#me holding a star and and he probably thinks he's holdin a star too cause im in his arms AWWABSJSKA!!/!/ | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

roachvalentine · 5 years ago

Note

47 rosie & cass :3c

prompt - stars.

Embers from the fire lazily drifted upwards, disappearing into the starry night above. Rosie tipped her head back, trying not to notice how the wall behind her crumbled a bit more. She just brushed the dust off her shoulder before pulling the threadbare blanket tighter. It wasn’t that cold, even with the campfire dying down. It was more of a comfort.

“That fire won’t burn any longer than it wants too.” Out of the corner of her eyes, Rosie watched Cass poke at the campfire. Kicking up the embers to coax out a few more minutes of light and warmth.

“It tell you that, huh?” Cass eyed her while stoking the fire. It did nothing but cause more embers to float up and away. Rosie just hummed a little response and Cassidy huffed, throwing in the stick. “What are you doing out here anyway?”

“Can’t sleep.” Rosie ducked her head when Cass snorted at such an obvious answer. “Yeah, I know but it’s true. Got too many nerves makin’ their home in my head.”

And a few more came bustling in as Cass came to sit next her. Leaning against the wall, their arms almost touching. If Rosie could work up the courage to just reach out and close the gap. It was nothing at all really. Just the day gone by, Rosie had kissed her! And Cass hadn’t brought it up. So maybe it wasn’t that bad.

Oh but what if it was… Maybe that was why Cass hadn’t said anything. She was trying to forget it. Or just thought of it as a friendly kiss between friends? Rosie had been affectionate with her friends that felt comfortable with it. What if she was uncomfortable with it? Oh no, was Cass uncomfortable with Rosie? But that would take a lot and-

“-Rosie.” Cass’s voice cut through the wave of thoughts that crashed through her mind and Rosie blinked. “If you’re drinking, you better start sharing with me.”

“Hm? Sorry, got a bit tangled up.” Rosie smiled sheepishly before her eyes caught Cass’s and her breath caught. “Um, can you- can you say again? I promise I’m listening.”

“You’re really lucky.” Cass shook her head. “I said, what do you even have to worry about? I watched you flash that sweet smile of yours to Alice MacLaffery, talk about shit all until the sun went down. Which was confusing as all hell, even knowing you had a plan. And as soon as the room was cleared, break into that safe faster than I can down a bottle.

“Then somehow, you manage to get into the backroom of the Silver Rush? I tried to ask Arcade but he was no help, just played dumb and told me he didn’t see anything. I’m pretty sure he’s lying but I can’t tell.”

That sweet smile of yours… The thought settled in and warmed Rosie. Her heart skipped a beat, or two. She wanted to ask what other things Cass liked about her. If she had a list or was it just little things that floated around her like fireflies. Glowing in her ribcage and encouraging her heart to speed up. Rosie wanted to know if Cass thought about her like she did. Hummed along with the songs that Mr New Vegas played, imagining she was singing them to her.

The last one was probably just Rosie.

“Well yeah, I was doing those things for you. Uh, what I mean to say is that it’s easier to do things for other folks. I can just shove those nerves away because someone else is dependin’ on me. But what’s makin’ me nervous. Well, it’s all on me. You don’t have to worry.”

Rosie’s lips felt warm, just thinking about the kiss from yesterday. It was such a small thing! But as it connected with all the rest of her complicated feelings, it seemed a lot bigger. She wanted to shake away the thoughts but they were stuck tight.

“Now you know I don’t listen.” Cass leaned closer, a smirk playing around the edges of her lips. It gave Rosie the sudden urge to take a hold of Cass’s face and ask her quietly if she could kiss her again, for real. She’d just bark out a laugh, telling her that if Rosie didn’t kiss her then there’d be trouble.

And they’d kiss. And Cass would tangle her fingers in Rosie’s hair and their noses would bump. Hands would pull the other closer, slipping under fabric in search of skin and they’d quietly gasp at the contact. When they’d break, the fire would have burned out completely. Their foreheads together and they’d both suck in heavy breaths, needing air.

“But if that shithead tries anything, he won’t get very far.”

“Pardon?” Rosie blinked at Cass, trying to dispel the last moments from her, ahem, imagination. Even if some of it stubbornly clung. But she was able to pull up a name. “Oh, you mean Benny?”

“Yeah, him. I was wondering why we’d be hanging around this place for so long but, what with you being nervous. Makes sense.”

It did? Rosie opened her mouth to set the record straight but snapped it shut again. Because, sure Rosie was a little nervous about having to walk into The Tops to face the person who shot her and left her for dead. In a shallow grave. Without thinking, her hand lifted to touch the scar on her forehead. But that was a different set of nerves that weaved through her mind. The kind that made her palms sweat and her chest tight. Something she had felt before but couldn’t remember why.

But these nerves she got when thinking of Cass. They were silly and small, her face warmed with even the smallest of gestures. The almost kiss of sharing a drink from the same bottle, the way Cass gently held her steady when Rosie needed help to stand up and the chill that sets in when her hand was gone. The moments after a fight, after the dust has settled, when they both check each other for injuries. In the heavy silence, there was something almost intimate that wasn’t there with anyone else.

Rosie didn’t know how to explain all of that, so she just nodded. “Thanks, Cass. It’s good to know that I’ve got folks lookin’ out for me.” Pulling the blanket off her shoulders, Rosie spread it out over both of their legs. “Back home, when I couldn’t sleep, one of my dads would take me out to look at the stars. He’d point out the constellations and tell me the stories behind them. He, uh, used to have some pre war books about them, not that I ever saw them. But it helped, so I can’t really complain.”

“Hm, I just stole a bottle of whiskey and slept where I fell.” Cass laughed and bumped her shoulder into Rosie’s. “But if it’ll make you feel better, I’ll listen to the star stories.”

“Really?” Rosie sat up straighter and flashed a smile at Cass. “Alright, I’m holdin’ you to it. Over there is Ursa major…”

#glowstickia #okay but listen #rosie is the biggest romantic disaster who over thinks even a tiny lil smooch #so like of course she's gonna zone out like three times while sitting next to the person #she wants to kiss #meanwhile cass is like fucking campfire #also tho where do they get the wood for all the campfires #where are the trees?#also also this is a lil bit late #be gentle w/ me #courier; rosie howard #c; rose of sharon cassidy #fic tag #fic by pix

8 notes · View notes

chaossmagic · 5 years ago

Text

take me into your loving arms (2/2)

kiss me under the light of a thousand stars

Over the years, throughout the many ups and downs, one thing has always remained true; they feel safest and most at home in each other’s arms. They wouldn’t have it any other way.

A study in snuggles, physical closeness, and the non-sexual side of intimacy that Robert and Aaron both crave from each other.

(read on ao3)

iv.

When the bedsheets stopped smelling like Robert, Aaron slept in his dressing down, the thick quilted blue one that was so long, it hung down almost to his ankles. It was warm, and it had had Robert’s shower-fresh or sleep-tired skin next to it last, and if Aaron really tried, he could still smell the scent of aftershave and moisturizer on the collar of it. It was like having Robert himself wrap his arms around him in bed, holding him close, and it lulled him to sleep if he concentrated long enough on the memory.

Next, it was Robert’s old jumpers, the ones he couldn’t bear to throw out even though he’d had a hissy fit initially and swore to throw everything in the bin. An old, bobbly grey thing that was too small for him now but fit Aaron like a glove, and the sleeves so long he could cover his hands with them entirely, tucking them under his chin like Seb did when he slept in his cot, curled in on his side like a kitten.

Then, when that no longer satisfied him or made the pain left behind in Robert’s absence dull and bearable, he resorted to sleeping in Robert’s leather jacket, the shoulders too wide and the torso too long but still feeling like a warm cocoon of an embrace that might have been from his husband himself, if were there to give it to him.

It was close enough. It was all Aaron could manage to conjure up, thinking of Robert alone in a washed-out grey cell hundreds of miles away, and he hadn’t even had the guts to talk to him and tell him what was going on inside his head before he’d sobbed in his arms on the last day they’d ever seen each other, begged him not to forget him and sent him a divorce letter in the mail.

He missed him. He missed him so much it was like he had a permanent stomachache, always there in the background of everything he did. It was a physical throbbing that was left behind when part of himself, of who he was, had been torn away and was now unreachable. Robert had gone where Aaron couldn’t follow him, help him, or hold his hand and tell him things were going to be okay - all things he would have done, things he’d have done gladly and with honour, because Robert was his husband and it would have been his privilege to take care of him.

Like Robert had taken care of him, all these years.

He didn’t care if Robert didn’t think he deserved it. He’d do it regardless, because that was what you did when you loved someone as much as Aaron loved Robert, and if he didn’t, he’d be letting the man he loved down.

But he’d never gotten that chance.

And now everything was only parts of half a life, because Aaron was only half a person without him.

Robert was warm, steady and heavy against him, his breaths a calming wave of sound and sensation as Aaron let himself sink further into the sofa, stretching out a little so that Robert could lay his head more comfortably where it was pillowed on his stomach. It was softer now, with age and needing to take things steady - Aaron was softer and greyer all over now, a semi-permanent ache in his shoulders that he was told was early onset arthritis - but Robert didn’t seem to care. He was happy as a cat dozing on its favourite chair, hands curled in Aaron’s jumper and eyelids fluttering with half-sleep.

And to think, Aaron had almost never got to experience this again, this physical closeness that had always characterised him and Robert, the way each other’s presence always seemed to gravitate towards one another even if the room was full of people and the way things just felt...normal when he was there. Right. Easy. The way things were always supposed to be.

It had been almost eight years, but the feeling was the same. Home.

“I missed you so much, before,” Aaron said absently, stroking up and down Robert’s shoulder in a random rhythm, “I missed having you close, just holdin’ ya like this. Probably the thing I missed the most, really. Missed having your body next to mine, simple stuff. Cuddlin’ watchin’ crap telly, a goodnight kiss, a hug before you left for work in the mornin’...”

“I’m sorry,” Robert whispered. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to give you all of that. I missed doing all of those things with you, too, and remembering them, how it was...on the worst days, it’s what kept me going. The memory of you. How it used to feel before I threw a spanner in the works of everything good we had going for us.”

“Robert, don’t say that,” Aaron pleaded. “You didn’t mess everything up, okay? It was more like...a break forced on us by stuff outside of our control. And we both did things we shouldn’t have, alright? I’m as much to blame as you are, maybe more because I didn’t try hard enough to knock some sense into ya when you thought cutting us all off was a good idea.”

“What, you would have picketed the prison until I had no choice but to talk to you?” Robert asked, a glimmer of humour in his voice. Aaron had missed that, the sarcasm, the amusement at his own little jokes that was both incredibly nerdy and incredibly endearing.

“Maybe. Camped out, even played that stupid Adele song over and over on a loudspeaker if it meant you’d come and see what all the fuss was about.”

“It’s our song!” Robert huffed indignantly, “We have a song, Aaron, however much you want to ignore that we do.” He went quiet, then spoke again, voice small and soft. “I heard it, once, in the prison. One of the officers had a radio in reception and it came on. It was faint, but I heard it, and it was like...it was our wedding day all over again, and you were dancin’ in my arms even though you said you weren’t...I hadn’t felt that happy since before I went inside, that day when I heard our song. It brought me so much peace, but I also ended up a right mess after it. I refused meals for two days, till I was so dizzy I couldn’t stand up straight, and it reminded me of where I was and what the reality of the situation was really.”

“Robert,” Aaron gasped, his body tensing. His hand froze where he continued to stroke Robert’s arm lovingly, the fingers trembling. His voice came out strangled when he spoke. “No. Please tell me you didn’t do that on purpose more than once...the idea of you hurtin’ yourself the way I did...”

“It happened for a few months,” Robert admitted, “until I ended up losing enough weight for prison welfare to notice, and I got sent to a psychiatrist. Beatrice. She said I was a lost cause. She wanted to section me.”

Aaron made a low moan of pain that sounded like a wounded animal; it tore from his chest, animalistic and anguished, and foreign to his own ears even as he made the sound. Horror seemed to fill up every inch of space his body possessed; the idea of someone taking Robert, his Robert, broken and vulnerable and suffering, and locking him away in a sterile hospital because they thought he was mad...

It was unthinkable. Unbearable.

“Stupid useless prison system,” Aaron ground out between clenched teeth, shaking his head in disbelief. “I’m so sorry, Robert. If I’d been able to help ya...I’d never let them lock you away like that, I’d’ve done anything I could to get ya the right help...”

“I know,” Robert said softly. “I know you would have, Aaron.” He turned over then, looking up at him with huge, shining eyes, the colour of which Aaron had memorized down to the last specks of green and gold. It had been easy, because Robert’s eyes had been copied exactly into the face of their son, whom Aaron adored more than most anything else other than Robert himself. “I really, really missed you.”

A soft, gentle smile crossed Aaron’s face. Easy and content. “I really, really missed you, too.”

vi.

“Daddy,” a small voice said, a sharp little finger poking him in the cheek. “Daddy, Seb and Papa fell back to sleep and they’re snoring. It’s too loud.”

Robert blearily opened one eye, saw the scrunched-up face of his daughter looking back at him, her lips turned down in a pout. “Is that so?”

Ellie nodded emphatically. “Like Uncle Sam’s pigs. Oink oink oink,” she giggled, “Papa and Seb are like the three little pigs from the story!”

“Mmm, I suppose they are,” Robert mused, lifting his head up from his pillow to look over to the other side of the bed, where indeed his husband and their fourteen-year-old son were fast asleep - again - Aaron’s mouth open in rumbling snores while Seb snuffled and snorted, his strawberry-blond head resting against his father’s dark one. They were like two peas in a pod, Robert often thought, Aaron and Seb, like twins almost. He bit back a wide smile at the sight, how warm it made him feel in his chest. His husband, his son, and his daughter pressed in close to his side, four of them piled into their bed early in the morning on a lazy Sunday. His family.

“Daddy?” Ellie asked, her little hand reaching up to touch the side of his face, his cheekbone. “Why do you look like you’re sad?”

Robert shook his head, took his daughter’s hand and kissed the middle of her palm, inhaling the sweet baby-pink scent of her skin and fixing her with a steady gaze that was as serious as he could manage. “I’m not, princess. I’m happy. You remember how daddy had to go away for a long time before you were born, and that made him really sad?”

Ellie nodded. She’d been told the story before, the abridged version of her parents’ history, so that she’d understand why sometimes his moods changed or why he wanted to sleep all day or had to take special pills she wasn’t allowed to touch, pills that made him better so he could be with them.

“Well, now I have your Papa, and Seb and you, and thinking about the time when I didn’t have those things is hard, and when I look at all of you,” he pulled lightly on one of her curls, frizzy and wild so like Aaron’s, “I remember how lucky I am that I have such special people to look after me.”

“Like Papa looks after you, ‘cause you’re husbands,” Ellie said, pronouncing the word husbands carefully, the extra ‘s’ making it difficult with her baby teeth and slight lisp.

Robert looked at Aaron again; he’d shifted, one arm slung around Seb’s rising and falling chest. When he woke up, he was sure Seb was going to be mortified. He chuckled to himself.

“So, what should we do, Eleanor?” Robert asked her pensively, turning onto his stomach and resting his chin on top of folded hands. “Wait for them to wake up, or...” he raised an eyebrow, “pancakes with extra cream and strawberries just for the two of us?”

“Pancakes!” Ellie crowed, wriggling like a worm under the duvet, bare feet kicking with glee. If Seb had somehow inherited Aaron’s scowl, then Ellie had got Robert’s sweet tooth. Aaron blamed it on all the times he’d found him and their surrogate inhaling a packet of chocolate digestives between them, one claiming it was ‘stress eating’, the other indulging her hormones going rampant for sugar in her sixth month of pregnancy.

Only one of those reasons was deemed as valid.

“C’mon, then, little squirt,” Robert said, using the old nickname she’d had as a baby, swinging himself out of bed and swooping to put Ellie on his hip, where she grabbed onto the collar of his pyjamas and grinned like a cat who got the cream. “We might leave the sleepyheads some toast when they eventually wake up, yeah?”

“Yeah!” she agreed.

Robert carried her towards the door; when he reached it and pushed it open gently, he turned back for a minute to take another look at Aaron and Seb, still dead to the world. Ellie pressed her cheek against his neck, her curly hair tickling him where it sprung out in various directions.

“I love you, Daddy,” she whispered suddenly, her little voice loud in the quiet of the room. Robert pressed a kiss to her head, still gazing upon Aaron and Seb, his whole world and his pride and joy, and the soft warmth of the most precious thing in the world heavy in his arms. There was a reason why they’d given her the middle name Hope, and for Robert, she lived up to it every day - her, and the rest of his family, and the second - third - chance he thought he’d never get.

Home, he thought. This is my home. And I will cherish it forever.

#lorna's writing #robron #robron fic #aaron x robert #emmerdale fic

29 notes · View notes

rainoverthemountains · 6 years ago

Text

Twist story chapter 15

Twistfell and everything associated with it belong to @itsladykit

By the way, I love the comments, likes, and reblogs I’ve been getting. This is my first time posting anything online or writing an actual story, so each one makes me incredibly happy (and makes me feel like ignoring everything I should be doing in order to write more). I only vaguely understand tumblr so I haven’t figured out how to thank everyone (the only way I can see to respond to a reblog or its tags just seems like liking or rebloging my own story) but I love you all.

Summary: There’s a cure for LV (probably). It’s completely safe (probably). It’s a highly unpleasant experience (definitely). Twist only cares about that first statement. He probably should have paid a little more attention to the other two. But what does it matter? He’s getting what he wants, and he has the best friends and family in any universe to help along the way.

chapter 1, chapter 14

Chapter 15

“Just, uh… ‘s there a reason I’m covered in towels?” Cash and Blackberry stare at Twist blankly. “Somethin’ wrong?” Because it sure seems to be.

“that’s it? that’s all you need?” Cash sounds like he can’t quite understand why someone would want to know why they’re covered in towels. Blackberry looks a little better, but not much. Neither of them seem to know what to do with the question.

“Seems like a reasonable thing ta wanna know.” He’s feeling a little scrambled, but not terribly so, and it seems like a situation worth commenting on. Their reactions are concerning.

“Are they bothering you? Are they hurting you? I’m sorry, I thought it would help because your ribs were so hot, and it seemed like it did help, but I’ll take them off if they’re bothering you.” Blackberry reaches out to do just that.

“Hey, hey, never said they were botherin’ me! Feels nice! Jus’ wonderin’ what’s got you two so upset?”

“i’m not upset,” Cash mutters, but he looks away and fails to hide the purple glow on his cheek.

Blackberry doesn’t see it, the same way he misses most signs that Cash isn’t a complete asshole. “Well, you should be, and of course I’m upset. Papy, you almost died!”

“Is that what this is all about?”

“Brother! What do you mean, ‘is that what this is all about’? It seems like a pretty good reason to be upset to me!”

“don’t bother trying to get him to take any of this seriously. all he cares about is getting rid of the lv, and damn the consequences.”

“Well it won’t do much good to get rid of your LV if you’re dead.”

“I know-”

“don’t bother with that line of reasoning either. he won’t listen.”

“I’m listenin’ just fine, but-”

“Don’t tell me how to talk to my brother. I’ve talked him out of plenty of terrible decisions before.”

“Now wait jus’ a minute-”

“there’s nothing to talk him out of. he’s already had the treatment, so he’s in it for the long haul, at least until his lv drops a level. or until he’s dust.”

“‘m not gonna-”

“Well he could at least show some concern for his own health. How am I supposed to take care of him if he doesn’t even care that he almost died? Not that it would matter to you.”

“you’re one to talk, just accepting when your brother disappears for a week. not that i care, but-”

“THAT’S ENOUGH. Both’a ya.” Both skeletons go silent in shock. “I can see yer both tired an’ upset, an’ I’m tired too, so why don’cha both just settle down an’ we c’n talk about this like reasonable adults.” They both look at each other, then turn back to Twist, talking over each other.

“Surely you can see why I’m worried, brother-”

“you can’t just expect us to-”

“Enough! One at a time. ‘m too tired fer this.” They both glare at each other, then Cash crosses his arms and leans casually against the wall. And he thinks Twist is the ridiculous one?

“We’re just worried,” Blackberry explains solicitously. Cash snorts. “Fine, I’m just worried, and Cash has driven himself to the point of collapse taking care of you because that’s his idea of a fun way to spend the evening.” It’s probably best not to comment on the return of the purple blush.

“I get that yer worried, bro, but that’s no reason ta be fightin’ like this. How’s that s’posed ta help?”

“How does it help for you to almost die?”

“I didn’t die-”

“But you almost did, and you don’t even care!”

“Mind lettin’ me finish a sentence fer once?”

“Oh, sorry, I’m just so-”

“Worried, I know. I get that yer worried, bro, I really do. But ya gotta un’erstand, this ain’t how I’m gonna die, it’s how I’m gonna live. This’s gonna save me.”

“Save you from what?”

“Ya know the answer ta that. Don’ play naïve, bro, not about this.”

“Papy-”

“No. I know ya like ta think I was doin’ jus’ fine, an’ I didn’t like ta think ‘bout it either so I didn’t argue with ya much, but we both know I ain’t been fine fer awhile.” Blackberry averts his eyelights. “But now I will be. Jus’ gotta get through this first.”

“It won’t matter how much LV you have if you’re dust.”

“No, it wouldn’t, which is why I’m not gonna be dust.”

“Doesn’t seem like there’s much you can do about it.”

“Me? Nah. Not much I can do about anythin’ right now, an’ I know it. But it seems like there’re some monsters who’er pretty damn determined ta keep me alive, so I’m likin’ my chances. They’re at least better than they were with all the LV.”

“But you were managing it! You were ok!”

“Managin’, yeah, but not much more than that, an’ there’s only so long it c’n be managed. Look, bro, ‘m too tired ta talk about this now. ‘m not gonna dust, but this cure thing really takes it outta me. Did Cash fill ya in on how it works?”

“Not really. I mean, he did a little, but we were more concerned with keeping you from dusting or melting into a pile of molten bone. Or suffocating. Brother, just think about all the ways you almost died just since I got here. How can you act like everything is fine?”

“Never said everythin’ was fine. Whole situation can best be described by a bunch’a words yer always gettin’ on me fer sayin’.”

“stars-damned clusterfuck with a-”

“You hush.” Cash answers Blackberry with a middle finger, but puts no more effort into arguing.

“Not that I disagree with ya, darlin’, but that’s maybe not the most helpful right now.” Twist gets a middle finger too, before Cash sighs and makes his way over to slump in the chair. He looks about as close to passing out as Twist feels, but saying so would cause more trouble than it’s worth. It was probably too much to hope for that the helpful, relatively friendly version of Cash he’s seen for the past few hours would stay now that Blackberry is here. He’s surprised, and a little touched, that it lasted as long as it did.

Of course, it’s probably exhaustion, as much as anything. It can’t have been easy taking care of Twist through all of that, and he doesn’t know what time it is but it’s dark out. “Hey, sweetheart, why don’cha get some sleep.”

“i’m fine.”

“No, yer not, an’ if I can’t get away with it then neither can you.”

“it’s not exactly the same thing.”

“No, it ain’t, but yer not gonna do anyone any good if ya pass out an’ fall outta that chair. Think I’m spendin’ enough time on the floor fer the both of us.”

“Why are you spending time on the floor?” Blackberry demands, then hisses at Cash, “why is he spending time on the floor? Are you letting him lay on the floor? He should be in bed!”

“Bro! Stop. Ya gotta stop jumpin’ ta the worst possible conclusion. No one ‘let’ me lay on the floor. I ain’t doin’ too well with holdin’ still in bed, an’ ya mighta noticed I ain’t really up ta walkin’ around, so anytime I leave the bed I’m gonna end up on the floor. It ain’t Cash’s fault, an’ it’s only happened once since he started lookin’ after me, which is a better track record than Iggy had, and she had a whole lab ta work with.”

“you’d think with a lab and all her grant money, she could have come up with a better solution than tying you to the bed,” Cash mutters.

“She what?!” Twist winces. Blackberry really doesn’t yell all that often, but when he does, he can really put some volume behind it.

“It’s not as bad as he’s makin’ it sound. She was just keepin’ me outta trouble. I signed up fer this treatment knowin’ exactly how bad it could be. Signed all the papers an’ everythin’.”

“and how accurate were those papers? did they describe constant agony, completely non-functional magic, and constant flashbacks?” Blackberry whimpers at Cash’s description.

“They described it well enough. Think I’d’a backed out if I’d had a little more detail? I need this. I’m not gonna get mad at Iggy jus’ cause she wasn’t all that nice ‘bout givin’ me the rest of my life back.”

“she left you tied to a hospital bed, naked, alone, with nothing but some wires in your soul to let her know when you were in danger of dusting.”

“It wasn’t like that in the beginnin’. I ain’t the easiest patient.”

“what did you do, fall out of bed? scratch her hands?” Cash holds up his own hands, displaying the scratches and lines of dried magic from Twist’s claws. Twist winces.

“I’m sorry, darlin’. Ya really shouldn’t be around me when I get like that.”

“you mean when you’re in enough pain to try to rip out your own soul? or when you’re hallucinating and think you need to defend yourself? i’m having trouble seeing how any of that is your fault.”

“Maybe it’s not, but that don’ mean anyone else should have ta deal with it.” And could Cash please stop saying things like that in front of Blackberry? He looks torn between rushing off to murder Iggy and breaking down sobbing.

“it’s better than the alternative, and the fact that you’re arguing that it’s not doesn’t make a strong case for you being in the right frame of mind to make decisions about your health.”

“I ain’t sayin’ you should let me rip out my soul. I ain’t exactly enjoyin’ it right now, but I want it ta stay where it is as much ‘s the next monster. I’m jus’ sayin’ you should probly consider some other solutions ‘fore I do more damage than you c’n get over. That’s all Iggy did. She jus’ found a solution ta keep me from hurtin’ myself without lettin’ me shred her hands or puttin’ all her other work on hold ta babysit me. She didn’t know I got little thing ‘bout bein’ tied up.”

“a little thing? you were scared out of your mind.” That’s getting a little more personal than Twist would like. Fortunately, he has an excuse.

“Maybe I was, but that’s jus’ the way the treatment screws with my skull. You’ve seen how it turns everythin’ inta a big dramatic mess. Don’ mean nothin’, an’ she couldn’ta known how much trouble it’d cause me.”

“so you’re saying you never objected to it?”

“Yeah, course I did, a few times, but it ain’t her job ta make me comfy an’ happy. I ain’t the easiest person ta take care of, but she made it work. I may not’a liked how she did it, but I’m alive an’ I’m gettin’ rid’a my LV, an’ that’s what matters. An’ now I’m home, which is even better.” Cash just shakes his head, giving up.

Blackberry’s reaction is more concerning. The tears and rage are gone, replaced with a sweetness that isn’t one single bit genuine. Fuck. “I still think I need to pay her a little visit. Maybe bring her a lovely gift to thank her for her wonderful help.” Shit, he does not have the energy to talk his brother out of poisoning his doctor.

“Don’ do that.”

“Why not? Don’t you think she deserves something for taking such good care of you?”

“She was just tryna help.”

“Yes, and she was very helpful. That’s why she secretly locked you up in a lab and put acid in your soul. And tied you to a bed.” Blackberry doesn’t understand. He doesn’t understand how bad the LV problem was, so he can’t understand that it doesn’t matter what the solution costs as long as it works. He doesn’t understand that Twist agreed to this.

“Gonna poison me too, then?”

“What? Of course not. I’d never hurt you, Papy. Why would I do that?”

“I agreed ta the whole thing. Was as much my choice as it was hers. She was only doin’ what I asked her ta do.”

“We’ll that’s different. Obviously, she manipulated you and pressured you into agreeing to it without fully explaining the risks, and you-” he cuts himself off.

“I what? I was too stupid ta ask questions? Or say no? Or make my own decisions?”

“That’s not what I meant! I just mean that you’re, well…”

“Crazy? Impulsive? Scared outta my mind of losin’ my mind an’ killin’ everyone? All true, but it was still my choice, an’ I don’t regret it.”

“She still should have made sure you understood what you were getting into, or at least taken better care of you, or told someone about it so someone else could take care of you.”

“Yeah, she coulda done that. Woulda been nice. But I didn’ tell ya either, an’ I won’ have ya puttin’ all the blame on her for somethin’ that’s my fault, too.”

“But she hurt you! You always act like it doesn’t matter when people hurt you, but it does. It matters when you’re hurt! I hate it! You always try to pretend you’re fine but I know you’re hurt, and there’s nothing I can do about it because you always try to hide it from me, and-”

“C’mere, bro.” Blackberry collapses against Twist’s ribcage, sobbing. “Hey, shh, it’s ok. It sucks right now, but everythin’s gonna get better.”

“You can’t know that.”

“I know it’s more likely than it’s been in a long time.”

“But we were ok! We’re on the surface with all of our friends, and everything was getting better, and-”

“And it still is! C’mon, bro, I know ya don’t really think I coulda kept everythin’ under control forever. Yer smarter than that. But now I’m gonna be fine. And we’re still on the surface, an’ we still got our friends, an’ I know yer mad at Iggy but she wants her research ta work so she’s gonna make sure it does, so I’m gonna be around a long time ta enjoy everythin’ good that’s happened.”

“I don’t want you to die.”

“I’m not dyin’. ‘specially not with so many people who ain’t gonna let me.” He smiles at Cash over Blackberry’s head. Cash just scowls at him, but no amount of grumpiness can counter the way he’s been taking care of Twist or the decision to save him in the first place. “Now, ya both look exhausted, and so am I. How ‘bout we all get some sleep, an’ we can deal with the rest of it tamorrow.”

Cash scoffs. “and leave you unsupervised? that sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.”

“Then take turns sleepin’, er somethin’. Someone should get some sleep, at least.”

“You should go home, Cash. I can take care of everything here.”

“do you even know what taking care of everything involves?”

“I will once you tell me.”

“i’d tell you if i knew. iggy hasn’t been very forthcoming with information, probably because she wants twist back in the lab. she’s supposed to send more information soon, but i doubt there’ll be anything until at least tomorrow, if then.”

“Well tell me what you know for now.”

“give him lots of water. keep him in bed. that alarm you heard earlier is from an hp monitor attached to his soul. if it goes off, give him one of those injections you saw earlier. they have to go into his soul. they’re in that box.” He points to a box on floor by the dresser. “keep it closed because they can degrade in the light.” He pauses to think. “don’t give him normal food. there are some powders on the kitchen counter with instructions for how to mix them into some kind of shake thing. it tastes terrible but it’s good for him and it doesn’t strain his magic. try to avoid doing anything that might strain his magic.”

“Wait, let me write all this down.” Blackberry scrambles to get a notepad and pen and jots down some notes. “Ok, I’m ready for more. What was happening when I came in? I know his HP was falling, but why?”

“that was a node in his lv dissolving. don’t ask for details because i don’t know how it works, but apparently lv is distributed in some kind of network in the soul that’s connected through some kind of nodes. the medicine dissolves lv as it moves through his soul, and sometimes it gets into one of those nodes, which causes the pain you saw earlier. it means that it’s making progress, but it’s extremely painful and sometimes it can affect his hp. it can affect his emotional stability, too. i don’t know why, something about how everything is connected in the soul.”

Blackberry looks to Twist for confirmation. Twist wishes he had anything else to tell him.

“That’s about as much as I un’erstand, too, bro. Iggy showed me some readings one time that were s’posed ta show EXP destabilizing, or somethin’, but all I got outta it was that there was some kinda progress happenin’. So that’s good, at least, an’ most of those node attack things don’t fuck up my HP quite as bad as the one you saw.” And it looks like he’s getting a reprieve on the language monitoring, which is a nice bonus, because talking is getting to be a lot of work.

“he also has nightmares and flashbacks. your guess is as good as mine about what to do for those. he might have some suggestions.”

“Nah, not really. Jus’ don’t lemme hurt ya.”

“You wouldn’t hurt me, brother!”

“I might if I dunno who ya are. Look at Cash.”

“But he-”

“He’s been takin’ good care a’ me an’ he’s been too nice ta look after himself.”

“I’ve never known being too nice to be one of Cash’s problems.”

“Well maybe ya jus’ don’ look close enough.” Cash snorts. “An’ tha’s enough outta you, sweetheart. Yer ‘unredeemable asshole’ image is on shaky ground after all the shit ya’ve done fer me taday.”

“i’ll be sure to be more careful about that in the future.”

“Sure ya will. Yer jus’ grumpy ‘cause yer tired, darlin’. Get some sleep. I’ll be jus’ fine with my bro fer awhile. Anything else ya wanna tell him?”

“not that i can think of. blackberry, you should probably just call iggy if something unexpected happens. i did it once, and it kept twist from dying. she’ll probably try to convince you to take him back to the lab, but just refuse and she’ll tell you what to do instead.”

“How do you know all this anyway?”

“trial and error, mostly, and a few instructions from iggy.”

“No, I mean, how did you even know where he was?”

“i have my sources.”

“What sources?”

“that’s none of your concern.”

“It certainly is my concern when it involves you knowing where my brother mysteriously disappeared to and not telling anyone, even though you knew what was happening to him.”

“i didn’t know where he was until i called you. i didn’t even know he was missing. as soon as i realized what had happened, i brought him home.”

“And that’s another thing. Why didn’t you tell anyone that he was here? From the way you’re talking, you’ve been here for hours at least, and I never heard a word about it.”

“i was busy.”

“Too busy to text? It doesn’t take long to type ‘I found Twist, come home now.’”

“i assumed you’d come home before long. by the time it was clear that you wouldn’t, i assumed were busy wherever you’d found to spend the night, maybe loosened up enough to find another bed-”

“How dare you!”

Twist glares at Cash. “Patches. Shut it. Right now. I dunno what the fuck’s got inta you, but ya know perfectly well not ta talk ta my bro like that. An’ bro, cut the interrogation. Ya don’t need ta know every detail of every single thing that happened, an’ some things ‘er none’a yer business. Ya both wanna help me so bad? I wanna go ta sleep. Think ya c’n stop fightin’ long enough fer me ta do that, or do I gotta stay awake ta keep babysittin’ ya both?”

Blackberry looks stunned. “Papy! Can’t you see he’s hiding things? And what he just implied I was doing? You trust him too much.”

“An’ just a minute ago you were askin’ his advice on how ta take good care of me, an’ he was givin’ it to ya. And Cash, there was no call ta say that ta my brother. He’s just upset, an’ yer jus’ tired, and we’ll all do better after a good night’s sleep.” Not that Twist expects to get a good night’s sleep, but these two definitely need one.

“I’m not tired,” Blackberry insists. “Cash probably is though,” he acknowledges. Cash, of course, just snorts and turns away, but there’s no profanity or insults involved so Twist counts it as a win.

“Look, Patches, I really ‘preciate everythin’ ya’v done fer me taday. It’s been the best day I’ve had all week.”

“that’s a hard record to beat.”

“Yeah, well, it has been, an’ I know how I’d be spendin’ my night if it weren’t fer you. So thanks, darlin’.” Cash scowls. Twist continues anyway. “But now yer about as worn out as I am, an’ ya really need ta get some sleep. You c’n sleep here or go home, but sittin’ in that chair gettin’ more annoyed all night ain’t gonna do anyone any good.”

“I can take care of Papy,” Blackberry agrees. “We really do appreciate how much you’ve helped him, but I can take it from here.” Now what’s that expression on Cash’s face? It’s more than annoyance, more like… but it’s gone before Twist can figure it out.

“fine. since you’ve got everything covered, i’m going home. call iggy if anything unexpected happens.” Cash’s tone doesn’t sound right. It’s sort of flat, but flat isn’t unusual for him and it never sounds quite like that. Something is wrong, but Twist’s thoughts are getting a little fuzzy, and he just doesn’t have the energy to figure it out.

“I’ll see ya soon, won’t I, sweetheart?” He sure hopes so, but what if he pushed too hard and Cash runs away? He seemed to be handling it alright, but he’s prickly, and he likes being prickly, so maybe he was just waiting for a chance to get away without leaving Twist to die?

“sure.” That’s an agreement, at least, even if it’s not a very enthusiastic one. Sometimes that’s the best anyone can get from Cash, so Twist should probably leave it at that, but he can’t help but worry.

“Ya sure ‘bout that? Not about ta run off ta that new penthouse of yers an’ put on a few more locks so I can’t get in ‘til I’m up fer a bit more of a challenge?”

“might want to work on making it to your own door before you try to break into mine.” Ooh, that was almost a smile. Twist holds back his own, not wanting to push it. That’s a slightly better way to end the day.

“See ya soon, right?”

“yeah. don’t die.”

“Not plannin’ on it.” That’s about as friendly a farewell as he’s going to get, so it’s just as well that Cash chooses that moment to teleport away. Maybe he’ll feel better after he sleeps. Twist probably won’t, but maybe he at least won’t have to keep those two off each other’s throats.

“Well,” Blackberry huffs, “he certainly is pleasant to have around.”

“He’s tryin’, bro.”

“Really?” He looks skeptical. Understandably, but still-

“Yeah, really. Shoulda seen him earlier, ‘specially when he was yellin’ at Iggy. You’da liked that.” Blackberry smiles a little. “He’s really been helpin’ me, too. I know you’ve seen some’ve it, an’ he’s put up with a lotta shit from me taday. Sorry, stuff. A lotta stuff. I’m really fucked up, bro. Sorry, uh, messed up. Is that…? Yeah, tha’s the word. Good enough. What was I sayin’?”

“That you’re really messed up, which you’re kind of proving at the moment.” Blackberry giggles.

“Yeah, talkin’s not goin’ too good.” Twist smiles too. He’s trying to be serious, but he’s happy to join his brother in a moment of amusement over the nonsense that’s coming out of his mouth. “Really, though, I’m fucked… messed… why’s that word so hard all the sudden? What was I sayin’? I’m messed up. Not jus’ when I talk. ‘s also… messed up? Nah, already said that. Think I need ta sleep.”

“Then go to sleep. Whatever it is can wait until the morning. At this rate, it might be faster to wait until the morning to talk anyway.” Twist chuckles. He’s really not getting anywhere with talking. Unfortunately, what he needs to say is important.

“Listen, bro, it really can’t wait fer the mornin’. What I’m tryin’ ta tell ya is that I’m fucked up. Messed up. My skull is messed up. I think. Does that sound right?”

“It sounds right to me, syntactically, at least.”

“Ok. My skull is messed up. An’ I don’ just mean the nonsense I’m sayin’. More like… ya saw me earlier, saw how much it fu-messed me up phycally… that’s not a word, shit, it’s gettin’ worse, an’ I don’ normally have this kinda trouble talkin’. See, this random shit, stuff, happens all the time, some random symptom that could be a one time deal or could be the start a some new slice’a hell. But I was tryna tell ya somethin’. Got any idea what it was?”

“Something messed up your skull, and something about being messed up ‘phycally,’ whatever that means. Oh! Do you mean ‘physically’?”

“Yeah! Tha’s it. Physically. The medicine messes me up physically, and ‘parently my words, but it also f-messes me up mentally. Like, with memories an’ shit. Things. Whatever. Or it makes shit up. An’ I can’t always tell what’s real, so sometimes I react ta them in ways ya might not like. Sure ya wanna deal with all that?”

“Of course! I mean, not that I want it to happen, but of course I want to take care of you. How could you even ask that?”

“Jus’ don’ wanna upset ya with the things I could do. Just… If I start ta freak ya out, just leave. I’ll come outta it eventually.”

“I absolutely will not leave. What kind of brother would I be if I left you alone to suffer just because you did something that made me uncomfortable?”

“I might make ya more’n ‘uncomfertable’. I’m really fucked up. Messed up. An’ I can’t… I’m probly not gonna be able ta help ya.”

“Well that’s perfectly fine, because I’m here to help you, not the other way around. Honestly, I can’t believe you think I’d leave you alone just because I’m uncomfortable,” Twist opens his mouth to interject, “or more than uncomfortable. I don’t care. I want to take care of you.”

“Ya don’t gotta do that.”

“I want to.”

“It ain’t yer job.”

“Yes it is.”

“But it’s…”

“What, it’s your job to take care of me so I can’t possibly take care of you? You know that’s not true.”

“I know, but…” Twist sighs. “Look, bro, it’s not that I don’ think you c’n take care of me. ‘s jus’ that I don’ want ya runnin’ yerself inta the ground doin’ it. I know you, an’ I know you’ll keep goin’ ‘til ya collapse, an’ I ain’t care of easy – no, tha’s not how words work. Fuck, I need sleep. Wait, sorry, messed, no, tha’s the other thing. That means somethin’ else. I… oh yeah! I ain’t easy ta take care of. Just lookit Cash. That’s after just… what, a day, half a day, maybe, a’ takin’ care of me.”

“I can handle it.”

“I’m sure ya can, but this ain’t no quick fix. Been like this fer a week already, and it’s got no signs of endin’ soon. Ya really wanna take on this job all by yerself?”

“What do you want me to do, bring in a hospital’s nursing staff? Or would you rather a bunch of strangers see how ‘messed up’ you are instead of me?”

“Tha’s not what I meant, bro. ‘s just… don’ work yerself down ta dust over me, please, bro, please. I didn’t do this ta make you do all the work. It was s… s’posed ta…”

“Ok, Papy, ok. I won’t overwork myself. Now please just go to sleep. We can talk about it more in the morning when you’re able to handle a conversation.”

“Ya promise you’ll take care’a yerself?”

“Yes, I promise.”

“Will ya ask fer help if ya need it? I don’ care who finds out wha’s wrong with me, so just ask someone, anyone, when ya need help er a break er somethin’.”

“Of course, brother. If I need help, I’ll ask someone.”

“Ok.” The reassurance is helpful. He should probably get into it more, but keeping his sockets open is getting harder and harder. “Hey, bro?”

“Hmm?”

“Think ya could take these towels off me? I get why they’re here an’ I think they helped, but I’m gettin’ kinda cold now.”

“Oh, of course! I completely forgot!” Blackberry quickly collects all the towels and covers Twist with a blanket. “Is that better?”

“Yeah, feels great. Thanks, bro.”

“Of course. Do you need anything else?”

“Jus’ ta sleep, I think.”

“Alright, I’ll let you sleep, then.”

“How ‘bout you? It’s late, innit? Don’cha need ta sleep too? Ya seemed tired earlier.”

“Oh, no, I’m fine. Not tired at all! You know me, I can stay up half the night with a good book without meaning too.”

“Yeah, me too, normally, but this ain’t normal. How ‘bout ya lay down next ta me in bed? ‘s comfy.” He snuggles down into his pillow to demonstrate, which gets another giggle from his brother.

“I’m sure it is. I’ll go to bed soon, I promise.”

“Ok.” None of that was very believable, but Twist’s sockets are closing whether he wants them to or not, so it will have to do for now. As he drifts towards sleep, a wave of /COMFORT/LOVE/PROTECTION/HOPE/ washes over him, and he smiles. Keeping this is so worth anything he has to do to stay here, and for the first time in days he doesn’t have to convince himself that it’s true.

chapter 16

#twistfell papyrus #twistfell sans #swaptwistfell papyrus #hurt/comfort #internalized victim-blaming #medical experimentation #past trauma

21 notes · View notes

crashdevlin · 6 years ago

Text

New Romantics-6: Longing and Loss

New Romantics Masterlist

Author’s Note: This is a multi-chapter sequel to Wildest Dreams

Summary: Y/n is using her powers for good... isn’t she?

Pairing(s): Dean x Reader, Crowley x Reader, Sam x Reader

Word Count: 4383

Story Warnings: Smut, 18+ HERE BE SEX, DO NOT READ IF YOU’RE A YOUNG’UN!!, anal sex, oral sex (fem and male receiving), vaginal sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, bloodplay, canon-appropriate character deaths, manipulation, BoyKing!Sam and Intended Queen!Reader!

Chapter Warnings: Blood Drinking, unprotected vaginal sex, possessive!Sam

The phone ringing wakes me. It's a persistent buzz against the hard wood of the hotel bedside table. “Don't answer it,” my bed mate says, low voice a deeper rumble from sleep. I didn't know demons could sleep before I started sharing a bed with one.

I raise the phone enough to see the name on the screen. “Gotta. S'Dean” I mumble, as the phone zooms to my hand and the call connects before I've even touched it. I've been expecting this call. It's April. His year's almost up. One last hurrah. “Hey.”

“I wake you?”

I sit up and run my hand across my face. “Don't know what timezone you're in, Winchester, but it's 4:30 in the morning here in Cheyenne.” Shit. Shouldn't have called. comes through to my mind, clear as a bell. “I don't mind, though. I got a few good hours. What's up?”

“I…” Wanna see you before I go to Hell. Just one more time. “Thought we could have that last hurrah. Haven't seen you since Elizabethville. Even went by your place a couple times, but you were never in.”

“I've been keeping busy. Stop too long and it all hits hard. Uh… where are you? Wanna meet somewhere? And… where's Sam?”

“We actually just finished a thing in Pueblo. Sam's looking into last-ditch efforts. Told him I needed a few days, so he's gonna hole up with his laptop and try to find an out that he somehow missed for the last year. Wanna meet halfway? Denver?”

I shoot Crowley a look but he just turns over and grabs a glass of scotch from his side table. “Yeah. I can do that. Biggersons off the interstate?”

“Sounds good. Meet'cha there, Boots.”

I hang up and pull the blanket back, moving for my clothes. “He's doing the rounds, sayin’ ‘Goodbye’?” Crowley asks. I nod. “And, knowing yer not the only one on the tour, you still wanna go?”

“Where's my leg to stand on, Crowley?” I gesture at him. “I have literally been sleeping with the enemy. I should be upset that he's got another bendy bitch he thinks of fondly? Please.”

“And the thief? He wanted her, too. And a hundred other-”

“I have no claim to him. None of it matters. He's dead in two weeks. I can't save him any more than Sam can. But I can make him feel good before the lights go out.”

I dress quickly and check my hair in the ornate mirror by the door before I leave. Crowley likes five star hotels and ancient scotch. He likes Armani suits and shoes made of Italian leather. He's started taking care of every little thing for me and while a big part of me resents it because I'm a grown ass woman and a hunter who doesn't need a demon to take care of me… the other part enjoys sleeping on Egyptian cotton sheets with 1000 thread count, and never worrying about going hungry just because I haven't had any luck hustling lately.

The doorman glares at me on my way out of the hotel and the valet seems to really hate my car, but what can I say? Still a hunter. Demon-fucker, blood-drinker, telepathic and telekinetic, but still a fucking hunter.

I make it to the restaurant in a little over an hour. Dean’s already waiting for me and I notice him before he notices me. He’s tired and scared. He’s clinging to the thought that there’s no way out if he wants to keep Sam alive. I approach with a smile and slide into the booth across from him. He plasters a fake smile on his lips. “Kinky Boots! Lookin’ damn fine for not even sunrise!”

“Wish I could say the same, Winchester, but you look like crap. When’s the last time you slept?” He shrugs. “Nightmares?”

“Well, I got a major league demon holdin’ my contract, one with a big chip on her shoulder about my brother, so she ain’t backin’ down on it. Unless we can figure out a way to put down Lilith in the next two weeks, I’m done, so… sleep doesn’t come easy.”

“Lilith.” I blink at him and lick my lips. “Your contract is held by… Lilith?”

“Yeah. This chick I know went down the same way as me said that, uh, Lilith holds all the contracts.”

“But that would mean she runs the crossroads.” Crowley runs the crossroads.

“I guess so.”

A pit hits my stomach. Of course Crowley’s been lying to me. He’s a fucking demon. Why does it hurt? I force a smile to hide the betrayal I’m feeling. “So… what can I do for you, Dean? Last hurrah, how do you want it?”

I get a flash of a candlelit motel room, soft rhythm and blues playing in the background as he takes his time with me, savoring every inch of my body. There's champagne on the side table for just a second before his mind changes it to a bottle of cheap fruity white zinfandel. Even in his fantasy, he can't go that Nicholas Sparks.

“I'm a simple man with simple tastes. I'm thinkin’ motel room, shades drawn, classic rock on the radio, bottle of whiskey, only leaving the bed for food and water for a few days.” It’s kinda sad that he won’t let himself be soft.

“Well, then we better get some food in us… and some to take with us,” I say with a smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“No more. I can’t…. Need a break,” I breathe out. We've been going for hours, at this point. I've cum three times to his once, but it's just overstimulation by now.

He climbs up my body and smirks down at me. “See, this is what happens when you stop doin’ your yoga. You lose your stamina.”

I don't argue that my stamina is fine, that I'm overworked from the way Crowley took me last night, that if I can keep up with a demon then I can definitely keep up with him… I simply pull his head down and lick into his mouth.

“Ah, I should probably call Sammy, anyway, let him know the Hounds haven't gotten me yet.” Twelve missed calls, at least. He's gotta be losing his mind. “I’m, uh… not gonna tell him who I’m with. Just… I mean, I don’t wanna…”

“I get it. I’ll be quiet. Actually, I’ll take this as an opportunity to hit the bathroom.” I kiss him again and roll off the bed. Dean slaps my ass as I walk away.

“Hey, Sam.”

Through the filter of Dean's mind, I hear Sam's words. “Where the hell are you, Dean? I take a fucking nap and wake up to a note and you don't answer the fucking phone for four hours?”

“Man, I told you. I just needed to have a little fun! It's not even the final countdown. I wanted to have a night without you giving me sad puppy eyes, okay? I think I have earned that.”

“Dean, we have two weeks to figure out how to find Lilith and get her to drop your contract.”

“She's not gonna do that, Sam! We have absolutely no way to find her, let alone force her to give up my freaking soul. Let me have this one thing and then I'll come back and we can go back on soul patrol, all right?”

There was a long moment of silence, then a sigh. “Yeah, okay. Don’t be gone too long, man. I’m gonna call Bobby, see if he’s got anything.”

“Yeah, all right. I’ll call ya when I get out of here.” I walk back out of the bathroom and jump on the bed, wrapping my arms around Dean. He looks into my eyes and smiles. For a moment, there’s no fear in him. It doesn’t last, of course. The man’s going to Hell, and he’s terrified, but for a moment he’s lost in my eyes and it’s amazing.

His hand buries in my hair and he pulls me into a kiss. His tongue doesn't taste like whiskey anymore, just his unique Dean flavor. He's not drunk. He's just vulnerable. When he pulls back, he rests his forehead against mine. “When I go, I need you to take care of Sam. You and Bobby, he's gonna need you or he's gonna lose it.”

“I-”

“Lilith is gonna be after him. She's probably after you, too, since you were on Azazel's short list, too. I just need you to watch his back. If you gotta do that from his bed, more power to the power couple.”

I scoff and pull away, bringing my knees up to my chest. “Did you call me here for this? To fuck me, then chase me off to be with Sam?”

Confusion fills him as he debates whether or not that’s what he’s trying to do. “That’s not what I meant. Sometimes, I wish you still had your powers, ‘cause you could hear what I-”

I shake my head. “I don’t think you know what you meant, Winchester.” He agrees. He doesn’t know what he wants. He doesn’t want me with Sam, wants me to have something real, but he doesn’t want either of us to be alone once he goes to Hell. “Maybe I should leave.”

“No, don’t go. I’m sorry. Don’t leave.” He sighs. His eyebrows come together as he pushes his hand into my hair. “Whatever happened with your salesman?”

“I told you it wasn’t anything real, Dean.”

He licks his lips. “Sorry. You should definitely have something real.”

“Like I could have with Sam?” I guess. He nods. I shake my head. “No. Much as I enjoy your brother...Things with my salesman are more real than what I have with Sam. At least he doesn’t think I belong with him because the Yellow-eyed Demon said so.” I scoff. “Azazel would probably hate my salesman.” I don’t know why I like calling him ‘my salesman’ so much, but it feels right. He definitely sold me on a bunch of things I never would’ve considered a year ago.

“Look, promise me that you will, at least, keep tabs on Sam. Try to keep him from going too far off the rails?” Please. If Sam gets himself killed then this was all fucking pointless. “I just… the whole point of this is to keep Sam alive.”

Dean Winchester tends to say what's on his mind when it comes to me and I like that. I like that he doesn't know that I'm still in his head so he doesn't try to keep shit inside. Dean is one of the most uniquely honest liars I've ever met. He lies to himself a lot, but he tries not to lie to me.

I nod. “Yeah, okay. I'll try.”

“Thank you.” He pulls me into another kiss and I melt into it, letting him lay me down and cover my body with his own. I let him take comfort in me one last time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I take a hunt in California, then I head home. By the time I make it back to Keystone, it’s the morning of May 4. Crowley’s waiting for me, leaning against my porch with his hands in his pockets. My nonchalant demon salesman. I get out of my car and lean against the hood, ignoring the heat from the engine. “He make it downstairs?”

“‘Bout thirty hours ago… been months already for ‘im.”

“I forgot. Time’s wonky down there, isn’t it?”

“Hell’s designed to fuck with your head… and body, and soul. I wasn’t there for more than a year before I was a demon, pet. That’s quite a lot longer down there, but…” He shrugs and starts toward me. “Have you broken that trap, yet?”

I shake my head. “I like having a place where you won’t go.” He grabs my hips and pulls me away from my car. This is where he snaps my jeans off and fucks me… usually. I slap his hands away. “We need to talk about Lilith.”

Crowley rolls his eyes at me. “Are you sure you want to talk about Lilith? It’s been weeks since you’ve seen me. I thought you might need a top-up.”

“I’ve been rationing. I’ve still got a fourth of a bottle left,” I say, smugly. “Lilith. Spill.”

“What? What do you want to know?”

“Lilith holds all crossroad contracts. I thought you were King of the Crossroads.”

“I am… but everyone has a boss.”

“And Lilith’s your boss.”

“Yes, and no. Tol’ you she took over after Azazel went. She sits on the throne, so it’s her name on the scrolls. That’s it. I’m in charge of the Crossroads,” he insists.

I lick my lips, search his eyes, finally sigh. Even if he’s lying, I can’t tell. Even if he’s lying, what could I do about it? I need his blood. That quarter of a vial of blood isn’t gonna last very long. He can see my resistance fade. I can see it in his smile as he steps closer and grabs my hips. I’ve gotten used to the sulfur taste in his mouth, I like to chase it around with my tongue.

He pushes me back against my hood. It’s still burning hot, but all I can focus on is his hands pushing my shirt up over my breasts, his hard cock rutting against my thigh. He quickly pulls my bra down and starts licking and biting my nipple. I lean back to give him better access, using my powers to pop the button of his suit pants and pull the zipper down. He pulls back, pops the button on my jeans and pulls them and my underwear down my legs.

I turn quickly and set my hands on the hot metal hood. Crowley slips a hand down my ass and slips two fingers inside of me. “Oh, fuck.”

“Are you always this wet? Because every time I touch you, you are.”

I drop my head to the backs of my hands and moan in response as he fucks those fingers in and out of me. He pulls them away and immediately replaces them with the head of his cock. That beautiful, huge fucking cock. Honestly, if I didn’t know that the man he wears used to be a literary agent, I’d swear he must’ve been a porn star because that cock… That cock is amazing. “Foot on the bumper,” he instructs and I obey. Dear God, I don’t even consider not doing what he says.

He slides in, one hand on my hip, the other grabbing my shoulder to hold me in place. It’s moments like this, when he’s fucking me over the hood of my car and my moans are echoing through the trees surrounding my house, that I consider breaking the Devil’s Trap under my house. I want him to take me in my bed, where I’m comfortable, but I can’t let him.

I have to have that space. That space untainted by demons and blood. Hell, I don’t even drink his blood in the house. I leave it in the car. That house, it’s got memories of Sam, of Dean and John. It’s got memories of the years I was normal. I can’t let Crowley corrupt that when he’s already corrupted me.

“Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck!” I moan as he picks up his speed.

“Louder!”

My pussy clenches hard at his demand, and I start moaning louder. It’s fucking early in the day to be screaming, but it’s not like I have neighbors to worry about. “Please, Crowley! Please, fuck, please! Please, harder. God, I need it.” His grip on me tightens and he hammers into me harder, his cock hitting my cervix over and over. I scream, slapping the hood and shuddering as my muscles tighten and flutter around him. He fucks me through it, pulsing as he hits his own orgasm and fills me up.

He pulls away from me and snaps his fingers and we’re both dressed. I turn to him and lick my lips. “So, uh… I still have some left, but-”

“Of course, darling.” He produces another small glass bottle full of his blood and presents it to me. I take it and immediately shove it in my pocket. “Til next time.”

“Yeah.” I nod and head toward my place. He’s gone by the time I get to the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hear the engine rumbling down the dirt road to my house at a little before 5pm. That loud 502 big block is unmistakable. It used to be that sound would denote Dean’s arrival, but I know it’s Sam behind the wheel tonight. I open the front door as Sam slams the driver’s door and stumbles toward the porch. He’s drunk, I can smell the whiskey. I rush to his side, trying to help him stay upright. I can’t believe he was driving like this.

“Sam!”

“He’s dead. Dean’s dead. I couldn’t save him.”

“So, that's reason to drink yourself to death?” I snap, trying to wrap him around me and get him into my place. He stumbles on the stairs, dropping away from me, his large body hurtling toward the wood of the porch, face-first. I put my hands out on instinct to stop him, but not with my muscles because I know I can lift that two-forty body without help. I use my powers without a thought and he’s left floating two inches over the porch.

He slowly sets his palms against the wood, drops his knees and turns his head to look at me. His eyes are wide and I can see that adrenaline has burned some of the liquor out of his blood. For the moment, he’s lucid, and he knows. I drop him and he turns his whole body, sits on the steps and looks up at me. “You still have your powers?”

I shake my head. “I got them back,” I whisper.

“You got… you got them back? When? How?”

I swallow and lick my lips. “Uh… the day I disappeared in Lincoln.”

“This whole year? You… why didn’t you say anything?”

I take a deep breath. “Because I’ve been… This is really a conversation for us to have when you’re sober.”

“I’m sober enough,” he growls, standing and using his height to try to intimidate me. “Fuckin’ tell me. Tell me how you got the powers back.”

I look up into his eyes and steel myself. “How’d we get ‘em the first time?” He blinks a few times, then his eyebrows pull down tightly. I reach into my pocket and pull out the little glass bottle.

He snatches the bottle from my hand and raises it to his eyes. “Is this-?”

“Yeah. It’s… it isn’t Azazel’s so it doesn’t work quite the way it should… I have to keep drinking it or the powers fade. I’ve been trying to cut back. I… I don’t like relying on… him. I mean, it, the demon.”

“You… you’ve been drinking demon blood?”

I grab the bottle back and shove it into my pocket. “Yes.”

“For a year? Who’s been giving it to you?”

“Just this crossroads demon I know. He… wants to help.”

“Yeah. Ruby says that, too. But she couldn't help me save Dean.”

“Dean was going down, Sam. There was no stopping it. We all tried.”

“Did you? Because while me and Bobby were trying to keep him from being taken, you weren’t around much!”

I turn a glare on him. “Yeah, what did you expect me to do, Sam? Stick around and be the rope in your little game of Tug-of-War? I heard your thoughts in Lincoln, Sam, and in Elizabethville. You think I’m yours, but Dean’s the one that actually wanted me for something more than my body. He wanted me to have something real. I heard his thoughts, too.” I roll my eyes. “I tried. If I could have kept him from going to Hell, I would have.”

“You think I only want you for your-”

“I’ve heard your thoughts, Sam!” I exclaim. “It’s all ‘Mine’ this and ‘Don’t touch her’ that. You haven’t had those complimentary thoughts since before that night in Lincoln. It’s all possessiveness and-”

“You’re supposed to be mine.”

“Just because Azazel wanted me to be your queen and right-hand woman doesn’t mean-”

“Yes, it does!” His hand shoots out and grabs my hair, pulling me closer. He’s breathing hard, his breath smells like whiskey, and his mind has that swimmy feeling of drunkness coming back, and maybe I’m getting a contact high from his mind, because the way he’s looking at me makes me feel swimmy, too. “You are mine. Not Dean’s. Not your traveling salesman and not that fucking demon’s. Understand?”

I open my mouth to respond but he crashes our faces together, biting my lips and licking into my mouth. His free hand grabs at my waist, pulls my shirt up. I whine and pull away. “Not out here, Sam. Inside,” I whisper. I entwine my fingers with his and pull him toward the front door. He stumbles but he doesn’t fall this time. I push him to sit on the couch and he pulls me to straddle his lap.

Mine. There’s no yielding in the thought. No question. He’s resolute.

I nod. Yours. I push the word into his head. It’s been a while since I’ve done it and I don’t know if it works, but he seems to get it.

He grabs my head with both of his large hands and pulls me into another harsh kiss. He moves to bite my neck and shoulder and the pain zings through my body, settling into a throbbing between my legs. Tell me about the blood. Tell me what you can do.

I moan as he keeps attacking my skin with his mouth and teeth. “It started w-with the te-telepathy and… fuck, Sam.” He growls into my neck and I whimper. “Um, the-the telekinesis came back quick, too. And then… then the demon started to show me h-how to perform exorcisms with my mind.” He pulls back and looks into my eyes, questioning. “Yeah. It’s… kinda like what Ava was doing with the Acheri in Cold Oak. It’s like controlling them. I can force them out of their vessels and direct them back down to Hell.”

“And the vessel?”

“As long as the demon hasn’t ridden ‘em too hard, they live.”

“So, this crossroads demon has been helping you save people?”

I nod. “He’s… he’s a demon, so he doesn’t do it for free,” I whisper, avoiding his eyes.

Sam’s jaw tightens. Knew you were fucking him. “Not anymore. If it’s really worth it-” he starts, grabbing my jaw and forcing me to look at him. “-we’ll find another demon to get the blood from.”

“We?”

He slips his hand in my pocket and pulls out the bottle. “Show me,” he says twisting the top off and offering the bottle to me.

I swallow, nervously, and take it from his hand. “I started with one drop.” I dab a drop on my finger and show it to him. “That’s all it took at the beginning. I need a lot more now, but… that first drop, I could hear everything again.” I lick my lips as his eyes focus on my bloodied finger.

“How fast does it work?”

“Few minutes… but the powers, they take work. Just like when Azazel was still around, it takes effort. It takes time,” I answer.

“Do you think we could use this, the powers, to get Lilith?” His mind flashes to Lilith, in Ruby’s vessel, letting in the hound that tore Dean to pieces.

“Yeah. The demon said that eventually they’ll be strong enough to kill demons, but the amount of blood I’d need to drink to get there would be-” He cuts me off by licking my finger into his mouth. He sucks hard on my finger before pulling it from his mouth and grabbing my hips.

I set the bottle on the coffee table and turn back to Sam. It doesn’t take long for his pupils to shrink and his breathing to go hard. I remember this feeling, this very first high. Everything is enhanced, everything is lovely and scary. His fingers tighten around my hips. “This… is…” he starts.

I nod. I know, Sammy.

“We’re gonna need more,” he growls.

“Yeah.” The word is just a breath as he starts to pull at my clothing.

“You’re gonna help me avenge Dean.” He pulls my shirt over my head and drops it to the ground next to the couch. It takes just a few minutes for him to have me folded in half on his lap, my feet on his shoulders and his cock buried in me, thumb rubbing my clit. “You’re gonna teach me how to use those powers… and we’re going to kill Lilith.”

“Yes. Yes.” I’m shaking. He’s barely moving inside of me, just rocking me on his lap, but it feels so good just to be so fucking full of Sam. “We’re gonna kill Lilith.”

“Good girl, y/n.”

He starts bouncing me on his cock and I feel so fucking small with how he’s manhalding me and my eyes roll back in my head. I start rambling out ‘fuck’ and ‘yes’ and ‘oh, god’, but Sam doesn’t say a word. His mind is full of those possessive thoughts. He’s thinking about killing Lilith, yes, but he’s thinking about how I take him so perfectly, how I’m made for him, how we were supposed to be together. He thinks about how he wishes he had met me without Dean and John, how he wishes he didn’t have the memories of watching them fuck me, but eventually comes to the conclusion that it doesn’t matter. John and Dean are dead. I’m his.

I’m yours. I think at him through my moans.

“No more demon dick,” he growls and I nod. “Mine.” He twists and lays me down on the couch, hammering into me like he's gonna win a prize. He cums quickly, the enhanced sensation from the demon blood high overwhelming him. He pulls out and kisses me before looking in my eyes. “When can we start?”

KITCHEN SINK TAGS @heyitscam99 @wonderlandfandomkingdom @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt @mrs-meghan-winchester @henrymorganme @lonely-skys @allykat2108 @mogaruke @flamencodiva @team-free-will-you-idjits-67 @pisces-cutie @paintballkid711 @natura1phenomenon @rainbowkisses31 @atc74 @alagalaska @coffee-obsessed-writer @bamby0304 @ilovefanfic86 @sculptorofbeginnings @rainflowermoon @bunnybaby121115 @imperiusimpala

HUNTER TAGS @letsby @mrswhozeewhatsis @spnskinnyballs @deansenwackles @gayspacenerd @thewhiterabbit42 @dolphincliffs @sandlee44 @covered-byroses

GAGA FOR GREEN EYES TAGS @akshi8278 @adoptdontshoppets

#cassie writes stuff #spn #spn fanfic #sam/reader #dean/reader #crowley/reader #demon blood #boyking!sam #lemon

102 notes · View notes

delightfulmiraclecrusade-blog · 6 years ago

Text

Manipulate My Decisions

"Hello New York!"

The crowd went wild of the sight of the raven haired beauty up there on stage. Bandages covering his eyes, a miracle that he could see where he was taking a step. Weird. That was the thought that he first seen that God on stage. The corners of his lips curled up into a small smirk as he gazed up at Rivalle. The name of the performer on stage. Most likely a stage name and nothing else. The male was short, it was the most noticeable feature that he. Still is actually. A blond with a bowl hair cut was jumping beside him, jumping with most of his clothing the same as his own it seemed. Everyone looked overall, proud and happy that they'd been able to catch the Japanese beauty up in stage with his pale fingers wrapped around the black microphone.

"Rivalle!"

The male's name was called over the quiet music. It wasn't going to be quiet for long. After all, this was a concert. Nothing was ever quiet during a concert. Even communicating a simple 'I Have To Get Closer!' Or 'I Need To Go To The Bathroom.' Was harder to say if you were with a group. Like Eren was currently. Mikasa, who was beside him jumping up and down with the others. In all honesty, the brunette had surprised most people in their group. Since in the past, Mikasa had practically dragged the young punk to his first ever concert that Eren had ever gone to of this man. Back then, there was an entire group. 'No Name' or something similar. But, since the demand for 'Rivalle' was so high. They seemed to do a full album with just his songs. No 'Hanji' or the other male in the band. Seemed that they all supported the tour. Yes, Tour. This wasn't the only concert. The male would be traveling around the globe sadly. And away from his home town.

"Let's Get This Concert Started!"

That was all it took for the lights to dim and the screaming to get louder then anything in the world for a moment before it quieted down. Only the extreme fangirls yelling out, chanting the young star's name. His friends that had tagged along, were the infamous Freckled Horse Couple. Jean and Marco. Even with a broken arm, the most freckled and kindest in the group had came along to this concert. Showed the dedication he had for 'Rivalle's Songs' It Seemed. Next, Was Mikasa and Armin. The bowl-cut haired boy beside him that was previously jumping like a rabbit in so much excitement. Another die-hard fan of 'No Name' in general. Another couple that had decided to come along with them, forming a seven-person group. It was the Bald Pringles couple. As the others liked to tease them. But, they never complained about the nickname for them. If anything, they fueled the fire for the name to be used more and more. For more laughs of course.

"I Wanna Follow Where He Goes, I Think About Him And He Knows It."

The smirk playing on his lips only widened at those words. Bringing back the memories of after the last show. One moment by one moment.

"I Wanna Let Him Take Control, 'Cause Everytime He Gets Close Yeah.."

It was about a year ago, the fifth 'No Name' Concert. Fueling their careers on faster and farther then they'd ever expected. It had to be the melodic tune of Levi Ackerman's Voice that made it happen. Who couldn't just sit there beside the god for hours, just listening to him even list off the ingredients off of a grocery list would be enough for Girls to start attacking the young pop star in less then five seconds. Gay guys would probably say the same thing. Men would kill to have that voice. And Chicks would kill to wake up to that voice each morning. Well, Eren wasn't even exaggerating at that point. That year, He was also taken to that concert. Dragged to it by none other then Mikasa, his step-sister. Who, he'd admit, had a bit of an obsession with 'No Name' just from one glance at her bedroom, would be easy to see.

"He Pulls Me In Enough To Keep Me Guessin', And Maybe I Should Stop And Start Confessin'"

A day or two before the concert, Eren had actually went to one of the nearby Internet cafés in the area where his university was in. Shingeki University, if he remembered it correctly. It was an English-Japanese university. Where a lot of students where. It wasn't too hard or too easy passing the classes. Just right for people like himself. Who got, overall decent grades. Bs and Cs mostly. A rare A once in a while. Well, that was in high school, but the point was already made. A male was seated in the corner of the café, A cafe something along the lines of Wings. Or Freedom. He couldn't refer the full name.

"Confessin' Yeah.."

Eren had gotten his latte, asking the male if the seat parallel to him was open. Since, The Café was apparently a beehive with every single bee inside. Hiding from the rain that would've been pelleting down. Then again, there might've been a test coming soon for another major. Making everyone there most likely cramming for a test that was coming up. Then again, The male normally didn't pay much attention to the dates that tests were set on. The raven haired male that had a light gray scarf pulled up to his nose was probably cramming too, was what Eren had assumed. Not so far fetched.

"Oh! I've been shakin, I love it when you go crazy!"

The brunette couldn't remember what in the heavens inspired him to strike up a normal conversation with the male. Who, overall, looked like he was freezing with the along of layers it seemed he had on. It was just muscle. But, he couldn't have known at that time. Who would've? A Five-Foot Three tall male wouldn't even look scary or someone that could work out for as long as an athlete. Then again, it was simply his own opinion. His opinions were never good anyways. The two males had began chatting with one another, long enough for the shorter of the two to soon close his laptop. Getting a better view of this emerald orbed beauty before him. Two strangers talking as if they've known each other for years and just reunited was something possibly unthinkable. But, it was possible. Even if it was unthinkable.

"You take all my inhibitions, Baby there's nothin' holding me back!"

The next day or so, the concert had began. With all three of the members of 'No Name' were on that big stage. Preforming to their heart's content. The melodic voice of the main singer bowing most of the audience away. Eren, being the male that wasn't extremely interested in pop. Wasn't one of those die-hard hands. Yet. So, finding something for him to do during the time filled with screeching, woman's ovaries exploding and the music that group produced. The raven hair styled into an undercut that the young-looking main singer had gave him a small pang of déjà vu in the back of his head. But, the male couldn't connect the obvious. Who could in the first place?

"You take me places that tear up my reputation.."

The two had met up in that coffee shop the morning after the show. Fate possibly? Neither believed that word. Or the meaning behind it. A fact they both learned on their seemingly second meeting. When, it was actually their third meeting. The raven haired male seemed a bit relaxed, the amount of people in the crowd that was in the venue that they had rented seemed to cover up the taller of the two. Making it seem like Eren hadn't actually been there. Which meant that the secret of his pop star life stays a secret for the moment. Levi Ackerman not being 'Rivalle' the pop star that was currently still in the spotlight. Loving that Levi Ackerman actually had someone to talk to that wasn't a therapist that knew of his pop star life. Of course, there was Hanji and Mike. But, there was so much comfort that those two could give the young pop star.

"Manipulate my decisions, Baby there's nothin' holdin' me back."

Soon enough, Eren's Punk persona was found out and took up a bit of their conversations in that cafe. Where they almost always meet up when their schedules fit it. Between classes, studio sessions and friends, it wasn't that easy. But, neither of them new of each other's lives. To Levi, Eren was A simple collage student. An 'Art Major'. Eren's own words. And, To Eren, Levi was a simple Collage student aswell. From a different collage then his own. A 'Music' Major. Nothing more was said, nothing less. By their fourth month of knowing each other. The two were practically inseparable. How a simple meeting at an Internet café could go into such a good friendship.

"There's nothin' holding me back, There's nothin' holding me back!"

Yet, there was one thing that they haven't exactly thought about during their friendship was still developing each and everyday. Their friends. Somehow, they had gotten weird the last few days. Eren saying a subtle 'No' To graffiti? The thing he was almost always recommending they would do. Levi, saying 'No' to cleaning their penthouse and simply leaving it? The raven would usually clean the house three, four times a day before even thinking about leaving it. But, those two didn't care it seemed. Both were struck by Cupid's arrow easily.

"'Cause if we lost our minds and we took it way too far, I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright.."

One day, Eren had decided to get out of that café and go somewhere else with Levi. A friend that was now closer to him then Mikasa and Armin put together. Dragging the older of the two along with hm, his tanned fingers wrapped around Levi's wrist. Weaving through the crowds of people easily, one of them having laughter bubble past his lips while his shorter friend was rolling his eyes but smiling still a bit. Feeling overall content with following after the younger male, dressed in black along with multiple piercings. But, personally, those eyes were the most interesting of all.

"If you were by my side and we stumbled in the dark, I know we'd be alright.."

The twos feet took them to a club. Letting them party there for a bit. A bit meaning about two hours. Until eleven at night. Both had gotten drunk that night. And, learned that one liked wine more while the other enjoyed beer more. You can only guess who liked what more at the bar. Both of them had also been more of the touchy feely kind of drunks on the dance floor, chuckling and letting loose. Both of them having the best night of their lives together. Though, they didn't go much farther then that. Not yet at least.

"'Cause if we lost our minds and we took it way too far, But I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright.."

They both stumbled around the alleyways. Giggling and chuckling with one another as they made their way back to Levi's shared penthouse with the other's. Somehow, Hanji was Held back by Mike and didn't go off attacking their star singer. But, they had also gotten the wrong image after the two had stumbled on top of the L-couch. Eren had fallen down first before Levi followed. Both of the. Passing out a couple moments later, both sleeping silently without a single worry in the world.

"If You Were By My side and we stumbled in the dark, I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright."

And the rest? Is history.

"Oh, I've been shakin' I love it when you go crazy You take all my inhibitions Baby, there's nothin' holding me back You take me places that tear up my reputation Manipulate my decisions Baby, there's nothin' holding me back There's nothin' holding me back I feel so free when you're with me, baby Baby, there's nothin' holding me back!"

And with that last verse. The ravenette's hand pointed out wards me, a faint smile appearing on his lips as he gazed at me. Even with those bandages wrapped around his eyes. Their love definitely shown more then the bug star on stage. At least, in Eren's mind.

#ereri fanfic #ereri fic #ereri #eren jaeger #levi ackerman #no name #aot #snk #songfic

2 notes · View notes

paigenotblank · 7 years ago

Text

A Family Tradition

Pairing: Ten x Rose

Rating: General Audiences

written for @doctorroseprompts 31 Days of Ficmas (day 14 - family)

AO3 TS

“Rooooose. Do we have to go?” The Doctor was following Rose around their bedroom as she collected dirty laundry and pushed it into a bag.

She stopped mid stuff. “I promised Mum.”

“You know how Jackie is, she probably doesn’t even want me there. How about I take you and--”

“Stop it.” Rose rolled her eyes and bent down to retrieve a pair of knickers. “She specifically asked if you were coming and I told her that we both would help with the Christmas biscuits this year. ‘Sides, it’s one of our only family traditions. We do it every year, and I missed last year ‘cos of...well, you know…” She still had trouble talking about his regeneration and those first few hours after. “Anyway, I really want to.”

“You don’t think it’s suspicious that she asked about me specifically? Maybe she’s plotting to--”

“Doctor. She always asks after you.”

His eyes widened. “She does?”

“Don’t be daft, of course she does.”

He took a dramatic breath. “Very well, if we must.”

Rose tried to hide her smile. “That’s very magnanimous of you. And don’t worry, I’ll make it worth your while.”

He snagged her around the waist and pulled her flush against him. “Oh, you will, will you?”

She giggled. “That too, but I meant I’d make sure there’re enough biscuits to bring some home with us.” The Doctor grinned and bent down to kiss Rose, but she pulled back. “Later we can snog as much as you’d like...among other things. But first, it’s time to go to Mum’s.”

“Rose, we have a time machine.”

“I know what you’re doin’ an’ it’s not gonna work. We’re goin’ to Mum’s. Now.”

He mumbled, “Just wanted to enjoy the morning with my favorite human.”

Rose smirked. “What happened to, ‘there’s no morning on the TARDIS, Rose’?”

He shoved his hands into his pockets with a pout. “I guess I’ll just go...and pilot us to your Mum’s.”

She yelled after him, “I love you!”

Rose bit back her smile and finished gathering her clothes.

Fifteen minutes later, Rose and the Doctor were elbow deep in biscuit dough. Rose was trying to dust the Doctor with flour and he was trying to steal pieces of the still sticky dough. He snagged a bit and popped it in his mouth.

“Doctor! There’s raw egg in that.” Rose said it in concern, even as she lifted her flour covered hands toward his perfectly styled hair.

He caught her wrists in his hands. “Superior physiology, Rose Tyler.” He pulled her closer and tried to steal a kiss whilst avoiding her attempt at flouring. She was giggling and struggling to reach any part of him with her hands.

“Oi! Children the both of ya.” The Doctor took one look at Jackie holding a rolling pin, eyes narrowed, and jumped away from her daughter. “I’ll just finish this up then, won’t I?” She grabbed the bowl of dough sitting precariously on the counter and handed the rolling pin off to the Doctor. “Rose, sweetheart, there’s dough chilling in the fridge. You and himself can roll it and cut the shapes out. There’re cutters on the counter over there.”

Rose took the chilled dough out of the fridge and brought it over to the Doctor who promptly began rolling it out. While he was doing that, she dug through a bag with different shaped biscuit cutters. She pulled out two people shaped cutter as well as a tree, a santa hat, a star, and gift box. She gasped causing both Jackie and the Doctor to look in her direction. She didn’t notice, however, so surprised as she was by a rather large, plastic biscuit cutter. “Mum, where’d you get this?”

Jackie smiled while adding more flour to the mixing bowl. “There’s a place ‘round the corner that does up custom shaped cutters. Just bring ‘em a picture. Had Mickey print one out for me. Thought that one,” she pointed her spoon at the Doctor. “...might like it.”

Rose cradling it in her hand, brought it over to show the Doctor.

He picked it up and turned toward Jackie. “That’s the TARDIS!”

Jackie shrugged. “If Bev can have her Yorkie done, figured I can get them to do a police box for you.”

“I...you...but...” The Doctor was stunned. “This is for me?”

Jackie walked over to the two of them and rested one hand on her hip. “Well, what would I want with biscuits that look like police boxes?”

The Doctor impulsively hugged Jackie. “Thank you.”

Jackie sniffed and whispered in his ear. “Thank you for makin’ my Rose so happy.”

When they pulled apart, Rose sidled up next to the Doctor and snaked her arm around his waist. “Thanks, Mum.”

Jackie smiled at her daughter. “Well, you don’t seem to be getting rid of him anytime soon, besides a woman could do worse for a son-in-law. Katherine from the pub, her daughter--”

“Mum! We haven’t gotten married!”

“Oh, I know that. And with the way you two are always runnin’ about, chasin’ after squid people or giant warthogs and whatnot, ’s not like I’m holdin’ my breath you ever will either. But it doesn’t make him any less family does it?”

Rose glanced at the Doctor with his mouth hanging open, then back to her mum with a brilliant smile. “No. It doesn’t.”

Rose wrapped her arms around the Doctor’s neck and kissed him.

Jackie swiped at an errant tear. “Right then, enough of that. Biscuits won’t make themselves.”

Rose and the Doctor pulled apart wearing identical grins. He snatched the TARDIS biscuit cutter from Rose’s hand. “I get to do the TARDIS ones.”

#ten x rose #doctorroseprompts #31 days of ficmas #family #the doctor gets a surprise #Jackie loves her unofficial son-in-law

24 notes · View notes

snowkatze · 8 years ago

Text

The Potential Future

I have written this One Shot based on “Ease” by Troye Sivan, as requested by @painting-with-rainbows. Lyrics in cursive.

I'm down to my skin and bone And my mommy, she can't put down the phone And stop asking how I'm doing all alone, alone But the truth is the stars are falling, ma And the wolves are out c-calling, ma And my home has never felt this far

His hands tighten around the steering wheel. They feel colder than they did before, but that might just be due to the ice freezing his lonely heart. A stunning awareness has taken grip of his mind. He had it coming all along. A thing like this ought to happen.

After all, he is Baz Pitch. The only person he can rely on is his family. Well. That's what they say. The truth is that he can't even rely on them. He's all on his own, with no friend in the world. He should've known that it was too good, he was too lucky. That really should've made him suspicious because whenever something remotely nice ever happens in his life, the universe rips it away from him. That's just the way it works. Baz' soul is doomed and all the happiness that is granted to him will inevitably be taken from him. There is no kindness, only pain.

Now he simply feels like a fool for ever believing he could have that chance and a normal life. Then again, maybe this is normal. This is what happens to usual people in usual relationships. Perhaps that makes it even worse: Baz is nothing special.

As Baz is driving, with no aim and no orientation, he has no idea where to go. He doesn't know where the road will lead. And it's not only the car. He has lost all perspective and purpose. All his dreams are gone, just like that. Because all dreams he ever had involved Simon Snow.

There's a storm going on outside. Snow keeps blowing against the window. But he can't think to drive careful, even though the road is slippery. There's no one who'd ask him to pay attention.

And he's also so angry. He trusted him. He trusted him so much, he didn't even see the signs. They were all there and Baz was so in love, he ignored them all.

His breathing gets heavier and suddenly he feels tears in his eyes. No. He blinks vividly. Stop it. Don't do this to me. I won't cry.

Why now of all times? Baz' life has been a wreck for years and he trained himself not to cry, not to show a hint of emotion. So why now? Has he let his guard down, being Simon's boyfriend? Has Simon changed him? Probably. Simon is who lured him out of his shell.

But that was a mistake. He needs to build all the walls up again, just to protect himself and all the others.

I trusted you. Why would you do this to me?

It was all just lies and pretending. But then again, Baz knows Simon, and he knows that Simon is not that kind of person. He wouldn't have done it without reason. Perhaps it's just impossible to love Baz Pitch. And maybe it simply took Simon long to realize that.

Quickly Baz wipes away the disturbing tears and concentrates back on the road.

I guess I can't hold it against you, then. That's just what happens when you get together with a monster. (So maybe you believe me after all that that's what I am.)

The phone on the front seat beside Baz rings again. It's Simon.

Does he feel guilty now? Does he want to apologize for not breaking it off before he did it? Or does he just want to tell me to go to hell? Maybe that's where I'm headed. I don't know.

Whatever it is, Baz doesn't want to hear it. Not now when he can't keep his damn emotions in check and has no bloody control over himself. Next time he sees Simon, he'll really make an appearance. He'll be his old self again, and not even Simon will be able to look past that mask.

That is, after he cried for hours and had a lot of ice cream and watched a lot of shitty movies. That's what the normal people do, isn't it? But then again, they probably have somebody to do it with. It's no fun all alone. And also, that's not how Pitches deal with stuff like that.

Yes, maybe he has changed. Maybe Simon has moved something inside of him. But that was all Simon's fault and now that he's gone, there's nothing he can live by anymore. All that mattered once suddenly doesn't anymore. And it's pathetic. He can't let this shake him. And most of all, he can't show how much it does in front of Simon.

Baz had really considered himself a better person now. He has been starting to believe that he is worth the love. But now that he knows that Simon just lied to him, how can he carry on?

But that's not what your mother taught you, isn't it?, a voice in his head whispers. Baz frowns and stares straight ahead. She had told him to always stay true to himself. No matter what happens. And Baz would like to think that after all this time, he's grown so much as a person that he won't fall back. He's not the person he once was and the person he is now will get over it.

But why does it have to hurt so much? To know that he doesn't mean as much to Simon as Simon means to him?

Baz takes another breath and adjusts himself.

Take me back to the basics and the simple life Tell me all of the things that make you feel at ease Your touch, my comfort, and my lullaby Holdin' on tight and sleepin' at night Holdin' on tight and sleepin' at night

Couldn't Simon at least have tried to stay friends with him? The truth is, most probably, that Simon doesn't want that. Baz still wishes that wasn't the case. At that very moment, Baz isn't able to imagine a life without Simon.

As he stares into the storm, barely able to see the road in all the fog, he thinks of all the things that were and will never be again. Things he will miss, probably forever. Perhaps that's not as bad a thing as Baz thinks it is. Memories should be cherished. Baz can save them and lock them away in his heart. At least he still got them.

Memories of countless evenings when they laid in each others arms. When Simon looked at him with love and whispered things. When he told him that everything would be alright.

Baz will probably miss that forever. But then a thought occurs to him and he sits up a little straighter.

This has nothing to do with him. This happens to normal people. This doesn't mean that Simon sees him as a monster. He just somehow fell out of love. And that's okay. Simon is allowed to find happiness with someone else. Baz always just wants what's best for Simon. And if that's what's best for him, so be it. Baz only wishes Simon had just told him instead of having to find out like that.

Of course, Baz grew suspicious when Simon wasn't sad at all that Baz was going to leave for a week to visit his family. And he had been awfully distracted lately. Always texting someone... But only today Baz had witnessed him sneaking out of their neighbors flat.

Obviously, Baz didn't want to jump to conclusions. So he wanted to confront their neighbor (who is terribly good-looking, much to Baz' distress) but instead overheard him talking to somebody. Baz heard him say how he waited for his boyfriend to break up with whoever they were officially together with at the moment.

That's how Baz found out that Simon had been cheating on him. After all, he hadn't been aware that their neighbor was dating anyone, but apparently he was the only fool who hadn't known.

And he just had to leave, without a word to Simon, and he just drove away with no aim.

Maybe he was hoping to find something, anything, just a clue as to what to do now. His whole world has broken apart.

But all this driving Is driving me crazy And all this moving Is proving to get the best of me And I've been trying to hide it But lately Every time I think I'm better Pickin' my head up, getting nowhere Take me back to the basics and the simple life Tell me all of the things that make you feel at ease Your touch, my comfort, and my lullaby Holdin' on tight and sleepin' at night

Baz makes a decision. He'll go back and talk about things, even if it will break his heart. He can't just run away from the situation. He has to face the truth, even if he doesn't like it. Maybe he won't have to say good-bye to Simon completely. Perhaps they really can stay friends.

Just because Simon has stopped liking him like that, it doesn't mean he has stopped liking him altogether.

Come on, Baz. You are brave now. You can do this.

So Baz turns the car and starts driving back home.

I've been lyin' to them all I don't need it anymore Don't you worry about me I'll be fine if I can breathe I've been out here for too long Taking shit for how I'm wrong How I'm wrong Always wrong

Soon enough, Baz pulls into the drive-way. He's scared to go in, but this is his home and he has to one way or another. He is scared of the things Simon will say.

Be brave. You can do this. You are a bigger person than you were before.

So he knocks because somehow that's the only thing that feels right. Immediately, the door is pulled open and Simon looks at him, his hair all messed up.

For a second, Baz is overwhelmed by the urge to touch his hair, but he knows that he can't.

“I came to talk,” Baz says and lifts his head.

Simon looks like he's about to cry.

“Where were you?” “I just needed some space.” Simon hugs himself as if he's freezing and Baz wants to pull him close.

“Why?” “You know why.” “No, I don't. Come on, Baz, you just vanished. How am I supposed to know what's going on?” I wish I could hug you.

“I'm not a complete idiot, you know. I know what you've been up to.” Simon looks instantly surprised and gasps shortly.

“You do?”

Baz nods and looks away.

“And... that caused you to drive away?”

Baz nods again. Suddenly, Simon seems horribly uncomfortable.

“I- I guess... I'm sorry. If I had known you'd react this way-”

“What? How did you expect me to react?!” “I just thought... I guess I was being stupid.”

Simon looks at him again and his gaze is pleading.

“Can we just go back to how we were and forget this has ever happened?” This catches Baz by surprise. But then again, he knows he'd do anything for Simon.

“That depends... Will you stop it?” “Of course. I'll drop it.”

“And... was it... was it love?”

“What do you mean? Of course I did it out of love!”

It hurts too much.

“Then why do you even want to be together with me? Out of pity? Do you just feel sorry for me?” “What are you talking about?” “You betrayed me, Simon, but I thought I could look past it. But not if you... If you love him.”

“I... betrayed you?” Baz looks away, feeling like an idiot again. Why does Simon pretend he doesn't know what they're talking about?

“You think I cheated on you?” Simon whispers disbelievingly.

“With our neighbor,” Baz confirms.

That's when Simon laughs and Baz feels humiliated. Maybe he should've just driven away and never returned.

“That's ridiculous,” Simon eventually says and takes Baz' hands in his. “I thought you trusted me,” he whispers and sounds hurt.

“I did, but then... You acted so weird. And I heard how he said... That he wants you to break up with me.”

“Oh Baz,” Simon smiles sadly. “He wasn't talking about me. He's been in a secret relationship for a couple of weeks.”

“Not with you?” “Not with me.”

“But what were you hiding from me?”

Baz presses Simon's hands and holds them tight. Simon glances at him nervously and lets go of Baz' hands. He swallows and murmurs: “I didn't want to do it like this, but whatever...”

He drops to one knee. He gets a little box out of his pocket and holds it up to Baz.

“I've been planning this for a while now and I was going to make it really special for you. I would never cheat on you, Baz. You are the only person I can think of. I can't picture a future in which we're not together. I love you and... Just... Will you marry me?” Baz stares at him, eyes wide open.

Okay, I guess I shocked him, Simon thinks and gets more nervous. The ground is damp and Simon just wants Baz to do something, anything. But he doesn't.

“It's okay if you say no but please don't break up with me,” Simon adds. That's when he realized he needs to open the box and he quickly snaps it open to reveal the ring he'd carefully chosen.

Baz still stares. Simon begins to wonder if that equalizes “no”. Maybe he just needs time? Simon gets up awkwardly and rubs his sweaty hands off his trousers.

“You don't have to answer now. I'll give you all the time you need to think about it.”

“Simon.”

“You don't have to answer at all if you're not ready. Or we can get married in twenty years. That's okay with me.” “Simon.” “What?” “Yes.”

And that one word makes Simon smile brighter than ever before.

Take me back to the basics and the simple life Tell me all of the things that make you feel at ease Your touch, my comfort, and my lullaby Holdin' on tight and sleepin' at night

Holdin' on tight and sleepin' at night

Now, Baz finds comfort in knowing that Simon means the world to him and he means the world to Simon in return. They don't know what the future holds but they have made a promise to love each other no matter what. To stay together through everything.

A promise is nothing sure and it's no security. But it means that they'll try and do their best.

Therefore, a promise is all they need.

#carry on fanfiction #snowbaz fanfiction #carry on #snowbaz #baz pitch

140 notes · View notes