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defunctblogtobedeleted · 5 years ago

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9/8/19 8:15pm - Another Weekend Update

So! I just waited through 2 hours of queue, had some nice sush for dinner (just picked up a salmon cut from H Mart, nothing fancy lol), got ahead on my work for the night, and then the server for WoW went down so I guess it’s a sign that I should be doing an update.

I’ve had one hell of a week, actually. It’s only been 9 days but god damn do I have some story updates. First off, my car is still beautiful. And I’m starting to sit a little pretty myself, just made it to 168.8 lbs. So I’m kinda comfortably below 170 now. :3 Finally went running for the first time since wow came out the other day so hopefully I keep that up lmao. I guess I’ve been out walking around town and dancing and shit too though. I also got my hair dyed blonde again! I originally got it cut to look like Brad Pitt from Once Upon A Time In Hollywood, with just a little bit of highlighting, but Maya wanted me to go Full blonde again and I was about it. Checked with a bunch of people and they all said I should, and people are loving it lol.

The first night I had it done when I went to karaoke I got asked by a 40 year old woman if I was a model. As if he heard my ego inflating, this big hulking navy dudebro came up to me within 30 seconds of the compliment, got my attention, and asked “hey. I need to settle a bet. Are you a man or a woman?” Like jesus fucking christ lmao.

Anyway. Karaoke was fun, but there were a lot of birthday parties so it was kinda busy and I went off to Circa to hang out with Jacob. We hung out til like 230 talking about shit and then Jill had me over to crash and fuck.

Hung out with Jill a bunch this week. Accidentally made her oversleep for work one night and she didn’t even care lmao. Our sex has gotten a little better, but she’s still someone I really need to work around which is frustrating.

There was one kind of cool position I wanted to remember, she was laying flat on her belly, left leg cocked off to the side splayed out at a comfortable ~right angle. Having sex with her from behind I was in like a push up position, only using my right arm so that my left could be focused on playing with her pussy. In this position you have sooo much more access to her pussy, it’s not like doggy style where you feel like you’re really kind of stretching awkwardly to get to rub her off. Just takes a little bit more effort holding the position than doggy obviously.

Okay so backtracking to Sunday though, holy shit lol. I spent the whole weekend playing WoW. Like I think a ton on saturday, and then I woke up early and was playing on sunday and considered not even going out to boxcar because I knew maya was out of town. But then Manu hit me up and said him, pacos, christina, and vita were going so I was like oh fuckkkk yes. Went to boxcar, found out they were actually at a different bar, while I chugged down the full bottle of champagne I had bought I talked to this guy about smash bros, and then ran through the rain to go see them and it poured all over me lol. We drank a bit there for a bit, they tried to get a tattoo but couldn’t, we went back to boxcar, had More champagne, I ran into this girl Chelsea that dakota used to go out with at the frat parties who was kinda cute and we talked for a sec, and we’re sitting there playing some foosball when this other girl taps me from behind and says hey how are ya gives me a great big hug, we talk for a few seconds and she walks outside.

I turn to pacos and I’m like “I have no idea who the fuck that is.” So we wrap up our game and I tell him to come outside with me to investigate. Now, I had a pretty simple strategy. I went up to her and asked some basic questions like “hey, so how’ve ya been haven’t seen ya in a bit.” and then she was like “yeah I mean I’m fine haven’t really been doing anything.” and I’m like [shit that doesn’t give me anything to go off at all] so I follow up with “so where are ya living these days?” I don’t know why That’s where my immediate follow up was. Clearly I was predisposed to thinking I was just going to continue running into people from Chapel Hill all night. But she says to me “wait what? I live in Raleigh, we talked about all this like... last weekend.” and I’m like

oh.

shit.

fuck

me.

Because now it clicked into place that the girl standing in front of me who had gone out of her way to say hi to me was none other than MJ, the girl from the party that I was talking about. I had texted her asking her to come out to karaoke and shit but she hadn’t been able to do anything. Maybe work. Maybe not interested. But she would always respond to my texts quick and then nothing would ever work out on her end. But here she was! Staring me in the face and I didn’t even recognize her lmfao. Luckily she was like “I mean we were pretty fucked up that night, it’s fine.” but goddamn I’m an idiot. I kinda like just was facepalming too hard internally to even carry out conversation after that so we split. I tried saying hi to her later when I bummed a cig but she wasn’t very responsive. I was so frustrated with myself that I had blown it so hard that I nearly made myself sick. Or maybe that was the drinking two bottles of champagne plus beer on top without having anything to eat. Who knows, really. After hanging a while at boxcar we grabbed a hotdog and ended the night at Raleigh Times to eat a little bit before splitting. So good chilling with them. Spent some time nostalgiaing with them and telling stories to Peter who had met up with us. And had a sweet waiter who convinced me to not overeat and save my diet. Lol it was a neat day. Idk. Plus I got to go to Jill’s afterward and hook up with her, so that made up a little bit for fucking things so hard with MJ.

Honestly though, despite what the quick responses would suggest, I think she’s not really interested. I mean she definitely isn’t NOW lmfao.

Mon I was supposed to hang with Melanie but she had to flake because of her mom being in town, so I hung out and played a fuckton more wow. So I got my hair done, did karaoke, went to work, played a bunch more wow, and I’m up to lvl 30. TECHNICALLY halfway but like... effectively maybe a quarter? tops?

So this weekend was Hopscotch. Krey. AND it was the weekend that hurrican Fish$ came through. So Thursday just in case shit hit the fan work pushed all my patients to weds/fri and cancelled. Fucking sick.

I got to see my karaoke bartender Tyrone play with his band The Black Surfers that afternoon, went to another band called Illuminati Hotties and they were super cute. Was feeling pretty beat so I went home to nap and play melee and chill for a sec. Met up with Dar to have dinner with her and her friends since they were evac’d from southport. Then for the first time I got to go to Night Rider for karaoke, which I had been recommended like a dozen times but haven’t been able to go since it’s on thursdays.

It. Was. Incredible. Oh my god the vibe is like Emo Karaoke+. Like all the same crowd of non-normies that would go to emo karaoke and all the hype of people screaming for you, but none of the tackiness and forced playlist and overcrowdedness that comes with it. Not that I hate any of that about Emo Karaoke, I love it to death, but it’s amazing for that to happen more naturally. I was expecting to just go and hang out alone and do a few songs, but my new buddy Matt actually recognized me from emo karaoke when I was walking in. I stopped to talk to him and his buddies steph and brie, and ended up hanging out with them the rest of the night. These two other girls Terri and Que (I think), and this guy Pharaoh also chatted with us and it was hilarious. We were talking about weird sex shit and furries and porn and all sorts of weirdness. Terri asked me and Pharaoh if we were on Fetlife, which made me amazingly happy and no longer embarrassed that I made an account on there about a year and a half ago. She told me that I really needed to try to go to this Fetish Night at Legends, which I had actually seen a post about but wasn’t sure if I’d ever do it because it happens once a month on wednesdays. But after she told me that I got her number and then shot my coworker a text to switch days so I’d work sunday and not wednesday (which is why I’m in right now). Terri’s this beautiful short black girl with bright shiny purple hair. It’s totally gorgeous. We’ve been texting the past couple days about weird kink shit. I’m really excited to see her there on wednesday. I bought a pair of supreme cheetah print boxers to match the shirts I have, gonna cut a hole out to stick my tail out through and go in just that and ears. It should look incredible. Especially with my new hair being dirty blonde to match the cheetah print. MMMmmm i just hope everything comes in the mail on time.

Anyway, so I had a blast. They were amazed that I was 27 (most of them were 21, matt’s like 32), and I was told “I hope if I grow up to be your age I look as beautiful as you do.” mmm so kind. Actually it’s like the first time I’ve heard that and not that I was babyfaced or that i’ll look good when I’m old so I’lllll take it. Also everyone loves my hair.

AND since I was with my emo karaoke buddy and everyone was seeming like they were into a pop-punk vibe, I did some Blink182 and MCR. Finally busted out I’m Not Okay after practicing it for forever, and I fucking KILLLLLLED it. People cheered the fuck out of me afterward. I felt like I really needed to impress the gang I was with (especially Terri) so hopefully it worked lolol.

Went to Jill’s at 1am, I’m so fucking glad she’s down to chill at night after I’m done doing shit for the evening. It’s really the most low key fwb thing I’ve ever had in my life I think. So cool. Actually she made me wait to bake these brownies when I got there so I passed out lmfao. But we had sex twice on 9/6, my third favorite day of the year so nice lol. (the first being my birthday, and the second being 6/9 lol.)

Saturday I got off work, played wow at home a while, went to hopscotch at like 2. Got to see my karaoke dj Sam’s band play, he was stoked that I made it out. Hung out with brandon going around town for the day. Saturday the main event was chk chk chk, phantogram, and chvrches and I fucking died it was so good. chk chk chk was inspiring, the dude was mooooving despite being a pot bellied 46 y.o. lmao I loved him. Phantogram was gorgeous and had the best underboob I’d ever seen in my life. Chvrches played mostly new stuff and only a few of their hits, but I love them to death so it was still wonderful. And the best part was that me being me I wiggled me and brandon all the way to the front row of the show, we were dead fucking center, practically against the rails. Technically there was one person in front of me but holy shit it was fucking lit. The bass for chvrches was so loud it practically destroyed my ear drums lmao. Gotta get earplugs for next time.

and despite it being 11, that was practically just the beginning of the night lol. Brandon and I met up with Sam for this last concert, but I was pretty drunk and totally exhausted. It was in an indoor amphitheater so as soon as I got my ass in a chair I passed the fuck out for the whole show. They tell me it was incredible. Idk. The sleep was perfect.

Then we started to go to after parties. Brandon and I got a hot dog to sustain ourselves a little and walked over to this place Five somethingorothers and saw the guy from Sylvan Esso playing some club music, but decided it wasn’t our vibe. He decided to go home, and I ran off to meet up with Sam. We went to slims and I met this girl taylor, we talked about flowers or something, and then a big group of us went to this Ruby after party at a big warehouse building that they had rigged up with music equipment and had a fuckton of kegs to supply drinking for the night. I danced and drank til like 6am it was pretty righteous. Well drank til like 5, until the alcohol ran out. We also ‘broke’ into this dilapidated building to the right (it was open) and gave ourselves a little tour lmao. And it seemed like EVERYBODY that I’ve met the past couple months out at bars and stuff were there. It was so much fun seeing everyone. Alex was there, too, and MJ even showed up at 4am! This time I actually remembered her and said hi first so that was good lmao. She gave me some tequila from a flask but we didn’t really talk much. She was mostly chatting with other guys so I guess she’sssss not really into me. Shame. But whatever so it goes. I’ll just stop hitting her up and see if we keep bumping into each other enough to do something one day, probably the best call. But what was excellent was getting to hang out with Sam and his girlfriend Taylor so much last night. It was so excellent

Now Terri and I, I hope that turns into something weird and beautiful. She just told me she’s into pegging and all sorts of lewd stuff I’m so excited.

This wednesday should be a blast. Idt I have much coming up other than Chris’s wedding in a couple weeks though.

Oh yeah I managed to buy two of my 3 supreme things! I got the jacket and the shirt, just need to get the matching hat and I think I might be done with blowing money on clothes lmfaooo. I guess I need to get khakis for the wedding, and maybe a new pair of shorts or two but that won’t be too much. It feels so nice throwing money around on cool shit and going out drinking and shows and good times lmao. Life is so fucking good right now.

Hope everything keeps staying as interesting, I’ll keep ya posted.

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getseriouser · 7 years ago

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20 THOUGHTS: Deck the Hall, his jokes are folly

RIGHT, well, been some sort of seven days.

The highs of celebrating one of the most exciting players in our generation giving up the game suddenly midseason, through to an awful piece of radio causing nothing but further grief in its wake

The footy is pretty good as well, or is it, because we’re changing the whole game so much it will resemble bat tennis come the end of the year are we not?

Lots to get into, all this redundant intro is just holding back the inevitable..

1. Let us start with the infamous Barry Hall joke last week. This will be of no surprise to most of you. Firstly, Barry’s comments, yeah not funny, came from nowhere. Yes, Liz Ellis, from nowhere, but we’ll get to you soon Liz let me assure you!

The background I want to touch on first is that Erinn’s pregnancy has often been discussed on Triple M when Leigh has been on air. On numerous occasions the radio has got Erinn on the air for a quick chat, and last Friday again was no exception. Leigh has shared some of his biggest moments on air with the listeners, from the calamity of their wedding plans on the breakfast show through to updates with the Erinn and the baby’s progress as he joined the football team this year.

2. Next is that, and we don’t need to address Barry, he had a shocker, we know this, but Leigh was asked by Mark Howard first for the latest ‘milestone’ if you like in the lead up to the big day, to which the sweep indeed had happened just that day, and for those who care to realise, it was then Nathan Brown who then took it up to the cliff’s edge. Mark Howard opened the bowling by asking Leigh “have you had the old stretch”, Leigh at one point then said, “I can’t really explain it…” either unsure or uncomfortable, and then old Browny really got the wheels in motion by “explain it, talk about your wife’s sweep, go on…” and so he did, apologised on the run for being so honest about it, Barry then went with his zinger, and here we now are.

3. Barry doesn’t make the joke nothing is even mentioned. That’s the truth. Leigh has copped it since for his explanation, his description. Two things, not only was the way Leigh described it honest if somewhat off the cuff, but to be real it is what that procedure is – it need not be taboo. Sure, others may have found it uncomfortable (Leigh’s comments, not Barry, we aren’t touching on Barry today), but to suggest Leigh is at fault for what brought this all to a head in the first place, which is Hall’s joke, if you can even call it a joke, is farcical.

4. And before we take aim at some individuals to end this topic, can I just say, some perspective please, for all those who enjoy being offended, and seek offense out so they can proclaim they are offended – little Noah arrived Sunday, he is a gem, he is a little star and maybe one day he’ll pull on his dad’s red, white and black and may he never know about a stupid fallout to some dumb radio only a couple days before his arrival.

5. Ok, so, who’s first up for a lashing. Liz. Right. So she went national on her Sunday morning TV spot, and she’s accruing some poor form in this area, by having a whack at Leigh for talking about his wife. Yes, Triple M, its culture, its style, up for conjecture, no doubt. But as I’ve touched on, Erinn was on the radio herself, and then for Howard and Brown spurring the conversation on, if you’re going to whack Leigh for a moronic link between his comments warranting Hall’s brainfade, then you have to go back a further step – if Leigh wasn’t asked, he wouldn’t have said a thing, and I’d be probably talking about Ross Lyon at this point or something. If we’re going to talk about sanctioning people for being silly on a national broadcast, I’m sure there’s a candidate in the mirror at home, Liz.

6. Now onto my new mate Darren Levin. I don’t know him, he mustn’t be that important. Nor am I, granted, but still nor is he. But I like two of his tweets from last Friday. I’ll give you the second one first, which is “I’ve listened to the Triple M audio and *everyone* should be sacked. Why were they even talking about it in the first place?”. Wow, ok, settle down. But only minutes earlier he tweeted, “CAN SOMEONE PLS TELL ME WHAT HE SAID? IT’S KILLLLLLING ME”. Now Darren. No. We aren’t sacking everyone, don’t be so alarmist. But if you’re going to be so curious and dirty for something that your desperation for the audio is killlllllllllling you, then you’ve got larger issues mate. I do hope you can find a way out of this sadness. Best wishes.

7. And lastly, Grant Thomas. Now mate, Grant, old wobblearse Thommo. Let’s go the the audio:

“I am a big fan of Leigh’s but I think Joey should resign. I wouldn’t sack them, that’s the easy way out. Because one man’s been sacked I would think hang on I was actually culpable in this and if it hadn’t have been for my stupidity poor old Barry wouldn’t have said what he said. It’s at least his responsibility to suspend himself for a period of time to make a statement.”

Facts are important here, and clearly the failed Saints ex-coach has gone large on his former player not knowing or caring for the facts. Thommo has form on Twitter and his podcast, deliberately being controversial to spike an interest from the public he otherwise wouldn’t have. Perhaps he suffered a bad head knock from one of his chins when one day he was far too vigorous when nodding. Who knows.

8. I’m happy to move on.

9. State of the game, this one continues to infuriate. Kinda feel like this year’s premiership race is just getting in the way, the sooner the season ends the sooner we can all preach at the church of reform and the summit to work out the gazillion rule changes to save the sport from certain doom can take place. Um. Do we need to send Guide Dogs Australia down to Town Hall? With the return of a nine-game round after the byes period, last week we had, and let’s be balanced here, Thursday night, cracker, Friday night, belter, all four Saturday games meandered between just fine to really engaging tight games, Sunday gave us one lopsided upset but a high scoring spectacle and a two-point thriller. Steve Hocking, yes you man, baby, bathwater, don’t do it mate, step back from the ledge.

10. Whilst we’re on mistakes, Susan Alberti. Not her, she’s lovely no doubt, even if she does make a right mess of security doing their jobs, especially when they wouldn’t know her from any other AFLW spectator, but she’s been awarded Victorian of the Year. And well done to her for all the work she does. But how has Neale Daniher, in all the years since he started his crusade, miss out on being awarded Victorian of the Year? Mike Brady got it last year. Yes, the ‘Up There Cazaly’ guy. Yet Neale is overlooked. Who’s in charge? Sir James Gobbo I hear is the chair or something of the Victoria Day council. Now Gobbo. Fix it. Neale’s a legend. Don’t go past Go, don’t collect $200, Gobbo, just fix it.

11. Who else? Gary Ablett and Patrick Dangerfield. Yep, not good enough. I think they’ve been getting tips off Zali Stegall. Downhill skiers the lot of them. Numerous passages of play against the Dogs where they’d get into a strong sprint when they had possession, but, turnover, the Bulldogs player that was chasing them, turns and burns, ends up being part of the scoring chain uncontested whilst the Brownlow medallists are sauntering miles back assuming one of the non-Brownlow medallists will do their dirty work for them. Lazy? Selfish? Dunno, you chose your own adjective. Chose all of them if you like, don’t let me pressure you Nathan Brown style.

12. Melbourne footy club. Hmm. Let’s not worry about which parcel of Yarra Park land you want to train on, how about just screw your heads on and don’t let St Kilda embarrass you on your home ground. The Saints had no right to escape from a loss to the Gold Coast, yet made you all look like fruits, stewed fruits. I have no idea of the analogy here, other than to say I’m reasonably confident stewed fruits don’t make the finals, and you did it last year Demons, go on, lose the unlosable finals spot again, it would be as the kids say ‘so lit’.

13. We mentioned the Suns, which players have the Gold Coast improved? Jack Martin was supposed to be a gun, he isn’t, Ainsworth's played 27 games but so what, Touk Miller is at 74 games but wouldn't get a gig for North Ballarat, David Swallow's had injuries, so we'll give him that, Aaron Hall has played 100 games but we'd forgotten about him, then there's Day, Lonergan, Sexton, even Peter Wright doesn’t scare anyone at 44 games. Jarryd Lyons may be the only improved player on their list. Don’t give them concessions, you can give them an all-star team, the issue is that talent dissipates once it lands at Coolangatta airport. The Logies were ok in Melbourne, goes up to the Gold Coast, looks like a Channel 31 production. The Gold Logie winner doesn’t even have a show. Staggering.

14. Quick change of sports but I’ve got my back up and I’m running downhill with the wind – so Aaron Finch is in form is he? An 84, 68* and 172 in his last three matches, all in twenty 20s. The Aussies more broadly, two big wins from two in the Zimbabwe T20 tri-series. Hang on. No. Who the hell cares about some T20 games in Zimbabwe in July when there's a 50-over World Cup 12 months from now and in the most recent series of that format, in England, five minutes ago, we got sodomised five nil. Don't want to hear about how Finchy or the rest of the team looks great in a hit and giggle in Harare, it’s like if old mate brought a high-pressure hose to Hiroshima in August 1945 saying a quick rinse is all this place needs. Don’t wanna hear about it Finchy, get some runs in a longer format and I’ll reconsider.

15. Oh, do we want to mention the nation of the Philippines before we get onto some other stuff? How Chris Goulding walks away with only some bruises from a dozen men punching, kicking, stomping, hitting him with chairs, is so fortunate. But, obviously the Philippine basketballers can fight as well as they can play basketball. Right mugs the lot of them. But if you’re stuck in an alleyway between confronting an angry Filipino basketballer or a sleepy field mouse, I’d be running away from the field mouse, their teeth are surprisingly sharp.

16. Cyril. How’d you get this far down the list champion? So his Dad had heart issues I believe last year (I’ll stand corrected in case I get a call from Liz Ellis), and basically, unlike Dayne Beams who could get a trade to a new club based in the city where his ailing Dad resides, Cyril’s old man lives in Darwin, and if Tassie can’t get a team yet, then Darwin is way behind them. So, for a player who has always said he wouldn’t be a league footballer too long after turning 30 (he is a couple weeks shy of turning 29), ‘Junior Boy’ has called it a day a year or two early to be around his family. He was this close to doing this last offseason, Shaun Burgoyne essentially twisted his arm to go one more year, a knee injury and then officially putting a line through it now brings us to here.

17. We’ve all seen the record the last couple of days, but four premierships, one of six in that famous dynasty to be a part of all of them (Burgoyne has four, but one was at Port). Three All-Australians, don’t forget the Norm Smith in 2015, but that he was also so influential in turning the game in the ’08 granny as a teenager. For freakish, athletic ability, be it leaping, tackling, borking, sprinting, unparalleled in our time.

18. Want to give a shout out to the Tiwi Islands. A series of many islands, two larger ones though, Melville and Bathurst Islands, about 1000 people each. Melville Island though, tiny, tiny place, yet it has produced 3 Norm Smith medallists out of the 37 to receive the award: Cyril in 2015, Michael Long in 1993, and Cyril’s uncle Maurice in 1982. Not only from the same island, but the same family to boot.

19. On that family, Maurice Rioli, South Fremantle and Richmond superstar of the 1980s, uncle to Cyril, great uncle to Daniel, his son, Maurice Jr, he would be the 2020 draft but already playing cracking senior footy for St Mary's in the NT as a teenager. Will be a gun first round father son pick to Richmond or Fremantle and the lineage will continue. His cousin Willie also, looking fairly good for the Eagles too, who is Ronnie Burns cousin on his mother's side as well. What a family!

20. Lastly, World Cup, I’m as confident that Vladimir Putin had a hand in ‘organising’ the five-nil result for the hosts against Saudi Arabia as I am Liz Ellis having another shocker this Sunday morning on the telly. So all this talk of “its coming home” from those with bad teeth and confused by the concept of the shower, the fact that it’s merely Sweden and then Croatia in the way to a first World Cup final since 1966, don’t underestimate the nerve, or is that nerve agent, of the Russian leader. Golden Boot nominees to this point:

Kane, Mbappe, Putin.

(originally published 5 July)

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