#me: “😧😧😧 uh oh. uhhhhhhhhhhhhh” *feels like deleting the post*

[suusoh]

I miss you and your johan yapp sessions hope you're doing well 🫶🫂

I am nonnie! And I hope you are too!! (ɔˆ ³(ˆᴗˆc) lil ol me just got a bit overwhelmed with the suusoh blog and the slight traction it's been getting now.

I guess if we really want to get into it, I think lots of ppl have been getting reaching out to me and saying they get inspo from my stuff, which is super freaking neat btw and I'm happy people are starting to write now!! yes!!!!!!!

—but a part of me is/was slightly panicking because I'm very much aware that the way I write johan and monster is super ooc and delulu.

which i absolutely freaking love btw! don't get me wrong. I love writing johan getting heart palpitations and passing out just by the sight of his darling sweetheart love of his life liebchen and nothing will stop me from doing that.

It's just I get a bit panicky when people say I become their main source of inspo for johan writing, when it feels like I've been watering down johan a LOT. so a small part of me was like "ah is that so?... haha... ha...haha....noooooooooooo, oh god please don't get inspo from me. Get your johan inspo from other writers who actually do him good no pls pls pls pls don't let my johan writing "inspire" you. please get better source material, and not this fucking brainrot of a blog. oh god oh god."

but again, nothing the ol "ah fuck it. it is what it is" mentality can't do right? no point in worrying over how people perceive me, when this is my blog anyway and I'm allowed to use it however I want :-) and it seems to me y'all are enjoying the ride as well

also ngl loves, I've been feeling a bit down in the dumps with writing. I think the only thing powering me through tough times are the comments and asks that actually kinda...well, have nice words about my work. I write for myself but... you know, some appreciative comments from time to time is enough to make a starving artist feel full for a day. a week or months even. so nice comments like yours are so very greatly appreciated!! :-))