm not even the biggest huskerdust shipper but awwwww also I don't ship him with anyone but I just want to see Sir Pentious happy pleaseeee also the little Melody of loser baby in the background

04:48- ugh I am clutching my heart right now Sir Pentious is my SON and I LOVE HIM

04:58- what the fuck that ao3 tag was canon this WHOLE TIME???? WHEN DID YOU GUYS HEAR ABOUT THIS?????

05:05- I told you angel dust wasn't going to die

05:38- it's like the song but different! Reprise it's called a reprise also is Mimzy gonna come back

07:15- Vox, you know that you guys are going to die if they lose too right?

Okay I can't timestamp this cuz I'll just be pausing every 2 seconds but just know that everything I'm saying after this is from 07:52 to whatever number I put after later right here->09:47

Okay, so this might be a weird comparison but you know like My Little pony Battle scenes? This feels like that in the very best way possible where they have the scenes with all the different characters fighting with the different music.

Oh my God yes Cherry bomb and angel dust I love them also that was a fire transition also I JUST NOTICED THAT SIR PENTIOUS HAT ALSO HAS THE EYE DOES HE JUST HAVE I HATS FOR EVERY OCCASION

Uh oh Adams angry he's going to do a my hero academia

Oh shit it actually worked that's not good.

I TOLD YOU I CALLED IT VOX IS HORNY

Oh my God that is such a cool shot guys someone should make that frame of Alastor their computer background

OH MY GOD WHOEVER ANIMATED THAT SCENE I LOVE YOU I'M LITERALLY GIVING YOU A METAPHORICAL KISS ON THE MOUTH IN THE PLATONIC SENSE ALASTOR LOOKED SO COOL

Guys I think Adam's going to die

😨 okay so Alastor's microphone just broke and I paused it to add that emoji but as I did the people I live with got home so I'm going to have to pause it for there? I'll update if I get prime working on my phone. Also isn't alastor's microphone alive? Maybe that's the character that died.

Update: all right I got it set up on my phone about 30 minutes later now we're resuming

09:47- okay so I think it's interesting that Alastor pretty much lost all his powers as soon as his microphone broke, my guess is probably that whoever has his soul (lilith, eve, or anyone else) gave the mic to him.

09:53- I like the detail that Alastor is still smiling even though he literally just got slammed against the wall, also Vox has the biggest hate boner for Alastor like

10:02- Alastor: "Have to disagree with you there, radio's not dead." Hun you are bleeding out I'm sorry but I don't think you can gaslight girlboss your way out of this one, also I'm sorry to tell you but the only thing they play on my local radio station now besides music is like, a show that's only on at like 7 in the morning where people call to complain about how their husband wraps Christmas presents

10:38- haha silly also EGGS!!

10:43- NO WAIT MY BRAIN DIDN'T REGISTER THAT THAT EGG WAS CRACKED THEY KILLED THE FUCKING EGG!!!!!! Angel, kill them.

11:12- no no no Sir Pentious you better not I don't want to eat paper

11:21- good for him

11:44- NO GOD DAMN IT PLEASE HAVE A REVEAL THAT ALASTOR OR LUCIFER OR SOMEONE ELSE SAVED HIM PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏 I AM BEGGING ON MY HANDS AND KNEES

12:03- okay this is really cool but is he actually dead cuz I'll legitimately be really sad if so

12:50- *that one vine* "*gasp* Adam."

13:23- KILL HIS ASS CHARLIE

14:12 yes Vaggie, queen shit

SIR PENTIOUS ARE YOU DEAD /J OR /SRS?????

14:35 I KNEW IT I KNOW HE WAS GOING TO COME BACK I MEAN I GOT KIND OF SPOILED CUZ I I SAW THE COVER OF THE EPISODE BUT WOAH 10/10 ENTRANCE

14:44- gasp! His face!

15:00- he is, so stupid. I love him.

15:51-okay I went quiet for a minute cuz there were so much happening but oh my God what do I even say this is just so cool also I don't know if this is intentional or not but the blood stain on Charlie's hair is shaped like an apple

16:34- NIFFTY RAHHHHHHH

17:08- wait okay I had a brief thought that maybe lute was actually Eve but I think I'm wrong on that

17:13- Sir Pentious would've liked pancakes :((((((

Ad Time! I don't care about hard Rock Cafe I just want to know whether or not Sir Pentious is actually dead please I'm going through all the stages of grief right now and Brandan Rogers just came on my screen as Katie killjoy please

18:04- Keke :(

Oh my God they're going to find him in the rubble right? ... Right?? Right guys right???????

18:10- fat nuggets survived that's good I see a rock that looks suspiciously shaped like Sir Pentious military hat whoa guys I wonder if that means anything and it looks like it's up like someone is standing? Whoa I wonder if they'll check behind that rock please

18:16- wait is he actually dead I'm genuinely about to cry

19:16- I am not crying about his death until the episode ends I am not crying until it is 100% CONFIRMED that he died

20:50- omg alastor's alive, he's in his Jack's skeleton era that means that maybe Sir Pentious is also-

21:08- friends :) he said friends just saying

22:04- I TOLD YOU I FUCKING TOLD YOU I TOLD YOU THAT BY DYING IT WAS JUST A CHARACTER BEING REDEEMED I TOLD YOU I'M SO SMART I'M NOT EATING PAPER HAHAHAHAHA I'M THE GREATEST MAN ALIVE HE'S NOT DEAD MY SNAKE BOY ISN'T DEAD HOW DID I GET SO ATTACHED TO HIM I DON'T KNOW BUT I LOVE HIM YES I CAN'T EXPRESS MY EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW I'M GENUINELY SO HAPPY THIS IS WHY THIS IS WHY I WAITED UNTIL THE VERY END TO CRY ABOUT HIM I KNEW HE WASN'T GOING TO BE DEAD THEY WOULDN'T KILL HIM OFF THEY WOULDN'T KILL MY SNAKE BOY OFF JUST LIKE THAT

22:34- you're telling me Lilith was just doing hot girl shit on the beach for 7 years.

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 30

chapter 49:

1. jegulus jumpscare (it’s a dream i wasn’t expecting)

2. shit. the dream is about their wedding plans. i- i can’t do this shit while reg is in the arena

3. shit it’s raining and i know reg can’t handle it because of the last crimson river/arena

4. god, sirius wakes up to the rain and his first thought it to go save regulus

5. “"Lily, have you been using sex for favors?"

"No." Lily pauses, then snorts. "Well, alright, so this is how it works, yeah? I'm already having sex, and then I'm like, say, look at you all laid out and desperate to give me what I want; don't you want to do this very small, very simple thing for me? And then they mostly always say yes, and they get what they want, all while I'm having a grand time and also getting what I want. See? Win-win.””

😭😭😭 i love her your honor

6. “”I cannot believe that this revolution is partially running on your competency in sex."

"Oh, if only it could fully run on that. Everything would go so smoothly. Shit, we'd win the war in, like, a week.""

😭😭😭💍♥️ marry me please

7. “”I keep telling [Effie] I know exactly how to make her feel better, but she insists she's a married woman, and also far too old for me. Disappointing, really.”” 😭😭😭

8. james confronting lucius has me scared for remus. like, i know they can’t trace it back to remus, but i’m so scared

9. james is pissed at the world and it’s honestly scary

10. i know james is trying to use donations, but i’m also aware that riddle wants to make sure no donations make it to reg, sirius, or marlene

11. “"Aw, your boyfriend sent you a present," Rabastan teases, his tone lighthearted and good-natured.

"Fiancé," Regulus corrects sharply”

GAGGED. he took james’ words and fucking ran with it like nobody’s business

12. not narcissa welcoming james to the family 😭😭😭😭

13. james sent him a bagel and all the death eaters are making fun of him for being gay over it 😭😭

14. all james sent on the card was “???” 😭😭 pls that’s so funny

15. poor eli

16. the sad bonding over marlene and sirius having recovered from drinking problems

17. don’t tell me that the fucking crimson river hands are coming out the hedges. i- god i hope reg gets to personally witness riddle’s downfall

18. AND THE FUCKING GREEN MIST??? FUCK THIS

19. “You never truly do feel as alive as when death is breathing down your neck.”

oh he’s insane as hell. a black for sure

20. shit. sirius’ mind just went blank in the maze

21. the hallow is cruel beyond belief for this

22. “He has had dreams of Regulus, ah, using his dagger during…intimate moments, but is that something he'd actually do? Well… Okay, bad example.” 😭😭😭😭

23. james was so close to an epiphany about mcgonnagal making everyone hate the games. he was so close

24. “Thorfinn said he'd have to be killed to be stopped from going after Sirius, even though Regulus explicitly told him what he'd do about that, and so Regulus killed him. Newton's third law: for every action in nature there is an equal and opposite reaction.”

bitch do not pull physics into this 😭😭

also that means that sir isaac newton existed in this universe, which if we see this as a future for our universe, it means that homophobia was prevalent at one point and the world straight up just eradicated it. 🤷🏽‍♀️ pro for this universe ig

25. “When he lifts his head, the first thing Regulus sees is his brother.

The second thing he sees is Sirius' fist, just the flash of it, just seconds before it collides with the side of his face.”

he had it coming fr

[maybeimamuppet]

Cadnis 22?

hellooooo friend tysm!!

22 cadnis “i’ve seen the way you look at me when you think i don’t notice.”

“What are you looking at?” Cady murmurs quietly, not looking up from her math textbook. Janis jolts and drops her pencil, quickly snapping her gaze away from where it had been roving over Cady’s face. Anywhere else.

“Nothing, sorry. You, uh… have a fuzz in your hair,” she lies quickly, desperately trying to remember where she left off in her chemistry notes. The ones she’s supposed to be studying, instead of studying the little strawberry blonde next to her.

Cady chuckles breathlessly to herself, a quick thing, and grins down at a graph.

“What?” Janis asks.

“You’re a horrible liar,” Cady replies quietly as she scratches something down in her notebook and flips to the next page in her text.

“I’m not lying!” Janis insists.

“Janis,” Cady says, putting her pencil down and looking up at her. “You are. I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice. You’ve done it since before Spring Fling.”

“And what way is that?” Janis asks defensively.

“Like you’re in love with me or something,” Cady responds with one of those gentle smiles that got Janis into this mess in the first place. Janis can’t help but crack a smile too.

“Plastic habits die hard, eh?” she jokes. Cady’s lips twitch and her smile falls.

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Then how did you mean it?” Janis asks quietly.

Cady turns away just a little, like she’s looking for any way out of this situation she can find. “I meant it like it wouldn’t be a bad thing if you were.”

Janis frowns in confusion. “It was a few months ago.”

“And people can change in a few months, Janis,” Cady replies with a delicately frustrated huff. “Realizations can be made. Boyfriends can be broken up with.”

“Realizations?”

“I’m gay, Janis!” Cady huffs, slamming her hands on the table and standing so quickly Janis’ chair tips backwards and she’s sprawled on the ground before she even knows how to respond. “Shit, sorry.”

Cady carefully helps her up and waits for her to settle again. Janis looks at her expectantly.

“I’m… bi. I like girls too,” she whispers. She’s known Janis is a lesbian for months, but she still cowers like she’s afraid Janis will kick her for daring to come out. Like she’s encroaching on her territory.

“Okay,” Janis murmurs, gently coaxing Cady to sit down again. “That’s cool. I’m glad you told me.”

Cady holds herself tightly as she stares blankly down at her textbook, pencil still lying forgotten on the page. “I guess I don’t like… girls. I like girl.”

“Singular?”

Cady nods.

“Who is it?” Janis asks. Cady slams her head into the table. “What?”

“I’m questioning it now,” Cady replies into the white wood. “But it’s you.”

“Me?”

“Were you in space for this entire conversation?” Cady huffs, but she’s smiling as she sits up. “Yes, you, dummy.”

“Oh,” Janis squeaks in reply.

“Yeah. So no, not a bad thing if you happen to be in love with me,” Cady replies, suddenly back to holding herself in that painfully insecure way.

“Oh,” Janis says again. Cady bites her lip and snaps back to working again so quickly Janis jumps a little.

“Anyway,” she says with a trill of her lips.

“Wait,” Janis says, shaking her head to clear it of the gay alarm bells that have been ringing in her ears for the last few minutes. Cady hesitantly turns to look at her.

“…What?” she asks anxiously when Janis doesn’t move for a second. Damn it brain, move.

Cady gasps as Janis lunges forward and kisses her. She takes a second herself before she’s leaning back into it, pressing herself closer to Janis and smiling against her lips. Her little hands come up and cup Janis’ face, cool and callused in the most thrilling way. Janis winds her arms around her waist, and Cady eventually ends up straddling Janis’ lap.

“Wow,” she gasps adorably when they regretfully have to breathe. Janis chuckles and kisses her again.

“Wow,” she echoes. “Anyway, yeah, uh… might be in love with you. Or something.”

“That sounds tits,” Cady replies with a conniving smile. Janis gasps.

“I’ve taught you so well.”

[hildegardladyofbones]

BUCKLE UP I HAVE A LOT TO SAY

10, 13-24 (yes this is twelve questions. they're very important)

Ooh boy. I will explain every answer because I feel like the answers are meaningless without context.

10. What song would you want played at your funeral? This one is hard. I don’t know which one songs will remain important to me, so I'll make a decision based on if my funeral was like. Tomorrow. So I'd say maybe perhaps "Isle of flightless birds" by tøp, or "the worst is over" by matt elliott. Both I've listened to for few years at least and I associate some important memories with both. Then there are also some estonian classics which I love ("see pole see" by marju kuut for example). It'd be funny if I chose danse macabre tho. "That's right, I'm dead, and you're next. Let's dance"

13. If you could commit any crime without consequences? The only murder that has actual appeal to me is the murder of the self/ego. And that one has no legal consequences so uh trespassing? I wanna look at some abandoned houses. Oh I also want to steal. I love thievery.

14. Would you rather know the date or the cause of your death? I was gonna say the cause but I'd actually wanna know the date on which I died. I want to know if it was the day of my birth. Have I ever been alive? That sorta shit

15. What would you do if you want a dead body in a hotel room? Do the selfish thing first and use it for inspiration and then call the police because I've practiced what to say wayy too often to let an opportunity like that pass.

16. Are we really living or are we slowly dying? Depends on the person, but I am slowly dying. I am already dead, but that death keeps evolving.

17. Do you like the taste of blood? I like the taste of blood the same way I like the sight of dead birds with snapped necks and the smell of cigarette smoke. (Yes)

18. If you had to lose a body part, which one? The obvious answer would be like "my middle toe" or something but as much as I hate feet a voice in my head would say my left eye.

19. Would you rather be frozen, burned or drowned? Burned. At the stake. Until nothing remains.

20. If there's a hell of some sort, do you think you're going to it? I mean. Probably? Depends on what's considered a sin worthy of damnation? Like i haven't intentionally damaged someone's property or sth, but I have done some minor immoral things and not felt that much guilt. I am also obsessed with myself, if that's anything. AND I'm 60% sure I'm gay. AND I am so full of envy and greed and gluttony and etc. AND-

21. How would you dispose of a body? I'd turn it into an installation art piece, that way no one would ever think twice about it.

22. Would you kill a stranger to save someone you love? Yes absolutely. I'd let them die or kill them myself. I am a helplessly devoted person.

23. Would you rather be burned at the stake, die a saint beloved by all, or die peacefully, but have nobody remember you? Oh my god- to go out in such a flashy and iconic way AND be remembered and beloved by all? That is everything I've ever wanted

24. Would you rather eat a part of a human heart or a whole human eye? First of all- I *hate* eyeballs, second of all- I love cannibalism and eating a heart could have such beautiful symbology to it.

25. What question would you ask the devil? Gimme the ability to turn my misery into art efficiently pls. Also how can I get horns like that? For Gender reasons