#maybe unless i find another fun challenge that i can mix with selfships

[monsterkiss]

One of the things I appreciate a lot about choosing to do Cringetober is that it made me feel closer to my F/Os because I've been spending all this time drawing them and thinking about them.

Another thing is that it pushed me to draw selfship art probably for the first time in about 3 years. It provided me with ideas (prompts) and motivation (time constraints + it being a challenge that lots of other people are doing, and jumping on the bandwagon seems to be interesting/entertaining enough for my brain).

Generally it's also been keeping me somewhat busy since it created this sort of artificial schedule I'm trying to follow and, then again, pushed me to draw more in general. It reminded me that I also can, in fact, draw more than once per several months. That even if drawing has felt pretty damn hard for a while now, even impossible sometimes, I still can manage to do it, and do it in a way I like and then again, not spend literal months trying to finish one single thing, reminded me that I can finish some drawings relatively quickly.

Of course it helps that like I said, it provided me with a list of prompts, gave me motivation and sort of a schedule… Once again I'm reminded that I work best with time constaints or some kind of pressure. (Even when I really really hate it... not in this particular case but lots of others.)

Because in case of a monthly challenge, I know that if I fall behind the "schedule", even if it doesn't actually matter, but I'd be dragging behind while more and more days of Cringetober pass, and that doesn't feel good to me, and then I'd end up feeling overwhelmed and would probably just completely drop it. That's also why it's important that I've chosen to ignore some of the prompts and not try to do everything because otherwise, again, I'd get overwhelmed and would hardly finish anything, and that's also why it's good that for some prompts I've made pretty messy and simplistic drawings. I've actually never managed to stick to a monthly drawing challenge this long before, I think.

So just, this has been pretty cool.